#missed this incredible hater moment last time as well

[msburgundy]

[infizero]

ok guys i dont wanna be a hater but im gonna be 100% honest i didnt rlly like the nimona movie 😭 I MEAN IT WAS FUN. it was nice. but i feel like it was missing everything that made me like the original graphic novel and honestly by the last like 30 minutes i was kind of just waiting for it to be over so i could read the book again 😭 NO HATE TO ANYONE WHO RLLY LIKED IT believe me when i say i dont think it is bad or anything. but i feel like just sooooo much was changed that it didnt feel like nimona at all to me. idk how to explain it, im sure once i reread the book i’ll be able to put it into words since the original will be more fresh in my mind. i think it was good but as someone who was literally obsessed w the og graphic novel it was honestly kinda disappointing. but i dont rlly care honestly its still rlly cool it got a movie!! 

but in my mind at least it proves that some things dont need to be made into a movie. ppl act like movies are the best form a piece of media can take and if something gets made into a movie then that’d be the peak form of it. but i honestly think nimona works wayyyyyy better in its original graphic novel form. most of the early stuff is way more slice of life lowkey stuff that lets you get attached to ballister and nimona as characters and get invested in their relationship w each other, BEFORE all the angsty final act stuff happens. also there honestly was just a ton of stuff that felt to me like it worked better in the original, like jousting tournament thing instead of the knighting ceremony, nimona being captured and being forced to turn into her “true” form rather than this new version with it just sort of happening bcuz of Emotions, etc. also the movie suffered from a lot of pacing and tone issues imo but the former i think is just from that lack of the slow buildup of their friendship, and the latter is something that i think just worked better in the book. idk again I’LL BE ABLE TO SAY THIS STUFF MORE CONCRETELY WHEN I ACTUALLY REREAD THE BOOK but i dont remember there being so much jokes and goofy shit DURING serious scenes. like iirc in the original during serious scenes it was SERIOUS. but in the movie theres so many unnecessary unfunny jokes and stuff. idk IDK i probably just had too high expectations idk. anyways

[gracefullou]

I’m going to sound like a hater but I’m disappointed. That could’ve been better. 31% of the set list was 1d/covers. I cannot believe that nc, wdbhg, dmd had a place but jho did not. How much input does he have on which songs will make the list? His fans have already proven they’ll be there for him so I’m having trouble understanding why he made this step back. Let 1dead stay dead. Festivals are a great opportunity for gp to get to know HIS music. It’s not the time to keep reminding and re-in forcing that he’s that boy bander. I wish that he stops playing it safe at the next festivals. Someone remind him that FITF is the success it was because he took a chance on himself and made the music he wanted to make. I’m sorry for the rant. Please delete if you want. Lastly, 7 and chemical also need to go.

Hi, anon. Unfortunately, i missed the live except for the last two songs but i think he did sing jho (at least it was there on the setlist). I get you, anon. I'm tired of the covers as well 😔. I know it's a festival therefore he prefers upbeat songs and songs that he mastered and is the most comfortable performing (bc why else is 7 even there? If you must do an "indie" cover at least choose 505 which is much more popular to the gp 🤷‍♀️ ). But four covers out of which THREE are from 1D is so very excessive. And It's not even about sending a message that he's now a solo artist with 2 solo albums, it's simply bc he has so many better songs that showcase what a phenomenal artist and incredible talent he is better than all those covers combined. Sooo many (all) fitf songs that could do a much better and easier job at making these strangers fall in love with his music are missing. Like hello headline and hoth would be crazy like honestly THE perfect introduction an artist can hope for. I know if i were at a festival/ concert and witnessed that hoth bridge insanity live i would look up that artist the moment he left the stage. And headline is such a fun song it's perfect for festivals. Those are just two examples, I could go on bc fitf is 10/10 album. Honestly i can understand him giving a nod to his 1D days by covering ONE of their songs and MAYBE ONE indie cover (or whatever the genre, just another artist's other than 1D) but no more. I can't help but feel like he's missing on opportunities here with the setlist that he's chosen. Although to be fair to him, it IS a very good setlist just not using his discography to its full potential

[dwtsfun]

Top 5 Edyta Partners

We're gonna go ahead and do the other longstanding season 1 pro, Miss Leg Warmers herself, Edyta! Edyta, I think is a pro that doesn't get enough credit for what she accomplished on the show. For one, she appeared on the first 10 seasons of the show and was the longest running pro at that time. She also managed to have several incredibly successful seasons, including a second place finish. She doesn't get the praise that she deserves. Especially because she has also had some tough seasons and difficult partners to deal with. So I'm here to give her her flowers before the end of 2023.

5. Lawrence and Edyta, Season 8

So I am only putting LT here for one reason and one reason only. He was actually one of Edyta's better dancers. The man easily could've been a semi-finalist in season 8 if he actually wanted to be there. His technique was good enough. He was extremely light on his feet. I actually think he could've been a better dancer than Emmitt Smith (someone I consider to be a top 3 NFL player on the show). Even with him not wanting to be there, Edyta managed to get some great performances out of him. Their last 4 dances actually had moments of greatness. Favorite Dances: Waltz, Argentine Tango

4. John and Edyta, Season 4

John wasn't originally Edyta's partner on this season. I'm honestly glad that he ended up signing on for the show because I really enjoyed this partnership. John was fun and dedicated. He also actually tried to learn each dance and perform them to the best of his ability. I love that I was able to see not only the performance aspect, but watch John really pay attention to the technical aspects of the dances. Unlike many older white men on this show, he did not rest solely on being charming and a performer. As a result, he and Edyta ended up having a truly respectable season. Favorite Dance: Foxtrot

3. Joey and Edyta, Season 3

During my rewatch of season 3, I dubbed myself this couple's biggest hater. However, that has nothing to do with my feelings of these two's partnership, but rather the way that the judges seemed to take things easy on them in comparison to many of the other couples. That being said, I actually quite enjoyed these two together. Joey was an awkward mover with a ton of potential. What Edyta was able to do with him was truly incredible. By the end of the season he transformed from a man who felt like he had to keep up the masculine image, to a man that let go and allowed his body to just move naturally and not care that the dance wasn't quite so masculine. He embraced his femininity. That is no easy feat and I will always applaud the female pros when they're able to break through the straight male psyche and toxic masculinity and pull out a more balanced man than they started the season with. Favorite Dances: 2nd Rumba, Foxtrot

2. Cameron and Edyta, Season 5

I was originally going to have Cameron and Joey swapped. But after rewatching their dances, I remembered how much I enjoyed Cameron. To me, this couple was the counterpart to Jennie and Derek (another one of my favorite Derek partners). TV star that had a lot of potential, was up and down in scores throughout the competition and found their footing toward the end of the show. Cameron and Edyta looked good together, worked well together and had great chemistry. Cameron's improvement from the time he started until his last dance was something to be applauded. Favorite Dances: Paso Doble, Viennese Waltz

1. Jason and Edyta, Season 6

Jason was a very talented dancer and Edyta was able to realize this and took full advantage of it. Edyta gave us her best choreography and pushed Jason to be the best version of himself on that dancefloor. Now, Jason's Latin wasn't always the best, but his ballroom was top notch. He was one of the most graceful men that I've ever seen dance on this show. It sucks that their season was basically Kristi's to lose, and she and Mark never ever let up on the gas. I truly do believe that in most other seasons, as long as they kept up the same level of dancing, Jason would have won. These two had an amazing journey and provided us with several great dances. Favorite Dances: Quickstep, Viennese Waltz, Tango

[fastasyoucan1999]

hiya hiya hiyaaaa love <33 saw the book ask thing and thought omigosh literally great excuse to be in your inbox ive missed it hfhfxx 2 and 4 and (if you wouldn't mind) feel free to rant about airport day !! delayed twice omg i would. perrish. ur being so brave how was itt hope the flight went/is going well im sending you cookies and kisses <33

LAYLA <33 hi!!! we can eat your cookies while we chat! i love when you visit i've got a whole guest room meant just for you

airport day was an EXPERIENCE. look i am not a girl meant for travel. my heart is the size of a mouse and it beats at the pace of a hummingbird's wing... i'm like one of those hamsters that dies of fright. but long and the short of it i got a iced chai at the little airport cafe and ate the blandest turkey sandwich of my life while staring senselessly at the wall :)

there was a bit of a seat mix-up which i will take full accountability for. a woman was sitting in my seat and i went <3 peace and love that's HER seat now <3 bc one thing about me. i will never be confrontational even in the most low-risk situations xx but i forgot that by letting her have my seat i was. uh effectively stealing someone else's. but we figured it out and then i stared out the window yipee!! there was a bit of rough turbulence but i am turbulence’s number one fan i think it's comforting! makes my life feel small and close like a warm blanket

ok books though!

did you reread anything? what?

i reread a few things! firstly frankenstein who is my gf. i have a few rereads of her under my belt! lit profs love to assign frankenstein and you know what i love to read frankenstein

also the raven cycle! what a joy! i'm not sure what was going on with me last year that i somehow read trc and then just... moved on. that did not happen this time lol i've got the physical copies with me now and i plan to take advantage and go for a third reread why not <3

catcher in the rye! sorry holden haters my immunity to vitriol teenagers is just so incredibly strong and unbeatable. also castle of otranto by horace walpole (literally imagine this being ur name. no just think about it for a moment) which was another lit class reread for me. it's a little goofy very sensational, probably written in the worst format possible and i have completely neutral feelings on it lol

did you discover any new authors that you love this year?

answered here but... is it a cop out to say maggie stiefvater? i feel like she’s infiltrating these answers like an invasive species...

[woozi]

my yza! hello! it has been a while again, i hope you're well? your header is SO cute 🐯

i missed you too! we r penpals... oh i do love that image. i will seal my letters with a kiss every time. MUAH

dolo (dino solo) really did reunite us! perhaps this can be our always. speaking of dolo - he SLAYED with that. ate it the fuck up, wait slaps SO hard i'm obsessed w her!!! what are your thoughts 👀 i'm dying to know

thank you! i get my first results in jan, around the time i'm sitting my second batch of exams. eek. uni applications are around the same time and i'm still working on my personal statement; i'm terrified it won't be good enough <//3

this freshteen comeback was SO good. you're so right abt it being a refresher to why we originally fell in love w their sound </333

back 2 back is my GIRRLLLLL she slaps!!! i mentioned this but perf u songs are always killer for me i LOVE their sound. but monster omg! she is cunty but i do get you. as for sos. what can i say. the lyrics just rub me the wrong way idk the phrasing just seems a bit... odd, and insensitive, perhaps. but like you say, english is not their first language, so i will give them the benefit of the doubt. what are your thoughts, though?

minghao discovered the mullet and then discovered a million different ways to slay it, and i love that for him. most versatile mullet ever!

we DO need more jun appreciation did you catch him in the diamond days vid! my guy! he was so good!

also omg... dr ms yza? perhaps? you'd be utterly incredible. i feel you on life being a little crazy; i hope things have calmed down for you since, though. i've not been up to much! i work at a school now, did i mention? i'm a teaching assistant for year 1 (5-6yos) so i do that mostly, and i'm also studying for all my exam retakes. i'm 1/3 of the way done currently and it is so fucking bad.

i hope your days have been treating you well! sending you hugs and kisses xxx i really am happy to be penpalling with you again. take care, love you, MWAH <3333333

your beloved wife 💍,

honey <3

MY HONEY, HIIIIIIIII 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

thank u sm for being so so kind 🥺 AND YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm v glad to say that life has been treating me better, or at least i've learned to handle everything better hehe <33 HOW R UUUUUUUUUUU I MISSED U SO MUCH!!

