#need to work my lawyer AU damn it.....

[ladysophiebeckett]

'he said\she said no pickles' ass pose

[idyllic-ghost]

Title: Unveiling Hearts: The Law of Attraction Pairing: lawyer!Joshua x fem!lawyer!reader Genre: rivals to lovers, coworkers to lovers, lawyer au, romance, smut, fluff, angst Wordcount: 13.4k Rating: 18+

Synopsis: Two former law school rivals are forced to confront their past and present when they end up working together at the same firm. As old tensions resurface, their professional and personal lives become entangled, leading to unexpected challenges. Through rivalry and collaboration, they navigate the complexities of their relationship and careers, discovering that some connections are meant to be re-examined.

Warnings: reader is afab, smut (MDNI), slight dom/sub dynamics, switch!reader, switch!joshua, drunk sex, sex without protection (reader is on birth control), self-doubt, fighting (verbally)

A/N: this is a collab made by @haologram - find the Don't Hate, Litigate! masterlist here!

Disclaimer: The scenarios and depictions in my works are fictional and do not represent real-life situations. They do not aim to reflect the complexities of any culture, city, or individual. All characters are entirely fictional, regardless of names or descriptions.

MDNI: Adults only. Minors are not allowed. Any minors found will be blocked.

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As soon as your eyes flutter open, an unsettling sensation grips you. Despite the blinds being tightly drawn, an unusual brightness floods the room, casting an eerie glow on the walls. The familiar muffled sound of your neighbor’s TV, a constant background noise every morning, is conspicuously absent. This odd silence is jarring. Your heart races as you turn to glance at the clock, its digital display blinking erratically, showing a time far later than your usual wake-up. Panic sets in as you realize your alarm never went off, and you've overslept by a crucial half-hour.

With a string of curses, you stumble out of bed, your feet tangling in the sheets as you lurch toward the closet. Frantically, you grab the first outfit in sight. The button-down shirt you pull on is slightly wrinkled, and you tuck it into your pencil skirt with hurried, sloppy movements. You mutter under your breath, knowing that this disheveled look is a problem for the future you to handle.

Struggling with your pantyhose, you nearly topple over, muttering a string of curses. "Damn you, alarm clock, this is all your fault," you grumble, your voice tinged with frustration. Finally dressed, you sprint into the kitchen, where the unfamiliarity of your new space looms large. "Where are the cups?" you groan, flinging open cabinets and drawers in a frantic search. Each empty cabinet and misplaced item heightens your frustration, making your heart race even faster. After what feels like an eternity, you stumble upon a bowl and, with a resigned sigh, decide it will have to do for your much-needed coffee.

Tofu, your white, fluffy cat, watches you with an air of amused indifference. His emerald eyes follow your every move as you haphazardly brew coffee in the bowl. "Really, Tofu? Just going to sit there and judge me?" you mutter, glancing at him. He meanders over to his food bowl's usual spot, looking at you expectantly. "Great, even the cat knows this place better than I do," you sigh, shaking your head. You scoop out his food and place the bowl on the tray, giving him a quick pet. "Bye, Tofu. Be good," you say, but he merely flicks his tail and turns his back, more interested in his breakfast than your farewell.

Turning to the hallway mirror, you take a moment to compose yourself. You meticulously smooth down each unruly wisp of hair and straighten your blazer with unwavering attention to detail. The reflection staring back at you looks polished and composed, a stark contrast to the chaos of your morning. Satisfied, you grab your bag and dart out the door, mentally steeling yourself for the whirlwind of tasks and challenges that await.

As you arrive at the law firm, you navigate the bustling corridors, your mind already racing with the tasks you need to catch up on. The familiar hum of office chatter and the clatter of keyboards provide a strange sense of comfort amidst the morning's turmoil. You barely settle into your chair, your to-do list unfurling in your mind, when your boss's voice rings out, "We need you in the conference room for an urgent meeting."

You grab your coffee mug, now filled with the hastily brewed beverage, and head to the meeting. "So much for a moment to relax," you think, your shoulders tensing with the anticipation of another demanding day. As your colleagues file into the room, you steel yourself for the challenges ahead. Despite the morning's chaos, you know you have to keep pushing forward.

When you enter the room, you notice a familiar figure standing by the window, reviewing a stack of documents. A tall, handsome man with a dark navy suit and his hair swept back in a haphazard way – the kind of hairstyle that looks effortless, but everyone secretly knows is high maintenance. Your heart skips a beat as you recognize him— Joshua Hong, from law school. The years have been kind to him; he still has the same confident stance and sharp eyes.

You sit down in your usual seat, praying that your old-school rival doesn’t recognize you. Today out of all days – when you look disheveled and tired as all hell – he just had to appear. If you remember correctly, he works for a rival company and you spend several minutes wracking your brain for an answer as to why he is there. Your boss begins discussing the new, urgent case you are assigned to, but your attention is divided between the details of the case and the presence of Joshua. You feel a mix of surprise and irritation at seeing him again, memories of your intense rivalry flooding back.

Once the meeting ends, you’re hurriedly packing your things together to avoid Joshua – you know you wouldn’t be able to avoid him completely, but maybe you could buy yourself enough time to go to the bathroom and put yourself together. However, your plans are disrupted by your supervisor who comes walking over to you.

“Y/L/N, you were unusually quiet today,” he says with a furrowed brow. “Is anything the matter?”

Your supervisor is kind, and you feel truly fortunate to have him. However, his timing leaves much to be desired. As he calls your name, you notice Joshua's head snap in your direction, his eyes narrowing with interest. Maybe he had already seen you, but now he seizes the opportunity to approach. His confident stride carries him across the room, a faint smirk playing on his lips. He joins the two of you, thanking your supervisor for a good first meeting before turning his full attention to you.

“Y/N,” he says, his tone laced with a hint of amusement, his eyes gleaming. “It’s been a while.”

You force a smile, striving to keep your tone neutral. “Joshua. I didn’t expect to see you here,” you reply, noting how his presence seems to fill the room with an almost overbearing energy.

“I just transferred from my old company,” he replies, his voice carrying a familiar, competitive edge. His gaze locks onto yours, unyielding. “Looks like we’ll be working together.”

“Looks like it,” you respond, your heart pounding as you struggle to remain composed. “Welcome to the company, Joshua.” Your words feel stiff, formal, a shield against the flood of emotions his presence invokes.

As you leave the meeting, the cold, distant persona from your university days begins to surface. Memories of who you used to be, shaped by Joshua’s antics, flood back, making you cringe. You recall yourself as the harsh critic, the goody-two-shoes who somehow managed to be a vicious competitor, always driven to outperform everyone else. That fierce competitiveness got you through school, but now, in hindsight, you can’t believe how ruthless you were. The entire situation feels surreal, like a never-ending nightmare.

When you finally reach your office, you glance out the window, only to see Joshua talking to your supervisor again. The sight of him triggers a flood of unwanted memories. He notices you staring and waves playfully, a smug grin on his face. Quickly, you avert your gaze, wishing you could crawl back into bed and escape the reality of work.

The atmosphere in the office feels stifling as you try to focus on your tasks. The bustling environment, usually a source of motivation, now feels oppressive. The fluorescent lights cast a harsh glare, and the incessant hum of conversations around you becomes a dull roar in your ears. Your mind keeps drifting back to Joshua, and the uneasy feeling in your stomach grows.

As the day drags on, you find it increasingly difficult to concentrate. Every little sound seems amplified—the rustle of papers, the click of keyboards, the distant ring of phones. Your thoughts are a jumbled mess, and you can't shake the anxiety gnawing at you. When lunchtime finally arrives, you retreat to a quiet corner of the break room, seeking a moment of solace.

Sitting with your back against the wall, you close your eyes and take a deep breath, trying to center yourself. The familiar scent of coffee and the murmur of your colleagues’ conversations provide a small measure of comfort. You remind yourself that you’ve faced challenges before and emerged stronger. This time will be no different.

When you return to your desk, you catch sight of Joshua once more. He stands at the center of a group of coworkers, his animated gestures and infectious laughter commanding their attention. The sunlight streaming through the office windows catches the gleam of his watch and the crisp lines of his tailored suit, accentuating his charismatic presence. His eyes twinkle with that familiar confidence, and every so often, he glances around the room, as if he owns it.

You take a deep breath, feeling a knot of tension in your stomach. Steeling yourself, you remind yourself that his reappearance will not unsettle you. Squaring your shoulders, you walk with purpose to your desk, the clicking of your heels on the polished floor echoing your determination.

Settling into your chair, you take a moment to ground yourself. The familiar hum of the office envelops you, a steady rhythm that helps you regain your focus. You arrange your papers neatly, your fingers tracing the edges of each document, seeking comfort in the orderliness. The scent of fresh coffee from your mug mingles with the faint aroma of office supplies, creating an oddly soothing atmosphere.

With renewed resolve, you dive into your work, your fingers dancing over the keyboard with practiced efficiency. The tasks before you, once daunting, now seem manageable. You immerse yourself in the flow of productivity, your mind honing in on each detail, each challenge. The turbulent morning fades into the background, replaced by the clarity of purpose.

Just as you settle back into your workflow, you stand to retrieve a document from the printer. As you round the corner, you collide directly with Joshua, who is holding a stack of papers. His documents scatter across the floor, and for a brief moment, you lock eyes.

"Watch where you’re going," you say, trying to keep your voice steady.

Joshua bends down to gather his papers, a playful smirk tugging at his lips. "Looks like some things never change," he retorts. "Still as clumsy as ever, I see."

You kneel to help him, your fingers brushing against his as you both reach for the same document. A jolt of annoyance surges through you, mingled with an unwelcome spark of attraction. "And you're still as irritating as ever," you reply, your tone sharp.

He chuckles, the sound low and infuriatingly charming. "It's good to see you haven't lost your edge."

"Good to see you haven't lost your overconfidence," you snap back, handing him the last of his papers. "Just stay out of my way."

"Can't make any promises," he says, his eyes twinkling with that competitive spark. "But I'll try to be more careful around you."

You stand up, brushing off your skirt, and take a step back. Joshua stands up with you, looking at you expectantly. Some of his, otherwise perfectly slicked back, hair had fallen out of place over his forehead. "You do that," you say, turning on your heel and walking away.

The encounter leaves you simmering, but also oddly invigorated. The rivalry that once pushed you to your limits in university now fuels your determination, and the undercurrent of attraction only adds to the tension.

Returning to your desk, you feel a renewed sense of focus. Despite the lingering presence of Joshua in the back of your mind, you remind yourself that you’re capable and resilient. Each completed task, each problem solved, reinforces your confidence. You glance up occasionally, noting the bustle of the office around you, a testament to the day marching on.

Later that evening, you meet up with your friend Nari at your favorite bar. The warm ambiance and the hum of conversations provide a comforting backdrop as you both settle into a booth with your drinks. It’s just what you need after your chaotic day at work, and you let yourself fully relax – something that your friend seems to be unable to do. Nari sips her cocktail and sighs deeply, clearly exasperated.

“Another bad date?” you ask, already knowing the answer.

“Yeah,” Nari groans. “I don’t know why I even bother with these dating apps anymore. They never seem to work out.”

You nod sympathetically. Nari’s dating woes are a frequent topic of conversation, almost to the point where you have a script of what to say. “Maybe you need to take a break from them.”

“What am I doing wrong, Y/N?” she exclaims with a pout.

“You’re not doing anything wrong,” you correct her. “None of these guys you’re seeing can reach up to your standards, that’s all.”

Nari swirls her drink thoughtfully. “I just can’t get that one guy out of my head. Do you remember the one I met at the bar a few years ago? We had this amazing conversation all night, but I never got his number.”

You scoff playfully, rolling your eyes. “You're such a romantic, Nari. Holding out hope for some guy you met once.”

“You don’t understand! We talked for hours, at some point I thought I'd never go home– and I was fine with it! I think we talked about Billy Elliot for, like, an hour. We both had been crying through it as kids, apparently,” she explains. “It felt like I had met a soulmate... not just because of that, of course, but we were so alike in everything we talked about! I’ve never met anyone like that.”

“This is why I can’t do what you do,” you say. “I can’t do romance, I’d just end up disappointed.”

Nari laughs and leans in closer, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “Speaking of romance, what about you and Joshua? Seems like you two have a lot of unresolved tension.”

You nearly choke on your drink. “Joshua? No way. He’s just... ugh, he’s always been a pain. And now I’ll have to deal with him again. I thought I was done with him after uni.”

“Uh-huh,” Nari teases, raising an eyebrow. “A handsome, successful pain who you just can’t stop thinking about.”

You shake your head in an attempt to drown out her claims, but you can’t deny that Joshua has been occupying your thoughts since you saw him earlier. Despite feeling annoyed by his presence, you find yourself strangely intrigued by the possibilities. It’s strange how someone you despised could still ignite a sense of motivation within you.

“Do you know why he transferred?” Nari asks, bringing you out of your thoughts.

“Not at all,” you admit. “I thought he was pretty much in love with his old company– that’s what it sounded like in school, at least.”

“I have a memory of you complaining about that, yeah.” She nods and sips on her drink before she gets an idea that almost makes her jump out of her seat. “If you’re going to start complaining about Joshua now, I think I’m allowed to talk about my almost-soulmate! We should take turns!”

“Why are you so excited about that?” You laugh at her eccentric behavior.

“Because now I finally have something to hold over your head!” she exclaims and the two of you laugh together.

After finishing your drinks, you and Nari leave the bar, bickering lightheartedly about your love lives before you head your separate ways. Walking home, the cool night air does little to clear your head. Your thoughts drift back to Joshua and the memories of your law school days. You remember the heated debates, the competitive spirit, and most vividly, the times you compared test scores after the particularly grueling exams. Everything you did, in the end, you did to beat Joshua. It’s part of the reason you ended up at the top of your class, you’re sure of it.

As you unlock your door and step into your apartment, your cat greets you with a soft meow. You sigh, kicking off your shoes and recounting the day’s events to your furry friend. “Can you believe it, Tofu? Joshua Hong, of all people.”

Your cat blinks at you, unimpressed by your human drama. Shaking your head, you head to the bathroom to get ready for bed. After feeding Tofu, you walk into your bathroom to do your skincare. As you brush your teeth, you catch your reflection in the mirror, thinking about Joshua’s smirk and the way he still knows how to get under your skin. You shiver at the thought, quickly spitting out the toothpaste in your sink before going into your bedroom.

Finally, you crawl into bed, setting your alarm with extra care this time. 

“Not going to be late again,” you mutter to yourself, determined to face whatever challenges tomorrow brings, including Joshua. As you drift off to sleep, your dreams are filled with memories of past rivalries and the confusing mix of emotions that come with seeing Joshua again.

The next day, you walk into the office determined to focus on your work and ignore Joshua. However, that plan quickly falls apart. As soon as you start reviewing the case files, Joshua walks up behind you in the meeting room. He looks over your shoulder, at the notes you have on your computer, and points out a section you had just written.

“Are you sure you want to approach the case like this?” he asks, pointing to your notes. “I think your argument here is a bit weak.”

You glare at him, refusing to back down. “I’m confident in my approach, Joshua. Maybe you should focus on your work instead of nitpicking mine.”

He smirks, raising an eyebrow. “Just trying to help. Wouldn’t want you to get left behind.”

From that moment, the rivalry that had simmered since law school reignites with full force. Every interaction becomes a contest of who can outdo the other, with you both constantly trying to prove your superiority. Meetings turn into battlegrounds of sharp words and pointed comments, neither of you willing to concede any ground.

Weeks pass, and your frustration with Joshua grows. You vent to Nari over lunch, recounting the latest clash with your rival.

“He just gets under my skin,” you fume, stabbing at your salad. “He questions everything I do, and it’s driving me crazy.”

Nari listens patiently, a knowing smile on her face. “You know, all this bickering sounds like something else to me.”

You look at her, puzzled. “What do you mean?”

“I mean,” Nari says, leaning in, “as I said before, it sounds like you two have a lot of unresolved tension. To me, all of your stories sound like he’s flirting with you. Maybe you should just ask him out and get it over with.”

You blink in surprise, caught off guard by the suggestion. “Ask him out? Joshua? Are you kidding?”

“Think about it,” Nari insists. “You guys are already close, and there’s clearly something there. It might be worth exploring.”

You shake your head, but Nari’s words linger in your mind. The idea seems absurd, yet the more you think about it, the more you wonder if there might be some truth to what she’s saying. It’s not like your love life can get any worse—it’s practically non-existent. Being with someone you know, someone who’s as passionate about work as you are might be a good thing. Maybe there is something beneath all the rivalry and tension that’s worth exploring.

Over the next few days, Nari’s words echo in your mind. The more you think about it, the more you realize there might be some truth to her suggestion. Joshua is good-looking and undeniably talented, and your interactions, while contentious, are always charged with a certain energy. You start to wonder if, beneath all that rivalry, there might be something more. And even if there wasn’t, maybe there could be something – you had been on your own for a while, it was time to find someone.

Finally, you decide to take Nari’s advice. You can’t deny that Joshua has been occupying your thoughts more than usual, and maybe it’s time to confront this situation head-on. After all, what’s the worst that could happen?

The case your team has been working on finally comes to a close, and you all decide to celebrate with a night out at a nearby bar. As the drinks flow, your usual restraint begins to wane, and you find yourself getting more and more intoxicated.

Encouraged by the alcohol and a sudden surge of confidence, you decide to go for it. You approach Joshua, your heart pounding in your chest. He’s standing by the wall, watching all of your coworkers play a game of mafia loudly. He managed to lose in the first round, and you followed shortly after—on purpose, to be alone with him.

“Joshua,” you slur slightly, trying to steady yourself. “I need to tell you something.”

He looks at you curiously, tilting his head. “What is it, Y/N?”

Taking a deep breath, you muster all your courage. “I’ve been thinking about it, and I think there’s something between us. Do you... want to go out with me?”

For a moment, there’s silence. Then Joshua sighs, a look of regret and guilt crossing his face. “Y/N, I... I have a girlfriend.”

Your heart sinks, the embarrassment hitting you like a sobering wave. “Oh,” you manage to say, your voice small. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“It’s okay,” he says gently. “I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression.”

You nod, forcing a smile. “No, it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have... I’m just gonna go.”

Even when he’s rejecting you, he’s perfect. Without waiting for a response, you turn and make your way outside, your vision blurring with unshed tears.

You find yourself sitting on the curb, the cool night air doing little to calm the storm of emotions swirling inside you. Through blurred vision, you order a cab on your phone. As you wait for your cab, your phone rings. It’s Nari.

“Hey, guess what!” she exclaims, her excitement palpable even through the phone, and she doesn’t even give you time to answer before she continues, “I found him! The guy from the bar all that time ago. We’re going out for fast food right now! His name is Vernon– can you believe how sweet that is?”

You force yourself to sound happy for her, even though your heart feels like it’s breaking. “That’s amazing, Nari. I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks, Y/N. I gotta go, but we’ll talk soon, okay? I’ll give you all the details later,” she whispers out the last part as if she’s scared to get caught.

“Sure,” you say, barely managing to keep your voice steady. “Have fun.”

As the call ends, you finally allow the tears to fall. The cab arrives, and you climb in, trying to hold back the sobs that threaten to escape. The driver doesn’t say anything as you give your address, and you spend the ride home in silence, the events of the night playing over and over in your mind.

When you finally get home, you collapse onto your bed, the weight of your unrequited feelings pressing down on you. Despite your best efforts, you can’t stop the tears that come, and you cry yourself to sleep, the heartbreak feeling all too real.

The next morning, you drag yourself to work, the events of the previous night still weighing heavily on your mind. The thought of facing Joshua again is too much to bear, so you decide to take action. After some deliberation, you gather your courage and head to your boss’s office.

“Come in,” your boss says as you knock on the door. You step inside, closing the door behind you.

“Good morning,” you greet, trying to keep your voice steady. “I wanted to discuss something important.”

Your boss looks up from his paperwork, giving you his full attention. “Of course, Y/N. What’s on your mind?”

Taking a deep breath, you say, “I’d like to request a transfer to a different department.”

Your boss raises an eyebrow. “A transfer? This is sudden. Is everything alright?”

You hesitate, choosing your words carefully. “I just think a change of scenery would be beneficial for me right now. Personal reasons, mostly.”

He studies you for a moment before nodding. “Well, it’s interesting you bring this up. You were due for a promotion. I was planning to discuss it with you later this week. If you’re looking for a change, we can consider promoting you to a different department.”

Surprise and relief wash over you. “Really? That would be... perfect.”

“Great. Let me work out the details, and I’ll get back to you by the end of the week,” he says, offering a reassuring smile.

“Thank you,” you reply, genuinely grateful.

For the rest of the week, you make a conscious effort to avoid Joshua. You adjust your schedule to minimize any potential interactions, keeping your head down and focusing on your work. Whenever you catch a glimpse of him in the hallway or the break room, you quickly divert your path, hoping to remain unnoticed.

The days crawl by, but finally, your boss calls you into his office again. “Y/L/N, I have some good news. We’ve finalized your promotion. Starting next week, you’ll be moving to the Corporate Law Department as a Senior Associate.”

A wave of relief floods over you. “Thank you so much. I appreciate the opportunity.”

“Congratulations, Y/N. I have no doubt you’ll excel in your new role.”

As you leave his office, you can’t help but feel a mix of emotions. Relief at the promotion and the prospect of a fresh start, but also a lingering sadness at how things turned out with Joshua. You throw yourself into your new role, working hard to establish yourself and make the most of the opportunity.

Months go by, and you successfully manage to avoid Joshua. Your new position keeps you busy, and the physical distance between departments helps. Slowly, you begin to find your footing again, the sting of rejection fading with time.

While the rivalry with Joshua may be behind you, the memory of it lingers, a reminder of the complicated dynamics that can exist between two people. But for now, you focus on moving forward, determined to make the most of your career and whatever comes next.

It’s late spring, and Nari is practically glowing with happiness. She and her new boyfriend, Vernon, have been dating for a few months now, and they’ve just decided to take their first trip together. Over one of your weekly lunches, Nari excitedly tells you about the trip.

“Guess what?” Nari exclaims, her eyes sparkling with excitement.

“What’s up?” you ask, smiling at her enthusiasm – it was always nice to see her being so positive, something that’s happened more and more recently.

“Vernon’s friend invited us to stay at his summer house for a few days! It’s going to be amazing – a beautiful lake, lots of relaxation, and just what we need,” she gushes.

“That sounds fantastic,” you reply, genuinely happy for her.

Nari leans in a bit closer. “There’s more. Vernon’s friend said I could invite someone, and I want you to come with us.”

You’re taken aback. “Me? Are you sure? It’s your first vacation together, Nari. I don’t want to intrude.”

Nari shakes her head vigorously. “No, no, it’s not like that. I’ll be honest, I need you there. This is a big step for me and Vernon, and having you there would be a huge support. Plus, Vernon’s friend is single, and you never know…”

You laugh and shake your head. “I’m not going for a romantic setup, Nari. But if you need me there, I’ll come.”

Nari beams at you, relief evident on her face. “Thank you, Y/N. It means a lot to me.”

A week later, you find yourself nestled comfortably in the backseat of Vernon’s car. The gentle hum of the engine and the rhythmic swaying of the vehicle create a soothing backdrop as Nari and Vernon engage in lively conversation up front. The bustling cityscape slowly fades away, giving way to a more serene and picturesque countryside. Verdant fields extend endlessly on either side of the road, their lush green expanse interspersed with vibrant wildflowers that flutter playfully in the breeze. As the car's tires glide smoothly over the pavement, you watch the world outside morph into a stunning pastoral scene, the tranquil rhythm of the journey calming your senses.

When Vernon’s car finally rolls to a stop in front of the lake house, your breath catches. The estate before you is nothing short of magnificent, standing majestically against the backdrop of the glistening lake. The grand architecture of the lake house blends seamlessly with the surrounding nature, its wide verandas and large, inviting windows exuding an air of comfort and elegance. The entire property seems to beckon you inside, promising a retreat from the outside world.

You take a moment to soak in the breathtaking view, feeling an overwhelming sense of peace. The lake stretches out like a pristine mirror, reflecting the clear blue sky and the lush, green trees that frame its edges. The late afternoon sun casts long, golden shadows across the landscape, imbuing the scene with a warm, inviting glow. It feels like a perfect sanctuary where the demands of daily life simply melt away.

“Wow, this place is amazing,” you breathe out, your eyes wide with admiration as you take in the idyllic surroundings.

Vernon’s face lights up with pride. “Yeah, it’s quite something, isn’t it? My friend’s doing very well for himself.”

Your curiosity gets the better of you, and you turn to Vernon. “What does your friend do for a living?”

Vernon chuckles softly, clearly enjoying the moment. “Josh is a lawyer.”

The name hits you like a sudden jolt, and a sense of dread grips you. “Wait, a lawyer? Josh?”

Before Vernon can respond further, you notice a figure approaching the car. A wave of panic washes over you as you recognize the approaching figure.

Joshua Hong.

Desperation surges through you, and you scramble for an excuse. “Nari, can you drop me off at a bus stop or somewhere nearby? I just remembered I have an urgent appointment back home.”

Vernon, oblivious to your distress, steps out of the car to greet Joshua with a friendly wave. Nari, her concern evident, turns to you with a worried expression. “Y/N, are you okay?”

You manage a strained smile, hoping to alleviate her concern. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just a last-minute thing.”

Nari’s concern deepens as she looks around, considering your request. “I’m sorry, but there aren’t any bus stops around here for a while. Is it really that urgent?”

“It’s about to be…” The urgency in your voice is more than noticeable, but you know you have no choice but to face Joshua. With a heavy heart, you brace yourself and step out of the car, greeting him with a curt nod.

“Joshua,” you say, striving to keep your voice steady despite the turmoil roiling within you.

“Y/N,” he replies, his tone polite but his eyes revealing a hint of surprise at seeing you.

Vernon, sensing the tension, steps in to diffuse the situation. “Joshua, Y/N is Nari's friend I mentioned earlier.”

Joshua nods politely, his gaze lingering on you a moment longer than necessary. “Nice to see you again, Y/N.”

You muster a tight-lipped smile, doing your best to conceal the inner storm. “Likewise.”

Nari glances between you and Joshua, her curiosity piqued. “You two know each other? From where?”

“From work,” you and Joshua say in unison, the shared response hanging in the air.

Nari’s eyes widen slightly as she processes this. “Oh… it’s that Joshua…” she murmurs under her breath, and you feel a headache beginning to brew by the front of your head.

As you follow Nari and Vernon inside, you can’t shake the feeling that this trip might not be as relaxing as you hoped – especially with Joshua Hong in such close proximity.

The group settles into the lake house, and you’re shown to your rooms by Joshua. Nari and Vernon are assigned the more spacious guest room, leaving you with the smaller one just down the hall from Joshua’s room. It’s a beautiful place, but the proximity to Joshua adds another layer of discomfort. He shows it to you while the other two unpack their bags. When you’ve walked into the room and put your bag down, Joshua leans against the door frame.

“I heard you got a promotion,” he begins, breaking the silence.

“Yeah, I did,” you reply tersely, not sure where this conversation is headed.

“Congratulations,” he says, his voice sincere.

“Thanks,” you mutter, feeling uneasy under his gaze.

“Listen, if I had known that it was you, I would’ve asked Nari to invite someone else,” Joshua admits his words causing a pang of disappointment in your chest.

“Well, I’m sorry to disappoint,” you retort.

“That’s not what I—” he starts to explain, but you cut him off.

“I’ll leave as soon as I figure out a way to get home,” you declare, already planning your escape. "They insisted on driving me here, so I don't exactly have a way of escaping."

“Y/N, you should stay,” Joshua insists, his tone softer now. “I’ve never seen you take time off before. You should enjoy yourself.”

You scoff bitterly. “You think I can enjoy myself when you’re around?”

“I’ll stay out of your way as much as I can,” Joshua offers, ignoring your bitterness. “As long as Nari and Vernon haven’t planned group activities.”

You pause, considering his words. The prospect of leaving this beautiful retreat because of Joshua doesn’t sit well with you, but neither does the thought of spending more time in such close quarters with him.

“... fine. Let’s hope they haven’t,” you concede reluctantly, closing the door with a finality that hangs heavily in the air.

As Joshua walks away, you close the door and lean against it, taking a deep breath to steady yourself. This vacation suddenly feels more like a test of endurance than a relaxing getaway.

Despite the close quarters of the lake house, you manage to maintain a respectful distance from Joshua. You navigate the space with a careful precision, orchestrating excuses to linger in the background or to partake in activities where he’s less likely to be present. It's a delicate dance of avoidance—sidestepping eye contact and keeping your conversations short and polite whenever your paths intersect.

One afternoon, Nari proposes a boat ride around the lake. You agree reluctantly, hoping the change of scenery will provide a welcome distraction from the uncomfortable tension that lingers between you and Joshua. As you settle into the boat, the engine’s soft rumble vibrates through the seats, and you take a deep breath, attempting to embrace the moment.

Across from you, Vernon occupies his seat with a quiet, unassuming presence. His warm smile and relaxed demeanor are new to you, as you haven’t had much chance to interact with him until now. He seems genuinely at ease, contrasting sharply with the tension you feel.

