#my fear is Ill accidentally copy someone elses post

[pinazee]

The problem with coming into a decades old and thriving fandom, is having freshly formed fetus feelings about something that has already been feasted on by others

Like what am i supposed to do with this screaming crying infant ma’am? It needs to be fed and i cant do it by myself

[shattered-catalyst]

OCD Subtypes for the RPC

Part 1 is here

Well well well, we are back for Part 2 of the Roleplayer’s Guide to OCD.

Fellow Ocd Folks, I see you in those tags and I'm going to do my best to ensure those obsessions are represented here- BUT understand that physically it is not going to be possible to list every single one because I am one person.  Regardless its incredibly brave of you all to rb and add things in the tags, I know its hard to talk about this shit and I see you. I see you.

Resultantly I typed this out and posted it in formatting to assist with accessibility in mind; if you cannot read it still ( I tried Im sorry!) i recommend the copy and paste method or getting the chrome extension bee-line reader.

 There will be grammatical and spelling mistakes. Im sure spacing is odd some places, but you have to understand doing this is extremely anxiety provoking for me so Im just getting it done when I can.

Remember to use your critical thinking; not everyone has the same symptoms/compulsions/triggers and all that.

OCD is fluid. Its like liquid mercury. One day its a handful of subtypes another day its another different serving.

If you are in general squicked about certain topics even by mention read ahead with your own judgement. Remember us folks that have OCD have many disturbing and distressing experiences so if you are writing a character who has OCD and you can’t read about it just don’t give them that obsessive thought/ compulsion. Make sure writing is still a safe and enjoyable hobby for yourself first and foremost.

But ethically and morally I cannot and will not leave out the more disturbing bits. You have the ability to scroll by, I and many others do not get the chance to escape triggering content that our own mind creates.

So read ahead with your best judgement or at least skip around the squicky parts and educate yourself on what OCD is so people quite using it as a Obsessive Christmas/Corgi/Cat Disorder thing. Alright? Cool beans.

Okay so you made it passed post 1 and got under the read more. Give yourself a gold star for diving into this monster of a document.

Below is a crash course it is not meant to replace actual psychoeducation, personal research, or google. Honestly most of us do our research extensively but because OCD is treated so horribly by social media, media, and society in general.

I wasn’t sure where to throw these together because the education tools to learn fully about OCD are very specialized and thus very restricted. I found that many people DO have these experiences with OCD though so I will represent them throughout. I’ll also sprinkle some of my own experiences so you can get a good reference of a person who has the disorder and not just a randomly generated person.

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So OCD is made up of Obsessions, Trigger, Intrusive thought, Misinterpretation/feared consequence,Somatic and Psychological Anxiety, and Compulsions/Rituals.

Your character may not be able to list all of these. In fact if they aren't in ERP therapy they may not be able to puzzle these things out. But YOU as the writer should know them. Your character won’t be walking around talking to just ANYONE that they have OCD. Remember a huge aspect of OCD is it’s Shame.  The disorder makes us feel intense shame regarding our intrusive thoughts, as a result OCD goes undiagnosed for years especially if it has pediatric onset.

  We won’t tell anyone what we are experiencing or why we are doing x y or z. We act like nothing is wrong because to emotionally react is to admit to yourself- and therefore the world- that you have had this intrusive thought and are therefore by virtue a horrible person.[For further information I would suggest also researching PANDAS].

It may be noticeable if your character has an intrusive thought. They may wince or grimace or roll their eyes certainly, but they won’t open up to Joe at the cafe about how their brain is constantly torturing them. I apparently have a very noticeable eye twitch.

 Depending on the nature of the intrusive thought it will get more or less of a reaction out of me. Its usually dependent on how distressing the intrusive thought is and/or if its a new one.

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You see OCD doesn’t sit still. It never looks the same. You’ll have your long haul intrusive thoughts that are with you for years but then you’ll have weird ass ones that just appear and demand their voice be heard yelling about cars hitting people or squirrels getting eaten.

Some people have similar ones! So while everyone is different there will always be someone out there with an intrusive thought similar to yours.

 For instance; I bonded emotionally with a lady on reddit because we both have intrusive thoughts during storms that animals and the homeless are dying. We were both horribly relieved to find another person and also distressed that every snow or rain storm brings horrible images and whispers to your mind that while you are warm and snug in bed someone is freezing to death. And its all your fault.

Some days are better than others. As with all mental illnesses it isn’t CONSTANT ALARM BELLS. Some days it will be all alarms and other days it will be like a gentle whisper on the breeze. You can almost not notice it. Almost.

Obsessive thoughts run the gauntlet from ‘i will/could have/may/may accidentally harm etc’ something that you hold of value. This is any obsessive thought that you have: you think about repeatedly and not by choice, it is very anxiety provoking, it is unwanted, and unwelcome.

 Mine run the scale from ‘squirrel will be murdered’ to ‘being responsible for harm’.

Compulsions or ‘rituals’ are any behavior done to alleviate the anxiety from the intrusive thought and trigger object. In short, compulsions and rituals are not fun. they are absolutely not logical, and we know they are not logical but we are forced to do them. Thats why its a disorder. 

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To emphasize from post 1: magical thinking and the faulty link between thoughts and actions are hallmarks of OCD.  Magical thinking can be anything from contamination to if I turn around three times or stare really hard at something the bad thing wont happen. Sounds weird and is weird and we know it is thats why its a disorder and not a delusion.

The faulty belief that thought=action is the biggest hurdle it is incredibly difficult to grasp, at least for me maybe some of you that have done further ERP can attest, that the mere concept of a thought not being the same as an action is completely and totally mind blowing.

Free will? Yeah thats terrifying. IDK about anyone else but free will is absolutely terrifying; what do you mean i could do anything i wanted?

Thats how you face OCD(WITH A TRAINED THERAPIST). You give in to ambiguity and the unknown. Its breaking that link between thought and action. Its incredibly difficult and draining. A five minute exposure leaves me in shatters for a week and two five minute ones had me ripping my nails past the nail beds with anxiety.

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Just a reminder: Do not have your character expose themself or expose folks with OCD to a trigger to “ help us get over with”. That is literally forcing someone with a mental illness into a break down and is not helpful. In fact its worse because a person knows about this intrusive thought and they tried to make it real. More shame and some trauma. 

If you have OCD, more likely than not a family member or significant other has tried this with the purest of intentions. But it never works like that. Theres a reason that therapists get special training for this. If people want a post on ERP I can make one at some point. 

