#n r fic
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bones-of-a-rabbit · 4 months ago
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what if. readerbot met Eclipse. and Eclipse, who is both Sun and Moon combined, also had both Sun and Moon's collective love for readerbot all stuffed into one big stupid silly baby brain. and what if Eclipse also had absolutely zero self control and immediately turned into a pile of big soft mushy love dovey feelings as soon as he made eye contact w readerbot. and meanwhile readerbot, who has not been clued in on the fact that Sun and Moon are both head over heels for them, was struggling hardcore to process the unstoppable stream of Eclipse's pure unbridled love being beamed directly into their brain with zero filter whatsoever. like what if tho
(eclipse accidentally kills his staffbot spouse by being a teeny tiny little bit too intense, thats what)
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hinamie · 5 months ago
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hi!! I love your art and the jjk atla au has grabbed my brain in Ways That I Cannot Explain. i love them sm. also ty for the inuokko promise, bc trust they are my favorite ship ever (sorry itafushi, you guys are second place). i wish you well in the process and hope that everything goes smoothly for you!!!!
!!! thank u so much I'm happy u like my art and our little passion project <3 <3 <3
also. hm . inuokko u say :>
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pov u look up and u see this ^
jjk atla!au with @philosophiums
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idyllcy · 1 month ago
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class cancelled. see you online - professor!simon riley x professor!reader
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In the early years when he first started, Simon didn't cancel class. It was kind of well known at that point. He'd rather spend the class chattering about his wife than cancel class, so imagine everyone's surprise when he sent out the collective email detailing that he was canceling class because his wife was in labor.
What.
He sent them the slides for the day and a previous recording from a while back, letting them know that class on Thursday would be on zoom — a link that he will post onto the class canvas eventually.
He signs off the email with a photo of the baby locked by a password hidden in the slides, and he replies to everyone's congratulations once you're back in the home. He ends up staying back to teach the rest of the term from home because he was taking care of the baby
It was something briefly mentioned on his rate my professor, detailing how Professor Riley had "Moved the rest of our semester online because he wanted to stay home and take care of his wife. How did the school allow this?" and "I for one loved the online classes and congrats to him for finally being a father — 5/5 for my semester tbh" but truth was while the rate my professors ratted him out, his students didn't mention that class was moved online at the time.
So, when he lets his class know that he'll be out for a couple of weeks and moving class online, everyone sends in their congratulations early, earning a furrow of his brows and a laugh from your lips as he reads his emails to you.
"They really read their RMP reviews huh?"
"Sure did. I didn't even mention it this time. I barely talk about our daughter." He hums, hand on your bump as the second kicks at it.
"Well, I think I walked in once or twice." You hum. "Besides, they like it online."
"I do too." He mumbles, pinching at his daughter's cheeks as she giggles. "But most people don't pick up enough when you teach online."
"That's true." You take the berry from your daughter's hand as she hands one to you and presses another to Simon's lips.
"Thank you, sweetheart."
She nods, eyes glued back onto the screen as you glance at the recent check-up results.
"You bet Johnny's gonna cancel class too?"
"Heard he already told his students."
"Crazy."
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scarlethexelove · 1 month ago
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Only Ours
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𝑃𝑎𝑖𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔: 𝐴𝑙𝑝ℎ𝑎!𝑊𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑎𝑁𝑎𝑡 𝑥 𝑂𝑚𝑒𝑔𝑎!𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟
𝑊𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝐶𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡: 3295
𝑊𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠: 𝑆𝑚𝑢𝑡, 𝑆𝑜𝑓𝑡 𝑆𝑒𝑥, 𝑃 𝑖𝑛 𝑉, 𝐾𝑛𝑜𝑡𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔, 𝑁𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑦!𝑁𝑎𝑡, 𝐴 𝑏𝑖𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑔𝑛𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑦 𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑘 (𝑁𝑎𝑡), 𝐵𝑜𝑛𝑑𝑎𝑔𝑒 (𝑁𝑎𝑡), 𝐺𝑎𝑔 (𝑁𝑎𝑡), 𝐶𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚𝑝𝑖𝑒, 𝐶𝑢𝑚 𝑒𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔, 𝐿𝑜𝑡𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑠𝑚𝑢𝑡, 𝑂𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑢𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛, 𝐻𝑢𝑚𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑏𝑒𝑑, 𝑆𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔, 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑏𝑎𝑏𝑙𝑦 𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑐𝑎𝑛'𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑘.
𝑃𝑡 1
𝐴/𝑛: 𝐻𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑖𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑤𝑎𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑃𝑡 2 𝑜𝑓 𝑂𝑢𝑟 𝑂𝑚𝑒𝑔𝑎. 𝐴𝑐𝑡𝑢𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑛𝑜 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑎𝑠𝑘𝑒𝑑 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑖𝑡 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑑𝑜 𝑖𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑖𝑡 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑘𝑒𝑑 𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑡 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝐾𝑖𝑛𝑘𝑡𝑜𝑏𝑒𝑟. 𝑃𝑜𝑜𝑟 𝑁𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑦 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜 𝑤𝑎𝑖𝑡 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑛, 𝐼 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑒 𝑖𝑡 𝑖𝑠 𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜𝑜 𝑒𝑥𝑡𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑒. 𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝐼 ℎ𝑜𝑝𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑒𝑛𝑗𝑜𝑦 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝐼 ℎ𝑎𝑑 𝑠𝑜 𝑚𝑢𝑐ℎ 𝑓𝑢𝑛 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠. 𝐼𝑡 𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑓 𝑔𝑜𝑡 𝑎 𝑙𝑜𝑡 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑛 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑒𝑥𝑝𝑒𝑐𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑎𝑚𝑒 ��𝑖𝑚𝑒 𝐼 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑖𝑡 𝑚𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑏𝑒 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔. 𝐵𝑢𝑡 𝑝𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒 𝑒𝑛𝑗𝑜𝑦.
NO ONE IS PERMITTED TO STEAL, COPY, OR REBLOG MY WORK AS THEIR OWN
The morning sun filters in through the crack in the curtains. You can feel as a breath tickles the back of your neck. Slowly you blink your eyes open. The arms wrapped around you tighten as you're pulled in closer. “Good morning dorogaya.” Nat’s morning voice deep with sleep whispers in your ear. You can’t help the smile that spreads across your face. 
“Mmm morning Natty.” You mumble your hands moving to Nat’s. Her hands caressing your pregnant belly. Since she found out that you’re pregnant with hers and Wanda’s pups she has been absolutely obsessed with your belly. None of you expected that after your first heat with the alphas that you would become pregnant. Nonetheless you’re all excited to grow the pack and your family. 
Wanda was sent on an early morning mission leaving just the two of you. So as you lay in bed, the closeness of your other alpha brings a calmness to the room. You look at the clock on the bedside table and see that it’s nearly 9am. “Shit.” You move to try and get out of Nat’s hold but her hold tightens on you. You need to get to the bakery. With the pups coming in the future you need to prepare some new staff for your impending leave. “Natty, I need to get up.” 
Nat’s hands caress your swollen stomach more as she nuzzles into your shoulder. “Oh come on detka stay in bed with me.” You feel her hands wandering more and can tell her desire is growing. She moves a hand to grope at your breasts and a breathy moan tumbles from your lips. “I know you want to stay mega.” She mumbles against your shoulder. 
“Natty, I really have to get ready.” Your words come out as a whine. Nat pinches your nipple between her fingers. You’re breathing quickens as you push back against her. You can already feel as her cock hardens. “I-I ha-have to train new me-mega’s.” You can’t help but stutter out. Her menstrations on your body make it hard to deny the alpha. 
The hand that once was on your stomach trails down slipping into the panties you are wearing. Nat’s fingers swiping at your folds. “Oh mega do you need your alpha? Hmm need my cock in your needy hole?” Nat grinds against your ass as her fingers slip between your folds. “Oh so wet for me.” You let out a whine as your resolve crumbles. 
“Please Natty, I need you.” Nat smirks against the skin of your neck. She moves her hand back up to the waistband of your panties. She pushes them down around your thighs just giving her enough access before pushing her boxers down. Her hardened cock slapping against your ass. You grind back against her causing a moan to fall from the alpha’s lips. 
Nat lifts your leg slightly as she lines herself up with your entrance. She slowly pushes in until she is fully sheathed inside of you,  both of you letting out a groan. “Fuck still so tight mega. Perfect for my cock.” You push back grinding against her eliciting a moan from the alpha. She starts to slowly thrust her cock in and out as you push back to meet her thrust. Her hands start to wander your body lifting up the large shirt you slept in. Her hands cupping your perk breast in her hands. Fingers pinching your pebbled peaks. Moans tumbling from your lips. 
As Nat thrust her hips into yours, both of your moans fill the room. You can feel as her knot begins to form slamming against your entrance with every thrust. Every thrust angled perfectly to hit that spot deep inside of you. “Mm-Mmm fuck. Fe-Feels so good.” You stutter out. Nat lazily places kisses on your shoulder and neck. One of your hands moving behind you and gripping onto Nat’s ass. 
“So beautiful carrying our pups. Most perfect omega for your alphas.” Nat pants behind you as both of your orgasms grow. Her knot desperate to slip in and fill you. Your walls clamping around her length just as desperate to be filled. “Gonna fill you up detka. Having you leaking my seed all day.” Nat mumbles her thrust sloppy. 
With a few more thrust Nat’s knot slips in a loud moan ripped from your throat. Your orgasm crashing over you as white hot spurts of cum paint your walls. Your walls are suffocating her cock and milking her dry. Your nails dig into her ass causing her to moan against the skin of your neck as your juices coat her cock. “So good for me.” Nat mumbles grinding against you to prolong both of your orgasms. “Good girl.” 
You're both panting as Nat comes to a stop. Locked together until her knot goes down. Her hands glide back down to caress your stomach. You move to lace your fingers with hers content on your current position. “Fuck that was so good.” You're still breathing heavily as you press back into her wanting to be closer. 
Nat chuckles at you. “Just a little bit ago you wanted to get out of bed.” She teases and you sigh. 
“Sadly I still have to go to Natty. I don’t have a whole lot of time before the twins come.” You counter. You don’t want to leave this bed but you know you have to. You have too much to do before the pups come. 
When Nat’s knot finally goes down you let her slip out of you as you crawl out of bed. Your panties are still around your tights. You go to take them off but Nat clicks her tongue causing you to stop. You look at her with curiosity. “Put them back on detka.” Her voice is low as she watches you hesitate.
“Natty, I need to go clean up before work.” Your words almost come out a whine as you question what the alpha could want. But of course Nat has a thought. One that you might not be so fond of. 
Nat gets up stalking closer to you, she towers over you as you look up to her. She grabs your hips and pulls you closer. You can feel her cum is leaking out of you. “Mega pull up your panties.” You don’t argue as you do what she says. “I want you to feel as my cum leaks out of you for the rest of the day. The way it’s kept right there making you all needy for me when you get home.” 
You let out a whine. “But Natty. What if others can smell it.”
Nat shushes you as she sees the desperation in your eyes. “Good.” She growls. “That lets them all know that you are mine.” You feel a shiver down your spine at her possessiveness but it’s so hot. You nod and pull them all the way up, looking up at her for approval. “Good girl.”
You go and get ready for the rest of your day. You know it is going to be long but it’s what needs to be done. You come into the kitchen where Nat has coffee in her hand and a lunch packed for you on the counter. You smile at the gesture. “Will Wands be home tonight?” You ask.
“She should be home in a couple of hours detka.” Nat rounds the counter and comes over to you, mug still in hand. She leans down kissing you cheek. “Have a good day.” Her voice gets low and sultry as a shiver runs up your spine. She smirks seeing the reaction. “You smell devine mega.” 
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Your feet and body ache as you make your way in the door. Dropping your bags vowing to pick them up later. You close your eyes as you take some deep breaths. “Welcome home malyshka.” Wanda’s voice fills your ears. Your eyes snap open, spotting your other alpha walking towards you with a smirk on her face. That can’t be good, you think to yourself. Especially when you’re normally greeted with a wide smile. She makes it to you, wrapping her arms around your waist. “How are you feeling sweetheart?” One of her hands moves to caress your stomach. “How are the pups?” 
A wide smile spreads across your face. “We are all good.”
Wanda nods. “That’s good malyshka.” You lean into her embrace feeling all the tension in your body melting away. You bury your face in the crook of her neck, and she kisses the top of your head. “You smell delicious mega.” She mumbles. You pull away a shocked look on your face. “Natty told me all about your morning together. Bedroom now sweet girl. It’s my turn now.” You nod and make your way quickly to the bedroom. 
You swing the door open but the sight in front of you has you frozen in your tracks. Nat sits in a chair in the middle of the room facing the bed. Her body is naked and tied down to the chair. Ropes wrapped around her arms and legs keeping them flush against the chair. Her boxers from this morning is being used as a gag and her cock painfully hard leaking precum. Her cheeks are tear stained as her eyes meet yours. 
Wanda comes up behind you placing her hands on your hips. She slowly walks the both of you into the room and kicks the door shut. “Like what you see detka?” Wanda whispers in your ear. You nod feeling heat pull in your lower abdomen. “Natty’s poor little mind showed how desperate she was for you mega. How she made our sweet girl late for work.” She hums in your ear. Her hand traveling down and slipping into your pants and then your panties. Her fingers explore you as you gasp. “Our poor omega. Natty left you just leaking all day long. Making sure that you were all desperate for her cock again. Let's show our alpha what being desperate really is like. Hmm sweet girl, how does that sound?” She turns you around kissing you harshly. You can’t help but moan into her mouth which she gladly swallows. “You’re going to ride me.” She mumbles against your lips as you feel the cold air on your heated skin. Your nipples pebbling to harden peaks from the unexpected cold air. You can see as the red dissipates around you, knowing that Wanda used her magic. 
Wanda pulls away walking to the bed. She positions herself in the middle, arms spread out with a cocky smirk on her face. Her cock standing tall and proud, precum leaking down from her tip. She beckons you over which you hastily move to. Climbing on the best you start to position yourself facing her. She clicks her tongue. “Face Natasha detka. You’re going to put on a show.” 
You nod. “Yes Wands.” You murmur as you turn around locking eyes with Nat. You can see her hips twitch watching you. Your naked form makes her inner alpha go wild, desperate to get ahold of you.  Wanda’s hands go to your hips and helps line you up to her cock. You slowly sink down on her. Your wetness combines with Nat’s cum making it easy for Wanda to slide in. “F-Fuck.” You gasp when your ass meets her thighs. 
Though Wanda is normally able to maintain control it already starts to falter. The way your walls squeeze her tight, Nat’s desperate tear stained face looking onto the scene. How her hips slightly jerks, desperate for some relief. Wanda can’t contain herself as she starts pulling you up before pulling you back down on her cock. She thrust up to meet you. 
You start to help bounce yourself on Wanda’s cock. Breathy moans escaping your lips as she fills you perfectly. Your desperation being sated as your alpha fills you. “Look at that Natty, our omega bouncing on my cock. She’s so desperate to be filled by me.” Her fingers dig into your hips. Nat starts to hump the air looking for some kind of friction, some relief. But she doesn’t find any as her eyes are trained on you. The way your breast bounce with every thrust of Wanda’s hips. How you look so beautiful with your swollen belly, pregnant with their pups. You can see the desperation in her eyes. “Detka, look how pathetic and desperate your alpha is. Her poor cock just wanting to fill you up but instead she gets to try and fuck the air while you ride my sweet cock.”
Your head falls back on Wanda’s shoulder as she thrusts up faster into you. She kisses and sucks reddish purple marks on your skin. Her fingers digging into the soft flesh of your hips. “F-Fuck Wands so-so good.” You stutter out. The faster you bounce the harder Wanda thrust up into you. You’re already so close to cumming and Wanda’s knot hasn’t even formed yet. “Pl-Please.” 
“Aww poor omega are you already ready to cum. Hmm you want to show Natty how good I fuck you.” You frantically nod at Wanda’s words. “Go on malyshka cum all over my cock.” With another thrust Wanda hits perfectly inside of you sending you over the edge. You cum coating her cock as your walls squeeze her. Your mouth opens in a silent moan and your legs tremble. But Wanda doesn’t stop there, her thrust never faltering, riding you through your first orgasm and pushing you towards another. 
Wanda’s knot finally starts to form from the way your walls suffocate her cock. The only sounds leaving your lips now are whimpers and moans. She is sending you quickly to another orgasm. “Detka look at Natty.” Wanda commands you. You snap your head back up. Your eyes raking over the form of your other alpha. You don’t know how but her cock looks even harder than before. The tip red and precum leaking all the way down her shaft. She continues humping the air wishing that you were on her cock. The tears of desperation are still falling. “Poor little Natty.” Wanda mumbles. 
You gasp as a particularly hard thrust from Wanda. Nat watching how Wanda’s cock disappears into you. How her knot is growing and slamming against your entrance. Your legs tremble on either side of Wanda’s. You're both so close. 
With another hard thrust Wanda’s knot slips into place. Your walls sucking her in as a low moan escaped her lips. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, take it. Take all my cum mega.” She ruts up into you and sends you over the edge. You cry out as your legs tremble and you cum harder than you think you ever have. Your walls desperately sucking Wanda in and milking her. You grind down as you ride out your high before slumping back into her. She wraps her arms around you and nuzzles your neck. “Good girl.” Wanda mumbles as you both pant hard. You close your eyes, relishing in the moment as you wait for Wanda’s knot to go down. 
What you don’t realize is that Wanda has released Nat from her confines; a silent conversation having happened as you try and recover. Nat stalks towards the bed, your eyes snapping open when you feel the bed dip. Your eyes meeting the desperate alpha. Wanda hooks her legs around yours keeping you spread open. Confusion crosses your face until Nat lays down between your legs. You let out a whine. “Sensitive.” But neither alpha listens. They know that if anything becomes too much that you have a safe word. 
Nat’s lips wrap around your clit and sucks harshley. You try to close your legs but Wanda uses her to keep them open. You then try to reach down and push Nat away and once again Wanda stops you. You whine out as Nat’s teeth scrape against your bundle of nerves. “Shhh detka let Natty have a turn she was so good. Can you do that for me?” Wanda’s tone is sweet. 
Nat swirls her tongue around causing you to buck your hips into her face. The pleasure bordering on pain. Wanda’s knot is still locking you together but that doesn’t stop the alpha. Nat moves her tongue down. Licking up your combined juices that escape. Her tongue starts to swirl around your entrance where you and Wanda are combined. The feeling makes you squirm. 
But then Nat does something you didn’t expect. She starts to push her tongue in beside Wanda’s cock. The feeling becomes overwhelming the more she pushes in. You whine as you're somehow able to release one of your hands from Wanda and grip Natasha’s hair. She lets out a moan as you tug, a burning sensation spreads throughout her scalp, but she doesn’t stop pushing her tongue in, the taste of your combined cum has her acting like a starved woman.
You tug her hair harder as you moan loudly. Wanda lets your other hand go as her hands find a place on your breast. She massages them and tweaks your nipples between her fingers. Nat’s hips move against the bed as she tries to get herself off. The friction of the bed and hearing your moans has her on the edge. Her knot growing despite not being inside of you. 
Though you're overstimulated you continue to grind into Nat’s face. The both of you are growing close to your release. Nat moans as her hips stutter against the bed. The vibrations send a shock of pleasure through you. Her nose presses perfectly against your clit. With a hard push of her tongue inside of you, your orgasm washes over you. You pull harshly at Nat's hair as your whole body trembles. An even more powerful orgasm shoots through you than before. “Ah-Ahhh.” You cry out your head falling back on Wanda’s shoulder. Your walls pulsing around Wanda’s length. The way your walls squeeze her knot has a few extra ropes of cum coating your insides, an unexpected orgasm for the alpha. Nat feeling you and Wanda cum against her lips has her cumming against the bed. Her hips grinding into the mattress with overwhelming pleasure. 
Nat still continues trying to lick you clean as you come down from your high. The pleasure now morphing into pain has you pushing her head away. This time she lets you, leaning her head against your still shaking thigh. She places kisses on the soft flesh. You’re panting harder than before, your body feeling absolutely exhausted. 
“Are you both okay?” Wanda asks behind you. One hand gently caressing your stomach the other running her fingers through Nat’s hair soothing her scalp. You let out a hmm along with Nat. “Are you sure? I didn’t take it too far?” You can hear the concern in Wanda’s voice.
You turn your head and kiss Wanda’s cheek. “I’m okay. Albeit a little sore.” You nuzzle her cheek letting her know that everything is fine. That you’re fine. 
“Never better.” Nat takes Wanda’s hand in hers and gently kisses it. “That was pretty hot.” Nat’s words has you all laughing. The room grows silent as you all calm down, waiting to finally be able to move again when Wanda’s knot goes down. Nat staying between your legs, her head on your thigh keeping you grounded to both women. 
