#my stomach hurts and is so messed up I might not be able to sleep Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[fitzfunnymoments]

WHY ARE YOU SILLY!!!!!!! 🤯🤯🤯🤯

[hello-sweetheart]

You know that trope where Person A thinks Person B is just being nice but they’re actually flirting. What about the opposite? Person A misreading their behavior and being the only one falling impossibly in love.

Clumsy in Love Part 3

Adiel had already gone to bed by the time he heard frantic knocking at his door. He stumbled through his apartment hazy with sleep, a hand stretched out to guide him through the dark until he reached his living room. The lights were blinding to his eyes.

“Adiel?” Came the muffled voice through the through the door. “Can…can I come in please?”

Dread washed over him quick and ugly, churning his stomach as his shaking hands unlatched the locks. Had something happen? Was Eddie hurt? Or—

He hesitated to unlock the last latch. Was Eddie drunk? No, he shook his head. Eddie doesn’t… he doesn’t drink, not like that. He doesn’t get…like that. Not like his ex.

“Adiel?” It was softer now, and he finally opened the door.

“Eddie?”

His voice was still rough from his abrupt wakening, but he looked over quickly checking for anything really. When he couldn’t find anything, his shoulders finally loosened.

“Hey,” Eddie smiled a little crooked and forced, “I’m sorry for waking you.”

“It’s cool. Come inside, are you okay? It’s,” a brief glance at his digital watch, “it’s two in the morning, Eddie.”

They shuffled inside and Adiel locked the door behind him. Guiding Eddie to the kitchen as he flicked on a couple more lights.

“I know, I know. I’ve just been,” he gestured vaguely and his rings caught the warm tones of the lights, “driving around. For a while. Uh, my heads just been a mess today and I…”

“And?”

Adiel encouraged him softly.

Eddie, always so unapologetically himself and taking up space in any room he’s in, looks unsure. He looks away, eyes a bit hooded from exhaustion, he thinks. Sadness, maybe.

He has to guide Eddie’s hand away from where he’s begun to wear down his thumb nail again. A habit that he sure Eddie’s picked up from him.

“And, I wanted to see you.”

His heart might actually sore inside him.

“Well,” he offers a cheeky grin and spins on his toes until he’s facing him again, “you have me.”

“Yeah, I have you.” The words carry weight to them. Adiel’s cheeks flush with warmth.

“You do. Come, let’s go put you bed. You don’t have to say anything until you’re ready.”

Having Eddie is his bed always feels like the world to him. It’s one of the only moments when his mind is able to still, thoughts silent. All his worries are gone when he has Eddie in his arms.

It not just when they’re being intimate (‘canoodling’, he says because he likes to make Ed groan), it’s about having him in his space and still feeling safe. Safer, even. And it’s unlike anything he’s been able to feel in his past relationships.

Safe. Being open and vulnerable and still falling asleep next to someone. Eddie coming here at night, because he feels safe enough to be vulnerable, too.

Adiel always falls too fast and too hard, but he just feels so much. Too much. And they only had a couple months together now, but he can feel himself falling. Not there yet. But he could, soon. It’s as if he’s bracing for the impact of it all.

“You’re still awake.”

“I need to tell you something. I can’t sleep until I do.”

Adiel hums.

“Earlier today, or, yesterday I guess. I was at Steve’s house and… he kissed me.”

The night is so silent, even in the city.

“Did, did you want to kiss him?”

“He kissed me. He surprised me and…I didn’t kiss him back. I wouldn’t do that to you, Adiel.”

He gathers Eddie in his arms, his chest against Eddie’s back, and burrows deep into the nape of his neck.

“I know, baby. I’m sorry that he kissed you.”

“He’s my friend. An unlikely one, but one of the best that I have. I don’t want to lose that. I can’t. I, I owe him my life.”

“No.”

“I do. I’m only here because of—“

“I know what he did for you and I’m so grateful you’re still here, Eddie. I don’t want to imagine a world with you. But if he’s as good as a friend as you’ve said he is, then he wouldn’t want you to feel like you owe him anything.”

“You’re right. I don’t mean it that way. Just that… he’s important to me. And I don’t want to let it go.”

“Give him time then, and space. He’ll need it right now and you’ll have to respect his boundaries.” Like he didn’t respect ours. He nuzzles deeper and breathes in his scent it’s thick with sandalwood.

“I feel like it’s my fault that he feels this way.”

“Can’t make anyone feel anything they don’t want to.”

“When did you get so wise?” He laughs.

“Hush, baby. We both need some sleep.”

“You’re the best among men, Adiel. Goo’night.”

“Night, Ed.”

He’s burning with jealousy, but he can keep it tucked away. Steve means something to him. And that’s what he’s afraid of right now.

He tightens his arms around Eddie, being selfish with his warmth.

I just found you, he kisses his shoulder, I can’t lose you.

———

Something changes after that night. It’s not noticeable right away, his friends don’t notice, but Adiel does. He notices everything about Eddie, even the finer details.

He doesn’t mention Steve anymore, at least not to him. And Adiel doesn’t know if this is a good thing or not.

He didn’t notice how much Eddie talked about Steve until he stopped.

He has these moments in between their kisses and conversations where he… gets lost, for a lack of a better word. His eyes carry this far away look and Adiel know he’s not here with him.

He kisses him back to him until his eyes are alight again and smiling enough to show off his one crooked canine.

When will his kisses stop being enough? Will Eddie simply float away from him, like a cherished red balloon escaping the grasp of a small child, only able to watch it go.

He tries to hold onto him tighter. His hand interlocked with his, squeezing and rubbing his thumb on Eddie’s knuckles just to make sure he doesn’t float away.

He doesn’t want to hold too tight that he suffocates him, but he can’t help it.

I can’t lose you, I…

There are many things he loves about Eddie that he can list off, but the one this that makes him different is how he doesn’t care about Adiel’s strangeness.

His timid demeanor that he never grew out of. His constant need to be reassured. His laugh, more of giggle that gets him strange looks. His restless fingers and chewed, painted nails down to a stump.

All things he’s been called effeminate for.

Targeted, pushed aside, excluded…

Eddie takes all these traits and kisses them one by one. Nurturing them. Loving them. Seeking them.

Eddie makes him feel like man, instead of questioning his masculinity. He’s even painted his nails for him and didn’t bat an eye when he asked for baby purple instead of the assumed black.

“Baby, do you mean lavender?”

“Oh my god, shut up! If it’s called baby pink why can’t it be called baby purple. Stop laughing!”

Eddie makes him feel like it’s all okay. That he’s okay.

And everything, everything will be okay, too.

Until it wasn’t.

———

Eddie didn’t stop making him feel loved or cared for, but it felt different than from before that night. Today has feeling to it. Like the end.

He keeps stalling against the inevitable.

“Adiel—“

“Let’s watch movie? You can sleep here again and I’ll make breakfast for dinner,” because Eddie doesn’t like savory foods after dark, “I have a couple new tapes to choose from—“

“Baby.”

Baby purple.

No, no, no. His hands are shaking again.

“You know, don’t you? That it’s the end for us?Adiel, I wish we could’ve been different,” He holds his shaking hands and Adiel focuses on them instead of meeting his eyes. It’s been a long time coming, doesn’t mean he feels prepared.

“Have you been… seeing him?” It’s the first time since that night that they’ve talked about Steve. His hands are squeezed tight.

“No! God, I would never go behind your back. I haven’t talked to him since then, I promise. I’ve been giving him space, trying to let him come around on his own time, but…”

“But you miss him.”

His world is falling apart.

“Have you been in love with him this whole time? That day in the music store, did you like him then too?”

“No. Maybe? I, I really don’t know. I don’t think I ever saw him that way. I didn’t even consider it a possibility until he—“

“Yeah, until he fucking kissed you!” He pulls his hands away and doesn’t miss the fact that Eddie didn’t try to hold onto them.

“Until he kissed me.”

Why must it hurt this much?

It always hurts so much.

His body is shaking but he avoids any attempts of Eddie trying to comfort him. Can’t bear the way he looks at him scared and careful like he’s trying to calm a wild animal.

Everything was perfect.

They could’ve been perfect,

If it hadn’t been for one fucking kiss from some guy that can’t stay out of people’s relationships.

“He’s stealing you away and you’re letting him!”

“He’s not stealing me, Adiel! You can’t steal people away like that, they have to be willing to go.”

“Willing to leave me?”

“I’m sorry.”

“I love you, Eddie.” It’s a dirty trick to say it here and now, but it doesn’t make it any less true. Adiel needs to say it. Needs Eddie to know.

Some sick part of him enjoys the hurt look that crosses Eddie’s face, but it’s not close to feeling vindicated.

“I fucking love you, Ed.” He whispers it this time.

“I… I loved you, Adiel. Wish I could’ve loved you longer.”

“It’s been months since he kissed you. He might not even like you that way anymore.” Might not love you the way I can. “I don’t understand, how can you throw away everything for a maybe?”

“It wouldn’t be fair for any of us if I stayed. I know I’ve been absent minded, know that you could tell that I didn’t have my all in us anymore. You deserve someone who doesn’t make feel that way. Adiel. I don’t have any right to ask, but can you you try to understand—“

“Then don’t ask! You shouldn’t! I don’t want to hear about what you think that I deserve. Just, just leave. Please.”

“…Will you be okay?”

“No, but I’ll have to be. Go, Eddie, I’m not yours to worry over anymore.”

He doesn’t know how long he stays on the kitchen floor. His head hurts, his heart feels empty. His nose won’t stop running no matter how many times he wipes away the snot with his sleeve.

He must look like a mess. Look unattractive.

Adiel feels unattractive.

He didn’t even notice the sound of someone unlocking the door and step in until familiar arms are around him. He’s engulfed immediately in warmth and the scent of coconut. Vanilla.

A humorless laugh escapes him, Eddie must have called her.

“I love him, Tiff. There’s something wrong with me.”

“Oh babe, no. No. Nothing is wrong with you.” She rocks him in her arms, tucking him into her neck. Her signature afro puffs tickle his nose. The same hairstyle she’s kept since they were kids.

“Just haven’t met the one right?”

“You’ll find them, babe. You still have us. You still have me. Now and until the next life.”

“‘Til the next life, Tiff.” A pinky promise as old as time.

He curls further into her and not for the first time he wishes that they were straight. That they could feel that way about each other.

Life would have been so much easier.

They would have had much less heartbreaks, and maybe, he wouldn’t have been so broken.

Part 2 < 💛 > Part 4

[drefear]

Daddy Issues Part 2

Best Friend’s Dad!Miguel x Reader

TW: a lot of angst, a lot of sad, a little bit of fluff, jealousy, smut p in v, oral (m and f receiving) awkward shit between Gabi and you and Miguel.

AN: ok here it is! Part 2 is here and now I can focus on HTTK so here ya go :)

Part 1

Weeks. You’d been avoiding Miguel for weeks.

Every day, you thought about that night. The way he touched you, spoke to you, held you. You had sex before, sure, but that… that was next level. A different world.

That was intimacy.

You cried almost every day. He had tried calling you a few times, but you never answered. The whole event felt too painful and your heart couldn’t take it.

Gabi came over and you told her a story that you had met some guy and he swept you off your feet, but he was controlling and had a temper. She sympathized and held you as you cried and that made everything so much worse. How could you do this to her? Sleep with her dad and lie to her? You had to be the worst friend in the world.

During this time, you had finally moved out of your and Gabi’s apartment, and spent some time back with your dad while looking for a new apartment and getting some auditions.

As you sat on the couch and shoved popcorn in your mouth, your eyes still watered and burned. Some gross love story was on and it made you sad once more, the lingering heaviness in your body coming to the forefront of your mind.

The doorbell could be heard and you got up to answer it, not giving a damn that you were in baggy sweats and a big sweater. Swinging open the door, your eyes froze.

“M-Miguel?” You sputtered, seeing him stand awkwardly at your door. “What are you-“

“Miguel!” Your dad cheered and hugged his friend, pulling him inside past your shocked frame. “We’re having a family night again. You used to love those, hon!” Your dad continued and Gabi stepped inside with her boyfriend. You nodded and followed.

Wonderful.

You moved close to your best friend and sat on the couch, Gabi rubbing your arm comfortingly as she tried to make you feel better. The second Miguel looked at your small frame, face stained with tears and a bit puffy from crying, he hated it. And it wasn’t like you were enjoying it either. All of your emotions started to come up in your throat like nausea.

The guilt you felt about lying to Gabi, the anger you felt towards him making you feel-

How did he make you feel?

Angry. But also… sad. And amazing.

You couldn’t deny the whole experience was almost otherworldly.

You got up abruptly and mumbled a quick “I’ll go make something,” before hurrying into the kitchen.

Miguel moved to follow you before Gabi caught his arm.

“Don’t. She might snap at you.”

Miguel nodded, “that’s ok, she can if she wants to.” And with that, he continued.

You stood, turning on the oven to put in some cookies. You loved baking cookies. They were soft and warm, like a hug. You could really use a hug.

“Mi cielo…” his voice had that same effect as he spoke while you stared ahead at the tray of dough.

“Go away.” Is all you could say without turning into a sobbing mess. His hand found your shoulder and you spun around fast, stepping out of his vicinity. “I said go away.” You repeated and heaved, the upset building in you wildly.

He clenched his jaw, “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“This is not the time or place to do this, Miguel. My dad and my best friend- your daughter is in the room right next to us. If they hear this, neither of them will forgive us.”

The words coming out of your mouth made your hands tremble and your stomach sick. How could you have let this happen?

You turned your head and moved to check on the cookies. “We need to act like nothing happened.”

“But I-“

“No. Nothing happened.” You repeated and he swallowed the lump in his throat.

“I’d like to talk about this another time, because while you have nothing to say, I do. And I’d like it if you'd hear me out.” His words made your mouth dry as you just sighed and nodded, not able to even answer. Your brain was fried, you felt ambushed. You knew your dad was just trying to cheer you up, but he had made this so much worse for tonight. To sit in a room with two people you lied to and the person your heart aches for the most, yearns to touch and hold and love. But that could never happen. He was best friends dad, he was supposed to be like family.

Once he exited the kitchen, you let a few silent tears fall. The conflict inside of you was roaring like a storm at sea.

You’d finally found an apartment, a place by your dance agency that had a beautiful view of the city. It was absolutely perfect. Cute little kitchen, a master bedroom and a big closet, everything was a dream. You signed those papers and paid everything upfront, having saved a lot from sharing an apartment with Gabi.

Moving in was easy, since you didn’t have a lot of furniture and your dad said he’d help you out. He planned a fun day of helping you move in.

And he invited Miguel and Gabi.

Yay.

As you saw your father standing in your new doorway, your arms swung around his neck. “Thank you, dad.” You couldn’t help but be giddy about it all.

Gabi was behind him, and behind her was… Miguel. You hugged Gabi and gave Miguel a polite smile, mumbling a “hi Mr. O’Hara,” and pulling in Gabi to show her around.

The men started to carry in the big furniture, including the couch your father bought you as a gift and the bedframe you got at an antique shop. You plopped down on the mattress and spread out your arms, staring up at the ceiling. This was the beginning of your true freedom, your independence.

Someone clearing their throat stirred you out of your daze and you leaned up on your elbows to see Miguel. You just huffed. “The boxes are all in the living room.” He said and you nodded, “your dad brought some food and beers, said we should all break in your new place together.”

“Of course he did.” You murmured and bit your lip in frustration, trying not to be so rude. “Fine.”

An hour later and you were still stone cold sober, not having even a sip of a beer and only drinking water. Miguel was still nursing his first beer as Gabi and your dad had already made it to their second.

“So, Miguel!” Your dad smiled, leaning on a knee, “how’s the girlfriend?” Your body stiffened and your eyes stayed trained on the water bottle in your hand.

“Ah, she’s not my girlfriend, it’s not serious.” He went on and you began to drown him out. You didn’t want to hear any of this, you just wanted to be alone in your new apartment.

“Come on, man. Six months and still no title?”

