#multipart: ever changing ever growing

[yeetmeoutthewindowdaddy]

A deep dive into Zevlor's devotion (Part 2) Elturel's history and culture, the Hellriders, and Zevlor's paladin oath:

THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR BG3.

These series of posts were originally one loooooong post— but apparently Tumblr has a character limit, and I found it; so now it's been split into several parts/posts.

(Part 1) Everybody hates tieflings, and how discrimination impacted a young Zevlor

((Part 2, this post, is for providing historical and sociological information on Elturel, paladins and their oaths, and the Hellriders. The third part is where the meat of my Zevlor analysis is.))

(Part 2.5)

(Part 3) Zevlor's actions during Act 1, an analysis of a man who is barely holding on.

(Part 4) Zevlor's actions during Act 2, an analysis of a broken man.

(Part 5) Zevlor in a romantic relationship.

(Part 6) Zevlor's actions during/ after the epilogue, not all endings are happily ever after— especially not for a tiefling.

(Part 7) Zevlor in a romantic relationship.

I don't think many bg3 players understand just how dedicated and loyal of a person Zevlor is. This ADHD hyper-fixation fueled multipart-thesis is meant to show how Zevlor's past is as tragic as any of the origin characters'/ Durge's. It's meant to show how horrifically broken Zevlor was when he "betrayed" the other tieflings. It's also meant to show that our beloved blorbo would probably be fervently obsessive if he was in a romantic relationship.

Most importantly: It demonstrates how our favorite man Zevlor was most likely a fanatical religious zealot my dudes. He was (probably) a part of the Faerûn equivalent of the Spanish Inquisition lite.

I have kept this as factual as I am able to. Please keep in mind that Baldur's Gate 3 plays it fast and loose with the DND/ Forgotten Realms canon and lore, on top of DND/ the Forgotten Realms itself regularly disregarding and changing it's own lore and canon. DND lore and canon as a whole is a mess. It has multiple universes that sometimes interact and are maybe separate from each other. Full disclosure; I've mixed 1e-5e lore together FUCK 5.5e, because parsing through what is currently considered canon is a nightmare. As far as I'm concerned, as long as a piece of lore was canon at some point in the past 50 years— it's fair game. @y-rhywbeth2 in this post has a more in depth disclaimer. Also please check out their headcanons and lore breakdowns, they're so good.

THIS PROJECT TOOK ME OVER A MONTH TO WRITE. I've tried to find all grammatical and spelling errors. I've tried to ensure that I've cited the correct sources in the correct places.

Before reading this way to long of a post please check out (the much more succinct) @gortashs-skidmark history of Elturel and Zevlor headcanons [alt].

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● (Part 1) Elturel's History and Culture:

[A/N: I refer to Elturel as a city, a city-state, and a realm. They don't mean the same thing, but I've used them interchangeably here because Elturel is simultaneously a city, a city-state, and a realm (known as Elturgard). Kind of similar to how the UK, England, and Great Britain are all used to describe the British Isles.]

Elturel was a port city located in the Western Heartlands along the Chionthar River.

"The river linked it... to Baldur's Gate on the Sword Coast... it was a center for agriculture and trade in the region, and was renowned for its elite mounted defenders, the Hellriders."

All Elturians were horse girls loved horses. Just as every child in Waterdeep leaned how to swim, every child in Elturel learned how to ride a horse.

"Elturians were practically raised in the saddle, learning how to ride and growing familiar with how horses behaved in any situation, even those that never became Hellriders. The downside was that, rightly or wrongly, some folk thought Elturians always smelled of horse."— https://forgottenrealms.fandom.com/wiki/Elturel#Culture_&_Society

Elturel claimed ownership over nearby cities and lands by declaring themselves their "protectorates"— thus becoming the realm Elturgard. (In other words they were holier-than-thou and patronizing in their attitude towards the cities they took over.)

"In the late 15th century DR, it was the capital of the realm of Elturgard... through a variety of excuses, Elturel had laid claim to the lands of its neighbors, placing them within "Elturel's Guard" as they called it... with the aim of bringing righteous judgment to all the Realms and "setting Faerûn aright"..."

Elturel was an authoritarian theocracy which was so pious that you could get into trouble for cursing in public.

"Elturel was known as a holy city... and it was ruled by its high priest, the High Observer of Torm… Even bad language and irreverent humor could draw the ire of authorities. Elturgard's laws were rigid, intolerant, and persecuted evil with inquisitorial zeal..."

Saying they had inquisitorial zeal was not a figure of speech, they actually had inquisitions.

"They ensured the city and countryside remained safe and well-policed... [through] rigid laws, intolerant attitudes, and inquisitions circa 1479 DR... Just rumoring about a possible band of thieves was enough to see one interrogated by zealous Hellriders."

Elturel had a 3 strike policy, where upon the 3rd strike a criminal would be sent to the mines— which never had a shortage of prisoners. (By reading between the lines, I'm assuming that the law did not have much nuance or account for the severity of a crime. i.e.: Littering 3x would get one sent to prison along side murderers.)

"Those who broke the law three times were sent to the Dungeon of the Inquisitor... they were punished and set to work mining tunnels. The inmate population was always being replenished."

They were even willing to risk a loss of trade revenue if it meant that outsiders wouldn't bring their immorality into the city.

"After the founding of Elturgard, the port officials who handled trade in the city... were overly righteous and handed exorbitant taxes and penalties to traders who showed even the slightest impiety, even banning them from setting foot inside the city. The caravans and riverboat convoys now feared to pass through..."

The official religion of Elturel was Torm, but almost any good or neutral aligned god was allowed to be worshiped.

"In the late 1400s, the city's official faith was in Torm the True, the state religion of Elturgard. However, the people commonly worshiped Torm, Helm, Lathander, Amaunator, and Tyr."

Baldur's Gate was a rivaling competing port city and moral antithesis to Elturel, who they were constantly on the verge of war with.

"Its chief rival now was Baldur's Gate... Elturel regarded Baldur's Gate as lawless and corrupt, and disapproved of its religious tolerance... There was much animosity between them… [but] neither was looking forward to an armed conflict."

Along with the city guard (more like a military than a city guard, but I digress) every citizen swore a magically binding oath, the Creed Resolute, to defend the city.

"...He [Thavius Kreeg] eventually made all Elturians swear the Creed Resolute, binding them by oath to defend the city... The Creed Resolute was a set of oaths and maxims sworn by the paladins of the Order of the Companion of Elturgard and the Hellriders of Elturel, and eventually all Elturian citizens... Citizens who were old enough to read were required to put a hand on the Tome of the Creed Resolute and recite the oath. Once done, their name magically appeared in the book, thus recording all those who'd sworn to follow the Creed."

Elturel's primary city guard/ military were known as

● (Part 2) The Hellriders:

Training started as young as 12. (Which is how old Zevlor was when he enlisted.)

"Enlistment and training could begin as young as twelve. People came to Elturel from other lands just to join the Hellriders."

They swore an oath not only to the defend the realm, but also uphold its moral codes of conduct.

"...Hellriders followed the Creed Resolute... This had them swear to serve the High Observer and the greater good, uphold Elturgard's law, and permit no difference in faith to come between them... among other codes of behavior. If a Hellrider overstepped the limits of law or proper behavior, their comrades would admonish them to "recall the Creed"."

Hellriders were revered— and as the protectors of Elturel they were held to an even higher moral standard than the average citizen. Children dreamed of becoming a Hellrider, but it was difficult to actually become one.

"It was said that every [child] of Elturel and the lands around dreamed of being a Hellrider some day. To call such a child a 'hellion' was... a compliment, marking one as having the courage and drive to ride the Hellriders' destriers...the Hellriders and the Companions were held in highest regard. Both inspired the people to be devout in both their faith and the pursuit of justice."

Hellriders were not only revered in Elturel, but in many other places too. They were more powerful than some other nations entire armies.

"...an elite cavalry unit who acted as the primary armed force of the city of Elturel in the Western Heartlands...The Hellriders helped Elturel establish and maintain civilization in these harsh lands. They were one of the most renowned and well-regarded military forces... For a city guard, they outmatched the armies of whole realms."

The Hellriders were named as such because of their loyalty to one another. They were family. **insert Fast and Furious family meme**

"The warriors were close-knit and exceptionally loyal, both to each other and to their commanders... It was said that a company of Riders had once ridden into the Hells themselves— namely Avernus, the first layer... to rescue one of their own, such was their great loyalty to each other... and from this story, the Hellriders were named."

Becoming a Hellrider was for life. They were the literal definition of ride or die.

"To be a Hellrider was a job for life, no matter how short it turned out to be... In the mid-1360s DR, there were no living ex-members of the Hellriders—too many had died in battle."

The only way to resign from the Hellriders was to be sent on a suicide mission. If they somehow survived the mission then they'd be publicly known as a deserter, considered a heretic, and subsequently banished from Elturel without a pot to piss in.

"Those determined to resign were given a final mission involving very difficult tasks, and even if they succeeded, and survived, they were stripped of their gear, exiled from the city, and named a heretic in the eyes of Helm, God of Guardians, for abandoning their post."

These are merely the conditions for an average Hellrider-- we haven't even touched the diehard paladin sect known as

● (Part 3) The Order of the Companion:

Before Zevlor's time in the Hellriders there weren't many paladins in their ranks.

"There were few paladins in the Hellriders. However, in the late 1400s, members of the Hellriders could aspire to join the Order of the Companion, a paladin knighthood..."

But by the time Zevlor joined there was the Order of the Companion. And they were religious fanatics. They didn't just swear an oath to the city. No, they went the extra mile by swearing an oath to Elturel/ Elturgard on their personal patron god.

"...A well-armored mounted knighthood of paladins who defended the city and wider Elturgard, swore oaths to the realm and shared its goals, even if the members did not all share faith in Torm. Courageous, righteous, and zealous, they were proud of their dedication to the cause of good, their clear morals, even their intolerance... Although the state religion of Elturgard was that of Torm, and they all swore oaths to the realm, the Companions themselves followed various different gods...Many of the Hellriders now aspired to join the Companions."

The Order of the Companion, despite being newer and thus having less established prestige than the Hellriders, were revered with an amount of reverence similar to the Helriders.

"In the late 15th century, Elturian citizens still often dreamed of joining Elturgard's paladin knighthood. This time, many succeeded. Inspired by the Hellriders and the Companions, the folk of Elturgard were typically devout in both their faith and the pursuit of justice. Both troops were loved and respected by the people... The Companions were seen as the undoubted champions of the people of Elturgard, with even the lowest-ranking ready to sacrifice their lives to protect them, and in turn the people adored them. Disrespecting the Companions and their Creed would incur the rage of the common folk."

I'm speculating here, but I would imagine that the former head Hellrider being a vampire lead to the Hellriders losing the people's unwavering trust. The Order members did not have this mark against them. Their PR was also probably boosted because joining the Order was easier than joining the Hellriders.

(They were maybe racists? Interestingly, on the wiki for the Order of the companion only humans are listed under the race(s) of those who are members.)

Also they were fascists. [A/N: In Faerûn choosing a patron deity is akin to choosing a political party.]

"The paladins swore to follow and uphold the Creed Resolute... {A/N: the same creed the the Hellriders later adopted and (along with citizens) swore to.} If one of the Companions... even questioned the policies of the realm (such as exactly why there was a temple to Bane in Soubar), their comrades would admonish them to "recall the Creed" and the matter was resolved."

The Hellriders and the Order of the Companion were not one and the same-- but they often overlapped (so much so that I have simply given up in trying to parse which is which), in a similar vein as the army and the marines. This reddit user described it best:

"Order of the Companion are Paladins. Hellriders is a general name for the Elturel cavalry. The Knights of the Companion are all Hellriders, but not all Hellriders are Knights of the Companion. It's a club within the club. Previously, Elturel was ruled by a "High Rider" who was the highest military leader of the Hellriders. After the Companion arrived, rulership changed to a "High Observer" who was the leader of the Church of the Companion..."

You may be wondering; what in the sweet hells is

● (Part 4) The Companion:

~50 years before the game Elturel was being swarmed by vampires after it was found that the (now former) leader of the Hellriders and the city itself, the aforementioned High Rider, was a vampire.

"...the High Rider himself was discovered to be a vampire, with a vast network of vampire spawn, charmed minions, undead allies, and sycophantic collaborators that surprised even the Hellriders. Now exposed, the undead infested Elturel..."

The Hellriders could do little to tide the flow of the undead.

"...and whatever victories the Hellriders won during the days, they lost sorely in the nights."

A priest of Torm (and later the ruler of Elturel) would perform a "miracle" and summon an entity known as the Companion.

"...Thavius Kreeg, then a priest of Torm, pleaded to any power to save his city, and... his reckless prayer was answered—by the archdevil Zariel with a deal to which he hastily agreed. Though the city would receive its much-needed aid, it would last but fifty years, after which Zariel would take the whole city and its people. Thavius also swore to serve her in all ways for all time..."

And so Zariel created the Companion— which was actually the Solar Insidiator that would cause the city to fall into Avernus (Hell).

"The Companion, also known as Amaunator's Gift, was a magical second sun that hovered over the city of Elturel in Elturgard… It was the symbol of the realm and of its defenders, the Order of the Companion. However, it was in fact the Solar Insidiator, a device created by Zariel, archdevil of Avernus, as part of a plot to trap and steal the city away to the Nine Hells."

The Companion was basically a 2nd sun that always shone in Elturel.

"The light of this second sun illuminated the land day and night, and suffused all of Elturel... it produced no heat. Creatures and things vulnerable to daylight in some way, or... destroyed by it, were... vulnerable to the Companion's light. Thus it prevented darkling races and monsters from assailing the city. Undead of all kinds found it painful or were even burned by it, while creatures of darkness could not even bear to look at the city."

Don't feel too bad for Kreeg here, he's not like Wyll who made a selfless deal with a devil to save his beloved city and people. Kreeg was corrupt. He was why the people of Elturel unknowingly swore their souls to Zariel by having all citizens swear to the oath of the Creed Resolute.

"Taking the credit, Thavius was acclaimed as the savior of Elturel, and few would doubt his goodness or his intent. Only he knew the true origin of the mysterious second sun... [From this] Kreeg was raised to the position of High Observer himself some years later, following a crisis of leadership in Elturel and the unexplained but convenient disappearance of the likely successor, and his rival..."

Go read the wiki page on Zariel for her backstory and connection to Elturel and the Hellriders themselves, it's very fascinating.(LINK) Long story short: Fallen angel turned archdevil is salty about the Hellriders. She needs more souls for more power, and wouldn't you know it— there's a whole city that she already has some beef with she can claim from a desperate priest who's all to willing to sign it, and its people's souls, away to her.

That's it for part 2, I made (Part 2.5) Zevlor's Paladin Oath (link): because this post got too long.

Link to the other parts:

A deep dive into Zevlor's devotion series (master list)

[afteriwake]

Ever Changing, Ever Growing (6/6 - A “The Curious Case of Love & Family” Story)

And here’s the last chapter of this first story in the series! It’s a lime story, if I remember my citrus scale right, as there’s talk of sexual things but (a) it’s in Victorian-era terminology and (b) it’s not wholly explicit, so I think it’s safe to post here, just with that part behind a cut.

Ever Changing, Ever Growing - They make the arrangement to present what society wants from them to the world as husband and wife, but childhood friends Sherlock Holmes and Margaret Hooper agree that their lives are their own. But what happens when the agreement for their marriage of convenience is rewritten to allow experimentation of a more intimate nature between them?

READ CHAPTER 1 | READ CHAPTER 6 | SERIES PAGE | HELP ME SURVIVE? | COMMISSION ME? | BUY ME A KOFI?

They did, indeed, have separate rooms to rest in, and she took herself to the task of making her room feel like home with the help of Beatrice and Mary. Sherlock had to admit, he had not thought the three of them would get on so well, but they did and it pleased him. Margaret had always had few friends beside himself, he knew that, and seeing these two women help rouse her from the melancholy of her family’s reaction to the elopement was a balm he didn’t know he needed. Feminine laughter filled the halls of his abode, as did discussions of rights for women and whatever thoughts Beatrice had for turns of phrase or new stories to tell.

His abode was quickly becoming a home, he realized one evening a fortnight after the elopement. It was just he and Margaret, and he was smoking his pipe, looking over information on the asylum that the infamous Eurus had escaped from. He had gone there in person and had never seen a more dismal and dreary place. If this Eurus had wanted freedom, he could certainly see why.

Margaret was sitting in his favorite chair, her feet stretched out in front of her and heels on a stool, absolutely absorbed in a book on anatomy. Her reading spectacles were perched on the end of her nose and the only thing of note was how little she had on, wearing simply her nightclothes and a loose dressing-gown, and that her hair was down.

And he was struck by the odd thought that this was how it should be.

Not just her looking the way she did, but her being here, in his home, with him, as though she had always been there and rightfully belonged there. He was so caught up in the thoughts that perhaps his feelings of friendship for Margaret were growing into something fonder that it was the snap of her closing the book that caught his attention.

“I swear, I know a woman’s body better than this...this hack! And his theories are all wrong!” She glared at the book and then tossed it towards the other chair as she usually did with a tome or a newspaper she disagreed with and then lifted herself up to pace. “Hysteria is not related to women’s anatomy! It’s a charge made against women to confine them to their homes and under the thumb of the men in their lives. Though admittedly there may be some maladies cured by hysterical paroxysm, I think that it’s not the end of all medical treatments to treat women.”

Sherlock raised an eyebrow at her ranting, a fond smile on his face. “And what exactly do you know of hysterical paroxysms?”

"More than you," she said, crossing her arms. "They're very...liberating."

“Do you know from firsthand experience?” he asked, now more curious as Margaret turned a peculiar shade of red he had never seen before.

“Once. It was...it did not work the way Mother had supposed it would.” She flushed and turned aside. “The clitoral stimulation was something I thought about studying so I had an electronic hand vibration machine purchased. I have yet to use it and I am unsure if it was transferred with the rest of my belongings or...confiscated by my mother, who would not deign to buy one for herself but would enjoy the clitoral stimulative treatments from a doctor.”

He moved closer to her and gently touched her face, turning her face to face him. He did not want to embarrass her, and while he was a worldly man, and he knew she was a woman for whom social mores meant little, even then, some topics might be too sensitive for them to discuss. “You don’t have to say anymore if you choose not to,” he said. “I don’t wish to make you uncomfortable.”

“It’s not that,” she said, looking him in the eye. “I just feel that if I’m to try and replicate the results with...something more than a machine or even my own hands, I would much rather have it be with my own intentions and with my own choice in partners.”

“And just what would those intentions be?” he asked curiously.

“To know if clitoral stimulation is simply a cure for certain female maladies or something...more,” she said. “I think it could be more, but then, I have never...” She trailed off then. “Aside from you, I have never even kissed a man, much less thought of asking one to help me with such experiments.”

“Then perhaps I am the man for you to do those experiments with if you choose,” he murmured, suddenly struck by the idea of having her in his own bed for a night.

“You? You would...with me?” she asked, so shocked she could barely get the words out. He wasn’t the most handsome of fellows, and he was socially awkward in many respects, he realized. And this had been a gaffe of epic proportions, he realized.

“I’m not suitable,” he said. “My apologies.” He let go of her face and turned away.

“Sherlock, no. Wait,” she said, reaching for his hand. “I know this is a marriage of convenience, but...if we were to...take precautions, perhaps?” She gently tugged him back to her. “I just fear you’ll have me and then not...” She trailed off.

“Not want you?” he asked. “Margaret, there is no place you should be other than this place, with me. If having relations would make this more palatable for you, I would do anything. You are my dearest friend and I want you to be happy with this arrangement. I would do much to make you happy.”

“Then I accept,” she said, giving him a small, soft smile the lit up her face.

“And how should we seal this agreement?” he asked.

“With a kiss,” she replied. “As that may be an area I need practice in for scientific results as well.”

“Then we will seal this agreement with a real kiss,” he said. “Just let me guide you.” She nodded and he pulled her close, enjoying the feel of her in his arms, and then bent his head towards hers, capturing her lips in a soft, patient kiss. She was surprised at first but then kissed him back for a moment before wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him more enthusiastically. There could be more practice later, and he had to resist the urge to take it further right there in the study, but at least he was fairly sure that this was a good start for, perhaps, giving this marriage a better chance at succeeding for as long as they wanted it to.

[lets-get-kraken-boys]

Fantasy AU! Dragon Master! Katsuki Bakugou X Witch! Reader: Hot Damn, Dragon Man~!

(Description: I don’t think anyone has written a story like this before with this particular backstory, but if someone has please let me know right away! With that out of the way, this was just a fun little idea I had that I hope you all enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing! Also, I aged up both Bakugou and Kirishima in this story to around their early 20s, though this isn’t really important or relevant to the fic, an adult, hunky Bakugou and Kirishima is a treat I think we should all indulge in~! I might make a Part 2 to continue the story depending on how you all like it, but we’ll see! I hope you enjoy and thank you for your time. // PS: Quirks still exist in my version of the Fantasy AU! //)

~

Fanfiction Lingo

(Y/N) - Your Name

(L/N) - Last Name

(N/N) - Nickname

(H/C) - Hair Color

(E/C) - Eye Color

(F/C) - Favorite Color

~

“Normal speech.”

‘Inner thoughts.’

~

Requester: No One!

Reader Gender: Female (She/Her)

Style of Story: Aiming for a multiparter, but who knows! // Fantasy AU! Hope you’re as excited as I am!

Word Count: 6.4K Words

WARNING(s) / NOTE(s): Aged up characters but this story is NOT NSFW, Quirks still exist, cursing (it’s Bakugou in a fantasy world, he’s going to call you some offensive stuff), and a little bit of blood but no real harm is done to (Y/N)!

~

“Man, I have got to work on my cardio! Ughh…,” you huffed out as you took the last few steps to be on top of the hill you had just hiked up. Stopping for the air you desperately needed, you sat down on the mossy ground below and leaned against a nearby tree, taking deep breaths. As your previously foggy brain became clear again, you noticed the purples and pinks of the dawning sky peaking through the tree’s leaves and smiled, springtime weather had always been your favorite kind. The dewy mornings, sunny afternoons, and clear nights were always a welcome change to the drab winter days. Though, being a Green Witch did make you favor specific seasons more than others.

“Sorry, my lord Hades, but I must admit that I’m a little happy your lovely wife is back with her mother again. Nothing can compare to the plants and herbs that grow back in the Spring. Though, do not fret, my lady Persephone will be back with you sooner than you think.” you spoke to the stillness of the forest, but you felt their presence and knew your gods heard your message.

Looking in your wooden basket, you inventoried the goods you had collected near your secret cove to harvest ingredients. You found the cove three summer’s ago while looking for shelter from a storm that rolled in quicker than expected. You were lost and couldn’t find your way home but the kind nymphs that lived in the area offered you a place to stay that night. In exchange for them sheltering you, you made them a few miscellaneous potions as payment (even though they hadn’t asked for any). Ever since that day, you have been friends with them and are allowed to freely take any of the resources that grow in the area with their permission and in turn you trade them any potions or spells they ask for. Of course you’ve found other places to harvest rarer ingredients for specific creations, but with such a bountiful place so close to your home it is your go-to spot.

“Wicker mushrooms, a bunch of Lavender, Yarrow, Thrumdells, could always use more mint sprigs, Merryquil, Heron’s feathers, I have the mermaid’s bubbles and crystals at home...I think that’ll about do it! Great haul today, (N/N)!” you praised as you set down your basket and stood up. You brushed off your flowy, (F/C) ankle-length skirt and smoothed out your poofy shirt and cloak, straightened the potion holder belt strapped to your hip, picked the basket back up, and continued on the path back to your cottage hidden deep within the forest.

“What should I make for dinner? Zeks enjoys sweet things but I don’t know if Zazel--!” Without warning, a booming roar shook the leaves off the trees, causing you to stumble back in shock. You shot your hand on the dagger strapped to your belt while your eyes darted back and forth through the surrounding terrain, trying to locate where the sound had come from and if there was any immediate danger near you. Shortly after the cry, a loud crash sounded like something smacked the ground hard and caused a tremor that knocked you clean off your feet with a yelp. The shaking lasted for only a moment before everything went still once more as if nothing out of the ordinary had even occurred.

