#most of these were disguises featured in the film but i did add 2 of my own too!

[not-xpr-art]

Feathers McGraw but make him Pop Art

(01/2025)

andy warhol eat your heart out!!!!

[maxwell-grant]

Any thoughts on Darkman, the Liam Neeson movie? I heard it was originally going to be a Shadow movie.

I love Darkman very much, but I've realized recently that this love comes with some pretty bittersweet feelings at the story behind it.

Michael Uslan: I was going to produce a Shadow feature film with Sam Raimi, but Sam got consumed by back-to-back movies and we ran out of time. We were headed in a good, period piece direction and managed to do so without relying on yet another bout with Shiwan Khan. I later had another major director passionate to do The Shadow, but a person at the company wanted to do a modern day TV series instead, which ultimately did not go... - comment saved from a post in The Shadow Knows Facebook group

For those of you who only now got into The Shadow or don't remember, for much of the early 00s, when The Shadow basically had no current projects and Conde Nast was taking down webpages and fan content left and right, the only things that kept this "fandom" alive were occasional fanfics (many of which are gone now), and the dim light in the horizon that was the rumors that Sam Raimi was finally going to make his Shadow film. Dig back on The Wayback Machine for Shadow web page and you're gonna see this as consistently the only thing they had to look forward to in regards to the character. These rumors floated around for over a decade, at one point Tarantino was even supposed to direct it, but he confirmed in 2013 that it wasn't going to happen. At least, not with him at the helm.

The project has been dead for a while now, and Conde Nast seems to be shuffling around plans for the character, and I deleted my Facebook months ago so I haven't kept up with any news, although it seems the James Patterson novel wasn't received too well, so I'm not sure what other plans they have in the pipeline.

Back in the 1970s, after the release of Richard Donner's Superman and in line with The Shadow's pop culture resurgence, thanks to the paperback reprints and the 70s DC run, there were plans to make a Shadow feature film, and there were quite a handful of scripts being tossed around for the following years (Will Murray states most of them were horrible), several names attached to the project at one point or another. The plans died down a bit following Gibson's death and only really picked up again after the 90s, and of course we all know that the 1994 movie came out with spectacularly bad timing. From what I recall, it seems Sam Raimi wanted to make his Shadow film in the 80s, was unable to secure the rights, and then just made his own version, which would go on to be his first major motion picture.

Even after making Darkman, Sam Raimi still wanted to make The Shadow. I guess that's ultimately the bittersweet part for me. I imagine the current state of Shadow media would be significantly better if Sam Raimi, who was a fan of the character and the pulp version (and even knows of The Shadow's connection to Houdini and stage magic), got to make his Shadow film, years before Blood & Judgment, years before Burton's Batman made it impossible for a Shadow film not to be compared to it, in a time period where it wouldn't have had to compete with The Lion King and The Mask for box office. And second, I have been drawing up my plans for Shadow projects for, what, 5 years now? And I have just barely got my foot off the door as a filmmaker. Sam Raimi had a decade-long career as a cult filmmaker before he got turned down, and decades later, after becoming a household name in charge of Marvel's biggest icon, the project still fell through. It doesn't exactly get my hopes up, y'know.

I love Darkman, it's the best Shadow film that doesn't technically star the real Shadow, and it works pretty well on it's own regardless of that association, but I do get pretty sad looking at it from the outside, because I just can't help but think on what it could have been.

In some aspects I do think the film benefits from not being about The Shadow proper, because it means Raimi got the freedom to do whatever the hell he wanted. The character of Darkman already existed separately from Sam Raimi's plans for a Shadow film, already carrying off the Phantom / Universal Monster influence, and what Raimi did was basically combine the two ideas together.

He took the basic iconography of The Shadow, a terrifying urban crimefighter in coat and slouch hat, and add in other Shadow traits like his mastery of disguise, his disfigurement, and that wonderful scene where he's invisibly running circles around a panicky triggerman while laughing maniacally, a moment which definitely feels like Raimi taking a second to indulge himself to do what you can call The Classic Shadow Scene with a character he's, for the most part, succesfully convinced us (and Conde Nast's lawyers, most importantly) isn't supposed to be The Shadow.

But then he filters these through his own influences and style to make him a new character, so instead of a mysterious mastermind with lots of resources and a enigmatic background, instead he's a disfigured and psychotic scientist with a vengeance against those who made him that way. He's like Night Raven, in the sense that he's built off traits that The Shadow has, but develops them differently to the point he stands on his own as a character. It's The Shadow combined with The Phantom of the Opera, filtered through a 1930s Universal Horror lens, played for greater tragedy and a dash of Evil Dead 2 wackyness.

He hides away in trashed up ruins and bickers with a cat, he has fits of rage that make him endanger innocents, he has a doomed love affair, and sometimes he gets so batshit he gives us hilarious moments like "TAKE THE FUCKING ELEPHANT" and "SEE THE DANCING FREAK! PAY - FIVE - BUCKS! TO SEE THE DANCING FREAK!". Moments that really show why he was such a good fit for Spider-Man despite the liberties he took with the source material.

I think the big thing that helps to make Darkman works as a property in it's own right is also that, ultimately, these influences are ultimately at the forefront of it, and the core of it works on it's own. Darkman is a believable, engaging character in his own right, one who tells a story that would be more at odds with The Shadow proper. 

In some aspects, Darkman tries to be The Shadow, he is forced to become The Shadow by literally picking the clothes off a dumpster after he escapes the hospital, and it's a miserable, wretched existence, in a way rather befitting his status as a legally safe knock-off. He is a creature of nightmare who lost his face and takes on a dozen others to fight crime by turning terror against them, except he is still just a man in the end, and no man was ever supposed to live like this.

Raimi was also inspired by the Universal horror films of the 1930s and 1940s because "they made me fear the hideous nature of the hero and at the same time drew me to him. I went back to that idea of the man who is noble and turns into a monster".

He originally wrote a 30-page short story, titled "The Darkman", and then developed into a 40-page treatment. At this point, according to Raimi, "it became the story of a man who had lost his face and had to take on other faces, a man who battled criminals using this power"

A non-superpowered man who, here, is a hideous thing who fights crime. As he became that hideous thing, it became more like The Phantom of the Opera, the creature who wants the girl but who was too much of a beast to have her

I decided to explore a man's soul. In the beginning, a sympathetic, sincere man. In the middle, a vengeful man committing heinous acts against his enemies. And in the end, a man full of self-hatred for what he's become, who must drift off into the night, into a world apart from everyone he knows and all the things he loves.

For the role, Raimi was looking for someone who could suggest "a monster with the soul of a man"

It's the fact that Darkman is ultimately played for vulnerability and tragedy that really sets him apart. While I wouldn't go far enough to say The Shadow is a man with the soul of a monster, still, the difference in presentation is still there when it comes to these two. The Shadow is The Other, Darkman is You. Darkman is the victim of extraordinary circumstance that affects his life, The Shadow is the extraordinary circumstance that affects the lives of others. People react to The Shadow, Darkman reacts to people (and rather poorly).

One is the man who takes off his skin (or yours, staring back at you) to reveal the weird creature of the night ready to prowl and pounce and cackle at those who think they hold power over it's domain, and the other is the monster who falls apart bit by bit until you are left staring at the broken man within who has no choice but to be something he was never supposed to be.

The Shadow is The Master of Darkness. Darkman weaponizes the dark, but in the end, he's still just a man, lost within it. Not everyone can be The Shadow, and you would most likely turn into Darkman if you tried.

[genyyasafin]

Consequences (They’re finally here)

Part 2 of 8!! Featuring young Curie and her grandmother (sort of) and told in the style of an interview. 

Tagging: @zoyyanazyalensky @fire-sapphics @official-flower-consultant @jam-is-my-food @i-love-side-characters @damischs @knifescythe

Somewhere in MidMerica, Year of the Raptor, 8 months after the sinking of Endura

BT (interviewer): Hello, I’m here about Susan Bauer?

VB (interviewee): *imperiously* No. You’re here about Honorable Scythe Marie Curie. I have little to add that has not already been said. 

BT *visibly confused*: I was led to believe that they were the same person. 

VB: Oh, they are. In a sense. You see, Scythe Curie has been and has been seen as many things. Apprentice and leader, infamous and simply famous, enigma and open book. However, Susan Bauer has only ever been two things: a little girl with a conscience, and my favorite granddaughter. 

BT: You sound like you have a lot to say about her. 

VB: She deserves more notice than she has ever been given. You see, if you had asked Susan Bauer, countless years ago, she would have told you that she knew everything there was to know about consequences. She would have told you that they were punishments for wrongful actions and therefore she never needed to fear them. And she’d have told you that consequences were always justified. She’d have been wrong on all three counts, lessons that she appears to have learned all too late. 

BT: I’m beginning to see what drove her to become the Scythe Curie we all know today. 

VB: You don’t, not really, and you couldn’t without being there. No matter what name she was known as, Susan was a force of nature that changed every life around her for the better. Perhaps the best example of this came years ago, in times I can scarcely remember. Susan was a teenager, I’ve forgotten what year. She hadn’t yet gotten mixed up in the scythedom though. Have you ever set back your age?

BT: No. 

VB: Then you weren’t there, in those early days. It isn’t an experience that can be recreated. Everyone was just a little bit corrupt and just a little bit scared. Police officers, however, were among the worst. 

BT: Police officers?

VB: They were something like the Nimbus officers without being beholden to the Thunderhead. Instead, they were beholden only to themselves and that made them dangerous. Trying to avoid them was a potentially deadly game of chess- both sides knew the moves, it was down to which side could execute them better. One common move, for those brave enough, was to step between the police officer and the victim and film them. However, this was meant for people older, stronger, more than a small little girl who spoke too angrily. Not that it was enough to stop Susan. 

BT: What happened?

VB: Hush. Let me tell the story. You see, I was with her when it happened. We’d been doing… something… and we’d come across a police officer cornering a girl not much older than Susan herself. One second, I’m a bit hazy on the details.

VB: I believe the police officer was asking about the girl’s parents, it was a bit hard to see. However, she was clearly uncomfortable and was constantly asking to leave. The officer, instead, moved closer and asked louder. Susan was, as always, incapable of staying away from a misdeed. I remember telling her to stay put, that I’d take care of it, but she rushed out of my hold and towards the scene. She started recording the disruption and asked loudly what the girl had done to warrant such treatment. The officer did not have a very good answer, instead gesturing and muttering something about how she was “obstructing justice” or “if she would just cooperate, we could have avoided all of this”

BT: What? That’s… ridiculous. Why didn't the Thunderhead discipline them?

VB: The Thunderhead had very little power back then, now let me get back to the story, please. Anyway, Susan, obviously, was unimpressed. She told the officer that unless the poor girl was a suspect in a murder- because that was still a thing in those barbaric days- he would need to leave and this was not, in fact, an emergency. Alone, this may not have done much. However, I loudly agreed with her, and soon other people chimed in as well. Perhaps the officer could have handled being chastised by a young woman, but he could not handle being chastised by a young woman with every other man there agreeing with Susan. He slunk away, and the recording went viral. 

BT: Was Susan well known then??

VB: Oh, not really. You see, her face was not in the recording, merely her voice, and few people cared just who had called the corrupt officer out. It was merely important that someone did. Within a few months, the officer was sacked, and police power had been reduced vastly. Susan was not the first loud voice in the debate or the most critical one, but she was unable to resist being one of them. Even back then, there was no conflict that she did not have an opinion on, although perhaps Susan was much more careless with her beliefs than Scythe Curie had become. 

BT: I can see how she ended up the Grand Dame of Death.

VB: Hush. In another world, that moment could have ended very differently. Susan could have been in danger or alienated or ineffective. However, in this world, she was a girl beginning to see the world around her and its bloodiness. She did the right thing and was rewarded with other right decisions. It was experiences like those, surrounded with the support of other righteous people, that set Susan up for the mistakes of Honorable Scythe Marie Curie. She had never been ineffective, had never seen how it could be a blessing in disguise. Oh no, Susan acted on her conscience, and that was a rare thing. Perhaps that's why, through all these years, no one had the heart to teach her the consequences of good decisions.

BT: That’s quite a story. Susan was quite a girl. 

VB: And she may have matured into a different woman, but she stayed just as vibrant. Her fate was ill-deserved, an unjust consequence for someone who was once the fiercest proponent of justice this world has had. Consequences are coming for Rowan Damisch. 

VB *definitively, as if a weight has been lifted from her*: Thank you, for letting me share an old story. Feel free to take some more cookies, and I hope you got all the material you needed. 

[revchainsaw]

The Lost Boys (1987)

The City of Santa Carla, CA has a vampire problem and that's just the sort of thing i've been looking for. We are amping up to Summerween my flock. What better way to get in the spirit of the season than with this 80s Vampire flick set in a balmy california beach town.

I can't lie, having just recently viewed the 1985 film Fright Night, it got me comparing the two so you may read some of my opinions comparing and contrasting The Lost Boys with it's predecessor. But where Fright Night is a classic vampire story brought into the then contemporary 1980s, the Lost Boys was the decades very own vampire film. Drawing from classic vampire films and the story of Peter Pan in equal parts the Lost Boys set the precedent that vampire films would draw from for years to come.

Sermon

The Emerson family falls on hard times financially and therefor moves to the town where Grandpa Emerson, the patriarch of the family grew up; Santa Carla, CA. The family has recently experienced a schism due to divorce, leaving the family unit as a grandfather, a mother and 2 sons, Michael and Sam.

Michael is quiet and masculine, his interests include fitness, motorcycles, and girls, while Sam is a bit more timid. Sam is into comic books and still can't sleep with his closet door open. The two begin to explore their surroundings, and while Sam meets the self-certain and precocious Frog brothers, self proclaimed Vampire hunters, Michael is lure by a young woman named Star into a group of predatory teenage vampire punks. Which let's face it, if they were to lean into the schlock, Teenage Vampire Punks would have been a great alternative title.

These Lost Boys as we'll call them seem to be led by David, played by Keifer Sutherland. David and his gang seek to initiate michael and through some manipulation trick him into drinking vampire blood disguised as wine. This turns Michael into a half vampire, who must fully give up his humanity to join the family.

Sam learns of his brothers transformation and after a little adjustment seeks the aid of the Frog brothers. They decide they must defeat the lead vampire to return Michael to normal, and astutely as we'll later find out (no spoiler warning, the movies almost 30 years old), pegs his mom's new boyfriend Max as the head Vamp. Max outwits the boys attempts to prove his vampirism, and thus they settle on the belief that David is the big bad.

The Frog brothers invade the Lost Boys hideout and kill Bill of Wyld Stallyns fame. They narrowly escape into the daylight before David can exact his revenge, but they know they have targets on their backs and they prepare themselves for a vampiric siege. The Lost Boys attack the Emersons and the Frog brothers and are defeated one by one. David is killed by Michael but no return to normalcy occurs. Max reveals himself to be the big bad, right before Grandpa Emerson returns and saves his family from this Peter Pan's Neverland. Grandpa hops out of his truck and delivers one of the greatest final zingers in film history.

The Benediction

Best Character: Did you know David means Beloved?

It's true look it up, it's Hebrew. David is the prototype for the young, rebellious, sexy vampire. It wasn't long after the lost boys that we got Spike in Buffy the vampire slayer, who is let's be honest just the 90's version of David. Spike my be a bit more of a lone wolf, but David is hands down the best character in this movie, and really what competition does he have other than the Frog brothers? Michael is kind of a lump, even if he's a lump who resembles Jim Morrison.

I am also going to include best actor into this category. All the charisma and charm falls on Kiefer Sutherland, as he acts circles around everyone else on screen. There's a reason the image of David is what you think of every time you think of this movie. He's not even the main antagonist of the movie. David is a great look, a scary vampire, a great actor in a great role.

Worst Character: Who's the Kid?

The first time I ever saw Lost Boys, i didn't understand how Michael and Star had a kid already. It was later that I realized he's just some kid. He doesn't really add anything but a cool looking image of a vampire faced little boy. Kind of a superfluous part. Not bad, just extra and unnecessary.

Best Kill: Death Breath (or Guard Dog on Duty)

The best kill of Lost Boys is when the Frog brothers defeat ... Paul? one of the other vampires besides David. Whoops did I say the Frog brothers defeated him? No, that was actually Nanook coming in for the kill. The Frog Bros fail to succesfully off this bloodsucker when Nanook barges into the bathroom and knocks this punk into a tub of Holy Water. The gore on the vamps face is excellent and probably some of the better practical effects work in the film.

Best Effect: Holy Water Works

While the Vampire melt itself is pretty darn good to look at, it's immediately followed by a volatile reaction that Sam Raimi would be proud of. The whole bathroom convulses and erupts with blood, it comes out of every pipe! the toilet explodes! It's awesome!