PLS U ARE SO SO CUTE 😭 also so real abt dolo <3 I LIKED IT!!!!!!!! i'm glad he took that direction music and style wise tbh, i was NERVOUS it'd sound like... (not to be a hater but i didnt really enjoy last order 😭) love the bridge it's my favorite part <33

HOW WERE UR RESULTSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS im so so eager to hear from u, every time we talk it's like you're hitting new milestones <33

YK WHAT THE FUNNIEST THING JUST HAPPENED JJKFDJKFD BACK 2 BACK LITERALLY STARTED PLAYING THE MOMENT I STARTED ANSWERING UR ASK 😭 and ure sOOO so correct abt perf u songs!! more people should recognize the powerhouse that perf u is imo 😋 ALSO AGREED ON SOS 😭 honestly my least favorite song from the album. aside from what u just mentioned, it just sounds (lyric-wise) very clunky to me

I SAWWWWWW!! also glad jun's getting more recognition nowadays <33 i think thats the BeTS effect

well, as life turns out, i'm now in corporate and not in med school FDKJJDKFJKFD but it's fun!! and a little crazy, but that's just perfect for my personality tbh jsjkdjds ALSO IT'S MY FIRST TIME HEARING ABT THAT!! that's so so cute and i'm so happy for u 🥺 sending u sm strength in whatever endeavor you're taking rn!! hope the exams turned out well <33

AND I COULD LITERALLY SAY THE SAME!!!!!!!! i lov u so much, thank u for being such a constant friend <333 u make my stay here much much more enjoyable <3 LOV U MWAH

[stxleslyds]

MY TOUGHTS ON THE END OF RED HOOD BY CHIP ZDARSKY.

Dishonour! Dishonour on you, dishonour on your cow! 

Well Jason Nation, it happened again, fanon wins over canon. The amount of bullshit that DC made Zdarsky write in this issue is insane, I have never seen this many fanfiction tropes shoved in a single issue in my life.

This book has been a constant insult to Jason’s character and his Red Hood “persona” since the very first issue but I never thought it would end this badly. It’s incredibly sad.

I will go ahead and say it, this tumblr and this post is not “Batfamily” friendly and it definitely isn’t fanon friendly when it comes to Jason Todd.

Fanon is destroying canon for Jason Todd. I am sorry but that’s how I see it, fanon doesn’t belong in canon, I would never get tired of saying that. But here is the thing, DC latches on to Jason’s fanon version because it fits their narrative of “the Batman is all that is right and all must follow his rules or they shall disappear”.

DC has been dying to make Jason bland and flavourless just like Batman. And now here it finally is.

Let’s be honest the story in this book, the new drug, Cheer, Tyler and his mom, none of that shaped this story, none of those things were the support beams for it. It was all about this never ending “daddy issues” thing that DC pretends is going on between Jason and Bruce.

It was all about those two fighting because they “think differently” so in the end they can push Jason towards the “no killing rule” being also the Red Hood’s modus operandi.

Its utter bullshit.

From the moment that Jason had to put a bat suit on I knew that this was going to be a mess. Luckily like I predicted they didn’t make a big deal out of him wearing it but the “Jason admires Batman” feeling was very present in the issue.

I will not talk about how easy it was for that one thug to land a punch on Jason while he was distracted and I will also not talk about Jason being a dumbass for not securing his dumb mask better when he knew the fight will involve gases. I will not talk about it.

Anyway, let’s talk about the Cheer Gas induced illusion, shall we?

In Jason’s illusion he finds Bruce at the manor looking at the picture of Joker’s death (?) and even though that is strange what Bruce says next is even weirder, he says this: “I did it. He was the last one, but I did it…Joker is dead. I am done.”

Now what the hell was that? This is Jason’s illusion, and by the looks of it in his illusion Bruce has killed every baddie in Gotham and left the Joker for last? Am I reading that right? Is this this a joke?

I understand that this is an illusion so the gas is making “real” things that Jason probably doesn’t know he wants, like wanting Bruce to go on a killing spree, which Jason never wanted because he said it himself, do you guys remember the iconic “I’m not talking about killing Cobblepot and Scarecrow or Clayface. Not Riddler or Dent…I’m talking about HIM. Just him.” Because I remember and it’s so important to Jason’s character, Jason never wanted Bruce to go on a killing spree, he wanted Bruce to kill the clown who had killed him when he was only fifteen. Is that so hard to remember DC?

And then it gets worse! Since WHEN has Jason wanted a perfect family life with the people that he has tried to kill, harm or looked down to? Why is “being with a bunch of people who NEVER get together for anything other than “help” the Bat in a fight against a fucking clown” the idea of happiness to Jason? Has this man ever interacted with any of these people in a positive way without the intrusion of a Batman/Robin event in the way? I will give you the answer, it’s no, the answer is no.

Jason Todd doesn’t care for your “Batfamily” bullshit DC, why would it matter to him? Because he was Robin? He was killed by the Joker when he was Robin, and he was killed because the man in charge of him didn’t pay enough attention! Jason Todd who was written as Dick Grayson’s number one hater for so long (and fandom loves that) is now having an illusion where he enjoys happy times with him along the others? Cass and Stephanie? What? Am I missing something, is this actually AO3, is this fanfiction?

I think Zdarsky got confused, this illusion is what would happen if Jason were dosed with fear gas. That must be it, I solved it everyone! Zdarsky just got confused by his own writing!

I wish.

Let’s go back to the sad reality, Jason has a moment in which he actually puts all his training in motion and shakes of the gas’s grasp on him. He does that but he is grabbed by so many people (who are this people?) and he is unarmed and I believe that’s the only reason why Cheer is still alive after saying that he has someone in Tyler’s mom’s hospital room ready to kill her if he doesn’t join him.

(If this were the real Jason, Cheer would have dropped dead instantly.)

But this is not the real Jason and this is not a *real* comic, it’s fanfiction! So just like that time in Batman #100 when Dick was fighting alone as Nightwing (for the first time since his “family” left him alone after losing his memories) the rest of the “family” shows up to fight Cheer and four random thugs.

Yep, its like the MCU had considered having Cap say “Avengers Assemble” when they were fighting a couple of robots instead of Thanos.

What a mess.

Also having Jason say, in real life (not illusion world), “You know what happiness is? It’s knowing that others have your back.” about this group of people is the perfect recipe for a big OOC moment for absolutely everyone. I cannot believe they have dragged Jason back to this awful concept and that they have sank him so low. It’s quite honestly, disgusting.

But the horrors don’t end there, we have a wonderful moment after Jason gives Batman the antidote, Jason stops Batman from punching the living shit out of Cheer. Because I am not stupid. There is no way in the world that you can convince me that Jason just stopped Batman from killing Cheer.

How incredibly delusional do you have to be to write Batman finally killing someone and that someone being Cheer, a guy that was introduced to comics two months ago?

Yes, later its said that between the gas and the antidote Bruce was a little too crazy and couldn’t help himself BUT I call bullshit once more, because Bruce has gone completely bat-shit-crazy on people before! I remember two recent instances in which that happened. Batman #57 in which Bruce beats the living shit out of KGBeast after he shot Dick. And the other one is Batman beating up Jason more brutally than he ever beat up Joker in RHatO #25.

DC cannot fuck with me. I might has bought this digital comic for 8 dollars but I am not buying that bullshit.

ALSO, there was no need for Zdarsky to do Jason as dirty as he did him when he made him say: “If you are going to come down from mount judgement to MY level for once… he’s not the guy to do it for.”

Zdarsky, why did you write a Red Hood story when you hate Red Hood? Couldn’t you have just told DC that you wanted to write a love letter to Batman? Once again, I am reading a Red Hood story for RED HOOD content not Batman content. Is it really that hard? I bet that if Zdarsky had asked DC to let him write a Batman story they would have said yes, there are like 20 Batman stories, they wouldn’t say no to one more!

Can you tell I am mad? And salty?

This post is so long and so full of anger, I am truly sorry for that but I have to write these feelings down or I would explode. And I am not even done, our suffering, Jason Nation, continues.

But first a little break from the pain, Tyler. Thank you after all the pain this book has given me Tyler is back and just like I predicted his mom is fine and he will stay with her, they both have been given a place and money to rebuild their life (not given by Jason nor Dick but I was close enough). The only happy ending that Tyler could have, he had and I am thankful for that, we even got a little adorable moment between the Red Hood and the Blue Hood.

I am weak for these little glimpses of a good Jason take in the middle of an incredibly awful/OOC story. And just to live in my own fantasy world I will headcanon that Jason promised himself to keep an eye out for Tyler and his mom. He would have wanted to know about their life and that they are still out of trouble.

Jason is a good man, don’t you forget that DC, I don’t care how much you twist it. Jason killing Tyler’s dad wasn’t a horrible act, it was fair game. That man was a horrible person, he drugged his child and made his wife (?) almost overdose. You never gave context as to why that man was working as a drug dealer but you told us those things so Jason should never feel like he did something wrong. As far as we know, Tyler and his mom are better off without him.

Having said that, lets go back to the pain of what is reading a Red Hood story.

“I’m giving up the guns.”

You know what, fine, as long as DC doesn’t pull another “I will stop being Red Hood for you Barbara” I will be fine. He can kill people with other things, he used to have the all-blades, he had normal swords and he had crowbars.

I will sacrifice Jason looking hot as hell when he pulls out his guns just to keep him as the Red Hood, all DC has to do is not give him that stupid… bat… symbol… oh no…. oh my god I can feel it… that thing, that horrible thing is making a comeback! NO!

Jason and Bruce’s talk is basic and it doesn’t do anything for anyone, in the end saying that Jason isn’t changing his ways for Bruce but that he is doing it for himself is more of the same. We know he is doing it for Bruce and we know DC is doing it because they cannot handle good, complex and interesting characters. We know that and sadly we have to live with it.

About Bruce’s illusion, well, Bruce has said that he wanted to kill the clown for a very long time and in the King run it was basically said that if Bruce were to be happy then the idea of Batman would die.

Listen, between me and you, sometimes I think that the Joker isn’t that big of a problem for Gotham as a whole, that clown has beef with the Bat and no one else. If Bruce has killed the Joker Jason would have been happy with Bruce all those years ago but killing the Joker wouldn’t make Gotham a safe place and any of his kids happier.

Bruce needs to care for his children, but he won’t do that, he has Dick for that. Taking care and raising Damian? No, thank you, I will not do that. Giving a shit about my son who lost all his memories and is alone? No thank you, I won’t do that and then I will lie about having watched him over. Tim? Oh, never heard of him, sorry.

The last page of this story is the one of Jason arriving home and finding a new suit that Bruce gave him with the bat symbol on it. That symbol that he had ripped off of Jason’s beat up body back in RHatO #25 (nope, I am not letting that one go).

Oh, and Bruce leaving that suit in Jason’s home gives me the same exact vibes as the time that Bruce was like “Long overdue. This is where you belong. As one of us. One of the family” in Nightwing #74 a second after Dick had regained his memories.

I don’t know why but they make him sound incredibly cold and like these people are just his pawns that he needs to rope back in every time they get away from him. It’s very disturbing.

Anyway, that’s all from me, I obviously LOVED this book, best Jason Todd/Red Hood characterisation ever! 11/10 would recommend to everyone including my enemies!

🙃

[devildomdoofus]

I saw you said your commissions are open, if it's ok can I request a fluffy morning with the demon brothers, please? I just found your blog but I already fell in love with your writing style 😍. I hope you have a great day 🤗

Thank you so very much!! 😭 I’m over the moon that I can make you happy with my writing and I’ll GLADLY take this request ✨ I hope you have a great day as well!!