When Wanda’s knot finally goes down she lets herself slip out of your abused hole. Both women are mesmerized as your combined cums leak out. It takes everything in them not to fill you up again but they know they need to let you rest. 
“Come on let’s get you two cleaned up.” Wanda hums. A perfect ending to a perfect night.
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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 10 months ago
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I DREAM, NOW, OF A NORMAL LIFE WITH YOU ; SUGURU GETO
synopsis; suguru isn’t a lightweight. this is your first time actually seeing him drunk — though maybe it shouldn’t come as a surprise that he’d be the sappy kind.
word count; 9.4k (..... i got carried away ok)
contents; suguru geto/reader, gn!reader (shoko calls u "girl" but in a "girl help" way not a gendered way), written w a no curses au in mind, sugu is a sappy emotional drunk i said what i said, sickening amounts of fluff, depictions of intoxication, reader is averse to alcohol, sugu wants to marry u so bad it makes him look silly, lots of emotions & lots of love <33
a/n; this fic has been ROTTING in my drafts for the longest time but its super precious to me and now i finally get to post it!! @softgirlgonehaywire & @hayakawalove ily ty for being interested in sappy!sugu this is a treat for u <33
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the bar isn’t all that far off from your apartment.
it’s a short distance, really. walk straight ahead, until you reach the record store that suguru likes to frequent, and then take a right; a minute or two uphill, and then you’ll be able to see the blue of the sea. once you’re there, all that’s left is to look for mellow golden lighting and descend a set of stairs.
which is what you’re currently doing, popsicle in hand, loose clothes and comfortable shoes on as you wallow in the mellow summer evening. everything is blue — the dark shade of the sky, and your ice pop, pastel and sweet, tasting of pure youth. the hoodie you threw on is a rich cobalt, suguru’s in name but yours in spirit. he only wears it when you complain that it doesn’t smell like him anymore.
humming a jolly tune, you take a sharp turn, allowing the summer sensations to curl around your subconscious. blissed out and content. 
you were so, so bored — stuck at home with no one to keep you company, no one to mumble snarky commentary about the show playing on tv, no one to run their fingers through your hair while your head rests in their lap. pure torture, really, being faced with the consequences of your own actions. after you stupidly told suguru you’d be okay on your own.
he even asked you twice, just to be sure, even told you that he’d prefer you to join him on his night out. and again, you declined; because it’s been so long since he had some time alone with shoko and satoru, and you were feeling a little tired anyways. 
so he gave in. heading out, with a promise to bring back a tub of your favorite ice cream, leaving you with the apartment to yourself. did you come to regret your little white lie? maybe. possibly.
but everything worked out in the end.
a pleasant breeze caresses your skin, brushing against the apple of your cheek, and you watch as peach blossoms dance in a faraway park. cicadas cling to every tree in sight, buzzing a pleasant tune, mingling with the giddy giggles of high school students enjoying their summer vacation. it’s been raining for a couple of days; you can still smell it in the air, feel it in the low tinge of humidity clinging to your skin, still hear suguru’s insistence that you bring an umbrella with you to work — just in case.
but today, the skies were clear, and it’s late, not too humid but not too chilly. and the stars are out, glimmering in that fuzzy sea of mellow cerulean, leaking out like little marbles cast into space. falling down, down, down, close enough for you to see. from here, it looks as if they’re waving. you resist the urge to wave back.
peace. bliss. a nostalgia so vibrant you could drown in it, feel it lick at your ankles like soft sea foam.
eager to scratch a certain itch in your brain, attention span zipping from one street vendor to the pop music blasting from a couple streets away, you take your phone out from your pocket. absently scrolling through your messages, until you get to the ones shoko sent you just ten minutes ago. the ones that brought you out here, into a summer evening soon to slip into nightfall, ones that have you walking to the bar you chose not to join them at.
messages that still have you pushing back a bout of giggles, chewing lazily on your ramune ice pop with a giddy smile.
sho 🚬: come get ur man sho 🚬: he’s drunk. sho 🚬: like DRUNK drunk 
you: …… um.  you: what happened to hi? hello?? good evening???
sho 🚬: no time for that. look sho 🚬: [ image ] sho 🚬: he looks so goofy lol
unable to resist the temptation, you press the pad of your finger against the screen — opening the image attachment, just to drink in the sight once again. what you see is a certain man, slumped over in his seat, cheek smooshed against the wooden table in front of him. messy hair, no longer tied into a bun, cascading down his shoulders and back. from the little you can see of his face, his skin is flushed a light pink, and his eyes are closed, fingers still curled around an empty beer jug. 
like a sleepy puppy.
a coo tiptoes on your tongue, but you bite down on your lip in an effort to stop it, just grinning at your screen with pure adoration in your lovesick eyes. 
he’s drunk, alright. an unfamiliar sight, but not at all unwelcome. because he’s cute, terribly so, so cute that it hurts, even when he’s obviously wasted. it’s almost funny — you know their drinking habits. shoko holds her liquor so well that it’s a little horrifying, and satoru can get wasted if he has more than a sip of it. and suguru?
suguru never gets drunk. he barely even drinks. out of consideration for satoru, maybe, or you. probably both. that’s just how he is; you thought he hated fish for years, because he was always so eager to give you the best bites of the sushi rolls you ordered. turns out he was just indulging you.
so, to be frank — the idea of him suddenly being drunk is a little bit of a shocker. but it’s also kind of exciting, in a ridiculous way. new, fun, just what you need when you’re bored out of your mind.
(or maybe you’re just happy to have an excuse to go see him.)
you: NOOOO  you: MY BABY 😭😭😭 you: what did u guys DO to him???
sho 🚬: satoru and him made a bet 😐 you know how they are sho 🚬: he drank like a divorced mother of four ive never seen something so beautiful
you: …. you: have i told you that you’re both terrible
sho 🚬: u love us <33 sho 🚬: anyway he’s been asking me where u are for the past ten minutes pls come i can’t stand him sho 🚬: he’s crying.
you: HUH???????? you: WHY????????????????
sho 🚬: dude i dont know sho 🚬: please come get him he’s being so sappy that satoru’s abt to throw up
you: ???? okok 😭 you: im omw ig??
sho 🚬: girl hurry he just told me he genuinely appreciates my presence in his life 😐
an exhale — laced with deep amusement — drops from your lips and spills into the summer air. it tastes like a memory from long ago.
slipping your phone back into your pocket, you raise your gaze, searching for a glimmer of goldish light. soaking up the scent of the ocean, sparkling on the border of your peripheral. salty and sweet.
no matter how hard you try, all you can think of is that certain someone, waiting for you to pick him up. your mind keeps drifting back to the way his eyes crinkle when he laughs, the way his hair falls over his face when he leans down, the sound he makes when he stretches in the morning.
you want to see him. badly. you want him near, want to feel the familiar warmth of his presence, want to see him smile and laugh and sigh and raise his eyebrow at your antics. 
so there isn’t any time to waste. you’re walking towards that familiar set of stairs before you know it, shoes hitting the asphalt with a mantra of satisfying thuds. 
and when you step in through the opened door, you’re immediately engulfed by a sense of overflowing comfort. mellow, warm lights, the soft buzzing of static from an old radio, low citypop beats trailing through the air. the bartender by the counter gives you a curt nod in greeting, before motioning towards a certain table. it’s over in the corner, covered in beer jugs and fancy glasses, with three beauties seated around it.
satoru notices you first.
a bright grin finds its way onto his face, and he waves you over giddily, happily. barely contained excitement in the motion. shoko’s gaze follows his, flitting over to meet yours — and you think she mouths an oh, thank god, before taking another sip from her glass. she brings a hand up in greeting when you come closer, and you can’t see her smile, but there’s a crinkle to her eyes; a warmth in them that you’d never miss.
”hey, guys.”
”yo!” satoru chirps, beaming in a way that’s so distinctly him it makes you soften. he looks so comfortable in his seat, with a cocktail you know is non-alcoholic and probably too sweet for anyone but him to stomach. giggling to himself, leaning over to poke suguru’s cheek, with a teasing declaration of your chaperone is here! 
and there he is. 
the man you came here for, still slumped over in his seat, unresponsive. not for long. as the lilt of your voice reaches his ears, his eyes flutter open, in a bout of recognition — even in the drunken state he’s in. an immediate sensation of familiarity creeps into his veins, rousing him from his cozy, half-asleep stupor. 
he doesn’t even grumble over the way satoru keeps poking at his cheek, interest and attention focused solely on a certain someone. you, your presence. 
and when your eyes meet his, he lights up.
it’s precious, you think, how his eyes widen, blooming with genuine affection, so endearing you could kiss him right then and there. his face is flushed, and his hair is tousled, and the warm lighting of the bar paints him in a golden hue. so perfect for him, your star in the sky. 
a smile spreads across his lips, big and happy and warm, and you can’t help but mirror it. 
(gosh, he’s cute.)
with a dizzy kind of eagerness, suguru sits up, palms flush against the table to support his weight. he stumbles out of his seat, paying no heed to satoru’s amused huff of careful! or the rattling of fragile glass.
it only takes a few uncoordinated steps for him to reach you, where you haphazardly lean against the wall, watching him amusedly. that delighted smile never leaves his lips, as his arms go to curl around your waist, big and heavy, his jaw finding its rightful place on the curve of your shoulder. 
”baby,” he drawls, fond and affectionate. breathing you in. ”sweetheart. my angel.”
a flustered puff of laughter slips from your lips, stumbling a little under his weight. his voice is syrupy sweet, overflowing with love and adoration, soft in a way that has your knees buckling. a little raspy. murmured right into your ear, sending pleasant shivers down your spine. 
he’s too sweet for you to handle, really, even sweeter than satoru’s overpriced cocktail. and he smells the same as always; a blend between coffee grounds, cigarette smoke and rain, one that never fails to soothe you. even when it’s tangled up with a vague but vivid stench of alcohol, courtesy of the drinking he’s been doing until now. 
you crinkle your nose, but don’t let go of him, nuzzling your cheek against the side of his head. words buzzing with warmth. ”hey, sugu.”
suguru only squeezes you tighter, content to have you in his arms. finally, his world makes sense again. all he can do is bask in your voice, warmth, scent — he’s just so enamored by it all. almost in a trance, heartstrings dancing along to the beat of your presence, your very existence, that appears to him as something almost angelic. soft and familiar, something that feels right at home when it’s tucked into his embrace. where he can keep it safe.
”missed you…” he murmurs, sleepy, smearing an open mouthed kiss against the crook of your neck. ”i love you s’much…”
a chuckle. ”i love you too,” you echo, running a steady hand over his back. your voice is laced with something teasing, but awfully fond. ”you really are drunk, aren’t you?”
”mm…” he only hums, cheek pressed flush against your soft skin. ”’m sorry…” he mumbles, stifling a yawn. he sounds a little guilty, and it makes you want to coo. pull his cheek a little.
instead, you laugh. amusement vowen into the bubbly noise. ”it’s fine, sugu. c’mon — let’s go home, alright?”
at that, satoru visibly reacts, placing his glass on the table with a soft clink before getting up to stretch. he grabs suguru’s discarded jacket, letting it hang off his arm as he walks over to the two of you.
”i’ll help you carry him,” he smiles, always so dependable. so ready to be of service. maybe a little too eager to carry suguru around like a sack of potatoes. 
a smile blooms on your face, and satoru gives you a playful wink. shoko just leans back in her seat, stretching idly. it feels like home with them there.
”i’ll stay here,” she hums, a faint grin tugging at her lips. ”he’s your problem now.”
”got it.” you meet her lidded eyes, sharing an amused look as satoru tries to coax suguru away from you, pulling at his cheek while he whines and clings to the fabric of your clothing.
finally, he relents, and you look back at the table with a grin. ”see you later, sho’.”
a smile is the only response you get, but it’s enough. it’s her, the same as always, still sipping from a glass of expensive whiskey and raising her hand in a silent see you. relaxed and cool, and so very lovely. 
with one arm over satoru’s shoulder and the other clinging to your hoodie, suguru stirs.
”shoko…” he groans, craning his head to look back at her, even as satoru makes a move to leave. ”don’t drink too much. and watch out for strangers…” 
he trails off, blinking drowsily, a protective tone to his voice. worried. awfully like him. neither you nor satoru can resist the chuckle you indulge in, but shoko just rolls her hazel eyes.
”i don’t need to hear that from you,” she scoffs, tinged with amusement and what you’re almost certain is embarrassment. there’s a fondness to her snark, one you’d never miss. 
(shoko will always be shoko. you know that she appreciates suguru’s concern, even if she doesn’t want to show it.)
”alright, c’mon,” satoru quips, slapping suguru’s back with a grin. ”there, there, big guy. let’s get you home, hm?”
just as you suspected, he doesn’t let you help, doing all the heavy lifting on his own. not breaking a single sweat, flaunting his strength as he hoists suguru up the steps — while you do nothing but follow, a light jacket hanging off your arm. 
cold midnight air embraces you, slathering your cheeks with the essence of summer as your shoes meet the asphalt. satoru smiles, a low exhale escaping him, dusting off his hands. ”there we go.”
suguru stumbles towards you, no longer caged in, slumping against your shoulder with a satisfied sigh. blinking slowly, as you link arms, his muddled senses adjusting to the outside world. a pleasantly blue sky, a sun long set, and a string of lamp posts to light up the street ahead of you. artificial fireflies, watching over the town you love so dearly.
you part your lips, and a soft exhale slips out, dripping with fondness. ”thanks, satoru,” you smile, meeting his gaze.
”don’t mention it,” he waves you off, but you know he appreciates it; always eager to be praised. ”can you bring him back by yourself?”
”yeah, we’ll be fine. it’s close, anyway. don’t worry.”
a hum buzzes in his throat, and his cobalt gaze drifts upwards, to bask in the starry sky. a moment passes, and then he’s looking back at you and suguru; a soft and earnest smile playing at his lips. so sincere you want to reach out, cup his cheek, make sure he knows how loved he is.
”i’ll go back to shoko, then,” he chirps. bubbly and graceful, giddy and playful. always so lovely. ”gotta make sure she stays out of trouble.”
a chuckle. you mirror his smile. ”of course.”
and with that, your precious best friend makes a move to return to the bar, taking a decisive step away from you. before he can get too far, though, a certain hand reaches out to hold onto his sleeve — keeping him still.
satoru turns around. blinking once, then twice, in confusion; faced with none other than suguru, still slumped against you. a little out of it, sleepy and disoriented, yawning quietly, but his eyes are as clear as ever. caring and sentimental. 
his gaze cuts to the bone of things. it’s something you’ve grown used to.
”thanks, satoru,” he murmurs, letting go of said man’s shirt. the words that spill from his lips are straightforward, a little tactless, but overflowing with earnest appreciation. ”you’re my best friend.”
a moment passes. the stars burn in silence.
satoru blinks.
then he sighs, with what you know is nothing more than feigned annoyance. masking his embarrassment, the same way shoko did, the same way suguru always does. your repressed, beloved little losers. 
”yeah, yeah. i got it,” he pats suguru’s shoulder, once, twice. not looking at him. ”you’re such a sap, you know that? geez.”
a grin crawls up to rest on your lips, fresh mischief blooming in your eyes. ”not gonna call him your best friend back?” you tease, a soft tilt of your head.
satoru gives you a glare, playful, one you can’t physically see from behind his shades but still somehow sense. ”don’t add fuel to the fire,” he grins, with a halfhearted flick to your forehead.
before you can bicker further, suguru yawns, loudly, closing his eyes and nuzzling into you. you share an amused look with satoru, until he shakes his head fondly.
”take care of him, alright?”
”i will. you guys have fun!”
and at last, satoru turns on his heel, coupled with a smile and a lazy wave. but suguru calls out to him once more, unwilling to part ways without saying his piece. so sentimental, so loving it comes to him like breathing.
”bye-bye, satoru,” he slurs, voice loud enough for the entire street to hear, tired and honest. raising his arm in a lazy wave. ”i love you!”
”go home already!” satoru shouts, descending down the steps with a flush to his cheeks that you’ll tease him for later. his soft laughter is carried away by the breeze, sweet and saccharine.
(satoru will always be satoru. you know that he loves suguru back, even if he doesn’t want to say it out loud.)
with a faint chuckle, melting into the summer air, you tug on suguru’s arm. ”alright,” you chirp, looking up at him. ”let’s go!”
he seems a little more awake now, at least, trying to match your steps. meanwhile, you do what you can to support his weight; he���s stumbling a bit, but you don’t mind. if anything, his weight is a comfort, your arms linked together like a lucky charm. a safe harbour.
suguru is acting kind of like a big puppy, gazing at you with hearts in his eyes. a little meek, clinging to you, trailing after you pliantly. he’s a little dizzy, still, and he needs you to get back home in one piece. it makes you puff out your chest, stand up straighter. makes you feel protective of your 6’2 boyfriend, all toned muscle and broad shoulders, the personification of scary dog privilege. but he needs you right now.
a soft bout of laughter spills into the air, as you try to ignore his heavy stare. it’s impossible, though — so you turn your gaze to meet his own, and he practically glows under the sound of your giggles, that cheeky smile you’re wearing. ”you okay, suguru?”
his eyes soften. silently, he runs a thumb over the knots of your knuckle, smoothing down your skin, thick fingers intertwined with yours. 
he looks deep into your eyes, and a soft hum of affirmation buzzes in his throat. 
”i’m just so happy,” he grins, with a sincerity that has your heart doing flips inside your ribcage. it flutters, flutters, flutters, in the wake of his unbridled joy. it buzzes like it wants to break out.
suguru has this dreamy look on his face, one you can do nothing but admire, painted over with fluorescent moonlight and pure summer bliss. one that reminds you a little of high school rooftops, midnight road trips, what it means to be in love.
you nudge him, softly, with the arm that’s tangled up in his own. tilting your head, teasing words on the tip of your tongue. ”you know, i never took you for a sappy drunk.”
suguru's only response is a cute little mmrn, steps heavy as he leans on you for support. trying his best to carry himself, not wanting to inconvenience you, but it’s just a little tough. especially when he feels this soft, this grateful — this blessed.
a giddy, dreamy smile tugs at his lips. his amber gaze travels up, towards the little pale dots of star clusters all across the night sky, gleaming like milk poured over rich coffee. then he exhales; a soft, blissful little sound. ”i’m so lucky.”
a moment passes, silently. in the distance, cicadas buzz. with a patient smile, you admire him, the reflection of starlight in his eyes. suguru has this forlorn look, etched into his expression, like he’s seeing something that isn’t quite there.
”i have satoru and shoko…” he mumbles, just loud enough for you to hear. as if he’s tasting the words on his tongue, as if he can’t quite believe them himself. that’s how lucky he feels, sometimes.
a nod. ”they love you a bunch, you know?”
(they do. they’re both horrible at saying it out loud, but you know they do. you know that they love suguru, just as much as he loves them, even if none of them are good at putting it into words. perhaps they don’t really even need to, in the first place.)
suguru mirrors the soft nod of your head, bangs falling over his eyes as he does. ”and i love them, too.” his smile grows. ”they’re my best friends.”
absently, you reach a hand out, brushing away the strands of hair obscuring his vision. and suguru stirs, his gaze shifting until it falls on you. like a moth to a flame. there’s something indescribable in his eyes, soft and heavy and tender and true.
”— and i have you.”
a stutter of your heartbeat, a jolt throughout your chest. his stare almost burns, but you can’t avert your gaze — suguru looks positively lovesick. admiring you with a dreamy gaze, as if he can’t believe you’re real. 
he reaches a hand out; cradling your face with one big palm, the rough pads of his fingers smoothing down your skin so very gently. smearing his fondness from your jaw to your cheekbone, so loving your breath hitches in the back of your throat. 
a soft, content sigh spills into the air, like a prayer that doesn’t need any words. his smile is serene.
”my angel.” 
as the words fall, that peaceful smile of his changes shape, shifting into a big, giddy grin. it lights up his whole face. a chuckle leaves his lips, content and delighted. ”i’m the luckiest guy in the world.”
and for a moment, you fear that your heart will stop beating entirely. frozen, listening to the lullaby of your heartbeat resounding in your ears. 
suguru has always been frighteningly good at flustering you — but isn’t this a little unfair? you clear your throat, hoping to regain some composure. it’s tough, though. your words could never measure up to his, could never flow as freely, but they’re honest. wholly and thoroughly. and maybe that’s enough. 
”we’re the luckiest in the world, too, then,” you echo, smiling, words barely above a whisper. willing yourself to meet his gaze. ”since we have you.”
suguru looks into your eyes. there’s starlight inside them, he thinks, shining brightly, gleaming in the dark. with the hazy filter of intoxication clouding his mind, it’s all he can think. you’re his northern star, his lighthouse. his one and only saving grace.
