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riotwritesthings · 10 months ago

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Unrequited Dreams

WinterIron, M, 3.5k - Soulmate AU, Angst, hopeful ending

I can finally share my piece from the Reforged WinterIron Zine! I'm so excited, I'd had the idea for this fic for years and it was delightful to finally bring it to life. And now I get to share!

Thank you to all the mods over at @reforgedzine for making this happen!

~~~

The night before his thirteenth birthday Bucky is so excited he can barely fall asleep, because he’s going to have his first dream about his soulmate.

The anticipation has been building for weeks, for years; his family has taken to fondly rolling their eyes because Bucky can't talk about anything else. He can’t wait to find out something, anything about his soulmate, about how they'll meet for the first time. He can't wait to start trying to make sense of the hazy details the dream will leave him with.

In the morning, Bucky wakes up sobbing, because now he knows that his soulmate is gorgeous and graceful. That knowledge is crystal clear even if few other details are.

And now, Bucky knows that he's going to put a gun in his soulmate's face and pull the trigger.

Thirteen year old Tony wakes up feeling cold and hollow except for a sharp ache settling deep in his chest.

Apparently, it was stupid to be excited, just like Howard always said. Because now he knows that their first meeting involves his soulmate pushing him away.

Literally.

Tony knows that dreams are funny things. He read all about soulmate dreams and how easy it is to misinterpret them, how they tend to exaggerate, back when he was dumb enough to look forward to them. But he would swear that the shove felt hard enough to knock the air from his lungs, felt strong enough to throw him clear across the room.

The ache in his chest lingers the entire day, and every morning that he wakes up from the same dream, the pain is agonizingly fresh, digging a little deeper.

So Tony grows up and learns how to push people away first. He tells himself that when he meets his soulmate, he’ll be ready.

Bucky never tells anyone about the dream, even when his parents give him concerned looks. Eventually people stop asking.

Every time he has the dream, Bucky remembers a little more. His soulmate is dressed in mostly black, moving gracefully and carelessly through a room in chaos. His soulmate has gorgeous eyes and a wicked, beautiful smirk.

Every time, Bucky shoots his soulmate in the face and wakes up nauseous.

At least when he joins the army, no one else talks about their dreams either. Most nights, Bucky is too exhausted to dream at all, and it’s almost a relief when nightmares start to overtake the few times that he does.

Most nights, Tony drinks until he falls into a short, restless sleep, just to avoid the one dream he doesn't want to have.

He doesn’t want to see his soulmate’s cold, emotionless eyes. He doesn’t want the all-too-brief feeling of his soulmate's hand beneath his own before he's shoved away.

When Tony does dream, it’s of clenched fists, feeling frustrated, helpless. Feeling like his entire life is falling apart around him, and it’s all so stupid.

So he refuses to figure out any other details because he’s already going to have to live through it at some point. He doesn't want to know if that fleeting contact of hand against hand is a first meeting, doesn’t bother trying to remember anything about the large, bright room the dream takes place in or the people around them. He doesn’t care if it's a charity gala or something else. None of it matters.

Tony wakes up and drinks more.

He builds and smiles for the press. He does his best to not lose the few people he has, and tells himself that he won’t care when his soulmate doesn’t want him.

Sometimes he even believes it.

The Winter Soldier doesn’t dream at all.

Not during the short, fitful sleep he gets on missions. Certainly not while he’s frozen.

He forgets.

When the moment finally happens in real life, they don’t recognize it.

Bucky isn't in his right mind. He’s barely clinging to awareness past the hold of the conditioning in a room in chaos. He doesn't recognize the graceful motions of the gorgeous man who jumps into the fight, or the moment he points his gun in the man's face.

The bullet doesn't connect, and when Tony doesn't die, the Winter Soldier rips his hand away from Tony’s, shoves him across the room and knocks the air out of his lungs.

Tony isn’t thinking about the brief contact of his hand on Barnes’ over the barrel of a gun, of Barnes’ hand splayed across his chest. He’s thinking about the fact that his life is falling apart, and that he needs to stop a rampaging Winter Soldier. He doesn’t have time to think about the splinter itching at the back of his mind.

They don’t even notice when they stop having the dreams, after that moment.

Tony is alone in his workshop, in the too-empty compound, when it hits him that he doesn’t even remember the last time he dreamt of his soulmate.

It’s not just because he barely sleeps, not just because when he does dream it’s of his friends falling from the sky, of cities and worlds crashing to the ground. He’s spent so much time trying to ignore the dream, apparently he’s even been ignoring the fact that it’s gone.

It’s a stupid thing to be upset about.

Tony has always known how they would feel about him, known they wouldn’t want anything to do with him, but he still has to sit on the cold tile floor as his legs give out. He blinks back tears, wondering how far he must have fallen, if he doesn’t even deserve a soulmate who pushes him away anymore, doesn’t deserve anyone.

He wonders if his soulmate dreams about someone else now.

Bucky is in Wakanda, trying to find peace, when a doctor asks about the dream.

For a second Bucky doesn’t remember. And then he does. And he can’t breathe.

He doesn’t dream much anymore. When he does, it’s always nightmares. He hasn’t dreamt of his soulmate since before the war.

Before the Soldier.

And Bucky realizes he’s probably already killed his soulmate, and doesn’t even remember it. Everything goes fuzzy.

No one asks about the dreams again. Bucky has so many regrets to move past, he just shoves this one down with all the others. His soulmate is probably long gone. There’s no need to think about it.

So, he tries not to.

Having everyone back at the compound is exactly as awkward-as-hell as Tony thought it would be. It only makes him feel a little better that he’s clearly not the only one feeling it.

The reasoning is sound, the threat is coming, but that doesn’t mean Tony has to be happy about it.