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Actually let’s drag me with the squirrel thing as the example- fellow OCD Folks get out a pen and paper and try breaking down one of yours;

Obsession:Squirrel will be murdered

Trigger: seeing a squirrel

 Intrusive thought: Graphic images of a squirrel being murdered by a hawk/ impaling depending on the day

Misinterpretation/feared consequence: Squirrel will be killed and its all my fault

Somatic and Psychological Anxiety:intense anxiety, palms sweating, heart racing,

Compulsions/Rituals: Must stare at the squirrel to prevent bad things from happening, 

Now imagine if that is every time you see a fucking squirrel. You have somehow become completely and totally transfixed on a squirrel and nothing is going to pull your attention away or the squirrel dies- which your mind is giving you lovely images of btw.

Cute right?

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Below are the subtypes with general information/example thoughts/ and how some of these have impacted me socially because apparently some people dont understand that mental illnesses impact their social lives?? yall...

Social: This can range from ‘ i am constantly thinking i did something wrong so i have to ask for reassurance that we are still friends’ to completely unrealistic worries. Maybe its an intrusive thought that ‘ your voice is annoying them’ . There’s reassurance seeking, internal and external checking.

 It makes friendships extremely difficult and exhausting. You’re not trying to get to know someone with an annoying frat boy egging on anxiety in your brain. This can also manifest as having strict rules for yourself and ethical codes. 

My therapist likes to say she could give us (folks with OCD) a pile of hundred dollar bills and come back and they’d all be returned. Because OCD makes you so strict and morally confined. Which ISNT fun. Like I dont get pleasure over having to memorize the entire Code of Conduct!

Social Media: Its the bane of human existence some days and a lifeline the next. But what if everytime your follower count was an odd/even number it sent you into a panic attack. What if you spent all your time with intrusive thoughts that somehow someone misinterpreted a post or that someone is going to be harmed by a post you made about tapirs. 

You may be forced to block people to get your number down or keep pornbots on your blog to keep your number what you like (see there is a use for them! We sacrifice those before actual users!) You may be refreshing your page every second because ‘what if you miss a message’. It's going to look a lot like ‘check check check check reassure yourself double check your posts check check check reassure check check FALSE MEMORY check your post etc’

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Clothing/Body Image: When its not Body Dysmorphia it can be OCD. Sometimes this looks like I obsess about a body part and therefore I choose my clothes/hairstyles to hide those.  Some personal examples: as a kid I was sure that mind readers exist ( THIS IS AN OCD THING TOO I was so relieved to find that out) and that if i didnt wear  a particular hat they would see all these horrible thoughts and it would be revealed what an awful person I was. So I wore the same dumb ass bucket hat for a year (or more I cannot remember but it was a long ass time).

I was once so fixated on being given a compliment on my eye color that I wore sunglasses (even at night) to a summer camp. And if any of those teen girls in that cabin that stood up and mocked me in a crowded lunch hall by singing ‘i wear my sunglasses at night’ you all owe me 40$.

Even younger still I had intrusive thoughts. Like say, if anyone noticed I was female that i would be kidnapped so I chopped my hair very short. I altered my appearance to be very androgynous and even switched to walking more masculine. Because omg if your hips move someones going to kill you thats just how it works. ( It doesnt help I later figured out I was a lesbian)

Your wardrobe may be impacted by OCD and yes so can your body image.

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Also yes the fear of mind readers is also a thing; i always thought I was somehow faking OCD because yes that is also a…..

Faking: Do you value telling the truth? Do you detest lying ? Boy Howdy do I have some news for you. OCD is going to try and convince you that YOU LIED. Whether it was on a chastity pledge to get a free sandwich or in a conversation you just HAD. This links a lot with false memory OCD.

Another aspect is OCD makes us doubt we have OCD and tries to convince us we have any other diagnosis under the sun and we are obviously faking our OCD.

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Sexual Orientation OCD; It is as it is called. Sexual Orientation OCD is what happens when your brain goes ‘hold on what if you’re not this orientation what if you are THAT’. It doesn’t matter where on the LGBT umbrella you fall you will have OCD trying to convince you otherwise. From compulsive staring at members of the same/opposite gender to compulsively reassuring or checking with yourself to ensure that ‘ no no you are in fact THIS orientation.’ 

This can range in behavior from binge watching porn, staring compulsively to check that there is OR is NOT attraction,self checking past experiences and memories, analyzing your clothing and your lifestyle in painful and intricate methods.

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False Memory OCD; False memory OCD is basically your brain sitting you in a noir interrogation room, handcuffing you to a chair grilling you. It demands that you did *insert bad thing here*. This can range from anything from something Harm based to pretty much *anything* from other OCD subtypes. Which is quite delightful really.

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Sensorimotor OCD; Sensorimotor OCD is obsessive body responses. These can be ‘ I have to cough really hard and really feel it right in my chest and if I can’t get it right I have to cough until I do’. This can be counting your heartbeats. Trying to check yourself that you in fact have a heart and checking and reassuring that it is still beating. It can be hyper-awareness of swallowing or even swallowing repeatedly. It is anything with selective attention; ie its an automated process but your OCD is forcing you to be aware of it.

Your OCD makes you aware of the sensation of, say, breathing, and then it convinces you that if you stop paying attention to it you will stop breathing. So now you’re horribly aware and focused solely on breathing and breathing alone. It keeps me up most nights with the pounding anxiety fueled by the pressure of ‘if you stop focusing on breathing you will stop breathing completely’ or waiting to feel that last heartbeat in your chest. 

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Existential OCD; You ever feel existential ? Existential OCD is like having a very aggressive existential crisis that turns you into NEEDING answers IMMEDIATELY. This can look anything from hours panic scrolling the net to panic inducing anxiety because you don't know what happens after death. The thoughts are like foghorns on a misty sea.

This sounds basic and the only example i can give is as a teeny tiny 7 year old I had a panic attack in bed screaming that ‘ what if im a dinosaur and im asleep and i wake up and my whole family is GONE’.

To be fair I did like dinosaurs a lot.

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Harm OCD; This is pretty self explanatory but I will give more details. Harm OCD is OCD demanding that you will/could/can/may have/might harmed yourself/others/any living creature and that you alone are responsible. 

This means anything from getting anxious driving over crosswalks because ‘what if you dont see one and hit someone and its all your fault and you hit someone go back and make sure you havent hit anyone’ to ‘im holding a knife so im going to accidentally stab someone’ to ‘ i didnt see my cat this morning and now im at work and think she must be dead and i am responsible for her demise.’

