#my boys came home <3< /div>
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When Grian enters the doorway of Scar’s base, he finds the man digging around in his chests, mumbling to himself. It’s a sight he’s walked in on multiple times before in the past, a scene that settles in Grian’s chest and leaves a sense of domesticity blanketing him. He watches for a few moments, if only to exist in the same space as the man he’s so terribly missed. Everyone had been gathered at spawn for the grand reveal of the object that’d allow for them to keep their inventories, and Grian had been so focused on it that he didn’t have the opportunity to give Scar a proper hello.
Hence why when the group split off to prep themselves for what will most certainly be a grueling fight with the ender dragon, Grian’s first stop is Scar. He himself doesn’t need to do that much prepping, already loaded with food, a water bucket, and a bow. He’s got a few potions on hand as well.
So in the doorway he stands, watching Scar with a pleased smile. His wings twitch behind him, wanting to wrap the man up in warm feathers and drag him back to his nest for some long overdue snuggles. Later, he reminds his bird brain. Instead, he allows himself a soft trill, the sound instantly making Scar pause in his movements.
Lifting his head up and turning around, forest green meets chocolate brown, and Scar’s face breaks out into a wide grin. “I was beginning to wonder if I’d get a little visit from my favorite bird,” he muses, prompting Grian to enter his base.
“Sorry for the wait then,” Grian returns, coming over to him. He checks Scar over, nodding in approval when he sees him fully decked out in diamond armor. If they had more time he might’ve been able to help Scar with enchantments, if only to keep him a bit more protected. But this is just as good—certainly an upgrade from the iron helmet.
Fully aware of Grian’s staring, Scar’s grin turns into a sly smirk. “Like what you see?” he hums, flexing an arm.
Grian laughs at him, moving to brush his hands over the shoulders of Scar’s chest plate. “It’s adequate.” It’s his turn to grin as he revives the old joke, earning a pout from Scar.
“Never gonna let me live that down, huh?” Scar murmurs, chuckling. “Should I shine it then? Make it really sparkle,” the vex hums in thought.
Pretending to think about it, Grian tilts his head. “Hm, it’s already plenty shiny. Any shinier and I might get distracted during the fight.” His hands drop down to Scar’s chest, remaining there.
Scar looks at him, still pouting. “You mean the handsome man wearing the armor won’t distract you?” There’s almost an edge of a whine in his voice as he replies, one that amuses Grian greatly.
“Oh he will,” he returns, wings curling around them, keeping them both in a feathery shield. “It’s been a while since he’s been around to distract me.” There’s a twinge of raw honesty in what Grian says, the ache of yearning sitting in his chest as he looks up at Scar.
A warm palm settles against Grian’s cheek, thumb running over his skin. Scar’s expression softens, eyes filling with the same yearning, the same depth of affection. “I guess we’ll be even then,” he speaks quietly, “because there’s a certain pretty bird that happens to be very distracting for me.”
Grian preens, a pleased coo sounding from him. He leans up to bump their noses together, pressing his forehead right against Scar’s. Scar chuckles, his other arm finding a place around his waist to pull Grian in closer. “We’re both going to end up being late to meet back up with the others,” Grian idly points out, although he makes no effort to pull away or move.
“I think making them wait an extra minute or two won’t hurt.” Scar smiles devilishly in that way of his that makes Grian huff. “Besides, you were the one who came to see me! Didn’t even give me the chance to pop in on you.” He’s teasing. “Did you miss me that much, G?”
Yes. “No,” Grian denies, “I wanted to make sure you had proper gear.”
Scar hums, though he doesn’t appear to believe Grian’s little fib a single bit. “‘course I do! I had a whole stack of diamonds just sitting around collecting dust.” He gives Grian’s waist a loving squeeze. “It’s a miracle I didn’t die while trying to make this armor.”
Grian laughs at that with a fond shake of his head. “There’s still time,” he jokes, earning a beautiful laugh from the man, one that makes his heart soar. His hand tangles itself in Scar’s hair to tug him down, and Scar is more than happy to follow through. Their lips press together in a warm kiss, one they’ve both been waiting for since Grian stood in his doorway. Grian’s body relaxes at the feeling of Scar’s lips on his own, moving in a rhythm that leaks with affection and longing. Scar is warm and soft but still so familiar and comforting; for a moment Grian thinks that all of the frustration of this world might’ve been worth it if he got to kiss Scar like this. It feels like waking up together, like crafting side by side, like falling against one another after a long exhausting day.
It feels like home.
A muffled bird noise spills from Grian’s throat, probably one of contentment that makes Scar laugh against his lips.
“I missed you too, G,” Scar sweetly confesses, pulling back just enough to look at him. Their breaths mix together, foreheads still touching.
Knowing that he never bothered to hide his true reason for coming to Scar, Grian looks up at him with a pout. “Next time you decide to take an extended mining trip, I’m coming with you,” he decides, because weeks without Scar while surrounded by endless sources of frustration was, simply put, hell. Having the rest of his flock nearby made it a little bit easier, but it did little to lessen the yearning. “The nest was too cold,” Grian quietly admits, voice just slightly above a whisper.
If possible, Scar’s expression only softens further, and he’s kissing Grian again. “Well we can’t have a cold nest, can we?” he hums, looking at Grian with a smile. “It’s against avian law, after all!”
Grian snorts with laughter, moving to pull Scar into a hug. “I don’t think the Poe Poe would be very happy about you breaking avian law.”
Scar tucks Grian against him, pressing his lips to the avian’s head. “A cold nest is more than enough to make me a wanted criminal!” he cries.
“Guess the only way to fix that is a warm nest and morning cuddles.”
“An amayzin’ idea there, G.”
“Oi!” Joel sticks his head into the doorway of Scar’s base. His sudden appearance startles the two, making Grian’s feathers fluff up when he looks over at Joel. “Quit your snogging and let’s go fight the dragon already!” he exclaims, impatience lacing his words. Turning around, he calls out, “You owe me five diamonds Jim!”
Jimmy yells something in reply, but Grian doesn’t care to hear it. He looks back at Scar, who’s snickering. “Guess that’s our cue.”
Scar wildly grins, “Let’s go show this dragon who’s boss.”
#mochi writes#scarian#hermitshipping#impossible smp#impossible smp spoilers#I don’t know how to tag this one whoops#anyways hi I just watched grian’s finale#I’m soooooo chill about everything that happened#my boys came home <3#so naturally I had to write a fluffy drabble
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☆ killah ☆

♫ "if i get you alone, under your skin and bone, imma try you on for size" the MAYHEM collection. now playing: killah.
[childhood friend! sunday x fem! reader] synopsis: you return home from uni after breaking up with your boyfriend, where your childhood friend awaits you with open arms... and no ulterior motives. wc: 2.0k cw: explicit smut. MDNI. sunday is a bit of a freak. implied obsessive and possessive behavior.
“massive day for sunday oak,” kakavasha jokes when you break the news to your friends back home that you finally broke up with your awful boyfriend.
your relationship with sunday, your childhood best friend, had become… strained, for some reason, after you’d told him that you were in relationship with someone you’d met on campus. things were still tense from you choosing to go to a different college despite the fact that you’d both been accepted into the same prestigious one that he’s currently attending, but this seemed to be the nail in the coffin. sunday still texted you frequently, of course, but you did notice how he would never like or comment on a post or close friends story that featured your then-boyfriend in it.
he’s not the type of person to do something without purpose, after all.
kakavasha, someone you’d both met in high school who is a friend to you (to sunday, too, not that either will ever admit it) hounds you constantly about sunday’s supposed crush on you.
“he’s being passive-aggressive.” the smugness in his voice somehow always manages to carry through the phone speaker. “i don’t know why you won’t admit to yourself that he’s down bad for you.”
“he’s not,” you insist, even though you know somewhere in the back of your mind, that sunday has always looked at you in a way that kakavasha and veritas never have.
despite your feigned denial and ignorance, though, you’re a bit nervous to be home for the summer. you’d broken up with your ex at the beginning of the semester, meaning that a solid five months have passed since then. you feel like you’ve moved on and are ready for whoever life sends your way next.
a mindset and shift in your demeanor that sunday will be able to pick up on immediately.
sunday knows you better than anyone— undoubtedly, even better than you know yourself. it can get uncomfortable, at times, being under his scrutinizing, all-seeing gaze and being handled as meticulously as one of the projects assigned to him by his adoptive father as a test to see if he is indeed a worthy heir.
maybe you are a personal project to him. he’s always so careful, so calculated in his interactions with you that it leaves you feeling slightly uneasy, but only after the fact. no, in the moment, you’re always blinded by your fondness and long-time affection for him, something which he knows. which he uses to his advantage.
so, yes, you do play dumb when it comes to sunday. you know how he is, what he’s capable of— you’ve been witness to his colder, crueler side countless times, have exchanged your fair share of wide-eyed side glances with robin— and you know that if show even an ounce of interest, he’ll seriously pursue you, and he’ll execute it so flawlessly that you won’t even realize what hit you until you’re already nestled deep within his grasp.
you know this, and yet.
you agree to go over to his house (mansion, really; all these years, and you still get lost in dewlight pavilion if you’re not with sunday or robin) the day after your flight lands. his more questionable behaviors aside, you do love sunday dearly, and you do want to see him again, especially now that things aren’t tense between you anymore.
a foolish thing to do, in hindsight. why do you never trust your instincts when he’s involved?
he’s been driving you insane all day. his touches linger, but not nearly long enough for you to actually be able to call him out on it. you’ll think you catch something needy in his gaze, but when you do a double-take, he’s the perfect picture of innocence, listening to you attentively, as always.
sunday has always been attractive, you’d be an idiot to try and convince yourself otherwise. but you’ve always been hesitant out of fear of ruining your friendship with him— that, and because of the depth of his feelings for you.
you should know that he’s stringing you along, working you up on purpose. he’s always known how to read you, carefully tracing your lines with his finger as if you’re sheet music detailing his favorite song, committing your notes to memory and playing you so masterfully, like he was born to do nothing else but ensure that you are his finest piece of work.
and as you’ve always known, you’re already in too deep by the time your brain catches up to what he’s been scheming; you’ve got him pushed back against his headboard while you straddle his lap, hands tangled in his hair as you kiss him senseless. his hands are at your waist, fingers digging into your skin as he keeps trying to pull you impossibly closer to him. his mouth is pliant beneath yours, following your lead and movements with small moans and gasps slipping out in between.
he trails after you when you pull back, so you place a hand against his chest to keep him in place. it snaps him out of it enough for him to open his eyes. he looks absolutely debauched with his blown pupils and puffy lips, and you try to ignore what the sight does to the heat building between your thighs.
“is this—” you clear your throat. “is this really okay?”
his eyes are locked onto your lips as you speak. “why wouldn’t it be?” he asks back.
“you— you haven’t done anything before, sunday,” you say. “i don’t want you to regret it.”
he finally meets your eyes at that. one hand removes itself from your waist and comes up to cup your cheek, his thumb stroking it gently.
“i could never regret you, dove,” he whispers, and you feel your face flush bright red at the nickname.
you swallow thickly. the devotion will take some getting used to. “are you sure?”
he drags you toward him, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. “of course,” he murmurs against them.
you adjust yourself on his lap, leaning into him fully, your chest pressing against his. he sucks in a shaky breath at the contact, his hand finding its way to your waist again. “you’ll let me know if it’s too much, right?”
he nods weakly, distracted. when you raise an eyebrow, he mutters out, “yes, i will.”
“okay,” you say, satisfied.
and then you descend on him again, lips meeting in a mess of tongue and desperation. you hike the skirt of your dress up and begin to slowly rock your hips back and forth against his clothed erection, and the groan that leaves his throat sends a rush of heat shooting down your spine, pooling in the pit of your stomach.
after a few minutes, he pulls away just enough to hiss out a desperate, “please.”
nodding, you lean back and begin fumbling with his belt. once it’s off, you pull his pants as far down his legs as you can without removing yourself from him completely. his boxers are soaked through, and you feel yourself swallowing again in anticipation as you reach inside of them. he jolts again when your hand wraps around his girth, another whine slipping out of his lips as he involuntarily bucks into your hand. with your other hand, you begin moving his boxers down his thighs as well, and pull his cock free.
he’s on the slimmer side, but he’s definitely longer than your ex— the only person you’ve ever been intimate with. you might have some trouble taking him fully, but judging from the amount of pre already dripping down his cock— and the mess between your own legs, dripping down your thighs— it might be able to slip in just fine.
huffing out a shaky sigh of your own, you hurriedly remove your own panties, tossing them somewhere to the side of the bed. you shift upward, carefully lining his cock up with your hole. you both groan a little bit when his tip brushes against your entrance.
you place a hand on his shoulder and rub your thumb in circles against his collarbone and, voice lilting, ask, “are you ready?”
“yes,” he breathes out.
slowly, you start sinking down onto his cock. a soft whine escapes you as his tip stretches you on its way in, a sigh of relief leaving you when it slips in and you start taking in his shaft.
sunday’s grip is near-bruising as you descend fully, and a strangled moan leaves him when you sit down on him completely. a choked gasp leaves you when his tip hits something deep within, a part of you that’s never been reached before.
he leans forward and presses his forehead to your shoulder. you gently card a hand through his hair, letting both him and yourself adjust.
when he leans back again, you place both your hands on his shoulders.
“i’m going to move now,” you say, “that okay?”
“please,” he whines again, and you giggle and press a sweet kiss to his lips.
you move yourself up and off of him just enough so that his tip is barely leaving your entrance before you slam back down again, taking him at a fast pace.
whatever control he was trying to maintain over himself unravels quickly, and the whines that leave him stoke the flames burning in the pit of your stomach even more, knowing that you’re responsible for picking him apart like this. your own whines mingle with his, as each bounce has his tip slamming into that sensitive spot again and again, pushing you toward the edge faster than your ex or any toy ever has.
he’s getting close— you can feel him twitching inside you, and his whines are escalating into deep, loud moans that he tries to muffle by burying his face into your chest. you’re not quite there yet, but you’re not too worried about coming today; making his first time enjoyable is enough to satisfy you.
as if sensing your resolve, though, sunday removes a hand from your waist— something you don’t realize until his cool fingers are prodding at your clit. your hips jerk forward at the sudden contact, sucking in a sharp breath as he begins kneading it.
his movements are a bit sloppy at first, but he’s always been a quick learner, especially when it comes to you. when one particular motion has you crying out suddenly, he’s pressing harder against that spot and massaging it faster, bringing you closer to your high.
your movements have become erratic and your walls are fluttering when he tries to speak again, voice hoarse. “i— i’m—”
“inside,” you moan out, the word slurring as you feel yourself hanging on by a thread. “‘s okay.”
sunday gives a few a more thrusts before one more loud whine rips itself from his throat. he gives one last aborted jerk as he unloads into you, and the warmth that fills you pushes you over edge at last, and somehow, even through his own haze, he continues rubbing against your clit as you ride out your high.
eventually, you slump forward, collapsing against his chest as you catch breath and bring your racing heart back down. a hand comes up to cradle your hair gently, and he presses a tender kiss to your temple.
now clear-headed, you sigh, poking a finger into his rib. “you did all of that on purpose, didn’t you?”
he laughs, innocent enough if you didn’t know him as well as you do.
“whatever are you talking about?” he asks. he pulls you back by the hair gently, gazing into your eyes. there’s mischief and something a bit darker in them. “you came onto me.”
you roll your eyes at him. “what am i gonna do with you?”
he takes your hand in his, bringing it up to his lips and brushing your knuckles against them.
“i can think of a few things.”
#just hornyposting today apparently#my bad guys#your honor my client was ovulating#anyways welcome home sunday <3 i havent written for him in three months#the evil blonde has been vanquished (for now)#sunday came home to show all these soccer guys who really runs this blog#the boys had their fun now it's real wife hours#anyways being sunday's first time would be insane#he's NEVER letting you go#it's for life now#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail x you#hsr x you#hsr smut#hsr sunday x reader#sunday x reader#hsr sunday x you#sunday x you#hsr sunday#ceru.writes#ceru.nsfw
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i can finally die happy .
#TAT#. EVERYONE PLEASE CHEER THIS AWFUL MAN HAS EVADED MY PULLS FOR A WHOLE YEAR#god ……#:’))) my beautiful angel boy he makes me so happy#took me 50 pulls but then he was good and came home <3 even managed to get an extra copy ….#my rolls were actually REALLY good this time around#hold on . need to show u#ari noises ✩
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Hi, I need more cowboy x punk stuff after the suggestive boots, I also kinda wanna see them slowly infect each other's style since they look like similar sizes

I'm never gonna pass up the chance to draw Noah wearing Martin's clothes ;)
#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#illustration#digital drawing#original art#my ocs#original character#oc#Noah#You're right#They're pretty similar in size#Martin has about a head on Noah and he's a little wider so his shirts are a little big on him#which Noah takes full advantage of#Noah steals a shirt from him almost every time he's home#which Martin knows but never says anything about#Martin is a little more specific about his looks so i don't think he'd willingly wear anything of Noah's#Not that Noah would ever leave behind anything for him to keep#but this made me think about Martin prying a piece off an old chain or something Noah left laying around after replacing one on his bike#and sticking it either in the band of his hat or on his car keys#Thank you so much for the ask!!#I'm so glad people are enjoying the boys#i'm sorry i didn't have time to fit Martin in this one#but the punk and the cowboy are incredibly dear to my heart#so there will be plenty more where they came from <3
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karlsruhe (h)
#sv darmstadt#football#pitchside tag#from yday ⚜️ not on here much rn cos of personal reasons hope everyone’s doing well just posting pitchside stuff and fucking off again x#GREAT game. floodlights friday at home is always a banger and my sister tagged along with me this game#i love my sister and football more than anything else in the world so great combo#got there as the ground opened and we walked around a bit had some curly chips and she had a bratwurst#sitting in the nord this game which had pretty good atmosphere compared to nord most days (me and thangachi were being very loud tbf)#read the monthly programme + the ultras’ programme before the game started#game itself was brilliant. defensively solid midfield was picking everything up attack was on one. should’ve been 2-0 up at the half#did get a bit nervy cos i was scared of 1-1 but ksc only had abt two good chances really#and then 2-0 and 3-0 came very fast :)#all my beautiful boys scored. isac lidberg FUSSBALLGOTT kilian corredor the CHILL FRENCHMAN and mey papela MY SON (first goal!!!)#frase was everywhere tho he’s really had a great few games. energy is there and he’s not afraid to get stuck in#me and thangachi might have lost our voices. was amazing and the boys danced with the süd at the end 🥺#she said it was karma for the group of teenage karlsruhe fans on the train there who were being quite annoying LMAO#i will take it!#also there was a svd against sexism thing that was also selling rly cool shirts i didn’t get one but it was nice to see#we were also early enough to see the team bus arriving. thangachi made accidental eye contact with isac who she said ‘did not smile#and looked like he was in the zone.’ i made accidental eye contact w luca marseiler (who i have met before) and he smiled + waved#life rly is calmer when ur not online looking at angry football takes 24/7. i’m having fun supporting spurs/lilien despite the horrors 🫶🏾#thangachi = little sister in tamil btw. my kutty chellam#rahul.txt
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"I love you, too! Now I'm all blushin'..."
