#ni kar'tayli gar darasuum

[kalevalakryze]

this is the second time I've been thrown this and i am anjvbhkjdsnj knsdjk nkjavbkjdsncjvkvdnjk

I made it

[gloomwitchwrites]

Gold Chain

Din Djarin x Female Mandalorian Armorer Reader

Content & Trigger Warnings: fluff, light angst, slightly jealous / possessive Din, Mandalorian culture, canon-typical swearing, reclaimed Mandalore, Din’s POV

Word Count: 4.3k

Din intended to take Grogu with him back to Nevarro after Mandalore was reclaimed. Duty kept him in the ruins of Sundari, helping Bo-Katan and the other Mandalorians in their efforts to rebuild. Over time, an Armorer from another tribe caught his eye. Din is drawn to you, visiting repeatedly. Seeing everyone else around him find happiness, Din finally decides to seek it for himself.

ao3 // taglist // main masterlist // fluffuary 2024 masterlist

Mando’a Translations: cyar’ika – darling / sweetheart ka’rta beskar – iron heart Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum – I love you Ori'haat – It’s the truth riduur – spouse / partner Vor entye – thank you

The Great Forge of Mandalore is not a singular forge but several.

The large, tree-like monoliths are connected to each other like the collective beating heart of the Mandalorian people. Only three of them are in use as the rest sustained damaged during Imperial aerial bombardment. Like the people they represent, the dead forges are undergoing repairs.

Soon, they will burn and build again.

It requires more than a lone Mandalorian Armorer to keep the fires lit, to shape and bend the beskar, to smelt and refine the metal, to dig into the earth and excavate the ore. For a small covert on a distant planet, one armorer is enough. The forge used is special but tiny. A drab replica of the real thing.

That is no longer the case.

Mandalore belongs to the Mandalorians again. Its people flourish. They thrive, and the urge to rebuild—not just the cities but to grow as a people—is an innate, desperate need felt by all. It is a pounding, driving force like the beat of ceremonial drums.

The air should ring with the sound of a hundred hammers. Foundlings and younglings should be roaming freely, their shouts of joy floating in the breeze. The clans, while different in the ways they adhere to the Way, should be a united front.

All of this deserves to be true, but that is not the reality.

The air does not ring with the sound of a hundred hammers. It only rings with a few.

Foundlings and younglings are not free to roam. There are too many dangers lurking in the dark.

The clans are not a united front. There are plenty who are stuck in their ways and refuse to budge for the sake of the whole.

Some Mandalorians perceive this as a failure.

Din Djarin does not see it that way.

For him, he remembers a time when his ideas about what it meant to be Mandalorian consumed his reality. His covert and their principles were the only thing that mattered to him. The urge to adhere to that life was severe to the point that Din pushed other Mandalorians away.

He no longer holds to those strict ideals. Every Mandalorian here and elsewhere are important to him. Every foundling. Every youngling. Every clan and tribe. All of it.

They deserve to be protected.

They deserve to live on.

They deserve to endure.

That is why Din skulks in the shadow of the Great Forge like a kriffing idiot. He is looking for someone—a woman. Behind the visor in his helmet, Din observes the massive room. The Mandalorian Armorer from his tribe stands near one of the forges. Several helmeted younglings surround her in a short half-moon. They hang on her every word while in her hands is a raw piece of beskar that she turns end over end.

Din is not here for her. He is searching for you, and you are always here. You, who has been on his mind these last few months.

His gaze rolls past the Armorer, finding you near a mountainous pile of beskar. Like the Armorer of his tribe, you are also a Mandalorian Armorer, but there are no younglings or foundlings at your feet.

Picking up a piece from the pile, you examine it, turning it over between your hands before depositing it into one of three nearby bins. Some of it is raw and untreated but there are also helmets, pauldrons, and other pieces mixed in. All of it pulled from the Mines below.

Din has never seen your face, nor does he care. He only knows what his heart wants. It is an insistently nauseating need to be close to you. Solitude and clan are comforts to Din, but they are not enough. Not like they used to be. Every day, Din watches other Mandalorians find happiness and contentment. Their peacefulness is like spice to him, causing him to wonder about what his life could be.

This idea plagues him, and it is why he comes to the Great Forge every day. To see you.

But what is today’s excuse? It’s almost always Grogu.

Din will bring him along and casually mention the importance of watching the Mandalorian Armorers work their craft. At some point, Grogu will be handed off to someone, and then Din lingers near your workstation while he attempts to make conversation.

Attempt is the important word here. Small talk is a genuine failure of his. He doesn’t understand. What comes out of him is fragmented bits of conversation that don’t entirely make sense. Din is awkward, stumbles over his words, and is genuinely flustered by your presence.

Moving out of the shadows, Din ascends the stairs up to the Great Forge. The Armorer briefly glances in Din’s direction before returning her attention to the younglings. You haven’t noticed Din yet, and he takes this moment to admire you.

The armor you wear is unique and unlike anything Din has seen before. The beskar is painted black, the mid-day light reflecting off its shiny surface as you pick up another chunk of untreated ore. Around the t-shaped visor and the ka’rta beskar, is golden paint. But the focal point are the horns on the helmet.

The Armorer of Din’s tribe has horns as well, but they are small and only five in total. Yours curl out and around like Bantha horns. From the base of the bottom-most curl, thin gold chains hang down from small puncture holes in the metal. The ends rest against the fur that lines your shoulders. One of the holes is empty, clearly absent a chain.

At first, Din thought the choice odd, but it’s a nod to your people and how they revere the title of Armorer. It’s ceremonial. Not functional.

Din strides toward you, and when you finally notice his approach, you immediately place whatever you’re holding down, turning toward him. Warmth instantly blooms everywhere, rushing through Din’s limbs like the heat of Tatooine.

“Din Djarin,” you breathe, and it is a gentle sigh.

He loves the way you say his name, as if it’s a secret between the two of you.

“Armorer,” he replies, just as softly.

You laugh and Din flushes behind the helmet. He wants to hear your happiness all the time. “You can call me by my name. We know each other well enough.”

Din inclines his head but does not use your given name. It feels too personal. Too forward. This is new territory for him. He longs to draw you close but fears accidentally pushing you away.

He’s taking things slow. He’s taking things carefully. You are important to him and he doesn’t want to mess it up.

“Where is Grogu?” you ask.

“School,” Din replies instantly, knowing he cannot use the foundling as an excuse.

“That’s wonderful. Lady Kryze mentioned they were trying to put one together.”

Din shrugs. “It keeps him busy.”

“First day?”

Din nods.

“You’re nervous,” you observe.

You’re good at reading him which is startling to Din since he never removes his helmet. Your clan allows it with immediate family and one’s riduur, a fact Din is highly aware of.

“That’s normal,” you continue. “You love him. Want what’s best.”

“We’ve rarely been apart,” replies Din quietly.

“He’s safe.”

“I know.”

The two of you fall into silence and Din doesn’t know where to go from here. He almost always starts these conversations by asking if you’re in need of anything like beskar. Kriffing hell, he’ll even run errands for you. Fetch whatever you ask.

As long as it keeps him in your proximity.

“I—” he begins, cutting off quickly to try and formulate the next thing he wants to say.

“Yes?” You step closer, your arms nearly brushing.

Din is losing his nerve. You’re so close, and Din leans in a bit, pretending that this is more than what it is.

He clears his throat. “Did you need anything? Can I be of service in some way?”

You pause, helmet glancing toward the overflowing piles of beskar. “More of it comes from the Mines every day. I’ve been taking inventory as it arrives.” You sigh heavily. “I worry about the groups that descend into the Mines. I shouldn’t but it’s dangerous, and us Mandalorians are already so few.”

“Your clan helped with that,” says Din, because it’s true.

Bo-Katan had to explain it to him, that your tribe left Mandalore almost a thousand years ago. Disagreement ran rampant, and they headed for a distant planet far in the Outer Rim, nearly into the Unknown Regions. Flourishing where they landed, your people left the galaxy to its own troubles.

“I suppose we did,” you answer.

But they heard the call to return, and Bo-Katan only knew about your clan’s existence because of the Night of a Thousand Tears. They were too late to help, but they went on to save as many Mandalorians as they could, even going so far as to raid Imperial vessels and storage facilities that held beskar.

“You could help with that.”

“Yes,” he says slowly. “Anything.”

“Anything?” you ask, and Din hears the tease in it. The soft way it drops from your lips.

Yes. Anything.

“Command me at your pleasure,” purrs Din.

You clasp your gloved hands in front of you. “Your help pleases me, Din Djarin.”

He melts into the floor. Becomes a puddle. “What would you like me to do?”

You glance at the massive pile behind you. “It all needs to be sorted. Unrefined beskar goes here.” You point to the barrel on the far left. “Helmets, vambraces, or anything with wiring needs to go in that bin.” You turn toward the final bin. “Everything else goes in there.”

Din might not forge armor, but the structure and functions of it are as natural to him as breathing. He approaches the pile, begins sorting. The two of you work in tandem, and anything he’s not completely sure about, he brings to you.

The best part of this is your presence. The worst is that Din wants to talk to you but isn’t sure how. His tribe is not one for small talk, and this is excruciating to him. Din desires to hear your voice, to keep your focus on him, even if it’s a fleeting moment.

Din picks up a dented chest plate and deposits it into the correct bin. “Do you have everything you need?”

You glance up from inspecting a vambrace, looking around the area directly in your vicinity. “Yes?”

“I meant outside this.” Din extends one hand outward, indicating the Great Forge.

Slowly, you drop the vambrace into the bin next to you. “Am I missing something?”

Me, thinks Din. You’re missing me.

“Adequate food? Shelter?”

“My basic needs are met.”

Din picks up a helmet and places it into the correct bin without looking. “And beyond that?” He strides toward you, wanting to find something in your life that he could insert himself in to. Even the smallest thing is enough.

“What do you mean?”

There are so many ways to answer that. What Din truly wants to know is if there is anyone else in your life. If there is anyone else he might have to compete with for your affection. It’s not like he hasn’t subtly asked around or kept a careful eye on the other Mandalorians you speak with on a daily basis. But that doesn’t mean he hasn’t missed something.

“Are you happy, cyar’ika?” The word of affection slips out without thought. Din cannot take it back.

There is a gentle shift in the way you draw back. It’s not from revulsion, disgust, or even anger. It’s only surprise. He has startled you, and Din is unsure if this will derail everything he’s tried to build.

“Yes,” you respond after a short stretch of silence. “But I could always be happier.”

Hope blooms in Din’s chest, slithering out like vines to wrap around his ribcage. He moves closer, one gloved hand reaching out, itching to touch.

“Din Djarin.”

You and Din turn abruptly.

Bo-Katan Kryze lingers near the edge of the stairs, her helmet tucked under arm. “I need to speak with you.”

Din turns back to you and your nod. Placing your hand over your heart, you bow your head. Din knows this greeting and goodbye. It’s normal for your clan to use it with people they’re close to. But then you extend your hand outward, gloved fingers lightly brushing the side of Din’s helmet before dropping away.

“Vor entye.”

Din inclines his head, stepping away from you and toward Bo-Katan. His heart pounds in his chest, the sound rattling in his ears, making the helmet seem small and claustrophobic for the first time in his life.

Din’s gloved thumb rubs up and down the small gold chain in his hand.

It’s thin enough to be a necklace, but that is not its purpose. The gold chain is a replacement piece for the one you’re missing. He discreetly asked the Armorer to make it, and she did so without question, taking great care to create an exact match to the ones you already have.

He holds it in one hand, absently stroking the material as he walks toward the Great Forge. There is no plan to hide in the shadows this time. With the gold chain clenched in his fist, Din strides forward with purpose with the intent to give it to you just like all the other gifts he’s given.

As the enters the large room, Din’s gaze first knocks the Armorer, but when he finds you, and time comes to a grinding halt.

You are not alone.

Another Mandalorian, a man that Din has seen around but doesn’t know, talks with you near one of the working forges. The armor he wears is red and faded. He stands entirely too close for Din’s liking but that isn’t what truly irritates him.

This man keeps touching you. He’s not grabbing for you or forcefully entering your space. Every movement is light and delicate. Sometimes he briefly rests his hand on your arm, waist, or shoulder. He leans in like he can kiss you through his helmet. And Din cannot tell if you’re receptive or not.

You’re not reacting. That much he can see. You do not touch back or lean in. Not like you do with Din. While that comforts him, all he knows is that someone else is pushing in and making a move into his space.

Din quickly ascends the stairs, his strides long and poundingl. The male Mandalorian shifts slightly as you glance over his shoulder before fully turning in Din’s direction. The moment he notices Din, he steps in front of you as if you need protecting.

Cold fury flares within him, igniting a path from his stomach to his head. You step around the stranger, brushing past him to reach Din.

“Din,” and your greeting is just like yesterday, breathy and soft. All that anger starts to melt away because you’re in front of him, and that is all that matters.

You come to a stop just shy of Din’s right shoulder. Gently, you rest your hand on his bicep, the part that isn’t covered by his pauldron.

Turning back to the Mandalorian in red armor, you dismiss him. “Thank you for coming by, Rhuk.”

Rhuk’s t-shaped visor is angled toward Din as he inclines his head in goodbye. “Be well, Armorer.” Din watches him go, tracking his every step until he’s down the stairs and moving away from the Great Forge.

So focused on Rhuk, it takes you three firm squeezes of Din’s arm to draw his attention away.

“Did you bring me something?” you ask, glancing down at his hand.

Din opens it, presenting the small gold chain. You glance up quickly.

“It’s a replacement,” says Din, nodding toward the side of your helmet with the missing link.

You’re hand automatically reaches up, fingertips lightly brushing against the empty spot. It hovers there briefly before falling to Din’s open palm. With gentleness, you slip your fingers under the gold chain.

“Would you like to attach it?” you ask, your helmet tipping upward. Even with it on, Din feels your eyes on him, assessing.

“Is that okay?”

You turn toward a collection of tools. Heading toward it, you select a tiny torch and bring it back to Din.

“Use this,” you offer the torch to him and he takes it. “Slide the chain through and weld it like the others.”

Turning to your left, you present the side of your helmet. Din tucks the base of the torch into his belt. With both hands, he hooks the end of the chain into the hole, pushing it through, guiding it until it sits equal on both sides. Removing the torch, he starts it, turning it to the lowest setting. Din switches, changing the angle of the torch from one side to the other, slowly fusing the two pieces together. Satisfied, Din turns off the torch and admires his work.

“I’m not an armorer,” says Din.

“It’s perfect.”

“You haven’t checked it.”

You shrug. “I don’t need to.” Pride swells in Din’s chest but he remains silent. “Are you staying?” The question hangs in the air, and that quick flood of pride fades a bit. You sound so hopeful.

“No. I can’t stay,” answers Din.

“Well. Thank you.” You lift your hand and tap one finger against the new gold chain. “Tomorrow?”

Tomorrow. You want to see him…tomorrow.

Din nods. “Tomorrow.”

Din begins slowly backing away from you. Turning at the last second, Din nearly misses the top step. He recovers quickly, but hears your soft, stifled laugh from behind him.

Heat flaring in his cheeks, Din descends, heading for the hall that will take him toward Bo-Katan’s council room.

“You should be honest with her.” The Armorer appears at Din’s side like a golden shadow. His head swivels in her direction. The Armorer continues looking forward. “Their tribe is different. You must follow their lead and do as they do.”

Din frowns. Why is the Armorer involving herself?

“How do I do that?” he asks slowly.

“The one that was here pursued her in the way that is custom. You must be as aggressive, Din Djarin.”

She’s giving him advice.

“That is not our way.”

It’s true. Din’s tribe is restrictive when it comes to personal attachments. There is the attachment to tribe, and there is attachment to one’s foundling. Everything is and has always been in service to the whole, never the individual.

“No,” agrees the Armorer. “But it is hers. And she is still Mandalorian.”

The Armorer made an exception with Bo-Katan. Now that all of the clans are together, are the lines somehow blurred? To Din, her words sound like encouragement.

“Then it is permitted?” he asks.

“You seek a happiness that will only strengthen us as a people. It is a noble act. A welcome one.” She pauses. “Do not fear it.”

Din opens his mouth, words forming on his tongue, but the Armorer is already walking away, disappearing as quickly as she appeared.

Bo-Katan’s council room is a blur. It is monotone voices and forgotten ideas. They fuse and dissolve into background noise that is a dull droll in the recesses of his consciousness. You consume his thoughts, occupying his mind, pushing everything else out. The Armorer’s words repeat in his head.

Din stands in the very back of the room, leaning against the wall. The council room is packed full of Mandalorians. There are representatives of multiple tribes and clans. There are updates on the mining operations, discussions about farming and food cultivation, and debates on how to design and start a working energy grid.

While Din keeps one ear trained on the room, the rest of him is elsewhere. Din has always considered himself a man of action. He takes initiative, he faces countless dangers even with the potential for failure, and he never gives up. But with you, Din is as cautious and unsteady as a Rancor’s temper. He only wishes to make you happy, for you to choose him over everyone else.

Aggressive. The Armorer said to be aggressive, to pursue you in the way of your tribe.

Din cannot wait until tomorrow.

The moment Bo-Katan dismisses everyone, Din is off like a blaster bolt, heading back toward the Great Forge. It is late, and there are long shadows across the massive room as he enters. The Armorer is not there, but you are. With your back to him, you have not noticed him yet, and Din takes these solitary seconds to calm his racing heart.

Nervousness seeps in like water finding the openings beneath his armor. The tips of his fingers buzz with anticipation, and all of Din’s senses are heightened and alert like he’s facing down a Mudhorn and not simply about to tell you how he feels.

Swallowing down the trepidation and solidifying his resolve, Din heads for the stairs, taking them two at a time.

“May I speak with you?” he calls out, voice ringing loudly in the empty hall.

You start, turn, shoulders immediately softening when you realize who it is that is speaking. Already, you’re moving toward him and Din’s heart hammers with how quickly you respond. He strides forward, meeting you halfway.

“You came back,” and there is such joy in your voice that Din cannot help himself.

One hand reaches out to rest against the lower-half of your waist just above your hip. Instinct rushes in, and Din’s gloved hand tightens, drawing you closer against him. Your own hand rises, stopping at his chest plate, finding respite just shy of the ka’rta beskar in his armor.

“I needed to see you,” replies Din. Absently, his other hand brushes through the gold chains, finding the new one, only for his fingers to lightly twine around it.

You press in a bit closer, and Din relaxes into the embrace. There is a naturalness to it, the way the two of you stand together. It is its own thrumming drum, something that sits within Din’s chest, beating beside his heart. It moves and twists, the feeling snaking outward to slither between rib bones and around his lungs. Everything comes together, and Din knows that this is right.

This is how it should always be.

“To talk?” you ask.

“To talk.” Din’s fingers release the newly added gold chain. That hand falls, coming to a stop at your elbow. “Come with me.”

You turn with him, the two of you heading deeper into the shadows of the Great Forge. There is no one else in the room but Din wants no interruptions.

“Is there something wrong? Is it Grogu?”

“No,” says Din quickly. “He’s fine.” Reaching out again, Din draws you back to him. You go without resistance, the two of you nearly fused together.

Din needs to just say it. Why have any doubt? You’re hanging on his every word and literally hanging on to him. Every day, Din comes to you. Every day for months. Every day you greet him with tiny touches or gentle greetings. You are always so open, always so warm, and Din misses it—misses you whenever you’re apart.

So, he says it, plainly and without hesitation.

“I missed you.” Your fingers tighten on his arm, chest rising slight, and Din catches the small inhalation. “I miss you all the time,” he continues. “The moments I’m not with you are lonely ones.”

“But you see me every day.” Your voice is a whisper, one so soft that the voice receiver in your helmet hardly picks it up.

“And it is not enough.”

“Din—”

“I wanted to leave after. To take Grogu and return to Nevarro. But I stayed, not just from duty, but because I was drawn to you.” Din shakes his head absently. “I didn’t understand at first. I didn’t want to. But as I spent more time with you, I never wished to leave your presence. I needed to be near you all the time.”

Your arms start to slide around him and Din melts into the touch, the two of you coming together in the shadows.

“I wake and my first thoughts begin with you. Before I rest, my last thoughts end with you. My happiness and future are tied with your own.” Din lowers his voice. “I only make an offer and hope you’ll accept.”

Din’s next inhale is a shudder. “Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum.”

“Din,” you sigh, and he has no idea if you sound happy or sad.

“Ori'haat. I say these words from my heart.”

You place one hand on his chest, this time right over the ka’rta beskar. It slides upward, and gently cups the side of Din’s helmet. He leans into the touch, sighing with contentment.

“You’re an honorable man, Din Djarin. To hear you say this brings me joy.”

Din immediately tightens his hold, every nerve in his body telling him to take you away, to exchange the words and be done with it.

“I am happiest when you’re with me,” you continue. “I am always at ease. At peace. Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum, Din. I wish to never be apart.”

Din lowers his head, his helmeted forehead pressing lightly to your own.

The instinct to kiss you flames within him, but Din does not remove his helmet. It remains in place. In time, it will happen. In time, he will gaze upon your face and find peace within your eyes. All of that will happen.

He has gone without you for this long.

Until it is official, Din can wait a little longer.

taglist:

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[thegreymarveljedi]

Reunited At Last

(Rebels! Rex x Reader)

Okay! So this is my first time posting a fanfic here and I’m so nervous that something is going to go wrong so please be patient with me!

This is a Rebels! Rex x Reader story with a flashback to the Clone Wars Era. Bear with me for some non lore accurate stuff because it’s fanfic, it doesn’t have to be completely accurate.

The reader and Ahsoka are go friends in this and the reader also knows The Bad Batch as well. She went through Order 66 and stuff so please be kind to me with how I’ve written it.

This fanfic also heavily relies on dialogue directly from Star Wars Rebels Season 2, Episode 3, The Lost Commanders. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED FOR LUCAS FILMS.

Warnings: 18+, Minor DNI, Angst, anxiety attack, allusions to PTSD, hurt/comfort, talk of force visions, SMUTTTTT, unprotected p in v sex, creampie, oral F-receiving, teasing, pet names, order 66 scene, canon-typical violence, pregnancy, force bond and connections work how I need them too, swearing, happy ending.

Words: 13.0k

—————

Mando’a Translations

Ner ad - My son

Buir - Mother (in this context)

Oh ner ad. Udesiir. Haalur ti ni ad’ika - oh my son. Relax. Breathe with me little one

Cyar’ika - Darling

Cyare - beloved

Dala - Woman

Ori’vod - older brother

Di’kuts - idiots

Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum - I love you

Ner Alor’ad - my captain

Su cuy’gar - you’re still alive!

Sha’jika al’verde - Cease fire commander!

Udes verde - Rest soldiers

Su cuy’gar ner alor’ad - you’re alive my captain

—————

I opened my eyes to the feeling of a weight on my chest, the blankets on my cot being rustled before they settled back down. I felt an arm wrapped around my stomach and squeezing gently. I smiled softly and pulled my little, not so little anymore, boy into my arms, scratching his head as he breathed a sighed.

“Did I wake you mom?” He asked and I smiled and shook my head.

“It’s okay ner ad. What’s on your mind?” I asked and my son Cody, peeked up from where he lay in my arms.

“I-I-“ he stuttered, words failing to come out. I pulled him into my arms a little tighter, just holding him and stroking his hair. He calmed down as the minutes ticked by, not saying a word yet but I didn’t mind, I was here for him.

“I had a vision ma..” he said quietly and I tensed briefly before relaxing again, holding my son a little tighter. I took a deep breath before sitting up with Cody in my arms. I manoeuvred him so that he was sat beside me, my arms still around him.

“What was it about honey?” I asked quietly, still in shock that my 14 year old was having visions.

“ I -I think it was about…dad..” he said hesitantly. I flinched a little harder at that and pulled Cody into me even more, trying to hold back the tears that were beginning to form.

“W-what about your father?” I asked quietly and sniffed, trying not to think about the man I love. Or loved I guess.

“I think he’s alive buir,” Cody whispered and I finally let go of him, standing up abruptly only to collapse to the floor.