I also hope I’ve done your request justice 🥺

- DevildomDoofus

Through Morning’s Rays

Fluffy mornings with the Obey Me! Brothers

💙Lucifer:

Both of your schedules differed a generous amount. He wakes up the earliest out of the House of Lamentation and Purgatory Hall combined, to ensure everyone’s up and ready for school/work/etc.... and he is the last to go to bed.

That is, if he isn’t dog tired by the time he’s finished doing his last rounds of security checks and sending any remaining night owls to their rooms to keep their schedules in check, and collapses at his desk while finalizing reports.

You, on the other hand, have a steady schedule due to your obligations to your school (and job, if you worked).

To say that you two have a hard time spending any amount of quality time together is an understatement

Please forgive him, he is a lone father and he is trying his best

When he’s up early to get a head start in working to the bone, as usual and doesn’t have much time to share the fleeting, morning hours with you, he’ll gingerly place a kiss to the top of your head and shift the blankets from your late night tossing and turning, back to their place over your shoulders and covers the rest of your body. He’ll leave a little note by the bedside table that wishes you a wonderful day and promises that he’ll meet with you shortly to make up for lost time.

On the rare occasions that he manages to be able to share mornings with you, it is like a gift from the celestial realm to you both in which afterwards, the two of you are like completely different people, beaming with sunshine and happiness as your batteries have been recharged.

In those rare moments, he’ll slide to your side of the bed, oh so carefully snake his arm around you and tugs you gently into his embrace as he places kisses all atop your head. When you finally open your eyes and face him, he’ll run his hand up the length of your silhouette to your face, cupping it, rub his thumb over your cheek and smile lazily. “Good morning, lamb.” He whispers, trying to disguise the grogginess in his voice. Then, he leans down to press his lips against yours in a way that makes you feel like he’s been starving for you for months on end, only to now get what he’s craved and yet it’s not enough.

In this moment, nothing in all of the realms matters to him more than you. Just you and you alone.

💛Mammon:

You spent many, many, MANY mornings with him and they were some of your favorite memories since you first came to the Devildom. For him.... well, maybe not at first since you were kind of a chore. But the was before you two became so close.

The only problem was that neither of you were morning people, especially if either of you had responsibilities that day like school or work. To deal with such a thing, the two of you made a deal where each of you took turns being the one to help wake the other.

There were mornings where he woke you up with a heavy pillow to the torso and it ended up in you two being late for school due to an epic pillow fight that neither of you wanted to lose.

Other mornings, you woke him up by jumping and flopping around next to him on the bed, belting a song that was the favorite of the pair of you, and he tackles you back down to the bed to deliver you a piping hot plate of a tickle fight

and then there were THOSE mornings.

These mornings, when the two of you just happened to wake around the same time, he’d smile sleepily, yank you closer, and place a kiss on your forehead. “Mornin’, my lil’ human.”

UGH, that gravely, morning voice would be the bittersweet death of you.

While having a few hours to spare, you would lay there in the semidarkness, whispering sweet everythings to each other, exchanging kisses and joke ensued laughter, and simply enjoying each other’s company while entangled in a comfy, cozy embrace.

🧡Leviathan:

It’s the same sort of situation as with Mammon; neither of you were really morning people. But with you two, it was because it came with the terms and conditions of being like minded nerds (as a fellow ‘nerd,’ I mean that term in the best way possible and as a compliment) in which the endgame boss had to be defeated, or that one episode simply could not be missed, or your favorite celebrity/idol was going live and you were not about to be absent for it. Many evenings were spent indulging in both of your favorite hobbies, well into the latest hours of the night and early morning, when you should’ve been sleeping instead.

So of course, mornings were INCREDIBLY ROUGH for the two of you.

In the beginning and a majority of the time, you were the one to wake him up. I hope you can forgive him, though, because almost all of his energy is spent drowning out his negative thoughts and the outside judgement from his own brothers, haters, and toxic fans alike via his hobbies and he doesn’t quite have enough energy to take care of himself, including waking up on time for school or other responsibilities/obligations to avoid getting an ass-chewing from Lucifer... much less waking up on time and then having to wake YOU up.

You had to show him the way, in a sense. You’re his motivation and safety net. Where you go, and ensure his ‘safety’ he delightfully follows. Ergo, you had to be the alarm clock for him, for a while, to be shown that you truly care about him and it’s not all just some exasperating, ridiculously elaborate and heart shattering prank.

Your method of ‘raising the dead’ was to gently comb your hand through his hair while softly beckoning him from his dream world with your sweetest voice to ‘the land of the living.’ His eyes would flutter open and as soon as he saw you with that heartwarming smile, his face would turn a deep crimson and he’d smile back, reaching a hand up to place it over top of yours, somewhat nuzzling into it. “Good morning, my human Henry.” His shy, quiet, gravely voice could melt lava.

Through this method of yours, he no longer woke with animosity for the normie world but was rather hopeful and optimistic, feeling as if nothing could bring him down. Not even his brothers’ insults.

Eventually, he got the hang of it, and he was the one waking YOU up and he did so as sweetly as you had done. He’d place his hand on your cheek, rub his thumb over it, and gingerly place a multitude of kisses atop your head as he whispered your name until you woke.

Some mornings when he was feeling extra giddy, he would place a little speaker near where you had fallen asleep and quietly play your favorite song as he sang along and took hold of your hands to swing them gently to the beat. He saw it once in an anime episode and was hoping it would award him the same giggles the love interest gave the protagonist.

Fortunately for him, it always did.

💚Satan:

Being one of the more mature and responsible brothers, he rarely ever slept in. It’s just in his nature to be an early bird to catch the early worm.. mostly to get it over with so he could get back to doing what he loved most; reading in comfort. Even still, his schedule matched with yours almost perfectly, and that’s due to the fact that, similar to Leviathan, you two were likeminded.

You had the same interests and hobbies so of course, the pair of you grew very close, very quickly. You first linked up for study sessions because celestial realm knows that school in the Devildom was VASTLY different than human world schools, then book club meetings for when you got a little more comfortable with each other’s presence, then as you became even closer, you just decided to do the same things at the same time as it killed two birds with one stone; you got to do what you enjoyed with the person you enjoyed the most.

Mornings to you two were fairly simple and honestly, quite enjoyable with the other being there when you woke.

One morning, Satan took the first step and woke you to the pleasant sound of one of your favorite records echoing from an antique gramophone while placing a tray of your favorite breakfast foods next to the bed. He then leant down, took your hand into his, and kissed from your knuckles, all the way up to your shoulder, and then planting one final, light kiss to your cheek. “My darling MC, it is time to come back to me. Your dreams have had you long enough.”

From then on, you took turns in trying to wake the other in the most romantic ways possible. From your favorite flower’s petals scattering the bed, to his favorite audio books reading him awake. There was nothing that you two wouldn’t do in order to guarantee that the other woke to nothing less than the world on a silver and golden platter.

He was the envy of his brothers especially Mammon, getting to spend so much time with you and having you smile as brightly as you did with him.

💖Asmodeus:

Surprisingly, he’s another early riser. Though when you really think about it, it isn’t quite that surprising, considering he has a strict self-care routine that CANNOT be broken, lest he wishes to end up with a pimple or even worse... a wrinkle! Which neither are bad if you have them, it’s just for Asmo’s personal tastes for his own appearance, he prefers to have none of them.

Because he cares for you so much, he forces sternly asks that you have the same schedule as he does so he can give you the same love and care as he gives himself. He wants you to look and feel as wonderful as who you are on the inside... but he also loves it when you absolutely SHINE.

Please don’t be mistaken, he doesn’t think you’re ugly or unattractive or any other negative thoughts you might have about yourself, in the least. Not at ALL. He simply wishes to amplify what wonderful assets you already have (to your own tastes, of course) because of that oh so magnificent way you carry yourself when you feel your best.

Want to as pretty as a sunset? He’s got you covered. Want to be as handsome as... well, him? You’re covered there too. Want a little mix of any and everything? Oh please, give him a challenge! Whatever look you wish for, he’s there to help you make it happen.

You just have to take his hand and follow his lead. And his lead requires that you be ‘up and at ‘em’ early enough to go through the self-care routine (that he handpicked things for, according to you and your body’s needs), and eat the proper foods so your body and mind can handle the weight of being the most stunning thing to walk the face of any of the realms... besides him, of course. Also, all of this has to happen before school begins.

Unfortunately, that’s pretty early. There’s a LOT of self-care to-do’s that you two have to go through to ensure maximum amplification.

But because he knows that this can be rather overwhelming and a bit stressful to keep up with all of the time (and stress causes physical and mental harm), he’s always sure to make your mornings as pleasant and stress-free as possible.

He lights one of your favorite candles or incenses, and/or turns one of your favorite slower/softer songs on then climbs into bed and over top of you to begin his trails of kisses from the top of your head, down your face, neck and chest, further down your precious tummy, and stops right at your hips to go back up your body and start again. All of this on repeat as he coos and whispers your name, his soothing voice leading you from your dreams to the waking world. When your eyes meet his, he hums “ahh, my dear, you’ve returned to me.” He moves to kiss your lips as sweetly as he speaks.

He then slips his arms underneath you and lifts you up, as if you were one of Lucifer’s feathers, to carry you bridal style into the bathroom. He’ll then set you down and slowly undress you, taking as much time as you need him to, before helping you into the tub and giving you the gentlest of washes you’ve had since before you can even remember.

He’s the most soothing alarm that’s ever existed.

❤️Beelzebub:

Not really an early riser but he’s also not one to sleep in, either. To sleep in means to miss breakfast, and to miss breakfast is a death sentence for himself and anyone in the way of his next meal.

It also means that he doesn’t get to spend his mornings or share breakfast with you. Another death sentence but this one’s for his heart. Even though he might not say it, being that putting his thoughts and feelings into words is a bit harder than his more comfortable/natural way of simply showing you through his actions, he loves you very, very, VERY much.

This man cares so fucking much for you, he’d give up eating for the rest of his life if it meant you got to have a crumb. But he hopes it doesn’t have to come to that.

The way that Beel shows you that he cares is through food. Eating with you, cooking with you, watching you eat to be sure that you’re getting enough food in your own body, taking his time to eat his food because, now, he’s too busy having wonderful conversations with you, and every and anything in between.

One of his favorite ways is breakfast in bed. You had done it once for him before on one of your anniversaries and ever since then, he’s done it for you in return whenever he got the chance.

On mornings that he had waken up early enough, he’d quietly get up and tiptoe to the kitchen to make both of you a delicious breakfast. If Belphegor was up, on the rarest of rare occasions that he was, he’ll make a little something for him too. He’d put together your favorite foods and beverage while doing the same for himself, draw a cute little heart on a small post-it note and placing it on your side of the tray, tip-toe back up to the room and sets it on the nightstand beside the bed, then moves in close to you to start waking you up. He leans in close and peppers your face in little kisses before moving a little lower to your neck and giving his signature, gentle bite. “MC, honey, wake up. I’ve brought you breakfast.”

Nine times out of ten, you wake up in an instant. When you’ve slept heavily during the night and have a harder time waking up, he plops down onto you gently of course as to not squish you and groans in your ear, nibbling them to remind you of who you’re keeping waiting. “MCCC, pleeeease, I’m hungry. Don’t make me eat yours.”

The warning never fails.

As you two chow down, his dimpled smile never leaves his face nor his eyes on you as he watches you enjoy another morning filled with your favorite things: Beel and Beel’s signature breakfast.

💜Belphegor:

Morning? What the hell is a morning?

Yeah, yeah, he knows what a morning is. He’s had to get up for them too many fucking times to count in order to get to school on time.. or at least try. His attendance is, more or less, nonexistent. He’s just not a morning person.

at ALL.

WHAT. SO. EVER.

