#my Dude doll collection is now COMPLETE

[lunatic-pudge]

CHAT! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! THE DAY HAS COME!!!

THE GANG'S ALL HERE!!!!

I can make them all kiss now. >:)

They even came in cuddling!!!!

[womendeservehumanity]

Ok I really am done with twitter now…. To Bluesky I go because the fact that this complete and utter garbage shows up on my tl because it’s the alt right misogynistic (along with racist, homophobic, etc.) bullshit that Elon wants to shove down my throat instead of my actual interests such as feminism, tennis, film, humor, etc which prior to about a year ago was what I would see because the algorithm was actually formulated for ME. Now it’s this. And what I especially find crazy is I’ve seen this account before. He’s a self proclaimed incel who hates women to unfathomable degrees. Thinks they’re all evil, narcissistic, shallow, promiscuous, etc. And yet men still gave him a semi viral tweet because there’s no line to be drawn

There is no line in the sand for what is unacceptable. Men have no problem endorsing the ideas of a clearly mentally ill and delusional individual who loudly and proudly hates women and perpetuates harmful and untrue rhetoric about them and their “nature”. Who, like many incels, genuinely think every single woman is somehow dating 1% of the male population when all it takes is actually going outside and seeing that average people are dating each other and not every woman has her very own Ken doll.

And he is another example of my last post where these plebs live in a reality where men are perpetual victims being beaten, kicked, and spit on by evil wahmen and men. Uhh erm men are totally not doing anything. They’re totally hating, bashing, and harassing women online. Dedicating entire spaces to it. They’re totally not literally raping, abusing, and killing women. Implying that would be painting them as anything other than innocent babies and would give more nuance to these evil women “hating them”

Also, and my last thing, this dude is Chilean. Still lives there and tweets about it from time to time (getting little to no likes bc his followers only care when he’s shitting on women). He sometimes shows his especial hatred for Latina women, mainly for being disloyal and promiscuous. He gets upset about their fetishization and them being pedestalized by white males along with Asian women as the ideal woman who’s submissive and traditional unlike those combative white women because to him all women should be hated by men and men need to “wake up”. He’s constantly trying to push back at those sentiments and Latina women being painted in a (not really) positive light. And use anecdotes to prove that they’re sooo evil. Something about being an mra who acts as though women have this collective hive mind dedicated to making men’s life miserable while living in Chile when your country along with all of Latam has a huge misogyny culture namely femicide. Chile especially has a huge domestic violence problem yet he still finds it in himself to villainize women, specifically women from his region and act as though they don’t suffer. Act as though men aren’t the reason. Or that it’s just these 1% chads when if you look at the news your average abuser is literally just some guy.

[cottoncandythetrashpanda]

The Wonderful World of Dollies and Crafting, Chpt 1

Words: ~1k

notes: this au is inspired by my friend @aslitheryprinx's old Ragdoll AU, as well as Toy Story, and my own eclectic doll collection. Also note that there will eventually be shipping (haven't decided which ships yet) and all hermits will be present with no particular "main character" across later chapters. Asks are always welcome if you're curious about the characters or world! Enjoy!

Cleo hummed to herself, putting the last few stitches on the little doll-sized suit jacket she'd been working on. Making the clothes was the final step in the weeks-long project, and she was glad to be near finished.

Not that she didn't enjoy her work, of course, but it had taken a while, longer than she'd expected- what started as a simple test of her skills with epoxy clay, to see how well she could add a bit of muscle mass and tone to a doll, turned into a full customization project complete with repainting and accessories, starting when she accidentally sanded the chest down a bit more than she intended and, rather than try and re-enhance the bust with the epoxy sculpt, decided she was changing directions and making it into a male doll now, too. It spiraled from there.

But here she was now, finally finished- she put the jacket on the doll, and grinned at her finished product. A well-muscled doll, wearing a nice suit- with missing, "torn" sleeves, like he'd flexed them off-, a red tie, painted with scars (to make him look tougher), and a halo affixed to his head with a wire (because why not). She picked him up.

"Hmmm." Most of her customs were quickly listed and sold on Etsy, but this one... She liked him too much. She didn't think he'd sell, anyways- he didn't scream "mass appeal" and she wasn't the most popular doll customizer- not that she really wanted to be. Her Etsy shop was titled "Hermit's Crafts" for a reason. "I think I'll hold on to you."

She looked around the room, her workshop/study/display room, for a place to put him. She spotted an empty place on a shelf, in between an action figure she'd bought at a dollar store and a Heath Burns from Monster High- both items bought with the intent to give them a 'glow-up' at some point, both projects never quite started. Maybe someday.

"I guess I need to settle on a name now, if I'm keeping you." She muttered to herself- well, to the doll. But it's not like he was going to talk back, it was the same as talking to herself. She had been thinking about names while working on him, and she had a shortlist- they ranged from silly to plain, and you know what? She was feeling a bit silly today. "Alright, I christen you... Skizzleman." She smiled and set him down on the shelf. "I'll take photos to post later, working on you tired me out."

She took another look at Skizzleman, admiring her own work just one more time, before stepping out of the room.

The door shut behind her and her footsteps faded down the hall.

"... Okay, looks like she's gone, I think we're good for now." a large action figure standing across the room said in a posh British accent that didn't quite match his armored appearance. He wasn't quite life-sized, but he was tall enough that he was stood on his own on the floor, and definitely wouldn't fit on any of the shelves.

Skizzleman looked around, turning his head for the first time in a while. He'd hardly had time to move at all while Cleo was working on him. All across the room, he could see more toys, more dolls, doing the same as him- looking around, stretching, starting to chat with their friends.

"Hey! Hey, dude, you okay?" He jumped a little and turned to see the action figure he was stood next to, looking at him with mild concern.

"Uh?" Skizz responded.

"Oh, sorry, didn't mean to scare you." The action figure adjusted his position- which Skizz could tell was no easy task, he didn't have much articulation- to face Skizz. "Just wanted to check on you, that was a pretty intense custom job she did on you."

"Oh, yeah, it was." Skizz shook his head. "It didn't hurt or anything, though. Felt a little weird when she wiped my face off, but she painted the new one on pretty quickly, so it wasn't that bad."

He heard a sigh of relief from behind him- he turned to see, of course, that Monster High doll. "Everyone always says that, but it's so nice to hear. The idea of being worked on like that still makes me so nervous."

The action figure laughed. "You worry too much about that, Tango. It's been years since we got here, she's never going to do anything with us."

"Tango?" Skizz said, a bit confused- he'd seen dolls like that across the aisles at the store, he hadn't gotten to talk to one, but he was pretty sure the name on the box was "Heath".

"Yep, that's me!" The Monster High doll, Tango apparently, replied, "The name I came with didn't really, fit, I think? So I just picked my own." He raised his arms in something like a shrug.

The action figure nodded. "Yeah, Cleo still calls him Heath, but we all know he's Tango. It's the same with me, Cleo never really gave me a name and my box didn't say anything either, so I go by Impulse now."

"No, the box said something, it just said, what was it? "Super Cool Hero Man"?" Tango was clearly barely keeping himself from laughing.

"Oh, shut up," Impulse waved him off, trying to keep his tone lighthearted, but clearly a bit embarrassed. "Anyways, yeah! Nice to meet you! Cleo called you, uh, Skizzleman? Think you'll stick with that?"

Skizz thought for a second, then nodded. "Yeah, I think I will. It suits me."

Impulse put his hand out and patted Skizz on the back. "Alright, well hello, Skizzleman! Welcome to the Hermit's Crafts family! Remember your spot on the shelf, because Cleo will. You can move around wherever, just make sure you're where you're supposed to be when she gets back. She seems really nice, but, you know-"

"Yeah, I know, you can't let humans see you move."

Impulse nodded. "Yeah. Just seems like a bad idea. So, be careful, I'm sure you can figure out the rest. How about I show you around and introduce you to everyone?"

Skizz smiled. "That sounds good."

Impulse smiled back.

Skizz got the feeling he was going to like it here.

[lemonynuggets]

Hey lemon dude, for some reason lemon reminds me of spaghetti. Im calling u spaghetti man by now, just cause yes.

So, spaghetti man, what r your favorite books? Have u read any good ones this year or in the last one? Do u got any recomds in ur back pocket to give to the poor < someone that needs something to read, im the poor

fascinating thought process anon…

this post got too long so I’m putting it under the cut augh

Ok um to be completely honest I spent the entire year re-reading PJO/HOO and started TOA and the only books I read that weren’t riordanverse related were the seven husbands of Evelyn Hugo, doll bones and the little book of angels (and if comics/manga count: I re-read most of JSHK besides following the new chapters/reading the spin-off and got the OSNF part 1 comic and I’m almost done reading it!!)

I grew up reading PJO/HOO and for many reasons this series is really special to me so it’s definitely among my favorites (Ironically my favorite book from each are the fourth books), I started re-reading it last year and made three of my friends start reading it solely because I was so normal about it… idk what kind of book you’re into but I’d recommend it!! Each series has 5 books and are really fun and easy to read <3

on the other books:

the seven husbands of Evelyn Hugo was surprisingly good?? I was skeptical bc it isn’t the kind of book I usually read (I got it on my birthday) but as the book progressed I got more and more invested, anything I could say about it would be spoilers though

Doll bones was fun!! It’s very short but the story was interesting and I liked the characters, I don’t have much to say about it besides I enjoyed it

I bought the little book of angels for research reasons, I’m not religious but I like studying religious elements, specially angels, and I’m writing a story about angels and referencing things like the christian angel hierarchy so I thought the book could help me with references for that!! There wasn’t much stuff I didn’t know already there and a lot of the information was opposing (I forgot the word), it has pretty pictures though :)

Other books I remember enjoying (my memory is. Bad) are this was our pact (a really cute comic!! The story is cool and the art is so pretty), Luna Clara & Apolo onze (a Brazilian book with an interesting premise and a fun writing style), the 39 clues (very fun series, I read it around the same time I read PJO for the first time and I remember loving it so much…) and they both die at the end (made me cry)

And for JSHK and the OSNF book… you probably noticed I’m insane about jshk just by looking at my profile and I’ve mentioned several times ordem paranormal is my special interest and osnf specifically is my favorite season so I could spend hours talking about both of these but I’ll try to make it quick:

Jibaku Shounen Hanako-Kun is BEAUTIFUL, the story is really cool all of the characters are super interesting, the art is just. Gorgeous. It makes me sooo normal augh… I’ve been reading jshk since? Around 2019? I have a hard time with numbers, but yeah I am incredibly normal about it, here’s my collection and tiny Hanako to prove it

I have all the volumes that are out in Brazil plus both spin-off volumes and volume 0 and volume 9 in english + the tiny Hanako is the only jshk thing I’ve ever found in a con because I don’t have the money to buy actual merch and surprisingly jshk is not that known in Brazil

And o segredo na floresta part 1!!! I sold my soul for that book. I went to the book store to get ashk volume 2 and when I was going to pay I saw the osnf book and I had to stop there for like 2 minutes, put the ashk volume back in the shelf and wait in the book store for my mom so I could make a deal with her and ask for it because it was EXPENSIVE…

I am on the process of feeling the consequences of the deal we made but I GOT THE BOOK and gods I was so excited that day that I couldn’t even read it, I just paced around and waited to read it on the weekend

since I’m also re-watching osnf right now I can say they made a lot of big changes on the story, but it’s still really good!! The art is great and the past/future/now pages are SO CRUEL AUGHH they did NOT have to do that to me…. -100000 psychological damage everytime I read a new page…. Cellbit, Yabu and Akila when I catch you…

WELL THIS IS A BIG POST, sorry anon I tend to talk a lot…

I hope you find something to read!!! Yayy reading is so cool I love reading

[echoes-lighthouse]

🍼- do any of your S/Is also regress?

❤️‍🩹

💫 (bonus points if it’s a hot take)

🌿- do any of you S/Is or would any of your S/Is have a caregiver/babysitting blog? Ohhh or do/would any of your F/Os? What about a regression blog, would they have one of those? Esp curious abt Tate bc I’m not familiar with that dude so to me everything you say is canon

- birds :3 anyways I hope you’re okay that I slightly altered the asks to be more relevant/fun for selfship blog stuffs

Yessssss thank you I really really wanted some agere questions from this ask game!!! I super appreciate it and OF COURSE I love that you altered the questions!

🍼- do any of your S/Is regress?

Yeah! My Critical Role self-insert regresses (and so does Jester)! My League of Villains self-insert..... maybe regresses? I feel like they do, but they don't have words for it. My self-insert with Toshinori is a regressor as well <3 I feel like there are a lot of selfships where I could see my self-insert regressing, or my f/o regressing, but those three are the only ones where it's like "canon" to the dynamic.

❤️‍🩹 — do you have any special comfort items?

I collect comfort items like there's no tomorrow. I tend to switch between stuffed animals every few months, but I have three main ones (a bunny, a possom, and a weighted baby doll). Also, my poncho coat is definitely a comfort item. That's the main ones for now!

🌿 — do any of your f/os or s/is have an agere/caregiver blog?

Hmmm! I don't think Tate or Tomura would have an agere blog: I don't think they would connect to the current agere community, nor do I think my self-insert would have one in those universes.

My Silvertongue BNHA s/i might have a caregiver blog (they're a flip but I think they'd be more interested in being a cg online), and I think they would talk about that with Toshinori.

My DC/Sandman s/i would probably have both, their internet presence is very much the same as mine.

Me and Toga would share a blog that might have regression content on it, but it would focus more on the aesthetic stuff than the actual agere stuff.

💫 — is there anything you wish more age regressors knew? anything you want to tell them?

Beneath the readmore 'cause this is getting long!

Oof, it's been a while since I was in the main community, but here's a hot take, as requested.

The difference between age regression and age play is not whether it's sexual. The difference is whether there's an element of control and humiliation. If you like feeling like your caregiver is completely in control and you like the idea of punishment (even non-physical), you might want to look into nonsexual age play instead of the age regression community. Also, if having fantasies about someone helping you to regress in public makes you feel humiliated and small at the same time, that's another sign you might be on the kink side of things, at least some of the time.

You can, of course, enjoy both: but I occasionally see posts about punishment and humiliation in the age regression community that really make me feel like it's been mis-tagged.