“I heard about what happened between you two,” Vernon says, his voice gentle but carrying an undercurrent of curiosity.

You glance over at Joshua, who stands by the steering wheel, showing Nari the intricacies of boat operation. Nari, bundled up in one of Vernon’s oversized sweaters, tugs at the sleeves as she watches Joshua’s every move. She studies the way he operates the boat with knitted brows, nodding along to every other word he says.

Joshua, dressed in his annoyingly perfect white t-shirt and black swimming trunks, looks effortlessly handsome, and it stings to see him so relaxed. His hair is messily slicked back, kept in place by the salty water from his swim earlier- which you definitely didn't witness. Some of the water still clings to his slightly sunburnt skin. A pair of sunglasses sit on the tip of his nose, and you can't really see where he's looking but you hope for everyone's sake that he's looking at the water and not you. With him far enough away to allow for candid conversation, you turn back to Vernon with a sigh.

“Did he tell you everything?” you ask, your voice carrying a trace of exasperation.

“Pretty much,” Vernon responds with a thoughtful hum. “Honestly, I’m on your side. He’s a big flirt.”

“You can say that again.” You take a sip of the cocktail Nari had prepared for the group, the fruity flavor providing a momentary distraction. “I think it’s in his nature…”

Vernon chuckles, lifting his own drink to his lips. There’s something surprisingly comforting about his presence, and you begin to feel a sense of camaraderie with him.

“Thank you for everything you’ve done for Nari, by the way,” you say, your tone sincere. “I haven’t seen her this happy in a long time.”

Vernon shrugs modestly, but his small, genuine smile betrays his pleasure. “I just like making her happy... Actually, there’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you.”

“Go ahead,” you encourage, curiosity piqued.

“I’ve been thinking of asking her to move in with me,” Vernon confesses, his voice laced with both excitement and nervousness. You hum thoughtfully. “Things have been going so well—so I was considering asking her with flowers, lilies.”

“She’ll love that.” You nod approvingly. “She’s quite the romantic—getting her flowers that she's named after will definitely make her swoon.”

You both chuckle at the thought, glancing over at Nari, who waves cheerfully from her spot. The warmth of the moment makes you realize that Vernon’s proposal is heartfelt and genuine. You turn back to him, offering more advice. “Asking her to move in with you is a great idea. I’m sure she’d love it. She’s just a bit shy when it comes to big gestures. It might be better to do it after the trip, when you’re alone. She likes to keep things private.”

“Good to know.” Vernon nods, setting his glass back down with a thoughtful expression.

“I’m not her best friend for nothing,” you say with a hint of pride.

“True,” Vernon agrees with a smile. “... Can I give you some advice too?”

“Shoot,” you reply, looking at him with an intrigued gaze.

“Try again,” he suggests softly, his tone carrying a note of encouragement. “With Joshua, I mean.”

“Doesn’t he have a girlfriend?” you ask, feeling a mix of hope and skepticism.

“Things have changed...” Vernon’s fingers fidget slightly, as if he’s weighing his words carefully. “I won’t speak for him, but just… give it a try.”

“I’ll take your word for it,” you say with a resigned sigh. “Maybe I will.”

As the boat glides smoothly across the lake’s tranquil waters, the gentle lap of waves against the hull offers a brief respite from the storm of emotions swirling within you. The serenity of the lake, combined with Vernon’s unexpected support, provides a welcome escape from the lingering tension at the lake house.

As the vacation nears its end, you find yourself alone with Joshua on the porch one evening – Vernon’s words floating freely in your mind. You’re not sure how you ended up sitting with Joshua, but you were tipsy enough not to care. After the drinks before and during dinner, on top of the beer you’re drinking now, your ability to think of the consequences of your actions has flown out the window. So, sitting next to Joshua on the deckchairs is the least of your worries at the moment.

The sun sets in a blaze of orange and pink hues, casting a warm glow over the lake house porch where the two of you sit. There’s tension in the air, a mix of unresolved rivalry and unspoken attraction that has lingered between you for so long.

Joshua breaks the silence, his voice gentle yet filled with determination. “I heard Vernon’s going to ask Nari to move in with him.”

“He is.” You nod. “It’s sweet.”

“Do you think it’s a good idea?” he questions.

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“It’s only been a few months, they barely know each other… I just think it’s better if they wait.” Joshua takes a sip of his beer.

“I think you’re being pessimistic.” You put down your own bottle of beer. “They’re good for each other. Some people can have all the time in the world and still not work out, why shouldn’t they try it out?”

Joshua pauses, looking over at you with a questioning gaze. You watch the gears turning in his head, and he eventually groans when he comes to a realization. “Vernon told you about my break up, didn’t he?”

“Nothing gets past you, does it?” You sigh. “It’s not like I pried the information out of him, you know?”

“I know, I just… we have a history that makes everything awkward, somehow,” Joshua says. “It just adds to it, I guess– I should’ve told him not to say anything.”

“It’s fine. Why should I care?” You fidget with your nails.

Joshua placed his half-empty bottle of beer down on the wooden table, the condensation leaving a small ring on the surface. As he did so, he shot a quizzical look in your direction, raising one eyebrow in playful curiosity. A rush of excitement bubbled up inside you, but you quickly attributed it to the alcohol. Nevertheless, unable to contain your amusement, a soft giggle escaped your lips as you returned his gaze with a coy grin and raised your eyebrows inquisitively, silently prompting him to explain his unexpected gesture.

“You don’t care?” he asks, “Not at all? Not one bit?”

“Not at all.” You take another sip of your beer. “Not one bit.”

Joshua hums in disapproval, slowly shaking his head – but his smile gave away that he was joking around. The look he gave you, something secret glittering in his eyes, took you back to all those years ago. He looked the same as he did in university. Maybe his smile lines were a bit more pronounced, and maybe you could find gray hairs if you looked closely, but he was pretty much the same. A proper boy next door with an irresistible charm.

“I could’ve sworn that you asked me out a few months ago,” he argued. “To me, that seems like caring– I don’t know about you.”

“Shut up.” You playfully roll your eyes at him and put your beer bottle down next to his. “Let’s forget about it. I should’ve known you weren’t interested, anyway.”

“I don’t want to forget about it,” Joshua confesses. “And who says I’m not interested?”

You cast a furtive glance in Joshua's direction, your eyes widening in surprise, but he responds with a casual shrug. As he sits up, he swings his legs over the deckchair's edge to squarely face you. His tousled hair adds to his disheveled charm, prompting you to sit up a bit and instinctively reach out to straighten it, but you stop yourself just in time. The two of you are seated with your feet pointing toward each other, both of you feeling the weight of anticipation for what might unfold next hanging in the air.

“You’re interested in me?” you ask.

“Why do you think my relationship went to shit?”

You guffaw at his statement as if it was the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever heard. However, Joshua looks back at you with complete seriousness.

“You’re saying you broke up with your ex because of me?” you say.

“I might as well have,” he confesses. “She said I talked too much about you… even went so far as to encourage me to go after you ‘now that I’m single,’ although I don’t think she was being serious with that one.”

Hearing about Joshua’s failing relationship, because of you no less, satisfies the little monster of envy in your chest. You can’t help but laugh at the situation, though you quickly cover your mouth and apologize.

“No, you’re right.” He picks his beer up again and takes a sip. “It is funny.”

“... you talked about me?” you question, and lean forward as if to encourage him to share his secrets. “What did you say?”

“I’m not sure if I should tell,” he mutters and leans forward as well. “Do you really want to know?”

“Desperately,” you say dramatically, making Joshua laugh.

“Most of the time I complained– but apparently my tangents were too flirtatious in nature.”

“That’s just like you.” You nodded. “You flirt with everyone.”

“Of course, you would think that…” he murmurs and glances down at your lips. “The truth is, Y/N… I only flirt with you.”

“That’s not true! I’ve seen you! You chat up every woman I’ve ever seen you work with– not to mention the way you always try to flatter our superiors.”

“Flattery and flirting are different, sweetheart.” He puts down the bottle again and moves a little closer to you. “I thought you, out of all people, would’ve noticed that by now.”

You can only stare at Joshua, your mind completely blank of any retaliation that you would usually come up with. Not even when Joshua reached over to you, and grabbed your hand; not even when he pulled you up to your feet and guided you over to where he was sitting, could you come up with anything to say.

You only stare as he grabs your beer from your hand and puts it on the table, before making you straddle his lap. Everything in your mind is screaming at you to do something – you’re surprised by how easily you give in to him, but you do nothing to stop it.

“Is this okay?” he asks and you can only nod in response. “Not feeling so chatty anymore?”

Who is this man? You don’t recognize the Joshua in front of you – when did he gain the ability to make you weak in the knees? With a gentle touch, Joshua traces the skin of your arms until he reaches your hands – which he puts on his shoulders. His every move is slow, giving you the opportunity to deny him. You don’t. Joshua lets out a chuckle at your wide eyes and slightly parted lips.

“Who even are you?” you manage to whisper.

“Tonight? I’m whoever you want me to be.” 

“You’re drunk.”

“I’m sober enough to know what I want,” he argues. “Do you?”

You swallow and glance down at his lips, at the way the tip of his tongue darts out to wet them ever so slightly — has he always had such perfectly kissable lips? When Joshua’s hands play with the hem of your shirt, you’re brought back to your senses. He raises his eyebrows, silently repeating his question.

“Fuck it,” you mutter under your breath. “Take me to your room.”

Nari and Vernon are already asleep at the other end of the house, deciding to take an early night after the drinking and constant sun exposure tired them out, so Joshua carries you through the house without worry. He’s already kissing you by the time he opens the door to his bedroom – the only room you haven’t seen in the house.

His bed is neatly made, everything put into place, although you hardly notice it as Joshua’s keeping you much too busy. He throws you on the bed, before crawling up to you himself. You find yourself pinned under him, as he drinks in the sight of you looking like the perfect prey.

“Will you let me have my way with you without biting back tonight, sweetheart?” he murmurs before pressing another soft kiss to your lips.

“Depends on if you can shut me up or not,” you tease.

“Oh, you’re just begging to be taught a lesson, aren’t you?”

You shut him up with another kiss, and he smiles against your lips. As your hands find their way under his t-shirt, he pulls away for a second to pull it over his head. Your hands reach out to touch him, admire his toned, sunkissed torso—cursing yourself for saying no when the rest of the group went out to swim earlier today. Joshua’s hands are playing with the hem of your shirt now, and you sit up to take it off. One of his hands cups your still-covered breast, while the other gently caresses your waist.

“Beautiful,” he mutters under his breath before bending down to leave marks along your clavicle.

You turn your head to give him more access, a gasp escaping your lips as his teeth graze against your delicate skin. His hands go behind your back, unclipping the clasp of your bra and pulling the straps down your shoulders.

You cup his cheek, your fingers trembling slightly as you study his flushed face. The intensity in his eyes and the warmth of his skin feel almost surreal, as if this moment is one you’ll never experience again. Your breath comes in shallow, uneven gasps, the air around you charged with an electric tension that makes it almost impossible to think clearly.

“What are you doing to me?” he asks, his voice a mix of confusion and desire. His breath mingles with yours, each exhale heavy with the weight of unspoken emotions.

“Is it me or is it the alcohol?” you ask, your voice barely above a whisper, each word laden with uncertainty.

“I don’t know,” he admits, his eyes locked onto yours, his gaze searching for answers that neither of you seem to have.

Before you have a chance to respond, the space between you closes with a sudden intensity. His lips crash against yours, the contact sending a jolt of electricity through your entire body. The world narrows to just the sensation of his kiss, every other thought and concern momentarily forgotten. The tension that had been building between you erupts in this singular, explosive moment, leaving you breathless and utterly consumed.

Joshua pushes one of his knees between your legs, and you moan into his mouth at the contact. The sound ignited something within him, and he began kissing down your body. When he reached the top of your jeans, he expertly undid the button and zipper and pulled the pants off your body. A wet stain is visible on your gray panties, and Joshua presses his thumb against it. An urge to close your legs hits you then, but he’s holding them apart—as if he’s protecting his right to see you like this with his life.

Soon enough, he’s ripping your panties off and diving into your pussy. His tongue is messy, toying with your clit before moving down to your hole. Joshua moans, his eyes rolling into the back of his head, as he tastes you. His arms wrap tightly around your thighs, holding you in place. Even if you wanted to escape his ministrations, you couldn’t.

“Oh god,” you moan, “Don’t stop!”

You should know better than to command Joshua to do something. As soon as the words leave your lips, his grip releases and he sits up on his knees. Your orgasm is dragged away from you, and you glare up at Joshua. He only grins back like a madman, his lower face covered in your juices.

With a huff, you sit up and go to unbutton his jeans—desperate to have him feel the same withdrawal. He halts your movements by softly placing his hands over yours, gently guiding them to a stop. You look up at him. His eyes are filled with lust as he cups your cheek, bending down to capture your lips in a kiss. You whimper when you taste yourself on him.

“Do you want me?” he murmurs against your lips.

“Please,” you whine.

“Tell me,” he hums. “Tell me that you want me.”

He leans his forehead against yours, staring into your soul. You can’t allow yourself to say it—you can’t give in to him this easily… right? But you do want him, that’s no secret by now. You don’t just want him, you need him.

“I want you, Joshua…”

With an animalistic growl, he pushes his lips against yours again. You help him get his pants off, your teeth clashing against each other as you move. There’s no time to savor feeling him up over his underwear, he just rips them off.

His calloused hands push you back onto the bed before he pushes your thighs apart again. He watches you like a man starved, waiting for any sign that you don’t want to continue. You reach out for him, and once he’s in your embrace you lock your legs around his waist.

“I give in,” you murmur in his ear. “Have your way with me.”

At your compliance, he aligns his cock with your core and pushes inside of you. The two of you groan at the feeling—something that you hadn’t felt in so long, to the point where you had forgotten how much better it felt than playing with your toys. You trail kisses down his jaw, to his throat. Joshua starts moving his hips against yours, and you find yourself in ecstasy. 

“You’re unbelievable,” he moans hoarsely.

You smile against the skin of his neck, only humming in approval. His dick was bigger than you could’ve imagined, filling you up to the point where you felt completely full, and when he slams into you like your pussy is the best he’s ever had, you can’t help but nearly scream for him. You can only hope that your friends are sound asleep.

“I should’ve done this sooner.” Joshua pants as he leans his forehead against yours. “You feel so good…”

For a moment, you swear that you heard him whine for you. As his hips stutter, you take the opportunity to maneuver yourself on top of him. Once you’re sitting on him, you grind your hips against his before you start bouncing. Joshua sits up, taking one of your tits in his mouth—his hands traveling from your waist to your upper back to push you further against him.

“Do you want to cum inside me, baby?” you ask.

Joshua peers up at you through his lashes, his eyes hazy with lust. His mouth detaches from your body, and you smile at the sight of his glossy and swollen lips. He nods, laying back down to fuck up into you. Joshua’s hands are back on your hips, keeping you still to let him do all the work.

“Holy fffuck–”

You reach your hand down to rub your clit, and Joshua moans as you clench around him. The two of you are babbling incoherently; begging the other to cum with you, telling each other that you’re so close, and letting out unintelligible moans.

By the time you’re cumming, you’re shaking and your eyes are rolling back into your head. You fall against Joshua as he starts slowing down his thrusts. His arms embrace you again, holding your sweaty body against his chest.

“Are you alright?” he whispers, his voice tender and concerned as it brushes against your ear.

“I’m good,” you slur out, struggling to piece together your fragmented thoughts.

For a brief moment, everything goes dark. When consciousness returns, you find yourself lying beside Joshua. The covers are now draped over both of you, cocooning you in a warm embrace. Joshua’s fingers trace gentle, soothing circles on your skin, his touch both comforting and intimate. As your eyes flutter open, you meet his gaze. His eyes hold a mixture of relief and affection, and a soft, reassuring smile spreads across his face.

“Hi,” he says, his voice low and gentle, as if he’s afraid to startle you.

“Hi,” you respond, your voice still shaky. “Was I out?”

“Only for a bit,” he murmurs, his fingers continuing their soothing motion. “I got us cleaned up and into bed. You didn’t miss much.” His tone is calming, filled with a quiet confidence that eases the lingering haze from your mind.

You chuckle, moving to lay closer to his chest. "I'm on birth control, by the way... you don't have to worry about any surprises."

Joshua hums in response. Your legs are already sore, but you find comfort in the slight sting. Joshua’s fingers don’t stop drawing circles and the action, along with the rhythm of his breathing, has you almost falling back asleep.

“I missed you after graduation,” he admits with a mutter. “I thought I’d find it peaceful, but I didn’t… I did everything to hide it, but maybe switching companies gave it away.”

“You switched companies for me?” You move to get a better look at him.

“Would it be embarrassing if I said yes?”

“Absolutely.” You grin, and he replies with a smile. 

You stifle a yawn, and Joshua coos at you in a way that you would’ve found annoying—but now, your heart swells a little in your chest. He brushes away a few stray hairs from your face.

“Go to sleep,” he murmurs. “We’ll talk more in the morning.”

“Goodnight.” You nuzzle your face back into his chest.

“Goodnight.

Morning brings a bittersweet awakening. Despite Joshua’s confession, despite the night you shared together, you can’t bring yourself to stay with him. You know that it would only end with broken hearts and an even more awkward atmosphere at work. No, you can’t stay like this — Joshua’s arms around you, his soft snores, and his calm heartbeat, all make it too real.

You feel the weight of last night’s decisions as you quietly slip out of his embrace. He doesn’t wake up, he merely scrunches his nose and lazily pats the space on the bed to find you. When he doesn’t, he settles for a pillow that he embraces just as he had embraced you prior. Tears begin to sting your eyes, you can’t watch this any longer, and you leave without hesitation.

After changing and grabbing your purse from your room, you find Nari sitting in the kitchen on one of the barstools. She’s snickering to herself while she’s watching Vernon make breakfast– you’d never seen her let go of control in the kitchen before, and if it wasn’t for the fact that Joshua could wake up any moment you would’ve stayed and watched. She turns to you with a bright smile once you make yourself known by clearing your throat.

“Good morning!” she chirps, but her smile falters when she sees your wrecked expression. “Are you alright, Y/N?”

“I… I need you to drive me to the bus station.” You didn’t mean for your voice to become so shaky, but you couldn’t help it.

“Did something happen?” Vernon asks, but you can’t look at him.

“I just need to go home– I think I’m getting sick,” you lie.

“Oh, well if you just wait a minute, we can pack up and leave all together. I don’t mind leaving early if you’re feeling sick,” Nari says, compassionate as ever.

“No.” You look up at her, trying to silently communicate something with your eyes — what, you’re not really sure. “I need to leave now.”

Nari pauses, thinking it over before eventually nodding. Every second that passes feels like an hour to you, and your friend seems to be able to notice it. She says goodbye to Vernon, telling him to not burn the house down as she plants a kiss on his cheek. You want to throw up.

“I’ll get my jacket.” She grabs the car keys and walks out of the kitchen ahead of you. “Let’s go.” 

The drive is silent, the air thick with unspoken words and the weight of emotions left unsaid. Nari understands your need for solitude, respecting your fragile state. The journey feels longer than it should, each passing mile echoing the uncertainty of what lies ahead.

At last, you arrive at the bus stop. She tells you that she’ll bring your bags for you when she and Vernon get back to the city. Before you can step out of the car, she puts a hand on your shoulder.

“It’s Joshua, isn’t it?” she asks and you nod. “Alright. I understand if you don’t want to talk about it… but know that I’ll back you up no matter what.”

With a soft murmur of thanks, you bid Nari farewell, watching her drive away into the distance. Alone at the bus stop, you wait for the bus that will take you back to the familiar confines of your life.

The sun rises higher in the sky, casting a warm glow that hints at new beginnings. As you board the bus, you carry with you the echoes of a night spent in each other’s arms. You sit down in one of the many empty seats, looking out the window to watch the trees fly by and the lake in the distance grow smaller and smaller.

Back at work, you find yourself actively avoiding Joshua, more so than before. Every morning, you arrive early at your desk, burying yourself in tasks and emails, hoping to avoid any unnecessary encounters that might stir up the unresolved emotions from your time at the lake house. 

The tension between you and Joshua doesn't go unnoticed by your colleagues. They whisper about the shift in dynamics, speculating on the nature of your interactions and the underlying reasons for your distance. Despite their curiosity, no one dares to address the elephant in the room, leaving the unspoken tension to hang heavy in the air.

For you, avoidance isn't just about uncertainty in your feelings for Joshua; it's also about safeguarding your professional reputation and maintaining a sense of control over your emotions. Sleeping around with someone at the office – let alone, someone who’s under you in rank – is enough to stir up headache-inducing drama.

As the weeks pass, you remain resolute in your avoidance, navigating the delicate balance between personal desires and professional boundaries. The workplace becomes a battleground of unspoken words and missed opportunities, with both you and Joshua wondering if there's a way to reconcile the growing attraction with the realities of your professional lives.

Amidst the uncertainty, you and Joshua find yourselves at a crossroads, unsure of whether to pursue what could be or maintain the status quo. The aftermath of your intimate encounter at the lake house lingers.

When you hear the news of Nari moving in with Vernon, you’re ecstatic – and when you see his apartment, you’re in awe. The luxurious condo has two stories and although the loft area is smaller, it’s still impressive. You hadn’t ever thought to ask Vernon what he does for a living, but clearly, it pays well.

As Nari excitedly shows you around the apartment, your heart swells for her. This is all that she had wanted; she had a stable job and a stable relationship, and now one of the most impressive apartments you had ever seen. Once you have seen every crevice of the home, she invites you to a housewarming party that she’s hosting later tonight.

“Isn’t a housewarming party for people who move into a new place?” you ask with a smile.

“Well, yeah– but I’m moving into a new place, so it still counts!”

You laugh with her, congratulating her once again on her new place and promising her that you’ll definitely be there tonight. As you leave through the dining room, you spot a bouquet of lilies sitting pretty in a vase. The memories of yours and Vernon’s conversation bring back memories of the lake house; memories of Joshua. You paint on a smile as you say goodbye, promising to swing by later to help with preparations.

Nari’s excitement is contagious as she organizes a lively housewarming party. The space is adorned with cheerful decorations: vibrant streamers hanging from the ceiling, colorful balloons clustered in the corners, and a beautifully set table brimming with snacks and drinks. Friends gather, their chatter and laughter filling the room, ready to toast to the new chapter in Nari's life.

You arrive, trying to mask the unease lingering beneath the surface. You know that Joshua might be here – or might stop by for a moment, but that’s enough for you to go into full-on fight or flight mode. As you walk in, Nari greets you with a warm hug.

“I'm so glad you could make it!” Nari beams, her eyes sparkling with happiness.

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” you reply, forcing a smile. Inside, though, your heart feels heavy.

As the party progresses, the merriment around you contrasts sharply with the turmoil within. You watch Nari and Vernon laughing together, their connection undeniable. Every affectionate glance they share feels like a knife twisting in your chest. Are you really about to lose your best friend to a friend of Joshua’s? Does he have to take everything from you? The unresolved tension with Joshua weighs heavily on your mind, clouding your judgment along with the many drinks you sneak from the kitchen.

You hate yourself for feeling this way, opting to stay in a corner of the living room to take a moment to breathe. However, the good friend that she is, Nari comes to check up on you.

“Are you alright? You’re not bored, right?” she asks.

“No, I’m fine.”

Your eyes are drawn to a sudden rising volume from the hallway, somebody just arrived. Joshua walks into the living room, still in his suit from work – he had probably been working overtime before he got here. He’s lively chatting away with Vernon, and you feel a clump building up in your chest. You swallow looking back at Nari, who looks as worried as ever.

“I’m just worried about you,” you admit.

“Worried about me?” She chuckles. “Why?”

“This thing with Vernon just seems to be moving too fast. Maybe you shouldn’t.” Your words are sharp as knives, and you can see how they cut through Nari’s bubbly personality.

“What are you talking about?” Nari furrows her eyebrows, her lips forming into a small pout as they always did when she was irritated.

“You’ve only known him for a few months–”

“Oh, so now you’re the expert on relationships? Why can’t you just be happy for me?”

“Because you’re not thinking straight!”

In a moment of emotional vulnerability, fueled by your own insecurities and the effects of a few too many drinks, you lash out at Nari. The noise of the party seems to fade as you focus on her, your voice rising.

“Be honest. Do you really think this is a good idea, Nari?” you blurt out, your words slurring slightly. “Moving in with Vernon so soon? You’re rushing into this without thinking!”

“Vernon and I are happy. This is what I want.”

“It’s not about what you want, it’s about what’s smart!” you snap, projecting your frustrations about your non-existent relationship with Joshua onto her newfound happiness. “You’re just setting yourself up for disappointment.”

The room falls silent, the party atmosphere dims as tension fills the space. Nari’s eyes well up with tears.

“I thought you were happy for me,” she says, her voice trembling. “Why are you being like this?”

Unable to contain your emotions, you storm out of the party, leaving behind a bewildered Nari and a gathering of uncomfortable guests. The weight of your actions settles heavily on your shoulders as you retreat into the night, grappling with regret and remorse for hurting your friend.

Alone in the quiet of the night, you reflect on the events that transpired. You realize that your anger towards Nari was misplaced, a manifestation of your own internal struggles rather than a reflection of her actions.

The guilt gnaws at you, urging you to confront the root of your insecurities and face the truths you've been avoiding. You walk as far as you can, which is just a block away before your feet start hurting from your heels. You huff over your uncomfortable shoes as you lean against a pole to try to take them off.

Concern etched on his face, Joshua steps out into the cool night air, searching for you. The city streets are bustling, but he spots you, slightly disoriented and clearly in need of assistance. Without hesitation, he approaches, gently guiding you with a steady hand. He makes you put your foot back down on the ground and bends down to fix the strap you had managed to loosen before he stands back up

“Hey, I’ve been looking for you. Are you okay?” Joshua asks, his voice is soft and concerned.

You’re surprised to see Joshua, a mix of relief and embarrassment washing over you as he helps steady your steps. Your mind races, trying to recall your address, but the fog of alcohol clouds your thoughts.

“I... I don’t know,” you mumble, your voice shaky. “I just yelled at my best friend about her perfect relationship, embarrassed myself in front of all of our friends, I’m cold and- and my fucking feet hurt!”

Tears begin to well up in your eyes, and Joshua reacts quickly by gently slipping off his suit jacket and draping it around your shoulders, providing warmth and comfort. Realizing the urgency of the moment, Joshua signals for a passing taxi and assists you as you climb into the back seat.

“What’s your address?” he asks.

However, over the drunken rambles and ugly sobs, he can’t hear a word that you’re saying. You wrap your arms around his bicep, pressing your forehead against his shoulder. You mumble something about just wanting to sleep. With a sigh, Joshua tells the driver his address and asks him to drive carefully. 

It doesn’t take long for the two of you to arrive at his condo, as it was only a few blocks away. The warmth and familiarity offer a stark contrast to the chaotic night outside. He ensures you’re settled comfortably on the couch as he helps you off with your shoes. Joshua mutters something about getting you a glass of water, and you hum in response. A few seconds later, he’s back with a tall glass of water which he makes you drink in its entirety.

“There you go,” he murmurs. “Okay, let’s get you into something more comfortable.”

Joshua gently guides you deeper into his apartment, his hand steady and reassuring on your back. You stumble slightly, the room spinning around you as you struggle to stay upright. When you reach the bathroom, he helps you sit down on the toilet seat, his touch careful and considerate. The cool porcelain feels surprisingly comforting against your flushed skin, and you lean back, feeling a wave of relief as the spinning sensation subsides a little.

After a minute, Joshua returns, his presence a welcome anchor in the disorienting haze. He places a pile of clothes neatly by the sink, their crisp, clean fabric a stark contrast to the disarray you feel inside. Alongside them, he sets down a box of makeup wipes, their crisp packaging promising a small, fresh start. Without a word, he leaves you alone, allowing you the space to collect yourself.

Once you’re dressed and feeling a bit steadier, you step out of the bathroom. The sight of Joshua waiting for you, his expression a mix of concern and care, brings a pang of guilt. His eyes soften as he takes in your appearance, and he offers a supportive smile as he helps guide you to the bedroom.

The journey to his bed is slow and steady, his hand a constant, reassuring presence on your arm. As you settle into the softness of the bed, the comfort of the sheets and the warmth of the room contrast sharply with the turmoil still churning inside you.

“I’m sorry–” you start, but Joshua quickly hushes you.

“Just rest,” Joshua says gently. “We’ll talk in the morning.”

You nod, grateful for his kindness as you close your eyes, the events of the night replaying in your mind. The weight of your actions and the need to address your inner turmoil hang heavily, but for now, you allow yourself to be enveloped by the warmth and safety of Joshua’s care.

As morning light filters through unfamiliar surroundings, you stir awake, feeling disoriented and unsure of where you are. Panic momentarily sets in as you try to piece together the events of the previous night. Your mind races with fragmented memories, leaving you uncertain about who you spent the night with.

Just then, the door opens quietly, and Joshua steps into the room with a gentle smile. Your heart skips a beat as you see him, cheeks flushing with embarrassment. Did you seriously sleep with Joshua for a second time in your drunken state? What did your drunk self have against your sanity?