Still in shock from the bizarre situation, you sat on the grass for a little longer, listening to the oddly quiet atmosphere, before another cry shot through the hush of the land and nearly scared you out of your boots. Though, instead of what you thought was ferocity in its tone, it seemed closer to a wail of pain than anything. You stood on shaky legs and took deep breaths while staring into the distance where the noise came from. You wanted to turn around and run to the safety of your home, to go back to the warmth of your cottage and just pretend that this whole instance never happened, but something was pulling you towards the creature. Maybe it was the whines and whimpers that it made, the curiosity caused by something that could make lands quake with the strength of its voice but instantly become like a meek puppy was truly intriguing, but that wasn’t quite it. Maybe you wanted to check if anyone had been hurt by the monstrosity but that didn’t seem right either.

You let out a quiet gasp as one thought in particular struck your mind...could it be...Fate? You cursed yourself, wishing you had brought your tarot cards to check for any possible signs, but you didn’t have time for that right now. You considered your options; be a coward and leave whatever the hell just fell out of the sky alone, abandoning it to most likely die, ignoring the call of Fate, and continuing about your day or appeasing that pesky gut feeling, finding the beast, and seeing what was the matter.

You growled as your legs began to move toward the epicenter of the sound, hating how you can never turn down someone in need of help.

~

~ Timeskip to a short while later ~

~

“Where in the fresh hell is that stupid beast?!” you cursed as you trudged through the spongy moss and bushes covering the forest floor. After running for a bit in the direction you had thought you heard the wail come from you had found no evidence of anything out of the ordinary which pissed you off to no end.

“You couldn’t shut your trap earlier, why are you having such a hard time now?” you mumbled to yourself, pushing past a few bushes in your way. Your next few sassy words became caught in your throat as you heard a low growl erupt a few yards away from you behind the bush directly to the right of you. Suppressing your urge to scream in surprise, you composed yourself and poked your head through the shrubbery, only for your jaw to drop at the sight before you.

An enormous creature was laying on its side in the middle of a small clearing of trees, peacefully sleeping in the early morning sunshine. Its horned head and long neck were stretched out while the rest of its body curled around itself in a cocoon like position. The beast took steady breaths, its lungs filling up and stretching its stomach to show off the breath-taking, fiery red scales that coated its entire body. The tail lay still wrapped around the body and reminded you fondly of a litter of kittens your old master cared for. But probably the most beautiful part of all were the magnificent wings that draped over the serpent’s body like a protective barrier from the outside world. You saw the muscles of the appendages and knew that this creature was not one to be messed with. Right there, such a short distance away, was what you could only describe as a humongous, red dragon!

You couldn’t believe it, you almost wanted to pinch yourself to see if you were really awake but you ignored the feeling in favor of watching the sleeping beast in awe. Sure, everyone around knew that dragons existed and heard the legends about them, but it wasn’t like you got to see them very often. The kingdom to the South was well known for its coexistence with dragons but rarely anyone except those in a higher position of power or people who lived in the tribes actually got to see and interact with them.

Judging by the diagrams you had seen drawn of dragons, you guessed that it wasn’t extremely old based on its size and bodily markings, making it less of a threat. As you examined more it led you to notice the reason for the creature’s moans of pain. A huge gash was carved on the right side of the dragon’s chest, dripping with fresh blood. It was so deep that you could actually see bits of the beast’s rib cage. Wincing at the sight, you inspected further and saw the scales surrounding the wound were a contrasting dark black to the shiny red ones all over the body, almost like they had been scorched by a tremendous flame. Either way, if the serpent did not receive some kind of immediate help with that large of a wound, it would surely bleed out within the next few hours or somehow be injured even more. After contemplating, you sent a quick prayer, took a deep breath, and shuffled your way out of the bushes and into the open for the creature to easily see you.

You expected that such a powerful beast in this state of physical distress would not let its guard down so easily, so when its golden eyes shot open to glare at you with its teeth bared in snarl you were not in the least bit startled. You smiled sweetly at the dragon, lowered yourself closer to the ground, set your things down, and averted your gaze as to not cause it anymore stress or let it think you were challenging it. You kept your hand visible as you reached for the knife on your waist, even as the beast hissed at your movements, and threw it far away from your reach to show respect.

“Hey there! I’m not here to hurt you, I’m here to help,” you spoke loud and clear so it could hear you, but even if it didn’t understand your language you still wanted to get your point across, “I heard you fall awhile ago, that must have hurt, huh? I came to check up on you, see if you were okay, but then I happened to notice that nasty gash in your side and figured you needed my help!” you gulped with the smile still on your face. You heard another growl before it was cut off by a sharp whimper of agony and that noise alone made your heart drop to your stomach. The smile on your face faded into a frown but you quickly perked back up and continued.

“I promise, I just want to check out that wound and get you healed up. Help you get back in the air again. Please, I don’t want to have to leave you to suffer like this.” you finished as you looked back at the dragon with a desperate look in your eye. The dragon wasn’t snarling or glaring at you anymore, which was definitely a good sign, but as you looked deeper in its eyes it was almost like you could feel the pain radiating off of it. After a brief moment of hesitation, the beast lowered its head back down to the ground in defeat, a sign for you to come closer. You gratefully smiled and picked your things back up, got up, and scurried on over.

When you got close enough to where you could press your palm flat to the warm scales and feel its strong heartbeat, you kneeled and examined the bloodied gash. You first ran your fingers along the outskirts of the wound and the dark marks smudged onto your fingertips and palm, confirming that the dragon had been severely burned by something or someone. The actual slash was about five feet long and two feet wide that dug deep into the body, like something had pierced it rather than just nicked it. You looked closer at the blood dripping from the injury and noticed pine needles stuck in the dragon’s flesh, not just on the surface but deep in the wound as well.

You gasped and looked up at the beast who was already gazing down at it with you to ask, “Did you hit a tree during the fall?” The serpent nodded its head with discomfort and flopped it back down onto the soft grass. A pitiful sigh slipped from your mouth as you explained what you were going to do now knowing it could understand you.

“Okay, first off we need to get these pesky pine needles out of the wound. Then, I need to slow the bleeding and somehow dress it. I do have the right ingredients on me to make you a healing cream but I do not know how I can…,” you stopped and glanced at the cloak draped from your shoulders and smiled, “I know! I’ll use my cloak to soak up the blood!” The dragon shot its head up in alarm and looked at you with a gaze of what seemed to be guilt. You tilted your head in confusion before looking at the cloak now in your hand, back to the saddened serpent, and connected the two together with a laugh.

“Oh, are you worried about dirtying this old thing? Pssh, don’t even concern yourself! It's to help you survive, so it's being used for the greater good either way! Between you and me, I was planning on treating myself to a new one anyways, so who cares if a little blood gets on it!” you joked, trying to calm the dragon’s nerves. You washed your hands with the clean water from your canteen strapped to your hip and shook them dry.

“Let’s do this!” you cheered, readying yourself for the crazy afternoon ahead of you.

~

~ Another timeskip to later in the afternoon ~

~

“I must say, you are certainly one of the best patients I’ve ever had, my scaly friend! You’ve been so good letting me take out all those nasty needles and clean away the charcoal and blood from your pretty scales! Thank you for being so sweet.” you praised, scratching the dragon’s chin, behind his horns, and belly as he let out happy grumbles and chitters (Dragon Kiri LOVES belly scritches, and you cannot convince me otherwise) at your kind words. His head was now curled up next to you, watching you clean and disinfect his wound with the utmost care, with him enjoying the pets he got every time you hit a sensitive area or made him hiss from the pain.

You were diligently working at patting away the blood with your now sopping cloak, trying to cease the liquid dripping out of the dragon. As you worked, you made sure to give the creature lots of encouraging strokes and belly rubs to help ease the pain, but whether it was more to help it through this endeavor or to get to pet a living dragon was uncertain. Either way, the job was getting done, and so far no big issues from either party.

Yet.

“Awesome! It looks like the blood flow has slowed down a lot now. Thank the Gods, I don’t know how much more my poor coat could have taken,” you joked while setting the crimson-soaked material to the side, “Now, I’ve got the healing cream prepared for you but how the hell am I going to bandage--AH!” you shrieked as you were suddenly shoved away from the dragon and thrown further back into the field.

You heard the beast let out a concerned roar as your back met the dirt ground with a loud THUD that knocked the wind right out of your lungs. You closed your eyes in pain and gasped, desperate to get the lost air back in your system, but you were stopped as you felt a heavy weight slam on your chest, a hand grab your wrists and pin your arms to the ground above your head, and someone lean over you to block out the sun. Even though your head was spinning with confusion and adrenaline ran a marathon through your veins, your eyes shot open when you felt something sharp press into your neck.

“What the hell are you doing to my dragon, fucking maggot?!” the man on top of you yelled in your face, but you could hardly comprehend his words due to the abruptness of the situation. You wish you could say that you hated him from the moment your eyes landed on him, you wished you could have ignored the way your gut did cartwheels as if the Fate of a lifetime had been completed, but god was everything hard to ignore when he looked so fucking hot. His blonde, spiky hair exploded messily around his chiseled face to give him that ‘I didn’t even try to look good today’ natural beauty. From his striking jawline, cute button nose, strong neck, and those striking crimson eyes, he was just insanely good looking. Even as he glared at you with his eyebrows pulled down in a scowl, you couldn’t help but blush at the intense way he looked at you. Not even mentioning what you could see of his bare torso that was every bodybuilders’ dream, you inferred that he was around the middle of his twenties. His attire was composed of a few pieces of jewelry, colorful arm bands, a blood red cape completed with a fur-lined neck piece, and other things you couldn’t quite see from your position under his knee pressing hard onto your sternum. That pain was actually what brought you back from “(Y/N)’s Hot Guy Dreamland” to realize admiring his looks wasn’t exactly the main issue right now. To be honest, he’d be even more hot if he wasn't pressing that sharp scimitar threateningly to your neck, but sadly even that was sexy.

“I...I...well--,” you stuttered in shock, looking for the right words to spit out to appease the barbarian on top of you.

“EH? Out with it, whelp,” he growled, pressing his knee even harder into your chest to get his point across, “What were you doing to my dragon, dimwit?! Did you try to hurt him?”

“What? No, never!” you defended yourself while weakly struggling to free your arms from his vice grip.

“Did you plan to kill him and skin him for his hide! You sadistic monster!” he roared, pressing the blade closer to your neck, causing your skin to break and bleed. You yelped when you felt the burn of the slice but swore you could smell the scent of burning caramel drifting off of his body that hadn’t been there before.

“I would do no such thing, you creep! I was just--,” you were interrupted yet again by your own whimper as he leaned closer to your face. His frown deepened as you felt the blade press even further into your delicate flesh.

“You know what? I don’t even wanna hear your shitty ass excuses, I might just kill you right now and be done with you,” he smirked as your face significantly paled, “Unless you did something to my partner, then you’re gonna explain what you did, fix it, and then I can take my time slicing--,” the madman was cut off as another voice cut into the conversation.

“Bakugou, stop hurting her!” a masculine voice bellowed from a distance away. The sound of steam expelling filled the tense air as a hot gust of wind swiftly blew over the two of you. Shortly after you felt the man, who you now know his name is ‘Bakugou’, unlatch his grip on your hands and draw his sword away from you neck. You let out a sigh of relief and gawked as he completely abandoned from practically sitting on your chest to sprinting in the direction he had pushed you away from.

“Kirishima!” Bakugou shouted as he ran head first into the warm fog the steam had created. You sat up from the ground and pressed a hand to your neck to stop the light bleeding as deep gasps filled your lungs to contemplate what in the fresh fuck just happened in the time span of maybe a minute. You heard mumbling from the fog and, being the ever curious (N/N), decided to get up on wobbly feet and trek into the steam after the brute of a man.

“This is not how I planned to spend my Wednesday.” you murmured to yourself, walking blindly forward in the mist until you found your assaulter and your lizard patient except...not? No, instead of your new found scaly friend, you saw a red-headed man with horns and scales peppering his body leaning against the bully, Bakugou. His hair was spiked up to incredible heights and it blended seamlessly with his red curly horns hidden within. His face was scrunched up in pain but he still held a brave face as he grinned with teeth that were fit for a dragon. He, too, was around the same age as the blonde, and shirtless with the same body sculpted by the gods themselves, but on the right side of his torso was the same gash your dragon friend had. If the smaller, but still powerful, human sized wings on his back and thick scaly tail weren’t enough to convince you, then the wound confirmed that this indeed was the red dragon from before, now known as Kirishima. And, thankfully, he was nearly fully clothed too.

“Kirishima, don’t be an idiot, de-transform and get some rest, dammit.” Bakugou grunted at the man, causing the spikey haired fellow to laugh.

“Aw, I thought we weren’t partners, Bakugou! Now here you are, caring about some lowly warrior? You flatter me!” Kirishima joked as he coughed into his gloved hand while trying to sit up properly but utterly failing.

“Stupid! Just because I don’t want you to be fucking idiotic and die doesn’t mean we're partners!” he barked, his teeth growing sharper like he himself was a beast. Kirishima chortled and looked over to you. When he noticed your dropped jaw and wide eyes he coughed and looked you in the eye.

“What’s up, dudette? You look like you’ve seen a ghost!” he joked.

“I...what...the HELL?! What even...I don’t understand…,” you paced in circles before looking at the two with (E/C) eyes full of confusion, “Who and what the heck are you two?!” Bakugou looks taken aback so he growls, reaching for his sword again, but Kirishima slaps his hand away from the weapon with a grin.

“I’m so sorry for not introducing myself to you earlier, I was in a lot of pain and plus I didn’t know you that well, so I hope there’s no hard feelings,” he smiled while pointing his thumb to himself, “I’m Eijirou Kirishima! And that is my friend, Katsuki Bakugou!”

“You lizard brain! Don’t just give random strangers our names!” Bakugou bared his teeth but Kirishima chose to ignore him.

“I never caught your name before, what was it?” he asked with a sweet head tilt that reminded you of a concerned puppy.

Suppressing the way your heart clenched at the adorable sight, you stopped nervously pacing and spoke, “My name is (Y/N) (L/N), it’s nice to meet you.”

“Such a manly name! It’s nice to meet you too! Hey, I just wanted to thank you for all the help you provided me today. It’s totally not manly of me to ask for that much assistance, but even I knew that I needed it then more than ever! Who knew the perfect person for the job was just an acre away! Ha!” Kirishima laughed as he struggled to stand but fell back down again onto his tail with a groan of distress.

Bakugou had only barely caught him before you rushed over and kneeled down to check his tender wound. Kirishima flinched and flushed red at your fingers traced along his bare abdomen but you were too worried to care. Bakugou openly glared at the way Kirishima blushed at you, but stopped himself short when he realized what he was doing. Why did he do that? He had only just met you, you were a fucking nobody in his eyes! You hurt his friend! Who you choose touch and don't touch wasn’t his problem! Then again, he glanced at your concerned face and noticed the way your soft features shown in the light, how your (H/C) hair framed you like an elegant oil painting in a museum, how your eyes glistened with the rays of sun, how your lips moved with each word spoken. He blushed at that last thought and shook his head. What the fuck? No, he was too great to be dragged down by silly puppy love! But...you did seem nice and strong too...Wait, no! He looked away from the two of you and tried to compose himself as you and the redhead spoke back and forth.

“Woah! Kirishima, what are you doing? I haven’t finished treating your injury yet! Take it easy on your body.” you scolded like you were his own mother, placing a cloth you had fished out of your pocket onto the leaking wound.

“W-Wait...you’re not done?” he stuttered out, thankful the blush on his cheeks was slowly but surely melting away.

You looked up at him in shock, “You thought I was just gonna leave you like this? No way! You still need that healing cream, stitches, and bandages to cover it up so it won’t get infected!”

Bakugou interrupted Kirishima before he could even protest, “Hold on, you weren’t hurting him?” He looked over to the bloody cloak hastily tossed on the ground and scowled at the memories of his actions a few minutes prior.

“No! That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you, pinhead! I’ve been healing up your dragon while you were off picking flowers in the woods to make friendship crowns! Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to finish treating him so that you two can head on your merry way and go back to wherever you popped out from, got it?” you shot at the brute, causing him to flinch at your harsh words.

“No way am I letting a weakling like you--,” cutting Bakugou off, Kirishima spoke over the next few words Katsuki said, which most likely saved him from a beating by your hands.

“Actually, he doesn’t get a say in this. I would love for you to finish, (Y/N)! Thank you again for great care!” he quickly said, shoving Bakugou a few feet away so he could lay flat on the ground. You balled up the fabric lining the bottom of your foraging basket and placed it under the dragon boy’s head so he could be more comfortable as you got to work again.

You carefully cleaned, sanitized, and tried to get Kirishima back to his peak performance and he took the pain like a champ, but Bakugou on the other hand was getting a little out of hand. He insisted that he keep a close eye on you to make sure you didn’t hurt his “not friend” in any way, shape, or form, and that was fair, but you didn’t like the fact that all he was doing was squatting next to the two of you and just...staring. Not saying anything, just scowling with those pretty eyes of his. What? Just because the man was a bit of a hard ass didn’t mean he wasn’t damn fine eye candy.

“Are you gonna sit there all day and just glare at me and my handy work or are you going to say something, Mr. Negative?” you snarked, watching from your peripheral vision as he jumped at the sudden intrusion of your voice. You smirked as Bakugou scoffed and leaned further in your line of sight to make you acknowledge him.

“Who are you?” he said with a stern tone.

You raised an eyebrow as you added more of the cream onto Kirishima’s wound, “I’ve already told you, my name is--,” Bakugou quickly hushed you.

“Not in that way, moron! I mean as in what are you? Some kind of mage or something dumb like that--,” you swiftly hit Bakugou on the shoulder for his rude remarks but before he could retaliate you flipped the question onto him.

“Don’t call people stuff like that, didn’t your mother ever teach you manners? I’ll tell you what I am after you tell me what you two are.” you countered.

“Bullshit! I’m the one asking the questions here! I ain’t saying--,”

“Bakugou and I are from a Southern Hemispheric tribe called the The Kin Born of Flame,” Kirishima explained as Bakugou’s jaw dropped, “He is actually the son of Chief Mistuki, leader of the Bakugou Clan! How cool is that? As for me I’m half dragon half human, but I’ve started to call my species Dragon Shifters.”

“Wow, not only a dragon but a Dragon Shifter too? This is incredible!” your eyes sparkled as you grinned down at Kirishima in delight.

“I know, right! If you think dragons are rare, try finding more than a dozen Shifters, we’re even harder to come by! Yeah, I’ve been Soul Bonded with Bakugou ever since we were fifteen. He may seem tough on the outside, but once you get to know him he’s really a huge softy!” he laughed as the barbarian cussed him out.

Your heart sank a little as you heard him speak so fondly of the man but the term he used confused you, so you just had to ask, “Soul Bonded? What’s that? Are you two in a romantic relationship?”

“What? Oh, no way! We’re just close buds is all,” Kirishima snickered, “I don’t think I could ever stand to be in a relationship with someone who's so hot headed! But he is still on the market and up for grabs, if you know what I mean~!” Kirishima wiggled his eyebrows at you while you blushed but played it off with a wave of your hand and a teasing giggle.

“What’s that supposed to mean, you hair-for-brains loser?!” Bakugou fumed, his hands twitching at the thought of grabbing the dragon boy’s face and blowing him to bits.

“So, what is Soul Bonding?” you redirected the conversation once again away from the agitated blonde and left him to stew in his frustration.

“Right! Soul Bonding is when a dragon and a human basically become partners, or friends, for life. Bakugou’s people have such a close relationship with my kind that every year a ceremony is held for all the unbonded individuals to try and find their other half. During this process, the human doesn’t get to choose the dragon and the dragon doesn’t get to choose the human, the feeling is sort of hard to describe but you’ll know when you’ve bonded when you see the other and think ‘They’re the only one I can ever fly with again’. Once you’re bonded, you cannot become bonded with another of the opposite species for the rest of your natural life, so if something unfortunate happens to your other half you don’t get a redo. That’s why the practice is so sacred. Some see it as romantic, others see it as a platonic engagement, so Bakugou and I have chosen the latter! Plus, I already have my eyes on a different person~,” Eijirou swooned with a flutter of his scaly wings.

Bakugou groaned, “Please spare us the two hour long declaration of love for another time, idiot. My question still stands, whelp, what are you?”

You huffed, “Well, since you asked so nicely, princess~, I’m a witch,” Kirishima and Bakugou gasped at the answer and glanced at each other nervously, but you raised your hand to stop them from jumping to conclusions, “but if you’re assuming I’m one of the evil witches that only uses black magic and practices necromancy, you’re wrong. I’m actually more of a Green Witch on steroids. I make healing and protection potions, work together with the nymphs who live down by the mountainside, open up my home all the time to the neighboring normal and mythological wildlife, encourage the growth of new, exotic kinds of plants to sprout in my backyard, and more. That is how I was able to make that cream so powerful for you and I, thanks to your guard dog, Kirishima.” you rubbed your neck where the slice had been that had long disappeared from the magical antidote and glared at Bakugou who simply grumbled and looked away in embarrassment.

“Woah, that’s amazing! I was wondering how you made it feel like it wasn’t even hurting anymore! You’re amazing.” Kirishima awed with wonder as he lightly patted the strips of bandages strapped to his side.

“Awe, thank you so much! I’m glad you’re feeling better,” you gave him a scratch behind his horns and his tail began thumping the ground like a dog as you became serious once more and turned to Bakugou, “But I have to ask, what caused Kirishima to get such a huge injury?”

Bakugou froze and let his head dip a bit towards the ground. You looked over at Kirishima who, for the first time, had a truly pissed off glint in his eye. You were taken by surprise at the silence that overcame them and considered taking back the question you had asked but stopped short when Katsuki began to speak again, this time his voice was just a gravely grunt.

“Ever heard of the Dark Kingdom?” was all he had to say as the mood became sinister and heavy.

Your eyes widened and you let out a brief shutter of a sigh as chills swept over your body, “Of course I have. Who hasn’t been affected by them in some way or another?” a grimace filled your now hushed voice. After all, how could you forget the ones who imprisoned your dear instructor?

“Kirishima and I had just made a trade with that damn Prince Shoto in the Todoroki Kingdom to the North last night and we were flying on our normal route back home when all of a sudden this huge blast of blue flames came hurtling towards Kiri. It came out of nowhere, no warning given. I don’t blame Kirishima for not being able to avoid the fucking sneak attack, but I do blame myself for being ignorant enough to not think that an assassin from the Dark Kingdom would try something on our only route home.” Katsuki closed his eyes as his eyebrows furrowed further.

“I should have expected it too, Bakugou. You’re not the only one who wasn’t thinking the smart way.” Kirishima tried to take some of the blame but Bakugou only continued.

“I got a brief glance at the attacker before Kiri fell. While he was falling, he managed to hit a rather large pine tree and instead of breaking it he impaled himself directly on it like a dumbass and further hurt himself. We hit the ground, I checked to see if Kiri was even alive and if I had anything broken, and once I confirmed he was breathing, I ran after the fucker who did this to give him a lesson like a jackass. I ran and ran, but the bastard got away and when I came back to help Kiri I saw you poking and prodding at his flesh and I just...saw red. Look, I’m sorry I jumped your shit and nearly killed you. Just don’t be such a weirdo and don’t go poking your head in business that doesn’t concern a dummy like you!” Bakugou finished while crossing his arms over his chest.

“How did this turn into my fault?” you rhetorically asked the air.

“Well, it’s because--,” Bakugou started.

“Didn’t need an answer on that, dunce,” you rolled your eyes and stood while looking over at Kirishima, “Well, to end this on a happier note, my medical work here is done, boys! You’re all patched up, Kiri!”

“Seriously? Freaking awesome!” he jumped up from the dirt and almost nearly collapsed again if it weren’t for you and Bakugou rushing to help him lean his weight on you two.

“You didn’t let me finish, you overgrown lizard! You’re all patched up, but there is only so much that cream can do. I wanted to say the both of you can come back to my cottage and you can rest up awhile, rehydrate, get some energy back. Plus, I can see about making you a potion that can fully heal that wound for you too!” you finished with a grin.

“Oh yeah? What’s the catch, bitchy witchy? Turning us into frogs to keep as pets?” Bakugou sneered.

You giggled with a smirk, “I haven’t thought of the price yet, but if you’re offering that sounds like fun! I bet you two would be the cutest frogs in the land! Maybe I could as far as cursing you to need a princess to kiss you back to your handsome selves again~!”

The two of them gasped at your cruelty, but you laughed, not noticing the blush on Bakugou’s face, “I’m kidding, guys! You don’t think I’m actually that mean, right?” you teased.

“O-Of course not, (Y/N)! Ha ha! Pleasedon’tturnusintofrogs!” Kirishima stuttered out with a paled face, which made you laugh.

