#new ship = new insecurities
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Hey everyone, just a small update.
I’m at lvl 99 in the MSQ, just finished the lvl 99 trial, and I’m close to finishing the 7.0 MSQ. I’m happy with that because I can’t wait to properly come back and share stuff with you all again.
But besides that, I haven’t been in the best mindset today due to IRL stuff, and on top of that, I’ve been feeling pretty scared of sharing my new ship for Yume and I am overall feeling bummed. I don’t know, I was so happy earlier because I was actually writing for the first time in months, and now I am doubting myself, especially because this ship is going to be so greatly different from anything I’ve tried writing before, and that freaks me out. Ehhhh I guess I needed to get these thoughts out. I probably just need some rest.
Anyways, I hope you all have a great rest of your day/night/whatever time of the day it is for you! 🥰
💖 ~ Hali
#ooc#new ship = new insecurities#especially when I’m known for the wholesome mutually aligning idiots in love that are Hali x Aymeric#while Yume and her new partner are the exact opposite#idk I think I need sleep
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Initial drawings of that old man… I literally, I haven’t finished reading the book of bill yet!!! I had to stop and take a break for a week to feverishly draw fanart of myself petting fords floofy hair and giving him attention and shit…!!!! The urge was too great….!! I’ve literally. I had a crush on this guy the instant he was first REVEALED in the show, but I did not have the artistic prowess to draw good looking old men back then… but I do now… thank god… thank fucking god
#gravity falls#ford pines#stanford pines#self ship#self insert#si x canon#it me#doodles#I got a haircut! so my hair looks different now.. as haircuts tend to do lol#anyway… yeah… I LOVE HIM… GRAHHFJH#the confirmation that he rlly is just sad and lonely and insecure and craving attention and validation#OHH FORD BBY.. WE R THE SAME#like… ghghg i loved him already just w his prickly nerdy outer shell but knowing more about the vulnerable center is GREAT. ITS AWESOME#also hes a smart nerdy guy who can do science and expirements and shit which is ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS FOR A CHARACTER TO DO#u kno im all about scientists….#I couldn’t draw ship art back then 1 cuz I didn’t kno how to draw old men and 2 cuz I was like 13 lol… which would have been wierd#but I’m an ADULT NOW. GET OVER HERE FORD#also it didn’t even rlly cross my mind TO draw that stuff cuz even tho I did love ford#self ship and x reader sorta stuff was not NEARLY as popular back then.. like I specifically remember it like. booming in popularity#at some point. but being pretty rare before that. anyway. thank u passage of time and trends and new gravity falls book for introducing#me back to fictional man I love. so I can now draw myself smooching him and shit#hell yeah.#13 is probably not actually correct I do not remember exactly which year fords reveal was in…#but I was probably older then 13.. but still#the point remains lol.#also omg. the bit in the book w the goth moth. ‘ur probably into this sorta thing right?’#I AM INTO THAT SORTA THING FORD. thank u book of bill for being written specifically @ me. the immersion it’s great.#like ur so right ford I AM edgy and goth how’d u guess that tee hee. eyelash flutter#aLSO PLS IGNORE MY FINGER BEING IN FRAME IN THE LAST PIC. I was drawing in a tiny bound sketchbook#so I had to hold the paper down to keep it flat. and. I didn’t feel like censoring my fucking. pinkie finger out of the image
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I will never get over "Alastor hating strangers' touch, being neutral to the touch of his trusted circle, and seeking out the touch of his partner".
#hazbin ships#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#radioapple#because he makes a statement#because he likes them happy from his touch#because he needs his sense of grounding and control#because its new#because so much trust is wild to him#because he challenges himself to not be defeated by his own insecurities#because he is not used to this sense of security and comfort#and hates how much he grew to crave it
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While Roy would argue that the leaky faucet in their apartment adds to its ramshackle, rustic charm, Jason doesn't share the sentiment. The persistent dripping is white noise to Roy, but for Jason it's an irritant. It's a reminder of home and a childhood Jason would rather forget - a too small apartment that was rundown and falling apart, all stained surfaces and broken fixtures because no one cared to take care of anything. Jason doesn't want to live like that again. It's why Jason does so much to keep the place up despite Roy's absence because it's not just a safe house - it's their home.