The one thing ‘Mr. Sandman’ doesn’t do is wake up or get woken up if the awakener values their life

However... if it is you, his favorite walking and talking pillow, he can’t be that pissed about it. It’s a little more of a smooth transition from being asleep to being awake when you’re the one bringing him there.

So, yes, you’re the one waking him up and it’s never the other way around, but you knew this would be your lot in life the closer you had gotten to him.

And yet, whenever you tried to wake him, he’d simply wrap his arm over you and drag you back down onto the bed as he rolls on top of you, nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck. “No.” he’d groan in his gravelly morning voice.

What? What did he mean ‘no’ ?! It’s time to get up!!

You’d try your best to to wiggle free but Belphegor is far more stronger than he looks and keeps you pinned down in place. Well... at least it’s comfy.

Wait no, this is his way of coercing you to go back to sleep with him!

Before you can try something else, he plants warm and slow kisses up and down your neck and nibbles at the skin just beneath your ear while whispering in a low tone, “why don’t we just stay here and do something better than go to school?”

Your face heats up and body tenses underneath him. It was not uncommon for him to try this tactic, especially in the morning, so you were fairly used to it but sometimes... sometimes it just does something to you and you’re frozen in place with nothing but his voice to lull you wherever it pleased. Maybe it came with being the Avatar of Sloth? He moves up onto his elbows to deliver his final attack that was his signature, teasing smile in order for him to fully keep you here, in bed, with him and simply enjoy each other’s company while you slept.

Unfortunately for him, this was his mistake and you gained yourself a foothold in pushing him off of you. Getting up from the bed, you look back at him as you straighten your clothes out and fix your hair, saying “Breakfast is in ten minutes,” with a stern voice. You take notice of this and try to sweeten it up to truly convince him. “Be there, won’t you?” you demand more than request, with a signature smile of your very own.

He brings his dropped jaw back up from when you were able to knock him off, and shakes his head as he lightly chuckles. “Whatever you want, MC.” Before you completely walk out of the door, he calls after you. “You owe me!”

You peak back in just enough for him to hear you as you’re closing the door. “No, you owe me.”

[elrosil]

(Soundtrack for the story) TRIGGER WARNING: VIOLENCE, CURSING, ILLIDARI CRUDENESS

Elrosil sat leaned up against the wall after a long day of Illidari training, she drank a bottle of water and looked up at the sky, tracing the Black Temple with her light green eyes and looks over to the side at the fellow elves training with her. A man suddenly leaned against the wall next to her, it made a loud thud. She looks over slowly, "The fuck? Oh hey....sup Sinmar?"

The male Sin'dorei, very handsome leaned in a kissed Elrosil on the cheat, "Hey you. So have you put any thought into it?"   "Into what? What demon to hunt for my ritual? Yeah think I know what I want."

"What demon?" he smirks and moves matted by sweat hair from her face.

She looks over slowly to him, "Shivarra."

He looks dumb founded and blinks a few times, "What? You want to go for the same demon as me? El....come on...."

She narrows her brows, "Come on what?" she swats away his hand and studies his eye, "You dont think I can hunt one do you?"

He shakes his head, "Come on Elrosil....your like.....a C class Illidari at best....you spend more time on your back then taking things serious....those arent easy demons to capture....why not go for something more your speed....like...an imp...."

Her mouth hangs open slightly, as she shoves him away from her personal space, "Excuse you....just because you think I dont take myself serious, doesnt mean I dont....you dont know the first thing about me....." she walks over and picks up her warglaive and runs off.

Two more Ilidari join Sinmar, one grabbing a bottle of water and the other looks at him and then points at Elrosil, "Where is she going? Did you piss her off again?"

He looks at his friends, "She is off to get herself killed, she thinks she can hunt a Shivarra for her ritual...."

The other two male Sin'Dorei snort a laugh.

"Yeah what I said...inside....she is off to get herself killed."

Elrosil slaps her warglaives onto her back and shakes her head quite annoyed, "I will show those fucking haters....dont think I am a capable of catching a big ass demon, that little dick prick said hunt an imp, will shove an imp down his throat where he spends the next week shitting a imp tooth enema....fucking Sin'dorei....."

She grumbled and muttered for hours about Sin'dorei not noticing she two was hunted. Shadowmoon always had a darkness to it, but suddenly it was darker than normal, a shadow cast upon her. Elrosil knew it something was behind her. She turns quickly the massive sapphire six armed demon stood behind her, swinging down all six sword clad arms to drive her blades into the feeble elf. Elrosil dipped forward, rolling onto her shoulder between the legs of the demon, grasping a handful of stones, tossing them at the the back of the legs of the demon as came out on the other side.

The Shivarra swings its two upper arms down at Elrosil, falling back and roll out of harms way, swords raked the dirt she just knelt at. Taking a stand she leaps over a nearby stone to get out of the way of the six armed sword smith. She turns to face the demon look face to face, the demon would kill her, she knew it. But she was going to show those other elves, show everyone she could accomplish the greatest of feats. She pushes off the blackened gravel and runs towards the demon, swinging her arms in different directions, maze and razor steel showed only one clear path. Elrosil spring boarding off the rock she just hopped over, she clamped her thighs onto the abdomen of the Shivarra, her leather pants shredded in the fan of blades she had to get through.

Not able to remove her glaives she did the only thing she knew, to take it to the streets, punching her fist in to the packed core of the demon. It felt like punching stone. She grit and grunted as she was relentless on the demon, not stopping, no matter how much her knuckles bleed. The Shivarra cackled, turning her sword, where the flat of it cut into back of Elrosil shirt, like a clothes hanger wields a top, the blade hugged between her shoulder blades. Elrosil hissed in pain as the demon peel the elf from her body.

Dropped to the ground, Elrosil looks up at the demon who could of easily snapped her back. The sneer of pearly fangs as the demons lullaby voice spoke, "You are brave or stupid, I will give you that. Now stand and fight and die with your honor."

Elrosil pushes herself up slowly, blood painting her leather garbs backside. She spits to the side and reaches behind her to remove the glaives. The demon swung with incredible speed, disarming the glaives, the clatter of the metal, heard behind her, Elrosil watched them fly through the air and back at the demon, "How am I to fight you with no weapons? What about honor?"

"You did not seem to need those weapons a moment ago...fight me with that same passion, not with your weapons...."

Elrosil knew she couldn't win this way. She was at a disadvantage. She snarls and had no other choice at the time, she clenches a tight fist and nods, "Very well."

The Shivarra confident she could kill the sole elf she swings down all six blades at the spot that Elrosil stood. Elrosil skips forward, stepping onto the knee of the demon, her left heel driving down into the rib cage, in full swing with a kick flip, claps the top of her right foot into the chin of the Shivarra, landing on the ground with bent knees, grabbing a stone, large enough to be used as a murder weapon, but small enough that her agility was not compromised.

With the slanted hat demon she turns to swing those blades at Elrosil. The stone is lifted up in the air, catching the first sword, pushing into it, Elrosil kicks out her leg into the knee as hard as she could muster, drawing back as the demon staggered forward, swinging the stone to collide with the Shivarra's face as she lowered to Elrosil level. She spins quickly as the demon brought a hooked hand around, in full swing with her stone kissing the side of her face, the stone hammered with a blade, sparks of earthen dust spray into the Illidari in trainings face.

She coughs, using that movement, and escape peel back, taking her rock with her. The sword impales the ground, allowing Elrosil to strike once more. Spinning twice around to get speed as she slams that stone right back into the face of the Shivarra. The demon sputters a glob of fel blood to the ground where they fought and snarls looking back at Elrosil. The demon stood up, striking the ground in front of Elrosil, which she jumped back to avoid, the fours arm lift overhead cleaving downwards to strike her. She lifts her stone to meet all four blades. The sheer force alone cut through the stone, dulling the first set of blades to strike past Elrosil, but the last two clipped into her shoulders.

She howled in pain, looking up as she demon had trapped her in metal. The Shivarra wasted no time and has the other four arms hold Elrosil in place and stand up lifting her in the air to look the elf face to face. She would commend her before killing her. She never fought like this.

"A shame really....you fought different, everyone who fights the Legion, are skilled, trained, disciplined, but you are rare....you fought like a survivor, thrown in this situation, a situation you were never pre...."

Trying to go on with her speech, Elrosil despite her pain head butt the demon, only to get the roaring cackle out of her, "As I said a survivor.....and sadly this is your end...."

"Or yours!" Elrosil snarls as she reaches into her tattered crimson soaked tunic, she never had just glaives, she pulled from the back of her pants two daggers, in such close range, she drove both daggers in the same fashion that the Shivarra attacked and jabbed the daggers into the eye socks of the demon. The demon howled in pain jolting around in a panic, releasing from the swords in Elrosil body, to only have her dig and swirl those daggers deeper into the eyes, removing from the socket and swinging around her arm to strike the demons face a second, third and fourth time, until it fell to the ground, fell back and cradled Elrosil from the fall.

She had won, she would should them now.

What was weeks later, the Illidari in training lined up with Kayn Sunfury before them, as he looks at the lineup, "It would be appear Elrosil is missing, seems her hunt was not successful."

Sinmar shakes his head, "She should of stuck to hunting an imp, she was never skilled enough to take on something so big...."

Kayn's gaze snaps to Sinmar, "She was just as good as all of you, do not judge my trained fighters because you only saw one part of her, if she went to fight a Shivarra, they are formidable demons to fight, anyone one of you could fall to them....."

He silents as the bouncy head of a Shivarra rolled between them, like a bowling ball, the eye sockets were reshaped, the face slightly split and shadow of Illidians horns cast forward, thinking it to be him, the Illidari in training and Kayn quickly bow to there knees to show respect. The sly and snide voice of Elrosil as she said, "You dont have to all bow at once...."

Sinmar looks up in shock, and sees it is Elrosil, her horns glorious, in the form of Illidans, he knelt in shock. The others looking up at the same time, to witness this, Kayn Sunfury proud. Elrosil walks up the steps and stops at Sinmar looking down at him as she snarls, "You will never tell me ever again what I can and cant do....I fucking killed a Shivarra what have you done with you life...." Sinmar started to speak only to have Elrosil spit directly into his mouth, "Thanks needed a garbage can to spit into." She walks past him to take the front of the line for training, "So what we working on today?"

@daily-writing-challenge​

[life-rewritten]

DISMAYS VS RELIEFS AKA REVIEW/RANTS OF BL IN SEPTEMBER NOVEMBER

It's been an interesting experience this past few months. BL came back in full force, took mostly all days in the week and you know what? It surprised the hell out of me. Mostly because I was moving back and forth from the decision of whether to stop watching or to wait and trust something extraordinary would happen like last year. And then October/November happened before I knew it I was falling again for some storylines, I was excited again to analyse and talk about these shows, and also I was incredibly grateful for some of the messages I received from these shows, they educated me, humbled me and even pushed me to my own version of self-acceptance, learning and love. So there are some disappointments with some of the shows mentioned here, but overall I'm grateful we got to see these shows and wait for them every week to air. This is the first part of this list because in another two weeks I have more shows ending. December is shaking!

Ratings: From 1 to 5 (1 being least excited to watch, 5 being most,) how excited am I to delve into these shows?