At the same time, only you can really know what the centre of your regression experience is, and I know some people genuinely feel safer if someone else is making the decisions, but it's not in the same way that they're submitting to a dominant. It's a complicated kinda situation, I won't deny it, but sometimes I see people in the agere community that I just feel are only in the agere community because they don't realize kink can be nonsexual.

[toepher]

I wrote this as a kind of self reflection piece and also for the month of June to bring awareness to men’s mental health. Of course it’s July 1st and I’m sharing it now but I be a procrastinator sometimes. It’s deeply personal and embarrassing. I hope all my dude/bros can read through it and derive some strength and insight. Love ya’ll!

Combat Sports…and cheers to everyone’s collective midlife crisis on social media…including my own!

I have always had a deep love for combat sports and I’ve always been a protagonist. It started with wrestling back in seventh grade. I survived my first year and won a single match. I got completely destroyed and dominated that year. When I moved to 8th grade we were given the option of either staying on the junior high school team where I’d have a much better chance of getting a spot in the lineup or moving up to the high school team to basically be a rag doll for the elite D11 monsters that were consistently in states earning podiums.

I chose the shark tank and most of the time since making that decision I’ve always chosen the shark tank over the comfortable route. I got completely massacred in that room over and over again. John Henry, Mike Ferrera, the Mcgoldrick brothers, the Farley brothers, Erik Hansen, and George Kauffers consistently beat the ever living shit out of me. It was brutal but I found strength in it and they took the time to really teach me the sport. I got lazy sophomore year and into partying, drinking, and drugging. I quit the team and that moment was the beginning of a dark path that intermittently dominated my life for many years.

It all came to a head after my father died. I never faced it. I didn’t know at the time but the conversations he always had with me about his experiences and AA were likely the little bit of glue I needed to keep me from complete self destruction. It was also him trying to pull me up and out of it all. I ignored the shit out of him. When he died I did what men do I picked myself up, ignored the pain, numbed the pain, and went on autopilot completely unconscious to the damage I was causing. In 2021 I made the decision to get sober and start to really challenge myself again. I hated who I was and I hated how I looked. I had sacrificed my morals, integrity, and health during that time period in a big way and I’ve been coming back from it ever since. I found my strength again in combat sports under Professor Matt Perez at American Killer Bees as well as a metric fuckton of support from my colleagues at work.

The goal was simple. I will not die like my father in a chair at 60 years old obese and riddled with co-morbidities. Though I’ve felt him with me and even saw him once during the last couple of months the importance of having dad in your life as long as humanly possible can never be understated and I wish he were here with me now in the physical plain more than ever. We must accept that with which we cannot change and have no control over. But as I write my own history I know full well I have control over what I chose to do and when I started down this path to fight again and eventually become the kindest most vicious monster I could ever be the central goal remains the same.

Live as long as I can for my children. It is statistically proven that children from two parent households and children raised by single fathers lead better lives. The prisons are literally filled with fatherless men and women as I write this. My children will never be without me and my stepson is my son. I give not a single fuck about the adoption I was unable to secure or the blood we do not share. I will never leave him or be anything less than a father to him regardless of circumstance.

When I walked back onto the mat at American KIller Bees in 2021 I was 257lbs of swollen alcoholic still gradually drying out. I had no concern then for the vanity that comes with exorcise and I’d caution anyone who starts down the road of physical accountability to put the vanity of reclaiming your healthy body to the very back of your mind. Focus on bigger things that matter more and just start showing the fuck up.

In the beginning you will be nothing but discouraged as you constantly measure yourself against others or free weights or the treadmill or whatever your schtick is. It doesn’t matter. What matters is showing up as much as humanly possible, doing whatever you can with the body you’ve got, and showing up again and again. More importantly than anything else is showing up when you don’t want to.

I’ve been showing up. I’ve been sharpening the sword. I’ve been working and developing my own game and I’ve been testing and measuring my skills against bigger, stronger, faster, and better men and during the beautiful pain of the process I have certainly become a monster again myself. However the monster I am now is one of total control. The foundation I’ve built through MMA and therapy has proven itself unbreakable thus far.

To many of you I’m sure I appear skinny and unassuming. I like it that way. It seems some people who think they know me routinely see my kindness and loving nature and mistaken it for weakness. The truth of it is my truth. I talk shit because I have bled, broken, and brutalized myself on those mats. I talk shit about life and psychology because I’ve survived tremendous darkness and educated myself through it with a good therapist. I talk shit because I’ve earned the right to speak it. I talk shit because I know I’m the total package nowadays and anyone in my circle will continue to be pulled and inspired by my daily quest to be a good man in the face of everything hell bent on making me into what I am not.

If anyone reading this wants to find out you’re more than welcome to come down and sign a waiver at the gym or openly debate anything with me. I have earned the right to tell the majority that you will find yourself sorely lacking if you haven’t been training your mind and body as I have. The two are more intricately connected than myself or anyone truly understands. I have become a psychological and physical savage in the nicest way possible and I’m proud of it but there is still much work left to do.

I found my why, it was in myself and my children. Get off your ass and go find yours. Stop sharing dumb quotes to an oceanic background and start putting the work in you fuckin savages!

“Aspire rather to be a hero than merely appear one”

[aversiteespabilas]

Ohh god, i can't just move on from that response im so back! I love info dumps, and boy do you deliver 😭🙏

Okay, the previous draft you had for the girls are fighting is so big brain, and honestly as a concept goes waaay too hard! But I see how it would look awkward in practice. You know, i really like that we can see Tetsu's face i think that was a good move, and it really does carry forward. I mean this is a moment that lowkey shaped the way Yusuke views Tetsuya and the Usagi at large (and arguably himself).

I kinda feel like your original idea still comes through though. I may be talking out of my ass, but hear me out: to Yusuke, Tetsuya exists as a living symbol of the Usagi. Having Tetsu literally stand above Yusuke places him in a weak submissive position, he's completely helpless and is being fully judged in what's probably one of his weakest moments. In Yusuke's mind, he IS being judged by the Usagi. We're literally watching Yusuke be turned away by THE symbol of the usagi. 

and by his brother…

It's almost biblical dude. And i think THATS why the outside framing hits. This is an incredibly intimate moment that feels…wrong to watch. The scene around us is practically Begging the audience to turn our gaze and spare Yusuke the embarrassment of being watched. but we still choose to push those bushes aside and take a peek…

i think you really nailed the vibe. and this is the OPENING CHAPTER??? this goes criminally hard, Rhin need to be LOCKED UP for this 😭

and…about the paws.

I feel youuuuuuu, the rabbits are so fluffy and soff i neeeeed to touchhhh. Im in the corner of a room rocking back and forth with my arms around my knees thinking about fluffy bunnies. 

I LOVELOVELOVE the rabbit shapesss, im gonna talk about it every time!!!! the paws, and their rabbit feet?? And their twitchy wittle wabbit noses 🥺🥺 their ears are probably sooo soft…just like…imagine how supple the skin under their ears are. I might explode.

two sexy furry-adjacent OCs getting dirty in the sheets? AWOOGA BARK BARK AWOOOOOO!!! and tetsu reaching for that cake?? honestly same, Toshi’s a baddie 😭🙏 but like…it's Genuinely a really pretty piece. i'm not educated enough on this stuff to really put what I'm thinking into words, but it really does look good, kudos!

IM LOVING H&H. I’m such a big fan of your stuff and i'm definitely on the H&H train 💗🙏 

anyways, as always thank you for sharing ur rabbits (and hares) i love the RRCU and i'm having so much fun watching you and Rhin play with the dolls!! There's so much to talk about, and i wish i had the brain power to do so 😭 but trust me, I'm seeing everything you guys put out and I'm having a ball!!

- 😎

WAAAAHH I love your take on that chapter and the illustration!! You're so right. At the time, Kyouhei (their dad) was still holding the Usagi-sama title, so in a sense they were both being held against the wall, but as future Family Head, Tetsuya had to make a decision to stand for the Usagi name. Regardless, Yusuke had always seen Tetsuya as a role model more than anybody else, and being rejected by their father didn't hurt nearly as much as being rejected by him. They're brothers, but they're twenty years apart and Yusuke spent much of his childhood at his house and under his care, so Tetsuya has practically been a father to Yusuke too, more so than Kyouhei was. You might have noticed we actually tend to refer to Tetsu as his brother-dad sometimes hgfgjh you'll be seeing more of that in the latest Sword Lifted chapters.

And also I agree with you! Chapter 1 goes criminally hard, it's so so poignant and still makes me absolutely insane, it actually hasn't changed significantly from how it was back in December 2023 when it was first written and most family lore was in progress/very vague. Fun fact, what is now Chapter 1 of a 45-chapter fic was actually a little one shot thing Rhin had meant as a gift for me, after a sudden collective episode of insanity and me drawing their Apoc Miyamoto (now Yusuke) with my own rabbits Yuki and Jojo.

Check out my genuine reaction:

There was plenty of screaming, plenty of "OHMYGOSH THEY'RE RELATEEEDDDD", plenty of gushing about each other's characters, plenty of lore-adjusting and giggles about there being two Jotaros, and before we knew it we had a whole plot staring at us in the face. At the time, Rhin had been meaning to write something about their version of Usagi in the Good timeline, where he was not Leo's partner but Kenichi and Mariko's. All of that converged into the RRCU as we know it today!

The reason we're each taking care of a different "timeline" is merely that Leo's established partner in each of our canon verses (Run O' The Mill Verse and Covetverse) was different, as well as other stuff going on with the Hamatos, so in Run O' The Mill Rabbit, Leo ends up as Yuki's partner, whereas in Covet (the Good one), Leo's partner is a human named Juan, and in Soft Apoc (Covet's Bad one) Resistance Leader Leo is dating an older, rugged Yusuke who goes by the name of Miyamoto. That means in the Covetverse, and by extension SL, Yuki's romantic partner is Cooper the dog instead. It's an adjustment that just needed to happen, BUT! Save for a couple of events, the canon lore of the Usagi family remains consistent and exactly the same. In fact, everything that's been written so far in H&H and everything we know about Yusuke's life before meeting Yuki at the bar, including the Girls Are Fighting scene, happens in exactly the same way. The timeline thing adds a big element of fun because Rhin and I can both build from the same lore but still surprise each other about how things happen and do it our own way, hehehe~

Man, now you got me infodumping about timelines and stuff- It's a bit confusing, I know! But there's really not that much of a difference when it comes to the rabbits, they're the same characters in just slightly different circumstances. H&H will only diverge from SL's canon in its very last chapter, and I'll add a little note about it when that happens. ANYWAY! That was all to say that SL's chapter 1 went criminally hard for a REASON! It was meant to be a standalone thing to narratively cement the connection between all our characters, and I hold it forever like the freaking treasure it is!

Moving on to paws/feet, I LOVE drawing them, and in fact I love it so much that I keep drawing my characters barefoot even when it would make a lot more sense for them to wear shoes dfjghjhh in fact Rhin often writes them wearing and taking off their shoes and in my art I always gracefully ignore the shoes, apologies for that! Other times I'll put sandals on them, or otherwise shoes that leave their toesies free, which is honestly hilarious but also HAVE YOU WATCHED ZOOTOPIA?? They know what I'm talking about. We deserve to see their cute giant feet and I'll stop now before I get pointed at-

Actually hold on, that "tetsu reaching for that cake" made me cackle jdfgjdjkg HE DOES LOVE SWEETS okay I stop now

Always and forever thank you for the interest you show and for these wonderful comments, it TRULY makes us bounce off the roofs every time! I often find myself posting stuff and wondering "what Sunny will think of this one", hehehe

Have a delightful day, friend!! <3

[rottenbrainstuff]

BG3 playthrough - Wasting time at the southern checkpoint

Spoilers below

Guess who backtracked about 5 hours of game time because they only just discovered that the newspaper actually changes every day based on what you did that day, and now they need to go back and collect them all? This is why I’ve been playing since October, have over 500 hours on my steam account, and still haven’t finished one single playthrough yet…

I’ve been playing since October. Wow. This game has just totally taken over my brain. On the one hand it’s been amazing to have my brain so thoroughly distracted, cause things have been getting really rough, and I appreciate the distraction, so so much. But on the other hand… I do sometimes wish I could be spending all this effort doing something actually useful. Last year I had been making some progress on personal projects, and I’ve had no desire to touch it at all since October. Sigh.

After finishing the backtracking and collecting all the papers, guess who found Carm’s Garms and wasted a few hours dressing everyone up like barbie dolls? I am NEVER going to finish this game!!! Look, it’s not my fault that Astarion looks so fabulous in so many things. I think my favorite dye for him is the white and scarlet, but sometimes the black and furnace red has good results. My tav used to wear a lot of red but has lost his taste for it - reminds him too much of what he wore as a bhaalspawn. He’s been using the azure and blue dye a lot.

So of course I finished the Open Hand Temple investigation. That was super interesting but also super sad, more tiefling refugees getting shit on, and the only person who really cared about them got murdered for his trouble. I like the little touch that Astarion disapproves of any religious comments that you make: on brand. I only just noticed getting a statue made gives the subject a permanent buff. Enjoy, Astarion. (and everyone else in the camp: enjoy Astarion) Found Petras and Dalyria at the flophouse. Trying to kill each other - that’s how you know they’re really siblings.

Obviously if I was at the clothes shop, I ran into Naaber. Oh boy. I didn’t get the joke at first and was quite bowled over by how strange and out of place he is, though I did find it funny and listened to everything he had to say. Then I looked him up online and found out he’s a running gag brought over from BG2 which is funny… But I ALSO came across a discussion where people were, as far as I am able to tell, asking in complete earnest if there was any way to deal with him besides killing him. ??? Look I know there’s no “wrong” way to play and whatever way makes you happy is the right way, but like damn. WTF are some of you doing? He’s an annoying dude to be sure, but it is a LITTLE bit funny, and if you don’t like him, you don’t have to even talk to him at all. (right? It almost sounded from what people were saying that he was following them around being a nuisance, but he definitely didn’t follow me. Did he used to follow players in previous patches or something?)