But he smiles, shakes hands when he has to, and reminds himself this is for the best. He can bury his hurt feelings for the good of the world. He can be an adult, pretend everything is fine. He shows everyone to the residential wing, despite most of them already knowing their way around, and doesn’t meet anyone’s eyes as he says to make themselves at home.

Slowly, they start putting the team back together. There’s lots of talks about trust and honesty that feel hollow and stilted, but Tony supposes it’s progress.

They still work well together in the field, but that was never the Avengers’ problem.

Around the compound, though, the split remains obvious. Everyone seems torn between walking on eggshells and the urge to act like nothing’s changed even though it has, Tony among them.

The different sides of the war still give each other wide berths in the hallways, and Steve still stands protectively between Tony and his shadow of a best friend when they happen to run into each other in the gym.

Tony spins on his heel with a lazy wave, doesn’t even care if he’s too obvious. For just a moment, Tony’s gaze meets Barnes’ as he turns.

For just that moment, Tony finds himself caught in that deep blue stare before the doors slide closed behind him.

Bucky spends a lot of time wandering the compound.

He’s aware everyone thinks it’s a paranoid-perimeter-check thing, which it partially is. But it's also just him enjoying the novelty that he can spend his time wandering aimlessly. He can go where he wants when he wants, never has to sleep unless he chooses to.

He’s still getting used to it; remembering how to enjoy the freedom.

Which is how he runs into Stark in the kitchen at three AM, when he’s trying to outrun his nightmares. Tony is apparently making pancakes.

Bucky freezes in the doorway as they stare at each other. Just when he’s preparing to back away, Stark’s lips curl into a tiny smile. Stark tips his head towards the rest of the kitchen, obviously inviting him to stay instead. Bucky grabs an apple and sits at his usual spot at the far end of the table, trying to look comfortable, and it’s somehow easier than he’s expecting.

It’s only a couple minutes before Stark finishes making and neatly stacking his pancakes on a plate. Then he dumps everything in the dishwasher and shoots Bucky only the briefest look before leaving with his plate of food.

Bucky tells himself to avoid the kitchen around that time. He should give Stark some space, because he’s so clearly uncomfortable with everyone being back.

But two sleepless nights later, Bucky’s feet carry him on a familiar path without thought.

Stark is making waffles this time. He barely even looks up as Bucky takes up the same space at the table. Stark glances at him again as he’s preparing to leave, at the power bar Bucky’s been picking at, then transfers one waffle to a smaller plate. He sets the small plate on the table, just within Bucky’s reach. Then to Bucky’s surprise, Stark sits at the counter instead of leaving.

Bucky pulls the plate closer, and they eat in total silence. They’re not even facing each other and Bucky is actually a little relieved. He doesn’t know what to say to anyone these days, much less Stark.

It’s the first time they’ve done more than pass in the hallways, but it’s not as uncomfortable as it should be. When Tony stands to leave with a wave and a small, warm smile, Bucky finds himself disappointed.

As the weeks go by, Tony notices Barnes getting more comfortable around the compound, sometimes with Steve but most often alone.

Not that Tony lets himself wonder why he cares, why he scrolls through security feeds of the hallways like he needs to check on Barnes. It’s just morale has been slowly improving, and that’s the last bridge Tony has to mend. Or, the last bridge to build from scratch over a giant chasm, in this case.

He’s coming back late from a charity event, a little tipsy with plans to head to the lab, but gets sidetracked when he passes through the living room and realizes Barnes is on the couch watching Star Trek. Tony pauses for a second, filled with nostalgia, but he tells himself to leave Barnes to his marathon in peace.

To his surprise, Barnes looks at him with a tiny smile, unsure but devoid of suspicion or impatience. Tony sinks into an armchair, asking himself why. They proceed to watch four and a half episodes in silence.

Tony wakes up to Steve and Sam clomping through after their morning run, slumped down in the chair with a blanket carefully draped over him.

It becomes a habit, and Barnes becomes Bucky, even if they haven’t actually spoken yet.

So maybe Tony has FRIDAY alert him when Bucky is queuing up the next episode so he can head to the living room. After the first time, though, Bucky waits for him to arrive before hitting play and greets him with a smile that gets brighter every time.

Tony doesn’t let himself wonder about the why’s. Like why he spends so much time simply existing in the same room as Bucky, why that doesn’t feel awkward at all. Or why it seems to be the only thing that helps Tony ignore the empty pit in his chest.

One night, Tony realizes he hasn’t seen Bucky in a while. There’s been no marathon nights despite being due to start Next Generation. He tells himself it’s not creepy to flip through security feeds., He’s just curious how Bucky is spending his sleepless nights now.

Tony’s heart leaps into his throat when he finally locates Bucky on the roof of the hanger, standing on the ledge. He’s breathless by the time he makes it to the hangar, heart racing and legs shaking from the sprint. He doesn’t even know what he thinks is happening, except…

Bucky looks at him with wide, exhausted eyes when Tony bursts through the door, and he could swear Bucky’s shoulders drop in relief. Tony doesn’t have time to think. He just starts talking, because Bucky looks so haunted, and Tony knows a thing or two about distractions.

They’re still on the roof when the sun comes up., And Bucky has to stop pointing out all the constellations he can remember while Tony fills him in on the new star science he’s missed.

After the roof, something shifts.

Bucky can’t put his finger on exactly what it is, or even when it happens. But that one stilted conversation about the stars becomes less stilted conversations about whatever’s on TV becomes friendly debates about the merits of different toppings as they make pizza at midnight.

Before Bucky knows it, he feels like he’s home.

He finds a groove with his new life and starts branching out, starts connecting with the rest of the team. He’d almost forgotten what it felt like to be a person. To actually interact when he passes people in the hallway and eat with a group.

