#morally gray bad boy
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loveipromiseimnotinsane · 1 year ago
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Just to throw this out there
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purplepotatobread · 8 months ago
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Me when people hate on cool female characters for no reason
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the-way-astray · 8 months ago
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what if i told you
i wish keefe had actually branded sophie
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chicoryblue · 2 years ago
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Smoke-sweet scented words drift across the quiet, a light breath of a laugh against your ears, as you tuck yourself even closer. Behind breezy drapes of the Silk Halls, pressed into your side - touch faint at your waist, never demanding, you wish he were - he recounts secrets lined with silver and bone.
My boy Camino, with an expression rarely found on his face, but one that is far more genuine.
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danidoesathing · 2 years ago
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on one hand being in a small fandom kinda sucks because there's not a whole lot of fan content being made but on the other I could not IMAGINE the awful takes that would be posted if it was popular
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So I'm putting together an In Defence of Cassie PowerPoint for a PowerPoint night with friends. Do you have any arguments for or against her? I trust your opinion and am curious.
Let's see.
"She's too powerful, too unique, too far-seeing, and not good enough for Jake! What a Mary Sue!"
Counterpoint: May I introduce you to the reigning champion fan favorite, Sad White Boy Tobias?
Only nothlit ever to regain the ability to morph
Only known human-andalite hybrid ever to exist
Regarded as savior by entire hork-bajir species
Entire existence is a time paradox the war hinges upon
Pulls the canonically "most beautiful girl in our grade", who turns down 6 or 7 other offers in favor of Bird Boy
Correctly predicted planetary ecology 65 million years in advance
Believed to be immune to 2-hour limit
In conclusion: y'all wouldn't be crying "Mary Sue" if Cassie was a sad white boy, and I can prove it.
"She's too weak and hand-wringing, and she never helps the war effort!"
Counterpoint: First of all, the fact that the same people say this in the same breath as "she's too powerful" is... telling. Secondly:
She saved the entire team's lives in #24, in #29, in #44, and in MM1, among others.
Specifically calling out #44 — that ending shows she is willing and able to be ruthless when her friends are in need. She doesn't like slaughtering human-controllers, but if the alternative is everyone she loves dying, then she'll fucking well do it.
Much like Jake (see: Sad White Boy), she's more willing to risk herself than her friends, hence the end of MM1
Her medical knowledge saves Marco from rabies, Ax from brain!appendicitis, and Tobias from bird flu.
Her survivalist knowledge saves everyone in #25 (the Arctic), MM2 (Cretaceous Era), #11 (rainforest), and #14 (desert).
In conclusion: Cassie's only idealistic-looking by the standards of this extremely morally gray team.
"She's so unfair to Jake!"
Counterpoint: Jake? The Jake who refused to speak with her for weeks? Jake who proposes marriage while they're still broken up? Jake who announces he'll never trust Cassie again because she [checks notes] saved his brother's life? That Jake?
Also:
She gives him tons of emotional support in #16, #21, #47, and other times he's feeling low.
They have a healthy argument where they air differences and come to an understanding in #9.
Did I mention he doesn't just dump her but ghosts her in the middle of the war's endgame?
They're teenagers. Their relationship isn't perfect, but it is built on open communication and mutual respect which is more than Rachel and Tobias can say
She's fighting a war, and PTSD for that matter. No, she doesn't have infinite emotional bandwidth.
In conclusion: Their relationship is fine, their breakup is mutual, and her behavior only looks bad if, once again, you're holding Cassie to a different standard than you are Jake.
"She shouldn't have trusted Aftran!"
Counterpoint: friendly reminder that the alternative was killing a 6-year-old for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. If that's what you think Cassie should've done, that tells us more about you than about her.
"She spends too much time moralizing!"
Counterpoint: this is a book series about war, not a friggin' video game. If you want moral pornography, go play Call of Duty. If you want sci fi realism, then you're going to have to accept that a majority of humans prefer not to kill their fellow humans if at all possible.
"She's a ripoff of [insert character here]!"
Counterpoint: literally every single one of these says more about the commenter than about the source work. "Every dystopia is set in the U.S." is the kind of thing only people who only read books by American authors would think. "All epic fantasy is Eurocentric" => tell me you only read books by white people without telling me. I'm glad you think Cassie is too similar to Willow Rosenberg, but there are at least 6 other stories in the known world, and I hear some of them even feature sweet/dorky/caring characters who are secretly ultra-powerful.
In conclusion: You don't have to like Cassie as a (fictional) person, but 85% of criticisms directed at her are bad-faith attacks on one of the 1990s' only fat Black female gnc ultra-powerful superheroes.
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hooffuloftootsierolls · 5 months ago
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I love you Stella
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God, she’s cunt, bitch, and brat all rolled into one. I’m obsessed with her. Stella Goetia they could never make me hate you.
#hb reblog#helluva boss#stella#they can never make me hate you stella#still pissed they made her evil#because “poor soft boi stolas” ughhh#the least they could do is make it so she wasn't a bad child#that way it would seem like she disliked stolas because they were forced to be in an arranged marriage and had no feelings for each other#and she would still be morally gray because of her rudeness to stolas and her want to punish him for cheating and also#*checks nonexistent notes* i forgot stella's motive.#ok i needed to rewatch a scene of western energy she mostly just wants him dead because she. doesn't like him lmao#but andy points out that she won't get any of stol's stuff since they have an heir#ok ok ok the spoiled royal brat backstory and all that could have been taken out it was just a way to be like#“ooooh she's been bad since childhood!” because apparently it's so hard to make a character complex and not evil from the start#also?? children are bratty in general and ofc a princess that's spoiled since birth is gonna be mean lol#but ughhh im explaining this so poorly but i hate how she's this plain character who's just there as a stolitz obstacle#because haha evil she wants to kill stolas and was ALWAYS evil that way she's the bad guy and stolas never did anything wrong#how about they're both gray? huh? how about stolas was wrong for cheating and stella went too far trying to assassinate him?#she can be an obstacle without being plain evil?!?!?! how hard is it to write a complex villain???!?!?!?!?!#i think the scene of her gossiping about stolas w her friends and her saying she likes tormenting stolas were unnecessary#they were added to make her the villain without delving into why she feels this way.#because apparently she was like this before the cheating? what because she grew up spoiled and was in an arranged marriage?#i just feel like they could have done better. she's morally gray in my mind#they just wanted to give the fandom someone to hate so they didn't realize how bad stolas actually is
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moonagedaydreamsofrhiannon · 8 months ago
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IN DEFENSE OF TRAVIS MARTINEZ:
Because I’m sick and tired of seeing travis hate everywhere I go.
“Travis was sexist.”
Did he spout some sexist rhetoric in the beginning of the show? Sure. But it’s important to recognize that: A) he changed, and by season 2 he completely stopped, B) he was a teenage boy in the 1990s, and that kind of rhetoric was normal at the time, C) most of his sexist macho tough guy attitude was a complete act that he likely put on to compensate for his insecurity about his own masculinity, and internalized homophobia. (More on that later.)
(Also let’s be real, Travis is basically one of the girls anyway and I’m tired of pretending he’s not.)
2. “Travis didn’t care about Javi.”
Did we watch the same show??? Granted Travis may have had trouble expressing his feelings (also related to his insecurities about masculinity, likely learned from his father, as well as growing up in a patriarchal and homophobic society), but he cared deeply about Javi. In S1E4, Travis literally DUG UP HIS DAD’S GRAVE, through horror, tears, and vomit, in order to retrieve his ring to give to Javi. When Javi disappeared, Travis kept looking for him every day for months, and never gave up, even when logically it would have seemed impossible for him to still be alive. He comforted and reassured Javi when neither of them drew the card. He cradled Javi’s dead body and ate a bite of his raw heart (which was a metaphor for how much he loved him, and a parallel to Shauna eating Jackie’s raw ear.) Maybe Travis wasn’t always there for Javi in the way he needed, but he absolutely loved him, and it’s important to remember that Travis was also a traumatized, grieving, kid who just lost his dad.
3. “Travis slut-shamed Nat.”
As we are literally shown in the show, Travis was not trying to slut shame her, he asked how many times she had done it because he was embarrassed about the fact that he was a virgin, and worried that she would judge him, or that he wouldn’t measure up because he was more inexperienced than her. When she told him she hooked up with Bobby Farleigh, he did not get mad at her because she slept with another guy (he already knew about that, and was fine with it), he got mad because she hooked up with his bully, and then lied to him about it. I don’t blame Nat for this, she didn’t know about it at the time, and didn’t want him to get mad once she found out, but I also don’t blame Travis for being hurt and embarrassed and upset with her for lying about it.
4. “Travis was just kind of a dick.”
Sure, but so were all of them. He acted like kind of a jerk in the first season. So what? Shauna had an affair with her best friend’s boyfriend, lied to her about it for months, and refused to apologize. Misty tried to drug Coach Ben. Nat faked his brother’s death to him (yeah, she was trying to help him move on, but still not cool). All of them called him “Flex” (y’know, the nickname that was used to bully him for years). None of them are perfect or nice or likable all the time, and that’s ok; that’s the whole point. They’re realistic, complex, flawed, morally gray and sometimes unlikable people. They’ve all done bad things, but nothing Travis did is worse than what anyone else on that show has done. He was a traumatized teen whose dad literally just died. Also, me personally, if everyone around me was constantly calling me the mean nickname that was used to bully me since middle school, I would also probably act like a little bit of a dick.
5. “Travis is a straight man.”
Wrong. (Also not really a valid reason to hate someone… But most importantly, just wrong.)
Travis Martinez is clearly a bisexual.
So many of his issues: the insecurity, the bullying, the macho tough guy act, the whole weird complex about his masculinity, all of it stems (at least partly) from the fact that he’s bisexual and has internalized homophobia. The whole “Flex” thing is just thinly veiled homophobia. The main reason why he got bullied is because Bobby Farleigh spread a rumor about him getting back surgery to better suck his own dick. The unsaid implication there is that he’s a man who sucks dick, which is inherently queer, even if it is his own. If you look even slightly past the most surface level interpretation, it’s pretty obvious that Travis was bullied because of homophobia. His performance of stereotypical toxic masculinity was clearly over compensation for the fact that he doesn’t fit into the box of traditional straight masculinity, and was a reaction to the bullying from his peers, abuse from his dad, and internalized homophobia from growing up in a homophobic and patriarchal society. As the show progresses he starts to unlearn that toxic masculinity and internalized homophobia, and he allows himself to be more vulnerable, emotional, and feminine, and as a result, he becomes stronger, more confident, and more respectful of the people around him.
As for Travis being a man… Is he though???
In season 1, Travis is a man (narratively speaking); there is a clear distinction between Travis/Coach Ben and the girls. However, in season 2, we see a stark shift in how Travis is depicted. The separation between Travis and the girls pretty much ceases to exist. Narratively speaking, there is no distinction made between Travis and the other girls; they are one entity—one hive mind. Instead, the emphasis is now placed on the distinction between Coach Ben and the girls/Travis. When Coach Ben watches the Yellowjackets eat Jackie in horror and disbelief, Travis is right there with them, dressed in ancient greek robes along with the rest of them. In season 2, Coach Ben is the only real Man of the group (Travis has narratively become one of the girls, and Javi is just a boy, not a man) and he is shown staying separate from the rest of the group, and growing more and more uncomfortable with the cultish dynamics, while Travis, on the other hand, becomes more and more integrated with the group, as he falls deeper and deeper into cult beliefs, until he is a full-blown devout Lottie worshipper. Of the three males on the show, he is the only one who actually participates in cannibalism with the other Yellowjackets. Also he lost his virginity to a lesbian.
Whether or not you choose to believe that Travis is transfem (I do) you cannot deny that, at least narratively speaking, Travis is literally just a girl.
6. Travis is a victim.
I don’t know why nobody in this fandom seems to acknowledge this, but Travis is a sexual assault victim and I’m tired of people constantly overlooking and ignoring that fact. In Doomcoming, the girls (excluding Jackie, Nat, Tai, and Van) chased him down, sexually assaulted him, and then tried to kill him. That’s not something that’s up for debate or denial, that is literally canon. Stop pretending it didn’t happen. Stop pretending it wasn’t assault. Stop shaming him and making fun of him for struggling with sex, or not always being able to get it up. That’s a normal trauma response after being assaulted/raped. You guys are literally proving the point. This kind of treatment from society towards masculinity and male victims is just playing into the patriarchy and toxic masculinity, and is exactly what made him act the way he did in season 1 in the first place!