DISMAYS

1. MY GEAR AND MY GOWN

Genre/Themes: Romance, Melodrama, Angst, Drama, Friendship, Unrequited Love, Family

Country: Thailand

Verdict:

 Um, this show. I've been through a lot with this show, I've been angry, frustrated, tired, annoyed but weirdly I love this show, by the end of the finale, this show left me with warmth and this energy of bliss and joy. I realised that the reason why I was so harsh to this show was because of the potential I saw when I first saw the first episode. I fell in love because I could tell it was symbolic, it was deep, and it also had interesting devices used to tell the plot. Who knew that the pacing and directing of this show would nearly leave me mad and furious because it could have been better. This is all on the director, and sometimes the actors, they weren't expressive enough, they weren't emotional enough, and they didn't entirely sell me on what they were meant to be feeling. Sometimes it felt awkward and stiff and unbelievable, and at those times, I felt disappointed and bored. But the characters of this show and especially some actors (FIAT and JJ) really stole my heart without me wanting them to. I fell in love with the couples, I loved analysing them and feeling their angst and understanding their character dynamics. I lived for their friendship and enjoyed watching how it all came together. Even some of the romantic scenes made me swoon and excited, and I was just so happy to watch these couples choose each other.

I also think the relationship dynamics, whilst sometimes annoying, was actually sweet and wholesome. Itt and Pai's love is so cute and memorable, and I understood why they wanted each other, they both helped each other so much, and I thought it was beautiful. Pure and Folk; everything, no words, they were incredible despite rushed and late, I enjoyed watching their love on my screen, and it left me so disappointed that we could have had more if the pacing was done right. Either way, despite the rants and criticisms this show was a gem to me, one of my favourites just because of the couple dynamics. I will miss it, and I will miss analysing it. But please NEW sort your self out, and stop with the slow pace directing; you're killing your shows, (just my opinion) but you're making me dread the shows I've been so excited for in 2021, and I really pray you won't ruin them. Nough said. 

Ratings:3.8/5 I can't rate it higher, but I do think it deserves credit, this show is very underrated as much as it annoyed me it's actually a decent show, it's very educational sometimes. It also has character development and growth. The romances are sweet and definitely should be paid attention to.

2. A CHANCE TO LOVE/ LOVE BY CHANCE SEASON 2

Genre/Themes: Comedy, Romance,  Drama, Friendship, Rich, poor dynamic, 

Country: Thailand

Verdict:

MGAYG was not the only show that New produced/ directed. There was this atrocity. No offence to everyone who loved this show, I love TinCan, I like most of the couples of the show, I didn't even complain when the show was rebooted, I didn't complain when there was not enough plot for the side couples for the first 8 episodes. But what annoys the hell out of me with this show is the lazy writing. I am so disappointed with this show, I realised that by the finale I was just tired and I was only watching it for some actors not even characters ( I was watching it to see a glimpse of Meen and Est), and it really made me sad. Because I started off with this show a bundle of joy, to see Tin and Can fall in love with each other again, I ignored when the haters said it was boring, awkward or stiff. I even accepted the massive amounts of product placement that was placed lazily and annoyingly. I was ready to forgive everything with this show. But I ended up feeling slighted, not me the actors should feel slighted, Cooheart, Mark Siwat, Gun, Title, Meen, Est should feel slighted by this show because this show wasted their potentials and only showed them for minutes in the whole 12 hours that this show aired for. I am so angry at the writer because she was lazy. She had clocked out when it came to this script (Though I don't blame her when everyone kept on sending her threats to how she told the previous story, she silenced her own creative ideas and muted everything, hence why Kengla and Techno's story was destroyed and became lazy and not needed and confusing, and Tum and Tar and Keen made no sense). Mame had given up on this show long before it aired. 

But as much as I am disappointed at her for doing so, I also have to take this back to New, he's the person again who ruined this show with his pacing and directing. I love New, but this year it wasn't it, he is the main flaw in both his shows, he doesn't know when to pace things properly, he rushes plots at the end, and he doesn't give enough time to side couples for them to make sense. He did well in season 1 I think, but this season was atrocious. I am heavily disappointed, and I want to forget this show exists. I do have to give credit to Mean because I think he carried the show, I think Plan was cute but he was uncomfortable, and he ruined a lot of moments for me despite how much I love his chemistry with Mean. So yeh LBC was a disappointment, but it still holds a special place in my heart because I did care about the cast (maybe not as much anymore because of their homophobia) but LBC was one of my first loved BLs to see such a disappointing follow up is just heartbreaking. 

Ratings:2.9/5 I couldn't bring my self to rate it even a three because I genuinely don't want to rewatch or think about this show again that's a pity because I genuinely love TinCan and MeenEst. But hey ho, c'est la vie. 

RELIEFS

Gaya Sa Pelikula

Genre/Themes: Romance, Drama, Comedy, Angst, LGBTQ+ Education, Contract relationship, Haters to lovers

Country: Philippines 

Verdict:  We finally reached the end. And the way I didn't want this show to end, is just too much. I completed this show on the floor sobbing, clenching my heart and just reflecting and thinking about everything. One I was in shock, wasn't expecting something like this when I first watched this show. I had a lot of doubts despite the sneaky light in my heart from the comedy and energy and charisma from the show. I fell. Hard. For everything. Before I knew it, Fridays meant everything to me, if I could get to keep watching this show, it made laugh, smile, cry, weep, and it made me think and learn. It's weird how a show can mean so much to people, this show wasn't for me, it was a love letter to the LGBTQ+ community, a beautiful one, and with everybody's reaction, I think I can say for all of us, that this show was a masterpiece. It had everything, a plot that was so deep, interesting and unique, characters that felt real, understandable and relatable, lessons that made everyone think and question how they acted, how they viewed things, what we say, how we consider our selves, what is our story that we want to tell to the world?

 It's just incredible, not only that this show had terrific production, directing, acting and music that will stick with me for a long time. The music was perfectly used, perfectly mixed in, and it touched everyone's heart. This show left me feeling healed, it was weird, I don't know how to relate to the struggles of Internalised homophobia, but I get anxiety, I get feeling like you're not the main character in your story, I get feeling like your life was already planned out and your dreams don't matter, I get hiding and running away from the world and finding a place to stay in your head and find peace and I get feeling overlooked and misunderstood. Overall I get the fight for self healing, acceptance and love. And Vlad and Karl went through that, and it was so beautiful to see them grow and become what they wanted to be, even if they couldn't be together because of that. Everything including the side characters in this show meant something, each had their own story, flaws and importance for why they were there, and I loved it. Words can't explain how good this show is, and the fact that no one came into it,  knowing anything is just such inspirational and hopeful thing, out there, there are content and stories to consume that can teach and affect you and make you want to do something with your own. And Gaya Sa pelikula was one of those for me. I don't wanna say Goodbye, and hopefully, we get to see them again soon. 

Ratings: 5/5 I would give this more than 5 if I could. That's how much this show means to me. 

4. I TOLD SUNSET ABOUT YOU/ TRANSLATE MY LOVE WITH YOUR HEART

Genre/Themes: Romance, Melodrama, Coming of Age, Angst, Drama, Childhood friendship

Country: Thailand

Verdict: Wow. All I can say is wow. I find my self not able to talk about this show, because like what else can I say that everyone hasn't said. It's outstanding. No words. I think this show was just out of nowhere, I mean probably not; because it was a Nadao production but still, for a BL? Out of nowhere. The effort, the acting, the music, the production, the themes and the way it was all so perfectly told? It was a journey, I ended up at times also on the floor sobbing, shouting and just like feeling so single. Haha. But really this show is ridiculously good, it's like something that can't be fully explained, it's still a shock to me (and I really need to start believing in potentials of BLs more), it is, I'm just thankful I guess, for the 5 hours spent with this show, the number of essays derived from this show, the way Teh and Oh snuck in my heart and refused to leave. I think we all want a love like Teh and Oh, someone who completely takes your breath away, is selfless for you and is your number one supporter and fan. Someone who the room spins around for and your world only focuses on, someone who makes you brave.

And I think Teh and Oh found that with each other, and it was beautiful to witness, it was heartbreaking as well to see them struggle with it, it was also peaceful to reach the end and see them safe and secure with each other. ITSAY was everything, it also means a lot to me because the writing and directing are effortless, it's inspiring and beautiful to see how it came about, its so fulfilling to see how much effort went into this production. And I can't wait to see how Part 2 unfolds next year. I will say that with all the angst and longing, the ending did feel unsatisfactory because I just felt that all the tension and emotion invested just became really tame at the end, all the angst just fell apart so rapidly, and it felt weird that it ended in a hug? But with all the theories about sad endings and the other directions the writer could have gone with I'm happy it was a happy ending, and I'm delighted our boys reunited and became each other's most immense success/happiness. 

Ratings: 4.5/5  Yeh I want to give it a 5/5 but the ending like I said felt a little bit empty for me, I didn't feel satisfied or like complete but that's because there's a part 2 coming. Still is the best Thai BL ever created. And it deserves all the praise.

November was a ride, I think I've cried so much during these past weeks, but honestly, I'm so glad BLs are just improving and putting more effort in, BLs are no longer just for fujoshis to consume. Still, now they represent and educate about LGBTQ+ experiences, they feel relatable and understandable. They're not as toxic as before. We're getting healthier relationships, we're getting depth and unique plots, we're getting happy endings as well. It's very lovely to see the growth, and I can't wait to see what December brings or next year. I'm just so proud of these actors, I'm proud of actors who actually respect this genre and understands why people like it, for me I really enjoy learning about things I never thought or experienced, it humbles me, and it inspires me so much. I'm grateful for these shows. Hopefully, there's many more like ITSAY and GSP to come. Please. 

[redantsunderneath]

DC COMICS: Incoherence as Not-a-Bug-but-a-Feature (Spoilers for Batman 89-100)

Due to the emergence of the new Batman villain character Punchline, I wound up buying the last 12 issues of Batman and reading them in a single sitting. I’ve had trouble following DC comics for a while, constantly feeling that they were in trouble since back in the mid 2000s (with a glimmer of hope here and there). The act of reading DC comics has been a frustrating experience, where individual good stories and runs were laying around in the context of a lot of things that didn’t make sense while the company’s thrust felt chaotic and ideas not well blended. Every status quo change seemed hard to figure out the rules of enough to parse the context.  We’ll get into the background of this, but my reading today of this extended stretch of comics that keeps losing the plot in favor of a fever dream of what’s happening at the moment with specific characters that refuse to cohere, it became obvious that what I had been looking at as subtext or critique was actually the text. I could see the messed up trees but was missing the the forest the universe was trying to describe.

What happens in these issues (Batman current series 89-100, I missed the beginning of the first of 2 arcs) is rolling war between the major Batman villains and the heroes (plus Harley Quinn and Catwoman), which shifts into a Joker and Joker adjacent vs. all as the Joker double crosses everyone then manages to steal Bruce Wayne’s fortune.  We meet 3 new baddies – Underbroker, whose schtick is putting ill-gotten gains beyond the reach of the legal system (with an explicit line to rich globalists drawn), the Designer, who back in the day offered the four A list Batman villains plans to achieve what they most wanted, and Punchline, who is your toxic ex’s new millennial GF who really has it in for you (there is also a new good guy Clownhunter, which is a whole different thing, and a new costumed detective that predates Batman).  This doesn’t convey the chaotic nature of what is happening issue to issue, but there’s more than one Batman hallucinogenic spirit quest, dead characters ostensibly walking around, a plan revolving around the Bat’s origin story that tells some version of it several times, and a no-nonsense declaration that the Joker, as the Devil of the Batman spiritual system, cannot die.   The whole thing has the effect of convincing you there is no definitive sequence of events, only versions.