(you’re so, so pretty.)
a pause. after a silent moment, spent etching your features into his retinas, suguru tilts his head. his expression is unreadable.
— he boops your nose.
you blink. once, twice, caught entirely off guard; and suguru giggles. soft, giddy little breaths falling from his lips like marbles, strewn over the sand of a warm beach. his eyes are crinkled at the edges, and his smile is sweet, meeting your surprised gaze with a honeyed coo. ”you’re so cute, baby.”
silence. you look up at him. 
then you sigh, exasperated, more flustered than you’d like to admit. god. okay, he’s really out of it. for some reason, you still thought you could get a good one-liner in, but of course he had to ruin that by being a little tease.
you grab onto his bicep. gaze fixed straight ahead, giving it a tug. your steps are more decisive now, and suguru follows you happily. ”alright, alright. c’mon,” you beckon, slightly gruff. ”we’re almost there.”
when you finally reach the familiar front door of your apartment, you exhale a deep sigh, laced with pure relief. limbs tired from dragging suguru up the stairs, mind muddled and sleepy and senses practically engulfed by a man still clinging to you like his life depends on it.
after fumbling with your keys and hearing the click of the lock, you take a victorious step over the threshold, and a familiar scent greets you. soothing, comforting, a blend between fresh laundry and leftover curry and blooming hydrangeas. filling your senses with a fervent kind of bliss. of course, suguru’s does the same; intimately intertwined with the scent of home. that everlasting, never-changing blend. 
with him clinging to you like this, it’s almost suffocating — but you truly don’t mind. suguru’s warm, and sweet, and being close to him like this makes you feel at peace. his hands rest on your hips, his jaw on your shoulder, and he adamantly refuses to let go of you for even a second. it’d be annoying if he wasn’t so cute, if he wasn’t suguru geto, if you weren’t so horrendously weak for him.
what you don’t know is that suguru has an agenda. one that isn’t just i want to hug the love of my life, although partially that as well. suguru has a plan, one he’s been absentmindedly dreaming of for the past five minutes; he’s a man on a mission.
but he’s patient. always has been, always for you. so he waits, and waits, for you to hang his jacket up, for you to kick your shoes off your feet. and when you’re finally, finally finished, suguru leans in to kiss you.
— you block his mouth with the palm of your hand.
a moment passes. silent, almost tense. in his stupor, suguru’s mind can’t quite seem to comprehend the situation before him; he doesn’t understand why he isn’t pressing a kiss to your lips, right now, why he’s kissing the skin of your palm. he doesn’t understand why you look so troubled, a faint guilt simmering in your eyes. he just doesn’t understand.
all he can do is blink, dumbly, surprised. a question written on his features clear as day. 
”well, it’s just…” you sputter, sheepishly. avoiding his gaze, a little guilty. ”you know. since you’ve been drinking, and all…”
and it hurts, you think. it hurts a lot more than it should. it hurts to reject him, hurts to see the way he deflates at your clarification. like a big kicked puppy. like you just threatened to throw him out into the street.
suguru removes your hand, gently, holding it in his own as he speaks. those amber eyes are downcast, and a soft pout rests on his lips. the sight alone feels like a dagger to your chest.
”but…” he frowns, voice awfully meek. he looks so sad. ”i wanna kiss you…”
a soft sigh leaves your lips, before you can think to hold it in. oh, he’s being so unfair. guilt clings to your mind, an itch you yearn to scratch, and all you want is to kiss his pout away. but you really, really don’t want to kiss his alcohol-soaked lips.
so you settle for the second best option.
”’m sorry, sugu,” you coo, reaching a hand out to cradle his cheek. he leans into your touch, still pouting, and you tug a little at his bottom lip. wasting no time in closing the narrow distance between you.
the kisses you press against his skin are soft. peppering kisses all across his face; ghosting your lips along his jaw, trailing towards his cheekbones, and settling on his forehead. tiny little pecks, wherever you can reach. your voice is soft, muffled into his skin between butterfly kisses. ”tomorrow, okay?” 
and suguru seems to brighten up a little, melting under the contact, exhaling in pure bliss. he fervently returns the treatment, planting open mouthed kisses all over your face, respecting your wishes and avoiding your lips. they’re a little sloppy, but you don’t mind.
it does make you a little flustered, though. with his palms cradling your face, engulfing you, there’s nothing you can do except drown in his affection, the love he showers you with. it tickles — and suguru’s smile only grows, at the sound of your soft giggles. his cheeks are starting to hurt.
the state he’s in is just a little bit hazy. despite his initial dejection, he no longer minds that he can’t feel your lips against his, disappointment warded off by your smile and laughter alone. he thinks you’re so, so cute, and all he wants is to kiss you forever. 
but you have other plans.
and before you know it, you’re both curled up in bed, limbs all tangled up beneath the blankets, bodies pressed together as suguru cages you in. he squeezes you tightly, hugging you close, practically melting into you. usually, it’d be so easy to fall asleep like this. with suguru cradling you, covering your body with his own, warm and safe. he’s like a furnace. 
but right now, it’s a little tough. you’re kept awake by open mouthed, ticklish kisses pressed against your skin, supplied by the love of your life. it’s sweet, but he’s being far too distracting — as soon as your consciousness begins to fade into the fuzzy realm of sleep, he leaves a sloppy kiss against your collarbone, and you’re jolted awake once more. 
”suguuu,” you whine, dragging his name out with childish inclination. ”we need to sleep…”  
”sorry,” he only murmurs, muffled into your skin. he doesn’t stop, though, planting a wet smooch on your cheek, and then another. you squirm a little in his hold, and he emits a shaky breath. ”jus’ love you so much…”
suguru knows that he needs to stop. he knows that both of you need to sleep, that you need to rest up. that he needs to recover from the intoxicated state he’s fully aware that he’s in — but he just can’t seem to follow through with it. every cell in his body burns with a certain desire, a need to shower you in love, and it’s unendurable. with every kiss, every giggle he manages to pull from your lips, suguru’s heart fills up just a little more. 
your presence surrounds him, like a weighted blanket, and he clings to it with a desperation he never knew before you. 
in the midst of his feverish consciousness, you’re all his muddled mind can think about. the way you fit together with him like a puzzle piece, like he was formed in the shape of someone meant to hold you. like you were formed in the shape of his embrace. with you pressed up against him, limbs tangled with his, everything feels so right.
but it’s so overwhelming. 
you’re so, so close, so close he’s practically engulfed by your scent, your touch, everything that makes his heart burn with devotion. it’s beating so viscerally in his ribcage, stirring the protective instinct inside him; he just wants you to stay close, by his side, wants to keep you safe and happy. wants to make you feel loved. 
suguru’s heart feels wet and raw and bare, fully exposed for you to see. beating just for you.
with the alcohol inside his veins, and the nostalgia of the summer evening on his mind, everything weighs on him just a little too heavily. everything feels just a little too much. every sensation, every emotion, every sappy thought. all of it together is almost too much for him to handle.
all he can think of is you. how lucky he is, to have met you, to have gotten to know you. how much you’ve changed him, changed him for the better, how much of him is directly tied to your existence.
suguru never truly appreciated his name until you came into his life. it was always no more than a simple fact, a gift from his parents that he hadn’t asked for. something natural, that he didn’t question, didn’t think about. 
but you say his name with such warmth.
he wants to hear you say it, over and over again, forever. suguru — in that sweet, lovely voice of yours. better yet, just sugu, a cutesy, silly nickname he could never bring himself to actually hate. he just wants to hear you call out to him, with that warmth of yours, the one that never fails to soothe him. no matter how tired he is, how stressed. how much everything else weighs down on him. 
at the end of the day, he’s simply your sugu. and that’s all he ever really wants to be.
with a hazy filter clouding his senses, coaxing him into closing his eyes, suguru should give in. he should fall asleep, let you fall asleep. but he can’t bring himself to stop thinking about it; he just loves you so wholly. who you are, what you do. as an equal, an individual, a little galaxy tucked into a body made of flesh and blood. no matter what you’re doing, no matter where you are. 
and right now, you’re here, with him. curled up in bed, in your shared apartment, inhaling the same air, exhaling at the same time. by his side, when you could be anywhere else in the world.
his heart is yours. that’s all suguru can bring himself to think, the only coherent thought he can cling to and echo in his head. his heart is yours. forever and ever. 
he makes no attempt to stop the tears from pooling in his eyes, even as he feels them cling to his lashes, even as his breathing clogs up in the back of his throat. they’re proof of his devotion, his carefully nurtured love. growing over the years, into something almost sacred, a kind of faith. something so fervent he wouldn’t dare deny himself of feeling it.
he can’t hold in a faint sniffle, either, just barely audible. one that breaks your heart in two. it aches, aches, aches. suguru is gazing at you with glassy eyes, a sight you aren’t used to seeing — but he also looks so genuinely glad. his tears aren’t ones of sadness. you know, because you know him. 
”aw, honey…” you coo, the pads of your fingers reaching out to cradle his cheek. despite your efforts, your voice wavers when you speak, little more than a whisper. ”don’t cry... you’ll make me cry, too.”
suguru places his larger palm over yours, choking on another sniffle. the sight renders you completely helpless — you want so desperately to stop his tears from falling, but a part of you is too touched to speak. too mesmerized by how beautiful he is, translucent tears illuminated by softly flickering moonrays, lashes glimmering like shooting stars.
all you can do is smooth a thumb right under his eye, wiping away a stray tear with enough tenderness to stitch his heart back together. suguru emits a shaky breath.
”’m sorry,” he sniffles, closing his eyes. nuzzling into the crook of your neck. ”i’m just so happy… love you so much… you mean so, so much to me, i…”
an exhale, a little breathless, tears soaking through the material of the shirt you’re wearing. his shirt. that realization makes him cry even more, a shuddering breath that shatters like glass when it drops from his tongue. 
and then, in a voice so quiet you barely hear it, a soft whisper worth a million words:
”i don’t know what i’d do without you.”
and it hurts. your heart aches so sincerely, thorns curling around your ribcage, because suguru is crying, and he’s telling you all this. with such an honest intonation that you don’t dare doubt him, even for a second. heavy thumps of blood rush through your veins; he’s still clinging to you, sniffling into your neck, and you’re so in love with him that you almost can’t comprehend it.
all you can do is press a kiss to his shoulder, chaste and tender, and hug him just a little tighter. echoing his words, in earnest, desperately trying to keep your voice from breaking apart. ”i love you, too. more than anything.” a sigh, full of wonder. little butterfly kisses scattered across the expanse of his neck. ”you mean the world to me. honestly.”
with a smile against his skin, you hope so tenderly that the soft kisses will comfort him, will stop the tears from falling. 
”my sweet boy,” you murmur, lovingly, because he is. the sweetest boy you’ll ever know. suguru shudders when you press your lips against his jaw. ”i’m so, so lucky.”
with the combined efforts of your kisses, the alcohol slumbering inside his veins, and the tears running down his cheeks, suguru begins to feel awfully tired. sinking into sleep’s embrace, like a sailor lost at sea. comforted by the glimmer of a lighthouse, just out of reach.
everything feels right. he’s safe, and happy, and in love. so hopelessly, blissfully in love.
the exhaustion creeps up on him, tidal waves embracing a shore, beckoning him into closing his weary eyes. a yawn leaves his lips, and he shifts a little in your hold. you’re smoothing down the back of his head, almost protectively, and sleep is only a flicker away for the both of you. with the last of his strength, suguru snuggles just a little further into you, nose pressed up against your neck, close enough that he feels the flutter of your heartbeat. 
”wanna be with you forever,” he murmurs, sleepily, stifling another bout of yawns. his smile is sweet and dreamy. ”gonna marry you one day…”
a moment passes.
for a second, you think your heart does actually cease beating entirely.
swallowing a gulp, you allow yourself the luxury of an inhale — and fresh air fills your lungs. grounding. all you can hear is the rapid beating of your own heart, heavy thumps reverberating in your ears. warmth flows through your entire body.
marry.
the word is spoken so casually, so sincerely, as if he’s said it countless times before. as if he’s repeated it, over and over again in his mind, just to get used to the idea. as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. marriage. something so foreign, so scary, enough to send shivers down every narrow of your skeleton. such a large step to take. 
(but suguru says it with such tenderness.)
”… okay,” you whisper, at last. breathless. ”i’ll be waiting, then.”
there’s nothing else to say. you don’t know if suguru is even conscious enough to hear you, let alone understand the full weight of your words, of his own words. but you don’t mind. 
a soft smile lingers on your lips, as you stroke his hair, mind hazy and limbs heavy. nuzzling your cheek against the side of his head, full of affection. dripping from your hands down to the column on his throat, through his windpipe, down to his heart.
”goodnight, sugu.” you press a kiss to his messy hair, tender and chaste. ”i love you.”
an incoherent mutter leaves his lips, in response, one you can’t quite make out — but you don’t need to. because you already know what it means, in the same way you know that the sky is blue.
(an echo buried deep within his subconscious, voiced without effort, as easy as breathing.
i love you, too.)
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the sizzling of a pan and the whirring of a coffee machine form a beautiful morning symphony, bouncing off the walls of your kitchen. to your ears, and your still sleepy brain, it’s a soothing sound — coaxing soft little melodic hums from the depths of your throat.
with such a tantalizing aroma in the air, a blend between espresso and pancake batter, you can’t help but buzz with a mellow, groggy kind of joy.
honestly, you're beginning to understand suguru’s fondness for the morning hours. waking up to his soft snores and content expression was more than enough to give you the energy you needed to get out of bed; all sleepy and relaxed and pretty, with hazy morning sunrays kissing up his bare skin, caressing his messy bedhead. 
a rare sight, awfully precious. a part of you wanted to stay in bed and admire him all morning, but the thought of taking care of him coaxed you into leaving. it’s the least you could do, really — after seeing him so sincere, so open and vulnerable. 
hopefully, his headache won’t be too brutal when he wakes up. you left some hangover pills on the nightstand, courtesy of shoko’s advice: just get him ibuprofen and coffee. works like a charm. are you a little worried about her nonchalance? maybe. but you trust her judgement. they’re a handful, but you love them — even when they’re drunk or hungover. 
which is why you’re standing in the kitchen, engulfed by the morning sunlight, in front of a sizzling pan. trying your very best not to burn the pancakes you’re making, patiently waiting for the coffee to be done. 
in your blissful stupor, caught up with thoughts of suguru and breakfast and forevers, you don’t notice another presence coming up behind you.
two arms wrap around your waist, and a jaw attaches itself to the curve of your shoulder. you startle, a little, jolting at the contact — but then you recognize that telltale scent, the familiar weight of his arms, and immediately melt into the embrace.
suguru breathes out a raspy chuckle, amused at your surprise. 
a sigh slips from your lips, content. ”good morning,” you hum, placing the palm of your hand on his forearm. suguru shifts a little, getting more comfortable as he leans against you. tenderly, not too much weight. he’s delicate like that.
”g’morning,” he rasps, leftover sleep clinging to the syllables. the usual smoothness of his voice is coupled with a deep, rough kind of tilt, one that always accompanies it in the morning. your heartbeat picks up, silently.
suguru smiles. dreamy, giddy, because you just looked so pretty, in the morning light, hair still a tad messy. humming happily, swaying slightly side to side. so irresistible. he’s beginning to understand why you love sleeping in so much; getting to wrap his arms around you like this, instead of the other way around, doesn’t feel bad at all.
he squeezes you just a little tighter, hoping it’ll convey his gratitude. there are holes in his memory, last night no more than a blurry sequence of still images, but some bits and pieces remain intact. he remembers getting drunk in a way he hasn’t since he made that bet with satoru back in high school — and he remembers that you were there to take care of him.
a smile tugs at his lips. a little giddy, butterflies erupting in his chest. he’s so damn lucky.
”thanks for taking care of me yesterday, sweetheart.”
a hum. you smile, sheepishly, patting his arm. ”don’t need to thank me for that. how do you feel?”
suguru smiles. you feel it, against your skin, a chaste kiss on your neck. ”better.”
the low purring of the coffee machine has stopped, but the sizzling of the pan remains. from beyond the opened windows, you can hear the chirping of cicadas, melodic and serene. singing a summery tune. both of you soak in the preciousness of the moment, the fragile silence, before suguru breaks it.
”everything from last night is kinda fuzzy,” he admits, clearing his throat. just a tad sheepish. you simply hum, a low noise of acknowledgement, and he continues. ”i don’t really remember anything… ’m sorry, baby. i hope i didn’t make you uncomfortable.”
your lips curl up into a tiny smile. such a sweetheart — always worrying about you. always so caring and attentive. eager to reassure him, you smooth over the skin of his arm with your thumb. ”not at all.”
then you’re taking a couple steps back, moving from the stove, and suguru follows. you turn yourself around to meet his gaze, his arms still attached to your waist, a comforting weight.
a grin blooms on your lips, a little teasing, and a flicker of mischief shines in your eyes. ”you were cute, you know.”
suguru blinks, before emitting a low chuckle. a raspy little thing. ”was i?” he drawls, as you brush his bangs away from his face. 
”mhm,” you chirp, eyes crinkled as they meet his own. you just can’t help but want to tease him, a little bit. just a smidge. ”kept going on and on about how much you love us.”
hands moving to cup his face, you squeeze his cheeks softly. and suguru lets you, too tired to resist, only giving you a lazy raise of his brow. there’s a sense of amusement in his eyes, and something in you knows he likes the attention. your teasing words buzz with endearment, akin to a purr. ”my sweet lil’ sugu.”
all he does is lean into your touch, allowing himself to melt into the tenderness of the physical contact. even as you pull at his cheek, earning you a very gentle pinch to your side. but he lets you have your fun. you’re warm, and sweet, and he’s so in love with you he’d probably let you tug his body around however you please.
still, your words leave him just slightly perplexed. he’s still smiling with half-lidded eyes when he asks you to elaborate, basking in the feeling of your thumb smoothing over his cheekbone. ”us?”
your grin widens, by a tad, something deeply amused glimmering in the depths of your iris. ”yep,” you answer, popping the p. for some reason, suguru dreads the teasing edge to your voice. ”me, and shoko, and satoru.”
a moment passes. he stiffens, for a second or two, mind processing the words. then he groans, softly, squeezing his eyes shut.
it makes you laugh, soft and amused, and he can’t help but smile along. despite the dreadful realization you present him with. no wonder he was met with so many notifications when he tapped at the screen of his phone — he didn’t read through any of them, but now he’s apprehensive to do so at all. shoko and satoru can be so goddamn obnoxious when they feel as if they have blackmail on him.
he can see it now, in his mind’s eye; shoko nagging him to run her errands, satoru reminding him of his words every time they have a slight disagreement. 
(grab me a coffee. three shots of espresso, one cube of sugar. got it?)
slacker.
(we both know i’m right. don’t be so stubborn, suguru! it’s okay to be wrong sometimes.)
asshole.
(c’mon. you said you loved me, right?
so mean. and here i thought you loved me!)
idiots.
(he does love them. more than anything. even when they’re being absolutely insufferable.)
suguru just sighs, deep and fatigued, already anticipating his doom. ”they’re never gonna let me live it down, are they?”
a giggle slips from your lips, and his heart flutters helplessly. ”probably not. my condolences.”
another sigh. it only makes your smile widen. there’s something awfully delighted, in your eyes, as you cradle his face in your hands. ”well, i thought you were very sweet!”
”yeah, yeah…” he mutters, vaguely amused. placing one of his large palms over your hand, where it rests on his cheek. ”i won’t be doing that again anytime soon.”
a chuckles bubbles up from within your throat. ”aww,” you pout, giving way to a teasing grin. ”that’s a shame. i wanted to hear you talk about how much you love me again.”
suguru blinks. 
then he smiles. a very particular smile, characteristic, one you’ve come to associate solely with him. resting somewhere in the intersection between a soft grin and a teasing smirk. a flicker of mischief shines in his eyes, and you realize your mistake.
you can tease suguru all you want; but he'll always turn the tables on you, at the end of the day.
”oh?” he chuckles, fondly, thumb smoothing over the lines of your hand. his eyes gleam, looking straight into yours, shining with something mildly devilish. ”i don’t need to get drunk to tell you that, baby.”
in a smooth motion, one you can’t help but silently envy, suguru intertwines his fingers with yours and brings your hand to his lips. he never once breaks eye contact, gaze heavy as he basks in your flustered expression, planting a soft kiss against your knuckle. reverent.