 It can be as simple as ‘if i use a pencil i will stab myself in the eye’ or as complex as ‘ i may accidentally say a slur’/ ‘ i am going to say this horrible thing out loud if i cannot control myself.’ It can also be images of terror or racist/sexist/ableist jokes in your mind that repeat like a broken record.

(Please note from section 1 that this is extremely anxiety provoking and not something you would do. OCD preys on what we respect the most.)

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pOCD; Tumblr listen the fuck up because I am tired of seeing people get called shit on this website for having this mental illness. People who experience pOCD are not pedophiles, they do not get any pleasure or benefit. The thoughts and images are meant to induce harm to the person experiencing them. Children are normally the trigger for this and the resulting images can be very graphic. Again you aren’t attracted to children- thoughts of them getting harmed hurt you so your OCD makes you see them.

Know this so you can advocate for folks with pOCD in real life. Remember we are here. We are suffering and we are terrified of your children.

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Poisoning others/or in your food; Life isn’t medieval anymore but sometimes OCD demands we have a food taster or that we obsessively worry that we may kill someone with our cooking. Personally I struggle with colorblindness so I am constantly fretful over cooking any sort of meat so it’s difficult for me to cook it.

 However this also comes as; obsessive horrible thoughts of your cooking kill someone or that you have somehow/accidentally poisoned someone’s food (even if you haven’t touched it or been within a foot of it ) or that someone has poisoned YOUR food even if no one has touched it except you. You’re going to be picking apart your food or unable to eat out at all.

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Emotional Contamination: It’s similar to magical thinking and this terrifying prospect of mind readers. Emotional contamination can manifest as anything from intense worry over somehow gaining someone else’s negative personality traits.

 Or that somehow by interacting with any role of someone horrible will make YOU somehow also responsible for the horribleness.  There is usually a person or a type of person that is a trigger, but it can also be location based.

 This is one subtype where magical thinking and superstition are apparent.  

For instance; as a teen if a male was in my space or had physical contact;like shaking hands,giving a high five, being in my room etc. I would have to go around and physically touch all the objects that I perceive they may have also touched as a way to cancel out their presence. 

This includes wiping off myself to negate even the touch of family members. It really hurts peoples feelings, my father was especially hurt by this.

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Physical Contamination: This goes beyond physical dirt and grime. Most of us dont have spotless homes because if you’re having a fist fight with your brain everyday cleaning falls by the wayside just like it would for anyone else. Physical contamination holds 2 things: physical contamination obsessions AND compulsive cleaning behaviors/rituals. We believe that a small amount of a contaminate can cover large surfaces.

 Oh, and did I mention its not JUST dirt/germs/viruses. The list is expansive but heres a mixed bag of what they can be: sticky substances,dead animals,glitter (FUCKING GLITTER),negative words or language,colors, numbers, surfaces in general, food, people, and activities.  There is also a hyper responsibility to protect yourself and others from ‘contamination’.

Strangely there is a magical separation between the contaminated world and the ‘clean’ one. Spaces designated as clean would be a bedroom/bathroom/workspace where you are most active. That space is where the compulsions and intrusive thoughts occur. Its not I MUST CLEAN EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME. Otherwise I would be working cleaning houses because why the hell not amiright?

A real world example from a colleague would be a young man with physical contamination OCD is struck with such intrusive thoughts about cleaning that they refuse to allow anyone in their room or any animals in their home. But they are not able to even flush the toilet, take out the trash, wash dishes, or do garbage because of their intrusive thoughts.

The most famous would be compulsive hand washing but I feel it is important to also note OTHER aspects of physical contamination because everyone sees the hand scrubbing stereotype. 

Other compulsions include intricate rituals, not touching the floor (i played X-treme the floor is lava during college. I couldnt let my feet touch the floor because it was ‘dirty’),excessive showering (2-8+ hour showers guys, 8 hour showers. Thats what we’re talking about.)

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Relationship OCD: This comes as no surprise that yes you will have intrusive thoughts that you are somehow harming/ will harm/ may accidentally harm your significant other. Whether that be by physical or emotional means. It can look like ‘ I may have lied to her about how much I love her’, ‘ i may not actually love her and I may be leading her on’, and ‘ I must be corrupting her’. These can extend to certain physical activities with false memory OCD as a cherry on top. A great finishing garnish to leave you feeling absolutely dismayed and unable to trust your own perception.

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Scrupulosity: Religion! Whatever that may be! Its a thing with OCD.  With Scrupulosity obsessive thoughts run all over the board from; you committed a sin and forgot about it you monster to having to pray continuously/ a certain time/ until its right. What is right?Ask OCD that’s the only person who knows. 

We are fairly certain my grandfather had OCD because he went to church for every single Catholic Mass. Every single day. Every. Single. Day.  That’s not a healthy amount of attendance(I'm calling you out posthumously because I care Robert!). This can also look like: praying a certain amount of times. Praying until you do it ‘right’. Confessing every single potential sin. Cataloguing and dwelling over ‘sinful’ things. 

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Symmetry or Just Right OCD: Symmetry OCD is the runner up for ‘most likely recognized on tv shows’ award.

Symmetry OCD convinces you that if *insert thing here* isnt symmetrical or ‘just right’ (a magical position or number of objects that makes 0 logical sense) that something bad will happen.

This can range from the known; rearranging things. But it also looks like buying more objects until you reach the right amount and even throwing out objects if theres ‘too many’.

It can range from ‘the walls are percievably not straight so now i avoid that room at all costs otherwise i will be trapped traveling the edges of the wall with my eyes otherwise it will fall in and murder us ALL.’ to ‘ this historical bust is one inch off to the left and now all i see is visions of it breaking against the ground.’

So that is what I have time for. 9 pages on subtypes and basic information. If you find yourself wanting me information all of this is easily accessible online. So go, be free and dont ever compare people to Monk again. Write Batman and Scott Summers with OCD. Give us ACTUAL representation and not throw away joke lines. We are here. Our suffering isnt funny. We deserve representation too.

[shepherds-of-haven]

hello dear author... halloween draws near... so what is each ro's greatest fear? (and yours! BOO!)

Anon this is really messing me up because it’s March

Also, I answered this back in 2018, so I’ll copy-past here with some revisions and Briony!

ROs’ worst fears:

Blade: being helpless in general sends him into kind of a spiral: I’d say his worst fear is not being able to protect or do anything for the people he cares about, especially while they’re suffering. Also, while not necessarily phobic about them, he really hates snakes. 

Trouble: he has a fear of drowning. Like most city kids in Haven, he never learned how to swim.

Tallys: she’s claustrophobic. You will not get her to go into a cave or underground or really anywhere dark and dank.