Which is why when Roy comes home and is greeted with that steady drip, he grimaces. The leaky faucet is something Roy promised to fix months ago and promptly forgets about between so many other responsibilities, but he resolves himself in that moment: today is the day.
Guilt and shame are strong motivators and Roy feels an ample amount of both if only because the place looks as good as it does. Everything is clean and smells fresh in a way that makes Roy feel at ease and yet here he's left Jason to suffer with a faulty sink.
The old saying of, 'happy wife, happy life,' crosses Roy's mind and while they're not married, Roy resolves that he needs to do better by his partner. If not out of love, then certainly because Roy isn't sure he could withstand being at the forefront of Jason's provoked ire.
It's not a hard task. Challenged as Roy likes to be, he finds enjoyment in the straightforward nature of the problem and the clear steps needed to resolve it. Compared to the other work he does, it's mindless and it's something of a relief.
That he's going to get brownie points with Jason is an added bonus.
Jason, who walks into their apartment that's been empty for months while Roy has been tied up with Justice League missions and bureaucracy to find his partner on his back, crowded into the cabinet beneath their sink finally making right on his promise to fix the damn plumbing. Jason, who sees Roy following through and preens about it because the poor kid is all crossed wires and fucked up associations about the men in his life taking care of shit like this. Jason, who comes home and straddles Roy's hips like he's done so often in the past, casual and alluring - the menace.
It takes all of Roy's willpower not to react. For as often as Jason tries to seduce Roy, Roy has been painstakingly mindful to not take advantage. Making Jason happy and flirting around is one thing; letting him believe he has to pay Roy back for fulfilling a promise Roy made months ago and forgot about is another.
"You gonna help?" Roy asks instead.
"Depends on the plumbing." Jason quips, grinding his ass back against Roy to tease him and-
Bang!
It feels good until it doesn't. Roy sees stars for too many reasons and all he can think is that this was karma coming to bite his ass for 1) not fixing the sink sooner and 2) being tempted by the vixen that is Jason Todd.
The weight on his pelvis is gone in an instant and Roy groans in disappointment. Just because he won't come on to Jason doesn't mean that he doesn't enjoy when Jason tries to seduce him. It's his guilty pleasure, fuck!
"Shit, are you okay?" Jason asks through an incredulous laugh, dragging Roy out from beneath the sink by his calves. Roy goes easy, one hand to the bump on his head from hitting the pipes beneath the sink. Jason looks both embarrassed and sheepish and Roy can't say the kid has ever looked more gorgeous than in that moment, hovering over Roy with cool fingers pressed to the swelling bump just beneath the edge of Roy's hat. "My bad," Jason snickers, knocking his knuckles just shy of the hurt.
Roy makes a face at him and, just to tease, torments him with a lighthearted taunt: "Kiss it better?"
The mood has come and gone though, so all Jason gives Roy is a smirk and a pointed kiss to his own hand before he smacks it over Roy's head.
"Maybe after you finish with the sink." Jason says, gesturing to the broken pipe, courtesy of Roy's forehead. Roy turns his attention to it, lips pursed because wow, fuck. That's another trip to the store.
"Since it's your fault-" Roy says and Jason scoffs. Still, when Roy holds out his hand, Jason hoists him up. Roy smiles at him, easy as anything, "-come get the parts with me."
Roy loves the work he does. He's happy to do it, but he's missed this; he's glad to be home.
#royjay#jayroy#words#some sort of au where there's romantic tension but jason has a bit too much going on and roy is tries to be responsible but is also thirsty#and jason is aware of this and sometimes uses it but other times nah and other times still gets insecure about where the relationship stand#this gives big age difference vibes#and now all i'm thinking of is barely contained sleazy roy and small no lazarus jason#my new favorite trope:#is it bros being bros or a ship setting sail?