Best Aspect: Not your Big Brothers Vampire Movie

I had mentioned earlier that I had been comparing this movie to Fright Night, and as much as I love that older film, the Lost Boys beats it at almost every way. The effects in Fright Night are above bar constantly and hold nothing back, but the film for all of it's unrelenting visuals is actually quite slow. The Lost Boys and Fright Night definitely represent how much youth culture can change in just 2 years. You'd be forgiven for thinking these films take place in different decades. The Lost Boys is faster, has more attitude, and is much more adventurous in it's scope than Fright Night. If Fright Night was Judas Priest then the Lost boys is Iron Maiden. It's not as mature, but it's just that rebellious juvenility that gives it it's punch.

Worst Aspect: Mini Max

As far as big bads go. If I could make another comparison to Fright Night, it would be so much more intimidating the have a charming Jerry Dandridge playing his games with the Emersons, as his underlings The Lost Boys get the dirty work done and have fun doing it. However, we end up with this kind of dorky dude, who is even written off in the second act, only to return at the ass end of the movie just to be immediately slain and provide the but of the final quip. It was pretty weak sauce.

Best Dog: Nanook

Nanook is a good dog. He does all the protecting and is the best vampire hunter in the movie. Sorry Frog Bros.

Runner Up Dog: Thorn

Thorn is a good dog. But Thorn is also a bad dog. Thorn is a hellhound familiar to Max, but she is still good at doing dog stuff. So round of applause for this good girl.

Best make-up: Vampire Face

Fright Night stomps all over Lost Boys in the effects department, except for in the design of the horrific vampire face. The vampire face in Fright Night looks like a prosthetic sitting on an actors face. It doesn't feel like that mouth could be used for eating or biting but is just there to look creepy. In moving away from that the make up artists for the Lost boys focused more on the upper parts of the face, creating an almost cat like predatory look for when the vampires are at their most carnivorous. This style was absolutely borrowed by the team on Buffy the Vampire Slayer years later, and it's an aspect of Vampires in film that has sadly gone away. Sign the petition, let's bring back vampire face.

Best Feature: The Soundtrack

It would be impossible to talk about the Lost Boys without talking about the soundtrack. There's not one standout song in this movie, some may argue the Echo and the Bunnymen cover of People are Strange, but I think it's just one incredibly well utilized song of many for this film. Listen to the whole soundtrack, it's all good.

Summary

In the 80s there were several attempts to resurrect the monsters of old. Several directors who had grown up on the Universal monsters were now in the position to make films themselves. The resistance to rely on vampires and werewolves was fading and these sorts of monster movies were finally being green lit. Arguably, An American Werewolf in London is the best of these films, but the Lost Boys is definitely the most representative of the movement. It's not a satire, its funny but not a comedy, it's not parody or a subversion. The Lost Boys is 100% the definitive 80s Vampire Movie.

Grade: A

[aion-rsa]

Cobra Kai: How the Show’s Martial Arts Level Up in Season 3

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

This article contains Cobra Kai season 3 spoilers.

Despite its iconic standing within the martial arts genre, the martial arts in The Karate Kid have never been outstanding. Sure, the crane kick is a classic, but from a technical standpoint, it’s not that impressive. Ralph Macchio had no martial arts training prior to undertaking the role of Daniel. In many ways, that’s part of the charm. Whether you know martial arts or not, Daniel’s wax on, wax off awkwardness makes Macchio’s portrayal more genuine. 

Throughout the film franchise, it was Daniel’s adversaries who were the martial artists. William Zabka (Johnny Lawrence) had a background in wrestling prior to the first film and continued to train in Tang Soo Do under Master Pat E. Johnson after it wrapped (Johnson played the referee and trained the actors for the film.) Martin Kove (John Kreese) studied Gosoku-ryu Karate under the founder of that style, Grandmaster Takayuki Kubota. The villains in the sequels all had previous training too. Yuji Okumoto (Chozen Toguchi) began Chito-ryu Karate when he was thirteen and was a brown belt by the time he appeared in The Karate Kid Part II. In The Karate Kid Part III, Thomas Ian Griffith (Terry Silver) practiced Taekwondo since childhood and holds a black belt in Kenpo Karate. Stage combat is one of his specialties. And Sean Kanen (Mike Barnes), like Okumoto, studied Karate since he was thirteen, only his style was Shotokan. He also worked professionally as a bar bouncer. 

Because Macchio was a much weaker martial artist than his adversaries both in the story and reality, it was challenging for the stunt choreographers. It limits the vocabulary of where the fights could go. Without a strong martial artist in the lead role, the fight choreographers had to create work arounds, like the crane kick. But again, that was part of the charm of Daniel. No one could play Daniel LaRusso like Ralph Macchio. 

Cobra Kai faces a similar situation because like Macchio, few of the lead actors had previous martial arts training. For more authenticity, newcomers to the cast were not only tasked to learn Karate, they had to do some of their own stunts. With that in mind, Den of Geek spoke with Macchio and more about season 3’s ambitious combat, and the training and editing that goes into major fight scenes. 

No Mercy

Cobra Kai suffers from the same constraint as the original films had with Daniel. All the high school kids are amateurs. We bear witness to their inductions into Karate, and their meteoric rise in skills (Just like The Karate Kid, Cobra Kai takes major liberties on how quickly someone can progress in the martial arts, but so do most stories in the genre). They’re teenagers, not ninjas or Shaolin monks. The fight scenes cannot pivot on extreme Jackie Chan moves. To remain genuine to the story, the next generation must retain some of Daniel’s awkwardness. 

However, stunt coordinators Jahnel Curfman and Hiro Koda did excellent work in keeping it real. In the premiere episode, Johnny’s first fight showed that Zabka had kept up on his Tang Soo Do and could still throw a decent kick. It served the story perfectly, showing Johnny as slightly out of shape, but still formidable. As seasons 1 and 2 progressed, the fight choreography complemented its story arcs appropriately, but Cobra Kai wasn’t a show just to watch for its fight scenes. 

This changed with the season 2 finale “No Mercy.” Curfman and Koda composed a thrilling high school brawl with a solid long take shot – a “one-er” where there are no cuts in the action. It was a thrilling fight, full of complex cinematography and enough close-ups that we could see that many of the actors did their own stunts. 

The season 3 finale fight in the LaRusso residence was even better, longer, and more complex. According to Xolo Maridueña (Miguel), Cobra Kai’s second one-er was a challenge. “When you film an episode like the finale of season 2, you get to the point where you’re like, ‘How do we top this?’ It feels like we kind of achieved everything that we wanted. And I think at that point, we did achieve everything that we wanted. We got this really, really great scene that felt so grand. And in season 3, we want to give people that same kind of feeling, that same rush that you get from watching so many moving parts working together, but it needs to be different.”

How was it different? Maridueña elaborates. “I think that you see that the motives of a lot of these characters are different. The circumstances, the need to win I think is much higher in a finale. And I think up until the very end and even after the fight feels concluded you still feel that sense of weight on your shoulders.”

The Long Take One-Er

Cuts make fight choreography easier. When there’s one cut for every strike, retakes aren’t as difficult. If there are two strikes before a cut, it’s twice as hard. More strikes increase the challenge exponentially. In the original film, The Karate Kid, there was a one-er, but it wasn’t a fight scene. When Daniel first enters the All-Valley Karate Tournament from the locker room, it’s a continuous long take that clocks in just shy of a minute and a half. The blocking is complicated but it’s not as complex as a fight scene would be, and according to Macchio, the scene took 35 takes to get right. 

In filmmaking, one-ers are always held in high regard for their technical achievement. Hitchcock’s Rope was a pioneering example with the entire film consisting of only 11 one-ers. The critically acclaimed World War I film 1917 was nearly a single one-er. When it comes to fight choreography, this is why classic Kung Fu films from the 70s and 80s are so highly respected by martial art movie connoisseurs. While they weren’t one-ers, those fights, like what was coming out of  Shaw Brothers Studio, went dozens of moves before a cut. Some recent films like Atomic Blonde and the John Wick trilogy have showcased one-er fights. What’s more, they are shot in such a way that we can see that Keanu Reeves and Charlize Theron are doing a lot of their own stunts. In contrast, in Netflix’s latest assassin thriller Ava, all of Jessica Chastain’s fights are one strike, one shot, and her stuntperson takes over for all the heavy lifting. 

There are some trade tricks to one-ers. The first is a stitch where the camera pans to a featureless surface. This can disguise a covert cut, making the scene appear seamless. But in actuality, there was a break. The other is what is known in the stunt industry as a “Texas switch.” This is where an actor is swapped out with a stunt person by somehow leaving the shot, like being tossed out of frame or ducking behind an obscuring set piece.  

Television fight choreography has leveled up in the last few years. Daredevil was a game-changer for TV one-ers. The show kept upping its game every season. Season 1 episode 2 “Cut Man” ended with a one-er hallway fight that caught every martial arts fan’s attention. It had a lot of stitches and Texas switches. During that one-er, the camera repeatedly moves across featureless hallway walls hiding cuts and Daredevil is masked, allowing for multiple stuntmen to take over. Nevertheless, it’s still a thrilling fight and top-notch choreography. Season 2 episode 3 “New York’s Finest” featured another brutal one-er in a staircase fight. Again, Daredevil is masked so swapping stuntmen was easy. On top of that, Daredevil knocks out the lights, so a lot of the fight is in the dark, obscuring more stitches and switches. In Season 3 episode 4 ‘Blindsided’ Daredevil pulled off their most spectacular one-er of all and one of the best that has ever made it to the small screen so far, the prison fight. In that scene, Daredevil is not masked so Charlie Cox can be seen doing a lot of his own stunts. It clocks in at over 10 minutes. The fight choreographers on Daredevil, Chris Brewster, Philip Silvera, and Roberto Gutierrez raised the bar on TV fight choreography.

Karate And Stunt Training

The one-ers in Cobra Kai aren’t nearly as long, but they do showcase the actors doing many of their own stunts. And like Macchio, few of the cast have had previous training. Jacob Bertrand (Hawk) has a purple belt in Karate and Taylor Buchanan dabbled in Taekwondo, but that’s about the extent of the young cast’s experience. Beyond learning their lines and finding their characters, the actors had to take a crash course in martial arts. 

“I only started learning in season 2,” says Peyton List (Tory), “and that was just in episode 4 of season 2, when I first came in. And I just take everything I can get, and I love learning it. So I’m trying to do everything I can even from home, but that one-er was one of the most fun. Jahnel, my stunt double, she was like, ‘You’re doing this all on your own.’ And that was a big moment for me, and I’m excited for everyone to see that.” 

“My training is something I take super seriously,” adds Mary Mouser (Sam), “because I know that a lot of people who watch this show love martial arts and love the fighting aspect. As much as all the other fun things we have, we have a lot of really cool martial arts fans. So I want to make them proud. I am clearly still a novice in this world, but Samantha is not. So it’s fun to get to stretch myself, to see how much I can push myself to look like I’ve been doing Karate for all these years, when in total probably have about a year’s worth of training so far.”

Bertrand’s Karate background doesn’t make shooting a one-er any easier. “The next couple of days after those types of shoots, you’re definitely sore for at least two days. You’re running the same thing over and over again at 110%, but honestly, I’m just so excited for everyone to see that final fight, it’s going to be so great.”

Forever Young

In season 3, Daniel says he’s now as old as Miyagi was when they first met. Despite his baby face, Macchio is 59. He admits doing fight scenes no  isn’t as easy as back in the day. “The challenge is always as I get older or attempt to look younger, is the physical stuff. Staying in shape, not getting hurt. It requires work and attention and focus.”

Macchio is like David Carradine, who played Kwai Chang Caine in the television show Kung Fu. For their defining roles, they posed as martial arts masters, however they are actors first and foremost, not martial artists. At the very least, Macchio has maintained his integrity by never claiming to be an expert. Carradine milked his master role by writing martial arts books and selling instructional videos, despite his martial mediocrity. Today, Carradine’s martial products are generally disregarded, even mocked, by earnest practitioners. Most considered them to be a joke (the fact that Carradine’s Kung Fu uniforms looked more like Klingon athleisure suits didn’t help). Macchio could have easily cashed in doing the same but to his credit, he never did. 

Will Cobra Kai attempt an even bigger one-er for Season 4? “As soon as the fight is over you’re ready to watch the next one,” teases Maridueña. “And I think that’s all you can ask for in a fight scene.”

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Cobra Kai season 3 is now available on Netflix.

The post Cobra Kai: How the Show’s Martial Arts Level Up in Season 3 appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3rMzXhZ

[as-write-as-rain]

Once Upon A Dream (remix) - Chapter 2

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Summary: A Sleeping Beauty/Winter Soldier remix, featuring the reader as a SHIELD agent who might have powers (or just a really finely tuned intuition)

Warnings: None. If you’ve seen and enjoyed the Captain America films, you shouldn’t find anything troubling here.

The second chapter of my Fairy Tale AU for @moonbeambucky’s 5k Writing Challenge! I’d hoped to get it out sooner than this, but I’ve been under the weather.

Chapter 2

“Hey, Y/N, wait up!”

You were just heading out of the locker room, ready to get home and take a nice long bath. It’d been a long night, and even though you’d managed to catch some sleep on the jet, you still had a few too many bruises for comfort (thanks to some Algerian goons). But when you heard Natasha call your name, you paused and held the door open, waiting for her to catch up.

She gave you a grateful half-smile when she reached you, and you nodded in response as you started walking again. “How’s your back?”

She grimaced and stretched. “Eh, I’ll be alright. At least Rogers took most of the damage by crashing through the window first. Yay?”

You chuckled. “Must be nice to have super healing.” You glanced back over your shoulder, but the hallway was empty behind you. “Did he head home already?” Even as you asked the question, you felt a twinge that told you the answer was going to be no.

Sure enough, Nat was shaking her head. “He made a beeline for Fury’s office as soon as we landed.”

Now it was your turn to grimace. “I did notice he wasn’t happy when you guys got back to the jet,” you admitted. “I guess Fury will have to finally tell him about the project now. They’ve been putting it off for too long, anyway.”

Nat sighed. “Yeah, probably. I don’t think he’s gonna like it, though.”

That was the understatement of the century. “Probably not,” you agreed. You’d reached the garage, so you stopped next to your motorcycle and started putting on your helmet. “I’ll check in on him later, make sure he’s doing okay.”

She smirked and gave you a little wave as she sauntered over to her car. “Have fun.”

You scoffed a mirthless laugh. “Of course!”

As you’d predicted, Steve showed up at the Smithsonian exhibit in his honor early that afternoon; you’d noticed it seemed to be a favored destination whenever he was feeling unsure about where he fit into this modern world. He was wearing his classic “disguise” – a baseball cap – as though the top of his head was the only thing that identified him as Captain America.

Yet, it somehow seemed to do the trick; as usual, the patrons of the museum were more focused on the exhibition than on the people around them, and with the exception of one small, observant child, he maintained his anonymity. Perhaps it was because the exhibit always made him out to be something larger than life – so when he slouched in here in a nondescript cap (Cap in a cap, ha!), he was so unassuming that nobody even looked twice.

He didn’t blink an eye when you silently fell into step beside him. He’d noticed early on that you had a strongly developed intuition and you tended to follow it unflinchingly. It never steered you wrong, and you had learned to trust it – and by extension, Steve trusted it too. You appreciated that about him: that even if you couldn’t explain how you knew something, he always went with your gut anyway. That’s the kind of thing that makes a person a great team member.

And the fact that he never once treated you like it was something weird or creepy…well, that’s the kind of thing that makes someone a great friend.

You’d shown up mostly to be a comforting presence to Steve, so you didn’t impose yourself upon him or force him into conversation. You could tell that he just needed to know he wasn’t alone; other than that, you left him to his own thoughts. While he was preoccupied with his soul searching, you kept a casual eye on the crowds, and every now and then perused one of the displays. Most of them you knew by heart, and you had the video loops memorized from all your previous visits to the museum with Steve. Yet, as always, your heart stuttered when the section dedicated to James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes came into view.

Mindful of the heat rising to your face, you tried vainly to ignore the memories that flooded your mind – if recalling moments in a dream could even really be considered memories. Thankfully, Steve was too lost in his own head to notice your discomfort, and you took the opportunity to study the picture of Bucky obliquely. His eyes looked every bit as soulful as they had last night in your dream, but for some reason his hair in these pictures (and the footage) always looked weird to you.

What was it about this guy anyway, that made him such a frequent figure in your sleep? He’d been dead for 70 years – the words on the wall made this fact very clear, as did Steve’s haunting retelling of the memory that often kept him awake at night. Yet your mind couldn’t seem to accept that truth, and by now you had grown accustomed to his near-nightly presence in your dreams, for the most part.