Alan Moore’s Killing Joke is not a favorite of mine, for a number of reasons.  But the ending holds up.  The Joker has done terrible things there is no antecedent for, and Batman wonders aloud if this never-ending dance they do ends in anything but both of their deaths; can they uncouple from the unhealthy duality the cycle of which simply repeats.  The Joker responds, well, with a joke about two lunatics trying to escape an asylum.  One jumps the roof to the next building, while the other is too scared to try.  The escapee offers to hold a light while the other crosses on a beam but he says no, no you’ll just cut the light while I’m half way across.  This not very funny joke nonetheless has a bunch of resonances – BM and Joker as conspiring co inmates, BM wanting to break out, a commentary about their natures (almost a reversal of the frog and scorpion story where the scorpion won’t go because he knows how this ends), but mostly it implicates BM as the one who is enabling the cycle, the reason why it won’t end.  They both laugh uproariously, and the ambiguous final panels can be read as the fundamental realization of his complicity causing BM to kill J.  A lethal joke indeed… except, next month, we see the both of them again.  In broader context, the ceaseless cycle of the diad is reaffirmed.  This has been hellaciously sticky as an idea in the Batmen universe.

My realization of what DC has been doing is pretty banal in its pieces. Marvel has “ground level” heroes while DC has a mythos, a pantheon.  Their archetypal makeup is strong, the seven JLA members lining up with the pantheon of Greek gods and the Chakras weirdly closely.  DC has big characters that are somewhat flat which they can use tell big bold individual stories that are cool the way legends and fables are cool. But these stories require bold strokes that a bit incompatible with each other. People get attached to these iterations. Meanwhile, Marvel trucks in soap operas where the characters give you an empathetic stand in and are narratively flexible. Marvel events are usually about the writer vs. the company, asking you to sympathize or deconstruct the creative impulse amid efforts to impose control or order.  DC’s events are about editorial vs. the audience, the shapers vs. the forces of the world.  It may seem obvious, given this description, that DC’s focus is on an archetypal tableau though it may be less obvious that this tableau is under extreme pressure from expectations when trying to tell ongoing tales month in, month out (or semi-monthly in some cases). The stories are constantly compared against the big stories that have gone before, and the audience’s ideas of the characters exert pressure to push them in directions that capture “the” version they believe in.  This circle is not possible to square.

DC and Marvel both have a multiverse of sorts.  DC used to tell “Elseworlds” stories which were later tucked into pocket universes.  DC invented crossing over between “realities.”  DC’s continuity is heavy baggage and they began to have “Crises” to resolve the narrative incompatibilities.  These only made things worse as you can’t get rid of the past people have a relationship with – it will come back.  Now you have to explain that away too.  Marvel just lets it lay – forget about the iffy stories, they count, sure, just no one is ever going to talk about them unless they have an angle.  Marvel continuity is all angles and amnesia. This is just easier to do with dating and rent and your ancient aunt’s medical bills than with Gods. Marvel’s multiverse is about sandboxes that you can always dump into the mainframe if they work (and never really mention the sandbox again).

There is a shift that occurred in the industry in the 2004 to 2005 era that is less remarked upon than many upheavals in comic’s history. Marvel had gone through a period of incredible new idea generation in the early 2000s after a late 90s creative cratering but had just fired the pro wrestling inflected soul of that moment (Bill Jemas).  DC was coming off of a period of trying to do moderately updated versions of what they basically been doing all along. The attitude was “yeah we’re under stress from the combined history of these characters, but we got to keep telling the stories.” Geoff Johns was one voice of DC over the 99-04 period that showed potential - he seemed to get how to find the core of characters and push them into a new in sync directions if they over the years have lost a clear identity.  But mostly he had internalized a basic schism between something mean that the audience wanted, and something good and wholesome about the characters themselves, and figured out how to mess around with this in a equilibrating fashion.

Interestingly, the ignition point of the main forces that were going to blow DC over the next decade and a half was a comic that had virtually nothing to do with any of those main forces. Brad Meltzer, a novelist, was hired to do a comic called Infinity Crisis, which sold extremely well and was, justifiably or not, recognized as an event.  At the same time, everyone also kind of hated it because the dark desires of some DC fans were pushed forward just a bit too much for comfort and for a comic with Crisis in the name it didn’t do a whole lot other than “darken” things.  Nonetheless, this lit an “event” fire at both companies.  Marvel chose a shake up the status quo for a year, then do it again, pattern and was off to the races (I have written about this, and more, here) while continuing its Randian framing of beleaguered do-gooders opposed by rule making freedom haters.

As this was playing out, Dan Didio quietly took power in DC Editorial.  His outlook was more Bloomian – he seemed to spark off of writers who exhibited anxiety of influence. He recognized Johns was the one person they had could be promoted into something of a universe architect, starting work on two key projects from which the rest would evolve. The first, was bringing back Hal Jordan as Green Lantern and diffracting the GL universe into its own symbolic system, with parts frisson-ing other parts, and almost a Magic the Gathering color scheme of ideas. The other was to build up to Infinite Crisis, which would become the model for most of their universe changing events until the present day.

The basic frame is this: DC heroes want to be good (in a sense of their inherent nature) but forces outside form a context that makes them fall.  It’s a very gnostic universe, DC.  They  examine reflections of the concepts, invent scapegoats for certain tendencies (see Superboy Prime as entitled fanboy, Dr. Manhattan as editors that try and fail to mend things, etc), make characters violate principles, rehabilitate them, then show that the world if anything is more broken than before.  This is kind of Johns’ thing and it fits Didio’s narrative as historicval tension fetish.  But then came Scott Snyder (not to be confused with Zack) who began to work on Batman in 2011.  Since then, as much as Justice League is pushed as the central title and Lex Luthor has been pimped, Batman has been the core of the universe and the Joker the core villain.

Snyder had the same continuity conflict wavelength but was significantly more meta and able to contain multitudes than Johns.  He was the first to make an explicit mystery of how there could be several Jokers around at one time (who are the same but not, he posited 3 – man, Christians!) that seems prescient given the near future coexistence of filmic Jokers that are not able to be resolved.  I believe he was the first to begin to tease out an idea – that different versions of things in comics are not a diffraction or filter effect, a using the set of things that work best for that story and leaving the rest, but are a matter of the archetypal system of the audience coming apart. From an in story perspective what appears to happen is that multiple versions of incompatible things exist in the collective unconscious of the continuing narrative, and this is something that the characters may become conscious of.  

The run I just read is written by James Tynion IV building on the above trends.  The trick seems to be going all in on the Jungian aspect (at Jung’s most religiously epiphanic).  The Designer was a progenitor and adversary to Batman’s predecessor and his intellectual approach eventually defeated the detective… broke him.  At some point in early Batman history, the Designer brought the top four Bat-baddies together and offered each, in turn, a plan to achieve what they most desired: the Riddler, a way to achieve an empire of the mind; the Penguin, power; and Catwoman, money.  They are all elated as they await the Joker to come out.  The Joker emerges with a furious Designer on his heals and promptly shoots him dead.  He explains that he didn’t like his joke in the form of a fable – the devil offered four people the path to their greatest desire: the three chose earthly things, but the Joker’s wish was to be him, to become the devil.  The story proceeds to suggest that the Joker just exists, he is present as a necessary component in the system.   You can kill him, yet he is alive.

DC has been using physics metaphors for the nature of their reality since Flash of Two Worlds in 1963.  The multiverse as a continuity concept was their idea and the holographic universe of the hypertime was a thing.  It seems like since Dan Didio took over, they’ve been heading towards a concept of broad superimposition, of measurement effect being weak, of the universe being like a quantum computer with all possibilities coexisting and the story instantiating not one reality but a path through all the possible ones.  By making Batman trip balls through quite a few issues and relive his origin from different angles, the story is one of its own instability and the heroic task that confronts our hero is attempting to actualize the world.  The Joker is the Devil in the sense of lack of fixed meaning, of relativistic chaos, of the world not making sense because it’s unmoored nature with ultimately no knowability.  Batman, in this story, functions as a postmodern knight crusading against the impossibility of epistemological grounding.

There’s more going on, sure.  One plot is, literally, defund Batman.  There is rioting, people brainwashed by being exposed to toxic ether, people paid to go to theaters even though they will die as a result, and questions about neoliberalism similar to that one Joker movie. Punchline has no personality yet (Tynion’s not the best at that) but she serves well as a generational foil for Harley – a rudderless ideological vacuum susceptible to Joker-as-idea-virus rather than an unfulfilled MD who felt alienated due to the structures of her life and was seeking escape into structureless possibility.  The Designer stuff is both continuity play (See why they changed from goofy villains to more “realistic” ones! Look how pulp heroes informed superheroes!), a comment on the nature of a longstanding narrative (strong intentions die out as Brownian motion overwhelms momentum), and a lawful evil/chaotic evil setup of the dualism of apocalypses (overdetermined authoritarian vs. center does not hold barbarism).  But the thing that ties this to the past decade and a half of DC is the sense that the reality is fluid and susceptible to change or outright s’cool incompatibility.

This is different than other flavors of meta in superhero comics.  Grant Morrison believes the archetypes are stronger than the forces that seek to bend them.  Alan Moore wants you to deconstruct your sacred cows and probably hates you personally.  Marvel might play with self-awareness, but effortlessly resolves inconsistencies after it’s finished playing.  DC, at this point, allows you to watch the waves solidfy into symbols and dissolve, and the constant confusion and lack of grounding is more of a choice then I thought this time yesterday.  The conflict theory of DC reality has been in full swing but this looks to be turning towards a kind of Zen historicism, holding contradictory things in your mind at once. Warren Ellis’ JLA/Authority book is the nearest comparable text I can think of. I need to call this, but I didn’t even talk about Death Metal, DC character multiplicity as meta-psychosis event extraordinaire.  Comics just keep getting weirder.

[gamewise]

Batman Review

What, you thought the NES was the only one to be graced with a Batman video game? Well, believe it or not, when Sunsoft’s name actually had some merit, they put out a few Batman games thanks to the movie license, and each one was a little different. The NES ran off with one of the best side scrolling license-based video games, the Game Boy got a decent side scroller, and the PC Engine got a... top down game where you literally clean up Gotham? That one is worth a review in itself, but we’re looking at the often overlooked Genesis game. Is this game really that bad that few people talk about it in Batman retrospectives? Absolutely not!

Sunsoft’s Batman on the NES is quite the crazy game, especially considering the liberties they took with the source material. What makes the NES game special outside of this was the attention to detail in the animation, the fantastic soundtrack, and the frantic action. Batman on the Genesis, is different. It takes a few liberties here and there, but moments you expect from the movie are here, such as the Boombox thug, Batman rescuing Vicki Vale, and also Batmobile and Batwing sequences. It’s doing things differently from the NES game by slowing things down a bit, and sticking a little closer to the source material. It’s doing a lot more different by changing up level designs completely to reflect locations featured in the movie, such as the Flugelheim Museum. As such, I find it unfair to compare it to the NES game versus style, as we’re dealing with two completely different fantastic beasts. Instead, we’re going to look at the Genesis version on its own merits, while discussing what the game is doing differently from the NES. 

So what does Batman have going for it? Well, for starters, much like the NES game, you play as Batman, and punch out The Joker’s henchmen. They’re not all unarmed, as you deal with thugs toting guns, bazookas, axes, and swords. There’s even some fire breathing clowns! Each enemy has its own unique pattern of attack, which requires the player to have a certain sense of timing. Much like the NES game, Batman can either punch his way through enemies, or toss Batarangs at them, and here’s the first deviation in gameplay. Batman does not have a ton of gadgets here, instead relying entirely on Batarangs for a ranged attack. Unlike the NES game, Batarangs do not arc back towards Batman, they go in a straight line like shurikens do. They are not just effective on dealing with certain enemies from a long distance, they are very useful on bosses to make your life a little easier. There is a catch to all this, and that’s Batarangs are few and far between, as are health powerups. It’s going to take a little more skill than the NES game to survive as Batman. Batman also has the ability to do a mid-air somersault, which when used correctly doubles as an attack that is insanely useful against bosses. Be careful though, if you don’t time this right, you will either miss completely, or take damage in the process. 

