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caseyqdilla · 2 years ago

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My MS Journey

Hello again! This isn’t a fic like I’ve been posting lately, but I wanted to post about the process that led to my diagnosis. I want to post this not only for myself, but for anyone else that may be going through this as well to hopefully shed light on the process from a perspective that people can relate to better. Being that I would look up what things were that I didn't understand or wanted to know the process beforehand I was usually met with the medical terminology; as smart as I am, when it comes to this kind of stuff I would just prefer it to be in laymen's terms.

So I hope this helps someone that is going through the same thing that I went through. I'm always happy to answer questions to the best of my ability, I will also add a few parts to this as well so it isn't too terribly long.

Sending you love and positivity, the journey is scary but you can do this! You're a badass!

Warnings: mentions of medical procedures, blood mentioned (in the capacity of it being drawn for testing), vision loss/low vision, and anxiety/fear are mentioned.

I hope this has helps someone that may be going through this experience as well. If you have any quesitons concerning MS, understanding your diagnosis, or the process of being diagnosed please reach out to a medical professional. My experiences are only meant to serve as peer support so you can understand the process from a perspective of someone that has already gone through these procedures.

While I haven’t been diagnosed with MS very long, I do have some things that I’ve learned are associated with it. Some are temporary, but there are a few that I’ve come to terms with the very real possibility that it’ll be permanent. The main one that’s been a hinderance that has not been one to go away is Optic Neuritis, for those that don’t know (because I was definitely one that didn’t) Optic Neuritis is swelling of the optic nerve. It sounds painful, but my experience it hasn’t been; it’s mainly been an inconvenience more than anything. There’s things that I used to be able to do that I no longer can or if I do, I have to be extra cautious whilst doing so. It started slow, I was doing haunted tours in Savannah, Ga where I would be able to walk around and tell the history of the beautiful city and make it fun. I noticed that it was more difficult to see out of my right eye when it was dark, it was almost like when there was no light I was basically blind in my right eye; which losing my vision is one of my biggest fears. Since I wore contacts all the time I just thought maybe I needed to take a break from that and wear my glasses, but when it didn’t subside I knew it was time to bring it up to my doctor, hopefully they’d just tell me to not wear my contacts for like a week or two then I’d be cured; wishful thinking on my behalf.

When I went to my primary physician and told them the symptoms the best I could, it’s really hard to describe when you don’t know exactly what’s happening or have any kind of inclination of what it may be. She recommended that I go see a neurologist, which made me super nervous; it made everything feel more serious as I booked an appointment with them. so began the waiting game unfortunately since they were so far booked out, but they had a cancellation so I got in earlier than anticipated. Which made me feel a little better knowing that I would hopefully get answers sooner rather than later. Little did I know, it was just the beginning of a long process a process that I thankfully didn't have to go through alone; knowing my family would be there for me no matter what the outcome would be.

Now there aren't many things that give me genuine fear, anxiety yeah of course; I'm an anxious bitch, but when I found out that Optic Neuritis is a symptom that is commonly associated with MS, I was terrified. All the thoughts I associated with a disease like MS bubbling to the surface and just stayed on my mind all the time as I waited for a test that the neurologist wanted to perform to try to rule out MS.

The very first thing the neurologist had me do was to get an MRI done, which for me meant that I had to prepare for it. What I mean by that is that I had to go and get retainers put in for most of my piercings cause I was afraid of them closing up if I simply took out the jewelry. It's not the worst test, unless you're claustrophobic, which if you are and you have a good team doing your MRI they will give you ways to prepare for it beforehand so that you won't be too uncomfortable. The worst thing for me was the cage they put your head in since they were needing to do a scan of my head.

So the results came back and normally if they're not bad then you get a call just saying, "Hey they're normal so followup in like a month or whatever." (Obviously they're not going to talk to you like that, but you get the picture.) However, I got a call to schedule an appointment to go over my results. He told me that they saw white spots on part of my brain, but I also have a piercing (it's a dermal on my right cheek below my eye) on that side that I was unable to remove so they had to do another test to make to further eliminate or confirm the diagnosis he was suspecting.

The second test that I had to do first was called a provoked potential test, without going into all the medical terminology (because lets face it, I'm not a doctor and will 100% get all that crap wrong). Basically it's a test where you get sensors attached to your head, there's something else they put on you but for the life of me I can't remember what it was, and you have to watch a center focal point on the screen and whenever you see something you push a button on the remote they give you. (Again I could be remembering this wrong and I apologize if I do, I promise you the test sounds daunting cause of the long ass name, but it is quite literally probably the most boring medical test you can take aside from the ADHD test you take at a psychologist's office.) I wanna say I was there for about 2 hours I know they had to redo parts of it a few times cause my hair kept getting in the way and throwing off the sensors.

