#my blog is a personal diary at this point what even is this post

[diteach]

Practicing a beauty sport when you're ugly as hell grants you a place in heaven btw

[bugsandslugs]

season 2 of Arcane already has me in a chokehold and there's only 3 episodes out rn ughhh need more soon or i'll die (i say this as i'm rewatch it for the 4th time sigh)

[britneyshakespeare]

can’t stop intellectualizing about barbie

[simandy]

So, someone I'm following with my personal blog is very mad at a thing that happened to them and, because of that, I've learned (more like "confirmed") two very important things today:

Tumblr (ig, twitter, tiktok, any social media) is NOT your freaking locked diary;

You've GOT TO learn how to be comfortable with the fact that you are NOT the only person on the internet.

This website is not a private place. Your blog isn't a secret tomb. Even if you're a small blog, everything you post as PUBLIC is PUBLIC. Anyone can access it one day and you cannot do ANYTHING to prevent it from happening, unless you post that thing in private, so only YOU will be able to see it. Please, only post stuff that you are OKAY with other people seeing.

Learning to understand that you are not alone is tied to the above paragraph. A person from the other side of the globe exists in this place with you. They're here. There's nothing you can do to prevent them from "stealing" your information, your ideas, your concepts. And if you're posting all of those without a patent, you MUST be comfortable with the fact that they can all be stolen. That someone will be faster than you to publish your entire story just because you actively told them. There's no "but I told them not to steal in my card/my TOU 😭!!! Loyal followers, cancel them immediately!!!" that will stop a real person from doing that.

I'm sorry for triggering any anxieties or paranoia, but at this point, I'm really just trying to protect you. And I'm talking to you as an adult who is a writer and an artist myself, who has been online since 2009. I hope you can take this as an adult too.

Be safe and protect what's valuable to you, please.

[ausantana]

The Role of The “Weird Girl” in Movies

Written by: Au, also known as @ausantana on tumblr

click below to read more! ↓

Introduction 🪱

Nowadays, the trope of weird girls in movies has begun to become more visible, and as a society, we are beginning to increasingly normalize teenagers who identify themselves as "weird" or "awkward" and there is nothing wrong with both words unlike how they used to be used previously.

Types of weird girls ⭐️

There are various types of "weird girls", however they are usually categorized into 5 types (although in my opinion the complexity of each person goes far beyond each of these labels, and although we as teenagers try to fit into a specific type, we will always have characteristic features of each of these characteristics and personalities)

The goth

Known for their dark ways of dressing and acting, they mostly have alternative and gothic tastes.

Moodboard!

Characters: Lisa Frankenstein, Lydia Deetz, Nancy Downs & Morticia Addams

The Smartass

They are known above all for being sarcastic and having a great sense of humor, they tend to be the intelligent and smart ones.

Moodboard!

Characters: ‘Lady Bird’, Janis Ian, Robin Buckley & Kat Stradford

The Awkward

They are known either for not talking much or for talking too much, they are usually introverted for the most part and overthink all the time.

Moodboard!

Characters: Melinda Sordino, Carrie White, Juno Macguff & Nadine Franklin

The Basket Case

Normally, they tend to be girls who go through such a strong trauma that they express an unhealthy obsession through competitions, whether it be a frustrated dream or substance abuse. They are also called "the lost cause."

Moodboard!

Characters: Nina Sayers, Pearl, Daisy Rondone & Marla Singer

The Space Cadette

Those girls who are given the term "weird" for being daydreamers and being in their own world, are usually absent-minded.

Moodboard!

Characters: Luna Lovegood, Cassie Ainsworth, Cecilia Lisbon & Davina

Movies and Series with the weird girl representation on it 🎥

- Dinner in America (2020)

- Juno (2007)

- Lisa Frankenstein (2024)

- The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012)

- Lady Bird (2017)

- The Edge of Seventeen (2016)

- Fleabag (2017)

- The Craft (1996)

- Beetlejuice (1988)

- The Virgin Suicides (1999)

- Little Woman (2019)

- Speak (2004)

- Girl, Interrupted (1999)

- The Diary of a Teenage Girl (2015)

- Garden State (2004)

Songs attributed to “weird girls” on social media at the moment 💿

- The Promise - When in Rome

- Teenage Girl - Cherry Glazer

- Watermelon - John + Jane Q. Public.

& more!

Video in representation → millionhawks on TikTok has perfectly represented the feeling of not fitting in anywhere, the typical attitudes of this trope such as awkwardness, overthinking and other things are also present in this video!

Which I absolutely love, as it also represents weirdness from a real point of view by adding characters from movies known to audiences familiar with this topic.

(Click on “video in representation” so you can watch the video!)

So this is my third post on this blog! I hope you liked the brief analysis I made about this plot, because I am another example of a weird girl.

I would like to encourage you to follow this blog if you want to see similar content, because even though I am not very well known on this platform, I would like to create a space full of people with the same tastes and interests as me, feel free to comment, give your opinion and ask questions in the comments of this post and any other!

I have a question for you readers! So feel free to reply: What kind of weird girl are you?

I myself am the composition of the 5 types, but above all, the awkward and the space cadette.

Xoxo, Au.