And then I went to Sharess’ Caress. Boy oh boy, the devs really liked this location didn’t they, they put in a ton of detail, lol. It’s kind of funny how everyone wants to meet at Sharess’ Caress. I thought it was just a funny brothel, but apparently it’s a respectable taphouse as well, judging from how many people just hang out here / conduct business meetings? Or is this like the people who claim they like to go to Hooters for the wings? Anyways I adore the cat, I adore mamzell Amira, I adore the put-upon chef. I adore how Amira introduces Raphael and makes the services he’s offering sound ambiguous. I wonder if she knows full well what he’s actually doing in that room, but this is how she introduces him, and some poor asshole who just wants a quick blowjob gets talked into selling his soul instead, or if she really does just think he’s some kind of freelance gentleman whore, temporarily renting out a room from her. I can’t decide which is more funny.

Drow twins: god the dude is hilarious and the girl is interesting. I must have spent at least one solid half hour just reloading and trying out all the different dialogue branches with them. What do other races get to talk to them about, I wonder? Being a drow I had some options to ask about their history and how they ended up here, and also point out that Sorn’s Menzoberranzan Love Trick is just a name to make customers excited. I assume at least that non-drow characters have other paths to get to their backstory? I wasn’t able to see the foursome because I was romancing Astarion, and he’s not comfortable with that, but I checked them out each on their own. Everything with Sorn made me laugh and laugh. If you say you aren’t sure what you’re into, he chats with you a bit, and dark urge has a few extra little options that are so funny. The only thing I didn’t get to see was what happens if you fail the athletics or persuasion checks. Nym was kind of an interesting encounter - first you have the humour option of just complaining and crying to her for a couple hours, or you can actually just talk, listen to her talk about herself or get some weight off your own chest. If you choose to talk about boundaries, she will talk about how the female drow stereotype is a spicy dominatrix, but she doesn’t feel comfortable doing the rough stuff. That suits my drow just fine - as his boundary, a male drow can say he’s uncomfortable with dominant drow women. It was very interesting. And apparently my tav keeps his gauntlets on during sex. Not sure if that was a bug or on purpose but it was funny, lol.

That was just me checking things out for my personal curiosity anyways - in my actual save game, I didn’t do anything with either of them. I know Astarion says he’s ok if you fool around, and whether he actually is or not is debatable (he seems more comfortable here than when you talk to him about Halsin, IMO), but my tav just really has no interest if Astarion isn’t there.

I walked in on the nymph and her client… I had no idea what happened there so that was a shocking surprise.

I was stuck for a while trying to decide what to do about Raphael offering the contract. I had said that I would do anything in my game to trigger his hilarious little monologue at the epilogue party. It sounds like you must sign the contract then break it in order to get that. But everyone in the party is so freaking mad about it, I don’t have dialogue options to indicate I’m doing it fully intending on going back on it later, I don’t really want to deal with the Emperor being pissed off just yet, but if I lie to him, what do I do with Voss? Lie to him too? Man I dunno. I think it’s simpler just to tell Raphael to fuck off. Plus it’s also pretty funny to go and steal the hammer from him later. He’s the one who made me aware of the hammer: if he hadn’t mentioned it at all, I wouldn’t have known about it, but now that I know that he has it, BECAUSE HE TOLD ME, I’m going to go steal it? I just think that’s hilarious. Idiot.

HOWEVER IN THE END: I decided to do the contract. I have a second playthrough that I started and put on hold with a tiefling paladin, and since she would NEVER sign a contract with Raphael, I think I’ll make my durge do it. But besides just meta game reasons, I also reasoned… he just recently found out he’s a bhaalspawn, and I think he’s feeling like his crummy soul is forfeit. No big deal signing over his soul to a devil when he’s already completely fucked. Who knows, maybe Raphael and Daddy Bhaal will have a fistfight over it later and that would be hilarious. That’s where my tav is coming from.

I also did Gortash’s big fucking coronation but I’ll write that up as its own thing I think. Goddamn I am enjoying this game so much.

[to-star-lake]

in the early days when you joined bonten as their new advisor, you spent a lot of time with koko; drawing up business plans, managing the books, overseeing construction on new clubs and buildings.

koko had the nicest office of all of the bonten leaders. it was on the top floor of a highrise in the middle of the shibuya business district. complete with high-end leather and mahogany furniture, and a gorgeous city view.

you'd spent time with each of the bonten executives when you joined and koko was probably your favorite to work with. you found takeomi too serious, kakucho boorish, mochi too macho, the haitani's were exhausting, and sanzu..well..

koko was like you; blunt and efficient with work, a little impatient, maybe a little condescending. you enjoyed your daily work with him in his office. it was always quiet, productive, and his assistants always served the best sencha.

except today.

today when you walked in through the mahogany double doors that led to his office, you were almost decked in the face by a toy rubber basketball.

"he shoots! he scores? no! he misses!" you heard a voice yell, followed by a maniacal cackling.

what...the hell is this? the floor of koko's office, which was normally clean, surgically clean, was littered with teddy bears, squeak toys, board games with their pieces strewn about haphazardly, a jump rope, a putting green, and a trash bin overflowing with crumpled candy wrappers.

the rubber basketball that almost hit your head rolled towards the floor-to-ceiling bookshelves on one end of the room and you saw a kiddie basketball hoop attached to one of the shelves. and below that, sanzu, flopped on his stomach on the floor, a different flavored ring pop on each of his fingers.

"koko..i'm really bad at basketball," he grumbled, picking himself up and walked over to koko's desk, slamming his hands down on the surface, the sudden gust of wind almost blowing the stack of papers in front of koko away.

"oh no, well, why don't you go try the putt putt?" koko sighed, not even looking up from his work, waving his hand in the air like he was shooing away a fly. "ah, y/n! finally, someone sane. please, get over here, i need you to look at something," koko waved you over when he noticed you standing in the doorway.

you made your way across the minefield of toys on the floor and greeted sanzu as he walked past you. "good morning," you smiled cordially.

he sauntered past you, looking down at you through bloodshot, half-shut eyes, his usual sinister smile plastered wide across his face. he'd opened his mouth to say, "good morning, little prin-" but then stepped on a pile of toy soldiers and tripped, tumbling to the floor, his long limbs getting all tangled up in themselves.

"uh... hey, koko?" you took a seat in the armchair beside the desk, setting your laptop down on the tabletop. "what's going on here? where's mikey?"

koko let out an exasperated sigh, rolling his eyes. "sometimes mikey goes off on his own, and when he does, the rest of us have to take turns...babysitting," he nodded at the gangly man with bubblegum colored hair with a plastic toy putter in his hands. "i pulled the short straw today," he sighed, pushing the large binder of documents he was looking at over to you.

"koko!!"

"jesus, what now?" koko looked up, so annoyed you could almost see the steam coming out his ears.

"there's no balls," sanzu pointed at the putting green on the floor.

"well, who decided to ambush people by pelting them with the balls outside the bathroom last time?"

sanzu stared back at koko blankly.

"ugh, nevermind. could you play with something else? y/n and i have work to do." koko scooted his seat closer to you, and began circling a few line items on the page in front of you. "got this today from the guys over at the club in akasaka. these totals look off to you?"

you glanced over the document, and flipped back a few pages and reviewed the itemized lists also included in the binder. "damn," you said, looking up at koko. "these assholes are skimming."

koko opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by a sudden loud popping noise. both of you turned to see sanzu on the floor, pulling the heads off of a pile of barbie and ken dolls.

koko raised his hands to his temples, the frown lines between his eyebrows deepening by the second. "jesus christ, this psychotic clown, if he wasn't the number 2 I swear to god-” he muttered under his breath.

"hey, sanzu?" you called out and sanzu's head jerked up to look at you, his eyes suddenly bright and attentive, like a child amongst the sea of toys on the floor.

"yes, princess?" he called back.

"could you go on a coffee run for us?"

sanzu tilted his head a little, confused. "a coffee...run?"

"yeah...you know, to buy coffee?"

he blinked, still confused.

"to buy...starbucks?"

"ah! you want me to buy you starbucks," he suddenly shot up.

"yes! yes, please, for me and koko, that would be great," you smiled, thinking you were finally getting somewhere with him.

he walked over to the desk. "anything for you, princess. and you can call me haru," he hummed, taking a bright pink ring pop off his finger and sliding it onto your ring finger, and a blue one onto koko's ring finger. "be back in a flash."

he turned to walk out of the office, whistling and not bothering to avoid the toys scattered on the floor, simply stepping on them as he went.

the doors closed behind him and you turned to koko, "now we can get some work done."

"let's hope he takes his time," koko rolled his eyes, sliding the ring pop off his finger, holding onto only the plastic part as gingerly as possible, a disgusted look on his face because he could tell sanzu had definitely licked the candy already.

"is it always like this when mikey's away?"

"sanzu? yeah, pretty much. but mikey tolerates him cus he's been with him longer than any of us, he's his loyal mad dog," koko sighed. "but that bastard's insane. apparently back in the day he got moved back and forth between all of mikey's captains cus nobody could handle him."

"wow. yeah, i guess i can see that," you glanced over at all the toys scattered on the floor. "seems pretty tough for you too."

"oh, i've actually done the best with him," koko scoffed. "last time, he was the haitani brothers' responsibility, they decided to take him to a hostess club. thought it'd be a good distraction for him. crazy maniac decided to pay for all the women there."

"all of them? that's..that's a lot-"

"no, that's not the crazy part. he paid for all the women, and then made them line up against the wall with liquor bottles on top of their heads and he used them for target practice." koko ran a hand through his hair, sighing. "anyway, who knows when he's gonna be back so we should try to get as much done as possible while he's away."

you nodded. the two of you worked dilligently, reviewing the rest of the books collected from bonten's other clubs and businesses in town, making one stack for ones that pass, and one that required additional scrutiny.

after a while, you stretched your arms up over your head, noticing the sun hung high in the sky and glanced at the clock on the wall. it read 12:15.

"i wonder where he is," you said, realizing it'd been almost two and a half hours since he left.

"who knows what that lunatic gets up to," koko sighed, turning the page of the binder he was leafing through.

"i actually could've used some coffee though," you yawned.

"i can have my girls make some sencha-"

just then the doors to his office burst open, and sanzu staggered in, eyes blood red, a blue gift bag in one hand, the other dragging a giant 10-foot teddy bear behind him.

"and suddenly my headache's back," koko muttered and sanzu approached the two of you at the desk.

sanzu dragged the huge teddy bear over and plopped it beside you. "i got this for you, princess."

"hah..um...where'd you get this..giant thing?" you didn't even know where to begin.

"there's a carnival downtown. i got it playing a shooting game," he grinned from ear to ear. koko groaned, knowing sanzu, by 'shooting game' he probably meant he threatened to shoot the person manning the booth if he didn't give him the bear.

"hah..i see, thank you. but why is it missing its eyes?" you asked, looking at the bear's face and noticing the eyeballs had been ripped out, only some tattered threads remained in the sockets.

"they were ugly," sanzu shrugged. "koko, i got you something too," he dropped the gift bag down in front of koko.

"thanks.." koko reached into the bag and pulled out a tiny cross-stitched sweater which could've only been made for an infant. "uh...dude, what is this?"

"it's a sweater for your chihuahua," sanzu explained, yawning and plopping down onto a chair by the desk.

"i don't have a chihuahua?"

"i could've sworn you did," sanzu tilted his head, as though in deep thought. "oh, i guess it's just you that's always yapping. it's amazing y/n puts up with this every day," he laughed, but his tone was filled with hostility.

you saw koko's body tense in your periphery and you quickly spoke up to diffuse the sudden tension. "haru, did you get coffee?"

"coffee? oh! the starbucks. yes, i did."

you stared back at him. "that's great, uh...so where is it?"

"on the corner of harajuku square, by yoyogi station," he smiled.

"what?"

"oh my god," koko groaned, raising his palms to his eyes and rubbing them in circles.

you looked back and forth between koko and sanzu.

koko took a deep breath and leaned back in his chair, turning to look at you. "he bought the starbucks."

[beelsnack]

I Put A Spell On You - Obey Me Boys and A Witch MC

I may have mentioned it in an ask or something before, but I'm actually a practicing witch. (Sorry, Mammon.) So, in honor of spooky season, I bring you witch MC!

----

Lucifer: "Can I ask you something?"

Lucifer looked up from the report he had been working on. In the House of Lamentation, hearing that question was very rarely followed by anything but disaster. He bit back the urge to sigh and turned to look at the human. "You may."

"Have you ever been summoned by a witch?" the human set down their pen. They had taken refuge in Lucifer's room in an attempt to actually get their homework done, and had been working diligently up until this point. "Like, successfully."

He raised an eyebrow. "No, I haven't. I doubt any mortal witch would have the power to actually summon me."

"That's what I thought," they leaned back in their chair, stretching.

"What brought this on?"

"A witch I know up in the Human Realm swore up and down that he had, quote unquote, ‘summoned Lucifer himself.’ No one believed him anyway, but I figured I would ask just to confirm my suspicions.”

“No, it is highly unlikely that a mortal witch would have the magical power to summon me,” Lucifer chuckled darkly. “Although many have tried.”

“What happens to them when they do?” they asked, completely abandoning their work at this point. Part of Lucifer wanted to reprimand them for getting distracted, but he couldn’t deny that he liked having their attention on him. “Do you curse them or something?”

“I do nothing,” he smirked as they got up to lean against his desk. Perhaps he could stand to take a break as well. “The minor demons they actually summon, however, often have their fun with those foolish enough to try.”

“Oh, I’ll bet the Little Ds have a blast with them, huh?” the human grinned.

“Ask Number Two about the time he possessed a ouija board and convinced a human they would die if they ever wore the color blue again.”

Laughing, the human moved to return to their spot at his coffee table where they had spread out all of their study materials. Lucifer, however, had different plans.

“Oof!”

In one quick, fluid motion, he had grasped the human around the waist and tugged them into his lap. The movement had mussed up their hair, and he affectionately moved a few strands out of their face to see their adorable pout.

“You know, my dear, you are the only human witch able to summon me. You should wear that fact like a badge of honor.”

Mammon: “Now that’s just playin’ dirty!”

The human had to make a concentrated effort not to laugh at Mammon. “Yeah, they really didn’t have to go that far. They already have you by the balls.”

“They do not!” Mammon growled, crossing his arms. “Nobody has control over The Great Mammon!”

