#mmmm what a man

[claudethecrabdemoness]

Ok so I think I found a way to fix Vox LOLLOLOL. 

And by fix him, I mean make him much, much worse.

🔌 📺😝🎩⚡️

So I was drabbling in my head w Claude and Vox and they got to deep talking about their previous lives and regrets and all sorts of existential meanderings, when Vox surprised me by saying “I was a Christian, ya know. A good one. Never even missed a Sunday- come late night or hangover or hellwater. *chuckle* Fat lot of good it did me, right?”

And then I was like oh. OHHHH. 

He should’ve been a televangelist. 

So now this is canon as far as I’m concerned, and can even make perfect use of the little priest getup from his song number. After all, that is essentially what he’s doing with the V’s: amassing a hell-wide cult through the power of his broadcast monopoly. And explains why Claude had never heard of him before- he’s not your average kind of celebrity. 

I picture he got his start on local access TV, in the early 40s, just right after Al would’ve had his heyday with radio. He was an East Coast boy, no doubt, and mastered the quick-talking pander of the telecasters at the time. He often ran small broadcasts for local churches- fundraisers, telethons, what have you- and the Christian community ate up his All-American boyish charm. Especially the ladies. He married one who went to his church and really believed his words had the power to change lives, urged him to start his own televised worship, and boy did he thrive. They quickly became a household name, and he basically kick-started the whole televangelist movement into high gear. Like the bastard he is. Soon he gained a country-wide following and had money pouring in from the faithful by the buckets, and of course it all went straight to his head. Hence why it’s a TV now as punishment. That’s when he began exploiting his pulpit, believing himself a prophet, staying with his wife only to maintain their image, buying houses and toys and cars all with parishioner’s money, staying awake for days on cocaine and coming back down with barbiturates, the whole nine yards. 

It eventually caught up to him when his followers tried to commit a mass murder/suicide in his name, and a lengthy court appeal didn’t really smooth over their new reputation as a dangerous cult. Which is so unfair. It wasn’t like he told them to go all Old Testament, buuut… it’s not like his message was that far off from it either. Idiots. From then on, he started overworking, overthinking, and overdoing the whole thing right into the ground. His wife left him, he lost a ton of money in legal fees, and he had to hire protection now to keep up with the death threats from angry loved ones of his devotees. All the stress and resentment drove him into religious fanaticism, and his sermons just got more and more ego-driven and manic, asking for larger tithes and claiming it would be help him work the Lord’s magic even faster. He eventually was killed by a hit put out on him by an up and coming newer cult- ironically a spinoff of his original one- proving that he was very much mortal, but his faithful followers still believed he was a messiah of some kind. 

And that’s because- in his haze of drugs and self-destruction- he believed he was one too. He was sure that what he was doing was for all the Right Reasons, even if the methods were unorthodox. But hey- even Jesus flipped tables and rebelled against the Romans, so who’s to say his path is any less holy? He was SURE that he’d still be getting a ticket to Heaven, despite some minor setbacks…

So you can imagine his rage when he very much woke up in Hell. 

All his hard work, all his devotion, all his MONEY- for what?? Damned to live with a TV instead of his beautiful face and nothing to show for his decades of faith??

What the fUCK??

It was then that he realized God was the biggest scam of all and immediately renounced his faith, spending the first few years of demonhood sinning and drinking as much as possible. He had no idea how to cope with it all, and saw no point to trying, really. What good is having a TV head when you can barely stand the thought of using it- just a constant reminder of the empire you left crumbing behind you. 

And that’s when he met Alastor. 

Now here was someone else cursed by his favorite medium and a deer form that boasted anything but the predator he saw himself as- only this man was anything but deterred by it. The Radio Demon’s broadcasts may have terrorized everyone else in Hell, but they invigorated something deep inside Vox. Something he hasn’t felt since his first televised sermon… something like worship. 

He had to seek him out. 

