#my mom now is a
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clearlyacollectortragedy · 3 months ago
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Hey, how’s everyone doing? So here I am again, like a year later since my last post, because I just need to vent before I lose my mind.
So, the thing is, I was watching 9-1-1 again for like the millionth time, and just so happens that my mom walked by and got curious about what I was watching, so naturally, like the very noisy mom that I have, she decided to sit down and join me. And of course, the episode I was watching just so happened to be the lawsuit one where Eddie and Buck are fighting (iykyk), I don’t remember the exact episode number, but you get the idea.
Anyway, my beautiful yet very old fashioned mother looks directly into my soul with this very serious expression and goes, 'Are you watching a gay show?' Now, my mom isn't homophobic but feels a bit uncomfortable about queernes and all of that, she's kinda having a hard time accepting people but she's not against it, although she's trying her best. So, you can imagine I was shitting my pants a little bit with that one when she came out with that. I was like, 'Uh, yes… but also no?' Then I asked why she thought that, and with a very 'Are you shitting me' look she says, and I quote, 'They’re married, like, they’re literally fighting over custody, right? Talking about lawyers and all that. I did this with your dad so you can't tell me they’re not... Homosexual or whatever you call it these days.'
So yeah... All I did was laugh like a maniac and managed to explain her the situation (sort of) and even showed her bits from other episodes to give her the full picture of Buck and Eddie’s dynamic. And I kid you not, just when I was showing her The kitchen scene™ my sister walked in and got somehow involved, a minute into the conversation she tells me 'Michelle what the fuck are you talking about, those two have to be fucking, look how the guy with the beer is looking at that other dude, is like that meme with the cat and the cookie.' Like I'm not the one who is obsessed with the show, anyways my mom later agreed and in disbelief told me that they've had to fucked at least once. At this point, I was on the floor, either crying from laughter or pure shock because here’s my 'I'm very uncomfortable about gays' mother telling me that the way those two looked at each other was with, and I qoute again: 'Very sex deprived eyes.'
So, to wrap this stupid and totally unnecessary post I’ve come to two conclusions:
1.- My mom may no longer be in the "I'm not homophobic I just don't really like when two boys or girls kiss each other" category because, after all that, she literally started rooting for those two to not only kiss but fuck each other. So... Thanks 9-1-1 I guess?
2.- And two, if MY mom is now convinced that those two Need to be together, or more like belong together in words of my sister, so can ABC. So if Buddie doesn't become canon these season I will personally go down to the ABC studios and force them to make it happen.
That’s all folks, thanks for letting me rant, because I was about to lose it. Have a lovely afternoon or night or whatever you're having. And if you’ve got someone who may be homophobic or is uncomfortable with queerness, maybe tell them about Buck and Eddie. It did worked for my mom after all.
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fairydrowning · 6 months ago
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– Noor Unnahar, Instagram account "noor_unnahar"
[TEXT ID: / [Lemons] / My father's mother loved lemons. Years after her passing, / we run out of everything, but never / lemons. / Nothing else shelters grief / better than memory. / It's my father way of saying, / even in your absence, you will be / cared by me. / END ID]
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moniquill · 7 months ago
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One of the socialist things I’d like to see ALONG WITH UBI (not instead of) is a government option for all basic neccesities. I am aware that the government option would -suck- and as long as it’s survivably functional, I’m fine with that. When I was a kid, we got monthly commodity food boxes. They’d be filled with food that looked like this:
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And in lean months, it would be that and whatever we could get from the garden, or forage/fish, or trade with friends and neighbors. My mom had this awesome recipe for peanut butter balls that utilized the powdered milk, shit-quality peanut butter, and maple-flavored corn syrup that we routinely got in our box and actually made it good. 
I think that these things should be available for purchase at every supermarket, and that the prices should be fixed with relation to the minimum wage. All brands should have to compete with the government option - if SPAM is going to be more expensive than LUNCHEON MEAT in the silver can, then it needs to justify that cost by being better quality.
I want the same thing for housing. I want fucking Commie Blocks to be an option.
This would combat runaway inflation by putting a price cap on survival needs. It would guard against shrinkflation, because a consumers could compare the Government Standard portion to the brands. UBI ought to be such that it covers The Government Option for food, housing, clothing, transit etc. with generous wiggle room for emergency savings and little joys in life. 
Everyone should get their own UBI account in their own name at birth, along with their social security number. It should follow the individual regardless of guardianship. Parents/guardians should have incrementally less and less control over said funds as the child gets older, and should have to provide itemized receipts of how money taken from a child’s account is spent (Similar to what you have to do if you’re in control of an elder’s social security money).
https://www.ssa.gov/ssi/text-repayee-ussi.htm
'Each year, we will ask certain representative payees to complete a Representative Payee Accounting Report showing how they spent and saved the money they received for you during the 12-month report period.'
These are steps that would could easily institute tomorrow be reallocating funding, and they’d have a huge impact on cost of living for everyone.  
This rant brought to you by the fact that store brand canned luncheon meat in my local grocery held fast at a dollar for the better part of two decades but now costs $2.18.
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enigmaris · 2 months ago
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Another DPXDC for ya fellas!
Pandora, the ghost, was an Amazon from Themyscira in life, losing her life to trap all of those eldritch horrors in her box. In her afterlife, she has kept in contact with the other Amazons, coming to their aid when called upon.
So when the first child of themyscira was molded out of clay, Pandora knew. She liked Diana, admired her stubbornness, strength, and sense of wonder. She knew the girl had left to go to the world of man a while ago, but hadnt heard anything else about her. She wasnt worried about her though, Diana was the strongest of all the Amazons, kind and brave. The world of man would not pose too much of a danger to her.