#I think I've made gifs of this interview before but I rewatched it tonight and ahhhhhhh lover boy#my mom was like 'WHY is his hair like that' LEAVE HIS GUST DYE JOB ALONE!!!#philip seymour hoffman#psh#*#all in good time my angel came home <3
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Most of my sinus infection has cleared up besides the occasional cough and irritated throat but now this ear infection.... everything hurts can I please have a break before I have to go back to work just a day without pain so I can clean up my sicknest without feeling like ass
#i live with my parents but my mom is having a horrible flair up of RA so she's bedbound and can't help me at all and dad is the only one#the only one working atm so he's not doing anything besides that#its just a little frustrating because whenever mom is sick from her flare ups or if dad gets the sniffles im like#I'm like what can i do for you are you comfortable do you need anything can i make you food let me clean up etc#but when i go down for 3 days of being visibly miserable everything i ask is the world#ask dad to pick up my perscription but god forbid i ask him to do any other task on the way home that involves making 2 SEPARATE LOCATIONS#ita fine hes just. idk#plus mom has her RA flare up and idk#it just feels like nobody in this house is particularly sympathetic when im feeling miserable but im ALWAYS sympathetic when they are#the first 2 days i was doing nothing but sleeping or rolling in pain in my room and no one came to check in on me to see how i was doing#then yesterday my mom says shes taking us both into urgent care but leaves without me in the morning when i was too sick to wake up when she#called for me.#she was like I just really was in so much pain and you didnt get up and i wanted to go asap and i called you#anyway so because i was so sick i couldnt wake up i had to drive myself to urgent care which is also fine im a big boy#anyway. circumstances or whatever. im also real salty bc ive felt like shit for like 4 days
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#Creepy chatter#My yeehaw school required every one of us to be musical little babies#You could spot the choir kids bc they never were hauling instrument cases#And we had like monthly concerts since every student was guaranteed to be in band choir or orchestra#I remember my mom heavily suggesting I pick smth small like a flute on instrument day#And I came home with a trombone as big as me like :3#I could only practice at school tho lmao...my poor mom was only thinking of our neighbors in the building#Then I ended up doubling up w french horn after riding as 1st chair trombone for a year and a half#I was 1st chair frenchie for the rest of middle school but I think trombone was more fun#French horn is definitely prettier to me though#String instruments have never made sense to me but boy howdy can I toot
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next move; m | jjk

pairing: jungkook x reader
word count: 13.7k
tropes: hockeyplayer!jungkook, richgirlie!oc, college!au, fwb, brother's best friend
rating: 18+
warnings: alcohol consumption, lots of teasing, jk hooking up with someone else 🤢, oc goes a bit insane <3, smoking (ew), angry koo 😠, messy blow job, spit, cum on boobies, gagging, multiple orgasms, cum play, dick slaps on face n pussy, doggy, overstimulation, dirty talk, eating out, hair pulling, mirror sex, doggy, a few spanks, sum butt stuff, oc is addicted to shopping 🫂 (we both need help), pretends to help with uni stuff just to get dick, naughty thoughts abt jk at dinner with friends??, vulnerable oc <3, proud jk <3
summary: pov: you’ve spent so long pushing jungkook away, but now you’re the one trying to pull him back in.
a/n: i hope this feeds ur tummies well ! 😋
masterlist
⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒
“What is wrong with you?”
These being the first words Taehyung directs at you when you enter the kitchen at 9 in the morning makes you want to claw his eyes out and head back to bed again.
“I’d fight you if I wasn’t sleepy right now,” you mutter as you shove past him to get to the coffee machine.
“No, I’m being for real,” Taehyung says, inspecting you through critical eyes.
“I’m not wearing make-up. Get over it.”
“It’s not that,” he presses. “You’ve been acting strange the past few days.”
He catches you off-guard with that. You can’t think of a lie fast enough to cover up the fact that you’ve been kinda dumped by his best friend and are no longer fuck buddies, hard times, so you blink a few times to keep your composure.
Your brain, struggling to function at this hour, lands on the most groundbreaking response: “Huh?”
“You didn’t want chicken when I asked if I should bring you some yesterday.” Taehyung crosses his arms, leaning against the counter.
“I already ate when you called,” you quickly – maybe too quickly? You don’t know – defend yourself as you watch the coffee stream into your mug.
“Right. Tell me one time – just one – where you’ve turned down chicken.” He raises an eyebrow. “By the way, I still got you some. It’s in the fridge. But I knew something was up, because you never-”
“Wait, really?” you cut him off, perking up. “You got me chicken?”
You rush to the fridge, flinging the door open. There isn’t much in there to begin with, so it’s easy to spot your beloved meal. You grab it and get it ready for the microwave.
Taehyung completely ignores your excitement over the food and continues his questioning.
“You didn’t react when I switched one of your reality tv shows for something else the other day.”
Did he? You don’t even remember that happening.
“You came home after a long day. I was just being a sweet sister,” you deflect, waving him off.
“Point is – I can tell when my baby sister is sad. And I don’t need you to feign indifference for me, because it’s okay not to be okay,” he says, gentle. “And I wish you’d come to me about whatever this is to make you feel better, because, I don’t know, I thought that’s what we’ve been doing as siblings.”
Your heart squeezes.
He just wants to comfort you. Be there for you. And it clearly pains him that you’ve been keeping this from him.
“No, yeah, I know, it’s just.” God, you hate this. Having to lie to him. “It’s honestly not that serious, Tae. I’m just being dramatic about it, you know how I am.” You try to laugh it off, but he doesn’t let it deceive him.
“It’s about a boy, isn’t it?”
You need to tweak your acting skills. And your reactions too, because why did you look away after he asked you that?
“A boy?” You stretch the word out in an exaggerated drag to make his inquisition sound ridiculous. “There’s no boy in my life.”
“If I find out Eunwoo is causing trouble, I’ll-”
“God, no.” You shake your head vehemently. “He’s fine. He’s not doing anything.”
You retrieve the chicken from the microwave and set it next to your coffee. A questionable breakfast choice, but right now, comfort food is comfort food.
“Want some?” you offer, grabbing your chopsticks.
Taehyung sighs deeply, shaking his head. His lips press into a thin line, but there’s no anger – just concern softening his features. “Wanna talk about it?” He pauses, voice dropping lower. “Who do I have to fight?”
Your stupid best friend, who walked out on me because, apparently, he doesn’t like it when I’m with other boys and was so dramatic about it, but I lowkey do understand him because I don’t like seeing him with other girls too but I can’t tell him because I don’t want him to know that I care and maybe everything is my fault but I am sad and upset and I can’t tell you anything about it because you’d hate me for it.
You keep these thoughts to yourself though and bite into a piece of chicken instead.
“Tae, no.”
“To both of my questions?”
“Mhm-hmm,” you answer with your mouth full.
His shoulders slump in defeat.
Placing your chopsticks down, you step forward and wrap your arms around him.
“You’re an amazing brother, Tae,” you mumble against his chest. “And I promise that I’m doing fine. You’d know if I wasn’t. I think I’m just getting my period soon, honestly. I’ve been hating everything and everyone lately.” You squeeze him tight. “But I love you.”
“I love you,” he replies, resting his chin on your head. “You’d come to me if you needed me, right?”
“Of course. I love to annoy you about my problems.”
You feel his chuckle rumble through his chest.
“You’re coming to dinner with us after the game, right?”
You draw you head back slightly, peering up at him.
“Define us.”
Taehyung’s brows knit together.
“Like, everyone.”
You so don’t want to see Jungkook. It’s been a week since he left you confused in your room.
Detangling yourself from Taehyung, you shoot him an unimpressed pout. “I don’t know if I’m in the mood for that many people.”
“I’m not gonna let you lock yourself up in your room, ___,” he says, a slight edge creeping into his voice. “You can bedrot another day.”
He’s right – you probably should socialise a little more. And with so many people around, you might not even notice Jungkook’s presence.
“I’ll come,” you relent defeatedly, picking up your tray with breakfast. “Good luck with the game.” You reach up on your tippy toes to ruffle his hair with your free hand, earning an exasperated groan from him.
~
So, when you thought you could just ignore Jungkook at dinner, you failed to consider one crucial detail – the universe lives to humble you. Because, of course, out of all the empty seats, he had to take the one right next to you. Rookie mistake. Amateur behaviour. A tragic miscalculation on your part.
Now, you’re stuck playing the world’s most intense game of Pretending He Doesn’t Exist, which, unfortunately, is pretty difficult when he’s breathing in your general direction.
“Can you guys believe that I got a C for my essay?” Seokjin announces after chomping down a big piece of meat.
“Was it the one with the ducks?” Jungkook questions.
“Yeah, I was so excited to hand it in ‘cause I had so much fun writing, and then I get a C.” Seokjin tilts his head in remorse. “I was at a Lotte World parking lot when I got the notification, and it felt like someone stole my firstborn. I hope that never happens to me, I don’t think I could go through the emotions a second time. Honestly, not even the bumper cars could distract me after that.”
“Sure you don’t wanna sign up for drama class?” Taehyung teases. “You’d be such an asset to it.”
“I’m so close to doing it.”
“Wait, you wrote an essay about ducks?” you ask.
“Not just about ducks, silly,” Seokjin explains. “I wrote an essay on whether someone would rather fight 100 duck-sized horses or 1 horse-sized duck. You know, deep stuff like answering questions if it is morally better to fight one large opponent or many small ones.”
“What would the world do without you, Jin,” Yoongi chimes in.
“I’d choose one horse-sized duck, I think,” Eunji says, who thankfully sits next to you, so you’re not completely surrounded by people who you dislike (yes, you might’ve forced her to come with you – she wanted to study in the library, but you dragged her here with the promise of showering her with your never-ending love).
“But a duck so big is scary, no?” you ponder, tapping your chopsticks against your mouth as you think.
Listening in on your conversation, Jungkook says, “The horse-sized duck would be easier.”
You frown, turning to him. “That thing would be massive, and it’s a duck. Ducks are unpredictable.”
“Okay, but 100 duck-sized horses would overwhelm you,” he argues. “You’re assuming they’re just gonna stand there like cute little ponies. What if they’re really aggressive? They’d be all over you, biting, kicking. That’s chaotic.”
“How would you manage fighting a huge duck, though? I don’t see that happening,” you scoff.
“I’m not saying it wouldn’t be hard, but at least it’s just one thing to focus on. It’s straightforward.” Jungkook leans back, dragging his gaze over your face before he says, “But of course you’d prefer the more chaotic solution.”
You raise your eyebrows. “What are you on about?”
You’re talking about ducks and horses. Or so you thought.
Jungkook shrugs. “Nothing. I just think your decision is stupid.”
His eyes don’t waver, and you don’t back down either, because what the hell? Jungkook’s picking a fight over nonsense and has the audacity to glare at you like you personally offended him. His brows are drawn tight, frustration evident in the sharpness of his expression.
As you glare back, you can’t stop your brain from taking an unexpected detour to memories in which Jungkook wore a similar expression. On top of you, a little sweaty, cheeks flushed and – oh my god, you feel the heat rush to your cheeks and swiftly turn away.
“You’re annoying,” you mumble under your breath, picking up your chopsticks again.
Where did these thoughts come from? Do you miss him? It’s been one week. You need a distraction.
"See how riveting my essay topic is?” Seokjin chimes in, pointing his chopsticks at the two of you. “A C is criminally underappreciated.”
“I don’t think anyone can get under ___ skin like Jungkook,” Taehyung chuckles, placing more meat onto your plate.
“Oh no, don’t worry, you still take the first place,” you quip.
“Don’t say that too loud. Jungkook’s too competitive.”
“He’s a mini version of you.” You turn to Jungkook when you say it, scrunching your nose to display your dismay.
“There’s nothing mini about Jungkook,” Yoongi interjects.
The boys laugh while Eunji and you choke on your food.
“Okay, gross?” Eunji coughs.
“What? Have you not seen his muscles? He’s a big guy,” Seokjin defends, eyes wide as he studies Jungkook’s physique. “That’s no secret.”
“That’s why Sooyoung wants him again,” Jimin teases with a wicked grin stretching across his face.
“Oh, fuck off.” Jungkook kicks him under the table. “I said we’re not talking about this.”
At the mention of a name that rings a bell but you can't quite place it yet – one Jungkook clearly doesn’t want brought up – you perk up. “Not talking about what?”
It’s silent next to you.
Jungkook tenses, his posture stiff, the only giveaway a rough, forced clearing of his throat.
One game. You miss one game, and apparently, all the drama unfolds without you.
“You should’ve been there, ___,” Jimin drawls, eyes twinkling with mischief. “His ex was practically his personal cheerleader.”
Your brows lift as you turn to Jungkook. “Sooyoung, huh?”
You never got the chance to meet Jungkook’s ex. He was dating her during your senior year of high school, and they broke up while you were still in school.
His jaw tightens, but he doesn’t look at you. Instead, he focuses way too hard on his plate, shoving a piece of meat into his mouth like it’s the most interesting thing in the world and then finishing his beer in a few, big sips.
Jimin, on the other hand, is thriving on the attention. “Oh, yeah,” he hums. “Front-row seat. Didn’t take her eyes off him.”
At that, Jungkook kicks him again, harder this time. “Can you not?”
“Oh, come on, man. It was cute.”
You tilt your head, watching Jungkook’s reaction. “And you didn’t like that?”
His eyes finally flick to yours, the slight curve of his mouth betraying him. “I didn’t say I didn’t like it, I just don’t want to talk about it.”
“She waited outside the locker room for him,” Jimin continues.
You hold back a roll of your eyes. You don’t care. You don’t care at all.
“Did she?” Eunji fuels the fire with her excited question.
“She said hi. That’s it,” Jungkook mutters.
Jimin snorts at Jungkook’s reply. “Man, that’s not what I saw.”
“And you,” Jungkook directs at Jimin. “You were eye fucking her friend the entire time, so don’t act all high and mighty when you could barely keep your hands to yourself.”
“Sue me!” Jimin exclaims. “Yeah, I do think her friend’s hot, lock me up for it. I need her ig handle or something. I wanna see her again.”
“You’re both hopeless,” you comment, nails tapping against your glass.
“Hey, if she’s hot, she’s hot.” Jimin shrugs, grinning from ear to ear. “You can’t blame me for appreciating the view.”
Yoongi gives him a pointed look. “I’m pretty sure you’ve been ‘appreciating’ the view from every girl in the restaurant for the last hour.”
Jimin laughs loudly, clearly unbothered. “Guilty as charged.”
“What else is new?” Eunji asks. “Besides Seokjin thinking being unhinged will get him an A in his philosophy class, Jungkook having an over-attached ex, and Jimin being a total playboy? Anything else exciting happened this week?”
“I bought a blind box today,” you announce. “And got upset because I didn’t get the one I wanted.”
“The sonny angel figures?” Jungkook asks casually – way too casually.
His tone is so easy, so natural, that for a split second, you forget, just like he forgot. You almost answer just as effortlessly, almost fall into the usual rhythm of conversation with him. But then it hits you—the sharp, perfectly timed reminder that you’re pissed at him.
So instead, you hesitate, fingers tightening around your glass. “Yeah,” you say, a little clipped “Those.”
“I say you stop spending so much money for dust-collecting shit,” Tae comments, and you don’t even have the chance to defend yourself, because Seokjin calls him out for his own questionable spending habits.
While they bicker, you giggle at their antics, distracted for a moment. You reach to dip your dumpling into the sauce, but just as your fingers hover above the dish, you brush hands with Jungkook, who was doing the same.
You kick his hand with yours, expecting him to pull back, but he doesn’t budge.
“Do you ever stop being annoying?” you ask.
“Not when the person I’m annoying is you.”
“You gonna be like this all night?” Your hand sinks, touching the table. “I thought you were mad and would want to ignore me,” you say, much quieter now, even though everyone else is too caught up arguing whether Taehyung’s fifa pack spendings are justified.
“Weren’t you trying to do the same?”
Well, yeah. You were trying to ignore him – that was the sole reason why you even came – but you somewhere along the way, you veered off that plan, and now here you are.
“I guess you’re just too pretty for me to ignore.”
Jungkook freezes at that. You use the opportunity to nudge his hand aside and dip your food into the sauce.
“Funny, didn’t seem to be a problem when you were texting that dude next to me the other day.”
Your chewing slows. The words hit exactly where he intended, sharp and precise, a reminder of exactly why he’s pissed in the first place.
The conversation around you carries on, oblivious, but between you and Jungkook, the tension is suffocating.
You pull away completely, shifting in your seat so your legs are angled away from him and into Eunji’s direction.
Ignoring him is easier, less of a headache – and less of a heartache – than acknowledging his existence.
~
Later that night, you drown yourself in reality tv, letting the mindless drama fill the living room and keep your thoughts from wandering to the interactions you had with Jungkook tonight, because you really need a break from that boy.
You and Eunji had left the restaurant before the boys, her excuse being that she wanted to study, and yours being that you’d had done enough socialising for the day and it was time to go back home. Yeah, you do realise that you have a self-destructive tendency to isolate when things get difficult.
So, here you are, curled up on the couch, journaling about feelings and situations and –
Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.
You freeze, pen hovering above the paper as the sound of the front door code being punched in echoes from outside. The lock clicks, and the door swings open.
A familiar head of dark hair peeks inside first, followed by annoyingly familiar second one.
“You’re still up?” Taehyung asks, shrugging off his jacket and toes off his shoes.
“Tae,” you say slowly, looking at Jungkook. “Why is he here?”
“Figured we’d hang for a bit more. Play some fifa together.”
“You figured?” You turn to Tae with a deadpan expression.
Taehyung shrugs. “He looked sad.”
“I didn’t look sad,” Jungkook mutters, finally stepping inside and shutting the door behind him.
“You looked all emo when everyone got up to leave,” Taehyung says.
“Whatever.” Jungkook rolls his eyes and heads towards the kitchen, like this is his house now.
You exhale through your nose, pressing your fingers to your temple. “Do we look like a halfway house for emotionally constipated men?”
Jungkook’s voice calls out from the kitchen. “I can hear you.”
“Good.”
“Please try and act civil while I go change,” Taehyung pleads, already disappearing down the hallway.
Jungkook emerges a second later, settling onto the couch, a glass of water in his hand. His tatted fingers wrap around it, long and steady, as he takes a sip. You watch the way his Adam’s apple bobs, the way his throat moves, how the tiniest droplet of water escapes before his tongue swipes it away – completely unbothered. Casual. Like he isn’t taking up too much space in your head already.
“Headache from all that beer?” you ask, trying – hoping – that you sound unaffected by whatever it is about him that’s making your stomach flip.
He exhales, tipping his head back against the couch, stretching his neck just enough to make it unfair. The angle sharpens his jaw line.
His gaze flickers to you. “Something like that.”
Jungkook looks at you. Really looks at you.
His eyes drag over your bare legs, stretched out in tiny shorts that are basically just suggestions of clothing. They hesitate on the curve of your thighs, the hem barely covering anything, before sliding up to the delicate strap of your camisole, the curve of your shoulder. His fingers tighten around the glass just enough for you to notice.
You meet his gaze, unblinking.
Jungkook’s fingers twitch.
You smirk, stretching deliberately, arching your back slightly as you reposition yourself.
And then – his eyes flick downward, landing on the open journal beside you.
You don’t think anything of it at first – until his brows furrow slightly, head tilting as he squints.
“Wait,” he mutters, leaning forward. “Did I just see my name in there?”
Your stomach drops.
Panic sets in at lightning speed.
You slam the journal shut so fast it’s borderline violent.
“Mind your business.”
Jungkook blinks, then grins, slow and smug. Oh, you hate him.
“There is literally nothing for you to see.”
“Oh, but there was something,” he muses, stretching an arm along the back of the couch like he isn’t about to drive you insane. “You wrote about me?”
You cross your arms. “What if I did?”
“Depends,” he says, just momentarily allowing his gaze to drop to your chest. “What exactly are you writing about me?”
Jungkook’s smirk deepens, eyes flicking between you and the journal.
“You’re acting awfully guilty right now,” he taunts, shifting slightly, his thigh pressing against yours.
“Because you’re being nosey.”
“No, because you’re hiding something.”
You roll your eyes, gripping the journal tighter. “You’re not that interesting.”
He hums, tilting his head. “Then lemme see.”
“Absolutely not.”