“Except for the multitude of humans who you made pacts with because they promised you a few bucks.”

“Wow, okay.”

Shaking their head, they gently plucked the doll out of Mammon’s palm. It was a standard poppet, made out of cloth. “Why don’t you just have Lucifer or Satan undo the curses?”

“Because,” Mammon huffed. “Human magic is different from demon magic. None of us know the first thing about it.”

“You just don’t want to admit to anyone that the witches pulled one over on you again.”

“Can you fix it or not?”

Smothering another laugh, they brought the poppet closer to examine it. Aside from the basic filling, it felt like there were some stones in there, and they thought they smelled some herbs.

“So, basically all you need to do is remove whatever link they used to bind the doll to you,” they muttered, more to themself than anything. “Usually it’s hair, nail, a drop of blood if they’re feeling particularly nasty…”

“That’s what they were doin’?”

The human looked up, tilting their head. “What?”

“One of the witches was bein’ real nice to me,” Mammon sighed. “Patting me on the head when I dropped off some money for them. Shoulda known she was trying something fishy!”

“Okay, that answers that.” they made their way over to their desk, plopping down in the chair. “So she probably pulled out some of your hair and put it inside the doll. So all we have to do it get it out, this thing becomes a regular old doll, and voila, curse broken.”

“How do we do that?” Mammon asked, peering over their shoulder as they reached into their drawer. His blue eyes widened when they pulled out a pair of scissors. “Whaddaya plan on doin’ with those?”

“Mammon, this is going to hurt like a bitch.”

“Wha - ack!”

Mammon doubled over in pain at the same time the human cut open a slice on the doll’s belly. There, right in the center of the stuffing and stones - and there were herbs in there, they had been right! - was a little bundle of white hair, tied with a piece of twine.

“Ah-ha!” they plucked the bunch out of the doll, and Mammon just barely managed to catch himself on the corner of the desk before he went crashing to the floor.

“Holy shit, human, I’m gonna fuckin’ hurl.”

“Do it somewhere that isn’t my room, please.”

Leviathan: “Levi, I don’t know how to tell you this, but ‘witch’ and ‘magical girl’ aren’t the same thing.”

Ever since they let it slip that they practiced witchcraft, Levi had obsessively forced them to watch every magical girl anime he could think of. It was his way of relating to them, they were sure, but it was starting to get a little out of hand. There were only so many variations of the magical girl trope in existence.

Levi frowned at them. “It’s not?”

“Well, for one, I don’t own a super cute lolita dress.”

“Do you want me to make you one?”

The human laughed. “Somehow I don’t think showing up to a coven meeting wearing a pink loli dress will make the others take me very seriously.”

“What about blue?”

“Leviathan.”

“Fine, fine,” he huffed. “So if it’s not like in the anime, what is human magic like?”

“A lot more boring than demon magic, honestly.” the human shrugged, turning back to the monitor. Since they had put their foot down against watching Madoka, the two of them were rewatching Sailor Moon. “A lot of using herbs and crystals and energy. Really symbolic.”

“That is boring,” Levi scowled. “You don’t even get a transformation sequence.”

“I’m just as mad about it as you are, dude.”

Satan: “Holy shit, Satan, that is a ton of books.”

THe demon had no reason to look as proud as he did as he sat the stack of books on the table in front of him. “This isn’t even all of them. Some of them are cursed, so I let them be for now.”

“That’s...both impressive and concerning.” the human picked up a book off the top of the pile. “Whoa, it’s even handwritten!”

“I’ve collected my fair share of grimoires over the millennia.” Satan took a seat across from them, watching as they turned each page with reverence. “I believe that one is from a Scottish witch from the 16th century.”

“Should I be wearing gloves or something?” they cradled the book like it was made of glass. “This is historic, Satan.”

“I’ve cast the appropriate spells on them to prevent them from decaying, don’t worry.” Satan laughed. “Although your concern is appreciated.”

“I could learn so much about the craft from these,” their voice was barely above a whisper, eyes wide as they scanned each page like it contained the secret to eternal life. “This is...wow…”

The look of utter rapture that the human had on their face was endearing, and Satan couldn’t help but smile softly at them. “Feel free to peruse them whenever you like. They deserve to be appreciated.”

“You mean it?” they looked up with hope sparkling in their eyes. “Thank you so much, Satan!”

“Of course,” he reached over to tuck a strand of hair behind their ear. “That look on your face is worth any price.”

Asmodeus: “I have a gift for you!”

Asmo poked his head up from where he had buried it in his D.D.D. The human stood next to the couch, arms clasped behind their back and a giddy smile stretching across their face. Asmo could practically feel them vibrating from excitement.

“Ooh, for me? Darling, you shouldn’t have!” He pocketed his phone and gave them his full attention. “What is it?”

They held out their hands, revealing the treasure they had been hiding. “Ta-da!”

Asmo carefully picked up the chain from their palms. Dangling from the end of it was a small bottle, wrapped carefully in wire and turned into a pendant. Tiny, translucent pink stones sat inside, nestled in a layer of salt and herbs. The magic surrounding it was faint, as most human witchery was, but it was so uniquely them that Asmo could just about cry.

“Oh, darling, you made me a love charm!” he exclaimed, immediately slipping the necklace on. “It’s so cute! I love it, thank you so much!”

The human smiled. “I’m glad! I wasn’t sure what to do with the rose quartz, but I knew you would love them, so I figured I would make you something! Not that I really think a love charm would work on you, but I figured you would appreciate the aesthetic.”

Asmo laughed, reaching forward to cup the side of their face gently. “You don’t need to use a love charm on me, darling. I’m already captivated by you.” His other hand came up to touch the pendent resting against his collarbone. “This will just serve as a reminder of how spellbound you’ve made me.”

Beelzebub: When they had first described themself as a “kitchen witch,” Beel had thought that they meant they were a really good cook.

And while that was true, they also were literally a kitchen witch.

“Basil for protection...oregano to ward off negative magic...there, that should do it.”

To Beel, it just looked like they were making pasta. Which was never a bad thing. But they chose which herbs to season it with such intention and purpose, Beel knew it was more than that.

“Do herbs really have magic?” he asked, leaning on the counter next to the stove while the human worked on magic dinner. “I’ve never thought of them as particularly magical.”

“It’s more of a human thing,” they said, sprinkling the last of the oregano over the pot of sauce. “We don’t get the flashy sparks and all that, so we had to develop our own magic.”

“Hm…” Beel regarded the pot with curiosity. “Is that why your cooking is so good?”

“Sure, we’ll go with that.” they laughed, swatting at his hand as he slowly approached the pot. “You aren’t sneaky, Beel.”

“Can I just have a taste?”

“Your ‘taste’ is drinking the whole pot like it’s soup.” they rolled their eyes. “I haven’t even started cooking it yet! It’s cold!”

Beel pouted, looking every bit the kicked puppy. “But I want to taste your magic.”

“You can taste my magic when dinner’s ready.”

Belphegor: On nights when he couldn’t sleep, Belphie usually ended up with the human.

Sometimes it was just him wiggling his way into their bed and cuddling with them until he felt sleepy. But tonight, it looks like they were sharing a case of insomnia.

So that was how he ended up sitting on the human’s floor with his hand in their lap as they studied it like it was a textbook.

“So? What do the squiggly lines of destiny tell you about me?”

“That you’re a little bitch.” they shot back, running their thumb over the center of his palm. “You have a lot of crosses on your heart line.”

“Which means?”

“You’re emotionally fucked up.”

Belphie snorted. “I could have told you that one.”

“You’re the one who came in here and wanted to see some human magic, I don’t want to hear any complaining.” they let go of his hand. “The only reason I’m breaking out the salt and candles is to banish your demonic ass from my room.”

“You know that only works on lesser demons.”

“Anything will work as banishment if I throw it hard enough.”

Diavolo: This...felt kind of pointless, honestly.

They knew it was mainly because of Diavolo’s obsession with human culture. But doing a Tarot reading for the Crown Prince of Hell seemed like a waste of everyone’s time.

Well, regardless, a summons from Diavolo was not to be ignored, so they had dutifully gathered up their cards and made their way to the Demon Lord’s Castle.

“You know,” they began hesitantly. “If you want to know the future, you have a time-manipulating butler right there.”

Barbatos, ever watchfully, chuckled and inclined his head. “My Lord is fascinated by human methods of divination.”

“It’s true,” Diavolo nodded. “Tarot especially has always piqued my interest, but very rarely do I have time to indulge with the other witches who visit the Devildom.”

....Oh, they really couldn’t say no to the hopeful gleam in his eye. A man that large had no right to look that cute.

“Alright,” they handed him the deck of cards. It looked hilariously small in his hands. “Go ahead and shuffle them.”

“Oh, I get to do it?”

“If you want,” they shrugged. “I usually have whoever is being read for do the shuffling, so the deck can get a feel for their energy. Unless you don’t want to, of course.”

“No, this is exciting!” He really did look like he was having fun. “How many should I draw?”

“Just one, and we can go from there.”

With a focus that might have been a bit too intense, Diavolo began shuffling. He handled the deck carefully, which made them happy. So many people were rough with the cards, and they were always worried they were going to get ruined.

“Alright.” Diavolo laid a card face down on the table between them. “Would you like to do the honors?”

He was being dramatic, but they couldn’t help but play along. What was the harm in a little bit of fun? They flipped the card face up and let out a startled chuckle.

The Devil.

“Did you do that on purpose?” they asked, laughter dripping from their voice.

“No, honest!” Diavolo was laughing too. “What does the Devil card mean?”

“It means my deck has a sense of humor.”

[jiminrings]

I REQUEST A SOFT BADBOY DRABBLE WITH SHY READER AND HES TEASING HER BUT SOMEONE ELSE JOIMS IN AND THEYRE DOING IT TO BE MEAN BUT HES LIKE STFU BEFORE I PUMCH UR FACE ONLY IM ALLOWED TO BULLY SHY READER GRR 😡😡😡😡 and soft readers like 0.o but *squeals incoherently* 😭😭😭😭

last name, jeon.

drabble week: day two

drabble week masterlist

pairing: badboy!jungkook x shy!reader

wordcount: 3k

glimpse: "can't you tell that i really don't want you to be here?"

notes: a tiny change on the plot!! also: frat boy!jimin from day four makes an appearance :D

feedback + support mean the world to me!!

“do you wanna form-“

... yes

you DO have an alliance with jungkook

it's a very fair trade honestly

he pretends to be your boyfriend!! there's no specific boundaries to it, but he springs into action as soon as you're put into an inconvenience

in exchange, you whore him out to your friends!!! :D

no but literally that's how he called it

the whole reason this came to be in the first place is because you hATE confrontation with a burning passion

especially when it comes to those "i have a crush on you" moments that people spring on you all of a sudden

you don't like them back!!! that's the truth!!! but the problem is that you aLWAYS feel guilty letting people down

you obviously don't have the obligation to like someone back just because you sit next to them in class :// IT'S JUST IN YOUR NATURE TO FEEL THAT WAY

you wouldn't get into a relationship with said confessor to ease your guilt, clearly

do you plan on denying their advances? yes

but hOW????

you always take the passive-aggressive approach

you get jungkook to carry your bag and hold your hand, walk in front of said person and pretend not to see them, jungkook makes sURE to put some snide eye contact in there aaaaand the whole ordeal is finished :D

you've managed to let someone down slowly without having to speak to them in-person!!!

jungkook comes more handy than that too

you take him when you want to eat out because you're too anxious to eat alone

you take him when you want to go somewhere in which lining up is essential and you're also too anxious to stand by yourself

you take him when you want to go shopping when there's a sale but you're almost always intimidated by the barrage of people and salespeople so he asks and answers the questions for you

jungkook, in hindsight, is the perfect fake boyfriend for you <3

ALSO jungkook wants something from you

"whore me out to the girls from the families your family's friends with, and it's a deal :D"

that alliance and exchange is going pretty well so far

you mAY be on the more-reserved side but that doesn't mean you're self-aware!!!

you know that your parents are loaded and your shy nature could be somehow chalked to that since you didn't really have anyone that wasn't as non-superficial as you'd like, since they were the overprotective helicopter two-rotor seven-blade parents :(((

jungkook, however, is the only constant you have in your formula

you've known him since childhood and have been friends ever since

his mom's your mom's personal assistant, and one day when mrs. jeon couldn't find a babysitter for jungkook, your mom didn't hesitate to let four-year old jungkook come with her to work

jungkook's your fIRST actual friend that hates gold spoons with you because of how tacky they look :-) he's your emotional support person basically

your emotional support person who was sO close to running late from picking you up during his free day >:( you were about to break into a sprint if he arrived a second later, because you managed to spot a jock coming to you from the corner of your eye awhile ago

You Do Not Like Him <3

"and i even changed into a short-sleeved shirt to ward off your suitors. how romantic of me, don't you think?"

now that he mentions it, it's only now when you can drink him in in full-display

... wow

his right arm's the only one with his tattoos while his left's completely blank, but something about the balance just makes you !!!!!!!! even more

his arm's not completely covered but it was coming to be, something about the blank spaces of skin that are yet to be inked being a nice touch

"very romantic, kook."

now tHAT'S the answer he wanted to hear

he forcibly on your helmet for you to showcase, your grunts of annoyance being drowned out by whistling

(he's even looking left and right and making eye contact with anyone who has their eyes landing on you!!!!)

your cheeks smushed is a look he'll never be tired being in awe of, but he'll never tell you that, of course

"do you ever wonder if your parents would kill me if i misplace even a single hair on you?" jungkook thinks out loud and you don't even flinch with how sudden his thoughts could be, sitting on his seat first so it'd already be balanced when you do, "you sure you’re okay riding with me?? on a motorcycle????"

he usually uses yOUR family's vehicles (they let him and insisted he just takes one at this point) but when you called him, he was en route to kim kradle (it's a one-stop vehicle shop apparently) to get new rims for his motorcycle, bUT NOT ANYMORE HE GUESSES????

you come first compared to the booking he's waited on for three weeks

"i have insurance, i think."

no that's the wrong answer

why did you even bother.,,.,

jungkook flicks your nose because your forehead's protected by the helmet, his face contorted in half faux frustration

"you were supposed to be mad at me for asking that — not logical!! don't even joke about that."