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l0s3rd0wnt0wn · 17 days ago
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For weird reader, what if they auditioned for a musical and got a big part, but it’s in a less popular musical?
I’m thinking like weird reader getting Shrek in Shrek the musical or Annabeth in the lightning theif, because I like the idea of reader singing a song they really relate to
Oooh, what is reader played Micheal in be more chill?
*BLOWS DUST OF THE ASK* I MUST LOCK IN!!
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WB reader word should be in the musical. I feel like Heather's would suit her so well because the reader is sort of like Veronica from Heather's—a weird girl who's pretty smart, and getting on the popular kids' good side. She's a good person but makes bad decisions; a morally gray character who, at the end of the day, does some good. Plus, I think the reader would rock that blue uniform!
But it also has me thinking: just imagine the reader singing "Dead Girl Walking" with her actor partner and the crowd, which is filled with the Waynes and the reader's love interest, who's obviously yandere. It would bring so much drama! I mean, yes, the boys do love your voice and think you're an incredible actor, but there’s no way your acting partner should be touching up on you like that. Did you just take off your clothes in front of the crowd? They're literally having spasms! Bruce is all like, "You're too young, and how do you even know about this type of stuff? You aren't 19!" Dick is seriously impressed with your vocals, but you're his baby Robin, remember? If your partner gets too handsy, they'll get a visit from Nightwing.
Jason is enjoying the show and the spectacle, but he's definitely not a fan of your partner. They'll have a little chat, and by chat, I mean bullet to the skull. Tim is honestly in love with the entire performance; he's trying his best not to clap every time you say a line, but when "Dead Girl Walking" comes on, he instantly closes his eyes and covers his ears. Damian does enjoy the show, yet he’s still not a fan of his older sister parading herself like this. Where is your shame? And where's your actor partner's shame, looking at you like that? This must be discussed after the show.
Steph and Cass are literally in love with the choreography skills—like, hands down, they're foaming at the mouth! Barbara is filming everything, even though there weren't cameras allowed in the theater. She has her ways, but the film doesn't show the rest of the cast, only you the entire time. The camera was just focusing on you—way to be obsessed!
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grimmsbride · 1 month ago
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﹡.  ֗ ۪ do you know what that’s like? hearing about your home yet never being able to reach it? yeah, i do.
JAPANESE DENIM 𝜗𝜚ྀི GRIMMSBRIDE
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﹙ 🧜‍♀️ ﹚ BOY MEETS GIRL or rather, half-viltrumite that has never stepped foot onto his home planet meets siren who has never touched a body of water… crazy how common that is, huh?
﹡ | tags ◞  ₊  siren! reader | mark is a little ooc | love at first sight (on mark’s end) | canon differences | slight angst | mentions of the gda pushing moral boundaries | pure fluff | reader is a little soft-spoken | two lovers bonding over shared trauma <3 | friends / hidden crushes to ?? | etc.
﹡ | author’s notes ◞  ₊  this is just a little fluffy fic, i love sirens and i love mark even more. cecil is lowkey painted as bad (i know he’s morally gray) so i apologize for that. please excuse any and all grammar mistakes. i may write another fic with these two. | 1,974 words
When Mark Grayson first laid his eyes upon you, he wondered how one could be so perfect. As if someone, maybe God, took his time with you; each craft as meticulous as ever— leaving you, a woman with zero flaws. It was easy to tell how starstruck he was, gaze wandering from the top of your head watching the way your hair flowed down your body and enveloped your face in this pretty dark halo. Or how pinkish-bluish scales rest on your upper cheeks, shining under the light of the building you, him, and Cecil currently stood in. Lastly was your lips, parted in slight interest, taking in Mark just as heavily as he took in you.
“This is [Name].” Cecil broke the silence easily, allowing his gaze to shift to the young woman beside him for a moment before drifting back to Mark. “She’s not new to the GDA but she is new to the team. And given the two of you have that in common, it’d be nice for you to get acquainted.”
It was plain to see Invincible didn’t have much interest in what the man was saying, tuning in only for your name before tuning the rest out. With a step he brought himself closer, a few feet away as dark pools took in your form. A hand rose, faltering the moment he noticed the way your eyes snapped to it quickly. He could practically sense how tense you were, a nervous glint highlighting those pretty irises. Mark issued his best smile, a little quirk to show he truly meant no harm.
“I’m Invincible.. er— Mark, Mark Grayson. It’s nice to meet you.”
You stared at him for a long time before lifting your hand, sliding it into his own. You nodded at him slowly.
“It’s nice to meet you too.. Mark.”
From that point on only deepened the infatuation that Mark held for you. He pushed, learning more and more about you; dedicating each detail to memory, planting it on a canvas to showcase at a later date. Mark learned what you were; a siren, something the man has only ever heard of in movies. He wondered how you sounded, if the lilt of your voice was as pretty as you were. It had to be, given how much Cecil restricted you when it came to it. You had made the off comment once, stating that you simply weren’t allowed to use your voice unless the situation was especially dire.
For some reason, that fact irked him. But it didn’t compare to the absolute rage he felt when learning how you came to be. How you, a little siren was stolen from your home gifted to the GDA and trained to be some special little trump card.
“I have never even seen the ocean.” The words left you plainly, a saddened tilt lifting the speech. Scaled cheeks pressed into your knees, eyelashes fluttering low and covering those pretty eyes. “I’ve seen it in pictures, movies— but I’ve never felt it. Never smelt it. Nothing.”
Mark didn’t like the way the anger bubbled deep within him, how his hand clenched into the tightest fist as if wishing to find Cecil right then and now to give him a piece of his mind. See, Invincible was all too familiar with that feeling. Recollections of his father’s own tales of Viltrum entered his mind, some perfect place; a perfect connection to the man he aspires to be. He knew what is was like, having something so close in reach yet not even being able to so much as graze it.
So the moment a soft; “Do you know what it’s like? Hearing about your home yet never being able to reach it?”
Mark couldn’t help but immediately say, “Yeah.. I do.”
Your gazes locked, focusing on the other entirely. You looked at the man as if seeing him for the first time, truly seeing him. These past few months of growing to learn one another meant nothing to the moment now. You two quickly realized it, that hidden connection slowly rising to the surface.
With that you couldn’t help but smile — instantly melting any anger Mark felt in the process — lips moving slowly to release an affectionate; “I nearly forgot.. half alien boy.”
With this growing friendship you noticed things. How Mark could geek out about some comic dog and how he held back in fights. You also noticed how weird he’s been for the past few days. Never truly looking you in the eye, dodging hang outs— the whole nine yards. You didn’t understand most friendships, most connections, all of it was some foreign concept you were still getting used to. So you wondered if something changed in him, if the friendship was simply a grace period now ended.
Done and done, only leaving room to be teammates and nothing more.
But that thinking ended the moment you found him hovering outside of your bedroom window, all smiles and declaring he had to take you somewhere.
So here you were, wrapped up in his arms, your own settled around his neck. Your eyes shifted below the two of you, noting how far the ground was, wind blowing against your bodies as Mark flew through the air. With a lift of your head your gaze settled upon his face, noticing the serious expression splayed across his features.
“Where are we going?” You questioned softly, but loud enough the man could hear— clear in the way his head dropped a bit to glance at you. You couldn’t help the warmth enveloping your body the moment a little smile took over his previous expression, or how his fingers tightened just a bit on you.
“You’ll see.”
Your lips pursed together, deciding against pushing. You would see eventually, there was no harm in waiting. So with a little hum you pushed your face right into his chest, eyes closing and relaxing in his hold. With the wispy winds tickling your ears and the rhythmic heartbeat that belonged to Mark, you nearly could have fell asleep.
Nearly, as several minutes of you battling consciousness was soon interrupted by Mark gently shaking you. You hadn’t even realized the two of you had stopped flying, the man now grounded yet keeping you in his hold. You blinked away the blur tainting your eyes, sliding your arms from around his neck.
“We’re here.” Mark murmured, slowly helping you to your feet, an arm resting around your form to assure you were steady. With a nervous aura the man watched the way your eyes focused on the ground for a split second, how your eyebrows pushed together; clear confusion capturing your features. His eyes followed as your own rose, settling on his face, the question of your expression only deepening the moment you noticed the anxious smile he gave you.
“Mark..”
“Turn around.”
You blinked slowly, taking a step before turning your body. Your eyes widened at the view before you, the ocean as clear as day, not hidden behind some screen or some page in a book. The waves crashed into the shore, darkening the sand as an expanse of blue stretched farther than your eyes could. You stepped closer, the flow of salty sea water wafting in the air, filling your nostrils; you sucking it up before releasing it all in one shuddering breath. You stepped again, taking the fabric of the long skirt you wore, feeling the sting of your eyes; wondering if it was simply tears or the air itself.
Either way, you couldn’t help the little sound that escaped you — a mix of pure astonishment and disbelief — as you rushed forward. Mark watched as the water rose to your waist, a swell of happiness enveloping his chest. When he learned about you never seeing the ocean, it stuck with him. And while he couldn’t go to Viltrum for now, the least he could do was this.
If Cecil found out he would surely be a little mad, maybe even pissed— but that wasn’t his current concern. Seeing that smile stretch across your face was far more important.
Mark stepped closer, focusing on how you simply stood there in the water for a moment, surely taking it all in. However, his eyes widened the moment you suddenly dove under, leaving nothing but a ripple behind. His footsteps picked up speed, rushing towards the shore as his gaze danced about the water, searching for any sign of you.
Okay, now he was getting worried. Was this why you weren’t allowed near an ocean? Were you some type of special flight risk case? Had Mark been duped, blinded by puppy love?
“[Name]?….. [Name]! Where’d you go?!” The man called for you, panic clear in his speech— or more like his entire body. He pushed forward, caring less for his clothes getting soaked as he reached just a few feet ahead of the shore. Mark continued to search, eyes squinting and heart racing.
You had to be close, there was no way you got far already. Would he have to go under? How far did you go? This was definitely not the right clothes!—
The racing thoughts circling his mind came to an abrupt stop the moment something broke the surface before him, splashing his entire face in the process. With a groan Mark quickly wiped himself, and with a blurred gaze spotted you, hearing you shortly after.
A melody of giggles escaped you, body shaking with each rouse. But that wasn’t the only thing he noticed, Mark quickly spotting the way your scales had spread along the crown of your hair, arms and hands, — how your ears had shifted into sharp bluish-pink fins, creating a pretty ombr�� mesh to your usual skin tone. The man noticed the tail behind you.. your tail, just as pretty as you, shining against the bright sun overhead.
“You..”
Your laughter slowly died down, gaze soon focusing on how Mark looked at you. You smiled shyly, eyes dropping to the water. “Whenever my body makes contact with water I tend to shift. It’s pretty annoying when I try to shower.“
“You’re beautiful.”
You were stunned at his words, rather both of you were. A hue of red spread across his cheeks, flowing all up to his ears. He looked adorable like that, like some embarrassed puppy caught; like he himself hadn’t said what he just said. You could only smile, a flush warmth spreading throughout your entire body, a contrast to the sweet cold of the water.
You pushed closer, a hand rising to his chest, steadying yourself as you rose. You giggled softly the moment he stiffened under your touch, continuing your trek as you soon reached his cheek. With a lean you pressed your lips against the damp skin, resting there for an entire minute before pulling away.
“Thank you, Mark.” You spoke earnestly, smoothing the fabric of his shirt with wet fingers. “You didn’t have to do this..”
Mark smiled, hand rising to your wrist. You took this negatively, moving to lift your hand away but Mark wasn’t having that. With a simply slide his fingers were lacing with your own, squeezing your palms together as he stared down at you so gently.
“I wanted to. At least one of us should get a taste of home.”
The two of you chuckled at his words, simply staring at the other for a few moments before slowly drifting away; hands sliding from its grasp.
“I’ll be back in an hour. I promise.”
“And I’ll be waiting.. don’t worry, Cecil won’t find us.”
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theirondragonrants · 2 months ago
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The fact that shauna gets so much hate and now Melissa does too is proof that all of you who clampur for morally gray (and frankly darker than light gray) characters don't ACTUALLY want them. You want fake bad boys with hearts of gold and women in leather who look hot and badass but actually aren't bad people at all and have always done everything they do for some good purpose.