Compared to the NES game, which had punishing level design and boss fights, this game chooses to not only stick to those roots, but Sunsoft have chosen to turn things up a notch. See, Batman never starts at full health, instead, he always starts at half and with only 5 Batarangs. That’s right, for the first time, Batman didn’t have enough prep time to go against The Joker. This means that every time you die, you not only lose a life, but you’re back to half health, and 5 Batarangs. So those 30 Batarangs you went through the trouble of collecting will be gone completely. And believe me, you are going to be frustrated at times with the game’s insane level design, especially with the Flugelheim Museum and its amazing barrage of death traps. 

Not only do you have to deal with falling chandeliers, but there are numerous gaps just waiting for Batman to fall down. While it sounds unfair, there is a way to deal with every situation here, and that is to have a sense of patience. You’re not on a time limit, and all your gun-toting enemies aren’t going to fire non-stop. They need to steady their aim before firing, so you have a window of opportunity to react accordingly. Another thing you don’t have is a checkpoint system, but instead, you just respawn where you died, unless you fell to your demise. Should you lose all your lives, only then will you be forced to start a whole level over. What it boils down to is to study the screen, and watch how enemies attack. Take patience, and nail the timing, and you will be ready to take on almost anything the game throws at you. It may not solve all the difficulty issues though. When you get to the last level, the game throws gun-toting thugs at you non-stop, and they not only stand and shoot, but crouch and shoot. Make sure you have Batarangs handy for the situation, and you should be prepared to deal with it. What you won’t be prepared for are the two vehicle levels.

One of the complaints I had with the NES version of Batman when I was a kid, was no Batmobile level. Here, I get my wish, and in many ways, it’s both frustrating and enjoyable. For starters, there are no real power ups to collect here, instead you get standard health and ammo power ups that appear in both the top and bottom sections of the screen. Any Batarangs you collected up to this point are converted into missiles for the Batmobile and Batwing. The trouble is since the screen is scrolling fast and the health and ammo boxes are the same as regular levels, it is insanely easy to miss them, or even mistake them for an obstacle. This is also the only point in the game you will have a checkpoint system to deal with, but what makes this part more frustrating is that all enemy attacks will do two damage as opposed to one. Which means, you will die in two hits unless you are at full health. The Batwing sequence turns the difficulty up to eleven, as suddenly it turns into a bullet hell with heat-seekers coming every which way. In the Batmobile sequence, you can easily predict where projectiles are going to go, and have plenty of time to react accordingly. Yet despite this, as I played, I began to get a sense of a horribly unbalanced difficulty. I found myself dying too easy

On the NES Batman had an aesthetic of using dark backgrounds with brightly colored sprites and platforms, giving off an almost comic-book feel. Here, the game wants to match the movie’s aesthetic, and the Genesis seemed to have the right color palette for Sunsoft’s goal. More importantly, there is a lot of attention to detail in the animations. The fact that Sunsoft decided that no animation should be spared is incredible, especially for something as simple as a thug steadying his aim. Only thing I’d maybe consider taking away is Batman’s haters gonna hate stride, it looks kind of goofy when you see him striding down the streets of Gotham. Also, I can’t stress this enough, much like the NES game, the audio is phenomenal. Just listening to the soundtrack, you’d almost forget you were playing a Genesis game, since most people associate the Genesis sound chip with nails on a chalkboard. The Flugelheim Museum has a great bassline, and the Batmobile and Batwing levels have the perfect high energy music for a shmup. However, it’s a little disappointing the sound effects department. Everything sounds just a little too quiet, save for Batman taking damage. Everything’s either muffled, or the music winds up taking over the whole show. 

At the end of the day, Batman on the Sega Genesis is one criminally overlooked licensed game. While it can’t quite reach the same heights as its NES counterpart, there are things here the Genesis game does differently to allow it to stand on its own two legs. Had it not been for the unbalanced difficulty, this game would be a bit more enjoyable, but to the uninitiated, this game may feel like nonstop torture. Sunsoft did a solid job here, putting forth the best Batman game they could on the Genesis, and choosing to stick closer to the 1989 film classic. I wouldn’t want to imagine this in anybody else’s hands at the time. Batman on the Sega Genesis needs to be brought up more when discussing early Batman games as an example of what happens when a developer ends up delivering a different experience each platform.

Positives

+ Memorable soundtrack

+ Detailed Sprite animation

+ Batmobile level becomes fun when you get the hang of it

+ Does a great job following the movie

+ Death respawns you where you died rather than forced to a checkpoint as Batman

+ the parallax scrolling in the Batwing level is beautiful!

Negatives

- Unbalanced difficulty may leave you frustrated

- Batwing level does everything in its power to kill you

- Flugelheim Museum has too many death traps

- Underwhelming sound effects end up making the game feel less punchy

- Batman’s walk cycle

Overall: 8/10

[halothenthehorns]

TLTNL- PERCY AND PADFOOT

Lily did not take the book with any amount of happiness. She couldn't stand the idea of just casually going on about Harry's life while that tyrant was torturing her son on a weekly basis now. The only remote bright spot she could picture was the end of the year where hopefully she'd sustain something far worse than having to leave the job. She took the book from Remus very grudgingly and trudged back to her spot next to James in a heavy silence, only Harry still seemed anxious to try and pretend like that part of his life was no big deal.

Harry was first to wake up in his dormitory next morning.

"That's a surprise," Remus said conversationally enough, he could still be angry and keep things light for Harry's sake. "I'd think you'd have to be dragged out of bed with all your sleepless nights from before."

"Guess my brain was still wired for school," Harry shrugged with a smile at him for the attempt.

He lay in his bed and savored for a moment it was finally Saturday, the first week had dragged on as if one long History of Magic class.

"Gah, can you imagine the horror," Sirius shuddered.

"Sounds nice actually," James snorted, "one nice long week to nap."

He collected himself and went down into the dormitory with his school bag, finding it much tidier than when he'd went to bed amongst the candy wrappers and loose scraps of parchment, along with Hermione's hats. He only vaguely wondered how many house-elves had been set free whether they wanted to be or not. *

"Really Harry? You didn't realize the problem with Hermione's plan? You were the one who had to trick Dobby into getting that sock instead of just giving it to him yourself," Lily frowned at him in confusion.

"I honestly thought Hermione had found a way around that, and hadn't questioned her. Thought she really knew what she was doing," Harry shrugged.

"Well it's nice to know she's not infallible in her logic sometimes I guess," James snorted.

  Harry uncorked a bottle of ink and stretched out a fresh sheet of parchment, but hesitated over what to put down, suddenly appreciating his friends vague letters over the summer.

They all perked up with interest at that, they'd been assuming Harry had just been fixing to start on some homework or some such, but this was even better! Sirius was full blown smiling now that Harry really was going to write to him about anything!

He wanted to write to Sirius about everything that had been going on this week, but not in so many words anyone would know what he was talking about. But how to do so without anyone else knowing?

"Very carefully," Remus smiled.

"Or you could charm it so that it only shows you the words when you give it a very vague command," James grinned.

Harry looked a bit disappointed he'd never thought of that, he really wished he had asked his Marauders how they'd charmed their map to do that.

Finally he began with dear Snuffles, and began with a pleasant enough greeting before going into detail about the new Defense teacher, who was about as nice as Snuffles' mum.

Sirius snorted violently before full blown laughing. Then he couldn't seem to stop for a moment. Lily looked on at him with a touch of concern for this reaction, Umbridge's horrid ways set her mind racing with every foul spell she knew to use on that woman for what she'd done to Harry. Just what on earth had Walburga Black done to Sirius for him to clearly be agreeing with Harry like this? She longed to ask, but respected it was his right to tell her if he ever wanted to.

Harry then got to the point, saying he was sending along this letter because what had happened two summers ago happened the other night in detention with Umbridge.

"That was incredibly vague," Remus beamed with pride.

"So, goal met then?" Harry smiled sheepishly, he'd been a little worried they were all going to tell him off for contacting Sirius considering how worried they'd all been about him joining him at the train.

"Absolutely," James nodded, "you're already a natural at this."

They were all missing their biggest friend and hoped to hear from him soon,

"That was a little on the nose," Lily giggled.

"Still credit for trying," Sirius chuckled.

then he signed off. He reread this letter several times, trying his best to find a hole an outsider could find, but he was sure no one could detect anything about the contents or certainly who it was meant for.

"Definitely not, you're safe on all counts," they all agreed, causing Harry his first real smile since he'd been back at school.

Harry hoped Sirius would pick up most of all on the mention of Hagrid, but did not want to ask directly in case it drew attention to his absence.

"I'm sure he'll be back in no time," Lily said with more confidence than she really felt. She was very worried about Hagrid as well, what was taking him so long?

Considering how short the letter was, it had taken him some time to do it. By now others were arriving downstairs, and Harry hastened out of the common room off for the Owlery. He ran into Nick on the way, warning him against going his current path as Peeves was planning a joke involved the bust of Paracelsus.

Harry asked if this involved the bust falling on his head?

"A classic then," James smirked.

Nick agreed in a bored voice that was the funny part.

"How on earth could he be bored by such a thing?" Remus drawled.

Pointing out subtlety had never been Peeves' strong point.

"Well that's fair enough," Sirius agreed.

Nick was off to find the Barron to put a stop to this, and he'd see Harry around.

"Merlin, doesn't anyone let people have some fun in that place," James sighed.

Harry ended up taking a longer but safer route up to the Owlery, and only came across Mrs. Norris. The cat gazed at him for a moment before darting off, Harry calling after her he hadn't done anything wrong, though the hike of her tail was one of going to fetch her boss.

"Maybe she was just mad you stopped her heading that way as well," Sirius snorted, "I've caught her a fair few times trying to go up there pestering the owls."

Ignoring the instance he found the straw strewn floor covered with the usual owl droppings and regurgitated meals, spotting his snowy white owl up in the rafters. Once she'd perched on his shoulder so he could tie his note to her, he instructed for her ears alone that though this was addressed to Snuffles, Harry urged his owl to find Sirius.

"You didn't bother calling me that last year, why start now?" Sirius chuckled.

"Now I actually felt the need for it," Harry muttered, shifting just a bit with unease as the safety of his godfather came into question.

She gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze before taking flight, and Harry watched her fly off with the most calm he'd felt in a while. The grounds were still and at peace in the morning light, the trees of the Forbidden Forest only swaying gently. It was as he gazed at these though that one of the skeletal horses from before came swooping out chasing a bird and when it missed, dived right back down out of sight. The whole instance happened so quickly Harry swore he could have imagined it.

"Can you imagine how many times that happens a day and no one sees it," Sirius looked a bit amused.

"Imagine if they roamed the grounds more than the forest," James agreed. "People would be constantly knocking into them, and seeing things happen because of those and no one would be able to figure out why except those that saw them."

"You lot are enjoying this idea far too much," Lily tried to repress a smile at the idea by telling them.

"What can we say, we have a certain fondness for invisibility," Remus smirked.

The Owlery door opened behind him. He leapt in shock and, turning quickly, saw Cho Chang holding a letter and a parcel in her hands.

"Hey, look who finally gets a moment alone with his crush," Sirius threw his hands up in victory.

"I don't find the owlery the most romantic setting," James smirked.

"Let's see if Harry can get through with this one without making a fool of himself," Remus snickered, "or this time it'll be entirely his fault."

"Your encouragement is the limit," Harry grumbled.

They both stammered a greeting to each other at once, Cho quickly explaining her end she was coming up here to deliver a birthday present to her mum.

Harry couldn't think of anything to say to that, his brain had jammed. He wanted to say something funny and interesting,

"Harry, you have yet to say that, ever," Sirius smirked, achieving his goal in getting a rise out of Harry who simply scowled at him for now.

but the memory of that horse now fresh had his mind struggling speech at all.