“Morning,” Joshua says softly, his smile is warm but his eyes are filled with concern.

You sit up quickly, clutching the blanket to your chest. “Joshua, did we...?” you start, your voice trailing off in embarrassment.

He shakes his head, sensing your unease. “No, you slept in here,” he explains calmly, gesturing to the bed. “I took the couch to make sure you were comfortable.”

Relief floods you as you realize your assumption was wrong. “Oh, thank you,” you reply, nodding awkwardly, trying to collect yourself amidst the morning haze.

Joshua gives you a reassuring smile. “I made some breakfast. Why don't you join me in the kitchen?”

You follow Joshua with a mix of gratitude and lingering embarrassment, the weight of the previous night still heavy on your shoulders. As you enter his elegantly furnished kitchen, you’re struck by the refined simplicity of the space. The morning light filters softly through the windows, casting a warm, golden glow over the polished countertops and tasteful décor.

You sit across from Joshua at a beautifully set breakfast table. The gentle clinking of cutlery and the soft hum of the coffee maker are the only sounds that break the stillness of the calm morning.

As you begin to nibble on your food, your movements are tentative and slow, each bite a small effort to ground yourself. The flavors are comforting, but your mind is still tangled in the events of the night before. The tranquility of the kitchen contrasts sharply with the turmoil you feel inside, and you find yourself grappling with the lingering embarrassment while trying to process the events that led you here.

“How are you feeling?” Joshua asks, his voice gentle.

You sigh, looking down at your plate. “Honestly, a mess… I was so awful to Nari last night. I don’t know what came over me.”

Joshua leans forward, his expression attentive. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Although the situation was strange, you feel yourself fully able to talk to Joshua like this. The vulnerability in your voice is obvious as you begin to share your inner turmoil. “Seeing Nari so happy with Vernon just... it brought out all my insecurities. God– I hate myself for what I said to her.”

Joshua listens attentively, his presence a surprising comforting anchor amidst the storm of emotions. “We all have moments we're not proud of,” he says softly. “But recognizing them is the first step to making things right.”

You glance up, meeting his eyes. “I don't know how to fix this. I’ve hurt her, and I don't know if she’ll forgive me.”

“Give her some time,” Joshua advises. “And when you're ready, talk to her. Be honest about what you're going through. She'll understand.”

In the course of the conversation, there is a sense of relief and lightness as Joshua's empathetic and genuinely concerned responses provide reassurance. Yet, the enduring pain remains. The guilt for the actions towards Nari is now overshadowed by the guilt for the actions directed at Joshua.

“I’m sorry, Joshua,” you say. “I shouldn’t just have left.”

“You had your reasons.” Joshua lifts his coffee cup to his lips. “And I can’t say that I blame you– it was a little too much too fast. I told Vernon after you had left… you should’ve seen his face.”

The two of you break out into soft laughter, the tension between you slowly dissipating. The picture of Vernon’s shocked face is just too clear in your mind, and you end up letting out a snorting laugh. You both pause as you’re struck with embarrassment. When you look up at Joshua, you see a flash of opportunity glimmer in his eyes.

“Don’t,” you warn, but it’s too late.

Joshua struggled to stifle his laughter, but he couldn't help but emit a few chuckles. Under normal circumstances, you would have felt angry at his reaction. However, in the current situation, his amusement was contagious, and you found yourself unable to contain a smile.

“You know,” you say, “I’m actually glad you’re here. You’ve been more supportive than I could have asked for, and definitely more than I deserve.”

Joshua returns the smile, his eyes warm. “I’m just happy I could help.”

As the morning sun filters through the window, you find yourself sitting in the cozy intimacy of Joshua’s kitchen, sharing a heartfelt breakfast and conversation. In that tender moment, you feel a sense of clarity washing over you, marking a pivotal turning point in your relationship.

Realizing the weight of your words and actions from the previous night, you understand the need to mend fences with Nari. With a resolve fueled by introspection, you decide to take the first step toward reconciliation. You leave Joshua’s apartment to go back home, feeding Tofu and freshening up before you sit down on your bed with your phone in your hand.

Gathering your thoughts, you reach out to Nari, your fingers trembling slightly as you type a message on your phone. 

Hey Nari, I really want to apologize for last night. Can we meet up? I’ll be at our usual spot at 3.

After a few moments that feel like an eternity, a reply comes through. It’s a simple “Sure,” but it’s more than enough for you. You breathe a sigh of relief and quickly agree. The hours until the meeting drags by, your mind racing with thoughts of how to articulate your heartfelt apology.

At the café, you arrive early and sit down by your usual table, nervously fiddling with your cup of coffee. You’re not sure if she’ll even show up, and you wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t, but she, nevertheless, walks in through the door. When Nari walks in, you wave her over, standing up to greet her. She offers a tentative smile, but the hurt is still evident in her eyes. The atmosphere between you is thick with tension as she sits down.

“Hi,” you start, your voice trembling slightly. “Thanks for coming.”

Nari nods curtly, her expression guarded. Taking a deep breath, you dive in. “I’m really sorry for what I said last night. I know I hurt you, and that was never my intention. I let my own frustrations and insecurities get the better of me, and I took it out on you. It wasn’t fair, and I deeply regret it.”

Nari’s eyes remain hard, but she listens quietly. The tension is still there, hanging heavily in the air.

“The… incident with Joshua freaked me out a lot– I hadn’t been able to get it off my mind, and the thought of seeing him at your party only made it worse,” you continue, your voice wavering. “I guess, seeing you so happy with Vernon made me scared. I projected my emotions onto your situation. I know it’s no excuse for what I said...”

Nari’s expression softens slightly, but she remains silent, contemplating your words.

“I really am sorry, Nari. You didn’t deserve any of that,” you add, your voice barely above a whisper.

Nari takes a deep breath, her shoulders relaxing a little. “I understand where you’re coming from,” she says finally, her tone gentle. “I should’ve thought about your situation with Joshua... and I appreciate you being honest with me about what you’re going through.”

The tension in the air begins to dissipate, replaced by a sense of tentative understanding. “We all have our moments. What matters is that we’re able to talk about it and move forward,” Nari continues, a small smile forming on her lips.

"So, you'll forgive me?"

Nari pretends to think for a moment, before breaking out into a big smile. "I'll forgive you."

A wave of relief washes over you as you hear her words. “Oh, thank you, Nari. I promise I’ll do better.”

Nari reaches across the table to squeeze your hand. “I know you will… also you owe me a coffee.”

You release a hearty laugh, then briskly make your way to the barista to request another cup of coffee. As you return to your seat, you notice Nari gazing at you with a look of worry etched into her gentle smile.

“Did you get home okay last night?” she asks.

“I… didn’t get home,” you admit.

“What? You didn’t sleep outside, did you?” Her eyes widen as she raises her voice ever so slightly.

“Actually…” You lean forward and lower your voice. “I ended up at Joshua’s place.”

“What?”

You quickly shush her, and she repeats her “What?” in a lower volume. You smile at her, and she raises her eyebrows in a silent question. You shake your head.

“He took me home and let me sleep in his bed– he even slept on the couch,” you say. “I think… I’ll try asking him out again.”

“Really?” Nari gasps but quiets down as her coffee arrives.

She thanks the barista and waits for him to be out of earshot before she lets out an excited “Oh my god!” The two of you quickly fall into your usual banter.

It had been a long, arduous day at work, and you were finally ready to head home. The rain pattered against the office windows, creating a soothing yet melancholic backdrop to your thoughts. You hadn’t spoken to Joshua since that morning in his kitchen, and the awkwardness between you lingered like an unspoken shadow.

As you gathered your things and made your way to the exit, you unexpectedly bumped into Joshua. His eyes widened in surprise, but he quickly composed himself.

“Hey,” he said softly, holding up his umbrella. “Looks like we’re leaving at the same time.”

“Yeah,” you replied, forcing a smile. “Didn’t realize it was raining this hard. I would’ve taken the car this morning if I’d known.”

“Here,” he offered, extending the umbrella. “You can use this. I’ll be fine.”

You hesitate but then nod. “Thanks… How about we share it? We’re both going the same way, right?”

Joshua smiles, a hint of relief in his eyes. “Sure, let’s go.”

The two of you walked in silence under the umbrella, the rain a steady rhythm around you. It felt strange yet comforting to be so close to him after everything that had happened. When you reached the bus stop, the awkwardness slowly began to dissipate.

On the bus, Joshua found seats for both of you and as the vehicle jolted into motion, he broke the silence. “So, how’s everything with Nari?”

You smiled, genuinely happy. “We’re good. We talked it out, and we’re fine again.”

Joshua’s face lit up. “I’m glad to hear that. I hope you two don’t have to go through something like that again.”

You chuckled, teasingly. “Well, that depends on whether you're going to keep messing around with me or not.”

He looked at you with a soft smile, a serious look in his eyes. “I don’t want to mess around anymore.”

The bus pulled to a stop near your apartment. As you both got off, the rain still coming down, Joshua turned to you. “Can I ask you something?”

You nodded, heart pounding in your chest.

“Would you go out with me if I asked?” he asked, sincerity in his eyes.

You smiled, feeling a rush of warmth. “Yes.”

“Good...” He smiled, approaching you and taking your hands in his. “Go out with me?”

“You can do better than that,” you tease and he lets out a chuckle.

“Can you give me the pleasure of taking you out this weekend, sweetheart?” he asks again with a playful smile.

“Sure you can.”

It was still raining and there was no sign of stopping. You knew that if you went separate ways now, he’d give you his umbrella. Not wanting to be the cause of his cold, you invited him to your place. “Why don’t you come to my place and dry off? It’s just around the corner.”

The two of you walk under Joshua’s umbrella together, your shoulders brushing against each other. You speak of whatever comes to mind, mostly work and the cases you’re currently busy with – although the subject matter is something you usually keep at work, you don’t mind the banter.

When you arrive at your apartment, you open the door for Joshua as he shakes off the rain from his umbrella. The two of you get into the elevator, a tension building up that is unlike the ones you had felt before. Excitement is the only word you can use to describe it.

The building is tall, and you live far up, so the elevator takes its time to climb up the floors. Joshua stands next to you, his hand brushing against yours for a while. He takes it in his hand once the elevator doors open and lets you lead the way to your front door. His hand is warm in yours, sending a shiver down your spine. 

You only let go of his hand once the two of you stand in front of your door. Unable to keep his hands off of you for long, Joshua wraps his arms around your waist while you try to unlock your door. You let out a giggle, so unlike the laughs you have let out before that, you barely recognize it as your own, while your shaky hands struggle with the lock. When you finally open the door, you immediately spot a white, furry ball. Tofu meows at you, clearly annoyed with your late arrival.

“A cat.” Joshua’s voice is laced with surprise as he lets go of you.

You walk further into your apartment to pet Tofu, but he quickly sneaks past you and struts over to Joshua. He closes the door behind him quickly, scared that Tofu might walk out. Tofu has no interest in the outside, instead, he walks between Joshua’s legs and purrs.

“I thought I’d end up single for the rest of my life and decided to start early with the cats,” you quip playfully. “Tofu… really likes you.”

“Is that odd?” Joshua squats down and puts out his hand for Tofu to sniff. 

“He doesn’t like strangers…” you say, “Or anyone.”

Joshua grins at you as Tofu practically jumps into his arms. He stands back up with the cat in his embrace before he kicks off his shoes. You glare at your cat for betraying you, but Tofu barely meets your gaze.

“He’s cute,” Joshua says. “... and hairy.”

You look at Joshua’s black suit, completely covered in white fur. Quickly, you apologize and take Tofu from him. The cat lets out an irritated meow but doesn’t fight back. When Tofu has walked away, you take Joshua’s suit jacket and hang it up. You show him around the apartment, sneaking glances at him as he rolls up the sleeves of his button-down and loosens his tie. 

Eventually, the two of you found yourselves on the comfortable couch, indulging in a late-night meal created from the delicious remnants of takeout food in your refrigerator. The ambiance was soothing and unhurried, a welcome change from the earlier palpable strain. Tofu was nestled by Joshua’s side, emitting a robust and consistent purr akin to a well-oiled machine working at full capacity.

Joshua looked around your cozy apartment and then back at you. “This isn’t our first date, is it?”

You laughed softly. “It could be.”

He shook his head, smiling. “I want our first date to be special.”

You looked into his eyes, leaning over to put your hand on his knee. “It could be special if you wanted it to be.”

That’s how the two of you end up in your bedroom, with him on top of you. Joshua’s slowly thrusting into you, savoring every second. His forehead leans against yours, your hands traveling across each other’s bodies. Soft moans and gasps echo throughout the room, the noises mixing with the sounds of the bedsheets and the gentle rain against your windows.

“What are you doing to me?” Joshua sighs deeply, closing his eyes as if trying to steady himself.

“Is it really just me?” you ask playfully, although your voice tinged with uncertainty.

“It’s only you,” he reassures, his gaze meeting yours with a sincerity that cuts through the confusion.

You smile, pressing a chaste kiss on his lips. He surrounds you, embraces you, holds you, consumes you… The build-up is undeniable, and it only becomes more intense as Joshua’s hand travels between your bodies to rub lazy circles on your clit. He captures your lips in another kiss, slow and satisfactory. Whines and whimpers emanate from both of you as you near your high.

“I’m still on birth control,” you remind Joshua with a murmur against his lips.

Joshua groans at the silent promise of getting to cum inside you again. Ever since the last time he got a taste of you, he swears that he’s addicted. His hips stutter, and you clench around him to urge him closer to his release.

“Please,” he whispers hoarsely.

“Cum with me, baby,” you murmur.

Joshua releases inside of you with a moan, and your orgasm follows shortly after. A light encompasses you, flooding your veins with a kind of warmth that you’re not sure you’ve ever experienced. He stays inside of you even when his movements stop, his head finding its place in the crook of your neck. You rake your nails up his back until they find their way to the nape of his neck.

You press a kiss to his temple while you play with his hair. Joshua responds by pressing loving kisses to your neck. The two of you fall asleep just as he pulls out of you and lies down beside you under the covers.

As the gentle, golden glow of the morning sun filters through the delicate lace curtains, you slowly stir, feeling the warmth of his body and the reassuring strength of his embrace. In that soft, hushed moment, you find yourself waking up to a sense of peace and contentment that has been absent for what feels like an eternity.

As you try to get up to make breakfast, Joshua tightens his hold on you. “Don’t go,” he murmurs, his voice still heavy with sleep.

You laugh softly, kissing his forehead. “I need to get ready.”

He pouts playfully. “Stay here a little longer.”

You kiss him again, your heart full. “How about I get up if I promise to make you breakfast?”

Joshua pretends to think it over, then grins. “Deal.”

Your laughter fills the air as you rise from the bed, his warm hand gently holding onto yours just a moment longer. The morning was idyllic, brimming with shared laughter, precious moments, and the assurance of many more beautiful experiences together in the future.

As you and Joshua continue to move forward together, your journey unfolds as a delicate dance, intertwining professional ambitions with the deepening of your personal connection. Each day brings its own set of challenges, which you navigate hand-in-hand, discovering and growing through each other’s strengths and vulnerabilities.

You find solace in the way you support one another through the ebb and flow of your careers. Joshua’s unwavering faith in your potential becomes a beacon, encouraging you to reach beyond your comfort zone. In moments of self-doubt, his reassuring words and confident smile serve as a reminder of your capabilities, helping to reignite your determination.

In turn, you offer Joshua a steady anchor during his more tumultuous times. When he faces the pressure of a particularly grueling project or grapples with a professional setback, you’re there to remind him to pause and believe in his own strength. Your quiet support helps him regain his footing, providing him with the confidence to overcome the hurdles in his path.

With each shared success and challenge, your mutual respect grows deeper. Celebrating each other’s victories becomes a treasured ritual, whether it’s the joy of popping a bottle of champagne for a well-earned promotion or finding solace in each other’s company during quiet nights when things don’t go as planned. Every experience strengthens your bond, seamlessly weaving your lives together.

As you reflect on your journey, it becomes clear that embracing vulnerability and letting go of old insecurities has allowed you to discover not only love but also a profound sense of personal fulfillment. Joshua’s presence in your life has illuminated the truth that true growth often emerges from facing fears and embracing new possibilities.

One evening, curled up on the couch with Tofu nestled comfortably by your feet, you admit with a contented sigh, “I never thought I could be this happy.”

Joshua smiles warmly, his fingers gently brushing a stray strand of hair from your face. With a playful glint in his eye, he teases, “I know a few things that could make you even happier.”

“Shut up,” you reply, playfully swatting his chest.

Joshua’s laughter fills the room as he pulls you closer, enveloping you in his comforting embrace. You sigh contentedly as his familiar scent surrounds you, finding comfort in the perfect harmony of the moment. Even though you still have your moments of bickering and face the occasional rough patch like any other couple, you realize that this shared experience is as perfect as it gets.

feedback is always appreciated!

taglist: @enhacolor, @shuabby1994, @junhui-recs, @dkakapizzaboy, @just-here-to-read-01, @loviehan, @userjunhuii, @novalpha, @bubblymoon, @aaniag, @d0nghyuck, @fantasy2wonderland, @seunghancore, @woozixo, @niktwazny303, @lllucere, @uniq-tastic, @wonwoospartyhat, @stariightjoyy, @hyneyedfiz, @cali-snow, @crazywittysassy, @yeosayang, @wonuvs, @dokyeomkyeom, @kyeomiis, @gyuguys, @notevenheretbh1

[ctrlsht]

Fragment of the Past 03

pairing: patient!jungkook x psychiatrist!reader genre: thriller & yandere au

summary: You are a well-known and respected psychiatrist and author. You start treating Jungkook, who suffers from PTSD after surviving an extremely traumatic incident. As you help him confront his traumatic past, he begins to act strangely, and you start uncovering something about him that will change everything.

chapter summary: You thought that you could finally escape from Jungkook but little did you know that he has something more to hold against you. You endure everything that he did to you but he was too much until you can no longer take him anymore.

chapter warnings: hazing, fraternity, blackmailing, manipulation, smut, non con/dub con, fingering, oral sex (f receiving), mc was traumatized, stalking, murder, major character death word count: 11.3K

parts: (1) | (2) | (3)

note: This fiction will contain multiple mental disorders and psychology facts. I conducted my own research to avoid spreading misinformation, but there may be aspects I've overlooked, so I am open for any corrections.

"Why are you here? Aren't you aware of the restraining order?" You threw your pen on the table and stood up from your seat, while a sinister smile curled his lips. He continued to take a step towards you and you immediately pushed the buttons that connected to the reception desk. He only laughed before he spoke.

“It’s 9 in the evening, Y/N. No one’s here except for the both of us.” His words send shivers down your spine.

He was right, Soyeon and your other colleagues went home 3 hours ago and you’re the only one left inside. 

You love to overwork but right now, you wish that you just continue working at home. 

He’s going to kill you before the night ends. You’re sure of it. 

You reach your phone with a shaking hand as you scroll to your contact list and click Detective Jung’s number. 

“Who are you going to call? Detective Jung?” His words were like whispers from the depths of darkness.

Detective Jung isn’t answering your calls. 

“You’d be arrested once you come near me.” You tried to threaten him, but it only sounded like a joke to him.

He took a seat in his usual position as he intertwined both of his hands.

“I commend you for your cleverness when you ask for a restraining order against me,” He crosses his legs and touches his lips. “Unfortunately for you, it won’t stop me from attending our sessions."

“It’s my first time attending an evening session, is it also your first time, Dr. Y/N?” He said with a malevolent grin stretched across his lips.

“I swear, before the sun rises tomorrow, you’d be arrested.” You spoke, clenching your jaw. 

“With how fast you climb to the top, I thought you were smart, Y/N. But I was wrong.” He pokes the inside of his cheek as he smirks. “You should know by now the reason why I’m not in jail for killing my mother.” 

You weren’t able to respond, like a cat caught your mouth. 

“I thought that you’ll do great in kicking me out of your life so I came prepared. I even thought that you’d approach a different detective for this one, and fortunately, you still decide to approach Detective Jung.” He pauses to let out his laughs. “Don’t you know that he was the reason why I’m still free? He’s my best friend, Y/N!” A sinister laugh erupted from his throat as your body started to shake. 

“I even came up with a plan with my lawyer if ever I was arrested but damn Y/N, I somehow wish that you give me a thrill. You made my life easier than I expected.”

As he said those words, your legs turned to jelly, and a tightness gripped your chest. 

You’ve underestimated him and his power and now, your life's on the line. 

“Go ahead and ruin my reputation. Upload those recordings online, I don’t care anymore. I can’t stomach you anymore, Jungkook.” You spoke in a serious tone, before fixing your things.

“Are you sure about that?” He asked, a smile evident in his voice.

“If you think you need to use those recordings to destroy me, feel free to do so. I won't participate in this any longer. I refuse to be a part of your games, Jungkook.” 

“Oh, Y/N.” He sighs before he continues. “If you think that this is all about you, you’re wrong.” He stood up and took out his phone from his pocket. You’re about to go but he thrust his phone in your chest. “Watch it because you’d love to see what kind of a person your best friend really is.” He smirks and you look at his phone. It was a video and you were scared to play it. The thumbnail is Taehyung standing in front of a man with their eyes blindfolded. Taehyung looks so young in here and you aren’t sure what’s happening. One way to find out. 

You wish you didn’t take his phone. You wish that you just proceed on walking out of your clinic, leaving him inside because when you play the video, you immediately hear a painful scream coming from a man. It wasn’t Taehyung who’s screaming, instead, a man was kneeling and bleeding while his eyes were blindfolded, and Taehyung was hitting him with a baseball bat.

Holy shit. 

Taehyung looks so young in the video. His hair was blonde, it’s his hair when he was 17 or 18, as you remember. You can’t believe what you saw. The man that he’s hitting is begging for him to stop but he doesn't. Instead, he hit him harder. 

Your hands were trembling, almost dropping the phone as you stopped the video from playing. 

What was that?

“Why do you look so scared, Y/N? It’s your best friend.” Jungkook slowly took the phone from your hand. 

Your body trembled uncontrollably, fear had taken hold of your very core. You looked at him, shaking your head.

“That’s not Taehyung.” You said.

“Oh Y/N, I wish you’re right, but it was him.” He chuckled. He takes a few steps back and places his right hand on his pocket as he scrolls to find something on his phone. 

When he finds it, he shows his phone once again. You were confused because it’s a group of male people and when he noticed your confusion, he zoomed the screen and you saw Taehyung in the photo.

“He’s part of underground society way back before he was an artist and that's when I knew him, Y/N. He was one of the people who performed the initiation rites for the new members, and that video you just saw? It’s what he does for the society he’s in.”

You can’t believe it, you refuse to believe it. Taehyung won’t do that. He won’t harm—

“Why do you look so shocked?” He asked with a grin on his face, mocking you. “You should know that, as his best friend.” 

“That’s not him.” You said, trying more to convince yourself. “Taehyung can’t do that. He won't take part in that kind of behavior.”

“Then you don’t really know your friend.” He placed his phone back in his pocket. “Stop being too naive, Y/N. Everyone has their own secrets to keep.” 

“Do you really think that I would believe you? Whatever shit you’re trying to pull, you won’t make me believe you.” You said in your sharp tone.

“But the people will.” He took a step towards you with a smirk on his lips. 

“You may refuse to believe it but the people will. They will believe so easily in whatever’s happening in that video.”

Your heart pounded in your chest, each beat resonating with the intensity of the madness you feel. You never felt this kind of anger before. It’s too much that you wanted to kill him.

“What do you want?! What do you really want!” Your rage erupted like a blazing fire, smacking his chest aggressively. You keep on smacking and pushing him, while he doesn't even show any hint of pain. “Why are you doing this to me!” you shouted, tears welling up in your eyes and when you got tired, your hits became slower until you decided to stop. 

Jungkook held your wrist and looked at your eyes with intensity. You cannot resist him anymore because you’re too tired. 

“What do I want?” He repeated the question while staring at your eyes. “It’s simpler than you think.” His words were soft as a smile formed on his mouth. “I want you, Y/N.” 

You sob before you release your wrist from his grip. “I can’t have another session with you. You’re not cooperating.” You respond, letting out a weary sigh.

“That’s not what I mean.” He shook his head, slowly scanning your face down to your body. “I want you without your clothes, laying down while I am on top of you.”

You immediately shook your head. “No fucking way. I won’t let you do that.” 

“Then you agreed to let me upload your illegal voice recordings with your patients along with the video of your best friend, beating the hell out of an innocent man. I bet the people will love to see what their idol really is, right?”

You’re already bursting out of tears, shaking your head. “Please don’t involve him anymore.” 

“It’s your own fault, Y/N. The only thing that I want is a session with you until I recover, yet you pushed my limits. Now, you have to face the consequences of your actions.” He takes a step towards you, leaning forward to see your face full of tears and wipe them using the both of his finger thumb. You hit his arms and took a step backwards.

“You’re sick.” You turn around to gather your things and when you’re about to leave, he speaks.

“I’m telling you, you don’t want to test me because you wouldn’t like the ending.”

—

That same night, you didn't go home; instead, you went straight to Taehyung's place. He wasn't there because he had a shoot, but you waited. You couldn't wait any longer. You couldn't bring yourself to believe what you had seen unless it came directly from him. You've known Taehyung since birth, and you were certain that the videos and photos you had just seen couldn't be him because you knew he wouldn't do such things.

Yet you don’t understand why you felt betrayed even though you haven’t talked to him.

 When he arrived, that’s the first thing you ask him and it’s too obvious that he didn’t anticipate it. As the longer he can’t respond, the ache you feel worsens.

“Answer me, Kim Taehyung. Are you a member of an underground society?” You repeat the question, emphasizing every word.

“Where did—

“Just answer me!”

Taehyung was taken aback with your screams and a fear is evident in his face. He stood there frozen, unable to move or look away. He sighs before he speaks.

“Yes.”

Your body hunched, eyes closed as a tear streamed down your face. You lowered your body, squatted and your shoulders shook with each shuddering sobs.

“Y/N, w-why?” Taehyung immediately went to you but when his hand landed on your shoulder, you stood up, immediately pushing him away.

“You beat people, Taehyung! You beat them to death, you monster!” 

“Y/N, please let me explain—

“Explain what?! How the fuck you beat them until they die?!”

“It’s not my choice! They were threatening to kill me if I didn’t do what they wanted!”

You glared at him, choosing not to respond. 

“I thought it was a normal organization when I joined but I was tricked! I tried to leave but they didn’t let me and they even threatened to kill me if I reported them to the police! I was just 17 years old at that time, Y/N! I didn’t know what to do!” 

He was trembling as a tear formed in his eyes. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“Because I was scared that they would involve you. It’s a trap.”

“So you were still involved with them?” Your voice raised and he immediately shook his head.

“No! I managed to get away when we were caught doing the initiation rite, but I managed to run away without being caught. I wasn’t the one performing the initiation rite during that time so it was easy for me to run away.” He explained.

You only stare at him, imagining the 17-year-old Taehyung standing in front of you. During that time, you don't remember anything that may hint he was in danger. The only Taehyung you saw was the jolly and energetic Taehyung, not knowing that he was facing a dangerous situation.

Little did you know that 12 years from now, you’d also face the same situation like he does.

You took a step towards him and wrapped your arms around him, sobbing uncontrollably. You can’t imagine he faced that problem all by himself at that age. You were supposed to be with him as he faced his battles, but he was all alone. 

“Why didn’t you tell me even after you managed to run away?” You spoke, choked sobs wracked your body as he stroked your back gently. 

“It’s okay, it’s all in the past.”

You were in that position for a few moments until you calmed down. You break away from him and wipe your own tears. 

“How did you find out?” with that, you’re back from reality, the reason why you are here. 

“I saw a video of you beating a man. That’s how I found out.” His mouth hung open as his breath came in short.

“Where did you watch it?”

"An anonymous sender sent me the video. I couldn't bring myself to save the video because I can't bear to watch it again, so I deleted it," You reason out. You can’t tell him the truth because it will only complicate things more. “But I already reported it to the authorities and a security specialist and they guarantee that the person responsible for it will be caught.”

You felt bad for lying but you can’t tell him the truth. It wasn’t a good idea to confront him about this manner in the first place but you were not in your right mind when you decided to go here. You were caught off-guards. 

You just need to make sure that no one will see that video again. How? That’s also something you don’t know yet. 

—

Jungkook hasn’t bothered you lately, and it only worsens your anxiety. You know him and he won’t simply stop. You don’t know what’s his next move but soon, he’ll come after you. 

You always check what’s trending on social media, watching out for any news that can relate to you and Taehyung, but you’ve always found nothing. You even checked on Jungkook’s latest activities on their media pages and there’s nothing suspicious, yet you can still feel the lash that Jungkook tied on your neck.

You’re on your way for a book interview because your newest book entitled ‘The Paradox of Choice’ is about the launch. You’re nervous and you’re overthinking everything without a specific reason why. 

The feeling you felt right now is different from your previous book launching because right now, you don’t feel good. 

Maybe because you've been stressing lately with what’s happening right now or maybe because something is going to happen.

You wish it wasn’t the latter. 