"... my life insurance? like, in the instance that i-"

oW THAT HURT

he flicked even harder this time!!!

you roll your eyes at him and it doesn't go unnoticed, a hand outstretching instead of his fingers flexing

“wallet, please.”

????

jungkook's surprised that you even look confused, this time rolling his eyes at you

“you rolled your eyes at me. you need to bribe me so i won’t rat you out.”

right

he has a never-ending knack for the you're rich jokes

you also know that he likes the cold and would turn the fan on even if it's too hot for a blanket, just because he wants to feel cocooned

you also know that he picks from the fourth row of drinks from the front because it's always been a habit

("the germs cling on to the first row!!!")

you also know that maybe, just maybe, you can't stand it tonight when he's putting himself out there instead of being your faux boyfriend

you keep on zoning out and hoseok, perhaps the only tolerable fellow rich kid you can tolerate within your circle, finally connects the dots in his head and snickers

he's been talking about finding the vintage sneakers he's always wanted on depop and how he almost got scammed for like tWENTY minutes already

in reality, all your nods and scowls aren't towards his story

it's to jungkook and... who's that? jihye whose dad is so colossally shitty, that this one rapper wrote a diss song for him? oh yeah, that jihye

"you like him. like actually 'lose your virginity to him' love him."

WHAT???

there's no way

"how did you-"

"you blush like one."

alright that answer was too quick

hoseok should've ATLEAST tried to wait for a few seconds before answering

"a-and the love part?"

"babe, jungkook may not be the richest one here and that should say a lot," you peer up at him nervously and he actually chuckles, peering to everyone at this function, "dude's humble — he could also just be dense to not see you love him."

okay very true

hobi's making a dig rn at how jungkook coinicidentaally happens to be blonde and maybe this is your cue to leave

hobi does not realize that his hair is aLSO dyed blonde while talking shit about jungkook and his hari

okay this is it

once again, you are NOT listening to hoseok and he's figured out what you're doing by now

you're psyching yourself up with a couple of shots and your heels are digging on the carpeted ballroom

MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY TO BE MORE OUTGOING!!

"pretend to wobble. it doesn't help that nothing can sink you."

oh okay makes sense

if you're gonna try and charm jungkook while trying to play it off as just being tipsy playfulness, atleast make it believable

hoseok snickers because this is just A+ content with the things that you choose to do in your way

shy girl with high alcohol tolerance mannn coming of age film writers would LOVE you ://

you're about to cross the distance between you and jungkook, but something knocks you on your shoulder with a gentle force that seemed intentional

is that-

hold on a second

"what a coincidence :O"

jimin?

jimin???

as in, wholesome yet slightly fuckboy-ish frat guy jimin???

he looks dashing and composed, meeting your eyes perfectly and he doesn't let your confusion startle him

"i know that look. what am i doing here?"

he says it eloquently as if he's practiced it

AND HE DID!!!

you must've looked so shocked that you immediately apologized, shaking your head no

"i-i didn’t mean-..."

you're confused, sure, but that doesn't mean you're immediately judging

it's just that you never saw jimin here or any function of the like, but you wouldn't put it past him if he does go to these things!!! he looks like a million dollars anyways

"relax, doll. you’re so far the only other person i know that i've seen in these type of things."

he looks calm and collected, but maybe that's just because he spent the last five minutes waiting for you to stand so he could bump into you

this place is just sO suffocating and a familiar face is gonna be his relief from something so fancy that it became mundane

"have we been in the same event before this?"

"not that i recall, no. i get invited but this is only the first time after awhile that i went."

jimin drinks from his champagne flute, wiggling his eyebrows playfully, "wanna know why i'm here?"

you're curious!!! what can you say!!!!

you never really interacted with jimin at all before this, but a familiar face like his is comforting

because hoseok's already engaged in another conversation and jungkook's,,,, being jungkook and is fawning all over jihye

jimin chuckles at your insistent nodding, leaning closer to whisper to your ear

"my stepdad’s loaded as fuck."

oh so that's why

he tugs you down to sit at the nearest possible empty chairs, all its occupants gone anyways because they're in the dancefloor busting tRULY horrendous moves

maybe it's because jimin feels lonely too like you are, and it's him feeling comfortable because he's pulled you like ten seconds ago and not once asked him anything out of bounds

maybe that's why he fell into conversation with you easily because you're always intently listening

"might love me as a real son too. maybe that’s a bonus? you don’t really expect that shit in the things you see."

this situation is actually pretty cute

you snort because maybe you’re nOT that shy when you drink,, that’s the only thing that changes in you probably

this whole conversation that sprung from boredom was unknowingly the subject of many stares, including jungkook who you were initially supposed to go to

“you’re worthy of love, jimin.”

:O

jimin sPITS his drink because where the fuck did THAT come from???

why did you say that and why does he feel that he needed to hear that

“i-i think — i think you need more,” he raises his own glass to your lips hurriedly, caught in surprise but you still gulp nonetheless

“you’re-“ you keep sputtering as he keeps making you drink, but he rubs circles on your back at the same time and it's when you realize that jimin the frat guy may not be that bad, “what??? don’t think you’re not the only one with daddy issues! shouldn’t we have like, a radar for each other?”

jimin snorts at your counter and his eyes crinkle to the point where he can't see anything, not being able to see how you're still trying to recover with all that fizz down your throat

wow ur really enjoyable to talk to

“you’re insane and i think-“

listen

you're not really big on feeling beyond a sense and all that stuff, but you feel as if the aura around you just got dark all of a sudden

"who are you calling insane?"

jungkook appears at your side in an instant, hands wrapped around your shoulders while you remain seated

you've honestly forgotten that you were supposed to go to jungkook, but you're reminded of that vERY clearly now

"go away, jimin," he mutters through his teeth, looking at him dead in the eye

hold on

wait

THAT'S JIMIN???

okay now he's confused

sometimes jungkook's mouth just moves on its own without loading the thought process

"why are YOU here?"

jimin furrows his brows, shocked that he'd even see jungkook here out of all people

the guy barely even attends classes!!! and that's coming from him!!

"why’s he here?"

he crouches to your ear, eyes still furrowed at the younger guy

"long story."

nO???

jungkook scowls bitterly because jesus fuck

YOU’RE ON WHISPERING TERMS NOW????

he left for one second, and the moment he comes back, that's when this fucking frat guy approaches you?? was he waiting on him to leave??

you and jungkook only act as a couple when the need arises, and even if you don't feel it, hE feels that this is the need!!! this is the need and it is arising!!!

"get back to uh, alpha bravo charlie or something, park. beat it."

why’s he reciting the nato phonetic alphabet???

jungkook sounds half-angry and half-sad at the same time, and you don't know which side should you focus on

“move,” he repeats this time again but more sternly, making jimin much more confused since jungkook's trying to pull him away from his seat

jimin doesn't budge and it makes the frown even more evident in jungkook's face

what is he FEELING

“can’t you tell that i really don’t want you to be here?”

“i’m not here for you, though. i’m here for y/n.”

he answers honestly, shis gut telling him that there's definitely something going on between the two of you

“y/n doesn’t want you here," kook argues back surely, only noticing your bitten lips now that makes him realize that you're not exactly sober; just a happy kind of rush

he sees you raise your hand timidly, an equally cheeky smile on your face that's only directed to jungkook like it's meant for him

"i-i actually don’t mind."

you don't,,,

you don't mind?

HOW'S THAT POSSIBLE

WHAT ARE YOU DOING

why aren't you signaling him to commence the faux boyfriend act!!

"y/n has a boyfriend."

“... i’m not hitting on her.”

alright this is more than the entertainment that jimin wished for lol

“yeah, well she has a boyfriend still so beat it.”

you do??

the last time you checked, jihye's gonna have jungkook as her boyfriend within the night!!

“i don-“

ALRIGHT THEN

jimin decides to indulge jungkook, knocking his knee with yours as he winks slyly, urging you silently to watch on, turning to look at you and ask

“what’s your boyfriend’s name?”

you don't answer.

that gives him all the more reason to do so.

“last name, jeon.”

jungkook looks the most determined you've ever seen him, eyes characteristically angry with his arms across his chest that his suit tightens, “first name, me.”

....

......

the three of you know that’s not the truth

jimin takes it in, sighing when he sense that something else is about to be unfold and he does noT want to be a part of it

not before whispering to your ear again for the last time, of course

“pretty weird name if you ask me,” you laugh automatically, momentarily forgetting that jungkook's standing by you on just your opposite side and could hear you

he leaves and that only leaves you with jungkook, looking up at him as he's too frantic to even sit

“what are you doing?”

“being a social butterfly," you quip just as fast, drinking your water afterwards

jungkook only clenches his jaw by then, being taken-aback when you speak again

“who are you doing?”

://

“i’m busy being mad at- wait a minute, WHO???”

who instead of what??

the short-lived enthusiasm you had with jimin left with him, crashing just as hard when you're reminded of jungkook's presence

“jihye’s a pretty nice girl. you should go home early tonight.”

his brows furrow, trying to get you to look at him but you avoid his gaze insistently, “what? what are you talking about?”

“she’s not my girlfriend though.”

you're not at all satisfied with the answer because it sounds so wrong, knowing that jungkook's a handsome guy and everyone wants to be with him!!!

and he probably wants to be with everyone else besides you.

“then who-...”

“don’t know yourself anymore? jimin must’ve really swept you off your feet, huh?”

jungkook huffs as he qualifies for a rebutt, your internal wallowing being cut short

“he’s not my boyfriend.”

...

....

“well would you look at that,” jungkook snickers, sighing through his nose as your eyes finally meet his, directly stubborn yet soft around the edges

“she’s not my girlfriend, and he’s not your boyfriend. what a coincidence.”

god did he feel so threatened the moment his eyes couldn't find you besides hobi and instead next to jimin, eyes crinkled in laughter without hesitation

have you been chasing after one another this whole time?

jungkook silently grabs you by the hand and you wave no opposition to it

maybe it's your liquor-influenced vision or maybe it's you hyperfixating on such a warm moment, but your eyes immediately lock to see the matching red thread bracelet he wore like yours

you're dressed in next year's spring collection line, and the structured silk black gown that has a train behind it doesn't exactly scream to have a simple red thread bracelet as its accessory according to your mom's designer and everyone else —

but you don't have the heart to take it off

there's no need to take it off

jungkook drives your car and no one says a single thing about anything

his hand’s on your thigh and you don’t question it, eyes locking into the way his hand looks perfect and the way the bracelet looks meant to be wrapped in his wrist in the first place

you're sure this time that it's not the newfound courage you have, but rather the need to do it

you kiss jungkook's cheek on a red light.

it's on a red light that jungkook realizes he could fit the visage of his world within one hand, finally kissing you like he's always wanted to

“yeah. what a coincidence.”

[harryspet]

off to the races (2) s.rogers

[Warnings] dark!steve rogers x reader, stripper!reader, ddlg, daddy!steve, abduction/kidnapping, mafia boss steve, bondage, a hint of peter x reader, toxic/abusive relationship, hella angst, little editing 

A/N: im mentally shutting down because of school but at least i have mob!steve :)

In which you don’t want to be Daddy’s secret anymore.

word count: 3.5k

main masterlist

taglist: @cherienymphe @peterztinglez @lovelynerdytraveler @buckysbunny @hollandsdream @micki-smiles @buckybarnesplumwhore @arts-ismything @saharzek @lovemassivelybeautifulbouquet @what-is-your-wish @brattypeony @hermayone @buckysugar @mischiefmanaged011 @visintaes​  @disaster-rose​​ @sexyxseabassx​ @marvelmaree​

“Woah, dude, your room is awesome. Awe, you have all the good movies. I haven’t seen The Jungle Book in forever!” 

“Peter, look!” You waved him over to the window, ignoring his astonishment for the paradise Steve had created for you. Peter stood there dumbly for a moment before walking over to the window beside your bed. 

You heard the loud whirring of helicopter spinning blades echoing through the room even with the window closed. It was landing in the field behind the manor and you were questioning why Steve was making such a grand entrance today. You’d been stuck in this house for three weeks now and nothing this exciting had happened yet, “Who’s helicopter is that?” You looked back at Peter who’d crossed his arm nervously. 

“Uhm … probably … maybe-” You scoffed, before looking back at the view. The helicopter was a sleek, black color and, as you narrowed, your eyes could make out some words written in gold. 

“Stuh …. Stark …. Industries. Stark Industries,” You were calm as you took in the info before the realization hit you, “Stark Industries! Is Tony Stark here? Holy …. pancakes.”

Peter smiled, seemingly amused by your excitement, “Pancakes?”

“Steve doesn’t like it when I-” You stopped yourself from explaining, realizing there was a bigger situation at hand, “We have to go check things out. Get a closer look!”

“No way,” Peter shook his head, “I’m here to make sure you stay in this room.”

You rolled your eyes, “So Tony Stark must be here then, right?”

“I can neither confirm nor deny that,” Peter pressed his lips together like he was struggling to hold in all the secrets he knew. 

“How the hell does Steve know Tony Stark? Stark is dirty too? I should’ve known … flipping rich people.”

“Flipping?”

You took a step toward him and despite the fact you were wearing a pair of fairy wings, he still seemed intimidated by you, “What do you want, huh? A raise?”

“Uhm … I don’t think you can do that … can you?”

“Of course I can. Steve is wrapped around my finger.”

Peter cocked an eyebrow, “But he’s Steve Rogers …”

“Look around this room for goodness sake! He does anything I want. If I tell him all about how you’re a great worker, how you’re a good friend to me, he’ll surely be appreciative. Might even give you a promotion and maybe you won't have to play babysitter anymore.”

He considers it just for a moment, “If he does anything you want then why are you locked in this house?”

“Fine, fine, so I don’t have complete control but I have some. I could be helpful to you in the future!” 

“Y/N, if something went wrong he’d probably chop me up into little pieces and send them to my Aunt. Or he’d chop up my aunt and make me watch … depends on the kinda mood he’s in.”

You stared back at him, trying not to let the look on your face falter, “ … I’ll give you my movie collection?” 

“I’m sorry but-”

“It’s my birthday soon?”