Shery: poor girl’s afraid of a lot of things. Dogs kind of freak her out when they bark (and they do tend to bark at her) and she’s also afraid of horseback riding due to an incident when she was a child. Also sometimes the dark. Weirdly enough, though, she reads a lot of horror books.

Chase: being alone or dying imprisoned. Like super imprisoned, in a little dark cell that he can never get out of, not a jail he can engineer his escape from.

Riel: germaphobe. He’s trying to get better about it, though. Also, dying early without getting to leave a mark on the world. 

Halek: accidentally killing someone he cares about. It will make sense when you meet him in the game… Also, being trapped by his own mistakes and dying with regrets. 

Red: stinging insects make him scream like a little girl. Also, someone else he cares about paying for the consequences of his own actions; like he brings home a cursed object but the curse doesn’t affect him, but does harm a loved one. 

Ayla: dying alone… Also has a weird thing about getting trampled by a large animal. Anything bigger than her makes her jittery. Also, dying of hunger/thirst. 

Briony: losing her powers, the only part of her identity that she really has after losing her memories--this would also make her feel terribly weak and vulnerable, which is another related and very deep fear. Related: having an illness that leaves her not in control of her own mind or body. 

Lavinet: she gets a little queasy around heights. There’s also an old children’s story about this thing called the ratra that reduces her to a blubbering little girl.

Croelle: spoilers... 

My worst fears:

Darkness

Sea creatures like sharks, jellyfish, eels, etc.

Reblogging a seemingly-uncontroversial post like a funny take on a new movie or a Naruto meme, but unbeknownst to me the OP is like a huge advocate of child slavery or something and my life is ruined

Worms

[phantom-le6]

Film Review - Justice League vs The Fatal Five

Hello all, and welcome to my first review on Tumblr in the wake of Facebook scrapping its Notes functionality, thereby forcing me to shift platforms (a practice I hope I won’t have to keep repeating).  To kick off my use of this new posting platform, I’m reviewing one of the two new films I got for Christmas, or rather the two films that are totally new to my collection; the other films I got were better copies of films I already own.  Anyway, we’re taking another dip into the world of DC Comics direct-to-home release animation with a look at Justice League vs The Fatal Five.

Before we get in the review itself, however, quick bit of house-keeping for anyone who hasn’t read one of my reviews before. The structure of my reviews is intro paragraph or two, a plot summary for anyone who has seen the film before and wants to refresh their memory, then the review itself.  The plot and the review are both clearly labelled, so to avoid spoilers just scroll past the section headed as ‘plot’ to the one labelled ‘review’.  Got all that? Ok, then here we go… 

Plot (adapted from Wikipedia):

In the 31st century, Mano, Tharok and Persuader of the Fatal Five attack the Legion of Super-Heroes' headquarters for their time sphere. Star Boy, Saturn Girl and Brainiac 5 try to keep them back but fail. Just as the villains activate the sphere, Star Boy leaps at them and is taken along. Arriving in the 21st century above Earth, Star Boy triggers a boobytrap Brainiac 5 programmed, trapping the villains inside the sphere in a stasis field. Star Boy comes down in Gotham City while the sphere ends up in Metropolis. Star Boy discovers his supply of medicine, needed to stabilize his mind, was destroyed in his rough landing. As his medicine doesn't exist yet, Star Boy's increasingly erratic behaviour gets him apprehended by Batman and taken to Arkham Asylum. The stasis-locked time machine is picked up by Superman and brought to the Justice League's headquarters for analysis. 

Ten months later, Jessica Cruz is struggling with the trauma of her near-death by a murderer who killed her friends, making her afraid to leave her apartment. To add to her anxiety, she has been chosen by a Green Lantern power ring and Wonder Woman keeps trying to recruit her into the Justice League. In Gotham, Miss Martian is trying to prove herself to Batman for membership in the League, but her inexperience works against her good intentions. While trying to unlock the secret of the strange sphere, Mister Terrific accidentally brings down the stasis field, freeing its occupants. Superman and Mister Terrific fight them, but Superman is wounded by Persuader's axe and the villains escape.

 Star Boy's memory is jogged by a news report of the fight, and he breaks out of Arkham. The Justice League members compare notes about these mysterious assailants and discover they are time travellers; and from Star Boy's words, Batman deduces that they are after Jessica. When the three villains attack Jessica, Star Boy comes to her rescue, followed by Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Mister Terrific, and Miss Martian, who force them into flight after a hard struggle. In the aftermath, Star Boy and Jessica form a close friendship based on the fact that both of them are struggling with their mental health.

To find out more about their guests from the future, Batman instructs Miss Martian to telepathically link them (Batman, Miss Martian and Jessica) with Star Boy's memories, thus learning about the Legion. They witness a battle between the Legion and the Fatal Five, which ended with the capture of Mano's lover Emerald Empress and Validus; as there was no prison that could hold them in the 31st century, the Legion took them to Oa in the 21st century. They also learn that if Star Boy misses more than two doses of his medication, it will cease to work and prevent him being in the Legion. 

Upon their awakening, the League receives an ultimatum from Mano: Surrender Jessica or all American cities will be destroyed by bombs created by Tharok. The first bombings start in Metropolis, forcing the Justice League to move out. Left behind with Star Boy in the Watchtower, Jessica is contacted by Tharok through her ring, forcing her to surrender herself to the Five and enable them entry to Oa's prison cells. Despite interference by Kilowog and Salaak, Emerald Empress and Validus are freed, and when Jessica fights back, Persuader cleaves her ring in two. Afterwards, Emerald Empress has her Emerald Eye of Ekron steal the energy of the Central Power Battery, and the Five return to Earth to recover the time sphere. 

In the meantime, Star Boy discovers Jessica's absence and informs the League. The heroes proceed to the time machine's location, a secret US military base, where the Fatal Five force them into battle. Emerald Empress subdues the Justice League and then initiates her master plan to use the Lantern's power to destroy Earth's sun, wipe out humanity, and thus prevent the formation of the Legion in their time. On Oa, Jessica recovers her faith and determination, and by reciting the Green Lantern oath, she reassembles her power ring. Brought back to her apartment by the ring, Jessica flies to the base and prevents the Fatal Five from escaping back to their own era by bringing the whole base down upon them, killing the supervillains. 

Superman, Jessica and Star Boy race after the Eye, but are too late to prevent it from plunging into the sun. As the star cracks apart, Star Boy sacrifices himself by lowering himself into the sun's core and using his powers to reverse the fracturing. In the final scene as the Justice League members commemorate Star Boy's heroism, they are joined by the Legion who have come from the future to honour their fallen comrade. Batman also grants Miss Martian admission into the League for her bravery.