“Six months?” You gapped and everyone turned to you, making you glance around and realize your error. “I-I’m just shocked, is all… that’s a long time to not have some sort of commitment… or loyalty.” Your eyes flickered to his and a slight bit of hurt and anger tinged his features, still trying to play it off as if he was unbothered.

“Like I said, it’s not serious. But it feels nice to be with someone mature…” he leaned back and took a long swig of his beer, eyes never breaking from yours. You tightened the grip on the bottle in your hands and then looked back to your dad.

“Sorry dad, didn’t realize you were the only single person in the room now.” Your smile was normal and sweet to everyone else, as if you were teasing your father, but Miguel saw through it. This was a competition now, a challenge.

“You have a boyfriend?” His voice was meant to sound relaxed, but it was a bit harsh.

“Oh no no, it’s casual. Just hanging out.” You shrugged, “men are really just a distraction right now, ya know? They all just want one thing, and I’m not into the whole ‘multiple women’ vibe. Men who entertain more than one woman at a time are disgusting. Pigs, really.” You went on about this and his mouth found the bottle once more, tipping it back and downing the rest. He immediately moved to pop open another and you smirked.

You, 1. Miguel, 0.

He was quiet the rest of the night, listening to Gabi and your father trade stories as you laughed along and gave snarky comments. When the night was finally over, you wished everyone goodbye and were about to shut the door when a hand stopped you.

“Forgot something.” Miguel’s voice said from the hallway and you found yourself being pushed backwards by him opening the door wider. He closed it behind himself and his eyes glared into yours with fury you recognized once before.

“So, a new guy?” He spit out and you stayed quiet. No words came out and this made him angrier. “What? Nothing else to say? You sure had a hell of a lot to say before, why not now?”

“You’re drunk, Mr. O’Hara-“

“Cut it with the ‘Mr. O’Hara’ bullshit.” He barked and you flinched, “you’re seeing some fuckin twerp now?”

“You have a girlfriend.” You spat back at him and he rolled his eyes.

“She’s not my girlfriend, we’re just-“

“Six months. You’ve been seeing her, taking her to dinner, seducing her for six months. That’s a relationship!” You shouted at him and Miguel’s eyes just fell to the floor. “Just get out, I don’t owe you an explanation. I can see whoever I want, I can fuck around and be a whore if I really wanted to! It’s none of your business!”

“You’re mine, so it’s my business.”

“No I’m not.” You yelled and he grew still. The heavy tension fell on your shoulders and your tears spilled down your cheeks, the breath in your lungs burning from inhaling too hard. The two of you stared at each other for a bit before you whispered, “You and I had sex. That doesn’t mean I’m yours. Not when you were fucking her the whole time.” His eyes dropped to your hands and he just nodded before clicking his tongue.

“You’re right. I’m too drunk for this… congratulations on the new apartment, amorcita.” His tall frame walked to the door and before you could stop him, the door was shut and he was gone.

Days later, and you were still a mopy mess. Everyone noticed your lack of friendly-nature, it was like the sun was gone. A knock on your door made you stir and sit upright. You opened it and saw your father, smiling face and holding a bag of groceries. Your dad stepped in, put everything away, then sat on the couch. You’d been crying before he got there and he saw that, wiping a tear from your cheek.

“You gonna tell me what’s going on?” He asked quietly, like he was trying to soothe a beast. You cried more, surprised that the well still was not dry, and he held your hand. “It was Miguel, wasn’t it?”

Your whole being shuddered and your eyes snapped up to his.

“Yeah, I see how you look at him, how you smile… I might be an old man, but I know my little girl.” He pet your head. “Listen. I’m not going to say I’m happy about this, because I think he’s far too old for you… but you’re a woman, and I know I raised a smart girl. Just always think about if he’s worth possibly losing your friendship with Gabi.” He pecked your forehead as you sniffled, thinking about his words. As he stood up, you grabbed his hand.

“Dad?” Your voice cracks and he looks down to your sad form. “I love you. Thank you.”

You fell back asleep soon after. Sleep was your only safety blanket, your only holy ground. It was the coping mechanism you shouldn’t have, but desperately needed. Sometimes, you’d end up sleeping at your father’s house from not wanting to be so alone.

Time went by so slowly and finally, a phone call woke you out of your deep sleep, answering without noticing the name. “Hello?”

“Can I come over to talk?” Miguel’s voice was full of gentle fear, like he was afraid to scare you away.

“Where are you telling Gabi that you’re going?”

“She’s with her boyfriend. Mi cielo, Please.”

“Fine. I’m at my dad’s tonight. He'll be home in an hour, and I don’t want him here while we talk about this.” You rolled out of bed and moved to the bathroom.

“I’m on my way.” You hung up after he said that and placed your phone face down on the bathroom sink. Staring at your reflection made you realize something…

You looked awful. You got yourself ready as usual, finally washing your face fully and doing some skin care, brushing and flossing your teeth, brushing your hair and pulling it into a ponytail, and finally putting on a summer sun dress.

You looked like yourself again. And it felt good.

The knock at the door was like a calling card for death, it felt like the end and a sinking feeling grew heavy in your stomach. Thank god for waterproof mascara.

Opening the door, you saw him standing there with a single rose in his hands. You stared at the flower before meeting his eyes.

“Why… did you bring that?”

“Because I saw it and it reminded me of you.” His words made your heart flutter, made your head almost dizzy with the happy hormones, but you needed to keep your cool.

“Um. Thank you.” You took the flower carefully and stepped aside so he could come in. “We… need to talk.”

“I know.” He nodded and sat down, spreading his legs a bit and unbeknownst to him, showing off his large size. He watched you sit across from him, crossing your ankles and playing with the flower in your hand as he cleared his voice. “I should apologize.”

“Yes, you should.”

He smiled, your biting and firey personality showing again. There was his girl.

“When your dad called and asked about the shirt, I was surprised. I didn’t think an old man like me could- would ever get that attraction from a young woman again…” he spoke, “you’re everything that a man could love. Everything a man could ever need, but… I’m too old for you, and I don’t want to hurt your friendship with my daughter.”

You nodded along. His eyes followed your movements, as if waiting for a response, but you didn’t give one.

“So?”

“So, if that’s all you had to say, you can leave now.”

“What?” He was shocked. He- he was trying to admit he wanted you but couldn’t have you, and you were just brushing him off?

“You heard me. You might have another date lined up after this, and I wouldn’t want you to keep her waiting.” The rage in your throat was coming out fast, and you might just start yelling at him if he didn’t leave soon. “Spare me the pity party for your age, Miguel. You know that you’re gorgeous, you can get anyone you want. So cut the shit. Who is she?” You barked and he leaned back, surprised.

“What are you talking about?”

“That woman! She made you so hot and bothered on that stupid date that you fucked the first girl you saw afterwards. Is that the woman you’d been seeing? What’s her name?” You bubbled, louder now. His eyes saw something he never thought he would in yours. Jealousy.

“She- she’s a coworker, it was just dinner-“ he mumbled and you laughed. You laughed!

“Just dinner? Do you think I’m stupid? That’s the one you’d been seeing for months, right?”

“Mi corazón, I don’t know what you think happened, but it didn’t-“ and something hit him. He didn’t owe you an explanation about her. But you wanted one.

You shared his feelings.

This was a revelation. You weren't upset because you regretted everything, or were worried about Gabi.

You were upset because you liked him.

Miguel smiled wide and that just stoked the fire inside of you.

“You think this is funny?”

“Hysterical, actually.” He moved forward and grabbed your wrist, yanking you to sit on his lap. “Because she could never be you, amor.” He tilted your chin with his index finger to look up at him. “I’d choose you a thousand times over.”

You were speechless. “You… would?”

“Well, that depends on your relationship with this boy, because if you were single, I’d chose you. I’d ask you on a date.” His words made your face burn with a heavy blush. “So?”

“So that boy… never existed.” You admitted shyly, avoiding his eyes contact as he laughed harder. “Shut up!”

“Go on a date with me.” He repeated and you nodded, then swallowed thickly.

“But… we need to tell Gabi.” You announced and his body stiffened, that familiar fear he felt before creeping in. “She deserves to know what’s going on.” You watched his eyes. “We already crossed a line we can’t erase, she should be aware that we might start seeing each other.” His hand found yours and he sighed, nodding.

The front door opened and your father stepped inside, barely glancing at the two of you as you both froze. As he took his shoes off, he smirked at you two.

“So the talk went well, I see, which means I’m making some rules. Rule number one, no sex in the house.”

“Dad!” You shouted, standing up fast and stepping forward.

“And protection is a must. My little girl isn’t getting pregnant before she can make her dreams come true-“

“Oh my god, stop talking!” You begged and he folded his arms, Miguel standing up behind you.

“He’s right. He’s just doing what any good father would do, mi amor.”

You visibly saw your father cringe. “Rule number two, no lovey-dovey talk in front of me please. That includes pet names.” He smiled, "I'll let you two have a few more minutes, but then I’m watching the game.” He walked to the kitchen, to which you moved to look at Miguel again.

“So. I’ll see you…”

“Tomorrow. We can tell Gabriella tomorrow.” His voice was firm, a man on a mission. Your man on a mission.

You were dressed in her favorite color. Why? Well, since you were about to tell her, essentially, thatyou wanted to fuck her dad, you figured you’d try to score all the points you could get. You’d keep the fact that you did already a secret for now.

As you got to Miguel’s house, your heart pounded in your chest. He wanted you to meet there so her boyfriend didn’t have to be subjected to the innate awkwardness of the situation.

You tugged at your skirt as you stood, finally knocking on the door. It swung open mere seconds after and you came face to face with Miguel. Your heart skipped as he looked at you and smiled.

“You look… wow.” His eyes were so sweet and puppy like, you couldn’t help but laugh. This gargantuan man was so soft for you, and you thrived for every second.

Holding your hand, he spun you to see the back of your outfit too, then pulled your hands to rest on his shoulders and bent down to press a slow kiss to your lips.

Grabbing the backs of your thighs, he lifted you to wrap around his waist and your hands slid into his thick brown hair as you kissed him back. Your back hit the couch and you gasped as his lips connected with your throat.

“Miguel- she’ll be here any minute!” You spoke, trying not to moan as he smirked against your skin, pulling down one strap.

“I’ll make it quick, I promise.” He whispered and moved his hands under your dress skirt, sliding your panties to the side. “Can’t help it, mi cielo, you get me so hard just looking at you in these damn dresses.” His words had you breathless, combined with his fingers prodding your entrance. The unzip of his pants made you practically dizzy, feeling his swollen tip dipping into you a bit. You took in a sharp breath as he groaned, “so wet already,” and pushed into you. The stretch was intense and your body curled into him instinctively from the burn. “Just a few more seconds, I promise.” His forehead leaned against your and you nodded, your hands pulling at his hair and making him want more of you. His mouth began to suck a bruise into the cleavage of your breasts and your head fell backwards as he sunk into you more, finally bottoming out completely. It was surreal, being filled with him, surrounded by his large body, and having all of your senses drowned in him. Your eyes almost crossed from the feeling it brought you and if you’d been more aware, you’d have heard the door open. But you didn’t, and so when he began rocking into you and lifted both your legs over one shoulder, your mouth fell open in blind pleasure. Your name fell from his lips and your nipples were rock hard from the sensation of him brushing his pelvis against your clit.

“Dad?” A feminine voice struck your ears and your eyes snapped open, upside down and staring at Gabriella looking away. Looking up, you realized Miguel was still moving. He didn’t hear her.

“M-Miguel, stop!” You called out and he immediately halted his movements, looking over your face. You pulled your straps onto your shoulders and stared at Gabi’s face, eyes wide with complete shock. Miguel’s eyes followed yours and he finally realized what was happening.

“Mierda…”

An awkward 20 minutes later of Gabriella refusing to come out of her room, she finally let you in and you sat on the bed with her, face still red as a beet and knee bouncing anxiously.

“So. You and my dad.” She said and you looked up with fear and regret.

“Gabi, I’m sorry, it just happened-”

“I figured it might.” She trailed off and your mouth hung open. “You always sucked at hiding your feelings, and he was always way too protective of you.” She stared at her shoes, “I just didn’t think it’d actually happen, ya know? Like I knew it could, but I didn’t think it actually would.” Your eyes filled with tears, scared to lose your best friend.

“Gabi… I’ll stop if you’re uncomfortable, we’ll stop-”

“And make you both miserable? No thanks. If there’s anyone I’d want my dad to be with, it’s you.” She sat next to you finally and put a hand on your shoulder. “And same with you. He’s had a little crush on you since your sophomore year of college, always just kinda staring, ya know? I tried to ignore it, but when we went to dinner and you two were dancing… it was just kind of obvious. And I want him to be happy.” Gabriella held your hand and you immediately started crying.

“Gabi-“

“But I’ll hurt you if you hurt him. And same goes for him. If you two do this, neither of you can fuck it up. I mean it!” She gave you a serious look and you nodded, smiling and wiping your eyes.

“I love you so much, Gabi.” You whispered and hugged her tight. She sighed and hugged you back. “Just… please don’t ever make me see that ever again.”

“I’m so sorry, I won’t!” You pulled away and looked at her face.

“And I’m not calling you mom either, so don’t ask.”

“God no don’t do that. I would hate that.”

“Ok.” She looked away. “So… is this why you were avoiding me?”

“Yeah… I couldn’t really face him.”

“Well, try not to think about that anymore, since this is happening now.” She heard a knock at the door and Miguel’s embarrassed form stood in the doorway, guilt on his features.

“You!” Gabriella stood up and threw a pillow at him, to which he caught reflexively.

“I’m sorry! I thought you were going to come back later.” His hands went up defensively and she glared at him, making you laugh.

“I don’t ever want to see that ever again. I don’t want to hear it, I don’t even want to think about it.” She shivered with disgust and you started laughing. Everything felt right.

That was until Miguel's work event, which was a few weeks later. He’d invited you as his date, and you excitedly agreed. Picking out your dress with Gabriella, you pulled out a long gown with a high slit to the leg.

“At least with that one, he won’t rip it.”

“Gabi!” You flicked her arm and she shrugged.

“Isn’t Danielle gonna be there?”

“Who?”

“Danielle, that woman he was seeing before you two started dating?” Gabriella glanced up at you from her phone as you stopped everything you had been doing.

“Oh.” Is all you could fathom. That’s right, she was a coworker. Your hands trembled a bit and Gabriella rested a hand on your shoulder.

“He never talked about her, and all he ever talks about anymore is you. So don’t worry.” You nodded and stared down at the blue dress. You bought that dress.

It’d been a few weeks of you and Miguel being together, practically inseparable. He had you sleeping at his house every other night, refusing to let you leave because ‘driving home would be too dangerous at that time of night.’

You knew he just wanted to hold you all night, to continue the constant overstimulation he loved to push you through. Whispers of ‘you can do it,’ ‘one more for me,’ ‘such a good girl, mi cielo.’ You’d twitch, tears streaming down your cheeks from the burn of your muscles, legs around his shoulders as his face buried into your cunt. His face was wet from how many times you’d already been pushed too far over the edge, finally kissing up your body as he smirked, pushing into you. No matter how many times you’d orgasmed, it would always be a stretch to fit him, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as he chuckled. He loved watching you come undone all over his cock all night long, leaving bite marks on your chest and shoulders, feeling your nails leave angry, red marks across his back. God forbid anyone ever saw you two naked the next morning, they’d think you both got into a war with stray cats. Your favorite was when he was about to come inside of you, and he’d pull your wrist to his lips, kissing you there while he unloaded in you, then dropping his forehead to yours and smiling.

The night of the event, you were pushing your breasts together in the dress. Tugging the fabric to fit perfectly, you stared at yourself in the mirror. The navy blue velvet was snug against your curves, the neckline plunging down the center and the slit high on your thigh. It was long sleeved, balancing how much skin was showing perfectly, and you paired it with silver strappy heels. Bouncy curls falling down your shoulders and elegant, simple makeup, you were the picture of grace and beauty.

Yet, the knot in your stomach made you want to lie and say you couldn’t go, that you were sick, that something came up, that you couldn’t go- anything to stay home and not have to see her.