”i love you. more than anything,” he purrs, lips still lingering on your skin. warm enough to burn. ”you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
a pause. heat crawls up your spine, and a flush rises to your cheeks. you couldn’t stop it if you tried.
”my everything,” he continues, intent on flustering you as much as humanly possible. voice low and smooth, honeyed and deep, and worst of all; terribly earnest. lips trailing over your knuckles, against every knot, so soft that you barely feel it. ”my entire world.”
”okay, okay!” you sputter, an embarrassed hue to your cheeks, your gaze landing on the windowpane to your right. his stare is just too heavy, too deeply in love. overwhelming. ”point taken. nevermind.”
suguru laughs, genuine and full. warm and amused, deep and real, and you catch yourself thinking that you don’t want to go a single day without hearing it. even if it’s at your own expense.
a coo rests on his the tip of his tongue, but he bites it back, opting to lean forward instead. he trails the pads of his fingers along your jaw, touch like a butterfly, lifting your chin up ever so slightly. then he closes the distance between you. 
in your throat, your breath hitches.
— but he doesn’t kiss you. suguru stops right in front of your lips, so close you can feel his breath on your skin, taking a moment to simply look into your eyes. and despite how flustered the close proximity makes you, you can’t bring yourself to look away. heart fluttering madly, a string of staccatos against your parted ribs.
a tilt of his head. amber eyes gleaming, crinkled and fond. ”can i kiss you, now?” he asks, grinning softly. hand smoothing down your hip, big and warm, teasing. ”i made sure to brush away all the alcohol. or do you still not want to?”
you pause. 
”hey, what happened to not remembering anything?” you pout, narrowing your eyes. the corner of suguru’s bottom lip twitches upwards.
but he only shrugs, feigning nonchalance, a playful glint in his eyes. ”guess i was just that disappointed.”
a giggle flows from your lips. he drinks it in, gazing at you with pure contentment.
”alright, alright... c’mere,” you coo, smile honeyed and sweet. tracing your fingertips along his jaw, brushing a silky strand of hair behind his ear. you take in the sight of him, meeting his lovesick gaze. he squeezes at your hips softly, a little impatient — so you finally lean in.
suguru’s lips are warm, when they meet yours. they taste like sunlight, devoid of any alcoholic flavour, just like he so kindly assured you of. and it’s a little amusing, the thought of him in front of the bathroom sink — desperately scrubbing his teeth, just to get his kissing privileges back. such a dork. 
he’s your dork, though.
suguru sighs into the kiss, smiling giddily, satisfied at last. a sound you can’t help but mirror. he deepens it, ever so slightly, fingers squeezing gently at the plush of your waist. a hum of approval buzzes in your throat, and his smile only grows.
when he pulls away, that smile is all you can see, along with the ever so slight flush to his cheeks. a hint of peach dusting his skin, framed by the sunrays caressing his jaw, highlighting his handsome features. breathtaking. 
before you have a chance to protest, he’s leaning in again, to press one more chaste kiss to your lips. your heartbeat picks up.
everything finally feels just right.
the warmth of the sizzling pan, the fragrance of freshly made coffee and now-burnt pancakes. the light of the morning sun, scattered across the open space of your apartment, splotches of life painting everything in a heavenly glow. the love in the air, all soft and light and comfortable.
domestic bliss. with suguru, who never seems to change, no matter how many years go by. if you could live in this moment for the rest of your life, forever and ever, you’re sure you’d die happy.
and wow, is that a heavy word. forever. 
(but suguru makes it feel so very, very light.)
forever feels a lot more real, like this. cradled in the midst of a drowsy morning, bumping elbows with the man you love most, after getting to take care of him in his most vulnerable state. accepting every part of him, and having him accept you just as fervently. 
just this moment alone is worth far more than you could ever comprehend. 
suguru, with his warm hands, his familiar embrace. your shared laughter, bouncing off the walls of the kitchen as you try in vain to save your scorched pancakes. and his smile, his fervent devotion, coaxing him into eating them even though they’re burnt at the edges and don’t taste even a quarter as good as his. because you made them, for him, and that makes them taste sweeter than anything.
you stare at him, from across the table, admiring the sight you’ve grown so used to; suguru, with his slightly tousled hair, mug in hand and smile painted on his handsome face. drowned in sunlight, pink petals flitting in through the opened window. you don’t want a single day to ever pass without you seeing this. what does that mean, exactly? you think you know. 
it means forever.
(forever, forever, forever. what a pretty word.)
marriage. you think of it, again, let it linger in the depths of your skull, bounce around until you grow just a little more used to it. and it’s a scary thought, for sure. a terrifying thought, even, something so foreign that it makes you nervous. but you truly wouldn’t mind doing this forever — not one bit. not if it’s with him.
and, unbeknownst to you, maybe that promise of forever isn’t all that far off.
maybe it’s only a couple rooms away, hidden within the depths of a certain drawer, until suguru finally gets the courage to bring it out. and maybe, just maybe — that day isn’t all that far off, either.
(suguru smiles at you, from across the table. he thinks you look ethereal, sipping from your morning coffee, blinking tiredly. so sweet and angelic.
all he can think of is forever.)
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cupcakeinat0r · 9 months ago
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A Nerdy middle-aged loser Miguel w a dad bod who teaches your genetics class.
He has a huge crush on you even though he knows he shouldn’t but how tf couldn’t he????
With the way you always walk in a minute or two late, making the whole class look at you as you strut in with your quiet “so sorry!” and your cute little outfits that show off the best parts of your body.
Miguel’s eyes would follow you and the way you set down your bag, whipping out your computer, ready to absorb all the knowledge that Prof. O’Hara has to offer like a sponge. He usually has to stand behind his podium because watching you hang onto every single one of his words with those parted, glossy lips and curious eyes made him embarrassingly hard.
Or the way you took notes, your cute little organization of colors and annotations. Your kindness in giving notes to your peers because you wanted to see everyone succeed. Even though you may not have looked like it, you were a smarty pants, too. And he found that extremely hot.
During his lecture, he’ll sometimes catch you applying lip gloss or fixing your hair in your compact mirror and think to himself how gorgeous you are and how lucky your boyfriend that you totally already have is.
Cuz there’s no way he could pull someone like you. Those days are over for him. Plus, you were way out of his league.
But he can’t help but have a sliver of hope every time you leave class with an adorable smile and small wave.
“Thank you so much, Professor O’Hara! Great class today!!”, your praise never ceasing to make him slightly flustered on the inside.
Before you, he totally fucked his own hand like everyday. He’s a lonesome man. But now that you were in his life? That man goes home everyday, imagining his had is your luscious, tight cunt, replaying your cute voice in his head over and over again.
What he has no idea is that his praise has the same effect on you.
Anytime you had a question or were worried that you weren’t understanding a concept, Miguel would comfort you, with the most gentle words and voice.
He was such a cute man. It’d be so easy to praise him and baby him, telling him he’s sooo smart and such a good teacher.
His well-kept black hair w tiny hints of gray throughout, his black rimmed square glasses, his little cashmere sweater + button up combos that hugged around his broad chest, enormous biceps, and pudgy belly. He was sooo dreamy. He made it so hard to focus.
You’d go up to his desk after class needing clarification on a topic. He’d tell you to sit down, eager to help you with the class (or anything ever, he’d do anything for you if it meant keeping you).
His cologne would fill your nose as he bends over the table, a strand of hair falling on his forehead, pushing his glass up his nose as he towers over you as he explains what ever it was you were confused about.
It never helped because you never caught a single word. You were too busy imagining his soft stomach rubbing against your back as he bends you over the table, plowing you while saying those sweet words of encouragement into your ear.
And those veiny, hairy arms and hands wrapped around your waist as he bounces you on his fat cock, making those adorable glasses of his fog up.
“Don’t worry, sweetie, you’re doing great, as always.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself, sweetheart.”
“I know, mama, It’s a hard concept to grasp, but you’ll get it. I know it.”
It made you scream on the inside. You wanted so badly to be a good student for him so that he could talk to you this way every single class.
Pt.2 here!
Want more DadBod!Miguel ? Here’s my master list, bae!!
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pushingdaisies1 · 3 months ago
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Its never too late baby . . . ♡
(✧ ˚.) PAIRING-> James "Logan" Howlett {A.K.A} Wolverine x Mutant Reader >_<
(✧ ˚.) SUMMARY -> You were always someone who utilized your strengths. Physical and mental, you were a jack of all trades. You were a true hero to the students you taught within the school. Amongst the other X-men, you would always be one of them. But you had this little tick, that always annoyed Logan no doubt. You were a secretive person, too secretive for even his "standards." For others, you were a pillar of nurture and guidance. He saw your well-meaning nature from miles away. It was almost sickening to him how you would stretch your capabilities out to no end. He would never deny that he could be selfish. Sometimes it's more worth it to save your spine, than risk it for someone else. Though with the problems being thrown the team's way as of recent, he always saw you spinning your wheels. You wouldn't reason with him even when he of all people would lend you a shoulder to cry on. Even the students at the school could see it. With their childish snickers and big-eyed looks at your comfortable banter with Mr. Howlett whenever he helped with class. You were in love with the Wolverine. Again, out of all the Canadians - him? It wasn't something like a schoolgirl crush. It was an infatuation sort of deal. You burned for him mind body and soul. You would pretty much follow this scoundrel to the ends of the earth, even the end of your life if prompted. Which causes something to break between you two after you risk your livelihood for your family. The people that made up your heart, including Logan.
(✧ ˚.) AUTHORS NOTE -> hi party people!! I saw so much of the sweet reception for my first ever logan piece , so tysm!! Genuinely from the bottom of my heart the love means so much. As I’m currently going through my x-men marathon time if you will , I’ve had this idea brewing for a while. Thankfully the resurgence of logan content has given me the push needed to formulate this yk! This isn’t a part two to my previous logan post. That will be coming very shortly, but this is its own thing. Timeline wise... erm.... idrk a good place to put this SIGH. I'm thinking like in between x2 and the last stand. also one last final note , the title I took from Chemtrails over the country club. specifically the one lyric - "it's never too late baby so don't give up." felt like an appropriate whimsy title, nd I have been hearing that song everywhere lolz. Anyways, toodles!!! ᐢᗜᐢ (✧ ˚.) CWS (?) -> Descriptions of blood and graphic injury , they/them pronouns for reader !! , mentions of major character deal , Logan cares too much ... which could mean nothing , ur comatose for like the good first chunk of this , Jean and u have LORE!!!!! (not rlly but u and her have backstory beefers/her "passing" affect reader 100%) , mourning/grief, And that's on having no healing powers!! Buh-dun-csh!!
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Your fall from grace was quick on the battlefield. This was supposed to just be any regular mission. You were using it as a way to clear your head after all. But you took a leap too far and now here you were, plummeting. The issue at hand was apprehended, sure. But you didn't leave the fight unscathed. Your vision grew too spotty for you to even make out your surroundings. Your hearing too even started to fog. Looking down, somehow or some way a large-sized piece of shrapnel metal had made it into your torso. Right in the sweet spot that was not in the lungs. Your legs began to wobble, losing your footing slowly but surely. You didn't realize your body was falling to the ground. The warm feeling rushing through you was the blood exiting from your hefty wound. It was ironic the last thing your eyes met before collapsing. Logan turned back around immediately once he noticed you weren't clamoring to the jet. His heart sunk to his stomach as he immediately sprung over to you. By the time your head had smacked against the ground, you went out. Your fingertips began to buzz, your fatigue lifting all of a sudden. All of the hurt and weight on your shoulders lifted? You felt freer than before, with a piece of debree stuck inside of your body no more. Even if some people regarded mutants as the next step in human evolution, a majority were still stuck with fleshy bodies. If only you were made out of steel. In this momentary unconsciousness, you thought about everything that went wrong. Your existence as a whole, joining the school. Moving up from student to teacher at Professor Xavier's school, like Scott and Ororo you were one of the first. Regarded as maybe one of the most useful of the bunch. No one could ever compete with Storm, the literal incarnate of a goddess. You thought of her as your eyes closed, embraced with the warm memories of your early days within the school.
The professor was never one to play favorites among his students. But when he searched you out and arrived with a less conniving Magneto at your door, it was clear you were special to him and his cause. From that day forward you were seen as a pillar of hope to a lot of the students. To some, you were like a mother, to others a guardian who would save them no matter the risk. To Logan Howlett - "The Wolverine", you were a coward. A coward that he admired. A coward he respected due to the ways you handled... stress in the simplest of terms. From the day he met you, he wandered around the halls of the mansion bewildered and confused. Something about you stuck out. He would've done something with this urge sooner if his eyes weren't honed in on another.
From day one you were not surprised how fast he fell and yearned for Jean. The woman you saw as your confidant, your best friend, she was magnificent. Smart and poised all in one with a strong set of mutant abilities. She was on the same power level as the professor, which made sense for their connection.
For living in Jean's shadow, you didn’t hate it. You were her right-hand man. Your balance was comforting, she was like your sister. The professor in small quiet moments of honesty to you liked to compare you to him and Magnus. When times were simpler they weren’t at opposing ends of the mutant kind spectrum. Yours and Jean's dynamic made you feel at ease with yourself. How could you worry? Your identity became a part of hers a long time ago. Logan saw more to that with you. Sure you could nag a lot of the time, and you always barked up his tree whenever he found ways to smoke on school grounds. But you just had this pull for him. He'd always find his way to see you first whenever entering a room. His brash and gritty attitude always got all mushy around you. He over time grew a lot more fond of the smallest details when it came to you. He was an amnesiac, his past only bits and pieces. But you made him feel grounded. You cherished his growth in ways no one else had. You were the reason why he was so drawn to the "now" of life. He needed that in times like this. He couldn't keep up for long after the realization that Jean was gone finally sunk in. Drowning at his one-sided attraction, the longing that he could've done more, you pulled him right out from that rut. Thank god that the two of you combined had horrible sleep schedules. His nightmares still stirred while you were suddenly afflicted with these with the memories of being on that jet when it wouldn't take off. That same pain rocketed through you every night as you were haunted by the sight of Jean finally swept into the oncoming flood. The feeling of grief ricocheted throughout the entire school. But you found your way to stay afloat. It was Logan, which you never thought of yourself admitting. But truth be told it was him. He was the most anchoring thing around you. Ororo distanced herself for the first month, while Scott cracked under the pressure of grief. Late nights dashing around the campus halls to the kitchen, out to the court where you two just talked. You had never seen him talk so much until you two became each other's support. It made you feel better seeing him smile more. Especially when it was at you. Again, you would never utter that truth EVER. At least that's what you thought. But his smile was a nice reminder of all of the light he held inside of him. As much as he despised ... everything, he was still so nurturing in his own ways. Nightmares were an excuse for him to be next to you. Nightmares were his excuse to hold you tight to his chest. The pain of loss was a collective "excuse" between the two of you to just .. be close.
Soon though, this ideal predicament between you both started to crack. Because even though she was dead, you still knew you would always be inferior. It may be all in your head but the hate kept you driven. It kept you driven but also mad. Small things would set you off soon enough. You knew deep down whenever he'd look into your eyes, it was a nice reminder of Jean. Even with how much he denied it when you came to him in tears, your bitter pain and grief clouded your judgment.
Logan saw that even with his help you were still hurting. He didn't want to get involved in it entirely as some of it was your own demon. But he saw how bad your spiraling was and still wouldn't accept his help. Not even from Ororo or Scott, not even the professor. Neither of you would admit who started the argument. It was late, and you were tired from pushing yourself to grade papers. Logan couldn't sleep and wandered his way to your classroom of course. The conversation was fine until he mentioned the problem. Your problem which you didn't want to deal with right now. As you were only running on a few hours of sleep. But even with Logan's usual "take and give no fucks" attitude, he knew he needed to push. You were slowly shutting yourself off this time, and he didn't expect himself to be a part of that mix. It was all a misunderstanding, but the two of you were angry and fire was thrown.
Your shared feelings were complicated. This whole ordeal with him brought out the "worst parts" of your love for him. He too was dealing with his internal dilemma. How could he move on from Jean and you were still latched onto the idea of her? It was a stupid question that was brought up in a Logan way, which of course caused the spat to escalate. His poor mistake was what he shouted. Already with the fear of waking one or even all of the students, you hated what he even dared to utter. "We're friends, you need to calm down about this whole obsession thing bub!" Originally you were thinking of just heading to bed. You were too tired to continue on with this constant bickering. But that's when you exploded on him. You regretted every last word you said to his face. Because it was you speaking your honest truth. About what you felt for him, about your hurt and your pain. How Jean was practically your lifeline. Losing her was like losing a piece of yourself. Especially since you rubbed it in about the kiss he and her shared. That you had seen and that made you sick to your stomach. A couple hours later she was dead. Your heightened emotions make you feel almost dizzy. The more you talked the more you realized his expressions distinct shift. As he was reaching out for you, you immediately swatted his arm askew. He didn't realize he hated to see you cry as much as he did until now. With broken sobs, you ran out of your classroom. The papers once stacked neatly were now laid messily all over your desk. You made sure to keep quiet. What broke your heart even more was a half-awake Rogue you ran into. She looked even more awake seeing your distraught state. Her feet tip-toed against the wooden floors of the hall before she looked at you. A big reason you and Logan were so close too, was because of Rogue. She was a good kid, he always rubbed off on her. He told you everything about how he and Rogue met. You were so enamored hearing him recount even the foggiest of memories. It could even be arguments with Scott he had, you'd just sit there with wide eyes as you listened. His word became your gospel. It warmed you to your core hearing him almost sound like a dad. He had looked out for her from the beginning. You always tried to do the same even when he left for Alklai Lake for answers.
It was so silly when she had practically pushed you and Logan to talk. She was just a kid and you two took up the almost suto role of her protectors. Friend or parent, she too found two trusted people to confide in. So you immediately went into "teacher mode" as soon as she saw you with watery eyes. She looked puzzled when her face met yours. You calmed down her storm of questions as she sputtered on and on. What's wrong? , is something happening? Are you okay? The hug you shared was one of the last meaningful hugs you had with another living being. You practically cradled her in your arms as you helped her calm down. She looked up at you, her larger brown eyes almost like the ones of a puppy. "Please don't be lying to me... y'know ah don't like liars." She whispered softly, her bubbly southern accent quiet. Your heart broke into a couple more pieces as you lied through your teeth. With a content nod, you bidded her a goodnight. Turning back to your room to drown your sorrow in god knows what. It had only been a good couple of months after Jeans' death that a mission arose. The X-men were laying low after everything at the base. For the school's and students' sake. But it was always on time when something bad happened for the team to fix. Old enemies came a-knocking and this time it wasn't Magneto. It was all supposed to be an in-and-out operation. You immediately clamored to get your hands dirty once again. You and Logan hadn't been talking for the last couple of days. Not even meeting in the dead of night to speak to another. You longed to hear about his afternoons subbing with Storm. This was your chance to regain some well-needed level-headedness. The thrill of doing what's right for a better tomorrow always made you feel better The mission even got Scott to come out of his puddle of mourning. Making you feel even better seeing your good friend so triumphant as he quickly clamored for his uniform. You and Logan didn't even brush shoulders as Storm and Scott dashed off to prepare the jet for takeoff. Everything should have gone fine. You should have all made it out alive. Every single one of you, that's what you had planned. Your lapse in judgment will always be your curse. Because now here you were, in the lap of the man that made your stomach churn. That made you feel LIKE that silly schoolgirl feeling you despised. Snapping back to reality, you realize where you are currently laid. Logan's eyes eased from his previous panicked look of fear as he saw you conscious. You were still bleeding but it seems that with quick medical attention either one of them got it to lessen. Your heart raced as you felt the warmness of his hands as they pressed against your cheeks. "Come on, there you go. Just focus on me." He cooed to your heaving chest. In the far back of the jet, you couldn't see Ororo or Scott. What you could see though was the remnants of blood on Logan's suit. He must have carried you off of the rubble and into the X-jet. Your smile was nothing compared to the horrid wince that left you. Finally, after this long moment of ease, the pain set in.
Going down to hold your gut, you shuddered as your vision all of a sudden wavered. You took in a sharp breath as finally, you noticed how in bad shape you were. Red filled your palm as you shuddered. Thankfully Logan noticed you and your shaky breath and immediately gripped your hand. Even in this state, you were currently in, you would always be able to focus on him. "I know, I know it's scary. You got hit pretty bad, but it's okay. Just focus on me and you'll be okay? I have you." He encouraged softly with that comforting rasp in his throat. His eyes were shaken and his lip was firm. Though his mood lightened somewhat because at least now you were awake.