This then ties in perfectly with his one-sided crush/obsession with Al, their doomed stint at friendship, and the impending rejection he receives at the end. AGAIN. First God, now Alastor…? You’d think that second blow would reduce him into an even greater depression than before, but instead, it flips a switch inside him. That’s when Vox decides ENOUGH. He’s done pandering, he’s done negotiating, he’s done elevating anyone else above himself. And why should he?? If anything HE should be the one on that pedestal, HE should be the only one to get credit for all HIS deeds…

HE should be God. 

And dammit, if he can’t join the original up in Heaven, why not try to become one down in Hell?

The rest is canon as we know it, but I just really realllllly love the idea of ex-Christian Vox, and all the disillusionment religious trauma can bring. He went straight from communion to capitalism, and I like that in my hell-bound guys. I will def be using this as his canon backstory for my AU with Claude, bc I needed to bring even more conflicted suffering and RSD to this character before I can truly ship them together hahaa. 

And…. despite what his real backstory actually is…. this is the only one I subscribe to now. 😈

ALSO:

TELL ME THIS ISN’T HIM!!??!??? HELP. CREEPY HANDSOME IS THE ONLY WAY TO GO FOR THIS CURSED TV MAN I HAVE DECLARED IT SO PLS ADJUST YOUR FANART ACCORDINGLY. 

Anyway, thanks for coming to my TED talk I’m going to go rot in my hole now thinking of more hcs for this akskshagaga-

[vomitspit2]

concept with jade leech

there is no dire-beast inside the mirror chamber, and there are no ghosts inhabiting ramshackle. it is simply: you, alone in a rundown building, after the headmaster leaves.

you have been pinching yourself through the day. little crescent marks litter your wrist.

for the past six or so hours, you have been trying really hard to wake up from this dream. nothing is working. desolate, you take to wandering the house.

you know your imagination is strong but an entire college, idiosyncratic characters, and an entire furnished building is a bit complex. still, you card through the squabble, hoping to unearth some mistake in physics that will tell you that this is a dream. that search ends abruptly when you find a loose floorboard and the fragile wood underneath you gives out like a snapped cracker.

you land hard.

ten feet down in the basement, lying on your back.

blinking away dust, your eyes land upon the piece of wood speared cleanly through your abdomen.

the pain tells you this is too much to be a dream.

it is a full two hours you lie there immobile. you try rolling on your side, hoping to at least stand up, but each motion is anguish in an ineffable amount. you wrap your hands around the red wood and try to pull; it leads to your eyeballs rolling so far back you see new colors. skin shining with generous sweat and dipping in and out of consciousness, you lie there and bid limited time until someone from this new world comes to find you. the headmaster will eventually come back, right?

you think about a multitude of things.

you think about how if your corpse withers here, the puss running out your orifices will look like cream cheese.

you think about how the glittering wands those students held might work, is it like harry potter or a unique universe.

you think about how you still had to go to work tomorrow in your own original universe, attend classes, hope plans with friends don’t fall through so you laugh carefree without lungfuls of blood.

your last slip from consciousness to eternal unconsciousness, you think about home. the bed you slept in, the books read and films watched, the snack wrappers on the sheets, what a comforting waste.

you drift off, expecting to be jolted awake again by your own feverish mind, and die, bleeding out on ramshackle’s basement floor.

it takes azul awhile to gain ramshackle’s dorm.

the one new student he saw during the opening ceremony apparently stayed there one night and fled the next morning. as the headmaster’s report goes, crowley found no one living there when he went to check the following day. however, the usage of ramshackle by that magicless student opened up a gate of opportunity and azul did not let it go to waste.

the negotiations took awhile and the proper refurbishment will have to be done. but just before winter exams, azul has managed to secure himself a second location for mostro lounge.

first, damages have to be assessed.

the building is disgusting, rundown, and simply inhabitable. busy with the 250 students he has under contract, azul assigns jade to spend a november afternoon there and make note of what they need to start repairing first.

azul really hopes the plumbing is salvageable. the cost would be through the roof if otherwise.

so jade, hand over his heart, promises to survey ramshackle the next day and outline a list of high priority repairs to stuff they can skimp upon in the budget.