To be more than a ghost, to be part of something good.

Always though, he gravitates back to Tony. Because Tony actually makes him laugh and it fills a void in his chest Bucky has long gotten used to. Because Tony is always trying to do better and god Bucky wants to learn how.

Because when Tony’s been on an inventing binge, Bucky can trick him into taking a nap by putting on home improvement shows, and it makes Bucky feel like he’s doing something right. The team smirks when they walk in on Tony drooling on his shoulder, but it’s not like that.

He recognizes the look Steve and Natasha start to give him, smug and knowing. And fine, maybe Tony would have been exactly his type, before. But it’s not like that.

Because Bucky is the man who killed his soulmate. He doesn’t let himself think about that kind of thing.

When Bucky decides that he wants to officially join the Avengers, Tony leaps at the chance to make him new gear.

He does the same for the entire team, after all, making sure everyone’s safe. It doesn’t make Bucky special. No matter what the wide grins from Rhodey try to imply.

Tony just loves a challenge, loves the excuse to build something new. So maybe he gets more input from Bucky than anyone else, offers to help Bucky test all the gear on top of team training, but it’s not an excuse to spend more time together. He just sees what Bucky is trying to do, and he’s all too familiar with that struggle.

Despite the knowing looks from everyone, it doesn’t mean anything that he lets Bucky into the lab to see the prototypes, even if it is Tony’s only place of solitude in the compound. Even if eventually Bucky just hangs out there with him for hours.

Tony keeps telling himself it means nothing.

Watching Bucky try to teach DUM-E checkers is the final straw, though. Warmth fills Tony’s chest so fast and hard that he can’t breathe around it. And he finally admits that maybe it all means something.

But Tony is the man who doesn’t deserve a soulmate, who never even got to meet them. Who’s not sure he’d want to meet them anymore, as guilty as it makes him feel.

Maybe he can’t lie to himself anymore. Maybe he’s completely in love, but Tony knows better than to say anything.

Days spent in the lab with Tony run together in the best possible way. It’s a blur of playing with the bots, watching Tony create the future, and trying to convince him maybe the new reboots of Star Trek do have something to offer.

Bucky knows what a privilege it is to be here, to see Tony at his most relaxed and occasionally unhinged. He tries not to let it go to his head, give him ideas, even though every day he falls more in love. He’s even getting used to the pangs of guilt over the soulmate he should miss.

Until one day they’re watching a movie on the lumpy couch in Tony’s lab. When it’s revealed that Tony called the plot twist from the very beginning, he smirks at Bucky at just the right angle.

Bucky’s heart drops into the floor.

He knows that smirk. He’s seen it a thousand times in a thousand dreams, even if he hasn’t had it in years, he remembers.

And of course it’s Tony, who’s smart and gorgeous, graceful and just the right amount of wicked. Who Bucky already loves so much he can’t breathe sometimes.

Tony, who he still can’t possibly deserve.

So Bucky says nothing, as happy as he thinks he’ll ever be. Tony is here, alive. Bucky’s soulmate is too smart and too tough to die. Bucky gets to watch the way he laughs when their friends do something stupid, to watch Tony’s back in fights while they both try to do better.

He’ll never get to taste the edges of Tony’s smile, but he shoves that aside. Tony is alive. That’s more than enough.

Tony’s first thought when he wakes half-buried under rubble is that he’s officially over alien invasions. The second is that the power of the suit fading in and out, causing the concerned shouting over the comms to cut in and out, is really not helping with his throbbing head.

The aliens swarm into what’s left of the nightclub, stealing his attention before Tony can work up the breath to answer, and all the suit’s questionable power has to go to blasting the ones that get too close. The oversized bug-like soldiers just keep coming, and Tony starts to wonder if he’d be better off ditching the deadweight of the armor.

But he’s not sure he can make a run for it. His head is spinning and he’s dimly aware of blood filling the suit, and the aliens are still coming—

There’s a roar of approaching gunfire and then Bucky is bursting into the destroyed building, wielding a large knife and the only gun Tony has built in years.

And the thing is…Tony knows those movements.

He knows that brutal fighting style, the blank rage in those blue eyes. He recognizes the wrath of the Winter Soldier. He’d been dreaming of it most of his life.

Tony can’t believe he never put it together before, because of course it’s Bucky. Resilient and brave and so kind, Bucky who still deserves so much better than Tony. Of course.

Maybe it’s just easier to recognize him with unconsciousness trying to drag Tony under. Maybe Tony’s already dreaming.

He must be, because suddenly Bucky is leaning over him. His eyes are warm, and scared. Tony doesn’t know this part of the dream, doesn’t know what happens next.

Everything is going black. Tony struggles to find his words, to plead. To beg not to be shoved away again.

Bucky sits unmoving beside Tony’s hospital bed for three days, even though all he wants to do is run.

He saw the recognition in Tony’s eyes, he knows that Tony knows. He wants to leave before Tony asks him to, because what else could Tony want from a soulmate like him?

But that’s not what Tony had said. Tony asked him to stay while sounding so scared, so resigned. Like he knew Bucky wouldn’t and it was already breaking his heart.

So, Bucky stays.

He’s staring at his fists, trying to stop himself from wondering, when the heart monitor starts beeping triple time, giving away that Tony is awake. Bucky jerks his gaze up to meet Tony’s big brown eyes, watches the flashes of fear and hope that go through them.

Bucky knows he must look terrible, hasn’t slept or shaved in days. He’s barely eaten, and he can feel the lines of worry set into his face. But Tony’s still looking at him with something like awe, just because he’s here.

When Tony smiles nervously the wave of hope that crashes over Bucky nearly overwhelms him, could crush him beneath it.

Bucky smiles back.