But it was too late, and a knock at your door made you hyper aware of the time. Grabbing a clutch you’d picked to match the dress, you hurried and opened the door.

“Mi cielo-” His eyes dragged over your form and then back up at you. “Preciosa, por dios.” His voice dropped an octave and you smiled, feeling him pull your hand into his chest and kissing your wrist once more, your favorite feeling. You blushed as he spun you around with him, kissing right below your ear and moving lower and lower…

“I’d ravish you right here and now if we weren’t going to be late.”

“I think I’d rather have you take this off of me.” You answered and he pulled away a little, checking your expression.

“Por que?”

“I just- I’m nervous.” You avoided his eyes.

“I’ll be by your side the whole time, I promise.” He spoke softly and you nodded, biting the inside of your cheek. That wasn’t the problem.

Arriving, you couldn’t help but stare at the beautiful decor and elegant architecture of the chosen establishment. It felt like something from a movie, and you felt eyes on you. Turning, you saw Miguel staring at you with a wide grin on his lips, just watching you as you gawked at the interior. His hand slipped into yours and you smiled up at him.

“Let’s find our seats, amorcita.” He whispered and kissed your temple, escorting you to the table in the front of the room. You both went to get drinks and he began to mingle, introducing you to many people you couldn’t remember the names of.

A pair of heels clacking from behind you made you turn a bit and there she was.

That woman.

You made eye contact with her and she refused to look away, practically glaring into your soul.

“Y-You must be Danielle.” You reached out to shake her hand, and she obliged, looking you up and down in judgment. Everything about this introduction made you want to crawl under a rock. She hated you and you would too if someone stole Miguel from you. You originally did, actually.

“Yes, and you’re the little brat who stormed out of his house, right? The one his daughter’s age?” She answered and your stomach dropped. Shit. She tilted her head and gave you a condescending smirk. “Not much to look at, are you? But I guess sometimes a man wants someone who can make him feel young and alive again. That’s a phase, and he’ll get over it-”

Miguel’s arm wrapped around your waist as he walked up to you two and he stared down at Danielle, making her suddenly stop talking and start playing nice in front of him. Your body was shaking a bit, thinking about what she’d said.

“Miguel, nice to see you.” She smiled up at him, bright red lips showing off her white teeth, and you immediately felt inferior. This was a grown woman, an adult who’d worked her way to her position, with degrees in science and more. She was on par with Miguel, and you were just a wannabe dancer.

“I wish I could say the same, Danielle.” His somewhat rude answer made you gawk up at him.

“M-Miguel-” You stuttered, and he continued.

“This is my girlfriend, and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t make her uncomfortable just because you and I have a brief history.” This was too much for you. He was protecting your honor, standing up for you, but you felt pain in your chest from the anxiety. You thought you might pass out then and there. Pulling your hand from his, you rushed to find a quiet place alone. Moving to a hallway separate from everything else, you pushed open a door and sat at a chair and table. The lights were out and you heaved in a long, much-needed breath. A presence could be felt behind you near the door and you slumped your shoulders.

“I just needed a minute, I’m sorry if I embarrassed you.” You apologized and his hands on your shoulders made you feel even worse.

“Amorcita, you have nothing to apologize for. She shouldn’t have been so rude.” He whispered, pulling your hand to stand up. “Let me show you that she was wrong.”

His lips trail down your shoulder and he begins to unzip your dress. Your breath stutters and you glance to the door.

“Did you lock the door?” You ask, panting already from how hot his kisses get you.

“It doesn’t lock, so we have to be quiet.” The dress begins to fall from your arms and you gasp as the cold air against your chest, feeling his hands hold your sides and push the fabric to fall to the floor. He trails one of his hands to touch your clit and he smirks. “No panties? Sucia…” Your head falls backwards onto his shoulder as you grab his arm and he kisses into your hair. “Come on, preciosa, just focus on me.” His words send a shiver down your spine, fingers rubbing in circles as you see stars. Sliding down further, his finger enters you and he growls. “Dripping already, perfect for me.”

You moan and his other hand wraps around your mouth. “Quiet, besita.” You nod and writhe against his hand as he continues plunging his finger inside of you. The curl opf his digit makes you see white behind your eyelids and you feel everything inside of you explode, unexpected and fast. He takes his finger out of you and licks it, unzipping his pants and pulling himself out. He tugs his slacks down a bit and bends you over the dining table, hand sliding up your back and tangling into the hair at the base of your neck. Sliding into you, he puts his other hand onto the front of your belly and thrusts hard. The bulge moves into his hand and his head drops a bit, feeling himself through your stomach making him even more wild for you. Your body was perfect for him, the best thing that had happened to him in a long time, and he couldn’t be more grateful. He wanted to show you that gratitude and so he’d pleasure your body until you understood what you meant to him.

Your gasps and quiet begs made him continue to slowly thrust and rut into your heat. It was sensual and rough, without being too fast, and this made you practically melt in his hands. Your coil was tightening within the seconds and the pull you felt against your scalp as he pulled your back into his chest, now fucking up into you from behind harder. The new angle made you snap, making your mouth drop open and heave in a loud, muffled shriek. You couldn’t help it, he was always so good at maneuvering your body. Your entire being trembled and he pulled out of you, which made you push him backward. He stumbled into the wall behind him and you got on your knees, tongue out and immediately sucking around him. His hot length in your lips was absolutely heavenly, and seeing as you two hadn’t done this before, he was watching you with wild, eager eyes. The view of you on your knees between your legs, his cock in your mouth, and you slurping him like a woman possessed made him practically insane. Miguel couldn’t take much more, and when he felt the tip of his dick hit that back of your throat, that was his last straw. He came hard down your throat and you gagged on the thick spurts, but not once did you cough or spit. You drank it up, licking your lips and never breaking eye contact once.

He was frozen, shocked. His precious girl, his angel… his innocent woman was everything he dreamed of and more. He’d been holding back and staying on the more gentle side, but now? Oh, now you’d opened a door that he didn’t ever want to close.

Standing up once more, completely naked, you bat your eyes to him and he pulled you against him, kissing you feverishly. After a moment more of hard, rough kisses, you panted and pulled away.

“We have to go back out there.” You whispered and he huffed.

“What if I don’t want to?”

“You’re giving a speech, Miguel, you have to go back out there.” You insisted. His hands gripped you with no intent of letting go, but you were able to pry him off of you. Picking up your dress, you wiggle it back on and properly placed, but the marks on your body and the makeup on his face was hard to miss. He tucked himself back into his pants and groaned, trying to pull himself together. You both worked to make yourselves presentable in silence and finally turned back to each other.

He watched you smile a bit and reach for his hand, and he knew she was wrong. This wasn’t a phase. He loved you. He would keep you forever and there was no possible way he’d ever think of anyone else ever again.

Going back out to the party, you both stood by the bar and you excused yourself, walking to the ladies room while he waited for your drinks. You stood in the mirror and stared at your reflection. Your hair was a mess now, and your lipstick was smudged, as well as a few black mascara marks from tearing up while gagging on his cock. You couldn’t help but smile at this, until you saw Danielle behind you. Turning to her, a fear struck you but immediately dissipated as you smirked.

“What’s that look for?” She questioned and you couldn’t help but laugh,

“Just thinking about how unsatisfied he must have been if you couldn’t keep him.” You stared directly into her eyes. “I was planning on being the bigger person, but after having sex with him just now, I think I’ll say fuck that and give you my honest opinion. You’re a miserable, boring bitch. Have a great dinner and I hope you find someone as vanilla and mundane as you.” Your words were like knives being thrown and each one landed with precision and grace. You weren’t one to back down and you wouldn’t start now. Walking out of the bathroom, you turned back to say one last thing.

“And you should know, Miguel never even mentioned you.” You winked as her mouth dropped, leaving without another word. Finding your wonderful boyfriend again, he handed you the drink you had ordered and you bit your lip.

“What’s that look for?”

“I may have said a few things to Danielle just now.”

Miguel blinked with surprise and just laughed. “That’s my fiesty girl.” He said and sipped his drink, slipping his hand around your waist again.

The night went by beautifully after that, talking and laughing with his friends and hearing his speech. You two had left with smiles on both of your faces, and that night, Miguel proved over and over how much he cared for you.

And he continued to prove it every day for the rest of your lives.

Epilogue

Tags: @pllao @itzsab @smo66y @misswonderfrojustice @cyberbugg @jollybananaqueen @eeryyy @nightma @topreice @poppyflower-22 @yoonlith @miragemurder @ihateuguys @knoxx-seresinbradshaw @minaxcarter @autismsupermusicalassassin @migueloharaslxt @mintqueenjo @chshiresins @um-well @kxszy @miguelswifey04 @mushy-mushroom04 @tymns @oxrchd @mimiamma2002 @allysunny

[vixstarria]

Are you mine?

So I was initially going to do maybe 500 words worth of them being cute and cuddly, but then this happened. I have no control at this point, I am just the messenger. 

Astarion x F!Reader, Astarion x Tav, Astarion x Bard Tav, soft Astarion, Astarion POV 

Mostly fluff and comfort with a bit of hurt (Astarion’s past recollections), basically just pillow talk, cuddling, banter, non-explicit, no spoilers 

Very late Act 1 / early Act 2 (pre-confession). I’ve already written past this point earlier, but I think it’s such a fun time to return to for anything flirty, with Astarion being in love but being pissed off and / or in denial about it.  

Approximately 2,000 words 

AO3

Being able to get by with little sleep was both a blessing and a curse. In no time at all you were ready to take on whatever the day would throw at you. You were rested, alert, ready for battle. The downside? The amount of time you had to spend alone with your thoughts.   

You weren’t fully alone, not exactly. You laid on your side with your nose buried in her neck, one of your arms underneath the pillow, the other wrapped around her, your leg following the bend of hers like you were chasing her warmth, bare skin on bare skin, your bodies filling each other’s nooks so perfectly.  

You could have been up and doing something useful, you supposed, but you didn’t want to waste a precious second of being able to just hold her. 

You winced and sighed, having caught yourself on that thought.  

Pathetic idiot... 

The truth was, you knew you were living on borrowed time.  

Oh you toyed with the idea of amassing more tadpoles for more powers and seeing how long and how far you could take this, but in your heart of hearts you knew this was a lunatic idea. The absolute best-case scenario was that one way or another, the tadpole would be removed from your brain, removing all its benefits alongside it. 

Then, you would spend the rest of your eternal life in the shadows, forever looking over your shoulder in fear of being dragged back to Cazador.  

You would never see the sun again.  

You would probably never see her again.  

Suddenly feeling choked up, despite not really even needing to breathe, you pressed your lips against the small of her neck, pausing then landing a few more small, soft kisses along her shoulder. 

She stirred and rolled over onto her stomach, looking at you with a knowing smile through her mess of hair. 

Shit. 

“Oh... I thought you were asleep,” you said. 

“I know...” she replied, stretching lazily. “You only kiss me like that when you think I’m sleeping.” 

So many implications in that statement. Your mind immediately churned out a dozen ways to respond, deflecting, denying, joking or otherwise brushing it off. But you wanted to see where leaning into it might take you.  

“Do I..? Here, I’ll fix that.” 

You leaned toward her, placing a soft kiss on her lips. Just your lips brushing against hers, petal-soft. She closed her eyes and hummed in pleasure as you trailed your lips further along her skin, leaving featherlight kisses from the corner of her mouth further up the side of her face.  

You were careful to keep the kisses tender rather than sensual. Not something you were accustomed to, at all. She smiled and squirmed a little as your lips dipped below her jawline near her earlobe. 

“That tickles...” she murmured, making you chuckle.  

“My sweet girl,” you whispered, nuzzling her ear. 

Ugh, where in the hells did that come from..? you thought, startled. 

She noticed. Of course she noticed. 

She shifted onto her side, propping herself up with an elbow and resting her head on her hand.  

“Am I? Yours?” There it was again, that knowing, quizzical look.  

“Are you not?” you asked.  

“Hmm... How can I tell?” 

“Isn’t it obvious?” you flashed her a roguish grin, which she ignored. 

“Should it be? Is there something you’ve done to claim me as yours?” 

Her words might have stung, had her tone not been so playful rather than mocking. She was encouraging, not denying you.  

I don’t suppose she’s going to count all the unspeakable things we’ve done to each other. I guess I wouldn’t either. 

“Is that what you want me to do?” you asked, slowly tracing a finger down her arm.  

“That depends... Do you want me to be yours?” 

This conversation was idiotic. Why was it making you increasingly giddy? 

“Come now, we have been doing this for how long? Are we really going to be coy about whether or not we like each other?” you asked, trying to sound assured rather than flustered.  

She leaned forward, as if to reveal a secret for your ears only. 

“That’s not quite what we’re being coy about, now is it?” she whispered, before placing a lingering kiss on your lips.  

You were completely out of your depth in this kind of flirting, if one could call it that. Concentrating on the physical and sexual, dropping innuendos, hinting at promises you had no intention of keeping, teasing, arousing, adding in just the right amount of vulgarity to otherwise honeyed words to make them blush and stammer in trepidation... That you could do all day as an afterthought, all while mulling over something you had read earlier, or otherwise being a thousand leagues away with your thoughts.  

But this... It was like she was playing with and delicately caressing your innermost, rawest feelings, all whilst inviting you to do the same with hers. Sex was barely even a consideration. This was an entirely different dance. And it was exhilarating. 

Before you could think of what to say, she moved on. 

“You know, Lae’zel propositioned me earlier,” she said, briefly burying her face in her hands and shaking her head with a quiet, incredulous laugh.  

“She did what? ...And how did that go?” 

“It was very... Lae’zel. I wasn’t sure whether she was offering to kill me or fuck me at first. I had to politely decline.” 

“And you didn’t tell me?” you frowned. 

“Should I have?” She studied you with a curious look, resting her chin on her hands. “How would it make you feel? If I accepted her offer?”  

Like the whole world was pulled out from beneath my feet. Again. 

“You and Lae’zel? Hmm. Sounds like something I’d pay to watch.” 

“That’s not what I asked.” Her eyes seemed to be piercing straight into your soul. You had to quickly do a double-take on whether your tadpole might have been betraying anything to hers, before rebuking yourself. She wouldn’t pry like that.  

Your eyes roamed around the tent as you tried to assemble some words that weren’t too far from or too close to the truth. 

“Lae’zel is... exotic. Far be it for me to stand between anyone and such an... ‘outlandish’ experience. But I would prefer to have you all to myself, if it’s all the same to you. I don’t devote all that time to making sure that pretty head of yours stays on your shoulders just to have Lae’zel decapitate you in her throes of passion.” 

“That’s still not what I asked, but I’ll let it slide,” she rolled her eyes. “Getting a straight answer from you is like trying to seduce a blushing maiden.” 

“A riveting challenge?” 

“A tiresome one. That’s most likely not worth the effort.” 

How many blushing maidens have you seduced?   

“Alright, fine, I admit I might be a bit jealous. ...On top of being concerned for your wellbeing, darling.” 

“Just a bit jealous?” she teased. 

“Matters of honour would demand that I challenge her to a duel,” you sighed. 

“You have no honour. And she would crush you.” 

“I know. But I would die a hero’s death. Songs about me would live through the ages. ...You might need to write them for me.” 

“Sure, right after I wrote songs about how I conquered a githyanki,” she snorted. “Or perhaps songs about being conquered by one myself? I could spin it either way. Which do you think would stir more loins?” 

“I don’t know and my own loins are taking no part of this. Now are you going to keep talking nonsense, or will you go back to sleep already?” 

“Why, so you can sneak more tender little kisses on me?” she laughed. 

You didn't really want her to fall back asleep. Talking with her kept your darker thoughts at bay. What you did want, was to feel her wrapped around you again. 

“You know what? If you’re not going to sleep, you may as well carry on with your business, and I’ll meditate sitting up for a change.”  

You snatched the blanket from her, making her exclaim a sharp “Hey!” as the cold mountain air touched her bare skin, and wrapped it around yourself, settling in a cross-legged position. Moments later, she was on your lap, facing you with her legs wrapped around your hips. Just as you anticipated. You smirked and accepted her in your blanket cocoon, wrapping an arm around her waist and holding her close as you kissed her. 

