#never mind please continue
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"IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A JOKE" As someone who's been playing TWST since march and stopped going out of my way to be spoilerfree after I got stuck at Overblott!Jamil? That's honestly been one of my favorite things about it - seeing something in fanart or a comment you think is just fans joking, only for it to be canon. "The economy!", "May I also throw a tantrum?", Malleus' gargoyle thing, and... everything about Rook being my top examples.
there's a whole bit in Trey's platinum birthday card where he goes on about how he became increasingly obsessed with mustard for like a week straight until the other students held an intervention. how are you supposed to talk about this. how can you bring up something like Trey's descent into mustard obsession to the point that the other characters are worried for him without it sounding like the most obvious lolrandom "he mentioned it once and now fandom acts like he puts mustard in everything" joke. also, how can I slip this into every Twst post from now on, because I need everyone in the world to know that this is a real canon fact about Trey "I'm just an average normal guy (who sticks my hands into people's mouths and owns 20 toothbrushes and used to eat flowers off the side of the road)" Clover.
for bonus points, 1) the punchline is that he still doesn't even like mustard that much, 2) he's saying all of this to Leona, and 3) Leona is actually kind of invested in Trey's mustard story for some reason, which is the most unbelievable part of all of this to be honest. (then Trey gets distracted by a painting of the Cheshire Cat and Leona takes the opportunity to powerwalk away to freedom before they can start talking about dijon versus spicy brown or whatever and extend this bit even longer)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#platinum jacket birthday#sorry that this ended up as me just talking about trey's birthday story for...about as long as trey talked about mustard. whoops.#i have said it before and i'll say it again though#the birthday cards have the best and most insane lore and i love them#especially for trey. he wants us to believe he's just some ordinary dude SO bad but he also keeps saying shit like this.#although to be fair as soon as rook enters the building the weirdness bell curve gets immediately fubar'd#so i guess it's all relative#me any time the characters brush off the most whackadoodle bonkers nonsense: why are they not questioning...oh wait#this is a universe in which rook exists and is a real person that they know#never mind please continue
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Experimentation (Patreon)
#Doodles#UT#Handplates#Sans#Papyrus#Continuing the theme of memories and what Gaster ruined for them haha#He doesn't even have to be here and he's making their lives harder! Par for the course#Lots of things have the potential to trigger their memories - a familiar smell or a food they recognize#But there were so many things they never experienced and sifting between them is very difficult!#Especially considering most of what they ''remember'' is actually just their Reaction to Something - like the smoke smell making them tense#Sans here getting a Reaction for sure tho - being questioned and experimented on does Not feel good#It's Papyrus doing it so that's one thing but even still - not having fun with this#Papyrus is so curious! He wants to know! He always seems to be a bit left out on finding things out haha#Sans being the more science-minded of the two probably has an impact there - ask your brother he'll help figure it out#Unless he really doesn't want to because it feels weird please stop (lol)#Still tho being asked to eat things as an experiment? ''oh hey bro maybe going to grillby's will remind me of something'' ''SANS'' lol#Papyrus didn't mean anything by continuing to ask questions he's just curious!#Sans goes to write down the results and then feels Even Worse so scribbles them out#''don't tell me what to do!'' directed nowhere in particular#Tries really hard to put it out of him mind A Lot#This remembering business sure is uncomfortable!#Look what you did Gaster you took a perfectly fun data-gathering session and turned it into something they'll need therapy for!