[fubukiiisss]

hi, this is just a personal diary of mine, kind of, just silly rambles nothing too serious. that’s about it 🧍🏻‍♀️

the reason i left loa was, it was/ is tiring, mentally. persist? in what? sats? void? 3D/4D?. what i hated the most was persisting, that word alone makes sigh 🧍🏻‍♀️. at some point i wanted peace, i came across vesora’s post i guess, and i was interested.

but the best thing to happen after finding out ND/ AV/ awareness, whatever you want to call it is, is peace? even that is an understatement, i mean i can experience whatever i want but knowing it’s all you? it’s all “ ” its a silly illusion is so freeing. at first it did make me feel like my whole life ended when i read koda’s asks and posts😭. then i dug a little deeper found bry’s (@iamthat-iam <3 ) blog, it was godsend. i actually got an understanding after reading her posts and asks, then i actually understood what infinite.ko’s, illuminated mystic, iam-you’s posts 👍.

ask yourself, right now “what’s my next thought?” what happened? let’s stop the algorithm of thoughts for a second. that brief silence, what is that?

best piece of advice is, just read, ponder, experience.

a big thank you, and a whole lot of appreciation and love for my favorite blogs that helped me so much:

@infiniteko

@iamthat-iam

@i-amyou

@vesora

@onlyhere-onlynow

@eternallyilluminated

[putschki1969]

2024/10/10 Blog post by Wakana おしゃべりガーデン第14回目‼️〜みんなの健康法がスゴイ！寒暖差についていけていない今日この頃〜

❗This is Fan Club EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗Do NOT SHARE on other sites❗ ❗Join her FAN CLUB! Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

Talk Garden Vol.14‼️~Everyone's Health Regimens Are Amazing! I Can't Handle The Recent Temperature Changes~

The temperatures in Tokyo suddenly dropped below 20℃ so I thought it was finally going to get cooler…but it was only for a moment. It seems to be going back up to warm temperatures around 25℃ 😅A temperature difference of about 10℃ between different days is rough in many ways😵‍💫I'm not sure what to wear *laughs*🧥

Hello, this is Wakana (0￣▽￣0)／

How is autumn approaching where you live? I feel that the plants in my house are growing a little slower, maybe because they've been freed from the heat of just a few weeks ago. It's a little sad, but some of them seem to be preparing for hibernation so I need to be more careful when watching over them🤔Watering them will become quite tricky from now on 😇I'll do my best!

Well! Today, I Vol.14 of my podcast "Wakana's Talk Garden" has been uploaded! ＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／ I received many submission about "Everyone's Rules of Healthy Living"! It made me realise how well you all take care of your health😳You didn't only talk about different diets, you also mentioned exercising, regular health checks, trying new things to deal with daily physical problems…I was really impressed by everyone's dedication to a healthy lifestyle!! 😭✨I got the impression that a lot of people ride bikes😊🚴In terms of food, many people try to prioritise vegetables🍅🍆🥒🥕🥦Basic health rules seem to be ingrained in all of you🤔That's amazing…✨

I'm trying my best too, but the fatigue of summer and the dryness of the sudden cold have made my voice a little nasal😓It may be hard to listen to but if you have some spare time, feel free to check out the latest episode. I forgot to mention it in the podcast but I wanted to introduce my recent favourite foam roller. I am using it every morning and evening for stretching 😉It's a small foam roller for myofascial release. Look at the cute colour and size. It's tiny compared to a regular-sized foam roller. It's light and easy to carry! It's small, but it can release myofascia just as well as a regular-sized one!

I've always loved this stretch ball, too. It's a great product that can be used on trigger points. (Trigger points are "hyperalgesic areas, which are where the pain-sensing sensors in the body have malfunctioned, causing constant pain.") Personally, I use it in areas that don't usually hurt but are prone to stiffness. The shoulder blades, collarbones, and especially glutes! My glutes are surprisingly stiff! (By the way, if you want to work on large muscles like your glutes or thighs, I recommend using a foam roller with a large surface area rather than a small ball 😊 The ball is best for small focus areas) I keep these items near my bed so I can use them before bedtime at night, I also keep them in my stretch corner or on the sofa *laughs* I use them whenever I notice stiffness. It's quite painful though… 😇

Thank you to everyone who sent in submissions this month! ! As for the little present for those whose message was read, please expect it to arrive in about a month. I'm sorry to keep you waiting but please be patient😅💦

So! For next month's talk theme I chose: "Everyone's Ideal Autumn Trip". I talked a little bit about it in the episode but last month I went on a trip to Nikko with my mother 🧳I was very excited to be able to visit the nostalgic Nikko Toshogu Shrine 😍It was my first trip in a while and I felt very refreshed. That's why I picked this travel topic for the next episode ♪

Please tell me about the places you want to go or have been to, and the kind of trips you want to take! ! ＼(^o^)／I will of course share photos and a travel diary of my trip to Nikko on my blog soon✏️

And last but not least! I also wanted to talk about the happy news that were announced last week! Next year, on January 15, 2025, we will hold a Kalafina live concert. After seven years, we have decided to sing together again as a trio. 17 years after our debut! We have been encouraged by the feelings of everyone who has always supported us throughout the years. For this reason, we want to stand with gratitude and pride on stage to convey our feelings to you that day. The concert is titled "Kalafina Anniversary LIVE 2025".