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moonlinos · 1 year ago
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A dwindling, mercurial high
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♡ Pairing: Bang Chan × fem!reader
♡ Genre: Childhood best friends, angst
♡ CW: Explicit sexual content (minors dni!), cheating, both Chan and Reader are morally gray characters, mentions of smoking, drinking, fingering, hand job, unprotected sex
♡ Word count: 10.1k
♡ Synopsis: Despite his love for you since childhood, Chan silently watched from the sidelines as you fell in love with your mutual friend. Your happiness has always been his priority, even at the expense of his own. But he can only endure the pain with a smile on his face for so long. With your growing realization that your fiancé is no longer the man you once loved, his longing to finally escape his torment and confess his feelings becomes unbearable.
♡ A/N: Based off a request by anon! Thank you for requesting 🩷 Cheating is bad, kids, this is fiction. Sorry to my boy Changbin, I used a random wheel to decide who would be the other member 🥲 I’ll focus on lighter stories now ‘cause I feel like this one turned out heavier than I anticipated lol
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Chan has known you since he was ten years old.
He’s sure he has been in love with you for just as long.
He wouldn’t be able to give an exact date; loving you has simply always been a part of his life. Your smile that’s engraved in his mind, your laughter he’s memorized, your mind which still fascinates him after so many years — it all wraps around his heart like a vice, making him a willing captive to this one-sided love.
For Chan, love is selflessness; sacrificing anything for the happiness of the one he loves. He doesn’t know anything but loving you, and his unwavering dedication to your happiness has led him to sacrifice his own for years.
Unbeknownst to you, Chan has been withering away slowly as you’ve grown happier.
But your happiness and his unrequited love never truly hurt him until the age of twenty.
It was Minho’s birthday, and he played the best friend card to convince Chan to buy fake IDs from a sketchy guy at their university. Your friend group drove to a deserted parking lot after buying far too much alcohol — Chan remembers the recurring thought inside his fuzzy mind was how much that situation would validate your parents’ scorching hatred for him if they were to find out.
You had your head on his shoulder, sitting on the bed of Minho’s truck, watching as the rest of your friends suffered the consequences of their indulgence. Chan’s face lit up with a smile at the sound of your giggle when Miyeon yelled at Changbin for being so loud, threatening to destroy his beloved girl group albums if he didn’t shut up.
Chan’s emotions always mirrored your own; so long as you had a smile on your face, he swore he could find joy even in the worst situations.
Even when you unknowingly shattered his heart into a million pieces, your happiness still brought him joy.
“I never got around to finishing my story,” you told him, words slurred and voice hoarse from singing at a noraebang earlier that night. “I only said I had a crush, but I never elaborated.”
Chan didn’t want you to elaborate.
But he knew how much you loved talking to him. Be it the weight of your indecision about your path in life or the lightheartedness of your romantic endeavors, you shared everything with him. You always said Chan was the best listener because he knew when his silence was better than any word. He knew that once your heart was set on something, there was no use trying to untangle your mind from the roots of that conviction.
So he hummed, prompting you to continue. “It’s been a while since you had a crush.”
“It sounds so lame, doesn’t it?” You scoffed, “Aren’t we too old for crushes?”
“No one’s ever too old for that,” he shrugged. “I think if you don’t allow yourself these light-hearted feelings, love will only become heavy. That’s never good.”
You placed your hand in his, playing with his fingers as a smile spread across your lips. Chan always hoped you couldn’t hear the way his heart thumped loudly against his chest whenever you touched him. 
“You’re so weirdly wise for your age.”
“And you’re so weirdly avoiding the subject,” Chan pointed out. “Come on, you never hesitated telling me shit like this. Hell, you proudly admitted to your crush on that old ass teacher when we were sixteen.”
You sat up straight, groaning at the unwelcome memory, and Chan huffed a laugh at the pout on your lips.
“I know, it’s just…”
“Just?”
“It’s someone you know,” you offered, and Chan furrowed his brows.
“That wouldn’t be a first.”
He noticed the way your hands tensed up, their grip on his fingers tightening and fidgeting nervously. You were anxious, and Chan wasn’t sure he wanted to know the reason why.
“It’s someone from our group.”
The way he froze was obvious, and your hands stilled on top of his. To this day, he hates everything about that moment: how you were so apprehensive about sharing something so trivial with him, how he selfishly felt a twinge of jealousy, and most importantly, how he could tell you were upset.
Chan promptly put aside his own feelings, having mastered this skill to the point where he could effortlessly do it. You seemed happy whenever you mentioned this crush, and he didn’t want to be the reason that happiness faded away. He laced your fingers together and offered you a smile, hoping you would reciprocate the gesture. You did, and he felt his chest blossoming with a blend of relief and melancholy.
“It’s Changbin,” you confessed, and Chan’s face remained unchanged. His smile didn’t so much as falter at your words. It often scared him how easy it had become to feign something as significant as his own emotions when it came to you. “I don’t know when it started, but I just… I really like him.”
Chan had seen you go through a couple of short-lived relationships and countless crushes that usually led nowhere; the sting of seeing you infatuated with someone else was an ache he’d long grown accustomed to. He often struggled to understand why your heart had chosen to love the people it did. It was easy to tease you and cope with the hurt when Chan knew it was only a matter of time before you realized you deserved more.
But that situation was different. This time, he could understand. Changbin was one of his best friends, after all. How would he endure the hurt when he knew Changbin was practically a mirror image of your ideal type? He was always in a good mood, always fun to be around and never failed to make anyone laugh. Chan had no doubts about how he would bend his back just to care for his friends — the day he failed his first class at university, Changbin paid his bill at the bar and carried a drunken, crying Chan home on his back.
Unlike it had been with Chan for the past ten years, your parents immediately fell in love with Changbin.
As he heard you eagerly talk about your crush on your friend that night, Chan kept his facade of the perfect best friend. His laughter and words perfectly matched your enthusiasm. Among the rain of anguish, the drop of bliss that fell onto his heart as he saw you smile again, your worry thoroughly gone, was enough to soothe his aching heart.
Because Chan’s emotions mirrored your own, and so he made it his mission to make you happy.
Even if it was with someone else.
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Chan never would have guessed that you and Changbin would go beyond a simple crush.
He never would have believed if he was told your relationship would evolve beyond just hooking up.
And never in his wildest dream did he imagine that you would become engaged to him.
Yet, here he sits, six years after initially finding out about your crush, helping you choose flower arrangements for your wedding.
“I think Bin would definitely want some pink flowers,” you comment with a hum, the florist nodding along with a smile. Chan holds back a sigh. “But wouldn’t that look weird with the light blue theme?”
“I think blue and pink go great together!” The florist assures you, her excitement palpable when she starts rambling about different shades and flowers that would beautifully complement your dream wedding dress.
Chan zones out, blurry eyes focused on a single red rose that rests on the wooden table. He was understandably taken aback when you chose him as your man of honor. Miyeon had always been your closest female friend, so it was only natural that he assumed you would choose her as the maid of honor. Despite disapproval from both you and Changbin’s families, you remained unwavering in your decision. Chan knew you better than anyone in the world, you argued, therefore he was the best possible choice. The sentiment was sweet, but it didn’t lessen the ache in his heart.
As if watching you marry another man wasn’t punishing enough, he now had to help you plan the ceremony.
Your laughter brings him back to the present moment, and he quickly rises from his chair, realizing you’re already heading towards the door. Chan clears his throat, shooting the florist a small smile before walking out with you.
As soon as you step onto the streets, you ask, “You were spacing out the entire time, weren’t you?”
Chan feigns offense, clutching at his chest. “What? Of course not!” He shakes his head, and you let out a chuckle. “I was totally paying attention. Blue dress, pink flowers. I got it all memorized, don’t worry.”
“So you noticed how she was shamelessly ogling you the entire time, right?”
Absentmindedly, Chan cocks his head to the side, furrowing his brows in confusion. You narrow your eyes at him, and his expression immediately shifts into a grin.
“Ah, that. Yeah, I noticed,” he shrugs. “It was your choice to have me as your man of honor.”
You bump your shoulders together, chuckling. “I guess I should’ve known. Since you’re not my fiancé, you’ll have to endure a lot of women flirting with you.”
As your words hit him, Chan clenches his jaw, suppressing the foolish pain that wells up in his chest. He is not your fiancé; he is well aware of that, but he can’t help the sharp twinge of hurt that washes over him whenever you remind him of that fact.
He silently drives you to the gym that he and Changbin opened two years ago. It was a last-ditch effort to create something that was their own rather than succumbing to a soulless office job. Starting out in a small rundown house on a sketchy street, with barely any money for proper equipment, they could never have predicted how perfectly everything would work out.
As Chan parks in front of the building, you beam while taking the notes from the florist out of your bag, eager to share them with Changbin. You two scour the gym from top to bottom, but he’s nowhere to be found. Upon asking their receptionist, they’re informed that Changbin had left a couple of hours earlier, not giving further explanations. Chan hates the familiar sight of your smile dropping, your excitement ebbing away as you carefully tuck away your notes into your bag.
Changbin has become unusually distant lately — not only toward you but everything in general. He rarely sets foot in the gym nowadays, only popping in to ensure everything is in order before hurriedly rushing off to who knows where. Chan hopes it’s only the pre-wedding nerves getting to him, and not something that will leave you shattered and heartbroken on what is supposed to be the happiest day of your life.
But that’s all he can do — cling to that hope.
Because, deep down, Chan’s mind is filled with worries that run deeper than he will ever let on. Changbin has always been an absurdly impulsive person. The fear that his friend might be regretting his decision to propose is always lingering in the back of his mind, like a persistent echo, tormenting him and gradually eroding his heart.
He doesn’t know if he can bear to see you hurt.
He certainly doesn’t want to think about what he would do if Changbin ever dared to break your heart.
Chan hates the way you easily brush off your disappointment even more, turning to flash a bright smile at him as soon as the notes are out of your sight.
“I’ll just see him at home later tonight anyway,” you simply say. “There’s no rush.”
Over the past months, Chan has seen you dismiss your own feelings regarding your fiancé countless times, so much so that he can’t even count them on one hand. From Changbin’s constant broken promises to his complete indifference toward anything related to his own wedding, the way it upsets you is evident. Still, your dismissal of it all makes him hesitant to even mention it.
Helplessly, he can’t do anything but watch, just as he has been doing for the past six years.
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A week later, the sound of the doorbell jolts Chan awake at 2 a.m.
Right after getting home from the gym, he collapsed onto the couch and dozed off before he realized. All the work he had to tackle alone left him drained. It was yet another day when Changbin vanished in the late afternoon without so much as an excuse.
Chan rushes toward the door, expecting an emergency, only to find you standing alone in the dimly lit hallway. His initial reaction was confusion; you had a spare key, after all. But as the light from his apartment hits your face, red-rimmed, teary eyes meet his own, and Chan instinctively wraps his arms around you. 
You two remain in a silent embrace for a while, with Chan selfishly reveling in the feeling of your body pressed against his. Despite your vulnerable state, he can’t help but run a hand down your back, savoring your warmth and intoxicating scent that surrounds him.
You used to hold each other frequently when you were young, thinking nothing of it and simply seeking comfort in each other’s arms. But as you entered your late teens, the tension between you became almost palpable. You no longer sought his arms solely for comfort, and that was obvious to Chan. It was obvious because he was the same. Innocent hugs evolved into wandering hands and limbs tangling in ways that were anything but platonic.
At that time, he almost thought he had stood a chance.
Until graduation day, when you two hid away inside an empty classroom, with you sat on a desk and Chan slotted between your thighs, holding you against his chest as you cried. You were always terrified of change, and school ending was an unavoidable one that had been looming over your head for a while until it snapped.
That day, you almost kissed him, your lips mere inches from his as he gripped your waist nervously, his eyes foolishly fluttering closed in anticipation.
But you pulled away, pushing him back with a whispered apology.
After that day, that habit Chan loved so much slowly faded away.
Chan hates how he has every curve of your body memorized, but rarely has the privilege of feeling you this close to him anymore.
You pull away abruptly, much like you did when you were eighteen, clearing your throat and entering his apartment without uttering a word.
Closing the door behind him, he joins you on the couch, where you sit nervously, bouncing your leg.
“What happened?” He asks, although deep down, he already knows the answer. Your only answer is a half-hearted shrug, so Chan hesitantly continues, “Is this about the wedding?”
He doesn’t miss the way your eyes well up, but you swiftly blink away any tears that threaten to spill over. Once again, Chan takes your dismissal of your own emotions as a sign for him to keep quiet.
Except this time, you don’t.
“Changbin asked to postpone the wedding,” you simply tell him.