“You worry too much! Let’s get you boys somewhere safe to hang out! Ooo! I have to show you guys everything!” you skipped down the dirt path that ultimately led to your house and you rambled on about your own little world as the two of them shambled close behind, one of them wondering what the hell they just got themselves into getting stuck with a cutie klutz like you and the other way too excited to help these two lovesick fools navigate their way through the world of romance.

~

~ The End ~

~

~ Extra Bonus Ending!!!! ~

~

The figure hidden in the shadows of the trees watched with a smirk as the beautiful young lady led the two idiots further into the forest and away from the clearing where the beast had sadly not bled out.

“Wow, what an interesting turn of events, chiefling,” the blue-eyed figure snickered as they incinerated the bloody cloak of the young maiden previously used to clean the dragon’s wound, “Let’s see how long your princess in shining armor can keep you safe~!”

~

~ To Be Continued… ~

~

[anythingbutmar]

Family meetings (mistake pt.2)

Diego Hargreeves x reader

Summary: After gaining information from Five you realize that the world is ending and you and Diego need a way to save the girls.

A/N: I know I covered a lot of stuff here, and I promise I’ll eventually get to the 60′s but I just think this serves for a multiparter and that’s what I plan on doing, hope you enjoy it!

Warnings: slight plot changes, teensy tiny bit of angst.

The next few days were a bit of a mess, Diego had to do a bunch of police work regarding some shootings and you gladly took the permit that your job gave you when a close relative died. You were in no way close to Reginald, but you still needed to process the fact that Five had appeared from the future rambling about stuff that Diego couldn’t understand.

After their meeting and the funeral he had told you everything he had gathered from it, which wasn’t much. “It was just a lot of nerdy words that you would have understood better than me.” He had said.

And so, now you were determined to know how the hell was he back there and why he seemed so worried all the time, you just needed to figure out what to do with your daughters, which led to where you were right now: knocking on Allison’s door, after trying with Vanya, who lived close to your place but wasn’t there, apparently.

“Hey girl, remember you owe me one from that time I covered you and Luther sneaking to Griddy’s years ago? Right, so I need you to take care of the girls for the day. Luna has some pending homework and Amber needs to take her vitamins at 2:00, okay? Have fun girls! I love you both!”

“Y/N wait, I have to-”

“I won’t take long I promise! Bye!” You yelled from the staircase.

Game on, little Five.

Your years of nightly adventures with Diego had made you quite observant, which helped a lot, since Five didn’t bother on leaving any information of his whereabouts, but you had seen him staring at what seemed to be a glass eye, and there was only one prosthetics factory near, so you gave it a shot and quelle surprise! There he was, yelling at some doctor, sweet as always.

“Oh jeez I’m so sorry! My son was severely damaged from this one time he fell from a tree and he tends to make up stories.” You interrupted, almost laughing at Five’s face. “I thought I had lost you, silly! Now let’s go.” You grabbed him by the ear with your hand heated and started leaving the room. “I apologize for his aggressive behavior! I promise you won’t ever see him again.” You stated before walking out and then poof! He was gone!

“Little shit.” You muttered before running outside where you found him standing calmly with that know-it-all smirk of his, he was rubbing his ear, which brought you huge satisfaction.

“What do you think you’re doing, Y/N?”

“What? Can’t I look after my beloved brother in law?” You batted your eyelashes and he gave you a deadpan look. “Okay, fine. I need you to tell me how you got here and why the hell do you have a fake eye?”

“And why would I do such a thing?” He asked, tapping his chin with irony.

“Because I can understand you! Your siblings may not but science is sort of my thing, I can help you.”

“Well, can you tell me how to stop the apocalypse?” He snapped.

“The what now?”

--

“The what now?” Diego repeated with a confused look.

“The apocalypse, he said we just have a few days to stop it and our only clue is a freaking eye.”

“And meanwhile Luther’s worried about a goddamned monocle.” Diego shook his head, sitting by your side on the bed. “He came by today, you know? To bring the girls and talk about that stupid thing which doesn’t matter at all, because the world’s ending anyways. The worst thing was that he kept mocking me about naming our daughter after the moon, he said it was because I missed him! I didn’t even think of that!”

“Don’t be like that honey, we’ll figure something out, for now I have an idea to make you feel bett-”

“Mommy?” Luna opened the door, rubbing her eyes. “I had a nightmare.”

“It’s ok baby, let’s go tuck you in ok?” You were about to stand before she gave you puppy eyes.

“Can I sleep with you? Just for tonight, pleaaaaase!” You looked at Diego and instantly knew. He could never resist his older daughter’s puppy eyes.

“Alright, come here, what was it about anyways?” You asked as she climbed on the bed, laying between you two.

“I can’t remember well, I think there was a big boom and suddenly everyone was gone! The whole planet was gone!” She made a gesture with her tiny hands and you shared a wide eyed look with Diego. So far, Luna hadn’t shown any signs of an ability, but how could she know about something that hadn’t happened yet?

You refilled your glass of water with your power before taking a large sip and passing it to your husband, who was caressing your daughter’s sleeping face in shock.

“Are you think-”

“Mommy? Luna scared me.” Amber entered your room and without even asking climbed on your bed and laid on Diego’s chest, immediately closing her eyes at the feeling of her dad’s heartbeat.

“I guess it’s sleepover night then.” He chuckled.

--

Next morning Diego gave you all a kiss on the forehead and left you a note saying he had to work early because there was another shooting at the mall, leaving you to have an all girls morning, which excited you to no end. You loved Diego more than you could ever possibly say, but you also loved having your own time with the kids, who loved it just as much.

You turned the radio on and started preparing pancakes for the three of you, flinching slightly in disgust at the thought of Diego’s favorite breakfast: a raw egg. You never understood him avoiding the possibility of a warm tasty meal, in reality, you never agreed much in terms of habits. For example, you enjoyed drinking sometimes, as you had discovered during that fateful night when you were younger, but he wasn’t bothered by it, and neither were you about his healthy way of living, at least most of the time.

And so, you were having a peaceful breakfast, occasionally laughing at Amber’s syrup stained cheeks, when Klaus knocked on the door looking... much like Klaus.

“Hey Y/N/N! Isn’t it hilarious that you married Diego but somehow we both ended up being Five’s hypothetical parents in the eyes of a corrupt doctor?!” He laughed, entering your place and admiring the decorations. “Anyways, hello there my girlies! It’s time for a family meeting!” He sang, making them laugh.

“A family meeting?” You asked, picking up the plates.

“Urgent matter, according to Luther, could be about his newfound muscle for all I care about, but he wants us all there so let’s go baby!” He whispered so his nieces wouldn’t hear him.

“Alright, just let me get ready.”

--

You arrived at the house and left the girls with Pogo, who started showing them around the greatest places, according to him, and entered the living room with Klaus.

“You’re a bit late, babe.” Diego simply stated gesturing towards everyone’s bored faces.

“Oh, Y/N “just had to get ready.”“ Klaus mocked you, already pouring himself a drink.

“Yeah well, time runs differently when you have kids, buddy.” You said, receiving a glass yourself.

“It so does.” Allison clinked her glass against yours smiling.

After that, Luther showed you a video of Grace and Reginald at the moment of his death, which was followed by a discussion about her state in which you obviously refused to turn her off, she was the closest thing you had to a mother and you would not give up on her, specially knowing how much she meant to Diego and how much Luna and Amber had loved her.

You chose to wait for Five and Diego left to talk to Grace. You were going to follow him but you realized that it was a private matter, and stayed with Vanya, who was the only one left.

“Want one?” You offered and she politely declined. “Alright then, who’s this Leonard?”

“I’m gonna kill Allison.” She turned red and covered her face with her hands.

“Come on Vanya! I might not be your sister but we had our time together too! And besides, I’m a great listener.” You smiled patting the couch, and she finally nodded and sat down. Truthfully, it didn’t take that much to convince Vanya to do something, just a few kind words, which mostly everyone lacked towards her.

And so, the evening went by with both of you laughing at her new crush and remembering past times. You and Vanya had spent many hours together on the academy because for some time she and Grace were tasked with training you because Reginald was too busy with the others, who were on a much more advanced level than you, and so, she kept you running around the staircases and growing plants in the garden. According to Reginald, you could use them as weapons, but you two just thought they were pretty.

In the end the old man was right, you were going to need those damned plants to defend yourself.

After hearing gunshots you saw as the love your life fell right on the couch where you and Vanya had been sitting on.

“Get down!” He whispered and you obeyed, taking Vanya with you. “The girls Y/N, where are they?”

“They’re in Pogo’s room. How many of them?” You asked back, putting your arm around Vanya in a protective matter.

“Just two.”

And right as he said so they entered the room shooting all around until Luther and Allison started fighting them. You stood and saw a large man and a smaller armed woman. Diego and Allison got busy with the guy and you hurried Vanya to a safe corner.

“Stay here!” You told her before running towards the others. They were arguing, for a change and then the couple started shooting again. Diego and Allison ran towards a different direction and you stayed as you noticed the man was now reaching towards Vanya.

“I don’t think so, big man.” You broke the window with a tree branch from the backyard and snatched his weapon with it before kicking him on the stomach, which was completely useless, the guy was huge.

Luckily, Luther appeared which allowed you to go get Vanya. You were about to run with her towards Pogo’s room but you heard screaming, and you looked just as a giant chandelier was about to fall on Luther. You tried to push it with wind but you weren’t fast enough.

Thanks to his strength he was able to lift himself up, revealing his inhumanly hairy chest and arms, a secret well hidden until that moment. Allison tried consoling him but he ran from her. It didn’t matter, you didn’t have time for that.

“I’ll go get them, don’t worry, you go check up on your mom and we’ll meet back home, ok?” You grabbed Diego’s shoulders and he silently nodded, running upstairs.

After making sure there were no scratches on them, you explained what had happened, to which they stopped crying because they both loved a good superhero story. You took both their hands and went home, happy to be in a safe place but with a terrible feeling in your gut, as if you had forgotten something.

You waited up for Diego, who arrived an hour later looking destroyed. “I had to d-do it, s-s-she was already g-gone.” And you understood perfectly, so you cuddled him all night, even though neither of you could sleep. Those guys were still out there, Grace was dead, Five was nowhere to be found and you still felt like something was missing.

Or someone.

“Klaus!” You exclaimed, startling your tired husband.

(Part one here)

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@ alexander-hamilhoe

[miguel-manbemel]

Aspects & Fanfics Ep. 45: Beware the Paladin Part 5: The Royal Family Grows

This episode serves as an ending to the multipart story Beware the Paladin. I hope that you all have been enjoying the story so far and the ending is not disappointing to your expectations. The next story I’ll be working on will be a story out of the main narrative, a Halloween one-off special that I hope you all enjoy. So I’ll see you next time in a little less than two weeks, on Halloween. Until next time!

SYNOPSIS: Roman is scared of the fact that he’s going to have a baby, both for what he’s about to go through and because he’s going through it without Virgil by his side. Chris tries to convince Virgil to forget his differences with Roman and be with Roman when the moment comes, but Virgil shows himself reluctant and it’s improbable that Chris will manage to convince him on time before the new baby is born.

WARNINGS: Depicts a pregnancy and delivery. Implied sexual innuendo, very slight.

EPISODE INDEX

[Chris is looking right at the camera in shock]

CHRIS: I… I’m sorry I’m staring at you, guys, gals and non binary pals. I’m just… how do I say it… in shock, I guess? I mean, I shouldn’t be. After all I’m here which means that this could happen again at any time, but still… I’m rambling. I guess it will be better if I tell you what happened so that you understand why I’m… why we’re all like this. You see, Patton returned safely from the Core and thanks to a new ability that the Core gave him, now he can heal injures from the other Sides. With that new power, he cured Janus’ head injury and woke him up. With everybody ready, we all entered in autopilot and Talyn hypnotized Thomas and Joan to resynchronize Thomas’ brainwaves and restore his contact with us. That went fine… but in the meantime, my parents, Roman and Virgil, tried to fix their relationship, very damaged after the Paladin’s words. They seemed to have talked it all out and decided to give a chance to their relationship again. But then, after some time they spent in their bedroom in autopilot, suddenly they started arguing and Virgil claimed that the Paladin had taken control of Roman again, for a short time, to tell Virgil that Roman blamed him for my leg injury, and that Roman thought that Virgil was bad for my development. That was the last straw for Virgil and he decided to leave Roman’s room and return to his own room, to put his ideas in order and decide if he wanted to break up with my father definitely or not. He’s now there at this very moment… but the time they spent in the bedroom seems to have had consequences for my father… He just said… I still don’t believe what he said… excuse me, I’m gonna ask him again. Roll title screen, please.

[intro sequence]

CHRIS: I’m sorry, father… I think… I think I didn’t hear you right. Did you just say…?

ROMAN: Have you ever imagined having a brother. Yes, I just said that Chris. I think… I think I’m having a baby.

THOMAS: Gosh, Sides’ biology is so confusing… So one time Virgil gets pregnant and the next time the one who gets pregnant is you? How’s that possible?

ROMAN: Don’t ask me, Thomas. Just like you, I’m not in control of my inner organs. Yes, this time it’s me who’s got pregnant and we did nothing different from the last time, but that’s how it goes, I guess. It seems in a relationship between Sides, who’s gonna deliver the baby is just chosen randomly. This was so unexpected. We both had decided not to have any more children, and now…

LOGAN: Roman…

ROMAN: I know what you’re gonna say, that if we didn’t want more children, we should have taken protection, and that we’ve been a bunch of senseless fools. And you’re right, we should have taken protection, but we didn’t. After two weeks apart, we had just reconciled… so, we both got overwhelmed by our feelings, so repressed for so many days. They blurred our reason and… it just happened naturally. We didn’t even think about anything else other than being together sharing our mutual true love after so long. And this is the result. Born from our love, a new Side is about to join the fam.

CHRIS: Wow… I can’t believe this… I’m… I’m gonna be a big brother? [starts crying] Why am I getting so emotional all of a sudden? I know I’m Thomas’ sensitivity but how can I get so sensitive over someone I don’t even know?

PATTON: Well, kiddo, a new kid joining the family should always be a motive of rejoice, and becoming a big brother is no less emotional.

ROMAN: But this was so unexpected.

REMUS: Well, if you do it without protection, what did you expect? Did you think that a stork would deliver the baby at your door or something, like Patton believed before Logan taught him otherwise with practical lessons?

[Remus wiggles his eyebrows at Logan, who blushes and gives Remus a silent dirty look]

ROMAN: Ugh… My royal suit is starting to get too tight. Like it happened to Virgil, this is going fast, so fast I barely even have time to react about it, and my body is changing by the minute… I feel like a bag of popcorn in the microwave. And I didn’t want to deliver any kids… I’m so scared…

THOMAS: Are you saying that you don’t want to…?

ROMAN: No, I didn’t say that. I’m scared to death of what I’m about to go through… but at the same time… I don’t know… it’s a strange feeling of joy and happiness. Just like when you were born, Chris. And, same as you, I don’t even know him – because we already know it’s gonna be a him as all of us, Thomas’ Sides, share with him the same gender, age and sexuality – I don’t even know him yet, but I can’t wait to have him in my arms. I’m frightened of what comes immediately before but I can’t wait for what comes next. I do want to have him. I desperately want to have him now. I haven’t seen his face… and I already love him with all my heart. I know it’s sappy… but I can’t express it with other words.

PATTON: You’re not sappy, Roman. This is something that only those who have experienced parenthood can really understand. If there’s a form of true love at first sight, I think this is the purest form of this kind of love, a parent meeting their kid for the first time. Even before, like you said, that love is already present and strong. It happened the same to me when I had Virgil. I just looked at his tiny little face once, and I immediately knew giving him love and protecting him from all harm would be the center and purpose of my life forever. Not even the Dark Master deleting my memories could erase the love I’ve always felt for Virgil. From the moment I saw him years later, all grown up, even when I didn’t remember he was my son, I loved him with the same strength I had loved him as a baby, if not stronger.

CHRIS: Speaking about Virgil… Father, you do realize that we need to tell him about this, right?

ROMAN: I know, but I don’t want to disturb him. He wants to be alone, he made it very clear.

CHRIS: But this changes everything, father. This is important for him. He has the right to know he’s about to be a father again. Besides, his complaints come from you hiding things from him. I don’t think hiding this important event from him and denying him the chance of being present on his second son’s birth is the best way to solve your issues. It would make them even worse if possible.

PATTON: Chris is right, Roman. Wow, Chris, you have matured so fast. Now you speak like a proper adult man and I’m proud of you, kiddo.

CHRIS: [smirks] I love the contradiction of you considering me an adult man and ending the phrase with “kiddo”. It’s such a lovely trait on your part, grandpa. Thank you. [to Roman, serious again] Well, father. What do you say?

ROMAN: [beat, then he sighs] I think you’re right, Chris. Virgil needs to know and we must tell him… But I wouldn’t dare to enter his room now… I’m scared of making everything worse if I do.

CHRIS: You don’t have to tell him yourself, father. If you want me to, I can go see him in your place.

ROMAN: Ow! This suit is too tight, I can barely breathe… [summons an XL-sized version of the suit, wide enough to conceal his growing belly] There… that’s much better. It’s so weird… As I said I can already feel something moving inside of me… well, not something, someone. [puts his hands on his belly] It’s so weird, but so wholesome at the same time…

CHRIS: The pregnancy is going fast, so I can’t waste more time. I shall go to dad’s room. He should be here with you when the delivery comes.

ROMAN: Please, don’t mention the word “delivery”… I’m so scared of it, and it’s just around the corner… The Dragon Witch is just a roasted chicken compared to this battle I’ve got ahead… I seriously admire human women who can go through this, even worse than me, and stay strong… Now, Chris, are you sure you want to do this? Maybe I should swallow my fear and go tell him myself. I’m a prince and I should be brave enough to talk to my husband about this.

CHRIS: No, father. I do think that facing your fear and telling him yourself would be the right thing to do under normal circumstances. I would support you and it would make me proud that you would do that. However, in your state, it will be better that you stay here, not traveling between rooms and putting yourself in a situation of stress, cause you’ve settled down on having him and you don’t want a miscarriage, do you? If that thing is possible for us, Sides, I don’t know… Just in case, wait here, okay? I’ll go speak to him.

ROMAN: Okay… I’m so proud of you, my boy. Please, tell Virgil that I love him… [suddenly sad] No, it will be better if you don’t tell him that, I don’t want him to feel pushed.

CHRIS: [putting his hand on Roman’s cheek] He knows you love him, father, and you know that he loves you back. I’m sure everything will be fixed eventually, don’t worry. [to the others] Please, guys, take care of him while I’m gone, okay?

PATTON: Don’t worry about anything, kiddo, we’ll take care of Roman.

[Chris nods, smiling, then smiles one last time at Roman and sinks down. Then he rises up in Virgil’s room. The room is all dusty, more than what was usual for Virgil’s room, the signal of not having been inhabited for a long time]

CHRIS: Well, it seems dad didn’t have time to tidy this room yet… Dad! Dad, are you here? I know you asked me not to come, but something’s happened! Something that needs your immediate attention! Dad!

[Virgil goes down the stairs]

VIRGIL: Chris, what are you doing here? I thought I told you that I wanted to be alone.

CHRIS: I know, dad, but this is an emergency. I need you to come with me to the living room.

VIRGIL: To the living room? What for? Did something happen to Thomas?

CHRIS: No, not to Thomas. This is something about father.

VIRGIL: About Roman? What, did he turn into the Paladin again? Maybe something went wrong with the hypnosis or something? I hope it’s an emergency of that kind, because I’m not interested in anything else related to your father, not for the time being.

CHRIS: It’s not that… but listen…

VIRGIL: Chris, I understand that you love us both and I appreciate that you try to mediate between us. But you can’t just meddle into this issue like this. You could cause more harm than good.

CHRIS: Dad, listen…

VIRGIL: I don’t want to see Roman right now. So you can tell him that I’m not interested in anything that he…

CHRIS: [interrupting him, yelling] You’re gonna be a father again!

[Virgil looks at Chris, stunned and speechless]

CHRIS: Yes, that’s what I came here to tell you. Father has gotten pregnant of you and you both are about to give me a little brother.

VIRGIL: A… a new son? But… but how? I thought that I was the one that…

CHRIS: So did we, but it seems we were all wrong. Father’s pregnancy has already started and you know how fast this goes. He will be delivering soon, and he would love you to be there when the time comes to support him.

VIRGIL: But… I’m not ready to face him yet.

CHRIS: Dad, please. Can’t you push aside your differences just for a couple of hours? He needs you now, he’s so scared. You should know better since you’ve also delivered a child, me. I don’t remember, of course, but I bet you’ll never forget how you felt before that. That’s how Roman is feeling right now. Please, dad, I beg you. Come with me.

VIRGIL: [anxious] I… I can’t… I can’t! This is like some sort of emotional blackmail, is it not? He sent you as his tool to make me feel like trash and push me into coming back! Well, if he thinks he’s gonna manipulate me into coming back to him just because…

CHRIS: [angry yelling, interrupting Virgil] Are you listening to yourself!? It’s Roman we’re talking about, not the Dark Master, for f… [bleep] sake! Father didn’t want to tell you at first, because he didn’t want to disturb you in your retirement! It was me who thought that you had the right to know the news! He was so afraid to tell you in person he wouldn’t dare to bother you! Heck, he was afraid of even asking me to tell you that he loves you, so don’t you f… [bleep] dare to say he would…!

[Chris stops mid sentence, trying to calm himself down, while Virgil doesn’t say a word. Then Chris sighs and speaks with a calmer voice that can’t conceal the disappointment]

CHRIS: I’m sorry… You’re still my dad and I should speak to you with respect… Well, now you know the news, and you are free to do with this information whatever you consider. But if you want my humble opinion… Father was there supporting you when you delivered me. Now, he’s going through those exact same feelings of terror, insecurity and pain you went through back then, and I think it would be fair that you were there supporting him, at least while it happens, just like he was there supporting you when you went through that. Then, you both are free to stay separated, to divorce, or to do whatever the heck you want to do with your lives as free adult Sides, but now Roman needs you. If you don’t want to be there as a husband, at least be there as a friend to comfort him, and be there also as the father of the creature that’s coming to this world, who also has the right to enjoy your presence. That’s all I have to say, dad, and I won’t force you to do anything. I’m going back to father, because if you don’t wanna be there, I’ll try to fill your place and support him. But you and I know very well it won’t be the same for him. Bye, dad.

[Chris looks at Virgil one last time with eyes of huge disappointment, then sinks down. Virgil looks at the empty spot, still speechless after his son’s speech. Then, Chris rises up in the living room. Roman’s belly is already huge]

ROMAN: Well… How did it go?

CHRIS: I gave him the news. He said he’s not ready to face you yet… among other things I’ll better keep for myself.

ROMAN: [sad] I see… Well, thanks for trying, son.

CHRIS: Don’t worry, father. If he doesn’t want to be with you, I will be with you. You’re not alone, okay?

[Roman smiles sadly at Chris]

ROMAN: Thank you, son. I love you so much.

THOMAS: And we’re all here for you too, Roman. You are not alone by any means.

ROMAN: I know, guys, and I thank you all… It’s just… that this isn’t gonna be the same without Virgil. And I don’t mean only this happening right now. My life as a whole is not gonna be the same without Virgil by my side. I thought we were gonna grow old together, and now…

[Roman can’t help a little sob. Chris hugs Roman]

CHRIS: It’s okay, father. It’s okay. Things will get better and you’ll feel better in time, you’ll see.

ROMAN: [in pain] Aw, it hurts! Aw!

CHRIS: [startled, suddenly releasing Roman from his hug] What!? Did I hurt you on the belly with my hug!? I’m sorry!

ROMAN: No, Chris, it’s not the hug, it’s…! Aw! [puts his hand on his belly as if he was in a terrible pain]

LOGAN: The baby is coming!

CHRIS: Already!? Oh, my gosh!

TALYN: Wow, I came here to perform a session of hypnosis, I didn’t expect to witness a birth.

JOAN: Me neither, but that’s what you get when you hung up with the Sanders Sides, I guess. Every day is an adventure.

[Roman summons a hospital gown around him]

ROMAN: I hope you don’t mind if I summon my own gown, Logan. Nobody needs to see my posterior, you know? I mean, they would be wowed by it’s beauty, but that’s a view I reserve only for… [suddenly sad again] …well, you know who… [in pain, yelling] Ugh! Get me to the couch or I’ll drop the baby right on the floor!