After the whole thing her box getting stolen and Danny returning it to her. She takes on something if a motherly role to Phantom. She doesn't really know how kids work though, she comes from a race of women where there were no children. Diana is literally the only living child she has ever known. Pandora herself was never even a child. When Danny flees from his life in Amity Park (reveal gone wrong, family dies, or something) he goes to Pandora who wants to help him, but her acropolis is no place for a half living boy. So she tells him about her niece Diana.
"She was the only child of my people, when she grew up she left to the world of man."
Literally the only child??? Danny is imagining like, someone maybe his sister Jazzs age who ran away from home because she lived on an island with all adults and no fun. It does not help his assumption that Pandora talks about Diana like shes still wet from the clay she was molded in.
Danny is given a letter written by Pandora, asking Diana to help care for him and told that last Pandora heard her little niece lived in Washington DC. Danny goes to DC and manages to find Diana based on Pandora description. She is not at all what Danny was imagining, but she takes him to her home and reads the letter describing Danny's heroics with Pandoras box.
Diana Prince takes one look at this human boy and thinks to herself: if Bruce and Clark can just show up with a teenager, then why can't i?
Queue the next Justice League meeting:
"I would like to introduce my son, Daniel of Themyscira, he will be accompanying me on all Justice League missions. No Batman i will no be accepting any criticism from you of all people."
Danny, in human form, waves at the team of heroes with his string bean arms.
"Hi."
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suntails · 2 months ago
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growing up!
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1caru · 6 months ago
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what if venti combined his wisp and human forms
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maxgicalgirl · 11 months ago
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Being a “Fun Fact !” kind of autistic is all fun and games until you get halfway through sharing an interesting tidbit and realize that it probably wasn’t appropriate to share in polite company and now you have to deal with the consequences :(
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hilacopter · 7 months ago
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tbh ryoko kui cooked with this one why is this the funniest image I have ever seen
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splendidfemalelegs · 22 days ago
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Hey gorgeous wife 😍😻🥰
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ngatwa · 3 months ago
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I know how you feel about him. I watch you, Agatha. Just as closely as you watch everyone else. This walk with another woman's son on a road that doesn't…
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garpen · 8 months ago
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12 yrs old Jason having just been dropped off at Wayne Manor: Do you just take in every orphan you meet off the street?
Bruce: No, you're the first kid I picked up off the street. I picked up my last one at the circus.
Jason: Is that a joke? I can’t tell if that’s a joke.
Bruce: My son's name is Richard, but he insists on going by Dick.
Jason: And he’s…from the circus?
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gotchibam · 2 months ago
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Commissioned piece for @sinelanguage! 😼🔪
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mothfulhansel · 8 months ago
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some magma doodles from earlier
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makenna-made-this · 5 months ago
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CompliHENtary colors💙🧡
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real talk having the 2nd worst new years eve yet 🤢🤢🤢 (throat infection, twisted neck, banged-about-foot, ego AND the rest o' me all bruised like misjuggled peaches 🍑🍑🍑)
im bent outa shape and suspectin the universe owes me 8 buck if anyone wannsa chip in
#yes the 🍑🍑🍑was just an excuse to shove ass emojis in your face i'm only (occasionally. allegedly) human#now ask me about my FIRST worst new year eve. it involves wizards and portals and elaborate lies i make up on the spot#SAD REAL TALK <STARTS>:#also made the mistake of reaching out to my mom post-xmas#like what kind of c-ptsd NOOB does that. what kinda chronic holiday trauma survivor NOVICE??? embarrassing#THE SEDUCTIVE FALSE HOPE OF NOSTALGIA WILL LURE YOU IN EVERY TIME#'oh but maybe they won't disappoint me. but maybe they won't rip my heart out this time'#sweetheart that's your dear sweet inner child's yearning for what never was or will be. BEAT IT BACK WITH A STICK!#SAD REAL TALK <ENDS>#....back to that part where i talked about being bent out of shape#if anyone w/ metalwork skills wants ta take a blowtorch & hammer & tongs & have at... I'm open to experimentation is all im sayin#in lieu of that i would also welcome someone buying me a sandwich. i am. so sore.#(metaphysically sore but also the other more urgent im-at-my-daily-NSAIDs-limit kinda sore)#(hence: sanwimch)#...i got so sleepy writing this i started imagining the astonishing hedonism#of stroking a freshly grilled cheese-dripping sandwhich across my body like a loofah#the soothingness of the gooey warm near liquid cheese. the vaguely spongelike quality of toasted sourdough slice.#look i didn't imagine it on PURPOSE it just came to me like a vision like a threat#like one of those weird mens locker room ads where the sportsball is watermelon??? u know the one#where there's nudity & food & homoerotica & hot steaming showers in the background and STILL the overall effect is more offputting than sex#look i have a throat infection. i can barely swallow. i'm sipping chocolate milk to survive and i'm NOT EVEN ENJOYING IT. each drop is agon#(opposite side of the Tantalus spectrum but i'm suffering more than he has in 3.5 thousand years)#i'm dehydrated. barely conscious. electrolytes are circling down the drain. doctors should be incubating me w/ capri sun straws right now.#I GET A PASS ON THESE TAGS#i don't know what i wrote! and i don't stand by it! and you can't make me read em!!!
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t00thpasteface · 1 year ago
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"it's very problematic to make your space aliens autistic-coded" SPEAK FOR YOURSELF 👽👽👽👽👽🛸🛸🛸 ALIEN LASER BLAST ATTACK ✨✨✨🌠🌠🌠🌠🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
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