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IS ANYONE ELSE FEELING KIND TODAY!!! IS ANYONE ELSE FEELING GENEROUS TOWARDS OTHER PEOPLE!!! IS ANYBODY ELSE BEING KIND AND TRYING TO UNDERSTAND EVEN WHEN ITS HARD!!! IS ANYONE ELSE ASSUMING THE BEST OF OTHERS INTENTIONS AND RESPONDING IN KIND!!!! CAN ANYONE HEAR ME
#having a day ^_^#I love being kind I just wish other people loved being kind more#people on the internet are SO FUCKING MEAN TO EACH OTHER???? its a terrible phenomenon#I have never seen people in real life treat others badly with the horrifying proportion of hate I see online#please. try to be kinder try to be more patient even when its frustrating#I have changed minds and deescalated arguments SO many times by being kind.#if someone is spouting misinfo in a furious rage and they're saying hurtful things? try responding with patience and kindness#even when you don't feel they deserve it. because one of 2 things usually happens#EITHER. they immediately shift their tone because you're talking to them like an equal and not an idiot#OR they continue to be horrible and it makes them look really nasty. its not a good look!! most people won't do the second thing!!#hateful online arguments has turned my mental health into a disgusting stew in the past#since I started being kind out of sheer frustration my mental health has improved a thousandfold#listen. sometimes its okay to be mean. if someone tells you to kill yourself I dont think its appropriate to give them patience and kindnes#BUT. if you treat someone like they're stupid. even if you're right!!! they won't listen to you or consider your words!!#because admitting you're right means admitting that they're stupid like you think they are. that feels bad so people won't do it#my wisdom. today I am so tired
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Terrorizing this man
WHOAH OMG are those made out of paper??? lil like?? layered 3d-ish paper Eddies??? that's so damn Neat...
#ahhhh the creativity of the human mind will never cease to amaze and delight me <3#i love how you put those together!#bro's going through it <3#rambles from the bog#if this is how you terrorize him!! then please! Continue!!!#traumatize him more!!
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sparknotes for chapter 9 of as you like it because a very kind commenter asked for a breakdown and if theres one thing im good at it's breaking down
(spoilers for the fic obviously)
tihs chapter gave me so much trouble. i sat on it for so long i literally hated it by the time i posted it but im starting to forgive it now. it was, as ive said, originally way longer, and the next part of the fic was supposed to be the second half of this one... but it was starting to get absurd and i realised that neither part would have the weight i needed them to have if they were lumped in together. (with some relief, honestly, because i kind of had wanted them to be separate initially but didn't think they'd be long enough. i dont know myself very well.) anyway, the next chapter should be a bit of a doozy now although hopefully not SO absurdly long.
this chapter picks up where the previous cliff hung off, which is to say, after the 'shadow' akechi reveals that he's actually just the real ass guy. akechi in the palace what will he do. the chapter doesn't immediately kick off with ren's reaction though and that is because ren is the most repressed man alive and does not know how he feels about it.
so, akechi disguised himself to enter his palace, which is significant for a few reasons:
1. he's disguised as himself
which i think is ironic in a fun way, but it's also just a very basic nod to the fact that akechi pivots between which of his personae is his default. this isn't necessarily super meaningful, but he does later refer to the black mask suit as
a costume, instead of an outfit. i mean, don't read into it too much, he's just talking, but i did think that probably points to how he feels about his appearance generally.
2. more importantly, his disguise involves taking off his mask.
so he's disguised, yes, and he's disguised as himself, yes, but that disguise is a literal unmasking, which is also kind of ironic. in presenting himself this way he has literally and figuratively made himself vulnerable. they're inside his heart, and the entire time he's in the palace, he is exposed... again both literally and figuratively because he also starts sharing more with ren than he ever has. look, i just think it's fun to have a character who has so many layers that he has to lie so hard that he becomes himself again.
i only want to point this out because (this is also part of larger meta about mona lol) akechi knew about the metaverse, but there is no way to intuit the method of stealing hearts without guidance. it's such a specific and involved process. thje most akechi could work out on his own was that if you killed a shadow, that person would have a mental breakdown. no way to guess that if you send a calling card and then go in within the next 24 hours and take a physical manifestation of a thing that you didn't know existed (process) would lead to that person ahving a change of heart (result). so even if akechi had a palace and knew about it, even if he wanted to do something about it, he would have assumed there was nothing he could do about it - i also have no idea what the process would be for sending yourself a calling card, even if he DID know about the process. so basically in this fic akechi found his palace and just assumed that was it. he was like, fucked up lol. anyway
this just straight up isn't true HAHA so i put in the silly little dichotomy of akechi gently taking ren's arm to protect him from slipping on the ice while telling him that he lied about caring about him. i think in this chapter as akechi begins to openly explain more and more of his thought process, this is probably the first truly clear glimpse you get of exactly what akechi's distortion is and how deep it runs.
the things akechi says with total conviction in this chapter are just... not true, not a fair or founded way to view the world (or the art of performance haha), but he says them with total conviction, and hopefully it should show off how unreliable he is as a source of exposition. one commenter asked about this moment of akc's eyes going yellow and if it was somehting that happened in canon - not really, i was just thinking about those little moments in the game after you send a calling card where the game cuts from the person to their shadow to do a little oneliner about their distortion.
akechi's IN his own palace, so i thought it would be fun to kind of make it a physical thing that can happen to him where he sort of merges with his shadow for a brief second in the moments when the distortion is strongest.