“So, my blushing maiden,” she said as she leaned away from you, slightly, stretching her arms around your neck and resting her forearms on your shoulders. “It seems I have you backed up against a wall. I won’t force you – do what you will with your virtue. But you must decide. Will you give in willingly? Or deny me, and spend the rest of your life wondering: what if?” She leaned in to whisper the last two words dramatically. “I will ask you again: do you want me to be yours?” 

You wondered if she had any idea how apt that comparison really was to how you felt. 

Or how eerily similar it was to some of the tactics you yourself employed when luring in your victims. Hells, even the words were almost identical to some of the ones you’ve used. To make them surrender with reckless abandon, throwing all caution to the wind, blinded by your promises. Cattle rushing happily to the slaughter. 

You knew all this. You’d seen it countless times. But just then, you also saw there was no malice in her eyes. Only something like hope that she was trying to mask with mischief.  

Wherever she was leading you, you wanted to follow.  

“Fine,” you said softly, looking into her eyes. “I do want you to be mine. And no, I don’t want to share you with anyone.” You felt oddly elated as the words left your mouth. “I’d feel compelled to dismember any hand that touched you, so to give me a fair chance at survival, could you stay away from Lae’zel? Please?” 

She grinned and grasped your face in her hands, pressing her lips against yours. 

“Good girl,” she purred, still grinning, earning herself a sharp pinch on her bottom, making her jolt before she continued. “This leads me to my next question: do you want to be mine?” 

There it was. The trap beyond the lure. You saw it clear as day. And still, you wanted to follow her. 

“Darling, after the past 200 years, I’m really not disposed to letting anyone else claim ownership of me”. You watched her smile falter, and you hurriedly continued before it turned to sadness or disappointment, or worse, pity, and spread to her eyes. “But I just might make an exception for you… If the offer is mutual.” You took one of her hands in yours. “So, are you? Mine?” you asked, placing a kiss on her knuckles.  

Who’s backed against a wall now? 

"Of course I am. As if you even needed to ask.” She touched her forehead against yours before placing another kiss on your lips. Did she have to sound so triumphant saying that? “I am yours and no one else’s. Now you say it.”  

Ah, still me. 

Still, you fought hard not to laugh as a feeling of relief spread warmly throughout your body. You hadn’t even noticed how tense you were. 

“Alright, alright...” You cleared your throat and held a dramatic pause before continuing. “You are mine and no one else’s.” 

She let out an exasperated growl and grabbed and twisted one of your nipples. You chortled even as you yelped, grabbing the offending hand and holding it behind her back. She immediately made another attempt with her other hand, which you also successfully intercepted, now holding both her arms behind her. Refusing to give up, she went for your shoulder with her teeth, with a maniacal giggle, as you laughed and tried to fend her off with your chin.  

“Yes, I’m yours, I’m yours, you feral wildcat! I’m yours... Only yours.” you declared hastily into her hair somewhere near her ear, as she calmed down. “I mean it. Now behave! I always ask before I bite, don’t I?” you said, releasing her arms. 

She attempted to glare at you, her eyes narrowed, but couldn’t keep her face straight and broke into a grin again.  

“Well... Look at us...” she drawled, placing her arms back onto your shoulders. “Snatched up onto the nautiloid with nothing but the clothes on our backs, and now we’ve each got a whole other person.” 

She looked so pleased and happy... Why..? This couldn’t last. No matter how much you wanted it to. …Could it..?  

You were falling, deeper and deeper. 