“Three more minutes!” The crew announced.

This book launch is coming along with an interview at an evening talk show. You’ve experienced guesting in several talk shows yet, you felt so anxious that your trembling worsened as the minute passed by.

“Hey, are you okay?” Your assistant held your hand as you stood up. You looked at her and gave her a smile that didn’t reach your eyes.

“Yes, I am okay.” 

As you get closer towards the stage, your heartbeat increases. You pause for a while and take a deep breath, while closing your eyes. 

You can do this.

“Good evening, Dr. Y/N! How are you doing?” Park Jimin—the host asked you with a wide smile on his face.

“I’m great, how are you?” you try to connect the level of your energy to his. 

“I’m great as well! Are you ready? I know you won’t get too nervous since you have been a guest in several talk shows and interviews, right?” Oh, how you wish that’s your case.

“Of course! I look forward to this!”

You had a few talks with Jimin, explaining how the show will flow and you also reviewed the possible questions that he’s going to ask you. You were starting to get comfortable being on the stage. The rolling is about to start when your eyes land on a familiar figure wearing a black hoodie along with a headphone on his head. Your eyes widened in a complete terror, as your pulse raced with each thudding heartbeat.

Jeon Jungkook is here, staring at you with a demonic smile on his face.

“Rolling! We’ll begin in 3… 2… 1.” He was looking at you while he spoke on his headphones. Your surroundings turned into a blur as you felt that every movement was in slow motion. You notice that Park Jimin is already talking with so much energy and you try to wake yourself up.

“What inspires you to write this book? Was there a particular experience or realization that led to its creation?”

You grip your hand to stop its trembling before you answer. “People tend to choose their biggest life decisions when they are in an emotional state, and this book will teach everyone to always think twice or even thrice whenever they make big decisions for themselves. I, myself once experience choosing a decision that I wish I did not choose, and it lend me to regrets, which I don’t want people to experience that’s why I wrote ‘The Paradox of Choice.’” 

You try not to look at Jungkook after you respond but your own eyes are betraying you. There’s a sly smile on his lips as his eyes bore into you. 

You fucking hate it when his eyes are on you.

“How did you research and gather information for your book? Can you describe your process?” You froze on your seat when Jimin asked you that question. Your hands tremble even more, gripping it tightly to stop. You glance at Jungkook who’s standing meters away from you, playing his lips with his fingers. 

You don’t want to answer this because your method of gathering information for your book is what he obviously uses against you.

‘I record the sessions with my patients and analyze it to add an input to the book.’

It was the answer that you cannot say while he’s watching. 

Instead, “I did my own research with the help of my patient’s own experiences.”

Even in your peripheral view, you could still feel his eyes digging into your soul.

Once the shoot is done, you immediately storm out of the stage and lock yourself inside the comfort room for god knows how long. 

You stood before the sink, hands outstretched beneath the gentle stream of cool water pouring from the faucet as it ran down to your hands. 

You slowly rub both of your hands but the trembling of it isn’t stopping. You rub it even further to steady your hands, until you suddenly outburst silently. You can’t scream or cry, and the only thing you can do is endure the anger you feel right now. 

The soft hum of fluorescent lights filled the space with white glow, opposite of what you feel right now. Your hands are still trembling as you look at your face in the mirror. 

You look so horrible. 

When you’re stressed out because of your workloads, you can still appreciate the beauty you have, but right now, you really look so miserable. 

Jungkook is doing his excellent job in fucking you up. 

This is driving you insane. He’s driving you insane. You’re fed up with all of his shit and it’s too much already. You don’t even know what you did wrong for him to do this to you. The only thing you did is help him cope up with his trauma–or more like fake traumas. 

So you don’t know where you went wrong with him. 

Your assistant called your name on the other side of the door, asking if you’re fine which you’re not. You did your best to calm down before you decided to come out. 

It’s almost midnight when you’ve finished packing your things and ready to leave. Everyone’s out already and you don’t know who was left. You’re supposed to go home an hour ago but you choose to rest for a while before you go. 

The basement parking lot was nearly empty when you arrived; not even the guards were visible. But, as you approached your car, you noticed a tall, muscular man standing beside it, wearing a black hoodie, with both of his hands inside his pockets, clearly waiting for you.

He looked up when he noticed your presence, he stood straight, greeting you with a smirk on his face. 

“What took you so long?” Jungkook asked, a sly smile still on his face. 

“What do you want?” You pondered, glaring at him. 

He scoffed, “You always ask the same question over and over even though you already know the answer.” 

You didn’t respond, ignoring him, as you walked towards the driver’s seat but before you even opened the door, he already blocked you. 

“Don’t ignore me while I’m talking to you.” He threatened, eyes buried on you. 

“I have no more business with you.” You answered, passing by him as you opened the front door. 

“As far as I remember, we still have business going on.” He said, provoking you even more. 

You placed down your things on the passenger seat and before you could even hop on, he spoke.

“You’re brave enough to ignore me now. Why? Do you think I’m already done with you?” His voice dripped with a mocking undertone, a wry smirk played on his lips as he spoke.

“Or you’d be glad to see you and your best friend in the news by tomorrow morning?”

You clenched your jaw, glaring at him as you balled your fist. “I’ve already done what you want. I let you continue our remaining sessions but you go beyond that and pester me for almost 3 times a week! What more do you want?!” 

He tilted his head, licking his lips, trying his best to hide his teasing smile. He clicked his tongue before he spoke. “That's the second time you ask that question. Do you have other questions in mind that you’d like to ask?” 

“When will you ever stop?” He instantly laughed at your question. 

“You didn’t even hide the fact that you already want me out of your life.”

“I never try hiding it.”

“You’re becoming stronger and bolder now, Y/N. Well, I prefer this rather than seeing you crying your ass out begging me to stop. Unless, you’re crying as you scream my name.” He wore a suggestive smirk, provoking you even more.

“You’re sick!”

“You’ve been asking what I want and I’ve already told you, Y/N. I hate it when I keep repeating myself. You’re not stupid, you know that.” He arched a brow, a scornful stare bore into you. 

“And you’re delusional if you think I’d agree with that.”

“Then suit yourself and make sure that you won’t regret your decision.” He smirks, biting his lower lips.

“What are you gonna do?” You asked but when he didn’t answer and turned away, you screamed at him. 

“Jungkook, what the fuck are you going to do?!”

He scoffed before he looked back. “You’ll see.”

—

You want to die.

You just fucking want to die and bring Jungkook along with you.

Your emotions churned like a violent sea, a mix of anxiety, anger and fear that threatened to overturn you. Your heart pounded with rage, and your fingers trembled with fear as you held your phone, trying to avoid dropping it.

A video posted on twitter is playing from your phone, a video that you saw a few days ago.

You felt like throwing up when you saw that video again. Taehyung's face is blurred, but you can tell it's him. People might struggle to identify the person beating up an innocent man, but it won't take long for them to figure it out.

‘I wonder if you guys have any hint of who’s that man on the video? I bet you guys know because you love him so much. But I also wonder if you know your idol’s true color.’

The caption says, and the account is made to specifically attack and throw hate to people.

This could be Jungkook, but you weren't certain because he could have asked others to do it to avoid implicating himself. He has a reputation to maintain as well.

101k views, 5k reposts and 26k likes. 

‘Holy shit. Why do I feel like it’s Beom Seok from Horizon?’

‘This should be taken down.’

‘Eun Dae used to be a member of a fraternity before he become an idol lmaooo’

‘Taehyung was also rumored to be part of a frat before but it hasn't been proven yet.’

Fucking hell. Taehyung must know this shit already and you don’t know what to do. It should be taken down but the video was posted 2 hrs ago and you just saw it right now. Even though it was taken down, people already saved it from their devices.

You were still in the middle of breaking down when your phone rang, and when you saw the caller ID, your blood erupted.

It was Jeon Jungkook. You scream on your phone before you decline the call. You were about to turn your phone off when he sent a message that angered you even more.

‘Decline the call one more time, you will see the video again and I will make sure that the face of Taehyung is visible for everyone to know that it’s him.’

Your hands grew cold and started to shake when your phone rang once again. You had been clenching your teeth before deciding to answer the call.

“How are you, Doc?” He greets you in his sweet voice that only annoys you even more. “Do you think that I wouldn’t do it?” He added, releasing a sarcastic laugh. 

“Take it down, Jungkook.” Your words dripped with menace. 

“You’re the one who made me do it. It’s your fault, Y/N.”

“You monster! Why do you have to involve him?! He didn’t even do anything!” You screamed, pulling your hair out of anger.

“I know but you care for him so much. It’s a natural thing to involve him.”

Your tears run through your cheek as you collapse from the ground. You’re starting to lose your sanity. 

“What do you want?” You spoke in a low voice.

“You want to know? Come here at my place and I will let you know, Y/N.”

—

You’ve expected that Jungkook is living in a high end luxurious apartment building but you didn’t expect that it would be in the highest floor, a penthouse. 

Jungkook noted that he left the door unlocked so you can enter without him opening it for you. You were scared of what could happen inside his penthouse given the fact that he’s a dangerous person by murdering his own mother but you’re desperate to stop him. 

Your heart was pounding when you opened his double-door and as expected, it was unlocked.

You are greeted by a huge area of floor-to-ceiling windows that frame breathtaking panoramic views of the whole city lights. The living room is adorned with designer furniture, a monochromatic symphony of blacks, grays, and whites, and a wall adorned with abstract art that speaks Jungkook's taste.

The place is beautiful, opposite to the person living in here. 

“You came.” You immediately turned around when you heard his demonic voice behind. He’s in the corner of the stairs from the second floor as he slowly steps down, hands in his pocket with a smirk on his lips. 

“Take that video down.” You glared, speaking with your teeth.

“Or else, what? Are you going to report me again? ” He stopped in the middle of the stairs, placing his hands on the railings. He scoffs when you don't respond. “You should know by now that it won’t work, Y/N.” He added, continuing to step down. 

“I’m already here, so tell me what the fuck do you want?” You raised your voice, itching to know what he really wants. 

“Why are you in a hurry, Doc?” He was about to touch your face when you blocked his hands, throwing it away.

“Take that video down, Jungkook.” You spoke, trying to contain yourself. 

He smirks before he turns away and takes a step towards his kitchen island, pouring wine on his wine glass. 

"I've already done that for being such a good and obedient girl." He sips on his wine, not breaking eye contact with you. “But I can upload it again if you choose to test my patience.” He adds. You bite the inside of your lower lips to prevent yourself from attacking him. 

“Why did you even ask me to be here?” 

“Didn’t I tell you before? I want you, Y/N.” 

He poured wine in another glass and walked towards you, handling the wine for you, but you just glanced at it and returned your gaze to him.  

“Let’s not waste time and tell me what the fuck you want so I can leave now.” You said in gritted teeth.

“I already told you, so stop being stubborn and drink this wine before I change my mind and upload the video with your best friend's face clearly visible along with the illegal recordings you had with your patient.” In an instant, he shifted from a playful smirk to a sudden seriousness, dropping the playful facade. 

You take the wine in his hands and he asks you to drink but you immediately shake your head. “I’m not going to let you poison me.”

“If I’m going to do that, I already did when I first walked into your office. It’s easier to kill you than to kill my mother, if that’s what you want to hear.” His words sent shivers down your spine, forcing yourself to sip in the glass as the taste of rich, velvety smoothness of the wine caressed your tongue. He smirks when he is satisfied with your sip. 

“See, you’re still alive.” 

He turned around taking a step forward and telling you to follow him, but when you didn’t, he looked back and his unyielding gaze bore into you. “Are you coming or do you want me to drag you from where you stand right now?”

You swallow hard, trying not to prevent yourself from showing any signs of fear, but it was harder than you thought because you’re in his territory. 

“Are you going to kill me?” Your words come out as a whisper but he was able to hear it and when he does, he grins. 

“Why, are you scared?” He took a sip from his wine, eyes fixed on you. “To answer your question, no, I’m not going to kill you.”

“Then where are you taking me?” 

“We’ll have dinner, now start to move before I drag you to the dining table.”

You indeed had dinner with him and several dishes were served on the long table. By just looking at what is served, you immediately remember that you hadn’t eaten anything yet since morning and everything you see is appetizing. The whole dining room was magnificent. The space was bathed in a war, golden glow of crystal chandelier that hung from a high, ornate ceiling. If you were in a different situation, you’d love to stay here.

Obviously, your life’s on the line and you can’t just eat and relax right now. 

“Don’t you like the food? Why aren’t you eating much?” He asked before he took another bite of his steak.

You’ve tasted what’s in front of you and it was so insanely good, but you can’t eat much by just thinking of what situation you have right now. 

"I'm not hungry," you reasoned out, then sipped your glass of water. You glanced around to see if there was anyone else in the vicinity, but you saw nothing, not even maids or cooks. It was the perfect opportunity for him to kill you, with no one else around except the two of you.

“I doubt. I know that you haven’t eaten anything. Go and enjoy your meal. It won’t harm you.” You only stare at your plate, trying to wash away the negative thoughts you have. You took another bite of your steak and you can’t help but to crave more on how it tastes so good. 

“I could tell that you like the steak, but you’re having a hard time enjoying it. I wonder what’s running through your mind.” He placed both of his elbows on the table and intertwined his fingers. 

“Will you let me go after this meal?” Your question made him chuckled, loud and mocking. 

“Here you go again, so desperate to leave me.” He commented, wiping the corner of his lips with a table napkin. 

“If you just tell me what you’re planning to do, then I wouldn’t keep asking you.” You answered, taking a sip of your water. 

“This is the plan you’re asking about. Didn’t I tell you before that I wanted to take you out for dinner to show my gratitude for being my therapist? That’s what I’m doing right now.” He grabs his wine glass and leans back before he whirl the glass, taking a sip from it.

“That’s it? That’s what you want? To take me out for dinner?” You asked like you can’t believe what he just said. 

“Why, what do you expect?” He placed his elbow on the arm rest and played with his lips; the mannerisms he does when he’s enjoying something. 

“You must be kidding me right now. I know you want something more. I know you, Jungkook. I know you.”

“If you claim to know me so much, then you should know that I am serious with what I want from you.” His eyebrow furrowed, gazing at you with intensity. “That’s the problem with people like you. You think too much and it leads you to danger.” He scoffs.

He stood up from his seat and took a step towards you, while you didn’t move an inch from your position. 

“From the moment I walked into your office, I know from myself that I want you. With your long hair falling back beautifully to the tight black dress you wore, I immediately agreed to take the sessions with you.” He stood beside you from your seat, resting his hands on the backrest of your chair while you were there, completely frozen. 

“Hoseok and my lawyer Namjoon told me that I should act like the incident causes me trauma to prevent them from suspecting me to be the culprit. I did not agree because it’s bullshit but they keep on convincing me.” He chuckled as he remembered something. “I planned on attending a single session and I won’t show up again but when I saw you sitting on your office chair with a bright smile on your pretty face, I thought that attending sessions with you won’t be that bad after all.”

He caresses your hair and you try not to flinch, clenching your jaw. 

“I do enjoy the sessions we had because you’re so entertaining to watch. You talked as if you know everything but the truth is, you don’t. I just let you think that way because you’re so passionate about what you do. I don’t want to ruin your ego, Doc.” 

He kept on caressing your hair and when you couldn't take it anymore, you stood up, facing him with anger on your face. 

“I’m done with my meal. I’m going home.” You gazed at him with a piercing stare, picking up your things. 

“You think I will let you leave just like that?” An ominous aura surrounded him when `he spoke. You’re trying to strengthen yourself as you take a step towards the door, but before you even made it, he spoke again. “Get back here, Y/N.” He threatened. 

“Stop playing with me, Jungkook.” 

“Try to take another step and I will make sure that before this night ends, your career is over as well as your best friend’s. You know that I can do it, Y/N. You wouldn’t like to test me again.” A cold, sinister flowed from his voice.

You didn’t dare take another step, afraid of provoking him even more. You hate that he can control you with just the use of his words. You still have the lash on your neck, making him take control over you. 

“That’s right, be the good girl that you are, Y/N.” He said, with a smirk on his lips. He placed his hands inside his pocket as he slowly walked towards you. “I don’t understand why you keep giving me that kind of behavior but you can’t stand by it.” He towered over you and he tried to touch your cheek but before he even did it, you avoided his touch and took a step backward.

He smirks, staring at you before he speaks again. “Even if you try to avoid me, I will still find my way to you, Y/N. If I were you, I wouldn't waste my time doing that.” He walks back to the long table and grabs his wine glass and takes a sip on it without leaving his eyes on you. 

You didn’t move nor say anything, observing his movements. You’re at his territory and you couldn’t risk provoking him because he can do anything to you without the people knowing what’s happening inside his penthouse.

He grabbed the new bottle of wine and opened it, filling up your wine glass, walking towards you, and handling you the glass. You only stare at it and Jungkook gestures to you to take it. 

“Hurry up and get it, Y/N. My arms are starting to numb.” He said and you are left without a choice, so you take the wine from his hands. “Go drink it.”

You look at the wine glass and there are a few bubbles underneath it and you swallow hard before you take a sip from it. 

“Finish it up, Y/N. Don’t make me tell you everything you have to do.”

You wanted to cry but you didn’t let your guards down. You’re starting to regret going here. 

You chug the wine while your hands are trembling and he smiles after you finish it. 

“That’s right, you’re such a good girl.” He took the glass from you and placed it back on the table. 

After a few moments, your heartbeat increases rapidly and your whole body starts to tremble. Jungkook was just looking at you as he enjoyed his wine and you suddenly felt so weak, your head started to ache.

There is something wrong with the wine.

You take a deep breath, fighting the weakness within you. You wouldn’t want to show that you’re getting weak in front of him. You walk back to your seat and grab your things before looking at him.

“I really have to go. I have a lot of things to do.” You spoke in your low voice, being careful of your actions.

Jungkook pouted in a sarcastic way. “There’s no way I’m letting you go.” he answered before he smirked. Your headache worsened but you didn’t show any signs of your weakness.

He walked towards you and you admit that you’re getting scared of what he might do. You step back but there is no more space because the table is already bumping your back. He raised his hand to touch your face once again but you blocked his touch.

And in a snap of a finger, he aggressively grabbed your face using only a single hand and his eyes suddenly filled with darkness. “Stop resisting me, Y/N. You can’t win over me.” He spoke in a low but sinister tone. 

Your limbs trembled uncontrollably, unable to withstand the weight of your fear. After a few seconds of staring at your soul with so much intensity, he already released his firm hold on your face but he didn’t move away. Instead, he slowly traces your face with his fingers.

Your weakness worsens and you can’t move nor think anymore. The only thing you can do is let him touch you.

“I love it so much when the cause of your weakness is me.” 

Your eyes widen as you gasp silently when his lips crushes on you. It was hard and you tried to move away but he gripped your arm, unabling you to move. You were trying to push him but because of your weakness, it didn’t even move an inch. 

“Open your mouth, baby girl.” He commands as he speaks in between his kisses. 

“Jungkook s-stop—

“I told you not to fight me.”

His lips went down on your neck sucking your skin and you used all your strength to push him away but he was too strong. He locked your hand on the table as he shifted his kiss on your lips and neck. Your body is shaking and tears are now flowing from your cheek and when he notices it, he stops, staring at you without removing his grip on your hand from the table.

“If you keep being difficult, I fucking swear that you wouldn’t make it out alive and I will make sure that your bestfriend will fall on the ground so hard that he can never recover.” He whispers in your ear, making you stand frozen with a pounding heart. 

You were too weak to fight and you’re sure that it’s not only because he’s dangerous but there is something in the wine you just drank. 

He stares at your face, like memorizing every feature of it. He lifts his hand, slowly wiping your tears away. He traces your face before he moves closer to peck your forehead. His lips were soft on your skin, but it only sent shivers down your spine.

“You don’t have to be scared because I will bring heaven to you.” He whispers before he sucks your ear lobe. 

He held your waist while kissing you, pushing his tongue inside. His lips were so soft and you could taste the bittersweet of the wine he just drank a few moments ago. His hands were traveling around your body while his lips were still on yours. You wanted to push him and run away but you know that you couldn’t do that because before you even reach his gigantic door, you’re probably dead. 

“Do you know how much I crave for you, huh?” He tried to speak in his desperate kisses as his breath became heavier. “From the first time I step in your office, you never leave my head. You fucking drive me insane.”

He lifted you up to the table as his kisses became aggressive and you were just there, being helpless. 

He cupped the back of your neck as he sucked it leaving a bruise before his hands traveled down to your thighs and caressed them. His hands were burning through your skin and you deny that your body starts to burn as well. He lifts you up and your thighs are in between his body carrying you to an unfamiliar room and the next thing you know, you’re already laying down on a bed. 

Your back slowly touched the soft mattress as he started to crawl on the top of you. Your body is trembling and your heart is beating so fast as he brushes your face with the back of his fingers. 

“This is what I really want, Y/N. Me on the top of you.” The room is dark but you could still see the glimpse of his face with how the moon illuminated the darkness of the room. He gently strokes your face down to your neck, until it reaches your chest. He leans forward and places his ears on your chest, listening to your pounding heartbeat. “Just by listening to your heartbeat is enough for me to get turned on.” He whispers in your ears before he brushes his lips to your neck, immediately feelings his hot and wet breaths. 

Your breath rose when you felt his fingers crawling underneath your shirt, fingers wandering at your bare skin. You suddenly flinch when his fingers rub your breast, making him smirk. “You like it when I touch you like this?” He asked in his low and seductive voice, and when you didn’t respond, his fingers circles your nipples slowly causing you to moan. 

You’re wearing a dress and he slowly lifts the end of it, completely taking your dress off and when he did, he gave a peck on your breast before removing your bra. A sudden sense of unwanted pleasure filled your body as he sucked your left breast while massaging the other one, leaving a tingle on your stomach. It didn’t take long before his lips connected on yours, slipping his tongue, letting out another moan. He moves his mouth down to your neck once again, sucking it while his other hand is trailing down your back.

His fingers travel down on the waistband of your underwear, leaving soft kisses. “I’ve always wondered how your bare body looks, and it’s exactly how I imagine. So sexy and gorgeous.” He played with the waistband of your underwear before he slowly pulled it down, leaving you gasping. 

You’re at the verge of crying when he spreads your legs apart, exposing your bare pussy, leaning down and leaving a kiss on your pelvic bone. You tried to push your body deeper in the mattress to avoid his kisses, but he only grips your hips firmly to prevent yourself from moving. “Stop fighting, Y/N.” He said with a stone voice. 

He leaves a last peck on your pelvic bone, moving down on your clit before he kisses it, leaving you panting. You resist yourself from whimpering but when he slides a tongue on your clit, you groan. You were fighting the pleasure that you felt, but the more he keeps on licking your folds, the more your body burns.

"Fuck baby, you taste just like how I imagined it. So sweet for me."

You were disgusted at yourself for feeling something so good, and disgusted at him for doing this to you. 

“You act like you don’t like what you feel, but with how wet you are, it only proves how you love this so much.” He said—almost sounds like a whimper. Your eyes widened when you felt his fingers circling your clit before he slowly inserted it inside. You moan so loud when he moves his fingers as he licks your clit and you cry with the burning sensation radiating to you. 

You weren’t a virgin and you’ve hooked up several times, yet you can’t admit it to yourself that he was doing good eating you out. 

“No matter how you say that you hate me, your body will never lie.” He whispers, as he drag his finger inside and out in a quicker motion. 

No matter how you stop yourself from moaning, that sound escapes your mouth. 

Pain leaves you when he pulls his fingers and when you look at him, he removes his shirt revealing his chiseled and sculpted body. He leans forward to slide his fingers inside your mouth, letting you taste yourself before he slides his tongue. A moan escaped you when he rubbed his fingers on your clit, feeling your wetness, before he inserted his finger once again. 

You’re trying your best not to let out another moan but your body is betraying you because you were moaning in between his lips that you could feel his smirk. 

“Don’t be hard on yourself and let yourself enjoy it, baby girl.”

After a few moments of him fucking your pussy with his fingers, your whimper as you reached your orgasm. You shred a tear when you realize how your own body betrays you. 

He withdraws his fingers as he continues to suck your neck while his hands are circling to your waist down to your hips and grinding his body on you. He then pulls himself to take off the pants that he’s wearing as your body starts to tremble.

You stare at his movements as he pulls down his pants and you gasp when he pulls it down, completely exposing dick. 

His huge, holy shit.

He strokes it and it arouses you even more. You hate yourself right now more than you hate him because you can’t believe that you’re craving it. 

“Please Jungkook, don’t.” Your voice quivered with desperate pleading.

“Stop acting that you’re not enjoying it because your body says otherwise.” He scoffs before he kneels in between your body and pumps his dick, gripping it tightly.

“Spread your legs for me, baby girl.” He commands as he parts your legs. Your eyes widen when you feel that he’s rubbing his dick on your folds as your wetness overflows and a moan is released on your lips. 

“That’s right, moan for me.” He said, almost sound like a whimper teasing you even more and it didn’t take long when he slid his dick inside you making your nails buried on his back. 

“Fuck Y/N, you’re so tight!” He moaned as he went deeper. He placed his hand on your back and a pain filled you when he dug deeper. He was sucking your neck as he kept thrusting in and out. You were pulling his hair, as he groaned on every thrust he made. He stops from time to time to suck your nipples and kiss your lips, making you moan continuously. 

"You're taking me so well, fuck. That's right, take me so well."

You’re starting to cry with the unwanted pleasure you feel but Jungkook only kisses your tears away. And with a hard thrust, you’re about to come. Your breath comes out heavily as you keep on whimpering with every thrust he does. Jungkook curses, his thrust becomes harder and you start to tremble.

“Yes baby, cum all over me and show me how much you enjoyed this.” His words almost sound like a whimper and it only motivates you to reach your second orgasm. 

And when you did, you cried louder as he thrust harder and deeper for the last time. 

—

You were lying on his bed without your clothes, while he was beside you, sleeping peacefully as if he hadn't disrespected you an hour ago. His bed was the softest and most comfortable you had ever experienced, its softness enveloping your body in a gentle embrace. However, all you could feel was disgust and anger at what he had done to you.

 You should be running right now but your body froze and you can’t move them even an inch. It happened three times in a row, and you've been begging him to stop, but he doesn't listen, as if he were possessed by a devil. He's already a monster himself, but you didn't anticipate him forcing you to comply. Most especially, you loathe yourself because your body responds to his desires, leading him to believe that you genuinely enjoy what he's doing, but in reality, you're horrified.

The room is dark, and the moon casts its enchanting glow upon it. You're gazing at the full glass window, where the distant city lights flicker in the distance. An emotional numbness envelopes you, leaving you unstable and broken.

You slowly turn towards the person beside you, and as expected, he's asleep. You can't believe how different he appears when he's sleeping, nothing like the person you know. Instead, he resembles a man who wouldn't harm a soul when his eyes are closed. However, the burning anger you feel hasn't subsided. You can never forget what he has done to you. 

The anger surged within you and you wanted to lash out, to make him feel the same pain he has caused you. You clenched your fist and the thought of killing him gnawed at the edges of your sanity. 

You looked around to find something to protect yourself from him. Slowly, you raised yourself from lying down, careful not to make any movements that might wake him up. With trembling hands, you reach your dress from the floor and put it on before scanning the room.

You've been here for quite some time, but this is the first occasion you've had to observe his entire room. As expected, his room is quite spacious, yet you can't discern the color of the walls as darkness covers the entire space. Your eyes catch a glimpse of a chest of drawers in the corner of the room, and above it, there are photographs adorning the wall. As you take a step closer, your heart rate quickens upon seeing the photos that are affixed to the wall.

The room might be dark but it’s evident that the polaroid photos on the wall are you. There are a lot of photos of you and they are a mix of a photo from your social media accounts and a photo that he took without you noticing it. 

He’s been stalking you for a quite long time already. 

A memory comes back when you’ve felt that someone is looking at you or when you’ve felt like he’s around and you brush it all away believing that you were wrong but it all makes sense because he’s been stalking you and you don’t have any idea of it. 

Your trembling hands worsened as your jaw clenched, turning around with your eyes glared at his sleeping figure.

Your anger consumes you, and with every fiber of your being, a raw, primal fury pulses, urging you to harm him. As your rage intensifies, a dark abyss opens in your mind, and your thoughts race. You take a step toward the bed where he's lying down as your heart thunders in your chest.

‘You fucking monster.’

Even if there isn’t enough light, you still manage to look around to find something. You returned to the chest drawer opening it and you gasped as you saw more photos inside. You didn’t try to look at them one by one focusing on finding something.

‘I will fucking kill you’

From the drawer, you walked around and opened every cabinet inside his room to find something you’re looking for and when you did, your body suddenly froze. 

A gun.

With your heavy breaths and trembling hand, you took it out from the drawer and took a moment to stare at it. 

But before you’ve processed everything, you heard a voice speak.

“My little Y/N, what do you think you’re doing?” 

You immediately stood up, turned around, and saw Jungkook standing 7 feet away from you. The room was so dark that you couldn't see his face, but you could make out his silhouette. He was wearing pants but nothing on top.