We look forward to seeing you at Tokyo Garden Theater next year. Please come and see us!!! ＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／[Note: Unfortunately, Wakana doesn't really share anything specific about the upcoming live. She's bubbly as always when she makes the announcement but no further infos or thoughts are revealed]

All right, that's all for today! Until next time~☆( '▽')/

＊＊＊Wakana＊＊＊

Wakana’s Talk Garden #14

❗This is Fan Club EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗Do NOT SHARE on other sites❗ ❗Join her FAN CLUB! Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

Episode #14 »»—— CLICK ME 🎁 CLICK ME ——«« ・Everyone’s Rules of Healthy Living ・Anything you’d like to ask Wakana/Anything you’d like Wakana to talk about

For next month’s episode which is scheduled to air on November 10th, the following two topics have been chosen: ・Everyone's Ideal Autumn Trip ・Anything you’d like to ask Wakana/Anything you’d like Wakana to talk about

The submission deadline is 10/31.

[vaneshifts]

INTRODUCTION POST

Hello! My name is Vane. I'm 19 years old, Canadian, a Virgo and an ambivert with anger issues.

I've been attempting to shift since 2020, during the pandemic and my own personal crisis that made that year likely the most miserable point in my life. I have not yet shifted, but I have come very close, especially recently.

Below I've listed some of the fandoms I'm "part of" (often I find that fandom behaviour can be rather toxic and try to avoid it), places that I'm shifting, as well as some information about "fictional" places that you can use however you see fit to determine your image of me. I've also listed the rules and expectations of this blog, and if you don't agree with them, please DNI. If rules are broken, you will be blocked.

Favourite Shifting Takes (of mine):

Permashifting; I Know The End by Phoebe Bridgers

Shifting Realities VS Shifting Goals (mindset)

Rules (please consider before interacting):

No anti-shifters

Keep your shifttok logic FAR away from me

No discouraging comments to myself or others

If you think my information is incorrect, please inform me POLITELY, and we can discuss it if you'd like (I generally won't post something if I haven't made sure my information is right, but everyone makes mistakes, so if I am in fact wrong, I'd be happy to correct it)

I don't approve of of any DRs specifically made for killing or hurting people and I do not support them, so do not encourage or speak about them on my page

That being said, I think the concept that you should NEVER hurt/kill anyone in any DR is bullshit, so if it's something like Marvel or ASOIAF, Maze Runner, etc. where it may become necessary, I think that is perfectly acceptable

Race changing doesn't hurt anybody because the reality where you are a different race already exists so leave people alone if that's what they choose to do (but if you do race change, please make sure you're being respectful because other people's experiences are not your costumes)

Shifting to feel loved, to experience a better childhood, to have more control over your life or even just as escapism is perfectly fine. Shifting is a tool at your disposal and up to your own discretion.

Age-changing is fine

Permashifitng is not unhealthy or bad, it is very possible, and if you choose to do it, I wish you all the best

All shifters are valid, including those who haven't shifted yet or who are still trying to reset from all of the misinformation they were likely fed from early shifttok

If I missed anything, I may come back to update this list later

Now onto the more fun part!

Fandoms:

Avatar (not TLA)

Criminal Minds

DC Cinematic

Harry Potter Golden Trio Era

Marauders Era

Good Omens

Game of Thrones

House of the Dragon

Hazbin Hotel / Helluvaboss

The Hobbit & Lord of the Rings

How to Train Your Dragon (Including DOB & RTTE)

Hunger Games

Marvel Cinematic Universe

Once Upon a Time

Percy Jackson & The Olympians (Riordanverse)

Rings Of Power

Shadow and Bone

Shadowhunters

Six of Crows

Star Wars

Stranger Things

Supernatural

She-Ra

The Vampire Diaries

Teen Wolf

The Umbrella Academy

The Witcher (TV series)

This list will probably be added to at some point TBH

Places I Am Shifting To:

Criminal Minds [Tessa Grey]

Harry Potter Golden Trio Era

Marauders Era [Kassidy Bane]

Good Omens [Katerina Tamarov / Kat Tyler]

Game of Thrones [Elaena Baratheon]

House of the Dragon [Chaereah Velaryon]

Helluvaboss [Kat Morningstar]

The Hobbit [Kat Bane]

Lord of the Rings

How to Train Your Dragon [Nerissa "Nessa" Bloodrave]

Marvel Cinematic Universe [Nerissa "Nessa" Love]

Once Upon A Time [Aja Hope]

Rings Of Power [Chaereah]

Shadow and Bone [Katerina Lantsov]

Shadowhunters [Tessabelle "Tessa" Morgenstern]

Six of Crows [Tessa Bane]

Star Wars [Nerys Alastair]

Supernatural [Tessa Hale]

The Vampire Diaries [Tessabelle Hallow / Tessa Hale]

The Umbrella Academy [Number 8 / Kat Hargreeves]

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Patronus: fox

Marauders Kinnie: 75% Sirius Black, 25% Regulus Black

PJO Cabin: 12 (Dionysus)

TVD Species: Vampire

If you have any questions about me, my shifting journey, or shifting in general, please reach out and I will do my best to answer them! Happy Shifting! <3

[lordvonbunnyv]

"Audio Diary of Morgan, cassette six, side one, log four:

Today was veteran's day, according to Victor, it was the day when the Great War ended. too bad I died before it ended.