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the fandom sees megumi interacting w someone feminine presenting and suddenly it’s an onslaught of thinly veiled misogyny
#jjk leaks#the panel is so harmless like it’s obviously not that serious…….#itfsh shippers are insane and a huge collective and yet so insecure when someone else is brought up like chill#nobody said they were going in that direction#‘don’t they know hes gay’ SHUT UP!!!! THEYRE JUST TALKING#and also the nobara erasure i’ve been seeing is crazy like ppl cropping panels of the three of them just to focus on itfsh 🧍🏻♀️#SHES RIGHT THERE#news flash for the freaks: u shipping mlm doesn’t absolve u of ur misogynistic and fetishized takes#i hate this fandom so bad
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Was thinking about the spiderman kiss,, I drew one with Toshinori years ago and this is the reimagining of it and it kinda makes me think how far things have come since then! 💖💖 (original drawing/close up/etc. under the cut)
Last image drawn in 2016!! Its crazy seeing how I drew myself back then and how I lined and colored things 😭😭
#artfarts#self insert#self ship#self shipping community#my hero academia#mha#bnha#yagi toshinori#all might#self insert x canon#❤️ scars and stripes 💙#i ALMOST completely overhauled my self insert tbh. the only thing thats the same is the healing power#but from the way she looks to her personality and her role in the story + toshis life and their history together...idk its crazy#i went from this insecure kid (like seriously i didnt just LINK the og drawing from my other blog bcs it was so self deprecating 😅) to this#a more proactive character and tons of thought put into it and also im hot n sexy and milfy now 😚💖💖#when i got the idea to redraw this this way it was like 10 pm and i was like OPE and immediately rushed to sketch it#im pretty happy with it!! and i tried a little something new for her wings lemme know if yall like it
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maybe if usopp had actually discussed his feelings and insecurities with his friends instead of lashing out, maybe the fandom wouldn’t be near unanimous in their disdain for his actions in w7 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#i’m just saying man#like i get it#he’s insecure in his position amongst the strawhats#the death of the merry reflects the death of his mother#etc etc#but never once does he ever bring any of that up#instead he accuses his friends of not actually caring about him and thinking he’s a nuisance when they’ve proven time and time again that#that’s not true#granted i haven’t finished w7 nor gotten to ennies lobby yet so my opinion may change#but rn i think he was being a dumbass who let his emotions get the better of him#cause personally if i wa stuffy i would have reacted the same god damn thing#you wanna leave so bad? you want to sail on the grand line with a ship that’ll sink before you reach a new island? be my fuckin guest#rant over#one piece#water 7#spilled milk
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The very first face Milo saw on their first day at work was, of course, Diego, the very person who recommended Milo for the job. Milo knew Diego from university classes - he and his best friend April kind of adopted Milo under their sociable wing.
Diego hasn't been having a good time lately - he was forced to drop out of the university and his athletic program after getting injured, and was currently recovering and trying to get into the firefighting academy. However, Milo envied Diego's ability to always stay positive, no matter what. Well, at least in public - who knows whether Diego would shed some tears in the privacy of his home. Milo hoped he did, for his own sake.
Diego: Milo! Hey, buddy! Nervous?
Milo: Duh. When am I not?
Diego: Okay, remember, you have nothing to worry about. Actually, today's predicted to be a rather quiet day, so you will have just enough time and space to get accustomed!
Milo: ... thanks, Diego. Although, my neverending pessimism doesn't one hundred percent trust the "quiet day" thing.
Diego: No, I promise! Tuesdays are always like this. Would you go to the water park on Tuesday?
Milo: ... no?
Diego: Exactly.
#sims#ts3#sims 3#Electromagnets#milo caspar#diego aguilar#new character alert!#fun fact: at one point during the brief absence of irene in the verse which we should thank lennias for#because she was replaced with eden but then eden became a different character and I missed irene and brought her back as a niece of tobias#milo and diego were supposed to be an item#I still ship it just a teeny tiny bit they were cute but they do really work better as friends#mirene are just irreplaceable for me#at the time I did have some insecurities about irene and a crisis over my verse and generally wasn't doing well mentally#it wasn't her fault at all it was just me doubting myself and everything I've ever done so I thought it would be fine if I switch things up#and like I didn't particularly *want* to remove her but the verse had to be restructured for lennias#but it never the same without her and I missed my girl so I just switched up some parentage and brought her back
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Milkvans on Twitter < 48 hrs ago: Byler stans HATE El, they just pretend they don’t. At least us milkvans are honest about hating Will.