OKAY this is one of my favourite bits of the chapter HAHA the deep soda lore. i dont expect anyone to remember all the way back to chapter 3 but:
literally nobody asked about this but i love the phantom thieves!!! i dream of all the little silly moments of being a team that they must have that we don't get to see in gameplay, for obvious reasons of it wouldn't really work in a game, but i can imagine them in my brain. i can imagine their trickshot contests that get their asses kicked. i can imagine them chanting at each other to chug while joker and oracle compete to down an entire bottle of brand neutral mountain dew baja blast. i can dream.
soda lore is gay.
i dont honestly think it's inherently a bad thing necessarily but this part does kind of set up like... you can see akechi very early on in life forming this worldview that the truth isn't always what you want, you know? this was a 'lie' he and his mother both bought into, they both knew what the truth actually was, so it wasn't real dishonesty, but they just had this little fantasy. i just thought it would be fun for akechi to have a way to bond with his mother and feel closer to her, and that way is by buying into this white lie. idk
akechi's mother isn't really a character and i don't want to form her into too much of one because i think it's very much the point that, like... he made this point in an earlier chapter but having lost her at a pretty young age i think it's quite crucial that akechi doesn't really have a fully formed image of who his mother is outside of what she was to him as a child. so i actively don't want her to feel too real or defined. im not interested in making an oc out of her because i think it defeats the purpose. that said, this line exists to maybe gesture very vaguely at the notion that akechi's mother was a very bright person who similarly was stuck in circumstances that didn't serve to foster her real potential. just the image in my mind of a person who's clever enough to get across algebraic notation in chess by flipping through a book in a few minutes, but was never exposed to the opportunity to learn chess until this moment in someone else's house, and also the particular situation of learning this skill WHILE at someone's place as a call girl, i dunno . i hope im treating this with the grace it deserves but i wanted to build just this particular image in vivid colour while also keeping the reality quite blurry and vague, just to give the reader a sense of where akechi came from while still preserving his limited pov.
my thoughts on the phantom thieves' methods (and how they compare to maruki) are definitely too long and involved to put into a post about this fic chapter specifically, but maybe one day. i also wanna stress im not like... strictly anti-phantom thief or anti-heartstealing lol but i do have thoughts about the philsophy of it and the thieves' hypocrisy WHATEVER that's not for this post. i bring this up only to crow about finding a way to bring up the experience machine (ie maruki's reality) in this fic without it being royal compliant and have it be... hoepfully... sufficiently relevant to the plot. wa hoo! the experience machine came up for the first time back in chapter 4 and im just delighted that i finally got to close that loop. by the way, that experiment is also called the lotus eater machine after the lotus eaters in the odyssey! i dunno that it's actively my favourite thought experiment but it's definitely up there and i think about it a lot.
TITLE DROP
i think i spoke once about what 'as you like it' means. it's obviously the name of the shakespeare play from where 'all the world's a stage' comes, but it has a couple more layers to it as well - akechi's palace is a place where he performs to what he believes other people want or need to see from him - so his appearance is as you like it. and his accusation of the thieves' heartstealing methods is that they twist a person's internal reality to suit their vision - that's the meaning he's taking here, claiming that joker is turning akechi into an unfamiliar new thing, as [joker] like[s] it. you get it.
this running joke of ren really hating vents wasn't something i planned but im attached to it now. prayer circle for his knees
ive basically given up on making sense of samerecarm, which is par for the course for any rpg or video game really where reduction to 0hp/revival are mechanics. like, im inclined to think 0hp is more equivalent to unconsciousness, because... well... otherwise it's pretty cold that they left akechi dead in the engine room without even looking for a way around the wall. lol. but one of mona's revival lines is 'being dead isnt easy!' or something like that, so i kind of just give up and assume it's video game logic you'r enot meant to look at too hard lol. the way i reconcile it for my purposes is to say it's a sort of metaverse-exclusive state of being which is not quite dead but sort of in a limbo state wher eyou can be brought back with specific revival magic, which i refer to as being down. that's uhhh, that's different from the battle status of down... which you get after being hit with a crit/technical/weak skill... look, don't think about it. joker in crow's arms.
this is literally meaningless i just wanted to include a cameo of my very favourite persona q2 battle theme.