It happens so fast you barely have time to react. One second, Jungkook is sitting there, all relaxed and smug. The next, he’s lunging forward, reaching for the journal with one hand, the other bracing against the couch to trap you in place.
“Jungkook—stop!” you shriek, twisting away, holding the journal out of his reach.
But he’s relentless.
He shifts closer, practically caging you in, his body warm and solid against yours. His arm brushes your bare thigh as he reaches again, fingers grazing the cover. You twist further, laughing, but the movement only makes things worse—your back presses into the cushions, and suddenly, he’s right there, hovering over you, weight balanced between his knees and one hand pressed into the couch beside your head.
The laughter dies in your throat.
Because now it’s just you and him, tangled up, breathing the same air. His face is inches from yours, the heat of his body seeping into your skin, the scent of his cologne mixed with something distinctly him. His gaze flickers downward – just for a second – but it’s enough. Enough for you to feel the shift. Enough for the teasing to suddenly feel like something else entirely.
Jungkook swallows.
Your heart is in your throat.
His gaze drops to your lips.
You freeze.
His fingers tighten slightly where they rest near your hip. The journal is still caught between you, forgotten, and for the first time, neither of you moves to break the moment.
Until –
A door creaks open down the hallway.
You both jerk back at the same time.
Jungkook moves first, clearing his throat as he drops back onto the couch, running a hand through his hair like that’ll somehow erase the past ten seconds. You sit up just as Taehyung strolls back in, glancing between the two of you with mild suspicion.
“Did you guys kill each other yet?”
“Nearly,” you retort, fixing your hair.
Tae grabs two controllers and plops onto the couch next to Jungkook. “Why’d you scream?”
“Your idiot of a best friend is obsessed with me and tried to sneak a peek into my journal,” you huff, dramatically clutching said journal to your chest.
“Oh, boy,” Tae clicks his tongue. “She’s serious about this thing, Jk. Wouldn’t advise you to –” he waves a hand vaguely, “–poke the bear.”
Jungkook looks like he is actually considering telling Tae what he saw in your beloved journal. His lips party slightly, brows furrowing, before he shakes the thought off. Good for him. You wouldn’t even know where to begin explaining why Jungkook’s name is written in there.
Taehyung hands one of the controllers to Jungkook.
“Is this my cue to turn off my show?” you ask, lips forming a natural pout of disappointment.
“Sorry, spontaneous boys' night,” Tae says with a shrug.
“Please never say that again.”
Jungkook snorts, finally looking at you.
You raise a brow. Challenge him silently.
He just grins, popping his dimples, rolling his shoulders back like he has the upper hand.
God, you hate him.
You stay in the living room while they game – despite considering retreating to your room multiple times when Jungkook and Tae started yelling at each like an old married couple.
But you quickly realise how fun it is to mess with Jungkook, especially when he gets roasted for his lack of skills by an oblivious Taehyung. Which, judging by the way Jungkook’s jaw keeps ticking and his grip on the controller tightens, is absolutely getting to him.
“Want more snacks?” you ask sweetly as you rise to your feet, collecting the empty bowls. One slips from your grasp, landing on the carpet. You bend over to grab it, in front of Jungkook, and maybe, just maybe, you move slower than necessary. Maybe shifting your hips a little too much. Maybe giving him a view he definitely does not deserve.
Tae, completely unbothered, waves you off like a fly buzzing around his screen. “___, get out of the way,” he complains impatiently, fingers rapidly clicking on his controller. “But I’ll have some more chips, thanks.”
Jungkook, however, isn’t saying shit.
You glance over your shoulder, just in time to catch the flicker of his eyes meeting yours before he collects himself and redirects his attention back to the game.
“You good, Jungkook?” you ask innocently.
His nostrils flare. Through gritted teeth, he mutters, “Just move.”
So you do, slow and smug, your shorts sliding back over your thighs as you pad toward the kitchen.
Right as you’re reaching for the drawer, you hear Taehyung ask, “What are you gonna do about that Sooyoung girl?” Your movements slow. “You interested?”
The nosiness and urge to gossip definitely runs through your genes.
“Nah, I don’t want her back.”
When you glance back, Jungkook’s still focused on the game, but there’s something absent in the way he’s holding the controller – like he’s playing on autopilot.
“That bad, huh?”
“Just wasn’t that deep.”
You busy yourself with the drawer, fingertips grazing over the handle as you bite back the urge to comment. Just listen.
“You never really said why you two broke up.”
“No, I did tell you,” Jungkook says, easy but firm. “You just never believed me.”
“That’s because it always felt like there was more.”
“There wasn’t. We just didn’t fit.”
Didn’t fit how?
You open the drawer and grab more snacks.
“Yeah...I don’t know. You never seemed truly happy with her.”
Jungkook exhales sharply through his nose. "I wasn’t miserable," he finally says.
“You weren’t happy either.”
“I don’t know. Maybe I stayed with Sooyoung because it was easy. No drama. No real emotions involved.”
With the snacks in tow, you walk back to the living room. “That sounds really sad, Jaykay,” you say, not trying to hide that you’ve been listening to them.
He shrugs. “Maybe. But at least it didn’t mess with my head.” His gaze lingers on you. “Didn’t make me feel like I was losing my mind.”
“Fuck, no, if someone makes you feel that way – leave, immediately,” Taehyung says.
You grab a bag of chips, tearing it open as you lean against the side of the couch. “You guys done being dramatic yet?”
Taehyung glances over his shoulder, narrowing his eyes. “You’re still here?”
“I live here.”
“Unfortunately.”
“Unfortunately?” you repat. “You were the one who happily agreed when mum and dad suggested that I move in with you. I wanted my own place!”
“Oh no, the princess didn’t get what she wanted. How dare they?” Jungkook mocks you.
You faintly remember the discussion of moving into an even bigger place, where all three of you would live together, but Jungkook denied that idea back then, saying the dorm that his athletic scholarship is providing him is good enough for him.
You scoff, shoving his shoulder as you pop another chip into your mouth. “Okay, first of all, you don’t get a say in this. Second of all, I’m not a princess.”
Jungkook tilts his head, a smirk playing on his lips. “Sure you aren’t.”
Taehyung snorts, eyes still glued to the screen. “You literally whined for two weeks straight about not having enough closet space.”
“That was a valid complaint,” you argue. “You take up, like, half of it with your stupid jerseys.”
“They’re collectibles.”
“They’re ugly.”
Jungkook laughs, finally leaning back into the couch, looking far too amused. “I see living together is going great for you two.”
“Oh, it’s fantastic,” Taehyung deadpans. “Every day is a blessing.”
“You’re so dramatic,” you mutter, but you can’t help the way your lips twitch. “I liked this conversation more when you gossiped about Jungkook’s life.”
Taehyung rolls his eyes, then jerks his chin toward Jungkook. “Dude, hurry up and lose so we can switch games.”
Jungkook, who has barely been playing at all, huffs. “I’m not gonna lose on purpose.”
“You’re already playing like shit,” Taehyung points out. “What’s up with you? Did Sooyoung get into your head or what?”
“Quit mentioning her,” Jungkook grumbles, jaw tightening.
Sooyoung?
No, that is not who is on is mind.
Why would he be thinking about her when – okay, you need to calm down. It’s not that serious.
You just need to call it a night, crawl into bed, and sleep it off.
“Heading to bed,” you announce, grabbing your journal from the coffee table.
“Alright, sleep tight,” Taehyung replies.
“Night, princess.” You flick the back of Jungkook’s head for that.
~
“Okay, very out of character for me, but we need to stop drinking for a sec and you need to tell me why the hell you keep looking back at Jungkook?” Eunji asks you all of a sudden, voice barely carrying over the muffled bass shaking the walls of the packed frat house.
The kitchen is one of the only semi-breathable spaces in the frat house, though the counters are a war zone of spilled liquor, sticky cups, and questionably abandoned drinks. The air reeks of cheap booze and sweat, but none of that is stopping Eunji from interrogating you.
You blink perplexed. “Out of character for you?” you ask back, eyeing the way she pulls back the cup you were just mixing a drink in. “I think that is very true to your character – very you. I’d be out of character for me to stop us from drinking.” You snatch back your cup.
“Did I say that?” She’s lost in her mind for a moment. “I don’t even remember. Am I that drunk already? I don’t wanna wake up hungover tomorrow.” She laments. “I still got this assignment due, and I wanted to get most of it done tomorrow, but – oh my god. Do not distract me from the question I just asked you.” She stares at you with sharp eyes. “Why do you keep looking back at Jungkook?”
“Am I?”
She huffs. “You don’t get to play this game with me, ___.” She pokes your tummy. “Answer me.”
You fully turn to her, abandoning the cup with the godawful alcohol mix – yes, it’s your creation, no, you’ve never had any talent for mixing drinks.
“I might have to tell you something.”
Her eyes widen. Immediately. Mouth opening in an unbelievable expression of pure, unfiltered drama. One that belongs in a reality show confession booth.
“Shut up. You did not – did you? Oh my god, shut up!”
“We might have hooked up for, like, a good few months.”
Her palm flies to cover her mouth. “Behind Taehyung’s back?” she whisper shouts.
“Well, obviously.” You point to yourself. “You think I’d be alive if he knew? You think he’d be alive if Tae knew?”
“You whore!”
“For Jungkook? Kinda,” you admit defeatedly.
You take a glimpse into his direction. Eunji shoves you on the shoulder for that.
“Don’t make it obvious!” she exclaims. “But you need to tell me everything. Right now.”
You sigh, leaning against the counter.
“The first time we hooked up was before I enrolled in uni. It was the summer before when Tae and Jungkook spontaneously visited and-“
“Okay, I need you to stop,” Eunji interrupts, fingers massaging her temples. “The summer before uni?” she repeats, exasperated. “You’ve been keeping it a secret since summer? I need more booze before you continue.”
“I’m sorry for not telling you, but we didn’t want anyone to know. He’d be pissed if he knew I told you.”
“No, don’t be sorry. I get it, I really do. I just didn’t expect this at all.” After pouring something inside her cup, she takes big gulps from it.
“I mean, what was I supposed to do? He’s hot, he’s pretty, and I’ve had a crush on him since, like, forever. I had to give in when he showed interest. What’s a girl gonna do?”
“How have you been able to keep it from Taehyung? They’re with each other 24/7.”
“He comes over when I know Tae’s gonna be out for a while. Or the other way around,” you reply, shrugging like it’s no big deal. “You can make anything work if you really want to, and I really wanted Jungkook.”
Still do, if you’re being honest.
You pause, then wave it off dramatically. “But that’s ancient history. We’re totally over that weird situationship.”
“What?!” Another shocked gasp escapes her. “Why?!”
“I don’t even know, to be honest. He just – we fucked, and then he...I dunno.” You grab your cup and down the rest of your drink, grimacing at the taste of whatever you concocted. “He got mad at me for texting Eunwoo after we had sex. I didn't even think he’d be all sensitive about it, especially since, you know, he’s with other girls too. But he got so pissed and we argued. And guess what?!” You throw your arms out, face dramatically incredulous. “He just leaves me in bed! Like, straight up walks out, saying stupid shit like I sleep around and only text him when I’m bored. Acting like we’re some exclusive thing, which we’re not! How dare he get so upset?” you argue theatrically, voice rising in pitch. “I’ve got better shit to do than this,” you mimic in Jungkook’s deep voice, eyes rolling for extra effect. “He’s so annoying.”
Eunji scrutinizes you for a brief moment before coming to her conclusion.
“Oh, he wants you bad.”
“Huh?” Your brows furrow. “He left me.”
“Because he wants you two to be exclusive and you don't. Why should he stay?”
Why should he stay?
You stare at Eunji, her words settling over you like an unwanted truth.
“He did ask me to be exclusive before,” you admit, twirling the empty cup in your hands. “But I always thought it would be a bad idea. Because being exclusive is so much more serious, and I want to be anything but serious with him. We don’t work that way. I can’t have that happening and risking Tae finding out. It would ruin everything.”
Eunji gives you a long, unimpressed look. “But being exclusive friends with benefits doesn’t have to mean more. It could just stay that way. Why do you always make things complicated?”
You huff, frustration bubbling up. “I don’t know.” You drop your forehead against her shoulder.
She pats your back like you’re a lost puppy.
“You’re and idiot, babe.”
“I know.”
“You also like him.”
You groan into her shoulder. “Shut up.”
“Just saying,” she singsongs.
It’s only now that you realise just how much you needed this – to talk to someone. To get all these tangled thoughts out of your head instead of letting them fester in silence. You’ve spent so much time convincing yourself that none of it mattered, brushing it off like it was nothing, but saying it out loud makes it real. And weirdly, that feels... good. Cathartic, even. Like exhaling after holding your breath for too long.
“Do you think I should-“ You start to lift your head, but Eunji pushes you back down with a firm hand.
“Everything will be fine, ___,” she babbles, patting your head a little too aggressively. “Just, you know, don’t be too sad.”
“What are you on about?”
“Just stay here for a sec.”
“Eunji.” You force yourself out of her grasp.
She’s looking somewhere past you, eyes flickering toward the living room, but when she realizes you’ve caught on, she quickly averts her gaze. Too quickly. Suspiciously.
You turn around, scanning the area to find what she doesn’t want you to see.
Your tummy churns in an instant when you see it.
Jungkook.
Heading up the stairs.
With Nayeon.
Even in the hazy lighting of the party, he stands out – broad shoulders wrapped in a dark, well-fitted tee, his silver chain glinting against his collarbone. He moves effortlessly, the easy confidence in his stride something you know all too well. His hand rests low on Nayeon’s back, fingertips grazing the thin fabric of her dress as she leans into him, whispering something into his ear.
Your throat tightens.
Eunji shifts beside you, watching your reaction carefully. “Hey, maybe it’s not-“
“I’m gonna throw up.”
The words leave your mouth before you can even think. You grab Eunji’s cup and down the last of her drink, but the alcohol does nothing to wash away the bitter taste in your mouth.
Your eyes scan the room frantically. “Wasn’t Eunwoo somewhere here too?” You rise onto your toes, searching the sea of bodies. “I think I just need to get my mind off things.”
“Oh, no, no, no, no,” Eunji immediately cuts in, grabbing your wrist before you can make any rash decisions. “We are not doing this.”
“Doing what?”
She levels you with a look. “You are not about to make a dumbass decision just to get back at Jungkook. Not on my watch.”
“I really, really hate him right now.”
“I know,” she soothes. “But no petty comebacks for situations where we absolutely do not need to make fools of ourselves, yeah?”
Your brain is screaming at you to make Jungkook feel just as shitty as you do, to do something reckless and distracting, but deep down, you know Eunji’s right.
You steal another glance at the staircase. They’re gone.
The realization sinks in, and suddenly, the air in the frat house feels suffocating. The bass of the music thrums in your chest, the chatter around you blurring into an overwhelming hum.
“I need air,” you mutter, pushing past Eunji before she can stop you.
She sighs but doesn’t follow. She knows you need a moment alone.
You slip through the crowd, weaving your way toward the back door. The night air hits you instantly, cool against your heated skin, but it does little to settle the storm raging in your chest.
Leaning against the railing of the porch, you inhale deeply, forcing your nerves to settle.
This is fine.
~
“Can you promise you won’t puke on me?”
“I mean, I can, but I don’t know if I can keep the promise.”
You spotted Chanyeol with another guy—Jackson, you think—smoking and went over to chat with them. It wasn’t until they finished their joint that curiosity got the best of you. One thing led to another, and Jackson went inside to roll you one. Now, all three of you are standing outside, two pairs of curious eyes fixed on you.
“She’ll be fine,” Jackson says as he exhales a slow stream of smoke, watching it curl into the night air.
Chanyeol eyes you warily as he sparks up your joint. “I don’t know how much you drank tonight, but please tell me if you feel sick.” He holds it out for you.
You hesitate for half a second before taking it between your fingers. It feels weird, unnatural. “So I just…?”
“Inhale, but not too hard. Hold it for a second, then let it out,” Chanyeol instructs.
You follow his guidance, pulling in a slow drag. The taste is harsher than you expected, earthy and a little burnt, making you cough almost instantly.
“Classic first hit,” Jackson says, but it’s not as reassuring as he thinks. “Give it a sec.”
“How do you feel?” Chanyeol asks, watching you closely.
“Feels very icky,” you tell him, nose scrunched up. “But I’m feeling okay.”
“Yo, Jackson!” some dude yells from the back. Jackson disappears, leaving Chanyeol and you alone.
“You sure you’re fine?”
The night air feels heavier now, the music from inside muffled like you’re hearing it through a wall. Your fingers tingle slightly, warmth spreading through your limbs. You shift on your feet, suddenly hyper-aware of the way your body moves.
You blink at him. “I think my brain is moving slower than my body.”
He laughs. “Yeah, that happens. Just ride it out.”
You exhale, watching the smoke swirl in front of you.
“The fuck?”
Your head snaps toward the voice.
Jungkook stands a few feet away, brows furrowed, looking like he just walked into some kind of crime scene. His eyes flick between you and the joint in your fingers, then to Chanyeol, before settling back on you.
For some reason, your eyes wander to his hands. He’s probably touched so many things tonight, so many body parts. Did he wash them?
“The hell you’re doing?” Jungkook asks, walking towards you.
“Uhm, having fun?” you try, watching his frown deepen.
“This is not something you do, ___.” Jungkook directs his glare at Chanyeol. “Why the fuck would you give this to her?”
“Fuck, Jungkook, if you wanna be angry be angry elsewhere,” Chanyeol says, rolling his eyes.
“You fuck off,” Jungkook counters.
“As if you have never smoked.” Chanyeol raises his brows.
“I don’t smoke.”
“Trying to maintain a squeaky-clean image for those scouts who might be watching?”
“Mind your fucking business.”
“Jungkook, you’re being rude.” You turn to him, pointing a finger at his broad chest. “You’ve been going around, having fun yourself but can’t let other people have fun. That’s not nice of you.”
You stare up at him, a sullen pout on your mouth before pulling another slow drag and trying hard to not cough, but a small cough slips out anyway.
“Get that shit away, ___,” Jungkook demands, unimpressed by the smoke surrounding his face.
“Why do you care? Lemme have fun.”
“This shit fucks with your head.”
My brain’s already fucked, you think. Thanks a lot.
“It’s just weed?”
“Taehyung will lose his mind.”
“Is Tae with us now?”
Jungkook arches his brow.
“Oh, you wouldn’t.”
“Stop right now or I’ll call him.”
You hold his gaze, daring him. “You’re bluffing.”
Jungkook pulls his phone out of his pocket without hesitation, thumb hovering over the screen. “Try me.”
You wait, staring at Jungkook’s screen until he actually calls Taehyung.
Before the call can connect, you groan and shove the joint into Chanyeol’s hand. “God, fine, I’m done.”
He hangs up before Taehyung can answer.
You glare at him, but he only tilts his head toward the house. “Let’s get you some water.”
He guides you towards the house with his hand splayed across your side. At first, you shy away from his touch, mind racing with thoughts you’d rather not acknowledge. But as the night air presses cool against your skin, you let yourself relax, leaning into him slightly as you walk up the stairs.
“You’re so mean, you know that?” you huff.
“I’m just looking out for you,” he replies, in a softer tone than before.
“You didn’t have to be mean with Chanyeol. It wasn’t his weed. Chanyeol was actually very kind, made sure I was feeling okay-“
Jungkook stops at the threshold of the house.
“I’m gonna have a little chat with Jackson.”
“How do you know-“
His hand slips from your waist. He turns, leaving you standing on the porch, and disappears in the crowd.
Because that’s just easy for him – leaving you.
Why should he stay?
You don’t care.
You don’t care.
And if you keep telling yourself that, maybe – just maybe – you’ll start to believe it.
~
Flash forward a week, and you can now say –proudly, with your full chest – that you do care.