A surge of anger washes over Chan like a tidal wave, pushing him to walk out of his apartment right now just to punch his friend in the jaw. You’re sad — Changbin made you sad. No matter how hard Chan tries or how much he sacrifices, moments like these always serve as a sour reminder that your happiness isn’t solely dependent on him.
He despises these moments.
“I feel like he’s so different. Even before proposing,” you murmur, lowering your head and focusing on your nails, nervously picking at your chipped nail polish. “We hardly ever go on dates and he never makes jokes or does silly shit to make me laugh anymore. I know it’s stupid and even a bit selfish, but I miss those things.”
You let out a heavy sigh and slowly looked up to meet Chan’s gaze. He silently wishes he could absorb all the hurt you feel.
“That’s the man that made me want to stay for six years, and he’s just… gone.”
Chan nervously gnaws on his bottom lip, as if that will consume the words in his throat before they slip out. But these words have been lingering on the tip of his tongue for over five months. Ever since you gathered your little friend group in your living room on a rainy Sunday evening, beaming as you and Changbin announced your engagement.
Tonight, these unspoken words finally escape his lips.
“Why did you accept the proposal, then?” He asks softly.
You let out a bitter scoff and sink lower into his couch.
“Guess I thought that man would magically come back the moment I said yes. But he didn’t,” you shake your head. “So I ignored it, assured myself he would come back once I said ‘I do’. Now, I’m not even sure…” You trail off, pursing your lips as the sentence dissipates into the air.
He remembers the early years of your relationship with Changbin. You would call Chan just to swoon over his charming personality and jokingly scold him for keeping your boyfriend at the gym until late at night. He recalls how you used to melt at his sweet gestures, like bringing you a cup of coffee after your shift or carrying you up to your apartment when you dozed off in the car. A few months ago, he noticed your avoidance whenever Changbin was brought up, and your usual long-winded stories about him were now replaced with short answers.
But he remained quiet, like he’d always done.
A few minutes pass before you speak again, and your words strike him like an unexpected left hook, knocking the air out of his lungs.
“I thought about ending things a lot,” you confess, “When I noticed this change wasn’t wavering, I was ready to leave.”
“But you didn’t,” Chan counters.
Your lips curl into a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes as you slowly nod. “But I didn’t,” you simply say. “I was afraid of what that would do to our friend group. It’s stupid, right?” You rhetorically ask.
When your gazes meet, your eyes are devoid of any emotion, a stark contrast to the usual spark he’s always loved. It’s as if you’ve abandoned any hope you had left inside of you, and his heart sinks.
“I didn’t want things to change because of me.”
Chan sighs. “You shouldn’t sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of others,” he tells you, and the irony isn’t lost on him. He inwardly grimaces, because isn’t that exactly what he has been doing for most of his life?
But it’s different, he rationalizes. It’s different because it’s you.
“You know me, Chan,” you huff out, wrapping your arms around yourself as frustration slowly consumes you. “I hate making people sad, hate knowing things are worse because of me.”
That’s just another of the many things Chan hates — how fucking similar you and he are.
“That’s why everybody says you shouldn’t date your friends, huh?” You let out a bitter scoff. “It never works out. Just fucks everything up.”
Chan bites down on his bottom lip so hard he swears he tastes blood on his tongue.
“That’s not always the case,” he’s quick to add. “Remember when Jun and Miyeon dated? They broke up and things were awkward for a while but—”
“They were together for a few months, Chan, not six years,” you interrupt him with a scowl. “If Changbin and I had broken up, our little group would’ve been just as affected as us. People would pick sides, try to place the blame on someone, and things would inevitably change.”
“Things are bound to change at some point,” he reasons. “We’re not in college anymore.”
Chan is certain there’s something more stopping you from ending your relationship, but he’s afraid you’re also unsure of that reason.
“I love Changbin,” you suddenly say, turning your body to face Chan. “This is stupid, I’m sorry I came here in the first place. He’s just stressed, he’s gonna come back one day—”
“Stop talking like that,” Chan cuts you off, voice louder than he intended. You slowly tilt your head to the side, eyeing him with confusion. “Stop talking like Changbin isn’t here, like he’s distant because he has no choice. He hasn’t gone anywhere. He’s still here, and he’s still distant.”
You divert your eyes, focusing on a spot behind Chan, making him wonder if he crossed a line. When the seconds tick by and you remain silent, he braces himself to watch you leave.
Instead, you whisper, “I know.”
“I would never treat you like this,” he absentmindedly says, his own eyes wandering aimlessly around his living room, looking anywhere but at you. If he tries hard enough, he can almost pretend that he isn’t saying these words to you, that he isn’t essentially confessing his repressed feelings to his best friend, who is already engaged. “Would never propose to you and have you plan the fucking wedding only to ask you to postpone it,” he lets out a scoff, his face contorting with disdain. “Fuck off. Postpone it? Changbin’s a coward.”
“I feel so alone,” you admit, seemingly ignoring his unprompted soliloquy. “You know I hate feeling alone. If I were to end things with Changbin now, after all these years, I know this loneliness would kill me.”
And you’re right; Chan knows better than anyone how much you hate feeling alone. Whenever your parents had to leave for business trips or vacations, you would seek refuge at his house to avoid being alone. When your roommate kicked you out of your dorm during university, you begged him to sleep with you in the study area so you wouldn’t be alone in the dark.
The thought of you spending your days alone in your apartment and sleeping by yourself at night makes Chan feel as if his heart is being trampled on.
“You’re not alone. I’m here,” he assures you, his eyes finally lifting to meet your gaze. “I’ve been here since we were kids, and I’m not going anywhere.”
A giggle suddenly escapes from your lips, and your hand rests on his arm. Your gaze shifts to where your fingers delicately trace patterns on the sleeve of his shirt.
“Remember when we were thirteen? We promised to get married if we were still alone when we were adults.”
Chan nods slowly, and an uneasy feeling washes over him. It’s been years since you’ve been this physically close to him, toying with the fabric of his shirt and saying words that foolishly make him think you might be flirting with him. Why must you bring this up now? Now, when you’re certainly not alone, but very much engaged to one of your mutual friends.
“I feel like every childhood friend makes that silly promise,” he tries to deflect, a forced chuckle leaving his lips. Nevertheless, the small smile on your lips lingers as you dismissively shrug at his words.
“It wasn’t silly to me,” you argue. “I meant it. Especially when I realized you were the only one who always stayed, even when everyone else seemed to leave me.”
He only now realizes how you’ve inched even closer to him, your foot softly brushing along his leg and your fingertips now delicately gliding along his arms, causing goosebumps to ripple across his skin. The small voice of reason inside his already clouded mind desperately urges him to back away, but his body refuses to move.
And then you gently intertwine your fingers with his and finally meet his eyes. Chan instinctively closes the small distance between you, his shoulder brushing against yours as you shift on the couch to throw your legs over his lap like you used to do when you were kids — except now, the gesture is anything but innocent, the air almost suffocating Chan with a looming sense of anticipation.
“Y’know, my mom was so happy when I told her I was dating Changbin,” you huff out a laugh at the memory, and Chan’s lips twitch into a small scowl. Although you speak as though this is news to him, he’s fully aware of what you’re referring to. He was sitting in your bedroom with you the day you told your mom. He knows what you’re alluding to, and he knows it’s wrong, but he finds himself simply nodding along to your words. “She was laughing about how scared she was that I would pick you. She was so sure we would end up together, and she hated it.”
It was never a secret how much your parents disliked Chan, although he never understood their reasons. Your mom always treated him with just enough feigned kindness that it wasn’t a glaring disdain, but you were quick to tell him all the things they would whisper behind his back.
Chan gently brushes a strand of hair behind your ear, his fingertips then gliding along your face, tracing a path from the curve of your ear to your cheek. His eyes carefully follow his movements, and you suck in a breath, leaning into the touch.
“I also kind of hoped for that,” he mutters, barely audible.
“I’m so lonely, Chan,” you whisper back, and he feels every corner of his heart shatter into a million little pieces. The way your eyes glisten with unshed tears in the dim lighting of his living room finally has his resolve crumbling.
“You’re not alone,” he reiterates. “I’m here.”
Before he can stop himself, Chan closes the small distance between you and crashes his lips to yours. Just as guilt begins to course through his veins, you tug at his shirt, pulling him even closer until you ultimately climb onto his lap. Chan’s lips delicately brush against yours at first, but the kiss soon grows feverish. His hunger for you has been building inside of him for an eternity, and now that he’s finally tasted you, the all-consuming desire to have you overrides any remaining rationality in his mind.
His tongue glides along the seam of your lips before slipping into your mouth, and he all but growls at the feeling. Your fingers tighten their grip on his shirt, digging into the fabric while you let out the sweetest sound Chan has ever heard.
You slowly grind in his lap, and his hands grip your hips tightly, his cock twitching even at the soft movement. A surge of clarity washes over him, and he wonders how something this wrong can feel so good. Wonders why Changbin was lucky enough to have you like this whenever he wanted, while he was left to pine and yearn for years.
“What are we doing?” He asks between kisses, and you let out a shuddering sigh, shaking your head.
You whisper, “I don’t know. Just want you.”
A small part of Chan wants to push you away, knowing you’re simply seeking solace in him, desperately searching in him for what you no longer have with Changbin. But a bigger part of him has been yearning to have you for far too long to refuse your request.
He drowns out every faint whisper of reason in his head and slots his lips over yours once more, your soft moans traveling straight to his cock. Slipping your hands underneath his shirt, your palms raise toward his chest, nails lightly grazing his skin before trailing down the tense muscles of his abdomen. Chan whines when your fingertips brush against his clothed cock, already achingly hard in the confines of his pants. It was almost pitiful how effortlessly you made him desperate, his thoughts consumed with only you.
You break the kiss to pull down the straps of your dress, unhurriedly, eyeing him with a grin while he watches the thin fabric pool around your thighs.
“Y’know I always wondered what it’d be like,” you breathe out, and Chan’s lips fall open as you gently palm him through his sweatpants. “Always thought about what it’d feel like to have you fuck me.”
“Fuck,” he rasps out, cock swelling further in your hands when you squeeze his length. “Don’t say shit like that.”
You simply giggle, and Chan lets out a low groan, grinding his hips into your hand, desperately seeking more friction. He doesn’t want to think about the weight of that statement — not when your fingertips brush against his lower stomach, teasingly toying with the waistband of his sweatpants before finally pushing it down, gripping his cock in your hand. Chan hisses, his hold on your hips tightening while you glide your hand along his length, finding a slow, tantalizing rhythm as you begin to stroke him.
He feels as if his hands are tied by silent guilt, as if touching you any more will somehow make everything too real. But you press your lips to his like it’s second nature, swirling your tongue in his mouth just as your thumb swipes across his slit, gathering a drop of precum before smearing it down his shaft. It’s too much, and Chan groans into the kiss, finally allowing himself to touch you.
Carefully, his hands travel from your hips up to your stomach, caressing the soft skin. The way you feel underneath his fingertips has him drunk with lust, like a flood of long-awaited desire and longing finally being released.
“Touch me,” you whisper, words almost muffled by his lips. “Please.”
And Chan’s never been able to deny you.
His fingers skim over your breasts, trembling hands squeezing through the delicate lace of your bra. Your body eagerly responds to his touch, your nipples pebbling beneath his hands and a soft sigh falling from your lips. It feels like heaven to know that he’s the one coaxing these sounds out of you, and it’s enough to snuff out any trace of guilt Chan had remaining inside of him. As he pinches your nipples, rolling them gently between his fingertips, a surge of pleasure shoots through your body, making you jerk on his lap, your grip on his cock tightening.
Chan grins. “I thought about it too,” he admits, words softly whispered as he leans closer and presses his forehead against yours. “Thought about fucking you so much it almost drove me insane.”
These confessions are only half-surprising if Chan were completely honest with himself. He knew exactly where his mind wandered whenever you two got tangled up in his bed when you were teens, and he convinced himself you were the same. At that time, it was merely an attempt to alleviate the guilt he felt for having those thoughts about you.
But this confirmation was all he needed to truly surrender to his selfish hunger.
His hand slowly moves down your stomach, edging closer and closer to your panties. Your eyes remain locked on his, your heavy breathing brushing against his lips when his fingers tentatively slip beneath the soft fabric.
“Can I?” He whispers, and you nod, stroking him almost feverishly as your eyes become completely lust-clouded.
Chan’s fingers slide between your slick folds, a guttural moan reverberating through his chest, his cock twitching under your fingers.