You tried to speak but you were so weak. That same fatigue stung you as you stumbled over your words. He cradled you in his arms as he kept his eyes only on you. Your weary mind still around belittling you, another one of your eerily humane curses. He saw your chest quicken and lip quiver as your eyes began to lull, you were struggling. "Hey .. don't strain yourself - what is it?" He too began to worry as you saw his vulnerability bloom. Finally your chest steady as you took in one big breath of air. You let out the one thing keeping you from slipping back into rest in one huff. "Don't let me die, asshole." The asshole part came out more garbled from you after you coughed out your last words. Your last words before your eyes fell closed. For some reason, your hearing stayed for just a while longer. In and out, you could hear him cursing under his breath. The last thing you hear is Logan's panicked shouting at Scott, "Can this hunk of metal go any faster?!"
Finally, after so much pain, there was quiet. Peace and quiet after your constant heartache. You felt freed from the chains of reality. From birth to now, now seemed like your death. You left your current reality with a bitter-sweet smile as you felt consciousness swarm over you.
You couldn't feel how long you were out. Oh, but Logan could. Six weeks you lay in the infirmary. With some sort of miracle and hope, Ororo was barely able to stabilize you. The team rushed back into the mansion in panic as your wounds were assessed. But no, you couldn't feel the panic that coursed through your loved ones as you lay so peacefully. You didn't know your heart rate was being tracked. You were stable but anyone could guess it'd take you a while to re-reach consciousness. That your accident broke the barely well Scott Summers. But most of all it affected Logan to the core. He felt his world shake under him as he finally realized what had just happened. Something snapped in a man so stuck in his ways. Those words you said to him before you went back down. They were short but in the moment meant so much. Not to mention the fact that even Logan, so careless and free, was guilty. Every time he came back just to see you, he wanted to curl over and into you. Just like how he mourned Jean, he mourned you. Though .. he couldn't because you were technically still here. He may have not noticed it but everyone else could. The lack of your presence hindered him the worst. He missed the way you'd bother him out of the blue during the quiet time around the school. He missed you telling him about your life. He missed the shitty snort you did when you laughed too hard at one of his bad jokes. He missed seeing you happy. He missed seeing you move around. Pestering students for turning in assignments late or cheating. He missed the feel of your lips against his forehead when his nightmares of Jean flared up. He missed the way you looked at him. The way you saw him not only as a man but as himself. He didn't know how to admit it but he.. missed you. He missed you so bad and it was eating away at him. He spent hours out of his day visiting you. Like what you two always did when you were alone, he talked. About his day, what he ate, and even the lessons he overheard. The school got even quieter with you gone and he hated it. He felt bitter and broken, he didn't want to feel like that. He especially missed the way he felt with you. Almost like being on cloud nine. He finally understood the pain you felt when Jean died. This time on a more intimate level than he'd like to admit. He felt like the moon was ripped away from him after the sun. Now he was just the lonely tide, washing away against the shore until you returned. Ororo did all she could to help. All she could do was maintain your physical well-being as your body healed with rest. Logan hated the wait. The time you spent not walking around the halls of the school was maybe one of the worst times in his life. Since it hit him so deep on a real level. In this array of pain and even more guilt, he felt something dawn on him as you were still comatose. He was in love with you, Logan was in love with you. He felt like an idiot but the realization would always stay true. No matter how stupid he felt. As much as he wanted to deny it, he knew. In the middle of his thought process, he heard the swift slide open of the infirmary doors.
Right now he was standing over you. The one thing that kept his spirits high about your recovery was the gentle rise and lower of your chest. He didn't have to look behind him to know it was Storm. She too had taken her time checking in on your unconscious form. He sighed as she walked up right beside him. She gently cupped the examination table where your body would lay. She looked down at her hands with a bitter-sweet smile on her lips. She looked over to Logan, who was at a pause with himself. She decided to finally break the long silence. "You know they'll be fine, right?" She hummed as she glanced up to look over you. He chuckled softly as his brow pinched. His chuckle came out more like a rugged scoff. "I know, this just feels weird." He sucked in a breath of stale air. "It was funny the first night you arrived at the mansion.." Storm drew up a memory of that fateful night. "As soon as I and Scott brought you in, they immediately volunteered to help Jean down here with your examination. They were always enamored with your set of abilities. You were one of a kind to them especially, I suppose." Now his hands gripped into the sides of the examination table. He looked down, in pity of you and himself. How could he be so blind? Storm butted in once more as she noticed his demeanor shift. "All I'm saying is, they'd be happy to know how much you worried." He nodded in response, reminiscing when things were good. From your first encounter to now, his heart warmed. "I'd do it for anyone else." He gritted out as he bit back a smile. The truth was he was still in agony about Jean's loss. It felt wrong to love you as he had longed for her after all of this time. But you felt like a whole different story. He didn't have to sit in agony knowing that no matter what his love would always be with another. You always gave him the time and day, hell even down to the minute to just be honest. He needed you at his side no matter what you were to him. Maybe you were more than a friend, maybe he was crazy about you, but you understood him. In a way maybe Jean never had. Ororo knew he needed more time so she complied with the awkwardness in the air. "I'll give you some more time. Rest easy Logan, they'd want that." She insisted before making her way out of the infirmary. He immediately looked down back at you, before looking back at the monitor tracking your heart. He sighed, biting into his lip. He stuttered the only thing that had been keeping him sane since he last felt your eyes open. "Don't fail me now dimples... I need you." He gritted as his teeth were practically ground into his gums. It has become a regular part of his routine now. Once the students were back in their dorms for the night, down to the infirmary he goes. He could never be tired of seeing you at rest. Seeing you okay and not in pain. He just wished he could hear you speak. He hoped that you could hear his pleas for you to wake.
As much as he longed for you he just bided his time. Like the fool he was, like the idiot he felt like when you made him so weak. You made him feel the most human he ever could feel.
That day was supposed to be a normal day. Classes had been more and more brief. After the loss of Jean and you being "put out." But he did not expect to see what he did next. Going into the elevator to head downstairs, to of course see you as always. He was ready to talk about what you missed away and so on. His chest tightened once he saw what was right in front of him. It was you, you were walking? You were awake and on your own two feet. Your midsection was still bandaged but at least you were standing up straight. But then it finally clicked. Wait, you shouldn't even be walking around right now?!
He immediately ran to steady you once your expression went more absent. "Welcome back to the land of the living." He roughly inquired with a small, pleased grin. "I feel like shit, so don't start with me Wolvie." You gritted out with that smile that made him too feel all good on the inside. Quickly, his arms calmly wrapped around you. He longed for your embrace for too long. It wasn't like you were fighting him when he enacted this. You wrapped your arms around him too. He made sure not to squeeze too tight with your bandages and all. A gentleman must stay mindful, he could recall you poking at him as he had a beer bottle half hidden in his jacket.
Your head gently rested in the crook of his neck. That quiet he hated so much before when seeing you in the infirmary was warmer now. He liked the peace and quiet between the two of you when you were there WITH him. After some minutes passed, you met him back face to face. You eyes lingered as you watched the way he swallowed in with composure. You had longed for him to see you. Finally, all the puzzle pieces were clicking, and with your luck all at once. You knew before this would have never happened. It felt wrong and almost hurtful for you to be doing this. But go big or go home I guess. It was you who initiated it, and he gratefully complied. Still keeping you steady, once your lips met his hand immediately went to cup your cheek. In the bliss shared, all of a sudden it felt right. The tender embrace of your lips with his felt good. It was hungry and it was liberating. You could feel his heart beating out of his chest as quick gasps for air were taken. "I'm sorry." He uttered out, forehead against yours. "I know." You said with a sanguine look in your eye. "I love you." He uttered again at a rapid pace. "I know." You purred, your eyes looking back into his hazy ones. Things would always be complicated between the both of you. But deep down you had hope. Maybe not now, someday things could just be normal between you and The Wolverine. That's all you wanted and that's all you dreamed of. Yours and his timing by all means was horrible. So it wasn't surprising this delightful moment got interrupted by Scott of all people. You and Logan looked back, hands immediately darting off of one another. Time to address THAT later.
Scott's mouth fell agape as he began to regret coming down here in the first place. He readjusted his glasses with a small scowl. "Well hello to you too, and Logan." He turned his head to give him that same look. "Wanted to check on you but clearly -" He made sure to put a specific emphasis on 'clearly.' "That job has been overtaken by him.. I'll get Ororo." Before either you or Logan could interrupt him, Scott was already pressing buttons up to the main floor. Now that it was just the two of you bubbling laughs were shared. You felt finally okay. You felt like yourself after those months of nothing but remembrance. You and The Wolverine wormed back into conversation as you could finally talk BACK to him. Another thing you wouldn't ever admit was that yes, you did hear him. His gentle words would always be your favorite secret. After that display of affection though, your and Logan's bond never stayed just a little secret after that. Even after all the trial and error, and the more soon to come, you finally had another moment. Another moment that you could look at when you are older and with more grays on your head. Logan Howlett was yours, no matter how much the universe wanted to throw you around a loop. You'd always have him by your side, till the end of time. Nothing would stop you from cherishing this connection. Not even the burning phoenix crackling over the horizon. You and Logan against time baby.
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ꔫ✉ reblogs/interaction is appreciated <3
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tojirings · 4 months ago
Text
to yield
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pairing: toji x reader
wordcount: 5k
glimpse: toji's the world-class fighter who trains in your best friend's gym, and you're the all-rounder employee who has a crush on him.
alternatively, mma!toji wants you to stop pining for him, and you finally listen.
[ angst + fluff, So Much Yearning, unrequited love (but only initial!! 😑😑), toji's almost always a little mean whenever he turns u down, nosy as FAWKKK bff satoru, the L word, mentions of mma-related injuries, jealousy, eventual redemption ]
To yearn for Toji is light work. 
Pining after him is as easy as making up workout trivia just to get a reaction from him that isn’t a neutral quirk of his lips or a dismissive tilt of his head. You’re pretty sure you’re going overboard with said lies (the proof being you having to approach Toji without Satoru in earshot just so the latter wouldn’t burst out laughing), but Toji doesn’t seem to think so.
He’s either very clueless and actually believes you, or he’s just tolerant of your “fact” of the day despite being annoyed to death with you.
“Now where the hell did you hear that?” he narrows his eyes at you, the ghost of an amused smirk lingering in his lips the longer you look at him in anticipation for his reaction.
“Just… somewhere! I heard it’s verified information,” you smile, nodding your head to delay the incoming wave of embarrassment that you have for yourself.
“Oh, okay,” Toji parts his lips, nodding tersely. “A reputable news site really said that my grip strength is stronger than a shark’s?”
“Mhmm. You’re the strongest, I bet,” you squeak, the tremble of your hands behind your back coming to a halt when Toji has to excuse himself because Satoru hollered at him from the other side of the gym.
You’re not ready at all to confess to Toji.
Every week, from Monday to Saturday, Toji comes into your best friend’s gym with a scowl on his face as if Satoru personally provoked him one way or another (read: he did), within the window of 9 to 10 AM. Only his left hand would be occupied by his gym bag, which he leaves to you for safekeeping at the front desk instead of the locker room, because Toji would rather punch himself in the gut than to deal with overeager fanboys asking him about his fights.
Additionally, every week from Monday to Saturday, you come to the gym at 7 AM sharp, partially to clock in — but mostly to walk to the expensive coffee shop down the block to buy Toji his drink from your own pocket. Between 9 to 10 AM, Toji saunters into the gym and gives you his bag, to which you take with open arms.
Also, every week, from Monday to Saturday, you make sure that you're Toji’s first interaction of the day.
The routine you have with him (and not the other way around because he’s definitely not as involved with you than you are with him) starts with you giving him a wildcard drink that the barista recommended, then Toji either scrunching his nose in disgust or him humming in something a little bit more pleasant than disgust, then him later thanking you before giving you his standard response.
“You don’t have to do this, Y/N,” he’d say, his brows soft yet scrunched in the middle. (In other words: I don’t like you back so you don’t have to do this for me at all.)
“But I want to,” you’d reply, your smile small yet unperturbed. (In other words: I like you and I want to do this for you regardless, but a large part of me hopes that you’ll like me back.)
It’s no secret that you have a crush on Toji– not at all. Practically everyone in the gym knows how head-over-heels you are for him, and maybe even more than the fighter in question.
Satoru knows it, and he groans to no end whenever you pine for Toji like a little puppy. With each interaction you have with Toji that’s more desperate and maybe even a little more pathetic from your end than usual, Satoru wastes no time before offering to set you up with one of his friends, to which you always deny.
Shiu knows it too, and he tries to bring you up during sparring sessions with Toji that come after seeing your more helpless flirting attempts with the latter. Shiu’s actively trying to help you, Toji, and himself in the process because he can’t tell just how much secondhand embarrassment he can take before exploding.
The occasional opponents for practice matches know it. The night janitor knows it. God, even the delivery guy who’s only seen you ask Toji if he wanted water once knows it too.
Toji doesn’t like you, and while you know that fact wholeheartedly, you’ve come to realize that taking care of him in your own way is what completes your day even without getting anything in return. You know you’re bound to be sick of the one-sided yearning anyway, but while you’re not sick of fawning over Toji, you want to make the most of it.
You want to make the most of it until defeat sinks in.
Toji does not care for you — or atleast that’s what he tells everyone.
“I don’t have a crush on her. Never did,” Toji would say to Shiu every time they sparred, his words automatically flowing as soon as he sees the slightest hint of a smirk on his handler’s face. Shiu would always wave him away as usual (and that earns him an ungloved and unrestricted punch on the shoulder out of the ring), and it only makes Toji pout because even his friend doesn’t believe him.
“I don’t like girls who are so obvious,” he would mutter under his breath whenever Satoru nudges him to say thank you when you hold out a clean towel for him even if he didn’t ask. Toji appreciates the cold, fragrant, and personally-delivered-by-you towel anyway, but not enough to smack Satoru on the face with it.
“I don’t know why you’d think that,” Toji, without fail, would reply to anyone in the gym who mistakes him as your boyfriend. He’s gotten shameless with it to the point that he doesn’t mind if you hear it, but also without fail, he feels a little guilty every time.
Toji shouldn’t exactly feel guilty for not liking you back because he doesn’t owe it to you in the first place — or atleast that’s how he reasons with himself.
.
.
.
“I’m gonna stop liking him in a week, Toru. I swear. Cold turkey and everything.” 
“Yup. Sure you will, sport,” Satoru snorts at your drunken admission, kicking your knee lightly to stop you from your sulking.
He feels a little responsible for your feelings towards Toji because if only he didn’t introduce you to him, none of this would’ve happened in the first place. 
You would’ve still been his sole accountant for his gym who only dropped in every once in awhile to help manage the place whenever it was short-staffed and not this; not the multi-tasking beast that you are who’s not only his accountant, but this cheery and energized all-rounder gym employee you he didn’t ask you to be.
“No, no. I’m serious this time,” you mutter, your cheek squished to the table so you can limit yourself from saying anything else that could explain to Satoru why you were hellbent in accepting his offer to drink tonight. “I feel like a fool running after Toji.”
“I mean, I wouldn’t exactly use the word-…”
“I know you think it.”
“Fine. I do think it, but you know I mean well!” Satoru surrenders, ruffling your hair as he takes note of keeping the windows down and driving as slowly as he legally could when he takes you home tonight. “You just aren’t Toji’s type, but that’s not a bad thing, y’know? 
There’s so much more on your mind, but you’re not in the mood to think of Toji any longer because the moment you do, you’ll succumb to him again.
You want to surrender, completely and irrevocably this time, but not without the final push so you could say that you did everything and you’ll have no regrets if Toji turns you down again — or rather, when Toji turns you down again.
“If it doesn’t work out,” you hiccup, burying your face to the bulk of Satoru’s sweater so you could smell the scent of clean laundry on him instead of imagining that you’re smelling Toji’s perfume out of nowhere in the packed club. “Go set me up with your friend.”
( ♡ ) 
Toji’s a little perplexed to see you at the front desk this morning.
After all, it was only last night when he saw you at the club, looking completely spent with your head buried in Satoru’s shoulder. Toji had only nodded to him when their eyes locked, mouthing that he’s with his friends so he can’t hang back with him, and Satoru let him go without any annoying remarks because he just gestures to your sleeping figure wordlessly.
Weirdly enough, Toji didn’t get to enjoy himself last night because his eyes kept wandering to your booth.
What’s even weirder now is that not only did you come to work looking fully recovered, but Toji also hangs back for a fraction of a minute right after giving you his duffel bag.
“Hey,” he greets, smiling tightly as he tries to figure out internally on why his feet wouldn’t move at all.
“Hi, Toji,” you reply back, staying still on your seat as you try to make conversation with him, but oddly enough, no ridiculous trivia could come out of your lips.
All it takes is Satoru whistling from the breakroom for you to snap into your senses, and for Toji to realize what was missing.
You have no drink for him today.
He’s not that bothered because that means he’s not subjected to whatever overly sweet or bitter monstrosity you give him, and that could only mean that he’ll be able to skip giving you his signature rejection.
It’s a good thing for you to start giving up on him, he convinces himself.
Toji tolerates you in a way that’s unbeknownst even to you, because in the first place, you’ve convinced yourself that the crush you have on the MMA fighter isn’t that serious.
Swiping your employee card to get him a free energy drink isn’t that serious in your own perspective, but when you overheard the conversation awhile ago between Toji and Shiu (with the latter convincing him that free energy drinks equated to a marriage proposal), you started doing it for everyone. You swipe your card over and over even for the fighters you barely know, but oddly enough, Toji’s eyes twitch whenever he sees his favorite grape-flavored drink in everyone’s hands.
Offering the Bluetooth connection code to Toji for him to play whatever he wants to on the speakers may be a little serious, but you convince yourself that it really isn’t when you accidentally eavesdrop on Satoru telling him that you totally have it out for him. What you do for Toji, you start to do for everyone; it’s telling with the way your speakers announce whose phone it’s connected to every thirty minutes, but not so much telling as to why Toji’s going extra hard sparring with his handler.
Toji does not care for you — or atleast that’s what you’ve convinced yourself.
Denying his fondness for you has almost been as easy as you tamping down your adoration for him, so much so that when a new guy at the gym randomly comes up to Toji and mentions your name, he responds automatically.
“We’re not together. Go ask…” her out — that’s what Toji’s supposed to say. “I don’t know, actually. I heard she’s taken, I think,” he rectifies himself, exiting the conversation before he could be bombarded with yet another question that revolved around you.
Or another question that would only make him realize that you having eyes for only him doesn’t equate to other people backing off from that mere fact alone.
Toji doesn’t like you, but oddly enough, the fact doesn’t bother you as much lately.
( ♡ ) 
You’re on your last leg of pining for Toji.
The shame of it all is finally getting to you, seeping into your deepest crevices that had thought for the longest time that you had a fighting chance with him. You don’t exactly regret yearning for Toji because after all, it had been in your own accord, no matter the risks you’ve already taken.
Maybe, just maybe, you could only go up from here. 
Maybe, because you and Toji hadn’t been friends to begin with when you pursued him, but on the other hand, it could be your ultimate downfall because perhaps right after he turns you down this time, you won’t be able to come back to anything.
There’s no foundation built between the two of you for you to fall back on, and while that’s surely devastating for you, it would only be a walk in the park for Toji.
You’re risking it all, even if you’re just as sure that nothing will come out of this, because you know you won’t come out unscathed — when Toji finally lets you down this time, harshly like you don’t mean anything to him, you’ll know then that you did everything in your power before you gave up on him.
The omamori in your hands that you’ve planned giving to him is your only salvation, because you get to grip it and remind yourself in real time that Toji’s seething at you.
He’s been stressed since the early morning fighting with his manager who had considered fixing up a match, and despite having resolved it with Choso already even before you came into his eyesight, Toji can’t shake off the anger from his body.
You’re the first person who comes into his space and into his mind, and you’re probably the last for the day (and maybe for an unforeseen amount of time) with the way he snaps at you.
“Y/N, can you just-“ Toji sharply inhales, clenching his jaw so tightly just so he can’t make his voice any louder. “Can you just please fucking stop?”
The omamori that you’re gripping tightly in your hands, the same one that you’ve gotten for blessings and protection for his fight in a month’s time, reminds you that Toji doesn’t want anything to do with you.
“I bet you’re a nice girl and all but I just don’t want you, okay?” he nods breathlessly as if asking you for confirmation. “I don’t like you like that.”
After a year and then some of yearning for Toji, you finally yield.
( ♡ ) 
You don’t come in for work.
Your absence is easily noticed because by this hour, you should’ve been glued to your seat by the front desk, ready to stash Toji’s gym bag under your desk.
He freezes by the entrance, brows knitted in confusion to see that your spot’s empty. He and his bag have been spoiled by you to the point that Toji feels uncharacteristically displaced when he walks past your desk, with his bag and without his drink.