[Logan and Janus help Roman lie down on the couch. Chris holds Roman’s hand]

CHRIS: I’m here with you, all the way through.

ROMAN: Thanks, Chris, I…

[suddenly Virgil rises up. Everybody looks at him]

ROMAN: [surprised and a little afraid] Vi… Virgil…

VIRGIL: [shy voice, looking away] Are… are you okay, Roman?

CHRIS: [slightly reproachful] You took your time, dad. You almost didn’t make it.

VIRGIL: I… I’m sorry, guys… I was afraid that you all would be mad at me after what I said… If you want me to leave, I’ll understand.

THOMAS: No, don’t leave! You don’t need to be afraid of us, Virgil. We’re your friends and family. We don’t hate you and we’re not mad at you.

VIRGIL: There’s more, though… [to Roman] Roman, I… I was afraid to show up here and be rejected by you… just like I rejected you earlier. I guess this all comes down to my fear of rejection. After the Paladin said these words through your lips… I feared that you would eventually reject me and… I rejected you before you had the chance of doing it first. I guess you were right from the start. I… I’m a paranoid after all. [ironic titter] Even now, I’m imagining that everyone in this room is against me, somehow…

PATTON: We’re not, Virgil. Like Thomas said, we love you.

ROMAN: Virgil… You’re my reason to live. How could I reject you? And you’re not a paranoid… not any more than anyone of us and certainly not any more than me. We all fear rejection. Just a moment ago, I was afraid of being rejected by you, that’s why Chris stepped in to tell you what’s going on with me. But I love you… I always loved you and I think I forever will. If you only gave me the chance, I’d show you that I wouldn’t let you down, and that I would never, ever reject you. I promise.

VIRGIL: Roman, I…

ROMAN: And please, whatever you decide, I beg you, don’t listen to the words I said as the Paladin. He’s only a part of me that I can’t control, who always puts in my mouth things out of context in twisted ways, trying to put you away from me. That’s not me. I swear that’s not me and I don’t think the things he says.

JANUS: Virgil, you asked me the other day if the Paladin was saying the truth, and I detected he was. But now I’m telling you that Roman is saying the truth too, which means either that the Paladin is such a good liar that he can fool even me, or the most probable, that he’s so insane that he believes his own lies, which makes him undetectable by me, because for him, it’s the truth. You can trust Roman in this.

ROMAN: With Thomas’ treatment, I hope the Paladin will stay locked up inside of me and never come back out again. But if he ever tries, know that I will fight him with all my strength, to defend you from him and his poisonous words so that he never harms you again. I’ll protect you with my life from him if need be. By my royal crown, I swear I won’t let him break my family again if you give me the chance to put my family back together again! Please, Virgil!

VIRGIL: [tearing up] I’m sorry, Roman. I should have trusted you better and not let my fears overwhelm me. I still love you and I never wanted to leave you, because you too are my reason to live, Roman, and I think I’d be miserable… no, I already was miserable without you.

[Roman gives an emotional smile to Virgil]

ROMAN: You’re making me the happiest creature on existence with these words, Virgil. I love you, so… so… much… [suddenly in pain] Ugh! But I guess I’ll have to show you my love later, because there’s a little baby that can’t wait to be ejected out of mi body! Aw!

VIRGIL: [rushing towards Roman] Keep calm, Roman. [to Chris, who is still holding Roman’s hand] Can I…?

[Chris steps aside, smiling fondly at Virgil]

CHRIS: Of course, dad. His hand has always been yours to hold. It’s a shame that the couch is next to the wall, or else I would have placed myself on the other side to hold his other hand. Of course, I could always stretch my arm, but…

ROMAN: [in pain, but smiling nevertheless] Nnghh! You’re holding it in spirit, my son, don’t worry. Besides, I don’t want Thomas to get sick again because of the stretchy arms…

THOMAS: Thanks for noticing me…

LOGAN: Okay, you already know how this goes, Roman. The baby has taken the form of gas that is circulating inside your body, looking for the way out. When it reaches the exit, the pain will disappear, but until then, you need to push when I tell you, okay?

ROMAN: Okay…

LOGAN: And I hope you don’t fart on my face, like Virgil did…

VIRGIL: [titters] Yeah, me too… Sorry about that, Logan…

LOGAN: It’s all right, Virgil. Okay, Roman. Ready? Push!

[Roman starts pushing. His struggling face is full of sweat]

VIRGIL: Come on, Roman. You’re the strongest man I know, much stronger than me. If I could do it, so you can.

LOGAN: Okay, one more try. Push with all your might… now!

ROMAN: [struggling] Ngggghhhhhh! I’m never doing it again without protection! Nnnngggghhhhh!

LOGAN: Come on, Roman, I thought you were a warrior! I’m sure you can do better. Push again! Push as if you were figuratively fighting the Dragon Witch and sticking your sword inside her tummy! Push, now!

ROMAN: [now with tears in his eyes, his face is all red out of the struggle, yelling] GGGAAAAAHHHHH!!!!

[crimson smoke starts coming out of Roman’s body. While it forms a cloud, Roman’s belly shrinks back to its normal flat form, until all the smoke is out of him]

ROMAN: [concerned, and relieved from the pain at the same time] Cri… crimson?

LOGAN: That’s another possible combination of red and purple, this time with red dominating.

VIRGIL: Yes, but what do you think it means that his color is crimson? I mean, the only one we’ve seen crimson is… you know…

LOGAN: …the Paladin, I know, yes, but don’t worry. I don’t think this baby will be related in any way with the Paladin. This has to be a coincidence, that’s all.

VIRGIL: Okay, if you say so…

[the crimson cloud descends upon Roman’s arms and a baby materializes. Oddly enough, he doesn’t cry, he just stares at Roman with a cute face of curiosity and determination]

ROMAN: Oh, my gosh… I…

VIRGIL: He’s just as brave and determined as his father. Look, he’s so strong-willed he doesn’t even cry.

[the baby lets go a cute little giggle and puts his little hand on Roman’s cheek, trying to grab it. Roman is the one who immediately starts crying. After him, both Virgil and Chris giggle and cry at the same time]

TALYN: Oh, my gosh, he’s just so cuuute… Look at his little hands, Joan…

JOAN: I’m getting a little emotional, and I didn’t expect to end the day this way, at all.

THOMAS: Well, welcome to my world once again, Joan. [to Virgil and Roman] I’m so happy for you two, guys.

REMUS: I’m Uncle Remus for the second time. How proud can an uncle be?

PATTON: My, I have two grandsons now. I’ve got a huge family of kiddos to spoil now, I’m so happy!

IAN: Congratulations, guys. After all you’ve been through, I’m happy that at least you have a moment of happiness to compensate, even if just a little bit, the distress you’ve been suffering lately.

JANUS: I’m not glad at all that I could wake up on time to witness this. I’m an uncle-in-law again, who would have thought?

ROMAN: Thank you guys, all of you.

LOGAN: Well, congratulations, family. How are you going to name him?

ROMAN: I’m too tired right now to think of a name, Virgil. Have you got any ideas?

VIRGIL: Well, if it was a girl, I would have chosen Hope.

ROMAN: Hope? Why?

VIRGIL: Because that’s what his little giggle inspired me. It calmed my anxiousness, and gave me hope for the future. Could it be that he’s the Side of Thomas in charge of his hope?

THOMAS: It would be beautiful if it was so. How can we know for certain, Logan?

LOGAN: Unfortunately, without my checking ability, I can’t examine the baby to see what Side of Thomas he exactly is. Patton already tried to restore my power with his new healing ability but it didn’t work, unfortunately. We’ll have to wait until the baby grows to find out.

PATTON: I’m sorry I couldn’t do more, Logan, but your ability is out of reach for me to heal it, it seems. Or maybe it’s not a matter of lack of health on your part and it’s something else, I don’t know. In any case, I’m sorry I couldn’t help you more.

LOGAN: You don’t have to apologize for anything, Patton, it’s not your fault, and I’ll be fine. But returning to the subject about the baby’s name, if I may be of help, I have an idea for a male name that means “hope.”

VIRGIL: Really? What is it.

LOGAN: And it’s only appropriate, due to Thomas’ Irish heritage, that the boy’s name would be of Irish origin. Do you like the name Dillon? It means “ray of hope” in Irish.

VIRGIL: Dillon? Ray of hope? [heartwarming smile] That’s exactly what I felt, a ray of hope straight to my heart. I love it… What do you think, Roman?

ROMAN: I love it too. Thank you so much, Logan.

VIRGIL: Then Dillon it will be. Dillon Benjamin Sanders.

ROMAN: Why Benjamin?

VIRGIL: It is after Ben Platt. You named our first son Christian Gerard after Gerard Way knowing how much I love My Chemical Romance. It was only fair that I in turn named our second son Dillon Benjamin after one of your favorite musical actors.

ROMAN: Thank you. I love you, Virgil. And I love you too, my dear Dillon Benjamin Sanders.

[everybody in the room starts looking at the baby with smiles of happiness. Time goes by and it’s nighttime. Everybody has left the living room except the family, Thomas and Joan. Roman his holding the baby, giving him his first bottle of milk, while Thomas and Joan are in the kitchen making dinner]

ROMAN: [holding the bottle while the baby drinks] I want to treasure these moments for as long as they last, as I know that, in any moment, Dillon will start growing up at light speed, like you did, Chris. I want to enjoy Dillon’s infancy, as I know it’s gonna be short, really short. This is his first bottle of milk, but it will also probably be his last.

CHRIS: I’m sorry I couldn’t give you more time. Before you had the time to get used to the idea of having me, I was already an adult. It’s not fair, is it?

VIRGIL: It is not, certainly. I would have loved to live the experience of seeing you growing up day by day, year by year, teaching you all I know, doing my best to make you a good Side, making sure that I could set you ready to the world of adulthood. Like any parent, I guess. But one moment you were in the cradle, and the next moment you were practicing archery and sword fencing. And I don't remember anything in-between, if there even was anything in-between.

CHRIS: I would have loved to live that experience too, dad. But don’t you worry. If I may speak, you have already done your best to make me a good Side, even if sometimes I made it difficult.

VIRGIL: Thank you, son. I really appreciate your words. But you haven’t been much difficult. If anything, I was the one making things difficult for both of us sometimes.

CHRIS: Dad… father… I really hate saying this right after all that has happened, but I have to be honest to you and to myself.

ROMAN: What is it, son? Is something wrong?

CHRIS: Wrong? No… not really… I think… Dad… Father… Would you be very disappointed if… if I left your room to live independently in my own room?

[Virgil and Roman look at Chris, not saying a word]

CHRIS: [nervous, slight stutter, moving his hands nervously] It… It doesn’t have to be just now. I wouldn’t leave until I made sure that father was totally fine and you didn’t need me… but I need to experience life and build a room of my own in the Mind Palace. Like I said, it’s not fair that I grew up so fast that you couldn’t spend more time raising me up… but that doesn’t change the fact that I grew up and I’m an adult and…

VIRGIL: [putting his hand on Chris’ hands to stop him from moving them compulsively] Chris…

CHRIS: Yes, dad?

VIRGIL: You don’t need to try so hard to convince us. We are your parents, and we love you. Besides, we knew this day had to come one day or another. It’s a law of life that the son leaves the nest to build a new nest of his own. It would be criminal if we opposed to that and you are not a property of us that we should keep in a jar unable to experience life on their own. We understand and we don’t have any objections. Just remember that we’ll always be here for you, for whatever you may need us, okay?

[Chris gives an emotional smile to Virgil]

CHRIS: Of course, dad… Of course.

ROMAN: Virgil speaks for both of us, Chris. I will only add that we’re very, very proud of you, and we know that you’re ready to make us proud no matter where you go. Chase your dreams, Chris. Life is too short to do anything else.

CHRIS: Thank you, father… [tears fall down his cheeks] Gosh… Why am I crying? It’s not like I’m leaving to the end of the world, my room will be in the same Mind Palace as yours, dag nabbit! I know I said I’m an adult, and I know I’m gonna be super sappy, but… dad… could you hug me like you briefly did when I was a baby… one last time, so that at least I have a memory of how it feels like?

VIRGIL: [also in tears] Come here, my boy.

[Virgil hugs Chris tightly, and they both sob]

[end card]

THOMAS: Okay, dinner’s rea… what’s going on, guys?

ROMAN: It’s nothing, just some family bonding before our boy spreads his wings and becomes an independent man. He’s moving away to build his own room.

THOMAS: Oh?

CHRIS: Not today, father. As I said, I’m not leaving until I make sure you are okay. Besides, I want to spend some time with my brother before I go.

ROMAN: [suddenly struggling, but not losing the smile] Well, now that you say so, I could use some help with your brother right now, because his weight is starting to crush me. Help me, please!

[Chris quickly grabs Dillon. He has already grown to five year old size, he sits him down on the couch]

DILLON: Sorry.

JOAN: Heh… It’s funny. A human’s first word is usually mama or papa, and his first word has been “sorry”.

CHRIS: Well, my first word was “pizza”, so…

VIRGIL: You do remember?

CHRIS: It’s my oldest memory. Me in the cradle begging for pizza.

DILLON: Ew! Pizza! Gross!

CHRIS: What? What do you mean you don’t like pizza? It’s the best food in the world!

DILLON: Then you can keep it all for yourself! I don’t like that kind of food. I prefer veggies, like eggplant, zucchini, Brussels sprouts, broccoli, and above all else…

CHRIS: Don’t…

DILLON: …carrots.

EVERYBODY IN THE ROOM EXCEPT JOAN: Eeeeewwwww!

DILLON: What? They’re delicious, and a good source of vitamins A and D, which is good for the eyes and the skin! You’ll envy me when I have golden skin in the summer and you stay all pail!

JOAN: Well, Thomas, it seems there’s a part of you that, deep inside, loves carrots. Or maybe it’s the part of you that is conscious that it’s good for you to eat healthy, even if you don’t like it.

THOMAS: I guess so… Carrots, ew…

VIRGIL: [smirks] Maybe this was my fault… Patton’s cream of broccoli actually contains carrots and that’s the last meal we had before Roman and I… And you know they say you are what you eat, so…

ROMAN: [over the top dramatic voice] Carrots? You made me eat carrots!? Virgil, how could you do this to me!? I trusted you! [giggling] Seriously now, that cream of broccoli is so delicious I don’t care what it’s made with. And may I say, Virgil, you really improved on the recipe.

VIRGIL: Compared with my first try when I almost destroyed the kitchen, anything would be an improvement… but thanks for the compliment, my love.

CHRIS: Gosh, I’m so happy to see you two like this again. I don’t know if I would have had it in my heart to move out leaving anyone of you in that situation. Now I can leave in peace, knowing that you’ll be all right together.

ROMAN: Yes, sorry, Chris. This must have been awful for you and you were caught in the middle.

VIRGIL: I’m sorry too if we caused you any distress.

CHRIS: Well, all’s well that ends well. Right, Dillon?

DILLON: [adult voice] Indeed.

[Chris and the others get startled when Dillon speaks with an adult voice. They all look at him. Now, indeed, Chris is an adult Side like the others, and he’s already wearing his outfit. He’s dressed with a crimson tunic, looking like a wizard. He also carries what looks like a magic wand, like the one Merlin uses in the Disney movie “The Sword and the Stone”. He’s also wearing on the neck a golden medallion with three jewels on it, a red ruby, a purple amethyst and a crimson garnet. On his chest, he sports his logo, a crimson almond-shaped figure divided in two, one half is red and the other is purple, and inside of it a flower in the middle that looks like an almond blossom]

DILLON: What? It looks as if you had just seen a ghost.

[after a short moment of silence, Virgil is the first to talk]

VIRGIL: Aww! We didn’t have time to introduce Dillon to your brother and to Ira before he grew up! They’ll surely be bummed when they find out!

ROMAN: It’s okay. After what happened last time with Chris, I didn’t have the intention of taking that risk again. We’ll go to Sandersia tomorrow, when we’re all well rested and ready to face… whatever, who knows who will come after us next. But we’ll be ready for them.

THOMAS: Well, all I’m gonna say is… welcome to the family, Dillon. Oh, and one more thing. Dinner’s getting cold, so what the heck are you still doing there? Come on, guys!

[every body rushes to the counter to grab a serving of food]

[lemonietrinket]

Always Find Me, Yeah? ||| Stray Kids, Soft Apocalypse AU ||| Chapter Two

Summary: The anniversary of The Change, a surge in natural disasters caused by climate change that knocked the modern world back into the dark ages, is nearing. After losing contact with the rest of the group who remained stranded on the mainland, Chan and Felix are offered an opportunity to get them back. Now, they’ve just got to find them.

Genres: Dystopia/Utopia, Adventure, slight Angst (moreso at the beginning), Fluff I guess

Warnings: It is an apocalypse scenario, things might be a little bleak for some? Also it’s stupidly self-indulgent

Word Count: 2.4K

Other Chapters:   Chapter One Chapter Two

AN: This is not only my first fanfic on Tumblr, but also my first fanfic in years, so I may be a lil’ rusty. My apologies if it’s trash. I don’t really know what I’m doing. It’s also a multiparter, and I feel like it’s going to be super long so, oops. Thanks for reading!

The rain pattered against the window, running in small threads down into the gutters lining the road. The rumbling of the wind resembled thunder and drummed its irregular beat through the studio, lit only by a single sliver of glass. The beam of the morning light illuminated the monitor screen alone, the rest of the desk wedged in darkness, leaving a blade of reflected glare to cut at his eyes. Chan was perched on the edge of his chair. He’d wheeled it away from the table and into the dead centre of the room, directly below the shattered crown of the broken lightbulb. If he looked down he would be able to see where one of the shards had scraped at the varnish of the wood, but he didn’t. His focus was ensnared by his desktop, with his software and microphone sat dusty and neglected. The plugs remained switched on at the walls, on the off-chance that they would miraculously carry a current once again. But he knew it wasn’t going to happen. 

He cursed in his head. Why had he relied so closely on technology? If he hadn’t he wouldn’t have lost everything. But he had. He could hear the songs so strongly inside his skull but they were gone now, stored within the clasps of a cloud that had risen out of reach. He had his acoustic guitar of course, and it sat in the corner behind him, but no one had asked him to play and so that had been neglected too. It wasn’t the same either. His style had been permeated with electronic melodies and beats that no instrument could replicate. Instruments were embroidered within the songs but he’d always used technology to embellish them, make them his own. They could be reperformed acoustically, but acoustic covers were considered bonuses to the originals. Even if he wrote out every single musical part from memory onto paper, the songs would never be the same. His entire discography was lost.

Mixtape #2 was perhaps the only one that could still be performed.  

He caught his hand stretch towards the guitar while his feet shifted to push the chair back so he could reach. He halted himself just as his fingertips brushed the fretboard. He pulled away, just clipping one of the strings so that it made a withered, offkey hum.

Part of him wanted to pick it up, wipe off the dust, and nurse it back into tune. That part of him wanted to take the guitar with him, but the rational brain silenced the whim immediately. There was no space for a whole guitar, and his rucksack was heavy enough without another weight to haul around. However, the longer he stared at it, the worse the longing became. So he swiftly strode out of the room, closing the door behind him, keeping his eyes to the tiles.

He bundled down the stairs, almost tripping over his own feet, though before he could fetch Felix, he had to check in elsewhere first. He turned the corner into the dining room, where he found Lucas sat up the table, scrawling tinily with a nearly blunt pencil.

“What have you got there, bud?” Chan asked, drawing up a chair.

“Song lyrics,” Lucas replied, eyes still very much focused on the paper. 

“Ooh! Can I see them?” he leant over the table playfully, as his brother quickly pulled the sheet away, shooting him an eye smile.

“No, you can’t see them! Not yet.”

Chan pouted. “Please…!”

“No!”

When he heard him laugh, he finally felt a little more at ease. “Oh alright, but promise me you’ll let me read them when I get back?”

Lucas shook his head even more strongly this time, “Nope!”

“But why not?” Chan cried, folding his arms. 

“Because I’ll sing them, so you won’t have to read it.” He returned to writing, the words packed together as tightly as he could. In fact, Chan wasn’t sure he would have been able to read it if he’d been allowed to try. 

“Well, that’s a fair answer. I look forward to it! Though,” he leant his chin on his palm, “why are you writing so small?”

“To save paper. Mum said there wasn’t much left.”

“Ahh, that is true, there isn’t much plain paper left” he nodded, before whispering, “but there is some proper sheet music paper in my studio if you ever want to use it.”

The boy’s head shot up, “Really?! I can go in your studio?!”

“Of course! But, you could always go in my studio…?” he replied confusedly.

“No, Dad said I couldn’t,” Lucas sulked, “he says the stuff in there is expensive, and if I broke it I would be in humongous trouble, so he said that it’s probably better I didn’t.”

Chan rose from his chair. “Well, I say that the stuff in there is expensive, but doesn’t work anymore so there are no worries about them being broken. And since you’ve got more of a muse going than me,” he gestured to the sheet of paper, “then I say the studio is better in your hands than mine. The acoustics there are great, you know?”

“Are you leaving now?” Lucas questioned, suddenly very urgently.

“Well, I gotta pick up Felix first, otherwise he’ll get lost, and we don’t want tha- oof!”

The boy launched himself onto Chan, wrapping his arms around his waist that he could barely breathe. “Please don’t be long,” he mumbled into his sweater, “I don’t want to forget how the song goes.”

“Don’t worry, I will.” Chan hugged him back, peering down at his younger brother who was most certainly growing much faster than he expected. “And at this rate, maybe we’ll have someone in the house that can reach the top shelf!”

Lucas giggled, gazing up at him with shining eyes. “I will grow taller than you!”

“Of course you will, bud,” he ruffled his hair, and as much as it pained him, he shifted his weight backwards, so that Lucas knew it was time to pull away. As soon as he caught a glance of a tear tracing down his cheek he knelt down and wiped it away. “Hey, hey, it’s not like I’m going forever!”

“I know,” he wavered, “it’s just, you’ve only just come back and now you’re going again. I asked Mum what the land is like, and she said she didn’t know. I asked Dad what the land was like and he didn’t know either! There could be pirates or zombies or something!”

Chan chuckled, hushing him gently. “I am sure that there’s no pirates or zombies - or zombie-pirates!” he added before Lucas could. “I’ve just got to go check on my friends to make sure they’re ok, and bring them home where it’s safe.”

Lucas thought for a moment. “So it’s not safe there?”

“I… yes, no, uh…” Kids, he thought, smarter than you think.  He cleared his throat. “We don’t know, yeah? The news reports suggest that it’s a little bit messier over there than it is here, because they got hit by the earthquakes and tsunamis and stuff.”

“Plate tectonics?” Lucas interrupted proudly.

“Yes! Them! They made it a bit worse for the mainland, but it’s probably calmer now like it is here. So it’s not unsafe, it’s just, probably, better here, yeah?” Lucas nodded, rubbing at his eyes. “Ok. Right,” he exhaled sharply, “don’t cause too much trouble for Mum and Dad and Hannah yeah? And if the patrol is actually there, then I won’t be able to see Mum and Hannah again, so tell them I love them one more time for me please?”

Lucas scrunched his nose. “But you said it, like a hundred times yesterday!”

“Yes well, a hundred-and-one times isn’t going to hurt then, is it!” he ruffled his hair as he got to his feet once again. “Love you, bud.”

“Love you too Chris,” he echoed, but much quieter.

Chan stepped round the table, tucking his chair in as he went, before slotting himself halfway out of the back door. He was greeted by the sight of his father trying to get an old bit of machinery working. He had no idea what it was, but he knew better than to ask. It was sputtering way too much smoke for Chan to feel that it was safe as well, but he decided that it wasn’t the best time to question that either.

“I’m off, Dad.”

He squinted upwards, leaning back and stretching. “Are you? Ok. Be safe.”

Chan swallowed, feeling the familiar face of guilt raise its head in his gut. “I’m sorry I’m going and that it’s so soon.”

“No no, it’s alright.” Chan wasn’t sure if he was mad or not, as his tone was so neutral. Then he sent him a grim-set smile. “You need to go find them. That’s only natural. So go.”

He wanted to say a lot of things, show his gratitude, but couldn’t seem to find the words. They were all jumbled up in his head, like pieces of a jigsaw, but they all came from three different boxes. “Love you, Dad.”

There was a moment that flickered, where he thought his father wasn’t going to reply. But then, “You too, son. Now hurry up, that kid is still waiting for you, and knowing him, is going to start panicking soon.”

“Right, yes. See you later!”