You’ve never not cared. Pretended? Yes. But gotten over it? Not even close.
Which is why it’s not surprising that you find yourself at yet another party, drink in hand, scanning the room without meaning to. Or maybe you do mean to. Maybe you want to see him. Maybe you want him to see you. Maybe you want him to know that he didn’t get to you. Even though he did.
You’re sunk into the couch, surrounded by your friend group, half-listening as they go on about today’s hockey practice – boy gossip, oh how you love it.
“Coach told him he’s probably getting benched next game,” Jimin says, shaking his head as he leans back against the couch. “Too many penalties last match. Dumbass just keeps throwing hits for no reason.”
“That’s what happens when you let your ego get ahead of you,” Jin chimes in, stretching his legs out. “Coach is tired of his shit. And honestly? Fair.”
“I heard he almost fought Yoongi in the locker room,” Taehyung adds, arching a brow as he takes a sip of his drink. “Over something stupid too, like warm-up drills.”
“Swear to God, that guy needs to chill,” Jimin scoffs. “He’s got all the talent, but he plays like he’s trying to prove something every damn game.”
When Taehyung gets up to grab himself another drink, you catch him by the sleeve.
“Can you get me one too, please?” You hand him your empty cup.
Taehyung eyes the cup. “You’ve been drinking a bit more lately.”
“It’s just my second drink?”
His sharp eyes linger on you for a moment before he reluctantly takes your cup and walks off. He hasn’t missed the shift in your behaviour these past few weeks. You try to hide it, but there’s only so much you can do.
“Could say the same thing about Jungkook, though,” Jin says.
Jin’s words linger in the air, but you don’t dare react.
“Jungkook’s always been like that,” Jimin says, tipping his drink back. “Plays like he’s got something to prove, but I guess he kinda does. He wants to go pro, so it’s not like he can afford to slack off.”
It’s stupid, silly even, how easily his name can unravel you. How even when he’s not here, he’s everywhere.
“Isn’t your dad gonna come to the next game?” Jimin directs at you.
You shrug. “Maybe? I dunno.”
Given that your dad is an NHL executive, former team owner, he tries to find time in his busy schedule to attend the hockey games. The boys probably see him more than you do.
“Where is Jungkook anyway?” Hobi asks. “Is he gonna come over at all?”
Dear god, you hope, pray, he won’t.
You can’t live through seeing him disappear with another girl upstairs. You don’t have Eunji with you today to keep you from doing reckless decisions.
“He’d be all over Nayeon anyway. Doubt he’d even remember we exist,” Jin chuckles, unknowingly ruining the rest of your night.
The sound of their laughter grates against your nerves. The more you sit here, the more unbearable it becomes. The thought of him, of her, of what they could be doing, poisons your mind until you can’t take it anymore.
Taehyung returns, pressing a fresh drink into your hand. He barely gets a word in before his gaze sharpens. “You okay?”
You nod stiffly. “Yeah.”
“Liar.”
His voice is quiet enough that no one else hears, but it makes your stomach flip. He knows you too well. And if you sit here any longer, he’s going to drag the truth out of you, whether you like it or not.
So you stand abruptly, mumbling something about fresh air before slipping through the crowd, out into the cool night. The moment you’re alone, you let out a breath, pressing your fingers to your temples. It doesn’t help. Nothing does.
Before you can talk yourself out of it, you pull out your phone, scroll down to the name you should ignore, and press call.
Jungkook answers on the second ring.
“Did you call me on accident?”
You ignore his question, your fingers tightening around your phone as you shift your weight from one foot to the other. Instead, you ask, “Are you gonna come to the party?”
“No, I have some assignments to do,” he answers, hesitantly. “Why’d you ask?”
“Are you sure?” Your eyes close, waiting for the confirmation that you won’t have to see things (Jungkook and a girl that isn’t you) that you don’t want to see (him hooking up with someone that isn’t you).
“Yeah, positive.” There’s a pause, and then he adds, “Is there something you don’t want me to see? Or—wait, are you just making sure I won’t be around to ruin your night?” Jungkook laughs and you realise how you’ve missed that sound. “It’s your lucky day. You won’t see my face poking around in the crowd. You can have fun.”
You frown at the nonsense he’s saying. He couldn’t be more off.
“No, you don’t get it.”
“What am I not getting?”
You stare into the night sky, the stars blurred by the city lights. You consider hanging up, letting the moment pass, but then you remember what Eunji told you. Talk to him. Get the discomfort out of the way.
“You know I’m not an insecure person.” You cross one arm over your body, rubbing your bare skin against the rising cold. “Like, I’m confident in who I am. I don’t compare myself to others because, y’know, I don’t care enough about stuff like that.”
“Yeah, of course I know that. You’re a confident girl. Have always been.”
“But you know what makes me go crazy?”
“What?”
“Seeing you with someone else.” The words slip out before you can catch them, but now that they’re out in the open, you can’t take them back. You don’t want to. Or – I dunno if it’s just that. I want you to want me. And you don’t. Which I get, I’ve been a bit shitty, so you deserve to want someone that isn’t like me, but – it just makes me go a bit insane, because I thought you did want me again the other night. At my place.” Your voice drops on the last sentence, barely above a whisper. “But then I see you with Nayeon and you just don’t care.”
You take a break, trying to organise your thoughts, but it’s fruitless because it’s just a tangled mess up there.
“Eunji said to talk with you but still give us a bit time, but oh my god I just want it to be okay between us again. I’m feeling so confused, and I don’t even really know what’s going on, but all I know is that I want things to be like before. When you still wanted me, and I wanted you and everything was good, easy,” you say, exhaling a helpless breath. “Do you think that’s possible?”
It’s silent for a beat. You don’t blame him – you couldn’t recite half the stuff that just poured out of your mouth.
“Fuck, ___.” He sounds a bit helpless himself.
Jungkook sighs on the other end, and you hear the faint rustle of fabric, like he’s shifting, maybe running a hand through his hair. “I don’t know what to say to that,” he finally admits.
“Say anything,” you murmur.
“What do you want me to do, ___?” His voice is quieter now, more controlled, but there’s something simmering beneath the surface. “Stop seeing other people? Pretend like none of this ever happened? Or do you just want me to tell you that, yeah, I still want you?”
Your breath hitches. “Do you?”
“I thought I made that obvious,” he mutters. “But every time I think we’re on the same page, you pull away and act difficult. So, forgive me if I stopped trying to figure you out.”
“I don’t mean to act difficult.”
“Then why do you?”
You don’t have an answer. Or maybe you do, but you’re scared to say it.
Jungkook waits, but when you don’t respond, he lets out a dry laugh. “You know what’s funny? I wasn’t even gonna go to the party tonight. But now I kinda want to.”
“Why?”
“Maybe I wanna see what happens when you have to look me in the eyes.” His voice is lower now, rougher. “Because talking like this? It’s too easy for you.”
“No, don’t come.” You think of the worst-case scenario – arguing with Jungkook, him getting frustrated, turning to Nayeon because she’s easier, likes her more than you. And you couldn’t stand seeing that.
“Or maybe do, if you want,” you add, voice quieter. “I think I’m gonna leave anyway. Wanna go home.” Avoiding situations – your strong suit.
“How much have you had to drink?”
You stare at the untouched drink in your hand before lifting it to your lips. The sweetness hits first, masking the barely-there burn of alcohol (thanks, Tae). “Starting my third drink now.”
“I can walk you home,” he offers.
“It’s not a long walk to my place. You don’t have to.”
“I want to.” A rustle of movement on the other end before he adds, “On my way right now.”
“I’ll wait at the front for you.”
You weave your way back inside the house to find Taehyung, who’s still in the living room chatting with one of his teammates.
“Gonna go home, Tae,” you say, your voice cutting through their conversation. He glances up, distracted for a moment, before raising an eyebrow. “Also, here–” You hand him the drink he made for you. “This is not fun to drink at all.”
Taehyung rolls his eyes at your sassy comment but takes the cup from your hand. “Learn how to enjoy a party without getting drunk.”
“You tell me to get out of my room more, and when I do, this is what you say? Pick a side,” you grumble.
“Why do you wanna go home?” His fingers adjust the top of your strapless dress absentmindedly as he asks. “You okay?”
“Eh, just a bit bored.”
“We’re gonna play truth or dare in a bit,” Taehyung’s friend pipes up, raising his eyebrows in an exaggerated manner. “Maybe you should stick around.”
“I think I’ll skip,” you say. “But please do me a favour and fill me in on all the drama I’ll be missing out on.”
He winks at you. “Will do.”
“I’ll walk you home,” Taehyung says, stepping towards you.
You know he won’t allow you to go home by yourself, so you opt for telling him the truth. “Jungkook’s coming to take me home.”
“Jungkook?” he asks, surprised. “Did you call him?”
“Yeah, I asked him. Didn’t wanna annoy you. Go have fun doing...” You glance over at Jimin and Hobi, who are holding an impromptu drinking competition. Hobi’s attempting to chug straight from a bottle of something clearly too strong for him, while Jimin’s pretending to be the host of a weird, offbeat game show. “...whatever that is,” you finish, trying to hold back a laugh.
“You really can’t leave those two alone for a second, can you?” Taehyung lets out a low chuckle, shaking his head. “Tell Jungkook to swing by here once he drops you off.”
“He didn’t sound like he was in the mood to stop by, but I'll tell him.”
“Text me when you get home, yeah?” he says over his shoulder, already walking back toward Jimin and a very much unconscious Hobi, who’s sprawled out on the couch looking like he’s had one too many rounds.
~
Jungkook finds you almost immediately. You barely have time to register his presence before he’s already slipping his zip hoodie over your shoulders, his hands smoothing over the fabric like he’s tucking you in for the night.
“You should’ve waited inside,” he mutters, fingers lingering at the collar like he’s seriously considering zipping it up for you too.
You swat his hands away, glancing around quickly. “Jungkook, don’t – everyone’s watching.”
He raises an eyebrow. “Who’s watching?”
You look over your shoulder. “I dunno. People.”
Jungkook huffs a laugh, stepping closer. “Right. Because me making sure you don’t freeze to death is so scandalous,” he jokes. “But smoking weed the other day was okay to do outside? With all the people there?”
“As a friend you’re supposed to forget my mess-ups, not remind me of them.” You huff, faintly remembering when you tried weed for the first time. You did puke that night. Luckily not on Chanyeol. “You didn’t have to come,” you grumble, even as you tug the hoodie tighter around yourself, his warmth and the faint scent of his detergent wrapping around you like a second skin.
“I know,” he says, tilting his head. “But I wanted to.”
And then, because he’s annoying, he reaches up and tugs the hood over your head, effectively swallowing half your face in fabric.
You let out a muffled noise of protest, pushing it back down immediately. “Stop that.”
Jungkook just grins, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he starts walking. “You look cute like that, though.”
You glare at him but fall into step beside him anyway, the hoodie still draped around you like it belongs there. The night air nips at your skin, but his warmth lingers, and you swear he notices the way you pull the sleeves over your hands like it’s yours.
“So…” His voice is quieter now. “What you said on the phone earlier.”
Your stomach twists. “What about it?”
“I just—” He starts, then pauses. “I don’t know what you want from me, ___. One second, you’re pushing me away, and the next, you’re telling me you can’t stand seeing me with someone else. You –” He falters, his voice catching slightly. “Do you even know what you want?”
“I know that you ruined me for other boys, for one,” you say, sighing deeply before you continue. “I want things to be like before,” you reply. “When everything wasn’t so…” You gesture vaguely. “Complicated. I don’t like this. And I don’t like how I feel when I see you with –” You cut yourself off before the name can leave your lips. He knows anyway.
Jungkook watches you carefully, hands still stuffed into his pockets, shoulders slightly hunched. “I wasn’t trying to rub anything in your face,” he says after a pause. “I didn’t think it’d… affect you.”
“Well, it did,” you say, a little too fast, a little too defensive. “And I hate that it did, because it’s not like I have a right to be mad about it.”
Jungkook tilts his head. “Don’t you?”
That stops you in your tracks.
Because – do you? You don’t know what this is, don’t know what you want from him except for more. More of his attention, more of his time, more of him. But not all of him, right? Because that would mean–
“God,” you mumble, rubbing your hands down your face. “Why are you making me say things?”
Jungkook chuckles, nudging your side. “You called me, remember?”
You groan. “Worst decision I’ve ever made.”
“Harsh.”
“Accurate.”
Jungkook lets out a short laugh, but then he’s quiet for a beat before he says, “Look, I don’t wanna play games. If you want me, then say it.”
You swallow. “I do.”
“But we don’t want each other like that,” he adds.
“Yeah, no.” You chew on your lip, pulling his hoodie tighter around yourself. “I just… don’t want to see you with other people. And I don’t want to pretend that it doesn’t bother me.”
“I don’t wanna see you with anyone else either.” Jungkook exhales, running a hand through his hair. “You want to keep fucking but be exclusive.”
You wince. “Could you not say it like that?”
“What, say it like the truth?”
You purse your lips, staring at him. “Is it a no?”
Jungkook doesn’t say anything for a second. Then, he sighs. “It’s not a no. I’ve been asking you for this, and you always pushed me away.”
“You know am not good with serious conversations. I like it when things are easy.” You cross your arms, trying to shield yourself, but your eyes can’t help but flicker towards him. “I don’t mean to push you away,” you admit. “I just– I get scared.”
His lips part slightly, like he wasn’t expecting that. And then – without a word – he reaches out, pulling the hoodie up so the zipper meets your chin, like he’s tucking you in.
Your heart trips over itself. “What are you doing?”
He grins, hands still lingering near your collar. “Making sure you don’t run away before you finish talking.”
“I wouldn’t run,” you protest.
Jungkook raises a brow.
“…Okay, maybe I would,” you mutter.
His grin softens into something fonder. “Well, you didn’t,” he says simply. “You’re talking to me now.” His thumb brushes over the fabric near your shoulder. “And I know that’s not easy for you.”
Your face grows hot. You roll your eyes, looking away. “Okay, don’t be nice about it.”
Jungkook laughs, bumping your forehead lightly with his. “Sorry, can’t help it. I’m proud of you.”
Your stomach flips. You shove at his chest. “Ugh. Shut up.”
He just laughs harder, catching your wrist before you can push him again. “Too late.”
You elbow him, but he catches your arm, smirking as he tugs you closer. “So that’s it?” His voice drops slightly. “You’re mine, and I’m yours, but we don’t call it anything?”
The words send a shiver down your spine. Mine.
“…Yeah,” you say. “Something like that.”
Jungkook hums, his grip on your wrist loosening but not quite letting go. His fingers brush against yours for a second before he shoves his hands back into his pockets.
“Just stay with me.” You glance at him. “Don’t leave.”
“I’ll stay. Don’t worry.”
You continue walking, the quiet hum of the streetlights and distant city noise filling the silence.
“Taehyung said he wants you to stop by at the party once you drop me off,” you tell Jungkook, letting the information hang in the air before you ask, “But hang out with me instead?”
“You know, I was doing very important things before you called.”
“You never do uni stuff and this is the day you’re deciding to do a personality rebrand?”
“What do you mean? I’m on top of my grades...Kinda.”
You huff at his response. “Then, I dunno. Wanna be nerdy together? I can help you with your assignment.”
You’re pretty sure your marketing major and fashion design minor won’t do much to help him with stats, but you’re definitely down to stick around just to be close to him.
“I don’t think you can, but being nerdy together sounds extremely intriguing, so come on.” He holds his hand out for you and drags you the other way around to his dorm.
It’s not far, just a few blocks over, but the way his fingers loosely wrap around yours makes the walk feel shorter.
~
Here’s how the rest of the night goes: Jungkook, the ever exemplary student, continues working on his assignment, while you – an accomplished liar who successfully deceived Jungkook into believing you would help him – pretend to help for all of five minutes before succumbing to the far more important task of online shopping for cute clothes.
It’s being nerdy together (your version).
Every so often, he glances at you, probably wondering if you’ll suddenly become useful. You do not. Instead, you kick your feet up on his bed, adding yet another item to your cart that you definitely don’t need.
Your thumb hovers over the screen, eyes locked on the top that has no business being so cute. A strapless, velvety pink crop top. The entire front is held together by a line of sparkling, rhinestone heart clasps, leaving slivers of skin exposed.
“Do you think this is cute?” You turn your phone toward Jungkook.
“Very pretty.” Jungkook nods in approval, until his eyes flick down to the price. “What the fuck, ___.”
“What?” Add to cart. “It’s cute, no?”
“You’re a terrible study partner,” he mutters, typing on his laptop.
“I never claimed to be one,” you say, scrolling past a top that you absolutely do need. “Isn't being in my presence motivating enough?”
Jungkook snorts. “Right. I’m so motivated by your commitment to retail therapy.”
“Good,” you say, adding another item to your cart. “Then I’m doing my job.”
You watch him work on his assignment, your gaze drifting to his hands resting on the keyboard. His fingers are long and lean, the veins running along his wrists just noticeable under his skin. It's like every little movement is getting your attention, and suddenly, all you can think about is how good those hands would feel on you.
“What about this,” you say, a ghost of a smirk dancing at the corner of your lips. “When you finish your task, we can look through some lingerie. You can help me pick out a few things.”
The back of Jungkook’s head hits the wall. His eyes wander to the mirror on the opposite side of the room. You catch him staring – specifically at your propped-up legs, his gaze lingering a little too close to where your dress has ridden up, just enough to reveal a peek of lace.
“Hey, no peeking,” you scold, snapping your legs shut and stretching them out flat on his bed again, smoothing your dress down for good measure. “That’s also for later, when you finish your assignment.”
Smirking, you shift on the bed, just to test him.
“Must be so hard,” you muse, pretending to stretch as your dress slides just a little higher on your thighs. “Having a mirror right there, nowhere else to look.”
He scoffs. “If I wanted to see, I wouldn’t need a mirror.”
Jungkook doesn’t break eye contact, like he’s daring you to react. And maybe you should. Maybe you should roll your eyes, call him cocky, say you wish – but your brain isn’t working fast enough to form words.
“Remember how I fucked you against it?”
In his jersey. How could you forget?
And the way Jungkook’s lips twitch, like he knows exactly what he’s doing to you, makes your face heat up instantly.
“When has it become so easy to make you shy?”
“I’m not.” You glare at him, but it only seems to amuse him more. His lips quirk higher, that same infuriating twitch like he’s enjoying this way too much.
You sit up straighter, leaning forward just enough so your dress pulls a little higher on your thighs, the movement slow and deliberate.
Jungkook’s eyes move to your legs, and you see that flicker of desire flash across his face. His fingers twitch, like he wants to do something – anything – but he stays still.
“Wanna have a little taste to get some motivation to finish your work?” you tease, the giddy rush that heated your body fading as you flash him a mischievous smile.
“Anything to distract me from this shit,” he replies, already pushing the laptop off his lap, the screen still filled with charts and statistics problems. Ugh.
You shift to your knees and grab the back of his neck, crashing your mouth against his. He deepens the kiss a little, his lips soft against yours, the taste of him sweet and familiar. His breath mingles with yours, warm and steady. His hand lands on your waist, fingers lightly tracing the curve of your body.
You pull back just a little, eyes fluttering open to meet his, and for a second, you both just smile at each other, breathless and giddy.
“Should’ve been doing this instead of staring at those charts,” he murmurs, his thumb brushing your cheek as he gently tucks a strand of hair behind your ear.
You laugh softly, heart fluttering, before kissing him again – this time with more confidence, more warmth. His arms wrap around you, pulling you closer as if he can’t get enough. His touch is gentle, but you can feel the quiet desperation behind it.
His rosy lips are swollen after a few more minutes of kissing and touching and grinding.
You slide off the bed and drop down to the floor, your hands running over his thighs, silently urging him to move closer. He shifts toward you, letting out a sharp breath when your palm him through his grey sweatpants.