“Holy shit, you’re soaking wet,” he groaned, his thumb softly pressing down on your clit, causing you to grind your hips into his hand.
“Chan,” you breathe out.
Your once deliberate strokes fizzled out into languid touches, but Chan couldn’t bring himself to care. Not when you were this fucking wet, all because of him.
“Tell me what you want,” he hums, pressing a small kiss to your open lips. He grins when your only response is a whine, rolling your hips forward once more. “Tell me.”
“Want you, Chan,” you choke out, “Want anything you wanna give me.”
Chan bites back a growl, slowly sliding a finger inside of you, your walls greedily clenching around it while your hips begin rocking in his lap, his thumb circling your clit. He can feel your arousal coating his finger, curling the digit before pulling away only to push back in again, two fingers now gently pumping in and out of you.
Pressing his lips to your throat, Chan grapples with the overwhelming need to mark you, bite and suck on your sensitive skin until it bloomed in hues of red and purple when you moaned so sweetly for him. The thought of Changbin coming home only to find you claimed by him had Chan groaning against the pulse of your neck, his cock throbbing in your hand just as your palm languidly circles the swollen head.
“Wanna make love to you,” he murmurs against your skin, leaving soft kisses up your throat until his lips are pressing against yours. Love — as if this was anything like love. “I need to,” he all but begs, and you hastily nod, tugging his shirt over his head and crashing your lips together.
Chan pushes your body down onto the couch, his heavy-lidded eyes dark like the shadows that covered his living room as he stares down at you. He’s wanted this for so long, dreaming and fantasizing about it to the point of pitifulness. Yet now, he hesitates. It’s almost as if everything else you have done tonight could be forgotten — maybe even forgiven — but the moment the images from his daydreams stumbled out into the real world, everything would truly be ruined.
“Chan,” your voice brings him back to the moment, his gaze softening at the way you looked up at him. “Don’t overthink this.”
He bends his face to yours, huffing out a breath. “It’s kinda hard not to.”
“Worry about tomorrow when tomorrow comes,” you whisper, and Chan smiles. He slides a hand through your hair, brushing a stray piece from your eyes.
His focus is quickly brought back to the scorching heat of his cock resting against your lower stomach, precum dripping from the tip and gathering on your skin. Gently brushing against your lower lip with the pad of his thumb, he fits himself between your open thighs, and you press a chaste kiss to his fingertip.
Chan effortlessly lifts you, blunt nails sinking into the soft skin of your ass as he watches you slide your panties down your thighs before he aligns your hips with his. He glides his cock along your folds, teasing your clit with each movement. The heat from your arousal coating him seems to sear into his skin, and he immerses himself in his desire even deeper. He carefully studies your features when you squeeze his shoulders, eyes tracing a slow path down your face, and Chan is certain he wouldn’t mind waging a war against every inconvenient obstacle that kept him from seeing that glint of bliss on your eyes every day.
His tip grazes your entrance as he pulls back, lips tracing along your skin before slowly pushing into you. As much as Chan wants to take his time, savor the experience and explore every inch of your body until it becomes seared into his memory, he knows he won’t be able to do that tonight. Years of yearning and longing finally came pouring out, consuming him with the want to selfishly chase this long-desired feeling.
When his hips meet yours, he takes your hand in his, guiding it to press on your lower abdomen. Your lips fall open slightly, the feeling of his cock pressing against your belly causing your eyes to flutter shut, and Chan’s arousal becomes almost unbearable. It was almost like a false testament, fooling him into believing you were finally one, even though it was nothing but a pretty lie.
“We’re a perfect fit. Shit,” Chan hisses, your inner muscles clenching around him at his words.
His thumb pressed firmly against your throbbing clit as he began rolling his hips, falling into a gentle and steady tempo. Your legs wrap around his body, hips rolling up and silently urging him to move faster, matching the rhythm of his unspoken longing. 
“Chan, please,” your voice chokes out. You intertwine your fingers together, wrapping an arm around his shoulder, eyes looking at him almost pleadingly. “Need you to fuck me.”
He snaps at your soft plea, pulling back and thrusting into you harshly, barely retreating from your wetness before plunging back in. Your nails dig into his skin, scoring lines down his chest while your other hand squeezes his. Chan winces at the sting but revels in the fact that you’re marking him — something he could only ever dream of doing to you.
He reluctantly lets go of your hand to firmly grasp your ass, forcefully lifting your hips to draw you even closer to him, fingernails etching crescent moons into your soft skin in an almost petulant attempt at claiming you as his. At least for tonight. Chan’s thumb rubs circles around your clit, bringing you closer to the edge of your orgasm. His grip on your skin tightens, pulling your body toward him almost desperately. His thrusts soon grow sloppy, his once deliberate rhythm long forgotten as his control quickly ebbs away.
“Got no idea what you do to me,” Chan grunts, pressing his forehead to yours. “If you were mine— fuck,” He hisses when you clench around him at his words — at the idea of being his. “I’d be so good to you. Fuck you like this every night.”
You attempt to call out his name, but the sound dies at your throat with a whine. Looking for purchase among his forceful thrusts, your hands travel up his chest and clutch at his shoulders with a tight grip.
“Then fuck me like I’m yours,” you choke out, hooking your ankles behind him to keep him as close to you as possible. Chan’s only response is a low, guttural growl, which is soon swallowed by your sighs as he crashes his lips into yours.
You arch your back, breaking the kiss with a cry, muscles tightening while Chan continues to plunge into you at a merciless rhythm. Your cunt throbs around his length, the relentless pressure of his finger on your clit sending shivers of euphoria through your entire body, drawing out your climax. Chan feels lightheaded, the beautiful sight of your orgasm enough to drive him to the edge.
As his cock twitches inside of you, he reluctantly leans back, rising to his knees and wrapping his fingers around his length, stroking himself over your body while you watch him with half-lidded eyes. A low sound rumbles within Chan’s chest as his hips jerk against his fist. His release spills from his cock and paints your stomach with milky streaks of his cum, finally marking you as his.
At least for tonight.
Even though it’s nothing but a pretty lie.
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As you wake up, the unfamiliar sensation of sunlight streaming through the window hits your tired eyes. Panic washes over you for a beat as you take in the feeling of an unfamiliar bed, but a familiar scent soon envelops you, instantly soothing you. Not waking up alone also feels unfamiliar, but it’s a welcomed unfamiliarity. You turn your body towards the person next to you, and you’re greeted by Chan, peacefully asleep with a small smile on his lips. A grin slowly spreads across your face too.
It had been so long since you were this close to him, even longer since you woke up beside him. Sleepovers were common during your childhood, but they naturally stopped as you grew older. You were nineteen the last time you lied next to Chan like this, drunk on cheap beer and cramped next to him on a worn-out couch of some fraternity house. You remember how his chest slowly rising and falling somehow felt like home, and how his soft snores lulled you into sleep.
Your love for Chan has always been greater than you’ve let on.
Your vicious need to please those around you hindered your ability to express how much you loved him. Your parents hated him since you were fifteen. Catching Chan smoking with a group of boys from your school behind the mall cemented their opinion of him. Despite his ‘bad influence’, they reluctantly allowed your friendship to continue, with the condition that you wouldn’t be swayed by his bad ways.
If only they knew what you did last night.
If only they knew how you were the one to incite him, letting your own bad ways tarnish him.
As your eyes flutter closed, memories of the night before flood your mind; Chan’s hands on your body, his hungry kisses, and the way he fucked you until you felt intoxicated. But the feeling of bliss swirling in your chest quickly dissipates, replaced by the weight of guilt, crushing your ribs and knocking the air from your lungs. Your eyes snap open, and you sit up on the bed with a shuddering sigh. Even the feeling of Chan’s clothes clinging to your body makes you feel dirty.
Beside you, Chan groans, your sudden movements having disturbed his sleep.
“What time is it?” He rasps out. The sound of his voice alone nearly makes you flinch. As his fingertips graze your arm, you instinctively withdraw as if his touch scorched your skin. Chan sits up as well. “What’s wrong?”
You almost scoff at his words.
“Nothing,” you lie, throwing the covers off your body. You frantically search his bedroom until your eyes land on your dress draped over a chair.
You take off Chan’s shirt in haste, spitefully throwing the fabric on the floor as though it embodied your every sin. As if removing it from your body would somehow absolve you from what you chose to do last night. Just as you reach to undo the drawstrings of his sweatpants, his touch lingers on your skin again. You can’t help but flinch once more.
“Hey, calm down. Please, talk to me,” Chan’s soft voice only intensifies the anguish in your chest.
“Don’t touch me,” you mumble, tears gathering in your eyes as remorse gathers in your throat until it feels as if you’re suffocating. Chan removes his hands from your arm but remains beside you. “What the fuck did we do? We betrayed his trust, we betrayed…” you trail off, because you can’t even bring yourself to say Changbin’s name out loud. Finally, you turn to face Chan, shaking your head in disbelief. “He’s our friend. He’s my fucking fiancé.”
Chan stays silent. Tears stream out of your eyes, cascading down your cheeks and onto the floor. Your shoulders tremble, and each breath you take cannot fill your lungs enough to ease the weight on your chest. Chan stands in front of you, his tear-filled eyes mirroring his own heartbreak, evident in every corner of his face. He reaches out to you several times, but his hands only clench into fists and drop by his sides every time.
He helplessly watches as your tears fall over something that was a choice. A momentary bliss, a whim that has proven to be unnecessary, even though your feelings for Chan have always gone beyond platonic. How you wish you could go back in time and prioritize your own happiness instead of constantly sacrificing it for the sake of others. But you can’t, and the once beautiful love you had for Chan now only feels tainted.
He watches you silently, unmoving until you finally swallow enough tears to choke out, “Please hold me.”
And Chan does, cold hands wrapping around your trembling body as fresh tears pour out of your eyes, cascade down your cheeks and onto his shirt.
  You cry the entire afternoon, guilt becoming a ghost that haunts you as you pad around Chan’s apartment. Yet you can’t bring yourself to leave his side. Soon, his clothes stopped feeling like a vice tightening around your neck and transformed into a soothing embrace.
The only words you exchange are over cold leftover pizza. Chan says it’s best to just pretend the previous night never even happened. You’re quick to tell him you don’t want that.
“It was a mistake,” he quietly told you.
“It was a choice,” you corrected him. “And I’m happy I did it.”
And that’s the worst part of it all; you don’t regret having sex with Chan. You regret the cheating, the pain this would cause Changbin if he knew, and you especially dread the scrutiny you would face if people were to find out. But not even for a second do you feel any regret about Chan.
Before you know it, it’s already dark out. You find yourself staring out the window, pulling at the hem of Chan’s shirt that still hugs your frame.
You don’t want to go back home.
Four messages from Changbin apologizing for not coming home last night greet you every time you unlock your phone.
Changbin: hey baby, sorry Changbin: there was a huge fight at the bar, seungmin was bloody on the floor before i knew it Changbin: had to stay and take care of him after i took him home Changbin: i’m so sorry. i’ll make it up to you. love you
You ignore them every time. You don’t feel bad about it.
“I don’t wanna go back home,” you mumble to yourself. Behind you, Chan hums softly.
It feels like an eternity before he finally breaks the silence.
“Then don’t go.”
So you don’t.
Time slips away from your hands, and suddenly a week has gone by. You stay at Chan’s apartment, working from his computer, eating his food, and wearing his clothes. He makes love to you and you sleep in his bed every night.
You avoid every mirror and close every curtain as if that will shield you from your sins.
For so much time, it felt as if you were crawling through endless days, constantly brushing aside the things that upset you, things you fruitlessly wished you could change. All while forcing a smile that long stopped being sincere. This week, your smile was tightly bound to a warmth in your heart that had been absent for far too long.
Cooped up inside Chan’s apartment like a fugitive from your own mistakes, you were finally happy.
You have always lived a life driven by the desire to please others. From the university you attended to the man you chose to be with; everything was carefully thought out to ensure the happiness of those around you. Was it a wonder you were so soulless?
Is it a wonder you found bliss in doing something so selfish for the first time in your life? Every time Chan touched you, it was like a small light was ignited inside you.
Changbin’s messages sat unread in your phone; the only ones he sent you the entire week. 
  You chose to return home the day your mother called you to ask about the wedding. Chan drove you in silence while you clutched his hand.
As soon as you step into your apartment, it’s as if all the light Chan brought back into your life the past week is snuffed out. You glance around the dark living room, your eyes then traveling toward your bedroom, only being met by more darkness. Seems your fiancé still hasn’t come back.
