#my oc is well..unhinged a bit

[losminerosinapatheticway]

Hmmmm

My chloe is in a bit of disaster. I would fix it..Idk when but I'd fix it (these two are quiet old)

[obsessivecelestial]

@stormbreaker-290 (and by extension @static-x3)

What if… Static never reciprocated Sirius’ adoration? What if Sirius went completely lovesick?

“So he plucked one of his eyes, just to wear the white veil.”

:3c

[vhaos-chaotic-writing]

eeeeek, Yandere Shockwave, Soundwave, Megatron TFP with Decepticon scientist y/n that have a personality like HAL 9000 or A.M hcs?

Oooh, interestiiing o(*￣▽￣*)o I've been meaning to search more about those two characters you mentioned, since I wanted to take them as side-inspiration characters for my OC Cycles - this will do good to make character study yes yes. But I'll say it in advance, I apologize if the personalities of the characters taken as references are not 100% accurate since I haven't read IHNMAIMS nor watched 2001: A Space Odyssey.

Yandere!TFP Megatron, Soundwave and Shockwave with a Cybertronian!Decepticon!Reader who is like HAL 9000/A.M (HCs)

WARNING: Yandere behaviour. Reader is Cybertronian, a scientist Decepticon with a personality already defined (HAL 9000 and A.M's personality) and gender neutral. A little bit of suggestive. Possibly one-sided love (can be read as Reader has no feelings for the bots).

MEGATRON

You had catched Megatron's attention the moment you had joined the Decepticons.

Deadly intelligent, logical thinking, a silent walking threat that, if you opened your mouth, could destroy anyone verbally... aaand, well, physically, you always fought with such dangerous elegance, aiming for the spark and making your enemies bleed, unbothered by the damage if it ever reached you.

Not like Megatron would let anyone place a servo on you. No, never.

The aggressive yandere with sadistic and possessive tendencies. And it was driving him mad just how you didn't crumble under his watch.

He wished to have you to actively reciprocate his love, to fully depend on him. He wanted to possess you.

But you were such a force that Megatron couldn't fully control - your intelligence, the deep hatred you held against the autobots (and, well, supposedly anyone that was alive) - oh, how addicting and how hurtful it was, it was destroying Megatron mentally but he craved for more.

He let's you do whatever you want and is not ashamed to show favoritism towards you over the others.

You tend to keep to yourself, the only emotions you ever show are either boredom, indifference, silent wrath and sooo many other emotions that are difficult to read. But the moment you show just a little, tiny, itty bitty other emotion towards Megatron, no matter if positive or negative, a single word or micro-expression. His spark clenches and buzzes, it wails and bleeds.

Whenever he gets to see you in battle, offline or torture a bot - he gets hot and bothered, and jealous.

He wants your hatred directed towards him, your silent need to hurt and torture, to draw energon and break frames to be directed towards him. Let your wrath be for him, taint him, please.

At some point, Megatron just breaks and becomes unhinged, possessive over you and nearly keeping you on an imaginary tight leash, but you defy him to keep working on your own experiments and just leave his side.

But you are not dumb, of course not. You know the power you hold over the Warlord, how he is quick to act as if a guardian dog that awaits for any type of praise or just a reaction from you.

"My angel of death" Megatron whispers, forcefully holding you close against his frame as he purrs.

"My Lord, I have important things to do." You say, nonchalantly and without a single hint of fear by shoving his faceplate away.

"Let me possess you. Let me love you." He begs, crazed smile and desperate.

"You are too loud for my liking, Lord Megatron, silence." And he shuts his mouth... for a while.

SOUNDWAVE

Soundwave fell first and hard, deep into a dark void in love with you.

From Soundwave's memories, the moment you and him met, you were like a divine being similar to Primus... or Unicron. There was no way you were an equal to him, you were higher than him, than Megatron, than anybot he has ever met!

The silent possessive with stalking yandere tendencies who always keeps his focus on you.

Has archives full of just you - photos, videos, voice records, notes, all the reports you've written and delivered, in and out of working hours... with you knowing or not.

Unlike with both Megatron and Shockwave, you actually don't mind Soundwave and find it quite pleasing to have him around. And while it is not explicitly telling him that you view him as a potential and worthy romantical partner, Soundwave clings passively to whatever attention you give him.

And he is content with just becoming your shadow - if that means he gets to be in your presence, hear you, see you, and Primus if you allow it, to feel you.

Only when you two are alone, he uses his real voice to speak with you. And only to speak praises and compliments, passive possessive remarks and a couple of lovesick sighs here and there.

Soundwave is fascinated by your intelligence and how you work, but also, gets all excited to see your anger show.

Soundwave feels his spark roar in passion at seeing you take the autobots in battle - a cold scientist back in the Nemesis and now a raged monster in battle.

"I HATE YOU!" You scream in burning agony and need to end lives.

To others it is the last words they will hear before either joining the All Spark or to meet unconsciousness (and extreme pain later once they awake), to Soundwave is like hearing the most beautiful symphony created by both Primus and Unicron.

Another precious clip to his collection!

Feels such a rush of energy whenever you call out on him without even looking at him whenever he is stalking you.

"Soundwave." You start outloud, to then snap your digits. "Here." You order.

The silent decepticon is quick to move, leaving his safe spot from the shadows to do as you ordered.

You don't stop working on your project, but once Soundwave kneels by your side, you use your closer servo to him and start petting and caressing his helm.

Yours forever, your personal walking shadow that will hold everything he can about you - the path of destruction you leave, for him, is the path towards where he must be: with you.

SHOCKWAVE

Unlike Megatron and Soundwave, Shockwave used to loathe you the very first moment he got to interact with you.

You were like a walking threat that could take his place among the Decepticon's ranks as the main scientist and to take his place under Megatron's favour.

Shockwave would develop a little obsession over you, at first to try and see any little detail that would make you inferior to him.

You couldn't be better than him. No.

With this, Shockwave slowly starts to develop a yandere personality: obsessive.

Not out of love, at first - but out of anger.

Shockwave would start to dig anywhere to find any type of information about you: who you are, where did you come from in Cybertron, what was your profession before the war, why did you join the Decepticons and where your loyalty truly fell, what type of researches and experiments have you done, and so on...

And as much as he wanted to deny it, it was illogical to lie: he started to become quite infatuated with you.

He learns and remembers everything about you, and then he realizes...

You were... like him.

Slowly, his little plan on finding everything about you to find a flaw, expose you and make Megatron cast you out of the Decepticons... started to take another turn.

The second yandere trait started to appear: delusion (kind of leaning on the self-indulgent type.)

You were brilliant, a genius, worthy to work along his side and that has clearly done great things for Megatron and the Decepticons. How you manage to keep such a cold, indifferent and calculating personality while deep down holding a burning, destructive hatred towards everything that surrounds you fascinates him.

Shockwave needed to study you.

And that's how the delusion begins.

No, he doesn't love you, he doesn't hold deep, strong feelings towards you. He just merely wishes to study you and learn more about you, that's it. You are just one of his little experiments.

... oh, such a liar.

Shockwave pretends to not notice his spark readings that get all crazy whenever his optic finds you or his audials pick up your voice. Pretends to not feel his whole frame shake whenever he gets to see you work on your own projects or speak facts. Pretends to not feel his legs weak when you praised him after showing off his working on Predaking.

"Fascinating, Shockwave." You say, staring up at the predacon. "... Only a brilliant processor would defy death."

Shockwave just hums back a small "I appreciate your words." - but you saw everything.

The way his servo clenched, how his voice box produced for a nano-klik a small sound out of surprise before speaking, how his frame tensed, the way his optic shined a little bit more.

He will keep his attention on you, lying to himself about doing it only in the name of science, failing to notice that you are watching him back and analyzing, thinking and calculating. And deep down, he wants it that way - for you to keep staring back at him and only him.

Aaahhh... My work is killing me. o(￣┰￣*)ゞ I hope y'all like it! I really hope I did it okay. Vhaos out!

[relic-seeker]

IT !!! ohh…. they are so beautiful, handsome, graceful :-)! you captured them wonderfully!!!

ATTACK AGAINST @relic-seeker

DUKE IS SO COOL LOOKING !! FUNKIEST VESSEL AROUND !!

[leidensygdom]

new scam just dropped

We know of the scammers that dwell on Discord, Twitter, or Bsky, and ask you to commission them, either giving you an AI generated picture or charging you 300$ and giving you something they commissioned on Fiverr for 5$ . I literally have a whole-ass guide on them. Then there's the ones who ask for commissions, trying to get you to draw their pet or whatever, then sending you a fake cheque or something, which has been very common on Tumblr. This post explains it well.

But now we're bringing the first type of scam (where someone tries to force you to commission them) onto tumblr! Our buddy miruuuwuu here is going to provide a really good example. Let's start with the circumstances this happened in. I got two DMs from this account, who had followed me few minutes prior to DMing. As always, I checked their profile first.

Few things to note in here that already told me this was a scammer: The account had a grand total of two posts in their profile, posted four hours ago. Nothing else. Completely empty account. The "femenine" name and the anime pfp already were kinda suspicious alongside this. A large portion of the "commission me" scammers will have a generic anime profile picture and a woman's name. The generic-ass description didn't help.

And well, since I haven't got this type of scammer on tumblr before, I decided to go along with it, because there's something inherently funny about some scammer trying this with someone who's specifically been doing guides about scammers for years. You will notice that my responses are rather mean, which... ngl I like being sassy about scammers what can I say

First initial impression: This person was trying very hard to try to be friends with me. Very weird from a complete random who just followed. The weirdest part here is, of course, how they instantly dismiss me saying "I'm not sure I think" about their random attempts to be like "you're my friend now" and simply proceed with their script. Now, this scammer is SLIGHTLY more specific than usual, since they mentioned DnD- which is closer to my interests than they tend to target. So uh, props to that I guess.

They inmediately tried to inquiry about my character. At this point, I know they'd be offering to draw them for money. I know these scammers tend to steal people's art as examples, so I just grabbed some shitty AI-generated tiefling from google. If they steal that and then try to use it as an example for someone else, I hope they can easily realize this is a scam. Notice how little they care about me being very rude and short-responsed: They're following a script. Afterwards, they sent me an example of "their OC". Alongside a massive AI-generated backstory that has no relation whatsoever to the character, which is supposedly a half elf.

I decide to poke a bit about it. Their response is pretty detached to someone who would actually know about RP or anything. "My setting's elves are green" would've been great. But nope, they immediately jump to trying to share me more examples of their art, and send me about 6-7 pictures in rapid fire. Some of them stolen, some of them traced, some of them commissioned from people in Fiverr for five bucks.

And then we jump immediately to the core of the scam: asking me to commission them. I already knew this was coming, but let's go for it. Their entire massive blurb on how they "work on paid and unpaid platforms" is extremely unhinged to read as an artist myself, but sure, whatever they wanna use to tell me why I gotta pay them. THE CRUCIAL PART HERE IS: YOU SHOULD NEVER COMMISSION PEOPLE WHO DMED YOU FIRST AT RANDOM! I have seen WAY too many people fall for this. If an "artist" DMs you to ask you to commission them, block them! Legitimate artists WON'T do that unprompted! I have way more information in the guide I linked in the first paragraph, but yeah.

At this point, these scams tend to go in different ways. If you insist you can't pay for them, they often will jump to guilt tripping you, or bringing some sob story on how they need money desperately. We had one in our Discord trying to convince two different people to commission them with entirely different stories (one of them was "I need to buy a gift for my wife" and the other one was "i need to buy hearing aids ASAP!!!"). DO NOT FALL FOR THESE SOB STORIES. They're just trying to get you to feel bad and agree even if you're suspicious.

This is the point where I just stopped going ahead with the conversation. They will try to haggle you. You tell them you have 100 bucks, they'll try to raise 150. A lot of artists online tend to have a pricing guide, a website, some sort of TOS kinda stuff. They won't try to see how much they can milk out of you by testing the waters. Again, please check out this guide if you're suspecting anything weird, or even feel free to DM me if you need someone to double check. Don't put your money on these scams: They will either run with your money, commission someone in the global south on fiverr for literal cents, or they'll just get you some AI generated mess.

Anyways, many thanks to miruuuwuu for helping me put together this post, very kind of them to let me know this scam is now coming on tumblr too!

[ozzgin]

Your recent post about your OCs wanting to yandere but [insert something preventing that here] makes me think of an idea 🤔

What if, what if, you have a bsf who's kinda like, into you, and you don't know it. The bsf is sorta yandere, but hides it so they don't freak you out, ykyk? 😏

But then like, you just casually mention one day that it'd be sorta romantic someone would stalk you and kill for you just 'cause "if someone cared for me that much they'd literally murder and stalk me to know everything about me and my tastes I'd be WOOED 😍🥰😫"

And the bsf just casually nods and goes, "well, I already do that for you bbg 😘😘 anything else you want me to do? ☺️"

And you go- "well, there's this annoying coworker-"

"say no more," your bsf says, shushing you with a newfound confidence now that he knows your type.