You want to start of slow, want to take your time, but you’re also so needy and greedy for him, that you can’t help but tug his sweatpants down his legs, along with his briefs.
You take his semi hard dick in your hands and begin to stroke him. You let a drop of spit fall onto his cock for lubrication.
Jungkook puffs out a deep breath. You want to hear more of that.
“What happened to a little taste?” he asks, barely able to contain the moans that leave his mouth.
“Can’t help it,” you shrug, watching him grow bigger and harder in your hand.
His hand reaches for the hoodie he gave you earlier, which was carelessly thrown on his bed. He places it gently on the floor in front of you.
“Sit here,” he says, smoothing out the fabric. “Don’t want your knees to hurt.”
You shuffle your knees onto his hoodie, adjusting yourself, and continue stroking him up and down. At some point, you use both of your hands. You missed feeling his heavy cock in your hands, sitting beneath him and just playing with him.
“Spit on it, baby,” he says, voice low as he grabs his cock by the base and holds it for you to spit on. “Good girl.” He watches you with hooded eyes rub your spit all over him, mixing it with the precum leaking from his tip.
His cock is shiny, glistening with veins adoring his length. You stick out your tongue, gently swiping it over his head. Jungkook hisses when you swirl your tongue around his tip, teasing him with slow moves. He strokes himself while you play with his tip.
“Missed this view.” He pulls away his cock and starts slapping it against your tongue, the heavy feeling and wet noises immediately making you press your thighs together. “Look so pretty on your knees. Such a pretty girl.” Jungkook slides his head into your mouth. “Suck, baby.”
You close your mouth around his cock while you lock eyes with him. Slowly taking him deeper until you can’t take more. Your eyes are already watery and you didn’t even get most of him inside your mouth. You bob your head up and down in a slow, leisure pace.
“Fuck, that’s it,” he praises, threading his fingers through your hair to push it away from your face. “Relax your throat for me, yeah?”
When you do, he presses his hand on the back of your head, pushing your down on his cock and forcing you to swallow nearly half of him. Jungkook lets out a pretty moan when he feels the tightness of your throat around his cock, closing his eyes for a moment. Tears sting your eyes when he pulls you back, your hands gripping his thighs for leverage.
He lets you catch your breath before pushing you down again, moving your head in a tempo to his liking. When he shoves his cock particularly deep into you, you gag, tears rolling down your cheeks. You’re an absolute mess when he pulls out.
“What a good girl you are,” Jungkook says, his voice hoarse and low. “You just love sucking cock, don’t you?” He rubs his sticky cock against your mouth before slapping his head against it. He moves to your right cheek, smearing the mess over your skin and lightly tapping his cock. “Hm, princess?” he asks softer, almost with fake sympathy. He raises his brows in question, looking down at you like there’s just you and no one else.
“Love it so much,” you agree, moving your head along to the mess he’s making on your face.
Putting his cock back into your mouth, Jungkook leans back, watching you with pleasure etched into his expression as you move your head swiftly, twisting your hand around the part you can’t reach.
“So good,” he mutters, his tatted hand against your cheek just to feel you.
You tug your dress down and bring his cock down to your tits. You spit between the valley of your tits, using his tip to catch it and spread it across your boobs. You moan when his head brushes over your perky nipples. You circle his cock around them in small movements, breathy puffs escaping your mouth with how sensitive you are.
“You’re so fucking hot.” Jungkook fondles one breast with his hand, kneading it with his long fingers. He lets a little drop of spit fall onto your chest too, hungrily watching as you rub it against your soft skin with his cock. “Just want a mess everywhere, right?”
You nod, dragging his cock back into your mouth because you just need to taste him.
Jungkook curses under his breath when you start playing with his balls with your other hand. “Fuck, baby. Gonna cum if you keep going.”
Music to your ears.
You continue, swirling your tongue around his cock as you move up and down, trying to go as deep as you can. You can tell he doesn’t want to cum yet, but he doesn’t drag you off his cock, he’s too needy and horny.
“Cum on my tits.” You shift, jerking his cock in front of your chest.
“You want me to?”
“Please,” you beg, pushing your tits together with your arm, looking up at him with big eyes.
He moans at that sight, spurts of cum shooting across your chest. He paints your tits white with a big load. Your mouth hangs open slightly at the cum dripping from his cock. You lick his cock clean before looking down at your tits.
“You came so much.” You hold your tits in your hands. You flick your finger through some of the cum, putting it in your cum afterwards.
“Fuck, ___, please.”
You giggle at his reaction. You rub the cum into your skin with his still hard cock before it can drip down and create and even bigger mess. Your tits are all shiny from his cum when you’re done.
A shaky breath bubbles from Jungkook’s mouth when you stroke him once more, for good measure. “Pretty sure you got every drop.” He taps your elbow, motioning for you to get up. “Come here.” He pats the bed. “Get on all fours for me.”
While you get comfy on your knees on his bed, he takes off his clothes. Jungkook pushes your dress up your ass, the fabric bunched around your waist.
Jungkook slides one finger between your legs, slowly tracing your pussy through your panties.
“My dick in your mouth got you so wet, huh?” He pushes your panties aside, uttering a soft groan at the sight of your slick pussy. “So needy for me.” He bends down and you can feel his breath on your folds.
“Jungkook, please,” you whine.
“Please?” he repeats. “Such a well-mannered girl.” His tongue darts out, licking a stripe across your pussy.
You’re so incredibly sensitive, been yearning for this for so long, that you back arches immediately, thighs starting to quiver at Jungkook’s mild torture with his tongue.
Jungkook moves to your clit. He switches from little flicks to your nub and sucking on it, creating wet and filthy noises. He’s skilled with his mouth – perhaps a bit too skilled for your liking. But right now, you don’t have the energy to think too deeply about it, you’re just focused on the tingling pleasure that shoots through your tummy.
“Right there, Kook. Don’t stop.”
You watch him through the mirror – the way he is keeping your cheeks apart with his hands, face buried between your thighs, fluffy hair bouncing along with his movements. So handsome, so pretty, so yours.
“Pussy tastes so fucking good,” He mumbles, his fingers sinking deeper into your skin.
“So close. Wanna cum, Jungkook.”
Jungkook hums against you, the vibration making your breath hitch. It’s just his mouth on your pussy, but he knows his way around, knows how to make you squirm.
The pressure builds, winding tight in your core, seconds from snapping. “Jungkook,” you gasp, voice wrecked. “I’m–”
He groans into you, gripping harder, and that’s it—that’s all it takes. The tension in your body breaks all at once, pleasure hitting so hard your vision goes hazy. A choked sound spills from your lips, legs trying to squeeze shut, but he doesn’t let you. Just stays there, working you through it, dragging it out until you’re nothing but shivers and gasps, completely undone beneath him.
Only then does he pull back, breathing heavy, lips slick and swollen. He looks up at you through the mirror, something dark, almost possessive in his gaze, and swipes his thumb over his mouth like he’s savouring the taste.
You look back at him, smiling at his shiny face. His lips are covered along with his chin and his nose and a bit of his cheeks.
“This is, like, one of your best looks.”
“What, fresh out the pussy?”
You giggle. “Yeah,” you mutter, swiping your finger over the tip of his nose to clean him.
“I could have my face buried down there forever. I don’t think you realise how good you taste.” You feel his finger spreading your folds. “But I know my girl is very needy, so she wants cock, hm?”
You sigh, melting into his touch when you feel him slap his dick against your pussy instead. “You know me so well.”
The dick slaps are so wet, and your haze-filled mind craves nothing more than for him to shove his cock inside you, raw and deep, filling you the way you need – no barriers, no hesitation.
But Jungkook is actually able to still form sensible thoughts through the horny haze and grabs a condom from his nightstand.
He doesn’t tease you much before he enters you, just slowly, inch by inch, sliding his cock inside you.
“You good, baby?”
“Uh-huh, you can move.”
You gasp, the feeling almost overwhelming but exactly what you wanted. His hands grip your hips, pulling you back toward him as he starts a steady pace from behind, each thrust making your head spin.
“Missed this pussy,” Jungkook rasps, sneaking one hand down to your ass to spank it, eliciting a surprised moan from you. “So tight, so perfect.” He grabs a handful of your ass. “So mine.”
He fucks you rough, doesn’t give you any chance to think of anything but him. Your hands are clutching at his covers, holding the fabric tightly in your palms.
You feel him spit down on your ass. He rubs his finger over your puckered hole, making you whine and bite your lip at the feeling.
“Oh, Jungkook.” He slides his thumb inside, just the tip of his finger, and yet it feels like so much more, the pleasure intensifying.
“You’re such a slut for me, aren’t you?” he asks, not stopping his relentless pace. “Love getting all your holes filled. So, so dirty.” Contempt is dripping from his voice, and you can’t help but have your pussy throbbing at that.
“Just for you,” you breathe. “Just you, Jungkook.”
“That’s, right.” He pushes his thumb a bit deeper, making your fingers tighten around Jungkook’s sheets. “You’re my girl.”
Your heart is racing, pulse pounding in your ears, and all you can do is nod, your body responding to him without thought, your need for him overwhelming.
With his other hand he tugs at your hair, wrapping it around his hand and creating a makeshift ponytail.
“Look at how pretty you look.”
You turn your head to the mirror. Your back is fully arched, and Jungkook’s all over your, his muscled and tatted body towering over you with his cock deeply buried inside your pussy.
He withdraws his thumb from your hole, delivering another spank to your ass.
“Make me go fucking crazy,” he mumbles, wrapping his hand around your tummy and pulling you up against his chest.
“Kook,” you mumble, resting your head in the crook of his neck. You don’t know what you want, only that you’re feeling this irresistible pull to him, like you want to be even closer to him.
He lets your hair go, moving his hand to your tits and squeezing them.
“Cum with me,” he whispers into your ear, immediately sending shivers down your spine. “Look at yourself when you cum, baby. Want you to see how pretty you are.”
When he sneaks his hand that was wrapped around your tummy down between your legs and starts flicking his fingers over your clit, it’s officially over for you.
You still try to keep your eyes open like Jungkook told you so as you teeter off the edge, your climax consuming you. You watch him come undone too, his brows knitted together, and bottom lip caught between his teeth.
You’re weak on your knees, but Jungkook keeps you firm to his chest, not letting fall as he thrusts into you in a slower, sloppier pace. He peppers your neck and shoulders with little kisses, and you giggle a little, delirious on your high. Your hand reaches for his bicep and you squeeze it.
His skin is hot under your touch, muscles flexing as he holds you up, keeping you steady against him. The slow drag of his movements sends waves of overstimulation through your body, but you don’t pull away.
“I know, baby.” Jungkook hums against your shoulder, his lips still ghosting over your skin, pressing lazy kisses between heavy breaths. “Still with me?” he murmurs, voice low, teasing, as his fingers brush down your sides.
You nod, melting further into him, body pliant against his.
Jungkook pulls out. You whine at the loss. He tosses the condom on the floor – you're too spent to tell him how gross that is – and shifts on the bed, lying down together with you.
His arm drapes over your waist, pulling you close, your body naturally moulding into his like it’s second nature. His skin is still warm, his breaths deep and steady as he settles beside you.
You glance down on yourself – you’re a mess. Panties still on, just pulled to the side like he liked, dress bunched around your waist, evidence of him all over you.
“Can I take a shower before I leave?”
“Sure.”
You wait.
You look up at Jungkook. “You’re not gonna ask if you can join me?”
“I thought that was clear?”
You smile. “Good.”
“Hey – will you now tell me what you wrote in your journal about me?”
“I know we’re back to being friends with benefits, but please know your place.”
“It was worth a try.”
#jungkook smut#jungkook fanfic#jungkook angst#jungkook scenario#jungkook imagines#jungkook fic#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#jeon jungkook#jungkook scenarios#jungkook college au#jungkook#bts smut#bts angst#bts imagine#bts fic#bts scenario#bts x reader#bts x you#bts fanfic#bts
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☆ iixch production
Simon and the great cockblock
synopsis: Titan (simon’s great dane and everyone’s favorite canine) is pushing boundaries, and there is only so much Simon can allow. But when Titan becomes an official cockblock, his owner has had enough.
warning: curse & smutty
more Titan shenanigans: pt.1 - pt.3
He wanted it to be special, it was your second year anniversary of being with you and he needed it to go just the way he knew you would love it. He made all the necessary reservations, arrangements and plans so when they day came everything would go as planned.
and everything did in fact, go as planned,
almost.
You had just made it back to his home from your
dinner at the restaurant. You both dined wonderfully, and wined just enough so that you were both loose and relaxed than before.
Coming in he closed the door and was instantly on you, having you cornered between himself and the front door.
“Can’t believe you wore this dress just for me,” He says with a dark grin as his hands go to your waist. Pulling himself closer against you, and in turn your back on the door as he goes to press his lips against your neck. “Such pretty wrapping paper for the gift underneath,” He murmurs between kisses.
Your hands wrap around his shoulders, baring your neck to a side, inviting his affections. “Mm, I know I hit the nail on the head with this years gift,” You say with a chuckle.
“Every year with you is a gift, sweet girl.” He says pulling back from the skin of your neck to your eyes, his right hand slithering up your side to then hold your jaw. “Can I kiss you, love?”
You smile and chuckle to his chivalry. “You better kiss me,” You tease as you pull yourself tighter against him, your dress and his dress shirt the only material between you two as he leans down kissing your lips.
Every thought in his mind is a thought of you. Every desire coursing through his body is desire for you. Every breath he breathes, is in need of you.
So of course he’s oblivious to the fact he forgot to put Titan in his cage. But he’s reminded when as you’ve just opened your mouth enough for him to delve deep-
Bark!
Followed by Simon grunting as Titan pushes him behind the back of the legs.
“The fuck-” Simon pulls away from you and immediately scowls at the appearance of the canine. “I forgot to put the big shit in his cage.” He huffs.
“Awww, hi Titan,” you say going and bending down to pet the big loving dog. “You missed me?” Titan of course sits politely so you can pet him, tail wagging and eyes wide.
Simon glares at Titan as you slip away from his hold to pet the damn dog.
“I’m going to put him in his cage,” Simon says grabbing Titan by the collar to guide him.
“No, don’t do that. He’s a good boy, just let him be. You and me can just close the door to the room.” You tell him as you give Titan a kiss on the head before standing up. “Be nice to him.”
Simon rolls his eyes, before pulling your hand and guiding you through the house to his bedroom. Muttering annoyed by the canines presence, as Titan follows you two. When you both enter the room and Titan tries to follow, you gingerly close the door before he can enter.
Simon, trying to push the interruption behind him, sits down on the edge of his bed, before calling you over, “Love, get over here.”
With a smirk and a smile you walk over before sitting yourself down on his lap. “You should just focus on me, ignore the distractions,” You tease as your hands behind unbuttoning his shirt.
Simon huffs at the remark, his hands sat on your thighs as they gently knead and glide deeper under your dress. His lips curling into a smirk as he watches your breathes become heavier, your eyes fluttering and grip just a tad tighter.
“You should focus on cumming when and only when I have my cock in that needy pussy.” He whispers harshly in your ear, as his hands meet the lacy material of your panties, and traces your outline with a tantalizing finger. Your hips shifting against the spine shivering touch. His finger slipping past the lace edge and he groans when he’s met with your wet squishy entrance. “Ain’t no better way to celebrate than fucking you good, huh”
You were going to respond but you have to close your mouth to avoid moaning so deprivingly when he pushes through his thick middle finger and curling it up inside you, his thumb you your clit.
“Ha- you call this..fucking?” You push him on as you feel your hips twitch under his touch.
He pushes another finger, the stretch burning so good, a soft gasp leaving your lips. His other hand goes to the zipper of your dress, and in one harsh swift movement he unzips it completely, the material falling down and collecting at you hips.
BARK BARK BARK
The sound of scratches to the bedroom door and repeated barking interrupts the moment.
Again.
This time Simon in physically irritated, and you wouldn’t had been bothered to care until you feel Simon remove himself- leaving you feel empty and needy.
“Si, come back,” You huff and pout when he softly turn to leave you on the bed, but standing up himself.
“Let me put that damn mutt in his cage so that I can properly take care of you, love,” He says as he walks over to the door. Before he can walk outside, Titan rushes in.
Immediately going to the bed, where you’re sat in the middle. Despite your need you have to laugh and the dynamic between the two boys.
“Your such a big clingy baby,” You say watching as the Great Dane comes up to you in the bed, snuggling into you and resting his head on your thigh. Your hand goes to his head and pets him.
“Y/n i’m trying to get him out of the room.” His voice agitated. He would had been more patient with the situation if he didn’t have a painful hard on strained under his clothes.
“He doesn’t wanna.”
“To hell with what he wants, I want you.”
You laugh, “Ok, ok,” you hop out the bed, becoming Titan. “Come on boy.”
And as if an invisible leash connected him to you, he obediently follows you to the room. Tail stuck high as he passes Simon. To which Simon sneers, “Cockblock.”
Titan had allowed you to cage him, with a handful of treats, and a good amount of head pats. Letting you and Simon finally indulge in each other without the worry or distraction of Titan in the way.
Simon swears Titan plans and coordinates his interruptions and disruptions, little does he know how right he is.
#ghost call of duty#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley fanfiction#ghost x reader#ghost x y/ n#ghost cod#ghost x you#simon ghost fluff#simon ghost riley x you#simon ghost x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost simon riley#ghost smut#ghost mw2#ghost#simon riley imagine#simon riley cod#simon x reader#simon riley#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#cod x you#cod ghost x reader#ghost cod x reader#simon riley x female reader#simon riley x y/n#simon riley smut#simon riley fluff#titan shenanigans
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my take on divorced!john fancying the nanny <3
he’s not fully in the clear yet. he’s separated from husband wife, she’s fully moved out and signed over custody of their son to him. all they’re waiting on is the divorce papers to be rustled up
it’s not uncommon for him to ask you to stay for days on end, caring for his son and watching over his home when he’s away on short-term deployment. more than happy to pay whatever it costs him. always comes home to spotless house and his boy ready to greet him at the door
except this time, when the mission wrapped up earlier than expected. his flight landing in at an ungodly hour so his arrival is unknown to you. the house is dark when he gets in, dead quiet just as he expected considering how late it is in the night
his footsteps are light, even lighter once he starts tripping over toys and his son’s playpen still strewn about in the front room. he’s not used to coming home to this with you about. he’s not mad by any means, but he can definitely feel the added personal touch you’ve let lingering on his home
he finds an empty tub of ice cream on the coffee table, his ice cream to be specific. it was unopened when he left and here it sits in front of the tv with the spoon still in it.
cheeky, he thinks. he begins to wonder how much of his stuff you pinch and replace before he gets home. he’ll make sure to tease you on that in the morning, watch you fluster before he laughs and ruffles your hair. ensuring you that you can have whatever you want of his, darlin’
when he stops in the bathroom to shower, he finds your bras and panties hanging up to dry next to the medicine cabinet. he can’t help the way it makes his stomach twist in a deliciously achy way. not because of the juvenile inclination that he’s seen your undergarments
but because they’re yours, and they’re hanging up in his en-suite bathroom. makes him wonder where you’ve been sleeping for a good few seconds before he actually switches on the bedroom light and sees his covers strewn about
another secret of yours revealed to soon. you’d complained about the sofa being uncomfortable to sleep on when he was away in a passing comment. his original plan was to buy a more comfortable pull out bed for his office
but this is much better. his sweet nanny curled up in his bed, drooling into his pillows. what side do you sleep on? do you occupy the place which originally belonged to his ex-wife? or do you stuff your face into his pillows, breathing in his musky scent?
he only wishes you didn’t wash the sheets before he came home :(
he finds you in the nursery, curled up on the rocking chair with a blanket on your lap and a book hugged close to your chest. snoozing peacefully alongside his son who was dozing in his crib. he checks on the infant, pressing a kiss to his forehead before making his way to you
the book you’re reading is the one he’d left on his bedside table with his reading glasses. some non-fiction book about the Cold War he reads before bed. he tucks it under his arm before reaching down to scoop your sleeping form up from the rocking chair
the blanket once covering you slips off, pooling at his feet and it takes everything in him not to let out a groan and wake you up when he sees you sleeping in nothing over this his boxers and his old lieutenants t-shirt
the engraved ‘Price’ branding your chest is simply an omen of good things to come :)
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I came out to my dad as bisexual at 14 and I was PANICKED because I had a crush on a guy in my Boy Scout troop and thought I was Going To Hell Forever and he was so kind and understanding of my distress, but he had NO idea what bisexuality was. He just said “yeah but you like girls too? This is normal. Everyone is like this.” And I love my dad and trust him with my life to this day and the idea that the concept of bisexuality had not occurred to him had not occurred to me so I put it off.