#my fic #winteriron #starkbucks #bucky/tony #bringing angst to the soulmate party #IM SO EXCITE TO SHAREEEEE

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maxhpart · 23 days ago

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👁️ Which specters surround you in the dark?

This is my piece for @dotzines' Red Zone 3: Horror, with the pose by @adorkastock (frankenstocked by me). The zine's theme itself was a step outside of my comfort zone, but I was inspired to represent some anxious mental woes (intrusive thoughts, paranoia, hypervigilance, regrets, nightmares, etc.) in a symbolic way. To everyone who struggles with those, whether frequently or not: stay hearty 💪💚

#halloween #artists on tumblr #horror #eerie #spooky #scary #my art #original art #maxhpart #anxiety #mental health #body horror #cw body horror #cw bugs #id in alt text #trying something new!#portfolio

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thelocalmuffin · 1 day ago

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Summary:

Drayton really had to do something about that battle hungry champion that was making the club a nightmare. It was a good thing he met a sweet, charming kid from Paldea that could get the job done. Everybody wanted the club to go back to normal. So why was he having so many internal struggles with what he was doing?

This was my piece I wrote for the @astellaradventurezine! This is a character analysis on Drayton and his actions throughout the DLC!

If you are interested in seeing the spot art that was included with this story along with everyone's beautiful pieces in one spot, please check out the zine here for free too!

#stellar adventure zine #muffin's projects #muffin writes #zine piece #drayton pokemon #drayton elite four #pokemon #pokemon scarlet and violet #pokemon scarlet dlc

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uglypastels · 4 months ago

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Ngl i've had it in my mind for a while but specifically last night I could not stop thinking about making a (maga)zine.

Like i was apart of my study association editorial team and i kinda loved it and I'd really like to work on something like that again. And now i'm just thinking of creating a fandom space zine where people could send in their fics or art or write think pieces or other articles or essays about fandom related stuff.

And i know it would be wayyy to much work and a logistical nightmare, and that's if anyone would even participate and/or be interested in reading it which i doubt, but i can't stop thinking about it because i just really want to *do something* like that again and urgggghh

#zine #rant #it might also be fun to have like editorial team meetings if people wanted to join in #come up with themes for issues #and help each other edit written work #can you see the vision #anyway its just an idea

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kittenintheden · 2 months ago

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House Rules

And now for something completely different, lol. Here’s a Nine-Fingers character study I did for the BG3 Women’s Wrongs zine (it’s not my zine piece, that will be something else).

Rating: Mature for canon-typical violence Word Count: 1700

AO3 link

***

Today will be a heavy day. Not a bad one, not a long one. Heavy. The unique sort of heavy that comes with defending one’s legacy.

Nine-Fingers Keene flexes the remaining fingers of her hands and glances down at the missing pinky on her left. It’s no matter. She has done what needs to be done before. She will do it again.

The one-eyed man who took her finger when she was but a girl continues to live out his days blind and fingerless himself, plagued by drug-induced nightmares. But she is not ungenerous. He is fed and housed as he suffers his elven lifespan’s worth of terrors.

She clenches her fist. No one takes from Nine-Fingers and walks away unscathed.

Contrary to popular belief, violence is not typically Astele’s first choice. Avoiding it is how she keeps the Gate’s criminal machine in motion, how she maintains her empire under the heel of the Fist and the Harpers. What’s a bit of dirty dealing so long as a leash is kept on violent crime? Indiscriminate murder is messy, it’s chaotic. It’s a weakness. Dead people can’t be properly extorted, after all.

Imagine the creeping roots of her rage lighting up when she digs up the culprit behind the recent spree of serial killings and arson throughout the Lower City.

Nine-Fingers keeps her eyes on her communications, sifting through the recent letters on her desk. Without looking up, she addresses her bodyguard.

“Ferrona,” she says, voice even.

“Saer?” comes the automatic response from the female dwarf at her side.

Nine-Fingers picks up a sheet of parchment and shifts it to another pile. “Fetch Laurel and Gilly. We’ve business to discuss.”

The dwarf nods her head in acknowledgement of her order and leaves the room.

When she’s alone, Nine-Fingers removes the hand crossbow she keeps strapped under her desk and lays it out in plain view. Then she opens a drawer to retrieve several bolts and a vial. She rolls the vial between her palms, stirring up the contents inside, and pulls the cork. Unhurriedly, she dips each bolt in turn and lays them out.

Moments later, Ferrona returns with the requested Guild members. A beautiful young tiefling wizard, ambitious and brilliant. A dark-skinned half-elf wrapped in black leather, hood and mask obscuring her face. Both members of the Lady’s Court, Nine-Fingers’ personal inner circle.

Astele rises from her seat and puts her hands behind her back as she comes around to meet her confidants. Her eyes pass over them and land on Ferrona. Nine-Fingers gives her a nod.

“You may leave us,” she says. “This is a sensitive matter.”

Ferrona’s jaw clenches as if her instinct is to argue, but she does not dare. Though her purpose is protecting her guildmaster to the death, her charge is no helpless figurehead. The guard has her order. She leaves, the door creaking shut behind her.

“Gilly, if you wouldn’t mind keeping out curious ears?” Nine-Fingers says, addressing the ranger.

The leather-clad woman traces a rune in the air, murmuring a spell that silences the area closest to the doors. As she does, Nine-Fingers picks up her crossbow and bolts from the table, casual and calm as can be. She loads a bolt and turns, taking aim for the humanoid target dummy in the corner.

“Another blaze in the Lower City last night,” Nine-Fingers says. She fires a bolt and it pierces squarely through the dummy’s head. “The Fist are sniffing around. Our people were able to move the body before they got there this time, but tensions are wearing thin.”

She fires another bolt and it lands right next to the first.