Does that sound a bit unhinged?

~ 🐇

(glad to hear you're doing well, ozzie!! <33 love yourself!)

Yandere!Best Friend would take his secret to the grave. Oh, he's so ashamed of his rotten self. Would you despise him if you knew about his dirty thoughts, his perversions, his intrusions? He would never dare confess to you, not after everything he's done.

Yandere!Best Friend has always been your biggest supporter and your biggest stalker. Wasn't it all too convenient that he'd readily pick you up within minutes from any location, almost as soon as you uttered the words? Wasn't there an eerie confidence in his voice when he'd reassure you that the poor soul who upset you would never come into your view again? Yet, there was never the faintest tinge of suspicion in your soul. His gentle smile remained as candid as ever.

"You've been stuck to your phone for days now," he jokes, somewhat annoyed by the lack of attention. What, have you found another boyfriend again? He's just gotten rid of the last one, and none of your messages hint that you'd be-

"Sorry, just reading a lot lately. I've really gotten into the yandere trope, you know? Something about an obsessive, creepy guy hits the spot."

You're sadly too preoccupied with your smut paragraphs to notice the borderline psychotic grin of your beloved friend. His heart drums with trepidation, and he places a hand over his heaving chest. God, he can barely contain himself. To hear these words coming out of your precious little mouth...his mind races at a dizzying speed, utterly overwhelmed. It takes a Herculean amount of willpower to refrain himself from pinning you to the ground in that very instant.

You won't be walking straight tomorrow.

[evilminji]

Know what's been haunting me? And my Yandere loving brain?

What if... an SI-OC? Fffffucked UP™?

Like? STRAIGHT up "....Oh No. I have? GRAVELY miscalculated."? Cause? And I'm probably wrong here, or forgetting nuisances, but? Dooku? Left the order and began his Fall? NOT because he disagreed with the vast majority of Jedi philosophy... but?

Because of what the Jedi had BECOME.

Senate attack dogs. Indentured servants. Following NOT the Force or their Orders Mandate, but a mere GOVERMANT. Politicians. Straight into ruin and slaughter no less! It was vile. Corrupt. A perversion and degradation of HIS beloved Jedi Order.

He was proud and filled with grief, isolated. Palpatine chose well.

But! He was ALSO a Master Jedi with DECADES of Mastery under his belt. You do not become that with out clear vision of what you want. Who you ARE. And Dooku? Very CLEARLY planned on winning. Killing Sidious and taking his place. An unfortunate necessity, really. In his Grand Plan™.

Too?

Start over, obviously.

Instead of just leaving and starting a NORMAL Religious Schism, building a temple on Serrano, and publicly calling his old Council members lil bitchs. Slap fighting in the town square, as is traditional. Maybe sending pass aggressive notes back and forth in the hands of increasingly spoiled Padawan, because OUR temple at least FEEDS these POOR WAIFS. Etc etc?

Dude went the SITH route. Of... you know... "kill everybody".

Bit extreme. Just saying.

However! Dooku? Not well! In fact, DEEPLY unhinged and masterfully hiding it! Because he is, in fact, a MASTER jedi! And know how to fucking DO THAT. So that slow creep of Deepyly Crazy? No one sees it. Gives ya time to miss the countdown to Boom, as it were.

Which leads to our dearly beloved SI. She? Is a well meaning IDIOT. She can't help it. It's the Force, man. All that feel good juice, clogging up her brain! Making her? Optimistic! Vaguely perky! Wanting to see the GOOD in people!!!

Disturbing, she knows. But it is what it is.

And MASTER Dooku? Feels? Stern but warm. Stalwart. Like one of those ancient trees or great temples in a quite moment. Old and powerful, not necessarily KIND, but certainly not UNKIND. Just... fussy, you know? Proper. Collected and self contained. Doesn't like messy and dirty and needless noise.

So... what's an itty bitty Crecheling to do? To stop this Respected Master from falling? Well... Yoda seems to think "babies" works? And SHE is Baby...

Better scrub down so I'm EXTRA not "why are all children so... sticky?" and make my self look as presentable as possible. Then? Plan: Stalk the Respected Master Dooku Like A Duckling is a GO~! Yoda finds this INSTANTLY hilarious. Starts feeding her insider information (One of his many, later Great Regrets).

Dooku likes THIS tea. Meditates in THIS garden. Ask him about THIS subject, no one listens to him rant about it, he'll enjoy lecturing you about it for HOURS. She actually learns quite a lot! Man's a good teacher. And SHE? Is a dutiful, polite, thoughtful, shining young paragon example of what he feels the Jedi SHOULD be.

She LISTENS. Unlike his foolish peers. She tries to better herself, day by day, instead of running around screaming and playing in mud. Asks after etiquette from the courts he's traveled too, so she does not offend in the future. Does not react with blind disgust to questions others would deem heretical!

Instead? SHE comes from a JEDI place of approach with compassion and consultation of the Force. What creates the most GOOD? How can we strive for the kindest, most ethical, most equal social possible? What brings the universe the most Light? Where do OUR duties end and the duties of OTHERS begin, and when is it time to call them on their failings, should there be any?

It is? Delightful~ if he were not already committed to his path, he would seriously consider taking her on as a Padawn. Like the Granddaughter he never had. In FACT? He is conflicted. While he does not wish to lose the bright little light he has become so accustomed too? He should probably do what is best for her.

He IS leaving after all. Eventually. Perhaps after Qui-Gon finally knights his own padawn. He can convince the man to come with him. A talk between them has been so very, very long overdue. And the man is like a son to him. Young Obi-Wan is a fine young Jedi. Upstanding and collected, could use a bit of tempering. Outrageous flirt. It would be hilarious.

It's a good plan.... right up until it isn't.

Until the Council's BLINDNESS lead his SON to dying alone. For Sidious little games. And the place in HIS chosen lineage is USURPED by some WHINY SAND COVERED BRAT who can not CONTROL himself! No. NO.

Absolutely Not.

As far as HE is concerned? HIS lineage? Goes him, Qui-gon, Obi-Wan, and then SI-OC. No Sand Brat. Is he spiraling? Oh yes. Has been for a while. But now? NOW someone just kicked out a major support beam. The building is a'shaking. SI-OC is worried. Knows this could make or break his Fall.

Doesn't realize that ship has sailed LONG before she arrived.

Jedi Master's do not Fall over night. It is the slow erosion that kills them. Death by ten thousand cuts. He was already thousands deep. Bleeding and bleeding, beyond her abilities to heal. Yoda could have changed things. He is a Master. But a mere Crecheling? An untrained child? No. She stood no chance.

Does not realize that, as she stands in the heart of the storm. The center of the bear trap. As composed Master Dooku grieves and rages, hair disheveled and robes a mess. No, he can not come to the comm right now. No, he is not taking visitors, thank you. Please, Master Dooku. Please! Drink some tea? Eat? Something. Anything. I beg you.

It is a focal point. An anchor to cling to, in that great Fall. As SI-OC fusses with blankets and music that might help, pressing her small and fragile light against his shields like a comforting weight. As though trying to protect him from the pain. As though ANYTHING could protect him.

Sits with him, in remembrance.

Comes with him, to the funeral.... where stands the sand brat. At HER Master's side. As though enough has not been stolen. How dare he? How dare THEY? To allow this!? Hatred festers. Rage. The mania that Darkness brings. He sees now. Ooooo ho ho, does he now see.

The Order has become Rotten. It cannot be saved. The Jedi have lost their way.

The old must be purged... and they must begin again.

It's all so CLEAR now. So simple. The path forward. Its so obvious now, HE is not leaving, oh no, THEY are leaving. It would be madness to leave a vulnerable Crecheling in such unfettered corruption. Exposed to the nonexistent mercies of Sidious and his ilk. Not to mention, Force knows what filth they'd attempt to stuff in her head behind his back!

Knight Kenobi is an adult. Can comport himself and defend his person. SI-OC can not. She is just a youngling. Should have BARELY been a padawn. But... things have changed.

SI-OC fall asleep, comfortable and certain she is perfectly safe, in MASTER Dooku's apartments. Just another Tea Time and obscure Force Philosophy lecture. Maybe some hands-on etiquette lessons. There are many, MANY different ways to take tea. And... man... the room is so cozy. Always so comfortable and tastefully inviting. Warm an... an snoozy... feelin... *thunk of a small child falling over, dead to the world*

Drugged? Sleep suggestion? Soothing bedtime tea? Yes. Yes, he did. She stood literally negative chances. He scoops up HIS granddaughter and leaves droids to pack the rest. Tucks her under his cloak. No one thinks to even check. Who would? He is trusted. Respected. It is well known how he dotes upon the child. Old age has softened him, some jest.

The dangers of attachment indeed. But it is not HIM who is in danger. It is HER who his attachment endangers. Because he can not let go. WILL NOT. Because it can crossed from caring to obsessive. Possessive. To mine, mine, mine.

Children are not property. Not toys or trophies. Teddy bears to squeeze until your hurt stops. They are living, breathing, entities in their own right. Which is something a JEDI would be able to accept. The SITH? No. No, see, his Great-grandpadawn is HIS. This is HIS family. HIS Jedi order. HIS plan to "fix" everything.

She done fucked up.

She wakes up on a ship to Serrano with COUNT Dooku.

His... his eyes turn Interesting Colors now. Ha ha... she is... staying Very Calm. It is REALLY important to stay VERY calm. No sudden movements. We Do Not startle the Darksider! Eeeeeeverones FRIENDS here! R-Right?

Oh of course. Nothing to be worried about, dear. You're just going to his Manor until the NEW temple is finished. (Neat. Terrifying. So, SO many horrifying parts of that sentence). And SI-OC? Pulls the good ol "never argue with the crazy person with a gun" technique. Smile and Nod! Mmmmhmmm! G-great! Can't wait!

(Oh god, help me)

War breaks out. She's on THE Separatist planet. But not? Before crazy grandpa? Has hired bounty hunters to find him force sensitive kids. You know, for the NEW Jedi order. Because we're all pretending here. Smile and nod, fellow hostages. For the love of the Force, smile and nod.

She's not entirely even certain half these children were from families that WANTED to give them up. It makes her sick to think about.

She still has to have Tea Time. Because she, a child, is the HEAD of the New Order. And he has decades of Jedi knowledge to impart. Also? Lonely and fixating. We're a happy family. Because I say so and have hostages. That's why you love you, don't you dear? *SI-OC with a wide, terrified hostage smile* mmmmhmm!

The Jedi? Have figured out what happened. Crecheling mysteriously disappeared at the same time a Count Dooku? They originally thought she tried to follow him. Got lost or grabbed by slavers. But now... NOW? Oh Force they know they horrifying truth. The Darksider stole a CHILD.

Everyone remembers SI-OC. She was the sweet little duckling. Well behaved and polite. A kind child. Worried for Count Dooku. And now look at what's happened?! The CIS is trotting out the "head" or their "new order" and it's their lost Crecheling. Now a teenager. Terror in her eyes and a fixed jedi smile.

The Creche Masters have to be physically dragged away from stealth ships. (They're just going to talk! They're jUST GOING TO TAL-!!!) Plo Koon is fucking HELPING and that's NOT helpful! No, your commander do NOT have "a point"! You can not do just a "little bit" of murder as "a treat"!

A certain Quinlan Vos? Never heard of him, of course, rocks up to this New Order with a smoothie. Has betrayed the OLD order and the Republic. Definitely for realisies and not because he's here to spy! Heeeeey, kiddo. How you holding up?

Answer? Oh THANK GOD, AN ADULT JEDI! Halp! Followed by gross sobbing. So... you know... not GREAT. Wouldn't recommend it.

But! The INTEL. Sweet holy shit, kid. Chips. Palpatine. Dooku behind the Clones. Everything ELSE she's quietly been noting down. Uuuuh, yeah. Yeah that WILL be... real useful.... Holy shit. No, seriously, give him a second. Just like that? Huh. Didn't even have to convince you. Wow. Okay.

Well then! Let's fuck over some Sith!

How the Shadows go about it? Probably very action movie and nail biting. High octane. Sweet big budget cgi effects. They get the De-chipped clones involved. Fox gets to finally, FINALLY shoot his boss. Never a happier man. He deserves it.

But that's not important. What IS? Is Quinlan Vos? Showing up to the Temple, with a burger and smelling strongly of smoke, and like.... over 450 force sensitive younglings, teenage and below. And probably a litter of tookas. Because what? Were they supposed to LEAVE them?