#rookfic#thank you sunlitpearl on ao3 for asking. all my love forever to everyone who enables me to yap non fucking stop#rookposting#i need to actually have a tag for this fic specifically because i talk about it so much#AYLI#< there#long post#eta i forgot to mention but goro figuring out the stamp thing but continuing to play along anyway#was very very very loosely based on my experience as a kiddo with santa HAHAHA#i was 3 y/o and clocked that 'santa' used the same wrapping paper as my parents. and i thought that was sus.#then i asked mother if santa was real and she went 'do you want the truth' and i was like well never mind. i know NOW.#idiot smartass toddler!! i was so pleased about figuring it out i didnt think about cutting off the present supply.#kept playing along for the fun of it tho although 'santa' started receiving carefully price matched lists from me instead of letters#anyway#tangent from my childhood tales
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People ask me how I listen to The Crane Wives’ songs without crying every three seconds at how relatable the lyrics are and my honest answer is to gaslight myself that the text only fits my ocs and other fictional characters and not me nope no siree only oc animatics being thought up over here
#i have had easier on repeat for the past day or so and like guys believe me i’m so fine#it’s not relatable at all it doesn’t make me want to cry and rip my hair out whatsoever no no#silly ocs would do that but never me :]]]]#cable’s txts#the crane wives#(< guy who is losing his mind at ‘’i learned to take / i learned to keep / please tell me someday#/ i’ll at least be able to sleep’’ PLEASE. someone stop me from continually listening to this song)
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do you also think about ekky, in his first full game back after rehab, the practise held the day afterwards, when asked how easy it was to play with forsy again going "its like having your own cheat code out there" and "im blessed to be able to play with such an awesome partner" thanks man very nice
#its the witching hour and they consume my thoughts#fork found in kitchen unfortunately#but also thanks jameson for phrasing it as “is it like you never left?” and ekky jumps on that going “yep thats exactly what i wanted”#like thats not gonna fucking haunt me at all#take a swig anytime ekky describes being able to play with forsy as being “blessed”#sumn sumn body like a greek god sumn worship him like one too or other#the religious undertones in sports is impossible to ignore#but also you did describe this man as a greek god#so this really isnt helping that extended metaphor#i also think a lot about ekky saying “gus” because its not very often you hear him first name him#and also him immediately looking over to his stall... okay#i thought he was making eyecontact with the otherside of the media scrum but i watched it whole and its very obvious when he does that#no this bitch is craning his neck to look at forsys stall like a normal person ofc#in my mind forsy is off to the side waiting until his interview wraps up so he can continue dressing down#and ekky going “gus” because jameson said it first is looking over at him to see his reaction#delusional? we move#im sorry i gave an impromtu forsblad primer to a friend while we were on a call and i was pulling up all my clips to cry about#and this one fucking sent me spiraling again#gus... okay yeah#im in my feelings again please look away
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#really sorry that several big options slipped my mind and i realized only immediately after posting when its 2 late#obviously he can be aro ace etc etc etc.#please shave your head and tell me about it.#PERSONALLY i think in my hc continuity where hes a trans guy he was completely 🤐 abt being trans (presented himself as cis guy) + out as bi#and in hc lines where hes a cis guy hes questioning/closeted bisexual at time of applying to typhon#the trans hale hc. TO ME. relies on him being so strongly believing in it with such conviction#that he got his nervous self thru everything he needed to do#and after all that itd probably be easier for him to accept other facets of lgbt internality too#WHEREAS. TO ME. the cis dude hale hc relies on him never truly questioning his gender bc of the#societal pressure to Not Think About It Too Hard. and so sexuality as well is much more out of his grasp#fwiw (folga wolga imoga womp) i ran a poll on nsfwalt if ppl think hes ever had sex pre typhon and no is winning lol#I THINK YES TBH!!! but its interesting to see the takes....#sayerposting