Removing himself from the situation so he didn’t change his mind, Chan quickly headed back inside, ruffling Lucas’s hair as he passed, and headed out of the front door into the rain.

.

.

Felix unfurled his palm into the rain, feeling the heavy droplets nestle in his skin and morph from icy to lukewarm. He was taking shelter under the makeshift canopy of the old bandstand just behind the community garden. Some plastic chairs had been donated and placed haphazardly around the hexagon, and he’d already rearranged them into a neat circle.

In fact, he’d finished all the work he could do. It wasn’t a particularly warm day, the rain was doing a lot of the work for the gardeners, and many things had already been planted that needed to be. Over the past couple of days, he’d been given the job of sharpening and cleaning the various tools for the coming months, but they were now all in top condition and back in their places in the shed. He had nothing more to do. Julie and Peter were back to arguing again, on what to do about the outbreak of gall wasps festering inside the young lemon tree. He tried to blot them out as best he could, but the rain had calmed by the time he reached the stand, thus there was little noise. 

He hoped that Chan would hurry up, but he also knew to say goodbye to his family wasn’t easy. It had taken him a little while too. But the patrol would arrive soon, and they were nowhere near the community hall in the first place. The downpour could harshen again and then they’d have that to deal with too.

Soon, he heard footsteps coming up the path behind him, and to his luck it was Chan, though he didn’t seem in a good state.

He greeted him gently, heading over to him to save him the journey. “Shall we go then?”

Chan nodded, a darkened hue to his eyes. Felix couldn’t help but let his face fall, but he managed to work up a smile as they hastily exited the gardens and headed into the streets.

“Do you know where they’re going to be?”

Chan affirmed with a nod. “Yeah, don’t worry.”

“Good, because I can’t remember!”

He sent him a side-eye glance, a knowing grin glimmering across his lips.

It was a lie of course. Felix had his... moments... but his memory wasn’t bad. He could remember the street name with ease. It’s just he wasn’t confident that would be where his feet would take him. 

“Packed everything?” he asked.

“Yes!” Felix strongly nodded, his hands slipping under the straps of his rucksack.

Chan cleared his throat, staring determinedly ahead. “Toothbrush?”

“Yes.”

“Pillow?”

“Definitely.”

“Food?”

“Of course!”

“Form of identification?”

“Almost but I left it on the side to make sure I picked it up this time-”

“Blanket?”

Felix’s mouth was left open. “Uh...”

“Don’t worry,” he jutted his thumb back at his own bag, “I brought extra.”

“Thank youuu!”

“Knew it would happen,” he muttered, shaking his head. The air remained playful though.

They turned the corner, and at the bottom of the road, where the crackled tarmac tapered off, was a military truck. It was as nearly as wide as the street itself, with wheels built to stand mudflats or snow or both at once - or at least, Felix imagined that that’s what they were for. He was worried about it being anything else. 

He subconsciously slipped further behind Chan’s footsteps, letting him talk to the soldier that immediately stepped up to them when they reached the perimeter.

“Can we help you, kids?”

Chan ignored the final part. “We’re, uh, here for the trip to the mainland?”

The soldier, who, if Chan lifted him onto his shoulders, would still be taller than them, nodded, holding out his hand behind him. Another soldier ran over, giving him an official-looking document, which he began to leaf through.

“We registered before we came, with the officer that came round yesterday? His name was Choi? I think?” Chan winced at the lack of emotion on the man’s face. “Sir, they may not be our family, officially, but they’re, like a family to us and we have to find-”

“Surnames Bang and Lee?”

“Yes,” Felix piped up.

“Yup, just sign here and then you can throw your luggage onto the back of the truck and go through to the tent over there for supplies, or say some last-minute goodbyes. Though, if you do then I advise you don’t go far, as we’ll be leaving dead on the hour. All clear?”

“Yes, thank you,” he sent him a polite grin, handing the pen across to Felix, before ambling towards the vehicle. 

Felix began to scribble as neatly as he could, before catching the man’s eye. “Can I ask a question, please?”

“Of course.”

“Where are we...” he analysed his face, with a straight nose and angular jawline, but felt nothing, “...headed on the truck?”

“Ah,” the man turned to the side, pointing to the horizon. “Down to the takeoff site, over there.”