She takes One(1) step into the temple and gets hit with like? Three generations of Guilt Complexes. Man Pain. Yoda, Obi-Wan, AND Anikin? Mother FUCKER, you were 9! What were you supposed to DO? Bite him?! You literally JUST GOT HERE. *SI-OC has used Logic against Skywalker Guilt... it is not very effective!*

When? When will she be freeeeeeee? Cannon Yoda had the right idea.

She should go hide in a fucking SWAMP.

@babbling-babull @legitimatesatanspawn @spidori @lolottes @hypewinter @mayfay @hdgnj

[lemorgo]

did you know i love my oc

royal medieval au where danya is a part of royal family but has really bad health so doesnt have rights for the throne and lives somewhere really far away alone learning astronomy. svyat is royal alchemist that has to poison danya so he sure doesnt take the throne.

svyat was told about danya in a manner that made him seem like an old half rotten man and when he first saw danya he thought it's astronomer's maiden-helper. danya was also cursed by fairies in childhood to have bad health AND immortality because he said something unhinged to them

also svyat is werewolf? weredog? something were- and canine. most likely from and experiment or accident his parents made as alchemists and scientists themselves

svyat was supposed to poison danya and expected him to be somewhat evil but he appeared to be just a chill (and a bit weird too) when svyat arrived he like. immediately made danya sick with all of these new city bacteria lmao. and felt bad for poor feverish mf

i also like to imagine that they call danya " The Hare" bc he lives in a remote forest. also just look at the hares. fit perfectly. he never learned to mask his autism living in such solidarity so he doesn't have the usual " :3" that gives him rather bunny energy + is more physically fit because well. he lives alone in medieval times

[factual-fantasy]

25 Asks! Thanks y'all :}}🦍

I haven't gone into detail about what I've been battling for anonymity reasons, but there's not much to be said anyways.

Its basically "You don't have anything on this huge list so we're feeling like its probably this. Here's some stuff for you to do and see if it works."

So far I have not been cured. 💀

After reading through these, Cybertron and Beastwars peaked my interest :00 But I just don't think I could stomach the others. Especially not animated 😅

Thank you very much for these reviews tho! It was greatly appreciated!! :))

@mothpendragon

SCREMASS THANK YOU SO MUCH!! :DDDDD

And YEAHHHH LES GOO!!! Another Ratchet fan! :DDD I love Ratchet he's so grumpy and so full of love and care but he wont admit that🧡🧡🧡

@misscherrypie

(Spanish to English translation: I'd like another 45 tangerines)

XDD Yup! That's me for sure. I've wolfed down like 4 bags in the last few weeks! XDD 💞💀

(Referencing this post)

Thank you so much!!! :DDD And I do kind'a wish we saw more of a reaction from Optimus when he saw for himself that Raf was ok at least..

When Ratchet called to Optimus during his battle "Optimus.. we did it." (Referencing that they cured Raf) it didn't look like Optimus heard him.. which made me think that Optimus was going to be noticeably more tense/angry/panicked once he got his memory back. Because as far as he knew Raf was still dying, and that caused him to freak out earlier sooo...

I expected him to look distressed until he walked into the base and saw Raf and realized that he had been cured. Oh well 😔 I can say tho that Optimus immediately addressing Raf by name to make it clear he remembers him was a sweet touch 😌❤️

@gas-station-chip-dip

AAAAAAA THANK YOU!! :DD THAT MEAN A LOT!! :}}}💞💞💞

@1nksp1ll

:DDD THANK YOU!! :}}}}

@badlyblurry (Image is from this post)

HDJHBHBF THANKYIUUUU XDDD IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE HOW I DRAW HIM!!! :}}}}}}

@minnesotamedic186

I just made it up! :0

(Referencing this post)

Ooooo that's a good question. And I kiiind'a think I have an idea for it..?

I imagine that synthetic energon- (when fully completed and when not) is a green/turquoise color. I pictured that the process of making it artificially is what makes it off color. So what if any fluids that their body makes with synthetic energon is ALSO off color? Maybe instead of red tears they would be orange? Or yellow? Probably orange..

Now with dark energon.. I kind of imagined that all the fluids in a transformers body are replaced with dark energon due to its mythical/endlessly powerful nature. Instead of crying lubricant, Megatron just leaks dark energon.. 💀

ALSO SEHFSHEF THANUYOUU XDD

Ah sorry, but I have privated my TFP OC ref sheets. 😥

@imafrealinrainbow478484

Not doing so great today, hoping I feel better tomorrow 😔 Thank you tho! <:) I hope you're feeling better than I am! <XDD

@kaiserdarken

There would be chaos 💀

@artistiemi

HAPPY (late) MARIO DAY!! :DDD

What does this mean 💞💞

@neo-metalscottic

AAAA THANYUU SO MUCH!!! 😭😭💞💞💞

Now for the vehicons.. are they not actually clones? I always assumed they were.. If the canon suggests they aren't clones there's a loooot of rethinking I need to do 💀

(Link in ask)

I thought Tailgate was a bit chaotic I didn't know he was straight up unhinged-

(Takes notes for my tfp Tailgate👀)

(Link in ask)

Breakdown is/was a nurse? Is this canon.? I don't remember that.. I always thought he was just a generic soldier meant to counter the wrecker class :0

Its easy for me to draw through all the sickness and aching, because its my favorite thing to do and cheers me up a lot! :)

@candyglumboy

I've always kind'a liked Sonic. But I'm not sure how I'd dive into making comics for it.. There seems to be a lot of lore I need to catch up on.. 😞

Also I watched the 1st sonic movie and thought it was alright. I've played some odd sonic games here and there too! :)

@doodleclownbunny

AAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!! :DDD

And ooooo! :000 That's a fun Wally design! :)))

YES SIR MR.ANON SIR🫡🫡

@beryl-shade

Well... yes, I suppose it has! 😅

I will keep my eyes peeled for this 👁️👁️

@webbdiverr

Its like they always say, great minds think alike! XDDD

[wither-rose-aka-aria]

Stray Kids 9th member oc AU ✧{ Eryn }✧

✧About my oc/character✧

Name: Yu Xuān/ Kazuha Eguchi

Idol name: Eryn

Nicknames: Ryn, Zuha, Erie

Nicknames given to him by Stay or others: Unnie, Noona , Sharkie, shy bbg

Birthday and age: 2001/1/28 24 by the time this is posted

Mbti: Infp

Used to be in a boy group in hybe at 15 but left the group at 16 because of bullying,mistreatment by the company and false rumors

✧Place in the group✧

Position: dancer, rapper

Debuted as a rapper but was a vocalist in the previous group

Has a loud and sharp voice when rapping however his usual talking voice is a slight bit deeper & more breathy. A bit sultry & seductive I guess you could say. His talking voice is not even near Felix's deeper than the Pacific ahh voice

✧Good habits and strengths✧

A patient person

Neat and tidy

Good listener

Really good at cooking

Can be quite charming if he needs to be

Takes very good care of his hygene

Good at makeup & loves to dress up and style different outfits

✧Bad habits and weaknessess✧

Very shy

Has bad eating habits. Like he either forgets to eat lunch or dinner. He doesn't even eat breakfast

Over thinks too much

Has a hard time saying no to things

✧Appearance✧

Height: 183/6'1

Hair: black/straight/long

Eyes: dark grey

Very tanned skin. His skin looks like he's practically glowing despite having acne scars and other scars

Two very well-known features are his hooked nose, and the beauty mark on his lower lip

His features & voice have a very dark aesthetic but his personality is shy bbg

Is quite buff but not Changbin level buff

Has a lot of scars on his body from karate and other stuff. Mostly has burn marks and cuts,shallow or deep,clean or jagged. The most visible ones are the scars on his arms.

Has a lot of tattoos but the staff wasn't able to hide them pretty well because he's clumsy as hell and ended up revealing them in different ways lmao

Has a tattoo sleeve on his left arm, another type of tattoo on his right arm. A dragon back tattoo, a butterfly tattoo on his neck and a thigh and ankle tattoo

The most notable tattoo is the "STAY" tattoo on his knuckles and the "Stray Kids everywhere all around the world" tattoo on his hand.

✧other/socials✧

Used to have a TikTok account before his debut in Stray Kids

Has a Instagram account with an unhinged profile photo but makes very aesthetic posts

Skzoo: a purple shark(🦈 I couldn't find a purple one)

[moodymisty]

*awkward cough*

Mother, I crave luna wolves smut.

(this is my first time sending someone a request *internal panic* so bare with me)

(I'm thinking about the luna wolves bullying a surf fic that you did and now have brainrot.)

Like, imagine being my height (5'1) and having a big "mean" astartes fully aware that I'm sooo horny I'm loosing my mind.

And something about space marines that I can't stop thinking about is how they smell. Like the amount of testosterone.. Their sent has to be immensely horny inducing for a female.

Like- damn. Gigantic, absolutely shredded, smug ass smile and, teasing comments, absolute bastard of a super human. Asking you to do stuff that requires a lot more physical closeness than normal. Getting absolutely wrecked by the astartes smell(TM).

Eventually deciding to "help each other out" hot and heavy Make outs, grinding, humping, neck kisses and neck bites, the absolute WETness, SERIOUS man handling..

Jeez sorry I'm so down bad. Feel free to ignore me lol.

Big fan of your writing, hope you're doing well.

[ 𝕸𝖔𝖔𝖉𝖞𝕸𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖞'𝖘 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙 | 𝕬𝖔3 ]

Author's note: i am unhinged. Decided to make an actual Luna wolf oc for this one just cause. This idea is my fucking jam but for some reason I had a lot of trouble with this one, I think it's just because I'm getting a bit burnt out finishing the last of the requests. I hope you still enjoy.

Relationships: Artyom(Luna Wolf OC)/Fem!Reader

Warnings: Mild NSFW, Grinding, Groping, Some mild manhandling

“Careful.”

The Thunderhawk shakes as the air cools during its ascent, and Artyom puts a hand on your shoulder to steady you in your seat. You don’t have any risk for falling over, but he still does it anyways. You look up at him and give him a small nod in thanks.

The other refugees however are largely fending for themselves, grouped close together and muttering amongst themselves.

You don’t mind not being part of it. You barely know any of them; And throughout this entire ordeal, you've found yourself growing closer to Artyom than any of them. He doesn’t seem to mind, and if anything, seems to find it amusing. During the few times you’d see him wander through the base he’d always make a point to call you out, say hello before returning to his duties.

The other refugees found it odd. While Astartes are respected and admired, being in their attention isn’t seen as the most positive. They are mercurial and unpredictable on the best of days, intimating masses of muscle that can kill with ease; And enjoy doing so.

Artyom is an oddity among the Luna Wolves, to enjoy poking at a human. Even if it's only one, and he regains his stoic, almost sleepy expression when barking orders at any of the others.

Once the Thunderhawk docks into the landing bay of the battlebarge, everyone makes their way off. The Astartes leave silently other than an apothecary who ushers the refugees along to where they’ll stay before being placed. More than likely the first Imperium port they come across, where they'll become the Imperium Guard's logistical problem.

You move to follow along with them, assuming that will be your place, but Artyom grabs you before you have the chance. His hand claps your shoulder, nearly painfully heavy from the size and weight of his gauntlet.

“Come with me instead.”

You look up at him before following closely, halls rapidly becoming filled with only Astartes. They all look curiously at you, as if wondering what a baseline human is doing in this area. Clearly they're not used to them being here. You continue following Artyom anyways however and try to ignore the questioning gazes, until he pulls you inside a room filled with armoring equipment.

“Here. Hold this while I remove my armor.” He hands you his knife, while his bolter and rifle go on a rack made specifically for them. The knife clearly has more sentimental value, you assume.

“Why did you have me follow you?”

You say, holding the knife tight as machines slowly peel away plate after plate of ceramite. It's such an odd thing to see, watching him go slowly from a near machine in massive armor to something you would consider more human; Even if still very different.

“Those refugees are going into the serfs quarters until we pass by a human settled world. It will be a tight fit.”

The material of his black skinsuit is revealed bit by bit, until no armor remains. Your hands tighten around the handle of the large knife. The suit leaves nothing to the imagination as the name implies, stretching over his entire body other than his upper neck and face, and interface ports.

“So I won’t stay down there? Where will I sleep then?” You feel disrespectful for asking, you should be thankful his legion even bother to saved you. Artyom however seems to find no intentional disrespect, or at least doesn't point any out.

“You can stay in my quarters. Unless you would prefer the serfs.”

Slowly he starts to peel away his black skinsuit, revealing bare skin. The farther down it peels away- neck, collar bone, chest, hips- the farther down it drops the more you force your eyes to remain at strictly shoulder height and higher.

Once everything is removed, he pushes his shoulder blades together and they let out a crack, flexing his shoulders and chest. You swallow a knot in your throat, the knife being strangled in your hands.