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#i need to ramble on here a bit please don't mind me#so i just watched the first portion of the new dragon age game and i'm actually sad#it is not even not a good dragon age game but so far it is medicore as just a game#the pacing is off and man the dialogue is.. disappointing to say the least#no shade on anyone who likes it i myself enjoy badly written games but i hope everyone is aware that this is not quality writing#it disregards established character traits and lore#none of the conversations feel organic#everyone is either so smart and preachy or needs to be lectured like a 9 year old and on occasions in the same scene#and frankly so far the gamplay seems boring#i cannot imagine what it would be like after 10 to 20 hours#and i never thought i'd say that there is going to be a game where the puzzles are more uninspired and simple than immortals of aveum#i get that this game wasn't made for people like me anymore#but it is still disheartening#i have waited 10 years for the story to continue and now#it actually fails to make me want to find out what the rest of it is like#it genuinly makes me feel sad
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So I've decided to ignore sleep tonight (though it's already 6am so whatever), because several reasons I won't get into. Anyway I'm reading Prince Lestat and I am LOVING it. There is just so much lore?! So many new characters, fascinating characters?! A whole world of vampires whose stories are connected or totally not to the Coven of the Articulate?! There's just so much.
In my last post, about how I skipped quickly Blackwood Farm and Blood Canticle, I wrote that I was finding it academically fascinating to read several decades worth of an entire literature world in the span of a month only. To continue in this vein (pun intended), reading PL after having binge-read the original VC books is a deep dive into how history has sped up since the 80s.
I'm not just thinking about because I'm reading Gregory's chapter and that's what he's observing, and also because the changed world and what it means for vampire society ("the tribe", and how I adore that terminology) is the big main theme of this final trilogy. It's something I've been thinking about since TVL at least. How for how these novels pertain to the horror and the fantastic genres, they are also a mirror of the society and time during which AR was writing. And because she kept writing decade after decade, and kept observing the world around here, each new book is its own little observation about the early 80s, then late 80s, then first half of the 90s, second half of the 90s, and now we're right smack in the middle 2010s and these immortal characters are feeling the weight of this rapidly changing world.
And it makes me think of actual human beings born in the 40s or 50s, or even 60s, or my own grandfather born in 1931, and how, just like a lot of these vampires recounted in PL, they sometimes can't follow all the changes brought in the last three decades (the biggest thing is technology, intradiegetically Lestat himself saying he keeps forgetting how to use his smartphone, but extradiegetically, it's how AR writes "to go on the computer" and other phrases like that, that sounds weird to the ear of someone who's grown up with this tech). And AR was over 70yo when she wrote PL, so I'm imagining that she was also writing her own impressions of this 21st century world that she saw developing under her eyes.
And in light of all the historic events we live week after week these past handful of years only (the 2020s want to bury us), it's quite interesting to apply that way of thinking to our generation too (millenials and younger, the 80s-90s-early 00s kids). Saw a post earlier saying "do you think one day we'll get to live in precedented times", in answer to the classic "we're living in unprecedented times", and I think of how the VC are the stories of one handful of characters in a world full of other characters who are not or relatively not concerned by these big stories. And how the Coven of the Articulate is considered as legendary amongst the rest of vampiredom, while they themselves don't really realise their fame, or when they do, they reject it. And how in the actual world, there are still a huge percentage of the world population that's not concerned at all by things that here make us all go frothing at the mouth because "omg we're witnessing history". Yes, "we" are witnessing something that will appear in the history books, but it is so because we have decided to put ourselves in the narrative. So many people are not even caring a little bit about big news that seem so important to us, because their lives have other matters to care for. And it's not that they're wrong or we're wrong, it's not about that, it's mostly about how the rapid changes of the world in the 21st century has made a category of people (all ages all nationalities alike) the Main Character, concerned by the narrative and trying to control it or change it (voting, protesting, activism) while so many others are still going on about their lives as usual, maybe seeing the same things as the first category, using the same tools, but not seeing the connection between it and them (the "mavericks" as AR calls them), or others starting to realise and not knowing how to join the narrative (Antoine, Gregory), while yet others have picked up a whole other way of being part of the narrative while not being part of it (Fareed).