You pointed the gun at him but he only laughed it out. Your entire body froze as you pointed the gun firmly on him and your heartbeat echoed loudly on your ears. Your breath came short, as if your lungs were struggling to keep up with your racing thoughts.

He walked slowly toward the bedside table and switched on the lamp, causing the room to fill with a warm glow. It wasn't very bright, but it was enough for both of you to see each other.

He grins as he sees that you stepped back, holding the gun firmer when he took a step towards you. 

You’re shaking so bad but you can’t hold your guards down because anything can happen in just a matter of seconds. 

“What, you’re gonna shoot me after I satisfy you?” He said with a grin on his lips. 

“I’m going to kill you.” Your voice is low but every word you say is sharp enough to show that you’re serious but he only scoffed at your words.

“Really, you’re going to do that?” His voice was seductive, provoking you even more. 

You try to find any signs of fear on his face but you find nothing. Instead, it only worsens your emotions. You weren’t sure if the gun that you’re holding is loaded and you only pray that it does. 

It’s your first time holding a gun and you don't have any idea of how to use it but your life is in danger and you have to act accordingly. 

You cocked the gun and pointed it out at him once again. 

“Do you even know how to use that?” He pouted as if he cares but it was full of mockery and sarcasm. 

“Don’t come near me.” You whispered as you held the gun firmly.

“Come on Y/N, don’t embarrass yourself.” He took a step back and sat at the edge of the bed, while his eyes were on you. “We both know that you aren't capable of doing that. Didn’t I satisfy you enough?” 

“Shut up.”

“As far as I remember, you love it so much when I eat you out. Did I think that wrong?” He rested his hand on the mattress behind him. “I love every reaction that you make when you feel so good. I love it when you dig your nails on my skin because you can’t contain the stimulation. And by how you feel so weak with my touch and kiss–

“Shut the fuck up!”

Your heart raced, your body trembled and a cold sweat broke out on your forehead. your thoughts worsen into chaos and an overwhelming dread washed over you. You can’t take the words he said. You just wanted him to shut up.

He stares at you with so much intensity, like he can see through your soul. “You should’ve checked if the gun was loaded, babe.” He commented shifting his gaze to the gun you’re holding. 

You shook your head as you pressed your lips firmly. “You monster. I’m going to fucking kill you.”

“Then kill me,” He spoke in his low voice. “Shoot me, Y/N.” He slowly stands up and walks towards you, making you step backwards. You panicked even more but you tried your best to stay still and point the gun towards him. 

“Show me how brave you are, Dr. Y/N.” Your back bumps into the cabinet behind you when there is no more space for you to step back as you were shaking so badly and you can no longer hold your tears. He pressed his chest on the muzzle of the gun while looking at you with so much intensity. 

In the blink of an eye, he firmly grabs your arm, attempting to wrest the gun from your grip, but you hold it even more tightly. You push him using your elbow, but he chokes you, and you tremble in pain. He's strong, but your determination is unwavering, and you won't lose to him this time.

You step forcefully onto his right foot, and when he shows his weakness, you swiftly break free from his grasp. However, he manages to trip you, causing you to fall and drop the gun.

You immediately crawl to get the gun but he pulled your leg away from it. 

“You can never escape me, Y/N!” He spoke as his hands circled around your neck. 

Your eyes were starting to blur, preventing you from seeing anything for a few moments. A sense of helplessness washed over you until your eyes caught the gun a few inches away from you. He was focused on choking you to death while you’re focused on reaching the gun. Desperation clouded your thoughts, urging you to stay stronger and when you finally reached the gun, you immediately pulled the trigger in his direction. 

You stood up when he released you, as a searing pain tore through his body upon being struck by the bullet, leaving him gasping for breath. You held the gun firmly while he endured the pain in his rib that had been hit by a bullet.

You cocked the gun one more time and pointed at him. 

You panted heavily as a panic gripped you, the inability to catch your breath adding to the rising sense of fear. He clenched his jaw, forcing himself not to let a sound escape his lips. 

He pressed his hand on his rib, looking at you with the same eyes that you despise so much. Despite being shot, he can still manage to look at you with mockery. 

"Do you believe that after what you've done, you have already… won?" He smirks as he slowly falls on the ground, enduring his physical pain. “I was in your position months ago. Holding a… gun as I shoot my mother. How ironic that the person… who tried to heal me was also the person… who would try to kill me.” He felt an agonizing, relentless throbbing at the site of the gunshot trying to ease the pain. He tried to stand up before he continued. “You’ve said a lot of times that my actions are… bad but look at you right now… Doing the same… thing.” 

“We’re not the same!” You shouted, holding the gun with your two hands. “You ruin my life, you monster!” You felt a seething rage, a burning intensity that threatened to overtake you. 

He only smirks at your response. “Really? Because last time I checked… I shoot my mother for being the monster that she is.” 

“Don’t you dare compare yourself to me!” Your fingers were trembling, itching to pull the trigger. 

“You might keep on denying it but we both know the truth.” Even in his situation, he can still play with a sinister smile on his lips. 

“You’re fucking wrong—

“Come on, Y/N! Look at you!” His eyes blazed with fiery, smirking at you as he cut you off. “You’re just like me! We’re really meant to be!” You are consumed by fury, your thoughts a turbulent storm of anger as his sinister laugh triggers you even more. Your heart pounded in your chest, tears streaming down your cheek and without you noticing it, you’re shooting him continuously.

“Fuck you! Motherfucker!” 

You continue to curse and pull the trigger even though he's already lying on the ground. Your anger blinds you to the point where you can no longer process your actions.

“I’m not like you! I’m fucking not like you!” You screamed along with every shot you made. Your heart pounded on your chest, as your words dripped with outrage. The only time you stop is when the gun is out of bullets. 

The room was surrounded by blood as you observed his lifeless body lying on the ground. You couldn't recall how many times you had shot him, but judging by the considerable amount of blood scattered about, it was evident that you had shot him numerous times.

Your vision swam before you, blurring the edges of reality as the world around you seemed to spin. You glance at the gun you’re holding and you immediately drop it off. Your whole body trembled uncontrollably, making you collapse on the floor. 

Blood. There’s a lot of blood.

The surroundings fell into an eerie silence and a chill ran down your spine. You're suddenly suffocated by fear as you crawl backward.

He’s dead. I killed him.

The only thing that you hear is the ticking sound of the clock and nothing else. You slowly look around but the only thing you see is blood. 

“But look at you right now, doing the same thing.”

“You’re just like me! We’re really meant to be!”

You covered your ears as you heard him. He was dead but you can still hear his sinister voice. 

“You can never escape me, Y/N!”

“STOP!”

—

The horizon blazed with a rich, golden hue as the sun's first rays pierced the darkness. Birds whistled as the day began. The air, now filled with the promise of warmth and life and with each passing moment, the sky emerged from its darkness.

Yet the horror you’ve made is still there. 

You’re under the glass window, watching the world to start its day. The room is still covered in blood–your body is still covered in blood. The sun has risen yet you wanted to stay in the dark. You don’t know what to do anymore. 

You suddenly heard the ringtone of your phone, making you feel more vulnerable. You covered your ears to prevent yourself from hearing it yet the sound seems to hunt you. 

After the call dies, you thought that it won’t ring again but before you can even have a peace of mind, it rang once again. 

Your legs tremble when you stand up. You do your best not to look at the corpse laying on the ground as you walk out of the room. 

His living room is exactly how it looked the last time you saw it. You look around to see any living thing but you sense nothing. Your phone is still ringing when you spot it on the top of the dining table where you ate last night. 

Where he forced you to drink a wine that made you weak. 

Tears welled up in your eyes when you saw the caller’s ID. 

It was your best friend.

It was Taehyung. 

“Thank god you answered! Where the hell are you?! I’ve been calling you since last night but you aren’t answering! You’re gonna kill me for worrying to you!”

Hearing his voice broke you down. Your tears flowed continuously as an uncontrollable emotion poured out on you. 

“Y/N, what happened? Why are you crying?” A deep concern is evident in his voice. 

You were shaking, crying with broken sobs as you covered your mouth in an attempt to calm down.

“Y/N! Speak up! What’s wrong?!”

“Tae… Please help me.” You attempt to speak. 

“Where are you? I’m going there.”

“Taehyung.”

“Y/N, what happened?”

“I made a grave sin.” 

“What?”

Your wailing sobs echoed through the whole area as you fell on your knees. He keeps asking what happened but you’re having a hard time admitting it. 

“Y/N, how am I going to help you if you can’t tell me?”

After a few moments, you started to calm down. Your sobs gradually subsided, a quiet hiccup escaped you as you closed your eyes briefly.

“I killed a man.” The words escape your lips and a new set of tears forms on your eyes. 

You never thought that you would resort to killing him. Out of all the things that happened, you wanted to end everything without harming anyone. You’re a well-known psychiatrist who has an advocacy that despite of who you are and what you’ve become, your mental health matters. 

You know yourself well. You know your strengths and weaknesses, and the cause of your happiness and sadness. But that’s what you thought. 

You can’t control your emotions. 

No matter how you try, you will always have a hard time controlling it.

There are a lot of reasons why people act without thinking when they are emotional. According to a study, physiologically, emotions can activate the body's fight-or-flight response. When emotions trigger this response, stress hormones like adrenaline flood the system, preparing the body to respond to perceived threats. This physiological reaction can reduce the ability to think clearly and may lead to impulsive actions.

“Where are you?” After a long pause, Taehyung finally spoke. 

“At Jeon Jungkook’s place. One of my patients.” You respond in a low voice. 

“Message me the exact address and I’ll be right there.”

You weren’t in your right mind when you pulled the trigger. You didn’t like what happened. 

Therefore, you weren’t just like him. 

It was his fault, after all.

-end-

a/n: finally, it's complete! Thank you so much for joining me in writing this JK fic. It's my first time delving into the thriller genre, and I've truly enjoyed the experience. I also hope that you all enjoy reading it as well. Have a great day, everyone!

taglist: @idkjustlovingbts @koohrs @minshookie29 @aajjks @softie00 @exquisite-bands @kingofbodyrolls @floralflowexs @oopscoop @yoonjinhusbands @ash07128 @kookiesbunny @cinnikoi @yluv-damara-13 @hoseoksluv89 @darkuni63 @iloverubberduckiez-blog @fangirl-death-rose @looneybleus

[kakashixhatakesxwhore]

Most to least experienced in bed? Konoha 11 and whoever else you wanna add. Love your work 😩😩

alrighty, i switched this up a bit to avoid strange research, if you wanna see someone else/another group ranking, lmk - i hope this is up to code, and thank you for the request!!

Sex Tier List

Ranked: Konoha 11 (Naruto, Sakura, Shikamaru, Ino, Choji, Kiba, Shino, Hinata, Neji, Lee, Tenten) + Sand Siblings (Kankuro, Temari, Gaara) + Sasuke

Warnings: swearing, x(GN)reader implications, we are talking about sex, uh idk lmk if something makes you uncomfy

Notes: Boruto era for everyone, and, for everyone, their Bortuo era! this request had me fucked up lowk because, canonically, these mfs got zero action without rings - so we're putting an enjoyment spin on it, worst to best, in a modern-ish au. as in, who you would have to guide, vs, who could rock your world, five times over, in one night.

Masterlist💿

Tier 3 - Passable🪙

5. Hinata

I'm not even sorry. She deffo just lies there. Never gets on top. You have to ask for anything and everything, and not even in a sexy, teasing way, more in a 'I don't want to feel like I'm fucking a wooden board' way.

4. Kiba

May God love him because this man is certainly a selfish lover. That's not to say he isn't good - he's great at getting himself off, his brain just kinda shuts off otherwise. If you wanna cum, the onus is on you, because he's fuck-drunk within seconds of you touching him.

3. Kankuro

He's trying, okay?? It's just really fucking hard to keep you in mind when you just feel so fucking good. Kankuro's just inconsistent - that's the main issue. He'll try a million different positions in one session and is always unintentionally edging you.

2. Lee

Now, our darling, Rock Lee, is trying his best, honestly and truly. However, he doesn't know anything about anything, and you have to guide him every now and again. He's got the enthusiasm down, he's just not very good at translating it into pure sexual energy on the fly.

1. Gaara

He's too busy to be good at sex. When he does find the time, y'all get extra down and dirty, but Gaara's still lowkey inexperienced and the irregularity of your encounters doesn't help.

Tier 2 - Good🪩

5. Choji

Bro's got hidden talents, aight? It's a matter of him wanting to utilize them that sets Choji up. Most nights, he's chilling, but on those key few nights, hot damn.

4. Sasuke

I would've put him lower but y'all would've been mad - it's called REALISM. Sasuke would be wayyyyy too busy to put in the work to develop any actual skill in the bedroom, and he would find researching for it so far past disgusting. His good grace would be his natural endowment and prowess, but he's on thin fucking ice.

3. Tenten

Surprisingly stone top vibes, I cannot lie. She deffo gets off on your pleasure, but she's down here because she's kinda bad at first. There would totally be improvement, like obvious and quick improvement, but those first few times were pretty rough.

2. Shino

Baby boy. Sweet boy. Ugh. I love. I wanted him as number one, so I'm not even defending this. Take it up with my lawyer.

1. Naruto

He's not the main character for nothing. Naruto lays pipe, but he can get a bit selfish at times. Never fear though, the second he catches himself, lost in the sauce, another round gets added to his itinerary. He'll be making it up to you tenfold, even if it was just for a minute.

Tier 1 - Fantastic🔮

5. Sakura

With her level of anatomical knowledge, she barely even needs to break a sweat to give you a release. However, she will break a sweat, because she wants to. Just amazing, idk what to tell you.

4. Temari

Got me kickin my feet and twirlin my hair rn - she would be so GODLY in the sack. She's always very present, very attentive, but is so openly expressive in the moment. Temari would have you screaming syllables and seeing colours behind your eyelids.

🥉 Neji

The game my man's got is INSANE. I just know for a goddamn fact that no one dances the horizontal mambo as gracefully as Neji. You're pleased, he's pleased, no one's ever terribly tired or bruised, the limits are clear lines but are never even toed. That's just the reg, too! Special nights would be fucking wild, dude would have wine, and flowers, and candles - he would go the whole nine yards every time.

🥈 Ino

Be still, my beating heart. Christ. Yeah, Ino's got this shit on lock. She's a vers switch, need I say more? (I do, someone request a fic)

🥇 SHIKAMARU

Y'all seen my preferance yet, or nah?

Oh Em Gee - Shikamaru could have you, heels to Jesus, all night longgggg. The stamina, the will, the knowledge, the capability; it's all there, and no one is as apt to put it all together except for Shikamaru. He would go for hours at a time, until he physically couldn't anymore. He would know exactly what makes your timebomb tick, and he would push every button so deliciously. Fuck, he's a tease too. If you two aren't actively in the bedroom, he's trying to get you there.

[usagifuyusummer]

Family Dinner Night!

Congrats Peri(winkle) for finally getting the Godparenting license!!! 🥳🥳🥳 - from your loving parents and godbrother 💖💖💖

More concept art and as usual my insane ramblings below.

I NEED TO GET THE CREATIVE URGES OUT OF MY HEAD!!! It has been bothering with my motivation to finish my gazillions of homeworks lmao. I have so many ideas I need to let out!!! It's suffocating. I hope this will satisfy my creative urges for a while... Or not I will yap about my FOP AU on a separate post (when I'm able).

I can't stop being sad thinking about this family lol. Timmy 😭😭😭

I am not kidding when I say that my head is just filled with so many things that I want to contribute in the FOP fanworks lol. There's a lot I want to do, but so little time...

For now, I've decided to practice my take on the FOP artstyle. I wanted to do something simple as drawing and coloring practice. That's why the coloring this time is flat with no shadings. I think the show doesn't focus on shaded colors too much (except on scenes where there's a heavy implication of day/night, for shock value, etc.).

Just wanted to draw something cute because I haven't been feeling so swell lately. Nothing too poetic or detailed this time.

Other than that, two of the outfits this time is actually inspired by @suki-na-kumo for Peri and an image I found floating around in Twitter/X (sorry I don't remember who shared it) for Timmy's design. Suki-na-kumo's FOP family redesigns are so cool and adorable! I like that they always include flowy attributes in Peri's outfits lol. It makes him look like a pampered brat (which he kinda is seeing how his family coddles him), an otherworldly prince and also a Twink TM (that is unavoidable lol). I kinda want to draw their other FOP redesigns, but I'll just go with Peri's first.

I am not sure where that 18 year old Timmy design is from, but it kinda can be his design for those who theorise him on becoming a lawyer as an adult. There's a lot of instances where Timmy is wearing a suit in the show, but this design is one of my favs due to the hairstyle change. My adult Timmy designs in the future will be influenced from this piece of official art. I wonder if there are more Timmy designs in the wild wild west out there that I haven't seen... It is certainly an interesting find (Teen AJ is also there, and his design also looks cool to me).

Cosmo and Wanda's oufits are something that I cooked up. I don't think the coloring looks good... I just did this on a whim, and for about 13 hours. Damn, I am procrastinating on my work lmao.

Still, the context this time is, that they've had a family dinner to celebrate on Peri's achievement on finally obtaining his godparenting license!!! Good for him!!!

This is an AU if Timmy somehow was able to find a loophole in the "losing your memories of your fairy godparents after you become an adult" rule. Because of that, he continued his life as normal (as Timmy's chaotic life can be), but this time he is able to keep in contact with his fairy family even if they're not contractually obligated to stick together. Timmy does live with the Fairywinkle Cosma's around his college to early work years, but he eventually was able to move out and live on his own at where he works as a lawyer after a while in his adulthood. (His birth parents eventually went on a lifetime vacation without him or just went away for too long that Timmy just lives on his own a lot after he is 18 and above...)

Despite living on his own nowadays (In a New Wish context), Timmy does keep in contact with his fairy family and visits them when he's not busy with his job. Cosmo and Wanda still took a long vacation in this AU, first due to, yeah, Timmy is no easy feat as a godchild lol, and second, they actually want to take their time to raise BOTH of their children (even if Timmy is no longer a child/godchild) and guide them until they're stable adults. Timmy during college years actually only stays with the Fairywinkle Cosma's on holidays, so when Timmy's busy with college, that is when Cosmo and Wanda take their time relaxing lmao.

Sometimes when they really want to have some time alone or when Peri wants to see his bro, they will send Peri to Timmy's college for a day or more. Timmy babysits Peri so much during his college years lol. They both had fun though! With a lot of Peri newfound nuclear fairy power shenanigans at Timmy's college lmao. Studying law and taking the bar exam has never been more chaotic with babysitting a nuclear powered fairy child.

There's a lot more on this AU that I've been thinking, but I'll stop here for now. I need to gather my AU ideas in one post sometime later.

Also, Peri and Timmy are both adults here, Peri's around his 20's here and Timmy is on his early 30's I think. Cosmo, Wanda, and Peri are in their human disguises here, because they want to learn more about human culture (A New Wish context) while also having the desire to be more in Timmy's life.

I headcannon Timmy to be kinda short in his adulthood. This is also a nod to that episode when his fairy family used imperfect human disguises, even Poof/Peri was taller than Timmy in his human baby disguise lol. And also hey, wearing braces during his teen years paid off! (his big teeth are visible only when he opens his mouth lol)

As usual, here's some concept art and a png lineart pic if you want to use it to color it better than I did lmao. (that was a long yapping session... thanks for reading)

[caustinen]

clegan drabble 💞📑⚖️

— secret relationship / lawyer au

Gale is deep in thought, staring at the papers in his hand with a slight frown. He doesn’t look up when someone knocks on his open office door — mainly because he can tell it’s Bucky without having to check. It’s evident by — well, everything, the rhythm of his steps when they approached, the way the air smells of smugness and his favorite cologne, and the firmness in which he knocked.

Fair enough, the footsteps continue further without waiting for invitation. Gale puffs out a breath, gesturing with his occupied hands, still not looking up. ”I know we’re supposed to be having dinner right now but I just got the new evidence on the Hausmann case this afternoon and- Mpfh!”

He’s very rudely interrupted by a pair of insistent lips pressing to his. Bucky isn’t bothered by him not being ready for it in the slightest, just pulls him close by the waist — which is not tiny by the way, no matter what Bucky keeps insisting every time he grabs it in bed — and bites into the lush lips with his own with a passion that suggests it would’ve been quite a while longer than a couple of hours since he last did it.

Gale surrenders to the antics like it was a natural disaster — why fight what is inevitable? — but when John snatches the papers from his hands and throws them carelessly to the table behind himself Gale makes a protesting sound and presses his newly freed hands to his chest in mild protest.

”John,” he whines and the smirk on Bucky’s face makes him want to punch him almost as much as he wants to kiss is again, ”what are you-” ”The damn new copying machine jammed again, and I figured the only way I wouldn’t kick it was if I could jam my tongue to the back of your throat in turn.”

Gale looks at him blankly. ”That’s. Not-” ”I would of course prefer to destroy it by having you over it so hard that they’d have to buy a new one. We could really help the whole office with one easy, selfless act, doll.”

Gale scoffs but he knows Bucky can tell he’s fighting a smile. The second kiss is more gentle but still quite too intense for a work environment. Bucky has one hand around Gale’s waist and the other on his cheek, Gale’s are resting lazily on his hips as they indulge in each other, breathe quietly in their lovers lips and enjoy the forbidden bliss of doing this at work — it feels more meaningful than it is, really, like they’re not only breaking the rules of their office but also the deeper system it is embedded to; pleasure at work fights with the ideals of capitalism themselves, Gale would probably muse if he wasn’t so damn busy not thinking about anything but how lovely it is to kiss someone you love. He pushes John gently towards the table behind him and exhales as he bites his lowelip when John pulls him against his spread legs.

He needs to catch his breath though, and that’s when he realizes they are not even as thinly veiled as he would have hoped. ”You left the door open,” he says, trying to push him farther so the pose wouldn’t be so damning, ”my secretary-” ”I sent him away,” John says, uninterested, and tries to pull Gale closer by his tie. The younger doesn’t budge, though, but rather lifts a hand to his own lips and then looks at the fingers as if he could from there see how swollen, how incriminating, the scene they make looks.

”Anyone could walk in.” John groans and bites the air between them, running his hands down Gale’s sides. ”Don’t get me more excited than I already am, damn, sweetheart.” ”Oh for fuck’s sake-”

Bucky kisses him again to silence him, and despite a weak fight Gale allows it well enough. After, when Bucky pulls away, he takes Gale’s face between his palms and makes him look into his eyes.

”Baby. Everyone else left like an hour ago. It’s 8pm. You work too much. Time to call it a night.”

Gale stares at him, blinking a couple of times before slowly checking his watch and realizing John is not joking. He really has been at the office for more than 13 hours. Oops.

”I…” ”Save it, cowboy,” Bucky says with the easiness that Gale so loves about him as he stands up straight and takes Gale’s jacket from the chair. ”I love how much you care. I also love that I get to be the one who tells you when you’re an idiot workaholic and need to go home for a bit so you can be an idiot workaholic tomorrow too.” Gale sighs dramatically but does put on the coat Bucky is holding up for him.

”Well,” he says sheepishly as Bucky drags him out of the office by the hand and stops to lock the door, ”I can’t cook anything nice to apologize at home but maybe I can think of something else to reward such patience for my crime of attempting to serve justice.”

Bucky chukles, leaning up from the lock and and taking Gale’s hand to his. ”That copying machine gets to live one more day then,” he says and kisses Gale’s knuckles. Gale tries to swat him but he dodges. They’re both giggling and Gale knows he must be too tired when he’s this careless at the office but to be fair it is late and everyone truly is home. He dares one more kiss when they wait for the elevator.

People at their office don’t need to know about his personal life. They don’t need to know he’s fucking his boss. They don’t need to know that it’s been going on for years but it wasn’t until yesterday when Bucky had taken him into a fancy restaurant and told him he loves him and wants to be more than friends who have sex sometimes (quite frequently lately) (and exclusively) but still, he wants to be even more than that. They don’t need to know Gale’s heart had bursted in the moment when his deepest, most hidden dream had come true, and butterflies don’t even begin to explain the sensations those words set in motion. They don’t need to know he and Bucky made love all night, that he fell asleep in Bucky’s bed, and that he plans on doing that again tonight.

He looks at Bucky and feels a fondness that’s almost like pain as it stretches over the places in him that used to be longing and achiching. He looks down shyly before raising his eyes again, kissing Bucky’s knuckles in turn.

”My place or yours?”

[ysmtttty]

Red Ferrari

Chapter 13

Summary: Azris AU, where Azriel is a mechanic and has his own service station. One day, Eris comes there because something is wrong with his car

AO3 link Chapter 12 Chapter 14

Eris woke up in the morning due to the light filtering through the bright curtains, the pleasant absence of a headache, and the unpleasantly familiar ringtone of his phone. At the same time, Azriel opened his eyes, grumbled that Eris was an idiot for not putting his phone on silent, and reached over to hang up the call before Eris could figure out who was calling.

"For God's sake, it's Sunday. Whoever is calling this early deserves the death penalty," Azriel muttered, tightening his arms around Eris' waist and pulling him closer, burying his nose in Eris' neck. "Go back to sleep."

Eris stifled a laugh and obeyed the command, closing his eyes again and enjoying the warmth beside him. He liked waking up here—even if it wasn't the most comfortable bed he had ever slept in and there was always a risk of getting bedbugs, despite whatever Azriel claimed about their absence. Being next to Azriel, with no rush to go anywhere, and not fearing that someone might break into the apartment was enough for him.

However, his phone rang again, breaking the comfortable morning idyll for the second time. Azriel groaned and bit Eris' shoulder in a small act of revenge for disrupting not just his own sleep but Azriel's as well.

"You're going to need to buy another phone because if it rings again, I'm breaking this one," Azriel grumbled as Eris declined the call. But not even a minute passed before the persistent caller tried again.

"Sorry," Eris said apologetically, thinking it might be necessary to answer the call. In his situation, it could be anyone for any reason.

Azriel rolled his eyes, reluctantly pulling away to give the illusion of privacy. Despite his sleepiness, he watched with interest as Eris' expression turned serious. The soft half-smile from their cuddling morphed into a frown and coldness as he answered the call, responding with short "yes," "no," and "I'll handle it."

Whoever was on the other end of the line at eight in the morning on a weekend, was making Eris tense. Azriel noticed the way his shoulders stiffened, the crease that appeared between his brows, and the way his nails absentmindedly scratched the skin of his hand.

"I understand, I'll be there as soon as I can," Eris ended the conversation, and Azriel was not happy to hear that.

After hanging up and practically throwing his phone onto the bedside table, Eris buried his face in his hands and groaned.

"Who was that?" Azriel asked, pulling his hands away from his face and placing his own palm against Eris' cheek.

"The police," Eris grumbled with annoyance, leaning into Azriel's hand. "Morrigan's father got arrested last night. And since he used me as his lawyer during my marriage to her, he's demanding me as his attorney now as well."

Azriel frowned immediately, not expecting that answer. Sure, he had anticipated some sort of work-related issue—maybe a fire at the office, a troublesome client needing help, or something business-related. Azriel had planned to persuade Eris to leave it until Monday, as the world wouldn't end if Eris Vanserra took a day off to truly rest.

Well, it seemed that apparently it would. Damn rich lawyers and their drama.

"And you can't refuse?"

"He's a client of my firm," Eris sighed in explanation. "I can't refuse without a valid reason. It would cause unpleasant rumors about unreliability."

Azriel reached over and bit his shoulder again, to which Eris only laughed softly, running his hand through Azriel's hair and smiling weakly.

"I'm sure it's just some casino debt issue or something like that. It'll be settled with bail and a few negotiations," Eris reassured, trying to convince himself of that. "I don't think it'll take long."

"So, does that mean I'll still see you today?" Azriel smirked lazily as Eris leaned in to kiss him.

"I plan to exploit your hospitality until you kick me out of your apartment, so yes, you'll still see me," Eris smirked back against his lips.

Then he hurried to get dressed, while Azriel slowly got up to make coffee since his wonderfully busy lawyer boyfriend had to work on a Sunday.

"There's a steamer in the closet," Azriel called from the kitchen, watching as Eris tried to smooth out his shirt and make it look presentable. Eris nodded in thanks and went to the closet, looking for the steamer.

As he figured out how the miracle gadget worked – Azriel had a feeling Eris didn't often iron his own clothes – Azriel whipped up a quick breakfast, knowing this idiot likely wouldn't grab food on the way.

While eggs fried on the stove, Azriel walked around the kitchen, doing most routine things leisurely, and feeling Eris approach and kiss him on the neck. "I can't imagine how I lived before you," Eris joked into his ear.

"You'd walk around in wrinkled shirts with terrible eating habits," Azriel remarked, turning off the stove and facing him.

"I never wear wrinkled shirts," Eris scoffed, tying his tie and deliberately adjusting his collar.

"Oh yeah, you'd just order a new, ironed shirt instead of using the steamer."

"Unfortunately, your home is outside the delivery range of my atelier."

Azriel laughed, plating the eggs. After a quick breakfast and a kiss, Eris left, saying he'd call later when he figured out how long the mess with Keir would take.

***

Eris hated police stations. Mostly because of how many times he had to visit them for work. Even more so because, in his hometown, his last name was often recognized before he even arrived, and the officers would look at him with suspicion and disdain.

