#need management tools
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girls when their issues get dismissed as anxiety for the millionth time
#futaba sakura#persona 5#p5r#p5#fanart#futabadoodles#chat i am SO losing it#went to get diagnosed w adhd wasnt diagnosed because and i quote “it could be anxiety” omfg#neurotypical psychiatrists especially white ones die in a hole 🥰#also because i “wasnt struggling enough”#like hi so i have this thing called emotional intelligence a good support system and access to coping skills hope that helps!#god forbid a neurodivergent person has tools to manage their condition and isnt in hell everyday i guess!#hate her ass!!!!!!!#i wasnt looking to get diagnosed for medication or support bc i already use a lot of like adhd specific supports and shit#and w accommodations my anxiety diagnosis can cover what i need for the most part so it was rlly just a validation/confirmation thing#like idk yeah. i am managing. im not particularly struggling. because ive been selfdx for a while and have implemented changes in my life#and i happen to be in a very very good place rn and im very lucky. so like. ???#rlly felt like “you have all the symptoms but youre not struggling enough with anything to be able to diagnose ypu” ok thanks fuck you#cuz ppl w adhd can manage being unmedicated by choice i js wasnt officially diagnosed before i guess its deemed “okay” to not live in hell!#dunno im frustrated. i have difficulties but i manage them well and i am very lucky to live an easy life for now so like 😭??
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i girl bossed just the right amount tonight & learned how to make loading screens
#it's super easy and im so happy lmao#10/10 would recommend#you just need sims 4 mod manager#then select tools>fun tools>custom loading screen#input ur pictures and tada#they make it a package file
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my finger is healing slowly, but it is healing. it's got scarring on the sides where the damage was, likely on the tendons there. I still can't straighten it fully, and it still swells over time when I do art. but it's gone on to a silicone splint today! the rigid splint needs to be put on occasionally, and I have to massage it often with this horrid little wire sphincter to try and break up the scar tissue and give me flexibility and proper circulation back. I'm kind of mad that my attempt to fix my sleep disorder and correct my ADHD ended up in this injury that'll likely be permanent like... why did the meds do this. why they bully me. i just wanted to be better :(
i also have to go back to therapyyyy oh boy. turns out when you're unemployed and poorly socialized (autism presenting as social anxiety lol) and settle into minor comforts you start getting real skittish about changing that even though existing in it sucks. I just need to be coaxed out of the hole a little bit
#it's twice as expensive as my last therapist which i'm hoping means it'll be better. done thru the same company my psychiatry is as well#gonna be a lot of ACT and CBT combined. my adhd is mild but it's gone off the hook for too long. i need MANAGEMENT TOOLS
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only took 2 years but he's done now
#i started this piece back in dec of 2021 like.. aughh??#i just painted over the og hfashgsdh#it took so long i have managed to drop both crob and crk can you believe it#(hes still a blorbo tho.. the orange cookies r my bias for some reason..??? him.. plum.. orange herself.. red ones too..)#cookie run#cinnamon cookie#my art#his file has been through paint tool sai. medibang. and finally clip studio 😭😭😭#i rlly like how this turned outAHSGHFhgh tried a bit of a different approach n workflow and ahgh#i would want it to be less affected by my perfectionist need for everything to be cleanly rendered i wanna get loosey goosey with it yknow#now watch me disappear from posting art for another week before dropping another and the cycle repeats#ive been wanting to do more painterly stuff esp purposefully messy#i dont get how ppl leave it like that and have it look so good and intentional augh#anyways himb ☝
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annoying conversations happening on twitter this week about dazai and his canonical whoreness .... very ableist delivery of people treating him like a tiny 22 yr old minor who clearly doesn't know what sex is and its getting weeeeeiirrrrd ...........