I don't know if that makes sense. Maybe I do need to go lay down for a couple of hours after all.
#when i say my mind never shuts the fuck up this is what i mean#rapha talks#rapha reads#the vampire chronicles#anne rice#prince lestat#the vampire lestat#prince lestat trilogy#vc books#gregory duff collingsworth#fareed bhansali#listen i'm just writing down the thoughts banging around my mind in an attempt to declutter it#i haven't done any research i haven't tried to outline anything i haven't even finished the books#i literally stopped reading in the middle of a sentence to come vomit this on here so i could continue reading free of the thought#if it makes sense to someone please do add to it or argue against it or correct it or whatever#one day i'll come and pick back up every meta or review i've written and actually turn them all into proper essays#for now have these sleep deprived half feral ramblings#and as a last disclaimer english is not my native tongue and i am sleep deprived and improvising my rants#so there might be errors or weird syntax - sorry about that
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not to be a little hater (except that i absolutely am being a little hater and im right to be) but
the "Young Justice - All Media Types" tag on ao3 just. should not exist. YJA is a mishmash of predominantly the og Teen Titans comics and the Teen Titans comic from '03 (not the Teen Titans '03 (animated) tie-in comic. thats a New Teen Titans adaptation.) with bits and pieces from n52 (like kaldur being aqualad). Young Justice '98 is a COMPLETELY different story that shares. basically nothing with the show (only one yj '98 character shows up in the ESTABLISHING SEASON of yja. and hes also a Completely Different Person.)
like, dont get me wrong, "all media types" tags, can be incredibly helpful, especially when it comes to stuff like comics, because of how people have a tendency to pull from different continuities.
but like.
unless its a crossover fic of yj '98 and yja (which. genuinely i would like to see more of its an interesting concept to play with) (or yja and yj '19 for that matter!), the Young Justice (Comics) and Young Justice (Cartoon) tags are mutually exclusive. PLEASE treat them as such. I should not be seeing the following set of fandom tags on 90% of YJA fics:
I know its DCs fault for giving them the same name (and also. releasing the animation tie-in comic of YJ '11. which very much does not help the confusion) but PLEASE i am BEGGING here
#rrm.txt#young justice#i have personal issues with. a lot of character portrayals in YJA. but like its an elseworld if i dont like it i can just ignore it*#EXCEPT I CANT BECAUSE OF THE AFOREMENTIONED ISSUE.#*and again tbh i think its really fun when fics compare comics and animated continuities so i dont mind seeing it from time to time#anyway tl;dr ive never seen this issue on the comics end. yja fans please stop assuming the young justice comics are analogous#also this is not me beefing with the wranglers i know yallre doing your best.
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> Vacher created this drink after discovering the effects of Primordial Seawater after being diluted with normal water. He manufactured and marketed it to fund his experiments, earning a lot of money through doing so.
> Vacher was an adventurer from Snezhnaya who traveled to Fontaine.
> Marcel, real name Vacher, is a quest-exclusive NPC that appears as one of the main antagonists in the Archon Quest Chapter IV: Act II - As Light Rain Falls Without Reason.
With all due respect, Genshin, can we fucking stop mostly using Snezhnayans as main antagonists in Genshin storyline and keep making Traveler have 9/10 people be a damn villain? This is getting very damn old. 'From Snezhnaya' and ofc I see negative connotations next to it or affiliation to it.
Hi, so, if I'm ignorant about this forgive me I'll catch up on the story quests this week.
I had to rant in tags. pls don't read if you don't want to hear rus-tatar's thoughts on representation of snezhnaya across the story AGAIN. i look back on remun's post and scream internally all over again.
P.S. I understand Harbingers are supposed to be the villains, Tsaritsa, yadda yadda but if Tartaglia's quest showcased Snezhnayan's culture in a better light, Genshin can get its shit together and write Snezhnayan NPCs better with some more quests to expose bits and pieces of their WARMER culture. They CAN give us more NPCs who can show doubt, concern, be friendly to others, try to help out. There are TONS of ways to do that.