Not that he cared what some uniformed idiots thought of him, people who couldn't do their jobs without wasting time.

Ignoring the protests of a few uniformed idiots, he walked straight to the investigator’s office, who happened to be a good acquaintance from their frequent encounters under similar circumstances. The investigator greeted him with only a sullen look.

"That bad, huh?" Eris sighed, closing the door behind him and giving Tamlin a once-over.

"Don't even ask for bail," Tamlin cut him off immediately in an unfriendly tone. "He's being charged with murder, and the evidence against him is overwhelming. There's no way you're getting him off."

Eris resisted the urge to roll his eyes. How many times had he heard that phrase, and how many times had he proven otherwise? Still, that didn't mean he intended to try too hard in Keir's case. In fact, he suspected it all coincidentally aligned with things his father had said and his sudden appearance in town.

"With all due respect, it's not your decision whether to grant bail," Eris stated firmly, not letting the condescending attitude toward his skills slide. "The court will decide that, not you. And in the event that my client and I decide to file a bail request, I strongly advise you not to obstruct it. Otherwise, I'm sure you know what will happen. Now," he patted his briefcase, "I'd like to see the case files. I have limited time, and I'd prefer to spend it speaking with my client."

Tamlin’s eyes flashed with anger. Eris met his gaze indifferently, understanding that the man had every reason to hinder his investigation. Keir was a bloated bastard, known by every rat in the alley to be involved in shady business. A man who had been under investigation for years, if not decades, but even then, no one had been able to dig up enough to go to court. The clean-up was too effective. Or the bribes. Probably both.

Eris could only sympathize for three seconds because, with all due respect to Tamlin and his “noble” duty to put criminals behind bars, right now, his own ass was on the line. If Eris had learned anything from years in law, it was that he wasn't defending justice—he was defending himself and getting paid for it.

Considering the stakes were higher than just simple money in this case, Eris wasn't about to dive into who was right or wrong, guilty or innocent.

Tamlin silently pulled a thin gray folder from his top drawer and tossed it to Eris, nearly hitting him in the face. Eris held back, though he could have said plenty in response to the unmistakable gesture—he only smirked crookedly and, flipping through the documents, sarcastically muttered, "Thanks."

All he needed was for the case not to fall into Thesan's hands when it went to court. That would be the real disaster because Eris had learned over the years that Thesan would scrutinize every letter in the documents, and if Keir was indeed guilty and foolish enough to get caught, getting him off would be impossible.

After reviewing the case files and finishing the coffee he ordered at the café across the street, Eris returned to the station. This time, he intended to speak with Keir himself.

"Is he here?" Eris asked the officer, naming Keir and identifying himself as his lawyer. The officer just looked at the computer, taking far too long to type a name that wasn't that long, then poked at it some more before staring dumbly at the screen.

"Yes," the officer eventually nodded. Although Eris had asked because he needed the officer to escort him to Keir.

Eris expectantly looked at the uniformed idiot, who slowly blinked, irritatingly taking a sip from his mug. Beginning to simmer, Eris forced himself to take a deep breath and remind himself that he would be able to leave soon.

“So, will you let me speak to my client?” Eris asked, raising an eyebrow, impatiently drumming his fingers on the edge of the table.

The idiot, as if he had just realized what was being asked of him, suddenly became flustered and nodded, finally getting up from his seat.

“Follow me,” he muttered, and Eris followed him.

They entered the interrogation room, where Eris glanced at Keir, sitting at the table and handcuffed to it. He looked exhausted; the police clearly hadn't wasted time and had been trying to question him for hours. Keir looked as irritated as ever.

Not surprising, though, Eris thought. He probably wouldn’t enjoy spending his Sunday morning in a police station either, asking for help from someone he had recently tried to intimidate.

When the idiot finally left the room, giving them some privacy, Eris pulled out the free chair and took a seat. Seeing Keir in prison clothes definitely brought him some satisfaction, along with a strange amusement at the sight.

“Well?” Eris crossed his arms and looked expectantly at Keir, who only huffed in irritation. “I hope you haven’t confessed to anything,” Eris said condescendingly, spreading some papers from his briefcase.

“Do I look like an idiot?” Keir almost growled, glaring at him with even more frustration. Eris met his gaze indifferently.

“What makes you think I’ll take on this case?” he asked instead, lifting one of the documents. “I don’t take on doomed cases. And from what I see…” He deliberately glanced at one of the security camera photos. “This case is already lost.”

“Beron’s son, undefeated in any case, and here you are telling me there’s nothing you can do?” Keir smirked. “Don’t you think your father will be quickly disappointed?”

Eris chuckled lightly, finding it amusing that Keir actually believed his father’s approval was something he sought. Not in this life, and probably not in any other. Beron was fatefully born to be a terrible father, whose opinion Eris only considered when it threatened physical harm or serious risks that couldn’t be ignored.

But to take into account the approval or disapproval of that old bastard? God forbid.

“I’m innocent,” Keir declared confidently, and Eris just rolled his eyes. How many times had he heard that phrase in his practice?

“All my clients are innocent,” he noted dryly. “Do you have an alibi?”

Keir opened his mouth and then closed it, clearly stopping himself from saying something. “No. I don’t.”

Eris narrowed his eyes, studying him, and then scoffed. “If I do decide to become your lawyer, you must tell me only the truth. Otherwise, I won’t be able to defend you.”

“The truth is,” Keir leaned in, resting his elbows on the table and lowering his voice in an intense tone, “I’m innocent. I didn’t do what these pigs accuse me of, whether I have an alibi or not. And I think you’ll take my case,” he continued after a pause, leaning back in his chair. “Because if you don’t, the consequences might not be to your liking.”

“You’re not in a position to threaten me,” Eris cut in sharply without batting an eye. Keir’s words didn’t scare him, they only made him angrier.

“Actually, you’re not in a position to refuse me,” Keir smirked smugly, trying to gesture with his hands to match his words, but the handcuffs restrained him, and Eris almost smiled. “Ask your father in a few days why Morrigan was granted the honor of becoming part of the Vanserra family.”

There it was. The hint of blackmail Eris had been waiting for. Confirmation of his father’s words, which he hadn’t wanted to fully believe, but here Keir was, behaving exactly as Beron had said he would if those words were true.

“Morrigan will no longer be part of the Vanserra family in a week,” Eris sneered without a hint of humor. Keir clearly didn’t appreciate his words, feeling unsatisfied that his threats were once again ignored. “And I have no doubt that without my intervention, in a week, you’ll have neither influence nor money. I personally doubt those things will matter much in prison. But by pulling the right strings, who knows where you’ll end up, right? Maybe even in the north.”

Eris grinned as Keir jerked forward in anger at his audacity. Of course, few people liked it when someone dug through their dirty laundry and found details they’d rather no one knew. Too bad for Keir that Eris wasn’t lazy when it came to sending his people to dig up dirt on those who dared cross him.

“If I’m not mistaken, most of your enemies are in the northern prison, right?” Eris smiled coldly. “A few drug lords you framed, maybe even entire cartels. I think they’ll be thrilled to see a familiar face.”

“You’re definitely your father’s son,” Keir muttered, and Eris laughed humorlessly.

“One day, you’ll get tired of playing the ‘your father’ card against me,” Eris remarked

Keir narrowed his eyes as if seeing Eris from a new angle. He probably hadn’t expected Eris to come this prepared. However, something told Eris that Keir hadn’t expected to be in this situation at all. There was something about his claims of innocence that Eris, despite himself, believed.

“Your terms?” Keir demanded reluctantly.

Eris tilted his head. “Simple. We sign a contract, and I help reduce the sentence.”

Keir, simmering with frustration, held back another retort. “I don’t need a reduced sentence. I need my rightful acquittal for a crime I didn’t commit.”

“All the evidence is against you. The jury won’t be pleased with your reputation, and even a judge on your payroll won’t be able to help,” Eris said firmly, in a matter-of-fact tone.

He laid out the papers on the table, and Keir stared at them, clearly seeing them for the umpteenth time, judging by the fury with which he glared at the photo of a shadowy figure captured by security cameras leaving the hotel where the victim was killed.

“The victim was a politician and businessman with whom you reportedly had a falling-out over territory disputes. He was killed yesterday at 9 PM in his hotel room. The staff testifies they saw you, and the surveillance footage confirms it.”

Keir grimaced, his eyes sweeping over all the documents with disgust.

“And you think I’m stupid enough to do it myself?” he scoffed indignantly. Eris understood, too, that people like Keir usually handled such matters quietly and indirectly. However, karma did exist, and it often caught up with such people unexpectedly. Even if with the help of people like Beron.

“I think you’re in a pathetic situation,” Eris said. “One I can pull you out of if we sign a contract on my terms. And they will include more than just payment for my hard work.”

“Demanding compensation for physical damage, boy?” Keir sneered condescendingly.

“I’ll demand the destruction of any compromising materials your family has against mine. All of it, including all backup copies. If you violate our agreement, you’ll be liable for an exorbitant fine. And we’re talking millions, which, from what I’ve heard, don’t stay long in your pockets with the speed at which you visit casinos.”

Another wave of anger crossed Keir’s face, which Eris ignored once again. “This includes compromising material held by all your family members against anyone from the Vanserra family.”

“Has your wife got something on you?” Keir guessed.

“Not surprised to find that rottenness runs in the family,” Eris shrugged. “Only on those terms will I help you. If you can’t handle things by the time the trial starts, you can rely on a public defender.”

Keir wasn’t foolish enough to believe he could find a better lawyer, or even a good one, who would be willing to represent his interests in court, given how much evidence was stacked against him. Any sensible person in this situation would say he was on his own, no matter how much money Keir offered. Ruining one’s career with such a case would appeal only to the foolish or greedy.

Eris didn’t entirely believe that a contract would truly prevent Keir from spreading compromising information, which would be difficult to control, especially since Beron would never tell him what kind of dirt Keir had. However, Eris noticed just how much Keir panicked when he mentioned prison placement. A few more well-placed threats, and in his panic, Keir would likely agree to anything Eris asked.

After concluding the conversation, Eris left the police station. He would now have to help Keir, at least by preparing a base of arguments on why the police evidence was insufficient for a conviction—something difficult, but not impossible.

***

When Eris left, Azriel remained in the apartment, unsure of what to do with himself. On any other day, he might have agreed to cover Cassian's Sunday shift, knowing full well how much he hated working on weekends, especially early in the morning. But today wasn’t the day. And… to be honest, Azriel doubted such days would come often anymore.

It wasn’t just because today he wanted to spend time with Eris, despite the fact that even on Sundays, that idiot had to work and had already run off somewhere. The problem lay more in the fact that he no longer wanted to linger at the workshop any longer than necessary.

If Azriel used to practically live for his work, in a good way, not as a workaholic, enjoying time with his best friends there and finding some peace among the familiar and well-mastered mechanisms, he no longer felt the same calm. Now, he wanted to finish his shift early and leave as soon as possible.

Azriel suspected Rhysand was to blame. More precisely, their strained relationship. It had been more than three weeks since he had, supposedly, “forgiven” Rhysand. Yet during this entire period, they hadn’t gathered the three of them together like they used to. Cassian had invited them multiple times, but either Rhysand had urgent matters to attend to, or Azriel himself came up with excuses why he couldn’t make it.

Sometimes these excuses were true, like when Eris told him they were going to a closed car exhibition, and turning that down would have been very, very stupid. But other times, he made them up because…

Honestly, he still didn’t fully understand why. Some sudden sense of discomfort? That was possible.

Despite Rhysand’s attempts to smooth over their conflict, Azriel still felt the rift between them. Every attempt from his best friend to rebuild the bridge between them ended with Azriel simply cutting the ties on his end.

Azriel thought that everything between them would improve. In time. That things would return to the way they used to be, and they’d once again sit at Rhysand’s house, watching sports, laughing at Cassian when he overreacted to certain moments. Or they’d once again discuss their complicated love lives—mostly it was just Azriel teasing the other two because they were such losers in that department, and he sometimes wondered how the Archeron sisters even put up with them.

But the more time passed, the more often Azriel came to the realization that maybe things would never be the same again.

Maybe, at that moment, Rhysand had broken something between them, causing irreparable damage that couldn’t be fixed with simple apologies and a few work-related perks.

That was probably why Azriel ignored his messages more often than usual, taking hours to respond because he needed time to gather the strength to reply at all. And that’s also why he declined their usual hangouts. That’s also why he no longer stayed longer than necessary at the workshop when his and Rhysand’s shifts overlapped.

And yet… there was something sharp tugging at his chest with the realization that over a decade of friendship had ended just like that.

Azriel spent some time in the kitchen, trying to figure out lunch, slightly hoping that Eris would return by lunchtime and finish all his business as early as possible. Aside from the leftover pasta from yesterday, which, despite his love for Eris, didn’t taste the best, there wasn’t anything edible in the fridge.

After improvising with the ingredients and making something like a stew, Azriel went out to the store, since he’d run out of sunflower oil and a few other small things he’d been putting off buying later. And that merciless "later" had finally come.

The weather outside was nasty and cold, with slush on the roads—he hadn’t even heard it rain during the night—clouds overhead adding unnecessary gloom to the day, and a wind that pierced through to the bone despite the jacket he had on. Miserable, in one word.

Azriel was almost at the store when his gaze fell on a figure in the crowd. A figure with cold eyes, staring directly at him, with hair black as night. A figure too familiar, someone Azriel never wanted to see again. A figure of death.

But as he pushed through the crowd, intent on catching the cursed figure, the person had already vanished. It must have been his imagination. It had to be. They couldn’t be here…

Looking around and not seeing anyone even remotely resembling the figure, Azriel sighed in relief. He must have imagined it. Maybe his eyesight was getting worse with age, and he was due for a visit to the ophthalmologist and perhaps even needed glasses.

Still, as he walked home, the unsettling feeling from what he’d seen lingered. A certain tension, a sense of being watched. Azriel brushed off the feeling as he entered the building and then the shower, telling himself they were too far away for the figure to be real.

Closer to lunchtime, Eris called.

"Hey," and judging by the tiredness in his voice, Azriel knew their lunch plans were canceled.

"Hey," Azriel replied. "How’s it going?"

"Terrible," Eris bluntly said. "I’ll be stuck with this case for a while. I’ll be home in the evening, okay?"

"No problem," Azriel answered, carefully hiding the disappointment in his voice. No way he’d burden Eris even more. "Any dinner requests?"

Eris chuckled softly over the phone. "Anything without black pepper."

"Got it. Call when you’re on your way."

Eris responded with a quiet "mhm" and hung up. Azriel sighed, rubbing his eyes and wondering when Eris’s presence in his life had become so indispensable, so important, that now, when he was busy with his own matters, Azriel felt a strange sense of disappointment in his absence.

When his phone rang again, Azriel hoped it was Eris. Just because. Maybe he’d finished his work early.

However, the caller ID showed it was Gwyn, and Azriel picked up, preparing to hear some important gossip about other music groups that Gwyn was too excited about or some rave about a new book—she’d already told her friends about it, but her emotions were still overflowing, and Azriel was a great outlet to vent and recount the entire plot again.

"Yeah?" Azriel smiled as he answered, but the voice that greeted him wasn’t joyful at all.

"Hey, Az," Gwyn said, sounding furious, not in the least bit amused. "I know you’re busy, but can you pick me up from the bar?"

"Something happened?" Azriel frowned, already grabbing his keys and jacket. Gwyn just sniffled.

"No," she snapped. "I’ll explain later. Can you just come, please?"

Azriel promised to be there as soon as possible, and within twenty minutes, he was already standing in the familiar bar’s parking lot, surprised to see Cassian’s car there as well.

Stepping out of his car and meeting his friend, who should have been at work, Azriel frowned even more.

"What’s going on?" he asked seriously, trying not to show his growing concern. Judging by the fact that Cassian wasn’t smiling, things weren’t good.

"No idea," Cassian shrugged, nodding toward the bar’s black back door, which was slightly ajar, letting aggressive female voices spill out. An intense argument was going on inside.

"Nesta asked me to come, so I did, but then she yelled at me to stay out of it."

Azriel wasn’t surprised, but he glanced warily toward the door.

"What the hell, Em?" came Gwyn’s voice—Gwyn, who almost never raised her voice.

"It’s my life, I have the right to make my own decisions," another voice—Azriel guessed it was Emerie’s, though he didn’t know her well enough to be certain.

"Not when it’s a blatantly stupid decision you’ll regret," Nesta’s voice, wound tight with frustration, followed.

Cassian and Azriel exchanged glances, still deciding not to intervene, as stepping inside seemed like a deadly mission, and they both valued their heads staying on their shoulders. However, Azriel at least decided to text Gwyn that he had arrived.

A few minutes later, Gwyn burst out of the building, slamming the metal door so hard that no one would have expected such strength from her. She passed Azriel in silence, getting into the passenger seat of his car.

"I’m heading out," Azriel quietly told Cassian. He just nodded. "Call me if you find out what happened."

"If Nesta doesn’t bite my head off," Cassian joked, but judging by his worried expression, Azriel knew he was more scared for her than of her.

Waving goodbye, Azriel got into the car with Gwyn and silently drove her home. All the while, Gwyn tried discreetly to wipe away the tears that Azriel knew had come from anger. It was a reaction that annoyed her—crying out of frustration. It was uncontrollable and, from what he knew, interfered with her ability to argue effectively.

Without asking anything other than if she wanted to stop somewhere along the way, maybe to get some water or sweets, Azriel drove in silence, trying not to press her.

"Em has a girlfriend," Gwyn suddenly announced, sniffling.

Azriel stayed quiet, giving her the space to talk. Instead, he reached for the car’s control panel and turned the radio on to a low volume.

"She had a girlfriend all this time, and neither Nesta nor I knew anything about it," Gwyn continued with a note of resentment. "For years, Az! She'd been seeing someone for years, and we had no idea because she was hiding it."

"And you found out? That's why you argued," Azriel suggested.

"No, of course not! Even if that's the case, it's her business. Of course, it hurt to find out so late, but she still had the right to keep it private," Gwyn grumbled, clearly trying not to show how much it pained her. "But today she announced that she wants to move in with her. To another country! To another damn continent."

"People sometimes change their circumstances," Azriel calmly said, immediately realizing he should've stayed silent, as Gwyn glared at him. "So, what's the real issue?"

"The issue is that her girlfriend asked her not to tell anyone about their relationship. The issue is that her girlfriend is married to someone else!" Gwyn continued indignantly. "She's freaking married and still asking Emerie to move with her somewhere. Az, come on, it even sounds like some kind of scam."

She gestured wildly, and Azriel tensed a little at the description because it all sounded suspiciously familiar. Slowly, an unpleasant picture began to form in his mind, and he understood more and more why Gwyn was so worried about Emerie.

"I don’t want Emerie to waste her savings on some woman who will deceive her and leave her stranded in another country where we won’t even be able to help."

"And Emerie is resolute?"

"Yes. And it’s not even about Em," Gwyn scoffed. "Her girlfriend is shady. I only needed a few sentences to figure that out. I have a very weird feeling about her and their relationship. I don’t want to meddle in her business, but I also don’t want to lose my friend. This all sounds like a very toxic mess, and I don't like it. I want to protect her from it."

Azriel glanced at Gwyn from the corner of his eye, sensing her turmoil. He knew Gwyn wasn’t one to overreact, especially regarding people she cared about. If she had this strong of a reaction, it meant something was really bothering her.

"And what did Emerie say?" he asked, keeping his voice steady, as if trying to hold back his own unease.

Gwyn let out a frustrated sigh, rubbing her hands over her face. "That Nesta and I are overreacting. That it’s her decision, and we have no right to judge her girlfriend without knowing her. She didn’t say it directly, but I could tell she thinks I’m being controlling or something."

"And do you think… Emerie will listen to you?" he asked carefully.

Gwyn paused, her fingers twisting in her lap, her face tense. "I don’t know, Az. Part of me hopes she’ll take a step back and see things clearly, but I also know how stubborn she can be. She’s in love, or at least she thinks she is, and that’s making it hard for her to see the red flags. I just… I just don’t want her to get hurt."

Azriel could hear the worry in her voice, and it tugged at him.

"I don’t think your heated argument will change her decision," he said bluntly, sensing Gwyn hold back from rolling her eyes at his words. However, directness was something they both valued in their conversations, so he continued. "Talk again. In a calmer setting, without shouting. Poor Cassian almost had a heart attack listening to you guys outside. I don’t think that conversation was helpful for any of you."

"It was emotional," Gwyn muttered. "Imagine if I came to you and said that I had a partner all this time and I was moving away with them forever to another country. You’d be worried about me too."

"Of course, I’d be worried, Miss 'Relationships-are-pointless,'" Azriel chuckled. Gwyn reached over and playfully smacked him. Fair enough, he thought. "Kind of like how I was worried when you almost got sucked into that cult."

"I wasn’t getting sucked into a cult!" Gwyn protested. "It wasn’t a cult."

"With all due respect, Gwyn, it was definitely a cult. And back then, just like Emerie now, you refused to listen to the people around you," he reminded her.

It was a scary time. Gwyn had just lost her sister, and Azriel saw how shady people were taking advantage of her grief. He watched as the "support group" started holding meetings on Sundays, and soon, they were attending some temples that regular people had never even heard of. He saw how Gwyn believed in it, slowly sinking deeper and deeper, ignoring his warnings about how strange it all looked from the outside.

Eventually, Azriel convinced her to let him come with her to one of those meetings. Ten minutes was all he needed to hear the nonsense their "leader" was spewing. He punched the guy in the face, possibly breaking his nose or knocking out a tooth—he didn’t really check where the blood was coming from—and dragged Gwyn out of there.

"This is…" Gwyn took a deep breath. "This is different, Az. I was nineteen, not the most rational age. In this case, Emerie just needs to open her eyes to see how sketchy all this looks from the outside."

"Which is hard to do," Azriel finished for her. "You won’t be able to convince her, Gwyn. But you can always be there, so if things go south…"

"When things go south," she corrected.

"When things go south," he agreed, "Emerie will have your support."

Gwyn remained silent, clearly understanding his words, but still not ready to accept the outcome of their argument. Azriel, however, silently prayed that his suspicions about Emerie's girlfriend weren’t true because if they were, he’d owe Gwyn a long conversation, filled with details after which his friend probably wouldn’t stay still.

Damn, he was already ready to step in and try to convince Emerie how bad an idea it was to trust Morrigan. Even if he wasn’t entirely sure it was actually her she was dating.

Azriel drove Gwyn home. She was still emotional but thanked him for a ride. She offered to have him over, but Azriel declined, saying he had plans for the evening, knowing their hangouts often ended with wine, then tequila, and waking up full of regret, sometimes even in another city.

"You used to never turn down an invite," she teased, trying to lift her spirits.

Azriel played along, easing her task. "I’ve grown tired of your company."

"Oh no, you’ve just found a different company," Gwyn smirked, noticing the slight blush on his cheeks from her comment. "Look at that, I’m right. How’s your redheaded friend?"

"Couldn’t be better, always in the middle of some chaos, so it’s never boring."

Gwyn narrowed her eyes but didn’t press him further. "Well, in any case, I recommend more turtlenecks in your wardrobe. I didn’t want to say earlier, but your neck looks quite colorful."

Azriel instinctively placed a hand on his neck and snorted. "Go home, Berdara."

Gwyn only laughed at him and waved goodbye. "See you later!"

Azriel watched her until she entered her apartment complex, and only then did he drive home, smiling as he read a message from Eris that he was also heading back.

tag list: @sizzlingstarlightsky @isnotwhatyourethinking @molcat07 @chairofchaos @lilah-asteria

[swampbrick]

Y’all have waited so patiently for me to get my shit together and format this post, and for that, I thank y’all endlessly (for not calling me out on my avoidant personality and procrastination xoxo)

Without further ado, I give you…

Swamp’s GhostSoap Recs

PART TWO

(electric boogaloo)

My qualifications to make this post are that I’m neurodivergent and have read over half the damn archive at this point.

If you see your fic featured here and don't want it included in a rec post, just shoot me a dm! Will remove any from the list without question or complaint at the author's request.

Notes: I tried to sort some of them out into some broader categories for easier perusal, however, some fics might touch more than one of these topics. I went with whichever category was the MOST relevant in regard to the fic's content. Fics in italics are under 10K words. Stuff involving religious guilt and heavy religious undertones are marked in orange. Some fics are privated by the author- in that case the link might not work for you if you’re on mobile, so just look it up by author and title once you’re logged into your AO3 account. Happy reading!

Random Fics I Enjoyed and Can't Sort Into Broad Categories

The Wedding Lt. by SomnolentPavana

Like Watching Paint Dry by Grangers_apprentice

Mission Briefs by BleedingTypewriter

Don't be Scared by the Starting Gun by Suliana

Afraid (of Changing) by EmpressCirque

HALO by Cryypticchaotic

Tough Love by The_neurodivergent_nerd

Smooth Sailing on Choppy Water by coderaven

Poison Apple by surveycorpsjean

Punch Drunk by Drolly

Tesco's Finest by Vanemis

If You Don't Stop, I'll End up Believing You by Hochseeperle

Assorted AUs

like the dust (that hides the glow) by ArcadeGhostAdventurer [soulmates]

In My Time of Need by WhisperedWords12 [omegaverse]

lotus flower by exavibus [tattoo artist x florist]

Damaged Goods by Red_Clegane [lawyer x prostitute]

Safety Hazard by Red_Clegane [president's son x secret service]

On Leave

No Reqiuem by ice_hot_13

set your teeth against my throat (give me something pretty to wear beneath my blood-stained clothes) by aetherealmoss

let these hills absolve me by flowersferns (THE SHEERP FARMING FIC SOBBING CRYING)

solemn prayer, poppy in my hair by congee4lunch

A Scottish Bastard's Smile by SnarlingGherkin

The Fairtytale of Manchester by MildLimerence

Injury and/or Discharge

all that's said in the low light by headlocket (my favorite fic of all time actually if you haven't seen my 9000 other posts saying so)

My frozen heart (would melt just for you) by Red_Clegane

Clue by Wispscribbles

I Woke Up Underground by WispScribbles

Vicissitude by crows_and_curses

Yours Sincerely by LeoDoesGames

i'm a fire and i'll keep your brittle heart warm by marviless

Affirmative, Sir by Wixiany

To Drive a Man to Madness by Crypticchaotic

This Is (Mostly) P0rn

After Dark by Sylencia (THE BDSM CLUB FIC WOOF WOOF)

If I ever saw you try to be a saint (I'd be appalled) by Xalethar

Chicago Whiskey by Serpentwyne

Make Me Bad by Serpentwyne

gimme just a little bit (more) by applepieces [09!ghostsoap]

Promise Ring by LXVERSOFFENSE

Want It All by TuxedoHummingbird

A Fool's Gambit by MildLimerence

tame me by MikaelLo

the human condition by bilbhoebangins

All the Sins You Never Had the Courage to Commit by mothbeast

The Worthy Vessel by MildLimerence

Hotline by MildLimerence

Bonus Fic!

Here's a Gaz Centric, Poly141 fic that has ghostsoap in it but does not focus on it heavily enough to go in one of the other categories. This is Kyle's time to shine.

Hand Around My Heart by Grangers_apprentice

[cha-melodius]

Oh my goodness, I've just seen your fic festival request post and am excited to sneak in to participate before it closes. I love your writing and your stories so very much!

My prompt suggestion is... firstprince in Edinburgh, Scotland... in particular, the Edinburgh pride parade (if I may be so oddly specific). AU welcome, canon welcome, makeouts welcome, ahem.

Thank you and good luck wrangling everyone's prompts!

(Firstly, I have to say I love your url and your profile pic! Secondly, this is heavier on the Pride and lighter on the Edinburgh as far as the details go, but I hope it delights. Inspired in part by a tweet shared on tumblr; rated M for dick jokes. Happy Bisexual Awareness Week!)

Something To Be Proud Of

(firstprince, 3.3k, M; read it below or on AO3) read all the fandom fest fics

Henry stares at the carbon copy of the email in his inbox and wills time to go backwards. Just a few minutes, that’s all he needs. Enough time to go back and keep autocorrect from transforming whatever he’d typed after ‘he’ in his pronouns after his name into… that.

Thank you so much for all your help. Together we can make this a truly exceptional Edinburgh Pride. Regards, Henry Fox (he/hung Sent from Outlook for iOS.

How had he not seen it before he hit send on an email going out to every volunteer on their mailing list? How had he not noticed?

Maybe no one else would notice either. No one looks at email signatures that closely, right?

~~~~~

Ok, he’s not delusional enough to think that no one noticed. He had, however, naively believed that everyone would recognise it for what it was and politely ignore his gaff. He gets away scot free for a few days, and then, at the end of an email sent by a volunteer that is mostly as expected, he sees:

Best, Alex (he/him) PS: not sure I did the pronouns right. Does ‘Pride’ over here include being proud of your big dick?

It’s a damned good thing that he wasn’t taking a sip of his tea at the time, or he might be wearing it instead. Once he’s finished choking on nothing and perhaps isn’t quite the colour of a tomato (oh, who is he kidding, of course he still is), Henry professionally answers Alex’s questions about the schedule for the day of the march. He pauses before the sign off, wondering if he should acknowledge the flub or pretend it never happened. In the end, he writes:

Regards, Henry (he/him) PS: Your pronouns look correct to me, but they are, of course, your choice.

He only checks the email about ten times before he sends it. Hopefully, that should be the end of it.