“I fear we may be looking at a raid soon,” she says as she loads a third bolt, turning back to the others. She raises her head to look at them. “Don’t suppose either of you have good news for me?”

Immediately, Gilly’s eyes narrow. They shift in Laurel’s direction.

Laurel, on the other hand, smiles brightly and speaks, her voice like trilling birdsong. “There’s been a new lead just this morning, I heard. A little Lightfoot halfling who fancies himself a vigilante has been targeting people currently paying dues to The Guild. Trying to cut off sources of our funding or reroute them to his own cause, if I were to guess.”

Nine-Fingers lets the hand crossbow dangle from her fingers at her side. “A good guess it is,” she says. “Funny thing, though. A Lightfoot halfling stopped by my office earlier, and my, did he have such a story to tell. He suspected his partner was about to betray him.”

The expression on Laurel’s pretty face has barely gone from confidence to realization when Nine-Fingers aims her weapon at the floor and fires a bolt directly through the tiefling’s foot. It pierces clean through her cloth shoe and embeds itself into the worn wooden floorboards underneath.

Realization turns to pain, but before it can turn to an incantation, Nine-Fingers shoves her bodily in the chest so she falls over backward directly into the edge of Gilly’s Silence spell. Without a word and needing no order, Gilly immediately draws her short sword and points it at Laurel’s throat, a clear warning should she try to move. A display of loyalty her leader knew to expect.

No emotion clouds Nine-Fingers’ face as she sets the crossbow on the desk and peers down at Laurel. She squats so they’re at eye level and gives a disappointed sigh.

“Every primary school-aged magical brat knows how to cast a fire bolt,” she says. “So you can imagine my frustration trying to narrow down exactly which wizard was aiding that halfling arsehole in finding folk who keep us on payroll. Thank you very much for confirming it. He’s out testing the poison traps now.”

From the floor, Laurel gesticulates, clearly attempting speech, but the spell steals her voice.

“You’re very clever,” Nine-Fingers continues. “But you’re not that clever. Your first mistake was assuming working your way onto my Court would make me complacent. Your second was stealing from me. Your third was making an absurd bloody spectacle of the whole ordeal because you like to watch things burn.”

Nine-Fingers leans in closer, right to the edge of the spell.

“The Gate does not burn unless I will it,” she whispers.

Laurel struggles to pull her foot from where it's pinned, but her movements turn sluggish, her blinks heavy. She attempts a somatic spell and her hands refuse to make the correct shapes before they collapse onto the floor at her sides. Nine-Fingers waits until all her muscles give up on her, leaving her lying helpless on her back with her eyes full of loathing.

Astele flicks her hand at Gilly. “Drop the spell.”

Gilly does, waving the magic away in an instant.

Nine-Fingers wraps her hand around the bolt stuck through Laurel’s foot and yanks it out, throwing it aside. Laurel gurgles, incapable of forming words.

“Paralytic poisons do come in handy, don’t they?” Nine-Fingers stands and walks around the immobile woman, taking another vial from her belt and shaking its violently pink contents. She shows it to Laurel. “You know what this is? Of course you do. In lieu of a proper interview, I think we’ll just have a poke around.”

The guildmaster uncorks the Potion of Mind-Reading and throws it back, pocketing the empty vial. She maintains eye contact with the traitor and invades her mind, the concoction amplifying her ability to pry apart anyone’s secrets. Laurel resists – and does a good job of it, too – but Nine-Fingers’ will is stronger. Always has been, always will be. She can allow for nothing else.

The tiefling’s memories are flame and chaos, hubris and cruelty. So bright, so pretty, so talented. She thought it would give her the entire world. She thought it would win her control of The Guild, in time.

Nine-Fingers tuts aloud. “A pity, honestly, that such a rising star should fall. But some youthful mistakes are permanent, aren’t they, pet?”

She snaps her wrist and a hand dagger slips into her palm from a hidden holster along her arm. Nine-Fingers twirls it once and points it at the woman. “Magic was never my strong suit, you know. Seems that it’s no longer yours, either.”

Beyond the door in the great hall, thieves and assassins perk up at the sound of strangled screams, their eyes roaming to their leader’s chamber. When the screams go quiet and the door opens, no one pretends they weren’t listening in. Nine-Fingers stands in the open doorframe, wiping bright red blood from her hands with a handkerchief. She cleans her blade and wraps it all in a neat little package.

When she moves forward toward the railing to address her crew below, she nods at Ferrona and tilts her head back to the room. The guard answers the call immediately and exits a moment later leading a tiefling wizard bound by hands burned down to the bone, blood streaming from her disfigured mouth. Laurel tries to spit, but she can only drool. The smell of burnt flesh fills the air.

“Do not treat her fingers,” Nine-Fingers says over her shoulder. “They will heal as they are. The Temple of Ilmater will find shelter for this poor victim of the latest shakedown and arson.”

She reaches the balcony and tosses the bloodied package over the side so it falls in the mud below. As she places her hands on the railing, she watches a group of Guild denizens fight over it. The victor raises the package in the air and unfolds it to show the bloody hand dagger and a miserable lump of flesh – a wizard’s tongue.

All eyes are on Nine-Fingers. She lets the silence stretch.

“I am in the market for a new wizard,” she calls, her voice echoing throughout the Guild Hall. “Feel free to put forth a name. A finder’s fee for a successful appointment. Any attempt at trickery will cost an eye.”

There are murmurings throughout the space, a low buzz of fear and awe.

Nine-Fingers turns and walks back to her office, rubbing her thumb over the stump of her left pinky. The weight of leadership is heavy, but she bears it by choice.

As she passes Gilly, she says, “Inform your Fist contact that the issue has been rectified. There will be no more fires.” The ranger nods and takes her leave, silent as shadow. Word will spread by nightfall.

Astele turns once more to admire the empire she’s built. Then she shuts her door.