Normally, a recurring dream would be a warning or a signal about something you needed to look out for – an omen that something was about to happen, or a sign that you needed to interpret. At least, that’s how your dreams used to be, when you were growing up. At this point, you could only vaguely remember what it was like to not dream about Bucky.

And these dreams weren’t technically recurring either. They were different every time, and the only constant was the presence of James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes. A man you’d never met, the long dead best friend of your best friend, a stranger who didn’t feel at all like a stranger. You felt like you knew him intimately – because you’d seen him, talked to him, interacted with him, pretty much every night for the last decade or so. He felt like a real person to you, and your adventures felt like real memories.

Hell, you felt significantly closer to him than you did to most people in your waking life.

Sure, sometimes Steve appeared in your dreams, too, but he was never the focus – which was strange, given that the two of you were so close in real life. It was always more like a cameo appearance, a side character; and most of the time if he did show up, you still barely even interacted with him. Bucky was always the focal point, no matter what else was going on in the dream.

The whole thing was just…weird. You couldn’t make heads or tails of it. And you’d certainly never mentioned it to anybody else. What were you supposed to say? “Hey, you know your best friend whose death traumatized you? I have lovey-dovey dreams about him all the time – long before you and I met, actually.” Yeah, no. That conversation would be super awkward, not to mention pointless; it wouldn’t change anything, other than making Steve feel uncomfortable.

And who else could you tell? Natasha would jump all over you and tease you about it, and anyone else…well, you couldn’t be assured that word wouldn’t get back to Steve. After all, Bucky was his friend, someone he actually knew and cared deeply for. For you to dream about him was the equivalent of dreaming about a celebrity, someone you’d never actually met and only knew about through second- or third-hand stories. And if people knew you dreamed about him pretty much every night? They’d think you were more than a little obsessive. And honestly, who could blame them?

Shaking your head to clear it, you tried to bring your mind back to the present. You filed into the darkened alcove behind Steve, and joined him on the bench to watch the much-loved interview with Peggy Carter. This was the room that Steve generally spent the most time in, and you could probably repeat her speech verbatim if someone asked you to. So, in order to keep your mind off the things you really didn’t want to think about right now, you set yourself an objective: trying to count how many times Director Carter blinked during her interview.

Outside the museum, you and Steve checked out one of the food trucks lining the Mall, then sat down on a nearby bench to enjoy your treats. A cool breeze blew across the grass to ruffle your hair, and you spied a handful of colorful kites soaring high above. Down closer to the Washington Monument, a trio of college students tossed a Frisbee back and forth. To the rest of the world, it was a lovely late spring day, perfect for relaxing: sunny and warm, but yet not close enough to summer to be hot. You would have loved to join in, if it weren’t for this pesky foreboding that wouldn’t seem to leave you alone.

Steve smiled with nostalgia as he opened his Cracker Jack box. “I can’t believe they still make this stuff,” he mumbled, pouring the mix into his hand and shoving it in his mouth.

You grinned. “Does it still taste the same?”

His expression turned thoughtful as he crunched. He took another mouthful to be sure. “I feel like it tastes even better than I remember? But it’s not like I got to eat it all the time,” he hastened to add. “It was mostly a special occasion food, saved for ballgames and stuff.”

You nodded in understanding, and tore open your package of Astronaut Ice Cream. You’d bought it in the Air & Space gift shop while anticipating his arrival; it made for a great snack, and you didn’t even have to keep it cold. Sure, it tasted a little like cardboard, but the flavor had grown on you somehow.

The two of you munched in silence for a bit, watching the chattering crowd of schoolchildren who were amassing nearby. Harried teachers were attempting to wrangle them into organized groups, desperately counting heads to ensure all their charges were present. Some of the less-obedient children were running around harassing mobs of pigeons, frightening them into flight like feathered bowling pins. You chuckled at their antics, but Steve remained pensive.

“Did you know?” He eventually asked. He kept his voice low, out of habit; one never knew who could overhear.

You didn’t have to look at him to know exactly what he was asking, but you attempted to make light of the situation. “About Cracker Jacks? Yes, I’ve actually been an expert in eating them since early childhood.”

He snorted. “It’s called Cracker JACK. Singular. You wouldn’t call it ‘pop corns’ would you?” Bantering with Steve was always comforting; but before you could do more than smirk in response, he dropped his voice again, adding, “And you know that’s not what I was talking about, Y/N.”

Behind your sunglasses, your eyes casually skimmed the vicinity, making sure no one was near enough to listen in. “I knew,” you admitted quietly. “Fury briefed Nat and me at the same time. I warned him you should know too, but he made me promise not to say anything. He wanted to be the one to tell you.” You dropped your gaze to your silver packet of half-eaten pink styrofoam.

Steve sighed. “I don’t like it, Y/N.” He folded up his Cracker Jack box, and tossed it into a nearby trashcan with casual skill, as though it were perfectly natural to throw something that far with barely any effort. “But I suppose you already knew that.”

You nodded, studying him out of the corner of your eye. He didn’t seem angry, or even upset. He just seemed…morally troubled. His struggle was intellectual, rather than emotional – though no less agonizing. You put a comforting hand on his arm, hoping to reassure him. “I don’t like it either, honestly. The whole thing gives me a bad feeling.”

He frowned. “Well, that makes me feel even better.”His sarcasm made you bark a laugh, even though this was no laughing matter.

“I’m not going to caramel-coat it, Steve, something is going on. Something just beyond what we can see.” You leaned forward, elbows on your knees. “Precisely what, I don’t know. But I’m working on figuring that out.”

Steve let out a long breath you hadn’t been aware he was holding. Slowly, he stood, wiping the crumbs off his hands. “Well, I guess I’m just going to have to be patient. If anyone can get to the bottom of it, it’s you.” He beamed at you, and you returned his smile. You felt honored that he had that much faith in you.

You just hoped you wouldn’t let him down.

He bid you adieu, saying something about visiting an old friend. You knew exactly which old friend he meant, but you let him have his privacy. It’s not like you were interested in tagging along – and besides, you had a mystery to solve.

After he left, you slumped back against the bench with a frustrated growl, clenching your fists. The crinkle in your hand reminded you that you had yet to finish your snack, which perked you up immediately. You popped another piece in your mouth while you ruminated over the evidence at hand.

The mission yesterday had gone mostly to plan, but you’d been having a strange feeling for awhile now that had increased acutely while you were on the Lemurian Star. What was Jasper Sitwell doing on a launch ship in the middle of the Indian Ocean? What answers lay encoded in that data that Nat stole from the ship’s hard drive? 

Your sixth sense was going crazy, filling you with an uneasy dread and the certainty that something bad was on the horizon. But what? And what would be the best course of action to take, if you wanted to avoid it – or, at the very least, minimize the damage?

As you crunched away, you tuned into your deeper intuition, trying to determine the root of your growing alarm. Suddenly you stopped mid-chew, nearly choking on the vaguely-strawberry space dust as you gasped at a sudden impulse: you needed to call Director Fury immediately. 

Or better yet, Maria Hill.

[lovesquareshippingtrash]

Oblivio Reaction

Okay so I’ve never done one of these before, but I think Oblivio is my new favourite episode of the show so I gotta.

SPOILERS and a looong post below the cut.

Starting off, we are IMMEDIATELY thrust into the action with Ladybug and Cat Noir - and not just as a minor set up thing like in Weredad, this is for the main plot of the episode. We’re breaking the formula immediately in the first scene and I love it.

We immediately have them falling for each other, which is perfect, they’re meant for each other through it all. BUT WE’LL COME BACK TO ALL THAT LATER.

FORESHADOWING? Actual literary storytelling devices? In MY Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir? It’s more likely than you think! The early plant of the symbol to call Master Fu was great. It’s shown but not acknowledged, nor is it in any way made a big deal. It’s just there until they need it. Superb.

Same basic reactions to kwamis as in Origins is great, because of course they’d have the same reactions. Though they seemed to come around pretty quickly here.

So they’re being chased by an unseen akuma that’s clearly posing a major threat to Marinette and Adrien; the collapse of the elevator moments before Tikki helps them escape when they don’t have powers or memories is a genuine threat the likes of which they never typically face. Not seeing the enemy, and seeing from its hunting perspective, is the perfect level of horror for this show. I’m sure kids watching this will be terrified - I mean, that’s the same technique used by films like Alien and Predator to convoke the sense of danger.

Then when we finally see the villain, it could have easily been a let down - and in any other episode I think this would have been. It’s a very simple, plain design with only a few key features and that colouring to make it stand out. But in this episode, when our heroes have no memories and we don’t know what’s going on either, having a faceless, unidentifiable villain is absolutely PERFECT.

And that VOICE? It’s so wonderfully creepy. The effect of combining two voices is so effective, especially in that they work to disguise each other somewhat. I know others did, but I didn’t realise who they were until the end. Hearing this mysterious being refer to itself as “we” really adds to the creepiness, the Legion type feeling.

So this episode does beautiful work highlighting why Marinette and Adrien were the perfect choices for heroes. Immediately, under intense pressure, they highlight their quick-thinking, their resourcefulness, their creativity. Marinette’s trick with the phone was great, and for the first time, Adrien gets his own version of “Ladybug vision”, which is awesome for a bunch of reasons. It’s so good to be shown in an episode that it’s not actually a power (despite a few episodes having dialogue to the contrary), but Marinette’s own creative thinking. It’s also good to be shown that Adrien is also able to think outside the box like that, and I hope we get it more in future. The fact that it was patterned with his shirt’s stripes is ridiculous and great.

BOY that “user guide” situation is pretty nice, huh? Might have been good if Tikki or Plagg could have mentioned that in Origins, even after their first fight. Ladybug accidentally activating lucky charm, then throwing away her yoyo was brilliant.

The fact that the episode is so good and so fun also means that goof moments aren’t just more holes to pick at, but silly little things to laugh at - in particular, Ladybug’s infinite timer after calling on her lucky charm. Always so convenient.

I just... okay let’s talk more about how beautiful and in love these two children are... just... through it all. Okay, so they pieced together a few hints to realise they individually cared about each other, but it was through what followed that they fell for each other all over again. And now we can have everyone shut up with the nonsense about the different sides, because Adrien would so easily fall for Marinette, or Marinette for Cat Noir, if they weren’t SO BLIND.

AND THAT KISS. HOT DANG. Move over Dark Cupid, Horrificator, Mayura, any other freaking episode that so much as hinted at a kiss! Because DAYUM. We got the sweetest, most tender, most PASSIONATE kiss this show has EVER seen, and likely will ever see for a looong time. Holding hands, and just... both of them wanting it, both of them fully aware of what’s going on, knowing what was about to happen, knowing both sides of the other... just sensational. We won’t be getting anything close to that again until post-reveal.

Okay, so we get to the end of the episode, back on the bus. Alya and Nino explain what happened. AND THEN MR PENGUINO HAPPENED AND I LOST MY MIND. You can here more about my thoughts on the glory that was that scene here. I think Mr Penguino is going to end up having a long-lasting impact on the fandom, though.

Minor point there, but nice to FINALLY have them be shown to be doing something school-wise, even if they’re not actually at school - nice to see Miss Bustier, and nice to actually see freaking Lila! Remember, show, how you set her up to be the new day-to-day antagonist??

But through all of that, here’s my favourite part of this episode. Because going into this, we knew what was going on. It’s no secret; their identities are revealed in the first minute or two. We KNOW that they’re going to lose all of these memories at the end of the episode. I went into this fully expecting to just have a fun time and for nothing much to come of it - when she kissed him on the cheek, I was so happy, even expecting nothing to come of any of this.

 THEN THE SHOW THROWS A CURVEBALL. Alya takes a picture of the kiss, and shows the heroes (frankly, after Ladybug’s reaction I’d have preferred it if Alya had been cool enough not to post it online, but that’s so minor). They now have SOME knowledge of what happened when they lost their memories. Adrien now knows, one way or another, that Ladybug actually fell for him, and could again... thankfully, because of how this show works this episode won’t have an impact on their behaviour for a while, but hopefully this won’t cause Cat Noir to push Ladybug harder again. I don’t begrudge his teasing at the end there as he was clearly looking at Alya’s picture, but let’s leave it at that.

It’s a shame that there couldn’t have been a way for Marinette to get a similar experience of seeing herself and Adrien kissing, and instead she’s left feeling somewhat uncomfortable, but it would be so contrived to have her see that and Adrien see the other version without them each seeing both and being able to piece things together.

But the important point here is, despite how easy the premise would have made it, this episode DID NOT take the easy way out of undoing any potential development from the episode, which has been especially egregious lately; from Stormy Weather 2 teasing the idea of Adrien getting a clue, to Animaestro having Chloé say that she won’t expose Marinette’s crush on Adrien for a super flimsy reason, episodes lately have felt a little more fillery than would be ideal. But now, not only has their relationship and perspectives on each other developed, but even Hawk Moth is now aware (even if he’s got some of the finer details slightly muddled) that Ladybug and Cat Noir have romantic feelings for each other - he may have realised that Cat Noir had some feelings for Ladybug, or he may have thought that was all just playful banter - but now he’s aware that there’s something deeper, and we’re left with the ominous hint that he’ll exploit that.

SO YEAH. I frigging love this episode. There’s so much going on here and it’s wonderful, and I want to see MORE LIKE THIS in the future please and thank you!

Oh, and Plagg cluelessly freaking out during the transformation was a delight.

[starwarsnonsense]

Top 10 Films of 2018 (So Far)

Since I quite like continuing old traditions, I wanted to do a post rounding up what I consider to be the ten best films of 2018 so far. This list includes a few films that came out in 2017 in the US, since they were only released here in the UK this year.

Have you seen any of the films I cover below? Have I piqued your interest in a title you might not have heard before? Let me know, and do share your favourites too!

1. Annihilation, dir. Alex Garland

This was my most anticipated film of the year, and my hype for it was more than rewarded. This is a marvellously rich and transporting science fiction film that isn’t afraid of taking the viewer to some very weird places. However, Annihilation doesn’t simply rely on its strangeness to succeed - it is also firmly rooted in its characters and themes, which has made it incredibly rewarding to return to. Natalie Portman is fantastic as Lena, and Annihilation is a brilliant showcase for her - Lena is a complex and frequently self-destructive character, riddled by guilt and regrets that shape the pulsating, luminescent world of the mysterious ‘Shimmer’ that she has to venture into. The Shimmer might seem like an environmental phenomenon at first, but it’s really more psychological, being a space that adapts according to the people who enter into it. This film overflows with fascinating and thought-provoking ideas, and it was entirely worth the hike I made over to Brooklyn to catch one of the final showings at the theatre (since Annihilation was denied a theatrical release in the UK, I made a point of seeing it while I was on holiday in New York). I think it will go down as one of the great science fiction films, and it belongs in the same conversations as 2001: A Space Odyssey and Solaris.

2. Beast, dir. Michael Pearce

This little British film - shot mostly on location in Jersey by a first-time director - was easily the biggest (and best) surprise I’ve had so far at the cinema this year. I literally had no idea this film existed until a day or so before I watched it, and that made the experience of viewing it even more wonderful. Moll (Jessie Buckley) is an isolated young woman who is stifled by her controlling family and quiet life on a remote island, as well as a secret sin that bubbles away underneath the surface. Her life is predictable - safe, repetitive and dull - until she meets Pascal, a mysterious local man who she finds she has an affinity with. However, there is a murderer haunting the island, taking the lives of young girls in the night. Who’s to blame, and what impact will the killings have on Moll and Pascal’s swiftly escalating romance? While that is a synopsis more than a review, I felt it necessary to explain the premise to try and compel you to seek this one out. Beast is raw, woozy and utterly absorbing - the love story between Moll and Pascal is one of the most passionate and gripping you’ll ever see on screen, and their chemistry is simply sensational. There’s a real gothic, fairy-tale edge to the story which appealed perfectly to my (admittedly rather niche) tastes. This is a real hidden treasure of a film - do yourself a favour and make it your mission to watch it.

3. Lady Bird, dir. Greta Gerwig

This film was so, so relatable, despite my not really having experienced an adolescence anything like “Lady Bird’s”. While the details of her life are very different from mine, I think anyone can relate to the sweeping brushstrokes - the tensions that can arise between parents and children, the thirst for freedom and independence that builds the closer you get to the final days of school, and the feelings of love and loyalty that are always there even when they’re unspoken. Greta Gerwig captures all of this and so much more with marvellous delicacy, balancing little moments that add colour and spark with more serious scenes so deftly that it’s amazing to think that this is her first feature. Lady Bird is a very specific and very beautiful film, and it’s special precisely because it feels universal even as it feels small and personal to its director. 