“Huh,” Toji mutters to himself, strolling as casually as he could to the breakroom. He’s already had breakfast and he’ll be willing to have another one if it means lingering around you today, but to his surprise (and his surprise only), you aren’t there. “That’s weird.”
Toji jolts in place when he senses an agitating presence behind him that does little to conceal his proximity behind him, fists immediately clenching when he sees Satoru lean on the wall next to him.
“Jeez. I wonder who could’ve possibly said what to Y/N that made her call in sick today,” he enunciates slowly, enough for the sarcasm to steep in and his words to absorb into Toji’s thick skull.
“What are you-…” Toji interrupts himself when he finally gets what Satoru’s pertaining to, the skip of his chest being telling about the guilt that’s been stewing at the back of his head since last night.
“You weren’t exactly discreet about it, idiot. We were in the breakroom,” Satoru rolls his eyes, standing to his full height when he sees Toji falter. “Even Shiu heard you and he has the most effective noise-cancelling headphones known to man.”
Right on cue, Shiu comes out leisurely out of the room he had been peeking at two seconds ago. It takes only a second for him to register that Toji’s outside for whatever reason (he knows exactly why) before whistling in response, the shit-eating grin on his face apparent for Toji to remember.
“Woof,” he chuckles. “Don’t go biting my head now. I bet you’re a nice guy and all.”
It’s a build-up of things since this morning, and perhaps even from last night if he counts the immediate tinge of regret that stings him when he’s seethed his rejection at you, that truly throws Toji off his game.
Maybe it’s Satoru’s repeated teasing throughout the day and his targeted material of asking whether Toji was hungry or not, right within the timeframe wherein you usually ask him if he wants to join you for a meal.
Maybe it’s Shiu’s incessant mentioning of your name throughout his workout and the convenient reminder that Toji’s working out harder than he usually does, yet there’s no cold towel waiting for him.
But really, whatever it is that just adds up to the already excessive noise in Toji’s head concerning you, he knows now more than ever that absence your absence is noticeable.
His opponent for today’s practice match knows it. The day janitor knows it. Even the delivery guy who’s only been here twice knows it.
Toji simmers in guilt except he doesn’t want to admit it just yet, full well knowing that he would have texted you an apology — if only he had your number.
( ♡ ) 
You come back after three days.
After a year and some months’ worth of excessive reminders from Satoru, you finally take into realization that you don’t have to go to work in-person as often as you do. 
You didn’t know that all it would take for you to slow down and take your much-needed break is Toji by some way (read: rejecting you so harshly that you had been mute on your way home), and you haven’t predicted at all that there’ll be a day wherein you come to work not to pursue him.
Toji immediately notices your presence because even if you were no longer perched by the front desk, it was apparent that you’re already back judging by the way everyone– and literally everyone— in the gym seemed to look at ease somehow.
You’re at the other side of the gym with the light equipment that Toji barely frequents, and it’s the way you stand and smile that makes him pause.
It’s also the way that you smile at Choso that makes Toji announce his presence loudly.
“Let me help you there, buddy,” he claps behind the guy he recognizes as one of his fans (in all fairness, Yuuji isn’t as annoying as all the others who only come here just to get a glimpse of him), startling his already trembling figure.
Toji, without any hesitation yet a lot of frustration, easily grabs the heavy barbell mid-air that Yuuji’s struggling with before dropping it to the ground as roughly as he could.
It’s too light for him. Too easy, even. 
What’s heavier for Toji at the moment is the realization that you’ve given up on him and he has no one to blame but his emotional constipation, and maybe Choso who had pissed him off prior to his tantrum at you.
You did look at Toji and the mini scene he had created, but you immediately avert your eyes as soon as he fixates on yours.
He feels untethered this way, and if the lump on his throat is omniscient of the guilt that he’s feeling yet he’s unable to put into words, Toji wants you to notice him again, tirelessly and shamelessly like you did before.
He’s not in his usual zone, so much so that he barely makes any banter with Shiu who had been talking his ear off in letting Satoru have a go at him.
Toji’s too far out of his concentration, so much so that he agrees to spar with Satoru. 
He’s been pestering him for the longest time to get in the ring with him and Toji had always declined, even if he knows that your friend could take him on to some degree. He’s turned him down again and again for even just a light sparring session, especially when you were around, because he knows that he’s your friend.
He wouldn’t want to hurt Satoru if it hurts you, except now, the difference is that the latter really wants to hurt him and the former is out of his game to the point that he’ll resort to anything just to get your attention.
Toji lands a punch so hard that Satoru audibly croaks, holding his stomach even with the padding on. You’ve always been (read: used to be) the biggest fan of Toji even in practice matches, but now, instead of cheering for him, your eyebrows knit in worry instead–
Except your concern isn’t for him.
“Satoru? You okay?” you immediately come to his side by the ring, eyes inspecting him from head to toe.
Before he could even say that he is and that he’ll get back at Toji with twice the power, Toji pipes in from behind your friend, raising a gloved hand sheepishly.
“I’m not.” 
Toji shamelessly declares his apparent hurt, making everyone nearby audibly gawk at him for his audacity. You only blink at him in the surprise, trying your earnest to see on what part and capacity could Satoru, a non-professional, has possibly injured him.
“H-he punched me by the ear,” he stutters, the lie catching onto his teeth on the way out. The embarrassment of him making up an unbelievable lie is yet to hit, but Toji wouldn’t mind either way.
“What?! I barely even hit you in the face!” Satoru reacts, his face indescribable with the way he swats Toji on the arm in disbelief.
You snort at the scene in amusement, yet your eyes stay fixated on your friend.
“Yeah, yeah. I believe you, Toru.”
( ♡ ) 
True to his word, Satoru sets you up with his friend.
It was amusing, if not mildly infuriating with regards to the universe’s fate for your heart, to learn that Suguru’s the owner of the upscale café you’ve been buying Toji’s drinks from for six out of seven days a week.
It’s actually amusing to the point that you immediately smile whenever Satoru brings up Suguru, even for no particular reason, because if only time and luck had been at your side, you would’ve met him earlier and spared yourself the heartbreak from Toji.
You know to yourself, even in the deepest pits of your stomach that would like to argue otherwise, that you would’ve like Toji regardless even if you met Suguru earlier — what irks you about the whole thing is that fate is twisted.
You’re at standstill with the guy who checks all your boxes and actually likes you back unlike Toji, except this time, you’re content at staying in whatever playful relationship that you and Suguru are in now. 
It’s not a mess per se, but it’s a playful blunder between the two of you wherein you flirt and like each other’s presence, except you’re not in a relationship at all because neither of you are in a rush.
Oddly enough, having each other while not exactly owning the other at same time is enjoyable for the both of you.
For not atleast, you and Suguru are simply fated to be a pair of flirty friends that enjoy each other’s company without having to come home at the end of the night. He has his reservations while you have yours too, but they didn’t mean anything when the other just needs another shoulder present.
Your reservations don’t matter at the moment when there’s an inner turmoil that roots from the base of your chest, simply because Satoru had made the offhand comment that Toji kept asking him about you while you weren’t around.
Your reservations don’t matter at the moment when Suguru comes at the perfect time because he’s not as familiar as the best friend you grew up with, nor is he as fond as the man you’ve spent the better part of a year crushing on and are now wanting to move on from.
“Who’s that?” Toji snaps to no one in particular, the scowl on his face off-putting and intriguing enough for Satoru to notice. He follows Toji’s line of sight, a sly smirk already building up on his face at the prospect of teasing him, even if he knows your real score with Suguru.
“Oh, that’s Suguru. He’s my friend.”
“Didn’t he use to be that defending champion or something?” Toji murmurs, crossing his arms. He vaguely recalls how he once read an article detailing the young player retiring early so he could live a normal life, hearing the name Geto every once in awhile. “Why’s he here?”
“Didn’t you say you never keep tabs on other players?” Satoru snickers, the teasing smirk apparent on his face because of Toji’s sheer bitterness. “Also, it’s my gym. He’s not allowed around here or something?”
“Whatever. Don’t care,” Toji grumbles. “I could take him in a fight. I’d probably destroy him.”
Toji feels unwell, not because he spent a solid ten minutes arguing with a defensive Satoru that keeps insisting his best friend could totally defeat him in a fight, but because throughout that time, not once did you stop smiling at whatever Suguru has to say to you.
Your eyes are practically gleaming and although he loves the sight, there’s this ache that blooms in his chest and spreads all the way to the base of his spine knowing that it’s what you had looked like in front of him for the longest time.
“I bought lunch.”
Toji approaches you as soon as Suguru goes to the bathroom, his smile gentle and hesitant. 
It’s a first for you because you usually treat him. At the start, it was you treating everyone in order not to be transparent with your crush, but there’d been a couple obvious times in which you only exerted efforts for Toji and only him.
Toji doesn’t bother with an excuse of treating everyone or that he had bought too many; he just wants to have lunch with you. “Want some?”
“No, but thank you,” you answer lowly, the shake of your head barely noticeable because you don’t want to look him in the eye.
Toji’s more confused than he is deterred, the bag in his hands suddenly weighing a ton. “But you haven’t left your desk so that means you haven’t eaten yet,” he points out. “Do you not like this type of food? If not, I could just run to the-…”
“There you are!” 
Suguru comes back, and just like that, the crumbs of attention you were giving him had been cleaned up entirely. 
“Let’s go, let’s go, let’s gooo, doll. I wanna beat everyone else to the limited specials,” Suguru ignores his obvious beating presence and practically drags you out from your chair (even though you needed little convincing), the hold he has on your wrist making Toji see red briefly.
Toji’s jaw clenches, unconsciously stepping out of the gym not long since you and Suguru rushed out, his sharp eyes following you until you both turn the corner.
It’s the same shop he got your food from.
( ♡ ) 
Toji can’t put a finger to what he’s feeling.
He feels different; the bad and dull kind of different that makes him listless and anxious no matter how much he tries to tire himself out.
He’ll subject himself to an agonizing workout with no breaks in between, but after that, he could only think about the way your bottom lip trembled at his words.
He’ll put himself through one practice match after another without any proper training, and even if Toji wins as he always does, he could only think about how he’s lost all of your affection that he had unconsciously looked forward to the entire time.
Toji finds himself lingering around you and he doesn't know if he could just continue hovering and hovering in this way; in a way that's unlike yours because you were unafraid to stand so close to him, talk to him whenever you please, and trail around him like a lost puppy in the past.
He’s upset and he doesn’t even know why he allows himself to feel that way, when for the longest time, he had convinced himself that he didn’t give you any hope so he had no reason to feel guilty about turning you down; so that he had no problem ignoring you while dealing with his constipation of not apologizing.
Toji’s upset, except he’s too self-aware to the point that it’s only his spite that keeps him awake with regret; he did give you hope. 
He didlinger around you and accept whatever you had to give him despite his lips making out the sentiment that he can never return them.
He did feel guilty at the prospect of turning you down right from the start because if that wasn’t the case, then you would have long given up on him. 
He did feel guilty about rejecting you, especially considering the fact that he wasn’t wholeheartedly sure whenever he refused your love — he still does.
“Toji?” you call out, the sound of your voice immediately startling him with the lights already dim in the breakroom. Toji only frequented the breakroom whenever you were there, and the odd, if not ironic, turn of events makes him smile humorlessly. “Are you drunk? Do you need me to call Satoru?” you ask with genuine concern, tilting your head as you try to assess his figure. “Do you want to go home?”
“Nah,” he shakes his head softly. “It’s jus’ to take the edge off. Probably easier to get a horse drunk than to get metipsy.”
You give a small smile at that, the tremble of your hands barely noticeable with the way Toji’s even more nervous than you at the realization that the two of you are alone with each other.
You’re only here because you forgot your laptop, and Toji’s only here because he doesn’t know what to make of himself because you’ve detached yourself from his routine— from his life, it seems like.
Toji looks down on his full glass, swirling it by his knee. There’s an unspeakable sorrow to his face with something about it resembling you, or atleast the resignation you felt every time Toji turned you down less than gently.
“Why don’t you like me anymore?”
Your eyes widen at the question, the words left in the tip of your tongue drying out the longer that Toji looked at you this way — like he’s stooped down to the level you used to be in, his eyes tired and glassy.
“Why don’t you like me anymore?” he repeats, mistaking the shock on your face for confusion. “If I… i-if I pretend to be drunk and ask you out, will you say yes?” Toji murmurs, using the back of his hand to clumsily get rid of the wetness that had unknowingly formed at the corners of his eyes. “Would that make you go back to liking me again?”
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poppitron360 · 4 months ago
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Hi guys the world is a fucked up place but don’t think about that think about Jason getting Reyna to teach him Spanish so that he can propose to Leo in his own language.
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satorusugurugurl · 8 days ago
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👻Marie’s Kinktober Masterlist!🎃
Here’s the masterlist to Kinktober! I had a lot of fun! But after posting a whole month straight i’m going to be taking a couple of extra days offro just unwins! Thanks for all the love a support! 🥰
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1. The Ghost in My Apartment- Choso
2. Return to Me -Toji
3. Fierce -Sukuna
4. Caught You- Nanami
5. My Little Milk Cow- Gojo
6. Maze of Fears- Geto
7. Blood and Chocolate- Geto
8. What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie- Geto
9. The Full Moon- Gojo
10. Romance for the recently Deceased- Choso
11. Would You Like a Balloon- Gojo
12. The Incantation- Gojo
13. The Vampiress and the Hunter- Toji
14. Distractions and Tentacles- Geto
15. Candy Inspection - Geto
16. Yeehaw!- Geto
17. Heat- Wolf!Suguru
18. Paging Dr. Sexy and Dr. McDreamy- SatoSugu
19. Tangled Up With You- Geto
20. Mine- Geto
21. Candy Apples- Geto
22. Give Me a Trick -Geto
23. Your Costume?!- JJK Men
24. Sleeping Beauty (Somo)- JJK Men
25. Never Have I Ever- Geto
26. Frankenstein -Kenjaku/Geto
27. A Quiet Place- Geto
28. Feverish- SatoSugu
29. Love Bites- Gojo
30. Toss a Coin- Nanami
31. Pheromone Perfume while trick or treating- JJK Men
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bones-of-a-rabbit · 3 months ago
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aww come on it's not like he MEANT to fluster u,, and even if he did, it's not his fault u make it so easy <3
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bruisedboys · 2 years ago
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can I request eddie and shy!reader with reader’s first kiss?! I imagine he’d be so gentle with her!
I want him to be my first kiss so bad!! waiting for him to be real so he can kiss me tbh
summary: eddie gives shy!you your first kiss
shy!fem!reader 0.9k words
Eddie thinks you look really pretty.
He’d tell you so but he’s already told you twice tonight, and he’s pretty sure if he says it again you’ll burst into flames on the spot. You’re quite shy — it’s endearing and very adorable but it also means Eddie has to be more careful of what he says and does. He wouldn’t want to scare you off.
He watches you pore over a book, sitting cross-legged on his bed. He badly wants to tell you how lovely you look. In a t-shirt that’s too big for you and a pair of sweatpants. Your hair all messy pretty and tucked behind your ears. He holds his tongue, turning back to the old band tee he’s hacking the sleeves off on his bedroom floor.
“Eddie?”
Your voice breaks the comfortable silence you and Eddie had been sitting in. Eddie puts down his scissors and looks up. He likes the way you’ve said his name, like he’s the only person ever. He’s sure he sounds similar when he says your name. He smiles at you.
“Yeah?”
You shuffle forwards on his bed, sliding to the edge until your legs dangle off. Eddie’s struck, yet again, by how beautiful you are. It takes all the breath out of his chest.
“Um.” You pause then, and get this nervous look on your face. Eddie knows it well. You’re often nervous around him.
He sits up straighter. By the looks of it you’re wanting to tell him something. Or ask him something. “Yeah, honey?”
Your eyes flick to Eddie and then back to your hands where they’re twisted in your lap. Eddie sees the tap tap tap of your foot, the wringing of your hands. He shuffles forward on the floor and gets a hand on your knee, fingers curling around the bottom of your thigh.
“What is it?” He asks softly.
When you answer your staring at your lap, determined to avoid Eddie’s eyes.
“Well … I just. I was reading that part in The Princess Bride, the bit about the five kisses? And I just wondering …” You reach up and scrub the back of your neck awkwardly. “Why haven’t we kissed yet?”
Eddie balks. He was not expecting that. It’s a big question — for you to ask and for Eddie to answer. He has his own reasons. The biggest one being he’s afraid to scare you off, to mess up maybe the best thing in his life right now. Not only that, but he knows how tentative you are about relationship stuff. It’s all new to you.
The silence stretches too long. Eddie rushes to break it before you think he’s gone and backed out on you.
“Oh.” He says, more flustered than he’s ever been with you. Normally you’re the flustered one. He’s realising now how hard it is being on the receiving end. “Well, um. I … I guess—“
“Do you not want to?” You ask quietly, interrupting Eddie’s rambling.
Eddie stops short. “What?” He stares up at you. He can hardly believe you think that. Of course he wants to kiss you — he’d kind of thought you wouldn’t want him to. “No. No, sweetheart, that’s not it. I just. Well, I just wanted to wait until you were ready … “ He pauses, catches the look on your face, like you’re waiting for something to happen. “Are you ready?”
You bite your lip. Not for the first time, Eddie wonders what it would be like to kiss your lips. You nod very slowly.
“I think so,” you say. You’re staring at his mouth now.
Eddie nods so quick he almost snaps his neck. He hardly cares.
“Okay,” he says earnestly. He scrambles to his feet and then moves to stand in front of you, your knees pressing into his legs.
You blink up at him. Eddie can’t resist taking your face in his hands. Your skin is hot to touch. He imagines his face would feel the same.
“You’re really pretty,” he says despite himself. Even though he’d promised not to tell you again until at least tomorrow.
“Eddie,” you chide softly.
Eddie just grins. “Are you sure you want to?” He asks you, struggling to hear himself over the thump of his heart in his ears. He very much wants to give you a Princess Bride worthy kiss right now.
You nod around his hands. “I’m sure,” you say.
Eddie leans in then. His hands on your face, pulling you gently towards him. His eyelids fluttering shut. It feels different but it feels right. He’s about half a second away from kissing you when you say,
“Wait.”
Eddie opens his eyes. You’re so close he could count your eyelashes.
“What?��� He whispers back.
“I’ve never kissed anyone before,” you say. Your breath fans over Eddie’s mouth, your lips ghosting over his. It takes all his might not to kiss you right then and there. “I don’t know how,” you admit.
“That’s okay,” Eddie tells you. It is okay. And he’s maybe a lot more honoured than he should be that he’s gonna be your first kiss. “You’ll learn.”
“You’ll teach me?”
Eddie looks at you and thinks yeah, he’ll teach you. He’ll do literally anything you could ever ask of him. “Of course, angel.”
“Okay,” you say. You smile and Eddie thinks if he doesn’t kiss you now he might pass out.
He kisses you. He doesn’t pass out but he comes pretty close.
-
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kintojii · 1 year ago
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I saw that post about toxic Toji and I can't help but think about what if Reader doesn't give a damn about him being with other women. She just get with other men like Geto for example
man will be nowhere near happy when he finds out. he will manipulate you to thinking you did something so wrong to him and you should be the one saying sorry. then he’ll fuck you so bad that you’ll end up crying and begging him to stop. he won’t let you cum until you say that you belong to him and him only. he’ll make you promise to him that you’ll never let another man touch you again. “fuck heh, should i just tattoo my name — fuck — here beside your fucking pussy …” he’ll only stop when you’re stuff with his cum, no orgasm will be wasted. you should at least thank him for making u full.
after he’s satisfied he’ll send the video he secretly filmed to geto, just a lil reminder xoxo
toji *attachment*
toji still so tight, ya didn’t stretch my baby enough :(
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scarlethexelove · 3 months ago
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Two Plus Two
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Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader
Word Count: 4728
Warnings: Smut, Pregnant reader, Mommy kink, Face sitting (Wanda), Oral (Both), Fingering (Both), Strap-on (Reader), Blood, Birth, Fluff, A bit of angst I guess.
Pt 1, Pt 3
A/n: Ok finally edited part 2 of Love story. This is definitely not my best work and I kind of hate it but I really needed to get some of this out there. Just some horny Wanda and reader giving birth. I know some people didn't like one of the names that I picked but I have always had a love for the name so I used it. Yes it is weird but I love it. Enjoy and eventually I will edit the last part.