“Mom!” Cody yelped and came to my side, trying to help me. I was shaking now, having flashbacks to the last time I saw my beloved husband. My breathing became faster and my hands began to clam up.

“Kanan!” Cody yelled as he came in front of me, holding my face in his hands.

“Mom! Mom look at me,” He said and my eyes shifted rapidly to his before darting around the room more, trying to ground myself. Just then the door to our quarters swung open and Kanan appeared, the rest of the Ghost crew in the door way.

“(Y/N)!” Kanan said and came to Cody’s side in front of me, holding my shoulders gently yet firmly. He turned back to look at Hera who knew exactly what that meant. She ushered Zeb and Sabine to the kitchenette to get some water and rations as Ezra came into the room and sat next to Kanan.

“(Y/N), can you hear me?” He said and I felt myself nod, my eyes still darting around. Cody sat there frozen, knowing that mentioning his dad was a difficult subject but not wanting to lie to me.

“What happened Cody?” Ezra asked quietly as Kanan continued trying to pull me out of my panic attack. He held my hands now, trying to let me know that I was safe.

Cody moved over to be closer to Ezra, trying not to trigger me with his words. He leaned over and whispered to Ezra what happened, Ezra looking at him with wide eyes once he finished the explanation.

“(Y/N), you’re okay. Do you know where you are?” Kanan asked and I nodded.

“T-the Gho-ost-“ I stuttered out, my hand blindly reaching for Cody’s hand. He grabbed mine immediately, holding it in his.

“Okay, that’s a start. Do you remember who I am?” He asked next, hands back on my shoulders. I nodded again.

“K-Kanan Jarrus, knight of the Jedi - Jedi order.,” I said, blinking rapidly trying to focus my eyes on Kanan.

“And who are you?” He asked quietly and I closed my eyes, focusing on my surroundings. I held Cody’s hand in mine, my other hand finding purchase on Kanans shoulder and my head finding a place on Ezra’s shoulder. I slowly exhaled before my eyes opened again, lifting my head and looking at Kanan then Ezra and finally looking to my son.

“(Y/N) (L/N), Jedi Master and mother to a beautiful son,” I said and a small smile graced my lips. Cody smiled and launched himself at me as the door to our quarters opened up again, Hera, Sabine and Zeb standing there with some water and rations.

“You okay (Y/N)?” Hera asked and I nodded, my arms wrapped tightly around my Cody, his around me.

“What happened?” Sabine asked and Ezra stood up and took the rations and water from her and Zeb, handing them to Kanan who placed them on the floor next to me. Ezra led Zeb and Sabine to the common room to explain the situation, Hera staying back to make sure I was okay.

“I’m okay Hera. Thanks to you guys,” I said and Cody began to let go.

“I’m sorry mom,” He whispered and hung his head, sniffling.

“Oh ner ad. Udesiir. Haalur ti ni ad’ika,” I said. Cody took a deep breath, following my breathing until his tears stopped forming. Kanan sat there with us, just his presence in the force enough to calm me down. Kanan had become like a brother to me in these last few years, helping me to raise Cody to be a kindhearted boy. Hera was like a sister to me, always making sure that the Ghost was a safe space for me to be. Zeb, Ezra, and Sabine I saw as my kids too. I always wanted to be strong for them.

“You okay now (Y/N)?” Kanan asked, placing a hand on my shoulder. I looked to him and nodded, slowly letting go of Cody and standing up with Kanan’s help.

“I’m okay now. Thank you for your help,” I said and Kanan smiled, pulling me in to a hug.

“Anytime. You would do the same for me,” He replied and Hera walked into the room and pulled me in for a hug too.

“Get some rest (Y/N), we’ll be meeting up with the fleet soon. And I think Ahsoka will be there,” Hera said and Cody lit up at the mention of his Aunt.

“We’re meeting up with Auntie Ahsoka?” He asked, beaming from ear to ear. Kanan and Hera smiled and brought Cody in for a hug, enjoying the child like innocence that Cody displayed.

“We will be soon enough,” Hera replied and Cody jumped coming over to me and giving me a hug. I smiled at my son, happy to see him excited. I then looked to Kanan and Hera who shared a happy look, Kanan wrapping his arm around her.

“Come on kiddo, let’s let your mom get some sleep okay?” Kanan said and Cody nodded but didn’t let go right away. I smiled down at my boy and kissed his forehead, scratching his head a little.

“I’ll be okay Cody, you go hang out with the crew. I’m just going to lay down for a little longer,” I said and Cody nodded, pulling away from our hug slowly. I smiled at him as he left the room with Kanan, Hera staying behind for another minute. She turned to me, giving me a look I know all to well.

“I know Hera. But I can’t help it. He was my first love and it’s still painful,” I said and Hera nodded, pulling me into a hug.

“I know it is but you’ll have to tell him eventually,” She said and I sighed, nodding because I knew she was right. I just didn’t want to think back to that day. Hera pulled away from the hug and placed her hand on my shoulder.

“Get some rest. Someone will come get you when we rendezvous with the fleet,” Hera said and I nodded, watching as she walked out and the door slid closed behind her.

I sighed and moved back towards my cot, sitting on the edge and wrapping a blanket around myself. I sat there, deep in thought. Thinking about my beloved while trying not to think about the last time we saw one another. My eyes began to water as I recalled the day we were forced to part.

~Flashback~

“Cyar’ika~” Rex said in a quiet, sing song voice as my eyes squinted, the sun light coming through the curtains of my room and illuminating the room. I smiled and kept my eyes closed, not wanting this moment to end. Rex wrapped his arms around me and pulled me back towards him, kissing my neck and shoulders. I giggled a little and stretched, taking a deep breath before turning to face my love.

Rex smiled at me as I turned around, loosening his hold to let me flip over and face him. Once I was facing him, he took the opportunity to kiss my lips. I smiled into the kiss and held his face, not wanting the moment to end.

“Good morning Rex~” I said quietly, smiling as we pulled away from the kiss. Rex kissed my forehead before pulling back to look at me.

“Good morning Cyar’ika,” He said and held me a little tighter. We stayed like that for a little longer, talking quietly with one another and laughing about whatever we found on the holonet. Our joyful atmosphere was shattered by the beeping of Rex’s comlink. Rex groaned and tried to bury his face into my neck, not wanting to leave this moment.

After a minute of the com going off it stopped and we both breathed a sigh. Before it started going off again cause us both to groan. Rex finally picked it, his arm still wrapped around me as he answered the person in the other end.

“Captain Rex here,” He said and there was a chuckle on the other end. Rex rolled his eyes with a smile before repeating himself, just for appearance sake.

“Rex, my man. We’ve got a new mission,” Anakin voice came over the com, playful yet serious as always. Rex groaned and buried his face in my neck, hearing Anakin laugh from the comlink.

“Do we have to?” Rex said like a child cause me to burst out laughing. Anakin was historically laughing as well, not being able to keep his composure.

“Yes we do Captain. You’ve got one more hour until we leave,” Anakin said and Rex nodded to himself.

“Of course General,” He replied, wanting to savour the next hour.

“Hey (Y/N)!” Anakin added with a chuckle.

“Hi Anakin,” I replied, still trying to catch my breath.

“I hope you’re taking good care of my captain,” He said and Rex groaned while I laughed again.

“He’s in good hands Skywalker, no need to worry,” Anakin laughed again and shook his head.

“Alright, I believe. We’ll see you when we get back from our mission,” Anakin said. I nodded and gave Rex a kiss on the cheek as he sat there in embarrassment.

“Alrighty Skywalker. Be safe and tell Obi-wan I say hello,” I replied and Anakin responded with a “will do!” Before the line cut out. Once I was sure the com was off I burst into giggles again, holding my stomach as Rex pouted with a small smile.

Anakin knew of our relationship and besides Padme, and my commander, no one knew. Though I’m pretty sure my captain and ARC Trooper do. If so, they haven’t said anything to my other men which I’m thankful for. We wanted to keep it that way but because Anakin and I were such close friends it was obvious that we would tell him when our relationship started. He always teased Rex but he knew how to keep quiet around his other men, not wanting any of them to accidentally say anything to anyone else.

“You’re so cute Rex.” I said and his cheeks turned pink, still not used to being complimented even after being together for two years. He sat up and stretched, scratching the back of his head. I sat up as well and crawled over to him, draping my arms over his shoulders. He smiled and held my arms as I kissed his neck. He groaned quietly and tilted his head to the side, giving me a little more room. I smirked against his neck as I bit down softly, drawing a moan from him.

“Cyar’ika~” he growled and I smirked before pulling away, dodging his attempt to grab me. I laughed and stood up as he reached for me again, smirking a little.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish Cyare~” he growling, managing to grab my arm and pull me back to the bed, maneuvering us so he was on top with me pinned beneath him.

I sighed as he leaned down and kissed me, his tongue finding its way into my mouth. I groaned as he kissed down to my neck, returning the bite I gave to him. My back arched as he left a few more marks on my chest.

“R-Rex~” I stuttered out as he let go of my arms, moving down and holding my hips as he stared at me. I looked down at him and watched as he smirked, pulling my panties to the side and licking a strip up my pussy. My head fell back against the pillows and my hand found its way to his buzzed head.

“Fuck~” I whimpered as he did it again, and again and again. I was putty in his hands. I tugged on his arm, hoping to get him back up to me. He understood what I wanted and sat up, removing my panties as I removed my shirt. He quickly stripped himself of his blacks, wanting the same thing I did.

I helped him with his shirt and once it was over his head and on the floor, I pulled him down for heated kiss. He reciprocated immediately, fumbling slightly before he positioned his cock at my cunt. He pushed in quickly, breaking the kiss as we both moaned at the amazing feeling.

He began thrusting fast, gripping my hips as he went, pounding me into the bed. I moaned his name over and over, relishing in the feeling of him inside me.

“Fuckkk you feel so good around me cyar’ika~” he groaned and lifted my legs over his shoulders, his cock reaching even deeper. I threw my head back and screamed, thankful I had a soundproof apartment away from the temple. My hands gripped the sheets, feeling myself squirt and cum before the blissful feeling set in. Rex groaned and kept thrusting, even with his bottom half soaked in my juices.

“Re-Rex!” I cried out as he managed to get me to cum again. Or was it just a continuation of my first orgasm? I couldn’t tell as I felt Rex empty himself inside me, his cock pulsing for a minute more before it finally began to get soft.

We panted, our heart beating fast but together, our breathing syncing up the exact same way. He gently let my legs go, easing them down to the bed and leaning over me to give me a keldabe kiss. I smiled and wrapped my arms around him as he withdrew his cock from inside me.

“That felt amazing cyare~” he whispered and I nodded, leaning in and giving him a proper kiss, he returned it just as sweetly, smiling into it as I gave him a squeeze. We both pulled away, content in the moment before we were interrupted once again, this time by my commlink going off.

Rex groaned as I giggled, reaching over and answering the com.

“(L/N) here?” I answered and there was snickering from the other side before a stern voice shushed it.

“General. We have a briefing in an hour before we ship out,” My Clone commander Chomp said and there was more snickering. I laughed and shook my head, bringing my hand up to scratch Rex’s head. He went limp in my arms, practically purring into my neck while still trying to keep quiet.

“Alright Chomp. I’ll be there soon. And Manik and Spike know I can hear them laughing right?” I asked him, listening as my captain and Arc trooper burst out into even louder laughter. I could feel Chomp rolling his eyes as he scolded his younger brothers.

“That’s enough you too. Or I increase your daily work out,” He barked and the other two calmed down, managing to stand at attention while still smiling.

“Fine by me sir. Maybe that means we can find a beautiful dala like our Ori’vod has,” Spike said. I could sense their smiles as they thought about it, causing me to laugh.

“Alright you di’kuts. Enough. What our general does in her personal time is none of our business. Now if you two want to enjoy your shore leave after our mission I suggest you zip it,” Chomp said sternly and Manik and Spike finally shut up. I was laughing hysterically and I could feel Rex trying to hold his laughter as well.

“I’ll see you guys soon,” I said quickly and cut the comms. Rex and I sat there for a moment before we busted out laughing, both of us not being able to hold it in. Finally after another ten minutes of laying down, we both got up and got dressed, making sure that the marks we gave one another were not visible.

I helped Rex adjust his armour, making sure nothing was pinching his skin. He in turn helped me straighten out my robes, laying them in place expertly as if they had not been haphazardly thrown on the floor the night before. We smiled at each other and gave one final kiss before Rex had to leave.

“Hopefully this war will be over soon and we can escape to another planet,” I said and Rex nodded in agreement.

“Soon cyar’ika. Hopefully soon. And then we can start a family,” He evened and I blushed, knowing exactly what Rex was thinking. He smirked and pulled me in for another heated kiss before I had to push him away, not wanting to get caught up in the moment and carried away.

“Oh don’t worry ner alor’ad. You will have all the time in the world to see me pregnant. I promise you that,” I said and Rex buried his face in my neck and groaned.

“Speak like that and you’ll give me a hard on again,” He said and I could feel the smallest amount of pressure from his codpiece. I laughed and hugged him, not wanting the moment to end.

We pulled away from one another before Rex reached into one of the pouches on his belt and pulled out a necklace. My eyes went wide as I stared at it, the piece of jewelry simple yet gorgeous. Rex smiled sheepishly at me and he held it up, looking between the necklace and me. It was a silver chain with a small pendant, a sapphire gem in the middle with smaller diamond as around it.

“Rex…” I breathed out and he smiled.

“I wanted to get you something nice. I had a little help because we clones don’t make money but I want you to have something to remind you of me,” He said and I slowly reached for the necklace, Rex letting it rest in my hands. It had more weight on it than it looked and I wondered what it was made of. I ran my thumb over the gem before turning the pendant over, a gasp leaving lips as I stared at the jaig eyes engraved on the back.

“Oh Rex…” I whispered and he smiled an innocent smile at me.

“I-it’s made of beskar so you can wear it in the field and not worry about it falling off,” Rex said and I was still at a loss for words. He slowly took the necklace from my hands and walked around me, situating himself behind me.

I stood still ask Rex placed the necklace around my neck fastening the clip and adjusting it so that it was comfortable. I reached my hand up to feel the necklace, the slight weight on my neck comforting. I smiled as I turned to face him, wrapping my arms around his neck and hiding my face in his neck. His arms wrapped around me, giving me a gentle squeeze as we stayed there for what felt like an eternity. Finally we pulled away from one another and giggled together.

“Thank you Rex. It’s absolutely beautiful,” I breathed and Rex smiled.

“You’re worth it to me my love. It wasn’t easy but I called in a few favours.” He said and I smiled as I went in for another hug. “Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum Cyar’ika,” Rex said and I smiled as he gave me a Keldabe kiss.

“Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum ner Alor’ad. Be safe please,” I replied and Rex smiled, letting go and making his way to the door and out first, trying not to raise suspicion. He turned back to give me one more smile and a tiny salute before he disappeared out the door. I sighed as I was left to my own devices for a short time before I made my way out, taking my fighter and flying to the temple.

~Time Skip~

“General! We’ve just received word from general Kenobi! He has engaged General Gervious on Utapau,” Commander Chomp informed me as we wrapped up our own battle on the surface of Vassek.

“Very good commander. Let’s clean up here and get back to Coruscant. I want a celebratory drink for the end of the war!” I said and Chomp laughed, Manik and Spike joining in as they came up to us.

Just then my com went off and I excused myself to take the call.

“(L/N) here?” I said and I heard a small sigh of relief from the other end, a smiling gracing my face as I felt Rex’s relief.

“Just checking in on you. I heard about your battle and wanted to make sure you were okay,” he said and I smiled at his concern.

“No need to worry about me Rex. Takes a lot more than a few droids to take me down. How about you? How is everything in your campaign?” I asked and heard Rex take in a deep breathe before exhaling.

“U-um well, everything on Anaxes has been dealt with...” Rex said, a little hesitation in his voice. That concerned me because Rex was never this hesitant to talk about his missions before.

“What’s wrong Rex?” I ask softly and I heard another sigh.

“We found something on Anaxes that led us to Skako Minor and we…” before I could finish, I gasped.

“Skako minor?? Like home of the Techno Union Skako Minor??” I questioned, my heart pounding, wondering what could be so important that they had to go to the heart of the Techno Union.

“Yeah that one,” Rex said let out a small huffed laugh. I rolled my eyes and moved a little further away from my men.

“Rex it’s not funny. You could have been captured or at worse killed! Who okayed this mission? The council surely wouldn’t so I’m assuming Anakin didn’t have offi-” my rambling was cut off my Rex telling me something that I knew I couldn’t be mad at him for.

“Cyar’ika, Echo’s alive,” He breathed and my eyes widened, shock riddling my body. I had no words. I knew how much Echo’s death had affected my Captain and Fives when he was still here but to hear that he was alive was a shock and a relief.

“H-he is?” I whispered and I could feel Rex’s smile.

“He’s alive. Altered both physically and mentally but he is back with us,” Rex said then went on to explain what happened in full detail. He ended off by telling me that Echo had chosen to go with Clone Force 99 or The Bad Batch.

“That’s good. He is in good hands with Hunter and the others. Though I’m sure it will take Crosshair a while to warm up to him,” I chuckled and Rex laughed.

“Yeah, he’s a tough one to crack. But I’m sure Echo will be okay,” Rex said and I nodded, trying my best to reach Rex through the force and surround him with comfort.

“Thank you Cyar’ika,” He whispered and I smiled, knowing that I had reached him.

“Where are you now?” I asked and I heard a short intake of breath.

“I-I’m on Mandalore with half the 501st and the 332nd,” he said and once again I was dumbfounded before Rex went on to explain why. He explained how Ahsoka was back as well and how she was helping Bo Katan Kryze reclaim her home from Darth Maul. All of this information was overwhelming but I was just happy Ahsoka was alive and well.

“Tell her I say hello and to protect my captain,” I said and smiled, Rex letting out a short chuckle in return.

“I will. She is very happy for us and has promised not to let it slip,” Rex said and I gasped.

“You told her already?” I said and I could feel Rex’s embarrassment.

“Well, not really. She was my second in command for 2 years and she can read me like a book so it was pretty obvious to her,” Rex defended himself and I thought for a moment before nodding.

“I don’t know why I’m surprised, she was always a very perceptive Jedi,” I said and I couldn’t feel Rex nodding.

“Anyway, I have to go. We’re transporting Maul to Coruscant now,” Rex said quickly, I guess making sure no one knew who he was speaking to.

“Will do alor’ad. We just finished up here so we will also be making our way back to Coruscant. The next time I see you the war will be over,” I said with a big smile, happy that I could finally leave the order with Rex so that we could start a life together.

“Definitely cyare. Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum and I will see you back on Coruscant,” Rex said and I smiled even more.

“Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum Alor’ad,” I said and the transmission cut. I smiled and pocketed my com before making my way back over to my men, who were all loaded up in the gun ship and ready to head out.

~Time Skip~

We had been in hyper space for about an hour now when I felt an immense pain in my chest, like my heart had been grabbed and squeezed. I collapsed on the bridge, Chomp moving over to my side.

“General! Are you alright?” He asked and my head began to throb. I couldn’t answer him. I didn’t hear what else was said. The words being said sounded like they were being run through a blender. I felt our cruiser leave hyperspace but everything was still a blur.

“General can you hear me?” Chomps voice finally became a little clearer, though I could feel something terrible coming.

“Ready my ship and release my hyperspace ring. Disable tracking and divert power to the engines,” I practically whispered but my commander didn’t question it and order for a few troops to do as I asked.

“What’s happening (Y/N)?” Chomp whispered as he helped me up, Manik and Spike coming to my side as well.

“Something terrible is coming. And I need to be far away from here when it does,” I said and took a deep breath, trying to regain my strength.

“What’s coming general?” Spike said, a small note of fear in his voice. I looked at my three most trusted men, thinking about everything we had been through together.

“Come with me, the three of you. We haven’t much time,” I said and quickly began walking off the bridge and to the medbay. Chomp, Manik and Spike quickly followed, concerned for me but also curious as to what was happening.

When we made it to the medbay I ordered all personnel out, not giving anyone a chance to argue before they were ushered out by my men and the door sealed.

“(Y/N) please. What is going on?” Manik said and before I could answer, another wave of pain shot through me causing me to faulter, my head was pounded and I could hear screaming that was not my owe. I could hear master Windu, master Fisto and other masters being slaughtered. I shook my head and turned on the MRI scanner, making quick work.

“Take off your helmets and jam all transmissions to your commlinks and the cruiser. Someone is trying to turn you against me,” I said quickly as the machine powered on.

“General what is happening? Please talk to us!” Spike said and I turned to look at my men as they did what I instructed.

“I don’t know exactly what is happening Spike but I know something is wrong. I can feel it in the force and I need you three to trust me please,” I pleaded with them, going up and holding Spikes face in my hands. All three exchanged looks before nodding, Chomp stepping up first and laying on the scanner.

I started the machine and after a few minutes I found something that I had feared. A chip that shouldn’t be there. I remember Rex telling me about something like this around the time that five was killed but I didn’t take him seriously. Now I regret it.

“What is it (Y/N)?” Spike said as he an Manik came up to my side. The machine produced the chip, encased in glass to avoid contamination.

“A ‘behavioural chip’. I put that in quotes because it is something far worse than that. What it is I do not know but I need to remove yours as well. Quickly,” I said as the scanner released Chomp. He didn’t wake right away but I hauled him up and sat him against the adjacent wall, ushering Manik to the scanner.

There was no protest from as he went under. The same thing happened and once again I laid him up against the wall next to Chomp. Spike was the last to go, still a little hesitant even after seeming his brothers go through it.

“Are you sure about this general?” Spike asked and I nodded before feeling another wave of pain. The voices were much louder and I could hear Anakin screaming, I could feel Master Windu in pain and I could feel a sinister presence rising. My ears were ringing and my head pounding as I collapsed, screaming in pain myself, Spike got off the table to be by my side but I shook my head, trying to convey to him that he had to go through the procedure quickly.

Before I could really process what was happening, Spikes helmet was activated and a hologram of a dark figure appeared. I could feel dread take over my body as I watched the cloaked figure speak.

“Arc Trooper Spike. It is time-”

Execute Order 66

The words rang out through the Medbay, Spike going rigid before his shoulders squared. My eyes were wide, my ears not being able to process what was being said.

“It will be done my lord,” Spike replied before moving away from me and scooped up his bucket, placing it on his head before raising his blaster at me.

“Jedi. You are in direct violation of Order 66. You are to be terminated immediately for treason against the galactic republic,” Spike said and my heart dropped, looking over to my Commander and Captain who were still unconscious.

“I don’t want to hurt you Spike,” I whispered as I knelt there, still in disbelief. A shot went off but my lightsaber was in my hand before I could register what was happening, the bolt being deflected and hitting the wall near by.

“SPIKE!” I screamed as a firefight ensued, Spike firing at me and me deflecting what I could. “Spike please! It’s (Y/N)! Your friend!” I continued, trying but failing to get through to my trooper.

“I am not friends with Jedi traitors!” He screamed back and drew his pistols, firing at me twice as fast. I tried to dodge all his shots but one got me in the shoulder causing me to drop my saber.

I screamed in pain as I went down, clutching my injured shoulder with my good hand. Spike walked up to me and aimed his pistol right between my eyes, the look on his face one of no emotion or remorse. I closed my eyes and bowed my head, reaching out to Rex through the force with one final I love you before breaking our bond.

When Rex and I had begun dating, I had created a force bond with him. Even if he was not a force sensitive being, it was possible. And I melded our signatures together, giving him a piece on myself and he did the same to me. Breaking the bond was like shattering my heart, ripping it in half and throwing it aside.

I screamed as I did it, my sorrow creating a ripple effect that sent Spike flying across the room. He landed with a thud before dropping his pistols, laying unconscious on the ground. I could feel how the ripple had affected the ship as a whole, everyone on board being faced with an ear-piercing scream.

I knelt there sobbing as I finally felt the weight of what I did, holding onto my chest as the pain became too much. I could feel an emptiness in my chest, like a hole from a blaster. I didn’t even register that someone was trying to talk to me. The next thing I remember in being carried in someone’s arms, feeling cold before feeling warm again. I blacked out after that.