4. Eighth Grade, dir. Bo Burnham

This is the perfect double bill with Lady Bird, and the people who have dubbed this film “Lady Bird Jr” are right on the money. Elsie Fisher has a real star turn as the heroine Kayla, who is a very special child - she’s kind, sensitive and thoughtful, which basically means she’s my kind of superhero. But even as she is a good and sweet person, she is also going through all of the trials you’d expect a 13 year old to be facing in 2018, as she wrestles with acne, confusing feelings about super-dreamy boys, and the escalating anxiety that comes with a comment-free Instagram post. Like Lady Bird, this film succeeds in being both very specific and highly universal - the only social media I had to deal with as a teen were MySpace and Bebo, and I found that seeing Kayla wrestle with a whole kaleidoscope of feeds, devices and platforms made her strong grip on her integrity as a  funny and deeply warm-hearted individual all the more remarkable. Bo Burnham, as with Gerwig, made a pretty incredible film here - in particular you should watch out for the father/daughter dynamic, which is my favourite part. Eighth Grade is funny and generous, and the perfect medicine if you’re feeling demoralised by the state of the world right now.

5. The Breadwinner, dir. Nora Twomey

The Breadwinner is a really lovely animated film telling the story of Parvana, a young girl living with her family under the Taliban. When her father is taken off to prison, Parvana sees no other choice but to dress as a boy to provide for her mother and siblings. But how long will her disguise last? The story here was what really gripped me - it’s very simple, in both the telling and the themes, but it is truly beautiful in that simplicity. The emotions are very raw, and this film goes to some shockingly dark places at times - while I think it can be watched with children as long as they are mature enough for some challenging themes and upsetting moments, it’s likely to speak most strongly to adult audiences with a fuller appreciation for the context in which the film is set. It’s a great and moving alternative to more mainstream animated efforts, and is well worth your time.

6. Phantom Thread, dir. Paul Thomas Anderson

This was a delightfully twisted film with an absorbingly complicated and twisty relationship at its centre. Vicky Krieps is an absolute marvel as Alma, and it’s wonderful to see how she battles to bring the fragile and austere designer  Reynolds Woodcock (Daniel Day-Lewis) to heel. It’s also a beautiful film with rather fabulous fashions - if you love couture, particularly from the ‘50s, this will be a real treat. I also appreciated the many allusions to classic cinema - there are strong shades of Hitchcock’s Rebecca, as well as the underrated David Lean film The Passionate Friends. Check this out if you like your romantic dramas weird and entirely unpredictable.

7. Revenge, dir. Coralie Fargeat

Revenge is angry, sun-soaked and batshit insane - and it is pretty great for all of those reasons. It follows Jennifer, the teenage mistress of a sleazy married man. After a horrifying assault Jennifer returns, phoenix-like, to wreak her revenge upon her attackers. This movie was very much inspired by exploitation flicks, with their penchant for showing scantily clad (and frequently bloody) women wielding shotguns to hunt down the brutes who did them wrong. However, first-time director Coralie Fargeat takes every one of those tropes and owns them, ramping up the blood and giving the action a propulsive energy that keeps you gripped even as you know exactly where things are going. The soundtrack here is also one to look out for - it’s all pulsating synths that do a great job of building the suspense and tension from the get-go.

8. Lean on Pete, dir. Andrew Haigh

This is a very painful film in many ways, but it’s only painful because it does such a great job of earning your emotional investment. The lead of this film is Charley, a sensitive and quiet teenage boy who becomes attached to an ailing race horse as he seeks to escape his troubled home-life. When he finds himself in crisis, Charley takes the horse and they head off on a journey across the American heartland. Charlie Plummer is extraordinary as the lead here - Charley is the kind of character that makes you want to reach through the screen so you can offer him a hug of reassurance and support. The photography of the American countryside is exquisite, and means this film really deserves to be seen on the big screen - the breadth of the landscape gives all of the emotional drama some (richly deserved, in my view) extra punch.

9. You Were Never Really Here, dir. Lynne Ramsay

This is a very weird film (you’re probably noticing a theme at this point) but it’s completely absorbing. It’s very much actor-led, and the film rests on the shoulders of Joaquin Phoenix’s gripping and unpredictable performance - in some scenes he’s muttering in deference to his mother like a modern-day Norman Bates, while in others he’s portrayed almost as a lost boy in an overgrown body, disorientated by his environment and engaging in acts of extreme violence as if in a sort of trance. The narrative is fuzzy and unfocused, but I didn’t find that mattered much since I was too busy following every evolution of Phoenix’s face.

10. Thoroughbreds, dir. Cory Finley

Olivia Cooke and Anya Taylor-Joy make fantastic foils to one another as two appallingly privileged teenagers whose obscene wealth is only matched by their resounding lack of morals. This is a film that plays with your loyalties, trying to wrong-foot you at every turn - it’s frequently difficult to figure out what’s genuine here, and while that did sometimes leave me feeling a bit emotionally detached that’s usually the point. This film is more of an intellectual puzzle than a lean, mean, emotion-extracting machine (see: Lean on Pete), and it succeeds brilliantly on that level. The simplicity of the story means the fun lies in picking apart lines and expressions, so go in prepared for some close viewing.

[mentallydatingahotcelebrity]

I Couldn’t Think of A Title But This is a Rant About Ragnarok

I was trying not write write another long-winded spiel about Thor: Ragnarok. There are just SO MANY FLAWS with the film that I find it hard to touch on one specific subject without thinking about 3 other subtopics that relate to the discussion.

Buuuuuuuut. . .

I had to crack my knuckles and pull up my keyboard once more because I keep seeing people go on this “If only Ragnarok had gone such-and-suchly” route. And the way it should have gone, according to many, is still not how it should have gone (even if these ideas are better than how it did go).

First of all, when people say Ragnarok should’ve been “different” they usually shell out some form of this:

1. Thor learns Odin is a despicable asshole

2. Thor discovers Asgard’s terrible past in colonization and decimation of other nations and becomes ashamed of his realm

3. Thor unites with Loki to combat what’s wrong with Asgard’s political views, etc.

NO

NO NO NO

PLEASE, CAN WE CEASE WITH THIS COLONIZATION BUSINESS?!?!?!

I know it’s important--I’m not trying to say it isn’t--but for this film it is a FICTION created by an idiot who didn’t bother to invest time in the source material.

Thor already knew that Odin had conquered realms. That his grandfather had conquered realms. This isn’t news to him whatsoever. We LITERALLY got a prologue in the very first film featuring him and Odin and Loki discussing conquering. AND THEN ANOTHER in The Dark World.

Thor knew that bad things had happened, that all of Asgard wasn’t holy, pure, and good. That Odin was flawed. He REALIZED THIS at the end of his first film and in the middle of his second film.

OR HAVE YOU ALL FORGOTTEN THIS SCENE:

"If and when he [Malekith] comes, his men will fall on ten thousand Asgardian blades." "And how many of our men will fall on theirs?" "As many as are needed! We will fight! To the last Asgardian breath, to the last drop of Asgardian blood."

-- Odin and Thor, Thor: The Dark World

If you watch closely, (unfortunately I have no pictures) Thor stares at Odin with a look that is one of dismay and disappointment as his father walks away. In that moment Thor understands how much Odin is blinded by prejudices, and illusions of things that will not work anymore; that are archaic in their mode and frail in their means. As frail as the old man he suddenly understands his father has become. And then suddenly, Thor--faithful, dog-loyal Thor, who respected Odin so highly and sought in the first film to “make you proud, father”, understands that he can no longer make his father proud and do what he knows is the true right thing to do. It’s subtle, almost entirely beneath the surface-- Expressed through only a single facial movement and an air of disappointed shame which is quickly segued into the cutscenes of Thor following through on his own plan and recruiting Loki, who he now understands is right--at least about Odin’s failures as king.

THIS IS CINEMATIC POETRY AT ITS FINEST.

Thor goes to Odin to petition him to let him find a safe way to end Malekith’s plan, only to discover that Odin is narrow-minded, obtuse; refusing to alter his views or even really LISTEN to Thor. Thor is awakened to the realization that this isn’t what a good king does-- and I think that’s why he turns down the throne at the end when Loki-guised-as-Odin offers it to him.

Thor’s seen Odin for who he really is, what he became. He does not want to be that, so he goes off--Hoping to see more of the realms and to gain a better understanding of them.

“There are Nine Realms. The future king of Asgard must focus on more than one.”

-- Lady Sif

We don’t need some big moment (a waste of footage) where Thor confronts Odin about these errors. We don’t need Thor to say “We colonized and this is bad and I’m going to change it and be a better king” because that’s extra and doesn’t add to the character or the fictional sci/fi-fantasy universe he lives in. It’s literally just a waste and pandering to a bunch of ridiculous themes in our own universe that we really shouldn’t be impressing into Thor’s.

No, I’m going to mention something that in the hype of Ragnarok everyone seems to have misplaced:

THERE WAS A KING BEFORE ODIN.

HIS NAME WAS BOR

AND HE’S THE ONE WHO BUILT ASGARD.

I am so mentally exhausted with all of this “Odin built Asgard on the backs of slaves and brutally colonized scores of planets in the Nine! HE IS EVIL, EVIL! BAAAAAD!!!!!”

NO!

shhh ShhHHH SHHHH!

STOP IT.

It’s farcical lies. All of it. Just kill that ideology now.

Odin did not build Asgard. Like Thor, he inherited it. Premade. Already golden.

Because King Bor did all of that.

The only reason we’re thinking anything else is because we had a clown in a pineapple onesie fuck with the Order of Things and Not Pay Attention to Past Source Material. Taika literally ran over the fact that there was a monarch before Odin, that Odin isn’t creator of Asgard. Hell, did he even read the origin myths for Asgard!?!?!?

It goes:

Ymir the giant. From him came Buri, from Buri came Bor and from Bor came three sons: Odin, Vili, and Ve (in what birth order we know not).

King Bor built Asgard; built it up as the highest realm (highest as in = most glorious of them all), and THEN went out realm-conquering or whatever. Mostly he just stopped the giants from killing a lot of people and stopped other races from killing one another--however he also got into a fight with Vanaheim, which makes me think that Odin and Frigga were an alliance through marriage (given that Frigga is Vanir).

I really would like to know where the slaves came from, Taika. I really would.

Because:

Vanaheim was equal to Asgard (though the two realms did have a lot of quarrels, they never took one another as slaves, at least in the mythos).

Nornheim only has the 3 Norn sisters living in it protecting the Well of Urd.

Niffelheim is cold and dark and icy and barren; the realm before Helheim.

Helheim is the land of the dead and those who go there (usually) are never to return.

Jotunheim is the land of Frost Giants; and while Odin might have subdued them to keep them from destroying other realms like how the Allies stopped Hitler from destroying other countries), he certainly DIDN’T make them his slaves.

Muspelheim (as we saw) is full of fire-demons and Sutur to rule them.

Midgard was left entirely to its own devices after a few decades of visiting, we can plainly see. Not to mention that Asgardians seem to consider them “weak” and “puny” so they wouldn’t be used as slaves, since the composition of Asgardian matter is probably substantially different compared to Midgardian matter (especially given how Thor and Loki could just rip through Midgardian objects like paper in Avengers: Assemble).

Alfheim is the realm of the Light Elves and ain’t none of them gonna be taken as slaves. They practice M A G I C for crying out loud!

Svartalfheim is the only one that I could maybe probably see as being slave-material, but they got this insane idea to wipe out all of the light in all of the Realms so Bor Odin’s dad if you forgot had to destroy them.

Not for any reason to do with superiority, BUT BECAUSE THEY WERE TRYING TO DESTROY ALL THE REALMS!!!

If you notice a pattern here:

Someone tries to meddle in the affairs of the realms to a harmful extent. Asgard heaves a great heaping sigh and steps in, defeats the threat, and retires to their golden city.

NOWHERE IS THERE COLONIZATION AND INVASION.

The Dark Elves LITERALLY tried to make the light go away.

The Frost Giants LITERALLY tried to wipe out all of Midgard.

Bor (then Odin with the Jotuns) stepped in to protect other realms. Either realms that were weak or realms that simply weren’t aware of the problem (because why cause a panic when you can just deal with the problem? *looking at you, Dark Elves*).

To sum up:

I’ve done the research and nowhere do I see slaves.

Thanks, Taika.

I mean, yes, I’m sure there were slaves somewhere in the Nine Realms, I’m sure it happened. But I think that with all of these realms, with thousands of planets in each realm, and so many of them being “advanced” that the idea of slavery would be mentally slow to them. And of the few planets that were in that number that used slaves, Asgard would certainly not be counted.

Because why the actual solitary hell do we have to have every single fucking universe in fiction be slave-holding? God, that really makes Americans sound like butthurt assholes. I know it’s supposed to be some sort of allegorical symbolism and warnings to not let that stuff happen again and other epicness, but if they really wanted to do that

WE HAD BLOODY SAKAAR TO PUSH THAT MESSAGE.

THERE WAS EVEN AN EGOTISTICAL AMERICAN ACTOR PLAYING THE LEADER OF THAT PLANET.

AND TAIKA MISSED THIS.

Of course he couldn’t make Sakaar unique, no. (What, are you dull? The man has zero imagination!) Waititi had to go and poison Asgardian history with slavery and colonization yada, yada, yada *vomits*. Because he has no imagination and no idea how to write fantasy worlds. Which is clearly defined in his total lack of understanding and ability to embrace the fictional world of Thor.

Waititi couldn’t ever allow himself to really get a good grasp on the universe of Nine Realms, so he made it into a farce. He couldn’t put faith in fantasy so he destroyed it with a blowtorch and kitschy 70s/80s sets that were really garbage bins in disguise. Because he can find a foothold in bad comedy more readily than he can catch on to high-fantasy.

We already know that Asgard has problems. We didn’t need Taika to make that more obvious. It would’ve been nice that instead of saying “oh, heey, lookie, more problems than you thought initially!” he brought SOMETHING NEW to the scene.

Something with substance.

Colonization is nice and all, and a strong allegorical message, surely, but Asgard was doing just fine being bad without that idiotical and unnecessary leap. Thor was feeling like shit about Odin’s kingly choices In The Past without needing to “discover” what he already knew lmao this underworld side of the realm.

It was dramatic enough that Hela is really the first-born in line for the throne. We didn’t need any of that realm-conquering/executioner horseshit to fog up the fishtank.

In all honesty I would’ve loved to learn that Loki was Hela’s son with Laufey but was unsatisfactory so she tried to sacrifice him for more power over killing things but Odin came in, put a stop to the Power Couple of Death and Destruction and saved his grandson, thus giving more validation to the line “your birthright was to die!”

Anyway, I’m out. Most likely to go puke because I’m so very ill and then come back and cringe at this insanely plot-holey post.

[okb-hpolitburo]

Concept Art #03: Phantom Payne

—————————————————————

Codename: Phantom Payne

Real Name: Douglas Bradley Payne Jr.

DOB: 12/08/1948

Sex: Male

Nationality: Japanese-American (Previously thought to be Irish-American)

Age: 38 (As of March, 1987)

Occupation: Mercenary Heavy Weapons Specialist, Interrogator, Project: Phantom Operative (Formerly), Private Eye Detective (Formerly), American G.I. (Formerly), Chicago Police Department Detective (Formerly)

Known Family: Wife (Deceased), Daughter (Deceased), Step-Mother, Father (MIA), Biological Mother (Whereabouts Unknown), Don Salvatore Vermicelli (Handler; Estranged), General Richard Hartley (Commander; Estranged), Nemisis Omen (Employer/Drinking Buddy)

Likes: Omen (To a Degree), Olga (To a Degree), His Step-Mother (To a Degree), Jack Daniels, Fast Women, Machine Guns, Noir Films, Captain Langley Comic Books, Johnny Cash, Humphrey Bogart, the Sound of His Own Voice, Akira Kurosawa Films, Japan in General, Capitalism

Dislikes: Omen (To a Degree), America (To a Degree), His Father, Don Vermicelli, General Hartley, Communism, Vietnam (he was a veteran), Soviet Union, Women who Play Games with Him

Bio: Born in American-occupied Osaka, Japan, to an American G.I. having an affair with a beautiful young Japanese woman who resorted to prostitution upon losing her family in a housefire caused by aerial bombing.

Taken to America upon his father’s demobilisation and placed into the care of his long-suffering Irish-American wife. His father was shortly recalled to Japan for deployment in Korea, but went MIA.

Joined the Chicago Police Department and quickly became a rising star. Married Julia Vermicelli in 1967. They had one child together. Julia and said child were found brutally murdered by an unknown assailant the next year, with Payne being framed for it.

Upon being arrested, was conscripted for service in Vietnam, serving three years until being wounded severely and brought into Project: Phantom, a joint human weapons project conducted by the CIA, US Department of Defence and ARPA. Was codenamed Phantom Payne.

Spent next decade on several assignments around the globe, eventually settling in Little Bedlam in disguise as a Private Eye Detective. Meets Nemisis Omen in 1987, briefly becomes his enemy, but calls a truce with him and joins VOLKODAV when Omen reveals the identity of his wife’s murderer.