Satisfied, he handed back the pen. “Ok, thank you, have a nice day!” And with that, he shuffled after Chan, sending a gleaming smile over his shoulder.

~~~

Well, I don’t like this part much. It will get better I promise! In the later parts

[disappearingground]

The Jenny Lewis Experience

The New York Times July 24, 2014

A version of this article appears in print on July 27, 2014, Page 18 of the Sunday Magazine with the headline: The Jenny Lewis Experience.

By Jeff Himmelman

“They’d put the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign on,” Jenny Lewis said. We were sitting in a restaurant in Laurel Canyon, not far from her home, and she was describing her early childhood with parents who made their living performing as an itinerant Sonny-and-Cher-style lounge act called Love’s Way. “We lived in hotels,” she said. “My sister and I, they would just keep us in the hotel room, and they’d go down and play.” When Lewis was born in 1976, her parents were doing a stand at the Sands. They split up when she was 3, and her mother — herself the daughter of a dancer and a vaudeville performer — took Jenny and her sister to Van Nuys, in the San Fernando Valley, where she worked as a waitress and struggled to keep her family afloat. “We were on welfare,” Lewis said, before describing the day their fortunes changed, when an agent picked young Jenny out of a crowd at her preschool. “I think mostly because I was a redhead,” she said. “And I was a weird little kid, a weird little tomboy.”

She soon landed her first commercial, for Jell-O, and came under the wing of Iris Burton, an eminent children’s agent who represented River and Joaquin Phoenix and Fred Savage. Lewis started working steadily in commercials, television (“The Golden Girls,” “Growing Pains,” “Mr. Belvedere”) and film (“The Wizard,” “Troop Beverly Hills,” “Pleasantville”), living the surreal and somewhat communal life of a child star in the ‘80s. She spent her days being tutored on set and her evenings at places like Alphy’s Soda Pop Club in Hollywood, which catered exclusively to kids in the industry. At a party there when Lewis was 10, the actor Corey Haim handed her a cassette tape with Run-D.M.C. on one side and the Beastie Boys on the other. “There have been a couple of cassette tapes that have changed my life,” she said, “and that was the first one” — the tape that got her hooked on hip-hop, which eventually led her to songwriting.

I asked Lewis when she first fully realized the role she played in her family, the depth of their dependence on her. “Eight years old,” she said. “I remember the moment. That’s a pretty big thing for a kid to realize. And I remember the power in that.” By the time she was 14 or 15, with nobody to answer to, she could be as wild as she liked as long as she showed up to work and hit her marks. “I was up for it, honestly,” she said. “I loved the work and I loved the people, and it kind of prepped me for what I do now.”

What Lewis does now, the music she makes, is hard to characterize. She is often compared with Joni Mitchell and Emmylou Harris, and there is a kind of timelessness to the way she writes and sings. But the throwback stuff doesn’t quite capture her. Among some music fans — including many other well-known musicians — Lewis is considered a kind of indie goddess, a stylish performer who defies genre and salts her songs with a sly and off-kilter intelligence. Her first band, Rilo Kiley, signed a major-label deal with Warner Bros. Records in 2005; her first side project, the Postal Service, led by Ben Gibbard of Death Cab for Cutie, sold more than a million copies of its debut; and she has released two well-received solo records since then. Next week, she will release a third, “The Voyager,” her first solo effort in six years. It has been a battle to get it out. Among other things, she has dealt with the death of her father, writer’s block and bouts of insomnia so severe and debilitating that she said they left her almost unable to function for nearly two years.

You’d never guess that from meeting her, though. She talks like a true child of L.A. — the “bro"s and “dude"s flow freely, without affectation — and her go-to traveling costume is a vintage Adidas track suit, Adidas shell-top sneakers and, on the day I first met her, hot-pink lipstick and oversize sunglasses. She lives with her longtime boyfriend and collaborator, the musician Johnathan Rice, up a long canyon road in the hills that separate the San Fernando Valley from downtown Los Angeles. Her house (called “Mint Chip” for its brown-and-light-green exterior) is set into the hillside, looking out over a ravine. There is a rehearsal space with a drum kit, a P.A. and some vintage gear, an old piano in the living room and a vinyl edition of James Taylor’s “Sweet Baby James” propped up beside the fireplace. Beyond the small pool in the back yard there’s a windowed gazebo that Rice uses as his songwriting space. Whatever you are imagining of the California light and the laid-back lifestyle: yes.

Historically, nearby Laurel Canyon has been synonymous with a certain kind of lush ‘60s acoustic-and-multipart-harmony sound, but Lewis’s musical roots spring from the ‘90s and the smart indie rock of Elliott Smith and Pavement. When she was 20 or so, her acting career wasn’t where she wanted it to be, and she saw that she needed to make a change. “I was the best friend,” she said. “I was the friend, forever. I wanted the big, juicy roles, and they didn’t come to me.” (She read for the part of Bunny in the Coen brothers’ film “The Big Lebowski,” for one, but didn’t get it.) She had known Blake Sennett, another former child actor, since she was 17, and they began writing together and eventually formed Rilo Kiley.

She and Sennett dated and broke up and kept playing together. The relationship was always fraught (Gibbard remembers Lewis screaming at Sennett over the phone during the first Postal Service tour), but Lewis said it gave her the confidence she needed to become a real songwriter. “Through my partnership with Blake, I found a voice within myself that I didn’t know I had,” she said. “It sounds kind of cheesy, but I figured out who I was.” From the first lines of the first song on Rilo Kiley’s debut record, a track called “Go Ahead,” you can hear the DNA of the musician Lewis has become nearly 15 years later — a floating, distinct voice, an unpredictable melody, a wryly subverted rhyme.

The link between songwriting and autobiography is a tantalizing but tenuous one, and Lewis prefers to preserve as much mystery as she can. But she affirms that she has never written anything more personal than “Better Son/Daughter,” one of the strongest tracks off Rilo Kiley’s second record, “The Execution of All Things.” The song is about waking up in the morning and being unable to open your eyes or get out of bed: “And your mother’s still calling you, insane and high/Swearing it’s different this time.” Eventually it opens into an anthem of wounded fortitude, the kind you can imagine cars full of young women screaming along to. The actress Anne Hathaway, one of Lewis’s close friends, told me that she still turns to that song whenever she’s struggling. “It’s become almost like a prayer,” she said.

Outside whatever veiled references she makes in her music, Lewis doesn’t talk much about her mother. She acknowledged that it was a “difficult relationship” and that she didn’t have a “traditional upbringing,” but that was about it. At one point, I referred to a report in The Boston Globe in 1992, when Lewis was 16, noting that she owned a house in Sherman Oaks and a townhouse in North Hollywood. “We lost all of that,” she said, with a blankness I hadn’t seen from her before. I asked her why. “We just lost ‘em,” she said. “I achieved a lot as a child, I supported my family, but in the end we lost it all.”

In 2004, Rilo Kiley toured with Coldplay, but Lewis was still scraping by, living in a small apartment in Silver Lake with an Iranian rockabilly musician she found on Craigslist. In her bedroom, when she wasn’t on tour, she wrote the songs that would become “Rabbit Fur Coat,” her first solo record. The idea for it came from Conor Oberst, the songwriter (also known as the frontman of Bright Eyes) who helped form Saddle Creek Records, which had put out “The Execution of All Things.” “I encouraged her,” Oberst told me. “You know, why don’t you step away from this thing that is obviously causing you a lot of distress and make a record on your own?” Sennett had already made a solo record, which upset Lewis. “I was so jealous if someone else got Blake’s musical attention,” she told me. “I was shattered by it.” She made “Rabbit Fur Coat,” she said, in part to prove that “I can do it too on my own — I don’t need you.”

The songs on “Rabbit Fur Coat” are ethereal and haunted, rooted in deep Southern and gospel-inflected melodic traditions. On the record’s title track, Lewis’s lyrics again invite comparison with her family life:

Let’s move ahead 20 years, shall we? She was waitressing on welfare, we were living in the valley A lady says to my ma, “You treat your girl as your spouse You can live in a mansion house.”

And so we did, and I became a hundred-thousand-dollar kid . . . But I’m not bitter about it I’ve packed up my things and let them have at it And the fortune faded, as fortunes often do And so did that mansion house

Where my ma is now, I don’t know She was living in her car, I was living on the road And I hear she’s putting stuff up her nose . . .

After the record was done, Lewis went on tour with Rilo Kiley. When the band played the Showbox in Seattle in 2005, Gibbard picked her up after sound check. They’d become friends during the Postal Service tour a few years earlier. As they drove around in Gibbard’s car, Lewis played the new songs for him. “I just remember, all hyperbole aside, being completely blown away,” Gibbard said. “It was undoubtedly the best thing that she had done.” The press shared Gibbard’s reaction, and Lewis got more attention on her own than Rilo Kiley had ever gotten as a band. “Everything was so easy for the first time,” she said. “It just unfolded so naturally. And then going out on the road and touring was the most fun I’ve ever had on tour. There was no tension for the first time.” Rilo Kiley would put out one more record, but it soon became clear that it would be their last.

“I want to show you something,” Lewis said. We were talking in her kitchen about her second solo release, “Acid Tongue,” which she recorded over three weeks in 2008 at the legendary Sound City Studios in Van Nuys. The record had a bunch of special guests on it — Elvis Costello, Chris Robinson of the Black Crowes — but the most meaningful one was Lewis’s dad, who died in 2010. In the living room, she pointed out a glass vitrine on top of the piano that held one of her father’s chromatic bass harmonicas. Before the “Acid Tongue” sessions, she hadn’t spoken to her father in years, but she felt comfortable enough with the musical family she had created around her — Rilo Kiley’s drummer, Jason Boesel; Johnathan Rice; some other musicians from the Laurel Canyon set — that she thought she could handle having him around. He played on the track “Jack Killed Mom,” and the reunion helped Lewis forgive him for leaving the family all those years ago. “He was playing lounges in Alaska,” Lewis said of when she tracked him down and asked him to play on the album. “That’s why I never saw him. It was not a malicious thing. My dad was a savant. He never drove a car, he never had a bank account,” she said. “I don’t even know if he realized that he wasn’t around, you know? I think he was just playing his gigs, trying to make a living.”

“Acid Tongue” was also a step toward recording everything all at once, live, to an analog tape machine — instead of in pieces to a computer. It’s a process that Lewis has developed a devotion to, and one that the songwriter and producer Ryan Adams would push to an extreme on “The Voyager.” (After “Acid Tongue,” Lewis and Rice released “I’m Having Fun Now” in 2010, an underrated duo record that failed to get the kind of traction they hoped for.) For the last few years, Lewis had been sitting on many of the songs that would make up “The Voyager,” battling insomnia and struggling to get them down. She ran into Adams in Los Angeles and told him she had some songs she was working on, and he invited her to come by his studio, Pax-Am, on the Sunset Strip. She played a few of the tunes for him on her acoustic guitar.

‘My dad was a savant,’ Lewis said. ‘He never drove a car, he never had a bank account. I don’t even know if he realized that he wasn’t around, you know?’

“My initial impression was there were some really minimal but necessary things that had to happen,” Adams told me. “I could tell that she had sat with them a little too long.” (Lewis agrees: “I was like: ‘Dude, go for it. Help me.’ ”) On the first song that they worked on together, “She’s Not Me,” they changed the key to relax Lewis’s voice, and then Adams and his production partner, Mike Viola, strapped on electric guitars and rolled through the full song, three times, with Lewis playing and singing live with a backing band. Adams pronounced the track finished for the time being and said they would move on, without even listening back to what they’d done. “For Jenny, revisionism wouldn’t have worked,” Adams said. “The version she would play on the couch in the control room, we would just stand there, like, ‘Wow, this is classic songwriting.’ Every time. So that was sort of my mission. How do we get an ‘unmind’ vibe here and then go back later and look at these beautiful raw takes and just splash a little bit of watercolor on them.” Lewis ended up recording the bulk of the record with Adams over 10 days. (She worked on the single, “Just One of the Guys,” separately with Beck before she and Adams went into the studio together.)

“The Voyager” is an older and more direct record than her previous two. Her characters are still drinking and doing blow and cheating on each other, but there is a kind of weariness to it all. One line in particular has caught the early attention of some of her many female fans, during the bridge of “Just One of the Guys”: “There’s only one difference between you and me/When I look at myself all I can see/I’m just another lady without a baby.” She has been hesitant to acknowledge what that line specifically means to her. “I wanted to communicate some very basic things,” she told me, without saying what they were. She was already starting to regret having talked about some of her other struggles while making the record, including open discussion of the insomnia that plagued her. “Now everyone’s asking me about insomnia, which I’m terrified is going to happen to me again,” she said. “You can’t think about it too much, and everyone’s asking me about it, and I’m like, ‘I’m fine, I’m fine.’ But, [expletive], am I not going to get to sleep again?” You could hear the fear in her voice. “It’s my fault for putting it out there,” she said.

The video for “Just One of the Guys,” which got more than a million views in its first 24 hours online, was made with the actresses (and Lewis’s friends) Anne Hathaway, Brie Larson, Kristen Stewart and Tennessee Thomas. It’s an entertaining video, part Robert Palmer, part Beastie Boys, with the women spending half the time playing a sleek female backing band and then switching into male roles, clowning around in Lewis-inspired Adidas track suits and fake mustaches. Lewis, as herself, holds up a positive pregnancy test, to which Lewis-in-drag-and-fake-goatee responds, “It’s not [expletive] mine.” When she gets to the “just another lady without a baby” line, she smiles at the camera and then dances. It’s a house of mirrors, a romp through emotionally treacherous terrain.

When I visited Lewis in June, she and Rice (she calls him “Rico”) showed me an early cut of the video in the bedroom of their house, with Lewis calling out “bra shot” whenever we caught a glimpse of her cleavage. Driving down the hill toward dinner later, we got to talking, if somewhat obliquely, about the expectations of her female fans and the sexuality that is inseparable from who she is and the music she makes. She didn’t like to talk about feminism, she said, and in particular the trend of women criticizing one another for not being feminist enough: “What does it matter what I think of Lana Del Rey?” In the months before the release of “The Voyager,” Lewis has taken to wearing airbrushed suits for her live shows, rather than the sexier get-ups she used to wear onstage; she has said she feels “androgynous” these days and wants her costume to reflect that. But not always. As we made our way down the ravine, she told a story about the day President Obama came to visit a compound not far from Mint Chip. She wanted to go out for a run, but a Secret Service member stopped her and told her she needed an ID if she wanted to get back through the security cordon. “I was like, ‘Dude, I’m wearing short shorts,’ ” Lewis said. " ‘You’ll remember me.’ ”

After recording and touring mostly with men in the early days, Lewis now consistently seeks out women for her band and even tried to put together an all-female crew for the “Just One of the Guys” video, which she also directed. She said her desire to work largely with women was a response to the dissolution of her relationship with her mom. “The more I surround myself with women, the easier it is to reconcile my past in a way.” It seems to be serving a kind of psychic need, to replace the female relationship that once dominated her life with a kind of surrogate family of her choosing, a family that has stood behind her through the struggles of the last few years.

“I’m happy to see her making records,” Beck told me. “I just feel like music needs her. It needs someone doing what she’s doing. She’s got a special voice, as a writer, and then as a musician. She’s this great combination of so many things.” Conor Oberst shares that view, describing Lewis as one of the most important songwriters and performers in contemporary music. “Go see her play,” Oberst said. “Because we should all feel lucky to be around while she’s doing her magic.”

On a night in early June, at a sold-out show at the 9:30 Club in Washington, Lewis had her magic all lined up and ready to go. Backstage, she was relaxed, joking with her band and casually doing her makeup in the mirror on the wall. Just before show time, one band member disappeared, but Lewis was unperturbed. “It’s O.K.,” she said with a smile when he showed up, apologizing, just as they were about to go on. “You made it!” She took a sip of red wine out of a plastic cup and then walked up the steps to the stage.

‘I just feel like music needs her,’ Beck said. ‘It needs someone doing what she’s doing. She’s got a special voice, as a writer, and then as a musician.’

To watch Lewis perform live is to understand what Beck and Oberst and other musicians admire in her. “She turns into this other person on stage,” Gibbard said, “this unbelievably powerful performer” — and it’s true. Lewis is both a natural and a pro. Throughout the night, she had big middle-aged guys and teenage girls — “teeny little chickens,” as she called them later — singing along to every word. During the encore, Lewis sang the ballad “Acid Tongue” accompanied only by her acoustic guitar and the rest of her band grouped around a microphone behind her. “To be lonely is a habit,” Lewis sang, her voice ringing out in the near-silent room, “like smoking or taking drugs, and I’ve quit them both. . . . " The audience and her band belted along with her as she finished the line: “But man was it rough.”

It was one of those lovely moments you hope for in live music, when everything in the room connects. But it was also a kind of emblem of where Lewis has been and of where she is now. She has overcome all kinds of obstacles to get here, often with great style, but it hasn’t always been pretty. Whatever demons stole her sleep for these last few years, they’ve surely been with her forever, in one form or another. But they are also what gives such depth and soul to what she does. “I’m not looking for a cure,” Lewis sang, and as she stood in the spotlight at the 9:30 Club, nobody there would have thought she needed one.

[trashforhockeyguys]

Back to you (12)//Auston Matthews

A/N: And here it is. The very last part of Back to You. I’m so thankful for the love my very first multipart/ series got. As always, thank you guys from the bottom of my heart.

You stood next to Steph, watching as her and Mitch hand hands and recited their vows to one another. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t holding back tears as you watched two of your best friends finally exchange rings.

 You’d been waiting years for the two of them to finally tie the knot. You’d known, long before either of them had realized, that they were going to be the couple to outlast the rest of you. There was just something about the two of them together that just seemed to work better. You loved them, yet somehow also kind of hated them for it.

 You clapped and cheered with everyone else when they were pronounced man and wife. You couldn’t help but smile at both of them as they pranced back down the aisle. Your heart seemed to ache though, when you had to rejoin the best man and walk behind the two newlyweds.

 This wasn’t how you’d planned for all of this to happen. As much as you loved Mitch and Steph, you never thought they’d get married before you. Or get married while you were so single you couldn’t even remember what it was like to be in a relationship.

 Five years.

 It’d been five, long, agonizing, years.

 You plastered on a smile for all of the pictures. You kept it on just long enough to duck into the bathroom, claiming you had to fix your makeup before the reception. But really, you just needed a second to breathe, and take a swig from the small flask you’d contently hidden in your clutch. In your defense, Katherine was the one who suggested it.

 You took a few minutes to try and pull yourself together again. You clutched onto the bathroom sink and tried to breathe. You hated that you felt this way. It had been five fucking years, you should be able to smile and take a few pictures with him. You should be able to dance with him, and celebrate your best friends. But you couldn’t. And you hated yourself for it.

 “Get your shit together,” You told yourself, looking in the mirror, “Just a few hours, and then you won’t have to see him again for another five years, probably.”

 There was a knock at the bathroom door, “Y/N? Can you let me in?”

 You sighed, realizing it was Mitch. You crossed the small bathroom and unlocked the door so he could slip in. When he smiled at you, you couldn’t help but think about how this was your little Mitchy. Your best friend. The only person, besides Katherine, who’d known you almost your entire life.

 “You okay?” He questioned.

 “You just got married,” You laughed, “Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

 He grinned, wider than you’d seen in a very long time, “Yeah I did.”

 “I’ve heard the bliss goes away after a while,” You joked.

 “Y/N, I just got married,” He stated again, “Holy shit.”

 You couldn’t help but laugh. Sure, Mitch had more than matured over the years, but he was always little Mitchy. He’d always be your goofy childhood friend. Wife, or no wife.

 “Are you okay though?” He questioned again, “I know putting the two of you together wasn’t ideal but you two are so important to-“

 “Mitch, I know,” You sighed, “It’s okay. I’m an adult, I can handle it.”

 “You just took a shot didn’t you?” He questioned, not even upset.

 “Not a wedding if I don’t,” You shrug, “I’ll be good though.”

 He cracked a smile and pulled you in for a tight hug. You relaxed after a second and hugged him back. You kept reminding yourself that you were doing this for your best friends. You’d get through this night for them. You’d continue to go to his games, because you loved him and Steph like they were family. For them, you could do this.

 “Alright,” You sighed, “Enough hiding in the bathroom.”

 He grinned and dropped his arm over your shoulder before throwing the bathroom door open. You were met by Matt Martin, who looked like he could’ve had his ear pressed to the door. You laughed as Mitchy dropped his other arm over Matt’s shoulder, and marched the two of you towards everyone else.

 Matt was telling Mitch how proud he was of him. You wanted to tell Mitch that and so much more, but words weren’t exactly your specialty anymore, not unless you’d taken the time to fully write them out. It was like you’d somehow lost a piece of you after you left the Leafs’ PR team. You’d spent years trying to figure it out, but eventually you learned to just roll with it.

 “You’re winging your speech tonight, right?” Mitch joked.

 “You wish,” You laughed.

“Hey, I heard Dubs is trying to get you to come back,” Willy added.

 “Too bad he hasn’t heard she’s a crazy cat lady now,” Kasperi laughed.

 You reached over and wacked his arm before putting a hand over your heart, “You’ve wounded me, fishy.”

 He laughed and pulled you in for a hug. One thing all of the guys still remembered, is that a smile hug made you forget almost anything. You ruffled the Finnish boy’s hair just enough before taking a step back and giving him a big smile.

 “Alright, if you would all kindly line back up so we can walk out for the reception.”

 You sighed and rolled your shoulders, trying to relive the tension already starting to build. You tried to ignore the body that stood right next to you, but it became impossible when he held his hand out for you to grab.

 You were the maid of honor and the best man, you had to at least act like you were happy to be paired with one another. Even if it was close to causing you physical pain.

 “You uh, you look good Y/N,” He told you, speaking for the first time since before the ceremony started.

 “Yeah,” You mumbled, “You too.”

 You two were the last ones to walk out before Mitch and Steph. You clutched onto Auston, mainly because Steph had picked up massive heals for you to wear and you were terrified of falling flat on your face.

 You couldn’t help but notice how he still seemed so warm. It was like nothing had changed. You could still feel his body heat through his suit coat, just like you always had. You had to fight yourself from moving closer.

 Everything inside of you craved it. You still craved his touch, the way he always waited on you after a long day at the rink, or how you always woke up in his arms, you just craved him. You wanted to hate yourself for you, you were the one that left this time, it was your choice. You shouldn’t regret it, but you couldn’t help it.

 “Dance with me?”

 You looked up from your glass of red. Auston was standing in less than two feet away, holding a hand out for you. You had déjà vu to say the least. All you could think about was how long it’d been since you’d danced with him at Katherine’s wedding. Nearly seven years in fact.

 “Auston-“

 “Please? Just one dance?” He questioned, “If not for me, then for Steph and Mitchy.”

 You sighed and pulled your heals off, carefully pushing them under your seat. He watched you, seemingly amused, as you quickly drank the rest of your wine. Slowly, you stood from your chair and put your phone back in your bag.

 “One dance, but only because I know Mitch would have a bitch fit if I didn’t,” You sighed.

 “You’re right about that,” He laughed, “Steph too.”

 You shook your head and let him lead you towards the dance floor. Mitch and Steph were slowly swaying back and forth. Your heart melted at the sight. You loved the two of them more than you’d ever be able to tell them. They were your family.

 “Mitch mentioned you’d been seeing someone?” Auston asked quietly.

 “Saw someone,” You admitted, “As in, once and a long time ago.”

 “Oh?”

 “Turns out he was a big hockey fan,” You slightly shrugged, “He just wanted to know what my job had been like. You know, since I got to work with all of you.”

 Auston smiled and shook his head, “Even when you’re not working with us, you can’t get away from us.”

 “I’ve never been able to get away from any of you guys,” You admitted, “Not when half the team is constantly calling me for shit.”

 “They miss you,” He said softly, before whispering, “I miss you.”

 The song ended, allowing you to pull away without anyone questioning. You felt the pit in your stomach start to grow. The way he was looking at you was enough to cause your heart to break all over again. You left him, he didn’t stop you.

 You swallowed and forced air back into your lungs. You wanted to walk away, but you didn’t want to leave the feeling of his hands still on your waist. You tried to shake out of it, but the longer you held eye contact, the harder it became.

 “I can’t,” Your voice broke as you finally turned and hastily walked away.

 You made a break for the small clearing, just out of sight of everyone. You needed to breathe and clear your head. All you could think of was how that was supposed to be you and Auston up at the altar. It was always meant to be you.

 It was supposed to be the two of you up there. Years before Mitch and Steph. You’d had a plan, and Auston seemed to agree for so long. Until of course, the night that he changed his mind.

 “Y/N, wait,” His voice was hushed as he gently grabbed your arm, “What just happened? What’s wrong?”

 “I can’t do this every year Auston,” You told him, “I can’t stand up there with you and support our friends when every time one of them said it should have been you and I.”

 “Y/N-“

 “And I hate dancing with you because it hurts. It hurts being close to you,” You kept on, “And I know that I’m the one who left, okay? I know that. But I didn’t see another choice, because you chose a different path for us. You decided something without me, and I was expected to pick up the pieces and I couldn’t do that again.”

 He didn’t stay a thing, he only wanted on you to continue, because he knew there was more. He knew there were a lot of things you needed to stay to him, a lot of things you’d never had the courage to say.

 “I couldn’t see myself just waiting around for you anymore. Or at any events I’d never be able to say that I was your wife, or fiancé, I’d always just be the girlfriend. The last time you seriously got hurt, and they had to take you to the hospital, they almost wouldn’t let me see you because I wasn’t family. Girlfriend wasn’t good enough for them.”

 He shook his head, “I never wanted that for you. I wanted more for you, for us.”

 “You had a funny way of showing it,” You countered.

 “I don’t want to fight with you again, not today,” He sighed, turning around to walk away.

 “I knew about the ring,” You mumbled.

 “You what?”

 It was true of course. You’d found the beautifully simple engagement ring in his gym bag, not long before the two of you had finally called it off. You hadn’t been snooping, in fact he was the one that asked you to go into his bag for something. But in one of the inside pockets, you happened to come across the ring box, and you were more than curious.

 You wished you’d never had found the ring. Things would’ve been so different. Maybe you would’ve stayed, because you wouldn’t have known any different, or maybe you two would’ve been able to work through it all. It seemed like all you could think about was maybe.

 “I found it not long before the fight. That’s why when you- when you said what you did, I just couldn’t.”

 He rubbed his face, you could see the pain in his eyes when he finally looked at you, “I didn’t- fuck. I-“

 “You called everyone that was important to me, so you could ask for their permission,” You stated, “Did you think I wouldn’t find out? Auston, you were obviously planning on proposing, but then you didn’t.”

 “I-,” he stopped and sighed, “You wouldn’t understand.”

 “I’m sure I wouldn’t,” You felt your eyes staring to burn, “I told you once that I’d always go back to you Auston, and I wish, god I wish that weren’t still true.”

 “I’m sorry-“

 “No, Auston, I’m sorry. I’m the one who left, and I wish I could take it back, but nothing would change. We always end up right back where we started.”

You felt hot tears starting to roll down your cheeks. The both of you knew this was it, there was nothing more either of you could do. The two of you had been stuck in a continuous loop for years now. It wasn’t healthy for either of you, no matter how much you loved each other.

 You took a few steps forward, so you were right in front of Auston. You quickly brushed the tears away before leaning up to kiss him. There was nothing special about it. The both of you were crying, you were shaking.

 “I love you Y/N,” He said, his voice shaking.

 “I love you too Auston,” You whispered, “Always.”

 You were just about to round the corner of the hedge that hid us when you heard his voice again.

 “I wanted to marry you,” He said, “Shit, I still do. I’d spend the rest of my life with you if I could.”

 Took you like a shot, thought that I could chase you with a cold evening.

 You turned slowly. He hadn’t moved, but he was looking at you different. You took a few steps towards him again.

 “Y/N, I mean it,” He stated again, “I miss you, the house is so empty without you.”

“Aus,” You mumbled.

 “I’m not going to ask, because I know what you’d say,” He sighed, “But Y/N, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, that’s never changed.”

 “We shouldn’t do this again,” You reminded him.

 “Please.”

 You wanted to do the right thing. You wanted to be able to walk away from him and be strong enough to not look back. But you couldn’t. No matter how hard you tried to fight it, but you didn’t have the strength. You never had the strength with him.

 Won’t lie….I’d go back to you.

[melodramaticfanatic-blog]

Window to your soul(mate) - Ch. 1

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x reader

Warnings: smut…eventually. Fluff and slow burn Summary: 3 months after moving to New York City, Y/N feels like she has finally found her footing. She has a great apartment, is making friends and has a steady enough job to pay the rent. She’s even gotten used to the empty apartment across from hers...but all that changes when a handsome film star returns home after months of being away.

A/N: Multipart fanfic series; no idea how long it might end up being as it has evolved on it’s own. Gonna be posting both Ch. 1 and Ch. 2 together since this is more of an intro piece and doesn’t fully enjoy the delightful Sebby!

Master list

Gif not mine, credit to owner

The apartment was bright, all the curtains opened to let in the spring sun and fresh air. Finally, after several months of living here in New York City, Y/N felt as though it was becoming home. When she had first moved in to the top floor apartment of this cold, industrial building, Y/N had felt as though she would never belong. Deep in her heart she knew she was lucky; there were far worse apartments she could have been stuck with. If the building’s property manager hadn’t been a family friend, there was no chance she would have landed the large 1-bedroom apartment for such a reasonable price. Still, being in the city, surrounded by noise and buildings so close on either side, you could see into the apartment across from you was a far cry from the open farm land where she had grown up. 

When Y/N chose to move, that was exactly what she thought she wanted: something completely different. She had just found out that her high school sweetheart, Dave, had been cheating on her throughout their entire relationship. The revelation had been earth shattering. All through high school, college and even the years after graduation, Y/N had been loyal and believed that Dave was her future. She had been sure that he would take over his father’s farm, marry her and together they would grow old and happy. Instead, Dave had cheated on Y/N with her closest friends and almost any woman that would look his way. 

A change was definitely what Y/N needed. So after spending all her life in a small town, she packed her bags and moved to the big city. 

Looking around the apartment, Y/N had to admit that she had made a very warm living space. Three months ago when she had moved in, the walls were plain, grey and dull. Now they were a light blue, welcoming and tastefully decorated with art prints and family photos. There were beautiful hard wood floors, a small but nice kitchen and most importantly to Y/N, a balcony that protruded from the bedroom. It wasn’t a large balcony, just enough room for a standing plant and a chaise lounge chair, but it looked out over the small garden that sat between her building and the one next door. Having this small amount of greenery in such a big city was a source of immense comfort. It spoke of home. Y/N spent as much time as she could out on that balcony, reading, enjoying the breeze and looking into the windows of the apartment next door. 