Review:

This film is basically an original story not adapted from anything in particular, and although it is done in the style of the DC Animated Universe that originally revolved around the Batman, Superman and Justice League animated shows of the 1990’s and 2000’s, it is apparently meant to be a stand-alone narrative.  Cast-wise, we get back the like of Kevin Conroy, George Newbern and Susan Eisenberg to reprise their roles as the DC Trinity (Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman) from the Justice League animated series, and well-known voice actors like Kevin Michael Richardson and Tara Strong also feature in this production. 

In terms of character, we’re certainly getting a bit of a different Justice League line-up while also getting DC’s future team the Legion of Superheroes worked into the mix, primarily through the character of Star Boy and the film’s antagonists the Fatal Five.  In terms of the League itself, the customary League core that is the DC Trinity is in place, but then we have no Flash, Miss Martian in place of the better-known Martian Manhunter, and Mr Terrific to add to the team’s diversity in place of using Cyborg.  Finally, we have Jessica Cruz as the team’s Green Lantern, and it’s the use of her and Star Boy in this film that makes this film stand out from any other DC films, because both of these heroes are neurodiverse. 

As fans of more modern DC comics stories, or anyone who has looked into this film’s behind-the-scenes extras, will know, Star Boy is a schizophrenic, but by the 31st century there is medication to manage the behaviours that this form of neurodiversity can cause, so it’s not an uncommon idea among DC’s writers to show Star Boy getting trapped in our time without this medication.  During the Justice League era between Infinity Crisis and Final Crisis (not long before DC did its new 52 reboot and decided to stick to buying pre-2000 Marvel lore), the comics did in fact do this as part of the Legion coming back in time to bring back Wally West, the then-Flash who had become stuck in the Speed Force with his wife and children during the Infinity Crisis. 

By the same token, Jessica Cruz is a Green Lantern who has crippling anxiety following a traumatic event, so she’s having to use a lot of willpower to overcome that anxiety and function like anyone else.  Given that Green Lanterns are chosen based on their ability to overcome great fear, not only does it make a lot of sense for someone battling anxiety to be chosen as a Green Lantern, but it also very effectively demonstrates a much more positive and healthier take on mental illness in the world of superheroes. Granted, DC isn’t being particularly original in this regard; Iron Man’s alcoholism in the comics and his PTSD in the MCU show that Marvel has at least one heroic character that they’ve been willing to showcase as a positive example of what people can do despite being mentally different to others.  Sadly, neither company has yet done a good, positive, accurate take on autism yet, but then if they did, I’d have less fodder for my novel writing. 

Putting two neurodiverse heroes at the core of this film really makes it a great one to watch just because for once it means the neurodiverse characters aren’t the stereotypical crazed villain types and the idiotic stereotypes that stem from such misuse of the mentally divergent in fiction get combatted a little.  Granted, it would have been nicer if DC and WB could have demonstrated this kind of pro-mental health attitude in its live-action film wing by not making the Joker solo film and doing something more akin to this film in its place. There is no doubt in my mind that DC and WB need to put more of the staff behind their animated films on DCEU projects if it ever hopes to seriously compete with the MCU. 

Otherwise, the film is largely just a good diversion; well-animated, well-performed, but not a huge level of plot depth despite putting two neurodiverse characters front and centre on the side of the heroes. Hopefully going forward DC and WB can address that on some future film, either animated or live-action.  For now, I’m going to content myself by handing down a score of 9 out of 10.

[looking-to-the-moon-tonight]

Post Zombie Apocalypse MSA AU(?)

Been re-reading my copy of “The Zombie Survival Guide” by Max Brooks and playing ‘Ghost’ and ‘Hellbent’ on repeat, so this idea popped into my head. Just jotting down ideas so I can figure out how to write this, but feel free to add your own thoughts if you have any.

*The signs have been there for months, a mysterious illness with no known cure, but everyone is passing it off as a new strain of the flu or something similar.

*Vivi is immediately suspicious and wants to scope out the infected areas. The only reason she doesn’t is because Arthur and Lewis convince her otherwise. They don’t have the money to head out at the moment and wouldn’t it be a good idea to research it a little before running off?

*Another case pops up, something big, that completely distracts Vivi from the issue. Lewis and Arthur are relieved.

*(I’m imagining this happening before Ghost, possibly to never happen in exchange for all this.)

*Then some government people show up. Vivi is determined to figure out the real link between them and whatever ‘illness’ is going on.

*They’re doing mandatory health evaluations, claiming to be looking for the ‘illness’. Everyone’s tests come back clean, but for some reason they take a few people: Lewis is included.

*He doesn’t really get to say goodbye, he manages to get a text out to Arthur and Vivi to let them know he’s leaving, but nothing else comes up. The Peppers remain though, for whatever reason. 

*Vivi gets more suspicious and sneaks out to investigate new areas claiming to have the illness. Arthur tags along, but something stops him a lot of the time (maybe Uncle Lance getting worried? I’m not sure, haven’t fleshed this out quite yet)

*Eventually, everyone begins to leave their little town, either heading north where people claim that it’s too cold for the ‘illness’ to survive or out to the country, where it seems to be less prominent. The Yukinos are among the first to move away. 

*Vivi promises to write as often as she can and call whenever she has service. She promises to be careful and send back her findings to Arthur. (Maybe even leaves Mystery with him until her family comes back? Or he gets forgotten in the commotion, leaving him with Arthur till the Yukinos come back?)

*He gets a few updates, but she stops replying after a week or two. Arthur gets even more worried.

*Eventually, almost everyone is gone. Arthur, Lance, The Peppers, and a few stragglers are all that’s left behind.

*One morning, Lance leaves Arthur behind, telling him to ‘Not open the door for anyone’ and ‘To be ready to leave at a moment’s notice’. He figures they’re going to be heading north too.

*Lance doesn’t return though. Arthur is alone till someone begins pounding away at the front door.

*Whatever is going on, Arthur is sure it’s something supernatural at this point. He knows Lance said to not answer the door, but he wants to know what’s going on. 

*He makes sure to grab Lance’s shotgun first. Something tells him he’s going to need it.

*Opens the door and, of course, it’s a zombie. Arthur freaks, barely manages to avoid getting bitten, and accidentally manages to blow the thing’s head off.

*Cue the complete and utter panic over killing someone, even though they had been trying to bite his face off. Mystery (if he’s there) tries to comfort him without revealing himself before dragging Arthur to the van. He knows they can’t stay and wait.