“Hmm?”

Artyom hums, grabbing one of the sets of trousers and pulling them on. You shake your head and try to dispel thoughts you are sure would get you into an unspeakable amount of trouble away.

“Oh, nothing. I'm sorry.”

Now dressed you can worry less about your eyes wandering to places they shouldn't, but not completely; the waistline of his trousers exposing a good portion of his hips and lower stomach. You hope he didn't catch the way your eyes lingered on the v of his hips for a bit longer than they should have.

He walks closer, closer enough that you have to take a step back. He gives his neck a crack, and for a moment you wonder if the armor is that intensive on them; In it they never seem to mind, almost as if it's a second skin.

“Are you sure? Your heart is loud.”

He can hear it? You're throat tightens; You wonder what else he can hear. Can he hear your ragged breathing? The way your blood is thumping in your ears and downward between your legs.

“Oh, I just… A lot has happened. It's a lot to think about.” Artyom gives a gentle, sleepy smirk, and puts a hand on your shoulder.

“Do not worry. You are safe with me.”

Perhaps from physical dangers; but your mind is now a battleground between common sense and base instinct.

The way his shoulders make your body seem so frail, towering over you. The way his muscles stretch across his neck, his collarbone, the smooth taughtness of his stomach drifting into the v of his hips.

And perhaps he may not smell the nicest in first impression, there’s something underneath it that is oddly, not terrible. You find yourself swallowing a large knot in your throat as he looks down at you, his smirk shifting the taught skin of his facial scars. You skin feel like it's on fire, like you're boiling from the outside in, and you swear you've never felt this aroused in your entire life. The way you feel like your cunt has an actual heartbeat.

"You must still be quite unsettled, if your heart is still racing."

He steps closer, putting a hand on your shoulder; Though it's large enough that it pushes against the crook of your neck. He squeezes it just a bit, and you try to resist letting out an audible hitch in your breath.

"I'm fine, really. I thank you for your concern, though. It means a lot coming from you."

You feel like you're beginning to sweat, and your lower body feels tight and hot. You squeeze your thighs together subtly and instantly you can tell you're getting wet.

Artyom takes a step closer, and you didn't realize how close you were to the wall until your back presses against it and you're near entirely consumed in shadow. The armoring room is quite small, you can only assume because the battlebarge lacks the size of their larger ships.

"You are not a good liar," He says, his smile changing form. "I can smell you."

His hand moves from your shoulder to around your waist, easily able to cover a significant portion with how large it is.

"It took me a bit, to realize what that smell was whenever you were around me."

You don't suppose that's surprising; Being an astartes is surely a secluded fate, without much room for fraternizing. And the smell of someone being so aroused is probably unique and quite subtle, not an easily explainable thing.

He pulls your body forcing you to arch your back towards him, shoulders still against the wall. Your hands press against his body, and you can feel the overwhelming stuffy heat of his skin. He's nearly naked with only his trousers, yet he still feels like he has the body heat of a man who's just run for miles and miles.

His other hand also wraps around your waist, and you feel his fingers pushing up against the bottom of your chest.

It's bit awkward for him to lean down closer to you with his size, but it's easier when he forces his knee between your legs, rising you to your tiptoes. The feeling sends jolts of sensation right up your spine, and your cunt throbs. It's a intentional, painful act to not grind yourself against his thigh like you were desperate, no matter how in reality it was true.

"You're so small," He jokes, shadowing you. "Do you think you could even help me remove and put on my armor with those little hands of yours?"

His lips ghost over yours, the bow of his lip brushing against yours as he teases you. You can't help the way your hips twitch forward slightly, ever so subtly grinding against him as he moves in to kiss you. During so, his hands slide down from your waist to your hips, and forces you to push down on his thigh harder, as well as raising his knee up against the wall just a bit more to force your weight even more on him. His leg is still barely bent however; He could easily take your feet all the way off the ground if he wanted.

His hands grip your hips tightly and force you to grind against his thigh, causing you to moan and whimper. Your hands grip his own body weakly, leaning forward into him and pressing your face into his collarbone. You can feel the heat and hardness of his cock against your leg, and your cunt keeps tensing around a disappointing emptiness at the thought.

You want it so unbelievably bad. You would do just about anything for it. You don't care who hears or who sees, you just want him inside of you and you'll be more than willing to beg and plead and cry for it.

His lips pull away from yours, lips swollen and well kissed. You feel your spit mixed with your own against them.

"Be my personal serf. It'll be a far better life than whatever a refugee's will be, where ever you and your fellow humans end up."

You can't deny what he says is true. But the lust-driven cloud fogging your mind is more than a significant contributor to the 'yes' that you utter to him. It makes his smirk wider, and his eyes darker.

"Would I, still stay in your quarters?" His hands still grip your hips tightly as you speak breathlessly, trying to whimper and grind yourself against him further.

"There's serf's quarters right next my own I can requisition just for you." His lips move from your mouth to your neck, pressing against the pulse point just below your right ear.

"But if you'd rather stay in my own, I won't complain."

[lamentationsofalonelypotato]

Guess Who's Coming To Dinner?

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV, Soldier Boy POV

Summary: All you wanted was for Ben to have a nice Thanksgiving, but when your daughter brings her new boyfriend over, all hell brakes loose! This one-shot takes place in You Call It Madness But I Call It Love universe! Reader is described as "Curvy."

Tropes: Fluff, Awkward Situation Over The Holidays, Bringing A Boyfriend Home For The First Time.

Word Count: 9.1K

Warnings: I'm gonna label this 18+ just to be sure. There is some swearing, Heated Kiss (a few), Sexual Innuendo, Implied Sex, Flirting, References to Sex (it happens quite a bit), Ben loves his wife, Ben REALLY loves his wife. Soldier Boy being Soldier Boy (Everyone knows he’s a warning). SOFT Soldier Boy. Soldier Boy might be a little OC.

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person

A/N: Truthfully this is a lot of fluff and soft Ben, having a proper family Thanksgiving (well sort of). Really, just Ben showing how much he loves his wife... AND I had this completely unhinged idea forever ago, but everyone say thank you to @anna6307 for reminding me to write it. ❤️

You Call It Madness But I Call It Love Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Soldier Boy POV

Ben reaches out his arm to your side of the bed as he wakes up without opening his eyes, but his hand finds cold empty sheets instead of your soft warm body.

His eyes blink open, the light from the open windows at the foot of the bed brilliant as he looks out at the view of the backyard, seeing the peaks of the thick trees that point upwards to the sky and just a glimpse of the sea beyond, sparkling in the early morning light.

It was Thanksgiving, Ben's first since he came back from Russia and despite his numerous insistences that "it wasn't a big deal" you weren't listening to him.

Honestly, what was new? Ben thought to himself with a sigh.

Holidays for him were always bittersweet.

When he was a child and in his teen years he spent the holidays at the elegant parties your parents threw in your family home sneaking eggnog and sips of whiskey from the flask in his coat while the two of you avoided his plastered father, and while he was with you he had a good time, but it was the quiet that came when he went home to the cold shell of his father's house that left a chill behind.

Truthfully, Ben would have just stayed at the boarding schools during the holidays if he hadn't been so eager to get back to you. He liked going to your family's parties, liked standing next to you and taking the brunt of your mother's disapproving glances. When he wasn't there he knew that she turned those looks on you and knew that she was less likely to make a comment about how you looked when he was a worthy target, and he was more than happy to take it, if it meant that he would get to see you smile and enjoy yourself.

Ben didn't care much for holidays, hadn't since his mother died, but he knew how much you loved them and he knew that you had sacrificed that love for them when you came with him to become a supe.

Your mother had banned you from your home the minute you told her that you weren't going to marry Howard and that you were going with Ben, and despite your father's insistences, your mother refused to let you return for Thanksgiving and for Christmas. Which meant that you were left with nowhere to celebrate and nowhere to go for the holidays you loved so much.

Ben did everything he could to make sure that the two of you celebrated in your own way. The early Thanksgivings were spent eating turkey sandwiches in Central Park, while Ben tried his upmost to make you smile, but the later ones were spent at the lavish parties that Legend threw. And no matter how many women tried to pull Ben away from you, he stayed beside you making sure that you were having a good time, but even at those parties you never seemed as happy as you had when you were back home in Philadelphia or when it was just the two of you.

It always made a sick feeling settle in the pit of his stomach, because it made him believe that you regretted coming with him.

But today would be different.

It would be the first Thanksgiving that Ben had spent with you since he left. You told him that Rosemary, Lou, and you always spent the holidays in the house in Maine and Ben didn’t complain. He liked the house and he liked how happy you seemed there, how you seemed to leave any anxiety you had back in the city.

And despite all the other Thanksgivings the two of you had spent at Legend's blowouts soaked with booze, Ben saw that you were genuinely excited and happy this year to celebrate, and it made him feel like he'd done something right for once.

But of all the things that Ben had learned about you after he came back, the fact that you liked to cook and knew how was still astounding to him. Sure, he had some dated ideas about what women's roles were, but when you'd still been a supe with him in the past Ben hadn't seen you cook once. The only time you'd gone into the kitchen in the past was to make coffee.

And hearing that you were going to cook Thanksgiving dinner almost made Ben start to look for pigs flying around outside.

He and you had come to the house in the Maine countryside early to get everything set up while Rosemary, Lou, Ryan, and Rosemary's new boyfriend were coming today to stay for a week. Ryan's school didn't give him the full week off, and Rosemary's boyfriend was working up until Thanksgiving day.

Ben frowned when he thought about Rosemary bringing home a man with her for Thanksgiving. He already didn't like the thought that Rosemary was bringing some random guy around Lou that Ben didn't know anything about and despite Ben not being around for forty years, he didn’t like the thought of some creep dating his daughter. Ben might not have been a huge influence in Rosemary's life, but the thought that some asshole was just screwing around with her made Ben furious. He knew exactly what men wanted from women and like hell some dipshit was going to get it from his daughter.

When he told you that you'd kissed him on the cheek and told him that he was "being cute" and that Rosemary was old enough to make her own decisions. But at least you hadn't seemed too keen on meeting the guy either.

When Ben had asked you if you knew anything about Rosemary's boyfriend, you'd said that Rosemary hadn’t told you too much, wouldn't even tell you his name because she didn't want you to "stalk him" so all you knew was that he worked at Supe Affairs, and that he was nice. Lou had piped up and said that whoever this guy was brought by flowers for Rosie each time he showed up and always made sure to bring Lou a sunflower because he knew how much she liked them.

Ben had tried to get Lou to tell him who this guy was or at least what his name was by bargaining with ice cream, but Lou had refused, said that she "made her mommy a promise" and that she "wasn't a snitch." Ben was proud of her for holding her ground like that and took her out for ice cream, but it didn't make him any less frustrated when he tried to figure out who it was that Rosie was bringing here for Thanksgiving.

Ben was racking his mind trying to remember a moment that he would have seen her and her boyfriend together at work, but Ben hadn't seen Rosemary talking to anyone new at the office, just the team.

Not to mention, Ben didn't want to be trapped in the house with the guy, listening to him rail Ben's daughter. There were moments where Ben wished he didn't have supe hearing, and that certainly seemed like a moment he wouldn't want it.

Rosemary felt the same way of course. She also had supe hearing and had woken up in the middle of the night the last time she stayed with Ben and you at the Maine house and had witnessed something that she said was "grotesque." Personally, Ben was no longer embarrassed about that kind of thing, not to mention he liked how loud you were and how loud he could make you, but you certainly hadn't been able to look your daughter in the eye for a week when you realized exactly what she'd heard.

And then you had made the rule of no sex while Rosemary was around.

Ben hated that rule and it was difficult for him. He didn't like going too long without touching you, not to mention he liked it immensely when you touched him, so last night Ben had tried to get it all out of his system and give you a little bit of stress relief from all the meal prep and cleaning. He hated seeing you so stressed.

Of course the rule also meant that Ben could tease you as long as he wanted to. And that usually lead to you dragging him out to the car to run “errands,” when the two of you ended up parked a few miles away running errands in the front seat of his car.

The window was open, allowing the chill in the wind to creep through the opening, the leaves on the trees beyond were burnished gold, red, and orange, and Ben could hear the crashing of the waves along the rocky shore.

He enjoyed being here as much as you did. Walking along the shore holding your hand, barefoot while the waves lapped at his feet, sitting on the couch in the den with you in his lap listening to music, watching you paint in the screened in back porch that you'd turned into your studio while he read his newspaper, and falling asleep with his body curled protectively around yours pressing kisses into your bare shoulder as you drifted off with a soft smile, holding on tight to the arm that was wrapped around your waist. He didn't think that his life would ever look like this, sure he'd thought about what it would look like to be with you, but he didn't know how he'd gotten it and he wouldn't trade it for the world.