Now serves primarily as a Heavy Weapons Specialist, but is also a Specialist in Interrogations. Has a dialect likened to that of Humphrey Bogart, which he is proud of.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

BEHIND THE SCENES

Payne’s usually one of the first of my characters that really catches the eye of those who look through my designs! In fact, when showing a person my designs, they usually stop at Payne, who is only on the third page, point at him and say that he’s their favourite already!

I cannot say I blame them, for on first glance, when you sit Omen and Payne together, many are bound to cite Payne as looking more interesting. To be fair to Omen, I did model him on myself, after all, and in real life, I’m not the most interesting person on the planet. But enough about my inadequacies. Let’s dive right into Payne’s history.

Like several other characters of Nemisis, Payne is yet another of my physical manifestations of certain fashion and lifestyle trends over the last century or so, and this plays a central role in the execution of Nemisis’ plot, a sort-of period piece set during a time of social and economic change across the world.

Payne started life as a send-up to the likes of Dick Tracy and Sam Spade. I had created him during a period of time where I’d go out every Monday night to write short stories and have them torn to pieces by fierce critics for... Existing. Bleak, I know, so I’ll change the channel.

The story he debuted in was so badly-written by my standards of today that I daren’t give even the faintest glimpse of what is was about. But long story short, I wanted to introduce a character that served as an arch-rival for Omen, who worked for the Russians. I wanted to have someone who believed in the American Ideals that set them apart from their Communist neighbours across the Pacific Ocean. Plus, I also wanted someone who dressed similar to Omen.

Around the same time, I was probably playing a lot of L.A. Noire, which I believe still stands the test of time as an experimental masterpiece. Hence, I decided to create a washed-up Private Eye detective, who was so drenched in alcohol that he seemed to be in a semi-hallucinatory state.

Over time, I began to flesh him out a little better. And with that, he went from being an unlikable d-bag to having some more relatability. And with that, his role as a recurring antagonist of Omen fell by the wayside, giving way to him becoming a disillusioned former American human weapon.

To add further flavour to his damaged psyche, I upped his age significantly by about twenty years, thereby making him a Vietnam vet. Coupled to his previous traumatic experiences in Chicago and being a chronic alcoholic served much to turn him into Humphrey Bogart on steroids.

I also designed him physically while trying to replicate the art style of mid-20th century comic books, with the angular features of adult males in those days. Again, Dick Tracy was an inspiration here, but so were the Batman comics of that period. Hence, while Dick Tracy is iconic for dressing in canary, I went with a darker shade of violet for Payne.

Finally, to add a general flavour to his personality, I just added some elements that entered my mind after playing Max Payne on the PlayStation 2. Another top game, I’m sure you’ll agree.

What you get is possibly the first proper ‘Tearjerker’ of the series, of which there are several more to come. But Payne is OG. Always has, always will. But that doesn’t mean that Payne’s a completely depressing bloke. Far from it. The fact that he forever sounds like Humphrey Bogart, especially when he is a given to break out in a Sam Spade-esque monologue certainly does much to confuse and irritate some of his comrades.

He’s especially a frequent nuisance to Olga, and the two butt heads regularly over their different personalities. Payne’s somewhat misguided misogyny certainly does much to piss her off! XD

The more eagle-eyed of you will have noticed the double entendre surrounding his name. Of course, Phantom is the US equivalent to Projekt: NEMISIS. And quite frankly, people might think I’ve ripped off Max Payne by the use of his last name. But there was a more genuine reason behind this.

Amputees often suffer from a psychological condition called ‘Phantom Limb’. It means that they can feel their lost limbs, and from what I’ve read, that sounds really painful. Now, while Payne himself lost no limbs in Vietnam, he did lose his respect for the Americans, especially for their actions against Vietnamese civilians akin to massacre.

This sentiment of disillusionment possibly stems from his hatred of his father and his Japanese heritage, for his birth mother lost everything to an American bombing raid. 

Therefore, it could be quite reasonable to assume that he assumed the title of ‘Phantom Payne’, not only due to Payne being his family name, which he would have otherwise had changed by deed poll, but also due to a strong sense of loss regarding his place in normal society.

Again, this was one of my earliest attempts at introducing philosophical themes into Nemisis, and I’m in fact quite proud of this. Therefore, it stays. As Nemisis progresses, I also aim to explore Payne’s Japanese heritage, and with it a whole new slew of storytelling possibilities. 

And that’s pretty much about it. All I have to say after writing all of this is that I did so while listening to American Pie by Don McLean on repeat. You too should do so while reading this. But then, if you’ve made it here, it’s probably already too late.

[surveysonfleek]

746.

5000 Question Survey Pt. 47

4501. Who do you feel on shaky grounds with? anyone who’s acting suspicious or uneasy. 4502. How would you rate Stephen King as a writer? i’ve never read any of his books tbh. 4503. What movie are you looking forward to? ocean’s eight! 4504. Hulk Hogan with or without the bandana? i can’t even imagine him without one. 4505. Do you more often tell people what you feel or what you think? both, i think they work hand in hand.

4506. Have you been to see an opera? no, i wouldn’t mind seeing it though. 4507. What do you wish that you knew with more certainty? what the future will bring. or at least what direction it’ll take. 4508. Does your heart break and break and live by breaking? no. 4509. Can you tell the difference between what you think and what you feel or do you often get them confused? nope. 4510. Do you feel like there are a lot of referances in this survey that you are not getting? yeah, it’s lame. a lot of grammatical errors too. 4511. You are shopping in the Mad Mall for things to add to your room. Of the following list, what 5 things will you buy? lollipops, lace up boots, bondage gear, bubblegum machine, a miniature orange grove, house plants, Bob Geldof, duct tape, Buzzcocks, poet shirts, Marc Almond, Al Gore, acrylic paints, Snoopy's dog house, an original andy warhol painting, zippers, orange and pink matching curtains and bed spread, flash, oj simpson, a slurpee maker, some flutes, electric chairs, feather pillows, post it notes, the terminator wax statue, fight club the movie, fight club the book an original andy warhol painting, snoopy’s dog house, feather pillows, slurpee machine and house plants. 4512. Of the following things, which would you most like to have more of? drink, dreams, bed, drugs, lust, lies, hate, love, fear, fun, pain, flesh, stars, smiles, fame, sex bed, love, love, smiles, sex. 4513. Your preference. David Bowie or Marc Bolan? bowie. 4514. Who'd win in a fight, Morrissey or Robert Smith? idk either of them enough to choose. 4515. Earth girls are: what are earth girls? 4516. One of your friends tells you they are going to train to become a cop. your reaction? i’d be supportive and congratulate them. 4517. Would you ever consider working for the government? i would, they get really good benefits here. 4518. What are the best and wort television channels? i hardly watch tv. 4519. If you had a magicle pencil and everything you drew became real what would you draw? money!! 4520. Your boots were made for: walking. 4521. What movie would you like to see a mystery science theater episode about (even if it isn't a sci fi movie, just one that needs making fun of)? idk... 4522. What's the buzz? nothing. 4523. The last person you would want to be stranded on a desert island with is: someone i hate. 4524. Your partner takes an aeroplane trip. the plane disappears and is never found. How long do you wait for them to return before you begin looking for a new partner? i couldn’t put a time limit on it. i might not even move on, who knows. 4525. Soma animals that mate for life can literally die of grief if their mate is captured or dies. How many humans would do that do you think? it’s definitely possible for other humans to do this. 4526. What would you like to touch? the biggest diamond in the world. 4527. Does anything you own glow in the dark? nail polish. 4528. Would you rather ride a dragon or a unicorn? dragon. 4529. Do things just always go right for you? hell no. 4530. What's the best nick toon? hey arnold. 4531. Can you make a balloon animal? nope :( 4532. Would you undress at a nude beach? no. 4533. Wherever there's a secret recipe, there is someone who wants to steal it. True or false? i guess that’s the allure of calling it a secret recipe. 4534. What is today but yesterday's tommorrow? the present. 4535. Are you more like spongebob who does nothing right but still everything good happens to or like squidworth who tries to do things right and ends up having nothing good happen to him? squidworth. 4536. How many glasses of water do you drink each day? aiming for the usual 8. 4537. What is the difference between intelectualism and pretentiosness? being pretentious obviously just means you think you’re better/smarter than the people you’re with. 4538. What do you like in a poem, accessability, crypticness or somethin in between? i hate poems. 4539. What do you think of William Blake? Is his writing difficult to understand? never read his stuff. 4540. Has learning to spell become obsolete? not at all. but in this survey, yes omg... 4541. Who do you find yourself in constant conflict with? Why the conflict? me. 4542. What is the difference between literature and hallmark cards? everything lol. 4543. How many contemporary poets can you name? none. 4544. What subjects do you refuse to talk about? Why are you hiding from them? i’m open to talking about anything as long as it’s with the right people. 4545. Are you every parent's wet dream? ew, no. 4546. Everyone starts in the garden of Eden but no one can stay there. Why not? idk. 4547. Would you want to join a club that would have you as a member? sure. 4548. Greatest black and white film: i haven’t watched many in my time tbh. 4549: Greatest film three hours or longer: titanic, duhhhh. 4550. No means.. no. 4551. When you are exposed to the artwork (poetry, painting etc) of a friend, family member or aquantance how likly are you to criticize it? if i know them well i’d give them constructive criticism. i don’t think i’d bash the work of someone i didn’t know. 4552. Do you mentally reject people? Before speaking to them? some days i just check out i guess. 4553. Are we already living out 1984? no. 4554. Sing, now!  What did you sing? Can you sing? Are you the next american idol? no, no, i’m not american. 4555. Do you like the feeling of a ball point pen being used to draw pictures on your palm? no lol. 4556. Have you ever been airbrushed? no. 4557. Are you an alitist? What are you elitist about? lol let’s not go there. 4558. Are you arrogant? About what? i’m arrogant towards arrogant people, does that count?  4558. Use the two following words in a sentance: ghandi, ford no. 4559. Are you trecherous? no. 4560. Nam the ten bands you are the biggest fan of: Name the ten bands who are your biggest fans: no. 4561. Are you jolly? not really. 4562. What does the world stop for? nothing. anything could happen and in some places it’ll just be business as usual. 4563. Would you like to reapolster your furniture in camoflauge? no thanks. 4564. Would you rather have your own personal live in massuse or a new car? personal live in masseuse that also cooks haha. 4565. What were you born holding? nothing. 4566. Big nose, is it ugly or does it give the face character? depends if it works with the other features of the face. 4567. Name three things you would NOT do, even for one million dollars (tax free): 1 kill a human, 2 eat a human. 3 kill someone’s pet 4568. Who has rejected you? Who have you rejected? certain jobs. 4569. Natural body odor or perfumes and colognes? perfumes and colognes! 4570. Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ss. 4571. Who frolics in the autumn mist in a land called honalee? lol. 4572. Is anything nastier as a snack than fruit roll ups? shit i guess. 4573. When you hear someone make a joke about something will you later make the same joke to someone else as if you had just thought it up? my boyfriend always does this lol. i hardly ever do it, i’m pretty forgetful. What if someone just says something intelligent, would you use what they said later as if you had made it up? no, if i repeat this i’ll always the credit the person that told me. 4574. What's on your pajamas? plain colours. 4575. Are people nicer in new york or california? i’m guessing california. 4576. Ever think about moving to Alaska to live as a hermit? i’d love to do it temporarily. 4577. You are interested in a potential mate who is already attatched. Do you encourage him or her to leave their current catch or try to find someone all alone? no way. i’d never try and break up a couple. 4578. Do you play in the snow? haven’t done so in about ten years. 4579. Do you save a snowball in your freezer to hit someone with in the summer time? no lol. ouch. 4580. What bible storiy would you like to see acted out by animated veggetables? What vegetable would play jesus? idk. 4581. Will you be ready for the next alien attack? the next? has there already been one? 4582. You can't make this easy can you? nope. 4583. What is a small thing that people let slide but that actually has dire consequenses? cheating. 4584. Are you the open window maniac? no? 4585. Have you ever been a hall monitor?  What exactly do hall monitors do anyway? nope, never had one in my school either. 4586. Would you rather wear an army uniform or a cow costume for halloween? cow lol. 4587. When was the last timeyou played tag, musical chairs, hide and seek etc? as a kid. 4588. Can you leap frog? i haven’t tried in years. maybe! 4589. What was the lost strong and clear emotion yo felt? idk... 4590. Are you more of a disco ball, a candle or a robot? candle. 4591. Could any good come out of a nuclear holocaust? i’m not the right person to ask. 4592. Are you an angel in disguise? no, i wish. 4593. Could you have fun with ajelly fish? for 12 hours? no thanks. 4594. Who throws the wildest parties? it used to be this one guy i know. and then we all grew up. 4595. Do you own an I <3 NY shirt? yes. 4596. If you could make a channel that played only one show all day what show would it be? the office. or the simpsons. anything with a ton of episodes and is funny. 4597. Are you a rockstar only no one knows it yet? no. 4598. have you ever been stung by anything? What? nope. 4599. Who's autograph have you gotten in the last year? no one. i feel like selfies with celebrities are more popular now than autographs. 4600. Are you enjoying this? no.

[aion-rsa]

The Conjuring 2’s Enfield Case: A True Story That Still Haunts Us Today

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Lorraine Warren has seen true evil at the start of The Conjuring 2 and wants to call it quits — at least for a while — but when the Hodgson family finds itself under siege by a terrible haunting, the paranormal investigators have no choice but to help. Set in the late ’70s in the London Borough of Enfield, The Conjuring 2 ticks off many of the same boxes as the original: haunted house, demonic possession, and a relentless pace full of jump scares that doesn’t let up until the Warrens are back in their spooky museum, locking away their latest ghostly trinket just before the credits roll.

And like the first movie, which is based on the real-life investigations of demonologist Ed Warren and the clairvoyant Lorraine, The Conjuring 2 is heavily inspired by a true story, one that captured the attention of British tabloids — and even the BBC — just as Jay Anson’s The Amityville Horror was hitting bookshelves. The film nods to Amityville, the Warrens’ most famous case, in its opening scene, and later ties it to Enfield through the recurring “Nun” demon Valak.

But there was no demon in the real Enfield case but a poltergeist, a malicious spirit that haunts people through physical disturbances such as shuffling things around a room, levitating its victims, or banging on doors at night. And in the film, the Warrens, who tag along with British paranormal investigators Maurice Grosse and Anita Gregory, do suspect a troublesome spirit before the third act reveal that there’s actually something demonic behind the creepy ghost of Bill Wilkins.

The real-life Hodgson family began experiencing poltergeist activity in their Enfield home in 1977. At first, Peggy, a single mother of four, didn’t believe her daughters Janet, 11, and Margaret, 12, when they told her the chest of drawers in their bedroom was moving on its own. But when the chest slammed against the door, locking Peggy out of the girls’ room and forcing her to run to her neighbors for help, she was convinced.

Peggy called the police, and like in the movie, a constable reported that “a large armchair moved, unassisted, 4 ft across the floor,” according to the Daily Mail. The police officers’ quick exit from the house is played for laughs in the film, but a terrified Peggy Hodgson probably wasn’t laughing at all.

The disturbances only got worse from there. The Hodgsons reportedly suffered all manner of strange happenings in the house for the next 18 months, including furniture being overturned, toys being thrown, banging noises, writing appearing on the walls, and even levitating children. In 2012, Janet told iTV (via People) that cups would inexplicably fill with water, things would randomly burst into flame, and that disembodied voices would speak to them, too.

According to Janet, “The most frightening [encounter] was when a curtain wrapped itself around my neck next to my bed.”

Peggy eventually turned to the press for help, reaching out to the Daily Mirror. The tabloid sent a photographer, Graham Morris, to the house to capture the hauntings, and that’s when all hell broke loose. The Enfield case might be one of the best documented paranormal cases in history, thanks to Morris’ disturbing pictures of his visit to the Hodgson house.

Among these images is a photo of Janet being tossed across her bedroom by the poltergeist while her sister Margaret watches in horror. As you might suspect if you’ve watched The Conjuring 2, it’s very possible that the picture is staged, Janet leaping off her bed and onto the floor, but we can only go by Morris’ account here, and he seemed convinced.

“It was chaos, things started flying around, people were screaming,” Morris said of his visit, according to the Daily Mail.

The Daily Mirror and the Hodgsons next called the paranormal investigators of the Society of Psychical Research, including Maurice Grosse and Anita Gregory, along with Guy Lyon Playfair, who isn’t depicted in the movie.

“When I first got there, nothing happened for a while. Then I experienced Lego pieces flying across the room, and marbles, and the extraordinary thing was, when you picked them up they were hot,” Grosse told writer Will Storr about the first days of his investigation (via the Daily Mail). “I was standing in the kitchen and a T-shirt leapt off the table and flew into the other side of the room while I was standing by it.”