*Arthur doesn’t need to be told twice. They head to town, hoping that someone can tell them what’s going on. Maybe even find Uncle Lance.

*What they find is a completely abandoned town. The few stragglers are nowhere to be seen. No signs of life till they reach Pepper Paradiso. (Maybe the girls are screaming?)

*Arthur and Mystery rush in, Arthur in order to help his missing best friend’s family, Mystery to make sure he doesn’t get eaten alive.

*Find Mr. and Mrs. Pepper either dead or already reanimated, girls trapped in a corner while zombies close in on them.

*Cue big brother Arthur coming in and saving them, despite all his fears. 

*He sends them to the van with Mystery while he takes care of Mr. and Mrs. Pepper. He tries to honor their traditions, remembering the one funeral he went with Lewis for one of their family members. It isn’t perfect, but he’s sure Lewis would have appreciated it. 

*He marks their graves so, if they ever come back, the girls can at least visit. Lewis too if he comes back. A note is left for him to find, explaining what happened and where they’re heading.

*(He has not clue where they're heading. All he knows to do is head to the East/West coast. Maybe his radio picked up on a message before everything cut out?)

*They head out, Arthur with only two things on his mind: get the girls to safety and find his missing family (A.K.A Uncle Lance, Lewis, and Vivi)

Not really sure what would happen from here. I was thinking maybe Arthur loses his arm protecting the girls? Mystery revealing himself in order to save the entire group? I’ll figure it out eventually.

[asuma-kousuke-pics]

Ramblings about Kousuke

Okay so I’m a little hesitant to do this, since it actually goes into some pretty personal stuff of mine but... I really can’t hold back an outpouring of love for Kousuke if I tried so... Here goes.  (Please note: I do mention some of my own personal mental health stuff here so, if anyone isn’t comfortable with that, please feel free to skip this post. I promise we’ll be back to our regularly scheduled Kousuke pictures and videos very soon, especially as I have content from yesterday’s stream).  Also forgive my flowery way of talking. I’m a writer at my core, and sometimes that really, really shows. 

 2015 was, as some already know, the year of the very first Engeki Haikyu!! And the start of a certain someone's career on stage.

At this point I hadn't even heard of Haikyu (though, perhaps I had vaguely spotted the manga on our bookshelves at work, but it was a section I rarely paid much attention to), let alone any of the characters and certainly none of actors playing them on stage.

Within the space of two years however, things would change very rapidly and, eventually lead me in that oddly destined way that life seems to unfold for me, to that one certain actor, Asuma Kousuke.

 Fast forward just a little, to early 2016. After a difficult year previously (and some of my lowest lows yet), I was finally on good tracks again.  I was in a good place. And apparently, I was ready to embrace a brand-new obsession.

Anime and manga.

 I hadn't intended to fall quite so face first, but I guess we all know what that's like. 

I remember, very distinctly seeing a video pop up on my timeline on twitter. Pretty sure most people have seen it. That one where all the members of Engeki Haikyu come up to the camera, in character and say a few things and generally play around. Yeah, that one. I saw that and, though I didn’t even really know Haikyu very well yet, I knew vaguely enough to know where they were from. And I got /that/ feeling. I often talk about fate and destiny and for the most part I probably sound pretty silly, but my instincts are usually right. I remember thinking, ‘… one of you is going to end up being very important. I don’t know which one, and I don’t know in what way. But one of you. Definitely.’

That was the very first time I saw Kousuke. And at that point, I had no idea how right that thought of mine would end up being. Especially since at that point I didn’t even know the name Oikawa Tohru, let alone knowing Asuma Kousuke. But… The wheels were in motion, even then.

 By the end of 2016 I’d fully gotten into Haikyu. I was still wavering on my favourite character at that point, but leaning more and more towards Nishinoya (who in the end has stuck as my favourite, not that I think many people know that!), but the series itself in general had utterly won my heart. Yet, still, apart from the brief glimpses of images and clips I still knew very little about the stage play. Occasionally I’d see a gif or picture and marvel at how perfect everyone looked and how well they captured the characters but mostly I was just interested in the anime.

Then Kuroko no Basuke happened. And… That series would need a whole piece of writing for itself... For reasons I won’t go into here.  But this is when I saw images of the Kuroko no Basuke stage play. And this is where I caught my first sight of the person who was due to really set everything in motion. Kuroba Mario. Instantly blown away by how incredibly perfectly Mario depicted my golden boy Kise. I started looking into the stage and realised the production wasn’t far enough in to feature Akashi yet. For now, I still looked at the stage plays as something else that went on, but I didn’t really get involved in.

 But it was only a couple of months before this would all change.

 In that wonderfully complicated way that life likes to move in, I ended up making friends with someone who was a big fan of Mario. And, since they were a fan of both Kise and Oikawa, I ended seeing a little more of Kousuke too.

And then, quite suddenly I found myself looking more and more into Mario, and realising that actually, yes, I did adore him quite a lot. I also presented Kousuke to my dearest Mei, knowing that Oikawa is her favourite from Haikyu (well… Him and Hinata. So obviously once we got going Kenta would become pretty prominent, but we had a little way to go before that yet.)

Yep. The truth that I think Mei thinks I forget. I did originally present Kousuke to her as ‘her boy’. But me being the natural researcher and ever one to keep digging once I get interested in something, it didn’t take long before I was coming back like ‘uhhh…… so….?? Share?’ I’m lucky that she is much, much better at sharing than I am.

Within days both Mario and Kousuke were popping up everywhere I could possibly talk about them. My phone slowly filling up with images and gifs. First of them as Kise and Oikawa, and then slowly branching into other roles, and then of them themselves. Mario had charmed me completely. But I hadn’t quite realised how much impact Kousuke was having until about two weeks in. Incidentally it was my birthday that I decided I’d finally go tracking down the boys social media pages. It was still Mario I followed first on both Instagram and twitter, but Kousuke was immediately after that. What I hadn’t counted on was a sudden relapse of something I hadn’t had to think of for a while.

That bad year I mentioned in 2015? That was when my anxiety and OCD was at it’s peak. That was the year I let things get so bad, but that I was finally able to recognise that I needed help and, thankful to say, I got it. It was tough, but it was worth it to get the other side of it. I’d been free from those kinds of thinking, for the most part ever since I’d gotten into anime and manga. The odd spike thanks to Attack on Titan (…. Worst series to be into when you have anxiety disorder + a favourite character right?), but mostly I’d been good. Maybe focusing on anime characters was easier than focusing on real people. I guess it was.

 It was while I was quite happily scrolling through Kousuke’s twitter account (mostly with the help of google translate, my Japanese was extremely limited at that point), that it happened.