New tumblr account < 2 hrs ago: El is useless and she should die. Also Will has powers.
#byler#me a willel twin truther: am i a joke to you?#honey#sweetheart#if you hate will then hate him#no need to project onto bylers to feel better about yourself 😭#we love el in these parts#get used to it#you aren’t gonna find anyone wishing death on el or anyone in the party here quite frankly#give it up#you ever think that hating Will vehemently is probably not the way the show was intended to be watched…?#and if you feel that way you’re probably watching it wrong?#same goes for el#theres a reason bylers don’t hate el to the degree milkvans hate will#you guys feel threatened over a ship…#ppl only get hostile and start harassing complete strangers when they are feeling insecure#unbothered ppl stay in their lanes and eat their food in peace#maybe go do the same instead of stressing yourself out by projecting hate with pettiness#im willing to bet the antibyler account and this new one are the same person..
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Feeling very normal about how Johanna and Kaisa essentially stand on opposite ends of the 'magic affinity' spectrum
(That being - Johanna's always running from it, but it always finds her despite all her efforts to stay firmly on the normal side of every situation. Kaisa is always running towards it, but feels like she's a failure at it and that it slips through her fingers when it matters the most)
#kaisa is working the most mundane job a witch can while still acting as a witch. its a source of insecurity#johanna has literally done everything to lead a normal ass life. there's a new Creature at her house every two weeks (that shes aware of)#sketchbook ship#kaisa hilda#johanna hilda#sketchbook ship hilda
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while the only redeeming quality of love god really is the stan joke, it does emphasize how bad mabel is at matchmaking and also how much romance sucks actually
#the end to it still feels weird!!! and going 'oh but actually its all ok!!!' in supplementary materials doesn't make it feel any better!!!!#altho hilariously that means the snadger are soulmates all along#....ok 2 there are 2 redeemable things about that ep cos it gave ford that other hilarious mabel drawing in tots#anyway robbie's actual issue is that he was a terrible boyfriend!!! and didn't respect wendy at all!!!!#he let his insecurities get in that way and he constantly felt threatened by a kid!!!! rebounding off someone else fixes none of this!!!!!#also i have soooo much beef with the northwest ep especially cos of the mabel b plot#she and her friends deserve better than this???? romance in this show sucks!!!!!!#like the a plot isnt inherently bad but what it ended up sprouting into annoys me!!!!#(also the mood of 'dipper shouldve just gotten mabel and the girls out and ran lol')#(the ep needing the 4 of them to get attacked otherwise a lot of folks wouldnt give a shit about the ghost)#anyway another reason why bill sucks is cos he ended up undoing preston's face that coward#too bad those eps are necessary just so robbie and paz are on friendlier terms with the pines#(but meanwhile a wendy ep is too much to ask for :////)#also thinking about how mabel's love crazy phase is relatively new....#one day she'll get better taste in ships#i wonder how much the disney censors were shaking at the wompers joke#cos part of them being like 'NOOOOO THATS TWO GUYS' but also like. thats a pig duct taped to a goat.#they were probably pissed at mabel having a pride sweater on tho#roadside attraction was poorly timed and having it be all about being pickup artistry kinda sucks#but its still way better than love god lol at least we have dipper and stan bonding moments and candy got a hero moment#also stan no longer being sensitive about his brand
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The best part of being in a polyship with P.rompto and N.octis is the fact that anytime I see art of the two kissing I'm immediately all "Fidngkdjfkdk My bfs!!! <3 I'm so happy to see them kissing and being happy!! They're both the best!"
#pan rambles#More often than not seeing ship art (with canon characters) of my f/os makes me feel a bit :(#Which means I'm suffering gamers#because my two F.inal F.antasy 16 crushes have canon romantic love interests so I gotta see a lot of ship art😔#Makes me feel a little insecure about possibly shipping with them#(Although now that I think about it...A lot of my ff f/os have a love interest. 😔 It's a curse I guess)#(I get new f/o at the cost of feeling a little inferior to their canon love interest)#but Ahem! where was I? oh yeah by BFs!#I love seeing P.rompto/N.octis ship art! Makes me happy!