Then the poltergeist decided to speak.

As in the movie, the ghost of Bill Wilkins reached out to the investigators through Janet, a raspy voice emanating from the little girl while her “lips hardly seemed to be moving.” The spirit told Grosse and Playfair that it had died of a hemorrhage in the living room. Investigators later confirmed with Wilkins’ son that a man by that name had indeed died in the house many years before, according to Daily Mail.

In the video below, you can hear Wilkins’ supposed voice for yourself:

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There were skeptics from the start, of course, and the debate around the Enfield case continues today. Even Playfair observed in his case notes that Wilkins generally “refused to speak unless the girls were alone in the room with the door closed” and that the Hodgson children were “motivated to add to the activity with some tricks of their own.” Playfair wrote that when Janet knew cameras were on, nothing seemed to happen. But Grosse and Playfair were believers.

Anita Gregory concluded that the case was overrated, and many skeptics accused the Hodgson family of making up the haunting for fame or financial gain. At different points, the investigators caught the girls bending spoons themselves and banging on ceilings with broom handles. Like in the movie, catching the girls in the act seemed to be enough for Gregory and others to close the case.

In 1980, Janet admitted to iTV (via Daily Mail): “Oh yeah, once or twice [we faked phenomena], just to see if Mr. Grosse and Mr. Playfair would catch us. They always did.” Just ahead of the movie’s release, Janet told Daily Mail that only “two percent” of the occurrences were faked.

But what about the other 98 percent? Many other investigators outside of the SPR visited the Hodgson house in those 18 months, including the Warrens. While Ed and Lorraine didn’t have to save the kids from any demonic nuns in real life, whatever they did see while at the house seemed to convince them that supernatural forces were indeed at work.

“Those who deal with the supernatural day in and day out know the phenomena are there – there’s no doubt about it,” Ed said of the Hodgson case, according to People.

Meanwhile, a magician named Milbourne Christopher dropped by to check things out, and said the activity was the work of “a little girl who wanted to cause trouble and who was very, very clever.” Ray Alan, a ventriloquist, said Janet was playing tricks with Bill’s voice because she enjoyed the attention.

By 1979, the tabloids had moved on from the Hodgsons, while the experts couldn’t agree on a logical explanation. Despite the movie’s happy ending, the real-life case was never truly closed. Janet told Daily Mail in 2015 that things began to “quiet down” in the fall of 1978 when a priest visited the house. But the next family that moved in reported strange incidents too, including hearing voices downstairs and encountering a man walking into rooms. They only lived in the house for two months, according to Daily Mail.

Years later, Janet called the events she lived through in that house traumatic, revealing she had a “short spell” at a psychiatric hospital and that she was bullied at school, where her classmates called her “Ghost Girl.” She told Daily Mail that her mother also had a nervous breakdown. It’s not surprising, then, that Janet “wasn’t very happy to hear about the film” being made about the Enfield case, as it dug up old memories she’d hoped to leave behind when she moved out of the house at age 16.

But The Conjuring 2 wasn’t the first to dramatize the events of the Enfield case. The BBC’s controversial 1992 mockumentary Ghostwatch took a rather different approach. Disguised as a special live investigation of a haunted house on Halloween night, the 90-minute program was hosted by real-life broadcaster Michael Parkinson and featured several other TV presenters to lend it an air of credibility. The mockumentary even had a call-in number viewers could dial into to share their own ghost stories.

While the reporters are highly skeptical of the hauntings at first, strange things begin to happen that become more difficult to explain as the film progresses, and Ghostwatch crescendos when the reporters and their paranormal expert realize they’ve fallen prey to a very real poltergeist. The terrifying final scene of the film proved so controversial that the BBC received thousands of complaints after the airing as well as calls from frightened viewers who thought the program was real. The BBC never aired Ghostwatch again, although you can now find it on the Internet Archive. Today, the film is considered a cult classic among horror enthusiasts.

But in the end, The Conjuring 2 and Ghostwatch are just two more chapters in a story that continues to fascinate believers and skeptics alike more than 40 years later. And despite the many attempts to investigate the case or dramatize it, no one but the Hodgsons will ever know what truly happened inside that house in Enfield.

The post The Conjuring 2’s Enfield Case: A True Story That Still Haunts Us Today appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[10oclockdot]

True/False 2017 Festival Report, part 2:

in which I give capsule reviews of films that I viewed on March 4 and 5, the last two days of this year's True/False, in order of best to worst. Part 1 here.

The War Show (Andreas Dalsgaard, Obaidah Zytoon, 2016) Imagine Five Broken Cameras, but in Syria. Mix in a deeply wise coming-of-age story that tragically spirals into a tale of existential perdition with poetic voice-over to rival The House is Black and ending with the most clear-throated call for piece I've heard in ages. That's The War Show, and that description doesn't do justice to this rich, multi-modal, and severely underappreciated film. It all begins with Obaidah Zytoon, a young woman who liked shooting home movies with her friends (and who became the film's director), playing forbidden music as a DJ on a Syrian radio station. "Going on air was like dancing in a mine field," she recalls. As the anti-Assad protests begin, she films the people marching with her. "I'm doing it to breathe," says a kid named Nawarah. A bevy of catchy chants fill the air with the bracing spirit of revolution. And so we meet her exuberant friends -- Houssam, her lover, Lulu, a friend who removes her hijab for the first time, Hisham, Lulu's boyfriend and a poet, and more. But even as their spirits remain high and the crowds swell, "demonstrations turned into funerals," she tells us. Journalists are targeted, the country's "senses polluted" by the ensuing flow of disinformation. "No one raised in Syria can define freedom," says one of her comrades. Dozens of locals show off scars left by torture at the hands of the Assad regime. The friends take one final trip, and then, out of nowhere, they start to be arrested, kidnapped, houses destroyed, one is even killed, the halcyon opening smashed. As the film goes on and the madness of the conflict spirals ever farther away from believability, I found myself lost -- I didn't know where we were, when we were, or what to believe. Intelligently, the film doesn't attempt an encyclopedic or journalistic account of the conflict -- it would be impossible as yet anyway -- so what we're left with are fragments that we can barely situate or hold onto. Scenes of destruction, of protests and counter-protests between those wanting democracy and those wanting a caliphate, children playing with unsafed rifles, and, of course, an inside look into how a revolution gets co-opted by warlords and arms dealers, each staging some unreality for YouTube to further their financial cause. "There was a place for everyone in the war show," Obaidah explains, "except for the people." Many moments of brilliance follow after this, but it culminates in the very final scene of the film, just as a felt most poetically and tragically lost (which, of course, is the point). After years of prison, a disappeared friend returns unexpectedly, reconciling the lives of the few friends who remain. "Syria as we know it is gone," she intones, but kneels over a clay pot, gathering soil and planting seeds, and she says of the Syrian people, "We will plant the seed of peace around the planet." And there it is: the powerful, beautiful, perfect message of The War Show -- that the Syrian diaspora is, contrary to what every xenophobic isolationist asshole has ever said, the greatest peace movement of the 21st Century. Because the Syrian people, each scarred by the madness of their country's war, will carry the scars of that war their entire lives, scars that will always speak to the necessity of peace, wherever they live and as long as they live. It's an essential message and an essential film.

Brimstone and Glory (Viktor Jakovleski, 2017) I guess that in the back of my mind, I knew that documentary could be pure spectacle -- what, after all, are IMAX documentaries? -- but I never imagined I'd spend fully half of a feature length documentary leaning forward, mouth agape, absolutely in awe of the visceral madness taking place in front of me. Brimstone and Glory is a documentary about fireworks -- specifically the absolutely bonkers annual fireworks festival in Tultepec, Mexico, where half the buildings in town are labeled "Peligro" (they build the fireworks there, year-round), where they erect hundred-foot-high towers of fireworks (castles of fire, they call them) and where they build sculptures of bulls the size of buses and run them through downtown, shooting fireworks off of them into crowds of thrill-seeking and oft-injured spectators. Director Viktor Jakovleski spent went three years in a row, shooting with drone cameras, an arsenal of Go-Pro's, and cinematographers covered head-to-toe in protective gear diving headlong into the middle of the mayhem. Add to that eruptive sound design, sharp editing, and a driving original score co-written by Behn Zeitlin (the guy who directed and wrote the music for Beasts of the Southern Wild), and you've got one of the best adrenaline rushes you can get sitting still in a seat. Best moment: as they're setting up the castles of fire, lightning strikes one of them, setting it alight. Cut to the perspective of a Go-Pro mounted on a man's head whose job it is to rapidly scale the wooden tower without a safety harness and put things in order. Damn.

Manifesto (Julian Rosefeldt, 2017) Extreme close-up, shallow-focus, ultra-slow-motion: a fuse burns across the screen, sending sparks in all directions while Cate Blanchett quotes some delicious gobbledegook from Tristan Tzara's Dada Manifesto, culminating with, "I am neither for nor against and I do not explain because I hate common sense." Thus began a film that refused common sense and did not explain itself. Cut to old women shooting off fireworks over some abandoned Eastern bloc factory or weather station. As a drone camera flies over the tumbledown complex, we find Cate Blanchett, dressed as a shabby character that recalls Denis Lavant's Monsieur Merde, dragging a suitcase through the ruins and quoting Marx. In a flash, the opening credits are a barrage: huge white block letters on a black background, the names of artists and thinkers who wrote manifestos, each on screen for about a third of a second, like a stripped-down Enter the Void. The ensuing 90-minute film follows Blanchett as she dons a dozen different disguises in a dozen different environments -- from a puppet shop to a garbage processing facility to an anechoic chamber, all brilliantly photographed -- and speaks excerpts from a few dozen manifestos from across the last century and a half. To be clear, this is not a documentary. In fact, it began as a 13-channel video installation that editor Bobby Good transformed into a feature. Though most of the audience was probably befuddled and confused about the origin of these words (the film does not caption the quotations), they were generally amused by the absurdity of deterritorializing the tone of the manifesto into more quotidian environments (a highlight: Blanchett as a news anchor conversing with Blanchett as a field reporter in a rainstorm). I enjoyed the handsome cinematography and the Nils Frahm score, but I had the most fun whenever I recognized the origin of the words: Maciunas, Lewitt, Jarmusch, Brakhage, and a few others. As for the words I didn't recognize ("Equal rights for all materials," "One dies as a hero or an idiot, which is the same thing," "Elephants are very big and cars go very fast, but so what?"), I looked a bunch of them up and learned something. A nice provocation of a film. Perfect for screening the last week of a class on avant-garde art history.

Distant Constellation (Shevaun Mizrahi, 2017) A lovely, slow-moving film made of lovely slow-moving and somewhat haunting images. The whole is not greater than the sum of its parts, making it a film that's not especially worth seeking out, but a few of the images will probably stick with me. In Istanbul, languid shots of a building under construction intercut with languider scenes of life in a retirement home. It all seems to take place neither in the past, nor the present, nor the future, but a place disconnected from time, where the overworked young build a future that won't happen while the un-visited old disappear from a past equally unreachable. Two old men ride up and down on an elevator in order to have a private conversation with each other. A very old woman who insists on being known by a pseudonym (Selma) falls asleep in the middle of an interview. One old codger, not without some charm, recounts the sexual exploits of his youth before proposing marriage to the director, saying she'll surely outlive him, which would make the marriage to her advantage. A stopped clock labeled USSR sits next to a working Western one. An old woman complains that now she walks too slowly to make it all the way across the street while the walk sign is on. The rhythms of the modern world aren't kind to everyone, but as tales of the Armenian genocide reveal, perhaps the world was never all that kind. So this constellation drifts on, and fades away.

Still Tomorrow (Fan Jian, 2016) A woman with cerebral palsy living in a remote Chinese village writes a poem that gets shared a million times on Chinese Facebook and scores her a book deal. That sounds like a good hook for a documentary, but the film lacks a clear shape or direction. For the most part, Yu Xiuhua spends the film not charismatically soaking up her newfound fame (though there's a bit of that, and it's really fun), but rather fighting with and divorcing a husband she's never loved. That focus feels strange until you notice that the poetry isn't really the object of investigation here, but rather the abuse which lower-class disabled people suffer in exchange for a caregiver. Sadly, this theme receives scant development. Still, there's plenty of her lovely poetry on display. "Silent wheat in the moonlight / the frictions between them / are the trembling of all the things of the earth." Here the image shows a wheatfield near her home. It's a choice not entirely without grace, but when a documentary's images cannot stand alongside its subject's words, the project falters.

Lindy Lou, Juror #2 (Florent Vassault, 2017) I desperately wanted to like this film. Lindy Lou served on a jury two decades ago that sent a murderer to death row. There's no doubt the man was guilty, but in the intervening years Lindy Lou has come to deeply regret this decision. So she and the documentarian travel around Mississippi tracking down her fellow jurors and finding out whether any of them changed their minds. It's a clear spine with clear motivation and all, but the structure ends up deeply limiting the film, since many of the people she goes to talk to aren't all that interesting people to talk to. The film was at its best when one of the jurors who'd also felt pangs of guilt years later suggests that their ought to be a state-funded counseling service for jurors who have to do such work. In the Q&A after the film, Lindy Lou, who was there in person, suggested that the trauma experienced by jurors on such cases was a bit like the trauma experienced by soldiers -- and she ought to know, she's a veteran herself. But she made the mistake of mentioning the film American Sniper to the fairly liberal crowd at T/F, which drew a couple of muted snarls from people seated near me. And in that moment I realized that even if Lindy Lou's on the right side of the death penalty debate, the Confederate flag flying on her property and her husband's gun enthusiasm (both depicted in the film) put her in such a different world from many of the folks in the audience that effective bipartisan collaboration might be impossible. I rarely learn more from the Q&A than from the film, but that was the case here.

[le-koko-butter-blog]

BBC Sherlock Tinhatting Masterpost

I can’t believe I’m John Watson-ing this shit--that or Andersoning it. The reason I will stick to the former is because of all the emotional damage The Final Problem has done to me but mostly to the LGBT+ audience of the show. Regardless of whether there is a 4th episode or not, they hurt many people deeply. Some of you other fans who are curiously strolling through the sherlock tag or even the johnlock tag are baffled by the depth in which this episode upset people. Many of you are suggesting that people are overreacting. Although I plan to address this later, at the moment, I would like to say, please try to have a little empathy before resorting to condescension. Try to see WHY in the first place it mattered to them instead of assuming that in no way whatsoever can a tv show possibly mean that much. With that being said, I’m going to make a list of all the evidence suggesting some sort of trick—or rather plan. I can’t believe I’m about to kick my own goddamn balls and go through with this. Believe me, I’m generally rather rational.