It’s hard to explain, as I guess most things are when it comes to matters dealing with how a mind works, but I remember that cold feeling creeping up on me. An old kind of fear that I’d used to live with constantly. And with it, the cogs in my brain working overdrive. A panic, realising this was a resurgence of something that had trapped me so long. My brain terrified of something, and it hurriedly trying to come up with ways to prevent it. I can’t speak more specifically because, even if at the time my brain thought it had something specific to fear, it usually is more abstract than that. Awful timing to happen on my birthday, huh? But. This time, I had the tools to deal with it. And, while it was scary, I was able to breathe and calm down and not let these intrusive thoughts take over. Within a couple of hours I was smiling, and kinda laughing a little. In a way it was my brain’s way of telling me THIS BOY!! VERY IMPORTANT!! MUST PROTECT!! So. I guessed there was no point denying how very much Kousuke had taken over my world by then. So I accepted it, with ever gaining relish.

 Now I often and quite happily declare Kousuke to be one of the very best things to have happened to me. One of my most prized possessions is my copy of his photobook, which my dearest Mei bought me for Christmas. It’s precious to me for many reasons. But mostly because it’s one item I can constantly count on to help manage my anxiety. It’s partly the distraction of focusing on something else, partly Kousuke’s smiling face and partly… Just that particular warm feeling I get from Kousuke. If things seem difficult to deal with, or I notice a spike in my anxiety, by the time I’ve made my way through Pop Step Jump I’m a little calmer. And feeling a little bit stronger.

 Kousuke makes me so happy, and I recognise and am so grateful for everything he does for his fans. I’m proud to be part of his fanbase, even if I can’t properly communicate with all of them (I promise, I’m learning as fast as I can!) Kousuke has one of the nicest, warmest and sweetest fanbases I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. You guys are so lovely. And I can’t thank you enough for how unendingly sweet you are to Kousuke. As someone who’s been in too many fanbases that like to tear their own idols to pieces, this is the most heart-warming place to be. My learning of Japanese has picked up at least tenfold since I started following him. From my stubbornness at still watching videos and interviews without subtitles, and of course Kousuke’s many live streams, I’ve found my understanding growing, even if it’s not exactly perfect. I’ve become bolder in my replies to Kousuke on twitter at including Japanese as well as English. I like to think he sees my improvement over time. From someone who could just about type ‘おはよう’ and ‘おやすみ’ to some basic sentences, I also like to think any mistakes I do make will make him smile as he sees me trying my best.

 I won’t say my anxiety never picks up again. I especially get concerned about missing live streams to the point I think I’ve accidentally made myself ill on occasion. This may sound selfish of me, but this is my inferiority complex at work, and the fear of not doing enough. Please be assured, the standards I set for myself are in no way standards I place on anyone else. I only EVER expect these things from myself, no one else. In fact, I’ll probably think you better than me no matter what. I always want to do as much as humanly possible for Kousuke. That’s probably the only way my anxiety manifests with Kousuke, which, if you’d known me in years past, is actually pretty impressive.

 It’s hard to sum up when I’ve already said so much, and yet so much still feels unsaid. I hope I’ve gotten across at least some of the love and adoration I have for Kousuke. Of how he came into my life, and made it better. How he’s made me stronger and happier in many ways. And how I hope to keep on supporting him, the best ways I know how to. I truly, truly hope I get to thank him in person one day (even if there’s no way I could possibly convey it all, but that’s okay). 

 大好き遊馬くん, ありがとうございます。

And thank you anyone who took the time to read this. ♥ Back to your regularly scheduled posts very soon! - Aka. 

[psychicmedium14]