My love... My sweet, sweet love... Where are you taking me? 

~~~~~ 

Next in series - Gentle warding bond

Want more of these two? There’s more. Series master list. 

AO3

[sturniolo04]

The Confession 1 C.S.

Fwb!Mean!Chris x Fwb!Fem!Reader

A/N: I tried something different :)

*Really long you have been warned.

I dont even know how I ended up in this position. One minute my best friend Madi thinks she likes both Matt and Chris and the next she is 100% Matt. Me and Madi are super close I mean we practically grew up together and when we met the triplets in Boston everything changed, our circle grew just a little bit bigger. Lately, I haven't been the best friend to Madi just because I have been neglecting to confess to her about my secret crush on Chris and I am not the type to run over her if she knows she likes Chris because who am I to tell her she can't like him especially since I haven't told her that I did.

its about 1:50 in the morning and by this time Madi had walked all the way to a park and found a bench to sit and bawl her eyes out she couldnt figure out why she was feeling this bad whether it was that she couldnt articulate how she hurt Matt and Chris or if it is was because she cant choose between chris and matt she knows them both equally for a long time. sighing looking down at her phone finally deciding to call the one person she knew is always there. Holding in my tears as the dial tone rings hoping she wasnt asleep yet.

"Hello Madi"

jess speaks into the phone

"Jess"

she states through choked tears

"Madi what's going on love what happened" 

"i messed up really bad and i dont know what to do"

she exclaims letting her tears fall

"Madi"

"I like chris and matt and ive might have messed up our friendship"

"no madi you didnt okay i promise you didnt they are still your friends and they love you"

you quickly reply feeling that heavy feeling in your chest again as she still thinks she like chris.

"i dont know"

she replies through a fit of tears

"its okay promise try to get some sleep and you will feel so much better tomorrow i promise"

you reply reassuring her.

"okay goodnight"

she sniffles out

"goodnight i will see you when you get back home "

she hung up from jess and sighed out once more calming her nerves proceeding to walk back to the house. as she made her way into the driveway sitting back on the concrete driveway where the night officially started 

"MADI"

you exclaim softly seeing her sitting on the driveway

"hi"

she replies quietly as she turns around to look at you

"i was so worried are you okay"

you ask again.

"im sorry"

you sigh squatting down and hugging her then sitting down next to her

"i fucked things up didnt i"

she huffs out

"what no well i mean chris and matt are not speaking to each other currently but i mean whats new"

you sigh out since madi basically confessed to both of them on the same night and them both finding out in this driveway tonight.

" but it was my fault im the reason they are mad at each other"

"no no youre not okay they are just being them okay they will grow up"

you reassure her

"but i mean i told you had feelings for chris too"

you state smirking trying to shake the heavy feeling in her stomach at that sentence.

"jesss"

"you know i love you"

you say side hugging her

'well im going to bed you think youre going to be okay"

"yeah thanks j" 

"okay"

you say standing up and walking back into the house as madi rests her head on her arms positioned on top of her knees as someone comes and sits next to her quietly

"hi matt"

she speaks softly out noticing his presence

"hey"

"im sorry"

"why you were just being honest" 

he sighs out

"i do really like you" 

she confesses again

"no madi you and chris are perfect and honestly it makes he was at least able to communicate how he feels about you without being oblivious about it im not the one you need madi you are way out of my league and im okay with that honestly"

he sighs out rambling

"what the actual fuck matt stop youre  out of my league why do you just automatically assume your not good enough" 

she exclaims frustrated standing up and wrapping the blanket you had brought her getting upset

"madi no youre not out of league okay just stay"

he says pulling her hand down a little as she sighs and sits back down as matt pulls me into him connecting our lips guiding her on his lap in the process. He tangled his fingers through her messy hair as he continue to make out with her. Her hands wrapped around his neck tightly as he stood up carrying her back into the house. shepulled away quickly he closed the door behind them and set her back on her feet.

"Matt if-if"

she trails of whispering

"wait"

he stops her as he pulls his and her shoes off leaving them downstairs as he swiftly picks her up again by her thighs taking her upstairs to her room quietly being sure not wake up anyone especially Chris. Matt leans back in after setting her on her bad standing in between her legs attempting to connect their lips again but madi halted him in the process.

"matt..seriously come on"

she giggles out as he sighs out stares at her as she bites her lip slowly.

"yes madi you were saying"

he chuckles out

"matt if- if we do this"

she trails off motions towards them

"no one can know yet"

"okay"

he kind of chuckles at the concept

"im serious matt"

she exhales out looking at him as his face softens at her response

"at least until i figure out how to tell" 

"chris"

"yeah because"

"i know i know"

he sighs out moving himself from in between her to next to her laying on her bed. 

"jess' mom might be coming to boston"

"what that so cool"

"yeah she called her when i walked off tonight"

"oh" 

"yeah"

"well im going to go"

he states standing up

"where"

she states worried

"dont worry just in the other room with chris maybe so you can get some sleep"

he chuckles out giving madi a forehead kiss as he walks out of her room.

Madi wakes up the next morning mentally face palming herself considering well she basically made out with Matt after literally confessing to both brothers she has feelings for them. she rolled out of bed hoping everything will return to normal. she shower and put on this And head downstairs to be met with the face of the one and only

"good morning"

"whats up how are you feeling"

"better just like jess said"

"jess"

"i talked to her last night after everything"

"oh okay hey madi listen forget everything i said last night i was just being stupid it was nothing"

he states quickly realizing he also confessed that he liked you.

"chris i dont think it was nothing you dont have to lie about it"

"no im being for real"

"christopher"

"what im serious"

"okay then sound cool"

she states heading back upstairs

"where are you going"

"to wake up matt and everyone else"

Chris couldnt understand why he said that he literally let her get away again. His thoughts were soon interrupted the sound of jess's doorbell ringing. He went over and opened the door to reveal

"oh hi there i was- where is jess"

jess mom trails off

"she's upstairs um"

he trailed off kind of awkwardly since he had no idea that this jess's mom as what sounded like jess's laugh approaching the bottom of the stair case. I turned to see jess walking down with Nick and Madi being carried down the stairs by matt. the lady at the door cleared her throat as they all snapped out of their trance looking in that direction

"Mom"

she exclaims running over and hugging her

"mom"

Chris questions

"yeah.. mom this is chris, matt, nick and then you remember madi"

she trails off as chris waves his hand

"Hi you all"

she says with a raised eyebrow smiling

"jess; mom"

she exlcaims hugging her after jess

"hey madi"

"when did you get here" 

madi asks her

"last night when jess called"

Madi looks over at jess standing next to her as she shrugs her shoulders a little not wanting to talk about last night at all due to the fact she still felt the pit in her stomach of guilt of even allowing herself the like chris and not trust madi enough to even tell her that you liked him.

"so mom do you want to come on in then"

she states as madi and her both step aside to let her in

"how long are you going to be here for"

"just the weekend"

"maybe we can all go somewhere and just hang out for a little bit maybe grab dinner does that sound good guys"

she asks everyone

"im fine with that"

nick agrees nodding his head

"mom"

you question her

"sure plus i want to see all there is about Boston since this is my first time up here"

"well the triplets can definitely help point out those key spots since they've grown up here"

"literally"

chris chuckles out admiring jess' laugh slightly

"cool so do want me to ride with you"

"umm.. im going to ride with jess and her mom is that okay"

"uh yeah of course" 

madi and you grab your shoes and they all head out the door.

"soo"

she trails off looking the mirror at the two girls in the backseat of the car

"what's going on with you and Matt Madi"

"uhh"

" yeah i was going to ask about that i mean i knew you guys made up because i saw him come outside after i left you after you came back home"

"umm i dont know what you guys are talking about"

"are you sure because i remember clearly you being carried down the stairs by him this morning"

"in a skirt too at that madii"

you exclaim dragging out the 'i' in your best friend's name

"oh come on what is that suppose to mean just because we made up doesn't mean we are dating"

"so your telling me he hasnt tried to make a move on you after everything that happened yesterday evening"

she asks as madi kind of stares off into space getting flashbacks to last night of literally her and matt making out in her driveway

"oh my god he totally did didnt he"

"what no jess no" 

"madi"

jess's mom exclaims trying to get an answer out of her

"OKAY maybe we might have made out in the driveway at like 2 in the morning"

"MADISON"

you exclaim at your best friend with your jaw dropped

"what i mean its wasnt like terrible"

she shyly replies.

"that you made out with your bestfriend the best friend you liked for literally ever or that he was actually good at making out"

"OH MY GOODNESS"

madi exclaims embarrassed

" just asking"

"OH MY GOD NO"

"it was definitely the second option"

you giggle out

"shut up Jess"

she exclaims pushing some of her hair behind her ear opening her phone

"just make sure you do and know what your heart wants madi" 

"of course always"

Taglist

@dirtylittleheart333 @stayingstromboli @wh0resstuff @mintsturniolo @spicymuffins03 @emely9274

[aikrus]

"You're haunting me."

i don't think aizawa would let you go easily, and i'm probably not gonna do anything with this

"I love you," he breathes like that explains it all.

You step away and it's so natural these days that you don't even shake.

"I don't know what to do without you."

He's grabbing your wrist, tight but tender and you can feel the sparks traveling from the tips of your fingers straight through your ill stomach.

Looking at him, you can tell just how genuine the words are. He's a mess, glossy eyes and red, patchy skin. His lips are cracked and he seems breathless, he seems desperate.

You've seen him like this before.

"We can't keep doing this," you shake your head and plead he'll understand; but you know better. It's been nonstop in this give and take of yours, as foolproof as the water cycle.

"We can do this," he insists, but there's no point. His grey eyes spark with life and promise and hope, and despite the grimy streets he stood on Shouta was- without a doubt- beautiful in a radiant holy manner.

Last time, you think receiving that look along side the gentle stroke of his thumb across the inside of your wrist was enough.

"I can't."

You don't look at him- refuse to in fact and the tightening of his grip solidifies your resolve.

His breath hitches, it's a rare thing and hurts all the more. "But you love me. And you know I love you too."

He says it like it makes sense, like in this situation that's all that should matter. Still, too many nights were spent awake and in fear.

You knew too much, after the first time you kept seeing through more and more of this glamour he draped over you like a blessing.

He'll keep pushing. He'll never stop if you don't end it here and it's itching at your heart.

"It's not enough."

You wait a second and settle your stomach easily despite the acid rushing up your throat while hiding behind your closed eyes. "You're not enough."

He lets you go. It could be over, but seeing his foot step closer you figured it may take a little more- he's the type to need to draw conclusions by himself.

You rip your now free arm away from him and stumble back. He looks shocked and hurt, and people are starting to not so subtly group together and watch.

"You're a ghost, Shouta; my own personal monster to terrorize my every breathing moment. I wake up in the morning gasping for air and sleep each night so sure I won't open my eyes again."

You feel tears start to rush and let them flow without resistance. If he sees the way people look at him now he might let go a little easier.

"My phone rings and I'm shaking in fear, and I watch my words even though I know it wouldn't matter." He looks at you with a new layer of shock and maybe horror, though after a second it seems like nothing more like disappointment and regret.

You'd thrown the wire's he'd dispersed around the room that morning. He must've thought they'd be harder to see than the cameras, but your lover was known to underestimate you.

"I can't keep living like this." You look in his eyes clearly now, letting the grim expression filled with heartbreak etch itself uselessly in your memory.

He may not believe you yet, but you square your shoulders and speak directly: "I won't live like this."

It sounds like a threat and a small thrill travels up your spine when it becomes obvious he took it as one. Shouta looks positively devastated at the thought of you being harmed in any way, you supposed being upset was harm in a way.

You've had this feeling, and you swear on your soul that it's true, that if you didn't get out now you might never be able to.

"You're haunting me," you insist with one last tear, "and I think it's time to pass on."

You walk straight ahead- straight towards him- and brush past without looking his way. He lets you go, and that's more than you expected from him.

You took step after step with baited breath held in suspension each block. The farther you got the more you were sure; it was your time to be a ghost. You'd disappear, and you'd never have to think of the monster you found-and fell in love with-in Hosu ever again.

[lil-binuu]

˖⁺‧₊𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝

PART II ₊‧⁺˖

Resolving things with Elias

1290 words

part 1

buckle up for the ride!

“Hey.”

You turned around, a key in your hand as you closed up the cafe.

“Elias, hey.”

You hadn’t spoken to each other in a couple days. You understood that Elias needed to take a break after the argument. You both needed to.

You hadn’t reached out to him at all, you thought it would be better to let him take as much time as he needed without bothering him. Still, you hoped he knew how sorry you were.

“How was work?”

“Uh, Good… How were your lectures?”

You spoke slowly. Almost trying to process the conversation that was so different from your last. Almost trying to savour the conversation as it might be your last.

“Yeah, good. I- I wanted to talk to you. Wanna ride?” He gestured to the motorcycle behind him.

“Sure.”

There was something in you so relieved to see Elias. He seemed okay; that meant he hopefully was. If he’s willing to speak to you, does that mean he’s willing to move on?

The bike ride with Elias was the most comfort you had since the argument. But there was still a pit in your stomach as you wrapped your arms around his waist and rested your head against his back.

You wanted to hold him so tight but you knew that if you did, you might not be able to let go.

He stopped at a park. You had come here before to stargaze together. A moment so sweet that it made your tongue bitter at the thought of it never happening again.

Taking a seat at a bench, admiring the orange streaks across the sky.

“How have you been?” He asked earnestly.

“It’s.. “ You stopped yourself. You couldn’t lie to him. “It’s been.. tough.”

Elias nodded.

“Same here.”

He reached out a hand.

“Maybe it doesn’t have to be anymore.”

His palm grazed the top of your hand. Threading his fingers to intertwine with yours.

You met his eyes.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I have serious feelings for you and I made a mistake by holding them back. But I don’t want to let one mistake screw everything else up.”

His eyes didn’t break away from yours for a second.

Elias continued, “You hurt me. Seeing you flirt with someone else, that hurt. I mean, you told me that I was being possessive-”

“I didn’t mean it.” You cut in.

“I know. And I also know that you didn’t do it to hurt me. You did it to get my attention. The only thing I want to know is, why didn’t you just talk to me?”

Why?

Why didn’t you talk to him? Why did you go out of your way to get close to someone just to make the person you like jealous? Knowing that it could hurt him?

To be honest, you didn’t even know.

“You know you can talk to me right? It’s important to have conversations about us, about committing to each other and about a future together.”

Wait… are you kidding me?

Was Elias really going to sit there and tell you it was your fault for not initiating a conversation when he didn’t either? He was the one who let you believe he wasn’t even serious about you and yet it’s your fault for not addressing it properly?

“You were doing the same. You were also avoiding those conversations with me. You made me think that you were just messing around and wasting my time.”

“Wasting your time? You think that being with me is a waste of time?”

“Elias, I’m not ‘with’ you. I’m just here. It’s been.. how many months of sleeping together? And yet we haven’t even moved past the ‘talking stage’.”

Elias was silent for a moment, breathing heavily. This was clearly not how he wanted the conversation to go. But you had to talk about things. You were sick of just burying them and pretending they didn’t matter.

“I.. I wanted to ask you to be my partner. Make things official…. But this isn’t how I wanted our relationship to start…”

“I’m sorry, Elias, I really am, but I can’t just forget these feelings and pretend I didn’t feel them just because you decided to man up and ask me to date you.”

“Man up? Y/n, I’ve always wanted to date you, I just wanted to make sure that what I was doing was right and that you wanted it as well.”

“And by doing that..” Your voice grew softer as the emotion began to fill your throat and well up in your eyes. “You made me feel like I wasn’t good enough for you. Like- Like you were just waiting around to get rid of me because I wasn’t what you wanted in a partner or..or something..”

You looked away from Elias. Leaning back and looking out at the darkening sky.

Neither of you said anything, your confession hanging in the air and dampening the space between you.

His hand that once had retreated, came back to rest on yours.

“I’m sorry you felt that way.”

You looked back at him, tears burning your eyes.

“You mean ‘I’m sorry I made you feel that way’?”

Elias pulled his hand away from yours, becoming defensive.

“No, I didn’t make you feel that way, you felt that way by yourself-”

“Well I wouldn’t have felt that way if you made me feel like I was actually worth something in your life.”

“Oh like how you made me feel like I was controlling and toxic? That I was possessive, and jealous all while you were flirting with a stranger in my face!”

You both fell silent again.

“I don’t know what I was thinking..” You said softly.

“Yeah, and I don’t know what I was thinking by bringing you here.”

Elias got up, and walked around the bench towards his motorcycle.

“So you’re just gonna walk off like last time? Leaving things unresolved so that in a couple days you can show up and we can argue again?”

“Get on the bike. I’m taking you home.” Elias had lowered his voice. He was done arguing.

You got up, frustrated.

“And leave again? Where will you run off to? To sleep with your side-piece?”

Elias stopped, putting his helmet down, and stepping closer to you.

“I’m not the one who flirted with someone else.”

You didn’t say anything.

“Doesn’t mean I wasn’t worried about you.”

You said in a mutter, not even sure if you wanted Elias to hear you.

It didn’t matter anyway, you didn’t get a response.

The bike ride was different than before. Earlier, you had wrapped your arms around his waist and hoped you two could work things out for the better. Now, you wrapped your arms around his waist and felt nothing but empty.

When Elias pulled up outside your apartment building, you went straight in, not saying a word to Elias.

“What are you doing?”

You asked as you noticed him on the stairs behind you.

“I’m making sure you get in alright.” He replied.

“I didn’t know you still cared.”

“I never said I didn’t care.”

“But you made me feel that way.”

Elias sighed heavily, a pang of emotion hitting him. It was the little arguments that hurt the most.

And the truth is, he knew you were right. He had been so absorbed in everything else that he put his relationship with you on fucking standby.

“Fine then.”

He turned around, walking back out the building. You made it clear you didn’t want him there. That was all he needed to leave.

He pulled his helmet back on and revved the engine.

He almost didn’t hear your scream.

note: i promise i really tried to make it fluffy and romantic and make them work it out but it’s just not in me guys >.<

[neuroprincess]

Holding Her - Melissa Schemmenti/Female Reader

Melissa Schemmenti/Female Reader

Summary: Melissa doesn't usually scare easily, but her daughter, so small and fragile, is the scariest thing she has to face.

Classification: Slight angst, fluff

Warnings: Premature baby, insecurity

Word count: +1400

Unrevised

She's small, much more so compared to her brother who was born equally prematurely, she's fragile and much calmer. When Melissa looks at her, suddenly feels incredibly scared of this little human being. The hands, which she had never considered big or imposing before, seem extraordinary big to hold the baby weighing less than 5 pounds for the first time, right there in the labor room, just after her chaotic arrival into the world. Olivia Ann doesn't cry much, doesn't give much work and sleeps almost all the time, the little body seeming to struggle to breathe, something that makes her heart ache and a strange feeling in the pit of stomach with the sight, as well as the slightest possibility of losing her little girl. If she could, she would breathe and give the life for her, feel the pain and struggle in her place.  

"Mel..." Y/N calls her after realizing that she isn't listening, the two are in the same room while the younger finishes feeding the newborn "Do you want to hold her?" and offers after the nurse understands what she means, agreeing.  