“I can’t,” Peter stated, sighing, “I’ve got pressure on me right now, and things have to go right tonight. It’s like a huge deal. I never get to go to stuff and the party is-” He stopped his rambling when he realized he’d said too much. 

“Party?” Peter opened his mouth and closed it again. He turned away from you, eyes wide, and made his way to the door. Of course, you chased after him, placing yourself between him and the door, “What party?”

“Please move,” Peter begged, “I really can’t talk about it.”

“I won’t say anything, I promise!” You were the one begging now, “He doesn’t tell me anything at all. Can you imagine how I’m feeling? I’ll do everything you say, I won’t try anything, I just want to know what's going on …. please?”

“Steve can’t know,” You nodded eagerly and he finally gave in, probably because of your spectacular puppy dog eyes, “Tony Stark is having a party tonight, that’s where Steve’s going, and most of us are going to. A pretty important deal is happening.”

“Why doesn’t Steve want me to go?” You frowned a bit.

“I don’t think he wants anybody to know about you, to keep you safe, that kind of thing.”

“Right,” You nodded, “Even if I go crazy while he does that.”

Peter looked sympathetic, “I’m sorry.”

“I know this thing with me and Steve is not ordinary but is it crazy of me to not want to be a secret? Even after everything …”

You could tell Peter wasn’t expecting a deep question nor did he expect you’d confide in him, “I don’t think so,” Peter was trying to understand, you could see it in his eyes. He rubbed the back of his neck as if he wasn’t sure, “Obviously … you - uhm - care about him. I wouldn’t want to be the secret of someone I care about.”

He was taken aback when you suddenly hugged him. Unsure if he could hug you back, he awkwardly patted your shoulder which made you giggle, “Can I paint your nails?”

“What? No.”

“I have colors that aren’t girly.” “Hmm … can you do cool stuff like the shapes and sparkles?”

“Of course,” You smiled, “Step into my salon.”

+

“I didn’t get my sticker this week,” You bounced back from your toes to your heels, watching Steve as he got ready in his closet. He was fixing his tie in the mirror, making sure it was absolutely perfect, along with the rest of the look. Freshly trimmed beard and an aftershave that smells intoxicating. He smelt like money and looked like it too. That’s probably exactly how you would want to look in front of Tony Stark. 

“You skipped dinner two days in a row, doll.”

You were frowning but it wasn’t like he was focused on you anyways, “But I did better after that,” You whined.

“I know, baby, you can try again next week.”

“Maybe if you were here then I wouldn’t have missed it,” You whispered, playing with your fingernails, “But I’m stuck here and you get to go out and have your fun.”

“Have my fun?” He questioned, buttoning up his jacket. 

“You get home so late … I’m sure you go to your clubs, booze it up and talk to girls.”

He chuckled a bit, “You think I’m flirting with other women?”

“I don’t think, I know,” You leaned against the doorway, “You’re a guy, aren’t you? That’s what you do.”

He finally turned to you, and you felt your breath hitch in your throat. He was as handsome as ever, like a movie star, “Doll, my days are long because I’m traveling from here to the city every day. I want to fall asleep and wake up with you. There isn’t and never will be anyone who I’d rather do that with.” 

As he came closer, you knew he was going to lift you into his arms. Ever since he took you from the club and you sobbed into his shoulders, you’d find solace in his arms. Even if his hands were causing your hurting, they still felt warm and loving, “You don’t mean that,” You whispered, muffled against his shoulder. 

“What can I do to prove it to you?”

“Take me with you,” You said and you felt him stiffen. 

“It’s not safe,” He tried to explain. 

“Are you embarrassed by me?” 

“No, no,” He rushed out, carrying you out of the closet and into the bedroom. “Why would you even ask that?”

“Because of what I do, what I used to do-”

“No, Y/N. I’ve never felt that way,” His tone was more concerned that it ever had been before, “Look at me, please?”

Begrudgingly, you lifted your head. You hated that you were feeling jealous or inadequate, “You took care of yourself all these years and I know you still can,” He continued, “Let me protect you now.”

“I’m not a baby.”

Steve could sense the small bit of pride still left in you and decided not to push you on it anymore, “Could’ve fooled me,” Steve smiled slightly, bouncing you in his arms, “Let me tuck you in, grumpy.”

“The sun just set!” 

“It wasn’t actually a request,” He was already carrying you away. 

“Wait, wait, wait,” You resisted, “Can I sleep in here? I’ll go to sleep right away, I promise.”Steve stopped, thinking it over for a moment, “I like that the … sheets smell like you, Daddy,” You added, knowing that was what he wanted to hear. It wasn’t fully a lie but you had other motives for not wanting to go back to your room. For one, your room locked from the outside and his didn’t. Besides that, you were almost sure that one of your stuffed bears had a camera inside its eye. 

Steve tucked you into his california king-sized bed that night and watched you fall asleep until it was time for him to go. You felt the kiss he pressed to your forehead and, for a brief moment, you thought about changing your plans. 

That feeling didn’t last long. 

+

For such an expensive car, you thought your ride would be a lot smoother and much more comfortable. Turns out, hiding in any trunk, no matter how luxurious, behind big boxes of unknown items, was not a pleasant experience. An hour into the drive, you finally decided that you’d had enough and you needed to get the feeling back into your limbs. Besides that, you needed to check and make sure that your hair and makeup stayed in place. 

When you climbed over the seat from the trunk to the backseat, the car instantly swerved before the driver corrected its path, “Y/N, holy shit!” Peter shouted, obviously frightened out of his mind but you were focused on making sure all the layers of your dress made it safely back into their places, “What the fuck? What the actual fuck?”

“Oh, calm down,” You said, looking at him through the rearview, “Just keep driving.”

“Are you out of your mind? If Steve sees you he’s going flip his shit!” 

“Peter, you okay in there, kid?” You heard Bucky’s staticky voice over Peter’s radio. The younger man picked it up and answered, his eyes still focused on you. 

You placed a finger over your lips and Peter gave you a death stare, “Yeah, I’m fine … I thought I saw a squirrel.”

A caravan of three cars surrounded Steve’s car as they all drove down this dark, winding road that you assumed would lead to Tony Stark’s mansion, “Did you not comprehend a single word I said?” Peter shouted, “Do you want me to get killed?”

“This is my problem,” You said, “Steve will know that you had nothing to do with it, I promise. But tonight is going to go super well so it won’t even matter. Steve is going to see me and realize he’s crazy not to show me off and then we’re going to go to the party and I’m going to charm everyone with my personality which is going to make him a ton of friends and even more money. Everyone wins.”

Peter was shaking his head the entire time as he listened to your rambling,  “Y/N, I understand that you want to be more to Steve and you don’t want to be in the dark but this isn’t the way! This isn’t some charity event or some art gala, these are dangerous people.”

“But Tony Stark-”

“Is as dirty as it gets,” Your heart began to race a bit, “And Steve cannot just let everyone know his biggest weakness, even if they are his allies.”

His biggest weakness. 

Suddenly, your mind was racing with thoughts of moments with Steve. Meeting him, going on your first dates, the hotel meetings, and the passionate kisses that always left you feeling like he felt more about you than he admitted. You never saw yourself as his weakness. 

I want to fall asleep and wake up next to you. 

When you snapped out of your trance, Peter had his walkie-talkie pressed to his chin, “Guys, uhm, we have a stowaway,” You slumped back in your seat, and when the car eventually came to a stop, you wished you were still tucked away in Steve’s bed. You think Peter was calling your name, probably apologizing and telling you how he had to follow orders but, honestly, you had tuned him out, “I-I don’t know …. I thought I checked everything …”

Your dress was adorable too, covered in pastels, while still remaining elegant. You imagined Steve's heart with flutter at the sight of you, instead, he was fuming. He was always so stoic, so full of composure, that the change frightened you. He grabbed you roughly by your upper arm, pulling you from the backseat, and slamming the door shut. Pressed against the car, you looked into those blue-green eyes that were anything except nice. 

“I didn’t mean to for all this,” Was all you could muster up the courage to say, “I just wanted to come with you-”

He shushed you before you got your words out, “We’ll talk about it later.”

You wished he would just yell at you now. He could bend you over right now and you’d prefer that over his silence and the obvious disappointment in his tone, “Later? But-” He pulled you away from the car and you stumbled in your heels as he pulled you along the dark road. 

He brought you towards the last car in the caravan and Sam stepped out from behind it, closing the trunk, before handing something shiny to Steve, “What are you doing?” You asked shakily, the cold wind of the night blowing your dress. 

“Turn around, face the car,” He ordered you and you feared whatever punishment you were about to receive would be worse if you disobeyed him. Slowly, you turned around and he wasted no time grabbing your wrist. You heard the metal click of handcuffs as they tightened around your wrist. You felt his strong hands on your waist and, as he lifted your dress, you assumed the worst. Your panties slipped down and as Steve lowered himself with them. 

“Steve, please talk to me?”

To your surprise, as you stepped out of your underwear, you felt the click of metal around your ankles. When he stood back up, he grabbed your arm again, pulling you back so you were pressed against his chest, “Daddy will deal with you later,” His breath against your ear sent shivers down your spine, “Don’t worry, doll … open your mouth.”

“If you just let me explain-”

You weren’t sure why you even wanted to. He left your brain scrambled and wondering why you even did the things that you did. 

“I won’t ask you again.”

Your lips parted and you realized he was forcing your panties into your mouth. The next thing that you knew, you were lying in the back seat of that car, your wrist hogtied to your ankles. And you thought sitting in the trunk would be uncomfortable. You were struggling and calling out for him and, as you expected, you were ignored. 

“Get her back as fast as you can. I’ll keep things short with Stark,” Were the last words you heard before the door shut close and all your screaming was muffled. 

+

You weren’t sure at which point you’d fallen asleep. As you laid there tied up, you thought a lot about him since there was nothing else to think about. You weren’t sure how he could love you and be so cruel at the same time.  

That next morning, you awoke to sore limbs and makeup staining your pillow. Even though the car ride back was hell, you knew your punishment wasn’t over. You debated even getting out of bed, knowing what was to come. 

You finally mustered the energy to clean yourself up, washing your face, and brushing your teeth. When you stepped back into your room, you were taken aback by what was sitting in the middle of your room. A giant, life-size brown bear was happily perched before your bed, holding balloons and a Tiffany’s gift bag. 

It was exactly the opposite of what you were expecting today. You approached it cautiously, decided to sit and open up the present. You handled the bag carefully, finding an elegant white card sitting inside. 

For my favorite girl on her birthday.

Love, Daddy. 

You sighed, knowing he probably picked all of this out before you betrayed him and probably ruined any sort of trust he had between you. You hadn’t even realized it was your birthday which was probably due to the fact that you had no phone or any contact with the outside world. There was also a jewelry box inside, a gorgeous, rose-gold tennis bracelet inside. 

As you snapped it around your wrist, covering your bruises, you promised not to ask how much it cost. It would probably make you feel even worse about yesterday. 

You finished getting dressed, deciding to head downstairs for breakfast. You found Steve sitting at a table out by the pool, reading through a newspaper like a grandpa. It seemed like he was expecting you because there were pancakes and eggs waiting on the table, “Morning,” You greeted awkwardly. 

“Good morning, doll. Happy Birthday,” He responded, his eyes still focused on the newspaper. 

“Thanks,” Taking a seat in front of him, you instantly moved to grab the syrup, but the rings on his finger caught your attention. Below, you could see his knuckles were red and purple, bruised like he’d been punching something … or someone. “Your hands …” 

He folded his newspaper, taking a look at them himself. It didn’t seem to faze him as he folded them on his stomach, leaning back in his chair, “Your wrist,” He changed the subject and you wondered if he was amused by the fear in your eyes, “Do you like my gift?”

“Yeah, it’s beautiful, I love it … thank you,” Your mind was elsewhere, “What happened to your hands? Is that from last night?”

“Last night is a blur. I was so angry after your little stunt, I had to have a few drinks to even get through the rest of the night.”

“Really?” You tried to hold in your scoff, “You seem very chipper today.”

“Only because I get to see your beautiful face,” He countered, smirking. 

Your eyes narrowed at him, “What did you do?”

“That’s a broad question-”

“Did you hurt him?”

“Him?” Steve raised an eyebrow, “You mean Peter? I thought about it … I’m still thinking about it actually. If he was smarter, yesterday would have never happened but you must’ve been pretty convincing. Poor kid, he probably thought you liked him.”

“None of it was his fault! I-I was just being stupid, I was using him and he was just trying to be a good guy. Steve, please.”

“If I did, you would probably start to actually listen. You’d never try one of those crazy stunts ever again-”

“I will listen! No more stunts, I’ll be an angel from now on,” You stood up from your chair, moving around the table, “I know you’re just trying to protect me. Peter tried to tell me that and I should’ve listened.” You grabbed a hold of his hand, squeezing it tightly. 

“That’s all I want,” He added sincerely and you nodded. 

“I’ll pinky promise,” With your other hand, you held out your pinky. You thought Peter would be your way out but, here you were, begging to stay in order to keep him alive. Your pinkies wrapped around each other and you climbed into his lap. You kissed the sides of his mouth before kissing his lips. 

“Soon, we’ll take a trip together, I know you’re itching to get away.” 

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” You kissed his lips again, “Your hands … what actually happened?”

“Punching bag,” He easily explained although you were expecting a tale of horror. Holding his hand, you brought his fist to your lips, kissing them gently, “That probably wouldn’t have happened a year ago … I think you make me more gentle.”

“That’s a lot of pressure, don’t you think? Turning a beast into a prince.”

“For some reason, I have faith in you.”

+

“Peter!” You perked up as soon as he entered the living room, not realizing how grateful to see that he was still in one piece. Sam, Bucky, and Steve seemed to exchange confused glances from their places on the couch. 

Peter seemed baffled as well, “Am I in trouble or something?”

“No, we’re about to watch Coco. Wanna join?”

“There’s popcorn,” Sam added, stuffing his face.

“And cookies,” Bucky chimed in. 

Peter smiled, unsure, as he looked to Steve for permission, “Join us, son.”

“Awesome,” Peter clapped, making his way over to the couch, “This one always makes me cry.”