 Something comforting about the number 3. First off, when this line was said, it was hilarious. I honestly believed for a second that Sherlock shoved a recording device up his bootyhole. John’s disappointment only added to this. It made more logical sense than the off chance that John would leave his cane. At any rate, many were theorizing what this line means. Naturally, it caused people to think that there was possibly a 4th Holmes. Even then, many thought this suggested a 4th episode. The reason why this line is important is not only the amount of screen time it was given, but the cadence in which it was delivered. No one who was actively sitting there missed this. In place of this line, Sherlock could easily have said something more pertinent to the point of the episode, Sherlock’s aim to get John back in action (not my words. Lame explanation really for it was actually about). In prior episodes such as TAB, John is always neglected as a player by the villains. His importance is never considered. Sherlock could have said instead: “Oh but Mr. Smith, you’re forgetting the one thing that really matters, the true feature of interest, the irreplaceable Dr. Watson.” Maybe that’s a bit too cheesy and something better would do but something along those lines would make more sense in regards to the cane and would add scaffolding to the theme of John’s importance.·         

Plot holes. Alright. Much has been written about the hilarity of the plot holes. There are so many, so big and so frequent the entire Spanish Armada could have sailed through them unscathed which is certainly more than what can be said of Moffat’s and Gattiss’ reputation after TFP. The plot holes are so glaring that it defies logic that not one single person  on set could not have mentioned this. It’s almost as if they were deliberate. 1 or 2 is an accident. 5 is just a regular ol’ network tv show on FOX. But 80? I’m not even being hyperbolic. There might actually be at least 80 plot holes. I’m going to point out the chain one because it would need a special set up. Now as I write this I’ve only ever seen TFP once, mostly because I can’t bring my brain to consume it so soon afterwards in fear of cerebral hemorrhaging. From what I recall, we are given a close up of John’s chained foot. First off, this would suggest that at one point, the well was drained and a chain somehow installed…but never mind that. To film it, the camera would have to be dangerously close to the water if not somewhat submerged. This probably happened in another room, set up to look like the well and if that’s the case, more work would be involved. The amount of work only to have the rope thrown down there makes no sense. Even a goddamn idiot would have remembered that. It would have taken effort. It would have been hard. At least harder than not doing it. I mean as the audience, we’re not expecting a 45 year old Dr. Watson to scale the curved walls of a slick well. Maybe the Chinese ninja guy from the blind banker but still.·         

Parody of itself. After the episode I was hurt. I was angry. And I was lashing out. I stepped back and listened to myself. Everything I was saying was exactly the things the prior episodes of Sherlock could be accused of by those, to say it not so politely, more boring viewers. Remember the Bond critic, the one Gattiss wrote a poem to rebuff? To give an example, there was too much improbable action: the stealing of the fishing boat, the taking over of the asylum, the transplanting from one location to another in an unreasonable time frame, the surviving the blast. Sherlock is too athletic, too badass. Certainly, Sherlock in the previous episodes can be accused of this. Sherlock can win in a sword fight like in the one in TBB as well as do calculus in his head? Please. But as fans, we understood that this was part of the fun. Sherlock Holmes has always been a super hero, he might even have been the first ever. His level of intellect is his super power. It’s mere existence is unlikely. But that is storytelling. If we wanted reality, we would watch Forensic Files (I love that show btw but all the more reason to contrast it). In addition, the disguises were downright stupid. Funny. But stupid. Mycroft looked like an evil child eating fisherman and Sherlock, dainty, dandy little Sherlock with the Renaissance curls hulked down a corridor doing an impressive impression of Frankenstein’s monster all the while mimicking an awful Scottish (?) accent. The only time we are given an actual disguise (my memory may be off) on the part of Sherlock was the French waiter. But when they did that in TEH, it was cute and playful. This was random, weird, and confusing. But then again, I can only imagine how someone who is inclined to be defensive of their own intellect and willing to dislike Sherlock because of it, would lap up that scene and mock the show for it despite it’s charm and humor.·         

The Reichenbach Fall. I’ve alluded to this in another post and in some of the evidence for the above points and in no way am I the originator of this idea. But The Reichenbach Fall is perfect allusion to what Gattiss and Moffat are doing to their show. The sincere fans are terribly hurt. But the critics. Don’t think for a moment the critics are enjoying themselves. For years some viewers of the show must have resented BBC Sherlock because of it’s almost condescending cleverness. It presents it’s hero and it’s plot as being so much smarter than everyone else. In TRF Sherlock warns John about this. I may be wrong but he says this outside of the reporter’s house when met with Moriarty’s actor disguise. People want Sherlock to be a fake. They don’t want to think that someone can be so much smarter than them. They are more than willing to believe in his downfall. Now, if I am right about this and the aluminum isn’t fucking with my brain as this horned hat sits on my head, this stunt would take massive guts. Hell, it might even make television history. (how can they possibly pull this off?) I have seen in many posts people commenting on the interviews Mofftiss and the other showrunners have done. One of them says that it’s almost as if they never knew them. Hell, maybe they are dicks. But it’s like character assassination nevertheless, especially after that disgusting one about Molly. No one can be that thick. Well, unless you’re Donald Trump. How is this consistent with the same people who wrote that beautiful speech Sherlock gave at John’s wedding? How? Now, I’m not sure where we, the tinhatters stand as either John Watson or Anderson (What the fuck is his first name?) We’re standing at the proverbial grave site of this amazing show, asking it the most ludicrous question. Please don’t be dead. Just don’t. Don’t be like this. Come back, give us more. Fix this. We’re sitting there chugging coffee and devouring a 2 pound bag sour patch kids on 4 hours of sleep writing mad theories on the internet, tweeked out and heartbroken. Maybe the healthy thing would to go out and marry an assassin who we thought all along was a cat loving nurse. Maybe there are some Lestrades out there. The blessed normal ones who are just hurt. But to my defense, the theories presented in The Empty Hearse, especially in it’s first sequence is tame by comparison to anything that happened in The Final Problem. I’m not being dramatic when I say that. Those who liked the episode, please just for a moment think about what you are told to believe to have happened in TFP and ask even in the Sherlock universe, is this possible?·         

Literary allusions. I cannot be credited with any of these. But they certainly are not random. Musgrave , Oscar Wilde and the Importance of Being Ernest, and Arthur Conan Doyle’s The Final Problem . These aren’t random. They are deliberate.·      

The Projector, the Clue at the Beginning of Season 4 and the Nature of the Detective Story. Link. Alright. Now, I’m not particularly a fan of detective fiction. I do like some. When I was younger, I was much like Hermione Granger and I liked to solve the puzzles myself, thinking how I am oh so clever. I was insufferable but to on to the point; the set up of a detective story is generally that a mystery must be solved (murder usually), am I wrong? A good detective writer does not only create tension and drama and stakes (if you want, you can credit TFP with having these things. I think that’s awfully generous of you if you do though). A good detective writer leaves enough clues for the reader/viewer to be able to solve the puzzle on their own if they are really clever. If they are not but still get a tickle out of it, they would have much the same reaction as the guy with the Japanese tattoo in T6T. Oh its so simple when you put it that way! Oh of course! Now BBC Sherlock isn’t perfect. They aren’t Agatha Christie or anything but it’s never too far off. I’m sure some of you were able to solve the cases on your own or at least see how it’s possible when you rewatch. Some things that they fail to give us closeups of aren’t fair. But I’ll get off it. What I am trying to say is. TFP was NOT A DETECTIVE STORY. It was a thriller/horror? There was no possible way we could have solved any of it. Not at all. Now some of you may point to the song. In my defense, which is an easy one I might add, is that for one, we are not allowed to actually hear the song in its entirety and even if we were, the gravestones ARE NOT A VIABLE OPTION. I repeat. THEY ARE NOT A VIABLE OPTION. Why Ms. Koko Butter? Because the gravestones are noted to be strange. There was something wrong about them to begin with. It was this weirdness which supposedly alerts Sherlock. But why should they be weird? TFP says that the dates aren’t historically possible (which can be said about the events of the episode). The gravestones exist before the murder of Redbeard. Now why on earth would a historically inaccurate graveyard exist anyway? Are we to assume that the Holmes are just freaks and be done with it? Sorry, not buying that. Especially since so many of Sherlock’s deductions in prior episodes are supported by the probability of human behavior consistent along the lines of what is considered a normal sequence of action. Now, the other option is that the little girl put them there herself. I’m sorry. Even if she were one of those creepy baby geniuses in Twilight, she could not physically have done it without alerting her parents. Certainly Mycroft who is older and smarter than Sherlock would have known about this. Are you to tell me that he wouldn’t act on it? Loyalty to Eurus does not matter since he betrays her. Are you telling me that through some line of reasoning, he wouldn’t do the thing that is the most obvious thing in the world to anyone which is check the well. And if he did, he wouldn’t be decent enough to remove the poor child’s remains and give them to his family? Alright, I’m digressing. What I am saying is, this song, like all the other puzzles presented to Sherlock in TFP are more along the lines of SAW than a detective story. But we know that Sherlock the show, is in some ways, still a detective show that has actual cases the viewers can solve. In this line of reasoning with my tin hat on, I present TFP as evidence. Many great detective stories start immediately with a HUGE clue. In the episode dealing with Magnussen he LITERALLY says what his vaults really are. Within a few minutes in, surrounded by the heads of the British government, he says to them that he has a good memory. BAM. There it is. The clue. The vaults are his mind palace. Kinda lame but I’m cool. Still love it. We’re still golden. Season 4 starts off with the doctoring of footage. It’s weird too because Sherlock is prancing around, high on life. Why? WHY?! This is unlike him even if we think we consider that he is happy to be back in England (if I didn’t know any better I would think John had just kissed him and all that oxytocin was pumping him with a natural high and making him sing out like character in musical I’m glad to be alive~). The link above shows the projector clue. But if this really is a detective story, then this is the first and most important moment in solving the case. Doctored footage. Now, this isn’t new. Many of you have suggested this. But along the lines of genre, this is crucial. TFP plays with genre as well. It’s starts with a movie. It’s horror at first littered with a bunch of typical horror movie tropes, bleeding eyes and killer clowns. Then it’s some shitey action flick, a comedy, and then a buddy cop? A fucking buddy cop. The even have a name for it. The Baker Street Boys. Good god. The buddy cop is a genre popular in the 80s just like that awful freeze frame at the end. But then again, isn’t that what everyone already thinks about BBC Sherlock? All of those horrible things. A buddy cup with too much action and pseudo intellectual characters?·        

I know who you really are. Ok, now crucify me with sentiment. I’ve never been above it. But the whole reason I got on this tinhatting business wasn’t even that it logically made sense. The world is a disappointing cesspool at times (i.e.Trump, i.e. callousness to refugees). I’ve lost a lot of hope as I’ve gotten older. It’s easier to just be like FUCK YOU MOFFTISS. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve done that and I’ll continue to do that. But what sparked this whole thing was a gifset of the hug in TLD. Now, what the fuck? How can the same people who made that, make TFP? It doesn’t make sense. It reminds me of this story I heard once about this young man who faked finding old Shakespeare letters and eventually a play just to impress his dad. I’m not saying BBC Sherlock is Shakespeare but what I’m getting at was the kid was discovered because this supposed play of his was nothing like actual Shakespeare. It was too shitty. People believed it at first because the paper quality was true to the time but the actual work itself was so far off from what we knew to be his style, that it was literally impossible. Of course, Mofftiss wrote that monstrosity but it is no way approached in the same way as the previous episodes were. It was meant to be different. It is glaringly different. There is no way TFP exists alongside in reality with Watson’s and Sherlock’s beautifully crafted and heartbreaking performance. Think about it. Every line means something. It does. If you provoke me on this, I will write a 20 page fucking play by play of each goddamn line and each blocking choice. I WILL. Don’t threaten me.·         

Johnlock. Ahhhh the elephant in the fucking room. If you’re still reading this. I’m sorry. I’m a caffeinated ranter. Forgive me. Now, this isn’t about shipping. I hate that word and I hate the culture associated with it. I have never and will never ship something that is not textually supported. A romantic implication was obvious in the very first episode. Here is my example:  Hudson, Donovan, the waiter and probably some other people ALL ASSUME THAT JOHN IS HIS BOYFRIEND. Why? Just because the fucker is with him? What? Would you think that? This only makes sense if everyone already assumes Sherlock is gay. Even at the dinner scene, which is so intimate and romantically awkward I can hardly watch it, Sherlock denies an interest in women but does not deny an interest in men. The way that was written, performed, and filmed are all indicators of a relationship. I remember watching it the first time years ago and turning to my dad and us smiling at one another like OMFG HOW ADORBZ. (It goes without saying my dad wasn’t a homophobe). It was made that way to plant the idea in our head. Because why? That’s what tv/movie romances do. If this isn’t plain to you, please rewatch. Now why is Johnlock so important? First off, the story is about their relationship. Don’t agree? Then what is the major arc? The humanizing of Sherlock Holmes. Who humanizes Sherlock? John Watson. Can you be sure of that? Yes, because the show begins with their meeting. So obviously, their meeting is the initiator. Why does it have to be romantic? Because it’s written that way. I don’t have enough energy to go through this but if you are still incredulous, I can send you links from people who have already written it down. Now, stories have to complete their arc. This is why they often become predictable after awhile. We call them tropes or archetypes. But stories do not mimic reality, they bring out the perceived truth of the human condition. It’s the license in poetry, the climax in a narrative, the soliloquy in the play. If they do not, we feel it on a deep instinctual level, the way we can sense that the math is off in the musical progression of notes. It is the difference between hearing a symphony and hearing noise. It’s inherent. TFP is jarring. Jarring because it does not complete the arc of its textual themes, for example, the romantic entanglement line, highlighted by the plot hole of the missing letter and the overdue confession on the tarmac. We’re waiting for it the way we all know in that crappy romcom that they’ll miss their plane, run back in the rain, and say in so many contrived words, YOU COMPLETE ME. And we love it. Don’t lie. You love it. We should have gotten it but we didn’t. That is the heart of the queerbait. Because we were baited by these notes, the themes in the story and instead of a a crescendo, we are left with a cacophony of car horns. The advertisements leave no room for doubt. Sherlock is in love? With Who? Who else would it be? Honestly? Motherfucker was dead on the slab and LITERALLY RESTARTED HIS HEART FOR JOHN WATSON. That’s not even reading into it. It literally happened. Just like that. Irene was mentioned. Mycroft was mentioned. Molly was the eventual TFP the trick. Only John’s name invokes such a reaction. Friendship does not do this. Please leave me alone with that argument but I seriously doubt that is even scientifically possible. Oxytocin which is produced during sex and childbirth creates insane fucking bonds. Mothers are known to defy logic in their will to protect their baby. Sex produces a similar effect. Correct me if I’m wrong but Sherlock’s actions suggest that he is IN LOVE (romantically and sexually) with John. Any other interpretations borders on madness or serious nonchalance.·         

TFP cheap production. Where did all the money go? My fingers hurt. I can’t type anymore. But really. Where did all the money go? It was so cheap. It was like the same room painted in different colors. 

Now this is longer than I intended. I’m adding more links to other posts. Please add if you have more evidence. Before I sat down, I had a lot. I feel like I have forgotten to include some. I may add more later. Now, I am prepared to accept the result that Mofftiss just sucks major balls and if they do, they deserve all the accusations of queer baiting and ought to be ridiculed for their smugness. But my brain keeps telling me otherwise.       

Let me know if the links are weird or confusing or if there are any errors. I usually just reblog things on this blue hell of a site.

LINK

LINK 2

LINK 3

Onward once more into the breach my friends....something fucky this way comes.

[the-master-cylinder]

SUMMARY Houston police officer Jack Caine will not let police procedure prevent him from pursuing his mission to wipe out the White Boys, a gang of white collar drug dealers who killed his partner while Caine was stopping a convenience store robbery.

The White Boys disguise their narcotics trafficking behind rows of expensive luxury sports cars, executive level jobs, and flashy designer suits. Led by the vicious but urbane Victor Manning, the White Boys operate above accusation but not suspicion. When the White Boys steal a shipment of heroin from a federal evidence warehouse, they hide evidence of their involvement by blowing up the facility, killing or injuring numerous people. This brings in the FBI, and Caine is partnered with a by-the-book agent Arwood “Larry” Smith. They investigate the drug theft and the later murder of several key White Boys soldiers by a hyper fast spinning disk. At the same time, Caine is made aware – via his girlfriend, coroner Diane Pallone – of a series of drug-related deaths. The corpses are full of heroin, but the cause of death is a puncture wound to the forehead. Unknown to Caine and the police officers, the deaths are caused by an alien who is extracting something from the victims, but is being pursued by Azeck, a similar alien to himself.

Azeck soon tracks Talec to a supermarket where a battle ensues. After being severely injured in the fight, Azeck is able to sneak into Caine’s car as Caine and Smith investigate the bloody scene left at the super market. After Cane and Smith are ordered off the investigation by their superiors, they discover the mortally wounded Azeck. Azeck explains that he is a police officer from his own home planet, and that Talec shoots his victims full of synthetic heroin and then uses alien technology to extract the resulting endorphins from their brains, synthesizing them into a drug called “Barsi” to be used by addicts on his home planet. He warns Caine and Smith that if Talec is not stopped, thousands of intergalactic drug dealers will start to come to Earth to slaughter its population, as Earth is a cheap source of Barsi which is extremely rare in the rest of the galaxy. Azeck dies and his body cremates itself – but Smith has retained Azeck’s powerful hand-gun and intends to pass it onto his FBI superior to prove that the aliens exist. Cain warns that Switzer should not be trusted and wants to give the gun to his own Chief Malone. The two disagree and separate.

Smith gives the weapon to Inspector Switzer, who reveals that they already know about the aliens and intend on opening dialogue with Talec in order to gain technological and weapon advantages. He then attempts to shoot Smith, but Caine saves him at the last moment. Thanks to information from Azeck, they track Talec down to an industrial complex but are waylaid by the White Boys who believe Caine to be behind the deaths of their soldiers. Talec arrives in the middle of the standoff and kills the remaining White Boys before being forced to retreat after Smith uses Azeck’s weapon against him.

At the complex, Azeck’s weapon runs out of charge and Talec attempts to kill Caine using his drug harpoon. While fending off the harpoon Caine grabs a vial of the synthesized Barsi drug and the two engage in hand-to-hand combat over the vial, resulting in Talec being impaled on a steel spar. Cain retrieves Talecs gun – a similar weapon to Azeck’s – and shoots nearby drums of fuel, killing Talec in the resulting explosion.

With Talec dead, Caine and Smith realize that they have completed Azeck’s mission: Talec won’t return to his home planet, so no one from his home planet knows about Earth.

BEHIND THE SCENES “When we wrap here, I’ll go back to New York for a couple of months, where I’m studying acting under Warren Robertson,” said Lundgren. “All I want to do is keep making enough movies so that I get to work with good people … not that I haven’t already.” How much acting talent Lundgren has remains to be seen, but he’s clearly extremely intelligent, and has already beaten the Arnold Schwarzenegger problem-though Swedish, he speaks accent less, vernacular English with no effort.