Ben turns his gaze to your side of the bed to confirm what he already knew, that you're not there and he sighed.

Ben didn't like waking up without you, he also hated going to sleep without you, but waking up in an empty bed only made him think of all the mornings that he spent away from you, the mornings when he was away on a film shoot and to remedy how much he missed you he called just to hear your voice, other mornings when he'd wake up to a cold bed after whoever he'd slept with had left, and other mornings from his youth where he was away at another boarding school and he missed the weight of your body next to his.

Usually as you slept, you would subconsciously curl into him, and he would wake up with you on his chest, your head over his heart, your left arm curved over his torso to hold him closer to you. He liked that, because even if you woke up before him you didn't move. Instead you would stay there, pressing a kiss over his heart, running your hand up to stroke his cheek, or push his hair back because you know how much he likes it. It was a nice way to wake up.

With you there, smiling at him, looking at him as if he's all you see, as if you can see through him, through bones and flesh into his soul. And you never look away no matter how much you see. You accept him as he is, all the parts that Ben worked so hard to hide from the rest of the world like his father taught him, the other parts that he isn't proud of, and yet you love him.

You'd worn many titles over the years. His best friend, his teammate, the woman he loves, and now his wife. And at every stage, every ascension to a new name place, Ben still didn't deserve you and everything you did for him.

He never had and he knew that he never will. He'd never met someone so happy to love him, so eager to give him all of you even after all the shit he'd done to you, and so excited to spend the rest of your life with him. Ben's eyes drop to the ring on his left hand and he smiles to himself. It had been three months since the two of you stood in front of a small group of people, you radiant in white and holding a bouquet of lavender listening to him make a promise to love you and protect you for as long as he lived and him listening to you promise the same thing. It was the one thing the two of you should have done ages ago, but all Ben cared about was that he had you, that he wasn't going to lose you ever again, and that you were his and wanted to be his for the rest of your life.

And he couldn't have been happier. Ben had never been this happy in his entire life and he knew that it had everything to do with you.

Funny, if someone had asked him in the past if he was happy he would have said yes without hesitation, but now he knew that he wasn't. This was happiness, being with you, spending the rest of his life making up for the past, making you smile, and feeling the unconditional love you had for him each day as you eased any worries he had about expressing too much, when he'd spent his life expressing the bare minimum of emotions that he usually locked away.

But waking up in bed without you made him unhappy.

He frowned and sat up, the blankets falling away from his bare chest with the movement as he looks around the room for signs that you were there, but the bathroom door stands ajar and the bedroom door is cracked open.

Ben focuses his hearing and hears you downstairs banging around in the kitchen. He sighs again.

How long has she been down there?

He thinks with a groan getting out of bed and trying to find his sweatpants. Ben wasn't sure where you'd thrown them when you ripped them off of him last night, but after he finds them halfway under the dresser he makes his way downstairs. His fingers run through his hair, brushing it back away from his face, his bare feet padding down the hardwood stairs.

The smell of turkey, fresh bread, cinnamon, and cloves wafted up the staircase and there was a warmth in the large open kitchen that came from the oven and from the wide open bay windows above the sink where the rising sun bathed the room in a honeyed glow. Ben could see you swaying to music where you stood at the sink, trying to wash some of dishes that were stacked high over the lip of the marble countertops.

You had flour smudged on your right cheekbone, and stuffing in your hair that was tied back from your face with a bandana and you were wearing one of his oversized shirts and the pair jeans that Ben loved on you, the ones that hugged your curves just the right way to drive him crazy.

Truthfully, Ben was happy that you were getting more comfortable wearing things that actually showed your curves again, especially after all the years you'd spent being swaddled in monstrosities of lace, choked by shape-wear, and stuffed into clothes only created to hide the curves that drove Ben mad whenever he saw them. Even in your years as a supe, you'd been hesitant to wear anything form fitting, still feeling the cold disapproval of your mother almost decades after she'd been put in the ground. If anything Ben liked how curvy you were, he liked that you had just a little more that he could hold on to and squeeze.

And like hell Ben was going to let his wife feel insecure in her own body, especially in one that made him feel like he was a damn teenager again whenever he got his hands on you.

There were remnants of potato peels, bundled plastic wrap, and tops of carrots scattered like fallen leaves over the kitchen island. Not one piece of countertop was spared by the destruction of your preparation for Thanksgiving, only sweeping chaos left behind in your wake.

Ben expected that. Your art studio back at the apartment was the same way, and whenever he teased you about it, you'd only roll your eyes at him and say that "there was no point in a creative space without having a little chaos."

The speaker in the kitchen is blasting one of your favorites, "You're All I Need To Get By" by Aretha Franklin. Ben personally didn't like her work, thought that she catered more to a feminine audience, but he knew how much you loved her. He had taken you to a private concert once for one of your birthdays, sat through the entire thing trying not to  grimace, but each time he almost did, he'd look over at you and see how happy you were and he'd smile instead.

You were singing it to yourself, swaying your hips along with the melody in a way that reminded Ben of exactly what you'd done with them last night.

He couldn't understand how he got so lucky and again he wondered how he ended up here with you.

Ben leaned against the doorway to watch for a few minutes, trying not to make a face when you'd screech. You were never the best singer in the world and Ben had been subject to your singing more than once in all the time he'd known you, more often on nights when the two of you would go out for drinks at the bar down the street from your childhood home in Philadelphia. You would belt songs as loud as you could on the drunken walk home, wobbling on your feet, while Ben tried his best to keep you walking in a straight line and keep you steady to avoid you falling on your face and busting your lip open on the curb.

He steps forward into the room, creeping up behind you, reaching out to grab you when-

"If you're trying to scare me that's not going to work." You say, scrubbing at one of the stainless steel bowls in your hand with a scrub brush.

Ben snorts and wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you back into his chest. You smelled like him again. "Didn't think you'd be able to hear me over the screeching."

"What screeching?"

"You trying to sing."

"I don't think you're exactly Frank Sinatra."

"Fuck, I miss that bastard. And the Rat Pack, we had some good times-"

"Yes. I remember something about you destroying a suite in Vegas and me sweet talking a cop to get you out of it." You hesitate, pulling your hands out from under the warm water. "Sinatra was quite the charmer, voice like velvet, not too bad looking and-"

"Just like me."

You laugh and lean back into his embrace, while Ben begins to sway you to the music. "I'm not too sure about that."

"Hmm." Ben sighs into your shoulder. "Why weren't you in bed when I woke up?"

"I'm sorry." You turn to kiss him on his bearded cheek, lingering for a minute longer in a way that makes Ben feel his heart thud an extra beat.

"What time did you get up?"

"5."

"Why the fuck have you been up for six hours?"

"Because I had to start cooking."

Ben can see the anxiety thrumming beneath your skin, settling over your shoulders, at the thought of how much you had to do. He didn't like it so he began to press his lips along the slope of your neck, feeling you sigh and relax in his arms as he pulls you closer against his body.

Fuck, you felt good.

You were always warm and soft in all the places that Ben was muscular and hard. You always fit so perfectly against him, in a way that made Ben refuse to believe that anyone else did. You were his in every possible way, had been his in every way since you were kids even if he was too afraid to admit it.

"I had to chop the carrots, boil the potatoes, make the pumpkin pie, stuff the turkey-" You continue with a sigh.

"You've been talking about stuffing that damn turkey for two days. Why don't you let me stuff something for a change?" Ben murmured, beginning to kiss down your throat, and moving his hands that were on your waist up under the oversized shirt you were wearing, trailing over your warm skin.

"You're a disgusting old man." You groan, but Ben can hear the smile in your voice without opening his eyes.

"You knew that when you married me Sweetheart." Ben smirks.

"Unfortunately."

"I think it's what you love most about me."

"No, I'm pretty sure it's how humble you are." You laugh at your joke and Ben squeezes you in response.

Ben moves his hand higher underneath your shirt stopping just below your bra, nibbling on your earlobe. "Come on Sweetheart, I want to have you one more time before Rosemary shows up."

"Ben-" You groan, your hands braced against the counter he'd pinned you against. "I can't I still have to-"

"By the time you finish arguing we could already be getting to the fun part."

You smirk at him over your shoulder. "Maybe I think the arguing is the fun part."

"Oh really?" Ben feels his smirk grow and this time he doesn't stop his hand from reaching past the edge of your bra and you gasp softly.

Ben couldn't get enough of the way you responded to him when he touched you, the sounds you made into his mouth when he made love to you, the little gasps, cries, and moans of his name that he replayed for himself whenever he was away on a mission and the ones he loved to recreate when he returned home to you. "Are you saying that you didn't have fun at all yesterday? Or last night?"

"No-" You say, trying to keep your voice even, but Ben can feel the tremor that courses through your body when the memory of what the two of you did comes roaring back.

"You're lying." He breathes into your throat. "You know I can tell when you lie."

"Ben really-"

Ben fits his lips over your mouth,  swallowing whatever excuse you were going to say whole. “As much as I like you in my clothes, I think it’s time you take this off.” He tugs at the bottom of your shirt.

"Ben I've still got to-" You try again, but this time Ben begins to suck a mark just under your jawline, next to the other one he left last night.

He liked doing that, as if the ring on your finger wasn't enough, Ben felt a primal urge to mark you so anyone who sees you knew that you were taken, and that you were his. He also knew that you liked it too. He could practically taste how much you wanted him against your lips, could feel it buzzing through your skin everywhere he was touching you. Ben loved that after all these years, he still had the same effect on you.

You sigh, reaching back to tangle your still wet hand in his hair. "You're fighting dirty." You say in a pout.

"By now you should know it’s the only way I know how sweetheart." Ben laughs against your skin, and he can feel your resolve begin to waver.

You groan again, tightening your hands in his hair and pushing your body back against his chest as his hands roam over the curves he loves so much.  "Fine." You mutter in utter defeat. "You get ten minutes, but if anything burns, Benjamin I swear I'm going to divorce you."

"I'd only convince you to marry me again doll." Ben chuckles. "And I only need 7."

*Exactly 27 minutes later*

Reader POV

"I'm going to get the divorce papers as soon as I take this turkey out of the oven! You said 7 minutes Benjamin!" You shout reaching for the oven mitts that you left haphazardly on the counter before Ben dragged you back to the bedroom.

Well, dragged is a relative term given how he carried you up the stairs with your mouth locked with his and your hands tangling in his hair.  And you might have complained about how long the two of you were upstairs, but you don't think that you would ever complain about anything Ben did to you.

You couldn't. Not when you still couldn't quite feel your legs and could feel your heartbeat thudding hard against your ribcage while you tried to catch your breath.

You take a step on shaky legs towards the oven, but Ben intercepts. "Let me do that doll." He gives you a knowing smirk that makes you weak in the knees. "Wouldn't want you to drop it."

"I hate you." You mutter under his breath when Ben reaches in to pull out the turkey, not bothering to put the over mitts on. You didn't need them either, but you liked using the oven mitts, they made you feel normal.

"I love you too sweetheart." He winks as he puts the turkey on top of the crowded stove. "Looks good."

"I love how surprised you are that I can cook."

"You weren't exactly Julia Child before I went to Russia." He says surveying the different foil covered dishes on top of the stove.

"I had to learn how to cook after I had Rosemary, toddlers get kinda hangry if you don't feed them, but Melanie helped. Taught me everything I know. I owe her so much." You smile at the memory of the older woman who welcomed you into her home when you felt so lost after Ben broke your heart and was taken to Russia. The woman who was more of a mother to you than your own flesh and blood. It was Melanie who brought you back from the darkness that threatened to consume you in the wake of what Ben had yelled at you at the premiere after you walked in on him and Countess.

Something that you no longer stung as much as it had. Ben had made it up to you, and despite how many times you told him not to feel guilty over what had happened, and that you had forgiven him, he refused to stop making it up to you everyday. And you'd never been so happy in your entire life.

"I do too." Ben murmurs pulling you close to him again and dragging his fingers over the plains of your face to push back your hair.

You knew that he still felt guilty for not being there when Rosemary was a kid, but you believed that the relationship that he was building with your daughter was making it better. Although it had a rocky start, Ben and Rosemary were getting along a lot better than they had been. You attributed that to how close they were working together, but you knew that Ben was becoming more optimistic about their relationship.

 "And why couldn't Rosemary help cook some of this shit? Why does it have to be just you?" Ben frowns.

“She’s bringing some things. I just didn’t want to make her bring too much because she’s got Ryan and Lou.”

“And that asshole.”

“We don’t know he’s an asshole.” You snort.

“He’s a guy.”

“You’re a guy, Ben.”

He frowns, and you couldn’t help but think that it was cute how protective he was acting. “So? He’s probably some pompous jerk.”