I got to finally meet Schatzchen in person for the first time and his Tommy friends. they were nice, we sang some songs, he knew "roses of Picardy", "good morning mr Zip-zip-zip", and my personal favorite, "That's the wrong way to Tickle Mary", and exchanged war stories, and smoked some cigarettes and I tried my first beer. the Meriwether family came along too, Mouse made us both Poppy crowns to wear, her grandfather after hearing that Schatzchen lost his iron cross, gifted him one to wear. meanwhile I was given a silver war badge. I was told that the medal was given to soldiers who were honorably discharged due to wounds or sickness.

giving medals to wounded men, I bet they only came up with that medal to make the higher ups feel better about sending those men out there to get wounded or killed to begin with! I have done nothing! why am I getting a medal for literally loosing my eyes!! I couldn't control that! that wasn't courageous! it's a sham!! at least Schatzchen did something to justify his medal! unlike me, Schatzchen actually had SOME control in how he earned his iron cross!

when Victor first read about Schatzchen's story on a blog, I will admit, I did feel jealous of him, it didn't seem fair that a Jerry of all engines would receive more recognition and praise than me, a Tommy who died and lost their innocence too soon. I couldn't help but ask Why? why did an enemy engine that served under the Kaiser escape death, but not me. how come he survived and I didn't? where did I go wrong?

Victor told me that unfortunately, death is not fair. it doesn't matter if you are good or bad, or what you do, death will find you. think of it like a game of Russian Roulette, you know that the bullet is in one of the chambers, but you don't know which one, and who it is going to land on, that's just how death is. Victor also gave me a history lesson about Germany's side in the Great war, he said that yes, Schatzchen was on a different side at the time, but it doesn't matter because at the end of the day, we were both put in the same place, we actually have more in common, both of us were young and lost our innocence to war way too soon, we both lost a piece of us, and we were both serving our country. he also read me "all quiet on the western front" to me to give me a better idea, and yeah, he's right, I should just let my animosity go, it's been over a hundred years now, what's even the point anymore?

While spending time with Schatzchen, I still couldn't help but notice that the war affected us differently, he seemed to have came out on the other side with a strong sense of the value of life, and a sense of Humanity, while I came out with a strong hatred towards humanity for even putting me in that situation. how was he after everything, still able to find a sense of Humanity and care for those humans? how come he is willing to risk his life to save the humans that basically were responsible for his existence? I saw what humans are capable of, I saw the toxic gas and the bombs. what did he see that I didn't?

I will probably never find an answer to my questions. war is a sensless thing, why try to make sense of something that has none? I hope to see Schatzchen again. I do feel a sense of comfort knowing that I am not alone, I wasn't the only one who suffered, it feels such a huge relief to finally have someone who actually gets it.

end of log four,

Morgan"

[Schatzchen belongs to @duncandonuts06 . I know it's very early to be posting a november 11th post, but I don't know if I'm going to be gone on that weekend or not, so...]

[whatepisodesopranos]

I really love The Sopranos and I really loved Sopranos Sunday and I love you all and I already miss Sopranos Sunday so much <3

One person sent a message asking "what's next?" and there are actually a few answers:

I think it's good to let The Sopranos sit and have at least one Sopranoless Sunday, so even if a specific show was on the docket, I don't think anything should be scheduled for this Sunday

Inspired by Sopranos Sunday and Dracula Daily, I am actually working on a blog that will post Lizzie Bennett Diaries videos and social media posts on the 13 year anniversary of when they were originally posted. I finished queuing up posts on this blog back in June and wanted to queue more things and I didn't watch LBD when it originally came out so this was an idea in the back of my mind for a while. The videos will be on realtime LBD and the social media posts will be on realtime LBD social media. Those are going to start in March

as for "what is the next [Critically Acclaimed Drama] Sunday show?" I don't know. I posted a nonbinding poll here a few months ago and then my friend who loves The West Wing and has too many followers got the answer to be The West Wing (imo it has too many episodes, 154 is a 3-year commitment, nearly twice the episodes Sopranos has). I think a good choice is a critically acclaimed drama that has a multi-season plotline, is fully finished, and has 60-100 episodes. And is critically acclaimed for its entire run (so not Lost or Game of Thrones). My top two choices in order are Mad Men and Breaking Bad. I think it would be fun to do Succession again (Sopranos Sunday started in part because Succession ended). Some other options that have been suggested are The Wire, Better Call Saul, Battlestar Galactica (2004), Boardwalk Empire, Six Feet Under, Downton Abbey. I would also do The Sopranos again, this was my first time watching it and it was incredible. I don't really feel like I can just decide just because I ran this blog, I'd love to hear people's input. Most of these are on my list of shows to watch at some point

[xerith-42]

What is, in your opinion, the best and the worst moments of the entire series and why? If you haven't already made a post about that

[cracks knuckles]

It's hard to put a finger on what I would say are best moments because through my rewatch I've actually discovered a lot of good moments early on that I think are overlooked because they don't play into the larger story later on. I talked about one of them in the context of a rewrite on my side blog, but I want to talk about a smaller moment that I actually don't think needs to be rewritten. (this isn't me saying this is the best moment in mcd, just that I think it deserves appreciation)

It's the entire opening sequence of episode 11. Like the whole thing is just really good. It opens with Aph finding out that Donna has gained sentience building that idea into the world, and she gets the story started right away by telling Aph about how Brendan got injured at the end of last episode. Aph instantly rushes in to help, finds out what she has to do from Garroth, and then takes off to do it. Earlier episodes have a problem of being kind of nothing a lot of the time, or Jess will get distracted and take way too long to get to the story, but that just isn't a problem here.