At first, Y/N had been shy about the fact that her windows could see right into the other apartment. She had been careful to keep the curtains closed and always checked to make sure no one was out on the balcony of that apartment before going to hers. As time went by however, Y/N realized that no one was ever home. The apartment was definitely owned by someone; the rooms were furnished nicely and there were framed photos on the walls of the living room behind a large couch that looked like a comfortable leather. Yet the lights were never on, no one ever came or went and nothing ever changed inside. After a month of curiously waiting for the occupant to show themselves, Y/N decided the apartment must be owned by someone who had several houses and never came to the city. That or they were on a very extended vacation. Once she had decided that, Y/N became more and more comfortable, leaving the curtains open, letting the balcony doors stay ajar to let fresh air in and even laying out on her balcony in just her bra and underwear; after all, she was on the top floor...who could see?

This Saturday morning however, Y/N had no time to lay out in comfort. After a week of working night shifts at the restaurant where she was a hostess and bartender, Y/N’s apartment had turned into a disaster area. A pile of to go containers peaked out of the kitchen trash can, the floors showed salt stained foot prints from where her boots had tracked across them and a pile of laundry sat in the bin, staring her down as though challenging her to see how much longer she could stretch her wardrobe. With a heavy sigh, Y/N stretched and went to get her iPod. If she was going to spend her precious time off cleaning, she was going to listen to music while she did. 

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Several hours later, Y/N was sweating and looking around the apartment in a satisfied way. The dishes were washed and replaced in the cabinets, the floors were vacuumed and mopped, she had bagged up all her recycling and trash and dropped it down the chutes at the end of the hall. Y/N had even taken the time to wash all her windows so that the sun could stream into the room as brightly as possible. For a moment while she washed them, Y/N had thought she saw movement in the apartment across from hers through the droplet coated glass. After wiping the cleaner away she stared into the living room that had become so familiar over the months. Nothing had changed and Y/N shrugged it off as a trick of the light. 

Now, standing in the kitchen Y/N looked down at her sweat and dirt covered pajamas. She hadn’t bothered showering when she awoke, knowing that after the marathon cleaning her place needed she would only end up showering again anyway. Pulling her head phones from her ears, Y/N began to strip down, stripping off her tank top and the small shorts and underwear she had slept in. Grateful to be out of the sticky clothes, Y/N walked to the wide window in the living room, looking up at the sky. It was a clear, spring blue, dotted with puffy white clouds that seemed to hang in place as though a painter had splotched them across the sky with a sponge brush. For several moments, Y/N stood looking up at the sky, enjoying the feel of the sun through the glass and stretching lazily. Then her eyes traveled down to the window of the apartment across from hers. 

Y/N’s heart leapt into her throat and she dropped down to crouch against the wall below the level of the window. There was a man in the window across from her! A man was standing there, just staring at her, his jaw hanging open. Cursing her own stupidity at standing naked in the window, Y/N crawled along the floor to the bedroom and grabbed a robe. She hurriedly threw it over her body, wrapping herself into the cotton protection it offered and then immediately rushed to shut the balcony doors and close the curtains, shielding herself from the prying eyes next door.

“Way to go moron,” Y/N muttered to herself as she made her way into the bathroom for a shower. 

While she scrubbed herself clean, Y/N tried to get angry with the unknown man. Who did he think he was, standing there gawking at her? What kind of peeping tom pervert lived there? Yet she couldn’t make herself believe it. This had been her fault. He hadn’t known that she would be dumb enough to stand naked in plain view. Surely, he had just been taken by surprise and unable to believe his eyes. No, Y/N wasn’t mad at the man, she was just terribly embarrassed at her own behavior. 

After carefully getting dressed and making sure every bit of skin was covered, Y/N made her way back out into the living room, intending to close the curtains and drown her embarrassment in a pint of ice cream and some old movies. As she went to pull the curtains closed, something caught her eye. There was a sign in the window of the other apartment. Half hidden behind the curtains, Y/N stood and read the large letters. 

Extremely sorry. Total accident. Wasn’t trying to spy on you

Y/N stared at the sign. The stranger was apologizing for her bad behavior. Walking quickly to the kitchen, Y/N pulled open a drawer and grabbed a sharpie. That was the easy part, but she had no idea what to write on. She hadn’t been prepared to send messages window to window. Spotting an empty pizza box that wouldn’t fit down the building’s recycling chute, Y/N opened the cardboard box up and wrote on the back.

Not your fault, all mine. So sorry, won’t happen again

Unsure what else to write, Y/N took the box and propped it against the window where the man could read it from his side. Then she quickly closed the curtains and collapsed onto the sofa. 

“Well,” she murmured out loud to herself, “that’s one way to meet the neighbors.”

Next

[afteriwake]

Ever Changing, Ever Growing (5/6 - A “The Curious Case of Love & Family” Story)

And here is John’s introduction into the series and a bit more of how Sherlock and Margaret interact with each other.

Ever Changing, Ever Growing - They make the arrangement to present what society wants from them to the world as husband and wife, but childhood friends Sherlock Holmes and Margaret Hooper agree that their lives are their own. But what happens when the agreement for their marriage of convenience is rewritten to allow experimentation of a more intimate nature between them?

READ CHAPTER 1 | READ CHAPTER 5 | SERIES PAGE | HELP ME SURVIVE? | COMMISSION ME? | BUY ME A KOFI?

Sherlock’s partner was at Baker Street when Margaret arrived back there, and Sherlock gave them a relatively brief introduction before turning back in on himself. He had smiled at the sight of the purple sash on her shoulder so she assumed he did not have any mind to her working on the suffrage movement, though John grimaced slightly. “My wife’s doing?”

“And my...sister-in-law,” she said, almost calling Beatrice by her proper name. “They’re lovely women. Very opinionated and very brash. I enjoy the company.”

“Well, we love the women we love,” he said before running his fingers on his mustache. “And I think Sherlock cares for you as well, in his own way. Until we received the case this afternoon, he talked of nothing but you. I told him it was a travesty we had to wait so long to meet.”

Margaret blushed slightly. “Well, it’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance,” she said as she sat across from him and helped herself to Sherlock’s cup of tea, as it was growing cold. She knew he would not mind; he enjoyed the new drink, coffee, much more. Said it stimulated his mind more, though she knew he occasionally dabbled in his seven percent solution as well, much to her consternation. John grinned and chuckled softly as he watched.

“I assume the two of you acted much like a married couple before you made it official,” he said.

“I suppose we did,” she said, tilting her head. “It just seems we have settled into this easily, but today is the first day of truly being man and wife in the eyes of all. We shall have to see what it brings.”

Sherlock blinked and then took the cup from Margaret’s fingers, taking a sip. “My cup.”

“Well, you were ignoring it,” she said. “And you know I prefer my tea slightly cooled.”

Sherlock made a face as he tasted it and then pushed the cup towards the saucer she was holding. “How? It’s ghastly.”

“I’ll make you a fresh cup, then,” she said with a soft laugh, leaning over and kissing his cheek. Though she knew John was among those who knew the marriage was simply one of convenience, it would help to occasionally be affectionate, to get in the habit, especially if they were to show society up, so to speak.

“You did pick a good one,” John said as she walked away to get more tea.

“Indeed I did,” she heard Sherlock reply before she left the room. It took time to heat the water and brew the tea, but when she returned John had left and Sherlock had moved to look out the window. “Thank you, Molly.”

“You’re welcome,” she said, handing him the fresh cup. “What case did you get?”

“A most peculiar one,” he said. “From my brother. There is a woman he has asked us to look for, a mistress of disguise. She has, apparently, escaped from an asylum and goes by the name Eurus.”

“Frightful,” Margaret said. “What is his interest in her?”

“He hasn’t said, but he has told us she’s dangerous. But without further information, I cannot even come up with an apt description, much less her motivations for escape.” He moved a hand to finger the sash at her shoulder. “Votes for women. I had the feeling the two of them would convince you to attend at least one of their meetings.”

“I’ll be going to a march in a few days,” she said. “I never would have dared before.”

“If you face arrest, I will come and claim you and rescue you from jail,” he said. “Who knows? Perhaps I will don the sash myself and join you in the march if this case goes nowhere.”

“Are you sure?” she said. “I mean, I have been interested in this subject but I’ve never broached it with you, and I don’t want to presume--”

“Equal say is important in making sure the government works,” he said. “All people with the proper standing in life, which is life itself, should have the right to vote at a certain age. We’ll start with women and then work from there till the right is given to all. It’s what’s...right.”

“I believe, then, your presence may well be welcomed at the march,” she said, looking up at him with a warm smile and getting one in return. This boded well for them. Hopefully, this fake marriage would not complicate the matters of their friendship much if they were to have any disagreements.

[flamingo-writes]

Your Hands Only — Levi Ackerman x Reader

Multipart — [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5]

Summary: Erwin shows up in the clinic with an interesting proposal. However, Levi isn’t quite sure you should take it, so he suggests something else instead. That day, what you thought was a very normal day turned out for the worst.

Word Count: 2486

A/N:   If you’d like to be tagged in this story whenever there’s a new chapter, let me know.

Warnings: swearing.

Levi walked inside the clinic, noticing how the waiting room was more crowded than it usually was. As he walked towards the door to your checking room he noticed Pascal sobbing silently next to the door.

Pascal had grown so much in the last 6 years, he was around Levi’s height, and over all he hadn’t changed much, except his hair was now long enough he could tie it in a short ponytail with a few curls falling softly on his forehead.

“Oi, brat. Is everything alright?” Levi asked, as the teenager cleaned his tears with his sleeve and nodded. “What happened?”

“I was in there, helping Y/N. This gu-guy had a terrible bleeding, and she asked me to stop it while she continued working, b-but I-I couldn’t. She started yelling at me”

“Ah, she does that” Levi sighed. “It’s nothing personal. She gets really grumpy when she’s under pressure” He remembered that time he’d helped you for the first time to stitch a patient.

“What the fuck is that?” You yelled at him. “You call that a bloody stitch? No wonder why you soldiers end up with gross scars when you stitch yourselves up! Disgusting!”

“Shut up, this is how I was taught how to do them”

“I knew you soldiers were brutes, but this is too much”

“Don’t be such a bitch”

“I’ll stop being a bitch when you can properly stitch someone”

And of course, Levi could never forget the phrase. A phrase you used a lot whenever anyone was trying to help you when you didn’t want any:

“If you’re going to be useless, at least make sure you’re not getting in the way or slowing me down”

He hated more than anything when you spoke to him like that. You were insufferable when it came to your work, reason why he usually lend you a hand with cleaning rather than healing wounds. It made him understand why you were so good at it, and specially how your unorthodox system of yelling at him and calling him names made him learn rather quick. And most importantly, he’d learned how to make proper stitches that barely left a scar.

“Do you think she’s mad at me?” Pascal asked Levi distracting him from the flashbacks of you yelling at him.

“She’s not. Trust me. I’ve been where you are. As soon as she’s finished she’ll apologise”

*

Fifteen minutes later, the man who was inside left, being helped by a couple of nurses. Levi walked inside your checking room as if he was walking inside his own house, followed by Pascal who unlike the captain, walked inside like a scared dog with its tail between his legs.

“Need any help?” Levi said when he found you washing your needle holder and your Kelly forceps.

“Please” You answered, knowing that you didn’t have to give Levi further instructions. He’d been coming every now and then for the last 7 years, giving you a hand. He was perfectly capable of helping you with whatever you needed without him asking or you telling him what to do.

You saw Pascal from the corner of your eye, and you turned your eyes to him, calling his name, as he stood up straight like a soldier and avoided eye contact. And just like Levi had told Pascal earlier, you apologised.

“I’m sorry for yelling earlier, kiddo” You said in a low voice. “I was stressed, and I really needed to stop that bleeding”

“Y-yeah, it’s alright…” Pascal muttered, looking at Levi.

“I’ll be staying here for a few more hours, I’m still not done. Make sure you don’t head back home too late, yes?” You said as you dried your equipment.

“I should be probably leaving” The boy said looking at the sunset from the window. “I’ll see you later, then”

“Be careful” You said as Pascal walked towards the door. “Pascal, wait” He stopped, and turned around, meeting your eyes. “I really am sorry for yelling at you”

“Don’t worry about it...we’re good” He sighed, as you kept staring at him, frowning. “Really. I’m not mad”

“Neither am I” You added.

“Good...I’ll be leaving now”

*

Levi stayed in your checking room helping you out. He didn’t need any medical attention, he was basically keeping you company and helping you either cleaning or handing you stuff. For seven years he’d been going every so often to see you. Either because he was leaving for a mission, or he was returning from one, or simply because he wanted to spend time with you.

For seven long years your bond had been growing, becoming stronger and stronger. People became aware of your existence because Humanity’s Strongest was always around you. It was a mystery whatever deal was between you two. Were you friends? Maybe lovers? Or merely another doctor and her patient? You heard all sorts of wild rumours making you laugh. Oh, how people liked to tell made up stories.

The truth was, you loved him. You loved him like you’d never loved anyone before. You’d been friends all this time, and you didn’t really feel the need of telling Levi, or doing something about it. You two were close, so close you knew a side of him no one else did. You knew Levi’s soft side. Levi wasn’t the kind of person who didn’t express his feelings through words, but actions. He’d sit next to you or stand really close to you, wrap his arm around your shoulders, he’d let you play with his hair, or with his hands; more impressively the pats on your head had evolved to cupping one of your cheeks with his hand and make eye contact for several seconds. This physical closeness told you how Levi felt about you, however, he didn’t address it either.

Before the sun was completely set, you were cleaning after another emergency, when a soft knock on the door distracted you both. You answered the door, and found Erwin standing tall behind the door. You let him in, as he greeted you with his friendly smile and small questions like how you were, how was Pascal doing, if you were up to something new, updates. 

“Levi. didn’t expect you to be here” He said looking at his friend.

“Erwin” Was Levi’s only response.

“Would you mind giving me a moment with Y/N? My health is something that stays between me and my doctor”

“No problem” He said standing up from your chair behind your desk and leaving.

“I don’t have any health issues at the moment, actually I came here just to talk, I wasn’t expecting to find Levi here…You two are quite close, aren’t you?” Erwin began.

“Yeah…”

“You see, Levi is known for being...well, Levi. He’s cold, straightforward and pretty stoic most of the time, I am amazed by how relaxed he seems when he’s around he. I’d go as far as to say that he seems...well...I’ve never seen him this happy. There’s nothing between you two, right?” You shook your head.

“Are you implying that Levi likes me?” You asked, knowing the answer, but you wanted to hear it from someone else.

“I’m pretty sure he does. Do you like him?” Erwin’s blue eyes met yours, as you hesitated for a bit before answering.

“Yes, I do...he keeps me company when I’m busy, he walks me home when it’s late, he’s done so much for me, he makes me feel comfortable and safe. I really do like him”

“Well, I hope it works out for you guys” He had a small smile of satisfaction, feeling genuinely happy for his friend.

“You said you’d come here to talk. And I’m pretty sure it’s not about Levi and me. About what exactly did you want to talk?”

“I’d like you to join the team of doctors and nurses who attend soldiers”

“I already attend soldiers”

“A doctor of the military. In Wall Sina. You’ll have a better payment, and a bigger house there…”

Your eyes widened in awe from hearing Erwin’s proposal.

*

“Don’t do it” Levi said as soon as you finished telling him what Erwin and you discussed earlier in the clinic. He took a sip of his tea as you stared at him confused. You’d expect him to have any other reaction but this one. He looked at you, knowing what your thoughts were. “You’re a great doctor. You’d be a great acquisition to the military. But your talent would be wasted in Wall Sina”

“Why?”

“Nothing ever happens inside Wall Sina. You’ll go from attending real wounds and rare illnesses to attend splinters in people’s fingers or cuts from broken porcelain. The biggest kind of emergency you’ll get a pregnant woman whose water just broke...You’re smarter than that, you deserve more challenging cases”

You exchanged stares, thinking how right he was. Inside Wall Sina everything was...well...less chaotic, people had better lives, didn’t seem to have much less problems. At least not as much as people in Trost did.

“Besides” he continued “The only soldiers who constantly need medical attention are the survey corps. I get where Erwin’s proposal comes from. You’re his friend, Pascal is practically your kid now, you’re a talented doctor, and he want you to have a better life...but you’re too good to have your knowledge rot inside Wall Sina. If you ask me, I’d like you to join the survey corps. Not as a soldier, as a doctor. We lose many soldiers because they can’t make it to the walls, if we had a doctor with us, maybe we wouldn’t lose as much soldiers as we do…”

You remained gawking, not expecting any part of that conversation. Levi had just asked you to join him, to go with him outside the walls.

“Do you want me to come with you?” You mouthed

“Did you not hear what I just said? Yes, I want you to come with me” He said emphasising that last part, making your heart stop for a second. 

You couldn’t answer at first. You had too many thought trains going all at once, they all made you dizzy. You wanted to meet the world outside the walls, but titans were dreadful creatures. You’d love to go with him, but, you didn’t know how to use ODM gear, or how to use a blade other than a scalpel. This would just fuel all those rumours about you and Levi.

“Y/N, so?” Levi broke the silence pulling you back from your thoughts.

“Oh, Levi, I’d love to go with you…”

“But?”

“I’m going to be a burden, am I not?”

“Don’t be ridiculous”

“I have zero fighting skills, if I see a titan I’ll probably shit myself right there, also I don’t know how to use the ODM gear. I’m not a very skilled person when it comes to being on my feet”

“You won’t need fighting skills. I do need to teach you how to use the ODM gear. When we’re outside the walls, as long as you stay close to me, I’ll promise you you’ll be fine. I won’t let anything happen to you, and if someone  or something harms you, I’ll make sure they don’t see a new dawn”

His eyes were locked on yours, telling you how he meant every word he’d said. He’d be protecting you. That was the closest declaration of love you’d gotten from him since you met. Your heart was beating faster now, louder, and it only got worse the longer his grey eyes were on yours.

*

“She’ll be attending the survey corps” Levi said, looking through Erwin’s window. “We’d lose a lot less soldiers if we had a doctor giving medical attention as soon as we need it. And she’s perfect for that job”

“You know what it implies to take someone like her out of the Walls, right?”

“Like her?” Levi said, clearly not amused by how Erwin referred to you, something Erwin immediately regretted as soon as he spoke, realising he’d sounded aggressive.

“Someone inexperienced. Someone who isn’t part of the military” Erwin corrected.

“You wanted her to become a MP doctor, how is this any different?” His gaze was cold and sharp.

“The outside, the titans, that sort of danger”

“I want her to be a part of my squad. If she’s riding with my team, I can ensure her safety” Levi looked away, speaking slowly, clearly, and confident in his skills, maybe this facade would convince Erwin.

“You love her, don’t you Levi?” His question grabbed Levi by surprise, as he glared at his friend.

“What does this have to do with what I just said?” He hissed.

“Answer me” Erwin’s voice wasn’t firm, not like when he gives orders.

“Is it really relevant?” Levi questioned, his voice decreasing.

“Please” Erwin begged.

“I do, alright?” He snapped, glaring at his superior for making him admit it to someone else who wasn’t him.

“You know how much you’re risking her life by taking her out of the walls?”

“I know, but I’d never let anything happen to her” His face softened.

“If something happens to her...”

“I will not let anything happen to her. Worst case scenario that it does, it’ll be my cross to bear.”

“What about Pascal?” Erwin asked.

“If something happens to Y/N, I’ll take ful responsibility for the kid, at least until he becomes of age”

“What about the meantime? I’ll let you take her, but there’s no way I’m letting that kid leave. If he were part of the training corps it’d be a different story, but he isn’t”

“He can stay. Y/N’s mentor works in the clinic with her, he can keep teaching Pascal medicine, and the brat is perfectly capable on living on his own, he’s smart, he’ll deal with it without much problem”

“Okay then. If she wants to, then she can join you. Also Levi, don’t let your feelings get in the way” Erwin said, making Levi’s eyes met his once more.

“As long as she’s safe, that won’t happen” His grey eyes looked into Erwin’s, a fire burning in them. 

“Alright, I trust you...” 

*

There was something different in the air. It was hard to tell what was it. The usual chattering of people as they walked through the streets, echoing inside the clinic. White noise. Now gone. Completely gone for several long seconds. And it was before that deadly silence turned into commotion. It became a pandemonium all of a sudden. People began running, crying, yelling, all at once, distracting you from your paperwork, and making you run towards the main door. As you stepped into the streets, you saw it.

Your heart stopped at once, your blood turned stone cold. You saw it, standing tall behind the wall, looking down at everyone else as they all could smell death in the air.

~

Tags:  @crazyliraz

[lovesquareshippingtrash]

Chameleon Reaction

An episode that had the fandom up in arms before it aired based on its preview. But did any of it matter?

(Warning: LONG POST. Spoilers below the cut)

I mean you know it didn’t.

So we start straight off with the scene from the preview clip. Marinette is excited to find that many people have swapped seats. From the explanation we’re given, this was a plan made before that school day. So why didn’t anybody tell Marinette about it, especially when the changes affected her more than anyone else, moving her to the back of the class to sit by herself? None of the people actually involved in the plan felt like volunteering then, huh?

Let’s talk about Marinette’s reaction to Lila and everything else going on here. She is a little aggressive towards Lila, pointing out the holes in her story, but she never makes a comment suggesting that she shouldn’t be able to sit at the front. All Marinette asks is why she should have to sit at the back. She’s pretty loose on the details, so it’s hard to read much into what the actual complaint would be there beyond literally not wanting to sit at the back of the class. She says nothing about sitting by herself, and while we could read into her not wanting to be separated from her friends (which is most likely how her classmates take it), I think if someone genuinely needed to be at the front, Marinette would gladly volunteer to move.

This is Marinette. We’ve all seen Copycat and Volpina. We know what this is about. This is about Lila lying. The show has gone to painstaking lengths to show Marinette hates lying. Which would be all well and good, a strongly developed piece of characterisation... except we’ve just had the season 2 finale. We’ve just had Catalyst & Mayura, where the major plot thread in Marinette’s civilian life was her LIE about having a grand picnic prepared for the whole school. And she decided to try to work hard to make it not a lie, and the class forgave her, but we have just had a TWO PARTER that had a plot thread about Marinette lying for no reason other than saving face in front of Chloé. She could have just accepted that people thought her good deed was a little weak - although of course, her classmates would no doubt have remember all of her many good deeds that she does for them constantly, as Adrien pointed out at the end. Marinette just told a giant lie for the most meagre of reasons, and in the multipart story you’d think they’d build on this, have it be an identity crisis for Marinette - but this is Miraculous. We don’t get that level of depth. We aren’t even shown Marinette’s apology - just everyone accepting it and moving on.

This is supposed to be about Chameleon, not Heroes’ Day. The point is, after just giving us a story in which Marinette tells a pointless lie without her suffering any repercussions, ever being expected to make amends, and in which her hatred for lying is directly highlighted by her interactions with Lila, how are we ever expected to care about this part of Marinette’s character again?

Moving on. The already infamous moment of everyone turning to Marinette, featuring Adrien’s absurd look of disgust that is, apparently, an animation error. I’m not concerned about that though. What I am concerned about is the gasps of horror from the rest of the class in that moment. Lila offers to give Marinette her seat - but Marinette never asked her to do that. She never said Lila should have to move, only complained that she should. She didn’t accept Lila’s offer, either. I can understand the class looking at Marinette for her reaction, but they acted like Marinette personally gave Lila tinnitus right there. The reaction was totally uncalled for, and is SUCH an easy audio fix to drastically improve the entire episode. People’s problem with this story going in was the idea that Marinette’s friends would turn against her so easily, and it’s such an easy fix that changes the story in no way to turn that around.

Brief aside (boy I really didn’t think this post would be this long already, sorry...); this episode seems to be setting up Lila to be Marinette’s every day antagonist now that Chloé is getting her redemption. How great would it be if Chloé, trying to be nice and deciding that after what Marinette has done for her lately she dislikes Lila more than she dislikes Marinette, Chloé stood up for her? She could be the one to point out that Jagged has a crocodile, not a kitten. But, of course, again, that would require character and relationship development, and we wouldn’t want that now, would we... Still, with the set up for Lila to be Marinette’s every day villain, maybe this will happen later. It’s notable that Chloé doesn’t have a line in this episode; she’s never fawning over Lila here, even when Sabrina is, and we get no indication that Chloé wants to be her friend, unlike in Volpina. But I digress...

Marinette proves how much better than all of this she is, however, by calming down enough by herself to resist the akuma before it could reach her.

Lunchtime. Nino glosses over Marinette’s story about Lila being a liar to point out the flaw in Marinette’s behaviour. And sure, it wasn’t a great choice, but seriously? And then Alya decides she’s a journalist first and a friend second. Of course, Marinette’s counter here should be that she was in the park and heard Ladybug calling Lila out, but it’s fair that she wouldn’t think like that in the moment - of course, she didn’t overhear that, she said it. Alternatively, Adrien could have popped up here to support Marinette, but we gotta have DRAMA.

Not sure why we should expect any of Marinette’s classmates to think about anything at all, however, because first they think nothing of Lila failing to react in pain until after Marinette speaks, and then they fall for her utter nonsense about the terrible dangers of particularly soft paper. Yeah, Myléne and Kim then yell at Marinette like she’s an enemy instead of just expressing disappointment in her out of character action like a friend, but what does that matter any more. The class aren’t being allowed to have any independent thought in regards to Lila.

Now we get to talk about something that the episode does really well! Hooray! Adrien’s interaction with Lila in the locker room is great. He knows Lila is lying, but when not transformed he has a cool head. He doesn’t know the depths of Lila’s vindictiveness. As far as he can tell, she’s a compulsive liar who could be brought around, not someone who will say whatever it takes to get what she wants. He won’t just blindly trust her after what has happened, but he has such a good heart, he wants to help. Even after Lila throws it back in his face, he’s still willing to help her.

Then Marinette (with Tikki’s encouragement) resists the akuma again, because she is also wonderful. Between this and Zombizou, Hawkmoth should really be getting suspicious about her.

Lila’s response to the akuma is fantastic. Not only being unafraid, but straight up grabbing it out of the air, and then HER giving the introductory spiel back to Hawkmoth. That’s just great. A bit weird that she acts like he wouldn’t remember her after specifically calling on her a second time, and weird that he acts like it’s a big deal that he remembers her. But that’s so minor. It’s also just so thematically strong that, once again, Lila’s powers are based on being fake, this time lying about herself rather than what’s around them.

Plagg decided that Adrien needs an enchanted kiss is such a WONDERFUL moment, it’s so out of the blue, such a diversion, and it’s hilarious. Whoever wrote that scene, assuming they didn’t write the rest of the episode, give them a raise. We need more moments like that.

Cat Noir once again taking the hit for Ladybug and being taken out of the fight. This episode definitely need to have Ladybug be the one in the fight, but one day I just wish they’d let Cat Noir take the spotlight.

A good villain is one who doesn’t just lose or fail for the sake of it. Lila had the opportunity to get a Miraculous, but chose not to due to her own personal feelings about Ladybug. That’s great. What’s not great is that Hawkmoth doesn’t try a similar akuma with a more obedient host.

Frankly, the whole actual fight is great. One thing at which this show always excels is its choreography. The defeat of Chameleon is just sublime, one of the better take-downs of a villain in the entire show. But HOW does Cat Noir not react to Ladybug’s pun here?? Miraculous is always so rushed, especially towards the end of episodes, not letting us have little character moments like that.

Nino completely falling apart without his hat is ridiculous. Alya being more concerned about him falling apart than anything to do with Marinette here is so much more so.

And now we get to the resolution. If Miraculous is bad at its openings, it is appalling at its resolutions.

Hawkmoth gives a speech about how Lila will still help him like this isn’t the third time he’s akumatised her. The specifics of this plot and the dialogue here strongly hint at the setup for Lila to ultimately see Ladybug actually akumatised, but we’ll see if that pays off. One of my predictions for this season going in was that Lila would essentially gain the ability to call on her akuma at will to become Volpina and fight as a recurring enemy in the field. But that would, of course, be far too much of a shake up to the status quo.

Adrien talks to Marinette about Lila! They’re able to talk about how they both know Lila lies. Adrien helps Marinette to understand why what she’s doing won’t help, and able to help Marinette grow as a person! This is great! Already more than I expected to get here! Good start! From how everyone else is acting with Lila, it seems like they might not be apologising any time soon, unfortunately, but Adrien letting Marinette know he’s on her side is good.

And you know, I wouldn’t have been surprised if that had been it. I wouldn’t have even minded that ending. But then THEY RAMP IT UP. First, Adrien gives Marinette such a LOOK. A seeing-her-in-a-whole-new-light kind of look. Of course, he’s given her some similar looks before, I’m definitely not expecting it to mark a change in their interaction. But it makes for great gif/photoset material, you’ll certainly see it on this blog soon.

Then he goes the next step and MOVES TO SIT WITH HER! YES! Adrien ensures that Marinette won’t be left on her own, making a physical statement that he is literally on her side. He makes clear to Marinette both that he is proud of her, and that he is happy to be at the back, giving us a spectacular new status quo set up.

Things seem great! So, of course, we can’t expect it to last. Marinette misses her name on the register, but it hardly seems like her fault, no doubt she’s just confused because Miss Bustier is reading names off in a completely random order. It’s a shame, in Stoneheart the register was read out in proper order; Agreste, Bourgeois, Bruel. But for some reason here it’s going Rossi, Agreste, Kanté, Dupain-Cheng.

Now I’m not sure if Miss Bustier genuinely thinks Marinette couldn’t hear, or she’s using that as an excuse because she knows Marinette is distracted by Adrien - but she was utterly clueless about the social dynamics earlier in the episode. A teacher wouldn’t move a student for mishearing something literally once after they’ve said there’s no issue. If it repeated, yes, but not once.

Still, as disappointing as this is, Marinette being forced to sit beside her enemy could be inte-

OH SORRY COULDN’T FINISH THE SENTENCE BEFORE THAT POTENTIAL SHAKE UP WAS RUINED. Lila claims her tinnitus is cured. And everyone just accepts it. Seriously? That’s the moment everyone should be looking at her with scrutiny, realising that they’d been duped and they should have trusted their “every day Ladybug” after all. Some actual APOLOGIES offered to Marinette. But they all just ignore it. This show’s refusal to use the word SORRY is just awful.

Now Alya... Alya takes it upon herself to act, finally...

“You didn’t think I’d let my BFF sit all by herself, did you?”

EXCUSE ME!? Yes, we most certainly did think you’d do that, because YOU LITERALLY DID EXACTLY THAT. ADRIEN is the one who made sure things changed, he was the one who decided not to leave her on her own. You made the choice on Marinette’s behalf that she would sit at the back so you could sit with Nino. Miss Bustier vaguely mentions people with vision problems needing to sit closer - except that’s exactly what their glasses are for. I’m a teacher, if we have a kid who can’t see the board we’ll move them closer, but that never happens with kids wearing glasses - typically that’s with kids who need glasses but have lost or broken them. First there was her deciding Marinette was clearly just jealous of Lila being close to Adrien in Catalyst, despite the fact that Marinette was much closer to him and showed in Frozer that she wasn’t ruled by jealousy, now this. Do the writers want us to turn against Alya? I’ve seen a theory going around that this episode was going to set up Marinette and Alya having a major fallout. But Alya acts like there’s no problem, and ONCE AGAIN FAILS TO APOLOGISE.