~~~~~

It’s not.

Apparently, Alex has more questions. Apparently the law firm he works for is one of this year’s sponsors and is interested in potentially running a free legal clinic associated with the festival. A noble endeavour, which Henry is only too happy to assist with. He makes a mental note to look into logistics with Kate, the event’s chair, and continues reading. Finding out that Alex is apparently mature enough to be a lawyer lulls him into a false sense of security, though. At the tail of the email, he finds:

PS: regardless of the size of your dick, I’m impressed by the balls it takes to not acknowledge the typo. Then again, maybe it wasn’t? PPS: I’m trying out new pronouns. How do you think (daddy/sir) would go over?

Henry does spit his tea all over his phone this time.

He doesn’t email Alex back right away, but that’s because he has to wait to hear back from Kate. It has nothing to do with the fact that the prospect of dragging this interaction out longer is both horrifying and vaguely thrilling. Henry has noticed that he uses Americanised spellings in his text, which seems to fit with his general demeanour. It piques Henry’s curiosity, even though the thought of actually having to face Alex in person still makes him flush automatically. Eventually he gets an email from Kate that includes additional questions for the firm, as well as telling him that he can pass it off to someone in sponsor coordination. He is, after all, just the volunteer coordinator for the march. This need not involve him.

He still emails Alex back with the questions. And:

PS: Although I support your creativity, I am concerned those pronouns may not be appreciated in a professional setting such as, for instance, a court of law. Just a thought. However, I do suspect they might be rather popular at Pride.

~~~~~

They keep on exchanging emails, even though Henry should have sent Alex’s contact info to sponsor coordination ages ago, even though it becomes clear that Alex is not the one who will be ultimately responsible for the clinic either. On every one, there is a postscript in which Alex makes some kind of joke about the size of Henry’s dick.

do you have to get all your pants specially made with extra room in the crotch

do you have to check your dick as luggage when you fly

have you ever used it as a tripod

is your dick in another time zone

do you call your dick Sir Richard because it’s that prominent

In turn, Henry responds as dryly as possible, which only seems to encourage him. Oddly for someone who is volunteering at the event, Alex seems to have a lot of questions about Pride itself, as though this is the first one he’s attending on any continent. They exchange emails almost right up to the day of the march itself, but if they do taper off, Henry is too busy to notice. Coordinating volunteers for something as big as Edinburgh Pride is intense, and the days tick by before he even knows it.

He’s standing off to the side at the volunteer check-in tent on the morning of the march, going over some last minute logistics with one of his staff, when a voice carries over the hubbub, deep and rich with an out-of-place American accent.

“Sorry, but I was hoping… is Henry here?”

Henry straightens up and turns toward the voice only to find perhaps the most stunning man he’s ever seen standing at the front table. Dark, curly hair, a sharp jaw, big brown eyes with the longest eyelashes Henry has ever seen— he’s actually impossibly beautiful. Unbelievable, really. As is the fact that he’s asking for Henry.

“Hello,” Henry says as he walks over to the front. “How can I help you?”

The man’s eyes snap over to him, and he very clearly looks Henry up and down and swears, “Jesus fuck,” under his breath. Then his eyes come back up to Henry’s face, and he swallows. “You’re not Scottish.”

Henry cocks an eyebrow at him. “Neither are you.”

“Yeah, sorry. I just— need to adjust what you sound like in my head,” he says nonsensically. “I’m Alex?”

Oh.

Oh, Christ.

Henry should have known, because how many other Americans could there be volunteering at Edinburgh Pride? That reality does nothing to help him cope with the situation presented before him, though, in which this is the man who’s been teasing him about the size of his dick for the last month.

“I, uh,” he says eloquently as he tries to pull himself together. There are far too many people standing around watching this exchange. “Hello. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you. Did your firm get everything sorted with the clinic?”

“Oh,” Alex says, blinking. “Yeah, thanks. Look, I’m sure you’re busy, but I have something for you?”

It kind of comes out as a question, and he’s scratching the back of his head uncertainly, so even though Henry has no idea what’s coming, he nods. Then Alex reaches into his pocket, fishes out something small and round, and places it on the table between them.

It’s a button. A pronoun button, not unlike the one Henry’s already wearing, but instead it reads: he/hung.

Henry’s eyes snap up to find Alex grinning at him with the kind of mischief that Henry honestly should have expected from him sparkling in his eye. “Wanted to make sure you were prepared,” he says with a little one-shouldered shrug. “I’ll see you around, I guess.”

Then he takes his volunteer t-shirt and saunters off—and Christ those jeans are ridiculously tight and doing everything for his arse—leaving Henry gawping after him. A moment later, one of his regular volunteers, Robin, bustles by, catches sight of the button, and lets out a sound that can only be described as a cackle.

“My god, it’s perfect,” they say. “Did he really make this for you?”

Henry can only sigh, dragging a hand over his face. “It appears so. Robin, can you do me a favour?”

“Make sure you’re working the same stations all day?” they surmise. Henry doesn’t need to look to imagine the knowing grin on their face.

Henry wants to say no. Just because Henry’s already managed to combine the affection engendered by their previous email conversations with Alex’s stunning good looks into a powerfully intoxicating cocktail of a crush—well, that’s on Henry and his poor decision-making.

Instead, he says: “Yes, exactly that.”

~~~~~ ~~~~~

Alex had only signed up to volunteer at Pride on a whim. He’s always complaining that he doesn’t know anyone in Edinburgh outside of his coworkers, and one such coworker—someone that he could safely call a friend—suggested that getting involved in the festival would be a good way to meet people. Alex had tried to explain that he wasn’t actually queer, but she’d just given him an odd look and told him that allies were welcome at Pride too. It had felt a little weird signing up despite her assurances, but also kind of good. He was finally going get out there and have a life beyond his job.

He certainly hadn’t expected to strike up a prolonged email exchange with the volunteer coordinator, Henry. He also doesn’t really know why he kept finding excuses to send him new messages, except for Henry’s responses to Alex’s stupid jokes made Alex imagine him rolling his eyes and trying not to laugh, which only egged Alex on further. It was fun. That’s all.

Nothing about any of this made him prepared to show up to the volunteer check-in tent  today and be plunged directly into a sexuality crisis. But that seems to be exactly what’s currently happening now that he’s been confronted by quite possibly the hottest man he’s ever seen. Alex doesn’t even get it because it’s not like he hasn’t been able to objectively appreciate attractive men before, and blond hair and blue eyes have historically never really done it for him. Even if they are combined with swooping cheekbones, and broad shoulders, and obscenely full, pink lips.

All he knows is that as much as this doesn’t make sense, it also suddenly does. Why he’d felt drawn to sign up in the first place. Why he spent the last month reading about the history of Pride in Edinburgh and around the world. Why he’d gone on a deep dive doing research about different sexualities, brushing it off as wanting to be informed before meeting new people.

Why he was so obsessed with Henry’s dick.

Jesus fuck.

He thinks he manages to hold a short conversation. Somehow he even gives Henry the custom button he brought as a joke, smiling the whole time like he’s not moment’s away from dropping to his knees. He flees the table safe in the knowledge that Henry will likely be too busy coordinating stuff all day and Alex probably won’t see him again. That confidence is shattered when, not even an hour later, Henry shows up at the station Alex is supposed to be working. He’s even wearing the joke button, under his regular pronoun button and next to a little rainbow flag pin. Alex is going to die.

“Oh hey,” Alex says in a reasonable facsimile of nonchalance. “Did you need me for something?”

“Not exactly,” Henry replies. “I’ll be working this station too.”

