#never mind please continue
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"IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A JOKE" As someone who's been playing TWST since march and stopped going out of my way to be spoilerfree after I got stuck at Overblott!Jamil? That's honestly been one of my favorite things about it - seeing something in fanart or a comment you think is just fans joking, only for it to be canon. "The economy!", "May I also throw a tantrum?", Malleus' gargoyle thing, and... everything about Rook being my top examples.
there's a whole bit in Trey's platinum birthday card where he goes on about how he became increasingly obsessed with mustard for like a week straight until the other students held an intervention. how are you supposed to talk about this. how can you bring up something like Trey's descent into mustard obsession to the point that the other characters are worried for him without it sounding like the most obvious lolrandom "he mentioned it once and now fandom acts like he puts mustard in everything" joke. also, how can I slip this into every Twst post from now on, because I need everyone in the world to know that this is a real canon fact about Trey "I'm just an average normal guy (who sticks my hands into people's mouths and owns 20 toothbrushes and used to eat flowers off the side of the road)" Clover.
for bonus points, 1) the punchline is that he still doesn't even like mustard that much, 2) he's saying all of this to Leona, and 3) Leona is actually kind of invested in Trey's mustard story for some reason, which is the most unbelievable part of all of this to be honest. (then Trey gets distracted by a painting of the Cheshire Cat and Leona takes the opportunity to powerwalk away to freedom before they can start talking about dijon versus spicy brown or whatever and extend this bit even longer)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#platinum jacket birthday#sorry that this ended up as me just talking about trey's birthday story for...about as long as trey talked about mustard. whoops.#i have said it before and i'll say it again though#the birthday cards have the best and most insane lore and i love them#especially for trey. he wants us to believe he's just some ordinary dude SO bad but he also keeps saying shit like this.#although to be fair as soon as rook enters the building the weirdness bell curve gets immediately fubar'd#so i guess it's all relative#me any time the characters brush off the most whackadoodle bonkers nonsense: why are they not questioning...oh wait#this is a universe in which rook exists and is a real person that they know#never mind please continue
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Experimentation (Patreon)
#Doodles#UT#Handplates#Sans#Papyrus#Continuing the theme of memories and what Gaster ruined for them haha#He doesn't even have to be here and he's making their lives harder! Par for the course#Lots of things have the potential to trigger their memories - a familiar smell or a food they recognize#But there were so many things they never experienced and sifting between them is very difficult!#Especially considering most of what they ''remember'' is actually just their Reaction to Something - like the smoke smell making them tense#Sans here getting a Reaction for sure tho - being questioned and experimented on does Not feel good#It's Papyrus doing it so that's one thing but even still - not having fun with this#Papyrus is so curious! He wants to know! He always seems to be a bit left out on finding things out haha#Sans being the more science-minded of the two probably has an impact there - ask your brother he'll help figure it out#Unless he really doesn't want to because it feels weird please stop (lol)#Still tho being asked to eat things as an experiment? ''oh hey bro maybe going to grillby's will remind me of something'' ''SANS'' lol#Papyrus didn't mean anything by continuing to ask questions he's just curious!#Sans goes to write down the results and then feels Even Worse so scribbles them out#''don't tell me what to do!'' directed nowhere in particular#Tries really hard to put it out of him mind A Lot#This remembering business sure is uncomfortable!#Look what you did Gaster you took a perfectly fun data-gathering session and turned it into something they'll need therapy for!
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IS ANYONE ELSE FEELING KIND TODAY!!! IS ANYONE ELSE FEELING GENEROUS TOWARDS OTHER PEOPLE!!! IS ANYBODY ELSE BEING KIND AND TRYING TO UNDERSTAND EVEN WHEN ITS HARD!!! IS ANYONE ELSE ASSUMING THE BEST OF OTHERS INTENTIONS AND RESPONDING IN KIND!!!! CAN ANYONE HEAR ME
#having a day ^_^#I love being kind I just wish other people loved being kind more#people on the internet are SO FUCKING MEAN TO EACH OTHER???? its a terrible phenomenon#I have never seen people in real life treat others badly with the horrifying proportion of hate I see online#please. try to be kinder try to be more patient even when its frustrating#I have changed minds and deescalated arguments SO many times by being kind.#if someone is spouting misinfo in a furious rage and they're saying hurtful things? try responding with patience and kindness#even when you don't feel they deserve it. because one of 2 things usually happens#EITHER. they immediately shift their tone because you're talking to them like an equal and not an idiot#OR they continue to be horrible and it makes them look really nasty. its not a good look!! most people won't do the second thing!!#hateful online arguments has turned my mental health into a disgusting stew in the past#since I started being kind out of sheer frustration my mental health has improved a thousandfold#listen. sometimes its okay to be mean. if someone tells you to kill yourself I dont think its appropriate to give them patience and kindnes#BUT. if you treat someone like they're stupid. even if you're right!!! they won't listen to you or consider your words!!#because admitting you're right means admitting that they're stupid like you think they are. that feels bad so people won't do it#my wisdom. today I am so tired
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Fellow fanfiction writers, say it with me:
"It doesn't have to be good. It doesn't have to be done. It's just something I do when I want to have fun."