jade’s excited. the mountains he treks are northwest and ramshackle is northeast; this will provide him a new opportunity to see what kind of mushroom may lie on that side of the island. …oh, and he supposes he will also assist azul in his endeavor as well.

the next day, he spends half of the allotted time foraging outside of ramshackle before he actually walks into the building. i should make this quick and efficient. i only have thirty minutes left. notepad in hand, he starts to investigate the wreckage.

uninhabited and ugly. those are the two words that rise to jade’s mind first. truly, it is a lovely space and it would be a disgrace to see it painted in shades of lilac and oceanic decor. but, it will be entertaining nonetheless to see azul’s business expand.

yet, as he’s walking down the halls, jade cannot help but think he is hearing a second pair of footsteps just behind him.

yes, ramshackle is ugly but it does not seem to be as uninhabited as he thought. how intriguing.

so, sadistic grin blooming, jade decides to play a game. he will ignore this secondary person and continue on, waiting anxiously to see what will happen. he marks down his observations, all while feeling a pair of eyes upon his neck. lighting on the first floor needs fixing. the water runs orange in the upstairs sink. nothing entirely formidable has happen yet, but he hopes it will.

jade cannot wait to see if this ghost can turn his skin inside out, or perhaps drop a floorboard on top of his head, the possibilities are endless. it all has jade’s toes squirming in his dress shoes in anticipation.

however, his thirty minutes are up before he can descend the basement stairs and nothing has happened yet.

which is disappointing.

he’ll be back again tomorrow so there is always a chance for something then.

however, he had hoped for something to happen now.

just as jade is walking out the door, list and bag of mushrooms in hand, something ice cold tickles the hairs on his neck. frigid like home. he barely gets a chance to dwell on it before five frozen fingers wrap themselves around his throat and shove him down the porch steps.

the door to ramshackle slams shut.

sprawled on the ground, jade reaches his hand up to the idents on the column of skin, the previous touch thawing out.

he cannot help the deep blush that comes up to his face.

with a deep breath, his own gloves fingers still hovering over the lost embrace, jade stands up and pats himself down. he looks upon the closed door with a hunger in his eyes.

yes, tomorrow he will be back.

and he hopes this ghost will act up again because they have so much more allure to jade than a second mostro lounge.

[hauntingjasper]

Sketchy sketch of an Angler design I had in mind, i saw ppl making their own humanized designs for the Pressure entities so i'm giving it a shot too

*The Sailor Song by Toy Box starts playing*

[moeblob]

They're soulmates in every single universe and I miss them at the most random times.

[coridallasmultipass]

Bros only. You're not invited.

[ratatatastic]

"what was it like to see ekky drop the gloves and see him just jump in there for you?" [proceeds to say you know and yeah like a lifeline until he can gather his thoughts properly.] "its just cool hes a good guy"

"i appreciate that but you know... yeah i would do the same thing to him"

post practise interview | 11.18.24 (x)

[theboarsbride]

toying with the idea of a lobster-themed siren character?????? ☝🤨🤔hmmm......

[stabbyfoxandrew]

also hi. me and jess ended up binge watching iwtv s2 yesterday.

[honkygay]

yeahhhh thats it Carlos MAKE THAT 6’0 MAN NERVOUS CUZ U GOT TWO INCHES ON HIM!!! NO ONES EVER HAD A HEIGHT ADVANTAGE ON HIM BEFORE!!! MAKE HIM SWEAT!!!

[queenofthursday6599-blog]

You know, when I think about Arcane I can't help but think about the fact that I'm not a huge fan of how Vander handled things.

I mean his heart was definitely in the right place, he wanted to protect his children and his people, but to be honest there were moments where I felt like he was very confidently doing the wrong thing.

Specially in a child rearing sense. Now I just want to put it out there, that we the audience are shown a biased depiction of Vander.

Just about every scene he's in he's surrounded by his people who (mostly) look to him for protection, his children who adore him, or his enemies who are literal drug lord gang leader bad guys and corrupt policemen. Who are not humanized by the story until after his death.