No one upsets her Guild’s order and keeps their tongue.

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate #nine fingers keene #rogues doing rogue shit #kitten writes

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aikyudo · 2 months ago

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Aikyudo's Undertale Merch Master Post

Greetings! This is a master post I decided to make to keep better track of everyone I buy fandom merch from, since I keep acquiring more and more. This post will be pinned, and will contain links to the creator's Kofi/tumblr/twitter/ect accounts. A note, I am typically a very casual poster on tumblr, so I will try to mature warn on some photos. I will NOT post NSFW merch without censoring, but some art/merch could be risque in nature, but no genitals will be shown in photo.

My sewing desk as of 9/16/2024.

Plastic standees, keychains, and art prints by Sanny/BonesOnSkin

https://www.tumblr.com/bones-on-skin

https://x.com/bones_on_skin

https://ko-fi.com/bones_on_skin

Leviathantale enamel pins by Sirsen.

https://sirsen.tumblr.com/

https://ko-fi.com/sirsen

https://sirsen.storenvy.com

Error/Geno keychain, Nightmare/Passive!Nightmare keychain, Dream/Shatter keychain, Killer bracelet and Horror shaker charm by Jitters_Box.

https://ko-fi.com/jitters_box

https://x.com/JaybirdBox

Ink mug, Sans clip and small keychains by miraihere5.

https://x.com/miraiornot

https://www.tumblr.com/miraihere5

https://ko-fi.com/miraihere5

Undermeow plushies, keychains, and metal pins by WolfBeeStudio.

https://www.etsy.com/shop/WolfBeeStudio

https://wolfbeestudio.tumblr.com/

Ink and Error keychains by Hiro_Doodlez. The art piece hanging up was a Draw This In Your Style challenge of Hiro's that I took up right when I first joined the fandom. It was a lot of fun! It's entirely made up of fabric and was sewn together. I've always admired their art style, and I want to get more merch from them in the future.

https://ko-fi.com/hirodoodlez

https://x.com/Hiro_doodlez

https://hiro-doodlez.tumblr.com/

Depressive physical print comic by Pushtidarling/Manuru. I remember the preorder for this was back in October of 2023. I was in the fandom for maybe two months at that point, and had never read the comic before, and was only vaguely familiar with Ink and Error back then. I believe I am expecting some Depressive themed keychains from them sometime soon.

And wow, while checking back for Pushtidarling's links, it looks like they'll never sell physical copies of the book ever again due to the hassle of shipping. I totally understand, but it's also a shame, haha. I'd encourage them to try again, since I am on the consumer side and I know when people really love something they want to hold it in their hands. But then again... Shipping really is a hassle. Makes me feel even better to have a copy of it all to myself!

https://x.com/manuru_15

https://pushtidarlingcatalog.company.site

https://pushtidarling.tumblr.com/

And now it seems I have too many things! Additional posts with more merch photographed will be linked below:

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remidyal · 4 months ago

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Zine Jam 2024 bundle out!

The charity bundle is out for the 2024 zine jam and available at this link: Dimension 20 ZineJam 2024 Charity Bundle by whirling and 51 others - itch.io

I ran one zine this year and ended up contributing to four others! You can find my writing as well as my design, er, efforts at the Back of the Sheets zine, which is focused on class swap aus and includes some character sheet info for each entry!

As for the other zines I contributed to:

Friendship is the Blood of the Covenant is an Escape from the Bloodkeep zine; I contributed a piece on Efink pre-canon.

And Life Is a Nightmare is a zine focused on teenaged villains; I wrote an Aelwyn and Ragh centered piece.

Parallel Planes is a zine focused on AUs built around one particular thing in canon going differently. I contributed a piece built around what would have happened if instead of having the worst turn in dimension 20 history, Cody Walsh had crit with his wild-ass sword.

Finally, I've Been Here The Whole Time is a D20/Game Changer mashup zine; I did a Yes or No inspired piece.

I'll be posting these to AO3 individually daily, but you can read them all right now alongside quite literally hundreds of other great works of fanart and fanfiction through the link above in the individual zines!

#dimension 20 #fanfic #fanzine #d20 zine jam

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purplehairedwonder · 11 months ago

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2023 Fic Recap

This was quite a productive year for my writing! I contributed to multiple zines, continued working on my ongoing stories, and took part in several events. I wrote 157,450 words!

Here is a recap of my writing for the year:

One-Shots

One Piece

Gen Fic

"Summer Nights and Festival Lights" (PG | 1,200 words): On their trek across the North Blue, Rosinante and Law come across a town having a summer festival.

Written for the One Piece Summer Festival Zine.

"Heartfelt Welcome" (PG | 2,700 words): Jean Bart could see why the young captain was beloved by his men. He’d been on the man’s ship for less than a day and already felt a sense of loyalty toward him—and not just out of gratitude for freeing him. Yes, he was more thankful than he could ever put into words to Trafalgar Law for severing his collar, but it was the kindness and humanity he and his men had shown him since then that truly touched Jean Bart. He was quite aware of how rare such traits were among pirates.

Written for Heart Pirates Week 2023. Day 1 Prompts: Jean Bart and Scars

"Heart With Its Hands Full" (PG | 2,445 words): Shachi barely had time to register the blue dome spreading over him before he found himself face-down in a pile of snow several feet from where he had just been standing. He sat up, sputtering, while Law laughed. Shachi felt his own lips turning upward as he pushed himself to his feet; he liked the sound of Law’s laugh and wanted to hear it more. He was far more familiar with the sound of Law’s whimpers and gasps from nightmares, and if it took being the butt of a joke or two to get the kid to laugh, Shachi could handle that.