At this point Brendan has been established as a character with gripes, ambitions, wants, love for hamsters, and has an emotional connection to another character in the cast. So both the audience and Aph are invested in his safety, and it's great to see how seriously she can take these situations when circumstances demand it. Furthermore once she gets the medicine Garroth needs, it's Garroth who actually treats Brendan's wounds as this is before Zoey entered the series and became the resident healer.

I really like this aspect of Garroth's character and think it has a ton of potential! Garroth learning battle medicine during the year Phoenix Drop didn't have their lord because he failed to protect his lord before? Maybe he learned it even earlier, like in the guard academy shortly after the death of his brother to ensure that he doesn't lose someone again. As far as I'm aware this is never expanded on outside of this episode but I think it was a really solid piece of character work with Garroth.

And Zenix in this scene?? On point. He is playing up the whole scared guard who's a rookie and new to everything aspect so well, and the way he talks about the whole ordeal is just fantastic. He's so good at playing on Aph's trusting nature and when you learn that he knew the arrow was meant for him and put Brendan in the way? It makes the entire scene all the more heartbreaking. Overall a really great showing from one of the earlier episodes of the series.

And on the complete opposite end of the spectrum, we have one of the much later episodes in the series run that if you ask me, is one of the worst scenes in anything I have ever witnessed. Season 2 Episode 95 of Minecraft Diaries is perhaps the best example of character assassination happening in real time I have ever seen. The rot upon Laurance's character has been creeping in for some time during season 2, but this is when it hits it's crescendo.

I can and will do an entire post breaking down this entire episode minute by minute one of these days because it's failures are something I take personally. For those of you who aren't actually going insane over the block show, Season 2 Episode 95 is titled "Shadows of the Past", and this is the episode where everything with Laurance hits it's breaking point. In this episode while Aph is just having a fun day playing with Dante, Leona, and the other child who is there, she sees an imp in the forest disguised as Aaron. (Keep in mind Aaron died in episode 81 so the wound is still sort of fresh)

Aph is shaken by this and halfway through the episode she sits on the beaches of the Phoenix Alliance island holding Aaron's bandana and having a quiet moment. Laurance comes up behind her, before he sits next to her, and the two start talking. In theory, I like this conversation. Laurance has largely not been able to express his feelings on Aaron and what he did because he ran away right after it happened, and showed up only 5 episodes ago trying to kill Aph while she was in disguise. He hasn't had a moment to really process Aaron's sacrifice and what it means for him. The strange contradictory feelings he has over his jealousy, his desire to protect, the calling, and dare I say it, his respect for Aaron.

In theory, I really like this conversation. In practice this conversation manages to drag not one, not two, but all three of Minecraft Diaries main characters to their lowest points. In this scene Laurance proceeds to berate Aph for her feelings, invalidate previous lines he said about Aaron, completely betrays his own character and motivation, and forever ruins his character arc. And that's not including how much of a fucking asshole Garroth is in this scene, like Laurance was being bad, but Garroth saying "You were lucky to come back alive" after Laurance was forcibly raised into undeath??? Not cool dude.

The entire scene also reduced Aph into just a grieving widow. She's so grief stricken she can't even stand up to Laurance, which could be good in theory, but I just don't like it. It just doesn't feel right. It doesn't feel like the character I've been following. Aph has always been a proactive and reactive character, bad stuff happens and her response is to do something about it. This scene makes her far more passive and while I don't object to her grieving, this just isn't it. I can't explain it better than that, it just isn't it.

As stated before, Garroth may have had some good points but completely lost all merit he had in this argument when he hit Laurance with that line. That was just uncalled for.

And poor poor Laurance. Let's just give a quick rundown on things in Laurance's life that greatly impact the way he views death: His parents dying when he was a kid, his lord dying while under his watch, seeing someone he knew was dead walking around alive, literally actually dying and being forcibly raised into partial undeath with a great curse to bear and no control over any of this happening, his best friend sacrificing their life to save him, AND losing his OTHER parent after being thrown 15 years into the future. Laurance has been a victim of death and it's many ways of truly ruining someone's brain in ways we mortals aren't even able to comprehend.

He would never yell at someone for grieving. He would never get mad at someone for being sad that someone they care about is gone, no matter how jealous he can be. He would never see Aph with tears in her eyes and keep yelling. The only circumstances I could see him doing this under is if the calling is influencing him, but that isn't explicitly shown to the viewer or ever even implied to be the reason for this outburst. We are just expected to take this at face value. That his is who Laurance is, who he has become.

And it's not Laurance. I don't know who it is, but it's just not him. It's someone else who's using Laurance's likeness to prop up the story of two people falling in love and losing each other that takes longer than Romeo and Juliet and manages to somehow be worse than that. In a sick and twisted sense, Jess is how we've all been headcanoning the Shadow King, turning Laurance into her little puppet that she can control to do whatever she wants when the plot demands it, previously established character be damned. She didn't write this scene because she wanted to explore Laurance's character, she wrote this scene so fans would get off her back.