Adrien is great and moves back to Nino, to again say clearly to Marinette and Lila that he is on Marinette’s side. Frankly, I don’t know why Lila even wanted to sit with him again, she knows he’s wise to her crap. But this is followed by literally everyone going back to normal - and they’re all given closeups like they’re in on some great conspiratorial show of support for Marinette, while NOT. SAYING. SORRY. Cannot stress this enough. So now everything is just the same as it was, except Lila sits next to Nathaniel. We had a potential to mix up character and relationship dynamics, but we can’t have any progression now, can we.

This episode had some excellent moments. Adrien was wonderful, and the akuma fight was great. But it was bookended by utter crap and Marinette’s friends were unbearable. Yes, they’re teenagers, they’re not perfect, but this is a kids’ show. If you want to show something like this, impart a life lesson! Have Tikki point out people change as they grow up, or have everyone apologise and realise their mistake, or SOMETHING. But like I said, this show refuses to offer good resolution or progress of any kind besides new teammates and power ups. Its refusal to bend from its rigid episodic structure with monsters of the week keeps it utterly stagnant, and means that many major plot points get ignored for extended periods - I found it rather jarring that Hawkmoth didn’t have his own actual plot in the episode. No development with Gabriel and Nathalie, no suspicion raised about Marinette.

Of course, the dumbest part about the whole episode is that those benches can EASILY fit at least three people, nobody actually needed to move at all.

As ever, my feelings about all this are just that this show has such great potential, wonderful ideas, and strong characters. But it squanders it all, time after time, and I doubt it will ever change... but that’s why I love this fandom so much; because we take all of that, and turn it into so much wonderful art, so many wonderful stories...

[returntoinocense]

The way you make me feel

Penny Haywood x Slytherin fem!mc warnings: none word count: 2391 a/n: I was gonna make it a one shot, but it might turn into a multipart series, I’m not sure yet. I’m not quite happy with the ending since i’m not that used to flully writing. Then again it was good training :) enjoy and don’t be afraid to send some feed back <3

  The first time you noticed that something had changed with Penny, was on your sixth year, while you were on King’s Cross. She stopped by when she saw you and Rowan talking, before boarding the train. Penny grew into beautiful young woman over the summer; you wouldn’t blame anyone for trying to steal one of your best friends.

  Penny ran to hug you both, the same energy she always had; but something clicked in you the moment you saw her smile. When she hugged you, you clung to her like she was a life line, resting your chin on the top of her head due to the height difference. You had no chance to see her last summer, while you were at Rowan’s farm. You missed Penny so much. At that moment you noticed, your feelings for her were more than just pure friendship, you felt ashamed for some reason.

  Penny went to a different compartment, so you spent the whole trip talking to Rowan. Who at this point was like the sister you never had; trying to distract yourself from the current train of thought you were having. But she was still in the back of your mind. Rowan, who was sitting in front of you, noticed you weren’t the most present in the conversation. She knew you like the palm of her hand.

“Is everything okay Y/N? You seem bothered by something…” concern in plastered her eyes. “Yeah… just a little distracted that’s all” you waved your hand dismissing her concern but deep down you knew. “Well, if you are not ready to talk about it now, we can always talk about it later” she leaned in smiling genuinely, resting her hand on your knee trying to reassure you. “Trust me, it’s nothing, I was just zoning out” you smile at her and she let go of the subject.

  The rest of the trip was quiet. Rowan was reading and you were almost falling asleep on your seat, with a blanket tightly wrapped around you. That was until your compartment door slid open and you jumped from your seat.

“Hey! … sorry” Penny said apologetically once she noticed she startled you both “I missed you guys, and I was getting a little lonely back in my compartment, so I sneaked over here” she lingered at the door frame waiting for invitation. You looked at her from head to toe, blushing. She was wearing high waisted jeans, an oversized mustard cardigan and black and white sneakers. “O-of course” you put your feet down “Come in” you tried to keep your cool as Penny sat next to you.  

  Rowan noticed instantly, you were feeling something for Penny. She was really amused at your flustered state but decided to save you this time. “How was your summer Penny?” she said putting her book down. “It was nice, but I did miss you guys” she put a strand of hair behind her ear “I mean writing and all was fun, but it’s not the same as hanging out” she looked at you and smiled.”Honestly though, I’m a little jealous that you two go to spend summer together”

  Was Penny flirting? No, it must be your imagination, she’s your friend. “Yeah well…” you started, looking down. “It’s not like it was all sunshine and rainbows, you know?” you shyly look at her “We were studying and digging into vault stuff, not to mention” you pointed at Rowan “she was a sweetheart, helping me train for quidditch” you said smiling and Rowan waved you off. “I still have bruises from your so called “training”, Y/N” she looked at you faking a glare, you giggled.   Penny looked at the interaction and grinned “You seem to get along really well” she said with a hint of sadness to it. Still she got comfier on her seat leaning against you, resting her head on your shoulder. “I missed you so much” she said looking down before closing her eyes. You assumed that was directed towards both you and Rowan, you blushed nonetheless.

  Once you got to Hogwarts and after the beginning of the year ceremony; you accompanied Penny to the Hufflepuff dorms. It was on your way to the Slytherin, you told yourself, it wasn’t an excuse to be around her at all. 

“G’night, Pens” you smiled at her. “Good night, Y/N” she stood on her tiptoes to kiss your cheek “By the way, love the hair” she winked and disappeared into the Hufflepuff dorm.   You normally had your hair short but you decided to grow it out over the summer. The fact that Penny just complimented it made your hair beat faster. You stood there pressing your hand on the cheek Penny kissed, flustered and looking off into space. That was till Rowan came by and waved a hand in front of your face. “Hello… earth to Y/N, everything okay?” she looked at you confused. You grabbed her hand and run to the Slytherin common room “We need to talk!”

  In the common room, Rowan was just staring at you confused as ever. “Y/N, are you going to tell me already, or are you going to leave me hanging” she rested her hands on her waist.   You looked at her running your hand through your hair. “Rowan…” you look at her pleading “I think I’m gay…. “ Rowans first reaction was shock, but the second she saw your pleading expression, she burst out laughing. “It’s not funny, you dork, this is serious” you punched her arm lightly. “Ouch” she held her arm as if it hurt “I give, I give” she rests her hand on your shoulder reassuringly “So what made you come to that conclusion?” she said sarcastically as if she already knew. “I think I have a crush on Penny” you said defeated. Rowan smiled. “Yeah, you are not subtle at all, Y/N” she giggled. “Rowan you are not helping! She’s our friend and I’m pretty sure she’s not into girls” you said with a panicked expression as you saw Merula waking in the common room. “Maybe we can continue this conversation somewhere else” Rowan said grabbing you by the arm and pulling you to your sheared room, closing the door behind her. “Look, if I’m honest with you” she sat down on her bed kicking her shoes off “I think you should talk to her about it, you never know if you never ask” You look at her with fear and sadness, written all over your face and she continues. “Don’t tell her you have a crush on her right away. I mean you know, ask her what kind of person she’s into, or like if she has a crush on someone.” she looks at you puzzled “Do you really not know? After all the time you spent with her over the years?”   You sigh, defeated, and dramatically fall back on your bed, putting your hands over your head “It’s not like, I don’t know. It’s more like I’m not sure. We did talk about it, but never that much, it was more about potions and stuffs that she only opened up to me.” “Alright, tell you what” Rowan walked over to your bed and sat next to you resting her hand on your knee “I tell Penny that you need to talk to her, so you can show her what a good catch you are” she smiled tapping your knee.   You sat and looked at her “Are you serious right now? A second ago, I was in a gay panic and you tell that you are going to talk to her so she talks to me? Rowan I love you, but I don’t think you are understanding the situation, what if she never talks to me again?” At that she hugged you, you hugged back. “You are over thinking it. That’s not going to happen, Y/N. She’s your friend and it’s not like you are proposing to her” she giggled and you hugged her tighter. “I don’t know what I’d without you”

 The next few weeks were kind of a pain for you. At your request, Rowan didn’t say anything to Penny, so you never talked to her about it. You’ve been avoiding Penny with really dumb excuses, as Rowan and Ben said. If it wasn’t a quidditch practice or game celebration, you needed study with Rowan or prevent Tulip and Tonks from pulling another prank. She was always in the back of your mind, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to talk to her.

  You were a mess around her; you don’t know why now you can’t keep your cool. It’s not like you just met her, you knew this girl for years and you know things that most don’t know about her. So why hesitate? You decided that, since you can’t face her directly, and you didn’t want to prolong this any longer, that you’ll send her an owl. You tried to write a long letter trying to explain everything but decided against it. She deserves more than that so you wrote a short kind of notice like letter, in a jokingly serious tone that you knew she’d catch instantly.

  Penny was in the great hall reading a book on potions, when a familiar owl landed gracefully in front of her with a letter. She caressed the own and gently took the letter. Instantly, she recognized the beautiful handwriting and smiled to herself.

Dear Penny:

I’ve never meant for us to be distant,

Please forgive me.

I have a lot to tell you and it is imperative, that I do so in person.

I’m waiting by the lake.

Please be here at your soonest convenience.

Wear something comfortable.

Yours truly, Y/N.

  Penny giggled at the way you wrote the small notice; she knew how you used that “serious” writing as a way to lighten the mood. She closed her book and made her way to the Hufflepuff common room, to get a change of clothes.

  Meanwhile, the wind was making it hard for you to stay still in one place. Your hair was up in a messy bun. Around your neck, the scarf that Rowan’s mom gave you for your 16th birthday. You were wearing jeans, the worn boots you loved and a leather jacket to fight off the wind.   You were pacing at shore, throwing rocks into the lake trying to make them bounce; going over everything you were going to say to there for the eleventh time. Mentally preparing yourself for rejection. You heard footsteps and turn over to the noise, noticing Penny walking slowly and kind of hesitant towards you, with her hands in the pockets of her jacket. She was wearing a light blue beanie, the jacket let you see a hint of the mustard cardigan you remembered, from the first time you saw her this year. You grinned and let her get closer. “Hi stranger” she said with a smile on her voice. “Hey…” you said hesitant. “You wanted to talk?” she said closing the distance a little. “Yeah, but I think it’s best if we take a little walk around the lake if that’s okay with you, it’s kind of windy” you said with a sad grin. “Alrighty” she said cheerful as ever. She slid her arm under yours entwining them. “Let’s go”

  You walked for a while in comfortable silence. Till you were ready to talk again. “Penny…” you began looking forward, “I’m sorry for becoming distant the last few weeks” you said with sadness, you didn’t want to be apart from Penny “I’ve been dealing with a lot and I didn’t know how to handle it” you stopped on your tracks and looked at Penny. “That’s alright, I knew you’ll come around” she rubs your arm reassuringly “I’m not mad at you, you are one of my best friends and you know me better than anyone” she smiles sincerely. “And that’s why I was afraid to talk to you about it” you looked down fighting off the tears “I don’t want to ruin what we have” you look at her. “Awn, come on Y/N, we’ve know each other for so long, what could possibly ruin our friendship?” she said reassuringly. “I like you” the words fell heavy from your mouth “and not just in a friend kind of way” you wait for the rejection to come like a slap to the face. You stand still ready for it, but it never comes. Penny let go of your arm and jumped hugging you, pulling you down by the back of your neck. She kissed your cheek close to your lips. “I like you too, you have no idea how long I’ve been trying to woo you” she giggles. You look at her confused and make some space to look at her. “You were?” you raise an eyebrow “since when did you have a crush on me?” You ask, puzzled at the smile she’s giving you. “I realized over the summer while we were writing each other letters, I dropped hints in the lasts ones” she looks at you tilting her head to the side “Did you really not notice? Not even on the train?” you look down, trying to think about every signal you missed, like the oblivious dork that you are. You rested you forehead on hers. “I’m really bad at this, am I not?” you said smiling. “Yeah but…” she leans in, your noses were touching each other “you can fix it” she smiles. You take the hint and close the distance, kissing her. At first it was chaste, her lips were soft and a little chapped thanks to the cold. You felt her and run through your messy hair and you pulled her impossibly closer. Soon soft kisses turned hungry, she playfully bit your lip and you giggled, going back for another kiss. That’s when you realized you were screwed. You knew you will never going to get enough of her. Her tongue slid in your mouth exploring, you let her tongue dance and caress yours. Soon you both needed air, so you broke the kiss and looked at her amazed and relieved. “Will go on a date with me?” you said smiling. Penny gave you a peck on the lips and grabbed your hand entwining your fingers. “I’d love to”.

[babywarg]

ironstrange multipart fic: Settling for a Miracle [6/?]

Chapter Summary: Stephen stops drawing power from the Dark Dimension a second time, out of concern for a friend with something to hide. Things are said over the phone.

Chapter Notes: Still takes place during Avengers: Age of Ultron. Man, a lot of things happen during that show!

Originally on AO3.

“...Stephen?”

When Stephen drifted back to attention, he found Christine’s hand on his.

Christine was seated beside him at a table in the hospital cafeteria, while Christine’s on-call neurologist, Nic West, sat across from the two of them, and was staring at him expectantly.

“Were you even listening, Stephen?” Nic demanded. “I mean, you know, it’s no big deal, it’s just a human life we’re talking about here.”

“Of course he was listening,” Christine retorted, doing her best to sound like she believed it.

Stephen gripped Christine’s hand momentarily, before releasing it. She withdrew her hand, satisfied with the acknowledgement.

“Okay. Sorry, Nic.” He passed a hand over his brow. “Truth is, I didn’t get enough sleep last night. It’s messing with my concentration.”

Nic didn’t seem impressed, or convinced. “You’re going into surgery like that?”

“Nic,” Christine again. Her voice was firmer this time. Nic rolled her eyes at her.

(Stephen understood. “Tired” was never an excuse among his colleagues. It was a mild gripe, at best, but never a way to get out of things.)

“I’ve gone into surgery in worse states, my patients still made it out of the operating theatre minus their tumors.” It was a bad, bad argument to make, but Stephen was in knee-jerk defense mode and was in no mood to keep his mouth in check. “Look...I’ll take a look at his records and get back to you. I just can’t be pressured into giving an opinion right now.”

“Yeah, guess that’s the best we can hope for.” Nic glared at Stephen. “It’s funny, though - back in the day, you gave your opinion whether or not it was solicited.” He stood, sighing loudly. “Next time, I’m consulting with someone who gives a shit.”

Nic left without another word. Stephen let him go, feeling like he deserved to be walked out on.

He stood to leave. Christine stood and kept pace with him.

“You do give a shit,” she said quietly to him. “We both know this. So what’s going on?”

“It’s nothing.” He was aware that he sounded as tired as he felt.

“If it’s a problem with a patient, you can tell me.”

“It’s not.”

“Or with the super-secret Stark project?”

Stephen mirthlessly chuckled. “I’m fine, Christine. I just haven’t had enough sleep.”

Christine stopped him from walking by laying a hand on his shoulder.

“Stephen, I hope I know you well enough for you to let me say this,” she said in the same low, careful voice, “but something’s been different about you these past few months. You’ve changed for the better, for the most part. I think you’ve met somebody.”

Stephen scoffed, “I think I’d know if that were the case...”

“But have you?”

Stephen held his tongue.

“Met” isn’t quite the right word for it, I’m afraid, Christine. “Thrown together” feels more accurate.

By fate or by something else, I still can’t tell.

Christine sighed, took her hand off his shoulder. “Okay, you don’t have to tell me. I just want you to know...if this person ever gives you something to lose sleep over, you can talk to me.”

She sounded so sincere. Of course she did. Christine never faked affection.

“I can always talk to you, Christine,” he said to her with a smile. “Thank you.”

He was about to say more, but his cell phone rang. He took a look at the display.

Tony.

“Gotta take this,” he said apologetically.

“Go for it.” Christine punched him lightly in the arm. “Make sure to tell them they’re answerable to me.”

She left Stephen’s side to check up on some of her patients recovering in the wards nearby.

Stephen accepted the call.

“Hi, I’m returning a call from Dr. Stephen Strange, genius neurosurgeon and future hottest piano bar player in New York?”

“Very funny.” Tony sounded fine: a fact for which Stephen was genuinely thankful. “Sorry about that, Tony. I think I butt-dialed you at around 2 AM this morning. Fell asleep with my phone on my bed and rolled over on it by accident.”

“Is that all? Good. I was afraid you were partying too hard without me, got wasted, fell into a gutter somewhere and needed someone to drag you out.”

Also funny. They’d mutually agreed that they were done with their share of hard partying. They were seasoned professionals; there were more productive ways to get their adrenaline fix.

“Actually, it’s a good thing you called,” Tony continued before Stephen could speak. “I wanted to tell you I’ll be heading back to New York soon, but I may not be coming back to the apartment. Something came up. I’ll be staying in the Avengers Tower until it’s done.”

Stephen had to admit to himself he was mildly disappointed, but he decided not to let on. “Not a problem. I have my hands full here with new patients, too. I guess our research will have to be stalled a bit longer?”

“Yeah...I think that’s going to have to take a backseat. What I’ve got on my hands now - much, much more important.”

He recognized that confidence - it was the same as the one Tony employed when speaking to him about his med-tech projects.

Whatever this new project was, Tony was fired up over it. It must really be huge.

And, Stephen guessed: Tony wasn’t up to discussing the dream with him. In that case, he wasn’t in a position to push.

Thanks for robbing me of sleep for nothing, douchebag, he thought fondly. Keep this up, and I'm telling Christine on you.

“Wish I could say you’re welcome to visit,” Tony continued, “but I can’t promise I’ll be able to entertain you. This thing is probably going to take up all of my waking hours.”

Christine passed Stephen by, on her way to another ward. As she caught his eye, she pointed to the back of her wrist, as if pointing to a wristwatch.

Stephen nodded at her and waved distractedly to show he understood.

“But I’ll definitely, definitely want to see you when I’m done. In a few days. I hope you’ll free up your schedule.”

“Sure thing,” he said, still looking after Christine to make sure he hadn’t missed any more non-verbal cues. “Let me know when you’re available, and take care of yourself. Lots of water, no skipping meals. Love you.”

As soon as the last two words left his lips, his hand shot up to cover them.

His eyes went wide.

His face started to slowly, thoroughly grow hot and red.

“What?” the voice on the other end of the line was tickled pink. “Say again? I missed that last part.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

He’d hissed the words out. He was blushing. He was painfully aware of it. He hid his face from people passing by even if he didn’t know them.

There was a loud, hearty laugh on the other end of the line.

“Okay, then, guess I’ll just drink the water and not skip the meals.” Tony’s voice held a happy lilt. “Love you, too. Asshat.”

Any hyperventilation that was starting in Stephen was arrested by the casual tone with which those words were spoken.

He replied with a grateful chuckle.

Then he ended the call, to spare both of them any further awkwardness.

Stephen wondered if, on the other end of the line, Tony was blushing, just like he was.

He rather liked thinking about that. He’d seen Tony blush, after all. Under more considerate lighting.

He took a moment to compose himself after the call. Then he went off to prep for the upcoming surgery. There would be time to bask in this game-changing moment later.

It was amazing, how a few minutes on the phone with Tony could turn his whole day around.

He’d been feeling light-headed from lack of sleep earlier. Now, after that one call, he was wide awake and ready for anything.

***

“So you carry this over to here,” Stephen droned, “and when you’re done, you - Peter, are you listening?”

The boy’s mind was clearly far away. Stephen had brought it back to earth with those simple words.

“Huh?” Peter’s hand had been propping up his chin. He brought down that hand guiltily. “Oh...sorry, Dr. Strange. Yeah, I was listening. I swear.”

The irony did not escape Stephen; he’d been too distracted to listen to Nic West earlier in the day. Peter being similarly listless now must be some sort of karmic payback.

“In that case, please show me how to balance this equation, per what I just said.”

Peter made a show of knitting his brows in concentration. Approximately 24 seconds of pretense later, he wrote down the correct answer on the practice sheet.

But the thing was, Stephen hadn’t even taught him how to do the equation correctly yet.

In short, Peter didn’t really need a tutor.

Stephen put down his pen.

“Peter,” he said in a low, serious voice, which he hoped did not sound threatening, “I want you to tell me what’s really going on.”

Peter Parker stared at his brand-new science tutor with alarm and trepidation. Like a deer in headlights.

“I-I don’t know what you mean, doc,” he said softly. He folded his arms over his chest protectively - a move that, unexpectedly, reminded Stephen very much of Tony. “Did - did I do it wrong? Maybe we can go through it again? I’m sorry, I drifted off a bit back there. I know you’re trying your best, but science is just - “

“Is someone hurting you?”

Peter’s motor mouth stopped abruptly, and Stephen made a sincere effort to sound gentler.

“Maybe someone at your school? A bully, or an authority figure, someone you trust...”

“No,” Peter quickly answered. “Why - why would you think someone was hurting me? Do I look - do I come across as someone who was...hurting?”

“Not exactly,” was Stephen’s straightforward answer. “If anything, you look...like you’re in better shape. And more confident. Like whatever had been hurting you before, had stopped hurting you all of a sudden. But something’s bothering you, and I’d like to understand.”

As Peter scrambled for an answer, Stephen took stock of what was right in front of him:

Peter was always a gangly boy, initially fated to grow lanky and thin, like someone Stephen knew (he’d gone through his own high school years teased for having a “giraffe neck,” among other hurtful things).

But this current Peter seemed...different. Bulkier.

Stephen always did his best to stay up to date on the newest medical technologies. And, as far as he knew, a child didn’t change from a thin frame to a well-muscled one nearly overnight. Not even with Stark tech.

Maybe Peter had been secretly going to the gym? Taking vitamin supplements, protein shakes?

Or...worse?

It would make sense if he had a health problem: that would mean Peter came to Stephen simply because he needed a doctor. An expert who would be able to tell him if he was taking drugs that weren’t good for him.

It made him feel a bit sad. He’d accused Tony once upon a time of wanting to get close to him just because he wanted a personal physician. Tony had shot him down.

Now here was a young man who was, by all appearances, doing exactly that.

Stephen brushed the disappointment aside. He was not inclined to refuse help, if he could give it. He was going to help Peter however he could.

“Pain’s an old friend, Peter,” he assured the boy. “I can tell you’re in pain. I just need to understand what kind of pain it is and how you got it. You can trust me.”

Upon hearing this, Peter clammed up, quite visibly. Stephen hoped that meant he had gotten to the heart of the matter.

“I...” He wanted to talk. Stephen could tell that he did. He wanted to trust Stephen, very badly.

But in the end, he chose not to.

“...I have to go, Dr. Strange. It’s late. May’s gonna worry.” He gathered his books, notebooks and pens in a clear hurry, stuffed them back into the backpack he’d brought them in. “I’m really sorry. I can’t...maybe next time.”

He all but fled Stephen’s apartment.

As he heard the door close, Stephen sighed and leaned back in his chair.

Kids were never his forte. He wondered if perhaps Tony, with his more easygoing air, would have gotten farther with Peter...

Whatever it was that was bothering the boy, it seemed serious. And urgent.

Stephen could only see this one way: if he could do something about it, and he didn’t, he was at fault.

He had to do something.

At the very least, he had to find out what was wrong.

***

So, late that night, when he was sure most everyone else in the immediate vicinity was asleep, he projected his astral form into the Parkers’ apartment.

(It was the second time in a week that he’d had to end the dark ritual to perform a standard spell. Stephen knew the occasion merited it, but he sincerely hoped it wasn’t becoming a habit.)

He’d never been invited into the Parkers’ apartment, and it felt like an intrusion - a necessary one, but an intrusion nonetheless.

The place was...cozy. Cozier than his current residence, certainly. Stephen had always hired designers for his previous homes, but he couldn’t exactly afford one now even if he wanted one...and looking at other people’s apartments was a surefire way to remind himself that he couldn’t DIY his own apartment’s interior worth shit.

His first objective was to check on May. She was peacefully sleeping in her bed. Not that it mattered if she was sleeping or not, because he would remain invisible to her, unless 1) she was psychically sensitive, 2) she was specially trained to detect spiritual anomalies, or 3) Stephen wanted her to see him.

Stephen noticed the framed photo of May and a man on her nightstand. Perhaps her departed husband?

He decided not to think too much about it. Satisfied that May wasn’t going to pose a problem, he moved on to Peter’s bedroom.

There was no one there. The window was open. A light breeze blew through the thin curtain. Had Peter snuck out?

It was past midnight, and an empty bedroom that belonged to a teenager would normally be cause for worry.

But Stephen decided to treat it as an opportunity. He looked around for clues that might lead him to understand what was going on.

On the walls were pretty standard, down-to-earth stuff - vision boards, dream colleges, dream travel destinations, band posters, post-it “notes to self” on a pinup calendar - and in one corner was a janky old-school desktop computer with a CRT monitor.

It didn’t seem like a store-bought model - in fact, it seemed highly customized, made up of very well-used and not-quite-rust-free parts.

Peter built his own computer. Stephen wondered if Tony would be interested to know that.

One of the “notes to self” on his calendar said “Apr 25 - first session with Dr. Strange” and beneath it, in tinier, barely legible scrawl, was: “he’s awesome. if anyone can help, he can. DON’T CHICKEN OUT.”

That wasn’t very helpful. It just confirmed his observation that Peter was hiding something.

As he was thinking, he heard a scratching sound from outside.

It sounded...like something big was making its way along the exterior wall, toward the window.

A window that was seven stories off the ground.

Stephen scowled, stepped back into the shadows on impulse. He knew he couldn’t be seen, but he also knew there was no harm in taking extra precaution, in case the intruder happened to be psychic.

From the shadows, he watched as a human being crawled into the window.

CRAWLED.

Stephen was morbidly fascinated. It reminded him of a horror movie he’d seen once - where a long-haired ghost crawled out of a well, and out of the television screen.

But this wasn’t a ghost. This was a human - a young person - who crawled on hands and knees into the window, up the wall and across the ceiling - then flipped and landed neatly on his feet as if he weighed nothing.

Like a skilled gymnast.

Or an insect.

If this was a thug or a robber, he wasn’t dressed like a typical one. The getup looked like a costume of sorts, with black goggles over the red cloth that covered his entire face. (Could he even see with those?)

He was also carrying a backpack.

The same backpack Peter had carried into Stephen’s apartment earlier.

There wasn’t much Stephen could do as an astral projection. He could move light objects and make himself visible - but that was it.

It occurred to him to spook the intruder off the premises, but he decided to wait and see what he was going to do first.

The intruder, obviously completely unaware that he wasn’t alone in the room, set down his backpack, and took off his mask.

It was Peter.

He didn’t even seem out of breath. Stephen imagined that making one’s way up seven stories and across a ceiling would take a lot out of a person, even a young person like Peter - but the boy showed no sign of tiredness or distress.

It was as if he’d just stepped out, bought something from the store, and come back indoors. No big.

Still wearing his baggy, multi-colored costume, Peter unloaded the contents of the backpack. Most of it were vials of a shimmery, milky liquid that Stephen couldn’t identify on sight.

But Stephen’s first instinct, as a doctor, was to think it was something recreational and not quite legal. It was, after all, snuck into a young person’s bedroom in the dead of night, while his guardian was fast asleep.

Oh, Peter...

But to his relief, Peter showed no signs of ingesting the liquid, or taking it into his body any other way. He had a makeshift device of some sort hidden in a dresser drawer. Peter carefully installed one vial into that device, then just as carefully fitted the device around one of his wrists.

It didn’t look to Stephen like the device had a way of injecting the liquid into Peter’s bloodstream. It looked completely external.

Peter took a deep breath.

“Here goes,” he said softly to himself.

He lifted his arm, palm up, and pointed the device toward a blank spot in his vision board wall.

He bent his wrist backwards and pressed down on a button on his palm with his middle and ring fingers.

(Stephen noticed with some amusement that this gesture was similar to one commonly used by Masters of the Mystic Arts for spellcasting. He doubted Peter knew that, though. It was simply the easiest way to firmly press down on a button on one’s palm.)

A stream of white liquid shot out from the device on Peter’s wrist.

It landed on the wall and formed -

- a web?

Stephen didn’t know how else to describe it. The liquid scattered against the wallpaper and solidified into an intricate pattern that looked very much like a spiderweb.

Impressive.

Peter let out a joyous whoop.

“Oh my God,” Peter whispered breathlessly. “Oh my God, it works! It works, I did it, I -- “

He clamped his hands over his mouth. He jumped up and down in place and soon, around his room, careful not to make too much noise as he celebrated.

Stephen still wasn’t sure what was happening. But he was sure of one thing: Peter definitely didn’t need help with “science and stuff.”

Peter dropped onto his bed, still giddy. He lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling he had just crawled on, breathing hard as the excitement wound down.

Stephen then understood what kind of pain Peter was suffering from:

It was the pain of having to keep a mind-blowing secret to himself.

Peter wasn’t in trouble - not yet, at any rate. He was just dying to tell someone about his newfound powers, but was still a little overwhelmed by them.

Perhaps he was afraid of the repercussions of telling someone - like how his and his aunt’s life would change, how his friends would see him, how his schoolwork might be affected...

How he could be seen as a freak. Something to be feared.

Peter shouldn’t be hurried. That much was clear to Stephen. The boy had to decide for himself whom to tell and when.

But there was one thing Stephen could do to help that along...

He waved his hand once, and a post-it note detached itself from Peter’s wall calendar.

It was the one that said “first session with Dr. Strange.”

Peter jumped up out of bed as soon as the note peeled off. He caught it before it hit the ground.

Stephen’s eyebrow rose. The boy’s senses and reflexes were amped up. Part of his newfound powers, no doubt...

For a long time, Peter stared at the note on his hand thoughtfully.

Stephen had already dropped his hint and learned enough: it was the right time to make his exit.

Peter’s bedroom faded from view. Stephen returned to his tired body and his shaking hands, and willed himself to rest.

***

He would hear about it on the morning news a couple of days later: the top floors of the Avengers Tower suffered major damage from a terror attack that occurred late the previous evening.

Manhattan residents were assured, however, that the terrorists had fled, the city was safe, and that the Avengers were on the case.

Commentators on Stephen’s news feed said it was likely not a simple terror attack. Insiders reported that Tony Stark’s Iron Legion and a deadly "programming bug" were somehow involved, stoking paranoia on the airwaves.

But “terrorists” was all the news would say.

“Need to be out of town again for a few days,” Tony supplied over the phone, sounding snippy and rushed, and even less willing to give out hard facts than journalists were.

“I know the work, Tony,” Stephen answered. “But I hope you also know I can’t help worrying about you.”

“I don’t need you worrying about me. Everything’s fine.”

It was an unexpectedly hostile response. Stephen didn’t answer.

He heard Tony draw in a long breath. He imagined Tony hanging his head apologetically.

“Look. I’m sorry. It’s just...to be honest, things are bad. And I don’t know how they got this bad. It’s pissing me off, but I can’t afford to let it get to me right now.”

“You can’t even tell me how bad things really are, can you.” It was an accusation, and it probably came across to Tony as such.

“Why would I do that?” was the cold response. “If you knew, what exactly can you do about it?”

Oh.

That stung.

Instead of dragging the conversation out into what was likely going to be their first full-blown fight, Stephen decided to end the call as civilly as he could. Though gruff, Tony still sounded somewhat apologetic as he said goodbye.

A few days ago, they had professed their love for each other over the phone.

And then, before they could say the words to each other in person, terrible things happened and suddenly the distance between them became very real.

Tony was off to another life-threatening mission. Another one that Stephen was not welcome to be part of.

And couldn’t be part of, even if he was.

It was amazing, how a few minutes on the phone with Tony could turn Stephen’s whole day on its head.

He had never before felt that way about anyone.

And a part of him was terrified.

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