~Time Skip~

I woke to a gentle humming, feeling the weight of something on top of me and my eyes began to open. I felt a soft blanket on top of me and a pillow under my head, my body lying on a firm surface. I looked to my right, being met with a wall before looking to my left and seeing the inside of a ship. Across the small hull of the shuttle, I could see Spike laying there, a bandage on the right side of his head with his hair cut to accommodate it. I sighed a small sigh of relief, knowing that my Arc trooper was okay. I slowly sat up, clutching my chest as I did. The pain was still there, feeling even deeper than before. I cried out, finally processing what I had done. I had done it to protect Rex. I did not want him to feel my death. I did not want him to feel the pain of that loss.

Little did I know, he felt it ten-fold.

My cries reached the cockpit and Manik came running to me, checking me over to make sure I wasn’t physically hurt.

“General! Are you alright?” He asked quietly. I shook my head and broke down even more, not wanting to believe that I had really severed my connection with Rex.

“It hurts Manik. It hurts so much,” I whispered and clung my battalion captain, not wanting this to be real but knowing all to well that it was.

“What hurts?” He asked and I clutched my chest.

“My heart. My head. I feel like a part of me is missing,” I continued in a hushed voice, not knowing if I could speak any louder.

“Oh general,” Manik said and held me, knowing that something happened but not wanting to pry. We both heard a groan from the other side of the hull, looking over to see Spike waking up. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, before they went wide and he whipped his head around to take in his surroundings. When his eyes landed on me, he leapt up, making the short walk over to where I was and pulling me into a strong hug.

“Su cuy’gar,” He whispered to me and I nodded. I could feel his tears on my shoulder as I hugged him back.

“Yeah,” Was all I said before Chomp came from the cockpit.

“Thank god you two are awake,” he said and came over to the three of us, pulling us all into a group hug. I smiled a little, still feeling the emptiness in my heart. I sniffled and Chomp held onto us tightly, the weighted of the last few hours finally registering for us all.

“What happened?” I asked quietly as the four of us pulled away from the hug. Chomp sighed as he helped me stand, Manik and Spike following suit and we all made our way to the cockpit. Chomp sat in the pilot’s chair, Manik taking copilot and Spike and I sitting in the passenger seats.

“I woke up first, finding you and Spike unconscious on the floor. I figured something must have happened because Spike had his bucket on. I pulled up the security footage and watched everything. I almost didn’t believe what I was watching. But you saved us,” he said and Manik nodded.

“After that I got Spike into the table and finished the procedure. That’s when Manik woke up and I filled him in. He put you on the other one and scanned to make sure you weren’t hurt,” Chomp continued and Manik nodded again, looking a me with a small smile. I was grateful to my men for helping one another but also helping me.

“After I got Spike’s chip out, I helped him while Manik carried you. We were questioned by so many troopers but we played it as cool as we could. Once we made it to the hanger it was too late for them to figure out what we had done and we hijacked a shuttle and booked it,” Chomp said. I was so grateful to them for getting us out of there, still trying to process everything that went on.

“Thank you for saving me,” I said and looked at my men with adoration and gratitude. The Manik and Chomp beamed at me but Spike bowed his head in shame. I turned to him and pulled him into a hug. He tensed a little before returning the hug, looking to his brother who only showed him soft smiles.

“I don’t blame you Spike. It could have happened to anyone,” I said and spoke sighed before pulling away from the hug.

“I know. But I could have killed you,” Spoke said and Chomp placed a hand on Spike’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze.

“But you didn’t Vod’ika. We saved her and the baby,” Chomp said and I froze. I slowly turned to look at Chomp before looking to Manik to confirm. Both of them tensed a little before Manik let out a forced chuckle.

“I…guess you didn’t know. Congrats general. You’re pregnant,” Manik said. My ears began ringing again as I pulled away from Spike and looked down at my stomach. My hands instinctively went to my stomach where, true to their word, I could sense the life growing inside me. How I hadn’t before was beyond me but I guess I never really paid much attention to it. I knew it was Rex’s baby, and that thought made my eyes water all over again.

Chomp stood up and pulled me into a hug, letting me cry on his shoulder. “It’s okay general. I’m sure Rex is okay. He’s to tough to let some chip get the best of him. What we need to do now is find a safe place to lay low and help you get ready for this baby,” Chomp said and the others agreed. I nodded and sat back down in my seat, letting Chomp, Manik and Spike take the lead.

From there everything changed. The war had ended and the Jedi were deemed traitors. They were hunted and killed; any clones who went against the order were taken to an unknown place. Chomp, Spike, Manik and I had found refuge on an independent world, the three of them helping me through the Woah’s of pregnancy the best they could. It took a long time to adjust but soon enough I had my baby. And I named him Cody after commander Cody.

Sooner or later, I came into contact with Ahsoka again. She had told me that she and Rex had survived but after a few months together she lost contact with him. I was devastated that I would not get to see him again but at least I knew he was alive for the moment. Ahsoka came and met my son, falling in love at the first sight of him. I smiled as she told me more about what happened to her during the order.

It was a difficult conversation but one that needed to be had. As the days passed, my men began going on missions of their own to find and free their brothers, moving from planet to planet trying to make a difference. I stayed at our “home” with my son, trying to raise him as best I could. As he grew, I saw more and more of Rex in him. His eyes, his smile, his hair. He was a little copy of Rex and he loved his uncles very much. I came across Kanan a few years later, welcoming him with open arms.

~End Flashback~

From there the rest is history. Spike, Chomp and Manik checked in often but they were doing their own thing now.

I always think back; the last time I spoke to Rex it was telling him how I love him and how we would run away together and have a big family. I do have a family but it still feels incomplete with him. I’m just happy I told him I love him one last time.

My eyes watered even more as I thought about it, my heart hurting and my head pulsating. I took some more deep breaths before I laid back down, shutting my eyes and trying to get a little more sleep.

~ A few Hours Later ~

I felt someone gently shaking me awake, their presence calming and warm. I smiled and I help the hand of whoever came to get me, knowing instantly that it was Ahsoka.

“Rise and shine (Y/N). There is work to be done,” she said softly and I groaned, not wanting to get up. Ahsoka laughed before I felt a weight on my chest, snuggling into me. I smiled a little more as my arms wrapped around Cody, holding him tightly to me.

“You doing okay mom? I could hear you mumbling and sniffling in your sleep,” Cody asked and I opened my eyes to look at him, seeing Rex reflected in his eyes. I nodded as I scratched his head, giving him a kiss on the forehead.

“I’m okay ner ad,” I said and slowly sat up white Cody’s help, bringing my hand up to my chest. I could feel a dull pain in my heart, the same one I always got when I thought of my Rex. Ahsoka noticed and placed a hand on my shoulder before giving it a gentle squeeze. I looked up at her with a small smile, noting just how much she had grown up.

“Come on. Everyone is on the bridge of the command ship. We’ve got a new mission for you,” Ahsoka said with a hesitate smile. I paid no mind to it as we both had a lot on our minds and plates. I stood up, my arms staying wrapped around Cody as the three of us made our way to Phoenix home.

~Small Time Skip~

“The destruction of our command ship has severely limited our ability to fight the empire in this sector,” Commander Sato said as Ezra and Kanan came into the bridge of Phoenix home.

I stood next to Ahsoka against one of the adjacent walls, holding onto Cody as Commander Sato spoke.

“So maybe we don’t fight,” Ezra said sheepishly when commander Sato gave him a stern look. “Uhhh... commander Sato sir. W-when things got tough for me on Lothal, I’d go find some place to hide,” He continued, using hand gestures to convey his point and I giggled a little, remembering how Rex used to do the same thing.

“You are never shy with your opinions, Ezra Bridger,” Sato shot back, not really amused by Ezra’s words. “But establishing a base is a good idea,” Sato said and Ahsoka smiled, as if to agree but also there was something more in her eyes. I didn’t question it, just holding onto Cody and keeping quiet.

“Problem is, none of the potential bases we know of have the tactical advantage we need to protect what’s left of our fleet,” Hera said with her hands on her hips, concern evident in her voice.

“Or, aid the nearby systems suffering from imperial oppression,” Kansan said as he made his way behind Hera, the Twi’lek turning around to give him a look.

“We can’t help others if we can’t help ourselves Kanan,” Hera said, her voice conveying that it should be an obvious thought. “If only we had more allies,” Hera finished, turning back to the console.

“I know someone, who might be able to help us,” Ahsoka spoke up, hands on her hips and her tone of voice indicated to me that she was hiding something. I looked at her quizzically, but she didn’t not look at me, though she seemed to know I was staring at her. Cody looked up at me and held my hand, trying to send a wave of reassurance through the force.

“A great military commander with vast knowledge of the Outer Rim,” she said and my eyes went slightly wide. My mind went to Rex but I knew that could be possible. Ahsoka wouldn’t keep that from me. Would she?

Cody felt me tense and I couldn’t feel Kanan give me a look as my signature changed slightly, turning from calm to anxious before turning back. Cody turned around and hugged me, whispering to ask me what was wrong. I reassured my son that everything was okay, trying not to let him see my inner turmoil.

“He could assist us in finding a base, and his experienced leadership would make him a powerful ally,” Ahsoka said, moving away from the wall she stood by, making her way over to the holotable. Everyone’s eyes followed her, intrigued by her words. I stayed silent, trying not to let my intrusive thoughts overwhelm me.

“How do we recruit this…leader?” Sato asked, sounding just as much intrigued as he was cautious.

“That’s the problem. I lost track of him a long time ago, and all my transmissions have gone unanswered,” she said and stood there, arms crossed and one holding her chin in thought.

“We can find him. Let us try,” Ezra said optimistically, wanting to do what he could to help the cause.

“Well, there is one option I’ve not yet attempted,” Ahsoka said and smirked, giving Ezra a look before exiting the bridge.

~Small Time Skip~

The Ghost crew was back on board the ship, everyone making their way to the bridge for Ahsoka’s ‘test’. I sent Cody with Ezra and Sabine, making my way to my room to meditate. I had a feeling I knew what Ahsoka was planning but I didn’t want to believe it.

He’s gone. Even if he is alive, you severed your bond. You lost the right to call him yours.

My thoughts swirled as I sat on the floor of mine and Cody’s cabin, trying desperately to get my emotions under control.

~On the bridge~

Chopper beeped out that he had a bad feeling about this, moving away from one of the consoles as the rest of the crew came on. Hera was preparing the Ghost to receive the information when Ahsoka made her way into the cockpit. She was carrying a droid head, smiling softly at Cody’s small exclamation of wonder.

“Is that…the head of an old tactical droid?” Kanan asked, amazed and sceptical.

“These droids were great at finding things, calculating,” Ahsoka said as she handed the head off to Sabine. She scoffed slightly as she thought back to the Clone Wars. “Found my master and I a few times when we didn’t want to be found,” She finished, looking at Kanan before looking to Sabine and Ezra.

“How in all the galaxy is that droid gonna find your friend?” Ezra asked, leaning over towards Sabine to get a better look at the droid head. After Ezra’s question, he, Hera and Sabine all looked to Ahsoka, all wondering the same thing.

Chopper beeped and looked over at Ezra sassily, putting his mechanical arms on his “hips”.

“Well,” Ahsoka started, looking at Ezra to answer his question. “I heard he was last seen in the Seelos system.” She said and turned back towards the door to the cockpit. “You can start there.” She finished.

“You’re not coming with us?” Cody asked and stood up, reaching for Ahsoka.

Ahsoka smiled at the young boy and ruffled his hair before pulling him into a hug. “Not on this mission Cody,” she said and Cody pouted a little, not wanting to let go of his aunt just yet. After another minute he let Ahsoka go.

“I have something else to attend to,” She replied and looked at Ezra over her shoulder.

“The Sith Lord,” Kanan said, no question needed as to what Ahsoka was looking for. This conversation was one that needed to be had with (Y/N) present so Kanan turned to Cody.

“Cody where’s your mom?” Kanan asked softly, placing a hand on the young boy’s shoulder. Cody looked at Kanan before looking to the door leading out of the cockpit.

“She went to our room. I don’t think she’s feeling very well,” Cody said and looked to Kanan then Ahsoka. Both gave each other a look that Cody noticed.

“What’s wrong?” Cody said and Ahsoka sighed before giving Cody a small smile.

“It’s nothing ad’ika. Your mom will be okay.” Ahsoka said. Cody looked at her sceptically for a moment before dropping it. Kanan took his hand off Cody’s shoulder, giving the young boy a smile.

“I’m going to check on her,” Cody said and before anyone could protest, he made his way out of the cockpit and to the cabin he shared with his mother.

~The Ghost Crew~

“There are questions, questions that need answering,” Ahsoka said and looked at Kanan over her other shoulder.

“I wish we could go with you,” Ezra expressed, feeling a little disappointed that he, Kanan and (Y/N) couldn’t go with her to get answers about the Sith Lord.

“You have your own mission, Ezra,” she said and turned back to fully look at him and the rest of the crew before turning and addressing Kanan.

“And Kanan, if you find my friend, you must trust him,” Ahsoka said sternly which caused Ezra to look at her with concern.

“If he’s all the things you say, we can’t afford not to,” Kanan said with a hint of sarcasm, smirking at Ahsoka before it vanished. He could tell she was being serious.

“Trust him, and listen to (Y/N),” Ahsoka repeated again, emphasizing her point as the cockpit doors closed.

“What was that about?” Ezra asked Kanan

“I have no idea,” Kanan said exasperatedly.

~Reader~

Cody opened the door to the cabin, the sight that greeted him was one that hurt his heart. His mother sat there on her cot, tears slowly trailing down her face as she turned something over in her hand.

“Buir?” Cody asked and I looked up at him, startled by his sudden appearance.

“Cody,” I said as I wiped my tears, trying to compose myself for my son. “What’s up kiddo? I thought you were in the cockpit with the rest of the crew,” I asked and Cody walked in, making sure to close the door and lock it behind him as he came and sat on my cot.

“Talk to me mom. Please? There is obviously something on your mind and I want to help in anyway I can,” Cody said quietly and leaned his head on my shoulder. I tensed for a moment before letting out a shaky sigh, taking Cody’s hand in mine.

“I was thinking about your father,” I said softly, lifting my head and tilting it back, trying not to tear up again, Cody looked at me with wide eyes, knowing that this was a topic that I had only talked about a handful of times.

“What about dad?” He asked and I let a ghost of a smile grace my face.

“He was my world. He was everything to me,” I started and Cody turned his full attention to listen, knowing this might be the only time he gets to hear about his father in depth.

“We met at the start of the war. I was the general of a different battalion but we worked closely with the 501st legion. That’s how I met your father, Rex. I knew Anakin, the 501st legions general, because he and I were best friends. I was one of the first people to welcome him when he came to the temple. Anakin was always confident and cocky. He was an amazing friend and when he introduced me to Rex, it was love at first sight. It was against the Jedi code for Jedi to form attachments and it was against regulations for clones to fall in love, much less with a Jedi. We couldn’t be together but we didn’t care. We started our relationship around the one year mark of the war and we had remained in contact ever since. I got my own apartment outside of the temple so that Rex and I could spend time together, away from prying eyes. We made it work very well. We had our ups and downs as all couples do but we remained united,” I said and uncurled my hand, revealing the necklace Rex had given me.

“This was a gift to me from your father. He gave it to me the last time we saw each other face to face before the end of the war. It wasn’t easy for him to get but he told me I was worth it,” Cody’s mouth formed oh shape, finally knowing the meaning and value of the necklace he had seen many times.

“It’s the last piece of your father I have, besides you,” I finished and looked at the necklace in my hand, running my thumb over the sapphire gem just as I did all those years ago. Cody took my hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

“What happened to him?” Cody asked tentatively and I sighed, knowing that this time would come.

“I don’t know. I lost contact with him when the war ended. I severed our bond,” I said and Cody gasped. He knew what that meant, having been taught about force bonds by Ahsoka, Kanan and myself. He let go of my hand and instead gave me a hug, hiding his face in my neck to comfort me. I sighed as I hugged my son close, tears falling once again as I thought more about Rex.

“Is that why you get random chest pains whenever you think about dad?” Cody asked quietly and I nodded, feeling him hold me a little tighter.

“I broke our bond because I thought I was going to die. When order 66 was given, I thought I was dead. And I didn’t want Rex to feel that pain so I thought it would be easier to sever our connection. But I didn’t die. Uncle Chomp and Uncle Manik saved me and Uncle Spike. They made sure I was taken care of until you came and they stuck around to help me raise you. I always thought your father died. I always assumed he did because it made it easier to move on. It sounds cruel I know, but I needed to be strong for you ner ad,” I said and Cody pulled away from the hug to look at me.

“I’m sure he’s out there somewhere mom. We’ll find him. I promise,” Cody said with a fierce determination, making me smile with watery eyes. “Remember my vision from earlier?” Cody asked and I nodded.

“That’s how I know he’s alive and I’m sure he’s waiting for you to find him. He’s waiting to reunite with you. I can feel it,” Cody said passionately and I looked down at my lap, thinking about Cody’s words.

“You remind me so much of your father and I couldn’t be prouder of you, ner ad,” I said and Cody smiled, giving me another hug. When we pulled away, he took the necklace from my hand and crawled on my bed behind me, placing the necklace back in its rightful place. I smiled and wiped my tears as Cody came back around in front of me.

“We’ll find him mom. Don’t worry. If what you told me is true, he’s a fighter and he wouldn’t go down that easy,” Cody said and I nodded, a soft ‘okay’ leaving my lips. Cody gave me a kiss on the cheek before grabbing his lightsaber from one of the storage drawers, and taking my hand. He pulled me up and began leading us to the cockpit. I hadn’t realized how much time had passed since the briefing but it had been a little while because we were in hyperspace.

The door whooshed opened and all eyes turned to me and Cody, Kanan standing up and coming over to give me a hug.

“You feel better?” He asked and I nodded, placing my hand on Cody’s head and fluffing his hair.

“Mommmm,” Cody whined and I laughed, the others laughing as well.

“Where are we headed?” I asked and looked to Hera for an answer.

“The Seelos system. That’s where Ahsoka said to start,” Hera responded and I nodded, watching as hyperspace flew right by us.

~Time skip~

Chopper beeped out an ‘uhoh’ as the alarm started going off, one of the control panels sparking and catching fire.

“We get all the way to Seelos and now you tell me the hyperdrive wasn’t completely fixed?!” Hera growled at her droid.

Chopper beeped out sarcastically and Hera threw her arms up as I covered my mouth, trying not to laugh. Hera glared at me which made me laugh even louder.

“You finished the important repairs? How did you define “important”?!” Hera yelled as she turned back to Chopper. Kanan heard the commotion and came up from the common space on the ghost.

“What’s going on?” He asked, wondering why Hera was so mad the alarms were blaring. I laughed and got up, making my way over to Kanan.

“Chopper didn’t fix the hyperdrive properly,” I said and Kanan rolled his eyes, mumbling and ‘of course not’.

“Chopper and I are staying here,” Hera said and grunted as another fuse blew. “To clean up his mess,” She finished and Chopper chirped in protest that it wasn’t his fault.

“Take the phantom!” Hera said as she tried to get the situation under control. “Hopefully we’ll be ready to go by the time you get back,” she said sarcastically, pushing a few buttons on the control panel.

Kanan looked at her and rolled his eyes before looking at me, nodding as he slid down the ladder. I followed soon after, giving Hera a small wave as I went. I got down the ladder as everyone was making their way to the phantom, getting ready for our departure.

“You going to bring Cody?” Kanan asked and I nodded, turning towards mine and Cody’s cabin.

The door opened to reveal my son, lying on the upper cot, a smile on his sleeping face. I smiled as I climbed up the ladder and shook his shoulder gently, coxing him from his sleep.

“Cody? Time to get up sweetheart,” I said and Cody stirred, yawning as he looked at me.

“Hi mom,” he said and sat up, wrapping his arms around me. He buried his face in my neck, holding me a little tighter than usual.

“What’s wrong Cody?” I asked and stroked his hair. He sighed and pulled away before giving me a smile.

“I had another dream about dad. It was a good one.” He said and my eyes began to water.

“I’m sure it was honey. Your father was a great man. and I’m sure if he were here, he would’ve been an amazing father,” I said and Cody wiped my eyes for me.

“We’ll find him mom. He’s out there. I can feel it,” Cody said and I nodded at his optimism. I could sense it too. But I didn’t want to get my hopes up in case I was wrong for believing we were close to Rex.

“Let’s get going. We’re taking the phantom cause Chopper didn’t properly fix the hyperdrive.” I said and Cody rolled his eyes.

“Of course he didn’t,” he said and moved towards the ladder. I hopped down first before Cody followed, both of us making our way to the ladder of the Phantom and climbing up.

The phantom detached from the ghost smoothly, Kanan piloting her like a pro. I smiled as I sat with Cody across from Zeb, the Lasot making faces as Cody laughed like a young child. Zeb was like an older brother to Cody and they always had fun together, getting into trouble and teasing Ezra. It was always amusing to watch, seeing as they all grew to be like family.

Sabine held the tactical droid head in her hands and made her way over to Kanan as we flew through the atmosphere towards the surface of Seelos. I watched from where I sat, the blue sky and cracked ground making the planet seem beautiful in a deserted type of way.

Cody looked at me and I nodded before he got up and made his way over to Ezra and Kanan, Sabine plugging in the head to the computer of the phantom. It whirled for a moment as Sabine said to no one in particular, “Well, let’s fire this thing up,” She placed it on the control panel and the head began to warble. Cody was fascinated with the droid, not really having seen one as important or deadly as this one.

“I think it’s scanning for a signal of some kind,” Sabine said as she held onto the pilot’s seats, Kanan’s brows scrunching together.

“Good luck. You could really get lost out here,” Ezra said, glaring out the cockpit window towards the drab looking grounds bellow.

“Maybe that was the idea,” Zeb started, kind of throwing his arms up in the air. “What if this great commander were looking for doesn’t want to be found?” He speculated and to me, that made a lot of sense. Ezra must have thought the same thing because his face shifted from confused to cautious to understanding to curiosity as he looked out the window again.

I could sense a very familiar presence, almost like it was dancing with me. I looked down and closed my eyes, trying not to reach out but desperately wanting to.

I had closed parts of myself off from the force for years because of the grief of loosing everything I knew. It was only recently, when Cody turned 10, that I opened myself up, making my sense of the force still very wonky.

Zeb placed one of his hands on my knee, knowing that when I did this, I could feel something. Cody came over to me to and wrapped his arms around me, also feeling that something was off with me.

“What’s wrong mom?” He said and I didn’t respond, not wanting to throw myself into another panic attack. I just kept my eyes closed, taking deep breathes, tuning out everything I could, even when the tactical droid began beeping and chiming a number I had heard many times before.

“7567…7567…7,”

“It’s homing in on something,” Sabine said and she and Ezra leaned in a little more, Kanan’s brows still furrowed. Cody gave me one more gentle squeeze and went back over to Ezra, also wanting to see what was being found.

“7567,”

“7567…7567…7567,”

Zeb got up from where he sat, making his way over to the pilot’s seat and looking out the window. I stayed putting, trying my best to meditate and work through my thoughts and feelings. I could sense them. There were three life forms on the surface. Two very familiar and one I had only met a handful of times. I didn’t let myself hope though even when all the evidence was there

“There! Up ahead!” Zeb said eagerly, pushing Ezra, Sabine and Kanan a little too forcefully to get his point across. There was an old republic AT-TE walker, moving slowly across the ground. I stayed unmoving, not wanting to open my eyes.

“Whoa….” Ezra and Cody said together, both admiring the monster of a vehicle the tank was. Sabine gasped at the colourful makeshift patio that rested on top, admiring the craftsmanship of it.

“Now, that is a work of art,” she said and that made me smile a little, still in my own world.

“Looks like an old republic tank,” Kanan said cautiously, not wanting to believe who could be riding in that tank, “used during the Clone wars,” Kanan snarled as he finished his whispered words. My eyes squeezed shut even more, not wanting Kanan’s negativity to influence my thoughts.

“7567...”