Having been born prematurely and underweight, the girl was admitted to the ICU almost immediately. The next day mom was released, but she remained in the hospital for three days under observation, intubated to ensure that there were no complications, so that she could breathe properly, being fed by tube in the hope of gaining enough weight and barely able to be held by her parents, only during visits guided by the nurses. It's a painful experience. Melissa is fully aware of how this affects her wife even more, but a selfish part can't help feeling jealous of how she manages to hold the baby. She knows how she should just put out the arms and graciously accept the privilege of finally being able to hold Liv after everything, to feel skin-to-skin with her, as recommended, to talk tenderly to her, to tell her how much she is loved and to stroke the (y/h/c) hair. But she's scared. The tubes are gone and her daughter seems stronger than the day before, skin more flushed, eating naturally, the idea of touching her still scary. What if her hands are too rough and/or strong? It could hurt or make her hate being held by the teacher. What if the perfume bothers her? Or she doesn't even know how to hold it? After all, the first time they left the hospital with a chubby little ball and now they have a little doll that seems to weigh as a feather, fragile as glass. 

"I... No... Yes, no, I don't know." she struggles for words and the green eyes water when she notices the confused look on her wife's face, replaced by sadness "Amore mio..."  

"I know you're worried, but our little girl is strong and she'll surely love your lap." the other whispered in encouragement, looking at their daughter in her arms, already a little sleepy after feeding.  

"It scares me." the redhead confessed with a sigh.  

"Holding her?"  

"No. She..." their eyes meet and she ponders for a few seconds before explaining "I was so scared when our Liv was born and I held her in that room after I thought we'd lost her, I felt like the world had stopped and she's so small, so fragile, her tiny hands holding my finger. I felt afraid. With the slight possibility of losing her, of losing you, somehow hurting Liv in that one minute that I'm sure I'll remember for the rest of my life. And she's here."  

"With us. It was really scary, for both of us, but seeing that she's fighting gave me the strength to keep going. I confess I was scared to hold her too, the experience was like she might break in my arms or the tubes would mess up, a million possibilities ran through my head, well, until I had our little baby in my arms." Y/N settles Olivia in her arms, admiring how different she already looks after a few days of life, with a healthier appearance and her facial features appearing little by little, it's progress "Liv is here, strong, fighting, that's what matters now."  

"But..."  

"No buts, no excuses. Come here." she points to the armchair she's in, opening up a space for Mel to sit next to her, which she does without contest "Look at our girl. Ten toes, ten fingers, a cute little button nose, just like Luca's when he was born, isn't it?"  

She ponders, taking a closer look at the little face, the eyes are the same shape as Y/N's (even if it's her color), they also share the same hair color, the same mouth and ears, but the nose... it's identical to their firstborn's, which he inherited from her. Every day the boy looks more and more like her, a spitting copy. It warmed her heart. And made her a little convinced.  

"Yes, she does... And the same feet too."  

"The little chubby feet of the Schemmenti." the wife teases.  

"Hey, it's a family heirloom, chubby feet and delicious recipes make a Schemmenti." she laughs, feeling some of the tension drain away, then whispers, "And street smartness too." 

"That's a fact." both laugh and a comfortable silence hangs in the air, green eyes fixed on their daughter who begins to fall asleep calmly "Honey, do you want to try? I'm here, there's a nurse right over there." she points to the nurse at the door of the room talking to a coworker "It'll be fine. But if you..."  

"No, no, I want to try, amore mio." a sudden confidence runs down her spine and almost by instinct she puts out her arms, an apprehensive smile on the lips, a glow in the air and anxiety in her stomach, she could swear she was about to sweat through to hands "I want to hold Liv."  

The couple exchange a complicit look, trying to reassure each other, it's kind and understandable. The teacher smiles genuinely this time. When she realizes that this is really happening, the heartbeat increases and the fingertips tingle. Before can have any doubts or think about giving up, she feels the little bundle of joy being placed against her chest, and the arms instinctively wrap around the colorful blanket. The smell of baby reaches her nostrils, slightly sweet and very pleasant, the skin is soft, fine hair adorns the top of head and her eyes open in curiosity, exploring the atmosphere, who is holding her.  

"Ciao, cara mia." she whispers to the girl, admiring every little feature and movement, she seems to recognize her mom by voice.  

"You know, newborns can't see very well, but they recognize voices that they heard in the womb. And you talked to her, told her stories and even sang. She recognizes you." Y/N says with emotion and leans in, giving her wife a chaste kiss "And your voice... well, it's unique." 

"I know, that's why you fell in love with me so quickly." Melissa shrugs the shoulders smugly, internally melting with delight that the daughter remembers her and seems to like it, because when Liv hears her again quickly smiles, even though she knows it's just a spasm, it still makes her sigh, thinking it's one of the cutest things she's ever seen in the world "You like my voice, don't you, my principessa?!"  

 Her wife watches the whole interaction with admiration, never failing to stare at the sweet smile forming cute dimples, knowing that she has chosen the right person to have children with. The redhead is simply so natural with Liv as she is with LuLu, anyone can feel the love in every gesture, word and look, she understands the insecurity she had about holding the baby, but she knew that once they were together there would be no separating the duo. In addition, Olivia always seems calmer in the presence of the other woman than with her, the one who gave birth. They talk for a few more minutes until the newborn falls asleep again. No surprise, considering that babies of this age sleep around 16 hours a day and in a fragmented way.   

All said and done, Mel still didn't want to let her go and kept holding her, unable to separate herself from their youngest.  

"She still scares you?"  

"Yes." she replied, pausing between sentences, looking at Olivia with affection "She scares me how fucking much I love her."  

"No swearing around our kids, Melissa Ann Caterina Schemmenti!" 

taglist: @opheliauniverse @inlovewithmiddleagewomen @wastdstime @scarr0713 @geekyandgay98 @dvrkhcld @heidss @esposadejoyhuerta @xvyzxx @quailbagutte @imaginesmultifandoms @ctrlamira @milffilm @taurus-baby-34 @prentiss-theorem @josephinevr @cordyandbilliehavemyheart @grandtacoranchnickel @multifandomlesbianic @serendipitouswanderer @louderfortheback @h-doodles @Hotdoggitydammit @peggy082023

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Schemmenti Family Masterlist

[noodlesoup1819]

Day 5: Chronic Illness - Sigma with endometriosis

(Cw: periods / menstruation, panic attack, throw-up)

(Read on Ao3)

For some naïve reason, Sigma thought this would stop once he joined the agency.

He had woken up multiple times in the middle of the night, lightheaded, nauseous, and hurting. He had probably only gotten a few hours sleep total and what he did get was restless and uncomfortable.

This wasn’t an entirely uncommon occurrence for him. 

Sigma might only have a few years’ worth of memory, but for its entirety, he’d felt like this. Nausea and headaches. Bone deep fatigue. Joint pain and body aches. Not to mention the sensation Sigma can only describe as someone trying to chip off pieces of his hip bones as they stabbed at his organs…

Not pleasant. To put it lightly.

Regardless of how unpleasant it is, it’s how it’s always been.

Dos-kun had once explained that stress could exacerbate the symptoms of periods. And both the desert and the sky casino and everything that followed were nothing but stressful. He also told him that all periods hurt. Sigma often spent time gazing at the women he knew wondering how they did it.

While the agency was no where near stress-free, it was still leagues better that anything he’d had previous. He’d only been there a couple weeks, but…he’d still expected things to get better.

Nonetheless, Sigma had a job to do and he prided himself on doing his job well, no matter if that was the casino or here at the agency. In fact, Kunikida-san often praised his exceptional work ethic and Sigma had no intention of messing that up regardless of how he felt.

Popping a few Tylenols, Sigma finished getting dressed and headed out the door. If he was lucky, he’d have enough time to stop in the café and get a coffee and something for breakfast before he needed to head upstairs to work.

-----

With caffeine to dull his headache and a small muffin in his stomach, he’d felt a little better all morning. The Tylenol was doing it’s job and while the pain in his abdomen wasn’t exactly comfortable, he was able to go through his daily morning routine of checking his emails, filling out mission reports, and assisting the office staff with anything they asked. He’d even managed a small mission with Kenji.

But by the time the two were heading back at close to lunch time, the sharp pains in his hips and lower stomach were becoming unbearable again. It was hard to keep walking without folding over and his nausea was building quickly. As soon as the two got back to the agency, Sigma excused himself to collapse onto the floor and heave into one of the toilets in the agency’s bathroom.

“—Sigma-kun~? Are you in need of my assistance? I’d be happy to help if you’ve gotten hurt on your mission~” Yosano-sensei’s voice traveled through the door. If Sigma was honest with himself, she still scared him a little.

“No, no. Don’t worry about it. I’m alright.” Sigma called back.

“Really? Because Kenji-kun said you looked like you were in pain when the two of you got back. And I’d be happy to fix you up~.”

Getting up and rinsing his mouth out, Sigma tried to make himself as presentable as possible before opening the door. “I’m alright, Yosano-sensei,” Sigma said, trying not to grimace at the pain, “I’m not injured. And besides, I don’t think your ability would help with this anyway.”

Yosano seemed skeptical. “You sure? You’re doing a pretty terrible job of hiding the fact that you’re in pain. And what is ‘this’ anyway?”

“I’m just on my period,” Sigma sighed. “This just happens sometimes.”

“Your period is causing this? And this is frequent?” Yosano seemed concerned. “Have you ever been to a doctor about it?”

“No?... I thought that it was normal for periods to hurt?” Was that not true?

“Sigma,” Yosano started, “periods are not supposed to hurt. They can be uncomfortable, sure, but they are not supposed to cause you debilitating pain. They are not supposed to make you so sick to your stomach that you have to heave in your work’s bathroom.”

“But… I was always told…” …By Fyodor. He was told all those things by Fyodor. The person who lied and manipulated more than Dazai. The person that lied about a whole world war and used it to manipulate someone revered as a hero into a weapon of destruction. He told him that it was normal. That that was what was supposed to happen. What an idiot he was for believing that load of crap.

If it wasn’t normal, what about him was. He doesn’t have a family or a home. He doesn’t even have a place where he was born and then tossed away. He was written down on a special piece of paper and then thrust into being a pawn for everyone he’s ever met since. He doesn’t have an ideal type or romantic fantasy. He doesn’t have a strong gender identity. And now, the one thing he thought was at least somewhat normal, isn’t either. Does he even count as human at this point?

“—Sigma! Breathe!” Yosano’s voice cut through his thoughts.

Was he not breathing? No? He was breathing too much? His chest hurt and his body hurt and he can’t breathe. Is he dying?

Something grabbed his hand. “Sigma follow my breathing. You’re okay. You’re fine.” Sigma doesn’t think he’s ever heard Yosano’s voice be so comforting. As he followed her instructions breathing got a little easier again.

“Sorry—I just…”

“Sigma, it’s okay. Let’s start from the beginning, alright?”

------

After that day with Yosano-sensei, things got better.

 She gave him some stronger painkillers and nausea meds and sat him down to explain things. He learned what was normal and what wasn’t.

He learned that periods usually only last 5-7 days once a month instead of the almost 9 days twice a month he was experiencing. He learned that periods usually cause cramping and could cause other things but were all things that should be managed (as in taken care of completely!!) with over-the-counter meds. He should not throw up or feel like passing out.

But, as much as he learned what was different, he learned what was normal about him. He learned that he was aroace and that lots of people didn’t experience romantic or sexual attraction. He’d even learned that Ranpo was aromantic! And he learned the word agender. Something that described his experience with gender completely.

He’d felt…whole. Like he was a whole person. Like he was normal. Like there was hope for things to get a bit better.

He’d started playing with different ways to express himself. He was diagnosed with something called endometriosis and Yosano-sensei worked to find meds that helped him. Even though they didn’t stop things completely, his flare-ups had become manageable.

The agency had been really accommodating too. It’s become common to see Sigma cozied up on the agency couch with a heating pad and his laptop on worse days. The president said he could take the day off on those days if he wanted to, but he liked being at the agency.

“—Ku-ni-ki-da-kun~ Sigma-chan looks so lonely sitting all alone on the couch! It’s my duty as a member of the armed detective agency to make sure all our members are taken care of! You should let me go join them!”

That was a new development, too. Being invited into Dazai and Chuuya’s weird situationship has been interesting to say the least. Even though she doesn’t experience romantic or sexual attraction, they’ve grown fond of the two of them and their relationship worked well.

“I can guarantee that Sigma is not lonely the all of seven feet away that he is. And Sigma actually completes their work when she’s on the couch! You’d just use it as an excuse to nap all day!”

“He’s right, Dazai,” Sigma interjected before the two could start actually fighting. “I’m fine. I’m a bit ahead actually. We can head home a bit early if you get your paperwork done.”

Yeah… that sounded nice. Heading home early to spend the evening in with both his partners. Chuuya would probably prepare a nice bath and he could relax as much as they could. Flare-up’s weren’t pleasant, but between her concoction of meds, the agency, and her partners, they were bearable.

“Hmph. Fiiiiiine. But only because Kunikida-kun will let us leave early if I do.”

“Sigma. You’re a godsend. Please never quit the agency, please.”

Yeah… Things were pretty alright.

[secretdestinypainter]

Healing up with my broken heart:

“This is a good sign, having a broken heart. It means we have tried for something.” ~Elizabeth Gilbert

A long long time ago one of my closest friends Emily, went through a very terrible life experiencing a relationship, I Emily, went through my last breakup a few years ago. I thought I had paid my dues, cried my share of tears, and dealt with some deep wounds. I thought I was done. I was happy and in love, and talking about moving in with my friend.

One day we took a little vacation. We laughed and explored the desert excitedly talking about our dreams. Three days later I found myself sobbing on the floor of my tub, hot steam clouding around me.

Our breakup was quite beautiful aside from the shock and confusion. We looked into each other’s eyes. We smiled. We cried. We held each other. We said goodbye.

It might sound like we handled this well, and in many ways we did. We always respected one another. We never said anything hurtful or manipulative. I think that shows how much we loved and cared for one another.

But I was still a mess, deeply heartbroken and deeply depressed. It was the deepest depression I’d ever been in. I could do little more than cry and stare at the ceiling. Nothing in me wanted to stay in bed and nothing in me wanted to get out. It felt like torturous limbo with a crushing weight on my chest.

My mind couldn’t comprehend a day when I wouldn’t feel like this. Each night I fell asleep I prayed the morning would be different. But each day I woke up with a pang in my stomach and a heaviness in my heart.

Until one day I didn’t.

It wasn’t a miracle. My pain didn’t disappear in my sleep. But I started to feel better. The first day I was able to eat a little more. The next day I found myself laughing with a friend. I slowly started to be able to sleep longer hours and function more clearly. It was a snail’s pace, but it was progress.

If you’re going through a breakup right now the truth is that it will get better.

I needed to hear this over and over again from other people. When the pain is so intense it takes over everything. It’s very difficult to believe anything will change. I would call my mom in the mornings sobbing into the phone, “It still hurts. It’s not getting any better. Why does it still hurt?”

It’s supposed to hurt. Your heart is broken. You loved deeply, and now it’s over. One side of the coin is that endings are really sad. The other side is that endings are opportunities for new beginnings, and that’s really exciting, even if you can’t feel the excitement right now.

It was difficult for me to see that I was making any progress so I documented my days over those weeks. I found that there were five key things that helped me begin to heal:

I felt all the feelings.

I took advantage of my support system.

I gave myself love and compassion.

I took responsibility for my life.

I focused on me instead of him.

I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to allow yourself to grieve when your heart is broken.

Our bodies are intelligent. They can hold trauma for a lifetime. When we sob so deeply our chests heave and the tears fly out, our bodies are purging the pain. Allow this to happen. I was so tired of crying, but I would keep on doing it as I needed. I actually cried a little a few hours ago. It lessens. The pain lessens. I assure you this.

There were two or three people who were my everything during my lowest low. I used their support to get me through all of the times when I just wanted to give up on my life. I talked things through incessantly, something that can help us come to terms with the situation. Our minds need to process the change, especially if it was traumatic or sudden.

It’s really important that these are people who understand you, who are capable of being there for you in this way, and who are nonjudgmental. Someone who is going to say to you, “Honey, I am so sorry you feel like this. My heart breaks for you.” Not all of our friends and family are capable of taking on that role, and that’s okay. You just need one or two.

Through these first two steps I started to gain my own strength and identity back. I got to a point where I knew that only I could pull myself up out of it. I had enough moments of clarity through my pain that I was able to see what I needed to do for myself, and I gave myself so much love.

I honored myself and acknowledged that my heart was broken. I didn’t judge myself for being weak or stress out about being low functioning. I just let myself fall into my own arms.

I treated myself like my own daughter. I asked how I was feeling and listened to the response with compassion. I kept telling myself, “I am here for you. I am always here for you.” This type of love for myself helped the pain dissipate. It helped me to feel worthy of life again.

I am also someone, probably very similar to you, who is always looking to better myself. Nothing in life is isolated—we’re all connected and affected by one another, so I knew there were deep things about myself to look at.

Instead of focusing on my ex and why he left, I began to look at myself. I questioned what I was doing in my life that left me in relationships where men chronically abandoned me.

I didn’t put pressure on myself to figure it all out, but I allowed the question to be there. I invited the answers to come in as they needed to. I knew that whatever was most obvious was probably not the full picture — and it wasn’t.

Through a candid conversation with a very close friend, I began to discover some of my deepest fears. I realized that when I get very close to people I become afraid I will lose them, something that occurred repeatedly in my childhood.

When someone I was close to share a different perspective than mine, on some deep unconscious level I became threatened, and terrified this was the beginning of the end for us. Ironically, my fears of abandonment contributed to my relationship ending.

This kind of revelation is liberating when there is a lack of clarity in a breakup. I saw myself so much more clearly, and then I looked at the relationship from my ex’s perspective. I saw my newfound self through his eyes, and I understood how he felt. It all made sense.

One of the most important things I did that allowed me to heal was to focus on myself each time I thought of him.

This is especially true if you are not the one who wants to break up. I didn’t reach out to him at all. I gave us each space. I knew seeing him show up on social media would increase the pain so I used all my willpower to stay focused on myself. If I felt the urge to check up on him I reminded myself that I didn’t need to feel any more pain. This was enough.

I think now as a mature adult wouldn’t allow any wrong person to destroy my happiness, my success, and most importantly, my peace of mind. Loving somebody perfect is the best thing we can have and it is the best thing that could happen. But with someone who tried to ruin your abilities is not the right one. Girls you are the strongest creatures and the most valuable persons who exist, don’t let anyone bring you down or let your happiness be destroyed. Take a minute and think about who is the right one for you, more power to you guys.

[lou-struck]

Inked?

Featuring: Izuku Midoriya, Katsuki Bakugou, Eijirou Kirishima, Denki Kaminari, and Shoto Todoroki...

~ You mess with your boyfriend with the help of a few temporary tattoos.

A/n: Sorry I haven't been active this week you guys!

Izuku Midoriya- 

He is just too trusting.