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Megaman Ships
Don't read this if you're expecting me to mention Classic or Starforce at all.
My ships... I have art stashed but it's really weird. The environment of the internet has shifted drastically over the years, and I think some people take things too seriously. But... I ship things. I'm not trying to make a big deal about it, just want to gush about the stuff I like. :) (and don't like)
The X series
I really love the X series to bits! I actually don't ship any of the characters here. I think they're all precious in their own way, though. X and Zero, as a kid, I never really shipped.
But I guess things change over time.
Some people make some wondrous content showing how close the two could actually be. It's endearing...
I don't like Iris's writing or how some people insist she's The One To Ship With Zero. Even if it's suggested like... in minute ways, I just... dunno. It feels like the devs wanted people to ship X and Zero but it was too GAY so they made a female X and said "have at it." Which... is so weird? Everything Zero could've liked about Iris, we see X exhibit those exact traits, AND MORE. It could be the "Zero just might be a heterosexual so he isn't into X", but I mean, if Dmmd taught me anything, it's that seeking out female versions of the guy you're totally not into doesn't work out.
Alia is a cool character! Reducing her to simply X's flat and 2D love interest was... depressing. I loved how she had a kill streak in x6! It made her super interesting. Idk what happened in... was it x8? Like, get that game away from me.
Axl is a cutie pie but he's more husbando material than he is shipping material for me. He just wants to sit at the cool kid's table and managed to nab a seat...
I dunno.
Layer is hot tho ha
aha
haha
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The Zero series
I lost my fucking mind with this series. I went from "I don't ship robots in this cool game" to just mix and matching everyone in every which-way.
Some weirdo freaks got me into shipping Omega Zero with Copy X. Do not ask how that is logical or what could possibly be their dynamic. I just like the aesthetic. It makes no sense. They didn't coexist in the same room. Ever.
Ciel x Fefnir is like my guilty ship. Most of my AUs seem to naturally form some sort of organic bond between them subconsciously. Fefnir, though a hot head, seems like the kind of guy who's a good sport. I like the idea of little ol' Ciel crushing on the football player lookin guy, and he thinks that she's adorable in her own right. You know - X's whole inherent love of humans or whatever I probably made up. That's my justification.
I obviously ship Harpuia and Zero.
Where some people find cyberelf X and Zero to be top shelf, I raise the offer "yes but he can actually touch Harpuia without absorbing him like every other cyberelf". (I will admit I love shipping Cyberelf X with Zero in that very strange maternal-esque "I will embrace your corpse so that you may rest forever" edgelord shit. I snort it daily don't worry.)
Harpuia rescuing Zero for no Fucking Reason in z2 fucked me up. Why'd you do that? What'd you do that for? You picked him up and rode on your shitty little bird to drop him off at the correct address, so you even knew where Ciel and friends were staying? Right after Zero off'd your beloved X? Yeah? You did that why? (I know it's probably related to that whole chapter where Harpuia is nearly a better ruler than Copy X and just makes all the right choices in contrast to his previous ruler blah blah blah) But what if it's because he has programmed into him the same unbreakable love for Zero (platonically) that X had? We know that the guardians get some sort of weird high when fighting Zero so... why not further fuck up that interpretation of X and Zero's relationship?
I really like portraying Harpuia as being the only one who didn't completely cave in and go bonkers from battling Zero. He just sort of kept it inside. Poorly. And it comes out in small amounts via weird actions. Leviathan I portray mostly as a kid with a magnifying glass over some ants, Fefnir as the kinda guy to just be an adrenaline junkie, and Phantom thought it was a flaw in his programming so he blew up.
Cyberelf X and Copy X is GOOD SHIT MM THAT'S SOME GOOD SHIT 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌there👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit
My only justification of it is either Cyberelf X hates his guts or is Copy X's only friend. And Copy X's emotions are already fucked up like every other inch of his programming.