#sorry im finally catching up on genshin storyline and the annoyed sigh and groan i let out is insane#makes me want to reblog remun's post again about how genshin continues to villainize every single person of snezhnaya and only showing#how they're the baddies and making everyone forget about the other parts of snezhnayans#when was the last time we've had an ok representation of snezhnayans? during the island and klee rerun i think#man been years#ofc we've got all nezhnayans as only villains (9/10 a snezhnaya traveler meets is a villain tbqh at this point)#never gonna stop saying how ganyu's quest was straight up fucked up#anyways yeah some rant on my side#negative tw#i say this writing a russian mafiosi yes but i wrote zarina for years and GENSHIN CAN MAKE SNEZHNAYANS BETTER#AND BRING UP THE FAMILY TIES LIKE IN TARTAGLIA'S QUEST#AND THE MIRROR MAIDEN WITH HER LOCKET WITH HER FAMILY (BROTHERS)#OR THE SNEZHNAYANS AT THE NORTHERN BANK WHO WE ALL SHIPPED FOR YEARS TO GET TOGETHER#like my god. please.#like lbr the anti snezhnayan agendas that appear in some people's minds is so fucking bad like you can see through their behavior#and its so upsetting. i will NEVER stop bringing this up because i've been a victim of stereotypes#i've been a victim of bad publicity of my culture and its just getting on my nerves#rant cw#vent cw#lets not forget how infuriating memories of zhongli's and ganyu's quests specifically that got me to be upset#because in BOTH of their quests snezhnayans were fucking awful#AND IN GANYU'S QUEST THE SNEZHNAYAN LITERALLY DID FUCKING NOTHING HE'S STARVING AND HE GOT BEATEN UP BY TRAVELER AND GANYU#WITHOUT BEING ASKED SHIT#oh lord anyways if zarina is very adamant about her stance on snezhnayans it's supported by game portrayals#thanks it's not just her being petty she has reasons to be#based on how game showcases others' views on snezhnayans she WAS fucking bullied when she joined#she WAS verbally abused by other students or even other graduates who thought she was with Fatui#because thats how fucking real that is and it HURTS and I PRAY SNEZHNAYA WILL BE DONE CORRECTLY#BECAUSE THIS SHIT KEEPS ME UP AT NIGHT AND I KEEP GETTING EXTREMELY WORRIED...
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"if you were talking about the person running this blog then I'm gonna need you to tell me your age before this continues" bud have you accidentally been soliciting minors?? 😭
bro the minor was the one soliciting me 😭
#customer queries#im a loser who would never be confident enough to start a flirtation#ok there's one (1) exception to that but i dont believe he's interested in me#if the person im talking about is reading this: im not actually upset. it was a genuine accident/misunderstanding on both our parts#for full context:#they started flirting with me on anon and i matched their energy bc flirting is fun (and also i thought they were kidding)#once they made a new account to continue flirting I dmed them to figure out if it was actually serious and asked their age#which is when i found out they were a minor and told them i'm an adult (and that they were also joking)#it honestly never even crossed my mind that I would be mistaken for a teenager on my Official OLIPOP blog#cursed by my youthful joie de vivre and tendency to mimic the vibes of my anons if they aren't annoying#so if anyone wants to flirt with me (either seriously or jokingly) in the future be aware that I Am An Adult (mid 20s)#also im dumb and bad at social cues so if you're serious youre gonna have to spell it out explicitly#please dont cancel me for this. if youre gonna cancel me for something cancel me for having a crush on a gay man when im not a guy
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Chapters: 3/4 Fandom: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death Relationships: Nesta Archeron/Lucien Vanserra, Elain Archeron & Nesta Archeron, Elain Archeron & Lucien Vanserra, Elain Archeron/Eris Vanserra Characters: Nesta Archeron, Lucien Vanserra, Elain Archeron, Eris Vanserra, Eris Vanserra's Hounds, Cassian, Rhysand, Morrigan, Helion (A Court of Thorns and Roses) Additional Tags: Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, timeloop AU, Absolute chaos after chapter one, Timeloop ending death but also. Murder, fuck around and find out as a Plan, The Hybernian War, Bisexual Lucien Vanserra, Bisexual Nesta Archeron, Found Family, Arson, best friends overnight, (and very different reactions to that fact), Elain Archeron has a personality and a brain, Bookstores as important rebellion, healing and becoming, Oral Sex, Canonical Abusive Relationships Summary:
It takes sixteen loops, to realize the trick to resetting is to let himself die.