Written for Heart Pirates Week 2023. Day 2 Prompts: Shachi and Snow

"Restless Hearts" (PG | 2,568 words): "When I couldn’t sleep, I decided to come outside and just… see what it felt like. Being safe.”

“And? How does it feel?”

Law shook his head. “I don’t think I’m quite there yet.” He gave Penguin a wry look. “Besides, how safe can you feel when you’re on the way to take on an Emperor?”

It was not lost on Penguin, though, that Law seemed significantly less stressed on the way to Wano than he had before Punk Hazard. That, more than anything, was indicative of how Doflamingo had haunted Law. Still, Penguin hated the thought that Law, after finally putting his demons to rest, didn’t feel any measure of peace. If anyone deserved that, it was Law.

Written for Heart Pirates Week 2023. Day 3 Prompts: Penguin and Submarine

"A New Heart" (PG | 2,933 words): “What’s with those looks? You think I can’t do it because I’m a girl?”

Law rolled his eyes. “I don’t give a shit that you’re a girl,” he said. “I want to know what your angle is.” There was a small twitch in the girl’s eye, and Law knew he was on the right track. “Or maybe, more accurately, what’s your price?”

She glanced between the four of them before settling her eyes on Law. “I want to come with you when you leave.” Law raised an eyebrow. “I don’t want charity or nothing. I’m the best damn mechanic on this island. I’ll be your shipwright.”

Written for Heart Pirates Week 2023. Day 4 Prompts: Ikkaku and Repair

"Touch-Starved Heart" (PG | 2,464 words): Law was incredibly touch-starved. He had a limited tolerance for physical contact with other people, and he would remove himself—or someone else’s body parts—with his devil fruit if those limits were breached.

Yet the Hearts were an incredibly affectionate—and tactile—crew. Over the years, it had become something of a competition to see who could touch Law with affection the most frequently or for the longest without being dissected.

Clione first became aware of the competition about two weeks after joining the crew.

Written for Heart Pirates Week 2023. Day 5 Prompts: Clione and Touch

"Home Is Where the Hearts Are" (PG | 2,011 words): Law survives Dressrosa and comes home to the Heart Pirates.

Written for Heart Pirates Week 2023. Day 6 Prompt: Home

"Hearts Adrift" (PG | 3,163 words): Over the years, Law became Bepo’s compass, pointing him in the right direction. Bepo might be the navigator of the Heart Pirates, but Law was his North Star. Standing next to Law as the captain ordered the launching of the Polar Tang, watching their crewmates hustle about doing their duties to put the submarine in motion, had become home, and Bepo finally understood why Zepo had gone out to sea.

And that’s why it was so hard to watch Law’s form grow smaller and smaller as the Polar Tang sailed away from Punk Hazard. For the first time since Bepo had left Zou, he would be sailing without his trusted compass guiding him, his North Star keeping him on track.

Written for Heart Pirates Week 2023. Day 7 Prompts: Bepo and Lost

"Of Hearts and Broken Trust" (PG | 2,495 words): “I know it’s been tense on here the last few days, and that’s my fault.”

“It’s not—”

“Captain—”

Law raised a hand, cutting off the protests. “I get it. I left, and no one, not even me, knew when, or if, I’d be back. I put my own personal vendetta ahead of all of you, and you have every right to be angry with me.” He looked around the room. “I broke the trust you have in me as your captain, and for that I’m sorry. What we’re going to do in Wano… it’s going to take all of us trusting each other without reservation. So, I know it’s going to take a lot of work, but I intend to earn that trust back. And to start to repair the trust I’ve broken, I have to tell you why I left.”

Written for Heart Pirates Week 2023. Day 8 Prompts: Hakugan and Broken

"Heart Affords a Smile" (PG | 4,757 words): Contrary to popular belief, Trafalgar Law does smile. Sure, he’s more apt to smirk, and he doesn’t smile often or widely, but he does smile.

Or, five times Law smiled and one smile that inspired him.

Written for Heart Pirates Week 2023. Day 9 Prompts: Law and Smile

"Aftermath" (PG | 1,122 words): The aftermath of the fight at Winner Island.

"To Prove Worthy" ( PG-13 | 3,004 words): Drake met Sengoku’s gaze. “I want to become a Marine, like my father.”

“Your father, huh?” Sengoku murmured, his gaze going distant for a moment before he shook himself and focused back on Drake. “That’s a big decision to make, son, especially so soon after what you’ve experienced.”

But Drake was shaking his head before Sengoku finished speaking. “I’ve wanted this for my entire life. I’m more certain now than ever. Please, let me enlist.” Now that he’d started talking, the words wouldn’t stop tumbling out. “I know what my father was at the end, but he was once a good man. A good Marine. Let me honor that legacy.”

Or, after the events of Minion Island, a grieving Sengoku takes in the orphaned Drake.

Written for the Dark Waters One Piece Angst Zine.

"A Fall in the Woods" (PG | 1,497 words): While on their trek through the North Blue, Rosinante trips and sprains his ankle in the middle of the woods. It's a good thing he has a doctor as a companion.

Written for The Corazine.

Lawlu

"The Heart Is a Thing to Be Broken" (PG-13 | 5,514 words): The Straw Hats learn about Winner Island.

"Hold Fast to Dreams" (PG | 3,073 words): Law was nine the first time he had a dream that wasn’t his own. He was in a forest on an island he’d never seen before—the plants and trees were the wrong color for one thing—and he was running from an old man he called Gramps, only the man had looked nothing like either of Law’s grandfathers.

Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 1: Soulmates.

"A Fleeting Moment (When the Sun Can Kiss the Moon)" (PG-13 | 4,356 words): Once upon a time, the Sun fell in love with the Moon.

Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 2: Sun and Moon.