What Your Astrological Sign Says About What Kind of Ex-Girlfriend You Are

Sure, you know what kind of girlfriend you are based on your zodiac sign, but what kind of ex are you? Read on to find out what the stars have to say about your breakup style. Aquarius: The Ex Who Doesn't Look Back: Honestly, PHEW, you're glad things are over now, because you were starting to feel a little cramped. You're super independent, Aquarius, and you need to feel like you have space to be who you want to be, or else you get antsy. You tend to not get bent out of shape after a breakup. After all, your witty conversational skills and charisma make everyone you meet feel super important, which makes it super easy for people to fall for you, HARD. But if someone bores you or can't keep up that signature Aquarius banter, you're out. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Finally booking that trip you've always wanted to talk about. You finally have all this time! What did you even do when you were dating someone? How did you even LIVE? Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You're out and about they walk by. They're super awkward about the whole thing, which you don't really understand, until you realize you were on a date with someone much hotter than your ex. Pisces: The Nice Ex: Selfless Pisces! You work too hard and are far too nice and trusting to everyone. Your friends are stoked for your break up. They're sick of watching your current boo treat you like any less than the queen that you are, and can't WAIT for you to find someone better. You're hella compassionate and kind, so you try to keep things as amicable as possible with your exes. But your sensitive side means that you also feel breakups pretty intensely. Maybe you didn't even love them! But the second you break up, you're left wondering Was this person my soulmate? Will I spend the rest of my LIFE ON THIS PLANET pining for them? Luckily the answer is no. Your kind, compassionate nature is like friggin' catnip for All the Hot Singles In Your Area and you are able to find new boos to take your mind off of things pretty easily. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Starting a poetry blog that goes viral. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: They start following your work and accidentally like something on your Instagram from a very chill 38 weeks ago. Aries: The Ex That Got Away: All your exes miss you immediately. Once you're no longer together, they realize just how much they missed that signature Aries wild-streak of spontaneity and confidence. Too bad that's not your problem anymore! It's not like you're sad that you guys broke up because you really miss them — it's more like you're a little insulted they didn't wanna hang around your greatness anymore? Whatever though, you're not bothered you tell yourself while toggling between the 17 OkCupid tabs you have open and swiping with abandon on Tinder. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Gong on a blind date within 24 hours of your breakup. Hey, why wait? Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: They "accidentally" (read: on purpose) run into you by school/work/that bar you always go to with your friends. It doesn't work and you see right through it though, so lmao. Taurus: The Chill Ex: You approach everything super logically, so once you figure out that you guys weren't going to spend the rest of your lives together, you no longer care. Your reliable and stable nature means you often stay friends with exes after the fact. While you may think nothing of it (practically speaking, you'd never date the same person twice. On-and-off-again relationships just don't make sense to you, time-wise), just know that every time you hang out as friends, they're running through your entire relationship in their head, wondering if you'll ever give them a second chance. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Shopping for a new wardrobe or curating some other aspect of your life to your typical Taurusian perfection Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You see them like, every day, after you become friends again and they won't STFU about their love life in front of you Trying to Make You Feel Something, but you're chill. Gemini: The On-and-Off-Again Ex: You're super adventurous and fearless so breakups are truly NBD to you...but sometimes maybe they should be? Your indecisive nature and charisma make you a perfect storm for on-again-off-again relationships, but you already know this. You can't help it if you've got a knack for starting organic conversation with anyone, including your ex! It's always good to be chill about breakups, but you gotta remember that sometimes they're for the best, especially when you could be gracing someone new with that signature Gemini charm. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Talking it out with a v. therapeutic vent sesh with your best girlfriends. You decompress best when surrounded by lots of love and verbal affirmations that you are indeed, much better than your ex, and much funnier. (You are.) Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You set up a coffee date later down the line to "catch up" AKA suss out how they're doing post-breakup and are they in a place where you should get back together again? You'll never know unless you ask! Cancer: The Ex That Blocks You on Facebook: I'm not gonna sugarcoat it: breakups hit you pretty hard since you tend to feel emotions very viscerally. And why shouldn't they? You're one of the most loyal and supportive people around, so if someone were to test that trust or commitment, yeah, you'd be pretty hurt. "I don't even care," you choke out between sobs while writing a very harshly worded email that you will never send (you didn't even put their email address in the recipient tab), partway out of fear you'd accidentally hit send and they'd see just how much this actually bothers you, and partway because you can't even admit to yourself how hurt you are. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Going through their tagged photos on Facebook/Instagram to see when/if they're dating somebody new, and WHO IS SHE AND WHAT DOES SHE HAVE ON YOU? Your friends eventually convince you to block them. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: Never, because you go way out of your way to avoid running into them of course. Leo: The Petty Ex: You're not mad at all. You actually don't even care at a— okay, you're a little mad. Maybe not mad, just a lil' insulted that you wasted your time with someone who wasn't as perfect as you. Ok, FINE, you're also really hurt that someone didn't see you for the star that you are. And yeah, it doesn't feel good that you were probably more into them than vice versa. You can't help it though, you're just a straight shooter who doesn't play games, so why play hard to get? It sucks to put yourself out there and have that met with anything but matching enthusiasm. You might try to overcompensate with coolness and try to remain friends, but eventually you realize you were never really friends in the first place. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Trying to make a mumblecore indie short film about your experiences together a la Adam from the last season of GIRLS for some sense of closure. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You invite them to your Broadway debut 20 years down the line, but you're not salty. It's just, like a light "f*ck you" move you know? Super casual. Virgo: The Ex That Can't Let Go: You look for some Greater Meaning in everything — methodically analyzing every move trying to learn from it. You vacillate between crying your eyes out, or thanking your lucky stars the universe hath delivered you from this fuccboi. You continue to go through your old message history looking for red flags after the fact, convinced if you could only find the turning point it would bring you some closure. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Shell-shocked, rocking back and forth whispering "I just don't get it." Your friends GTFO there after two days of trying to convince you everything will be okay. You know that, but you just gotta process stuff at your own pace. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You do a very calculated Hot Girl Pivot™ where you examine and reevaluate every aspect of your life to seem Cooler, Better, Faster, Stronger and broadcast it from all your social media channels until he's the very first viewer on all your Snapchat stories. Libra: The Friendly Ex: Since you tend to be non-confrontational, things usually get *pretty* bad for a breakup to even happen, which leads to a lot of unspoken bitterness for both parties. You'll go out of your way to be diplomatic and make sure everyone knows that you hold no ill will, but really, you'll never forgive them for wasting your time. No matter though! You're charming AF and hotties start falling into your orbit almost immediately after any breakup. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: If you're *really* shook, you go to law school or something. If you're only a little shook, you make a bunch of fire Spotify breakup playlists and waddle around in your PJs pitying yourself for exactly 1/7th of the time you were together, or until a new crush comes your way. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You see them all the time, because you're "friends" and you totally "don't care" that they're now dating a carbon copy of yourself at all haha, why? Scorpio: The Stone-Cold Ex: Damn, where do I start Scorpio? For starters, all your exes are scared of you. You know that right? You're real quick to call someone out and will not hesitate to bring up receipts from like, four tax seasons ago. And good luck to them if they hurt you, because you'll dedicate all your waking hours to getting them back. If an ex is lucky enough to escape your wrath, you'll just go straight for the freeze and cut off all communication with them forever. It's like you never existed. You deal with breakups about as well as you'd think, which is very intensely. You may seem tough on the outside, and you are pretty fearless, but you also tend to beat yourself up about them, wondering if you did something to chase them off/make things fall apart. The older you get, the more you realize, it's not always somebody's fault and that sometimes people just aren't a match, and breakups get easier and easier the older you get. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Flirting with the idea of hooking up with their best friend/roommate/boss to just really drive in that power play that you "won" the breakup. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: When you start parading around the fact that you're now hooking up with someone close to them. Spoiler: it doesn't feel good for any party involved. Sagittarius: The Ex Who Will Always Secretly Hope for Something More: You're so funny and witty that it's a little too easy for you to become friends with your exes after you breakup. Of course you don't mind though. You'll give a ton of lip service about how "you're just friends" till the ends of time, but at the same time, if they ever wanted to pursue something again, you'd sign up right away. But you'll never make the first (second) move. You're stubborn enough to not want to be the one to pursue an on-again-off-again dealio, but conveniently not stubborn enough to move on completely. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Setting your ex up with a friend just to prove how "totally over it" you are. You're not, and you finally realize this when they actually hit it off and you don't know how to backpedal and say you didn't mean for this to happen. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You see them on Tinder and it hits you that they're like, actively looking to date other people, which even though you'd been broken up for months, hurts you in ways you didn't realize you could be offended by? Haha. Nice. You consider moving away or getting really into cycling classes. You wind up doing neither, but it gets easier every time. Capricorn: The Glo-Up Ex: You're honestly stoked to be single again. What a great chance to meet new people and trade up for a hotter/smarter/funnier model. Sure, your friends might think this is a little cruel when you explain your lack of grieving period, but it works. Your ex was a little dull anyways, and they were always gonna disappoint you in one way or another. They probably just couldn't handle you. Sure, it hurts a little, but ultimately you're grateful for the chance to meet somebody who really gets you. And super grateful you don't have to pretend to like the same things anymore. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Dating somebody who is the total opposite of your ex, just to see what it's like. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You run into each other at a mutual friend's party and you don't even realize it until they text you about it later. Oops! Oh well. You remain unbothered.