The tank came to a hault as the Phantom landed towards the rear, everyone moving to exit the ship. Cody came over to me and placed a hand on my shoulder, giving it a small squeeze.

“We’re here mom,” he said quietly and I nodded, acknowledging that we had landed.

“You coming (Y/N)?” Kanan asked and I shook my head, my mind still piecing everything together. Zeb opened the hatch and led Sabine and Ezra out.

“Let’s go Cody, leave your mom to meditate. She’s going through a lot. And be on guard,” Kanan said as he ushered Cody out. He looked back at me but I kept me head down, the things I was feeling becoming overwhelming.

The hatch remained opened behind Cody and Kanan as Kanan also warned Ezra to be on guard. I could feel the force pulling me towards my past, wanting me to reflect, wanting me to open back up fully. I was afraid because I knew now what awaited me outside the door. I could feel his life force, just as strong as the day we met, still slightly fractured from the day I severed our bond.

I slowly opened my eyes as I felt a weight being lifted, the force surging through me like an old friend not forgotten. I smiled as I felt it but that smile was quickly wiped away as I heard blaster fire. I unclipped my saber from its place on my hip and opened the hatch of the phantom, ready to defend my friends on both sides.

~Outside~

The group walked up toward the tank, the makeshift windchimes ringing as the group waited. Cody made his way to the front of the group with Ezra, even against Kanan’s silent protests. The back door to the AT-TE opened to reveal three older looking men, all looking the same but also different.

Cody felt a serge in the force, one so strong it took his breath away. He held a hand to his chest as he started at the man in the front of the group. This man was familiar and Cody knew it had to be someone special. He knew this man. Zeb broke him out of his internal battle with the force by scoffing and rolling his eyes.

“It’s just a bunch of old geezers,” he said and crossed his arms.

“Well armed old geezers,” Sabine added, admiring the weaponry the men were sporting.

“What do you want?” The first man called to the group and Cody took hold of Zeb’s arm, trying to balance himself as another serge from the force took his breath again and made his heart race.

“We’re looking for someone,” Kanan said sceptically, calling back to the men.

“Well, that’s too bad, ‘cause there’s nobody out here,” The man said, leaning against the railing of the tank. Ezra stepped up, Cody moving to stand with him but still staying back. He needed to know if he was right.

“Hey, uh, does the number 7567 mean anything to you?” Ezra asked carefully, holding his hand up a little, holding Cody back from being up front.

“What did you just say?” The first man snarled, the ones flanking him raising their weapons defensively.

“Uh, I said 7567,” Ezra repeated cautiously, Cody moving from behind his hand to step up in front of the group.

“I haven’t heard those digits in…well that’s my birth number!” The man said and Cody finally took a stand as Ezra thought to himself what ‘birth number’ could mean.

“Buir?” Cody said and stared at the man in front, all three visibly tensing at the use of Mando’a and the term used. Before anything else could be said, Kanan snarled.

“They’re clones!” He said and pushed Ezra and Cody back, Cody falling with the force of it as Kanan ignited his lightsaber to defend the group.

The three men were snapped out of their shock of a child speaking Mando’a, instead turning fully defensive at the Jedi.

“Kanan, wait. Stop!” Cody yelled but Kanan didn’t listen.

“Jedi! They’ve come for revenge,” The clone with the scar over his left eye yelped and immediately began firing at Kanan.

“Drop the blaster old man,” Zeb yelled back as he and Sabine took out their weapons.

“Don’t try it boyo! I’ll gun you down,” The man in the blue shirt said in response, taking aim at the group.

“Stand down troopers. Now! That’s an order Soldier,” The front man said, pushing the others blasters towards the ground.

“Sha’kaji al’verde!” A voice boomed and everyone turned to see (Y/N), holding her (L/C) lightsaber in her hand. Cody stood up quickly and ran to his mother, wrapping his arms around her. She placed her free hand around her son but her eyes never left those of the captain.

All three men were just as shocked, their weapons dropping immediately. The rest of the Ghost crew looked at me, their weapons still slightly raised and Kanan’s saber still ignited.

“Stow your weapons,” I said to Zeb and Sabine, moving up towards the tank slowly.

“But...” Zeb began but I gave him a sharp look. Zeb backed off, knowing that when I had that look, I wasn’t playing. Sabine did the same, not wanting to be on the receiving end.

“Stow. Your. Weapons. That’s an order,” I said sternly and once they did, I turned my eyes on Kanan.

“Lower your weapon Kanan. Now,” I said in the same tone. Kanan didn’t and he turned to glare at me but my glare was just as hard, if not harder.

“You forget your place Kanan. Lower your saber now or I will have no choice but to take it,” I said, my voice dripping with venom. Zeb, Ezra and Sabine all stared in shock at my tone, knowing that I meant business.

Kanan stopped for another moment before he finally retracted his saber, placing it on his belt and backing away to give me some space. I did the same, retracting my saber and placing it back on my hip, my arm never leaving Cody as we made our way to the tank. I looked up and stared at the three fine men, Commander Wolffe, Commander Gregor and my love, Captain Rex.

All three stood there, shocked and unmoving, Rex’s eyes never leaving mine. My eyes were beginning to water and I could tell by Cody’s hold on me that he knew who this man was. I watched as Rex’s eyes flicked down from mine, noticing the necklace that I wore. The same necklace her gave to me that night in my apartment so many years ago. He then met my eyes again, still at a loss for words.

“Udes verde,” I said quietly. All three of them stood at attention before standing at ease, Rex’s mouth opening and closing like a fish. I smiled as I watched his lost for word expression, tears beginning to stream down my cheeks. Cody looked up at me and then to Rex, putting the pieces of the puzzle in the right place.

“Mom?” He asked and I saw Rex’s eyes widen even further, Wolffe and Gregor looking to the captain and then back at us.

“Su cuy’gar ner alor’ad,” I said and Rex finally took a breath, tears leaving his eyes as well.

“Ner cyar’ika,” He whispered and I nodded, giving Cody a kiss on the forehead before I let go of him, taking a step and jumping up to the platform of the tank, landing right in front of Rex as he backed up to give me room. It didn’t take a second before he was on me, holding me close and kissing me like there was not tomorrow.

I reciprocated just as quickly, holding his face in my hands and caressing his beard, smiling into the kiss. Rex smiled with me as we pulled away, leaning his forehead against mine.

“I thought I lost you, ner cyare,” Rex said tearfully and I nodded, my eyes watering just as much.

“I’ll explain it all Rex I promise,” I said and kissed him again, pulling him impossibly closer. It was as if the rest of the world didn’t exist besides the two of us at the moment, rebuilding the bond that was broken and making up for lost time. We pulled away panting, both of us laughing and crying at finally being reunited.

I turned and looked down at the rest of the crew, Sabine, Zeb and Ezra were smiling softly, giving me thumbs up and claps. Kanan stood to the back of the group, looking at Rex and then me apprehensively, but not saying anything. Cody had a huge smile on his face, finally getting to see his father.

“Come up here ner ad,” And Cody nodded, doing as I did and jumping on to the platform. Wolffe and Gregor made room as Cody hopped up, the rest of the ghost crew loading into the Phantom and lifting off, landing the ship gently on top of the AT-TE.

“Rex, my love,” I started holding Rex’s hand as Cody came up to us. Rex looked at me and then back at Cody, staring at him with wide eyes.

“He’s ours?” Rex whispered and I nodded, my eyes watering again as Rex broke out into sobs, pulling Cody in for a big hug. Cody smiled as he reciprocated the hug, holding on to his long-lost father. They stayed like that for a little longer which gave me a chance to turn around and pull Wolffe into a hug, the commander dropping his second gun and immediately returning it. Gregor came over to us and did the same, giving me a hug as Cody and Rex pulled away.

“It’s so good to see you all alive,” I said tearfully and Woffle wiped his own tears, Gregor giving a huge smile.

“You too general,” Woffle said and Gregor laughed in agreement.

“What’s your name Son?” Rex said as he knelt down so that he was a little more level with Cody. I walked over a placed a hand on Cody’s shoulder, giving him a reassuring squeeze and he smiled at me. He turned back to look at Rex and with a childlike smile her told him.

“My name is Cody (L/N),” He said proudly and Rex’s eyes went wide again as the Ghost crew dismounted from the phantom, coming to a stop around our group. Rex turned and looked at me as I smiled with teary eyes before he turned back to Cody.

“Do you know who you got your name from son?” He asked quietly and Cody nodded again.

“Commander Cody of the 212th clone battalion. A great soldier, a born leader and a great friend of my dad,” Cody said, echoing something I had told him many years ago. Rex nodded and pulled Cody into another hug, lifting him up and pulling me into a hug as well. We were a family reunited after so many years apart and I couldn’t be happier.

“Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum ner cyar’ika,” Rex said and I smiled and kissed his cheek.

“Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum ner alor’ad,” I replied and Cody smiled before he patted Rex’s shoulder to let him down. Rex did so immediately, instead latching on to me and holding me tightly as if I would disappear at any moment.

“Dad?” Cody asked and Rex responded with ‘yes Cody?’

“I want you to meet my friends,” he said and walked over to the ghost crew who at this point had been watching our reunion with smiles. Kanan still had a sour look on his face but I don’t think he could deny that I was happy. As Cody introduced Rex, Wolffe, and Gregor to the crew I couldn’t help but smile. Rex had only found out he was a father ten minutes ago and he had already taken to the role like it was natural for him.

I smiled at my family, finally reunited after so long apart. I’d have to have a word with Ahsoka about this but for now, I wanted to enjoy the moment.

—————

Thank you so much for reading! Please drop a like if you enjoyed this story and let me know if there’s anything else you’d like for me to write about!

I will try to update every week around noon on Wednesdays or Thursdays! But please be patient with me, I’m going through some health stuff as well as working so I will write and update when I can!

[wrathkitty]

Short Debts Make Long Friends - Chapter 19 (Part 3)

Chapter 19 (Part 3) - I Don't Need to See Your Face; I Just Need You to Help Me Pretend

“Tell me what you want, cyar’ika,” he urges, basking in every shallow, ragged breath and craving more. 

“You,” you pant. “All I want is you.” 

He momentarily loses his rhythm, and the phrase, “Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum,” slips from his mouth. 

Mando’a is not his native tongue, but it is only in Mando’a that his words have ever been able to flow freely. He murmurs the truth to you now, ghosting his mouth against your brow and cheeks, intermingling wickedness and wistful dreams as he tells you everything. His fantasy of his old ship but a different room and a proper bed, waiting until he is absolutely certain the kid is asleep before making love to you in the dark. Capturing your sounds of pleasure with his lips as he brings you to release, seeking his own relief deep inside you – 

“What’s all that mean – ” you gasp as he runs out of breath and stops for air, “what’s…” 

This hapless utterance ends in a quavered moan. 

“It’s a promise,” Din answers huskily, voice roughening. He knows what you are asking, but right now he can tell you are close, and he is only just getting started.

Short Debts Make Long Friends - An overeducated, underpaid millennial finally gets to go on her first adventure.

* Reblog and get a snippet from Chapter 20! 😱 *

(And, thank you guys for the good vibes and encouragement from last week. They worked!)

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[dilf-din]

Feel it in My Body (Know it in My Mind)

Helmetless!Din x riduur!reader

WC: 950

Warnings: established relationship, so much fluff, good dad din

A/N: this is all the domestic sap and bliss you could ever want. I’m having feelings about this man and had to wring them out like a wet rag and this is what came out. Mando’a translations are at the end 🫶🏼 oh and title is from Love You for a Long Time by Maggie Rogers okay bye!!

Golden light flooded in through the open curtains, painting every surface with that late afternoon, hazy glow. Din’s eyes fluttered open to find the sun much lower in the sky than it was when he had laid down on the couch to read a book with Grogu. The boy was softly snoring in the crook of his arm. Din leaned his head back to take one more deep breath of this feeling, he scribbled it into the open page of his heart before drawing the book off his chest and placing it on the low table that sat next to him. He pulled the dusty blue pillow out from behind him and squeezed it into place between his body and Grogu. It was warm from Din’s own heat and smelled like him from the many evenings they had spent cuddled up in that same spot.

Grogu let out a deep sigh as his body relaxed even further into the cushion causing a smile to creep up Din’s cheeks. He ran a hand through the back of his hair and tugged at the ends. Maybe it was time for a trim, he thought to himself as he ran the same hand over his jaw where his stubble was starting to come in much thicker than normal.

His feet hit the tile floor covered in thick socks that softened the pads of his steps as he followed the sound of humming into the kitchen to find you, hair drawn away from your shoulders as you stood in front of the sink, elbows deep in bubbles scrubbing the dishes from tonight’s dinner prep. Your voice carried a quiet melody as you washed, rinsed, and dried everything methodically. Behind you, there was a large pot on the stove simmering with an aroma of spices that made Din’s mouth water.

He slipped his arms around your waist and pressed a long kiss to your neck before nuzzling into it.

“I didn’t hear you get up. Did I wake you?” you asked, turning your head slightly to nuzzle his forehead with your nose.

“No, riduur,” he smiled into your skin, “I woke on my own.”

“You’re awfully affectionate tonight,” you teased, while your hands stayed busy cleaning the rest of the mess in front of you.

He slipped his wide hands down around your forearms and drew them out of the water, spinning you to face him.

“Din,” you chided, though you weren’t upset in the slightest.

“I’ll finish them later,” he smiled, happy to be looking you in your eyes, “Why’d you stop singing?” he asked as he pulled you into a slow sway.

“I was just singing some old song my mother used to sing.”

“I liked it,” he said softly, pressing a kiss your nose.

“Are you okay?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I just love you, mesh’la. Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum.”

You rested your head on his shoulder while he whispered in his native tongue, words of worship and devotion. The life you lived together is one he fought for, labored over, and thought he had lost multiple times along the way. Between the creed and Gideon and just the regular perils that came with hunting, to be standing in a kitchen with the one he loved while his boy slept on the couch, Din was overcome with emotion.

You straightened your posture and pulled his head into your hands, still wet from the sink, admiring the feel of his beard beneath your finger tips. His eyes were so warm in the final light of the sun, the deep brown you always knew they were, long before you ever saw them.

“It feels like a dream sometimes, doesn’t it?”

He nodded, leaning further into your touch as one of your hands left his jaw to toy with the curls at the base of his neck.

“I’m not going anywhere. We’re not going anywhere. This is your family, our family, our home, and I’m going to love you for the rest of my life,” you whispered fiercely.

Din pressed his forehead to yours, even though you saw him now without a helmet more often than not, his heart was still closely tied to the ways of his people. That was something you had never asked him to change about himself, and one of the reasons he was drawn to you.

His lips found yours in a steady kiss. The kind that only came from years of knowing one another inside and out. His hands stayed on your waist as yours clung to his neck and tugged at his hair.

Your moment was interrupted by the sound of tiny feet padding down the hall.

“Buir?”

“In here,” Din smiled against your lips, pecking them one last time before pulling away.

The boy padded into the kitchen, dragging his stuffed frog beside him while one hand tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes. Din knelt down to scoop him up onto his hip.

“Sha’kajir?” his small voice asked, still gravelly from his nap.

Din chuckled, “Yes, ad’ika. Dinner is almost ready.”

“Kaysh guur' skraan,” you smiled, lifting the lid off the pot to stir everything together one last time.

“Yum,” Grogu smiled, his nose perking up at the smell filling the kitchen.

You both laughed while you reached up to the cabinet to pull down plates.

Din fished a pack of matches out of a drawer to light the candles on the small, round kitchen table while Grogu hopped up to get situated on his booster seat. A life of violence and loss led to having nightly dinners with his family. Din knew without a doubt he would endure it again a hundred times over if it meant he ended up here.

Mando’a translations

Riduur: spouse, partner

Mesh’la: beautiful

Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum: “I love you”, or, more accurately, “I will know you forever”

Buir: father

Sha’kajir: dinner

Ad’ika: son, little one

Kaysh guur' skraan: he loves his food

[jedipoodoo]

One of Those Days (Sergeant Hunter x Reader)

Notes: Food mention, Reader has a bad day, comfort with Hunter, Batcher isn't a bad girl she's just hungry. Inspired by @a-lil-perspective with help from @meadow-of-daisies-and-lavender.

Mando'a:

Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum - equivalent of "I Love You"

Cyare - Beloved

Ner Kar'ta - My Heart

"Kriff!" You exclaimed. The pot tumbled off the stove, splattering hot soup all over your front before splattering on the floor.

For Batcher, this was no issue. She dove upon the unclaimed mess as if you'd never fed her before in her life. Half of dinner was gone in seconds.

"Cyare, are you okay?" Hunter came running into the kitchen, goggles perched on top of his head from his woodworking.

"Yes, I'm fine, I mean-" You couldn't think, watching as Batcher devoured the dinner you'd worked so hard to make for everyone. Omega, Crosshair, and Wrecker were coming back from a long day of fishing, and they'd need something to fill their bellies with. You thought you could do this one small thing for them, but apparently that wasn't good enough.

To make matters worse, Batcher began to throw up all over the floor.

"No, no, bad girl, take it outside," Hunter grabbed the lurca by her collar, leading her out the door as you stared in growing horror at the mess on the kitchen floor.

"Cyare?" Hunter gingerly stepped around the mess, reaching out a hand to you.

"I was working on that all day..." you mumbled, still in shock.

"It's alright, you can make it another day," Hunter said gently.

At that, you burst into sobs, still frozen in shock. Hunter pulled you into his chest, holding you tight. He didn't say a word, only ran a hand up and down your back, letting you get it all out.

Your sobs became muted whimpers after a few minutes, and you heard Batcher outside, whining to be let back in.

"Let's get you to bed, huh? I'll get all this cleaned up." Hunter cooed.

"Wait, what about dinner?" You asked. 

"I can whip up some flatcakes just fine," He said, still gently rubbing your back.

"A-are you sure?" You asked nervously, "If you're gonna cook for everyone I should at least help with the clean up-" You made to reach for the pot on the floor, but Hunter scooped you up and lay you across his shoulder, marching off to your bedroom.

"Hunter-!" You tried to protest, but it turned into very unconvincing giggles.

Hunter chuckled, and tossed you on the bed. You tried to sit up, but Hunter loomed over you, forcing you to lay back down.

"You spent all day cooking what smelled like an absolutely heavenly meal, on top of managing the health of half the people here on the island. Take a nap, and then come and join us for dinner, alright?"

"I don't need a nap-"

"Yes, you do." he interrupted, pressing his nose against yours.

"But I'm not tired!"

"Yes you are."

You rolled your eyes, "I'm not a kid, Hunter-"

"Alright?" Hunter's breath fanned out across your cheeks as you looked into his eyes. His eyes had always been gorgeous, intense, discerning. You loved that about him. Today, like always, they were your weakness.

You bit your lip and sighed.

"Alright." You agreed. At last, Hunter rewarded you with a grin and kissed your forehead.

You thought he would get right on cleaning up the mess of what was formerly dinner, but Hunter took his time turning down the blankets and  tucking you in all nice and cozy.

"I love you, ner kar'ta," He whispered longingly.

"I love you too," you echoed, sitting up just enough to kiss his lips. Hunter caught your head, cradling your neck in his hand for a brief moment before resting you back on the pillow.

"Stay here until I call you, alright?" He said, whispering softly like it was all a big secret, "Don't worry about it, I have everything under control."

"Okay," You nodded, "I trust you."

Hunter kissed your forehead one more time, and dimmed the lights on his way out the door.

"I love you," You called after him, just as he started to close the door.

Before it closed all the way, you saw him wink.

"Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum"

[alltheirdamn]

A Bounty for Reward (Mando x f!reader)

CHAPTER 10

Summary: Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum Warnings: fluff (like a fuck ton), unprotected piv sex, oral (f receiving), graphic violence, weapons, mentions of SA (attempted), language, helmetless!din (omg??) Word Count: 11.2k A/N: Here it is... here's ~the moment~ you've been waiting for

The flicker of the fire between you cast violent shadows on Mando’s armor. You watched as the flames twisted and danced together, a dangerous waltz that erupted into the dark and rose into the air in orange embers. He had managed to find a secluded spot within the outer edge of the forest, only halfway back to the Crest. Your body ached from the walk, and the humidity didn’t help since your clothes were practically stuck to your skin. You didn’t understand how Mando survived under all the layers of armor. 

He had caught some frogs along the way, roasting them over the fire to help quell the hunger pains in your stomach. You were grateful for it. 

“Mando,” you spoke softly. 

He had been fixated on cooking, keeping to himself while you cleaned your blade and watched. His helmet raised without hesitation, the stare that ruminated behind his visor sending chills down your spine. 

He waited for you to continue. 

“Why me?” you asked.

 It was a question without explanation, a question that held more weight than you could hold on your own. You needed answers. You needed clarity. You needed a reason, any reason, to deny yourself the feelings that swelled inside your chest, begging to rupture. 

He considered you a moment, carefully turning the stick over the fire as the frog cooked through. His hands folded together, elbows resting on his knees as he looked past the flames that lapped forcibly in the evening breeze. 

“I lost my parents in a Separatist attack when I was young,” Mando began, “The Mandalorians taught me to let go of my emotions and follow the Way. My armor became my protection, and I learned that emotions were the weakness I needed to conquer.”

Crestfallen, you continued listening silently, watching his body language tense with each new admission. 

“I’ve only ever been loyal to my Clan, but then you show up as this helpless bounty,” he paused, helmet lifting to meet your saddened gaze, “You weren’t a criminal or a murderer. Turning you in wasn’t worth a reward, and I couldn’t figure out why I cared so much. I just did.”

There was a brief silence between you– comfortable, yet the air felt compressed by a heaviness you couldn’t fathom, a slow suffocation that wilted your breath.

You leaned forward, urging him to continue.

“I still do,” he corrected himself. “I’ve tried to deny myself this attachment to you, but I can’t anymore.”

Without thought, you stood, letting your body drift to where he sat. Every molecule in your body strained towards him, every forbidden emotion unraveling inside you. It was dangerous, letting yourself lose to the battle that stirred inside you. You ruined him and took his loyalty from his Clan without realizing it. It was selfish of you to let yourself grow so close, to allow him to grow this close. 

You were taking away the very thing that made him a Mandalorian. 

How could you?

How could you be so selfish?

Crouching before him, you steadied yourself on the balls of your feet, nails gripping his thighs. You had to make it clear to him that he could not lose himself to you, regardless of what you felt. He had to detach. He had to let go. 

“I’m not worth all of this,” you uttered. “I can’t ask you to abandon your Creed.”

Mando reached out, brushing the hair from your face. Shrouded in the shadows the fire cast, he couldn’t see how your eyes pooled with tears; the emotions smothered you, threatening your judgment, blinding you from the decision you chose to make. 

It was for the best, you told yourself.

It felt like a lie. 

He said your name, a whisper through the breeze that surrounded you. 

“I want you to know me, angel. All of me. If I’m going to break my Creed, I only want it to be for you.”

“Breaking your Creed… that means?”

“Ni copaanir haa’taylir ni,” he spoke softly. “I want you to see me.”

“Like without your helmet?” You cautioned.

He nodded, cupping your cheek to steady your gaze.

“Not here. Not now. But when you’re ready, I’ll show you.”

“Mando—.” You whined.

“Just think about it, okay? I’m willing to give you everything. I’m tired of fighting this attachment inside me. I’m tired of pretending this isn’t real.”

You rested your head on his knee, gazing up into the helmet visor, imagining what he looked like behind all the armor. What color were his eyes, and did they ever soften when he looked at you? Was his face as tan as his hands were? Would kissing him feel like coming home? Maker, you never realized how badly you ached to see him, to know every piece of him. He saw you freely every day: your body, eyes, and smile. You wanted to know if his smile was as beautiful as you believed.

You didn’t want to take him from his Creed, but you were so fucking greedy to know him.

“What color are your eyes?” You asked.

He smoothed a thumb over your cheek, and you could hear flames cracking behind your body in the silence. 

“They're brown, angel.”

You were crying, and you couldn’t understand why. 

He was yours. 

Every fiber of your being yearned for him, and you were terrified to accept that you were falling in love—if this was what love felt like. You had never allowed yourself to give into those emotions, nor had you ever been given the opportunity after your parents died. Love wasn’t something you knew. All you knew was pain and aggression. This felt foreign; the emotions inside you were confusing and all too overwhelming. You didn’t deserve this, but maybe you could learn. 