By 16 though I had a crush on like THREE boys. Three entire boys in my Boy Scout troop. I felt like my sin was slowly advancing, until like an untreated cancer it had become metastatic. I remember bawling my L’il limp-wristed sissy eyes out in his big rumbly truck on the way home from a scout meeting and him telling me that it was OK, that he still loved me if I was gay, but that he knew I wasn’t gay because I still had crushes on women and that meant I was straight. I didn’t quite know how to explain that those felt *~*different*~* and that I felt like I was losing a fight to evil inside me but I again felt comforted by his reassurances and his genuine fatherly love.
At 18 I was like “hey I’m realizing all my friends are going on missions. I don’t wanna do that. Idk how to say that and I don’t have a ‘good enough’ reason to not wanna go.” So I just put it off. Again, my parents were extremely supportive of the information I gave them (I blamed it on perpetually forgetting to start the paperwork.) and one day my mom texted me that she had done the paperwork for me! And that all I needed was to get a physical! So I did that (it was awkward af tbh, my hernia check was done by a trainee doctor and she spent like 3 minutes fishing around my inguinal canals before her attending rescued me) and was sent to Mexico City where I learned that in addition to dipshit himbos with strong hands and scruffy guys with artistic hearts I was REALLY into chubby Latin men with strong personalities who bullied me a little when I lived in Mexico.
I remember my first companion got annoyed with me during an argument and said we were just gonna wrestle and whoever won the wrestling match won the argument (I stg I am dead serious this happened.) I was like…SWEATING when he tore off his tie and threw his white button-down shirt onto the ground (I won btw, don’t ask me how).
I remember one of my companions with this really intense, almost manic energy telling me that he was gonna make sure I was safe in a new area I didn’t know very well. He cooked breakfast for me and we’d go shopping together on P-Days and in the mornings before breakfast he’d jog around and do pull-ups with his shirt off and I’d do anything but look at him because my face would break out in a sweat so intense he’d think I was crying and come over to see if I was OK and somehow make it worse. He let me play D&D with myself in the evenings even though it was against mission rules because he knew how lonely and stressed I was.
I remember one of my companions was a big chubby man with a loud voice and a great sense of humor. He was kind and direct when addressing conflicts with me, and always bragged about how he knew the secrets of women’s minds and it felt like he really did since it almost always boiled down to “Treat Them Like People and Love Them a Lot. Don’t Stop Being A Person For Them. Also Eat Them Out Sloppy Style.” Our P-Day activities sometimes felt like dates, and it seemed like he was more attentive to my emotional state than I was since he was always the first to suggest we slow down our Divinely Mandated, God-Ordained, Super Sacred Work and Wonder to get a snack or check out a Pawn Shop (I love Pawn Shops).
I remember another companion who asked me to bully him every time he did something against his goal of losing weight. It was like he gave me Carte Blanche to take out my crush on him by being a nuisance and I LOVED that. I remember having a breakdown one day after we’d spent the afternoon frantically cleaning our disgusting-barely-habitable mission house to make it look less vile that it was (not our fault imo?) and I started bawling and he pulled me into a hug and he smelled good and he told me he knew it wasn’t just the house and that I was mad at him for being a Huge Dickhead for about a week (true) and that he would work on it. (He’s also a huge chaser but that’s a separate thing.)
I remember one of my companions waking up early (and our schedule is already built for sleep deprivation) to make me a “birthday cake” from knock-off Nutella and bread. He used matches for candles and woke me up, lit the ‘candles,’ pulled them out, then smashed it in my face and took a bunch of pictures while I was still madrugada and disoriented as fuck. He had the same sense of humor as one of my HS crushes and I could push his buttons pretty easily which was so fun.
I came home from my mission and started back at BYU where I became actively and aggressively suicidal. I had a stalker the year I moved up there and my dad’s solution to that was to get me a gun. I know he wouldn’t have bought me a gun if he could have read my mind, but I had a loaded pistol under my bed during a trifecta faith/sexuality/gender crisis and that was not helpful. I remember that the day I decided to kill myself I figured I’d call the BYU CAPS and see if I could get into therapy because it felt like what I was “supposed to do” so I could check my suicide boxes. My therapist was the guy who’d helped me pick a major the year before and was this drop-dead gorgeous Hawaiian man who cried when I told him how I’d been feeling.
A few weeks into therapy I met another stunning man with soft eyes and a scruffy illegal-at-BYU beard he kept pushing his luck with. He was funny, kind, patient, married, and wouldn’t give me the time of day if he knew I was crushing on him. We were in my history of psych class, which was inarguably the worst psych class I have ever had, and we studied together for every assignment and test and I realized that my feelings for him and for all the men I’d already mentioned were in direct conflict with my faith and relationship with God. My already agonizing spiritual conflict became even more wretched and as a result of this plus some other tightly-packed experiences with Mormonisms bullshit, I left the church.
After leaving the church I decided to move back to AZ and transfer to ASU. My mom helped me get a dog since I think it had started to dawn on my family that my mental health was barely getting me through the day, and she knew that we both loved dogs. Madi made my last year at BYU livable while I got my shit together and transferred. In that last year, I went on a date with quite possibly the only semi-openly-out trans person on BYU campus. It was not a great date imo, I was not doing well, but the person I spoke with was fun and fascinating and talked to me about Gender Dysphoria and it really cemented my need to go. To leave and never come back to that fucking school.
I started at ASU a month after my last semester at BYU and within a very short time frame it felt like I was coming back together, like a puzzle magically putting itself together in an environment that wasn’t slowly draining that puzzle’s will to live.
On the 4th of July, the year I started at ASU, I saw a transition timeline photo of a gorgeous happy beautiful happy radiant happy woman and her former Mormon missionary self and I realized the light that was on in her eyes was the light that was off in mine. I looked into transitioning for 3 days, sleeping about 10 hours total during that time. I started talking to other trans people on Reddit (one of whom is now my beautiful fiancée @cintailed) and after about a month of making preparations to be disowned and kicked out, something I was not sure would happen but was ready to go through to Turn On The Lights, I came out to my family and it was amazing. I started HRT a month after that. I secretly dated some dorky guys for about a year while I applied to grad schools. I got into a great grad school for me and my needs. I got FFS. I did my trainings and classes. Me and my fiancée moved in together after some LDR shenanigans. We’ve lived together now for 4 years of basically marital bliss. We have a cat named Grandmother Esmeralda Weatherwax who bites the hell out of my feet about three times a day. My bi-cycle continues to be part of my life but now it’s not as scary. Baby gays in my life have started to look to me for advice. Idk how this all happened so fast. When the years, months, weeks, days, and hours seems to crawl by so slowly now they are rushing past me so fast it’s almost bewildering. Whereas before I felt like I was living on borrowed time, past my ‘expiration date,’ now it feels like I can Fucking Breathe. I’m training myself to slow down now and it feels worth it to Live In The Moment.
Idk why I wrote this. Idk why these thoughts only seem to come up on Sundays when I’m supposed to be writing my dissertation. Idk why I’m crying rn or why I feel so happy. I’m gonna post this shit then get on with my dissertation I guess. Read more Terry Pratchett and give yourselves the time you need. Get a pet. Talk to someone. Re-examine the events that brought you here. Be gayer. Love y’all 💕
#tgirl swag#worm#mormon#lds church#church of jesus christ of latter day saints#boy scouts#Mormon mission#Mormon missionary#elder#the book of mormon#bisexual#transgender#trans stuff#trans pride#lgbt pride#bi pride#mental health#BYU#pets#my cat#cat#dumb cat#granny weatherwax#terry pratchett
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CAN YOU PLEASE, PLEASE ON MY KNEES WRITE ABOUT BITCHY!READER X RAFE AND IT'S SMUT?? I FEEL LIKE YOU'LL DO IT JUSTICE!!! thank you
you literally read my mind because i was just thinking of this prompt that works so well with bitchy!reader!! hope you'll enjoy <3 (if it’s bad, look away!!)
WHATEVER SHE WANTS | Rafe Cameron

MASTERLIST (Oneshot)
Pairing — Rafe x Bitchy!Kook!Female Reader
Content — 18+, power/dominance play, p in v, doggy style, orgasm denial, and dirty talks
Word Count — 2.2K
lıllılı Whatever She Wants by Bryson Tiller
You always wanted Rafe.
It's your right. Since you were a child, you demanded the best in everything—toys, clothes, boyfriends. They had to be perfect. Had to be yours. And yes, it may come off a little superficial but who cares? It's what you deserve, and it'll be hell if you don't get it.
Since the first look, when you caught Rafe lounging on a chair with his friends, tipping the rim of his beer onto his lips, while his eyes scanned over the room in an attractive lazy way, you knew you had to have him. It didn't help that you were competitive, and Rafe garnered attention with women. They flocked to him and begged for a minute of his time. It became a game to you, and that heightened your need.
Everything was calculated. The makeup you wore, the outfits you curated, the glances. You always timed your arrivals—when you knew Rafe would be watching the door—and marked your exits. You knew exactly what to wear—dresses that tantalizing exposes your ass, but only as a preview—and the cosmetic style he liked. Rafe's the type of man who believes he wants a bare-faced woman, but truly, he wants something natural that enhances your features.
You came with friends. You left alone. You drank enough to loosen your nerves and danced with the crowd, but not enough to make a fool of yourself. You knew your tolerance and knew Rafe didn't like a messy girl.
At least, in public.
You caught his gaze a couple of times, flashing a flirtatious smile over your shoulders, but never lingered longer than three seconds. Rafe can't know how easy he can have you, because Rafe, like most boys, loves a chase. You're not easy, you're spoiled. He had to come to you.
And he did.
Rafe tried to introduce himself on several occasions. On those nights when you're leaving early—as planned—Rafe would cut to the door to pay a parting remark. "You're leaving so soon?" he would ask, "Alone? Again?" He would add. You always told him it was because no one caught your eye, and Rafe took that as a personal challenge. He would then try to tell you his name, as if he were different, to which you nod—detached—as if it didn't matter.
It drove him insane.
Because you didn't offer the same courtesy. You kept him guessing. He had to finally ask around to learn your name, which he would use to tease you the next time he saw you. And he did. And you laughed. But you acted like you didn't care. Like all the trouble he went through didn't prove a thing. That's when Rafe knew he needed you.
Tonight's no different. Just as you're about to leave, Rafe catches you with another smooth pick-up line. You just giggle. He studies how your eyes crinkle with amusement, the curve of your lips painted in his favorite shade of lipstick, and the lithe tilt of your head to the side as you ask him with your gaze, is that the best you got?
It isn't. But Rafe's determined to get further with you tonight. He continues to talk, asking about which men disappointed you and the reasons for your constant disappearances from these parties. And, for once, you're answering his questions with little resistance. Perhaps, it's because of the amount of cheap wines you consumed, or maybe you—for once—are tired of the games and want it to come to a fruitful end. Because when Rafe finally asks to take you home, you don't say no.
The walk to his truck is brisk. His arm wrapped around your waist, directing your path, while his fingers trail over the backless cut of your dress, producing a buzzing feeling beneath your skin. He's whispering something in your ear, but all of it is incomprehensible as you revel in the feeling of his touch and his touch alone. The feeling of your game coming to a conclusion.
And, just as you're about to reach the car, Rafe slams you into the side of the vehicle with a searing kiss.
His mouth catches yours and everything feels perfect. As if the buildup leading to this precise moment had been worth it, and every needy emotion rises to the top. His hand travels down the length of your body, to your hips, pulling you closer, and needing to eliminate all the space and wait you made him do.
Rafe's movements are swift and controlled. One of his hands props open the backdoor of his car, pushing you inside, and laying you against his leather seats. All without breaking the kiss.
"You don't know how long I wanted this, wanted you," Rafe blubbers between wet kisses. "Seeing you at every party, in these tiny dresses, not being able to touch," he rasps, bundling the hem of your dress into a tight fist. "Tell me you wear them for me."
"And if I did?" You say with a moan, tipping your head back to grant him access to your neck. "Did you like them?"
"Of course I did," he murmurs against the curve of your neck, the vibration of his words sending heat straight to your core. "You dressing up for me like my own perfect doll."
You want to retort that it's him who's in the palm of your hand, but Rafe sucks on a sensitive spot, causing your eyes to roll back and a whimper to escape your lips instead. He grabs your wrists with one hand, throwing them over his shoulder as he pulls you flush against his chest.
"So pretty, so fucking untouchable," Rafe kisses down the length of your throat, his fingers collecting the spaghetti straps of your dress before sliding it down the slope of your shoulders. "I'm going to fuck you so good."
His words snap you out of your haze. And while Rafe continues to expose more of your body, lamenting each reveal of flesh with a kiss, you withdraw enough to grab his attention.
"You're not fucking me in a car."
"What?" Rafe breaths, unable to snap out of the trace you had him in. Delirious with want, his mind warped around the idea of you being so close to attainable, that all rational manners left his system. He tries to kiss you again, to resume the moment, but you pull enough to send him a deadly glare, pouty and spoiled.
"Rafe, take me somewhere nice or we're not fucking at all."
He can't believe what he's hearing. He can't believe he's contemplating it. But Rafe doesn't understand that you have it all planned out to result in a perfect moment. You won't let it be disrupted just because Rafe can't drive the extra mile to take you somewhere nice. You'd rather leave him with blue balls.
"Are you serious?" He asks slowly, his eyes drawn to your swollen lips, the little pout, and the desperation to have them back on his. Sure, Rafe's had girls who wanted something more than a casual fling. He had them ask him for a better spot, but he never obliged. He never cared. But you're different. He wants you, and it's been a hell of a chase to get you here. He'll be damned if he lets it slip away because of a pretentious standard.
"Does it look like I'm joking?" You cross your arms over your chest, pushing your breasts further up. He nearly groans at the sight. "We're not having sex here."
"The nearest place has to be at least a fifteen-minute drive," Rafe argues. And it makes you upset, brows pinched together. "We can just—"
"I don't care," you snap. "Take me somewhere nice or I'm leaving."
You're serious. He sees it on your face. Rafe can't risk that, despite wanting to protest, because he knows he if he messes this up, he won't have another chance. Swearing under his breath, he drags himself out of the backseat and into the driver's side, pulling the car out of the parking lot.
Dangerously, Rafe speeds down the road, while you're sitting in the backseat with a self-satisfied demeanor, fixing your makeup through the rearview mirror. Occasionally, Rafe spares a glance through the same reflection, connecting with your gaze, and while there's subtle bitterness coiled in his chest, he recognizes the bigger prize at hand.
And what he can do with it.
Because, despite your bratty attitude, Rafe is a person who wants control. You want perfection. You two can have both.
That's how you find yourself in a newly-booked penthouse suite at one of the bougie hotels in Kildare, your head digging into the soft comforter of the bed, your ass in the air, as Rafe drills into you from behind.
When you reached the room, everything moved frantically. Rafe slammed you against the nearest wall to kiss you again—needing your lips, needing your taste—while his hands roamed over your dress and pulled down your cleavage, revealing your tits. Your hands wandered down his pants, unbuttoning them hurriedly, needily, and he assisted you by pulling them off alongside his boxers. His cock was big, slightly red with a pearly bead of pre-cum that rolls off the tip. And you could tell by the look on Rafe's face that he wanted you to suck it.
But you told him, "I don't do blowjobs."
So fucking pretentious.
It didn't matter. He hauled you over to the king-sized bed and pushed you onto the mattress. You landed with a soft thump, while Rafe hauled you up to your ass, pushing up your dress, until it became nothing but a bundle around your waist. His movements were urgent, and he wanted—no, needed—to be inside you because a bratty girl was going to be a great fuck.
And he was right.
You're perfect. The way you wrap around him, the way he sinks inside you. He doesn't know if it's because of the delirium of wanting you so desperately, of chasing you for so long—but he never had better pussy. And it doesn't help that your moans are sweet, breathy, and loud—begging him to go faster.
"Such a pretentious brat," Rafe grabs your throat, hauling you upwards till your spine rest on his chest, airway constricted by his harsh grip. "Making me wait this fucking long."
"R—Rafe," you mewl, eyes rolling to the back of your skull at the way he's angling his cock deep into your cervix, bullying the sensitive spot over and over again until you're seeing stars.
"Had to get the princess treatment, did you?" He murmurs hotly into your ear, nibbling a spot on your neck as you rest the back of your head on his shoulder. His thrusts grow more erratic. "Had to make me earn you, didn't you?"
"You weren't going to fuck me in a car," you persist, and despite how cockdrunk you became, and how much of an attitude you're willing to sacrifice to feel good, you were still adamant about receiving what you deemed enough. He respected that. "I'm not one of your whores."
"But I'm fucking you like my own personal slut. Is that any better?" He bites the lobe of your ear, and his other hand wanders up to grab a handful of your breast, squeezing the fat before rolling your perked nipple between his fingers. You moan louder. "What does that make you?"
You can't seem to answer him, can't seem to find your senses. The words Rafe uses are vulgar, but there’s still no regrets about this entire thing. Rafe wanted you so badly, that he was willing to spend hundreds of dollars on a hotel he probably won't even stay the night in. All because you demanded it.
You win.
"Shut up," you stammer, your stomach tightening. "Shut up and just fuck me, Rafe."
Rafe grins. The hand playing with your tits slips between your thighs to assist, finding your clit easily as he rubs it with his thumb in sync with his thrusts. Breathy moans escape you as you arch into his palm, while he pistons deeper inside of you, bottoming out.
"You sound so pretty, doll," Rafe murmurs against your heated skin, "Come on, take my fucking cock."
Everything’s so dirty. The way he handles you, the way your wetness drips down your thighs, the way his words breathe onto your skin and tighten your core. But you love it. You do, but you're not willing to give in so easily. No matter how good it feels. No matter how much he feels like a prize.
"You don't deserve me." You whisper with a mewl, body tightening with the familiar wave of your undoing.
Yet, Rafe merely grins.
"But you're sucking in my cock like you need me," Rafe taunts, pleasure coursing through his body at the way your walls grip him in a vice. The way your words spark challenge and invitation. He knows, despite your spoiled attitude and pretentious demands, he'll do anything to get another chance like this. "Now, behave like a good girl or you're not coming tonight."