Ciel and Copy X though I ship them in a familial sense. He's obsessed with protecting her and Ciel is like "I made him! :)" I've got some pics lying around (they're gone) of Ciel reading ancient books to Copy X while he lays in her bed at night. She says it's to help him sleep, but since that isn't How Reploids Work, he's really there to pretend to fall asleep when he notices Ciel is about to. Then when she passes out he stares at her all night, stroking her hair. Like a freak. But please, it's not romantic; I do not want it to be at all. I just want him to be weird.
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ZX series.
Get your tomatoes ready. I'm finna make an ass outta myself. ;(
OG Prometheus and Aile is a new ship. I can't... explain this one? I don't know.
The AU I'm writing has Grey retreive the original body plans for Prometheus and Pandora from the lab he was made in, near end game before Prometheus and Pandora bite the bucket. Presuming that Flueve and friends aboard the Guardian can make bodies themselves (fuck you I don't think Ciel was making new bodies for everyone solo), Grey asks Aile if they can give Pandora and Prometheus a second chance, since they're likely controlled by Model W. She says "what are you smoking". I just like Grey to be selfless in the dumbest ways imaginable.
Pandora and Prometheus dies. I think it is stupid that they get left behind, so I imagine that he used model F megaman form thing to drag them out (like how Aile should've done herself in the first game) flops their corpses at Aile's doorstep and is like "I got the EC to pay for this." And shenanigans happen. They rebuild their old bodies, do some wacky techno shit with their DNA and put it in the new bodies akin to how reploids age in canon (assumption). Prometheus and Pandora wake up as normal ass people.
But they're also lowkey enlsaved by the Guardians because like uhh um uhh ummm "you owe us. but forever" and they're ok with this and something about duplicating model w don't ask It's fucking stupid I'm insecure about it but they can megamerge into their old forms but aren't allowed to go ape shit and prometheus and aile become sorta close in that antagonizing way because she has to watch him closely while pandora hangs out with grey like a little brother and it's all warm and fuzzy and they have no problems (i stole the idea from the stupid japanese site's weird little roleplay things) that's her little buddy you know and don't worry about it i just ship aile and prometheus
My Girouette ships are off limits. I'd be sentenced to death.
I ship Siarnaq and Grey because my AI roleplay partner shoved it onto me with rose prose and I was like "... you know what? this will work". My ship count is being dominated by the sheer number of AUs and oneshots I've written about those two. Ask and I will divulge
some
of them. But otherwise I'm mmgngngjghgngmgnggnmgngm Really Grey being an unaging kid complicates things. I'm pretty sure he doesn't have a life span, and I do not subscribe to the "reploids naturally grow" head canon because it's pretty stupid to think technology got that far when it was stated in-game that it isn't. that's like Legends shit.
I ship Thetis one-sided with Aile because it's Extremely Funny. No other reason.
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Legends series
I don't really ship anything I just think everyone is precious and adorable. I Guess I like the dynamic between Tronn Bonne and Volnuttsack. It's neat. I don't think about it beyond seeing it on the screen though.
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Exe Series
Uh. Hm.
I just really like Megaman.exe himself. I don't ship anyone consciously...???? I think I just admire them all from afa-
No
I ship Zero.exe with Zero.
I ship it really bad.