Changbin going to that bar was the catalyst for your spiral of mistakes. He’s often gone to bars, and you never thought much of it, until he started prioritizing his time with his friends over time with you. That night, you had asked him to stay in for a change, suggesting you could watch a movie and order too much food like you used to do when you first moved in together. He said he would love that, but that night was really important. Apparently, Jisung needed help chatting up the bartender, and that was crucial in his road to getting over his ex. Apparently, that was more important than spending time with you.
You were arguing before you knew it. Although you did most of the talking, so it felt more like a helpless monologue than a proper fight. Changbin hated fights, and had mastered the art of dismissing things and never addressing them again. He was out the door right after nonchalantly asking you to postpone the wedding.
“I’m not in the right headspace to deal with shit like that now,” he’d said, and you scoffed at how he referred to your wedding.
“Flower arrangements, color schemes, guest lists… I’d rather do anything else but that right now. My friends need me,” Changbin continued after you remained silent, because you knew you would only end up arguing with him again if you were to speak. He spoke as if you didn’t need him.
“Jisung is finally taking the steps to get over that shitty ex of his and you know Chan can’t run the gym without me,” were the last words he muttered before pressing a kiss to your forehead and leaving you alone for yet another night.
The mention of his name was all it took for you to run out the door and into Chan’s apartment.
After dragging yourself toward your bathroom for a quick shower, you berate yourself for feeling disappointed in the feeling of your own pajamas against your skin. After a week of being enveloped in Chan’s scent, the smell of your clothes seems almost foreign.
Even as you lie in bed, it somehow feels even colder now than it did during all the countless nights when you were alone. Just as you had grown used to the empty space beside you, it now feels wrong not to feel the warmth of Chan’s body pressed up against yours.
You shudder at that thought.
It wasn’t just anyone you missed in your bed. It was Chan.
In a way, it had always been him.
As you drift off to sleep, the sudden shifting of the mattress jolts you awake. Changbin is home. You inwardly curse yourself, as you won’t be able to feign sleep after being startled by his presence. He chuckles softly, slipping under the covers and pulling you close, a strong arm tightly wrapping around your waist. The dim light of your bedroom hides your grimace as he pulls your body flush against his, but you can’t help but flinch.
It feels wrong.
Just as much as Chan’s body had felt perfectly aligned with yours, Changbin’s mere presence feels out of place.
“Didn’t mean to scare you, babe,” Changbin apologizes, planting a gentle kiss on your shoulder. You mindlessly nod. “Though I’m glad you’re awake. I missed you.”
His soft kisses soon travel up the column of your throat, and you bite the inside of your cheek. Changbin effortlessly moves your body so you’re lying on your back, a soft smile playing on his lips as he leans in to kiss you.
And it feels wrong.
His tongue swipes against your lower lip, soon pushing against yours, and his taste has you clutching your fists. He slots himself between your thighs like he’s done countless times, and the weight of his body on top of you has your face twisting into a scowl. He slips a hand underneath your shirt, and the feeling of his calloused fingers across your skin has you instinctively pushing him away.
Changbin looks stunned for a beat, but his lips soon curl into a playful grin.
“Not in the mood?” He simply asks, and it makes you want to cry.
Because Changbin has always been the perfect man. He was gentle, never demanding, and always so caring to you. Even after his sudden change, his only flaw was how distant he’s become.
He is completely unaware of how you callously hurt him in the worst way possible, and the weight of that realization erases any urge you had to cry. You don’t deserve that relief.
After pressing a quick kiss to your forehead, Changbin sits up on the bed. You remain motionless, focusing on how the moonlight casts shadows on the ceiling instead of how your heart twists painfully inside your chest. You only break out of this trance once he hums beside you.
“Your mom called,” he tells you, his fingers swiping across his phone screen when you face him. “Forgot to tell you. I had to tell her we chose to postpone the wedding,” he chuckles casually, and you tightly clutch the covers.
Fuck.
“I didn’t wanna tell her yet, but…” you trail off with a shaky sigh. “I guess it’s okay.”
Changbin shrugs dismissively. “Yeah, she told me you avoided the topic when she called you. She was upset, though I don’t get it,” he scoffs. “We’re still getting married, just not now.”
Those words are enough to have your heart shatter completely.
Sadly, the happiness your selfishness brought you that week is nothing compared to the sorrow that envelops you for disappointing your mother.
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Chan gave you the space he knew you needed.
Even though you gave him the happiest six days of his entire bleak existence only to leave him alone and wondering, he gave you space.
The way he forgot about everything else during those days with you was almost like a fantasy. Inside the little atmosphere you created, it was just the two of you and the love he had kept hidden for so long. He needed nothing more.
And then you left, and he gave you space.
Until the days turned into weeks, and he watched as two months slipped through his fingers like sand. Even though Changbin hadn’t visited the gym in over three months, Chan’s heart still clung to the hope that he would show up, longing for the chance to ask about you. He also hoped you’d reach out, even if it meant you’d ignore everything that happened in your little world and simply talk about the weather.
Every day, his hopes are shattered into a million little pieces.
He’d take anything over your silence. He would take you as a friend over as a familiar stranger in a heartbeat, would take his heart being broken over not having you at all. He endured that for over a decade, and he would happily ruin himself for you every single day.
And so Chan finds himself knocking at your door, his shirt clinging to his chest after a relentless afternoon of punching the sandbag in his office, futilely hoping to escape thoughts of you. He eventually walked out of the gym, heart pounding in his chest as he sprinted to your apartment as if he was scared you would disappear. Because he was.
As you slowly open the door, he finally stands before you. Your eyes widen as you take in his appearance — his ruddy cheeks, labored breath, and shaky hands that fumble to fix his disheveled hair. But Chan swears you’re the sole culprit for his heart hammering against his ribcage.
“What are you—”
“I want you to pretend it never happened,” he exasperates, “Pretend we never said anything, never did anything, just pretend. We can pretend together, I don’t care. Just don’t cut me out of your life like this.”
“Chan,” you murmur, pursing your lips before continuing. “I don’t… I don’t understand.”
“You said you didn’t wanna pretend that nothing happened between us. You said that,” he argues, trying but ultimately failing his attempt at keeping his voice down.
Chan feels as if his mind is unraveling. Every emotion he kept nestled inside his chest for years had finally spilled out the moment your lips touched his, and trying to bury this love again felt like a cruel punishment.
“Back in my apartment, I told you we should just pretend nothing happened, but you…” his voice dissipates into a sigh, the words dying at his throat, replaced by a lump that swelled in his throat.
He feels pathetic, adverting his gaze simply to blink away the tears that have gathered in his lashes. But when he turns to look at you again, your eyes are already pouring.
“I’m sorry,” you bawl, fingers gripping the doorframe until your knuckles turn white. “Chan, I’m so fucking sorry, but I can’t do this.”
Chan gnaws on his bottom lip, his eyes fixed on you as you turn and walk away, leaving him alone by your door. As he watches your figure disappear into the hallway, he realizes he cannot bear the agony of only helplessly watching you any longer.
“You said you were happy,” he yells out, following after you like a phantom you carelessly disregard. The sound of his voice echoes behind you, ignored as you enter the kitchen and resume drying plates and cutlery. Chan continues, “You started it. You chose to cross that line, chose to stay, chose to keep letting me make love to you every damn night—”
You drop a plate on the counter with a scowl, the delicate porcelain chipping at the edge. “Love?” You scoff bitterly at Chan, shaking your head. “That wasn’t love. That was a mistake.”
“That’s not what you said,” Chan retorts, and your eyes soften. He breathes out a heavy sigh. At this point, he knows he’s gone beyond desperation. He still continues, “Tell me you weren’t happy.”
“Chan…”
“Tell me,” he insists. “Tell me and I’ll gladly pretend with you.”
“I was scared!” You blurt out, “That week with you was the happiest I had been in so long, and it terrified me. But maybe that’s love, huh? Being selfish, putting myself before everyone else and acting like a fucking teenager. That’s surely love,” you scoff, words dripping with sarcasm.
A heavy silence falls between you. Chan is back in that familiar place, watching you engage in a silent battle within yourself, distant eyes almost boring holes into the chipped plate in your hands. Deep inside, he knows you’re right. It is selfish to want you to abandon everything you built for a dormant love you both buried so long ago.
But maybe being selfish is exactly what you both need. Maybe love isn’t selflessness, maybe it’s the complete opposite.
“Maybe that’s the love we deserve,” Chan breaks the deafening silence, carefully stepping closer to you. “After all these years of stupidly sacrificing our own happiness, maybe selfish love is the kind of love we need.”
But you remain silent. Your eyes wander around, almost as if you’re taking in the life that reflects the choices you’ve made. The walls of your hallway, adorned with polaroid pictures telling your story with Changbin, from just friends to the night of your engagement. Your fridge, where colorful magnets hold up little notes from Changbin, filled with sweet nothings and inside jokes. Chan notices the date on the most recent one, realizing it was over seven months ago.
As the minutes tick by, Chan braces himself for your words. He’s ready to be called insane, for you to yell and rightfully reject any notion of continuing your friendship. He knows there’s no going back to the way things were. That possibility died the moment you stepped into his apartment that fateful night.
Instead, you gaze up at him and whisper four words that leave him completely stunned.
“Run away with me.”
And Chan’s never been able to deny you.
Before you two can even make sense of anything, you’re already in your bedroom. Chan packs your bags while you kneel beside your bed, hastily jotting down words on a piece of paper. Your sudden giggle has him biting back a smile that blossoms on his face when you wrap your arms around his neck, bringing him into a deep kiss. He sighs into your lips. Your love was unearthed, dirty and tainted, but still breathing. It was sinful and borderline cataclysmic, but it was yours.
Since you were both ten years old, it has always been yours.
Your letter to Changbin hangs alongside the love notes he’d left for you over the years; selfish words nestled between sincere ones.
Inside his car, Chan’s hand intertwines with yours, and he watches your lips curl into a smile that finally reaches your eyes. It’s the first time he’s seen that expression grace your face in years.
And Chan’s emotions mirrored your own, so he made it his mission to make that happiness everlasting.
Even if it was through a selfish love.
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♡ taglist: @bloom-ings, @linocz, @farahia, @mirbokk, @jisunglyricist, @jazziwritesthings, @seungseung-minmin, @yourcvndx, @hynjinnnnnnnie, @vlctorriaa, @redstayrosie, @binniesbabygirl, @pynchkilledme, @chansbabygirlsstuff, @pheonixfire777, @yongbokkiesworld, @kiensecent
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kurishiri · 5 months ago
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Mystery Bag 2025 ┊ Team 2: The trash bastards and the troubled fox
Harrison, Alfons, Jude, Nica
꒰ ִ ֺ ⊹ @ notice ⊹ ֺ ִ ꒱ this translation may not be 100% accurate or contain creative liberties due to narrative flow and characterization purposes. if you enjoy, please consider reblogging, but please don’t repost these or claim these as your own!
— the mystery bag 2025 sale is a story set sale where the guys are put into teams and participate in a relay event thing. this is one of three teams (i love al too much to pass this by aa orz)! you can read the prologue, translated by @.judesmoonbeauty, here.
— cw: mentions of drugging or spiking drinks, bribing, and groping.
——Group 2 for the preliminary contest: Harrison, Alfons, Jude, Nica.
[SKY]
Steering committee: Then, we will begin the round for group 2.
Steering committee: Who will reach the goal first and emerge the happy boy for 2025?!
Steering committee: Let us go all out! Take your places, and…start!
[PARK - DAY]
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Harrison: Oh, jeez, that was fast. So, why are you guys all standing there?
Alfons: Since the spectators are no longer in sight, so I figured if it was around now or so,
A: it would be a good time to drop this act of competing to the hardest and fullest.
Harrison: What? (O_O)
H: Or wait a minute, I’m pretty sure Al’s no exception; you guys are scheming something weird, aren’t you.
Jude: Who are ya gonna blame when ya don’t have a drop o’ evidence on ya? Way to make others out as the villain.
Nica: Agreed. I wouldn’t dream of scheming anything so bad in broad daylight, you know.
Harrison: Your lies are so damn obvious. I don’t even need to use my ability to figure that out.
H: If you all get caught, would you be alright getting disqualified?
Alfons: Oh, goodness, shiver me timbers. I’ll be honest, so hold your silence, alright?
A: I’m sure you’re aware there is a spot you can take a quick water break a bit up ahead, no?
A: I maaay or may not have pulled an ever so slight trick on the drinks.
A: Said trick being a sleeping drug that can knock one out immediately.