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#rafe cameron#rafe obx#rafe x reader#rafe outer banks#rafe imagine#rafe smut#rafe fic#rafe x you#rafe fanfiction#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron smut#obx fanfiction#obx fic#obx x reader#obx smut#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x y/n#obx#rafe cameron x female reader#outer banks#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron and you#rafe cameron and reader#rafe cameron and y/n#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron fanfic
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imagine construction worker! toji being in the crew who’s helping you build your dream home.
visiting every week to almost everyday because it was your only way to see him, the thought of just asking him out never came to mind. you weren’t exactly as slick as you thought, however.
it’s when you only approached him everytime you had a question did he realize you had a thing for him. not that he minded, though. he liked how flustered you’d get when he’d flex his biceps or when he’d grunt extra loud if he sensed you getting near.
the way you took so much time to prepare talking to him was cute too. how your throat bobbed up and down before clearing your voice; gently poking his arm (intentionally) before muttering his name.
toji would pretend not to hear at first, and ask you to repeat until you were practically yelling- only because he liked the sound of his name with your voice.
if honest, he didn’t actually know the answers to half of your questions. like how you didn’t know what the stuff you were asking him about meant anyways. for both of you, it was just an excuse to hear each other’s voices a little longer, and to see each other before your house gets complete.
it’s so obvious to his boss and co-workers that you’re absolutely smitted, like he is with you. it frustrates them when the building process fails to meet the deadline, having to work overtime because of a little work romance.
it doesn’t bother you though. there was nothing wrong with staying at your grandma’s a little longer. and he had no problem ditching his friends to have lunch with you.
yet, when the house does get finished, you felt a sense of loneliness, failing to remember that you can still contact each other outside of work. he becomes gloomy too, but watching you walk around and surveil the interior made him proud to have taken part in making your life better.
you’re about to thank all of them when he pulls you aside and brings out a little flip phone, almost like a bread crumb in his hands. his lockscreen was a low-quality photo (fitting to his ‘old-man’ persona) but 3 figures were you able to make out: two furry friends and one young boy in between.
it takes you some time to realize that the picture isn’t him as a young boy, but rather this child. you glance at him, his face practically sweating bullets and a shaky grin on his lips.
“this probably isn’t the best time to say this but, do you want to go on a date… someday? an actual one this time- i mean. i’ll introduce you to my son, and hopefully we can take things further now.”
#© ― bea's#anime x reader#x reader#jjk fluff#toji fushiguro#toji fushiguro x reader#jujutsu kaisen au#jjk au#toji x reader#toji fluff#toji drabble#toji imagine#jjk imagine#jjk x reader#reader insert#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x fem reader#jjk x male reader#jjk x gender neutral reader#toji zenin#jujutsu kaisen toji#jjk toji
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You Try to Sleep on the Couch after an Argument with: Cater, Floyd, Silver, Rollo
Other parts: Housewardens ; Vice-Housewardens ; First-Years
Cater Diamond
The argument had been unexpected. Cater was easygoing, always quick with a joke or a teasing remark to smooth things over, but tonight had been different. The tension had built and built until, for once, neither of you had been willing to back down.
So, with a huff, you grabbed a blanket and marched to the couch, making a big show of snuggling in and getting comfortable. It wasn’t comfortable—not even a little—but your pride refused to let you move.
The room was quiet. Too quiet.
Then—ping.
You ignored it.
Ping. Ping. Ping.
With a groan, you reached for your phone, only to find your Magicam notifications lighting up your screen. You blinked. Cater had tagged you in a post. And then another. And another.
The first picture was of your shared bed, completely empty. The caption? lonely boy hours :’(
The second? Cater lying dramatically on his side, clutching a pillow like a heartbroken lover in a tragic romance. send thoughts & prayers, my partner has abandoned me
The third was even worse. A close-up of his face, his lower lip jutted in a ridiculous pout, captioned simply: is this what heartbreak feels like???
You stared at your phone, torn between laughing and crying because what the hell, Cater???
You tried to ignore it, but then another notification popped up. The newest post? A dramatic black-and-white shot of his hand reaching for the empty side of the bed. missing you rn. come home.
You buried your face in the pillow, groaning. He was so annoying.
And yet—your feet were already moving.
When you pushed open the bedroom door, Cater was sitting up, phone in hand, eyes flicking up to meet yours the second you walked in. His pout deepened, exaggerated and just barely pathetic enough to make your resolve crumble.
“You’re insufferable,” you muttered.
“But you love me,” he singsonged, setting his phone aside and opening his arms wide, waiting.
You tried to fight it, but the corners of your lips twitched despite yourself. That was all the encouragement he needed. With a soft, satisfied hah, Cater wrapped his arms around you the second you got close, pulling you into a tight hug.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured, his voice quieter now, warm against your skin.
You sighed, resting against him. “I’m sorry too.”
He squeezed you a little tighter before pulling back just enough to reach for his phone.
You rolled your eyes. “Cater.”
He grinned, not even pretending to feel guilty.
A second later, your phone buzzed. When you glanced at the screen, there it was—a final post. A simple picture of your hands together, warm and steady beneath the sheets.
reunited <3
Floyd Leech
The argument had been bad. Not the usual push-and-pull of Floyd’s unpredictable moods, not the teasing jabs that sometimes went too far—this had been real, raw, and biting in a way that made your chest ache.
You knew better than to expect an apology right away. Floyd wasn’t wired for that. So, with your pride stinging and your patience worn thin, you grabbed a blanket, made your way to the couch, and flopped down with your back stubbornly turned toward the bedroom.
Which, in hindsight, was a mistake.
Because if you’d been facing the bedroom, maybe—maybe—you would have had some warning before the Floyd-shaped projectile came flying toward you at full speed.
A thud, a weight collapsing onto you, and suddenly your whole world was Floyd—arms, legs, and far too much Floyd as he sprawled across your body like a particularly annoying weighted blanket.
You let out a strangled noise. “Floyd—”
He didn’t move. Didn’t even pretend to move. Just settled more comfortably on top of you like this was the most natural thing in the world.
With a grunt, you attempted to shove him off, but he was all lean muscle and deadweight. He wouldn’t budge. Worse, he refused to look at you, his face half-buried against your shoulder, arms loosely draped around you like a net that would tighten if you tried to escape.
“…Seriously?” you huffed, exasperated.
A long silence. Then, barely above a mumble—
“Sorry.”
You blinked. “What?”
Floyd finally shifted, but only to grumble into your neck, voice muffled against your skin. “You’re my shrimpy. I thought you’d get it.” A pause, then a quiet, almost begrudging, “…But I guess I was a little mean.”
You sighed, the last remnants of your anger melting into something softer. Floyd wasn’t the type to say sorry outright. For him, this was already pushing it.
With another sigh, you gave up and wrapped your arms around him.
Immediately, Floyd perked up, and before you could prepare yourself, he bit you—just a little nip against your shoulder, affectionate in that ridiculous way of his. When you startled, he looked up at you, grinning now, sharp teeth on full display.
You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t fight the small smile tugging at your lips. “You’re the worst.”
“And you love me~”
Unfortunately, he was right.
With a tired chuckle, you pressed a kiss to his forehead, feeling the way his grin softened just a little. He snuggled closer, his grip tightening around you, and just like that, the argument was behind you.
Floyd let out a pleased hum, already half-asleep. “M’keeping you here forever.”
You weren’t even going to try fighting him on that.
Silver Vanrouge
You still weren’t entirely sure how you had managed to get into an argument with Silver of all people. Silver, who was usually so calm, so patient, so utterly unbothered by most things. And yet, somehow, words had been exchanged, tempers had flared, and now you were lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling, stubbornly refusing to acknowledge the pang of guilt gnawing at you.
The night was quiet, save for the occasional rustling of leaves outside your window. You closed your eyes, willing yourself to sleep—
Tap. Tap. Tap.
You frowned, cracking an eye open.
The sound came again, a soft pecking against the glass. Dragging yourself up with a sigh, you turned toward the window—only to be met with the sight of the cutest little bird, perched delicately on the sill.
You blinked. The bird tilted its head.
It had a tiny note tied to its leg.
Cautiously, you opened the window and untied the parchment, unfolding it with careful fingers.
"Sorry."
Your lips parted. You stared at the single-word apology, written in Silver’s neat, earnest handwriting.
Before you could fully process the sheer adorableness of the gesture, a rustling noise caught your attention. You turned your head just in time to see a squirrel scurrying up onto the windowsill, a small piece of paper clutched in its tiny paws.
It held it out to you.
You took it.
"Sorry."
You pressed a hand over your mouth, overwhelmed by a mix of affection and disbelief.
Was he seriously sending an entire woodland brigade to apologize for him?
And, perhaps more importantly—if you didn’t go talk to him right now, would he escalate this? Would an entire procession of deer, rabbits, and possibly a very regretful-looking bear show up next?
You sighed, rubbing your eyes. There was no way you were sleeping now.
Before you left, you rummaged through your cabinets and grabbed a handful of nuts, scattering them gently on the windowsill. “I don’t accept free labor,” you muttered, watching as the squirrel eagerly took a hazelnut before scampering off. The bird gave a happy chirp before fluttering away.
With that taken care of, you made your way to the bedroom.
The moment you stepped inside, he was already sitting up, eyes immediately locking onto yours. He looked a little sheepish, his usual composed demeanor softened with quiet guilt.
“I’m sorry,” he said, without hesitation. “I shouldn’t have let it turn into an argument.”
You exhaled, the last remnants of your irritation slipping away entirely. He was so sweet, so sincere, and you couldn’t even be mad anymore.
Stepping forward, you leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. “I’m sorry too,” you murmured. “Now, let's go to bed."
Silver didn’t argue. He simply nodded, slipping under the blankets, his expression peaceful now.
As you settled beside him, he hesitated for only a moment before murmuring, “Did the bird get to you first or the squirrel?”
You let out a quiet laugh. “Bird.”
He nodded, thoughtful. “I was going to send a rabbit next.”
You buried your face into his shoulder, shaking with silent laughter. “Go to sleep, Silver.”
And finally, you both did.
Rollo Flamme
The argument had left you drained, annoyance simmering just beneath your skin as you curled up on the couch, pulling the blanket over yourself with a sharp tug. You didn’t want to be this upset—Rollo could be infuriating, stubborn in ways that tested your patience, but you knew he didn’t argue without reason. Still, the weight of his words, the heat of the exchange, had made retreating seem like the best option.
At some point, exhaustion overtook frustration, and you drifted into uneasy sleep.
But then—dry throat, groggy mind—you stirred awake, an undeniable thirst pulling you from your rest. With a sigh, you pushed the blanket aside and padded toward the kitchen, the dim light of the apartment casting long shadows against the walls.
That’s when you noticed it—the faint glow beneath the bedroom door.
You hesitated, frowning. He was still awake?
Curiosity, or maybe guilt, urged you forward. Carefully, you peeked inside.
Rollo was pacing. Back and forth, hands buried in his hair, tension lining his shoulders. He looked wrecked—a man on the verge of either an epiphany or a breakdown.
Your heart squeezed.
You hadn't expected this. Hadn’t expected him to be just as shaken, just as restless.
Stepping inside, you barely made a sound, but he noticed instantly. His head snapped up, eyes widening.
For a second, he didn’t move. Then he took a step toward you, hands twitching at his sides, reaching out just barely before curling into hesitant fists. He stopped himself, as if afraid you’d pull away, as if unsure whether he had the right.
Your breath hitched. The sight of him—always so composed, now uncertain—made the last of your irritation fade.
Wordlessly, you closed the distance and took his hand.
The moment your fingers intertwined, you felt the tension in him unravel. His shoulders slumped, his grip tightening around yours, a quiet exhale escaping his lips. He held on like he needed the touch to ground him.
“I took it too far,” he murmured, voice raw with sincerity. “I shouldn’t have—”
“I know,” you interrupted softly. “And…I shouldn’t have either.”
His gaze met yours, searching, still unsure. You squeezed his hand, and that was all it took.
Rollo relaxed, expression melting into something exhausted, something relieved. He nodded, as if accepting an unspoken truce.
Neither of you needed to say anything else.
When you led him to bed, he followed without question. And when you pulled him into your arms, his body molded against yours with an ease that made it clear just how much he had needed this.
Within minutes, the tension that had kept him awake finally loosened its grip. His breathing evened out, his fingers curled into the fabric of your shirt, and for the first time since the argument, Rollo fell asleep— warm and finally at peace.
Masterlist
#twst#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#twisted wonderland#cater x reader#cater diamond x reader#cater diamond#cater#floyd leech x reader#floyd x reader#floyd#floyd leech#twst silver x reader#silver x reader#twst silver#silver twst#silver#rollo#twst rollo x reader#rollo x reader#rollo flamme x reader#rollo flamme#silver vanrouge x reader#silver vanrouge
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— CAN'T WE BE SEVENTEEN? ; shoto todoroki ; 焦凍
summary: he's loved you since he was seventeen. pairing: f!reader x pro hero!shoto ; reader was a 1-A student tags: mutual pining, heavy make-out, thinly veiled sugar daddy shoto, reader does not go pro, touya might be a dick but he's a hero now, shoto is bad at feelings wordcount: 5.6k a/n: i do not fucking know what came over me, enjoy your food my little todorokinas. yes the title is what you think it is. no i will not elaborate.
You never did go pro.
Truthfully, you thought there would be more pushback when, in your senior year, you announced your plan to pursue a degree in early childhood education with a focus on non-conforming quirk development.
The War changed a lot. It changed you, your classmates, and the world. But, through it all one thing stuck with you:
What if someone helped Tenko Shimura?
How different would his life have been? How different would history have spun?
You graduated at the top of your class and joined the faculty at Chiba Prefectural Preparatory School for Quirk Specialties two years ago.
Chiba Prep was opened eight years ago in response to a societal cry for more infrastructure around what was dubbed "non-conforming quirks": a nice way to say quirks that can injure, maim, or kill. Maybe even all three on a bad day. Some parents still see their child being labeled as a non-conforming quirk user in the national database as akin to social suicide.
You see it differently.
Your quirk allows you to manipulate emotions — anger, sadness, betrayal, love, hatred. If you can feel it, you can sink it into another's psyche deep enough to drive them to act. You can even imbue things with feelings. For example, a cup of warm milk can transform into more than just a simple comfort, now it can hold the feeling of home and safety, or even exhaustion strong enough to put even the biggest foe to rest.
You could easily use your quirk with nefarious intent.
You could steep hatred in someone's bone so deep it drives them to harm themselves. You could sew fury so solid into someone's mind it drives them to violence.
Just a touch and you can control others with something so intrinsically personal it only exists within themselves: their feelings.
What makes you any different from little Asuke, a shy little girl with a quirk that allows her to see people's greatest fears, and then manifest and control them? You're convinced she can use this for good, if only with practice. In your mind, her future is bright and glimmering. Perhaps she will become a therapist, focusing on exposure therapy? Or, maybe the most prolific horror novelist in their time?
Or, bright and sunny Tao — a transplant whose parents sought out Chiba Prep's specialized education — whose heteromorphic quirk makes his bodily fluids, namely saliva, eat through nearly anything but his own biologics. A sneeze is quickly the most dangerous thing in the world for the cheery, lizard-bodied class clown.
He's just a boy given a quirk that needs more care.
He isn't a villain-in-training.
None of them are.
It's important to teach them that young — and as their teacher for Year 3 of their elementary schooling, you aim to hammer that in as much as possible. They deserve to feel normal. To feel loved and supported. They aren't scary, they're children.
So, you take it upon yourself to insist on pushing for privileges like field trips. There aren't many public spaces that welcome the classes of Chiba Prep with open arms. Over the years, there have been plenty of incidents. But, a day trip into the city to visit Tokyo's Hall of Heroes is green-lit with bubbling excitement from both faculty, the children, and their parents.
You usually keep your history as a graduated member of Class 1-A quiet.
After all, you never did go pro.
And even still, Shoto Todoroki never stopped thinking about you.
He remembers that weekend everyone moved back in for their last year before graduation. He remembers you smiling at him, and helping him drag up a duffel of luggage from the common room to his dorm. You made a joke about how you're sure he got taller over the summer, and how his hair is longer now. You said you liked it.
It was the beginning of the end, then.
His crush was a silent, smothering thing. It made it hard to think. Shoto had enough on his plate thanks to Touya's acceptance into the Villain Rehabilitation Program and his father's insistence on staving off retirement. Not to mention his parent's divorce — no matter how amicable, it was still a separation. Add on training, tests, studying, finals, and j-term classes... And a desperate, writhing, burning crush on the nicest girl in class?
Touya's elbow digs into Shoto's side.
It drags him back to reality — to the stifled quiet of the historical Hall of Heroes.
Suddenly, the doors to the wing squeak open, and a tour guide ushers in the elementary school class. The buzzing excitement and wonder are visible on each of their faces as the attendant — one of the HoH's lead tour guides — excitedly explains the newest, in-progress addition to the Hall:
Endeavor's wing.
There's a whisper of awe that ripples through the children as their teacher and co-teacher follow, and as the class moves through the large, open space. They're staring up eagerly at the gilded statue in the center of the room. It's larger than life and intimidating. Years ago, Shoto might have had to fight the odd tremble in his knees at the reminder it brings: to be small in his father's shadow again. But, things are different now.
Very different.
Touya scoffs. "I thought this wing wasn't open to the public yet."
"They're just children," Shoto hums, turning his back on the gaggle across the way to inspect the large mural winding along the back end of the installation, "I'm sure it's—"
"Oh, ho, no way!"
Shoto quirks his brow at his brother's outburst. His elbow digs into Shoto's ribs again.
"Ain't that the pretty girl you never got the balls to ask out your senior year?" comes the rasped drawl of his older brother's voice. Touya is clearly amused, his white hair hanging in his eyes as he leans forward to squint, "She is cute, Sho'—"
"Shut up," Shoto grits, turning his head over his shoulder; he tries to bite back the flurry of nerves that ignite in his gut, "Stop talking."
It is you.
You look... good.
Happy.
You're crouched by a small, timid girl in the back of the crowd. Your hand is in hers, and you're pointing upwards at the large paneled screens replaying Endeavor's most historic fights. You're explaining something to her, your knees bent as you squat. You look... the same. As if in the six years since they graduated, you sat still in time.
For a second, it's like he's seventeen again.
It's his senior year, and he's stuck at the corner of the gym's edge with a half-empty glass of punch in his hand. The lights are low, and there's slow music playing. His tie feels too tight. Bakugo keeps telling him to 'ask her to dance already', and Kirishima is considering bashing his head through the wall. Even Midorya is trying to persuade Shoto.
"It's prom, man! C'mon, this could be your last chance—"
Touya is about to be a real pain in the ass — his favorite pastime — and make some comment about your ass, but when he turns to lob the one-liner at his baby brother, Shoto's gone.
Shoto is on the move.
The crescendo of gasps draws your attention first.
Then, the cry of "WOAH, IT'S SHOTO!" leaves you dumbfounded. The rippling murmur of excitement bleeds into the children as their eyes — and the eyes of the tour guide — widen at the sight of the approaching Pro Hero.
Shoto Todoroki.
He looks... good.
Really good.
He's a bit older, and a bit more filled out than when you were both teenagers. You can see the strength in his arms and shoulders — it's a distant echo of his father's physique, though Shoto is so much more elegant and much... prettier. He's always been.
For a second, you're seventeen again.
It's your senior year, and you're sprawled across Momo Yaoyorozu's bed.
They had finally wrangled out of you who your crush was: something they hadn't been able to do in all their years as classmates.
There's a sticky, Miss Midnight-themed face mask clinging to your expression as you try to flip through the large magazine in your hands as nonchalantly as possible. Mina's voice, as she paints Ochaco's nails a bright pink on the floor, is sweet and saccharine as she looks up at you.
"I think you and Shoto would be, like, the cutest couple ever."
You're still crouched when the tour guide nervously — like she was caught doing something naughty — introduces The Pro Hero Shoto to the already-aware crowd of elementary school students and their teachers. It's like igniting a match; the uproar of excitement leaves you laughing as three of your boys push forward to bombard him with questions about his quirk.
Asuke is smiling shyly, now. That's a small win. She's intrigued by the appearance of a real hero, not the "scary statues" — and her big, fat tears stopped rolling the moment you laid a gentle hand on her to quell her anxiety over the new environment with a push of comfort through your quirk. She unhooks her pinkie finger from yours as you guide her towards your co-teacher.
