#my house is so clean

[mcapriglione-art]

what do you want!!!!!!!!

[kensatou]

fascinated/horrified by this set of tweets…

[wanologic]

and they were roommates

[ashfdhfgdsfk]

which movies have you watched the most amount of times? they dont have to be your actual favorite movies, just the ones youve rewatched most. for example: mine are the final destination movies and scream

[megueggu]

pet her! for @pup_hime ✨

[cubbihue]

Uhm is Chimmy Changa doing well? Its seems he has started to divert from what changelings are supposed to do and act like is the static not staticing correctly is he become aware that something is wrong?

Diverting? Well we can’t have that!!!!

Don’t worry. I’ve increased the noise since our last interference. If it happens again, we will issue a good reset!! Thank you for your report.

Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]

[ruinedgautier]

this came to me from my irl at a dennys

[gurggggleburgle]

As a former horse girl I love the Binghorses drawn by @meltedmush because every weird and cryptid suggestion and art of them just existing makes me stop and go: no wait horses will just do that. Horses are so weird. Horse behavior is so much

Horses will just stare at you through a window and if they're smart they can figure out certain doors. There is a specific kind of surreal of watching a horse walk into your house that is both very cute and cursed. SQQ could totally wake up to a Binghorse having broken into his house and staring at him

Horses also are weird and poorly designed biologically so if they sit for too long they can actually crush their organs and won't be able to stand up again. So I can see SQQ fretting over a bingfoal and asking if they're okay. Also they don't have the ability to sense being full. It is completely possible for a horse to eat too much and die. So again fretting mother hen SQQ planning special Binghorse diet only for Binghorse to come back and drop a dead bird in front of him.

It is completely plausible that SQQ can look up one day and see a binghorse sitting in a tree. Both cows and horses will climb trees. Goats too. I don't know why. They just will. The horse loose in a hospital bit is funny because horses on their own will just do that. They do just end up in places. It feels absurd but it's true. Getting jumped scared by a Binghorse totally believable.

Imagine that SQQ sees a Binghorse with a broken leg! The death knell of any normal horse. He can frett over those beautiful terribly designed legs as Binghorse is kept suspended in a swing thing.

And then the moment you combine omnivore snatch hunter it gets even funnier because I'm certain a real horse would if it could. The fact that people are in any way convinced horses are just cute and sweet and not weird terrifying little horrors of biology will never not be funny.

[becca-e-barnes]

Cannot stop thinking about making a really submissive Bucky cum until he can't anymore 😵‍💫

I love the thought of working load after load from him and the way that he'd go from being pretty quiet and composed to whimpering and writhing, unsure if he needs more or less of your touch.

Getting him to a stage where he feels empty. He feels like he has nothing left to give you. You've made him watch as you jerk him off with a delightfully lubed hand, squeezing and tugging until his cock is twitching and throbbing and shooting thick, messy stripes of cum against your palm. You don't stop after he's finished though. His release only makes the glide of your hand smoother and the sight of his own pearly cum being worked back over his cock makes him hard again in no time.

"Please." He groans, throwing his head back, exposing his beautiful throat. Your hand tightens around his cock involuntarily and you find yourself almost wishing you had your other hand around his neck. "Please don't make me cum again. I-I can't."

Bless him, his strong thighs are twitching, his muscles tense, trying to force his body to listen to his brain for just a second.

"Sweetheart, I don't think you're empty yet. You gave me so much cum just a few minutes ago." You let yourself give in just a little, leaning over and kissing along the column of his throat, enjoying the light salty perspiration against your lips.

Bucky rolls his hips but it's hard for him to tell if he's trying to lean into your touch or away from it. In truth, he loves feeling like this. He loves having his cum milked from him and having no choice but to enjoy the mind numbing pleasure of your body.

His thighs are streaked with evidence of his own lust and he's almost ashamed that he's still hard. Not just as hard as he was when you started though.

"F-Fuck." The slick sound of your hand pumping him quickly is overwhelming. Your grip is tight on his shaft while you cup his balls, squeezing and teasing them gently, encouraging them to work overtime for you.

"I can't cum again. I can't." Bucky pants, whimpering when he forces his eyes to meet yours again.

"You told me that last time. I'm not sure when you decided it would be a good idea to lie to me but I promise you, it isn't." Your tone would make him tense but he's tense already, trying to hold back an orgasm he truly doesn't need.

"This is the last orgasm I want from you. You can manage it for me, can't you?" You sound so sincere this time, he can't help but agree.

"Good boy. Now cum nice and hard for me. I want to hear how pathetic you sound."

For the next few minutes, there are no sounds except the delightfully wet sound of your hand working lube and cum against his dick and the frantic moans of a man reaching a level of pleasure that verges just nicely on painful.

When he does cum, you let it splash against your palm once more and you notice how little he's able to provide you with. He's entirely empty, legs shaking but babbling how grateful he is for the way you touch him.

Now that he's spent, it feels like your turn to enjoy yourself while he watches and nothing sounds better than touching yourself with the hand that's covered in his cum.

[starry-bi-sky]

mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.

now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.

He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.