“I want to know you,” you admitted. “All of you.”

“I’m yours.”

Mando offered a hand to help you to your feet, leading you back to the log you had been sitting on. He pulled a cooked frog off the fire, extending it to you, and you both ate in harmonious silence. 

The fire died out after a few hours, the embers dwindling until there was barely any light between you and Mando. The fatigue from the day had finally caught up to you to its full capacity, and you couldn’t keep from yawning. Mando still sat beside you, his hand resting at the top of your kneecap. He had been able to stop touching you since he caught you, always keeping one hand on your body in some way. Resting your head on his shoulder, you let the cool touch of his pauldron soothe your sweating body and drift off to sleep after fighting it for too long. 

Daybreak streaked behind your eyelids, and you woke with a heavy groan. Mando had let you rest against him the entire night, his body tense and alert. Once he knew you were finally awake, he softly squeezed your knee and whispered your name.

“We should get moving,” he said.

Lifting your head, you nodded. Only a few more hours and you’d be back in the safety of the Crest. 

“Did you sleep at all?” You asked, stretching your arms to release the tension in your muscles.

“I had to keep watch.”

You were guilty of letting yourself sleep when you knew he hadn’t in days. You caused him so much fear when you’d left he probably hadn’t slept in nearly three days—maybe more. You needed to get back to the ship so he could rest. 

“Take the bed when we get back,” you offered. “You can sleep, and I’ll take the floor.”

“There’s still a bounty to hunt,” he sighed. “I promised Karga an extra quarry, so I need to deliver. When we return, I’ll ensure you’re safe and head out again. I don’t think he’s gone far, probably thinks I let him go free, and now he’s sitting idle.”

“I promise not to run.” You attempted a joke, but it didn’t land.

“Better fucking not,” he growled.

Your thighs clenched together at his tone, and you sat up straighter. His threats always managed to snake through your veins in a way you couldn’t help but react to. After all the emotions being laid out on the table, you needed to know how he’d fuck you now. 

“Let’s get back to the ship,” you murmured, grabbing his hand and tugging him away from the makeshift campsite.

You never thought you’d be so happy to see the Crest again. Walking up the ramp hand in hand with Mando, you couldn’t help but sigh a breath of relief. You let him wander off to the armory wall, watching as he swapped out his blaster for a new one along with a vibroblade. A hissing noise came from the carbonite chamber, which worried you that the valve was malfunctioning again. You were too far from the village to gather more tools, so you’d have to work with what you had to fix the valve if it was faulty. 

“How soon can we get off Sorgan?” You wondered aloud.

Mando clipped the blaster to his belt and walked to look at the chamber with you.

“The moment I catch the bounty, we’re leaving. I need to get to Nevarro to give Karga these bounties, and hopefully, Bo Katan will be ready by then.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to rest?” You chewed at your bottom lip, worrying he’d get hurt on his hunt.

You had barely been back in the safety of his presence for maybe 24 hours, and now he was leaving again. But this time was different; you had a reason to stay. You wanted to stay. 

Mando embraced you, his arms snaking around your shoulder blades and squeezing you softly. You inhaled that familiar scent lingering on his suit and armor, nestling your head against his metal breastplate. How did you think you could leave this? You grappled with the guilt still lingering inside of you for all you had done. You tore away everything you had built together, and that trust you once had was hanging on by a thread. But you’d stay and prove to him that you could keep your word.

“I’ll be back soon, angel,” he murmured into your ear. “Be safe, and don’t leave.”

“I won’t,” you mumbled.

After a few more moments wrapped up in each other, Mando was gone. You stared at the space around you, realizing it was the first time you could call somewhere home—an old beat-up fighter ship and a grumpy Mandalorian—that was home now. Nothing else mattered.

Your body was still so exhausted from the trek back to the ship that you collapsed onto the bed and fell into a deep sleep. Thankfully, there were no nightmares or memories to flood your senses, only total darkness. It wasn’t long before you were jolting upwards at the strong smell of gas. 

You cursed yourself for not taking care of the gas leak earlier. 

Dank Farrik.

Running on little sleep and even lower motivation, you grabbed the toolbox and rummaged for a wrench and pliers. The new valve was supposed to fix the problem in the freezing stage of the carbonite chamber, not make it worse. The leak was worse, the gas escaping further into the hold until it fogged your vision. If it gets any worse, you thought, the entire chamber would be nonfunctional, and it would cause some problems with the bounties Mando had already collected.

Rubbing away the sleep from your eyes, your hands pulled at the leaking valve, inspecting where the issue had begun. The freezer valve you had bought was, in fact, faulty, the heat stripping away a layer of the pipe, leaving a tear in the rubber material. Fuck. There was no way to fix it unless you had a new pipe or some patching material. Even with that, the leak wouldn’t hold for long, especially in the ship's pressurized cabin. The only option you had right now was to try your best to wrap the tear until Mando got you to Nevarro, and you could hopefully find a better mechanic shop. 

But for now, you reattached the pipe valve, keeping the bolt on the looser side to prevent another tear. There was nothing remotely close to the material needed that laid around the Crest, so thinking quickly, you stripped away a piece of cloth from the lining of your shirt, tying it tight over the tear. The gas still came out steadily, but far less than it had been moments ago. There was a good chance the fabric would wear away or catch fire, so time was limited on the leak before it turned into a real issue.

With the fragrant gas in the hull, you opted to lower the ramp— despite Mando’s warnings— and release some pressurized air into the open. The fog was dense outside, the visibility minimal as you scanned the perimeter. Something felt ominous about it, but you assured yourself that the location of the Crest was safe. And his bounty was only going to take, at most, a few hours. 

Leaving the ramp fully lowered, you returned to the carbonite chamber, checking over the other bounties on the hold. The four in Mando’s possession remained locked into their blocks, the steady red light pulsing on the side, indicating that the freezing gas was still working at total capacity in each block. The good news is that it was an isolated issue. Bad news: Mando wouldn’t be able to store any more quarries without risking destroying the integrity of the entire chamber.

Tapping on the comlink on your wrist, you sent an alert to Mando’s, awaiting a response. Giving him a few minutes to respond— he was on a hunt, after all— you situated yourself on one of the crates closer to the ramp, enjoying the fresh air as it breezed through the hold.

Too much time had passed before you realized he never responded to the initial alert. Pressing the com button, you spoke into it warily. 

“Mando, come in.”

Static.

“Mando, come in.”

More static. Enough that electrified your nerves into deep worry. Mando never had comlink issues, and he never took off his comlink. 

“Shit,” you muttered to yourself. You couldn’t leave the Crest, and you definitely couldn’t leave the gas leak unattended without the fear of the entire cargo hold catching fire. 

Returning to the torn valve, you worked at maneuvering the stripped fabric around it so that it wouldn’t snag on any heated metal. The bolt that held the valve in place was hot to the touch— hotter than usual. Grabbing the wrench again, you twisted off the bolt, cursing yourself as it fell against your palm. The grease left a small burn streak, and you made a mental note to patch it up later.

A med patch! Why you hadn’t thought of it the first time, you didn’t know, but you left the valve exposed while you searched for the med pack Mando left hanging in the refresher. Searching through the pack, you found the med patches, seeing only three left. Mando would have a fit over wasting them on the valve, but it was either this or catching fire. Unwrapping it from its packaging, you peeled away the adhesive, wrapping it strategically around the tear. The patch was thick enough to withstand the gas and heat, buying you more time to find a new valve pipe.

Twisting back on the bolt for good measure, you looked over your work, satisfied for now at the last-minute resolution. If anything, Mando would at least be impressed by your quick thinking. After all, you had been the child of a junkyard owner; you knew your way around most issues. 

The burning sting on your skin was your next point of action; the searing red outline of the bolt inflamed against your skin. With only two med patches left, you chose a less sterile option and wrapped your hand with a roll of gauze unraveled in the med pack. It wouldn’t protect it from much, but it was enough of a solution for now.

A rustling outside the Crest alerted your attention, your skin rippling in pulsating nerves. Mando hadn’t responded to his comlink, and the infinite amount of ‘what-ifs’ was too high to consider any good outcomes. 

“Mando, come in,” you hissed into the comlink on your wrist. 

No response. 

Ducking behind a stack of crates, you reach towards the weaponry wall, grabbing at the blaster rifle Mando left behind. He had only taken a vibroblade and blaster, so you internally thanked him for leaving such a big weapon for you to protect yourself with now. Even if you had no fucking idea how to shoot a rifle, you’d try your best. You aimed it through a gap in the crates, eyes laser-focused on the expanse of grass lying in front of you. Holding your breath, you waited. 

“Looks like they abandoned it,” a voice grumbled, the sound coming from the left of the ramp. Your eyes snapped towards the side, connecting the voice to the grizzly face of a spice smuggler. Flanked behind him were two more men, both strapped with rifle weapons that resembled Mando’s. Squinting through the gap in the crates, you could see the two armed men wearing bounty comlinks, a hologram of your face displaying over them. 

Shit. 

So, it was true– more people had their hands on your bounty, and this time, it was for a far higher price in credits. The only thing keeping your fear somewhat at bay was the fact that you were still wanted alive. Kesi wouldn’t want you dead now; he would want you back in his hold to use as he pleased. Or, he wanted to kill you himself. Either way, you wouldn’t let yourself be taken this easily. 

The leader of the three began to tromp up the ramp, the weapon in his hands looking to be a modified blaster. The body of the blaster rifle looked standard issue, but with the added power pack clipped into the chamber, it could have the firing rate of a repeating rifle. If that was the case, then your bounty no longer considered the need for you to be alive. The thought of it made your skin crawl. 

“Rik,” he motioned to the one flanked on his left to move forward, “Scan the cargo hold. Find anything we can use to find her.”

“Gresk,” he tilted his head to the other, this one a pale green Rodian, “Keep watch on the clearing. I don’t know when that Mandalorian will return, and I don’t want to be caught off guard when he does.”

Gresk responded in a gurgle of noises, turning to stand guard at the base of the ramp. The leader, still unknown to you, began trodding up the ramp, Rik on his left. Your eyes– and rifle– moved with their movements, tracking them through the cargo hold. There would be little coverage for yourself as they moved closer, and you couldn’t shoot down one without risking the others to finish you off. 

“I’m going up to the cockpit,” the leader said, “He’s gotta have some sort of tracker on her, or at least previous logged data on her whereabouts.”

“Got it,” Rik said, his hand clenching around his blaster. 

As the other man ascended into the cockpit, your focus returned to Rik, who was now siphoning through the cargo crates. Most were empty, sans a few that held miscellaneous ship parts and scrap metal. Luckily, the weaponry cabinet had shut after you grabbed the rifle, the contents of Mando’s arsenal a secret to the bounty hunters on board. 

Rik’s footsteps grew closer, and you were running on limited options in terms of survival. He didn’t hold the same modified blaster as the other, but the standard carbine rifle most hunters carried. He would have the upper hand at close range since your range was limited from the floor with the sniper rifle. There was a loud crash in the cockpit, redirecting Rik’s focus, and it gave you the smallest window to make a move. 

Scrambling up from the floor, you angled the stock end upwards, driving the edge of it into the hunter’s shoulder. Yelling in pain, Rik tumbled to the ground, writhing in enough pain for you to escape the corner you had been hidden between. 

But it wasn’t enough of a safety gap before Gresk turned around, his blaster aiming at you. The plasma blasts skimmed past you, hitting the metal walls behind your head. Yanking the rifle upwards to eye level, you sent a wave of blasts towards him, the use of the rifle scope unnecessary in short range. None of them struck, a disadvantage to your bad luck that was overflowing. Shit. Gresk returned fire, climbing the ramp to get to closer range. You continued to fire the rifle, the blasts searing the walls around him as he closed in. Ducking behind crates wouldn’t stop the plasma beams from striking you, so you opted for no weapons. Hand-to-hand would be more of a benefit to you. 

Dropping down, you moved to kick Gresk’s legs out from under him, the blaster falling against the metal ground with a loud clunk. Grunting in pain, Gresk scrambled upwards, grabbing at your pant leg to tackle you down. Hitting the ground hard, your mind fizzled out momentarily, but a moment was all Gresk needed to get the upper hand. Pressing a blade to your throat, he grunted out a few alien words, compressing your airways in the process.

Losing breath, your fingers strained to find the handle of the blaster beside you, scrapping it against the ground until you found a firmer grip. Pressing the barrel to his side, Gresk fell over with a swift pull of the trigger; the release sounds enough to deafen your ears in an echo of vibrations. His body weight sagged onto your chest, your body heaving several breaths as you pushed him off. Wriggling yourself semi-free—your ankle caught under his waist— you laid in contempt, waiting for death or salvation to take its turn on you. 

A stirring groan behind you forced your attention, and you watched as Rik dizzyingly began to stand, eyes focused on you as you lay trapped under Gresk. 

“Rungar! Found the girl!” Rik yelled, his blaster pointed at you.

With a hand still hugging the blaster beside you, you lifted it high enough to send a shot at Rik, but not without him sending one back down, grazing the top of your left shoulder.

“Fuck!” you yelped, the blaster falling from your hand. 

Rik toppled over, the hole burning through his sternum smoldering in red and orange colors. The smack of his head on the crates sent the stack of them crashing into the refresher door, the metal denting under the weight of impact.

The larger of the three, Rungar, as you knew now, clobbered down the stairs, the modified blaster tight in his grip. Your leg was still trapped under Gresk, your shoulder was burning in blinding pain from the blaster shot, and your hopes to come out of this alive were slowly dwindling. 

Rungar gave you a toothy grin, his mouth curling upwards under his overgrown beard. He wasn’t dressed like a bounty hunter, nor did he carry the usual weapon of a bounty hunter. The possibility he could be a smuggler or a pirate worsened the situation. Because if he was— more than just bounty hunters had your hologram plastered across the galaxy. And if the information fell into the wrong hands… worse people than Kesi would be on your tail. 

Crouching beside you, Rungar let the barrel of his blaster coast over your skin, the coolness of the metal sending debilitating chills up your spine. He let it glide over your stomach and chest and finally let it rest on the burn at the top of your shoulder. You winced in pain, unable to hold back a whine as he dug it in further.

“It’s a real shame that Mandalorian isn’t here,” he thought out loud, “I was hoping to kill him off, too.”

When nothing but a whimper escaped your lips, he continued, his eyes dancing over your injured body.

“You made this far too easy for me,” he said, slowly lifting your chin with the barrel of his gun. 

Squirming under his touch and Gresk’s body, you pulled your free leg around, knocking Rungar sideways in a loss of balance. His finger pulled against the trigger in his daze, a sputter of blasts bouncing around the cargo hold. Shards of metal and wood rained down on you, and you struggled to free your trapped ankle as Rungar gathered himself again. With another forced tug, your ankle slid free, and your hand came around to deliver a hard punch to Rungar’s side. 

The force of the hit hurt your hand more than it hurt him, as he laughed at your attempt to stun him. 

“I like it when my girls put up a fight,” he snarled, pulling your hand into a bone-breaking vice. 

Yelping in pain, you stood paralyzed as his thick fingers twisted around your skin, the bones under his grip rubbing against one another. Refusing to give up yet, you threw your leg around his calf, pulling it forward until his weight gave out under him, his body sent flailing forward against Rik’s dead body. Shifting his hold on your wrist, you pulled his arm around his back, the bones in his shoulder cracking as you yanked it backward. 

Rungar screamed in a mixture of pain and anger, his face twisting back to see you. You smiled, gripping his wrist tighter, watching as he writhed in pain below you. But it didn’t last long as he rolled his body, dismissing the pain in his shoulder as he brought his blaster up to aim at you. With only a millisecond to react, the shot skimmed past your face, leaving a devastating hole in the metal behind you. Not only was the modified blaster able to shoot automatic rounds, but it also had a more significant target attached to its barrel. The larger the target, the bigger the destruction. 

The only option left that you had now was to run. Mando was unresponsive, and the Crest was standing in literal tatters as the destruction of the blasters caused too much cosmetic damage. You were lucky enough that none of the shots had hit the broken valve– one shot would have sent the entire ship up in flames and you with it. Turning to run, you trampled over Gresk’s body, nearly tripping with the lack of strength your ankle had from being trapped so long. Another round of shots fired off behind you, this time one hitting you in the back of your thigh. It wasn’t a full shot, but the shrapnel of the plasma had hit you enough to leave you injured and falling to your face. 

“Maker, fuck!” You screamed, your hand instinctively reaching back to feel your skin tinged with the burn. 

“I told you,” Rungar’s voice crept closer, “I like it when you put up a fight.”

His hands groped your body, pushing you over onto your back. The stench of his breath was hot on your cheek as he leaned into you, lips roaming over your chin and neck. 

“I like it even more when they can’t fight back,” he laughed, the tip of his tongue skating over the pulse surging under your throat. 

It sickened you, blinding all senses as you fell victim to his power. You seethed with anger as you felt his hands trailing over your body, fingers digging into the burning flesh of your thigh. You screamed in pain, tears spilling over your cheeks. All you could do was struggle and squirm under his hold, your arms pinned at your sides. Your fingers search for anything you could use against him, wishing— no, begging—for release from this nightmare. Too often had you experienced this exact moment with several other men and clients, and you wouldn’t let your last moments alive end like this. You wouldn’t let yourself die without telling Mando how you felt and how much you needed him. You had control; you had the strength to fight back this time. 

Fumbling fingers brushed against something metal, and the blade handle grazing your fingertips. In his own daze, Rungar was incapacitated to feel any motion below him, and you took the opportunity to grab onto the handle with desperate force. 

Holding your breath, you pulled slowly, coaxing it free from the leather holster at his hip. You could still feel the crawl and dig of his fingers as he roamed your chest, kneading the soft flesh of your skin with low groans in his throat. It was easy to fixate on the surge of bile stirring in your stomach, but you suppressed it, keeping focus on pulling the blade free. 

With a heavier yank than expected, you freed the blade, the jerk of your elbow a brief distraction for Rungar. His eyes grew in rage as he saw the blade gripped between your fingers.

“You stupid bitch!” He roared, knee driving into your abdomen to keep you pinned.

You reeled over, the pain shooting up your body as you tried to keep centered on the goal of staying alive. Rungar’s hands shot to yours, fighting with the blade as you kept a white-knuckled grip around the handle. Minor cuts grazed his calloused fingers, but they were no concern to him as he continued prodding your fingers open.

He was nearly successful in pulling your fingers free, the blade slightly slipping out as he shifted his weight, giving you a fraction of room to slide free of his hold and scramble onto your knees. Regaining balance and control, you plunged the metal knife upwards into his chest, driving it right between the soft tissue of his collarbone. Twisting it with what little strength you had left, you listened to the harmony of his screams, digging it further in. It wasn’t enough to kill him, but enough to disable him briefly so that you could gather yourself.

Grabbing his weapon from beside his writhing body, you unleashed a round of shots into his body. It should have sickened you, seeing the hail of plasma destroy the dirtied skin of the pirate. But in the blinded, desperate rage… watching him struggle in death felt good. It was a moment of power, a moment to claim back all you had lost over all the years in Kesi’s hold. It wasn’t just his death; it was the death of every single man that had touched you. Every time you said no, every unwanted touch, every night tied up in the dark… it was all dead in your memories.

Pain erupted from you as you turned to the other two lifeless bodies, another round of shots laying claim until there was no longer recognition in their features. Rik and Gresk were minimized to nothing but seared flesh and charred bones. Never had you seen— or done— anything so gruesome. But still, you didn’t feel sick. Not an ounce of remorse tingled in your body, nor did you feel the pain of your injuries.

You felt triumphant.

You felt reclaimed.

You kept to yourself for the next few hours, watching the sun pass over the sky behind thick layers of fog. The ramp stayed lowered as you let the smell of burning flesh roll out into the open. At first, the scent tinged your nose, but it had been long enough now that you no longer noticed the stench. Your adrenaline was also slowing in your veins, replaced by the paranoia of other hunters coming for you. Mando still was unresponsive in the comlink, and you had given up trying. Keeping the modded weapon near you, you replayed the events repeatedly in your head, wondering what more you could have done. You had been successful, yes, but not successful enough. 

In the distance, you saw the outline of reflective beskar emerging through the forest's edge. Mando was hauling the bounty on the cable he had used on you just days ago. The dead bounty dragged against the muddy ground, leaving a trail with each step Mando made. Taking in the situation before him, Mando unclipped the cable from his waist and sprinted toward you. 

Rising from the ramp, you walked down slowly, watching in simmering anger as his silhouette jogged closer, his pace approaching a cautious stride. Looking at the remnants of the fight, Mando paused several yards from you. Your body twitched, a deep yearning for him folding over the other emotions that swam within your bloodstream. Tossing the blaster lazily to the ground, you closed the gap between you, standing feet from him.

“Is your comlink broken?” You bit, the rage no longer at a simmer but a full-on boil.

“You’re injured,” he stated, his helmet trailing over the outline of your body.

“Oh, so your eyes work at least,” you snarled. 

Your name was a whisper on his tongue, “What happened?”

“I got ambushed. Three hunters.”

“And they’re dead?” He cautioned, focus now turning to the spectacle behind you. 

The smoke that had since filtered out of the Crest now danced through the clouds and fog above you.

“I had no choice. You weren’t responding,” you accused.

“The bounty got a good shot in. Bounced off my comlink and smashed the transmitter,” Mando explained, raising his wrist to show the proof.

The metal attached to his wrist guard was bent inward, shards of the comlink jutting out in all directions. It was nonrepairable, the transmitter far beyond the point of replacement. The entire comlink would need to be replaced, and that just added to the list of things to fix on Nevarro.

“They’re dead?” he asked again, and this time, you turned towards the destruction, nodding as you looked upon the Crest.

“Yeah,” you sighed. 

More than dead, you thought to yourself.

“I’m proud of you,” his voice was rugged, a hint of something under his words. 

“That I killed people?” You scoffed. “You’re proud I’m a murderer now?”

“No. I’m proud you defended yourself,” he corrected himself. 

“I had no choice.” You were bitter.

Turning from him, you began walking back to the Crest, a slight limp in your leg as the pain faded and went. There were still fizzles of adrenaline shooting through your nerves, enough to pacify the sting of the blaster shot. Mando’s heavy boots followed suit, his pace quickening to match yours.

“How bad is it?” He asked. About your injury or the mess, you didn’t know.

“My leg or my shoulder?” You continued walking, unphased.

Mando’s hand grabbed at your arm, twisting you around. His helmet did a long once over of your body, settling again on your face. 

“How hurt are you?”

“I haven’t had time to look, but I assume it's pretty bad,” you lamented. “Three against one isn’t very good odds.”

“You came out alive,” his voice was softer now. “I like those odds.”

A moment stalled between you, and you could feel your anger phasing out the longer you stood in his presence. Something about the security of his body, the armor he wore, the weapons he carried— it all summed up into a man you couldn’t live without any longer. How you could survive in the universe without him, you didn’t know; the luck you had today would run out eventually. 

You wondered if Mando could feel your anger dissipating the longer he stared because you felt the way your chest slowed its rise and fall as it returned to a normal staccato of breathing. His gloved fingers grazed over your shoulder, your shirt covered in dried blood that clung to your charred skin. It was a tender feeling as his thumb rubbed the swollen skin around the wound, yet something else inside you pulsed in earnest need. Maker, what was this?

“I should have some bacta spray in the med pack. I’ll patch it up,” he decided. 

“Well,” you stalled. “We have a bit of cleaning to do first.”

“It can wait. You risk infection if we don’t get it sprayed and bandaged first.”

“Mando…” You were weary, “It’s bad.”

There was a hitch in your breath, your eyes bouncing between his visor and the smoking ship. Yes, you had sat on the ramp and watched the day pass, but you hadn’t looked back on the mess you had left. 

It wasn’t a mess.

It was a massacre.