#like idk and idc about other peoples perceptions but to me dazai fucks#its in the source material regarding the fact that hes a DOG and nobody understands how he manages to charm women#women send him love notes to the office bcs he doesnt give out his address......uses sex as a tool and people can infer what they want#but i dont have it has having any nefarious meaning other than he knows himself well and how to get what he wants#and (in MY mind) enjoys it :p#he says he appreciates ALLLL women#women being official the source content but to me he's a man with no preference :p#what i find ableist is the notion that someone with clear though unstated mental illnesses must be “protected” and “he doesnt know what#sex is" like come on. we read the same stuff#youre saying it because you think it gets in the way of ur fav ships that he whores around#well guess what!!!!! he does!!!!!#so what!!!!!! live with it!!!!!! everyone else has to!!!!!#women cry in the source content and i infer that to be bcs he just straight up ghosts them after#maybe he sees a couple of people a few times but for the most part#he dips </3#but we dont need to pretend hes innocent and like#sex - afraid#im tirrredddd of these takes they stink and theyre not fun to read#tldr: my dazai fucks (and WANTS TO!!!!!!!! SEEKS IT OUT!!!! ENJOYS IT!!!! SKILLED LOVER THAT U CANT HAVE!!!!)#(unless u get him.....then hes devoted teehee<3)#enuff said i think#ACTUALLY FURTHER POINT. hes a flirt and a whore. PROUD!!!!!!!!!#he gives u the eyes and he'll have u wrapped around his fingerrrr anyway. thats it now
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One of the interesting bits of trying to resume working on the game after so long is looking back at my ancient Draft Placeholder versions of an image from 4 yrs ago trying to remember what the hell I meant back then, to hopefully interpret it into some more final (ish..) form of the same thing .. making slow progress lol
#At this point I've decided it's just a consistent design decision to have the sketchy slightly wonky sort of art ghbjj#I simply don't have the digital art skills/tools/patience (mostly that) to do 100% digital things and have a Clean Polished Professional#Neat Looking Perfect Crisp Lines sort of thing like one would see in most games. I'm drawing everything in pencil half decently (not strict#ly making sure every line is straight or that the perspective even makes sense) and then scanning it in and coloring it on the computer#and that's about it. In another world I could hire an artist or two to do professional backgrounds and charcter art or etc. - but as I am#a mere penniless peasant hermit with functioning issues who has to do every aspect of everything themselves - I'm just going to do#what is possible within the time frame/my ability/etc. and then just be like ''ah you see! actually this is intentional~ it has a homemade#crafty hand drawn sort of charm about it - yes? this was the direction all along!!'' LOL#Which for the record I'm not like complaining that it's necssarily Bad or anything - more just I suppose not the Professional Polished#style you Typically see in a lot of things - again the like - sketchy unclean lines of it all.#(like I think usually people use some sort of symmetry tool to make sure that all sides of a box are neat and clean and have that#Professional Game Art type of feel about them - rather than 'this is a scan of scraggily pencil lines in which I did not even bother to use#a ruler or try to get them all that even' lol). So it's not that it's BAD really.#just I think.. perhaps ''unconventional'' compared to the examples of other#games I've looked at. BUT. the point is to convey an idea. I think your art has failed if you do not convey a concept properly. But so#long as it meets your purposes and is not SOO cluttered/scribbly that nobody can even tell what's going on (unless that IS your intention)#then like.. I think it's fine. You can tell a house is a house even if it's not polished. No worries. (<convincing myself)#ANYWAY.. also 'Nanyevimi Market Quest' is still SUCH a placeholder name but I genuinely can never think of anything else so#I've just been going with it for now ToT... There's no distinct actual throughline story/plot so there's no 'theme' to base a title#around. Kind of like how 'The Sims' is just called the sims because naming it like 'Sims: Downfall Of Pleasantview' (one of the#towns in TS2 i think) would be a weird misname since what happens in the game totally depends on what you choose to do with it#So you can't really name it anything THAT specific (a player might not even choose to have a house in Pleasantview. what then? etc).#So it's just like..uh well...GENERALLY speaking.. everyone is uh.. on a personal quest..vaguely.. which takes place in a Market street full#of shops.. and you are mostly talking to shopkeepers... BUT it's not just a Market Quest since it's also in a fantasy world.. so we need to#give the fantasy world name.. and that's about it. I'm just at a loss for anything else. Maybe the like 2 and a half playtesters I#manage to scrounge up will have better ideas ghhh.. 'Nanyevimi Quest: Get To Know Some Shopkeepers' 'Find A Job In Fantasy World' you could#say 'Market Adventure' but some would argue just having a bunch of conversations and wandering around is not much of a real adventure.#don't want to set people up for thinking there's any drama or combat or anything. 'Do Menial Errands For Mentally Ill Elves Simulator' ghjg#(also sidenote: the '''chibi'' style versions of the characters on the menu screen....EVIL.. that style is SOOO hard for me to draw in for#some reason.. I just can't get the proportions right/have trouble fully ''simplifying'' the design.. took me HOURS lol... aUGHh)
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i will never get over how insane f1 mechanics are. logan's car was on fire and in pieces yesterday and today it's just good as new? and with a floor revision to make it legal? what is this witchcraft.