"Boys," you call with a crisp air of authority as you stand and lead Asuke toward the bulk of the field trip group, "What have we learned about personal space?"
"It's fine, really, Insight," comes Shoto's voice; as warm and placid as you remember.
"Insight?" mutters your co-teacher at the presumed hero-name; a look of confusion plasters itself on her face, and her big, feline ears perk up. She leans in to whisper in a way that borders on conspiratory, "Do you two know one another?"
"Old classmates," you confirm, not daring to get into the finer details.
Shoto's attention is entirely rooted in the way you manage the kids. There's something beautiful about the ease with which you handle the bouquet of students; you quell the excitement into a manageable decibel like it's as easy as breathing.
"Shoto," you start as you gesture to him, "Has a very special quirk — Toyamai, he has ice like you. And, fire like Tojiro. He can regulate his temperature. Can anyone tell me what that means?"
There's a wave of hands shooting up, a few me, me, me's rise from the gaggle.
You're using him as a teaching moment.
Shoto's smile is soft.
You nod at Ogomi, excitedly nodding as the reserved child speaks up. Normally, he hates public speaking. But, recently, he's started working with the speech pathologist during lunch. The boy bounces a little as he answers. "He doesn't g-get too hot, or too c-cold."
"Exactly! Isn't that cool?" you grin at the lazy attempt at a pun, "This is why it's important to learn about our quirks as much as we can!"
Touya thinks this whole thing is just too cute.
You're different than he remembers — but, granted, things were sorta different last time he saw you. He was a little too busy tryna kill his old man and lil' Shoto. He's different now, too. A changed man! A real licensed hero. Support items and all.
He hangs back.
He... I mean, he is a jack-ass but he isn't gonna ruin this for Shoto.
...It's kinda cute.
Just about as cute as Fuyumi said it was.
Apparently, Shoto had opened up to her and Natsuo about his feelings after graduation — about how he regretted not doing anything about it. Fuyumi then told their mum, who then off-handedly mentioned it to Touya... and well Touya dug in because, duh, he is a whore for good gossip. He might be the family's black sheep, but Shoto is the glue that binds.
And he deserves to be happy.
Your co-teacher is ushering the kids to the next installation — a viewing of All Might's Legacy, a new documentary following the retired pro's teaching career. It will be a good wind down for them, in comfy seats and the dark. It's hardly the sort of content an elementary school student would find riveting, but it is All Might. And they love him.
You hang back.
Shoto's heart is hammering in his chest.
"Hey."
"Hi," you greet back, closing the door to the theater and stepping forward as you weave your arms around you, "Long time no see."
"Yea," Shoto breathes, his hands in his pockets as he meets you halfway across the museum's marble floors, "I... I see you're teaching."
His eyes are as pretty as they were back then. Slate grey and piercing turquoise. "I'm in my second year," you confirm softly, fiddling with the material of your sweater, "Congrats to your old man."
You gesture up at the statue, then wave around to the rest of the installation.
Shoto inhales, then nods; he's staring at your face, blissfully realizing you're just the way you were all those years ago. Kind. "I'll pass it along."
"How's he handling it?" you ask, your eyes raking across his expression and trying not to stick to the sharp slope of his jaw, or the bob of his Adam's apple, "Retirement, I mean."
"He's happy, I think. Touya and I are working together and... things are... good."
Last month, Endeavor finally retired. He cited his age, and his dedication to passing his legacy to his two sons: Shoto and Touya. Shoto has planted himself firmly within the Top Ten in the last year or so, and shockingly, Touya isn't far behind. People love an underdog's redemption story, you suppose.
And the underdog in question can read a room.
This is getting a little too sexually tense for even him.
"Heeeeey, girl," he rasps out, staggering backward with a thumb over his shoulder, "Nice t' see ya. I'll let you two catch up, yea? I'm gonna go pop my head into the theater, see how the kids are handling the snooze fest on screen—"
You jump.
How long has he even been there?
"Hi, D— Touya," you strain, wincing a little; the rehab'd villain doesn't seem to mind.
"Hi, teach'. That cool with you?" he asks, wobbling his thumb and quirking a pierced eyebrow; it's comical, like he's trying to disarm you with humor, "Don't want you thinkin' I'm corrupting your youths—"
"It's fine," you breathe, ignoring the sting of age-old mistrust. You know better. Shoto wouldn't be here, with him, if Touya Todoroki hadn't changed. Endeavor wouldn't be entrusting his legacy to the ex-League of Villain member if he didn't believe in his capacity for good, "Just don't be disruptive."
Casting judgment on someone whose life was nearly destroyed by his own non-conforming quirk would go against everything you taught the kids anyway.
"Touya's whole thing is being disruptive," Shoto grits as his oldest brother slips silently through the doors, "I apologize for him—"
"No," you wave him off, laughing a little, "Don't. It's... nice to see you two together."
Shoto's expression is soft as he wanders a little closer. "It took time — and a lot of therapy — but we've all managed to come out the other side."
"That's great to hear, Shoto," you breathe, your eyes flitting across his face, "I'm really happy for you."
There's a long silence, then — and you can't help but ignore the roil of butterflies in your stomach. The eye contact is heavy with some unspoken thing, and both of your tongues are weighted by secrets-never-turned-confessions.
It's like finally this dance you've been doing around one another for years breaks — and the two of you throw caution to the wind at the exact same moment.
"Would you like to—"
"Are you free—"
Hesitant, slow grins bloom on both your faces.
"Dinner?" is all he manages after a sweet moment of soaking up your soft smile, "If you're available...?"
You make yourself available.
Yaoyorozu almost dies when you call her that night — winded from tearing through your entire wardrobe. You explained you had nothing to wear a-and you needed something nice, and you only have an hour to get ready, because Todoroki — yes, stop screaming, Todoroki — is picking you up at 8pm.
Little bro is nervous. Touya can tell.
From his spot on the sofa, the white-haired ex-degenerate scoffs. Natsuo is digging around for some cufflinks in Shoto's dresser.
"Seriously, Sho'? A suit?"
"It's a nice restaurant," his brother says tightly, adjusting the collar of the black button-down, "I booked the upstairs dining room for privacy."
"Who the hell told you t' do that?" Touya quirks a skeptical brow.
"Father was the one who suggested it."
"...That old dog."
Natsuo rolls his eyes at the exchange before throwing his hands as he emerges from the closet. "Do you have any links that aren't emblazoned with U.A. High School's crest?"
The ones in Natsuo's hands have his graduation year on them.
Shoto winces.
"Want me to ask dear ol' dog of a dad?" Touya snarks from the corner, his posture becoming less and less upright as he scrolls on his phone.
"Already did," comes the soft voice of Fuyumi; she's smiling, padding into Shoto's room with a velvet box, "He offered up his nicest pair. He also says not to screw it up with Insight. He likes her."
Of course, he likes her. You worked under Endeavor for a brief work-study period during your third year. Shoto remembers hearing grumbled praise over dinner one night about your talent for de-escalation.
"You told him who I was seeing?" Shoto asks incredulously, taking the box and working the cufflinks on. He's starting to feel exasperated.
Fuyumi nods, popping down beside Touya.
"He asked. I'm not gonna lie to him."
"Did y' tell ma?" Touya rasps, peeking up over his phone to inspect Shoto's outfit. Not half bad, honestly. He looks good in all black. A man after his own heart, "M'sure she's gonna be real excited—"
"Yes," Shoto grumbles, "I called her earlier—"
"Chiba Prep is a really good school, y'know," Natsuo buts in as he tries to find a tie that matches Shoto's outfit. Ultimately, though, the middle brother decides against it and tosses the options over his shoulder, "They're, like, on the leading edge for quirk therapies."
"Hey, nerd? Quiet down. The big kids are gossiping," Touya shirks, turning back to Shoto, "What did mum say?"
"She wants me to call her after—"
"One, you're gonna call mum the morning after," Touya raises a finger, "Because if you don't get laid, I'll be so fuckin' disap—"
Fuyumi slaps Touya's chest. He lets out a pained yelp at the solid smack.
"Uh, ow," he rubs his sternum. "An' two, take a deep breath. You look like you're gonna shit yourself. Those are my pants and they're expensive."
Shoto lets out a long breath.
Fuyumi's smile is sweet like honey. "Aw, Sho'! It's gonna go great. You two have known each other for such a long time, and catching up is going to be amazing. Just be yourself! Confident and kind—"
"—Hold the door open for her, and pull her chair out," Natsuo adds as he adjusts Shoto's collar for him, "Car door, too—"
It's Touya's turn. He's dead serious. "—And do not chicken out on kissing her at the end of the night. I swear to god."
Easier said than done.
You never did go pro.
Those years of hardened battle instincts have lost their edge. You try to remind yourself this is just Shoto, not The Shoto — but you're a little lost in the whole celebrity of it all when he picks you up in a very nice, sporty little car with ENDVRplates.
You answer the door and he forgets how to breathe.
He has flowers for you. They're blue and blooming and beautiful.
Fuyumi's contribution.
You settled then you were going to kiss him at the end of the night.
The restaurant is... nice. Really nice. The sort of nice you could never aspire to experience on your teacher's salary. Even the valet is a concept that has your head spinning. But, Shoto handles it all with cool ease. The entire time, his hand is settled on your lower back.
It feels like you've been lit on fire.
You're glad Momo was able to create a dress fitting for the occasion. It's sleek and black. Comfortable, too. Not much can be said for your heels on that front, but it's fine.
Somehow, Shoto managed to book the entire upper floor of this place in all its glimmering glory — it's just the two of you alone in a sea of tables.
The waiter is pouring you a glass of the chef's suggested pairing of sake.
You thank him, smile, and take a sip as Shoto unbuttons his suit jacket and watches you.
For a second, you're seventeen again.
Sero and Kirishima were always in cahoots when it came to parties back then — somehow, between the two of them, they always managed to smuggle enough booze onto campus to obliterate any semblance of promised sobriety from even the most stoic members of 1-A.
You remember one night, after a lot of hounding, you finally gave in and joined a few of your classmates on the back lawn for a few drinks.
A few beers turned into a cup or two of wine, and then another big gulp of whatever deranged jungle juice concoction Kaminiari managed to cook up. It tasted terrible, but you were too drunk to really care. Shoto was no better. He was nursing his fourth drink of the night — a rarity he was even drinking at all — and seemed completely fine with the way your arms brushed as the two of you sat close in the grass.
He was always so nervous around you. Now, he just seemed... happy.
"I can't believe there is only one week left until graduation."
Graduation day was the last time you saw him.
Until this morning, that is.
You smile into your drink.
"What?" you ask when his eyes never leave your face.
His fingers twitch towards his own glass. Shoto blinks, then rolls his jaw. He was caught staring. He clears his throat, looking a bit shy. "Nothing."
"Nothing?" you press playfully, cocking your head to the side.
"You..." he starts, then bawks. You're stunning, and it's making it hard to even think straight. He thought these feelings might have mellowed out over the years but seeing you again has just reignited everything. He feels like a hormonal teenager again, "You look beautiful."
Your expression falters into something lovesick. You chew your lip. "You're not so bad yourself, Todoroki."
He manages a half-smile. "Touya had me worried the suit was a bit much."
The idea of Touya offering him advice on his outfit strikes a chord in your heart. It makes you smile even bigger than before. "Well, you can tell Touya that I like it. A lot."
You rake your eyes up and down him. On purpose.
He notices.
Shoto's face feels hot.
He tries to shake the bone-deep want that has swept his entire body up in its grip, but it's difficult when every single word out of your mouth reminds him just how in love he was with you back in school. You explain, excitedly, why you chose to teach at Chiba Prefectural Prep and catch him up on where you've been living since graduating. He's pleased to learn you're still in the area, living in the city, and decidedly in love with the commute to the school.
Shoto's always been a good listener — but you can see how much he's changed when he begins to speak about his career. He seems so much more sure of himself than he was all those years ago. It wasn't that he was... unsure... but, no. He was shy. Quiet.
Now, less so.
It's adorable.
Dinner comes and goes with conversation over sushi that is far too good for you to even process. It's easy talking to him. It was easy talking to Shoto back, then, too but... Things are different. You're both different. Not in a bad way, but in a way that feels like coming home.
While you both wait outside for the valet, Shoto shrugs his jacket off and puts it over your shoulders without a single word. Suddenly, you're cradled in a warmth that's very Shoto — his cologne clings to the collar and you bury yourself a little deeper into it.
Shyly, you step closer and steal his hand. It's calloused and warm. He laced his fingers with yours as if practiced. You bite back a grin. You give his hand a little squeeze when you spot the car coming around the corner.
His silence is calming — and he squeezes your hand back. When you look up at him, you realize he's already looking at you.
His face is close. It's so... intimate. Very. Nearly better than a kiss.
But, you've wanted to kiss Shoto Todoroki since you were seventeen.
The valet driver interrupts the moment with a respectful call of Shoto's name and offers the keys with a shake of the hand. With a little bit of hesitancy, Shoto remembers the thing Natsuo said — the car door, too — and moves around the passenger side to open the door for you.
It's sweet.
Really sweet.
The car ride back to your apartment is punctuated with easy conversation — you ask him about Bakugo and Midorya, and you're pleased to hear they're both doing well. He asks about Momo, and if you still keep in touch with Mina and Ochaco. He smiles to himself when you admit you did call Momo for help with an outfit.
"She did a beautiful job," Shoto breathes, a palm moving from the gear shift to brush over the dress' fabric on your thigh.
His hand settles there.
Your stomach does a flip.
You chew your lip, swallow down a sudden burst of nerves, and let your hand rest over his. You squeeze it. Shoto tries to focus on the road. His gaze drifts for a moment at a red light, his heterochromatic eyes dancing across your figure.
Keep it together.
He isn't seventeen.
He's twenty-five. He's a Professional Hero. One of the Top Ten in all of Japan. He's more than capable of keeping it together in the face of physical touch from the woman he's dreamed about for years.
...Right?
Green light.
His hand is still on your thigh when he pulls up to your apartment.
The touch is relinquished in favor of putting the sports car in park.
It makes your chest ache.
Shoto swallows thickly.
Do not chicken out on kissing her at the end of the night.
He'll never forgive himself. But, admittedly, he's bad at this. He's not good at reading body language, or even knowing himself enough to realize he looks mildly terrified as you blink up at him in the passenger's seat. His heart is hammering a mile a minute.
What if you don't want to kiss him?
When would he even kiss you? Now? Or at the door?
Why does he feel like he's going to die?
"This was really... Shoto, are you okay?" you ask as you unbuckle your seatbelt; you pause, your brows knitting tightly.
"What?" he asks, blinking back to the present moment. The look of fear disappears, "Sorry. Yes. I'm fine."
You're working his jacket off your shoulders, gently leaning to fold it neatly in your lap. Your voice dips low, into something playful. "You didn't look fine..."
"I—" Shoto clamps his mouth shut as he leans an elbow on the center console, "Sorry. I suppose I'm just nervous."
"Nervous?" you grin, a little giggle punctuating your words as you wriggle in the red, leather seat, "Why?"
Your expression makes his expression crack. He ducks his head as he huffs out a laugh. You continue to egg him on via expression alone. "I... Stop it."
"Stop what?" you push some more, your back pressed to the door as you face him in the car, "You're the one being weird—"
"I'm not being weird—"
"Then what's wrong, Shoto?" you tease in a sing-song voice.
"I'm nervous because I want to kiss you."
His words are punctuated by a slow look that takes in every inch of your face. Butterfly wings kiss your stomach walls. And your knees. You feel a little tremble in your chest.
It feels like someone has sucker punched you square in the sternum. Shoto's no better. He isn't entirely sure what the expression on your face means. Is that... good? Are you happy?
Your voice is a little quieter now. You duck your head and fiddle with his suit jacket as you lean back against the seat, a little closer now.
"You don't need to be."
Shoto's breath catches at that.
So, he makes his move.
His hand comes first — his calloused palm settles nicely against your face, his thumb brushing your cheekbone as his pointer finger brushes the underside of your jaw. Shoto is slow. Methodical. It's like he's trying to ground himself in the moment.
Truth be told, he thinks he might be blacking out.
Your eyes flit up his wrist — a dark leather band around his wrist with an expensive watch face, a dark dress shirt with glimmering cufflinks, strong arms and a broad chest, and you can see the dip of his collarbone where the top two buttons of his shirt remain undone.
He looks so damn handsome with his sharp jaw, pretty eyes, and his trademark white and crimson hair. Even his scar is beautiful.
The touch pulls you in like he's got his own personal orbit.
Your elbows are braced along the center console, your eyes flicking across his face as his fingers continue to brush along the soft expanse of your cheek. You wring your fingers together.
Then, his eyes stick to your lips.
"Can I kiss you?" he whispers, his breath fanning across your face.
You never did go pro.
But, Shoto did.
It shows.
Because, at this moment, all you can do is nod feebly before you're swept into the sort of kiss people go to war for. It's the sort of kiss that sticks to your ribs, that feels like warm, fresh food. It's the sort of kiss that would drive you to the brink, that would make you nod and agree sure, let's get married and have three kids, let's name one after your father, and paint the house blue like your mother's favorite flower—
His mouth is eager, but not in an overbearing way. It's gentle. Slow. As if he needs to remind himself this is real and not some midnight fiction that leaves him aching and alone. Shoto reminds himself to be tepid, pliable, and easy, which is easier said than done when somewhere deep inside of him there's a seventeen-year-old screaming in victory.
It's better than anything he could have ever imagined.
And then you whimper.
It's a sound tied between bliss and relief and it's muttered against his mouth as you lean in and let your fingers brush the fabric of his dress shirt. The tips of your fingers brush his abdomen and he flexes, the feeling foreign and warm. It warrants his other hand to drift to your face and you break for a breath; he doesn't care that there's lipstick smeared across his mouth. He's kissing you again — this time a little bit more feverish, a little bit more aching.
You melt against him, this time your hands trembling to grip his wrists.
He needs to slow down.
He is not having sex with you in his father's car.
That's shameless.
He needs to slow down.
He has to, or he'll lose himself in this and he refuses to fuck this up.
Shoto's breath is ragged when he finally peels himself away, his lip parted and eyes half-lidded. His grip on your face is still so soft, so gentle. It's very him.
You're glad you didn't do this when you were seventeen.
It would have permanently altered your brain chemistry, you're sure of it. How could you ever kiss someone else again after that?
He's rubbing your cheek with his thumb. You swallow, and try to level out your breathing. It's hard when he's still so close, when he's so... perfect.
"I've wanted to do that," he murmurs against your cheek, "Since our last year at Yuei."
A well-kissed smile breaks across your face. You reel back, your nose wrinkling as you shake your head in disbelief. Shoto is smiling. A real smile. The sort that's so rare you can count on one hand the amount of times you've ever seen it in person.
"Are you serious?"
"Very," he says, chastely pressing another to your other cheek as he leans back.
"Me too," you admit shyly, "Can we... do it again sometime?"
Shoto's eyes widen incrementally. Then, his smile eases back onto his face.
"Are you free this weekend?"
"I can be," you reply easily with a honeyed look, "And I will be. For you."
"I get off patrol on Saturday around seven," he explains before asking timidly, "We could... do dinner again?"
"Works for me," you breathe as you move for the handle of the car door, "After all, I never went Pro. Weekends are free."
Shoto scoffs.
Then, as you open the door and swing a leg out:
"Oh, and tell Touya I thought the suit sexy."
Shoto's laugh is dry. You leave his jacket on the seat and scurry into your apartment with a lovesick wave. He swears he sees the silhouette of a familiar ponytail greet you at the door, but he doesn't dwell on it. He waits until you're inside and the lights to the front door are shut off.
Then it hits him. He has another date with you this weekend.
Not so seventeen anymore, Shoto Todoroki.
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