The adrenaline was thickening in your veins, slowing all blood flow entirely. No longer were you seeing the world around you in a haze; reality was a bitch that bit down hard. The pain in your extremities came on suddenly, then all at once, inspiring your ability to stand much longer. Sagging into his side, you clung to Mando’s breastplate, nails digging into hardened beskar. His hand caught under your armpit, hauling you up against his body, helmet peering down on you in silent worry.

“You shouldn’t have waited this long,” he scolded, “You’re probably infected already.”

“Mando,” your voice was barely above a whisper, the pain stripping away your voice. It was all you could breathe out before a wave of tears and cries burst from your chest.

Images of the men's bodies and their mutilated features tore through your mind, the vivid memories painted permanently in the indents of your brain. It was a choice you had to make, yet it sickened you to know you caused this damage.

“Whatever it is, I can deal with it,” he assured you. “What matters right now is you.”

He pulled you tighter against his body, his grip on your side enough to keep you pinned against him as he walked you both forward back to the Crest. The smell of smoke had long carried off, at least to you, and you didn’t know what Mando could or could not smell. 

“I’m so sorry.” It was an apology mostly to yourself. 

The Crest was painted with blaster shots, their rounds embedded in the steel shell of the ship. Splatters of body parts were strewn across the ground, the flesh mixing with shards of wood that had exploded in the crossfire. It was horrifying to look upon the ship with fresh eyes, the ghosts of their struggle plastered across the expanse of the cargo hold. A silent cloud of understanding hung over Mando as he walked you through the maze of destruction, his hand occasionally reassuring you with a small squeeze. He spoke nothing as he looked onwards at the fragments left in your wake, the shrapnel of your past lodged within the metal bearings of his ship. Rungar had awoken a beast inside you, one that preyed and hungered for your vulnerability. For so long, you had been able to smother the darkest parts of your past, to silence the screams within your mind with distractions. Mando had even been a distraction– his life constantly moving and his quiet needs that met yours in the desperate moments that melted together. Odd enough, his pain and your pain weren't too far off; the only difference was that he hadn’t seen your pain unravel in front of his eyes. 

No one had. 

Not even you. 

Mando offered no words as he scanned the remainder of the Crest, his boots walking meticulously through the pathway of bodies, finding his way to the med pack lying on the ground. Surprised to find it intact, you watched as Mando siphoned through the components in search of the bacta spray and the med patches. Your wounds were pulsating in pain, the effects of your emotions getting the betterment of your mind and body, the need to stay awake and alert slipping away the longer you waited for Mando to find the spray. 

“Hey,” he snapped, noticing as your head fell against the gash on your shoulder. Your eyes blinked softly at him, mind foggy as you watched his helmet turn from one into two. 

“M’sorry Mando,” you muttered. “I lost it. I really lost it, didn’t I?”

His hand shot to your face, fingers pinching at your cheek until you knocked consciousness back into your body. Panic tore through his body language as he rushed further into finding the bacta spray, finally gripping it and two med patches in his hand. You had forgotten there were only two left. 

“Two should be enough to cover these right now, but I’ll need to get more so we can change them in a few days,” he explained, laying them out as he readied the spray can. “I swear I had more of them.”

“You did,” you groaned, head lulling to the side again. Catching it, Mando focused your eyes on his visor, shaking your jaw until you stayed upright. “The freezer valve on the carbonite chamber was leaking, so I used a med patch to save us some time until we could buy a new pipe.”

Mando’s head turned over his shoulder, considering your work restoring the contraption. While the rest of the ship was questionable in terms of functionality, the carbonite chamber was still fully functioning, albeit with the small leak that had been subdued. 

“I’m sorry.” It was the only words you could find fitting in the silent expanse around you. “Fuck, I’m really sorry.”

You drew your hands to your face, forgetting the burn that stung your palm, now ripped open and dirtied from fighting. The gauze you had covering it was now bloodied and stained, another reminder of the mess you had created. 

“I fucked up,” you muffled your cries in your hands, “I ruined your ship. I—I killed people. I’m a fucking murderer. I’m a murderer, Mando!”

Your cries turned into sobs, your body shaking as you continued hiding your face behind your bandaged hands. Soft, gloved hands reached out, taking your wrists in a strong vice. With blurred eyes and cheeks dewy from tears, you woefully watched as Mando turned your injured hand over in his, examining the burn with expert consideration. You were a fucking mess, coming completely undone in front of a man that should rather want you dead, at least for the damage you had done on his fucking ship.

“You’re not a murderer,” he spoke, his finger brushing over the inflamed skin of your palm. “You defended yourself, and there’s a difference. You had no choice, right?”

You were silent. 

“Right?�� He asked again, this time with an edge of exasperation. 

All you could do was nod, the muddy images of Rungar on top of you slowly floating to the surface of your memory. Shot after shot, your mind snapped into the moment— under his bodyweight, under his hold, under his breath. Wagging your head in protest, you shoved what remained of your unfortunate encounter into the depths of your mind, hoping they could rot away in the darkest corners. 

Your name off Mando’s tongue was enough to quell the wrench inside your heart, a pacifier to the surmounting pain that overflowed beyond the reaches of your nerves and mind. Guiding your hand away from your body, Mando covered it in bacta spray, followed by a pained wince off your lips. 

“I won’t use the med patch on this, but we’ll need to keep it clean,” he said. 

“Mhmm.”

You were fading, your consciousness slipping the further you succumbed to the pain and trauma. Mando’s hands were rough on your skin, a force to keep you alert and steady on him. Yet, you ached to lose yourself to the pull of sleep. If you were asleep, at least you could forget the world burning around you.

You were destruction in the human form.

Everything you had ever known was gone, and part of you— all of you— wondered if it was your fault.

Had you fought harder, maybe your parents would still be alive.

Had you fought harder, maybe you wouldn’t have been Kesi’s slave.

Had you fought harder, maybe you could have kept your freedom.

But now, this was all you were. All you would ever be.

A hopeless mess.

**

Failure.

That’s all Mando could think as he pieced together the mess inside the hull. He was a failure. He left her alone somewhere he thought was safe. He risked her life for a bounty. He almost lost her. All in a single day. He was a fucking failure. 

He had carried her limp body to the bed, hand smoothing down her matted hair. Despite it all, he was proud of her. Proud that she outsmarted three bounty hunters. Proud that she fought them off. Proud that she made it out alive. 

She shouldn’t have had to do any of that in the first place had he been there with her. He should have stayed; he should have taken off his fucking helmet and claimed her, body and soul until the world collapsed around them. She needed him more than anything, and he failed. 

His mind reeled on an endless loop of hopelessness. And at the core of it all was this twisting inside his heart, thinking of the possibility that almost turned reality; he had nearly lost her. 

He knew there was a possibility other hunters were out to find her, but he had been so caught up in this comfortable world they built together that he didn’t consider the risks. He had failed her in more ways than one.

And he would rip the galaxy to shreds if that meant keeping her alive. 

She was his entire world now. 

He left the cockpit after a while, setting the navigation for Nevarro. He needed to return his bounties; they needed more supplies to fix the Crest. More importantly, he needed to meet with Bo Katan and rid the galaxy of the man he hated most. 

Whatever happened in the hull, the Crest had nearly been desecrated. He hadn’t let her see his shock when they walked up the ramp; he had been far more concerned with the state she was in. But the destruction inside was enough to tell him she fought hard. The metal frame of the hull was littered with blaster holes, now burnt into gaping black spaces. Crates were destroyed, vibro blade marks scattered the floor paneling, and worst of it all was the blood that covered almost everything. 

Mando couldn’t distinguish where one body started and the other ended. Each one was massacred to the point he could no longer identify them by face or body. He shuddered at the images that burned into his memory. He had never seen such brutality before. She had poured every ounce of her anger into those rounds of shots, and his heart ached for her. She held so much pain and fear, always staying strong for him, that in those moments of survival, she let them consume her. 

He didn’t know what they had done to her, and anger seized him every time he thought of the possibilities. When she was ready to open up, he’d listen. But he would be patient. Grief and guilt consumed her. 

But he would be damned if he let her pain be her pain alone. 

Hours passed, and he had finished cleaning what he could of the Crest and found himself settling into the silence of the cockpit. She was still sleeping heavily in his bed, and he needed to find the right words to calm her when she woke.

She killed them, but she wasn’t a murderer.

She fought for herself. She was strong.

She survived. 

But more importantly, he needed to prove his loyalty to her. He would remain at her side no matter what the galaxy threw at them because she meant more to him than any Creed or Clan. He needed her to see him even if she wasn’t ready. 

**

You awoke in a blazing silence that sat heavy around you. Every muscle in your body screamed in pain, the adrenaline rush now fully satiated. Waking alone was jarring, and you feared for a moment you hadn’t survived. Was this hell? The silence was deafening, the darkness thick and washing over you. 

Where was Mando? 

With a rasping voice, you called out for him. You peeled your body away from the bed, scared to revisit the horrors inside the hull. But as you limped around in the darkness, there was no trace left of the bodies that had been laid out. Aside from the lingering blaster holes, everything had been cleaned. Your heart seemed to seize with a profound sense of gratitude. Mando had done this for you. Somewhere inside you, you knew that. 

“You’re awake,” his voice was rough. 

You jolted at his sudden appearance, leaning against the ladder of the cockpit. He was in nothing but his pilot suit and helmet, the dark visor tracking you as you walked the path through the empty space. His presence soothed the ache in your bones, and you so desperately needed to feel his arms wrapped around you. 

“You cleaned it.” 

His helmet dipped, the silence fading back into place. You paced around, your feet drifting you closer to his body. He didn’t move, only watched you silently. You had been used to the silence, but now all you wanted was his words filling the air around you. You needed to drown out the silence.

“I’m sorry—I… It’s all a blur.” 

“I know, angel.” 

“I didn’t—.”

“Stop,” he said. The word sounded strained, hurt. Had you hurt him? 

This ship was his home, and you let so much damage come to it. You failed him. You failed yourself. 

He pushed off the ladder, stalking you in the darkness. A thread tethered between the two of you wound tight, pulling you both closer until you were toe to toe. His height forced your neck to bend, eyes searching for something hidden behind the helmet. You inhaled the smell of smoke and gunpowder falling off his body; it smelled like home.

“First, please do not apologize,” he started. His hand came up to cup your cheek, his gloved fingers smoothing your skin.

“Second,” he exhaled, “You are not a murderer. You did exactly what I would ask, and that is to fight.”

You nodded slowly, trying to believe the words he said. It was so easy for him to say those things, but living with them was harder for you. 

“I’m proud of you, angel. So proud.”

More tears streamed down your face. He saw past the destruction, past the pain, and saw right into you. Darkness lingered inside you, and you knew he saw and understood it. You were two souls entangled, lost together within the chaos. He made you feel seen. 

“I’ve held so much inside myself,” you shakily exhaled. “It all just came crashing down. I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t stop myself. I—It was like I was outside of my body.”

“I need you to understand what you did wasn’t wrong.”

Your tears hadn’t yet subsided; they blurred your vision, and all you could do was bury yourself in his arms. Mando wrapped himself around you, pinning you to his body, holding you through each shaky breath. 

You pulled away, his arms still wrapped tightly around your waist. Mando reached toward his helmet with an audible exhale, his fingers curving under the metal. Instinct told you to slam your eyes shut, and that’s exactly what you did. You wanted to see him; you were ready. But it still didn’t feel real. The moment his helmet came off, everything would become a reality, and you’d never have to imagine what he looked like again. He’d officially ruin his loyalty and abandon his Creed, and you still grappled with the selfishness inside you that was taking him from that. Would he regret it? 

“Mando—.” You tried to protest.

He hushed you quietly, and then came the sound of your name. Unmodulated. Raw and real. The sound was far more delicious off his tongue without a filter. Your name was almost your undoing, your eyes watering again and squeezing tighter. He said your name again, now a plea of his lips.

“I want you to see me. Whatever I am without this armor, I am yours,” he confessed. “My loyalty for my Creed is stripped away now. You are my Creed, and all I know is you. Please, angel, just open your eyes.”

Your lips trembled, your cheeks hot and wet from an endless flow of tears that would not cease. 

“Mando,” you whispered. 

A beat of silence passed. “Din. My… My name is Din.”

And there it was: the dam breaking. Your eyes slowly opened, and everything around you ceased to exist. Even in the shadowed darkness, his features began to morph into an actual reality. Here he was— Din—standing before you, stripped bare of his Creed. 

Dark curls stuck to his forehead matted from the helmet, but you yearned to run your fingers through them. They curled around his temples, graying in some places. His skin was tan despite never seeing the sun, and his chin was covered in days-old stubble, greying along the edges of his jawline. And his eyes… maker, his eyes. Pools of chocolate that caught the light even in the darkest space. They were radiant and glowing as you drew in a shaky breath. Everything you had searched for lay within those irises. Soft, warm, inviting. His lips were just as welcoming, the bottom one more pouty than the top, the curve of his lazy smile, everything you had imagined— yet so far from what you had expected. He was beautiful, encompassed in a rough exterior and soft features.

“Din,” you whispered.

His eyes shut, his lips forming a brilliant smile.

“Maker, I’ve wanted to hear your voice say my name for so long.”

Then his lips were crashing into yours, desperate and hungry. This was coming home. Passion, agony, longing, needing. Every unsaid emotion spoken in tongues, searching for each other. Your fingers tangled themselves in his curls, sweat still dampening them as you raked your nails over his scalp. He let out a satisfied groan against your open mouth, and you swallowed every unmodulated sound. Maker, you loved the noises he made. Craved them. Needed them. 

His arm snaked around your waist, the other pulling your leg around his torso. You lifted the other, pressing yourself to him, wanting every space between your bodies to dissolve until there was no telling where you began and he ended. His hand came up to hold your neck, fingers brushing over your skin as he claimed you with another bruising kiss. You moaned against him, feeling his hardness pressing against your body. You met his need with a deep ache in your core, desperate to know the way his face would twist into bliss when he was buried inside you. You wanted to see every face he could make— every emotion. 

You pulled from his lips hesitantly, eyes roaming over a face so new but so known within your soul. Lips swollen, you smiled broadly at him, disarmed and content. This was your Mando. Your Din. 

Din.

Maker, knowing his name, was a gift on its own. 

And the words tumbled out before you could catch them.

“I love you, Din.”

His eyes blazed with profound emotion, softness, and darkness blurring within the gold flecks inside his chocolate pools. His head dipped into the crook of your neck, pressing open-mouth kisses against your neck. You could feel the hum from his chest against your pulse, your thighs squeezing his torso as you quelled the need that bubbled under the surface.

“I love you,” he mumbled, kissing softly against the shell of your ear. “Maker, so much. I love you so much, angel.”

You ran your fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck, tugging lightly until his eyes met yours.

“Then fuck me like you love me,” you demanded. 

He unraveled.

Everything moved in a blur as he walked you back against the wall of the cargo hold, his mouth leaving sweltering kisses down your neck and collarbone. The pain from your injuries still radiated faintly through your body, but you could shove it aside to relish in his touch on you. 

“I need you, Din,” you whined, his lips trailing down your sternum as he pulled down your sleep shirt. 

His mouth ravished your breasts, his teeth grazing over your nipples and soft flesh, leaving bruises in their wake. He was marking you. And you fucking loved it.

You pulled at his soft curls, basking in the feel of his hair through your fingers. You had ached to know how he felt under the helmet, no matter how selfish, and you reveled in knowing every part of him now.��

His lips crashed against yours, his hand coming up to your throat and squeezing lightly. You moaned into his open mouth, and he swallowed every sound you made.

“You’re mine, angel,” he growled. “Fucking love you s’much.”

He pulled you from the wall, lowering you both to the ground without a care to make it to the bed. That was fine with you. You needed him inside you now. Pulling at his flight suit, Din stripped it off in one move, then returned his attention to your sleep clothes. You shed your shirt, hissing at the cold of the floor beneath you. He ripped away at your shorts, exposing your whole body to him. 

Scars and all, he loved you. Maker, he loved you. You would never tire of it.

“I can’t promise I’ll be gentle,” he confessed, his hand roaming down your stomach. You squirmed under his touch, lifting your hips with a whine, hoping he would move his touch lower. “You tell me if it’s too much, okay?”

You nodded, eyes heavy-lidded now. “Give me all of it, Din. I can take it. Just want you now.”

His hand traveled lower, feeling you slick between your thighs already. A groan escaped his lips as he pushed two fingers in, your body flexing around them as he curled them inside you. His tempo sped up, the only noises filling the space coming from your breathy moans as he hit the spot that made you see stars.

“Din!” You cried, clawing at his arms as he pulled the orgasm from your body. Your back arched off the floor, your cunt clamping around his fingers as stars around you exploded.

“That’s my good girl,” he praised, leaning down to capture your lips against his. 

Wasting no time, Din aligned with your core, thrusting to the hilt. You screamed out his name, legs wrapping around his waist as he drew back and plunged in again. His thrusts were hard and brutal, your skin biting against the metal floor. It was piercing and violent, but you drank in the way he claimed every part of you. 

“Fuck,” he rasped your name, his hand wrapping your neck. You took a deep breath before he tightened his hold, drawing the air from your body. 

His pace quickened, his cock bruising against your cervix in a ferocity he hadn’t even shown before. You were entirely at his mercy, unraveling under his hold until another orgasm simmered under the surface.

“Please,” you gasped under his choking grip. 

With his other hand, Din found your clit and began rubbing in slow circles until you were crying for release. His hand squeezed tighter until your vision blurred, and everything but he disappeared around you.

“Cum for me, angel. Give me everything,” he growled, his brown eyes clicking with yours. There was so much fire behind his eyes, hunger and thirst that gazed upon you. 

Your body obeyed, and you thrashed under him, tossed into the current of euphoria as your cunt clenched his cock into a vice. His breath came out ragged as his body tensed with his release, filling you full until he slumped against you. His hand fell off your neck, tangling into the mess of your hair. 

You gasped for a lung full of breaths, your arms snaking around his broad shoulders to hold him against you. With his cock still nestled deep inside you, you kissed below his ear and down his neck.

“Keep doing that, and I’ll never want to stop fucking you,” he groaned, thrusting softly into you.

You lifted your hips to meet him thrust for thrust, your body moving with his. You couldn’t get enough of him, only wanting everything he could give you. 

He was yours. All yours. This mysterious bounty hunter: your salvation and savior. He saw every part of you and still loved you. You would never be alone again in this galaxy, always protected and always loved.

“I love you, Din,” you whispered, stroking his untamed curls. You could feel his smile against your skin, a smile for you and you alone. You’d never tire of his face and the beauty of it.

“I love you, angel,” he sighed.

His cock grew harder inside you, and you could feel an orgasm coiling inside your core again. You were insatiable, just as he was. 

In one swift move, Din had you pinned on your stomach, his hands yanking your hips up until your knees were scraping the ground. 

“Fuck!” You cried as he filled you once again.

His hips connected with yours with each thrust, your cunt sore and crying for release. You could feel yourself coming undone again, a strange feeling unraveling inside you. The orgasm was close; you knew it, but something foreign inside you pushed you closer to the edge. His cock was jackhammering into you, hitting your core at the right angle, and without warning, your body caved into the release, your cunt drenching him. 

“Oh fuck,” he groaned, fingers bruising your hips. “Fuckin’ soaking me, baby.”

You didn’t even have the energy in you to be embarrassed by the liquid seeping out of you as he continued pounding into your body. All you could feel was the wetness rolling down your thighs and his body pressing against you. His hips began to rock slower, deeper, harder until he was cuming inside you with your name falling off his lips. 

Din rested his body weight on you, his hands brushing away the dampened hair from your face. Your breathing was ragged as you came down from your high, your body alight with pain and bliss. With a soft kiss to your temple, Din rolled off your body, hitting the floor with a heavy thud. You turned your head to face him, body slumping into the ground as you gathered your bearings. Your cunt ached from his roughness, yet you still felt insatiable. But your body throbbed with pain from your injuries again, and you groaned into the metal floor.

“Was it too much?” He asked, brushing away the hair from your face. 

You muttered a soft no, curling into his body. The feeling of his bare chest against yours was everything you had dreamed it to be. You ran your fingers up his stomach, tugging at his chest hair lightly before tracing the outline of his collarbone. You were memorizing every inch of his body, too in awe to believe this was real. Lifting your face to meet his, you kissed along his jawline, finding a gap in his scruff where his skin was smooth and warm. 

“You love me,” you sighed. 

“I think I have since the start,” he admitted. 

“Even when I was a pain in the ass?” You teased. 

His laugh rumbled through his chest, the sound of it so beautiful.

“You still are, angel.”

He rolled on top of you, caging you between his muscular frame. He dipped his head down to capture your lips in a soft kiss, coaxing your mouth open to slip his tongue over yours. You let out a small whine, feeling his cock harden against your thigh. You were both so fucking insatiable. 

“I need to taste you,” he moaned. 

Kissing down your body, Din pulled your thighs around his shoulders, careful to avoid your injury. As his head dipped lower, your breath stalled, the slickness between your thighs a devastating revelation into how much you needed him. His mouth trailed further, wet lips meeting your inner thighs. You careened back, your head pushing further into the metal floor.

“So fucking perfect,” he whispered, mouth grazing your wet cunt.

“Please,” You begged.

Wasting no more time, his mouth was on you, tongue devouring anything it could touch. You squirmed at the sensitivity of your cunt, his tongue drawing slow circles around your clit. Strangled groans of pleasure erupted from his chest as you bucked your hips against his tongue, begging for more. Taking control, Din shoved his tongue inside you, gathering every bit of juice leaking out, forcing a wave of pleasure to surge through your belly. 

“Din—.” Your voice was hoarse, a sob choking your words. 

Your pleas were cut off as his mouth clamped around your clit, sucking it until you were shaking through an orgasm. A cry of relief fell from your lips, your thighs clenching around his thick neck, his shoulders keeping them in place as you returned to your body. His eyes peered up at you through dark lashes, a wave of desire flashing through his irises. 

“I think you can give me one more,” he challenged. 

His tongue darted out, licking up your folds and pressing against the throbbing bud of your clit. He didn’t even move his tongue, only applying pressure against it while you fought off another surging orgasm. Your hands reached out to grip his curls, holding him against your cunt as you rolled your hips. His growl vibrated against your body and his fingers bruised your hips as he held you tighter. 

“Ride my face, angel,” he rasped. 

Your body was shaking as you ground your clit against his tongue. You caved in to the feral need to cum for him, your entire body electrified by the sensation of his mouth against you. Your mouth fell open, and you exhaled his name as the orgasm tore through you, ripping you apart from the inside out. Everything was heightened around you; the feel of his tongue lapping at your swollen clit, the stubble on his jaw rubbing against your skin, the soft curls of his hair that intertwined between your fingers. You must have cried through the last orgasm because your cheeks were damp with tears, and you could taste their saltiness rolling onto your lips. 

“C’mere,” you whispered, yanking at his curls. 

Din climbed over you, peppering your sweaty skin with kisses as he made his way back up, burrowing his head into the crook of your neck. Maker, you were the luckiest woman in the galaxy. 

He was yours; body and soul. 

“Din,” you whispered, massaging his shoulders. 

He groaned at your touch, his body weight pressing into you. 

“Yes, angel?”

“Thank you.”

He nipped at your neck, humming against your skin. 

“For what?” He asked. 

“Saving me.” You meant it in more ways than one.

“Always,” he promised.

[starrylothcat]

If you’re still taking prompts, I’d love to see 12.) “Just lay back and let me take care of you” with Wolffe and an independent female reader who does things on her own and struggles to be vulnerable. I know that’s a lot, so please disregard if it’s too much :)

Look After You

Summary: The burdens of being a war medic are weighing you down, but Wolffe is here to comfort you.

Pairing: Wolffe x Fem!Reader. No pronouns used.

Warnings: NSFW, 18+. PiV sex, cunnilingus, feelings of self-doubt / being overwhelmed / compassion fatigue. Mention of death. A lil’ angsty. Soft Wolffe. Established relationship.

Word Count: 2900

A/N: Ohh thank you for the ask, and it’s def not too much! This became a little personal to me, as compassion fatigue is a large issue in my field of work and something I have experience with. It was the first idea I had for this prompt, so sorry if it’s kind of angsty, haha. I hope this is kind of what you had in mind. I hope you enjoy~

Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum: I will know you forever.