much respect to the f1 mechanics o7
#f1#zandvoort 2024#dutch gp 2024#as a meche student this is literally my dream job#the amount of organization and teamwork needed to make sure the right amount of hands are working without there being too many#like just the skill in team management to avoid the whole too many cooks in the kitchen while still being the most time efficient#and the mechanics are just that good that they can stay cool using their tools and working around so many people under such immense pressur#i just have so much respect for them
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If you struggle getting out of bed at times and haven't tried a bedside standing rail or grip, I beg you to consider one. I have an adjustable bed, which is hugely helpful, but the grab bar is equally important. When mine broke this year, my partner surprised me with a new one as soon as he could because it makes that much of a difference in my daily life. It is important to find a style that works for you and your bed/bed frame. But please! Try one!
#i need to make a master list of mobility/pain management tools I use daily#but this one really is so important#chronic pain#spoonie
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early sunday six 🌼
tags! @four-white-trees @passthroughtime @phantasy14 @overdevelopedglasses @skysquid22
here's something with kuwana that also has lost judgment spoilers. (i don't remember who has and hasn't played, so excuse the tag😭)
Here he thought when he was disgraced and fired that he wouldn’t have any more parent-teacher interviews. Now they wracked his nerves something fierce, and he had a corpse left afterwards instead of paperwork. Hell of a trade-off, that was. Sometimes third year students used to ask why he decided to become a teacher, and he’d shrugged and given some canned response about how fulfilling it was.
Kuwana’s got another bully’s corpse tucked away in a safe, isolated corner of the world. At least now when parents asked him what he had to gain helping with such an act, he could muster up a little more gusto when he called it fulfilling. Even though most of them gave him a look like he was full of shit, they’d trusted him enough to follow through with it, didn’t they?
#sunday six#posting early so i can focus on other things today 👍#another sunday six another week without making progress on senseific...#sigh... i just haven't been able to sit down and give it the time it needs#but i also just need to write/make other art to Cope so i've been doing more approachable things#senseific takes too much brainpower for it to be an effective tool for managing my anxiety rn#so just trying a lot of different things#even though i really did want to work on senseific the past fortnight.....#anyhow poking at kuwana on his own for once is nice. there's a real edge here i think#on another note. i am anticipating not being able to do sunday six next week bc of plans (/pos) so. don't miss me too much yeah? 👋
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my zatanna is transfem btw
#shes stated as unlabeled in my carrd bc i have my own thoughts on homo magi gender & sex and i cant like...#put all of that into my one-line bio so shes unlabeled (which she'd say herself if u were to ask!) bc its the most accurate to her feelings#but ill always be associating the trans(/fem) flag w/ her bc its also true#need to write that homo magi thing out tho dont i...long sigh.#that means it has to be coherent and i cant end it with “u get me?”.....longer sigh#me saying that is not in anyway implying that ill work on it any time soon whatsoever btw#just take note that i will write my own origin & general identity for the homo magi. it might take canon influences but yeah#giovanni is definitely a man who had homo magi blood in him but was raised in modern society and norms and therefore expectations and such#he worked to wield and harness magic as a tool (while he still appreciated it its different than direct descendants!)#while sindella has a more larger connection and life to magic itself being a direct descendant. love the idea of being made of magic!!#has a natural synchronization with magic/energy/soul/etc and its own way of enlightenment#they had managed to fall in love which is so sweet but they experience the life of magic completely differently!#zee has a natural disconnection from gender norms & such due to sindella but she still GREW UP in modern society w/ gio#homo magis have an innate agenderness to them perchance......idk wtf im saying im high as bawls#either way untuck queen xoxo
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been doing some oc work lately, this was meant to be a test but i’m pretty happy with how it turned out.