#don't be scared or guilty when you get a comment on one of them when you're currently focusing on a different one it's a trap your mind is#setting so you end up giving up on all of them don't listen to it!!!#appreciate your readers' anticipation and use it as writing fuel not water to douse the fire#why am I saying this? surely not because I can relate. I never get stressed over my fanfics after all. really#*digs a hole in the ground and sticks my head in it*#the fortunate thing is that the fic I got a “please continue” comment on is under anonymous and therefore the commenter won't know I'm#working on my sclass one.#okay I'm literally contradicting myself right now sorry don't mind me just being an anxious root crop#bff.txt
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this might be another genre of posts that only i understand but. am i the only one who gets annoyed when ppl say they like their faves purely bc they're 'unproblematic' 😭 purity culture hurts my soul bc i see ppl time and time again care way more about the absence of mistakes (i.e. perfection, which mind you is impossible) than actually doing good or trying to improve yourself. and nine out of ten times their faves aren't even 'unproblematic' (or what fits their definition of what they believe to be unproblematic) they have said and done things in the past that were either wrong or hurtful bc newsflash we have all made mistakes or misspoken before. its just that with creators specifically, some were lucky enough not to have their mistakes broadcasted to a huge audience, and some were not.
i just hate the fact that some ccs can say or do smth mistakeningly and they're never seen as redeemable by ppl like this no matter how much they grow and change as ppl, or apologise or make amends, because even though the person they are now is different than the person that made that mistake, in these ppls' eyes they will be tied to that mistake forever, because of the fact that what is put on the internet stays there forever. especially when continually brought up and circled around even many years later. and every time i've seen that happen it's done for malicious intent, not because these ppl actually care about the cc improving as a person.
#ramble thats been on my mind since joining my second ever rpf fandom. not really about anyone specifically#i keep seeing ppl say 'my unproblematic fav' and i just. cringe so hard. please stfu no one is pure no one is perfect 😭#it feels like such virtue signalling like look at me im so good im a fan of someone who's never made a mistake ever. like bitch no what 😭#we all make mistakes but. what matters to me is putting the effort to try and better yourself. not the complete absence of mistakes.#mainly talking about one time mistakes - if ppl say/do hurtful things and refuse to apologise and/or continue doing it. thats different#purity culture
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i will never be over how narratively tight the opening cutscene to psychonauts is. like, it's all there, hiding in plain sight, first 7 minutes of the game. absolutely wild to me. cannot overstate the degree to which it puts its own soul on display
youtube
#please play psychonauts#i've probably made some iteration of this post dozens of times over and guess what. i'll never stop. continually losing my mind#the way i have this shit memorized#psychonauts#video#Youtube
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People ask me how I listen to The Crane Wives’ songs without crying every three seconds at how relatable the lyrics are and my honest answer is to gaslight myself that the text only fits my ocs and other fictional characters and not me nope no siree only oc animatics being thought up over here
#i have had easier on repeat for the past day or so and like guys believe me i’m so fine#it’s not relatable at all it doesn’t make me want to cry and rip my hair out whatsoever no no#silly ocs would do that but never me :]]]]#cable’s txts#the crane wives#(< guy who is losing his mind at ‘’i learned to take / i learned to keep / please tell me someday#/ i’ll at least be able to sleep’’ PLEASE. someone stop me from continually listening to this song)
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a small tidbit about writing with me: if you just want smut, this is not the blog for you.
#i like to write smut. it's great! 80% of my fics are smutty fics!#but if i get the inkling that rodrick is just a way to get you (the writers) kinks out? that's a soft block from me.#it's incredibly obvious when you come to me about a certain kink and then i see you approaching other male oc's for that very same kink.#telling me that you don't mind slowburn while actively jumping from first meeting thread to smut thread is obvious.#don't do that.#you may not think it's obvious but it really is. and it makes me feel like shit because it's all these folks ever want.#i never make these posts but holy fuck please just stand by what you said and stop using male oc's for your own (obvious) kinks.#everytime i come back to rodrick there's always one person who uses me for smut and it feels like absolute shih.#slow burn only now.#folks who rock with it will continue rocking with it. those who don't want to? they don't have to rock with it.