“Y/N, I thought you said this one wasn’t sad,” Bucky eyed you. You shrugged, snuggling yourself further into Steve’s side. You tried to hide a mischievous smile and act like you weren’t hoping to see three grown men tear up from a Disney movie. 

“Okay, press play,” You tapped Steve’s chest and he raised the remote. 

“Wait,” Steve paused, “Are all three of your nails painted?”

+

i’m thinking maybe i’ll make a christmas themed part 3, we shall see :)

[robotic-suffering]

What I Want for the Sylvanian Families/Calico Critters Franchise

Although I absolutely love this franchise, there are some things I wish it would do or at least do better

Re-release of older building sets

When I say this, I don't mean the houses or log cabins. I mean stuff like the post office, toy shop, etc. I'm just a sucker for bigger playsets even though I don't have the space for them

Re-release of the Urban Life series

I just discovered these guys and absolutely fell in love with them. Then I found out they debuted in the 1980s and (some) were Japanese exclusives 😭. I would like for them to be brought back (with all their babies included). If y'all can do it for the Puddleford family, then I know y'all can do it for the others. If they ever do, please keep them dressed exactly like how they were originally were

More Celebration Sets pls!

I know that selling families separate garners more money (perfect marketing strategy) but I'd rather pay for a box containing all of the family members (including grandparents, older siblings, aunts/uncles, & babies) than buying them individually. Plus, it'd be easy to collect and complete a lot of families that way

Why is Easy Buy not so easy to find?

I very rarely see any Easy Buy sets (with the exception of Sylvanian storekeepers) and when I do they are stupidly expensive. I thought the point of "Easy Buy" meant that they were also easy to access and purchase. It kinda reminds me about the Budget LOL OMG dolls from the Swim series. They sold two different versions (one w/articulation & one w/o articulation). However, I've never seen them in stores, not even dollar stores but they go for a lot online.

Another thing with the Easy Buy families is that the babies are separated from the other 3 family members. Why not just make it a 4-pack? Again it's probably a marketing strategy but the completionist in me is hurt by how difficult it is for me to find their babies. I was lucky enough to get the Devon cat and Oswald rabbit babies when I did but I will forever kick my ass for not getting the Applewood family when they were still around.

Give others time to shine!

I’ve noticed that a lot of individual, duo & trio sets are/include a Chocolate rabbit and/or a Persian cat. Now, I know Freya/Bell is the mascot, so of course they would use her and her family in merchandise, and I also love the Persians. However, I feel like they’re in too much merch. I think other characters should get their time in the limelight y’know?

Boy Twins

When I say twins, I’m referring to the case of the Persian cat twins and the Marlowe charcoal/tuxedo cat twins. Strangely enough, both sets of twins are female cats. So, I’d like an official set of twin boys who aren’t cats. I could make my own with duplicates but an official set would be cool

Cold one with the boys

I don’t think I’m alone when I say this but the guys in this franchise are heavily overshadowed and casted to the side. (😐: Me at the 3-packs where the son is always removed). The ladies get an abundance of gorgeous outfits and accessories while the guys get scraps. I mean look at the Snow rabbit family!

All the girlies got drip while the dad & son are just… there. I know what you’re gonna say: “They do have outfits for the dudes!” “Just get duplicates and/or switch around clothes!” “Make custom clothes!” Yes, they do have clothes for them but it’s so little compared to the ladies. I don’t like buying duplicates or redressing that much and I cannot make clothes for them sadly. Let my boys be stylish and have variety!

Only the horses! (Praying at least one of y’all knows that song)

Bring back the horses! I’m dying for a horse racing set (if there isn’t one already)

Alright, I’m gonna add more later bc it’s like 5 in the morning and I haven’t slept in a couple of hours. Sorry for the absence and have a good day/night! 👋

Oh and feel free to add any things you’d like for the franchise to do! I’m curious about your opinions

[isthisthingeven0n]

too little too late : j.w

brief summary: after an argument with jeff, you refuse to leave your bedroom and lock him out until he apologises for his actions (1k)

requested: yes by an anon!  warnings: angsty , but a happy ending i promise 

all my links

(everything on my blog is my own writing. if it is shared on another page or website know it hasn’t been approved me unless specified. all rights reserved. - i have to start doing this as I had some shit on my other blog with plagiarism)

DO NOT STEAL MY WORK - IT IS ALL MY OWN WRITING

“I just don’t fucking care! What about that don’t you understand?” Jeff yells, unable to stop the scoff leaving his lips as silence falls between you both.

There had been plenty of times in his life where Jeff knew he took things too far, scraped on the edge of humour into hurt. But he should’ve known looking at you after he raised his voice and saw tears brimming in your eyes he’d definitely taken it too far.

“I’m sorry, Y/n,” Jeff speaks softly as you shake your head, walking toward him.

A sliver of hope lines in Jeff’s heart as you stretch your arms out, resting them on his chest. “Get out.” You mutter and push with all your might causing Jeff to lose the last bit of hope that he hadn’t ruined things.

“Y/n, please,” Jeff tries to talk, but you ignore him until he’s stepping backwards, giving in as you slam the bedroom door in his face, turning the lock to ensure privacy. “fuck.” Resting his head against the door, Jeff sighs as he can hear you crying on the other side of the door, alone.

Turning away in defeat, Jeff walks with his tail between his legs into the living room to see several faces greeting him.

“What?” Jeff asks as Zane sighs whilst Heath and Matt lower their heads. Todd is the only person to look Jeff in the eyes as he shakes his head.

“You really didn’t hold back there.” Jonah comments as he walks into the living room from the kitchen, Nerf following behind him. “We could all hear you from out here.”

“You all heard that?” Jeff questions quietly, shame beginning to cloud his mind as Todd rises to his feet.

Patting Jeff's shoulder, Todd walks toward the spare bedroom as Jeff follows. Once the door is closed, Todd leans against it before turning to face his friend.

“Why would you say all that to Y/n?” Todd doesn’t hesitate to ask as he rests his hands on his hips whilst Jeff sinks into the bed.

“I don’t know,” Jeff starts as he thinks over the argument, how it started as a minor disagreement and escalated to new heights. “she just wouldn’t stop encouraging me with this new series we’re planning.” Jeff mutters, faintly hearing you in his mind telling him how good of an opportunity it’ll be if he just focuses on it.

“How awful, your girlfriend supports and encourages you?” Todd sarcastically remarks. “Are you guys not doing so good, is that it?”

“Not at all.” Jeff quickly responds. “She’s, she’s the perfect girl.” He smiles to himself, knowing it’s true. “It’s just been difficult lately, with us both at home now all the time and our work schedules are never in sync.” He carries on to explain in a calm manner whilst Todd listens.

“You gotta just talk to her, dude. Be calm, and collected. Oh, but apologise first.” Todd states as he sits beside his friend. “Just tell her the truth.” Todd adds.

“I can do that.” Jeff mutters as he and Todd clap their hands together before Jeff walks out of the bedroom and straight towards the locked door.

Standing outside of the door, Jeff raises his fist and knocks three times.

Silence follows until he hears you move around the rooom. “Fuck off, Jeff.” You sternly state as you wipe your eyes, officially tired of crying.

“No, I won’t, baby.” Jeff softly tells you, resting his hand on the door. “I want to talk to you, I owe you an explanation.” He pauses as you scoff loudly.

“Understatement of the century.” You mutter under your breath as you cross your arms.

“What I said earlier, when I yelled at you it was completely out of line and you don’t deserve that, ever.” He continues, leaning against the door now as he glances down to the handle, hoping to see it move. “And I can’t say I have a valid excuse for it, but it’s been hard lately, being here all the time and with our different schedules, I’m just feeling lost.”

You uncross your arms as you listen to him intently, having noticed the signs over the past few weeks. Jeff starts work later in the day and doesn’t finish until the early hours of the morning. Whereas you start at the crack of dawn, finishing not long after he sits down to edit videos.

“I shouldn’t have taken it out on you, and tell you that I don’t care because I do.” Jeff sighs. “I care so fucking much about what you think, about your opinions and advice. Honestly, Y/n, you’re the best person I’ve ever met.” His voice trails off as he inhales deeply. “So please, open the door doll, I wanna tell you the rest in person.”

Hesitantly, you reach down and turn the lock. Jeff can feel his heart rise at the sound of that quiet click, followed by the door handle bending and the door opening.

He watches as you appear behind the door, dried tears lining your cheeks as you smile weakly to him. “Hi.” You mutter, sniffing loudly as you fiddle with the hems of one of his many hoodies you now own.

“Oh Y/n,” Jeff steps closer and wraps his arms tightly around you. “I’m so sorry, truly, I am.” He mumbles into your hair as you bury your face into his chest, holding on with all your might as you force back a sob.

“It’s okay, Jeff.” You tell him as you loosen your grip around his waist, leaning back so you can look at him clearly. “What else did you want to say?” You ask, raising a brow.

“Oh,” Jeff chuckles under his breath before lifting one hand up and cups your cheek. “I love you, Y/n.”

You lift your hand up, resting it on top of his. “And you think I care?” You retort, watching his face fall for a moment before laughing light heartedly. “Baby, I’m kidding!”

Jeff rolls his eyes as you move your hand to the back of his neck.

“I love you too, doofus.” You mutter before closing the space between you both, forgetting the argument ever happened.

[thunderheadfred]

🤚The Second Worst (Pt. 1/?)🤚

Part 2 of my Shigaraki Thesis Headcanons. HC's // The Second Worst: 1 - 2

The half-mad ghost of Shimura Tenko is in love with you, and your life is about to become a tragic wreck. -- AKA here's when I gave up on bullet points and went off the fuckin rails

I'm self-conscious about writing so much, so uhhhh, please be kind, hahaaa. This is rather long and involved. Are these still even HCs or just a self-indulgent AU outline? There are some mysteries we may never solve.

This is on AO3 now, if you prefer reading there. Anyway. Minors do not interact.

- - - - -

You met Tenko before the League existed.

Believe it or not, there are a million ways it might have happened, but in the end: you were both bargain-binning in Akihabara.

You reached for a copy of a collectible bullet-hell cute-'em-up (near-mint! CIB!!!) and accidentally bonked hands with a complete stranger. He flinched about five million feet away from you. Ouch. You're just a nobody, quirkless and average, but you didn't think you were THAT repulsive.

(You're not. Hell, even if you were, this guy couldn't care less. He barely registers that you have a face.)

(Shigaraki is accustomed to getting in and out of this shop in seconds. He always comes in before anyone else and goes straight home. -- Is that really home? Is 'home' a real place? -- ANYWAY he's already pirated this shit, god, why does he even care? He doesn't need to be here. Father doesn't like it. Is that why he's here? Just to do something Father doesn't like? That's pathetic.)

He's had at least ten complete internal arguments with himself before he so much as looks at you.

You know in the tenth of a second he actually meets your eyes... this fucker is going to fight you to the death over this game.

- - - The death match ends in a draw. He was not expecting you to know the first fucking thing about this game. Nobody knows about it, even in Japan. Who the fuck do you even think you are? Oh, no, he's still taking it. But... maybe he can show you how to play it it. He'll give you a little taste, just to make you jealous. He's got his hoodie pulled down like he's going to commit an act of terrorism. What little you can see of his face looks twitchy and messed up. If you have any survival instincts at all, they're kicking in right about now. But... why not. You're not going anywhere with this dude unsupervised, so you suggest a crowded web cafe down the street. The cafe has the necessary console... but the retro gaming booth is laughably small. The TV is about four inches across and you end up having to practically sit in his lap. You were sure this guy was a nasty fucking creep, but he's................ only mostly terrible. Way too angry, for sure. Has no idea how to have a normal, friendly conversation. Inadvertently insults you every other sentence and seems to have a deep-seated persecution complex.

You'd prefer to be mad about the awful company, but... he's obviously deprived of human contact. When it's established that you two share a lot of media fixations, he calms down and starts treating you a little more like a human being. Or at least like a fellow elite.

Wherever he came from, he doesn't seem to want to go back. He keeps pushing you to play one more level, pretending he wants to beat your score. You feel kinda bad for him. You get the distinct feeling that his life is a disaster. He looks like he's never had a full night of sleep in his life. He trips your trigger hairs in that 'is he gonna follow me home?' kind of way, but... up close, he's a lot more depressing than scary. At the very least, you want to buy him a stupidly cute dessert. Just... as thanks. For letting you try out the game and stuff. It's not a big deal, so just pick a flavor, okay? The world isn't actually that awful, y'know.

It's not even that impressive... Definitely not a great cafe. But he takes practically a full hour to eat a single slice of strawberry cake.

When the hoodie comes down. He's all shriveled and dried out, like someone left him him in the desert to die. He chews on his peeling bottom lip and nervously scratches his neck. He doesn't thank you for the cake. Which is fine. It's not a big deal. Actually, you wish he would eat faster; you feel weirdly responsible for him now.

Under all that mess he's... gorgeous? His hair is stunning: a bright, gleaming silver that catches the light. His bone structure is flawless. If it weren't for all the scars and the misanthropic slouch, he'd look like a fairy fucking prince.

You were not prepared for that. In another life he could have been a model, the type of guy who would never even look at you. But something bad happened to him. Something... very bad. Do you even want to know? You have no idea how to ask. Has anyone ever been nice to him? It doesn't seem like it. Should YOU be nice to him? You sort of want to try. - - - This becomes a regular thing. This weird little secret. You should probably tell someone when you see him, just in case you don't come back one day, but you say nothing; how the hell would you explain why you want to see him so bad? You don't know his full name. Maybe he's on a watch list. When he gives you a long string of random numbers so you can schedule meet-ups (is THAT his e-mail, really?) he tells you to just... call him Tenko. Or whatever. It doesn't matter. (He sneaks out when Father is deep in his plots. As long as he comes home on time, it doesn't really matter where he goes, right?) He brings a different game every time. He has an insane collection. Where does he get the money for all this? You know he doesn't work. God, is it drugs? It's probably drugs. Wherever these hidden gems came from, he proudly shows them off to you, like he's never had an audience before. It's sort of cringe-inducing, the way he one-ups and rubs every little victory in your face, desperate for attention.

But at the same time, you are becoming too... something...to mind. Do you... like him? He's not funny, but he thinks you are. His mouth is huge when he laughs. He seems to hate everyone but you, and you've had to earn the distinction of being merely tolerable. Still, he gets really excited about random shit like the garage kit black market and haunted dolls and the price of weed on the dark web.