Laurance deserved better than this.

cutting myself off here because if I keep going I will just rewrite this entire episode in real time for the third time

[dearestkong]

reflections // starting the summer term 🌷💌

(feel free to skip … just a lot of rambling about changes of mindset, i’ll sum it up later in my new pinned.)

it’s been more than a month since I’ve started this blog, and I’m really really glad that I did. not because my productivity has spiked or my anxiety has diminished or whatever (though there have been positive effects), but because just attempting to start something like this meant that I was no longer willing to suffer and rot in private. i talked about the “hole of dysfunction and self-hatred” in my old introduction: for so long, that hole was my best-kept secret and my greatest shame. being competent and ambitious was an aspect of my personality, and I couldn’t handle the idea that it wasn’t true.

but then…. dearestkong emerged!! and I started being completely transparent. telling strangers about every day of self-destructiveness. it was a good form of accountability, sure, but it was also a means of telling the truth. this blog has been a way for me to say: i’ve been struggling, and it’s not a fluke or a “flop era” or something entirely disconnected from the high achiever i used to be. the girl fighting off inertia and the girl seemingly doing everything with ease are the same person.

🌷☆彡

my posts have been getting more optimistic recently, and that isn’t a fluke, either. lots of things have happened: i’ve realised how many people support and believe in me, i started taking medication for a problem i’ve had for a while (it’s crazy how the world seems so much brighter now?!!?!), i started writing in my diary again. i’m now 27 days clean from a self-destructive behaviour (this blog isn’t about my relationship with that, but in the early days i used to make a note of relapses and just the fact of acknowledging it felt so freeing to me. it wasn’t something to hide anymore, but a fight i was making progress with.)

this seems like a rapid evolution for such a new blog, right?! but in the next six months, i’m going to be applying to university. i’m about to undergo some of the most rapid evolutions of my life.

🌷☆彡

for so long, i’ve had this vague and unspecified dream: “doing the best” “working my hardest” “impressing my teachers”. now my dream has a name and a face and admissions results attached to it and it’s making me so scared that i want to throw up. when i was in the depths of the hole i couldn’t stop seeing my life as a binary. either i get in, or i don’t. and if i don’t, what the hell is the point of living?

38 days later and i feel a little differently. i am someone who has climbed out the hole of inertia and lived. i have done many things and they’ve all turned out fine— great, actually. i have reason to believe that things will go well.

i still have a pretty nasty relationship with myself, lol. it makes me really happy when people on this blog interact and talk, but they’re all so nice and it makes me feel a little fake. in reality i’m standoffish, awkward, and often mean. i coast by on intellectual abilities while slacking off. i’m a judgemental egoist who is sometimes self-destructive. all of that is true—>

but at the same time, i still have this crazy belief that i deserve the best. it’s literally an overflow of egoism ;;;; there’s nobody i’m more in love with than myself. i think of the girl i’ll be in the future with such affection, and i don’t want her to feel ashamed or resentful of me. she deserves to have her hopes fulfilled!! she deserves the brightest, the best that i can give her.

in conclusion: even if i don’t like the person i am at the present, i have to do it anyway. 1 because there’s no other option and 2 because i love the person i’ll be in the future too much to stop.

🌷☆彡

so from now on, the purpose of this blog is changing slightly. it’s no longer “get out of the hole and survive” like it used to be. we’re past that, we’re already surviving.

now, the aim is to “do my best so my future self can live with no regrets”. that’s not very concise but I’ll work on it.

let’s do this! 加油！

[jessequinnfirstofhername]

The Rules:

Every twenty-four hours there will be another round. After every round, the character in last place will be eliminated.

If there are multiple characters tying for last place, there will be a special elimination round. In these rounds, every character in last place will be eliminated, even if all the characters have tied equally.

When there are only two characters remaining, they will face off against one another in a week-long poll to determine the victor.

If the character that you consider the hottest isn’t listed here, hit the ‘what about ___???’ option and reply to this post with the overlooked character. The character with the highest 'write-in’ votes will be added to the next round. Unless the 'what about ___???’ option is the least voted for, in which case it will be eliminated. Welcome to the party, Dracula and Henry Fitzroy!

I'm counting hybrids and dhampirs as vampires. My poll, my rules.

If you're looking for the hottest vampiress poll, it'll be on my blog, right next to this one.

This is all for fun. Don’t take it too seriously ;)

So long, Stefan Salvatore! You’re boring and I think you’re a worse person than Damon. Ha! There! I said it!

Round Six!

[mimisfortress]

Guess who lost her diary key and is now turning to Tumblr to blog my feelings (me) 🦄🌈

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💞💌Really long VENT post coming your way ❤️‍🩹🪽

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Currently going through an emotional rut.

I feel pretty unsure of myself. I lost a couple of friends and I am having a hard time knowing whether it was my fault or if they had it coming.

These weren't just normal friends, they were family at that point. We witnessed unspeakable things together at a fairly young age and I really, really, really thought that our friendship was forever. I thought our friendship was different from everyone else's in a sense that growing older wouldn't impact us the way adults warned us it would. I thought trauma made us special and I thought change wouldn't find us.

To these friends, I was their baby sister and they treated me as such, too. They dogged on who I loved and did not trust me to make my own choices. They grilled someone who I had genuine love for after not batting an eye at the unhappy abusive relationship I was in for three years.

As I grew older, I grew distant because I was too scared to express that the way they treated me upset me. I figured that since they already have so much to worry about in their lives, my fragile feelings would burden them.

I am aware of the importance of communication, but I simply just felt like I couldn't communicate my feelings to them in any way.

During the past month, our friendship of 9 years came to an end. It crashed and burned when I couldn't make it to a big hang out that costed a lot of money. It was only supposed to be my friend and I, just us two. Luckily, this former friend of mine got a refund and another friend was able to take my place.