“It’s her life. And trust me, after everything that happened with Charlie, Rosemary is definitely making sure that  he’s not a creep.”

“But why won’t she tell us who the fuck he is?”

You press your lips together into a tight line. You’d also thought it was weird how close lipped Rosemary was being about the guy she’d been dating, but whenever you tried to bring him up she refused to talk about him. You didn’t understand why she was being so secretive, but the last time you'd asked her why she wouldn't tell you she said that she didn't want you to "scare him away."

Honestly, it's like she thinks I'm Ben or something. And I was nothing but supportive about Charlie and look what happened to him!

But you trusted her to make a good decision, figured that everything that happened with Charlie made her more wary about who she fell into bed with.

You fight the wave of nausea when you think about Rosemary having sex with her boyfriend.

Please let them not have sex in the house.

You think with a shudder.

The last thing you wanted to hear was Rosemary and her boyfriend having sex in the bedroom next to Ben and yours. It had been embarrassing enough when she heard Ben and you the last time, before you instituted the rule that Ben barely followed.

To be fair you hated that rule as much as he did.

 Of course, you knew they were sleeping together. Whenever she'd come home late from a date and practically floated into her apartment on nights Ben and you babysat, you could smell him all over her.

What was even weirder was that the smell was familiar, but you couldn’t place it.

But you liked seeing how happy she was, she deserved that after everything that happened with Charlie.

“I don’t know, she probably doesn’t want to say so you won’t show up and do whatever this is that you're doing." You reply.

"And what the fuck do you think I'm doing?"

You smile and pinch his cheek, making his frown deepen. "Being absolutely adorable."

"Don't call me that."

"Why not? You are. I love it that you're going full protective dad mode." You smile.

"Don't tempt me doll."

"Oh baby." Your smile turns more into a smirk, working your hands up his bare chest and feeling a groan vibrate through the palms of your hands. "We both know how much you love it."

Ben's eyes darken in a way that reminds you of exactly what the two of you had just been doing that almost resulted in the burning of the turkey.

You arch up to kiss him, but right before your lips touch his, you pull back. "Go get dressed. I'll be up in a bit to change before they get here-"

"I was going to wait for you to do that." Ben's eyes are still dark when you turn to the stove to find the meat thermometer.

"Why?" You ask leaning over the turkey to inspect it.

Ben pulls your body back into his. "Because I figure you're going to need a shower and I thought we might as well save some water."

"You're insatiable."

"Only for you sweetheart." Ben's lips press against your ear, the warmth of his breath making goosebumps skitter over your arms. "We both know how much you love it." He murmurs using your own words against you.

One of these days, he's going to make me spontaneously combust.

But you did love it. You loved every minute you spent with him, loved the way he looked at you, loved the way he touched you, and loved the way Ben made you feel loved. The way you imagined this life with Ben when you were younger, was nothing compared to the real thing.

"Give me thirty minutes." You whisper kissing him once more.

"I'll be waiting."

Reader POV

You fidget with the collar of the oversized black sweater, hoping that the edge is thick enough to cover the collection of marks on your neck that Ben left behind, while listening to the car come to a stop at the end of the long driveway outside the house.

Ben catches your hand to pull it away from the top of your sweater. "Why bother hiding it Sweetheart?" He purrs with a smirk, his dark hair still wet from the shower and hanging into green eyes that shine with mischief. Just as they did when you were kids, and even after all of these years, it still does the same thing to you. It still makes your heart beat an extra beat, still makes a warm tingle travel down your spine, and still makes your chest just a little tight.

"Because I'd like to not be covered in hickeys when I meet Rosemary's boyfriend for the first time."

He shrugs. "It's not like Rosemary doesn't know what we were doing before she showed up. He might as well learn early. And you never try to cover the marks you leave on me-"

"Because most of the ones I leave on you aren't as visible when you're wearing this many clothes." You roll your eyes, but give his hand a squeeze where it still holds yours. "And aren't I a little old to be having hickeys?"

"You're never too old for something like that doll." Ben leans down towards you, the mischief flickering into something else, morphing into the love that he'd shown you the minute he came back into your life. "Especially not when you keep me young."

"Well, you are older than me."

"Only by a few months."

"It makes all the difference. How does it feel to be old and rickety?"

Ben chuckles under his breath. "You didn't think I was old an rickety earlier."

The front door knob jiggles, stopping whatever you were going to respond with when Lou comes running into the room like a shot out of a cannon.

“Grandpa!” She crows and runs past you to leap into Ben’s arms.

As adorable as you thought it was how much that Lou loved Ben and how much Ben loved her, you couldn’t help but be a little bit jealous that Lou didn't say hi to you first. But the look on Ben's face when he hugs his granddaughter back makes all of that go away.

You remember how afraid you were to tell Ben about Lou and Rosemary, but each time you saw how genuinely happy Ben was to spend time with his granddaughter made your heart feel like it would burst. Because all you saw was the man you loved and the boy you grew up with. There wasn’t one shred of the persona Ben adopted as Soldier Boy and it made you love him more.

“Hey Louie.” Ben smiles picking up Lou so he’s not bending down. “How’s my favorite girl?”

“I missed you Ben!” Her little arms hug around his neck tight.

“Guess she didn’t miss me.” You mutter under your breath giving Ben a pointed look.

He only smirks at you over Lou’s shoulder.

“I missed you too grandma!” Lou says, her own supe hearing picking up what you whispered. “I just figured that Ben needs more hugs.”

“And why is that?” You laugh.

“Because you’ve been here longer and Ben has missed out on so many.” She reasons hugging Ben tighter.

The look in Ben's eyes when she says that shifts to something softer as he holds her close to him, hugging her back as tight as he dares. “Thank you honey.”

Ryan comes in next, holding a brown paper bag that must hold the sides that you asked Rosemary to bring with her, but she and her boyfriend still haven't made an appearance in the kitchen.

"Hey grandma. Happy Thanksgiving." Ryan smiles. "Where should I put this?"

"Just on the table is fine, but can I have a hug. I'm feeling a little left out." You joke throwing another glance at Ben and Lou.

Ryan hugs you half-heartedly. He was getting into his teen years, so things like hugs were always going to be a little awkward for a while, but you didn't care.

You liked that he was adjusting to his new life. He'd made a few friends at the school he attended, and Butcher would come by to make sure that Ryan was still doing his homework and to hang out with him.

You felt a little bad that Butcher would be spending Thanksgiving alone, you'd asked Ryan to invite him to come with them so Butcher could have a place to go, but Ryan had said that Butcher had "plans" and you'd missed the smile that Ryan hid when you turned away.

"Where's Rosemary?" You ask him when he pulls away.

"She's getting the bags."

"And you're not going to help her?" Ben raises an eyebrow at the teenager.

"But she's a supe-"

"That doesn't matter, go on." Ben nudges his head in the direction of the front door, a stern look on his face.

"But-"

"Don't argue with Ben." You say, gently pushing Ryan towards the door.

"Fine." Ryan mutters.

"I can help too Grandpa!" Lou cries, squirming so Ben knows that she wants to be put down.

"No sweetie." Ben puts her down, but she keeps a tight hold on his hand. "The only thing I want you to worry about is giving your grandma a hug."

Lou grabs on to you so tight that you're sure there's a bruise somewhere, but you don't care. You love your granddaughter even more than Ben, which was saying a lot, and Ben didn't need to know that.

I mean… he already knows.

"Happy Thanksgiving Grandma." Lou breathes.

"Happy Thanksgiving baby." You say, holding on to her.

You were happy to see your granddaughter, but you could feel the thrum of anxiety beneath your skin. You were a little nervous about meeting Rosemary's boyfriend. Maybe it was because you knew absolutely nothing about him, but for some reason it was making you more anxious than making a giant dinner for your entire family.

"Hey mom. Hey Ben. Happy Thanksgiving." Rosemary smiles at the two of you, holding a giant multicolored cornucopia of flowers. You'd told her that you wanted a centerpiece and despite being an artist for most of your life, Rosemary was better at merging together different flowers and textures to create truly awe-inspiring centerpieces.

You didn't know she did it, but each time she managed to surprise you with something that altered your brain chemistry.

"Happy Thanksgiving." You pull her in for a one armed hug. "Wow you've really outdone yourself with this one." Your eyes skate over the Sunflowers, red Daisies, orange Mums, and dark blue delphiniums in her other hand. There was a strong smell of cinnamon in the air, coming from the looped cinnamon sticks that she had woven in around the blooms.

"Thanks." She beams.

"Where's your boyfriend?" Ben asks, leaning against the counter. He'd be the picture of casual if you couldn't see the frown on his face, that he didn't even bother to hide.

"He's helping Ryan with the bags." She steps around you to move the centerpiece into the dining room, squeezing Ben on the arm as she walks past.

It makes you smile to yourself. Rosemary and Ben still had a long way to go before she was up for hugging him, but you could see that she was trying to get more used to him being around. You think that Ben marrying you helped. Not that Rosemary was old fashioned, but you think it solidified something in her head that Ben wasn't going anywhere and that he wasn't going to leave you again. You also think that Rosemary seeing the gentle way Ben was around Lou helped too, that Rosemary saw another side of him other than the side she'd seen in all those ridiculous movies, music videos, and pictures of Soldier Boy she'd seen growing up.

But you could also see the way it was making Ben feel better. When they first met he had been so discouraged by that way Rosemary treated him, but now when they spent time around one another you could see how happy Ben was and it warmed your heart.

You wanted Ben to feel like he belonged, it was his family too, not just yours. And every day you saw how Ben was starting to believe that more and more.

Ryan comes back into the room, loaded down with bags, but the man who comes in through the front door behind him isn't Rosemary's boyfriend, it's Billy Butcher.

He stops just inside the doorway, looking from you to Ben with an odd expression, as if he's not sure what to say.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Ben frowns at the man.

Ben barely tolerated Butcher, after missions he would come home and complain to you about something that Butcher ordered him to do. Personally you never thought that Butcher had Ben do anything that sounded like something Ben should complain about, but you knew that Ben had always had a problem following orders.

Weirder still was that Ben often said when he exploded on Butcher, it was Rosemary who would step in to try and calm Ben down. You didn't know why that was.

Honestly, you didn't hate Butcher, but you were wary of him. You thought he knew too much about your family and were often worried that he would sell all of you out for the right price. It did make you happy to see Ryan so happy with Butcher, but you weren't sure if you could trust him. He was one of the only people who knew what Lou could really do, one of the only people who knew what your power really was, and one of the only people who knew that Lou was the one who took down Homelander.

But at the same time you were happy that he was there. He was the closest connection that Ryan had to his mother, and you were glad that Ryan could have another person in his life who loved him. You'd seen what had happened with your own son and what happened to him when no one loved him. And you didn’t want that to happen to Ryan.

You elbow Ben hard in the stomach.

"What'd you do that for?" Ben asks.

Butcher clears his throat to say something, but you speak before he can.

"Please ignore Ben. I'm so glad you decided to join us. I was worried that you were just going to spend Thanksgiving holed up in your apartment. Ryan always talks about you when you're not here."

"Uh-" He clears his throat again and it's the first time that you’d ever heard him sound nervous.

You smile widely to make him feel more comfortable, taking his awkwardness as a reaction to what Ben said. "It's a good thing too, because I think I made way too much food."

"Right." Butcher clears his throat. "These are for you." He holds out a large bouquet of Lavender wrapped in crinkling brown paper towards you.

"Oh wow. Thanks." Surprise flits across your mind when you try to reason why Butcher brought you flowers, but you still take them. Ben seems to also consider this because, he frowns at the flowers as if he's debating whether or not to throw them away or if he should take it as a threat.

"Rose said they were your favorite." Butcher cracks an awkward smile.

The nickname makes you pause.

Rosemary hates it when anyone else other than us calls her by a nickname…

"And this is for you." Butcher holds out a bottle of whiskey towards Ben, who takes it, also confused by Butcher's sudden generosity.

"Thanks." Ben grunts, but he doesn't smile.

"You didn't have to bring us anything." You look down at the flowers, inhaling the fragrant blooms. "I mean, the invitation out here for Thanksgiving was not contingent upon gifts."

"I thought it was a good idea." Rosemary says, reentering the room with Lou following behind her. Butcher glances at her like a lifeline.

"Why?" You ask hesitantly.

A sick feeling begins to bubble in the pit of your stomach. You had a sneaking suspicion of where this was going, but you were still holding out for a miracle.

Ben looks past Butcher towards the front door of the house, looking for the boyfriend who was supposed to be getting the bags out of the car, but no one appears in the doorway. "How long does it take to get bags out of the car? Is your boyfriend hiding outside like a fucking pussy or something?"

Rosemary steps even closer to Butcher and this time she takes his hand.

Oh. My. Fuck.