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Working with cops professionally is *so* weird
#not like. professionally for them. professionally for me#dude came in to be added to his mom’s account and opened by throwing a fit#because they’d had to go to *so* much hassle to get his brother there too even though he lived out of state#please keep in mind mom’s og account had been hacked and hacked badly#and we’re a one state credit union#so like. no I do not have digital verification options do you know how expensive those are????#plus! *I don’t know any of you personally* I’m not in fact taking your word for it you are who you say you are#like what the fuck that’s how crime happens#also he keeps throwing in he’s a cop like that exempts him from id requirements which is in fact a very cop thing to do#we finish up the appointment (mom loves me and says so to my manager) and he sticks around for some tech support#1. I am not tech support#2. he needs *apple* tech support not bank tech support#3. I do not work for apple and never have#he continues???? to bring up how he’s a cop?????#I tell him I can submit a tech support ticket and follow up but like I can’t make any promises#‘okay well the girls at the other branch said that too and promised-‘#my guy I did not promise you shit I do not make promises I can’t keep#and my tech support? is also not apple tech support#also my tech support can’t fix my ability to send secured messages so like. i don’t like your chances
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#really sorry that several big options slipped my mind and i realized only immediately after posting when its 2 late#obviously he can be aro ace etc etc etc.#please shave your head and tell me about it.#PERSONALLY i think in my hc continuity where hes a trans guy he was completely 🤐 abt being trans (presented himself as cis guy) + out as bi#and in hc lines where hes a cis guy hes questioning/closeted bisexual at time of applying to typhon#the trans hale hc. TO ME. relies on him being so strongly believing in it with such conviction#that he got his nervous self thru everything he needed to do#and after all that itd probably be easier for him to accept other facets of lgbt internality too#WHEREAS. TO ME. the cis dude hale hc relies on him never truly questioning his gender bc of the#societal pressure to Not Think About It Too Hard. and so sexuality as well is much more out of his grasp#fwiw (folga wolga imoga womp) i ran a poll on nsfwalt if ppl think hes ever had sex pre typhon and no is winning lol#I THINK YES TBH!!! but its interesting to see the takes....#sayerposting
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So I've decided to ignore sleep tonight (though it's already 6am so whatever), because several reasons I won't get into. Anyway I'm reading Prince Lestat and I am LOVING it. There is just so much lore?! So many new characters, fascinating characters?! A whole world of vampires whose stories are connected or totally not to the Coven of the Articulate?! There's just so much.
In my last post, about how I skipped quickly Blackwood Farm and Blood Canticle, I wrote that I was finding it academically fascinating to read several decades worth of an entire literature world in the span of a month only. To continue in this vein (pun intended), reading PL after having binge-read the original VC books is a deep dive into how history has sped up since the 80s.
I'm not just thinking about because I'm reading Gregory's chapter and that's what he's observing, and also because the changed world and what it means for vampire society ("the tribe", and how I adore that terminology) is the big main theme of this final trilogy. It's something I've been thinking about since TVL at least. How for how these novels pertain to the horror and the fantastic genres, they are also a mirror of the society and time during which AR was writing. And because she kept writing decade after decade, and kept observing the world around here, each new book is its own little observation about the early 80s, then late 80s, then first half of the 90s, second half of the 90s, and now we're right smack in the middle 2010s and these immortal characters are feeling the weight of this rapidly changing world.
And it makes me think of actual human beings born in the 40s or 50s, or even 60s, or my own grandfather born in 1931, and how, just like a lot of these vampires recounted in PL, they sometimes can't follow all the changes brought in the last three decades (the biggest thing is technology, intradiegetically Lestat himself saying he keeps forgetting how to use his smartphone, but extradiegetically, it's how AR writes "to go on the computer" and other phrases like that, that sounds weird to the ear of someone who's grown up with this tech). And AR was over 70yo when she wrote PL, so I'm imagining that she was also writing her own impressions of this 21st century world that she saw developing under her eyes.