I don't know why they wanted me so bad. They had a lot to say about how bad of a friend I was and not much good to say about me, and yet they wanted me so bad. I didn't feel appreciated as a person and they didn't celebrate me as a friend. Yet, if they told me they needed me I'd come in and do what I could to the best of my ability even after they told me they hated me or told me my desperate attempts to help after they begged for my help was "inappropriate". I still stayed because if I'm the one in the wrong, I can also make it into a right if I really tried.

I hate to say it, but I feel anger when I think about these friends of mine. What I hate even more is that I keep wanting to go back. I keep wanting to say "yes! You're right, I am a terrible and awful person and I will change myself just for you guys!" just to hear their laughter again, see their funny smiles, and . . . inevitably get sent large paragraphs of text telling me I did something wrong again. And then the cycle repeats where I think that I'm wrong and they're right because I'm the little sister who's immature and doesn't know anything and they're the older, wiser sisters who parent me.

I was really sure that I was the failure. I was the one that failed to hold it together. I mean, come on! I didn't communicate my feelings, I told a big lie to them, and I grew distant without explanation.

But then I had invited a friend of mine into my home who has hurt more times than anyone I've ever known. We didn't have to experience a terribly traumatic event together at a young age to be best friends, she just loved me. She loved me and she told me why.

She liked that I didn't yell or curse when she had moments of frustration and impatience, she appreciated my high level of patience, and she tells me that she thinks I have emotional intelligence.

My other friends never told me anything like that. They think I suck at supporting them, they don't think I can be trusted to make good decisions, that I'm an inconvenience and blah, blah, blah, blah.

At my house, my friend looked over the texts shared between me and these other friends. Maybe it's pushing their privacy, but I felt like it was detrimental for my mental health for eyes other than mine to view these text messages and tell me if I'm allowed to be upset or not.

This friend of mine looked at these text messages with complete and utter disgust. I watched her make faces viewing the messages. She visibly cringed upon reading them and it shocked me. I thought she was going to be able to find something I said, point at it, and tell me "here's what I think made her mad. I can help you write an apology if you want!"

But no, reading the exchange of text messages angered her so much that she couldn't bare to read the rest, which disappointed me. What if she's missing the part where I say something I need to apologize for?

What she told me was this :

• You need to stop letting them walk all over you, you need to write a long message to them but not out of empathy or kindness, but to give yourself closure. You need to do more for yourself. I just don't want you to sit here and let them bully you.

• They are simply just choosing to believe that you are a bad friend. You don't talk bad about them to me at all, and yet they claim that's all you've been doing.

• Why is it okay for them to discuss what they don't like about you behind your back and not you?

And stuff like that. We never ended up sending a long text for me to express my emotions because knowing these friends, they'd blow up on me even more and tell me how a lot of it is actually my fault.

It's been a hard 3 months. I'm worried about becoming exactly what these friends of mine chose to believe I was; an unempathetic, emotionally unintelligent, mentally-unstable, coldhearted, and immature creature.

This is because often times things are believed into existence. Therefore, I'm going to work on kindness without the expectation of something in return, generosity, mental clarity, and patience to prevent their beliefs from becoming reality. I'm not going to give anyone a reason to treat me like they did ever again.

This situation has impacted my mental health pretty negatively, and so I'll be posting updates on my mental health!

[4veslil]

Headcanons | Paul Lahote | You're Paul's SO and Neurodivergent

A/N: Hello! I thought this would be a great way to introduce myself to tumblr! I am currently writing a slow burn Paul Lahote Fic but to engage with the Twilight Fandom more I decided to do this! If you are interested in my VolturiOC/Paul Lahote Fic though here's the link! This is my first time doing Headcanons but please bare with me! Also if you have any requests I am willing to write for every Twilight character for preferences, imagines (<1.5k words), blurbs, drabbles etc. I will NOT write smut, not comfy with it and even if I did put an dni, children aren't stupid, we all faked our ages online once upon a time. All I ask is dni if you are underage! This blog 18+ only! Thank you for clicking on this and hopefully, I will hear some requests soon! Without further ado, ENJOY! ★ MASTER LIST HERE ★ P.S. Bullet points with a * is based off my own ND. Hope you don't mind!

This is new territory for Paul so he does what he does best- panics, gets irritated that he's panicking; get's angry when he can't calm down; goes for a run before finally, finding himself sitting at a library computer (in that order).

He sits at the library for hours researching before he's got a notebook of information on neurodivergence and enough questions for you to find it endearing.

He also takes out a few books written by people with ASD and ADHD and reads them front to back before skimming through them again to take notes.

When you get back home he's ready and puts you in the hot seat.

By the end he knows the normal stuff like favourite foods, animal and colours but also the textures you avoid, your quirks, your favourite fidget toys, what makes you overstimulated; everything that makes you tick.

You woke up the next morning to Paul ripping the tags off all your clothes, letting you know he's ordered new pillows for the living room to replace the velvet ones; he also got reusable cotton pads for the bathroom.

He keeps a hairband on his wrist for when your hair tickles your neck and causes your tick*

Paul also ordered some special ear plugs. He gets multiple- one for your backpack, one for his car's glove compartment and one pair to have on his person.

Paul also asked what your favourite fidget toys are and did the same as the earplugs.

Paul got you matching keyrings with the same fidget toy attached. His is black and yours is your favourite colour.

Paul knows a diary, schedule or to-do list doesn't work with you. He makes household tasks sound like a secret Pack mission, he makes chores fun.