"No. He's right here. Mom, Ben, You guys both know Will." She smiles up at him the same way that she used to smile at Charlie, when she was head over heels and nothing could drag her away. Her whole heart open and you can see the flicker of the same feeling reflected in Butcher's eyes when he glances at her.

It feels like all the air has been sucked out of the room, the awkward silence hanging over you all like a anvil choosing a target.

If Rosemary had come in here and announced that she was pregnant with an alien's baby you would have been less surprised than what she has just admitted. It was so far out in left field that you felt half-way to China. You had no idea how on earth this had happened or why it had happened.

There's a high pitched cracking noise, followed by an audible smash, as pieces of what was the whiskey bottle rain down from Ben's hand. He'd crushed the whole thing by just flexing his fingers.

"Surprise!" Lou grins ear to ear, swinging from Butcher's other hand, unable to read the room.

There's an awkward silence hovering over the room in the wake of their confession. Honestly, you're not sure what you’re feeling. Sure, you felt a little bit betrayed that Rosemary kept it from you for so long, but the feeling racing through your veins was unnamable.

"Lou go upstairs with Ryan." Ben growls in a low voice.

You had no idea how to respond to this. The only voice in your head was screaming "WHY HIM?"

Because really, why Billy Butcher?

"But-"

"Listen to Ben sweetie." You say in a tight voice, your eyes not leaving Butcher and Rosemary.

Rosemary's smile falters for a minute, as Lou goes up the stairs and no one speaks again until you hear her bedroom door close.

"No." Ben states calmly, wiping his hand with one of the dish towels.

"No, what?" Rosemary asks confused. She's still holding on to Butcher's hand, who looks as confused as she does.

"No. You're not allowed to date this British Fuck!" Ben shouts.

"Calm down mate-"

"Don't you dare tell me to calm down!" He takes a step forward and you hold out your arm to stop him. The heat of his skin is burning through his clothes where your arm makes contact with the front of his shirt. "And get your hands off my fucking daughter!"

"You cannot tell me what to do Ben! I am a grown woman and-"

"I don't give a single fuck. You're not going to date this Son of a Bitch." Ben's eyes narrow, pointing with one finger.

"And I don't give a single fuck what you say! I'm forty years old and you don't get to tell me who I can and cannot date." She shouts back.

"I am your father-"

"You're just the guy who got my mom pregnant!"

"Hey!" You shout interrupting the retort that is about to come out of Ben's mouth. "We're not going back to that."

"But he's being absolutely-"

"Rosemary." You clear your throat, interrupting her. "How long?"

"I don’t see why that matters-"

"How long?" You say again, interrupting her.

"Four months." Rosemary replies.

Butcher still looks like he's unsure what to do or what to say.

"Four months…" You nod methodically, and then you lose your last shred of composure. "Four MOTHER FUCKING MONTHS?!" You shout. "Are you insane?"

"Mom-"

You hold up a hand. "No. No. You had your chance. You've been sneaking around with William Fucking Butcher for four months! Why didn't you tell us?"

"Because I knew you would react like this."

"React completely justified to finding out that you're dating the guy who has killed countless people and tortured others to-"

"Look who's talking!" Rosemary spits.

Ben's body goes taunt next to you and you can practically feel the air heat with the force of his anger.

"Don't you turn this around on Ben!" You snap. "We're not discussing him right now. We're discussing you and him." You make a wild gesture at Butcher who looks even more uncomfortable now that you've started shouting.

Probably was just expecting Ben to freak out.

"I don't care-"

"Well that appears to be seen." You sigh heavily and pinch the bridge of your nose, trying very hard to make the images of Butcher and your daughter rolling around in bed together dissipate.

They weren't and there were so many.

"I can't believe that you did this. That you're-" You can't even get the words out of your mouth.

"Will you just listen to me for one fucking minute?!" Rosemary screams over you.

"Don't talk to your mother like that!" Ben seethes.

"And don’t you talk to Rose like that you arrogant wanker!" Butcher mirrors taking a step forward.

"That's it!" Ben tries to step around you, but you shift to intercept.

"You're not going to kill him in my kitchen." You say to Ben.

"Thank you-" Rosemary begins to say.

"Let's take him outside and kill him there." You continue.

"Good idea sweetheart. Less mess." Ben agrees.

"No!" Rosemary is now standing between Ben, you, and Butcher, shielding him from the two of you. "I love him and I'm not going to let you touch him!"

Her words make you freeze.

Sure, Butcher was hot and sexy in a rugged unwashed sort of way but you'd never believe that Rosemary had fallen in love with him. You weren't even sure that Butcher was capable of falling in love with anyone else after everything that happened with his wife and yet here he was standing in your house, in your kitchen, holding on to your daughter's hand, looking into your daughter's eyes as if he had fallen for her.

Since Charlie, Rosemary hadn't been on one date, hadn't spoken about anyone or made a comment about someone that she met at work. Before Charlie, Rosemary had only had a handful of dates. He was her one big love, the one that she fell head over heels for, the one who swept her off her feet, and then shattered her heart.

You had not once seen Rosemary look as happy as she did in the years since Charlie, except on nights that she spent coming home from a date with Butcher. You wanted her to be happy, you wanted her to find the same love that Ben and you shared, you wanted her to find someone who understood her completely the way that Ben understood you.

"Mom." Rosemary breathes. "You once told me that love shouldn't be a burden or something that I'm ashamed of. That it's not prideful or selfish, it's about giving pieces of yourself to someone else and receiving pieces of them so the two of you become something wonderful together." She sighs. "I spent months pushing Will away because I didn't want what happened to me before with Charlie to happen again. I-"

Butcher's hand finds hers when he senses how upset she is, and the motion makes your throat thick, but you let her keep talking.

"I thought that I was in love with Charlie, that he loved me, but I wasn't. And when Ben came back I struggled for a long time to understand why you let him back in after everything that happened, after he said those things and did those things to you. But then I fell in love with Will and I understood." She looks at Butcher with a half-smile. "I love him. And sure maybe he annoys the shit out of me and maybe he has the maturity of a teenage boy and-"

"You're not exactly making me feel better love." Butcher murmurs.

"And maybe he's not the most patient man in the world." She snorts with a shake of her head. "But I love every part of him, even the parts that make me want to throw him out the window. And I understand now why you couldn't let Ben go. Because I'm not going to let Will go. And if the two of you hate that, then it's too damn bad. Because he's not going anywhere."

"I'm not." Butcher re-affirms. "Even if the two of you throw me out I'm going to keep coming back."

"Like a damn cockroach." Ben murmurs under his breath. He'd drifted closer to you, so close that you could feel the warmth of his body against your back, a comfort right now.

"Exactly." Butcher flashes a shit eating grin.

You can’t help but respect him for that. His confidence in the face of certain death was admirable, and you could see some of the traits that Rosemary found so lovable. In fact, you could see a few of them in the man you loved with all your heart.

The four of you stand in complete silence listening to the what she just confessed, her words still ringing in the air of the warm kitchen.

"Mommy can we come down yet?!" Lou shouts from upstairs.

It breaks through the awkward tension and makes you smile.

"Fine." You say after a minute, extending your hand towards Butcher.

He takes it surprised, his other arm wrapped around your daughter's waist.

You yank him forward. "But if you break her heart, I'm going to make you wish you were never born. Understand?" You smile as widely as you can, with Ben glowering over your shoulder for effect.

"Yes ma'am."

When they go upstairs to put the bags away you sigh heavily and lean back against the counter, your head spinning. Ben is almost deathly silent, watching the two of them go, with an unreadable expression.

"What?" You ask him.

"Nothing." He shrugs, his dark hair falling forward into his face. "Just thinking of all the ways I can kill him if he breaks her heart."

"Good. We can make a list together and compare notes."

"And just when I think I can't love you anymore, you go ahead and say something like that."

"It’s a gift." You snort, placing your hand over Ben's heart and looking into his green eyes. "Well, I wanted your first Thanksgiving back to be memorable, but I didn't expect it to be like this."

"Honestly, I thought that it would end in a fight."

"The day is still young."

"It wouldn't be a normal day for us without a few surprises."

"I hate to admit it, but you're right."

"Always am."

"No you're always full of sh-"

Ben pulls you in for a kiss, his hands curving up over your hips, thumbs brushing beneath the hem of your shirt against your skin. "Happy Thanksgiving Sweetheart." He murmurs into your mouth.

"Happy Thanksgiving Ben."

A/N: Again, just a little holiday fluff from the fam!

Thank you so much for reading! Reblogs, Likes, and Comments, are not required, but are always appreciated! If you'd like to be added to the taglist for this series/universe, please let me know! 😊

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[deathmetalunicorn1]

Hiii! It's me :D

Anyways can I request a whitebeard pirates x fem child reader?

Reader is a clone of whitebeard having his haki and devil fruit ability (like the seraphims) basically reader is a little insane from being stuck in a lab

The reason why whitebeard has a clone because reader is a weapon for the Marines

Reader is a bit rude and a brat because she's scared of adults

Let's say back in marineford they tried forcing reader to fight back at whitebeard but whitebeard just scoop her up and took her back to the Moby dick (thatch, ace and whitebeard lives)

Reader has a brand on the back of her neck 'W. B CLONE' (whitebeard clone)

Reader also wear a pair of season earrings because she hated using her devil fruit abilities

So basically the whitebeard pirates are doing everything to get reader better because she suffered mental, emotional, and physical pain

(Can you also base reader of this? Reader is kinda base of my oc hehe)

Oh and reader has a sentient plush that listen to her commands and is mute

Don't forget to eat sleep and drink! Have a good day!

-Nobody knew why a child was on the battlefield at Marineford, one that looked like a little doll, holding a stuffed rabbit toy, dressed in a delicate looking dress with bows and lace.

-You were on the side of the marines, but you looked almost angry, like you were upset as the scientist beside you, your handler, shouted at you, “Attack them!!”

-The pirates were appalled, seeing a child soldier, one so young looking, being commanded.

-The scientist lifted his hand to strike you, to get you moving and the moment you flinched, Whitebeard’s giant fist slammed into his face, sending him flying.

-You could feel the pressure he was exerting, Haki from what you remembered as you were facing away from Whitebeard, seeing where the scientist landed, and Whitebeard saw the brand on the back of your neck.

-He had been hearing rumors that the government had been cloning strong pirates and marines, to create an unstoppable army. And this brand was something he had seen in the reports he had been receiving, realizing that you were a clone.

-You turned back, and you squeaked as he instantly scooped you up before leaping back to his ship, putting you safely on the figurehead, “Stay here. You’ll be safe.”

-You didn’t believe him, all your life, despite being so short, you had grown not to trust adults, they were the ones who beat you, who locked you up, starving you, forcing you to hurt others, and with it, your mind broke, becoming a bit unhinged.

-You did stay however, as you saw the scientists and marines who had been so mean to you, trying to get to the ship, telling you to come back to them.

-This was your chance to escape and finally be free!

-When Ace was freed and all pirates were retreating, you grabbed your rabbit, feeling a little scared as all the pirates made it back, including the giant man who grabbed you earlier.

-As you started to sail away, many were looking over at you, before you heard a sound, “Let’s go back Y/N~”

-You turned, seeing Kizaru there and your eyes went wide as you took a step back in slight fear, not wanting to go back to the lab, while the men behind you were ready to charge in.

-Kizaru ran for you, and you clenched your eyes shut, throwing a hand towards him in a slapping motion and instantly he hit a wall, being blown back, just like Whitebeard’s ability, making jaws drop as you sent Kizaru flying.

-Everyone turned to you, eyes wide in shock as you sniffled softly, tears trying to well in your eyes. You hated using your ability, if felt weird and it made you tired.

-Marco came over and you instantly bristled, “Stay back pineapple head!”

-Your sassy words stunned everyone as quickly everyone was roaring with laughter while Marco was trying not to be mad at you as he kneeled, “What is your name?”

-You immediately bit back, “What’s it to you?” okay… you were kind of a brat, but Whitebeard spoke next, “You don’t need to act like this any longer, you’re safe here.”

-You didn’t bite back to Whitebeard, who was looking down at you like you were a shy little rabbit, now knowing that you were his clone, as you had his abilities, and his white hair. You knew this as well, as you had seen him fighting, using the same ability you had.

-Whitebeard turned to all the others on the ship, “Everyone- this is my daughter and your new sister, Y/N!” the ship was quickly filled with cheers, and you felt weird, why were they so happy you were with them as you glared, “Who says I’m your daughter?”

-He ruffled your hair gently, surprising you as you were expecting to be hit, your eyes going wide, which some of them saw, making them curious, and angry, about what you had dealt with.

-Whitebeard just chuckled softly, seeing the front you were putting up, “I do- so let’s go on an adventure together!” You knew about adventures, reading about them in your picture books as tears quickly welled in your eyes.