#lana please shut up#text post#this post was inevitable#i've been putting it off for so long and it's spilling into the wrong channels#i started garbling at my brother about it and he could be heard raising his eyebrow#like little girl i am not intersted in your female habits#please seek that affirmation elsewhere i am not it#but he did at least agree with me that iris is a poorly written character#ciel x zero is okay - i get it's canon to a degree at least one sided#i did think that ciel scavenging zero's body to make girouette and his eyesight was fucked by the impact but she didn't want to fix it#because it's ZERO'S EYES OMGGGG seems like a silly thing#and then alouette pinning after him even after she gets her new body as prairie#that jives with me#idk why i didn't mention it above but man that's just really cute#i know alouette had a thing for zero but#i also wrote her as being insecure about not being able to grow up#and ciel started working on her new body but after zero died she still wasn't finished#and that fucked alouette up#and so ciel decided “i'll finish alouette's new body AND put zero back together”#and you see how that turned#out#if you don't ship neige and craft we actually factually can't be friends#they're the perfect love story#get you a man that can snipe a political leader from outerspace and is likely 7 feet tall#yeah sure there wer ea fuck ton of casualties but thats ok he meant well
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hhhhh
#vent#mousey talk#moment i wanna put that i dont want doubles on my twt dni but im scared of what like#my new friends will think abt it#idk if they know yumes so well#so im scared of them julding me and finding me weird#i DOUBT that will b a double since the fandom is small#but even sooo hhhh#i just like Boron sm :(#im already insecure with yknoe his other ship#so im hhhhhh#i dont need to b more insecure
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*sighs in rarepair*
#yup it’s that time of the week where I vent in the tags about who knows what lol#You’re looking at me and you’re wondering who this is about#This is about me writing Sparrow x Nicky in Lawless lol#(Lawless is an ongoing fic of mine)#(Er technically Nick not Nicky- Nick Close? Yeah you know the one)#WHICH WAS ALWAYS THE PLAN#It’s not like a ship I’d want in canon per se (but then very few are) but idk they just give me Fiona and Marshal Lee vibes lol#But yeah not a new rarepair of mine in fact a pretty old one I just don’t talk about it cause literally no one else wants it LOL#And so I guess#idk in the context of the fic it’s like#The problem for me isn’t people not caring for the ship#Rather it’s the fear of them being turned off from the fic altogether due to its presence#But like I said this was always the plan (not that we’ve gotten there yet in the story)#So for me it’s part of the story#And it’s *my* fic#So yes I’m still gonna write it in#But idk I guess the thought of it all gets me a bit down/insecure#That’s it!#that’s my little secret lol#And now you know too#Person who decided to read my tags#It’s a silly thing to be down over really#But sometimes we get down over silly things#c’est la fucking vie!
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one of the things i’ve noticed that changes between this series and the last is the newfound emphasis on diplomacy & decorum. i do understand why, both in how the narrative changes w the introduction of new ideas and frameworks as well as how it might want to adapt to have its own voice, themes, etc. but gone are the days of yes-anding oneself into strange situations and in are those of yet another scene highlighting the importance of a letter of introduction—and that was personally a huge reason why i liked the original series so much. i don’t even mind like diplomacy as a narrative device when it’s equipped in interesting ways but when it’s constant introductions to new characters that go relatively similarly every time & a very clear narrative voice insisting that original solution wouldn’t work when it’s 1. more interesting to me personally and 2. not even working any better practically, then that starts to get super boring
#personal#even when i was a middle schooler reading these books i was never much a fan of the roman camp but i just didn’t have the skills or words#to put together why. i think a lot of it comes from this. because i certainly enjoy the characters a lot but this aspect just makes them#very boring to read about. i’m invested in the characters’ emotional lives but when it comes to practical stakes i find it draining & dull#which i want to emphasize is not my natural response to these things being present. it’s these specific characters in this specific world#written by this specific author that makes it not really my thing in this instance#bc stuff like political intrigue is probably my favorite type of conflict (besides like deep personal ones) and yet i’m SO picky in how it’s#done and so the stuff i like i really like#but it’s also very hard to come by#that’s not the only reason i struggle with it. i think esp coming into the third book (i’m a little under halfway through)#that it’s a bunch of things: the huge cast that sticks with us the whole time (i do like how they’re constantly broken into smaller quests#like i think that’s well done but it’s just so many characters to deal with for so long)#the rotating perspective. the emphasis on relationships (and how that’s framed w/i the text. shadow & bone s2 did something really similar#to this). etc. but yeah. in good news: the writing is much improved from tlh even for the characters i really didn’t likes’ perspective#chapters. i do think the way the cast is broken up is good and so is the conflicts between them (with some exceptions. insecurity in#relationships is kinda boring to me but so are ships in general so that’s not a surprise). there are still characters i don’t like but they#are much improved by this book (although you can basically figure out which ones i like vs. don’t based on which book they first appeared in#in this series).#so yeah that’s my review so far :p we’ll see if i stick with it because i remember not really enjoying the next two books either when i#first read them. but my tastes have changed a lot (i say. keeping nearly my exact same rankings thus far)
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