Ner ca’tra: My night sky

Wolffe let out a long sigh as he crossed his arms over his broad chest, watching you pour over reports that were splayed across your desk. Wolffe had been standing in your personal quarters for a few minutes now, and you hadn’t noticed.

“It’s time for a break.”

You mumbled something incomprehensible in return, continuing to shuffle through the piles of flimsiplast reports, not paying attention to Wolffe whatsoever.

Your elbow was on your desk, your palm keeping your head up as your tired eyes flicked back and forth between documents.

Wolffe could tell you were stressed, and you have been for the last couple of rotations. You were returning from a difficult campaign on an outer rim planet, and though it was a victory, heavy losses had been sustained. Morale was low on the ship, as it was whenever they returned to Coruscant with less men than they started with.

It hit you especially hard, being a medic for the 104th. You weren’t immune to stress or grief, but you worked efficiently under pressure, not letting your emotions compromise your top-tier medical care when it was needed most.

That’s why Wolffe fell for you in the first place - your endless compassion and sense of duty. Wolffe has watched you save the lives of his brothers, doing everything in your power to give them the chance to fight another day.

Sometimes you worked too hard, Wolffe needing to remind you to rest. You knew you struggled with it, but the thought of being idle meant lives could be at stake.

The war was not stopping, and if you stopped, what were you left with?

These thoughts were troubling you more and more, especially after this mission.

Death was part of the job, you knew that and have fully accepted it. But each death was starting to weigh heavier on your soul, wondering if you could have done more to save them.

You were beginning to doubt your skills, a heaviness on your chest that wouldn’t quite go away.

You wanted to tell Wolffe, but didn’t want to worry him.

He had enough on his plate and didn’t need to be reminded of the losses. At least that’s what you told yourself. You knew Wolffe would want to listen, but you couldn’t bring yourself to talk about it.

The only thing you could do was work, and hope that was enough of a distraction until you got back to Coruscant.

Wolffe cleared his throat, trying to get your attention again, but to no avail.

Wolffe knew something deep was troubling you, he’s noticed your change in behavior the last few rotations.

You've barely left your quarters on the Republic light cruiser you were currently stationed on, and your usual organized space was a mess. Half-filled cups of old caf were precariously pushed to the end of your desk, your bed was unmade, and plates from the mess hall stacked on the floor by your door.

Wolffe wished you would give him the chance to help you, or at least admit something was bothering you.

You were so caught up in making sure other’s needs were met, you often forgot about yourself.

Wolffe rolled his eye, having an idea of what was going on. He strode behind you, placing his gloved hands on your hunched shoulders.

You didn’t even flinch, murmuring to yourself and typing at hyperspace speeds on your datapad.

Wolffe gently squeezed and felt your tense muscles instantly relax under his fingertips.

Wolffe lowered his head toward yours, lips brushing against your temple.

“Can you take a break…for me?” He whispered, digging more into your shoulders, eliciting a small groan from you.

Finally, you broke free from your work, turning toward him, snapping out of your concentration.

“Wolffe, I have a lot to do…”

Wolffe grunted in response.

“So do I.”

You couldn’t help the small, pleasured exhale that left your lips as Wolffe continued to release the tension out of your stiff muscles, planting kisses down your neck.

“You need to rest. It’s an order from your Commander.”

You turned to him, and though his tone was stern his eyes held something deep, a glint of tenderness only reserved for you.

You let out a breath, pushing yourself away from your desk.

You stood up, stretching your aching back, feeling bad for ignoring him. You hadn’t even noticed he entered your room, thinking he was going to be busy with his own reports and meetings the rest of the night.

Wolffe wrapped himself around you, holding you close as he gently placed his finger and thumb under your chin, tilting your head up toward him.

“Ner ca’tra…”Wolffe touched his forehead against yours as you melted against him, only calling you that special name when you were truly alone and speaking heart to heart. “What’s on your mind?”

You were silent, biting your lip that was threatening to quiver.

Wolffe had noticed your odd behavior, and knew you couldn’t keep it from him forever.

“It’s just my reports…” You mumbled, not finding the courage to admit what you were really thinking.

Wolffe grunted as you leaned your head against his chest, hearing his heartbeat. He wasn’t wearing the top half of his armor, so his body heat radiated onto you, a comforting feeling.

Wolffe sighed. “I know that’s not what’s bothering you. You can talk to me. If you’re not ready, I understand. But I don’t like seeing you like this.”

Wolffe felt you tremble against him as you gripped the front of his blacks.

You wanted to tell him how tired you were, how burnt out you felt, how you were doubting your skills as a medic and every soldier that died under you care was a failure on your part.

You couldn’t speak, a small sob leaving your lips as you pressed yourself into Wolffe’s chest, gripping the front of his blacks harder.

The hidden emotion was threatening to spill out, the nagging thoughts you usually tried to keep at bay, tucked deep down where it couldn’t affect your work.

Wolffe stayed silent, rubbing your back as you let out another sob, falling apart in his arms. Though Wollfe wasn’t speaking, his silence was loud and clear.

Tell me, it’s okay.

“I…I’m just…tired. Tired of the fighting. Tired of death. Tired of seeing good men die for no reason.” Your words were muffled as you wept, fully crying into his chest. Wolffe rested his chin on your head, still quietly rubbing your back. “I…don’t feel like I’m doing enough. No matter how many lives I save, it doesn’t matter…”

Your voice trailed off, trying to catch your breath as more sobs waited in your throat, hot tears spilling down your cheeks and soaking the front of his blacks.

“I didn’t want to add to your burdens, you’ve already lost so much -

“Never think of your burdens as less than mine.” Wolffe cut you off, speaking finally. He pulled you from his chest, his thumb tracing beneath your now puffy eye, wiping away the tears.

“How many times have you helped me through my weakest moments?”

You had soothed Wolffe through many periods of grief, times where he was so angry, so devestated, he couldn’t speak, only quietly weep in your arms as you held him, just as he was holding you now.

Wolffe was eyeing you intensely, his brows furrowed.

“You’re always helping others. It’s okay to let others help you. You’re worthy of that, ner ca’tra.”

The stoic and battle-hardened Commander then kissed you so tenderly and held you so reverently, you couldn't stop the tears from welling in your eyes once again.

“I am always here for you. You know that.”

You nodded, leaning into his large, warm hand.

“I know, Wolffe. I’m…sorry I kept it from you.”

Wolffe traced his thumb over your lips. “You never need to apologize, not for this.”

Wolffe kissed you again, this time more passionately, his tongue tracing over your lower lip as you released his blacks and brought your arms around his solid neck.

You opened your mouth fully for his tongue to caress your own, both of you emitting a small groan as your mouths danced.

“You always take such good care of me…” Wolffe rumbled against you, desire now bubbling in his good eye, his hands ghosting at the hem of your tunic.

“Just lay back and let me take care of you. Is that okay?”

Wolffe kissed your neck, lightly grazing his canines on your skin. His gloved hands now fully under your tunic, delicately roaming up your torso.

“Yes.”

Wolffe wasted no time walking you backward to your bed. Your knees hit the edge of the mattress, and Wolffe laid you down onto the plush blankets.

Wolffe’s tight blacks highlighted his wide chest and rippling muscle underneath, his biceps flexing as he quickly removed his lower armor.

To anyone else, he would look immensely intimidating as he peered down at you, his cybernetic eye almost glowing as he drank in your form. Though his expression was as serious as a lothwolf, you caught that tender look again as he climbed on top of you. That look that said I’m here, I’m yours.

Wolffe made quick work of removing your tunic and breast band, kissing down your chest, leaving small marks to remind you of him later.

“Relax.” He mumbled into your skin, still feeling how tense you were. “I have you.”

Wolffe’s lips trailed up the side of your breast and he took one of your nipples in his mouth. He gently sucked and rolled your sensitive bud on his tongue, feeling it harden under his careful ministrations.

You whined, breathing out his name, letting him take full control over you.

Wolffe released your nipple with a pop and looked up at you, his singular eye once again filled with such gentleness you blinked back tears.

You moaned softly as Wolffe took your other breast in his mouth, giving it the same lavish attention as the other, alternating between using his teeth and tongue, gently sucking and pulling at the sensitive flesh.

Wolffe could hear your labored breathing quicken as he worked your nipple, one of your hands grasping his cropped hair, warmth spreading between your legs.

Once Wolffe decided both of your breasts received proper treatment, he continued kissing down your stomach, moving down your body as he did so. Wolffe slipped off the bed, kneeling as he carefully pulled your body to the edge of the mattress.

He didn't say anything as he removed your pants and underwear, taking off his gloves and stroking a finger through your slick pussy. You keened and whimpered his name as Wolffe kneaded and massaged your thighs, staring at you intently.

“You've saved the lives of my brothers, and mine, more times than I can count. Never doubt your abilities, cyare.” Wolffe murmured, still caressing your thighs.

“I know it feels like it’s never enough. Wolffe kissed your inner leg, tracing his tongue over the sensitive flesh. “But it is. I promise.”

Your heart swelled at his words, breathy gasps escaping your lips as he gently probed your pussy with his tongue, focused on licking and exploring, knowing exactly what you needed.

“Wolffe…oh…Wolffe…” He slowly licked a stripe up your pussy, swirling his tongue around your clit, applying perfect pressure as a thick finger slipped into you.

You grasped the bedsheets and bucked your hips as he lazily fucked you with his finger, pressing to the top of your walls to maximize your pleasure.

He increased his pace as he focused his mouth on your soft labia and clit, bringing you to an explosive first orgasm that shook your body, causing more tears to stream down your face.

Wolffe worked you through it, kissing your inner legs again, leaving a warm trail of kisses back up your torso to wipe the tears away before going back down between your legs.

Wolffe continued to take his time warming you up with his fingers and mouth, bringing you to release too many times to count.

Every inch of your body was claimed by him, worshiped by him, your heart ready to burst with every touch.

Your lovemaking was usually intense, not knowing if it was the last time you had together before being apart on missions, but tonight was different.

Wolffe was touching you as if it was your first time, re-learning your curves and dips, slowly drawing ecstasy from your body and leaving you breathless.

Finally, when you were too tired to move, thoroughly blissed by his ministrations, Wolffe quickly stripped himself of his blacks, laying his body on yours. You felt his rigid cock against your thigh, knowing he was probably desperate for his own relief.

You reached down to grasp him, wanting to give him the same amount of attention as he just gave you, but he gently moved your hand away.

“Next time…” he murmured. “This is all about you.”

Wolffe rubbed his cock against your folds, which were thoroughly soaked. “We don’t have to if you’re not feeling-” Wolffe started. You grasped his hair and pulled him in for a kiss.

“I want to. I want you.” You looked up at him, your eyes begging to have this moment where it’s just the two of you, no one else.

You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him in flush against you. “I'm yours.”

Wolffe was so deep inside you, your vision was blurred and you were delirious with euphoria.

You couldn’t speak, every thrust of his hips punching the breath out of your lungs.

Wolffe was talking to you, guttural saccharine murmurs between his own pleasured groans only meant for you to keep close to your heart.

The ever-strong, stalwart Commander, never showing weakness on the battlefield or in front of his brothers, opened his soul just for you in this powerfully private moment.

It almost overwhelmed you, how much he trusted you. You felt guilty for keeping your feelings from him the past few cycles, but as he ravaged your body so devoutly and thoughtfully you couldn’t linger those thoughts long.

Your final orgasm was quickly approaching, Wolffe’s brutal pace not slowing as he felt you clench around him, knowing you were close.

Your knees were pressed into his chest, his cock plunging impossibly further as his large arms caged you in, his fists digging into the sheets around your head.

Wolffe was watching you intently now, observing how your head was thrown back, your mouth open but unable to make a sound as Wolffe gave you everything he had. “Let go, cyare,” Wolffe grunted above you, his end nearing too, your sweet cries and velvety muscle milking his cock becoming too much.

“Let go. I’m here.”

Wolffe’s messily pressed his lips to yours as you fell over the precipice of pleasure, swallowing your cries as your body shook and toes curled at the unbridled pleasure that overtook your being.

Wolffe’s wild pace did not slow, your fingernails digging into his shoulder blades as every thrust of his hips sent shockwaves throughout your body.

Feeling and hearing your orgasm sent Wolffe over, growling your name against your swollen lips, his hips stuttering as his cock emptied inside you. His warmth filled you, leaking onto your sheets as he pumped into you with a few final, shallow thrusts, his back muscles tensing and quivering under your palms.

He pressed his face into the side of yours, his heavy breath tickling your skin as he stilled, laying on top of you, careful not to crush you under his weight.

“Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum.” Wolffe spoke it so quietly, you almost missed it over the sound of your own pounding heart and heavy breathes.

You smiled, repeating back the words, understanding their meaning. You were learning Mando’a from Wolffe, still trying to nail down the correct pronunciations.

Wolffe smirked softly. “Good effort, but you need more practice. I think you told me I was your loving idiot.”

You giggled, feeling lighter now, the burdens of war momentarily forgotten as you lay with Wolffe. “I guess I’ll have to keep saying it.”

Wolffe grunted, a ghost of a rare smile still on his face.

With some effort, Wolffe rolled off of you, your bodies slick with sweat. Leaving you on the bed, he went into your small refresher. You could hear the sound of water being turned on, and he emerged a few moments later, coming back to the bed.

You thought he was going to lay next to you again, but he slid his arms under your legs and torso, effortlessly lifting you up. “Wolffe, what are you…?” You gasped as he nestled you into his arms.

“I’m not done taking care of you, cyare.” He rumbled, striding to the bathroom where the tub was being filled up.

You smiled as he let you down from his arms, stepping onto the cool tile, your legs wobbly from your lovemaking.

“I thought you said you had a lot to do?” You teased as Wolffe stepped into the tub, sinking into the warm water.

“I do, but it can wait. You’re more important than reports and meetings, cyare. At least tonight.” Wolffe smirked, his cybernetic eye flashing, gesturing for you to join him.

You stepped into the tub, the hot water relaxing your sore muscles, your mind finally at ease. You faced him, the steam filling the room.

“Thank you.” You muttered, reaching toward him and running your hand over his scar, tracing your fingers under his eye.

Wolffe turned and kissed your palm. “No need.”

You smiled, leaning back against the tub, sitting in comfortable silence. Your previous anxious notions evaporating with the steam rising from the water.

You knew there were tough days still yet to come for both of you, but at least right now, you could forget.

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[huntershoe]

Can't sleep?

Senior Commander Night x reader

Warning: pure fluff

Exclaimer: Commander Night was made up by artist fishermanarts that you can find on almost every platform.

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I actually made myself cry with this one soo...that's something new. XD

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Senior Commander Night has been awake for a lot longer than what would be considered healthy for a human being, writing reports and signing important documents that required to be sent back to Coruscant. His insomnia kicking in he was not able to go to sleep even after he finished all the documentation he laid in his bunk in only his boxers, starring at the white celling of his quarters. Hours went by with him not being able to close his eyes for not even a minute.

After he reached his limit he let out a loud groan, squeezing his eyes shut he finally stood up, deciding his next move. He dressed back into standard blacks and headed out of his quarters.

His body automatically led him to his General's quarters, yours. He knocked at the doors, waiting for you to open.

It felt like hours before you finally managed to get to the doors and opened them, peaking your head out. You squinted your eyes as the bright lights from the hallway shined on your face. Looking at your Commander you wondered, "Night?"

He looked terrible, well as terrible as one hot man can be.

His eyes showed just how tired he was and the bags underneath were there to prove it.

"I...I can't sleep." Night finally admitted, his usual resting bitch face non existent as he looked at you, begging without any words.

Of course you knew instantly what he was asking for.

You opened the doors completely, ushering him in and he went willingly. You closed the doors, locking the both of you in complete darkness. Grabbing his hand you led him towards your bed bunk, letting the force guide you through the darkness.

You sat him down on your bed, crouching in front of him.

"Off or on?" You ask knowingly.

It took a moment but he finally mumbled an answer.

"Off"

You nodded, despite knowing he could not see so you just squeezed his hand reassuringly and slowly started to undress him. You gently grabbed the hem of his top part of the blacks, slowly pulling it over his head and his hands. You threw the piece of clothing on your chair, using the force to make sure it landed there.

Next was the bottom part and you slowly started tugging down his blacks past his hips. Night gathered just enough strength, grunting as he lifted himself off the bed for you to pull the pants down his legs and off of his feet.

"Lay back cyare." You told him softly and he complied instantly, laying down on his back and pulling himself into your bed.

You repeated the process of throwing his blacks on the chair and then proceed to take off your robes that you hurried to put on when you heard the knocking.

You slowly climbed beside him, into your bed, grabbing the sheets you made sure you were both covered up.

"That alright?" You asked to make sure and he just hummed, turning on his side and sneaking his arms around your waist, pulling you to him.

You felt yourself smile as he buried his head into the crack of your neck and taking a deep breath. You sneaked your own arms around him, one making its way into his hair.

You could feel him relax instantly as you started to massage his scalp and playing with his soft curls.

He let out a puff of air, tickling your neck as he squeezed you impossibly closer.

"Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum ner meshurok." Night mumbled into your neck, and planted a kiss right under your ear.

"Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum ner me'suum'ika." You whispered back and kissed the side of his head.

Night fell asleep after ten minutes, listening to your heartbeat. With a soft smile adoring his lips.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'll be in my bed crying.

Fun fact: I started writing this with full intention on it being pure smut...boy how things turned around.

[wannab-urs]

The Spreadsheet Digest - Vol 28

Hello my darlings,

Welcome to TSD week 28! I read some stuff this week that is definitely going in my all time faves list, seriously. Y'all are amazing. I've got 14 fics for you this week!! (Joel Miller, Frankie/Santi, Ezra, Din Djarin, Dieter Bravo, Max Phillips, Frankie Morales, Dieter/Javi P, Marcus Pike, Javier Peña). Summaries and tags are author provided unless they didn't have them (then I did it myself).

As always you can find all my fic recs here and my masterlist here

Recs under the Baby Cow Eyes

Cosmic Oddities - Din/Joel series by fromthewhales (Ao3)

Summary: Turning a clan of two into a clan of four and asking the very important, albeit unhinged question: What if space dad and apocalypse dad were Weird About Each Other? (ed. note: this summary does not do this beautiful fic justice. READ IT). Tags: parental bonding, parallels, angst, everyone has issues, everyone needs a hug, touch starved din djarin, injuries, strangers to ??? to lovers, smashing the space western and the zombie western together like 2 ken dolls, trauma, crack-fic adjacent at times, hurt/comfort, soft not super explicit smut, self harm, found family, din djarin eventually removes the helmet, blindfold, long distance relationship, survivors guilt, angst with a happy ending, non sexual intimacy, it gets worse before it gets better, alcohol mention, game II canon divergent — but boy does it come close, canon typical violence, minor character death, major character injury, bi!joel miller, bi!din djarin

To be explored later - Frankie/Santi one shot by @legendary-pink-dot

Summary: You and your boyfriend Santi fuck his best friend Frankie and it's a little more MMF than you were expecting -- much to your delight Tags: Swearing, dirty talk, rough-ish sex, hair pulling, oral sex (m receiving), a couple of spanks, edging if you squint, also yearning m/m if you squint, unprotected PIV, snowballing, threesome, dom!Santi.

sweets for my sweet; sweets from my sweet - Ezra one shot by @tinytinymenace

Summary: you are a cook at an exploration camp and one of the miners asks you about Earth and brings you a treat Tags: Brief mentions of planet death (RIP Earth) and strained family dynamics but on balance this is soft.

Release Your Inhibitions - Din one shot by @beskarandblasters

Summary: Shortly after revealing his face to you, Din’s worried about the faces he makes during sex, since he’s never had to worried about that before. You suggest something that might ease his worries; a blindfold. Tags: canon divergent, established relationship, Din is insecure and inexperienced, helmet comes off, blindfolding, oral sex (M receiving), vaginal sex, light biting, creampie, super romantic and loving sex, use of Mando’a words/phrases (Cyar’ika = sweetheart, Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum = I love you, Yooba solus mesh'la = You are beautiful), no use of y/n

Best in Show - Dieter one shot by @covetyou

Summary: The Academy Awards, the most well known, well planned, film award ceremony in the world. So why is the host missing? Tags: dual narrative, masturbation (m), voyuerism, drug reference (our boy is sober but struggling), subby Dieter, slight humiliation kink, very brief mentions of other sex acts (anal play, PIV, cum play), reader talks Dieter through a very nervy wank.

Still Bejeweled - Joel one shot by @janaispunk

Summary: after breaking up with your boyfriend, your self-esteem is crushed. your best friend takes you to your favorite bar to take your mind off of things. there's a band is playing there tonight and the singer immediately catches your eye. inspired by taylor swift's bejeweled – and when i meet the band, they ask, 'do you have a man?', i could still say, 'i don't remember' Tags: no/pre-outbreak au, no sarah, musician!joel, small age gap (reader is in her late 20s, joel's in his mid 30s), reader is described as smaller than joel and has hair long enough to pull, a bit of angst, fluff, making out, fingering, dirty talk (joel talks you through it, i just know it), praise kink, unprotected p in v (i just didn't feel like mentioning it, this is my fantasy world where pregnancies & sti's don't exist, but they very much exist in the real world, don't do this), joel has a big dick (it's canon), consent king joel, rough sex, ass-slapping, hair-pulling

Negotiations - Max Phillips one shot by @prolix-yuy

Summary: Max Phillips never found marketing to be all that helpful. Hell, running an ad on Facebook was easy enough. But then you walked in the door and he knew he had to have you, in all the ways he could. Tags: T, descriptions of male and female bodies, some fantasizing and suggestive themes.

Under the Stars - Joel one shot by @undercoverpena

Summary: joel finds that you become a thing of unnatural order, all ethereal as the moonlight kisses your curves. Tags: post outbreak. smut. oral sex (m receiving). tying joel up with rope. cutting joel free with a knife. p in v. jo's spelling. feelings, but joel-feelings. softer!joel

Apotheosis - Din series by @beskarandblasters

Summary: Din Djarin is a force-sensitive bounty hunter, working for the remnants of the Empire. He's on the hunt for you, an ex-rebel spy who has key information; the location where Luke Skywalker is building his Jedi training academy. But when you're captured, you're not going to give up the location easily. Din will have to utilize “alternative methods” to turn you over to the dark side. Tags: canon divergent, dark!Din, switches between Din and Reader’s point of view, eventual smut, Star Wars lore (not super heavy), manipulation/gaslighting, murder/minor character death, no use of y/n

Home - Frankie series by @dancingtotuyo

Summary: Frankie always comes home to you. Tags: fluff, angst, girl dad!frankie, recovering!Frankie, references to drug use, references to violence, trauma, healing.

Met the Devil Last Night - Joel one shot by @pedgito

Summary: I made a joke about wanting to screw dirt-covered Joel even if he was deep in the trenches of hell and...well, yeah. This is pure filth and nothing else. Tags: Porn with minuscule plot, if you willfem!reader, demon!joel, no specific age gap since dude is a literal demon, but reader is early 20s and I picture Joel to be his younger self (around 36), mentions of su*cidal ideations, this all a completely made up concept pls don't come for me about rituals, ect i will cry. virgin!reader, reader's father is a priest and horrible (just a total douche)/mother isn't alive, spitting, oral, unprotected piv, blood drinking, competency kink, innocence kink, mutual masturbation

Pearl Rosary - Din one shot by @sweetercalypso

Summary: Priest of Mandalore!Din Djarin listens to your sins during confession Tags: public(ish) sex, finger sucking, deepthroating, cock worship, facial, reader is a Mandalorian who takes her helmet off, so much religious imagery

Good Boy - Dieter/Javi P one shot @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

Summary: Dieter gets cucked. That's it. That's the fic. Tags: cucking, PIV, creampie, oral sex f receiving, cum eating, PWP/plot what plot?, dom!Javi, sub!dieter, idk what reader is... having a good time?

Whatta Man - Marcus Pike series by @atinylittlepain

Summary: He's looking for something other than vanilla, and she is more than happy to provide such a service to him. Tags: this is smut, pegging, rimming, sucking and fucking, sex work, lowkey sugardaddy!marcus, sweet shy marcus getting his world rocked, and then pancakes and a blackberry and a black american express card so ya know, the works.