-Ace came over with a teasing grin, “Aww is our little sister crying?” you instantly glared, holding your bunny up like you were going to beat him with it, “I’m not crying!” They just laughed, thinking you were cute.

-You still didn’t trust them yet, but so far, they were being nice to you and not hurting you. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to stay with them for a while.

[fokrons-art-hell]

The full local group for my iterator ocs, smiles and grins :]. Every single one of these losers has issues and problems.

From left to right: Reason for Faith (she/her gen2), Unyielding Iron Gates (he/she gen2), Endless Celebrations (they/them gen4), Nine Promises (they/them gen3), Chasing Light (he/him gen3), and Reflections on Rippling Water (he/they gen1)

More detail tidbits below the cut...

RFF: self proclaimed only 'normal one' of the group. introverted, snippy, sarcastic, but unfortunately does actually give a damn about the rest of her group. has a complex for not causing problems and being self-sufficient, which bites her in the ass later once the ancients are gone.

UIG: rule-stickler and responsibility-driven. Serious yet easily flustered. Volunteered to be acting group senior despite being the second oldest after RORW had a mental break. Gates often feels in over her head with tasks/responsbilities, but enjoys being helpful. Secondary purpose of his structure is his city was designed to house/train the ancient's military and manufacture/store munitions.

EC: youngest of the group. Structure was created for a similar secondary purpose to Nine Promises (as an entertainment/tourism hub) so Nine Promises serves as a mentor role to them. 9P and EC also were made by the same ancient. (EC was actually made to replace 9P for reasons but... neither of them know this initially </3). Excitable, fun-loving, and maybe a bit too forgiving, EC is a people-pleasing and easily pushed around

NP: my favorite freak who the whole plotline is central towards frankly. Cheery jokester of their local group, who has more of a cynical, grim side they tend to hide… drives the rule stickler, responsibility-driven acting senior of their group (Unyielding Iron Gates) crazy. as mentioned previously, NP's structure was designed to be a entertainment/tourism hub! they love parties + playing pranks + socializing with others, and get lonely quickly when nothing is going on... especially since ancients have been visiting their structure less and less of late... Tho NP's fickle and unhinged behavior tends to either charm or anger most other iterators, their stubborn cheer has held the local group through many hardships.

CL: was created as an emotional and structural support for RORW after RORW attempted self-sabotage and self-shut down of their own structure. Very perceptive of others emotions and generally anxiety-ridden himself. Quiet, compassionate, but with a sarcastic side that only occasionally leaps out. With the right topic, CL is very talkative.

RORW: ex-acting senior of the local group, and the eldest of the group. Was always rather disillusioned by the great problem, and as their bitterness towards their place and resentment for the ancients grew... had a mental break where they attempted self-shut-down. This was stopped by the ancients, who had invested waaaayyyy too many resources and individuals into RORW's structure+city to let him do that. post this event, pretty much demands whatever they want of the ancients to give them under threat of 'well I'm gonna KMS if u don't lol'. CL was built very close to RORW as a failsafe/secondary storage and as motivation for RORW not to self-sabotage, as doing so would also affect CL. RORW has a love for plants and fashion, and is a jokester to a lesser degree than NP, but definitely enjoys some drama/creating problems. Demeanor is sarcastic and grim with a great amount of morbid humour. RORW is generally extroverted, at least when it comes to other iterators, and is the type of guy who enjoys arguing for the sake of arguing.

[oldrainfall]

CW: None, just snippets of fluff plot bunnies, not a fic

Been working on characterization in my brain for the 141, and I’m once again, not normal™️ about it. :]

This is a long one folks. Like, super super long— might want to grab a snack/beverage first sort of long.

Please feel free to ask me to clarify anything, or chime in with your own thoughts/headcannons (HCs).

(I promise I don’t bite :> )

I am always looking to flesh out my understanding of the boys, and love adding little quirks and HCs about them much like a penguin that keeps on collecting rocks.

Love languages are a cheat sheet for me.

When you can pin down roundabouts what sort of affection would be most meaningful for a character, it helps you easily move on from there howabouts they’d act when in a romantic relationship (of course how the relationship between them beforehand matters a lot too in regards to the dynamic, but in the case of multi-shipping, or an x reader or what have you, it’s good to have some basic guidelines for how that character would behave).

In case you want to skip my mildly unhinged breakdown of the boys, here’s how I think they’d show affection, in brief. (Well, that and what ways they’d most appreciate receiving it.)

Starting with my favourite, and therefore the most easy for me to pin down, Soap.

Soap — Physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, and to a much lesser extent, quality time.

Ghost — Acts of service, quality time, words of affirmation (regular and a sort of modified version, I’ll explain later), and receiving gifts.

Price — Quality time, acts of service/receiving gifts, and to a lesser extent physical touch.

Gaz — Words of affirmation, physical touch, quality time, and acts of service.

Each section is broken up by a lil’ header— so feel free to skip around (though I do recommend reading Soap's before Gaz's, and Ghost's before Price's).

(Apologies in advance for any spelling errors. English is my first language, and I am not great at it... Probably didn't help that I literally wrote parts of this with my eyes closed because I was falling asleep while typing on my phone.)

Please enjoy. :>

Preamble/general writing advice/background for this/what-have-you

(Note: You can just scroll down to the next coloured text if you'd like to just jump right into the point of this post)

Okay so— keep in mind when you’re trying to figure out what your blorbos' (OCs, COD characters, self-insert, etc) love languages are, that their backstory, and how they act with other characters is a really good tell for they’d act in a romantic relationship. (Because showing affection to friends/loved ones/what-have-you is still them showing affection and usually transfers over to romantic relationship as well.)

Of course, you can run off of vibes if you want, no shade, I love that you feel so strongly for the characters you can just be like, ‘this applies to you now,’

I just personally like having lil’ guidelines, as it helps me keep my writing more consistent, and can help me better understand characters because to even make them I have to pick apart their brains.

Just keep in mind most people have more than one love language, often having a bit of a mix and match of what they like best. Applying this to your characters too can help make them feel more three dimensional.

(For example, I personally rather like all aspects of the love languages, and am fairly well rounded in that regard, though words of affirmation is a personal favourite, followed closely by gift giving.

Understanding how you yourself give/prefer to receive affection also helps you have a better grasp on how to apply them to your characters/characterizations.)

Now, before I explain my HCs for the boys, please keep in mind that I’m working with my understanding of the characters— which is a bit of a mishmash. I’m working with what I’ve gathered from the reboots when I played them, chunks I’ve bitten out of the wiki, fics I’ve read, and in the case of Soap & Ghost, but especially Ghost, things I’ve ripped from their backstories from the original games/media. (Namely the six comics for Ghost. I’ve only read them the once, so my understanding might be a bit spotty, but it should suffice for this I think.)

✨The Point✨

All of them would love acts of service, even Ghost and Price who would without a doubt huff and puff about someone doing something for their sake, though despite their fussing, they’d spend weeks afterwards thinking about it and doing their best to make it up to them (which could very easily escalate into an endless loop of each party trying to take care of the other).

They’re soldiers incredibly used to taking care of and doing things for themselves, of being strong and carrying everything on their shoulders without relying on anyone else.

Having someone put them first for once — when they’re so used to the mission being first, or putting the team before themself — means more to them then they could probably ever put into words, but damn it if they don’t do their best to give as good as they get. I’ll go more in depth about it for Ghost’s section (as it's applicable to him the most) but just keep in mind that doing something thoughtful for any of the 141 would make them melt (at least a little).

Originally I was going to put this as one long mega post but I ended up writing so much that I feel like it works better in easier to digest sections. So.

Soap's section. — Is here

Ghost's Section. — Is here

Price's Section. — Is here

Gaz's Section. — Is here

Bby's first multi-link post, love that for me.

But also, dear god this got away from me.

This took me forever to do up.

It was just supposed to be a silly little break down.

I started this yesterday morning, and kept working on it instead of doing things i probably should've been doing.

Uhhhh. Hope you enjoyed this anyway though.

... Should I do a follow up nsfw ver?

I'm kinda thinking about it; but I also have like, actual oneshots I could be workin' on too, y'know? Kinda wanna take a lil' break from this and keep on with those, I have a poly!retired!hybrid!141 x hybrid!reader farm life au I've been picking away at, a poly!141 x reader oneshot with Soap in a kilt, and a short (by my standards) fluff Soap x Reader thing

We'll just have to see what I get possessed by next I guess, lmao

Also, feel free to request anything from this to become a full-fledged oneshot, if you'd like

Have a good day/evening/night y'all :>

... Do I have enough content to justify making a masterlist now, or..?

Edit: I did it anyway

✨My Masterlist✨

[pampanope]

7-11 Gameplay voice-lines based on @kings-out-of-pocket-hell ‘s post~

7-11 lore bite i guess???

(it’s such a fun ideaaa and I think everyone should give it a try with their oc :))))

Warning for language and unhinged behavior ✨

Match Start

“Don’t be reckless.”

“Happy hunting~””

“Let’s sweep ‘em.”

“If you see any Konni, they’re mine.”

Throwing Lethal

“Using lethal.”

(Throwable explosive) “FIRE IN THE HOLE!”

(Throwable explosive) “Sending hot potato.”

(Molotov) “Drink up.”

(Throwing knife/axe) “Always wanted live target practice…”

(Throwing knife/axe) “Ha! Nailed it.”

(Throwing Thermal grenade) “Deploying war crime.”

(Tossing C4) “Deploying explosive brick.”

Using Tactical

(Concussive & Flash) “Bang, baby.”

(Concussive & Flash) “Throwing Tactical!”

(Stim shot) “GRRRRRRRRRRR.”

(Smoke Grenade) “Ninja vanish…”

Friendly Fire

“‘EY, I’M WALKING HERE.”

“I’m gonna drag your ass to the shooting range if you keep that up.”

“Try that again, and I’ll show you friendly.”

“Oh, YOU WANNA GO?!”

Eliminating enemy

“Target down.”

“Enemy eliminated.”

(With a launcher) giggling “I GOT ROCKETS.”

(With a knife) “Careful. I bite~

(With a knife) “The knife was getting thirsty.”

(With a bat) “Wraith, that was for you.”

(With a sniper rifle) “Karma strikes again.”

(With a sniper rifle) “Smoked.”

Downed

“Cough Nope. Still not going to medical.”

“Dammit, they clipped me.”

“Need to…hang on…”

Reviving

“Get up, this isn’t the end.”

“You’ll be okay.”

(Azzy) “C’mon, still got some asses to kick.”

(Pixel) “I got you, kid.”

(Lock) “Let’s make those rats pay.”

(Wolf) “You’re alright, pup.”

(Sentinel) “Got some assholes to disappear.”

(Graves) “Still need you, sir.”

(Emile) “I’ll always pick you up.”

(Emile) “I’m here, Sweetheart.”

Surviving enemy fire

“HAH! DO BETTER!”

“Well that gun’s wasted on you.”

“Oh, you’re getting bit, asshole.”

“I ain’t gonna be Swiss cheese, dammit.”

Laughs “You’re softer than my plush.”

Killstreak rewards

(Dreadnought) “Summoning Cupcake.”

(Chopper Gunner) “Cut ‘em down, buddy.”

(RC XD) “Man, I hate using these.”

(Napalm strike) “Now where’s their spawn point…”

(Sentry Turret) “I’ll name it Shooty McShootface.”

(Watchdog Helo) “Scary dog privilege~”

(Care package) “I hope they sent snacks.”

Using Field upgrade

(Spring mine) “I hope they’re not too attached to their legs…”

(Spring mine) “Do they need legs? Naaah…”

(Assault pack) “I brought food~”

(Acoustic Amp) “Time to go hunting.”

(War Cry) howls like a wolf

(Sleeper agent) “Time to use what Emile taught me.”

(Sleeper agent) Hums Perry the Platypus theme

Misc.

(Vs enemy with riot shield) “You should be embarrassed.”

(Killing sleeper agent) “I’ve seen better. And you’re not as pretty.”

(Throwing grenade back) “You DROPPED THIS.”

(Capturing objective) “Mine.”

(Becoming HVT) “I’m neither high nor am I valuable.”

(Becoming HVT) “Oh god, please no.”

(Emile becoming HVT) “Stay behind me, Emmy.”

(Sees Emile go down) “NOOO!! EMILE!”

(Planting bomb on S&D) “Adding a bit of spice.”

(Catching fire) “OW OW OW.”

(Revenge kill) “Yeah, fuck you, too.”

(Revenge kill) “Payback’s sweet.”

(Hiding near Emile in Prop Hunt) “Damn. We look good.”

Victory

“Outstanding shit.”

“And that’s how it’s done.”

Defeat

“Tch. Dammit.”

“Retreat! For now.”