Harrison: You’re the worst.
Jude: Well, seems like somethin’ that walkin’ offense to public morals would pull outta his arse.
Alfons: And what of you?
Jude: Jus’ gave some money on a stick to the committee and told ‘em to tamper with the info and give us the win.
J: There’s been a wave o’ people, so it wouldn’t get outed.
Harrison: You’re no better.
Nica: I’d expect nothing less from the company president, dirtying your hands. Someone as well-bred as me could never.
Harrison: And? What’s up your sleeve?
Nica: Now don’t go lumping me together with that mirror man and president.
N: All I did was use my superior intellect and surveying skills. …Say, did you know?
N: This time, beneath the course there’s a sewer. One that’ll lead you right next to the goal.
N: So I was thinking of slipping underground, bide my time… and take first place.
Jude & Alfons: What a bastard. / Very much as low as trash.
Nica: You guys are the last ones I want to be called ‘trash bastards’ from.
Harrison: Damn, it’s trash bastards left and right.
H: So? What did you hope to gain from all this?
Alfons: Why of course, it’s to use Her Majesty’s authority to do this and that and aaall things in between.
Harrison: I was a fool for ever asking.
H: What about you, Jude?
Jude: Anythin’ goes. There’s a whole load o’ things I wanna do with the Queenie’s authority.
J: Well, I’d bet that bad guy over there would ask for somethin’ ridiculous.
Nica: As if. I’m just trying to earn what I very much love — money.
N: There’s never enough money to go around.
Harrison: If that’s what you really think, then I’ll leave it at that.
Nica: …Being able to pick up on lies, huh. You’ve got a troublesome ability on you, don’t you, Harrison Gray.
Harrison: They said abilities were forbidden. I’m just reading what you’re feeling.
Nica: You’re the only one who’ll ever know if you’re using your ability or not. I’d expect nothing less of the one Cursed by the Lying Fox.
Harrison: Thanks, I guess.
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Nica: ——Anyway, what are we going to do from now on?
Alfons: Whatever could you mean?
Nica: I mean, seeing as we all revealed our hands, I can’t imagine this will end nice and smooth.
N: For the record, I’m fine with taking each other down. Since I don’t hold back against bastards and all.
Jude: Ha, I like the sound o’ that. The last one standin’ wins. Simple, clear-cut, n’ easy to understand.
Alfons: Though I can’t say I enjoy such brutish things, I suppose sacrifices may be inevitable.
Harrison: Hey you guys——
Woman’s cry: Ahh!
Harrison: That voice…
Woman’s cry: Someone! There’s a groper— he groped me!
Nica: A groper, huh.
N: Yeah, I figured. There’s bound to be some stupid humans who can’t hold themselves back and take advantage of the festival.
N: I just don’t get it. Well, I’m sure with this crowd, he’ll get caught in no time.
Alfons: I’m sure a man foolish enough to grope others will be caught soon——
A: But as I recall, the direction that man is running happens to be toward the place Kate has come to cheer for us, isn’t it?
Harrison: …I’ll go. I’m worried about her.
H: You guys can do whatever.
Jude: Tch, can’t stand the thought o’ leaving ‘er alone and gettin’ yelled at.
Alfons: Ahha! Are the men who haven’t run that much before going full speed ahead now?
A: What are you going to do, Nica?
Nica: Guess I’ll go too? Standing idle around won’t do much anyway.
[ALLEYWAY]
Groper: Dammit… why are you guys chasing after me! Ah——
Harrison: Okay, caught you.
Jude: Keep that trash bastard o’ a pervert restrained.
Harrison: That was my intention.
H: Ahh, you guys came too?
Nica: Ohh, so this is the groper, huh. Haha, now that’s a face that’ll probably stir up trouble with women.
Alfons: Judging by one’s outward appearance is nonsense. That said, though, he does sport a rather unfulfilled expression.
Groper: I didn’t do it! My hand just happened to touch her butt.
Groper: And besides! Aren’t you guys the one who’s got some unfulfilled desires, stirring up all this fuss all over this?
Alfons: Oh, you happened to, didn’t you.
A: On the way here, I caught onto something, you see.
A: As far as I heard, six women were bringing up how they were getting touched by you.
A: Why that is one hefty coincidence indeed, dare I say.
A: Or could it be your hands were implanted with a magnet that drew you to women’s rears?
Nica: And besides, we’ve got a handy lie detector right here.
N: So? Which is it?
Harrison: Everything you’re saying is a lie. There’s no doubt about that.
H: Well, that’s my intuition, at least.
Groper: …gh.
Groper: D-damn it all! Yeah, okay, I did it!
Nica: Okay, okay, I’ve heard just about enough of that bastard’s dirty voice.
Alfons: Now then, having confessed so honestly, what punishment shall we do?
A: Ahh, come to think of it, our abilities are off the table, aren’t they. Well then, Jude.
Jude: Show that nasty arse o’ yours. The one ya fondled with.
Groper: Guah!
Nica: Wow, that sounded brutal. His bones are probably broken.
Alfons: My heartfelt condolences. Well, what should we do with this knocked out man?
Harrison: Hand him over to the police.
H: Today we’re not Crown and Vogel, but rather just participants.
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Jude: Whatever floats your boat. I couldn’t care less.
An unclear cry: Ahh!
Harrison: Another one…? (O_O)
Alfons: What is it this time?
[BRIDGE]
Kate: Ah— guys!
K: There’s a big problem, all the participants who had the drinks from the break spot ended up falling fast asleep!
Alfons: Is that so?
Kate: And then a committee member started to reveal that they’d been threatened and bribed and——
Jude: Hmm.
Kate: And on top of that, it was discovered that someone was going to use the sewer as an unjust move!
Nica: Well, I’ll be.
Kate: Just who could be behind these? It’s too much like what a trash bastard would do, and I can’t look past that!
Harrison: Go on, Kate, keep it going.
Kate: Wha——?
Fin.
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team 1 team 2 team 3
ko-fi ☕️ ┊ comms 🤍
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iminaworldofpureimagination · 5 months ago
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i dont hate anyone in the show but i def noticed a lot of character I love can commit murders and harm people. and thats fine cause they're from zaun silco/jinx/cult viktor jesus and his insane evoloation plans.. def killed people? I think either way its funny how that is outright ignored.
its def a blah take to have for Caitlyn calling her a facist when caitlyn a queer asian woman would be the very person nazis hate it doesnt make sense. its also screwy her critics weirdly insit she's white.. when she's not.. can't help but feel there might be some..anti asian bias as its been rampant since the 2020s..
Everytime I see someone say "i can't ship caitvi, caitlyn's a fascist"
I know yall don't know what fascist means, just heard one person say it and now yall won't stop parroting it like a bunch of brainless fools.
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haartemis · 6 months ago
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CROSS THE LINE | Jude Bellingham
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pairing: jude bellingham x fem!reader, unnamed fictional RM player x fem!reader
word count: 3.1k
summary: after a fallout with your boyfriend, you find solace in a spontaneous night at the movies, where you run into his golden boy teammate. one thing leads to another and you cross the line.
A/N: first judith fic!! this was really fun to write. (very loosely) based on guilty as sin by taylor swift. let me know what yall think <3
warnings: infidelity (i don't condone it yall its just fun to write morally gray characters 🫣)
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someone once told you there’s no such thing as bad thoughts – that it’s your actions that truly define you.
you wonder what they’d say if they saw you now: sitting up in bed with your boyfriend sound asleep beside you, staring at your phone with a pounding heart, silently hoping, waiting, for a message from someone else.
you wait and wait, but there’s nothing. your home screen stays empty, mocking you. you glance at your boyfriend. his shallow breathing fills the quiet room, steady and oblivious.
he has no idea you came home at 3 a.m. wearing his teammate’s jacket.
you'd stuffed it in the back of your closet as soon as you got home, a relic of a night that shouldn’t have happened. you'd scrubbed yourself thoroughly in the shower, trying to wash away the smell of jude’s cologne that clung to your skin. but it’s still there. not on your skin anymore, but in your mind, stamped into your memory to stay forever. 
the way the flickering lights from the movie theater screen cast shadows on his beautiful face, the fleeting feeling of his warm hands on yours as he handed you his jacket, the full body rumble of his laugh, the feel of his soft lips on yours.
you will never forget. how could you, when that was the first time in months you’d felt seen? desired. wanted. needed. it’s an intoxicating feeling, like stepping into the sunlight after living in the shadows for the longest time.
and now, staring at your phone, you feel it all over again. the pull. the wrongness of it all.
a buzz breaks the silence. your heart jumps into your throat as the screen lights up and a single message appears.
jude: you got home safe?
it’s innocent enough. simple. harmless.
you could ignore it. pretend you didn’t see it. block his number and put an end to whatever this is before it spirals into something else.
but instead, your fingers move on their own accord.
you: yeah. thanks for checking.
you press send before you can stop yourself. you lock your phone and put it on the bedside table before closing your eyes and willing yourself to go to sleep.
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to your credit, none of this was planned. it all starts earlier that night. you and your boyfriend are supposed to have a date night, a rare opportunity to spend some alone time together. you pick out a dress he once says is his favorite and make a dinner reservation at his favorite spot.
but plans change quickly.
“babe, the guys just texted,” he says, barely looking up from his phone. “they’re hopping on fifa in a bit. you don’t mind if we raincheck, right?”
you stare at him dumbfounded as he flops down onto the couch.
“raincheck?” your voice trembles, the tears obvious, yet he doesn’t even glance at you.
“yeah. just tonight, we’ll do something soon,” he says dismissively.
it’s not the first time he’s blown you off, but tonight it stings a little more. maybe it’s the fact that he’s so indifferent to you and your feelings, he doesn’t even care to notice the relationship is teetering on the edge of a cliff. he doesn’t realize that you’re making an effort to save it while he’s unknowingly contributing to its unraveling.
you realized it too late, but you know now you’re not a partner to him, not really. you’re a glorified accessory, someone he can show off for external validation, a dependable constant in his life that’s only there to cheer him on and make him look good while he gives his attention and energy to the things he actually cares about: his friends, his family, and above all, his football.
it wasn’t like this in the beginning, but things changed quickly after he made the move to real madrid and became a bigger star. with every goal, every headline, and every paparazzi photo, you sank further into the background of his life.
you linger for a moment, waiting for him to change his mind, to look up and realize what he’s doing. but he doesn’t. so you grab your bag and leave without saying another word.
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the cinema isn’t your first choice. you wander the streets for a while, debating whether to call a friend or just head home. but you need a distraction, something that can dispel all the thoughts running through your head. so before you know it, you’re buying a single ticket to whatever is playing next.
the theater is almost empty. it isn’t until you sit down and glance at your ticket that you realize you’re not seeing something new, but a re-release of a classic: Goodfellas.
halfway through the movie, you see a figure slip into a seat a few rows ahead of you. a few moments pass, and you feel a pair of eyes boring into the back of your head. it’s distracting, like an itch. you can't bear to ignore it any longer so you turn your head and look straight at the person. the figure quickly shifts his gaze, pretending to be engrossed in the screen. his features are hidden thanks to the hoodie he’s wearing, but his height and broad shoulders give him away as a man.
you hold your gaze for a second longer, just to make sure he gets the message, before turning back to the screen. but your focus is broken after that.
a few more moments pass and you notice the man stand and make his way out of his row. you let out a quiet breath of relief, assuming he’s leaving. but from the corner of your eye, you see the same figure moving toward your seat. your body stiffens immediately. why is he coming your way? maybe it was a bad idea to come to a nearly empty theater alone so late at night.
you watch as he stops in front of you and slightly crouches to not block the view of the screen.
“y/n?” he asks, voice low yet familiar.
“uh, yeah?” you respond warily.