----

Self Promo:

in the a.m. - javier peña loose fit series

Summary: Between sleeping with informants and getting in bed with Los Pepes in the fight to bring down Escobar, Javier Peña also finds time to be with you. Wrestling with crippling self hatred, Javi tries and fails to keep his blood stained hands off of you. Based on some of my favorite Arctic Monkeys songs <3 Tags: smoking, probably shit spanish, smut, angst, established situationship, emotionally unavailable!Javi, references to past arguments/past hookups because this has been an ongoing thing and I love to start in the middle of a story, loose fit series, trauma, probably, sad!Javi, self hating!Javi, Javi very briefly picks you up, Javi crying, Javi yelling, reader yelling, did I mention angst?

[kociamieta]

happy birthday sto lat [briikase gote'tuur] feliz aniversário joyeux anniversaire [ni kar'tayli gar darasuum] et ton art [balyc] 💥💥💥💥💥🎂🎉🎂🎉🎂🎉🎂🎉

hello tumblr user aliettali . have some cake

[femmefighter]

I'll be greedy and ask 2, 6, 17 and 18 for the Fic Writer Asks 😘

Alright, I'm loving @btwxsixesandsevens 's idea of using these as a 'writing warm-up', so let's see how this goes!

2. Do you read/reread your own fics? Yes, very much so. It sounds conceited perhaps, but when I started my WIP, there was next to no Sokabine content whatsoever. So I literally went, "stuff it, I'll do it myself". I'm writing the story/stories I want to read, so yes I reread my own work. It's also great to come across horrible spelling or grammar mistakes and be like, "SHIIIIIIIIT" *RACES FOR EDIT BUTTON*. 🤣

6. Are there many fics you reread all the time? You bet there are! I especially read WIPs over and over, either when a new chapter is up to double-check what was going before moving on with the story, or just because I'm loving where the author is going with the piece; I love cheering them on with comments and I want to keep reliving it and wonder where the adventure's going next. I don't reread the completed multi-fics so much (but I do sometimes!), but I do love rereading some one shots! (I feel less guilty doing so coz they're shorter!)

And since we're here, might as well do some special shout outs: WIPs: Heart of a leader, soul of a rebel  by @halepo ; Crimson Dusk, Cerulean Dawn by @loevawrites ; Splintered Realities by @calyxborealis and Dreams and Madness by CarboniteCass Multi-chaptered fics: chaos, yet harmony by rain_sleet_snow ; Rid'alor by albedobrave

One-shots: what strange dreams have we shared by October_sky ; In Her Mouth an Amethyst by @ambiguityisnoonesfriend ; Love So Alike by @tatooinesun2121 ; Ka'rta Ve'vut by @kanskje-kaffe and never know what to say (but you get it anyway) by lostresidentevilpotter 

Decadent smut fics for dessert: Mesh'la by @machinerismsx ; ni kar'tayli gar darasuum (i will know you forever) by @augustfiction and pretty much anything written by @armoralor but especially Homecoming, Built to Wreck and Here & Now 

17. What's something you learned about while doing research for a fic? Well, my favourite concept (from Legends) was about Togruta blushing through the darkening of the stripes on their montrals and lekku! So the fact that Ahsoka blushes blue just makes me 😍 But I think the most interesting thing I've discovered is Operation Cinder, the world-killing revenge mission for Imperial remnants after the Emperor dies - and even though I haven't found anything to confirm it yet, I reckon Mandalore was victim to this operation. 18. What's one of your favourite lines you've written in a fic? Ugh, that's a hard one. The title of my WIP, Reach Out and Feel Me, is probably my favourite line to slip in. Maybe that's a cop-out. Fine, lemme think... Alright. A paragraph from Ch 18 of RO&FM, Sabine talking to Ahsoka: "The person I wanted to learn how to wield a lightsaber from I thought was dead. I resented Kanan because he wasn’t you, and I was horrible because of it.” ~~~ I dunno, I love that whole chapter of the first time Sabine has a lesson with Ahsoka in lightsaber sparring.

Well that was fun! Sorry for the avalanche. Guess I'm well warmed up now! Thanks for the ask 😘

[touchstarvedasclones]

I need to say something...

I've seen people writing 'ni kyr'tayli gar darasuum' and 'ni kyr'tayli gar sa'ad' for I love you and adoption vows in Mando'a.

But isn't it 'kar'tayli'?

kyr means death. [Edit: Kry'am means death, kyr is just 'end'.]

kar'ta means heart.

It's 'Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum' for I love you, or literally, 'I know you in my heart forever.'

'Ni kyr'tayli gar darasuum' means 'I know you in death forever.'

Basically, 'you are dead to me.'

Maybe others are using a different dialect than me.

[lauramkaye]

Mando'a is for Lovers, Part 1

So, you want to write a Mando romance? (Sure, we all do!) And you think conlangs are Neat and want to include Mando'a for some flavor? I cannot blame you, friend! They ARE neat! But you're getting kind of stuck because Mando'a seems to be like 80% made up of military or weapon terms and/or insults?

I AM HERE TO HELP.

But I'm gonna have to do it in multiple posts because um. I might have a lot to say and am really kind of a language nerd as it turns out.

SO this one will JUST be some helpful hints for specific words and phrases that could be useful in trying to write Mandos being lovers not fighters (at least at the time.)

Please let me know if you'd like me to write more of these (grammar basics, handy hints, translation help etc.) or to expand on any points, me and my ADHD hyperfocus would LOVE TO HELP.

(Note: I use mainly Mando'a from mandocreator.com because I like their online tools the best. A "dialect" of Mando'a is basically "one particular conlang hobby group that has made up some words that don't exist in the official sources." Other Mando'a dialects are available.)

Anyway, so, first thing:

You can't just write an English sentence, look up each word in a Mando'a dictionary, and then string those words together. Translation doesn't work like that. What you get will almost always make no sense - like those things you see when someone runs a sentence through Google Translate a couple times and then puts it back to English. This is doubly true because Mando'a was created to give flavor to books and video games and doesn't have anywhere near a complete dictionary, so a lot of the time you won't even be able to FIND the word you want.

This is how you get characters calling someone "my to hold in the heart forever."

There are many conlang nerds (myself included) who would happily help you figure out ways to say what you want to say, but for a shortcut:

Look below the cut for help with terms for: love and marriage, beauty/hotness, pet names, and compliments. Bonus: some vocabulary for getting frisky.

Love and Marriage

If you want someone to say "I love you" (the VERB form of "love"), use kar'taylir darasuum which means "to hold in the heart forever." You will need to CONJUGATE this like so:

I love you: ni kar'tayli gar darasuum You love me: gar kar'tayli ni darasuum I love him/her/them: ni kar'tayli kaysh darasuum

If you want to call someone "love" or "my love" ("love" as a pet name/endearment), the word to use is cyare (loved one/beloved) or possibly cyar'ika (darling/sweetheart). Your spouse/committed partner is your riduur. To get married, you say/swear/vow the riduurok. (NOTE that the riduurok is not 100% equivalent to a modern US marriage but this is the vocabulary post not the Mando Culture Meta post. Hit me up if you want me to make the Mando Culture Meta post.)

If you have read more than 2 or 3 Mando fanfics you likely already know about the riduurok but here are the vows, for completeness:

Mhi solus tome, mhi solus dar'tome, mhi me'dinui an, mhi bajuri verde. (We are one when together, we are one when apart, we share all, we will raise warriors.)

If you want to talk about love as a CONCEPT (the noun form of "love") you're going to have to reword it somehow, because Mando'a doesn't have a canon word for that. A few suggestions: 1) reword the sentence to use the verb form 2) use another word, like guuror (to be fond of/to like/to hold affection for). Mando'a also has the very handy intensifier prefix ori-, so you could also say ori'guuror to mean "to like a lot/to be very fond of/to hold great affection for." 3) Think of another way entirely to say the thing you want to say, one that there ARE words for. (You have to do this a lot in Mando'a honestly.) 4) Use a metaphor. Mando'a is a very poetic and metaphorical language where the same words take on different meanings based on context. 5) use words relating to knowledge and remembrance. In Mando'a the concepts of love and remembering/knowing someone or something are VERY closely related.

Attractiveness

A couple related concepts here. Also note that if you are writing Mandalorian characters, they will have Mandalorian standards of attractiveness, of which physical appearance tends to be a lot lower-ranked than in modern Western culture. When you are part of a historically nomadic warrior culture in which most people wear armor all the time, you're gonna care a lot less about what they look like than what they act like and how they ARE, as a person.

Beautiful: mesh'la Very beautiful: ori'mesh'la More beautiful: mesh'lashya The most beautiful: mesh'lane

Note: for all these adjectives, you can add ori' to the front to make it "very [thing]", shya to the end for "more [thing]", and ne to the end for "most [thing]". Attractive (not relating to physical beauty but attractive as a person for other reasons): copyc

Don't mix copyc up with copik'la, which means "cute" but should only be used about animals and small children, not adults. (unless it's a pre-negotiated kink thing but let's save that for the advanced lesson.)

See also the section on compliments for other qualities Mandos find appealing and might use to sweet-talk someone.

Pet Names

cyare (love/beloved) and cyar'ika (darling, sweetheart) are the classic go-tos here. If you are married you can call them riduur (spouse/life partner). You could also use ner kar'ta (my heart), which I would argue works well in Mando'a since the way you tell someone you love them is literally to tell them that you hold them in your heart forever. The heart is actually very significant in Mandalorian culture generally; the elongated hexagon you see used in their designs and in the chestplate of their armor is called the kar'ta beskar (beskar heart) and is a culturally significant symbol.

A note on "-ika": using the suffix "-ika" forms a Mando'a diminutive meaning something like "little [thing]" with an affectionate connotation. Hence cyare (beloved) becomes cyar'ika (sweetheart, darling.) You can do this with names: you add -ika to the first syllable, so Jango would be Jan'ika, Din would be Din'ika, Boba would be Bob'ika. (Note- you can fudge the "first syllable" thing to make it sound better and be easier to say. "Bob'ika" flows better than "Bo'ika" but I think it's easier to say "Gro'ika" for Grogu than "Grog'ika.") Note that -ika is a lot like the Japanese -chan in that it generally connotes something young and cute more than something adult. So don't just deploy it at random. An adult calling their adult lover "-ika" is kind of like, say, calling Steve Rogers "Stevie" or possibly even "Stevie-poo" - it definitely can happen but there's a certain vibe to it that you might not always want. But you could still use it in conjunction with any of these other terms - like you could call someone your kar'tika (little heart) and get the point across.

If the person is being formal/poetic/archaic you might see them use ner runi (my soul), though this would not be commonly used by modern Mandalorians; think of it as like.... using terms from Shakespeare to compliment someone. It can work in the right context but it could also sound really pretentious.

There isn't a canon Mando'a noun that means "treasure" or anything similar, but there are adjectives for "valuable" (waadasla) and "important" (jaonyc) so you can work from there if you're flexible with your phrasing. (You can actually transform words in Mando'a into other parts of speech quite easily--there are simple and standard rules for doing it--but that's another post.)

You'll also see mesh'la (beautiful) used, though I tend to think that Mandos wouldn't emphasize physical beauty so much as other qualities they like, such as:

Other Things A Mando Would Compliment You On (could be platonic or romantic)

Being mandokarla (adjective) or having mandokar (noun) means basically "having all the qualities that make an ideal Mandalorian." The dictionary definition calls this "a blend of aggression, tenacity, loyalty, and a lust for life."

Having shereshoy (noun) - this is the "lust for life" referred to above, but that's a shorthand translation. Shereshoy is a Mandalorian cultural concept that means "the enjoyment of each day and the determination to seek and grab every possible experience, as well as surviving to see the next day - hanging onto life and relishing it." (a nice parallel for those who ship Mandos with Jedi is to the Jedi concept of being in the present moment!)

Loyal - verburyc (adj)

Stubborn/tenacious/enduring - atin (adj)

Aggressive (not necessarily negative) - verd'yc (adj) (note that "verd" is "warrior" - this is aggressive in a culturally valued way for Mandalorians and might also be used the way you'd use passionate, ambitious, etc in English. OVERLY aggressive/rude/intrusive would be something like "akaa'naryc" which has a connotation more like starting fights/instigating war.

Clever/intelligent - mirdala (adj)

Brave - kotep (adj)

Good - jate, very good - ori'jate, best - jatne.

Ramikadyc - this is one of those words that needs cultural context to really define. Verd is "warrior," Ramikad is "commando," and ori'ramikad is "supercommando" which is the term for elite special forces. Ramikadyc -literally "commando-like" - is defined as "an attitude that he/she can do anything, endure anything, and achieve the objective. A blend of complete confidence and extreme tenacity instilled in special forces during training. Can also be used informally to describe a determined, focused person." (Side note: ram'or means "to attack" and "kad" is "sword" so ramikad likely originally just meant "swordfighter." Possibly because you need more training to be effective with swords and blasters than blasters alone, this came to refer to a more elite class of soldier.)

Kandosii can mean both indomitable and ruthless, while kandosii'la means stunning or amazing.

Strength - a couple different words here. Kot (strength) and kotyc (strong). Dral, which means strong or powerful but can also mean bright or glowing. This leads to the question- how do you know which word to pick when there are multiple ones with the same or similar dictionary definitions?

My go-to is to look for other words that have similar roots, or canon phrases that contain one of the words, and use that to figure out the connotation/flavor/nuance that distinguishes the words from each other.

So for strength - do you use dral or kotyc?

You see the "dral" root in a few places: Dral'Han (the Annihilation - a more literal translation would be "bright annihilation" or "bright oblivion" and it is a reference to the glare of the orbital bombardment of Mandalore), draluram ("bright-mouth", a term for spicy food), and the phrase "nar dral'shya." (try harder/put your back into it.) The "kot" root appears in kote (glory), kotep (brave), kotir (to defeat, to overpower), and alli'kote (a clan's reputation.) From this, it seems like you might use "kotyc" to talk about physical/martial strength or strength that leads to victory or reputation, and "dral" to talk about more innate or existential kinds of strength/power.

Okay, so you can give the sweet-talk. What about the SPICY talk? (because Mandalorians love spicy food? get it?)

Some Potentially Useful Words For Sexy Stuff

naritir (v) - to insert, to put, to place. Note that if you wanted to do an imperative you would add "ke" to the beginning.

narir (v) - to act, do, put

Nar dral'shya! (phrase) - try harder, put your back into it. (We talked about this phrase above when discussing dral. "shya" at the end means "more [thing]" - it's the equivalent of adding "-er" to an English verb - so "dral'shya" here means something like "more powerfully". The "nar" is likely from narir (act/do/put) but could potentially also be from naritir (insert/put/place), so I think that it's quite possible for this phrase to have a double-entendre connotation something like "shove it in harder.")

Words for body parts - (note, in Mando'a you make a word plural by adding -e to the end if it ends in a consonant and -se if it ends in a vowel)

Hand/hands - gaan/gaane Finger/fingers - cer/cere Buttocks/ass/rear - shebs (note that this is referring to one entire butt; there isn't a word for a single buttock. "shebse" would be "asses" aka the butts of more than one person.) Arm/arms - irud/irude Chest - haalas (there is no word for breasts) Thigh/thighs - motuun/motuune Face - troan (this word also means "mask") Eye/eyes - sur'haai/sur'haaise

Words for THOSE body parts - okay look the Officially Licensed Star Wars Expanded Universe material isn't big on telling you how the GFFA says "cock" so you're going to have to use some creativity here.

Mando'a in general uses gender VERY rarely (in Mando'a, everyone's pronouns are they/them) and when it does, it's mostly in reference to like, animal husbandry. It's generally not going to be very well received to call someone jagyc (male) or dalyc (female) in a sexy context. It's more a medical/scientific thing because in Mandalorian culture biological sex is only relevant for medical/scientific/agricultural reasons and gender only matters in so far as it personally matters to you but is culturally largely irrelevant. Probably Mando OB/GYN vocabulary exists but it was apparently not deemed relevant to the Republic Commando tie-in game and novels that most Mando'a was developed for.

That said, there are definitely crude, Shakespearean-esque jokes including swords and sheaths and such - but these would be considered kind of raunchy and not something that everyone would appreciate. Anyway the words here are:

Kad (n)- sword, saber Dalab (n)- sheath, scabbard

And if you want some verbs, Mando'a has THREE words for stabbing: chekar, kalikir, and bikadinir. Chekar means to stab with a small blade - think "to shiv." Probably not the most complimentary metaphor but some people might be into that. Kalikir is to stab with a narrow blade - "to skewer". Bikadinir is to stab with a broad blade - "to run through." The way that these metaphorical uses might be interpreted are left as an exercise for the reader, ahem.

Big (and little) - Big is "ori" and small is "kih". In addition to using them on their own, you can also use them as modifying prefixes, where they CAN mean physically big or small but can also mean the equivalent of "very [thing]" or "slightly [thing.]" Note that "kih" (at the front) is small/little with no context about how you feel about the thing being described, while -ika (at the back) is a way to say "little" with an affectionate, cutesy vibe. So your ori'vod is your older/big sibling, your kih'vod is your younger/little sibling, and your vod'ika is your little sibling (affectionate.)

Hard (and soft)- you probably want muun (hard as in a surface or material) rather than urakto (hard as in difficult.) Soft or yielding is pel; do not use laandur (fragile) as that is considered an insult.

Tight (and loose)- sadly don't exist, but you can probably use novla (closed/shut) and tenn (open) to get the job done here.

Hole - palon is "hole." surdol means "an opening" or "a window," you could likely use this in a sexy context. I've seen people use "shebs'palon" to mean "asshole" but YMMV.

Hot (and cold)- hot is nadala, but this refers to temperature only. Hot as in attractive you want copyc, hot as in physically appealing you probably want mesh'la. Cold is ciryc.

Wet (and dry)- wet is piryc, dry is haast.

Show - tenganaar is "to show" or "to display" with a root from "open hand" (like you're showing something in the palm of your hand.)

Want - copaanir is the verb "to want." Me'copaani? is "What do you want?" or "what would you like?" vercopaanir (literally future-want) is "to wish" or "to hope" and vercopa is a wish or dream. If you say "Vercopa" followed by a statement, it means "I wish that/may it happen that." So like - "Vercopa mhi me'dinui an" would be "I want us to share all." Vercopa can also have a connotation sort of like the one when someone says "I'm manifesting this" - like, you are urging the universe to make it happen for you. The related word copad (noun) is an ambition or desire.

Okay that got really long but I hope it is helpful to someone! Because I've spent way too much time thinking about this. :)

[setaripendragon]

Sunlight by Hozier - in Mando'a

If you remember this post where I translated I See Fire into Sindarin, you probably won't be all that surprised by this. I've fallen head-first into the Star Wars fandom (admittedly second-hand, but still), and of course, being me, I went straight for the conlangs. Mando'a might not be the most fleshed out language of the GFFA, but it is the one with the most Culture, at least in the fandom, so it's the one I gravitated to. And honestly, I really like how... brisk it is? It drops unnecessary pronouns and verbs, barely bothers with tense at all, and contracts everything. It's so much fun to play with.

Sunlight isn't the first song I started translating into it (that would be Born For This from the Spiderverse movie), but it is the first one I've finished, because matching Mando'a to English scansion is hell. It struck me as a very Codywan song, which is why I picked it to translate (yes, I do imagine Obi-wan composing/singing it in honour of Cody pretty much every time I listen to it).

I did have to make up a couple of words because the dictionary I use didn't have even a near-equivalent to the concept I was looking for, and those will be marked with a * and I'll add the 'etymology' of them at the end. (If anyone knows any other Mando'dictionaries, throwing me a link will win you my undying gratitude.) I also had to get creative with my interpreations of the meaning of certain lines, since, just to pick the most obvious example, Mandalorians probably don't have the myth of Icarus like we do.

Any feedback, advice, or just general linguistics flailing is always welcome. Now, without further ado, here it is:

Tran'nau* (Sunlight)

Ni ru'nevor nau (I shunned the light) Ru'medinui naak be ca'tra (I shared in the peace of night) Ni nu'mirdi ba'slanar (I wouldn't think to leave) Par tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (For sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Tion'ad karta nu'redal (Whose heart doesn't dance) Dar'shekemi tra be ca'tra (Wouldn't abandon the stars of night) Sha solyc hettyc haa'it (At first burning vision) Be tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Of sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Ni r'echoyla ba'gar, tran'nau (I was lost to you, sunlight) Ru'miy sa kisen* ba'gar, tran'nau (Flew like a moth to you, sunlight) Ner tran'nau (My sunlight)

Gar kar'tayli tran'nau (Your love is sunlight) Gar kar'tayli tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Your love is sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Gehat'ik arasuum (The tale remains the same) Ru'rejor bal ven'rejor (Told before and told again) Runi ru'got* lo ciryc pitat (The soul that's born in the cold rain) Kar'mir tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Knows sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Mar'e lis dinuir gai (At last I can give a name) Ba tracin haaranovyc (To a hidden flame) Sa kar'tayli darasuum (As love/knowing forever) Ner tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (My sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

An tengaana ba'ni, tran'nau (All that's displayed to me, sunlight) Ratiin kar'mir ba'ni, tran'nau (Is always known to me, sunlight) Ner tran'nau (My sunlight) Gar kar'tayli tran'nau (Your love is sunlight) Gar kar'tayli tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Your love is sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Gar kar'tayli tran'nau (Your love is sunlight) Gar kar'tayli tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Your love is sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Tran'nau (Sunlight)

An ner alii'gai* lo gar gaan solus (All that I am is in your hands) Ke'juri ni ulyc, ner tran'nau (Carry me carefully, my sunlight) An ner alii'gai* lo gar gaan solus (All that I am is in your hands) Ke'juri ni ulyc, ner tran'nau (Carry me carefully, my sunlight)

Antuur* mhi cuy tome (Everyday we exist together) Kar'mir gar ner shereshoy (Know that you're my reason for living) Ner oya bal kyr slati* gar (My life and death belong to you) Ner tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (My sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Narbatir* sen'tra (Wearing a jetpack) Kyr'nayl'gam* briikasyc (I'm death-trap clad happily) Galar carud ni trattokor (Spilling smoke I fall) Chur tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Under sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Gar kar'tayli tran'nau (Your love is sunlight) Gar kar'tayli tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Your love is sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Gar kar'tayli tran'nau (Your love is sunlight) Gar kar'tayli tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Your love is sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Gar kar'tayli tran'nau (Your love is sunlight) Gar kar'tayli tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Your love is sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Gar kar'tayli tran'nau (Your love is sunlight) Gar kar'tayli tran'nau, tran'nau, tran'nau (Your love is sunlight, sunlight, sunlight)

Tran'nau (Sunlight) Tran'nau (Sunlight) Tran'nau (Sunlight) Tran'nau (Sunlight) Tran'nau (Sunlight)

[*tran'nau = tra (star field)/tranyc (sunny) + nau (light)] [*kisen (moth) = kih (small) + senaar (bird)] [*ru'got (born) = ru- (past prefix) + goten (birth)] [*alii'gai (identity) = aliit (clan)/aliik (sigil/symbol) + gai (name). This is technically already a word that means 'colours', but I took that to mean specifcally the colours one wears on their armour, the 'face' they show the world, i.e. their identity.] [*antuur (everyday) = anay (every) + tuur (day)] [*slatir (to belong to) = slanar (to go) + ti (with). I took the inspiration for this from the etymology of the word 'belong' in English.] [*narbatir (to wear/to put on) = narir (to put) + bat (on)] [*kyr'nayl'gam (death-trap-skinned) = kyr (end/death) + gaanaylir (to trap) + 'gam (skin). Since beskar'gam is literally 'metal-skin' and the word for skin literally translates to 'soft-skin', I figured it could also be poetically used to mean 'clad in']

[kalevalakryze]

Not really a question and not to be dramatic, but Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum.

That is all. Have a good day, burc'ya 🙃

🥹🥹🥹 ori'vor'e, burc'ya! gar sol'tan! shereshoy!!!