When you told him that the All Might Tattoo you placed on your bicep earlier today was real, his emerald eyes widened in shock as he stares up at your seemingly unsuspecting features.

When you ask him what is wrong he just shakes his head, his scarred fingers hovering just over the design. 

“ they did it wrong.” He says quietly, “ how is it possible to spell All Might wrong?”

You pretend to be shocked and your boyfriend grabs his keys and holds out his hand to you. The look of determination on his face puts butterflies in your stomach.  “ Don’t worry, I will bring you back to the parlor myself and I will get them to fix it.“

Still holding your hand he need you to be a car and doesn’t hear your protest that it’s a prank until you are halfway to the nearest Tattoo parlor. 

When he realizes that you played a joke on him, his freckled cheeks flush pink, and he swears that he will get you back.

Katsuki Bakugou- 

It’s always fun to make Katsuki lose his cool. You  never do it  in a hurtful way, you just like to keep your Pro Hero Boyfriend on his toes. So when you saw the little bowl of pro hero tattoos in the lobby of your doctors office, you knew you couldnt just walk past them like the mature individual you are. You scan the container for a familiar looking mop of green hair and gently place it in your purse to stick on once  get home 

A couple hours later, the little Chibi Deku head is discreetly  tattooed onto your side. Your own head is resting comfortably on Katsuki’s Lap as you wait for your boyfriend to take the bait.

Finally, he notices it when your shift your position and let the long sleep shirt of his ride up a bit.. He tense up and you know you’re in trouble, but coyly you tuck the hem of the shirt down quickly.

“What the hell is that?” he mumbles making some movements. gets pouty and crosses out the tattoo with a marker and writes his own name instead. It makes you giggle and squirm but he growls and says that he is not done yet.

A bit of the pen bleeds onto his shirt but he doesn't care, he needs to remind you that you are his and only his.

Shoto Todoroki- 

“It’s amazing how talented artists are,” Shoto says looking at the sheet of temporary tattoos your brought him home from a PR Event. 

Artists were able to make and sell their fanart of all their favorite pro’s, some of the artists turned their prints into temporary tattoos, with so many sheets to choose from, this particular design caught your eye and you just had to buy it.

All the designs while well made are missing a few key details. Hiding your grin, you wait for your boyfriend to realize what is missing.

One in his image is stuck to your shoulder and you tug at your collar to give him a better view.

“Did I put this one on right?” you ask leaning a bit closer to him.

His Heterochromic eyes scan the sheet infront of him until it 

“ Wait, where is my scar? “ he asks throwing his brow and squinting at the already fading tattoo on your shoulder.

Denki Kaminari- 

At first, you thought that the temporary tattoos you ordered for your Halloween costume got lost in the mail. So when you received a package from the manufacturer months later, you were very surprised to see that your product finally got delivered to you.

The tattoos look nothing like the way they were advertised online. But boredom is one hell of a motivator and you attached those suckers to every part of you you could think of.

Just as the last one gets patted dry, Denki walks in through the front door. 

There is no design, you wouldn’t even say there is an artistic vision. You look ridiculous, and your boyfriend thinks so too. But he gives you the biggest smile and says that if you have a couple bad tattoos, he’ll get a couple bad tattoos so you can match.

Eijirou Kirishima- 

Knockoff Pro Hero Merch is everywhere nowadays, but sometimes it is so hideously done you just have to buy it as a joke.

The giant Red Riot tattoo on your wrist is no exception. Kiri’s normally rich crimson eyes are bright green and plastered on the paper vertically, and his signature bright shark toothed grin is replaced with an almost Dynamite esq scowl.

It’s so terrible you love it.

When you meet Eijirou for lunch you show him proudly and tease him saying that it looks just like him.

He laughs along with you until you lower your guard and he drips his cloth napkin in his glass of water and wipes the horrid thing away. 

Once the evil had been defeated, he takes your hand, and gently kisses the skin to apologize for his roughness.

[cutelittleriot]

Return to origin chapter 9

Sorry for a short chapter but Branch has a tail now horray! Now time for Poppy to get whacked with the angst stick.

Branch groans as he wakes up.

What happened to him the last thing he rembered was......pain......so much pain.....he doesn't even remember ever being in that much pain ever in his life.

He was doing as ok as he could but when all of sudden the pain had just skyrocketed in one go and he could hear himself screaming and while he was screaming he could hear his own bones crunch and snap and all of that. He would have taken a look but all that pain and screaming just took it out of him and he must have passed out.

There is only a slight ache in his legs now but he could move them now without having horrible pain being his reward for moving them so that's good.

Looking around he sees that Poppy is still asleep although it looks like she had some trouble sleeping if the messed up sleeping bag was any indicator.

Quietly he grabs his robe and gets out from bed when two things happen at once.

He is greeted with a dull ache at the base of his spine. He also looses his balance for some reason like there was somethingnwrong with his.....legs.

Luckily he manages to land back onto his bed. Trying again he tries to walk but is having a very difficult time to walk like something wasn't right so he has to lean on the wall for support as he makes his way out to get a better look at himself. Turning on the light in his bunker he couldn't believe his eyes.

"My legs.....what happened to my legs?!" He quietly exclaims not wanting to wake up Poppy. Gone were his normal straight legs like all trolls well most trolls have and instead were now digigrade shaped like a....a animal.

"Why" He asks himself as his ears lower in sadness. Why does this have to happen to him? Doesn't he get enough bad stuff dealt to him in life already?

Sighing he knows he has to learn to walk with these new legs of his. He keeps trying for 10 minutes and each attempt has him falling on his butt which also gives him a sharp jolt of pain at the base of his spine.

What was he doing wrong? He has been trying to walk like he would normally. Wait maybe that's the problem he shouldn't walk like he had normal feet anymore. Thinking of animals with feet similar to his new ones he begins to try and walk putting more weight on just around his pawpads mostly leaving his heels off the ground.

To his delight it works and he is finally able to take a few steps without falling. Still something feels wrong with the way he walks like something was missing but he can't guess what. Deciding to take a break for now he heads to his couch to relax and maybe yo see what was causing him so much pain on his spine. Along with pain it also feels like pressure is there like something was building up getting ready to be released that's the only way he could describe the sensation.

Laying down on his stomach as when he lays on his back or just sitting in general hurts he feels around where the pain is he stops when he feels a small lump. When he touches it can you guess what happens? Yep he is rewarded with pain!

"Can't I touch something without it hurting me?!" Branch was really starting to get sick of this. Going to the bathroom he takes a better look and it's just a small lump barely bigger than one of his pawpads. It's the same color as his fur so it shouldn't be noticeable as it's covered up by his shorts.

Sighing he isn't in the mood to cook anything right now he will if Poppy wants some when she wakes up but right now he just wants to lay down on the couch and be left alone and maybe nap a bit he doesn't know with all the stuff that's been going on he just feels overwhelmed.

Laying on his side he decides to get out the notebook he was working on and get to writing. He might have gone into great detail about the last stage he went through but it's needed. No troll should ever go through that pain. He remembers that Poppy is going to go through that exact same agony tomorrow he needs to be ready for it.

While writing the pressure that was at the base of his spine finally releases and he let's out a sigh of relief that it's gone when all of a sudden.

*Riiiip*

Ears perked up at the sound of ripping fabric he quickly reaches back only to fell something that was soft and fluffy and it was.....moving? Why could he feel his paw grabbing whatever it was that he was grabbing?!

He scrambles to the bathroom falling a few times still getting used to his new legs he looks around and has to do a double take to see if he was seeing was correct. He even washes his eyes with water and looks again and yep it was still there.

'Is that a tail?!' He so desperately wants to scream just how much more was he going to change?! It's one thing to have paws now it's another whing to have your legs rearrange their shape but it's a whole other situation when you grow a new appendage!

The tail is small at the moment it is currently wiggling a little as its only the size of one of his fingers. It's teal with black stripes in the middle of it. "Just put me out of my misery now" He groans having a tail is going to be so emberassing. And since the tail still aches he knows it's going to get bigger and longer and he isn't looking forward to it. He tries to move it but since it's so small nothing happens it seems to have a mind of its own.

He decides to just wallow in misery on his couch while writing in his notebook. It's around lunchtime when Poppy finally exits his room rubbing her eyes from sleep. "Hey Branch" She greets not like her usual happy self.

"Hey Poppy" He greets back. She goes over and makes herself a glass of oj. "Are you alright? I mean your not your usual cheery self?" He asks concerned for his girlfriend. "Its just....what I saw happen to you yesterday well.... I....I don't think I will ever be able to erase those sounds or that image in my mind. And that very same thing is going to happen to me tomorrow.I'm scared Branch I really am" She admits.

"You won't need to worry Poppy now that we know what to expect I will help you in whatever way I can I promise you that. I would pinkie promise but well this isn't the best setting for one" He says showing how serious he was.

She gasps at that as Branch doesn't ever make pinkie promises so he truly does mean it. She smiles at how caring he was being to her and she can't believe how lucky she is to have a boyfriend like him.

She looks back down at her feet seeing the pink pawpads that were growing at the moment. She knows tomorrow is the last day she will ever see them the way they are right now.

She heads back over to the couch "So anything new this morning?" She asks him. Before he can answer his traitorous tail makes a appearance by wagging as he looks at his gf. It has grown alot since this morning now it's almost to the back of his knees and it's almost at thick as his arms. He had felt it earlier and it was mostly fluff though.

Poppy gasps and near drops her cup. Her boyfriend now has a tail....he has a tail. He looks at her and it seems her mind is having trouble processing his new limb that he is quickly growing to dislike. "Branch.....you have a tail" Poppy says stating the obvious. "Yes I do" He replies back waiting for he knows what's to come next.

"I thought you having pawpads and paws was cute but this.....this takes the cake!" She says grabbing his tail making him yelp as she accidentally pulls on it just a bit by accident. Turns out his new limb is sensitive at the moment but hopefully with time it won't be as so.

Quickly she let's go apologizing before gently holding it and beginning to pet it. "Oh wow Branch it's so soft" she says amazed as she continues to pet his tail and he will not admit to her that it feels nice when she pets it.

"Wait....that also means I'm getting one! I hope it will be this fluffy!" She says excited for when her tail grows in. She begins to come up with ideas as to how she could style her tail even though they don't know if it will even look like his when it grows in.

As she says ideas he realizes he now has to cut holes in each of his pants to accommodate this new limb of his. Great just great, he gets up and heads to his closet and grabs some scissors along the way. Meanwhile Poppy is back to working on her scrapbook and soon enough all of his pants have holes in them.

After Poppy gets done with her scrapbook chapter she can't decide what to do next and is quickly becoming bored. "Braaaaanch I'm booored" She complains. "There's nothing we can do, you can't leave remember until this transformation situation is over" He reminds her and she just groans. "How about we get ready for tomorrow?" He suggests and she tilts her head confused.

"I mean gets get everything prepared for well...what's going to happen tomorrow. I got some pain medicine to help relieve it..well hopefully and we need to refreeze those icepacks cause they really did help me early on. And we also will need a......makeshift gag. Cause something tells me we are going to need one if my screaming was any indicator as to how bad it is" He explains and she nods.

It takes a few hours but soon they were both prepared for the inevitable onslaught of pain that was headed Poppy's way. They both give eachother a high five at their work and Poppy gives Branch a hug. "Thank you so much for doing for me Branch I really mean it" She thanks him and he return her hug.

"Its no problem you were there for me when I was hurting and now I'm gonna do the same for you" He says and she giggles confusing him. "What?" He asks confused. "Your tail is wagging" She says pointing to the still wagging appendage that now reaches his ankles. The tail as if sensing his anger stops and simple goes flat.

Yep he is going to hate this new limb alot,it shows how he feels all the time and the worst part is that it isn't even prehensile so he can't hold stuff with it! At least he can store stuff in it he found that out after doing some light testing on it so that's a good thing but still! He can only imagine the teasing he is going to get when he returns to the village and they see his new form.

It was getting late so he makes them some dinner and they both head to bed. "Hey Branch?" Poppy asks him. "Yeah?" He replies back. "Again thank you for this tomorrow could not come any faster I swear" Poppy jokes before turning over in her sleeping bag.

Smiling at his girlfriend he lays on his side as his new tail prevents him from sleeping on his back comfortably he tries to sleep he needs to be awake and ready to help Poppy tomorrow.

He soon falls asleep but his dreams are plagues by Poppys screams.

Sorry for a short chapter but Branch has a tail now horray! Now time for Poppy to get whacked with the angst stick.

Branchs tail is basically a raccoon tail only fluffier cause I saw art of him having one and I went yes.

His tail isn't prehensile but it's fluffy enough to where it can be used to store items sort of like trolls hair.

Branchs tail is basically a raccoon tail only fluffier cause I saw art of him having one and I went yes.

His tail isn't prehensile but it's fluffy enough to where it can be used to store items sort of like trolls hair.

Here is what Branch looks like now

[coastxlwaters]

What happened to ur thumb?!

So, this happened yesterday

0. I had a low level of light headedness and a stomach ache but I needed to get out to the barn to exercise autumn

1. Autumn wasn’t ridden for 2 days and was energetic

2. My crop and saddle felt off, I later learn they were used and modified slightly without my permission (I’m not mad at whoever did, just confused on why they did it as well have that stuff at the barn)

3. My crop and set being off, shifted my normal no anxiety routine to a “oh god, do I need to check Autumn’s back and legs for injuries?” Routine.

4. My legs were awkward trying to reposition correctly, and since autumn is used to me being a quiet and relaxed rider and caretaker that probably ticked her off, her ears were pinned back but flopping, no fucking idea what that means but I have seem some horses do it when anxious or stressed, but idk

5. The crop kept hitting the wrong place on the shoulder, I hound be able to tap once and she goes, and since I’m a rated-shows rider I can’t look down as it’s frowned upon, and have to keep my head up until the lesson or atleast course is over. So I wasn’t able to see what the difference was other than the slightly off feeling.

6. Ticked her off more that I continued to try to use the crop. MY fault, I have no fucking idea what I was doing there other than me failing to follow proper barn rules.

7. We start the course and I she goes speed demon and I could tell she was abt to do SMTH, whether it was a buck or rear I honestly don’t know nor want to find out. I just cut off and out of the course halfway through

8. I got called a coward, (JOKINGLY) so I laugh and say “fuck you than, let’s see what shit I can do now that her energy is out” and get back on.

9. Same thing as 7 but this time I don’t cut off the course and the literal next jump she bucks

10. I land HARD on her neck, I really need to check it out but my friend said she looks fine for now.

11. My hand obviously hits her neck first, my thumb taking the most damage

12. I stayed on, THANKFULLY, cause if I fell off I have no fucking idea what would have happened

13. The rest is kinda like, foggy ig, I remeber making my usual “it can’t be to bad, I lived!” And then my thumb started hurting. At first thought it was SMTH I could ride off. I was wrong and for the next 15 mins I was a mess from it, both being my birthday and smth bad happening on my birthday for th 3rd time in a row. I get home, see my finger and go “damn I’m overdramatic as hell, it’s only a minor jam”

14. Just ice it and kept it elevated the entire night

(Today)

14. No sleep last night

15. It looks weird so I prob need to get it checked for possible infection

16. I get to the doctors and expect to be laughed at for coming in with a minor jam

17. I get X-rayed cause they wanted to see if it’s fractured, told I did amazing for being actively hurt and staying still and calm during it

18. I get to the actual office, Hear I shattered the tip of my thumb and it will forever be slightly bent, get banned from horse riding for a month, (sucks for them as I won’t listen to that)

19. I pull the cancer joke on @stormbreaker-290 again while walking to the room I’m supposed to go to, since I’m MEAN-

20. I get measured for a 1 finger cast as the injury is not severe in the sense I would need a full handed cast, but apparently shattering your tip of your thumb is relatively severe, since it doesn’t happen often and will leave me with my thumb being bent slightly forever unless I decide to do an overpriced surgery. Spoiler alert, I’m broke. Doenst hurt like what I expected tho, it’s only in that category I think for a longer healing process (I wasn’t listening but it was MENTIONED) and a permanent difference in my thumb even if it’s barely noticeable.

So, yeah it’s not severe in the sense of pain, it might take a bit to heal, I’m gonna take care of autumn still obvi and completely ignore the no-riding rule. I MEAN, ILL ONLY DO WORKOUTS AND NOTHING TO BIG OR SHOW PRACTICES OK?!

It’s also on my left hand, and I’m a boring right handed person so I’m fine lol. Gonna use it to hopefully get out of school obvi, but like yeah

Preppy cast✨

[clumsiestgiantess]

Chapter 25 of The Other-world Universe; let’s hope Erica recovers from last chapter…

all chapters linked here

[The Consequences of Your Actions]

When Ivan returned, I was lying down in the place where I'd slept the week of the tunnels' construction.  My stomach churned awfully, and my thoughts spiraled into regret after regret of things I could’ve done differently — things I could’ve done to protect Erica, or prevent her from being hurt at all.

Ivan cleared his throat slightly to announce his arrival, tearing me away from thought.  "I have good news," he said softly, "Erica's alright."  I sat up immediately. "Where is she?  What happened?"  Ivan flinched away from me at my sudden movement, but quickly righted himself.  "She was out cold when I checked up on her, but the nurses told me what happened.  They said she has to stay a few nights there, maybe longer, depending on how she feels when she wakes up."  My small glimmer of excitement faded, but I was still beyond relieved that Erica was ok.  

"What happened to her?"  "A few of Erica's ribs are broken.  Thankfully they hadn't punctured her lungs or they.. might not have been able to save her.  They put her on some pain medication that makes her tired, but there's really not much else they can do.  The best thing to do is tape it up and just wait for it to heal."

"So there was no.. surgery or anything?"  When Ivan said Erica's ribs were broken, I assumed the doctors would have to go in and put them back in place, but Ivan shook his head.  "Nope, no surgery.  Apparently, the bones will grow back on their own so long as Erica does a good amount of breathing exercises, and avoids doing any fighting for the next month or two."

"Alright," I sighed relievedly, feeling a lot less awful than before.  "Oh, and my mom made you these," Ivan added, pulling out a large bag of cookies.  "I know it's not much for you, though.  You probably won't even taste them."  Regardless, I held out my hand.  "I'll take them.  Tell your mom 'thank you' for me."  He nodded.  "And thank you for staying with me, Ivan.  I don't have many friends in this world other than Erica, so it's nice to have you here."  Ivan smiled, looking slightly embarrassed.  "You're welcome."  

It was rather late, so Ivan left to get some sleep.  I decided to stay in the valley for the night, just in case.  I wasn't the least bit tired, so I ate the cookies.  As Ivan predicted, I didn't taste much at all, but it was the thought that counted.  I fell asleep briefly, but got up after a gorey nightmare involving the military people from earlier.  The rest of the night my heart pounded too quickly for me to shut my eyes longer than a quick blink.

Bright and early the next morning, Ivan came back to see me.  He looked eager to talk with me, so I knew he had good news. Without thinking, I scooped him up similarly to how I casually grabbed Erica. He yelped, fearfully clawing at my fingers wrapped around his torso, gasping for breath. “Wh- What are you doing?!” “Sorry! Sorry! I didn’t mean to pick you up like that! I- I just got a little excited,” I apologized hastily, opening my palm and cupping him gently. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?” Ivan shook his head, “No, I wasn't hurt just.. terrified.”