NO ONE IS PERMITTED TO STEAL, COPY, OR REBLOG MY WORK AS THEIR OWN
You're now 7 months pregnant lying-in bed trying to relax after a long day. Wanda comes in and sees you stretched out on the bed. You see her and give her grabby hands as she walks over to the bed. She lays down next to you and pulls you closer into her. You lean in connecting your lips. Your lips move together so perfectly as you deepen the kiss. You wrap your hand around Wanda’s neck playing with the baby hairs on the back of her neck. You pull back groaning a bit from how sore your boobs were today. You look up at the ceiling as you huff. Wanda places a hand on your face making you look back at her.
“Baby you should let me help you with that.” Wanda husks. “No, it’s fine. I don’t want anything bad to happen.” You have been insecure and worried the last 3 months that you and Wanda haven’t done anything. She looks at you with sad eyes hoping that she can convince you. Wanda leans over to look into your eye using a low and sultry voice. “Let Mommy help you. It will make you feel so much better.”
You let out a small whimper at her words. Wanda smirks, hoping that she finally gets to you. “Why don’t I help you instead.” You give your wife a smirk. Thinking that giving her something will help you. She raises her eyebrows. “How can you help me?” Her brow raises in question. “Ride my face and you’ll find out.”
Wanda gave you a look of shock. You’re not normally this bold when it comes to the bedroom. “Please!” You plead with your wife giving her your best puppy dog eyes. Wanda rolls her eyes but nods her head. Wanda quickly strips down, tossing her clothes on the floor. “Tap my leg if you need to stop.” You shook your head eagerly before Wanda threw her leg over your head and her glistening folds hovered over your face. She lowered herself further down on your face as you wrapped your arms around her legs. You went straight in finding her clit and taking it into your mouth. Every so lightly flicking it with your tongue and grazing it with your teeth.
“Fuck!” Wanda moaned out as you continued your assault on her pussy. You moved your tongue down teasing her entrance only slightly pushing in before pulling back. “Baby stop playing with mommy like that, you know I don’t like it.” She huffs. “Sorry mommy.” You hum before plunging your tongue in as far as it goes. You eat your wife out as she becomes a moaning mess above you. You move your tongue back up to her clit when you bring up two of your fingers and plunge them into her.
“Sh- shit just like that. Don’t stop.” Wanda says as you start a quick pace with your fingers as you continue to suck on her clit. You start to feel her walls clench around your fingers. So, you start to curl them hitting right into the perfect spot every time you pull them back. It isn’t long before Wanda’s legs start to shake and clamp down on your head. She comes with a loud moan of your name and coating your face with her juices. You lick her clean as she comes down from her high.
Once her legs have stabilized a bit Wanda climbs off your face. Seeing you smirking back up at her, your chin glistening with her release. She leans over giving you a kiss moaning into your mouth when she tastes herself on your lips. “Oh man I have missed that.” You hum as Wanda pulls back. “Let me make you feel good baby. I promise it won’t hurt anything and it will make you feel better. I know your boobs hurt and I can help you.”
After that you are hornier and wetter than before, so you finally give in. “Fine.” Wanda gives you the cutest grin and scrunches her nose before placing another kiss on your lips. Wanting to take it a bit slower with you she starts to move her kisses from your lips down to your jaw. She kisses along your jaw line as her hands find your breast. She starts to slowly knead them. You let out a small whimper followed by a moan when she moved down sucking on your pulse point.
Wanda lets go of your breast as she moves her hands down to the hem of your oversized shirt. You sit up a bit helping her pull it over your head before she lays you back down. You’re not wearing a bra currently due to your boobs being sore, so it gives Wanda full access as she moves her kisses down your chest. She takes your left breast into her mouth as she sucks and flicks her tongue over your nipple. Using her tongue to help message it as her hand works on the right. Moans start to steadily spill out from the sensation. Wanda lets go of your left breast with a pop before giving the right the same amount of attention. Once she is satisfied, she releases it with a pop. She starts to venture further down leaving open mouth kisses between the valley of your breast. 
As Wanda reaches your belly you start to feel your insecurities kick. And try to cover yourself from Wanda. “Detka don’t hide from me.” Wanda leans up. “But I’m fat and ugly.” Your words come out as a whine. “Detka you are not fat or ugly. You are the most perfect person to me. You are carrying our babies and you look beautiful doing it. And I know you have worried about your scars, but they are beautiful and tells everyone you’re a survivor.”
You relax as Wanda moves down, placing kisses on your stomach in different places and over the scar. When Wanda moves kisses on the sides you can feel the twins kicking in that spot as she places the kiss. Wanda looks up with a smile feeling it too. “See, even the twins think you need to relax more.” You chuckle at her as she moves down between your legs. Wanda loops her fingers into the waistband of your sweatpants and underwear. You lift your hips as best as you can as Wanda pulls your pants and underwear off in one go. “Look at you moya lyubov’ so wet for me already.” She smirks looking at your glistening folds. “Only for you mommy.”
You whimper as you feel her placing kisses on your thighs. As she moves closer you can feel her hot breath on your core. Wanda wastes no time diving in. Her lips sucking your clit into her mouth as two of her fingers tease your entrance. You start to buck your hips wanting more friction. Wanda smirks around your clit as she stops teasing you and pushes her fingers in you. “Fuck!” You moan out feeling her move her fingers inside of you. Her fingers set a nice pace as she curls her fingers inside you. She picks up her pace causing you to moan out in pleasure. Your orgasm is quickly approaching.
Wanda moved her mouth away from your clit replacing it with her thumb as she continued to pump her fingers in and out. She places soft kisses on your belly as she watches your head fall back on the pillow, the coil tightening in your belly. “Oh, Fuck, please mommy.” You whine. “I’ve got you baby.” You scream out her name as your legs shake and your orgasm crashes into you. Wanda rides you through your orgasm. Once your high is gone she pulls out her fingers. You look up to watch her place them in her mouth and suck them clean of your juices. “Fuck that’s hot.” You say as Wanda smirks at you, releasing her fingers with a pop.
“Do you think you can handle one more. You have been so stressed lately. I know this will help.” You bite your lip shaking your head yes not wanting this to stop just yet. Wanda smiles at you, and you watch as her eyes flash red then back to their natural green. That’s when you feel the tip of her strap teasing your folds. You realize she conjured up the strap when her eyes flashed red. She slowly pushes into you letting you get adjusted to the size. Moans escaping your lips the further she thrust into you.
Wanda bottoms out in you and you're already ready for her as you start to grind your hips down on the strap. Your legs wrap around her waist the best they can. She knows that she can start moving. She pulls it all the way back to where just the tip is in and then thrust back into you. “Fuck mommy.” You moan out as Wanda sets a fast and steady pace. She pounds into you, and you meet her with every thrust.
All you want to do right now is leave scratches up and down her back but due to your belly you can’t reach her. You can reach her arms, so you grip onto her forearms digging your nails in as she pounds into you. You can feel this orgasm quickly approaching, Wanda is hitting the perfect spot with every thrust. She can tell you getting closer with every thrust as she moves one hand down to your clit and starts to rub circles. Your head falls back and your eyes roll to the back of your head.
“Wanda!” You scream out as your toes curl, and you can now see stars as you come hard around her strap. Your legs tighten their grip around her waist as she helps you ride out your high. Your legs drop from her waist before she slowly pulls out of you. She gets up off the bed and you whimper feeling her leave. “I’m not going anywhere baby I just need to clean this and I’m going to start a bath to clean you up.” You sigh happily as you now feel the exhaustion from the day and your recent activities weighing you down. Your eyes start to flutter shut before Wanda comes back. “Come on baby just stay awake a little longer once we are done in the bath you can go to sleep.” She kisses your forehead. “Mmm.” You hum in response when you feel yourself being lifted off the bed. Wanda carries you into the bathroom. Quickly turning off the bath before stepping into it and sitting down with you on her lap.
Wanda gently washes your body and your hair as you lay against her. You almost fall asleep a few times while Wanda finishes cleaning herself. She pulls the drain before she stands up with you still in her arms. She gets out, setting you down on the ground so she can dry you off and help you get dressed. She helps you with a bigger oversized tee shirt. You had needed some new ones to fit over your belly. And then she helps you get into some clean underwear and sweatpants. Wanda quickly gets dressed, throwing on one of your oversized shirts and a pair of matching sweatpants. She picks you back up and carries you back to the bed placing you down on the clean sheets that she changed with her powers while she helped you get dressed. She then moved to the other side of the bed getting in. You quickly moved over and snuggled up to her laying your head on her chest, your belly laying on hers.
It took you no time to fall asleep. Wanda watched you for a little bit, she thought that she saw your face contort in a bit of pain, but it quickly changed. So she just ignored it and drifted off to sleep. A few hours later Wanda is woken up to a blood curdling scream. She jolts awake seeing you clutch onto your belly, your forehead sticky with sweat, and you crying. She quickly pulls you into her lap. Your arms wrap around just under her arms and you bury your head in the crook of her neck. “Baby what’s wrong?” Wanda asks you but you just start to sob into her shirt.
Wanda hears footprints and then the door swings open revealing Nat. Wanda uses her powers to flick on the lamps. “What happened?” Nat asks as she moves in the door. “It hurts.” You whimper out, your words coming out muffled from your face being in Wanda’s neck. Wanda flings the blanket off of you two. She looks down and sees a blood spot next to her. Her eyes move from the spot to Nat’s eyes. As soon as they lock eyes from looking at the blood spot Nat dashes out of the room.
No words had to be said as Nat ran to the garage to get a car and meet you two out front. Wanda pulls your body closer as she moves off the bed. Your arms and head not leaving where you have attached yourself. Wanda makes her way to the front seeing Nat getting out of the car and opening the back seat up for you two. Wanda moves into the back seat with you in her lap as Nat closes the door and gets into the drive seat. Drive as fast as she can to get you to the hospital. It takes no time for Nat to pull up in front of the hospital. She gets out and opens the door for Wanda to get you out. Nat then throws the keys to the hospital valet driver. And follows you two inside.
A nurse seeing as Wanda comes in the blood on your pants and the terrified face that Wanda and Nat are wearing. They have never seen you like this before. You have a very high pain tolerance so for you to say it hurts and act like this they know something is very wrong even without the blood. The nurse rolls a gurney over to you three. Wanda tries to place you down on it, but you refuse to let go of her. Your sobs and whimpers are heard by the people around you. The Nurse motions for Wanda to sit down with you on it. The nurse rolls you into an exam room right away as Wanda holds onto you and Nat is behind you rubbing your back. The nurse wants to put in an IV right away, so you let her take your hand and place an IV there. She injects you with some pain medication. As it starts to take effect you pull away from Wanda a bit. The nurse comes back with a monitor that they need to put on to make sure the babies are doing ok.
“Baby I have to get up and you need to lay down. They have to put that monitor on your belly to check the babies.” With tears still rolling down your cheeks you nod your head as Wanda places you beside her and she shuffles off the bed. The nurse comes over lifting up your shirt and placing the monitor on your belly. The doctor comes in as some of the readings are coming out of the monitor. Your eyes have been fluttering shut as you grow tired and you’re in less pain. The doctor looks at the readings before turning to the three of you in the room.
“Your babies are in distress; we are worried that if we wait, we could lose any one of you. We have to take you up now and deliver the babies tonight.” You look at Wanda with fear and tears in your eyes as she grabs your hand squeezing it to reassure you that everything will be ok. “Alright mommy and mama you ready to meet your babies.” The doctor says as they preps to move you to the operating room, and they let Wanda follow.
Wanda conjures up some clean clothes before she puts on the blue covers that they have her wear so that she can be in the OR with you when the babies come. They already have you in the OR when a nurse leads Wanda in and tells her she can stay up by your head. There is a chair that is placed right next to your head as you look at Wanda with sad and fearful eyes. She takes your hand in hers. She wants to kiss your forehead but due to the environment she couldn’t. So, she strokes her thumb over the back of your hand. Soon they have already cut you open and start to deliver the first baby. Wanda peaks over to see what they are doing. She quickly looks back at you not wanting to look anymore. The Doctor then holds your first twin up for you two to see.
“Congratulations on a healthy baby girl.” She cries as you look up with tears in your eyes seeing your first-born child in front of you. The doctor hands her to the nurse. The nurse cleans her up a bit and checks her vitals before placing her on your chest. You look down and hold your beautiful baby girl before looking over to Wanda who is also crying. “We did it.” You mumble tears rolling down your cheeks as you hold onto the little bundle in front of you. “We sure did sweetheart.” Wanda has one hand combing through your hair as her other is placed on top of yours that is holding your daughter.
The sounds of more crying come from just past the sheet that you can’t see past before the doctor holds up your second born. “And a healthy baby boy.” You burst into tears seeing both of your twins here now in front of you. The nurse takes the baby boy from the doctor doing the same as with your baby girl. The nurse walks over to Wanda and hands her the little blue bundle to hold. But before much more can be said your stats plummet. Your arms, eyelids, and whole body feel heavy as your eyes shut and your arms fall to your sides.
Wanda panics as a nurse picks up your baby girl from your chest and another takes your baby boy from Wanda. They start to usher Wanda out of the OR as your health quickly deteriorates. “What’s happening? What’s wrong with my wife?” Wanda pleads as the nurse pushes her towards the door. Wanda is still fighting to look back at you. “Your wife is hemorrhaging, and we need you out of here to save her. So please go now so that we can work. Someone will do a full check up on your twins and bring them back to the room.” The nurse said that was pushing Wanda out the door of the operating room. Another nurse leads Wanda into a room that she suspects is for you and the twins.
Once she enters the room, she spots Nat looking out the window. Nat turns around and sees the tears and the terrified look on Wanda’s face. Wanda runs over to her and throws her arms around her as she begins to sob into the former Russian spy’s shoulder. “Wanda what happened?” Nat gently asked as she rubbed up and down on Wanda’s back. “They rushed me out when she … she started to hemorrhage. This is all my fault she is going to hate me if she even makes it through. She didn’t want to, and I told her everything will be ok, and now look, nothing is ok. I may lose the love of my life.” Wanda sobs. “Wanda none of this is your fault. I assume you're talking about the sex you two had last night cause man was Y/n loud. She would never blame you and as I said before she is way too stubborn to leave you that easily. As for not wanting it, her screaming said otherwise.” Wanda lightly chuckles before pulling back and looking at Nat with a half-smile. “Thank you.” Wanda mumbles. “You don’t ever have to thank me.” Nat smiled back at Wanda.
Just then a nurse rolls in two bassinets and places them next to the window where Wanda and Nat are standing. She quickly leaves the room as Wanda and Nat walk over taking in the two sleeping babies. Wanda goes over to the girl picking her up and handing her over to Nat.
“Azkadellia Chase Maximoff.” Wanda announces her name. “Let me guess Y/n picked her name.” Wanda chuckled, giving the answer that Natasha was looking for. Wanda walks over to the baby boy picking him up in her arms and rocking him. “Billy Pietro Maximoff.” She gives the small boy a watery smile. “And you definitely picked that.” Nat chuckled as she bounced Az in her arms walking closer to Wanda looking at the twins.
A few hours later you are wheeled back into the room and Wanda lets out a sigh of relief seeing you still alive. You're paler than normal and you have a bag of blood hanging above your head. “See I told you she is stubborn.” Nat teased as she sat in the chair reading her book. Wanda rolled her eyes at her friend's comment but nonetheless was happy that you were here and still alive.
A few more hours have passed as you wake up hearing the soft sounds of Wanda singing a Sokovian song. You open your eyes to see her bouncing with a pink and blue bundle in each arm as she sweetly sings to the twins. “I could get used to this.” Your voice comes out horse, but Wanda’s singing stops abruptly when she looks over to see you awake and smiling at her. “Welcome back to the land of the living. Do me a favor and stop trying to die on us.” Nat placed her book down giving you a stern look. You gave her a sheepish grin before turning your attention back to your wife and babies.
Wanda has already made her way over to you with the bundles in tow. Nat helps you sit up more on the bed as Wanda gently sits on the edge of the bed. When you're ready she hands you each bundle to hold in your arms as you look down at your precious twins. “While I was out you didn’t try to change their names, did you?” Wanda pressed her lips as she settled in behind you, wrapping her arm around you and pulling you in close. “Azkadellia Chase Maximoff and Billy Pietro Maximoff.” Wanda gave each twin a small bop on their nose when she said their names. You smile fondly when you remember the conversation on what their names will be. Neither of you wanted to know the genders so you picked out two boy names and two girl names. And if it was one of each you two decided on the first chosen names for the gender. The twins were perfectly happy and healthy even if they were a bit early.
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Soon after you woke up you had a ton of visitors coming to see the two new additions. Peter quickly bursts through the door stopping when he sees you feeding the twins. “Oh shit!” Peter exclaims as he slaps his hand over his face, turning and quickly trying to make it out of the room. Since his hand was thrown over his eyes, he walked smack dab into the door to your room. “Owww!” You laugh as you hear Peter groan. You quickly throw a cover over much to Wanda’s dismay.
“Pete, I’m covered, you don’t have to leave.” Peter slowly walks back, his hand still over his eyes. He opens up his fingers peeking through and seeing that you are covered, dropping his hands. “Warning would be great next time.” Peter said with a sheepish grin. “Pete, you ran into my hospital room, what did you expect? And come on Pete you are 18 now and have a girlfriend, right? I would hope you have seen boobs before.” You smirk at your brother. “I-, I have seen them. It’s just-, it’s just I didn’t want to see my sisters.” You chuckle at how flustered your brother gets.
“It’s ok Peter. But remember this is natural and your niece and nephew need to eat. And anyways their heads were blocking almost everything.” You shake your head with a smile. “I know. I know.” Peter moves closer in the room. “Ow! Fucker! Wanda, I think your son is done now.” Wanda moves to grab Billy from you. “Did you just call our son fucker?” Wanda raises a brow at you. “He bit me. Well more like gummed but I’m still sensitive.” You grumble. “Is that why you called him my son?” Wanda smirks slightly. “Yes.” Wanda rolled her eyes at you as she tried to burp Billy.
“Pete, why don’t you go and get everyone else that is here we have to talk to Nat.” You ask your brother to leave a few minutes wanting to have an important conversation. “Me, what did I do?” Nat questioned putting her book down on the side table. Peter quickly exits the room heading towards the others. “You did everything right.” With Az done feeding you motion for Nat to take her as you put a shirt back on. Nat happily takes Az in her arms. Wanda comes and sits next to you on the bed as you both look at Nat. “We had a very important question to ask you. Natty you have been my best friend and my knight in shining armor.” You get interrupted. “Wait then what am I?” Wanda asks after you call Nat your knight in shining armor. “Baby you are my hope, my love, and the person who has saved me from myself. But back to Nat. You're one of the few people that I trust more than anything. Who has saved me countless times and I would trust with my life to look after our kids. So, we wanted to ask if you would be the twins' godmother.”
Nat looks at you with a bit of shock not expecting the question. She looks down at Az in her arms who gives her a cute coo. “So?” Wanda asks after an extended silence from Nat. Nat looks up with unshed tears in her eyes. “Of course, I will be.” A wide smile grows on yours and Wanda’s face as you look at Nat who is just smiling with a shine in her eyes and looks down at the happy baby in her arms.
Just then the room starts to fill with the Avengers and others that have come to see the twins and to see how you were doing. Maria walks over to Nat who looks up to her with a smile. Maria leans down, placing a kiss on Nat’s lips before she stands behind her. You look over to see Steve, Tony, Pepper, Peter, Aunt May, MJ, Thor, Bruce, Clint, Laura, Bucky, Sam, Rhodey, Carol, and Valkyrie were all standing huddled in the room. “How are you feeling sweet pea?” May asks, moving closer to your side and placing her hand on your leg. “I’m doing ok. Sore but other than that I’m happy. I have two beautiful babies and a super-hot wife.”
There were groans heard around the room. “Seriously Y/n?” Peter groans looking at your smirking face. As Wanda wraps one arm tighter around you as she continues to hold onto Billy. May holds out her hands to Wanda to take Billy from her. Wanda reluctantly hands him over as she wraps you in her arms. “So, who do we have here?” May asks, holding him in her arms. “Billy Pietro Maximoff and Nat is holding Azkadellia Chase Maximoff.” You smile as the names roll off your tongue. The smile on everyone’s faces as they look at your happy little family fills your heart with joy. Everyone stayed around taking turns holding the twins and enjoying the new additions to their ever-growing family.
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that awkward moment when your manager becomes white boy of the month
(inspired by @e-payne's stunning singer/manager payneland au!! the tweets and the spongebob meme are taken from these amazing edits <3)
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monocaelia · 10 months ago
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fragile.