The last test after that was a lumbar puncture, also quick side note, most of these tests come with a complimentary blood test with them, so there's that too. Also, you can't drive yourself to the test and you can't drive I think it was either 12 or 24 hours after the procedure until the puncture they have to make essentially closes up, they'll tell you all the side effects that are possible as well as precautions, but just so you know especially if you're someone like me that prefers to do things alone. (However, I am extremely happy that my mom went with me because she eased my anxiety so much, just knowing that she was in the other room. They won't let anyone in there with you since its a sterile environment.) So after I got my blood drawn for what seemed like the millionth time, I had to lay on a motorized table so they can adjust for the height, angle, and whatever else they may need to perform the test. Before I got on the table I had to take off my shirt along with my sports bra, and pull my pants down so they access to the base of my spine without me having to get completely nakey (cause it was cold af in that room). You're given one of those flimsy hospital pillows to get as comfortable as you can. Once you're comfortable and they adjusted the table, they'll clean the area with what I assume was iodine given the color that it was on his glove. After the area is clean, they'll go ahead and numb you, I don't think they used an IV or anything; I'm pretty sure it was just a syringe of anesthesia I tried not to pay attention and spoke to the nurse that was in there with me to assist during the procedure the entire time to keep my mind occupied. Much like any procedure when you're needing to be numbed or given any kind of local anesthetic to numb the area but stay awake they'll tell you if you feel any sharp pain to let them know so that they're able to administer more and keep you as comfortable as possible. Sometimes though when you're experiencing something new, your body won't know the difference between pain and pressure; so if you feel anything that makes you nervous or uncomfortable just let whoever is performing the procedure know and normally they will ask you to describe the sensation as best you can so they can better determine 1) where to put more numbing or 2) if you're feeling the sensation of pressure as you're experiencing something new. Once that's all figured out and you're all prepped, they'll insert a guiding tool to allow them access to your spinal column to extract the spinal fluid they'll be testing.

Once they get what they're needing, you'll be patched up, it's like a gauze and surgical tape they put over the opening that they had to create to get the fluid. After you're all patched up they'll give you the instructions letting you know that you essentially can't do a whole lot for the next 12-24 hours until the puncture closes up for fear of some of the fluid leaking out and causing unwanted side effects such as migraines (I can't remember the other ones honestly.)

Then just like the other tests, it's a waiting game once again. Waiting for the results to come back and see if you have the antibodies that are present in MS patients. If you are going through this, I hope and pray that your results are negative; if they're positive though just know that there are some resources out there for you, should you need them.

In conclusion, I fell like I'm writing an essay for a lit class with that start haha, my results came back and I do have those antibodies that are present in MS patients. So after that I was officially diagnosed with MS in November last year. Yeah it was scary, but I think not knowing and things getting worse would have been even scarier.

I would just like to reiterate that if you have any quesitons concerning MS or understanding your diagnosis, please reach out to a medical professional. My experiences are only meant to serve as peer support, so you can understand the process from a perspective that has already gone through these procedures.

#MS #Multiple sclerosis #autoimmune disease #peer support #optic neuritis #lumbar puncture #evoked potential test #Christina Applegate

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inspiredrawaw · 3 months ago

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A Fae’s Magic. My take on how magic works and headcannons

And here we are!! My take on how I imagine the fairies magic working as well as my interpretation of Peris physical disability headcannon. I went with MS due to me getting optic neuritis last year and doing a shit ton of research into MS just in case! And now I get to show that research here! text below

IMAGE 1: A Faes Magic.

a fae get their magic from the Big Wand that gets stored as its own unique "information" in the fae's nervous system. Magic helps a fae's nervous syetm send signals to their wings to move and function as well as enhance the other functions of their nervous syetm. Leading to faster wound healing and immortality, gives them a 6th sense to other magic beings, greater balance and coordination when they change forms, and enhancement to their memory, learning, and thoughts.

big wand magic go into brain, magic becomes signals, magic gets stored in nervous system

IMAGE 2:

now wands, everything must be done in moderation. A wand can help a fae have control over their magic, be more precise in casting magic, and for storing extra magic. Due to this a wand becomes an extension of a fae even to a point where a wand will float with their fae.

A fae will receive a rattle wand at birth due to their immature nervous systems causing large uncontrolled magic outbursts.

IMAGE 3:

As a fae gets older it becomes more difficult to expel that magic. It's easier to control but magic back up becomes a real problem. Similar to how a nervous system can be overloaded with chronic stress, their nervous system can be overloaded with magic. This magic overflow will cause butterfly nausea, rainbow vomit, and a build up of confetti in their lungs and sinuses.

The most common occupation a fae will pursue is as a fairy godparent. Human kids wild imagination is a great way to expel extra magic. People will work in this field for selfish reasons but that's a different problem.

IMAGE 4:

what about our pal Peri? Peri has magical Multiple Sclerosis.

Magical MS or M-MS similar to human MS, the immune system will attack the protective layer on nerve fibers causing communication problems for the nervous system.

This in fae's can cause the magic a fae can store to be decrease overtime. Fae with M-MS have weaker wings typically floating lower then their peers, numbness in limbs, lack of coordination no matter their form, slower recovery time, fatigue, and increased magic back up risk.

helps with magic, coordination, nervous system can’t hold a lot of magic, bad leg gets worse of MMS flareups

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For Peri he first discovered this only a few years prior to the show after getting optic neuritis in their right eye.

Peri switched out his wand for his cane wand. A mobility and magic aid. By enclosing the star of his wand in a sphere it acts as extra storage for his magic decreasing his magic back up risk. It also helps with slowing down the process of his nervous system getting attacked by his immune system to ensure a fae's immortal life. He has an easier time floating and casting magic.

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