And... strawberry cake. The realization hits you both at the same time when the waitress brings one piece with two forks. God, what the fuck, are you... are you dating? Quick, think. You look forward to seeing him, and don't even mind sitting close to him anymore. Sometimes you push your leg up against him just to see if he'll still flinch away... and he doesn't.

You jealously notice the way he touches everything but you: with delicate precision, one finger at a time. His large, elegant hands always have a pinky up like he's aspiring for a fiefdom, and you wonder what his skin feels like. You go home and dwell on the way he plucks flowering weeds out of the pavement in front of the cafe. The way he stands rooted to the spot as you leave, just... looking at nothing, unsmiling.

You watch his lips too much, and not just because you want to buy him chapstick. You catch him gaping at you all the time. You thought he was just creepy like that, but maybe... Yeah. I guess you are dating him. Shit. - - - Okay, so, yeah. Bringing him back to your place was definitely a bad idea. You know you shouldn't trust him, even if he is... apparently... your boyfriend? Sort of? You still don't have his phone number. So. Um. What now? You order overpriced pizza and queue up a campy horror movie. What the fuck are you even doing. You don't really think he's going to murder you anymore, but... still. Is the suburban massacre scene gonna give him ideas? Turns out, no. He doesn't like gore, even when the blood is neon pink. He gets upset. Like, really upset. Shaky and green, like he might puke on you. He can't stop scratching that scaly spot on his neck.

Tenko, are you crying? Fucking hell, did you just trigger him? Of course he has a traumatic past, it's carved all over his face. You're so fucking stupid. You don't know how to make it right. You want to hug him, kiss him... anything. But he's never really touched you, and you're too afraid to push now. It ruins the whole night. He leaves without explaining anything. Doesn't even say goodbye. He just. Leaves. Maybe you'll never see him again. Maybe that's for the best. Your chest hurts. - - - He shows up at your door a few weeks later. You haven't heard from him since that disastrous movie night. You had pretty much accepted that you'd broken up with a boyfriend you never actually had. But no. Apparently not.

This time, he’s brought his own entertainment. He's holding a boxed set of some show you're not familiar with. You're distracted by these weird little half-gloves he's wearing, like a cyberpunk hacker. That's a new look, and even if it's a bit edgelord adjacent, he makes it look cool. You tell him as much. It's the first time you've let on how attractive you find him. He's wearing a tight black shirt with a deep, deep V-neck. That's distracting too.

He clears his slender throat and doesn't look at you.

You try to apologize for before, but he's acting like it never happened. What are you even talking about? Have you seen this OVA or not? Get out of the way and let him in already. You've watched three episodes now, but you still have no idea what this stupid anime is about. You can't pay attention to a single frame. All you can think about is how his arm has crept up behind your shoulders. A few inches more and he'll be holding you. Does he... want to hold you? You lean toward him so slowly your spine creaks. One molecule at a time. After a thousand years, your head slides nervously under his chin. His arm comes down, locking you in, fingers clutching your sleeve in a death grip. Even that snobby little pinky. His head tucks down into you hair. A sharp collarbone bites into your cheek. His heartbeat is hard, fast, and irregular. There's not a scrap of fat on him, and as you wrap your arm around his stomach, you think you see a twitch in his pants. Is that just you being desperate? Or... hopeful? This is really happening. --- Soon, you learn that Tenko is a clumsy kisser. It doesn't matter; the fact that he's kissing you at all is good enough for now. His lips are dry, but not half as dry as you expected. There's a slick of menthol helping things along; he's been using something medicated on his lips. Plus, his mouth tastes like he drank a gallon of mouthwash.

All this thrills you more than a little, because it means he came here wanting to impress you. Wanting you. Full stop. Underneath that minty sting is a strange, worrisome aftertaste, like something rotten. Your brain fires off an alarm. Stop kissing him. Right now. This thing will make you sick. But his hands nervously slide over your body... and you decide not to worry about it. Instead, you kiss him deeper. He makes a sweet, startled little noise. Your brain is a fucking liar. It occurs to you he's probably never done this before.

When you lace your fingers in his and try to pull one of his gloves off, he rips his hand away.

Don't. That’s the only explanation he gives.

No need to ask if it's a quirk thing or a trauma thing. Judging by how jittery he gets, it's probably both. You remember the way his hands almost float over objects without ever holding them. Maybe his touch is dangerous. Maybe that's why his face looks like that.

Maybe you should learn more about him before things go way too far...

No. It can't be that bad. Now that he's in your arms, everything frightening about him evaporates. He's vulnerable. He's alone. He's shaking a little. Has anyone else ever seen this side of him? You want to keep him all to yourself, just like this.

So what if he has to touch you with gloves on? You've heard of worse quirk-related inconveniences.

It's okay, Tenko. Do you want to keep going?

You put his hands back on you and wait for him to kiss you again. It doesn't take long.

---

You open his pants. He's long and thin, calloused even here. Every part of him feels untouched, unloved. You hold him tight and squeeze.

It doesn't seem to occur to him to please you in return. He looks afraid. Confused. You're sure you scared him earlier with the glove thing. Is this too much? No. He gasps and leans into you. The tiniest, broken please.

He cums in your hand right away, face buried in your shoulder, his eyes wet and hidden.

I have to go, he says. Over and over and over.

It's okay, Tenko.

You know he doesn't want to.

- - - - - (oops I wrote more)

[gabriel-agreste-has-no-rights]

Rating: G

Summary: While Luka is throwing out his Jagged Stone merch, he and XY have a heart-to-heart in a dumpster.  Takes place after the episode "Truth."  For @luxyweek 2021

Word Count:  1,594

XXX

Rebuilding a whole personality wasn’t fun, to say the least.  

No.  No, he was sick of saying the least.  Rebuilding his personality sucked.

This whole freaking week sucked.

Luka swept his guitar pick collection into a plastic trashbag.  He tried not to flinch as Jagged’s face seemed to wink at him as it tumbled in.  He grit his teeth, but kept going.  This was no time to lose his nerve.

The old Luka took what everyone gave him.  The old Luka kept waiting.  Waiting, waiting, waiting for things to change.

For Marinette to love him back.

For Mom to tell him the truth.

For Jagged to follow through on his promise.

Jagged wasn’t going to call.  They weren’t going to make a song together.  Luka didn’t want to, not anymore.  He didn’t want to be his dad’s—his backup guitarist.  

He squeezed the neck of his guitar, but set it back on his bed.  Maybe he’d never pick it up again, but it wouldn’t go in the dumpster.  Jules would kill him if he threw out a perfectly good instrument like that.

Jules.  She was taking all this in stride—she said that she was used to being forgotten.  Expected it, really.  Knowing the name of the man who’d forgotten her didn’t change anything.

Then again, Jagged hadn’t looked her in the face and chosen Adrien instead.

That was months ago now, but Luka still seethed at the memory.  Jagged had taken Marinette’s guitarist recommendation like it was gospel—he visited her bakery, praised her sunglasses—but he couldn’t even spare a phone call for his son?

He wasn’t jealous of Marinette and Adrien.  Not really.  But the way Marinette effortlessly connected with his dad… that pain dug in its painted nails, and wouldn’t let go.

Posters crumpled and tossed in the bag.  Vinyls followed.  CD cases, t-shirts… man, he was going to have to get some new clothes.  How had Mom let him fill over half of his closet with Jagged Stone merch, knowing what she did?

He clenched his fists so hard his palms hurt.

This was so, so screwed up.

In the end it took three trash bags.  He hauled them over his shoulders like some kind of grunge Santa Claus.  Mom and Jules weren’t around to comment as he walked the plank back to the street.  Jules was probably at Rose’s house, and Mom… who knew where Mom went when she wasn’t home?  Maybe she was off with some other famous loser, like Bob Roth, or— 

Luka paused a few meters from the dumpster.

“XY?”

He’d recognize that tall troll-doll hair anywhere, even covered in… substances that Luka was better off not knowing.  It also helped that his name was on the giant necklace over his bare chest.  

XY slung his arm over the edge of the dumpster.

“Look, if you want an autograph, you’re gonna have to wait like—oh.”  He blinked at Luka.  “It’s just you.  Well, you can get your own dumpster.  This one’s taken.”

“I—I’m not here for the dumpster?”  He blinked back.  The sight of a shirtless XY dumpster diving… it was enough to shock him out of his spiral of rage.  “I mean, I’m here for the dumpster, but I was—just taking out the trash.  What are you doing here?  ...And where’s your shirt?”

“Didn’t want it to get slimy.  And you know what they say, homeslice.  One man’s trash is another man’s next hit single.”  XY held up a stained pigeon plush before dropping it again.

“Uh… no.  No one says that.”

“Whatever, breadslice!  Just gimme your garbage if you’re gonna be such a hater about it.”

Luka sighed.  What was he supposed to do?  Actually find another dumpster?

“You’ll be disappointed.”  He tossed the first of the trash bags up to XY.  “I know I was.”

XY ripped open the thin plastic and scowled.

“What the heck, man?  This really is garbage.”  He held one of the Jagged Stone shirts up to his chest.

“That’s what I told you.”

“No, I mean—this is the kinda garbage you like, though, right?”

“How would you know?”  Luka frowned.

“Stalked your YouTube after ripping off your music.”  XY shrugged.  “Don’t worry, I didn’t steal anything else.  Dad doesn’t need my help with that anymore.”

Luka shook his head.  He was never going to escape Jagged Stone.  It wasn’t like he could take down all Kitty Section’s music videos, videos where he wore Jagged’s merch, covered his songs…

“You got anything else down there?”  XY called.

“See for yourself.”  Luka tossed the other two bags.  They were both met with groans of disappointment.

“I can’t rip off Jagged Stone.  I already tried that.”

“Don’t bother.  He’s not worth ripping off.”  Luka crossed his arms and leaned against the dumpster.  He was probably getting his hoodie—one of the few pieces of clothing he still owned—dirty, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.

“Huh.  You’re a weird guy, Lu.”

“Says the one who’s waist-deep in a dumpster.”

“Nowhere to go but up then, right?”  XY gave a nasal laugh.  

What was wrong with him?  He was a famous popstar; he shouldn’t be out here sounding happy to dig in the trash.  What else had he said?  His dad didn’t need his help?

“Did you get fired or something?”  Luka asked bluntly.  He might not have Truth’s powers anymore, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t get answers.

“Eh.  Or something, I guess.”  XY shrugged.  “Does it count as getting fired if you get permanently replaced with a hologram?”

Luka grimaced.  “Probably.”

“Oh.”  XY was quiet for a moment.  “Then yeah.  I’m fired… but only until I find some real inspiration and show Dad I’m not useless!”

Luka snorted.  He wished he could be surprised, but apparently that was just what fathers in the music industry did.  Threw away their kids as soon as they were inconvenient.

“What!  You saw my cardboard costume!  I made that all by myself, y’know, and I can do it again!”

“Sorry. I wasn’t laughing at you.”  Luka climbed up onto the lip of the dumpster and perched there.  It smelled horrid, but it felt easier to talk to XY face-to-face.  “I just don’t see the point.  Of trying to prove you’re not useless.”

XY snapped one of the Jagged Stone records in half.  Stupidly, Luka still flinched at the sound.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”  XY scowled.

“Sorry.  I’m still… everything comes out wrong.”

“No it doesn’t.”  XY pouted.  “Not for you.”

“Now it’s my turn to ask what that means.”

“You can—you just—your music is real!”  XY threw his arms in the air.  “My dad would kill to have a kid like you.”

Luka couldn’t help laughing.  The irony was just too rich.

“Shut up!”  XY threw half of the record at him.  Luka didn’t even have to lean to dodge it.

“Sorry!  I—my dad pretended I didn’t exist!”

XY paused with the other half of the record still poised to throw.  Slowly his arm lowered, until he dropped the broken vinyl to the pile of trash.

“Oh.  Uh.  That’s rough, dude.”

Luka shrugged.  Man, this was awkward.  XY was probably the only one who was too self-absorbed to have seen the news, but Luka took that as a mercy.  It was nice that someone saw him for him, and not as Jagged’s reject.   

“It’s fine.  I didn’t know he existed, either.  Sort of.”  He wasn’t about to explain the situation in detail.

“Huh.”  XY rubbed the back of his already-messy hair.  “We could always swap places.  Parent Trap-style.  You can have my crappy dad, and I’ll beat yours up for you.”

He flexed a bicep, which was surprisingly defined.  Climbing in and out of dumpsters must have done something for XY’s physique.

“Heh.  I’d almost take you up on that, but I can’t stand Bob Roth either.”

XY pursed his lips and nodded.  “Fair, cheeseslice.”

“I preferred ‘breadslice.’”  Luka smiled a little.

“Really?  I’m trying to pick up some new slang.  Y’know, since I’ll probably have to rebrand.”  He flashed his hand sign, then mimed it blowing up.  Complete with dramatic explosion noises.  “You think I’d look good in your old t-shirts?”

Luka’s brow furrowed.  “I thought you said they were garbage.”

“Eh, Dad says I’m an awful judge of quality.”

“Your dad sucks,” Luka said bluntly.  “And so do those clothes.  But, speaking of rebranding… that’s why I’m throwing all this out.  I’m looking for a fresh start, too.”

He couldn’t believe he was saying this to XY of all people, but maybe the popstar was exactly who he needed.  Someone the old Luka would’ve never spoken too.  Someone who, despite everything, understood some of Luka’s pain.

“So if you want to get out of this dumpster… we could go shopping.  If you want.  Get some new stuff.”  He shrugged, as if it wasn’t a big deal.  As if he had plenty of friends he could go shopping with if XY said no.

A friend.  Did XY even count as a friend?  All they’d done was have one conversation in a dumpster.

“That sounds dope!”  XY beamed.  “I’ve never gone shopping with a real breadslice before!”

Luka blinked before letting out a genuine laugh.  Who would’ve known XY could be so funny?  Maybe this was the real him, the one that wasn’t tied down by his dad’s expectations.  That’s what Luka hoped, anyway.

He held out a hand to pull XY out of the garbage, and into a new chapter in their lives.