#gamma’s art#i’ve been figuring out how to make dragons in this fantasy setting#basically#Ancient Wizard Frankenstein took some dinosaur bones and made a magical creature to sort files in Mesopotamia#but they Life Finds A Way’d and multiplied#centuries later people re-made dragons to help with expanding empires and managing incoming wealth#dragons said ‘i don’t need humans to get a big organized pile of gold’ and went and did their own thing#and they’re made of dinosaurs#anyway i wanted to see how a huge dragon would look with a pterosaur’s beak and ominous lighting. i like it#i scuffed the perspective though so the kid in front seems a lot closer than they are#they’re on a ledge some distance away from the actual dragon.#he’s a BIG boi.#dragon#also my first time using paint tool sai!#MUCH better than photoshop
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witness my vision of what a sexual relationship should have for the very base without going nsfw. my pinky yelled at me for this.
#Spot says stuff#oc tag#shpootlin-doodlin#// suggestive //#its really not but just to make sure#its about wanting to be as close as Possible to each other. its about being the Answer for Yearning. its like a tender hand holding-#-fingers interwining. its about the shared emotional Warmth. its about having the chance to learn how to love yourself through someone-#-elses love for you!!!! sparrows does Not have the best relationship with her body. its a tool it gets jobs done but it isnt pretty.#she doesnt think shes pretty at all. n like this euros gets to prove her wrong because she is the most beautiful person hes ever seen and-#-he needs to tell her all about it. its all ultimately about the Pure Unfiltered Love. its about a sigh teetering on becoming a sob because#-there is just so Much of the adoration for another person that its hard to keep it in. its limitless joy#but also i just. gotta gush a bit about the differences in their body types JUST#EUROS IS SUCH A TWERP... his Big Muscular geef.....#and yet who manages to be the more emotionally stable one. the fuckin metal twig
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Yeah, even I have no idea how that worked But I shall not question it
#nocturne shenanigans#splatoon#splatoon 3#I remember being on autopilot for most of this match#been messin with roller a bit lately and it's been kinda funky#in the sense that I can still use my ambush tactics but I need to set things up differently#I also find it easier to turn my brain off with it#that and I was listening to TOOL at the time and that's dark psychedelic stuff#But I definitely vibe with it so far!#also no I have no idea how they managed to miss me AND IT KEEPS HAPPENING
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Riddle once gave a few of his crosswords to Ace Deuce and Grim as a pastime, hoping to keep them out of trouble.
The group had so much fun that they tried to convince Riddle to share some of his crosswords in an online forum. He refused.
He did start giving people custom-made crosswords as gifts, however. The board game club and housewardens often came together to try solving it.
#twst#riddle rosehearts#let him share his 3000 crosswords with his new friends!#leona enjoys the challenge#kalim uses them as a study tool#amd idia is begging riddle to enter the online forum#“the crossword community needs a revamp asap”#I don't know if I managed to get Idia's speech pattern here...#ace trappola#deuce spade#grim
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Spent a half hour typing a speech about studying in the tags of a post 👍 I'm a normal person who's had a normal time in the academic system
#personal#i'm lying i'm still mad they showed us videos like 'This African Child Walks 4 Hours Per Day for Water. please stop texting in class'#instead of actually like. teaching us helpful tools for studying or time management or whatever#i've done 5 years of higher education on top of middle-school-high-school etc and i had the worst time in hs by Far#partly because i was having a hard time at home but partly because there were teachers there who genuinely thought we were beneath them#and tried to guilt punish and lecture us into being the perfect students they imagined we could be#like it was our fault we were perpetually stressed and tired#the best teachers recognised that teenagers are just people and tried to keep things fair for us without getting too personal#i've found uni to be impersonal at best#but at least full of people who love their subjects and want to share their enthusiasm for it#not necessarily educators and not necessarily enthusiastic about interacting with students#(although certainly there are teachers who are and put a lot of heart into it)#but at the very least: very passionate and able to see the need to tell more ppl about the thing they're passionate about#academia is a hell of its participants' making and once you realise that you have to have compassion for the ppl stuck in it with you
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