In the few seconds I had him in my grip, I had felt his little panicked heartbeat. “Sorry.” “It’s alright. I’m okay now.” We were silent for an awkward moment. "Oh! Erica asked me to tell you that she's alright," he told me, remembering why he’d come.  "The doctors want to keep her for two weeks at the physical therapy building, just to make sure she doesn't go off and mess up her healing process."  I gave an unamused huff.  "I bet she didn't take that very well."  Ivan laughed slightly, "No, she didn't.  Erica wanted to come out here and see you, but they wouldn't even let her do that.  I don't think the nurses trust you all that much.  They think you might pull her into another fight before she heals up."  

Though I did think it was rude of them to deny us a visit after everything I'd done for the small city, I had to admit that trouble did seem to follow me wherever I went.  I wanted to see Erica just as badly as she wanted to see me, but if the nurses thought she would be safer in the city, I'd leave her be.  "It's only two weeks, right?" I asked Ivan as I let him back down.  "Yep," he replied, "You two will survive just fine without seeing each other for a few weeks."

That's true, but Ivan doesn't know how abruptly we ended our conversation yesterday.  I'd been so shocked over the bucketload of information Erica had given me, I hadn't really thought through it all.  I planned to unpack what I learned as I made my rounds of the mountains surrounding the city.  Someone stopped me before I left, however.  

At first I thought it was Ivan, coming back to tell me more news — maybe the nurses had changed their minds.  But the man coming towards me was too old to be Ivan, though.  Mr. Stoll, maybe?  No, that was too old.  Once he got about two feet of my measurements away, I realized that it was neither of them.

"I- I know you're probably busy, so I won't stay long.  I don't know if this will even make sense, but.. did you..?"  He stopped short and re-thought about what he was trying to say — lifting his hand to shield the sun as he looked all the way up to see me.  I'd seen that kind of hesitation a few times before.  Almost anyone who met me had stumbled over their words or hesitated trying to talk with someone who they had to look almost directly up to make eye contact with.  Slowly, I sat back down in front of him, keeping a bit of distance between us so I didn't scare him off.

The little man tried again.  "Have you ever saved a mountain climber?  Specifically about five-ish years ago?"  I stared down at him, confused.  It was such a strangely specific question.  "N- Nevermind," he backtracked, "It probably has nothing to do with you."  Just as he turned to leave, I jogged my memory of what I did five years ago.  That was around the time I'd convinced myself to completely control Erica.  Not a great point in my life.  However, the strangeness of his questions caused a forgotten memory to resurface.  

"Wait!  Come a bit closer," I asked before he got too far.  The man hesitantly took a few steps in my direction, unwilling to get any closer to me than that.  I gently bent all the way down from my sitting position, so my eyes were somewhat on his level.  Now that I could properly see him, I gasped, recognizing him.  "You.. You're the guy who was stuck on the side of the mountain!" I realized, dumbstruck.  "I saved you invisibly because I was afraid of how you might react if you saw me."

His eyes went wide and he took a step back.  "So that was you?  You're the invisible being that saved my life?"  I nodded, sitting back up.  "I guess so."  The man chuckled in bewilderment.  "Wow.. I'm..  My name's Evan Felton.  It's an honor to finally meet you.  When I found out that one of your inhuman abilities was to become invisible, I realized my mystery hero might've been you."  Smiling fondly down at him, I nodded to the Cavern City.  "How did you find this place?" I asked, "I hope the apocalypse hasn't affected you too badly."  

He sighed, rubbing the back of his head tiredly.  "I lived in Barideen.  You know, the city the giants captured under that tent?"  "Woah, you lived there?"  "Mhm.  With my family — a wife and two kids," he replied.  "They're all safe now, thanks to you.”  He looked up at me thankfully, then his brows furrowed.  “You know, there are some people who speak ill of you in there," Mr. Felton said, turning towards the city.  "I have no clue why, other than the fact that they're just not used to the concept of a good-at-heart giant."  I turned warily to the city as well.  Through the barrier, I could still see the jagged evidence of my rampage months ago.  "Well," I admitted, "You don't know about my history with this particular city."

Mr. Felton turned back to me, slightly confused.  "You see, when I first came across this place, there was a dome of rock over the entire thing.  See where the rock ledges cut off abruptly around the perimeter of the city?  That all used to be part of the mountain.  It covered up everything so naturally that giants couldn't find it.  There was a bit of a.. misunderstanding.  I ended up tearing down the rock ceiling, exposing the place, and almost getting everyone inside captured.  Thankfully I managed to save them, but they probably still don't like me all that much."

"Huh," Mr. Felton mused after a while, "I guess that explains it.  You did fix everything with the barrier, but I can see why they might not trust you."  I nodded, glancing down the valley.  All this talk of my duties towards the Cavern City made me remember what I'd originally intended to do.  "I have to go survey the mountains now.  I'm sorry to leave like this, but it's my job."  He nodded, "Alright, thanks for talking to me.  I'll have to find some way to pay you back for what you've done for me.  This is the second time you've saved my life, and my family's, now, too."

I shook my head, "Oh!  Mr. Felton, you don't have to do anything for me!  I'm glad I could help."  He disagreed.  "No, I insist!  And please just call me Evan.  Mr. Felton was my father.”  I chuckled, “Evan it is, then.”  “Whenever I think of something I can do for you, I'll let you know."  "Alright," I gave in, "Until then."  The little man headed back into the city, and I began my patrol of the mountains.  My spirits had been lifted some by the unexpected visit.  It was nice to see the results of my hard work fighting to keep everyone safe.

I happily continued along my route, but when I came to the western side, I stopped dead in my tracks.  All the bodies from the day before were gone.  The others from the camp must've come back to reclaim them.  I was hoping to leave some sort of message with them — warning the scientists to stop capturing people or threatening me and the city.  However, the bodies themselves might’ve sent that message just fine without a note.  

Tomorrow I'll have to do a reconnaissance mission over to their campsite to see how they reacted to Erica's little killing spree.  That day just wasn't a good day to do it.  I wanted at least a small break from the scientists and military people.  Also, I was still holding out hope that some doctor might overrule the nurses' decision to keep Erica inside for a whole two weeks.  I had to keep reminding myself that it would be healthier for her to stay in the city, no matter how desperately I wanted to talk to her, or even just see her.

On the following day, Ivan greeted me yet again.  He had no news to report other than Erica was miserable and the doctor had approved her two-week-long stay at the physical therapy center.  Before he left, I asked him if he could find a way to get a message to either Mr. Stoll or Ms. Ashford.  I wanted at least one of the founders to know that I was heading out to the scientists' camp.  I took an extra long time eating breakfast, hoping to stall myself until either of them came to address me.  Finally, Mr. Stoll came strolling out of one of the tunnels leading to the Cavern City.  "I was told you wanted to talk with one of the founders," he said gruffly.  "What is it?"

"I just wanted you to know that I'm heading to the scientists’ camp to see how they reacted to the fight a few days ago."  Marcus raised his eyebrows in surprise, "I was going to ask you to do that yesterday, but Ms. Ashford insisted I give you more time to rest."  "I would like that, actually,” I admitted, “But I'm anxious that they might be planning some kind of nefarious revenge."  "Then by all means, go check it out!  Should I summon that boy to help you?"  "Who, Ivan?" I asked, "No, let him have a break.  I'm just going to scout out the place.  I'm not doing any fighting."  Marcus only shrugged and turned to head back into the city.  

About an hour's walk from the mountains, I came upon the site of the scientists' camp.  I almost hadn't recognized it.  Everything was gone.  The only way I realized I was in the right place was because of the abandoned city at its center.  Was it really that easy to scare them off?

Somehow I doubted the terrifying head scientist from the radio broadcast would've simply given up.  Then again, if they were only regrouping to attack later, why would they give up a perfectly good camp?  Unless, of course, they just changed locations because I knew where this campsite was.  My idea from a few days ago sprang up again.  What if the scientists just moved to a further, unprotected spot to capture innocent people where I couldn’t protect them?

Predicting their strategies was already making my head hurt.  After walking around invisibly and double-checking that the camp really was gone, I made the return trip back to the Cavern City.  My report to Mr. Stoll was quick.  The only thing to say was that the camp was gone.  I gave him a few of my theories as to why, then left him to it.

Every night during those two weeks, I slept in the valley, just in case something happened with Erica that I needed to be there for; also just in case the scientists were planning a sneak attack on the city.  Either way, I would be right there at the ready if anything too out-of-the-ordinary happened.  Ivan came to talk with me at least once a day.  I decided not to say anything to him about the recent battle — only that Erica had been an amazing fighter, but was hit quite violently by one of the military people.  

Mr. Felton..  Well, Evan, also came by a second time to offer me thank you letters that his family, and many others, had made for me.  It was touching to know so many people saw me as a hero, not just some mistake-prone giant. Even if they were too afraid to deliver the letters themselves.  

As well as continuing my surveillance, I also continued healing up my bruises.  I brought re-freezable ice packs into the other-world to ease them away.  Between those letters and the occasional visits from other-worldian friends, life was starting to feel comfortable again.  The only thing missing — the biggest thing missing — was Erica.

[notsocheezy]

V-Day - The End of the Beginning

Yesterday I woke up from another night of little sleep and much acid. I took Pepto Bismol just about as fast as they'd let me - hourly - throughout the night, and it only barely took the edge off enough to "sleep" sitting up with my head at a bizarre angle. Eventually the nurse got the go-ahead to give me Prevacid, which I'd never taken before but I was willing to try anything.

To its credit, it did reduce the acid in my stomach. But it did so by flushing it out the other way, so I woke up with a tummy ache. Great.

Listen, you really don't want to experience a tummy ache while your tummy is literally riddled with slices. There are glued-together incisions all over my abdomen, some of which certainly go straight through the abs. That explains why it hurts so bad to cough, and to vomit for that matter. Or laugh. Wasn't doing much of that last one, though.

Anyway, I spent the morning in and out of the bathroom, but it wasn't loose like before, so I was confident I could go home. The doctors came in, removed the catheter (OUCH! FUCK!) and offered to remove the packing and teach me dilation right away or some back later. I said "come back later" - my urethra was on fucking fire!

I took that time to pack and try to remember how to pee. I didn't have to pee yet, so it was purely academic, but I did go for a bit of a walk by myself - not something I was inclined to do while holding a bag of piss. But moving around was good for me, and I finally peed in the toilet. It was a damn mess. I was warned, I suppose, I just hope it stops doing that when the swelling goes down.

At this point I knew my indigestion would only get worse if I didn't eat something, but I also knew I desperately needed safe foods. I ate some of what the hospital gave me that day, but it did nothing for me. I needed my black bean crunchwrap. I would not be able to properly rest without it. Granola made a poor substitute.

Honestly, tangent here, but what the hell did that hospital kitchen have against beans? They had green beans, but other than that? Forget it. They had goddamn cheesesteaks but I couldn't get a comforting and nutritious burrito even if I asked. Disgraceful.

Another disgrace was that hospital bed. It was tilted to the right. If you have GI issues, you might immediately recognize the problem here, but I'll explain anyway: Sleeping on your left side reduces acid reflux symptoms, but I was unable to do so since I had a catheter. I had to sleep on my back. But you see, while I slept on my back I was sleeping in the worst orientation for my esophagus. I never had a chance.

The surgery team came back, un-slurped my packing gauze, and taught me how to dilate a little bit too aggressively. It as fucking painful. But at least that meant I'd done everything I had to do to go home. It was just a waiting game at this point. I used some of my remaining time to try dilating again in private, and it was still awful but at least I managed to hold the smallest one about halfway in for ten minutes. A decent slow start.

This is running long, so I'll gloss over the rest. I got carted out in a wheelchair, enjoyed the cool breeze, and took a bite of that black bean crunchwrap. I knew then that I'd be alright.

I got home, showered, and properly slept for the first time in days. I'm alive again. I'm back.

[averysmolbear]

This is all just self ship stuff so it’s okay not to read it. ☺️ It’s just an expanded on version of the not so little family post for my self ship with Reiner.

When we found out that I was pregnant for the first time, Reiner was ecstatic. He had been hoping for it after all but I was nervous as hell. Of course Reiner took it upon himself to buy every parenting and pregnancy book that he could get his hands on, only for him to get frustrated when finding contradicting advice in various books.

“Seriously,” Reiner said as he slammed the book he was reading closed, “why can’t they all just tell you to do the same thing? How am I supposed to know which way is right?”

I look over at him with a small smile, setting aside the yogurt parfait that Reiner had painstakingly made for me earlier. “I think that’s because we’ll figure it out as we go along,” I said with a shrug, reaching out to turn his face toward me.

A slow smile started to tug at the corners of his mouth as he looked at me, nodding. He placed a hand on my stomach, which was still the same soft belly it had been before we found out I was pregnant since I wasn’t showing yet. Reiner took a deep breath before placing a soft kiss on my lips.

“You’re right,” he said, tossing the book aside. “I just hoped to have a hang of it before the little nugget got here.”

“That what we’re calling him or her?”

Reiner grinned as he shifted to lay down on the couch so he could rest his head in my lap. He was a bit cramped on the couch but he never asked me to move, just curling his long legs up a little more as he looked up at me. “Why not? We should call the baby something other than ‘it’, right?”

I reached for my snack again to finish it off but between bites, I played a little with Reiner’s hair. “Nugget it is.”

It wasn’t long before he started panicking though because the closer we got to the baby being born, the more he wondered if he was cut out to be a dad. His own father hadn’t been a part of his life after all and Reiner began to wonder if he would mess up the child’s life by not being a good enough father.

He had long talks with my dad and his uncle and other people to get a better sense of what he was getting himself into but he never once regretted his decision to start a family with me. In fact Reiner was so confident that I could pick up the slack in the areas where he might be lacking. I reminded him that he did a wonderful job of being a big brother figure to his cousin, Gabi, and that while there wasn’t a huge age difference between him and Eren or Armin, he had been a good big brother figure to them too. The only difference now was going to be that this was our child but he already had it in him to be a good, strong role model.

When Amelia was born, Reiner cried more than I did. He was so happy but he worried that he would hurt her when he held her. He just kept commenting about how he couldn’t believe how tiny she was (the doctor kept reminding Reiner that Amelia was actually average for a baby) and Reiner couldn’t understand how we had made something so tiny and beautiful, although he would always add that Amelia had to take after me because she was so perfect.

He slept with the baby monitor on his side of the bed and for the first week, Reiner didn’t get much sleep. He wanted me to sleep through the night as much as possible so he tried to catch every little cry Amelia made to make sure she had whatever she needed. He was surprised at how quickly I was able to tell the difference in the way Amelia cried if she needed a diaper change or needed to be fed or just wanted to be held. Reiner soon, however, was able to pick up on the differences too and he was the most attentive but nervous dad.

“She’s tiny,” Eren said, watching as Amelia got some tummy time on a blanket on the floor. “At least she takes after her mom. If she took after you, she’d be one ugly kid.”

“Eren!” I peeked my head in from the kitchen to see Armin sitting on the floor, shaking a rattle at Amelia while Eren watched from the couch. He looked up at me and shrugged.

“He’s right,” Reiner added, moving as soon as he heard Amelia fuss a bit. He scooped her up easily and laid her on the couch. “She gets her looks from you. Actually she gets a lot from you.”

I shook my head to return to making lunch for us. Soon Eren was joining me in the kitchen, gesturing toward the fridge. I frowned slightly, not knowing what he was asking about.

“Reiner said to get a bottle for Amelia,” he said, shrugging. He watched as I grabbed the bottle of pre pumped breast milk, taking it when I handed it to him.

“You two are good parents, you know,” Eren added as he started out of the kitchen. “Just don’t tell Reiner I said that.”

When I found out that I was pregnant again, Reiner and I felt more prepared. And then came the news that I was having twins. They ran in my family but were kind of rare so I hadn’t expected to find out that we would be having twins. Reiner seemed calm until we got home. In fact, he was so concerned that we didn’t tell anyone that it was going to be twins until I was much further along, especially since I ended up on bedrest for the last couple of months. That actually wound up scaring Reiner to the point that he refused to let me hold Amelia at all toward the end of the second pregnancy.

When they were born, we worried a little about being overwhelmed by having 3 in diapers. Luckily Amelia was getting closer to hitting an age where she’d be walking and she was eating mostly solid foods. She was even drinking out of a sippy cup and had started trying to talk and feed herself with finger foods by the time the boys were born. Of course my parents and Reiner’s mom stepped up a lot once Mathias and Milo were born to help out whenever they could but for the most part Reiner and I were able to mostly handle things on our own. It helped that Amelia was so well behaved though.

Reiner and I took turns getting up for the kids whenever one of them fussed at night but Amelia was sleeping through the night by the time her brothers were born so it was mostly changing and feeding the boys.

We were confident parents by the time Isobelle was born. Amelia was potty trained and while the boys weren’t there yet, they were still getting closer to that point by the time we added another baby to the mix. Of course once Mathias and Milo were up and walking, we had to double down on some of the baby proofing of the house. They weren’t just more curious than Amelia had been; they were downright trouble together. In fact they were often sneaking out of their pay pen if someone wasn’t keeping a close enough eye on them. They didn’t misbehave too much but they were a handful and even as they reached toddler age, one would play lookout while the other tried to get something that they were told they couldn’t have.

Luckily for us Amelia was good at helping to keep an eye on her siblings even at the age of five, which was around the time that Everett came along. By this point, all of the other children were potty trained (or close to it with Isobelle still in pull ups) and they were all walking and talking. It was slightly more chaotic, especially once Reiner and I were fully outnumbered by the children but we were so used to having a baby around that it wasn’t difficult for us to keep up with all of them. Plus we had help from family and friends more often than not, with even Eren and Armin or Annie or Porco and Pieck offering to watch the kids if we needed a break.

When I found out I was pregnant one last time, Reiner and I thought we had it all in hand. Of course the last pregnancy was a bit rougher on me. I had the worst morning sickness and the doctor was a little concerned about my blood pressure. Because of this, Reiner doted on me throughout the pregnancy and he made sure that I didn’t try to do too much. By this time though we had 3 in school and only 2 at home still. With the help we got from family and friends, things went as smoothly as we could have hoped for. Theodore was a bit premature (and the smallest of the babies I’d had) but he was a healthy baby.

Reiner did worry a little more about Theodore but like his siblings before him, he progressed through each milestone on time or even early. It helped that Amelia liked to sit and read to her younger siblings once she learned how to read and Theodore had 3 older brothers who always included him in whatever they were playing even if he was still too young or small to be able to play along.

(Also Amelia being called nugget stuck and even as she grew up Reiner called her nugget. Mathias and Milo were our peanuts. Isobelle was our bug. Everett was our bean. Theodore was our jelly bean. And yes, Reiner will still refer to each of them by those nicknames whether they like it or not. And Theodore went from being the smallest to the biggest of the kids, standing at 6’ tall as a teenager and he could pass Reiner’s height by the time he’s done growing.)