"The Heart Asks Pleasure - First" (PG-13 | 2,022 words): When Luffy was certain Law was looking at him, he said, “Take my heart.”

“What?” Law asked dumbly. There was no way he’d heard that correctly.

“Take my heart,” Luffy repeated, leaning forward. Though they were still a few feet apart on the balcony, Law suddenly felt like Luffy was looming over him. “And I’ll take yours.”

Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 3: Promise

"Hurricane Heat in My Head" (PG-13 | 2,916 words): Five times Luffy didn't like the way someone was looking at Law and one where he did something about it.

Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 4: Possessive

"Healing Hands and Healing Hearts" (PG | 1,488 words): Law might be a doctor, but Luffy, Law realized with a sudden flash of clarity, was a healer. Law had put Luffy physically back together after Marineford, but Luffy had put his own soul back together. And, two years later, he’d taken one look at Law’s pain and had extracted the poison from the wound that had been festering in Law’s soul for the last thirteen years.

Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 5: Healing

"My Heart in Your Hands, My Hands around Your Heart" (PG | 1,908 words): In Luffy's lowest moment, Law takes Luffy's hand and promises that his story will not end.

In Law's lowest moment, Luffy takes Law's hand and promises the same.

Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 6: Hand Holding

"Your Heart, Broken in My Chest" (PG-13 | 3,661 words): Luffy was far from an expert at having someone else’s heart in his chest, but he was pretty sure what was happening with Torao’s heart wasn’t normal.

Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 8: Hurt/Comfort

"My Heart, Fragile in Your Hands" (PG-13 | 2,380 words): “I failed them,” Law whispered, and it felt like a confession—like at church in Flevance. Confession was supposed to absolve someone of their sins, right? He doubted there was a god anywhere who could absolve him of his. And yet, he confessed at the altar of Luffy. “They were my responsibility, and I failed them.”

Or, Law wakes up in the Sunny's infirmary after Winner Island.

Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 9: Reunion.

"Our Hearts, Made Whole in Each Other" (PG-13 | 2,312 words): Luffy cupped Law’s cheek with his hand, softly grazing his thumb over a yellowing bruise. “Torao is so pretty,” he said quietly, a note of awe in his voice. Law flushed. “Torao’s heart is beating so fast.”

“Yeah,” Law agreed, swallowing. “It is.” Luffy’s, despite a few flutters, was beating steadily in Law’s chest. Law, on the other hand, felt pinned to the spot, one hand holding Kikoku and the other in Luffy’s grip.

“You should stay.”

Law blinked. “What?”

“You should stay,” Luffy repeated. “On the Sunny. With me."

Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 10: Confessions.

"Amid the Falling Snow" (PG-13 | 6,672 words): During a supply stop on the way to Zou, Luffy convinces Law to join him in looking for a local legend. But when their search is interrupted by a blizzard, they're forced to ride out the storm together.

Written for Truffyfest Secret Santa 2023

Dark Rise

"Remorse Is Memory Awake" (Will/James, Sarcean/Anharion | PG-13 | 1,740 words): Sloane’s head hadn’t even hit the ground before James was dropping to a knee, Ettore’s sword slipping from his grip. He screwed his eyes shut as image after image flew across his mind’s eye, overwhelming him, entrapping him in a whirlwind of sensation, every sense assaulted at once. He threw his hands over his ears as if he could block out the sudden onslaught, but it made no difference.

He gasped as he realized what he was seeing—not images. Memories.

Anharion’s memories.

His memories.

Multichaptered (Complete)

"To Call Myself Beloved" (Lawlu | PG-13 | 13,202 words): Betrothal Chase: A longstanding courting tradition between pirates in which a pirate who wants to marry another must catch the object of their desire.

Now Pirate King, Luffy declares that his next order of business is getting Law to marry him. Law drunkenly snaps that Luffy will need to catch him first, thus unwittingly setting a Betrothal Chase in motion. While Luffy is all-in, Law is, unsurprisingly, a bit of an idiot.

Written for Truffyfest 2023

WIP

"Hearts With(out) Chains" (Dubcon Doflaw, Eventual Lawlu | PG-13 | 24/? | 3,223 words written in 2023): Law is reclaimed by the Family when he’s 17 and, with Doflamingo holding the lives of his crew as collateral for his good behavior, eventually becomes the third Corazon. Years later, trapped by his impossible situation, Law finds a strange connection to Monkey D. Luffy, which offers a glimpse of something he’s repeatedly had ripped away from him: hope.

"(I Made My Mind) A Sunless Space" (Dubcon Doflaw, Eventual Lawlu | R | 13/? | 38,080 words written in 2023): In another life, Minion Island goes a bit differently: a gravely wounded Corazon is recovered by the Marines while Law is taken back into the Family. Years later, Rosinante teams up with Monkey D. Luffy to rescue Law from the clutches of his brother and set him free for good.

"From the Ashes" (Gen | PG-13 | 3/? | 10,811 words): Blackbeard takes Law and the defeated Heart Pirates captive after their defeat at Winner Island.

"The Night Is Darkening Round Me" (Lawlu | R | 5/? | 21,728 words): After Law purchases a house sight unseen, he starts experiencing things he can't explain: footsteps when he's alone, a coffee mug falling from the middle of the counter, flickering lights with no electrical issues. He's a skeptic, but his friends convince him to call in a group of paranormal investigators: the Straw Hat Paranormal Group.

Of course, nothing is ever what it seems, and Law is haunted by more than just spirits in his new house.

#Proud of how much writing I was able to do this year #Trafalgar Law #Monkey D. Luffy #Donquixote Rosinante #Donquixote Doflamingo #Shachi #Penguin #Best boi Bepo #Heart Pirates #Lawlu #One Piece #Dark Rise #James St. Clair #Will Kempen #St. Kempen #Caitlin's fic

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