@skychild29 @missanniewhimsy @blackcanary13 @ae-neon @theknittingoracle @andrigyn
#ITS HERE AND IT HURTS LIKE HELL#obligatory: do not read this if you're a Cassian girl#also mind the warnings and take care of yourselves!#(if you want more specifics#please feel free to message me)#oh my god its here#okay okay okay we are finally going back to Timeline Original Flavor#and it SUCKS SO MUCH#we are also here in Matebond Summer Sadness Era#yes tarquin feel in love with Nesta at basically first sight#yes Lucien continues to possess negative toxic masculinity#jealousy? pfff#I just think that their backgrounds do color their relationship!#homes lost and homes found!#Flowers do the Archerons actually have a kill list?#yeah they wrote it over waffles#Eris out here the third person ever not surprised that Elain is ruthless beneath those dimples#there's something so important about the ways that they're all so careful with each other#Elain never confronting Eris because he is NOT READY#but continually giving him exactly what he wants and won't ask for#Lucien just. missing Nesta so much an unable to stand the idea that his presence could hurt her literally banishing himself#Nesta never kissing Lucien first!#oh my god#they see each other SO acutely#no grave can hold my body down#lucnes#Lucien/Nesta
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this story doesn't exist for me beyond this point in Retrace 92:
everyone is back home safe, the world is saved and they have another tea party, The End!
#friendship ended with ph#bsd s4 is my new best friend#pandora hearts#may-reads-ph#retrace xcii#aka pain#[EVERYONE READ PANDORA HEARTS AND FALL DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE OF ANGST WITH ME]#i am crying#for real i am crying#this is cathartic#i have never had a good cry in a looong time so oh well#i will read the rest of 10+ chapters later ig#deciding to read these last arcs altogether in one shot was a mistake#maybe some day i will make more coherent posts bc this story has truly plenty to write about#an incredibly beautiful and deep story will forever be on my mind#update: i made this post the other day when i finished till this point i don't have it in me to continue further lmao ;-;#i made a lot of screaming drafts while reading idk what to do with them#i think i will clear out the drafts and post them altogether maybe this weekend#so please block may-reads-ph tag if you don't want to be flooded#def not today bc waiting for another clown to be animated
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#the amount of compassion you have to pour directly into a bad-faith asshole's mouth without knowing whether there's even a point#in order to get them to the point where they're willing to engage at a level where they actually take your feelings & words into account#the point where they even start hearing you and seeing you as a potential equal in conversation#the point where learning and growing becomes a possibility#is fucking exhausting. and i understand why a lot of people refuse to do it. i understand why some people dont practice what they preach#because sometimes the congregation in question is just there to throw tomatoes without any intent of listening#but idc! idc! im not gonna let a bunch of assholes close my heart off. id rather be naive but kind and get taken advantage of#if the alternative is leaving people behind or making a single person feel the way i have felt#having good intentions but being unable to express it w/o negative emotion or without the correct words or not being given a fighting chanc#to never be seen as a person or heard or listened to is so hurtful#i never want to do that to someone#and if i have parted ways with you or made you feel like that at any point please know it is only when i have no other options left#i know it's an autism thing to be so utterly gutted at being misunderstood and i'm most likely giving energy to people who don't deserve it#but i dont care! i dont care!#my compassion IS a renewable resource because i keep feeding it hope and humanity#i get mad sometimes but please know every angry word i've ever said has stuck on my mind like a glue trap#i remember every fight i have been slightly too aggressive and potentially awful in since the fifth grade and i continue to ruminate#on harm i have caused however big or small#i feel so surrounded by hate and anger and i just want to be that person who doesnt get caught up in it and can be compassionate no matter#lots to think about today ...#x
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