“thought it was you.” he pulls back his hood, revealing the grinning face of jude bellingham.
a wave of embarrassment immediately washes over you. it’s bad enough that your boyfriend doesn’t love you and prefers to spend time playing video games with his friends, but now you have to run into his teammate of all people while you’re publicly wallowing in your misery—his kind, handsome teammate who always makes you flush whenever you cross paths.
this time is no different. your face grows warm as you stutter, “oh! h-hi, jude.”
you brace for the questions: why are you here alone? where’s your boyfriend? why do you have tear stains on your cheeks?
they don’t come though. instead, he gestures to the seat next to you. “mind if i join you? my seat over there was right under the AC; i was freezing.”
you nod. jude flashes you a smile as he takes a seat.
and then nothing. you watch the rest of the movie silently, the only interaction between you being an elbow nudge from him to offer his pack of candy.
he’s completely engrossed. he laughs silently at certain scenes, and in the more intense ones lets out small gasps. for someone else, it might’ve been annoying, but for you, who’s used to your boyfriend’s indifference to everything, you find his enthusiasm refreshing, maybe even a little endearing.
you spend the rest of the movie mentally going through the list of things you know about him : he's the same age as you (your boyfriend begrudgingly posted a birthday wish on his instagram story once), he can't drive (you see him being picked up by a driver whenever you visit valdebebas), he's genuinely nice (he always says hi when he sees you around, and he's politely held a door open for you once or twice), his spanish isn't the best (you once ran into him hopelessly trying to change his order at the canteen, sheepishly apologizing to the annoyed barista before you helped him out), and your boyfriend quietly holds a dislike for him because he's 'attention seeking' ( you secretly think its not his fault that he's charming and easygoing, that he has everyone he meets wrapped around his finger).
when the movie ends and the lights begin to brighten, he turns to you.
"do you wanna get ice cream?"
you hesitate for a moment.
"yeah. i’d love to," you say finally.
you exit the cinema, and when the fresh outdoor air hits you, you ask the question at the tip of your tongue.
"why and how are you here?"
"could ask the same for you," he grins.
"yeah, but—" you begin, but are immediately silenced by the sight in front of you. jude reaches into the pocket of the jacket he's layered over his hoodie and pulls out a dreadlocked toupee. with the straightest face, he carefully pulls down his hood, places the wig on his head, and adjusts it before pulling the hood back up.
you blink.
"you were saying?" the corners of his mouth twitch at your facial expression. without waiting for a reply, he starts walking, leading you away from the cinema.
you walk in tandem, still giving him a confused look. when you catch sight of his (fake) locs swinging along to the rhythm of his steps, you can’t help it; you burst out laughing.
“what’s so funny?” he turns to you, a mock hurt look on his face. “i’m part jamaican, you know.”
you pause your walking, doubling over and clutching your stomach as you laugh. he stands patiently, looking slightly amused.
after you catch your breath and fully recover, you continue walking.
“so that’s how you go places unnoticed?” you ask, still giggling.
“yup,” he says. “otherwise it’s a nightmare. need a bodyguard and stuff.”
you nod sympathetically as you stroll down the quiet street, the soft glow of streetlights casting long shadows on the concrete. jude walks with an easy confidence, his hands in his pockets while you glance over at him and his toupee every so often.
“so,” he says after a moment, glancing sideways at you, “what’s your excuse? why are you at a late night showing of Goodfellas all by yourself?”
your smile falters slightly. you look straight ahead, debating how much to share.
“just needed to get out of the house,” you say with a light tone.
jude doesn’t push, though the way he hums softly in response tells you he notices your answer is only a half-truth.
"what about you?" you ask.
"I like watching movies," he says simply.
when you give him a somewhat confused look, he pulls out his phone and opens the letterboxd app, showing you the extensive list of movies he's marked as watched. you skim through it and you’re surprised by the diversity. the list is seemingly filled with movies of all genres, from classic films to indie flicks. you didn’t expect this side of him, but somehow it makes sense.
as he enthusiastically explains the list, you can't help but feel endeared by the excited look on his face. you have the overwhelming urge to reach out and smooth over his furrowed brow with your finger. but for the first and only time that night, you don't act on that impulse.
you reach a small gelato stand located on a corner of the street, its neon sign glowing softly. jude steps forward and leans against the counter.
“pick whatever you want,” he says, winking as he passes you the menu.
“don’t mind if i do,” you say, raising an eyebrow. you ignore the way his words make you feel—warm and fluttery, like this is a first date between two single people.
after a moment of deliberation, you pick pistachio and hazelnut, watching as jude leans in to order the same for himself.
“you copying me?”
“nah,” he says with a smirk, passing your cone to you from the server. “just figured you have good taste.”
you wander away from the stand, both of you savoring your ice cream. for a while, you walk in comfortable silence. at one point, he removes the ridiculous wig from his head. it isn’t until you reach a park bench that jude breaks the silence.
"you know," he starts. "i haven’t seen you at a lot of games lately. everything good between you and your boyfriend?"
“‘your boyfriend?’” you tease. “why not call him by his name? you guys have beef or something?”
he stays silent.
you gasp half-jokingly. “oh my god! tell me everything, so i can sell the story to the tabloids.”
he lets out a laugh at that.
“you’re ridiculous,” he says, shaking his head, but there’s a glint of amusement in his eyes.
“c’mon, spill,” you tease, nudging his arm lightly. “is he, like, selfish? does he refuse to pass during games?”
jude chuckles, shaking his head again. “nah, nothing like that. he’s a good player. talented, hardworking… you just start noticing things when you’re around someone all the time, you know?”
he says it carefully, almost hesitantly. you tilt your head at him. “notice things like what?”
he shrugs, his gaze dropping to his melting cone. “like… maybe he doesn’t appreciate what he’s got.”
the words hang in the air between you. you don't know how to respond, so you just gaze down at your own ice cream.
"sorry," jude says quickly. "didn't mean to overstep. i just—forget it."
"no, it's fine," you say quietly. "you're not wrong."
you sit in silence for a few moments. you feel him lean back against the bench, and the next time he speaks, his tone is lighter.
"my dad's coming to visit tomorrow," he says casually, an excited undertone in his voice.
"yeah? that's nice. does he come often?"
"not as much as i'd like," jude admits. "he's got my little brother to worry about in sunderland."
you smile softly. “what do you guys usually do when he visits?”
"usually we grab some food..."
he speaks about his bond with his dad, and also his close relationship with both his brother and mother. soon the conversation moves to childhood memories; jude tells you stories about growing up in birmingham, the football academy there, how he met his best friends at school. in return, you share stories of your own childhood, each one met with genuine curiosity from jude. you laugh, the conversation feeling effortlessly easy and natural.
it isn’t until you pull out your phone and glance at the screen to check the time that reality crashes back in. you have a boyfriend waiting for you at home. a boyfriend who hasn’t called, hasn’t texted, hasn’t even noticed that you’ve walked out of his house.
you lick the last remnants of your ice cream and are just about to crunch into the cone when jude gestures toward your chin. “you’ve got a little…” he says, trailing off as he points.
“oh,” you mumble while jude scans your surroundings for a tissue. finding none, he leans in and gently swipes at the bit of ice cream with his thumb.
“got it,” he murmurs, his touch lingering just a second longer than required.
what happens next can only be described as a a lapse in thinking, or maybe something you've been holding back all night. before your brain can catch up with your actions, you grab his hand and bring his thumb to your lips. you lick the ice cream away, your eyes flicking up to meet his.
jude freezes, his breath catching, his deep brown eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that makes your heart race.
"i—" you start, but whatever explanation you're about to give disappears when jude leans closer, his hand hovering near your face, as if waiting for your permission.
you don’t pull away. you don’t want to.
his lips brush against yours, hesitant at first, testing the waters. when you don’t push him away or move back, when, instead, you lean into him, his kiss deepens. it’s slow and deliberate, like he has all the time in the world to memorize every inch of you.
the ice cream cone in your hand is forgotten, melting onto the pavement as your fingers tangle into his hoodie, pulling him closer. the world fades, leaving just the two of you in your little bubble.
when you finally pull apart, your breaths mingle in the night air and jude’s forehead rests against yours.
“jude…” you whisper, but you don’t know how to finish the sentence.
he pulls back just enough to look at you, his expression serious. “tell me if I’ve crossed a line. i don’t want to make things harder for you.”
your heart flutters at the genuine care in his tone. you shake your head. “no, you didn’t.”
he doesn't keep his lips off you after that.
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the next morning, you wake up feeling better than you have in months. there's a lightness in your chest, a warmth that’s been missing for what feels like forever.
you glance at your boyfriend, expecting to feel guilt or remorse. but there’s nothing. no pang of regret, no twist in your stomach. you feel... nothing at all.
you watch him roll out of bed and get ready for training. not a word passes between you as you sit down together in the kitchen to eat breakfast.
“so, what does your day look like today?” you try.
he doesn’t even look up, his attention entirely on his phone, scrolling with one hand while holding his fork with the other.
“i have a meeting at work that’s pretty—“ you start, but he cuts off.
“we’re doing penalty drills,” he mutters without looking up. “need to score more than bellingham so i can wipe that smug smile off his face. did you know he gets paid more than me?”
you just stare at him. you wonder what you even saw in him all those years ago. how had you overlooked the bitterness in his eyes, the envy? how had you missed it all along, his resentment towards anyone who seemed happier, luckier, more successful? his good looking face looks distorted to you now, forever changed to you to reflect the ugliness he holds inside. its as if you’re seeing him for who he really is for the very first time.
your phone buzzes on the table. without even checking, you know who it’s from.
jude: good morning :) sleep well?
you see it for what it is: an invitation to step into dangerous territory, to cross the line once more. a lifeline offering escape from the sinking ship that is your relationship.
you decide to take it.
you type a quick response and set the phone down. your boyfriend is grinning at an instagram reel now, completely absorbed.
you don’t speak to each other for the remainder of breakfast. this time it doesn't bother you at all.
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writers-potion · 1 year ago
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MASTERPOST (PT. 1)
Daily Writerly Updates! | Open to post requests & questions My Writing Tea & Tips Community: @@writing-tea-tips
+ Feel free to chat with me anytime :) Think of me as your next door writer neighbor 🏡
If you like my blog, buy me a coffee☕ and find me on instagram! 📸
For worldbuilding, vocab lists, weapons &fighting, and more: MASTERPOST PART 2>>
❤️ Romance Writing Prompts
Meet-Cute Ideas
Reponses to: "How Could You?"
Responses to: "Break my heart." 💔
How would you develop a relationship that’s been constantly one-sided?
Enemies-to-Lovers Dialogue Prompts
List of Relationship Tropes <3
Library Romance Prompts
Arranged Marriage Prompts
Responses to: "I love you"
Soulmates AU Prompts
"I love you but I don't" Prompts
Romance Novel Tropes & Subgenres: a comprehensive list
The Romantic Academic
Forbidden Love Dialogue Prompts
Angry Love Confessions
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☕📜Writing Scenes
Scenes: The Basics🏕️
Structuring Your Fight Scene
Writing Funny (But Intense) Action Scenes
Ideas for Flashback Scenes
Writing The Perfect Kiss Scene
Fantasy Battle Scenes 101
---
✧𑁍.ೃPlot Tips & Tropes
A Very Brief Outline of the Three-Act Structure
Plot Type 1: "The Quest"
Writing Text Conversations - follower question
Fairy Murder Method Ideas 
Gossiping Scene Idea Prompts
Child Eating Fairies Ideas + The Mysterious Cave Trope - follower question
Writing Political Intrigue
Comforting a Fire Girl Scene - follower question
Energize a Sluggy Middle
2 Types of Deaths in Fiction
Literary vs. Commercial Plots
Fantasy Tropes that I Love
Writing the Perfect Betrayal 
Writing Strong Opening Lines
Plotting Tips for Romantasy
Dark Fantasy Tropes List
Dark Academic Plot Must-Haves 
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✩₊˚.⋆☾ POV Related
1st vs. 3rd POV For Mad Characters
Emotionless Character POV
🧛🏻‍♀️Character Writing Tips
Redeeming The Bad Boy Character
How to Write Redemption Arcs 
Writing Diverse Characters - Things to Remember
Character Nickname Ideas
How to Write Liars Believably
Choosing the Right Character
Organizing Character Relationships
Writing 1st POV Character Fears 
Introducing Non-binary Characters
Teasing Sibling Dialogue Prompts
Writing A Drug Addict Character
No Redemption Villains
Emotions and humanity for the Non-Human Character - follower question
Writing Gangsters
Characterization: Unforgettable Characters
Human Feelings for the Non-Human Character
The Character Arc: 101
Emotional Mini BIO
Writing Autistic Characters
On Writing Blind Characters
Writing Homosexual Characters 
Establishing the MC-Reader Bond
Writing Child Characters Believably 
Toxic Parent Prompts
Writing Morally Gray Characters 
Writing the "Mean Girl" Character
Writing Introverted Characters
Strong Female Characters 
Fantastical Asian Monsters (Part I)
🕐List of Dirty Character Traits
Dark Backstory Ideas
Good Characer Traits to bad
A List of Toxic Traits for Your Character 
Character Names with Unfortunate Meanings
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MASTERPOST PART 2>>
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