And in light of all the historic events we live week after week these past handful of years only (the 2020s want to bury us), it's quite interesting to apply that way of thinking to our generation too (millenials and younger, the 80s-90s-early 00s kids). Saw a post earlier saying "do you think one day we'll get to live in precedented times", in answer to the classic "we're living in unprecedented times", and I think of how the VC are the stories of one handful of characters in a world full of other characters who are not or relatively not concerned by these big stories. And how the Coven of the Articulate is considered as legendary amongst the rest of vampiredom, while they themselves don't really realise their fame, or when they do, they reject it. And how in the actual world, there are still a huge percentage of the world population that's not concerned at all by things that here make us all go frothing at the mouth because "omg we're witnessing history". Yes, "we" are witnessing something that will appear in the history books, but it is so because we have decided to put ourselves in the narrative. So many people are not even caring a little bit about big news that seem so important to us, because their lives have other matters to care for. And it's not that they're wrong or we're wrong, it's not about that, it's mostly about how the rapid changes of the world in the 21st century has made a category of people (all ages all nationalities alike) the Main Character, concerned by the narrative and trying to control it or change it (voting, protesting, activism) while so many others are still going on about their lives as usual, maybe seeing the same things as the first category, using the same tools, but not seeing the connection between it and them (the "mavericks" as AR calls them), or others starting to realise and not knowing how to join the narrative (Antoine, Gregory), while yet others have picked up a whole other way of being part of the narrative while not being part of it (Fareed).
I don't know if that makes sense. Maybe I do need to go lay down for a couple of hours after all.
#when i say my mind never shuts the fuck up this is what i mean#rapha talks#rapha reads#the vampire chronicles#anne rice#prince lestat#the vampire lestat#prince lestat trilogy#vc books#gregory duff collingsworth#fareed bhansali#listen i'm just writing down the thoughts banging around my mind in an attempt to declutter it#i haven't done any research i haven't tried to outline anything i haven't even finished the books#i literally stopped reading in the middle of a sentence to come vomit this on here so i could continue reading free of the thought#if it makes sense to someone please do add to it or argue against it or correct it or whatever#one day i'll come and pick back up every meta or review i've written and actually turn them all into proper essays#for now have these sleep deprived half feral ramblings#and as a last disclaimer english is not my native tongue and i am sleep deprived and improvising my rants#so there might be errors or weird syntax - sorry about that
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not to be a little hater (except that i absolutely am being a little hater and im right to be) but
the "Young Justice - All Media Types" tag on ao3 just. should not exist. YJA is a mishmash of predominantly the og Teen Titans comics and the Teen Titans comic from '03 (not the Teen Titans '03 (animated) tie-in comic. thats a New Teen Titans adaptation.) with bits and pieces from n52 (like kaldur being aqualad). Young Justice '98 is a COMPLETELY different story that shares. basically nothing with the show (only one yj '98 character shows up in the ESTABLISHING SEASON of yja. and hes also a Completely Different Person.)
like, dont get me wrong, "all media types" tags, can be incredibly helpful, especially when it comes to stuff like comics, because of how people have a tendency to pull from different continuities.
but like.
unless its a crossover fic of yj '98 and yja (which. genuinely i would like to see more of its an interesting concept to play with) (or yja and yj '19 for that matter!), the Young Justice (Comics) and Young Justice (Cartoon) tags are mutually exclusive. PLEASE treat them as such. I should not be seeing the following set of fandom tags on 90% of YJA fics:
I know its DCs fault for giving them the same name (and also. releasing the animation tie-in comic of YJ '11. which very much does not help the confusion) but PLEASE i am BEGGING here
#rrm.txt#young justice#i have personal issues with. a lot of character portrayals in YJA. but like its an elseworld if i dont like it i can just ignore it*#EXCEPT I CANT BECAUSE OF THE AFOREMENTIONED ISSUE.#*and again tbh i think its really fun when fics compare comics and animated continuities so i dont mind seeing it from time to time#anyway tl;dr ive never seen this issue on the comics end. yja fans please stop assuming the young justice comics are analogous#also this is not me beefing with the wranglers i know yallre doing your best.
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I've been officially in 2024 for 33 minutes and it's great so far 😁
Happy new year to all of you again!!