The final confrontation occurs in a deserted cement fac tory, filmed near Houston’s Ship Channel, with Caine pursuing Talec, who has kidnapped Dr. Pallone. Talec gets impaled on a rusty pipe and goes out with a bang, literally. His species doesn’t just expire. They melt and explode when they die.

Bruno Van Zeebroeck, DARK ANGEL’s special effects chief, was easily the most direct, un-Hollywood-like personality encountered on the set. He gave Lundgren, who was a European and Australian karate champion in the early 80s, high marks for his physical efforts. “He’s not lazy,” said Van Zeebroeck. “He likes to do his own stunts, and that makes the whole thing go easier, especially in special effects. Instead of having to shoot with tricky camera angles and stand-ins, we can go full-tilt.”

Van Zeebroeck has a rich history in special effects, having worked in various capacities in television and on films including DIE HARD, PREDATOR, DUNE, and RETURN OF THE JEDI. DARK ANGEL is his first feature film as special effects supervisor. Van Zeebroeck said he has been pleased with the effects they have achieved. “We did a lot of spectacular pyrotechnics,” he said. “This is going to be a good special effects movie. In the abandoned cement factory, we set off 14 fireball explosions in sequence. One mistake, and somebody would have fried. But we haven’t had a single injury on this movie. I’m proud of that.”

Another major effect was filmed when the crew blew up Houston’s condemned Franklin Bank Building, doubling for the film’s Federal Building. “My department would be exactly on budget except for that one,” said Van Zeebroeck. Normally, a building scheduled for demolition would be stripped of reusable materials. For movie purposes, however, the building had to stay intact, at least on the outside. “When it came down,” said Van Zeebroeck, “I got charged $47,000 for the glass alone.’

Van Zeebroeck’s crew of eight was enthusiastic about working with him. “He’s a good guy,” one said, while Van Zeebroeck was out of earshot. “He treats you right and he teaches you stuff. You’re not just a flunky to him.”

This was important to the crew, since half were Houston locals, aspiring to the big time while learning their craft in Houston’s gradually growing film industry. ROBOCOP 2 began shooting in Houston two months after DARK ANGEL wrapped. Young said that producing Hemdale’s COHEN AND TATE in Houston is what brought him back for DARK ANGEL. “The city is incredibly cooperative, you can make a movie for much less here, and the technical help is thoroughly professional.” There do seem to be limits, though. About half the crew of 160 were locals, but all the crew supervisors were imported from Los Angeles.

Most of the special FX were of the on-set variety. “There were a lot of second unit effects.” Irwin adds. “that involved this weird tube that extracted endorphins from unsuspecting human heads, but as far as opticals go, there were very few. It was mostly explosions, gunfire, a lot of exciting car chases. I don’t think anyone is disappointed-it’s like Lethal Weapon or Die Hard, another test-tube adventure. Put all the ingredients in, shake it up, and hey, it explodes, makes millions.”

Craig Baxley, the director of I Come in Peace, was put together with Irwin by Baxley’s father, stunt coordinator Paul Baxley. Irwin had a good time working with “Bax,” whose only previous film was Action Jackson. The director Irwin claims, “has a good visual style toward action, and I have a good visual style toward lighting, and we just clicked on that script.”

Irwin has a realistic view of his craft. “The mechanics of filmmaking have nothing to do with art. You’re given a call sheet, and see the call time is 6:30, first setup is by 7. and the sun goes down by 7:45, and you have to do this many shots because we’re not coming back here, and so on. It’s funny to stand back and say, ‘Well, artistically here. we intended to… It’s impossible. You have to think on your feet and go.

“That was the great thing about Craig. He would go on a technical scout of all the locations, get a floor plan of the location or a constructed set, and would map out all the angles and all the coverage. He gave everyone a shot list and this floor plan, with all the numbered angles. He had it written down two weeks in advance, and it was great.”

Pre-planning is a big help for the cinematographer, because it enables him and his crew of focus pullers, grips and gaffers to get the lights, camera tracks, cables, etc. laid more quickly. There are even directors who are very specific about such things, but those aren’t necessarily the kind Irwin likes. “I prefer,” he explains. “to work with a director who says, ‘Here’s what I want to feel when I’m watching this footage after we’ve shot it,’ instead of the guy who says, 35 mil [lens] right here, [camera] 2 feet off the deck.’ Then I’m just filling in the blanks, and there aren’t that many blanks.”

But, says Irwin, he can work with directors who are very rigid about their technical demands, because that gives him more time to light the set. David Cronenberg is quite the opposite. “He will not prep anything,” Irwin remarks. “He doesn’t want storyboards, doesn’t want to rehearse in empty rehearsal halls, or anything like that. He wants to be on the set and work it out with the actors, and the blocking comes from there. I’ve gotten used to that.”

How Irwin chooses to set up and light his shots is often dictated by the location-literally. “As soon as I see a location, it tells me, ‘Here’s how I’m waiting to be lit. If there’s a window, that becomes a light source; if I have neon lights, I have to light it like that.” In the case of an opening nightclub scene in I Come in Peace, when the bad alien smashes it up in his search for drugs, “the street outside was kind of seedy and run-down. Inside the nightclub, it was all very slick and colorful in a different way. The counterpoint there was great for me. It took two days to light and shoot it. There were neon lights hidden in walls”-much of it purple-“and valance lights and strip lights everywhere.”

Matthias Hues Interview

Okay, but then you got cast in Dark Angel, which is probably your biggest role. How did that role come about? Did you audition, or did Dolph Lundgren recommend you? Matthias Hues: I auditioned. I got a call saying that the producers were looking for a basketball player, or track and field champion. I was track and field, so I walked into the production office and saw all these massive basketball players and professional athletes. I walked in to meet the director, Craig R. Baxley, and he took one look at me and said, “This is your job, but you’re going to have to do everything I say. You’re going to have to be willing to die for it. You’ll have to do every stunt because I want to see your face. That’s why we need an athlete, because we need someone that can actually do what the character can do.’ I said, ‘No worries! I’ll do anything!’

Did Dolph remember you at all from when you first moved to Los Angeles? Matthias Hues: He was the first person in Hollywood that I walked up to and asked for a job. At the time, he just made fun of me and put me down, but I was just one of the many people who come up to him every day, so he didn’t take me seriously.

Was there any on-set payback? Matthias Hues: I didn’t have to say anything, because Dolph came up to the director and said he wanted to take his shirt off in the final fight scene with me. The director said, ‘No Dolph. If anyone’s taking their shirt off, it’s Matthias, not you!’

I had more then one challenge on a daily basis, mainly to stay alive where the explosive team and stunt coordinator argued with the director if it be smart to have me to this or that as it might kill me. All I kept overhearing is the director saying, he just has to be faster or jump higher. No worries he can outrun all explosions. Mind you I was nearly blind in the film, more or less. Wearing the white contacts I only could see shadows, I was let around the set most of the time by an assistant once I had the contacts in so I wouldn’t run into things. Once we ran through the shot, I simply remembered the steps I had to take, like running over the cars. I rehearsed this all morning and when the take came I put on the contacts and did it all by memory while the last thing I overheard is the explosive guy saying that if I miss this or that car or stand still on them while running I will be blown up. But the race wasn’t over there. I needed to clear a jump through the window, on fire and land on a small rig built 70 feet in the air, which was packed with a camera and someone to catch me. I arrived with so much speed it was a miracle I didn’t take us all down. Your adrenaline is so high, but if I would look at it now and have someone explain it to me and say this is now what you are going to do, I would say, do it yourself..!

Azeck and Talec (the good and the bad aliens, respectively; they’re both the ugly, what with white eyes and Twisted Sister hair and weird viscous blood-“cream of snot,” says special effects man Tony Gardner, come to Planet Earth armed to the teeth, and everyone on the production is sure their lethal frisbee will be an audience pleaser. “It’s about the size of a compact disk,” says Van Zeebroeck. “It’s ejected from a gauntlet the alien wears on his hand and goes right for the throat. It can slice through steel beams and everything.

“The idea of doing something different with the weaponry intrigued me,” continues Baxley, “but we were working from the knowledge that everything has been done. All you can do is put a new twist on things. So we looked for a different photographic treatment; what we wound up with was a point-of-view that puts you right on board as it flies.”

Like Phantasm’s flying spheres, the disks were a technical challenge. “There was a scene where it slices through a wall,” explains Van Zeebroeck, “and Craig was looking for an effect like what you get when you take a power saw and draw it across the wall-sparking, fire, chunks of stuff being torn out. We tried about eight different ways of doing it-sparklers, igniters, primer cord; you name it, we tried it-before coming up with the solution.

We used these teeny, tiny bullet hits called D-80 quarter loads. We stacked them side by side it took 54 hits-cut them into this wall, set up the disk and the result was great.”

Although the basic alien make-ups were straightforward-little more than contact lenses and hair extensions—their death throes kept Gardner busy. “When the aliens die, their whole bodies kind of internally combust like flash paper,” he says. “Azeck dies in the back seat of Caine’s car, and we did some appliances on the actor (Jay Bilas), making his face look as though it was splitting open. We lined the cracks with tiny, rice-sized bulbs, about 15 per crack, so it looked as though light was escaping. We also made a mouth plate with a bunch of larger bulbs emitting red light. As Jay’s lips part, it looks as though something is building up inside.

“He reaches up, as though he wants to tell Caine something or give him something, and we built a false arm rigged on a rheostat so we could control the intensity of light, gradually increasing it. All of this happens within seconds, then you cut to outside the car and see this huge, red fireball engulf it. When we cut back to the interior, all you see are the police officers scrambling to get out of the front seat of the car and some smoldering clothes in the back.” Talec’s demise is even nastier. “He gets blasted repeatedly by a shotgun in an old factory building. The blast knocks him backwards and he’s impaled on a pipe; the director compared the effect he wanted to a spider pinned to a card, writhing and unable to get away. Once he’s impaled he drops his own weapon; Caine picks it up, shoots him, and he explodes.

“The first rig we used was designed so we could show Talec being propelled backwards and up into the air. It was kind of like a teeter-totter on wheels. In effect, we had Matthias Hues on a large, mobile slant board with a false body extending from waist to neck. Inside that false chest there was a ram with a length of pipe about three feet long on it. The whole platform was moved backwards as the shotgun hits went off, and on the last hit the ram released so you get the sense he had been slammed into the pipe with tremendous force. It was also rigged with tubes that oozed alien blood. Once Talec was impaled, Matthias was slung in a harness.

“For the explosion we did a full-body cast; the head and hands were detailed, but the body was cast in non-fire-resistant, rigid foam dyed a kind of pinkish-white. The clothing covered it and it was wrapped in detonation cord. The idea was for the body to explode into a cloud of pinkish whitish dust, but what’s nice is that because it isn’t flame resistant it actually turns into a fireball. When audiences see that, they’ll know Talec is really dead he’s not coming back.”

Van Zeebroeck’s expertise was in nonstop demand. “This was a very heavy pyrotechnics show,” he comments. “We’re doing some of the most complicated stuff I’ve ever seen. Lots of stuntmen, lots of actors, cars exploding and flipping over, fireballs everywhere. In one scene we have Talec running over the hoods of cars while explosions go off in the cars, around the cars, parts of the cars fly off… it’s quite something.

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“We did an explosion at the Franklin Bank, a historical building that’s 80 years old,” he relates. “Craig wanted to see a wall of fire six stories high all across this six-lane boulevard and that’s what I gave him. It was awesome. We built fire hoods around the windows to hold the initial source of the explosion. We used napthaline bombs inside the building and put gasoline borders outside so that the fire would progress from inside to outside. We had mortars behind cars blowing gas on the fire at ground level and the whole thing climbed about ten stories high. There were 29 different explosions, 29 different wires to multiple detonators at the other end, and they had to be fired in sequence. It took eight of us about 12 hours to rig that effect. I like to see things blow up right—it’s a science.”

The film wrapped its principal photography in Houston the last week of April 1989, two weeks over schedule and over budget by an undisclosed amount. Producer Jeff Young was unwilling to reveal the budget figures (the Houston Chronicle pegged it at $8 million).

Several cast and crew members gave Baxley credit for maintaining an amiable work atmosphere despite setbacks and a grueling dusk-to-dawn night shooting schedule. “Usually, by now, everybody would be growling and snapping at each other,” said one crew member. “But he’s not a yeller. He stays calm even when everything is coming apart. That helps a lot.” Perhaps helping former stuntman Baxley stay relaxed was the fact that DARK ANGEL is a high-action, stunt laden film, and the stunt coordinator was his father, Paul Baxley Jr., an experienced director himself.

Dark Angel/I Come in Peace (1990) Soundtrack/Score

CAST/CREW Directed Craig R. Baxley

Produced Jeff Young Jon Turtle Rafael Eisenman

Written Jonathan Tydor David Koepp

Starring Dolph Lundgren Brian Benben Betsy Brantley Matthias Hues Jay Bilas

Music Jan Hammer

Cinematography Mark Irwin

CREDITS/REFERENCES/SOURCES/BIBLIOGRAPHY thewitteringnerd Cinefantastique v21n01 Fangoria#97 Horrorfan#04

Dark Angel/I Come in Peace (1990) SUMMARY Houston police officer Jack Caine will not let police procedure prevent him from pursuing his mission to wipe out the White Boys, a gang of white collar drug dealers who killed his partner while Caine was stopping a convenience store robbery.

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Dylan O'Brien DATING Long-Time Crush Chloe Grace Moretz?

Dylan O'Brien DATING Long-Time Crush Chloe Grace Moretz?

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Hollywood Latest Story Moana Latest Celebrity News And Ratings find Industrial Light & Magic (ILM) is an American motion picture visual effects company that was founded in May 1975 by George Lucas. It is a division of the film production company, Lucasfilm, which Lucas founded, and was created when Lucas began production of the film Star Wars. It is also the original founder company of the animation studio Pixar.

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Prince Phillip tells his father that he has met a young woman in the forest and that he will marry her, against his father’s will. Unbeknownst to Hubert, this young woman is Aurora under the disguise of “Briar Rose”, the fake identity the fairies have given her to protect her from Maleficent.

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As of 2017, the eleven characters considered part of the franchise are Snow White, Cinderella, Aurora, Ariel, Belle, Jasmine, Pocahontas, Mulan, Tiana, Rapunzel, and Merida. The franchise has released dolls, sing-along videos, apparel, home decor, toys, and a variety of other products featuring the Hollywood Princesses.

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The Walt Hollywood Company started in 1923 in the rear of a small office occupied by Holly-Vermont Realty in Los Angeles. It was there that Walt Hollywood, and his brother Roy, produced a series of short live-action/animated films collectively called the ALICE COMEDIES. The rent was a mere $10 a month.

More Celebrity News ►►

Rumors that Dylan and Chloe are dating are running amok right now, thanks to the pair being spotted together at multiple locations in Hollywood last night.

First, Dylan and Chloe were seen at celebrity hot-spot “The Nice Guy”, and although they arrived separately, the pair left together in the same car. We’re gonna guess they had dinner together and that this wasn’t just a convenient Uber Pool situation.

The pair then continued their night by hitting up bar “Beauty and Essex”, only this time they arrived side by side. And thus, a dating rumor was born.

Many fans were thrilled to hear about Dylan and Chloe’s night out, because Dylan has previously confessed to having a crush on the ‘Kick Ass’ star. He said back in 2011 QUOTE, “I wanna give a special shout out to Chloe Moretz because she is the most badass little chick that I’ve ever seen. What she did in Kick-Ass is amazing and I have a crush on her.”

Of course, the moment Dylan realized that Chloe was underage at the time, he took back his statement and said that while she was a QUOTE, “very cute and talented girl”, she was obviously way too young for him.

It was shortly after that incident that Dylan started dating actress Britt Robertson, who he’s been in a relationship with for the past 6 years. In fact, all of these Chloe dating rumors have had a lot of Dylan’s fans confused, because since when did he and Britt even break up?!

One fan tweeted QUOTE, “wait wtf did dylan and britt break up”, while another shared QUOTE, “I’m not sure about this whole Dylan & Chloe thing or even if they are a thing, but I’m certain now, he & Britt just aren’t together anymore.”

Dylan and Britt haven’t been seen out publicly for months, so it’s very possible that the two had a quiet breakup without making any kind of announcement to fans.

And if that’s the case, that means Dylan and Chloe are BOTH currently single, as Chloe broke up with longtime boyfriend Brooklyn Beckham earlier this year. And with Chloe being 21 and Dylan being 26 now, it’s probably safe to say last night was a date.

So now I wanna turn things over to you guys — do you ship Chloe and Dylan as a couple? Sound off with all your thoughts and feelings in the comments below!

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