For one there's Vi's pretty obvious eldest daughter syndrome, which Vander does nothing to try and curb. In fact I feel like in most of their scenes together Vander is treating this unhealthy dynamic as Vi being her sibling's leader and that she therefor needs to take more responsibility for them.

Even though I feel like Vander teaching Vi that way of thinking caused a lot of problems for all of the kids.

Sure it's great when your kids can work together, but there shouldn't be a pecking order among them, and if there is you shouldn't encourage it.

Vander fully expects Vi to take responsibility for Powder(which makes some level of sense considering she's 4-ish years younger than Vi), but also Mylo and Claggor, who are both the same age as her.

Meaning that if Vander trusts Vi to look after herself (and Powder) I feel like he should be able to trust Mylo and Claggor to look after themselves.

Vi should not be saddled with the responsibility of being in charge of her siblings, who are literally the same age as her.

If Vander is going to be reprimanding Vi for getting into trouble, he should be getting on to Mylo and Claggor just as much.

Sure Mylo and Claggor mention that Vander is going to be upset, but it's very obvious that the majority of the responsibility rests on Vi's shoulders.

Which, sure they look up to Vi and listen to what she has to say and what she thinks they should be doing.

But if it's to the point where Vander thinks it's gotten to the point that they will literally blindly follow Vi into dangerous situations because she said so. Then I feel like it's time for Vander to have a sit down with the rest of his kids and have the very important "Thinking for yourself" talk.

It's- You can't raise your children to just blindly follow their oldest sibling their entire life, and raise the oldest child to be the caretaker of the rest of their siblings their entire life.

Yeah, Vi needs to think things through a bit more, because the other kids look up to her a lot, and will go along with whatever her plans are, because they think she knows what she's doing and they trust her.

But also the other kids need to know how to assess things for themselves, rather than just blindly follow whatever it is Vi says, no matter how much they look up to her.

Like this man fully thinks that his 15 year old daughter, who clearly has problems with her temper and being impulsive herself, should also be responsible for her two adoptive brothers who are functionally the same age as her [one with a pretty obvious superiority/inferiority complex], alongside her younger sister who already has problems of some kind of anxiety.

Mylo and Claggor are just fully not held to the same standard as Vi in spite of being the same age, and literally getting into the exact same trouble. Their choice to go along with what Vi planned, is put onto Vi's shoulders when it shouldn't be, because if Vi is old enough to know better in Vander's mind, so are Mylo and Claggor.

If it was just Powder I could somewhat understand. She's younger, more impressionable, she idolizes Vi, she's not as strong or fast as the other three and if Vi forgot that at some point Powder could have gotten left behind or hurt.

You know the general "You need to be a good role model for your younger sibling because they look to you for guidance" stuff.

Like the fact that Vi feels the need to fight Piltover in order to secure a better life for Powder in Act 1 tells me so much just how parentified Vi is when it comes to Powder's care.

Which I do think originated from before Vander adopted the girls, to be fair to Vander. Vi gives off the vibe of looking after Powder having always been her responsibility.

To be unfair to Vander, I don't think he did anything to try and undo Vi's over responsible and over protective mindset when it came to Powder after adopting them.

[harcove]

This one has to be on YouTube considering it's too big for Tumblr, but here's the conversation you have with Halsin before your night together :)

[coconut530]

GO FRENCHIE GO!!!!

[the-kipsabian]

wdym theres only 15 zack/chris fics on ao3

[faineant-girl]

*going thru a page i know will piss me off* man that pisses me off

[ratatatastic]

sobbing into my hands about forsy being asked about paul praising him after game 2 of the global series 😭😭 the little quirk of his lips at "norris trophy" and "the best defender in the world" to which he just cant keep a straight face and has to laugh joyously before he has to act humble about it 😭😭😭

[cyclorose]

I LOVE the idea of oliver being a werewolf, but my heart will always go to vampire oli (it's much superior imo but for self ship reasons he's a werewolf. I really like the vampire x werewolf trope lol)