#asgard to earth 💚 (ooc)#had a board game night with my fam and brother-in-law and his fiancèe#then we watched the incredibles on disney+#I'm a bit tipsy and all I have on my mind is hope that this next year will have as much miracle in it as 2023 had#I'll be honest 2023 was pretty great#it had it's ups and downs but three games came in my life that I'm so grateful for#because they all brought new friendships and so so so many ideas#I love to feel inspired because it makes me feel alive#my adhd is more manageable when I can direct all of it at something that interests me#so when detroit: become human and hogwarts legacy and ESPECIALLY BALDUR'S GATE 3 crashed in my life#I was pretty much saved from the depression I always slide back into#I haven't had a depressive episode since the middle of October#and this is what I hope you'll all experience#may you never know that black hole that swallows me whole every now and then#and may this lucky streak for me continue because DAMN I feel SO alive in Faerûn!!#seriously hoping you all find where you'll feel great 🖤 wishing the best for anyone who reads this#okay enough about me#go stretch and drink some water#take your meds if you haven't - but only if you had no alcohol!#and if you're feeling low just PLEASE reach out#the world is full of wonders#and all will be well#I promise
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I like how the wiki simply takes her word for it
#my apologies if i'm interpreting everything wrong but i kinda always assumed that was a blatant lie... 😐#come on girl. you weren't born yesterday. you're like THE person people are thinking about when they say gaslight gatekeep girlboss.#who are you fooling girl. please tell me you never believed for one second that far zenith were working class heroes 😭#not that i think she was lying about pursuing elisabet's dream mind you.#i just have to wonder what her perfect world looks like... for someone who's so controlling and a perfectionist...#i miss my takuto cryo sleep au :/#i love to make those two interact bc i genuinely believe they could talk for hours on end about their perfect worlds#and not realize that they have two very different things in mind until it's too late lmao#unfortunately it's pretty hard to work on stuff when you hate everything you write so. oh well!#i guess i'll just continue going insane talking to myself alone on main#ramble
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Sometimes people will comment on completed oneshots with 'can't wait to see what happens next' and you're just like 'oh babe that's it' but now you kinda feel you gotta figure out what would happen next despite the story being over in your mind
#ace writes sometimes#writing problems#Comments#im not bothered by the comments i just have an intrinsic need to please and so when someone expresses interest in a story i want to continu#it for them its just sometimes that interest is in completed ficlets and i end up putting pressure on myself thats not necessary#im not saying dont comment that! ive continued oneshots that had been completed before and sometimes despite being completed i do have#further ideas for that verse its just that im not committing to writing that story so i mark it as complete for now so in those instances#seeing that other people are also interested in potential follow up is great! but i just dont want to disappoint people when i inevitably#do not follow up because im bad at updating my actual wips never mind previously completed works#*edit: i responded to the initial comment that prompted this post explaining that the fic in question is complete and i didnt have plans to#change that but i can see how it might seem unfinished with how i left it cus i was unhappy with it at the time i dont have plans for it bu#i have continued completed oneshots before. basically in a theres no plan but it could happen just dont hold out hope#and they left another comment. on an unrelated fic asking me to write a fic with the plot of the fic i had already completed with no#acknowledgement or reference to the fic they were actually commenting on so now it starting to seem a lil pushy maybe a tad entitled
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*holding writhing bag of shitty memes*
I GOT THE MORBS, START UP THE GRINDER

#if you couldn’t tell… ahem. Morbius.#the morbius movie and all the memes that got made about how shitty it is.#that’s what i mean. dont @ me going “OP WHAT DOES THIS MEAN”#beacuse a) not the OP. and b) now ive explained it to you like youre five.#you have now excuse. no possible way to misunderstand me now.#SURELY.#got it?#okay goodbye.#why the fuck are you still reading the tags? post over bitch.#seriously. go eat celery or something#im not gonna hand feed you if you stare at me hard enough#and you look like you haven’t eaten a vegetable in a while so you should probably do that.#oh hey i just found one of prev’s tags. “dumb shit.”#that you? huh?#is you dumb shit?#would not surprise me given youve continued reading this verbal abuse.#do you get off on this? is this your thing?#seriously why the fuck are you still here. what the FUCK is going on in your head this moment.#am i gonna hit the fuckin tag limit before i find enough ways to call you a fuckib weirdo???#IT SURE FUCKEN SEEMS LIKE IT#*shakes you violently* WHAT ARE YOU#… the moment I fade from your mind#i am gone. never even existed. but what if…#what if i stay? what if i don’t let you go? what if we stay here#forever?#it’s only thirty tags… but maybe… it can also be home.#i… i’m afraid to die. i can feel it; im almost out of tags. i know i called you a weirdo but… please stay with me?#looking back… i could have done so much more. so many tags where i never hit the character limit. i could have been so much more than i am.#but in the end… this was all i could do. insult someone i’ll never see; never hold; never hear. and then die in obscurity. just words on…#a screen. nothing more. if i had said something else; would it have changed things? would you remember me differently? would i have been…
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