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' you have broken down my defenses, and i don’t really resent it. ' - vita sackville west
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in which you really don't want to care about him and his careless attitude, but you always find yourself coming back to him. always. feat. diluc ragnvindr & gn!reader w.c : 5k warnings : childhood friends to lovers, diluc lore spoilers, minor angst but ends w fluff, diluc ragnvindr. note : happy new year! sorry for the delay hehe, but this is for @seraphiism's 2023 collab event !! please support the other authors and enjoy the fic ^^
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your mother had always instructed you to stay close to her side, to never stray far away from her lest you find yourself in trouble with the master of the winery or the other servants working the orchards and tending to the land of the estate.
but with a beautiful land of ripe grapes and friendly staff greeting you as you rush past them, how could you ever just sit still beside your mother as she did her job around the winery?
the late summer breeze rushes past your face as you weave through the wooden stakes holding the wiry vines of grapes above you. the warm sun rays heat your skin as you leap over the small rocks that litter the passage leading into the main area of the ragnvindr estate. the wind whispers in your ear, making you grin as your little legs take you wherever it guides you.
you feel free, the wind pushing past your wings to lead you to your newest adventure around the manor.
your feet land firmly on the grounds behind the manor when you hear the gentle sniffles coming from behind a couple of barrels. despite your mother's warnings echoing in your head, you take gentle steps towards the sound as curiosity takes over.
you're not expecting to see a young boy with fiery red hair and matching eyes that hold the warmest, flickering fire glaring up at you with tears at the corner of his eyes and holding a bleeding knee.
"...are you okay?" you ask, kneeling down beside him. you begin to frown when he pulls his knee away from you and his glare deepens.
"i don't need your help," the young boy hisses at you and you roll your eyes.
"really? you don't need my help even though you're crying in a corner all by yourself?" you scoff at him. he doesn't say anything in retaliation and you take it as an okay for you to help him.
you pull a handkerchief from your pocket; nothing too fancy as your family couldn't afford the finest silks like the nobles could. it's cotton, white, and had a simple design of a little sparrow emroidered in the corner.
"i don't have any bandages on me," you mumble softly. your little fingers gently wrap the handkerchief around the young boy's knee several times before tying a small knot on it. without even blinking, you lean down to kiss the wounded knee.
"what are you doing?!" the young boy exclaims, yanking his knee away.
"kissing it better," you say as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. "my mother always does that when i get hurt. she says it takes the pain away and makes it heal faster."
"that's stupid," the boy mumbles with a glare.
"says the one who tripped and fell and hurt himself," you argue back. you stick your tongue out when the boy shouts out a 'hey!' and roll your eyes.
"who are you and what are you doing here anyways?" you ask the young boy, kneeling beside him once more. he's still glaring at you, but it's less hostile than it was a few moments ago. "my mom said strangers aren't allowed to be here."
the young boys eyes are red, vibrantly so. the life in them burn brightly, reminding you of a fire as it flickers with warmth and a promise of a brighter tomorrow. like the hearth of a fireplace, the young boy seems to be the incarnate of warmth itself with the way he's filled with the flame of life.
"i live here, dummy," he quips back at you with a frown and your eyes widen.
"really? i've never seen you around, and i've been everywhere on this estate," you reply, bringing your thumb and forefinger to your chin as you remain deep in thought. truly, the only people you've managed to catch were all adults working for the master of this winery. never once have you seen a kid running along.
with a bright smile of your own, you lean towards the young boy. "we should be friends! since i don't know anyone else to play with here, we can play!"
the boy looks you up and down with furrowed brows, but he slowly nods. "...okay," he mumbles and you grin brighter.
"great! what's your name then? i'm-"
your name is shouted as hurried footsteps rush towards you. your mother pulls you aside as she looks at the young boy in front of you with panicked eyes.
"young master, i'm so sorry if my child said or did anything to hurt you," your mother says in a rush. she pushes your head down to bow in front of the young boy. she hisses something into your ear and you stutter out your own apology too, even if you did nothing wrong.
you find out the young boy you helped earlier that day was the son of the nobleman your mother works for, diluc ragnvindr. apparently, he's some big deal because he's the young master, but what kind of big deal hurts himself and hides between the barrels instead of asking for help?
you huff as you kick your feet sitting down by your bedside. because of the whole debacle, your mother had ordered you to stay inside to prevent even more debacles from happening even if you explained that the young master getting injured was not your fault. the sun shining from your windowsill feels so far away as you stare outside and ponder what to do.
until you hear a light pattering sound come from your window.
your curiosity is piqued as your small frame approaches the glass panes, wide eyes peeking over the wooden frame as your eyes scan the scenery.
the foliage of the trees surrounding your home cast shadows over your house with small animals running back and forth from the greenery above, causing the rustling of the leaves. the sun trickles in through the gaps of the leaves and your eyes settle on the boy with red hair standing outside your window, a small rock in his hand.
there's a proper bandage on his knee now as it was properly dressed, and his fiery eyes meet yours. he looks hesitant at first, but his brows furrow and his lips open to prepare to speak.
"...come outside and play with me," he tells you when you push open the window in your bedroom, a slight pout in his voice.
"you got me in trouble," you reply shortly, "and now i'm stuck inside because of you."
the young boy bites his lip, pondering what he could do or say to make things better. from the way he's thinking hard enough for you to see steam coming out of his ears, you could tell that he was trying really hard to think of anything to say.
"i'm sorry," he mumbles, kicking the dirt with his shoe.
"sorry, what was that?" you ask, holding your ear out.
the young master huffs, his cheeks puffed out in annoyance. he stomps his foot before-
"i said 'i'm sorry'!"
you smile at him smugly before crossing your arms on the windowsill. it was amusing to see the supposed young master like this; for such a renowned young boy, he was such a cry baby.
"okay, i can't go outside, but we can still play inside if that's okay," you tell him with a bright smile. "i'll let you in!"
"diluc..." he says, red eyes meeting yours. he reminds you of a fire with the way he's looking at you; so full of life but almost burning you if you get him too riled up. but the flames are tame now compared to the anxious flickers you saw earlier before he apologized.
"okay; i'll let you in then, diluc!"
ever since that warm summer, you and diluc have been inseparable; every afternoon is spent exploring the land of the winery but never straying far enough to get lost or end up on the other side of the lake where monsters lurk.
you were there the evening master crepus brought home another young boy around your age home; his blue hair reminding you of the blueberries your mother bought from mondstadt for you to eat. it was a bit of an adjustment with another young boy to play with, but soon you got along well with him as well.
his bright blue eyes always sparkling as you invite him to play alongside diluc and his little hand held in yours. he reminded you of the stars above with the way his eyes twinkle with youth and reflect the night sky above you when the three of you snuck out of your homes to stargaze with your hands holding onto each other until the morning sun began to rise over the horizon.
with your hands held tightly with diluc's and kaeya's, your youth together was only just beginning.
it's a cool morning where the early frost is beginning to melt as the sun continues to rise over the horizon, spreading her warmth and love across the fields of dawn winery. the young master has been gone for a couple days now; something about some sort of knight exam or whatever happening in the city of mondstadt. you would have gone with him, but your duties lie in caring for the winery whilst your friends head off to the heart of mondstadt to finish their training and hopefully become part of the knights of favonius that crepus ragnvindr had always encouraged them to be a part of.
you know having their father's praise meant a lot to your dear friends and you could only hope for the best for both diluc and kaeya as they were off doing their duties.
your ears perk as your name is shouted through the winery along with the sound of hooves rapidly against the dirt road. over in the distance, you can make out a red haired young man galloping over on his steed at near full speed. with wide eyes, you try to tell him to slow down before you get trampled and-
"oof!" you groan as a heavy body slams into you, both his weight and warmth tackling you to the ground. you're thankful that his arms cradled your head as you both go tumbling into the dirt road underneath you and the only pain was that of your body against the floor.
you don't even get to question why diluc had tackled you to the floor when he pulls his face away from you, giving you a clear view of his expression. he's smiling brightly, a wide grin on his face and his eyes of rubies twinkling brighter than any flame you've ever seen. the flames of his soul flicker brilliantly in his excitement and you can't help your own match his energy.
"i got in!" diluc says, his boyish smile growing wider. the small divots in his cheeks are cute and evidence of how hard he was grinning at the news. "i passed the trials got to do the oath swear and- oh, i wish you could've been there!"
despite growing up into a more mature-ish teen, it is moments like these where you're reminded that even as time passes and he grows taller than you, diluc is still the bright eyed boy that you've known since you were young. he looks so cute, in an endearing way, when he eagerly tells you all about his trials and how tough they were.
you really hope that the young master stays the same as he is now.
with a gentle hand, you reach up to ruffle his hair; it's soft to the touch and your eyes don't miss the way diluc pauses in his excitement as your fingers weave into his hair. you assume it's because he's not used to your praise and brush it off, even as he leans into your touch and waits for your words.
"why don't we head inside first? i want to hear everything that happened, but inside where it's warm and comfortable rather than on the dirt floor, diluc," you say to him, a slight lilt in your voice. you laugh softly when you see his cheeks flush a little in embarrassment before he gets off of you.
"i apologize, i was just so eager to tell you," diluc says softly, reaching down to offer a hand to you. you take his hand; you can feel the natural warmth emanating from his body through his gloves and, before you know it, you've been pulled up from the ground. his arm wraps around your waist to assure that you're balanced as you stand up.
"i just," diluc begins. you watch him as the young master of the winery averts his gaze briefly before he meets yours, warm rubies enveloping you with nothing but the comfort he holds for you ever since you were both younger.
"i wanted you to be the first person i told and to tell you."
a wave of something pleasant washes over you knowing that diluc, the heir of dawn winery and one of the most hardworking and talented man in all of mondstadt, rushed back home on horseback in the early hours of this chilly morning just to announce the news to you in person.
just so he could be your first in regards to his good news.
you laugh softly as something warm settles into the pit of your heart, squeezing his hand in yours as you tug him towards the main mansion of the winery estate with no intentions of letting his go for the time being.
even with the budding flowers of youth begin to bloom and the happiness that was promised to you has yet to come, you would have never expected for the spring of your youth to end so abruptly.
it happened all so quickly; crepus ragnvindr wielding a delusion, his death and the anger of diluc exploding, and the fall of your friendship with kaeya and diluc.
you weren't given the details of either one's situation, just a witness of a near death experience and the unforgiven apologies spewing from kaeya's lips as he held his injured eye in the midst of the rain washing down on them as if mourning both the loss of crepus ragnvindr and the wound wedged deep between the relationship of the ragnvindr brothers.
it was like in a mere second, the once warm diluc that would blush and hold your hand so delicately had been wiped away and replaced by a diluc grieving the loss of his father as the flames of his anger and betrayal of both his own brother and the knights of favonius for trying to brush the murder of his father under the rug explode and engulf his entire being.
he doesn't even give you a proper goodbye, leaving only a letter dedicated to you and his vision dimly glowing on his nightstand behind.
it feels like a fever dream when you hear the news of diluc finally returning after all of these years. you don't even hear it from the man himself; rather, from the whispers and excited chatter that the master of dawn winery had returned home.
part of you is excited at the news that he's alive; with no news of his existence after he ran from home in search of the truth behind his father's death other than the faint glow and warmth radiating from his vision clutched in your hands when you missed and worried for him, you were ecstatic knowing that he truly was home now.
that he's alive and breathing and still with you.
and yet, another part of you twinges in pain that he didn't come to you and announce that he was home. he had left you without even a single goodbye, not even bothering to visit you and explain his situation before leaving you questioning whether or not he even cared about how you felt about him.
of course, you aren't entitled to being the first to know, but after growing up together and usually being the first to know of everything in your youth, your heart aches knowing you were one of the last to hear of this at the winery.
it doesn't help knowing that you have not even caught a glimpse of diluc after his supposed return.
so imagine your surprise coming home one evening, the cool night air biting against your skin as you return home after a long day's work, seeing a figure leaning against your home.
at first, your blood turns cold as your heart races in your ears; it couldn't be anyone bad... the winery is a safe place and any suspicious figures are dealt with accordingly before they even step close to the winery grounds. you don't even have anything to defend yourself against if they did happen to be someone with malicious intent.
you take a step back to turn tail back to the estate but freeze when you begin to recognize the figure outside your door; red curls resembling that of flames flickering in the air and warm ruby eyes that you could recognize anywhere. despite standing in the dim evening light and having only the glow of the lantern outside of your home, you could make out the injuries through his dark clothing.
just what did he get himself into?
you hesitate at first, but eventually let your instincts take control as you begin to walk over to your home. it's as if you were both in the blooming stages of your youth again, bringing diluc home to mend his wounds after training for the knight exams.
caring for him was like muscle memory to you, even after all of the events leading to him leaving you in the dust.
you don't say a word as you open the wooden door and guide diluc in, pulling out a chair by the fireplace. wordlessly, he sits in it as you leave to prepare to clean his wounds.
your fingers shake ever so slightly as you remove diluc's coat from his shoulders, the heavy fabric falling to the floor with a thud. you apologize softly as you begin to unbutton his shirt and, as each button is undone and reveals more of his skin, your fingers begin to flinch every time your skin brushes against the skin of his chest.
his breath is warm, you can feel it against your skin as you slide off the remaining clothes on his torso. his chest is bare to you, and normally you would be gawking at how much he has physically changed since you were younger. but you cannot help but stare at how much he had been injured in the last few years you have seen him.
aside from the scratches from the most recent scuffle which led him to your quaint home beside his manor, scars litter his chest and arms. although most of them are healed, the damage that he had experienced was still evident on his skin and you hold back a gasp at how deep some of them had been; there's a huge scar that runs diagonally from the top of his chest to his stomach and you could already feel your stomach churning at the pain.
you couldn't imagine having to sustain those injuries for so long, and being alone through it all.
and, now, you hope that the injuries currently on his body heal faster knowing that he isn't alone this time. not when he has you by his side.
diluc's eyes burn holes into your skull as he watches you dip a towel into the bucket of warm water at your side; you pretend to ignore him. twisting the soaked cloth to rid it of the excess water, you gently begin to clean the wounded man in front of you.
a man you consider an old friend, but you fear he doesn't hold the same sentiment. not anymore.
it's quiet, the only sound shared between the two of you being the occasional sound of the towel dumped back into the bucket and the crackling of the fireplace in your living space. the moon casts her illuminating rays through the window of your home, but her light is nothing compared to the comfort of the fire in your home.
the comfort of the man in front of you, even if you didn't want to ever admit it to him now.
the glass jars containing the disinfecting ointment for diluc's wounds clink gently as you open them to spread over his skin.
"why are you helping me?" his voice breaks the thick silence between you two. his sudden question makes your hands pause, but you don't raise your head as you think of something to reply.
"and let an old friend bleed to death outside my door? you think i'm that heartless, diluc?" you ask him. your fingers resume their previous job of slathering the medicine over his new wounds. "i could say the same to you, why show up to my house like this?"
another silence follows your words and you assume he's done interrogating you for your kindness to him.
"i had nowhere else to turn to," diluc says after a while. your eyes catch his fists tighten on his lap as he takes another breath. "you've shown me nothing but kindness even after i was so cruel to you."
you exhale softly at his words. of course he thinks dealing with his own problems this entire time was the worst thing he could do to you. if you were being honest, it did hurt when he seemingly pretended you didn't exist or pushed you away when he had returned home from whatever he was dealing with away from mondstadt.
you had hoped for a joyful reunion, one filled with tears as you finally welcome home your old friend. but he never announced when he was coming home and you only figured out through the grapevine. he was never home when you looked for him and when you finally caught a glimpse of him, your eyes would meet for barely a second before he rushed off elsewhere and leaving you in the dust.
according to kaeya, his brother whom you've kept in touch with throughout the years. diluc had changed even more ever since his return; he kept his feelings to himself and his face remained 'constipated,' as per kaeya's words, due to his inner turmoil.
but from everyone else, he had always been so kind to them. the old women in the city would always praise how gentle the young master was, helping them walk across the city or carrying their groceries if they needed it. the young women also constantly swooned over how mysterious, yet warm-hearted diluc was; seemingly cold in nature but treating children and animals with such tenderness.
"it did hurt knowing you were ignoring me," you confess as your fingers begin to unravel the gauze to wrap over his wounds. "even if you wanted everyone to think you've changed and have become cold and guarded, i know you're still the same caring boy i've known since we were young. i hope so, at least."
his skin is warm to the touch, another feature you realize has never changed about your old friend. with bated breath, you lift your head to let your gaze finally settle on diluc's own. just as you predicted, despite the physical changes, you can still see the diluc you once knew within the scarred and older man in front of you.
diluc has definitely gotten older; the baby fat on his face slimming down slightly to reveal a more defined jaw and the bags under his eyes were evidence of his restless nights away from mondstadt. there are light scars on his face, nothing too deep to keep from his princely demeanor but are definitely proof of a troubling journey, and he has grown taller than the last time you had seen him in your youth.
but one thing that has never changed is the fire the lights up his eyes. so red and warm, you're tempted to hold his face in your hands to get a closer look. they're so vibrant, alive like the embers that flicker in the fireplace that lights your home, as they stare back at you in anticipation of your next words.
"you would never intend to hurt me on purpose. so if i should have to wait forever for you to be ready to come to me like you've had in the past, i don't mind doing so."
diluc's stoic expression wavers at your words. a sliver of guilt shines in his eyes and he looks away briefly as he digests the words you've spoken to him.
he couldn't tell you the reasons why he always kept you at arm's length; was he wary of your intentions for always being kind to him despite how he treated you or was he so used to people close to him lying to his face that he feared you were also pulling a facade?
or was he scared of you sharing the same fate as his family should he loved you with his heart on his sleeve, a fate of being held in his arms as he feels the warmth that once comforted him when you were young fade away like the embers in the hearth of a fireplace?
diluc did not want to know and he did not need to know, not when you're looking at him with such trust and compassion that he finds it hard to even hold any distrust towards you.
his dear friend from his youth who was always there to pick him up when he fell.
you did not break through the walls shielding diluc's heart for you had already found your place beside it, holding he's life with your gentle hands and protecting his soul's flames with your faith in him.
"i'm sorry," diluc apologizes to you, looking into your eyes. one of your hands is grabbed to be held by him, rough and scarred and so calloused as it held the memories and grief of what he went through to become like the man in front of you, the gauze held in your other. his warmth seeps into your skin, heating up your skin as the flames of his heart grow and encase your entire being within its embrace.
your lips part to say something, but he continues to speak.
"i thought keeping you away would benefit us both," he takes a breath as his eyes scan over your own features, taking in all that has changed since the last time he saw you in your adolescent years; how much you've grown both physically and emotionally. you look so much more mature than the naughty child who ran around breaking their mother's rules just to play with him or the dear friend who would bicker with him endlessly during their teenage years.
the years of their beautiful youth, years that he wished so dearly he could go back to and live in that peace for eternity.
but while the winds continue to blow and move time along, you've continued to stay the same despite the change.
you're still so kind, so inviting to someone like him.
you treat him like the friend you've remembered in your adolescence, even if his hands were bloodied with vengeance and his heart is scarred and wounded from betrayal and deceit.
he is still diluc, just diluc in your bright and beautiful eyes; he always had been.
his hands squeeze yours tightly, hoping that he has the courage to say what he wants to say.
"i don't deserve your kindness, or your love. but if i imagine a life where i have succeeded in pushing you away and we no longer talk," diluc begins, the fire in his eyes wavering as they hold your gaze.
"i don't think i would ever want to live a life where you're not in it."
diluc's words shake you to your core; it's something you wouldn't expect him to say now after all these years. as much as you want to immediately forgive him and push back the years of agony, waiting for any sign that he was alive while leaving his vision behind, or even watching as he ignores you despite being home after all these years, your heart aches knowing knowing he even did this to you in the first place.
"how can i know that you won't leave me like you did?" your voice is small despite being so close to him. in fear of having him see how much his actions have affected you, you face tilts down to your lap to avoid his gaze. "i can't just wait for you forever, it hurts sitting here all these years with a promise i don't even know if you'll keep."
you take a shaky breath as you speak again.
"you didn't even say goodbye."
your voice breaks as you say those words and you can feel the burning sensation as the tears threaten to spill over your eyes.
there's a moment of silence between the two of you before you hear him gently call out your name. his free hand reaches up to cup your face, tentatively guiding you to face him. he says your name again, softly as if even saying your name too harshly would cause you to break, and you hesitantly meet his gaze.
there's a tenderness that you recognize deep in those fiery pools in his eyes, one that flickers like the hearth of your fireplace and suddenly you feel like you're experiencing the most beautiful yet fleeting moment in life once more. diluc's thumb gently presses against your cheek to wipe away any tears that overflowed from your already wet eyes.
his pinky links with your own, a childish thing to do but one that you still hold dear to your own heart.
a promise between the two of you bathed in firelight and your youth reflected back at you in the shape of the young man sitting before you.
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