(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)

The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.

The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.

And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.

(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)

The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.

anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)

[willowser-but-nsfw]

sometimes i imagine bakugou getting so turned on by like. the most inane things and being so mad about it LOL

at four in the morning, coming home from patrol, and he's so fucking tired and sweaty and greasy and the first thing he does is head straight for a shower. and he passes through your room and you're sprawled out all wild in the bed, a leg hanging half off the mattress, and you're in a too-big shirt of his that's ridden up at your ribs, giving him a clear view of your soft stomach and how easily you're breathing.

and i think he gets severe, primitive cute aggression !! because you're so sweet and soft and dead to the world and safe in his home !! and he just gets to stand there and watch you for a little bit and he kind of wants to talk to you, misses you and wants your attention, gets a funny feeling in his stomach that he brushes off as goddamn butterflies, because he's so in love with you that it's sickening, but he goes off to take his shower. half asleep himself under the stream, letting the hot water loosen some of his tension, uncoiling the muscles in his back and his shoulders and scrubbing his skin until it's warm and tender. and when he gets out, he grabs a towel to run over his face and through his hair and his mouth is open and he just. inhales the scent of you. because he's picked up your towel by accident and it's still a little damp and reeks of your body wash.

and then he's just like a dog akdbehshak eyes pop open so wide when he realizes it's not talking that he wants to do with you. can't stop replaying the blissed out look on your face from the other day when he had you underneath him. blood rushes from his head so fast that it could make him sick, and he peeks out the bathroom door to see you still stretched out, the material of his shirt caught underneath you and pulled taut over the soft swell of your breast and he didn't realize before, but you're sleeping in those athletic shorts that are too tight and too short and if you lifted your leg a little higher, he could see your ass-cheek and —

so he's just left standing there LOL stark naked, dick hard, still dripping from the shower, your towel shoved up to his face like a fucking animal, thinking oh no. oh fuck. what now. because he's not gonna wake you up for this, and his body is exhausted. can feel the depth of the circles under his eyes, he probably looks like shit. gotta work early afternoon, so katsuki thinks maybe if he gets a solid three hours of sleep, he'll be ready to go before you have to get up for work.

just lays down beside you and stares at the ceiling. face red, because he's so pissed that he's suddenly 21 again and doesn't know how to get himself together around you. and it doesn't help when you wiggle around to cuddle up to him, placing a hand on his chest as you hum out a sleepy, "welcome home."

(of course, you like to talk to him after work, too, especially when your schedules clash and there's not much time to spend together. your body wakes up on instinct when you feel the bed sink with his weight, and he's very short with you and you don't understand until he rolls on his side and pulls you back against him, and then you're finally opening your eyes and peeking over your shoulder at him because, "are you hard right now?" but katsuki just buries his face in your hair and grumbles to himself. you don't think there's anything remotely sexy about you right now, but he nips you when you laugh and you really don't mind that much when he peels your shorts off, anyway.)

[househrt]

Hilson vampire AU with vampire Wilson and human House, where Wilson does all the Ethical vampire things like not biting humans or taking blood from living creatures, instead just relying on the government-provided synthetic blood packs that barely suppress his hunger and still leave him lethargic and tired enough that people are starting to get concerned

when House finds out, his first response is well that's stupid - just drink from me, dumbass, you've got a free supply of blood right here and Wilson's pupils immediately go wide as hell but he still refuses out of principle

when Wilson eventually gives in and bites House (because of course he will), he keeps pulling back before his hunger is satisfied because he's scared of hurting House - but House eggs him on in that cocky insulting way he does, just to get Wilson to take whatever he needs even as he's getting lightheaded from the blood loss

[iamtheunicornwizard]

they're so cute frfr

[boylikeanangel]

crowley didn't ask aziraphale's name because he already knew it he went up to speak to him on the wall because they'd met before and he knew aziraphale wouldn't hurt him aziraphale didn't object to the snake being in the garden and didn't draw his sword on it when it came near because he recognised what the snake turned into he protected crowley from the rain with his wing because crowley was his friend once they don't act like strangers on the wall because THEY WERE NOT STRANGERS they knew each other they've always been connected even before the earth existed before demons existed before they had to be enemies before war happened before hatred was even invented they have literally always been like this

[spearxwind]

I dont wanna make too many posts about this bc its genuinely just tragic but if you have the heart, and especially if youve ever vacationed here in Spain or are/were planning on doing so, please please please get informed about the current situation happening here, and please have the heart to worry about the PEOPLE who are suffering.

I have not seen any coverage of the floods here anywhere off country but a few select papers; and while I dont really expect news from my country to reach so far, and I also know that the current situations everywhere are dire too, its very very telling that hundreds of thousands of tourists make their way here every year and yet we never hear a peep of worry or even just sympathy from anyone.

I have seen a bunch of people worry about how the things we export to their country will be affected, and how tourism destinations will be affected. Please have some fucking decency. We are not a lifeless hotel complex, we are a country with people just like you. And right know we are suffering a great tragedy. The very least you can do is keep us in your thoughts.

[melonpaya]

Old comic doodle I found