Paul makes sure to put post-its about the house, sets your reminders on his own phone and reminds you gently. He knows you getting annoyed at the reminders isn't personal.

He double (more like triple) checks his notebook before he gets you something.

All his gifts have something to do with your special interest

Any clothes he gets you have tags removed and washed with your favourite detergent before he gift wraps them.

Paul is more than prepared for a break down, he doesn't try to touch you during those.

He knows not to feel rejected when you flinch away or say no to a hug. He just smiles and makes sure not to be too loud or make sudden movements around you.

Paul asked about masking and he could tell you were lying when you said you don't mask around him.

Paul takes you hiking to a secluded place in the forest and phases into a wolf if you've had a bad week. He lets you lay on him and read, just so you can unmask and relax. You find it easier to unmask when he isn't human.

You can go quiet and Paul learns to get comfortable in the silence, silence used to be the calm before the storm, now he sees it as the storm passing by at a distance.

Paul knows you hate touching carboard that's been in the fridge or freezer, after food shopping you find he's opened everything and repackaged it.*

Paul speaks straightforwardly, his communication is clear, especially when it's important or knows you're already overstimulated/overwhelmed.*

When you meet the Pack Paul hates how confused you look when some of the banter goes after your head- he tells you not to force yourself to laugh, says he finds it funny when you don't humour the boys.

The Pack started taking advantage of things going over your head, when Paul pointed it out you shrugged it off because it was only a bit of banter.

Paul pretended to leave it but roughed up the Pack (more than usual) when they were sparring, or would accidentally ram into them while running.

The Pack say he's whipped when they see memories of Paul letting you pet him in wolf form.

At Christmas Jared gets you a pink collar with studs for him, teasing you of course. While you're confused (and distracted) Paul yeets it at Jared's head.

When he gives a gift- of course it's something from your latest hyper fixation.

You get overwhelmed at the Pack's beach hang outs. You are not familiar with everyone's imprints and you get anxious.

You both sit a little away from the Pack and their imprints, silently laying together or drawing in the sand.

Paul always makes sure you're included in the conversation when someone approaches.

He holds you tight in his arms when you're feeling agitated because he knows you like to be squeezed, it grounds you.

Of course, when he found this out he ordered you a weighted blanket.

Paul wants to know everything, all your likes and dislikes- what's safe and what's not.

Paul smiles ear to ear when you tell him he's listed in the "safe" category, he notes it down with a smug expression.

But his face (half-)teasingly drops when you joke he's a close second to your all-time, favourite movie character.

He loves how your mind works, sometimes out of the blue you'll say something so off topic and he'll make you explain where you got that- he's fascinated by it and how easily one thing links to the other.

When the bad days happen he makes sure to just be there, knowing not to touch you- that you just want him by your side.

On those days he makes all your safe foods and separates them on the plate based on your specific eating criteria. He doesn't entirely understand but doesn't tease you for it either.*

He shares your safe food list with Emily because he knows you get embarrassed about eating in public- you used to get teased about how plain and boring it was.*

He goes back to the public library to look up the quiet shopping hours at your favourite stores and what restaurants have your safe foods.

Paul wants to understand everything about you and where it comes from, he fills up one notebook after the after and doesn't let you peek inside.

You try to reason they're all about you so you should get to read them, he still refuses.

The day you finally manage to get a hold of his notebook, you close it after reading the first page. On it is written: "Notebook #3 - everything I know about future Mrs Lahote"

[isbahstudio]

Hey! I’m starting my education in the paralegal field this fall, any tips or advice? Your blog is gorgeous! Hope you’re having a good day :)

Hi! Thank you! I do have a few tips I often like to give:

1) Be a self motivated learner! Alot of the law is researching and learning on the way. You will not know every statute or every filing software. You just google and learn along the way.

2) Legal writing is very different from normal writing, even different from academic writing. Legal writing is very cut, dry, and to the point. It usually follows the IRAC format. Issue, Ruling, Analysis, Conclusion. Basically, state the relevant laws and explain the case.

3) Keep a notebook solely for paralegal tasks! I have a leather diary designated for this. I write down all the little things I learn, like steps for filing motions, steps for serving discovery, jot down important deadlines, jot down legal jargon and commonly used statutes, jot down examples of legal citations to refer to, etc. This really comes in handy!

4) Understand your attorney! Eventually, when you do work with an attorney, identify the type of personality and the type of work environment you like. Some people have a bad experience as a paralegal because they're paired to an insufferable attorney. Some people have a great time, because their attorney is chill, collaborative, and a good mentor. Understand how your attorney likes to do things. How they like to organize tasks, organize files, maintain correspondence, etc. Basically, take their work style, improve on it, and make it more efficient.

5) Network! Alot of times lawyers and law firms are not posting jobs on the internet. It's more word of mouth. So try to network and do legal internships to get your foot in the door.

6) Portfolio! I have a digital and physical portfolio of my work with sample legal documents I drafted, sample case briefs, sample indictments, etc. In today's impossible job market, a portfolio can really help you stand out!

Finally, just have an open mind. When you are in your paralegal classes, it can take a second to get a hang of things. You may also find some patches to be dull and boring. But, the law is very diverse and there are many niches you can go into after graduation. If in the future you want to pivot away from being a paralegal, your experience in law firms or legal offices, can help you enter other fields like business, public policy, etc. A paralegal certificate is truly what you make of it. I kind of see it as a DIY degree!

Hope this helps! Good luck!