Yeah, Alex is definitely not going to make it through the day.

~~~~~

It actually turns out to be not as bad as he feared, despite how Henry’s volunteer t-shirt is probably a size too small (never mind that in the context of everyone else at Pride he looks downright conservative) and Alex keeps getting caught staring at his shoulders or his back or his waist. Henry keeps on giving him weird looks at the beginning, probably because he’s expecting Alex to be cracking crude jokes. Too bad Alex is way too wound up in his own head to think of anything at all.

They’re pretty busy all day, but they do get a chance to chat occasionally, mostly small talk stuff about jobs and how they both ended up in Edinburgh. Henry is there for grad school, apparently, and has been volunteering for Pride since he moved out from under his grandmother’s restrictive shadow. In turn, Alex tells him about applying for the law job on a whim, desperate to set himself apart from his parents, and how much he likes Edinburgh (despite the weather). As the day stretches on and the streets fill up, Alex feels himself relaxing into his skin again, undeniably enjoying the festivities as well as Henry’s company.

See, the other thing he never, ever expected is how good it feels to be here. All the people around him loudly comfortable in themselves, and the color and glitter and celebration— it’s amazing, but it’s not just that he’s watching other people be happy. There’s a kind of ecstatic joy that bubbles up inside him at the fact that he’s part of it, one that he feels down to his bones. A sense of belonging that he’s never really experienced before, and that, more than anything else, makes him more certain of his newfound revelation.

Straight people probably don’t feel like this at Pride.

At the end of the day, he’s helping pack up the main volunteer tent when he comes across a table full of pins depicting different pride flags. He dimly remembers seeing them when he’d checked in and thinking that none of them applied to him. Now, he stares down at them and bites his lower lip uncertainly.

“There’s a box for those under the table,” Henry tells him from across the tent, misinterpreting his hesitation.

“Oh, yeah, thanks,” Alex says, and Henry’s already turning back to whatever he’s doing when he manages to continue, “Hey, can I— um, can I take one of these?”

Henry stops, his brow creasing as he tips his head slightly. “Of course. That’s what they’re there for.”

“Right, thanks,” Alex says with a tight smile.

He puts his hand out, hesitates, then picks up one with pink, purple, and blue stripes. Stares down at it for another moment before he realizes he’s probably being weird and he’s pretty sure Henry is still watching him. He swallows hard, then pins it to his shirt next to his pronoun button.

No one jumps out to call him out for being an impostor. Henry offers him a careful smile, then turns back to his work like he knows Alex needs a moment to himself. He lets his fingers rub over the surface of the pin, feeling the little enamel ridges, and something settles under his skin, like an itch he hadn’t even been aware of until it was gone.

He feels almost normal by the time Henry walks up to him once they’re finished and everything is packed away in someone’s car.

“Thanks so much for your help today,” Henry says. 

“It was my pleasure,” Alex replies, and means it more than he can say. “I’m really glad I decided to sign up.”

“I realize you may very well be tired of my face at this point, but if you don’t already have plans, I was wondering if you’d like to go get a drink?”

Alex would like to make a joke about how it might be literally impossible to get tired of Henry’s face, but at this point he’d probably fuck up and confess his undying love for a guy he just met. “Sounds great,” he says instead, looking around at where a few of the other volunteers are lingering nearby. “Do y’all usually all go out together afterward?”

Henry coughs slightly and glances down at the ground for a few seconds as his cheeks turn faintly pink. “Well yes, a group of them usually do. But I was actually asking if you wanted to go out with me,” he says. “Just the two of us.”

“Oh,” Alex breathes as his stomach decides to do a backflip. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

Spending all day volunteering with Henry was fun. Going on a date with Henry, being the sole focus of his attention, is intoxicating. Alex feels like he could sit here all night listening to Henry talk about his research on queer history, although that’s far from the only thing they talk about. As the night wears on and the pub slowly empties, Alex is buzzing with a few drinks and the euphoria of really clicking with someone, already wondering when would be too soon to ask Henry out again.

Henry shifts slightly so his legs press against Alex’s where they’re tangled together under the table—have been for several hours, actually. He’s playing with the stirrer in his empty glass, and a little teasing smirk sneaks onto his lips as he looks up at Alex.

“So you made me a custom pronoun button but forgot your own?”

“Ah, you know,” Alex replies with a shit-eating grin and a one-shouldered shrug, “thought it would be too distracting, what with how everyone would be hitting on me all day.”

Henry hums thoughtfully, biting back a wider smile. “If you wanted to avoid that, you probably should have chosen some looser trousers.”

“That’s fair. I suppose you had to go for the room in yours.” Alex pauses a beat. “You know, on account of the size of your dick.”

That makes Henry actually laugh and shake his head fondly. “I was waiting all day for that.”

“Sorry to disappoint,” Alex says, chuckling along with him. It does feel like he owes Henry something of an explanation of why he was so weird all day. He looks down and licks his lips. “Can I confess something?”

“Of course,” Henry answers with a small, encouraging smile.

“A friend of mine suggested I volunteer for this because I wanted to meet people. Make new friends. But until today I actually thought I was… mostly straight?” Alex admits, trying not to wince as he stares fixedly into his empty glass. “Being part of this made me realize why I always felt a little like I wasn’t my whole self. So I was… kind of going through it a bit today.” He pauses, then adds, “Also you’re so ridiculously fucking hot that you kind of melted my brain.”

Henry laughs again, but it’s softer this time. Gentle. Alex kind of wants to sink into the sound. Henry’s cheeks are slightly pink as he extends a hand across the table, and Alex doesn’t hesitate before he slides his hand into Henry’s and links their fingers together.

“I’m glad to hear that, Alex,” Henry says. “I mean, the feeling like your whole self part. Not the brain melting part,” he adds, and Alex can’t help but laugh with him.

Henry doesn’t let go of his hand as they walk outside, and once they’re alone on the sidewalk he uses it to pull Alex close. He puts a hand on Alex’s hip and Alex has to tip his head up to look at him, and it’s a lot but he’s also pretty sure he’s never wanted anything more than to feel Henry’s lips pressed against his.

“I have a confession too,” Henry murmurs as he stares down into Alex’s eyes.

“Yeah?”

“I’ve been dreaming of kissing you since the very first moment I saw you.”

Alex lets one corner of his mouth tug upwards. “What’s stopping you, baby?”

“Christ, Alex,” Henry breathes, looking momentarily overwhelmed, but then he’s pressing his lips to Alex’s, and Alex feels his blood sing. It’s brief and chaste and leaves him aching for more, but then Henry looks down at him with heavy lidded eyes and asks, “Given your recent personal revelations, would it be terribly forward of me to ask you back to my place?”

“Ask away, sweetheart,” Alex replies, then he reaches up to touch the side of the ridiculous he/hung button that Henry is still wearing for some reason. “I wanna find out how accurate this button is.”

(It doesn’t take long for him to find out that the answer is: extremely.)

[nicoline1998enilocin]

Teachers Universe | Prologue

PAIRING | Teacher!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

WORD COUNT | 1.3K

SUMMARY | You just got out of your marriage to your ex-husband and now you're moving to the other side of the country with your son. Bucky finds out about the fact that he will have a new student in his class, and is excited to completely renovate his classroom.

WARNING(S) | This is your official trigger warning. Do not proceed if any of these topics upset you. Mentions of a messy divorce, swearing.

A/N | This one shot is part of my Teachers Universe AU, but can be read as part of the story, or a standalone one shot! 🖤

Likes and reblogs will be very much appreciated 💜

Main Masterlist | Bucky Barnes Masterlist | AU Masterlist

''I hope you rot in hell, you sick son a bitch!'' is the last thing you say before walking out the door, your divorce is officially finalized now, you're free. And it feels really good, a huge weight has been lifted off your chest and you can finally breathe again. You open the doors of the building and quickly walk away, in the hopes Steve won't follow you. Not that he'd want to, he was practically eye fucking your lawyer during this whole meeting. It wouldn't surprise you if he's got her bent over her desk right now, doing God knows what. You're glad you decided to move to the other side of the country, so you don't have to look at him again. Ever.

You get into your car, and that is where you break. All the tears you've kept in all this time, finally coming out in huge, long sobs, and you know you're not exactly looking pretty right now, but you don't care. Not even a single bit. All of the emotions are coming out and it just feels damn good. After a little while the sobs get softer, and turn into little sniffles, before you stop crying entirely. ''Oh my god, I look like shit…'' you say to yourself when you push down the mirror in your car, seeing your mascara all down your face, your entire make-up ruined now. It's a good thing you always have wipes in your car.

You take off all the make-up you were wearing and decide to go and get yourself an iced coffee before picking Luca up from school. Today is his last day in Sacramento, and tomorrow will be the first day on the road trip with you to New York. All the stuff you need has been packed, you just need to pack it into your car and drive off. Most of the stuff will stay behind, only packing enough clothes for both you and Luca to last yourselves a few weeks, and some sentimental items like photo albums and stuff like that. Everything else is for Steve to figure out what to do with. He can set fire to it for all you care. When you get to the drive-thru of Starbucks, you order your usual iced caramel macchiato and slowly make your way to Luca's school.

When you arrive, you get out of the car and walk towards the playground, to wait in the same spot where you wait every single day. You don't live far from school, but you enjoy the habit of talking to him about his day at school on the way home. ''Hi Mom!'' he says when he runs into your arms, ''Hey bubs, how was your day? Did you get to say goodbye to everyone?'' you ask and he nodded furiously that he did. ''I even got a goodbye present from everyone!'' he says and he wants to pull it out of his bag. ''Let's look at it when we're home okay? We need to get some stuff, and then we'll finally be going to New York,'' you tell him, and he's excited. Steve already said his goodbyes to Luca, but he wasn't happy with it.

Since you got full custody of him - Steve was deemed an unfit parent, he works too much and even though he can financially provide for him, the court has appointed you to be his legal guardian. This was a huge win for you, meaning you didn't have to see Steve anymore. On the drive home, you and Luca talk all about his day, the goodbyes to the class, and his teacher, Ms. Jones. They had a fun day, seeing that it was the last day of the school year, and he was officially on summer break, which was perfect for the road trip you had planned. You had planned to drive to New York and even though you could probably get there in about 3 or 4 days, you planned a week and a half to get there, so the both of you could do some sightseeing and stuff like that on the way.

When you arrive home, both you and Luca are getting all your stuff in the car, and you can see it does more to him than he is showing. ''Are you okay, bubs?'' you ask Luca, and he starts crying, he finds it hard to leave his dad behind. ''I'm gonna miss Dad so much, but I do like that you won't have to fight with him anymore,'' he says through soft sobs, and you grab him in your arms, his cheek flush to your belly when you hug him and softly sway back and forth to calm him down. ''I know it's hard and I know you will miss him, but it is better this way, for all three of us. But you can make new friends when we're in New York, and we will start our new life together,'' you tell him. He calms down when you offer to get him ice cream after dinner today. ''We will start driving to New York now, but for dinner, you can pick where we eat and have ice cream for dessert!'' you tell him, grabbing his face in your hands. ''Okay, Mom! I love you so much!'' he says and you kiss him on his forehead. ''I love you more, bubs,'' is all you say before getting in the car, and leaving your former life behind.

~ Meanwhile in New York ~

''Bucky, can we talk for a minute?'' Natasha asks when all the kids have gone home, their summer vacation has officially started now. ''Of course, something wrong?'' he said and turned his office chair around, facing her. He was finishing cleaning up his desk and seeing what stuff he would need for next year, and what he could throw away at this point. ''I just got informed that you will have an extra student in your class, Luca Y/L/N. He is transferring here from Sacramento since he is moving here during summer vacation. I don't know much about him, all I know is that because of this, he will start one week later,'' she says, and Bucky nods slowly. ''Okay, so I will have 28 students next year?'' he asks, and she confirms it. ''Thanks for letting me know, Nat,'' he says before she walks back to her office.

''Well, let's get this classroom ready for some new students in a few months!'' he said to himself, he is planning to entirely switch his classroom around, from the placement of his desk and the tables, all the way to the decor on the walls and everything in between. It has looked the same for a few years now, but he wanted to change it up this year. Something he has always liked is space, so everything will be space-themed next year. Right now, all he has to do is take the old decorations off and throw them away. ''Time for a fresh start,'' he huffs to himself when he takes the last corkboard off the wall, looking around the bare walls of his classroom. ''Can't wait to see what the next school year will bring,'' and with that, he turned off the lights in the room, ready to be decorated in a week or 2, after he enjoyed a well-deserved vacation to Mexico with Sam.

''So, you seeing anyone at the moment, Barnes?'' Sam asks when the both of them sit in a lounge chair by the pool, just relaxing for a bit. ''You know damn well I'm not interested in dating someone, Sam. I'm not ready, my ex messed me up and I'm done dating anyone for a long time,'' he says with a scowl on his face. ''Yeah yeah I know, I was just kidding!'' he says when he sees Bucky's face. Deep down, Sam hopes he will see his best friend happy with another woman, and start the family he always wanted. ''Who knows, maybe someone will walk into your life soon, and you will completely change your mind,'' he tried again, but the glare Bucky sent him was enough for him to drop the conversation with his hands in the air, ''I'm sorry!'' he chuckled lightly before talking about something else.

[latteseungs]

moth to a flame : seungmin

moth to a flame : ksm

pairing: seungmin x f!reader (ft. lee know) genre: heavy angst, smut, there's not a speck of fluff in this, non-idol au word count: 4.4k warnings: 18+ minors please do not interact. cheating (please do not read if you are uncomfy with themes like this and for the love of god please don't cheat), name calling (babe, baby, love), explicit sexual content, desperate / jealous / possessive unprotected sex, fingering, creampie, choking, use of foul language, drinking, masturbation (m), oral (f. receiving), no happy ending, god this is a lot wow

✦ 。description: you loved seungmin out of convenience. but he was almost everything you ever wished for. the only thing missing was he wasn't minho.

📓 .✦𓂃 masterlist | AO3 | reblogs are very much appreciated <3

author's note: be mindful of the timestamps. hihi. this fic is inspired by moth to a flame by swedish house mafia ft. the weeknd, illicit affairs by taylor swift, and a few hints of high infidelity by taylor swift too. i highly recommend giving moth to a flame a listen while you read <3 an additional warning that i hate y/n here. i really do. lmAO. also, would really really appreciate some feedback because this was kinda out of my comfort zone when it comes to writing. anw, thanks for being here!!

april 2023 7:46 pm

“Hi baby, how was your day?”

You felt a pang in your chest once you heard your fiancé’s voice. He was in the kitchen as usual, drinking his favorite homemade coffee as he watched kdramas on his phone, even if you have a fully functioning large tv in the living area.

“It was alright,” an outright lie.

Work was shit. Co-workers were shit. But even if everything in your work life is slowly coming into flames and you have no choice but to face some of the shittiest people ever as your clients, you can’t believe that the shittiest out of all of them was still you.

Seungmin seemed suspicious of how you answered, probably sensing that you were lying right through your teeth. How he knows you like the back of his hand was absolutely endearing. But sometimes, all it felt like were a ton of bricks on your back.

“You sure about that, babe?” He asked, starting to put down his phone on the table. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

You hate him.

You hate how so damn perfect he is. You hate how much he loves you.

But you hate yourself more for not loving him the same way.

5:15 pm that day

“You should have told them that it wasn’t possible then?”

“It was possible, but not with the time frame they gave me!” You exclaimed exhaustively as you crashed on the couch. You pulled Minho’s button down tightly around your body, finding comfort in his scent.

“And don’t you dare tell me that I should have told them too because you, of all people, know how much I need this deal closed.”

Minho scoffed, “Shouldn’t your fiancé know about this too?”

You abruptly fixed how you sat on Minho’s couch, pushing a hand through your bed-ruined hair. Seungmin knows about the deal you have been trying to secure for almost six months now, but he doesn’t know as much as Minho does.

And that’s on you.

“Please, he also knows about this,” you were defensive, holding up your arms to your chest as you tried not to overthink.

“Then you wouldn’t be here ranting about it again for probably the third time this week alone,” he petted Soonie on his lap as he gulped the rest of his beer. His eyes never landed on yours as he talked about your fiancé.

“He’s a lawyer, for god’s sake. He would have probably closed this deal of yours months ago.”

Minho was right. He always was. Even if he was one of the most outstanding chief marketing officers out there, you sure as hell needed a good lawyer to back you too. But your fucking pride and independent mentality are in the way. You knew Seungmin could have helped you ever since you talked about the terms and conditions of the contract. You knew that Seungmin could have easily discussed how you could have agreed with better terms. You knew that Seungmin could have lessened the stress that you were going through now. But you didn’t even share a peep with him, only the tip of the iceberg.

“You know me and my tendencies to not ask for help.”

“Yeah, I know,” he grimaced. “But I can’t help but think you have a different purpose; why you didn’t ask your Seungmin to rescue you.”

He sounded cocky and bitter, but you pushed that thought to the back of your mind. You didn’t ask your oh-so-perfect fiancé because you didn’t want to seem like a damsel in distress. You didn’t want to look like you were using his career to boost yours. This was your work, your business, so why the hell would you cry out to be saved?

“Care to enlighten me?” You poked, knowing damn well that Minho wouldn’t dare explain his thoughts.

“You did it to have reason to be constantly here, using my job as a cover-up, and not make it look like you’re cheating on your soon-to-be husband.”

december 2022

“Don’t be stupid,” Chan throws you a judging stare. “And don’t you dare look at me like that because I know you came to me for a reality check and not some advice you want to hear.”

You kept your mouth shut. Thinking about leaving your perfectly good boyfriend to get back with a borderline-toxic ex might be one of your stupidest thoughts to date. Chan, being one of your closest friends for the longest time, is verbalizing it because you can never admit it to yourself.

He sighed, plopping down beside you as he handed you the beer you requested. “Cheers,” he mumbled, raising his bottle of energy drink.

“It’s stupid, no?” You groaned. “Even the thought of it is stupid.”

“Yes, it is, and I’m glad to know that you actually recognize that.”

“But—”

“But, what?” He immediately cut you off, probably knowing what you’ll say next. “It doesn’t feel the same way with Seungmin? There’s no thrill? There’s no rush?”

Shame. You were the one who would judge people for leaving their partners just for a speck of thrill before. And now you’re the one being judged. You can’t lie to yourself because you know for a fact that you deserve it.

“People would kill to be in a relationship you’re currently in, y/n. That peace you’re feeling with Seungmin? Some people crave that because they know that ‘peace’ in a relationship is what you call home. It makes them realize they’re finally with the one they’re meant for.”

But it doesn’t feel that way with Seungmin.

It was smooth sailing with Seungmin. It was actually a breeze with him—safe. He treated you like royalty. You don’t even want to think about how he looks at you because you would feel guilty even contemplating leaving him. He would hold you in his eyes like you had the entire universe. And in his world, maybe you did.

“Look,” Chan cleared his throat. “I am in no place to say this, but you need to hear it.”

You took a gulp of your beer before looking at him, prepared to hear the most heart-wrenching speech that would finally wake you up to reality and stop with your fantasy land.

But the words that came out of Chan’s mouth were something you would have never expected. Not at least for another two or three years.

“What do you mean he’s going to propose?” You gasped. It wasn’t impossible, considering the two of you have been dating for at least three years. The both of you had a stable job, your family adores him, and you’re both living together… it made sense. It would be more unusual if he wasn’t thinking about it. But to you, it felt too soon, like you were rushing into it.

“I’m not that kind of person who wants to put words in other people’s mouths, but just hear me out, okay?” he squeezed his hand on top of yours.

“Say yes. Accept it. Nothing gets better after Kim Seungmin. Trust me. Minho gave you nothing but heartbreak.”

7:58 pm

“No, baby, it’s okay, really. I’m just tired from work,” you said, kissing Seungmin on the cheek.

He sighed as he got a whiff of Minho’s perfume off of his fiancée. He wasn’t sure how many times he got to smell it that week, but he stopped counting right after knowing that this would be a regular thing for you.

You were being distant again. You always were right after being with Minho. Even if you try your best to hide that you were with him that day, a scent always lingers. Seungmin honestly doesn’t know if you were sleeping with your ex or doing anything physical with him; the fact that you would rather be with someone else hurts the same way.

Seungmin tried. He really did. But it seems like he was never really enough for you. Seungmin wasn’t dumb. He knows you were still madly in love with your ex-boyfriend even after you said yes to his proposal. He knew what he was getting into when he first started dating you, but he thought that over time, he could finally replace Minho in your heart. So maybe he is a little stupid, thinking you could get over the love of your life.

“Do you want me to run you a bath, babe?” Seungmin asked as he entered the bedroom. You were a little startled because you were in the middle of changing, but you immediately settled down when you turned to see him.

“Thanks, baby, but I’ll just cha—”

Seungmin interrupted you with kisses trailing down your neck from behind. His hands swiftly made their way to your bare waist as he gently pulled your back to him. He made sure that you felt the growing bulge from his pants.

He wanted to see if some part of you still belonged to him.

A soft moan escaped your lips, but you held Seungmin on the nape, making him halt his ministrations to your skin. “I’m not in much of a mood today, Seung.” You whispered apologetically.

That felt like a gunshot to Seungmin’s chest. He rested his head on your shoulder in defeat.

“We haven’t had sex in almost a month, y/n,” He breathed, honestly ready to raise a white flag. The way he said your name was so full of emotion and pent-up exhaustion.

He wasn’t trying to force you to do anything with him. He wasn’t some sex-deprived maniac. He can keep his dick in his pants. He doesn’t even mind if you both don’t fuck for more than a month. What worries him is that you don’t want to do it with him. This was one of the things that Seungmin was holding on to, one of the things to see if you were still even slightly attracted to him, whether it may be purely physical, he’d accept it.

It was a desperate move. But Seungmin was desperate.

You stiffened in his hold after you heard him. Twisting in his linked arms, you circled your own on his neck. “Has it really been that long?”

Seungmin didn’t even try to look at you, his eyes locked on the floor.

“I’m sorry, Seung,” you rested your palm on his cheek, turning his head in your direction, getting him to look at you. “I’ve just been so busy with the deal.” You sounded so guilty, and of course, as always, Seungmin ate it up. He always drops down his walls whenever he feels even an ounce of love from you.

“Let me make it up to you,” you started to go down to your knees, but Seungmin immediately pulled you up.

“Baby, you don’t have to do that,” he said, holding onto your arms.

“But I want to,” you dragged, starting to pepper his face with kisses.

And that was it. Seungmin folded. You have him wrapped around your fingers once again. At least he knows he was not entirely out of the picture yet.

“If you want to make it up to me, let’s do it properly,” Seungmin grumbled before kissing you fervently. He tried to kiss you with so much passion; maybe there, he could make you feel all the raw love he has for you.

Even if you don’t feel the same way.

He laid you gently on your bed, a soft moan escaping your lips when his knees came in contact with your center. Seungmin did it again and applied some pressure, making you squirm under him.

“Seung,” you moaned out, hands lifting his shirt. Your hand ran through the expanse of his torso as Seungmin shivered lightly with the way you traced his toned stomach.

He made his way down to your legs, two of his fingers tracing your clothed, wet core. He placed kisses on the inside of your thighs before pushing your underwear to the side. He tentatively placed his tongue on your clit, and you covered your mouth to stop yourself from letting out a loud groan.

He ran a stripe of his tongue on your sex, making you hold onto his hair with greater force than you intended. Seungmin felt his pants restrict even more with every sound you make, with every pull of his hair that you do. But even if he started to feel uncomfortable with how his cock went hard, he continued to lap you, making sure that no one else would make you feel the way he was making you feel right now.

“Fuck, Seungmin!” You let out, not stopping yourself anymore.

With the scream that left your lips, Seungmin couldn’t help himself. He took out his cock from his pants and pumped himself off as he continued to push his tongue in you, his other hand circling your clit.

“Yes, baby. Don’t stop. That’s so hot,” you were panting, feeling your release coming to a close when you saw Seungmin getting himself off with his hand while he ate you out.

When you started to feel the buildup in your lower stomach, Seungmin stopped altogether. You almost complained before you felt him enter you with no warning. He bottomed out immediately with how wet you were. You could instantly feel his cock in parts of you that only felt like heaven.

Seungmin tried to muffle his groan by kissing your chest, but his voice still resonated. He undid your bra quickly as he started to thrust into you. He palmed your breast, the other being sucked into his mouth while he slammed his hips into you.

“Oh my fucking god, Seungmin!” You practically screamed.

His hands on your tits were now placed around your neck, adding a little pleasure you always liked.

“You’re mine, right?” Seungmin suddenly asked.

“Yes.”

“Say it.”

You can feel your release starting to build up again on your lower stomach as you continue to take your fiancé’s cock in you. He was hitting all the right spots, and you were starting to see stars.

“Say it!” Seungmin demanded again.

“I’m yours, Seungmin!” He felt you come around him, your constraining walls feeling perfectly around his throbbing dick, your moans filling the bedroom.

“You’re mine,” he mumbled, his thrusts starting to feel erratic as he came too close to release. “I’m the only one who gets to come inside you.”

Seungmin was surprised by the words that left his mouth. He was never this possessive. Not even during sex. But maybe all the feelings that he’s been trying to bottle up were slowly spilling.

“I’m yours, Seung.” You whispered again before feeling Seungmin shoot his hot cum around your walls.

1:43 am

“Do you hate me that much to call me at this hour? Are you for real right now?” Minho grumbled from the other end.

“Then why did you answer, you dipshit?”

“Because I have no self-control when it comes to you.”

A silence enveloped the two of you. All you could hear was rustling and maybe one of the cats trying to lay beside Minho in bed.

You snuck outside your bedroom just to go out the balcony so you could call him in peace, ensuring that Seungmin was sleeping soundly in bed. After what happened with Seungmin earlier, it made you wonder if you were really not paying that much attention to him anymore. He rarely showed that vulnerable side of himself to you because he was always so composed and put together. Seeing him somewhat defeated earlier made your chest hurt.

You admit you’re unfaithful, but it doesn’t mean you don’t love him even, if that sounds so messed up.

“C’mon, what do you want? I have to leave early for work later, and Doongie is getting real chatty.”

You chuckled after hearing the constant meowing from the background; Doongie was probably grumpy that you woke him up too.

“It’s nothing. I just…” You sighed, not even remembering why you called Minho. Now you have to think of something important because he would probably not let you hear the end of it the next time you see him. If there is a next time, at least.

Thoughts started to leave your mind as your heart calmed at just hearing the sound of Minho’s breathing. No matter what others say about him or what he did to you when you were together, nothing would amount to how he makes you feel. Who would have thought that breathing through a call would calm you down? He didn’t even need to say anything.

“If I… if I break it off with Seungmin… Would you take me back?”

The question suddenly came out of you. It wasn’t even what you were planning to say. But the long pause that Minho gave as a response was already an answer.

When you were about to say you would hang up, Minho cleared his throat.

“Would you leave Seungmin?”

one week later 7:50 pm

“Aren’t you supposed to be rich?”

You scoffed at Minho’s snarky comment, but you continued to stir the pot in front of you.

After the little call that you made with Minho last week, it really shook something inside you. But you, being the coward that you are, ignored it. You promised yourself that you would start coming to Minho for business-related purposes only. Still, here you are again, cooking a meal for the both of you instead of doing it for your boyfriend.

“You probably have a personal chef at your beck and call in your huge penthouse, so why the hell would you ransack my barely stocked cupboard and refrigerator for food? You do know that I have three cats to feed, right?”

“Shut up, that’s nonsense.”

“How dare you call my cats nonsense? Look at those little devils enjoying their playground that’s worth at least a month of my sala—”

“Idiot!” you playfully hit Minho’s arm after he misunderstood what you said. “I was talking about having a personal chef; that was nonsense. I’m not rich.”

“Yeah, say all you want. But your fiancé is probably swimming in money.”

There he goes again. You sighed, turned off the stove, and removed your apron as you entered his living room.

Minho has been quite vocal about you being with Seungmin lately. It was like an unspoken rule between the both of you to rarely talk about him when you two were together. Seungmin doesn’t exist when it’s just the two of you. But recently, he keeps pointing out how you were with someone else.

You heard his footsteps follow you to the sofa, but you didn’t even want to look at him. He called out your name, but you didn’t respond. When his voice went stern, you finally glanced in his direction. He stood a few feet away from you, hands bawled into fists.

“Leave him,” Minho’s voice was barely above a whisper, but you heard him clearly. So loud that you felt like it echoed throughout the whole apartment.

“What?” You feel breathless, feeling like you were underwater; your body suddenly doesn’t want to move to gasp for air.

“Be with me.”

Minho was determined. He was finally tired of hiding. He was tired of pretending he was okay when you didn’t stay the night or hurry home before the two of you get caught. He was so sick of trying to meet you in secret or only seeing you when there was no sun outside.

He wanted to hold your hand, grab you by the waist, kiss you on your forehead. He wanted all those things back. He loved you and wanted everyone to know how much he did. He may have fucked up before, but he swore he would do better when you decide to be with him instead.

He was sick of all the sneaking around and all the lies he needed to remember. He doesn’t think he has the stomach to hold it all together much longer.

“Choose me.”

Tears were pricking your eyes, and your vision blurred with the image of Minho waiting for your answer. All you could do was open your mouth, but no words came out. You weren’t sure of the answer the day he asked if you would leave Seungmin for him. You thought that some part of you could do it and finally be with Minho. He was your greatest love and you thought you could drop everything just to be with him. But right now, with Minho almost begging you to be with him, leaving Seungmin suddenly became a clear-cut picture in your head.

You couldn’t do it.

Seungmin was too perfect. His love for you was so pure. You know that you can never return the amount of love he has for you, but you know for sure that you love him enough to stay.

And you don’t love Minho enough to choose him.

“I—”

A single tear fell from Minho’s eye. He knows.

“No, don’t,” he sighed. “you don’t need to say it. He’s good for you.”

8:06 pm

The silence between you and Minho was ear-piercing. Even after deciding that you’re not leaving your boyfriend over him, you can’t believe he still has the heart to lead you outside his apartment and volunteer to take you to your car because of how dark the streets get.

It would have been pitch dark outside if not for the dimly lit street lights and the flashlight on Minho’s phone guiding your steps on the pavement as you looked for your car. You were so used to leaving Minho’s apartment at this time that the darkness didn’t even bother you anymore.

Not until a voice so familiar called out your name from a distance.

“What’s this?”

Your heart dropped to your feet.

“Seungmin—”

“Is that Minho with you?”

Minho was suddenly in front of you, his body covering yours as Seungmin stepped closer to the both of you.

“What the hell are you doing with my fiancée?” Seungmin’s voice was raised, a voice you had never come out from him through all the years that you were together. He doesn’t look like himself. His eyes were blazing with mixed feelings, anger, hurt, betrayal, and it was all because of you.

You pushed Minho away from in front of you and ran towards Seungmin, tears overflowing in your eyes as you tried to reach for your boyfriend’s hand.

“Seungmin, I can explain, I promise!” You sounded hysterical, trying to get a hold of Seungmin, but his eyes were zeroed in on the man behind you.

“Seungmin!” Grabbing his face in your hands, you tried to get him to look at you instead. “Listen to me. This isn’t his fault. It’s me, all me, okay?”

“No,” He removed your hold from him, the voice he let out seeming like broken glass but unwavering. “You listen to me.”

A strained whimper came out from your lips, not knowing what to do. It felt like your whole world was falling apart slowly and painfully right in front of your eyes with every tear that fell from Seungmin’s eyes.

It was you who did this.

“You know what? All this time that you’ve been sneaking around with him,” there was so much venom in the way he spoke as he pointed at Minho, but he remained quiet and still, letting all the anger fall on him.

“I know about it. I’m not naive! But I told myself that one day, one day, you’re gonna stop,” Seungmin tried his best to hold in his sob, but it was too much for him. “One day, you’ll finally feel that you belong with me.”

He tried his best to remember all the times he did you wrong. He tried to think if everything he did was too big of a mistake that you have the need to cheat on him. Did he not treat you right? What was missing from him that you found in Minho instead?

He ran a hand through his hair, furiously wiping the salty tears that kept falling. “Every fucking time I smell his perfume off of you, I told myself that I would turn a blind eye to it as long as you don’t get yourself caught. As long as I’m the one you come home to.”

The pain you were feeling right now would never amount to the pain that Seungmin was feeling. All the time he kept it all in, it finally pierced through his chest, that it felt like he was physically bleeding from the pain.

“Do I love you too much to do that?”

You sob, unable to bear how much hurt you’re putting him through right now. You tried reaching for him again, but he immediately stepped away. He looked at you like he saw a completely different person was before him, not someone he asked to marry.

“Seungmin, please. I stopped. I promise I did. I already cut things off with him to stay with you,” at that point, you didn’t care. What you said was so wretched and cruel for both of the people there with you, but you couldn’t possibly see your future without Seungmin. It was too late for you to realize that, but you’re taking all your chances here just to be able to stay with him.

He scoffed. He couldn’t honestly believe that you thought you would win him back with that. “Is that supposed to make me happy? Is that supposed to redeem yourself?” He questioned incredulously. “Do you think that you finally leaving Minho after all these months, I would forgive you?”

Minho remained quiet behind you. He just stood there, taking all of it in. He deserved it. In fact, he thought he deserved more than the words coming out of Seungmin. He probably deserved a hit in the face or a few curses and vile words from your fiancé, but Seungmin wasn’t like that. That’s how nice he was; he wouldn’t even curse the man you had illicit affairs with.

While you, on the other hand, can’t do anything but cry. It was pathetic of you, but you know there was no escape from this. This was the end of the line, and you knew there was no one to blame except you and your selfishness.

Seungmin covered his tear-stricken face as he let out a choked laugh, “It’s fucking bullshit that I still don’t hate you after all of this.”

Copyright © 2023. latteseungs on tumblr. reposts are NOT allowed.

[santacoppelia]

Do you have any favorite Good Omens fics you would recommend, or have you written any?

Hi there!!!

Oh, dear, I have A TON! I'm not sure if they would be "new", but here I go, nonetheless. I read a lot of AU fics (and I'm writing one), so I hope it's not a pet peeve of yours! I'll try to limit myself and not recommend things that I have seen recommended a lot (like "Factory Settings", "the therapy one with the impossibly long name" LOL, "Slow Show", "Oopsie Omens"... I'll make a couple of exceptions, tho). I also read a lot of WIP's, love angst, hurt/comfort and fluff, and prefer skipping over smut (Not a against it per se, love sexy times with feelings), so my selection is... Very particular. Here it goes!!

Demon and Angel Professors: I adore this series of short fics. There are 200 of them in the collection, they all are 666 words long, and both the guys and the new characters are absolutely endearing. The diversity of the cast was a welcome addition.

Listen, Will You Learn To Hear Me From Afar?: This one is short, a little sad but very, very sweet. Aziraphale starts receiving flowers and poems every three years, after Crowley disappears in Edinburgh. I loved the poetry selection.

Stalwart Sun, Wily Moon: Probably, my first AU and the one that started it all. I'm pretty sure this is one of the "everyone and their grannies have already read this", but I adore the relationships, the way the characters transformed by entering this universe (Crowley being a fantastic art thief with a magnificent taste for clothes was something I never knew I needed). I would absolutely watch an adaptation of this fic to the screens.

Too Wise To Woo Peaceably: This one is, probably, another one of the "everyone has read this fic and I don't care", but I really feel deeply about it and its author. It was a tour the force, with daily posting and the author reading and answering the comments EVERY.SINGLE.DAY. Feral But Fluffy brought me single-handedly into being an active participant in this fandom instead of just lurking in the corners. It's a fantastic continuation from the ending of Season 2, with a lot of angst, hurt, laugh and comfort. And Muriel rings absolutely true in here.

Give A Man A Mask: Another one by Feral! This one is a beautiful seduction game, taking Venice and a Masquerade as the background. Sexy, exciting, and hurtful at the same time.

Postcards From Paris: I find myself absolutely enraptured by the AUs created by Ghostrat (and their illustrations!! I use his AU Streamer!Crowley as my laptop wallpaper), but this one is very close to my heart. One lonely lawyer starts receiving postcards addressed to the previous tenant, signed by one AZF. The concept and execution are lovely. His Streamers AU is also very funny, and the Professors AU (Mon Horrible Cheri) is one of the "must reads with a lot of hits that recommends by itself".

Husband Material: This AU has made me laugh A LOT. Crowley is a wedding planner... And he has to plan the wedding of "the one who got away", Aziraphale. It is still a WIP, and it lights my day whenever it appears in my inbox.

Shepherds of the Damned: an after S2 work, the Crowley recovery arc in this fic had my heart leaping. It is also gripping and full with angst and action. A very noble S3, if you ask me.

Symphony of Second Chances: in this AU, Crowley is a drummer, recovering from a terrible shoulder injury and trying to get back to his place in the orchestra. Aziraphale is the visiting director for the next season... And they are absolutely smitten with each other. A lot of hurt and the sweetest comfort ever (it made me want an Aziraphale in my life more than ever). Still a WIP.

The Anon Before Christmas: This fic was pure happiness and tooth rotting fluff, ideal for December, with a warm cup of cocoa. They are humans and have the nicest group of friends one can ever imagine... But they loathe each other. Of course, one meddling Anathema makes sure to make Crowley Aziraphale's Secret Santa.

To Love The Stars Too Fondly: Another fantastic post S2 fic, filled with love and angst and adventure and all the right things to make it a gripping read, and a GREAT ending. Another take that could be a satisfying alternate canon.

Because We Are Carying The Fire: A horror AU! Aziraphale is a professor with a PhD in parapsychology, and one day he receives a mysterious book. Weird things happen, and he looks for the help of Crowley, a podcaster and self appointed demon expert. It is a WIP, and it really delivers. It is romantic and terrifying at the same time.

And my works!

I've written a short fic, Rebellion, speculating with the causes of The Starmaker's Fall. It came from a prompt imagining "what if rebel angels had been creating alternative lifeforms in the Universe", and it turned slightly dark (because I'm me). I'm also writing and publishing a longer fic, Under The Fold, an AU where AZ Fell and AJ Crowley are journalists who made an exposé that put them in danger and where they will have to use all of their researching abilities to bring justice (and avoid dangers). I've already written 2/3 of it, and half of it is already up, if you feel like reading it!

I enjoyed answering this entirely TOO MUCH. Take all this reading suggestions!

[mugram]

mini analysis: censored voicelines

010: "**... **’s g***."

"Ah... It's gone."

not too sure. didnt really have much to work with here.

009: "* c**'t ** a**t*in* ***e *o* **em."

"I can't do anything else for them."

took me a long time to get those middle ones but when i noticed the "t*in*" i figured it was "thing".

008: "*’* s****."

"I'm sorry."

easiest one so far ngl. voting forgiven just for that.

007: "**– N*, **, t**s ***n’t s**p*s*d t* h***en–"

"[???]– No, no(?), this wasn't supposed to happen–"

that first one could be another no or an "ah" idk but it doesnt really matter either way.

006: "* n*** t* *** h** b**k, **** it!"

"I need to [???](win?) [???](him/her?) back, damn it!"

yeah this one is mostly speculation. i could be totally off with the him/her thing.

005: "Y**, i*’* b*** d**e. ***d ** *ve* n*w."

"[???](yes?), it's been done. [???] is over now."

deadass this one had me googling words with 4 letters starting with b. couldnt figure out the most important word??? cries.

004: "H**. H** un***e**ed."

"[???](huh? hah?). How [???](unaffected?)."

:( its hard

003: "Y*u sh**ld h***e kn*** t*** ***n’t g**d f*r th*m. **u s****d h*v* ***w* **i* ***n’t *oo* **r t**m. Th**’*e d**d b**au*e o* y*u."

"You should have known this wasn't good for them. You should have known this wasn't good for them. They're dead because of you."

oh my god. thank you. this was easy. thank you for being simple.

002: "S***!! F***! Th*s wa**’t s*****ed ** h***en! W* sh**ld h***e l**t w**n ** *a* th**– D*** i*!"

"Shit!! Fuck! This wasn't supposed to happen! We should [???] [???](left? lost?) when we had [???](that? this? them?)– Damn it!"

bro thinks hes fuuta lmaoo but yeah im a bit stumped.

001: "Y*u c**’* ** s****us… The* c*n’t **..."

"You can't be serious... They can't be..."

why so serious? -the lawyer

[ind1c0lite]

I do not frequently message people online but I absolutely Needed to communicate to you how entranced I am by your copycat au oh my god. I read the initial comic and I had to go for a jog around my apartment I was so floored. Absolutely fantastic work thank you so much for sharing!!!!!!!

What with capcom calling the switch port of aa4-aa6 the “Apollo Justice Trilogy” (which I have dubious feelings on) I’ve been thinking a lot about Apollo’s role in aa5 & aa6 (esp aa5) and your au is just. so perfect for reflecting more of Apollo and his story from aa4 forward into aa5. The potential within it to actually consider things like Apollo still being a very fresh-faced & inexperienced lawyer in the grand scheme of things and feeling inadequate for both 1) being unable to save Phoenix (in the moment, obv everything ends for the best) and 2) being unable to adequately help Athena, him having to grapple with the thought that he has yet another mentor who has betrayed him again, bringing up what’s actually touched on (though not enough imo) in the original dd of him feeling like an inadequate defense lawyer because he can’t be 100% certain of a clients innocence (tho ofc in this case it’s Phoenix instead of Athena) (“of course he’s innocent he’s the Turnabout Terror! ………but Kristoph Gavin was the Coolest Defense in the West…”, the added layer of making him have to consider Phoenix committing Clay’s murder and the two possibilities being 1 - Phoenix actually did commit the murder (awful) and possibility 2 - Phoenix didn’t commit the murder but he’s intentionally trying to let whoever did commit the murder go free for unknown reasons (bonus points - (Apollo thinks) Phoenix is leaving him in the dark again) (also awful) (obv as you mentioned at this point Athena and Apollo have no concept of a phantom villain so that’s not an option lol) …eugh it’s all so good…

And all of this on top of keeping Klavier relevant in a meaningful way (continuing the story from aa4) And having to deal with the potential fallout he would feel from Yet Again being the one to tear down Phoenix Wright with his own hands (plus the later fallout of how he would feel knowing he was (at least partially successfully) yet again manipulated and used as a tool specifically to harm Phoenix Wright) + the parallel of having Athena, yet again, having to stand in court and be able to do absolutely nothing to help those close to her (just like when she “failed” Simon) + potential Trucy fallout from having a father willfully disappear from her again. Even if she 100% believes in Phoenix’s innocence then that still means her father is intentionally covering something up and intentionally taking an action that will remove himself from her life (either via jail or via execution) and god damn that’s gotta sting + if Simon hears about this and thinks the Phantom is at play again either 1) feeling helpless and unable to prove anything because he’s stuck in the hospital and he just has to sit and watch the Phantom ruin another family right in front of his eyes or 2) (if he doesn’t Quite realize the Phantom Is Phoenix rn, he just thinks Phoenix has been tricked into covering for the Phantom) then he’s watching someone make his exact same mistake right in front of his eyes and the Phantom will continue to run free yet again eugshdhhcgsgshsh and oh my goddddddd don’t get me started on the parallels between Phoenix and Edgeworth having their roles reversed from Turnabout Goodbyes (even if it isn’t actually Phoenix, Edgeworth (probably? maybe?) doesn’t know that) basically just. Oh my god. Stellar fucking job with this. Sorry for all the rambling I just desperately needed to communicate to you how fantastic of a concept this is and thank you so much for sharing it. (also apologies for my rambles that are probably pretty off base from precisely what you have in mind for this au, obv some of what I rambled about is likely either blatantly wrong/opposing your vision, or just hasn’t been revealed yet, but I saw the two comics and the profiles and basically immediately started spiraling /pos, consider them au’s of your au lol) (also on the off chance you ever want to further discuss your au just say the word and I Will come off anon lol)

OUGHHHHH ANON I A M !!!!! I WAS N O T EXPECTING A WHOLE ENTIRE ESSAY IN MY INBOX ABT RAMBLINGS ON THE COPYCAT BUT I AM GRINNING E A R TO EAR ABOUT THIS IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE IT SM!!

I ALWAYS LOVE HEARING PEOPLE RAMBLE!!! YOU HAVE PICKED UP E X A C TL Y WHAT IVE LAID OUT AND WHAT I WANT TO DO WITH THIS AU SO WELL I JUST

I HAVE NO WORDS IM VERY HAPPY TO HEAR THERES SOMEONE JUST AS EXCITED AS I AM ABT MY OWN LIL AU HJGKHLJHGJ

I am always happy to talk more abt my au whenever anon!!!!

[krikeymate]

Foster AU: What would happen if Christina comes back after Idk 2 years and is like, "Yeah, I'm clean and sober, so give me back my babygirl" ? Does Tara still love her mom? How will Sam react? This is the woman who abandoned her; who hurt her little sister; who ruined their lives... I know that Sam adopts Tara, but I would love to hear your thoughts

Christina is actually dead in this AU, though it's been a month and 45 posts since the beginning where that was mentioned lol. Even if she wasn't, she would have been SO done for child abuse, it was pretty egregious here.

Now, however, we do have the AU that Foster AU spun off from where this question would fit. That AU got so overshadowed so fast 🥲.

In this AU, Sam fights for guardianship of her 8-year-old sister the moment she turns 18. Christina never goes down for the child abuse, because there was never 'any signs', Sam had protected Tara as much as she could from her mother, but that worked against them. But Christina was a heavy drinker, and she failed the drug tests forced by the courts, so she was found unfit and Sam got custody anyway.

The courts told Christina that if she sobered up she could begin to have monitored visitation with her daughter, and maybe one day she could earn her back. Sam is furious by the verdict, but Hicks' hand on her shoulder helps her calm down. It'll never happen, her mother's an addict, she'll never get clean. Sam comforts herself with these thoughts.

Her mother gets clean, and the courts demand she be allowed visitation. A child needs their mother after all, Christina's lawyer says. Sam wants to rip his slimy tongue from his mouth and shove it up- deep breaths. Sam can't help but wonder why. Why is her mother doing this, why did she get clean specifically for this? She never wanted Tara, never gave a damn about her. She's not even sure she ever gave a damn about her. Her mother had fought the case because it was damaging to her reputation, but that damage is done, so why is she fighting for Tara back now? It's not because she wants her, because she loves her, Sam's sure of that.

Tara's 10 now, and confused by the news. Tara looks upset when she asks Sam if they have to go back and live with her again. Sam will never tell Tara that if she has to go back, it would be alone. She'll take her and run before she lets Christina get custody again. Sam just ruffles her hair and says of course not, it's only a visit, and I'll be there the entire time.

Tara knows you're supposed to love your mother, everyone says so, so she supposed she must do. She thinks she should want to see her mum again, but in truth she's been so happy living with just Sam, even though the house is smaller and there isn't really a garden to play in.

Her mother hugs her and kisses her face and smiles when she sees her and says hello, darling and it's so weird. Tara isn't sure she can ever remember her mother hugging her, or smiling at her before. Mum stands and her face forms into the neutral scowl she's familiar with. "Samantha." "Christina." The woman scoffs at being called by her name.

The next two hours are filled with fake smiles and interest in Tara's life, with comments about Sam that Tara thinks are meant to be mean. They sound mean. Her mother's hand is constantly on her head, her shoulder, her arm, and it makes her squirm. Sam frowns every time she does it. Her mother frowns every time Tara glances at Sam before answering a question. She hopes she never has to do this again.

Her mother's see you next week darling dashes those hopes.

[wxywardsun]

[The Next Door Neighbor Verse]

(An Introductory post!)

Basically the “next door neighbor verse” is a supernatural AU I came up with that completely ignores the finale. Ever wanted to know where most retired hunters go? There’s well known cozy neighborhood that a lot of retired hunters go! Sam,Dean,and Cas all decided to move into this neighborhood and start fresh with their lives.

There’s you! Four years after the Winchester brothers retire with their angel following behind them,you find yourself retiring as well,and moving into the same neighborhood that the legendary team is in.

How about you get to know your neighbors?

Dean Winchester (Retired Hunter turned Mechanic)

Four years later,45 years old,a dog named miracle and a cozy home to call his own? He’s living the dream!

I’d imagine his look changed over the 4 years,imagine what Jensen looks like now.

Basically Beau Arlen but Dean!

He’s a mechanic and a damn good one at that

And he was more than willing to help ya move in

He would definitely be a lil more stocky,thicker arms,legs,the whole nine yards!

Still Dean Winchester just a tad bit softer.

And definitely still as charming as ever

He’s also taken after Bobby! He tells you “I’m retired that’s for sure,but I’ll be damned if I don’t give tips out to any hunter that needs it”

You can FEEL the Texas accent in his voice

You couldn’t thank him enough for helping you

He’s so sweet!

‘Welcome To the neighborhood pie’ anyone?

Friendly Retaliation with ‘Thanks for helping me move in’ brownies

He very much appreciated them

The slowest,slow burn,romance EVER (in a good way!)

Sam Winchester (Retired Hunter turned Lawyer)

40 years old,slightly longer hair and grown out scruff. in short? He hasn’t changed a bit!

Still as tall as a damn skyscraper that’s for sure..

He definitely has an Australian Shepherd named Bones (combining the two things about the dogs he owned previously)

Unfortunately you weren’t able to meet him till after he got off work

Definitely a wave and “hello” moment all casual “nice to meet you,I could show you around if you’d like?” Type of meeting

All in all,so damn sweet,he would 100% take his time telling you about the neighborhood!

Do I even need to say slow burn? Slow burn!

How DO you get closer to him? Hmm…

Castiel (or Cas) (Retired Hunter,pretty angel turned baker)

Like billions of years old

Looks a tad bit like Endverse!Cas! Grey hairs,a bit more stubble (mhmm,dilfism beam) arm hair,literally thee dilf of all time

In this au,yeah he does have to eat,he can taste things,and sleep,cause it makes things more interesting

He became a baker because he likes to busy his hands and baking is the perfect outlet for that

Also pastries,pies,the greatest cake you will EVER taste,he loves the art of baking!

Very much a Cas-like first meeting,somewhat short,probably heard your name around the hunting world and brought that up. A little stern but you could tell he was warming up already.

Definitely left a cookie basket with a business card on your front step,name on said card in blue ink. “From : Castiel”

So sweet! Like the cookies.

You’ll get closer over time,but first? How about baking a “thank you” cake?

[Requests are open! Feel free to drop them in my inbox or ask about this AU. See y’all around!]