What came out was a gesture to the clear blue sky, and his pointing out how nice this was. Then he felt like crawling under the nearest rat skeleton and never coming out. He was talking about the weather!

"Considering you've never had a proper conversation, starting casual is probably best," James said fairly.

"Could have asked something more direct, like what she'd gotten her mother," Lily objected.

"Or I could go read this in another room without you lot," Harry huffed to try and get them to stop.

"You wouldn't dare," Sirius gasped.

"And miss out on our brilliant commentary?" Remus looked a touch offended.

Lily started giggling a bit when Harry didn't back down from his threat as she turned back anyways.

Cho at once agreed this made perfect Quidditch conditions.

"Well I like her," James beamed at once.

"A very good point she managed to steer right into that sport," Sirius agreed, which Harry supposed was better than them picking on him, so he let it go.

Then she asked if Gryffindor had a new Keeper yet?

Harry agreed it was his friend Ron, whom Cho remembered as the Tornado hater.

"I'm sure he doesn't hate the team," Remus said fairly, "just the fans who suddenly like them."

"Entirely not the point," Lily rolled her eyes at him.

She asked how his tryout had gone, and Harry confessed he hadn't been there because of his detention.

Cho met his eyes then, only half way done attaching her parcel to her owl, as she stated how foul that Umbridge woman was, putting him in detention for telling the truth about...of how he died.

"Oh look, another supporter," Sirius said quickly rather than letting Harry dwell on that again for a moment, "that's three to two."

"Are you going to keep a tally of everyone in the school?" Harry asked with some bemusement.

"Don't tempt him," James sighed.

"He's already not doing a good job anyways, it's five to two counting Ron and Hermione," Remus reminded.

"Those were given," Sirius brushed him off.

"Not if you're going to do a complete poll of all 500 something students-"** Remus began disagreeing, but Lily finally cut through the lot of them.

She kept Harry's eyes as she told how brave it was of him to stand up to her like that.

Harry felt his insides inflating so much he was sure he was suddenly floating off the ground a bit.

"That'd be a sight," James snickered at the idea.

Who cared about a stupid flying horse; Cho thought he'd been brave.

"Priorities," Remus agreed lightly.

For a moment, he considered accidentally-on-purpose showing her his cut hand as he helped her tie her parcel on to her owl . . .

"I'm not sure of the reaction you were hoping to get with that one," Lily said in disgust.

"I certainly wouldn't find that braver, but stupid on your part for not saying something about it before now," James agreed with a hard look at Harry who chose now to check to see if his shoelace was still tied.

Before he could act on the impulse, the door burst open, with Filch marching into the room on a mission. He locked eyes on Harry at once and demanded his mail from him, saying he'd been given a tip about the order of Dungbombs he was to be placing.

Lily puffed up her cheeks before letting the air out slowly to make sure her voice came out neutral as she asked, "why would he think that?"

"Maybe it was someone playing a prank?" Harry brushed off, not wanting to think much of it as he was still caught on his Cho interactions with a smile.

"Harry, you don't find it just a bit concerning someone was trying to take your mail from you?" Remus wheedled to try and keep him on track while everyone's eyes were still narrowed with dislike over this.

Harry did rethink things over, and he certainly felt a ball of anxiety forming in him at the thought now, but he was finally enjoying just a bit of his time remembering school again and don't want them to keep ruining it with suspicions, so he just shrugged again.

Lily hoped that meant nothing did come of this moment, rather than worrying at her lip for the implications of something she did not like.

Harry crossed his arms in defiance at once as he demanded who'd told that, and Filch just brushed him off saying that wasn't the point and to hand over his mail now. Harry was entirely grateful he hadn't dawdled in sending Hedwig off, as he told Filch as much.

His eyes narrowed with further suspicion, as he demanded if Harry still had it on his person in hiding.

"What's he going to do if you had?" James snorted, his old joy of tormenting Filch quickly rising to the top.

"Surely, it'll involve whipping or something," Sirius snickered, "that'll make the clothes come right off."

"Urgh," Lily grumbled, she'd never taken Filch's threats so lightly as the lot of them, but then she supposed, she'd never had to suffer a detention with him either so she could see why they played this off as a joke.

Cho jumped in then saying she'd been here when he did send it off.

"Are you sure she's not a Keeper?" James threw his head back with laughter, "because I think she is."

"And you say I come up with bad puns," Sirius snickered along.

Filch glared between the two before turning back to the door, but he froze with his hand on it and still angry eyes on Harry as he began to threaten if he got one whiff of a Dungbomb from him...

"You'll what? Come on man, finish your threats, it's far healthier," Remus said almost encouragingly.

He stomped out of sight then, Harry waiting till he was long gone before thanking Cho for backing him up. She said she didn't mind at all, before asking if he really had been up here ordering those?

"She asks after defending you," Lily giggled.

"Proper timing," James agreed.

Harry said no, and she at once went on to say why Filch had thought so then.

The two remained in silence then as Cho finally sent off her things and they left, waiting until they hit their departing corridor before Cho said she'd see Harry around.

He agreed at once, and the two departed both smiling.

"Lookie there, finally making some progress," Sirius couldn't quite keep the mocking tone out of his voice even as he applauded Harry.

"Looks like third time's his charm, he's beaten Prongs out by a mile," Remus agreed.

"Come on, 394 really isn't that bad in comparison," Sirius put on James' voice in a fair impression.

James chucked a pillow at him while Lily kept going.

Harry went all the way down to the Great Hall, for once ignoring any lingering stares or whispers as he kept remembering her saying how brave she thought he was...

He greeted his friends with the cheeriest morning he had all week.

"Is that all it takes putting you in a good mood?" James huffed, still giving his two friends the stink eye. "Chatting with a pretty girl? Maybe we should try and convince Andromeda to come over next time you're in a bad mood."

"I don't think the prelude to that conversation would be worth it," Harry rolled his eyes.

Ron eyed Harry with surprise for this mood.

"It's sad he's surprised to see you happy," Sirius snorted.

Harry fibbed it was the idea of Quidditch, which Ron only reluctantly agreed to, as he asked Harry if he'd go out with him even earlier than practice so that Ron could have a warm up before even then.

"He wants to train before training, Merlin I want to cry just thinking about it," Remus groaned.

"Don't know what you're talking about Moony, I'll take some hits with the ground over the pummeling my brain took over homework," Sirius shrugged.

Harry agreed at once, but Hermione cut in she seriously didn't think they should.

"I would never say any such thing, why would Hermione imply otherwise?" Sirius demanded while Harry chuckled fully again at that joke.

They were both really behind on homework as is- the two boys were thankfully saved anymore by the morning owl arriving, and Ron tried to delay further by asking if there was anything interesting in there.

"I'm sure the removal of Fudge from his Minister position wouldn't keep her from talking about that," James rolled his eyes.

She flipped through a few pages while saying there was nothing of note, before reaching a ways into it and whispering a sudden concern for Sirius.

Lily choked hard as she spat the name out in surprise, and James wasn't going to sit around and wait for her to get her breath back as he lunged forward and took the book away from her, reading out in a fevered haste-

Harry moved so fast he tore the paper in half, leaving the piece Hermione had been reading still in her hand, which she practically ignored as she read out the content for the boys that the Ministry had received a tip-off that notorious mass murderer Sirius Black may be here in London.

His face was going red, he had yet to take a breath, so Lily reached forward and placed her hand on the back of his neck, using as calm a voice as she could manage, "breath James, he's still fine."

"Right, yeah," he said jerkily, some normal color returning to his face as he studied the words and then glared up at his best mate.

To his infuriation, Sirius just shrugged with a bland look in place, saying, "look at it this way Prongs, even if I do, I'll know how not to get caught that way."

Remus' hands twitched, he really was going to start strangling him here in a moment if he didn't stop playing this off as a joke.

"Sirius, this really isn't the time for jokes," Harry stunned them all by snapping, his face bone white as he watched him. "How do you think I'll feel when-" his vision blurred white before he could say anymore, beginning to convulse and clearly suffering for trying to remember something.

Even beginning to guess what that could be had all of them breathless with fear, but Sirius rounded himself back enough, talking earnestly but softly to Harry now, "alright pup, you got it. No more making fun of Prongs no matter how dramatic he's being."

Harry's vision swam as he focused back on Sirius, something dark in him warning he didn't want to remember the warning he'd almost given. He believed that feeling, because the first option it meant just couldn't be true, he couldn't lose Sirius. So, it must be something else, Sirius just got really hurt or something...

It was the only conclusion any of them could comprehend, the alternative wasn't bearable. Lily had to gently pry the book from James' death grip as she went back to her spot, ignoring her own shaking voice for that heart stopping moment.

Harry began muttering furiously about how Lucius must have done this, he had seen Sirius at the platform.

Ron began in surprise when this had happened,

Remus forced himself to roll his eyes, to focus on this detail that Ron really hadn't noticed any such thing.

Sirius was also restraining himself from saying he didn't even blame Ron for not focusing on such a stupid little detail, but he didn't think that would be well received right now considering his last throwaway comment.

but the other two shushed him as Hermione read out the rest of the article about what would await him when he was found. She concluded then that he just couldn't leave the house again period,

Sirius turned as white as Harry had just been. If that rat was never caught...he couldn't do it, he couldn't go back to prison again, one that was somehow conceivably on par with Azkaban...

Dumbledore had warned him not to after all.

"I don't give a damn what Dumbledore said," Sirius snarled with absolute conviction. "I'd rather die outside that house than be a prisoner inside it again."

He crossed his arms defiantly, waiting for someone to argue with him, but not even Harry could bolster himself to do this. If he'd had to go back to living at the Dursley's full time, even for his own safety...he'd be doing something desperate as well.

Harry stared morosely down at the bit of paper he'd ripped off, his mind on other things besides the add for Madam Malkin's in his hand, but then tucked in a miniature article right below that was something else that caught Harry's attention.

"Not more on-" Remus pleaded, having to resist the urge to grab Sirius and not let go until those thoughts of his were no longer an issue.

"No, no," Harry murmured, still not back to his normal color, "something other than Sirius caught my attention, if you can imagine."

Sirius managed a giggle that didn't quite hit normal, but if Harry was forcing himself to move past the moment than clearly, they'd over read his reaction, something else must be going on...not that Harry just couldn't bear to understand his own thought, that wasn't an option.

He at once laid this out for the others to see, to which Ron instantly said he was good on robes.

James managed only a semi hysterical giggle for that.

Harry ignored him and read out the bit that was barely four sentences long about how Sturgis Podmore had been arrested for trespassing at the Ministry. He'd been caught trying to break into a high security door. The man had refused to speak in his own defense and was to spend the next six months in Azkaban.

No one spoke while Lily read out the charges, but by the time she'd finished and looked up in stunned disbelief, she found them all slack jawed. What they were hearing wasn't possible. Not the Sturgis who'd just been inducted into the Order, had gone to Dumbledore and begged the man to let him help in any way possible after he'd witnessed a muggle child beaten in the street. So how on Earth had he somehow managed to get himself tangled up into stealing from the Ministry? Sent to Azkaban? Why had he even wound up there, that bit about refusing to speak for himself stuck out more than anything, as surely Dumbledore would have stepped in. If he had for Harry than they couldn't imagine he wouldn't have for a faithful Order member as well...but then again, they also already knew of at least one instance where he'd let an Order member go to Azkaban without speaking a word for him. If he could do that to Sirius, they'd believe he could do that to anyone.

Harry was less following that train of thought and more trying to understand how someone from the Order had done that, but his first thought was a frame up. The man had been conned into it somehow... then he went cross-eyed in pain. He'd already suffered one memory blast a second ago for something far more precious to him regarding his godfather, he wasn't going to be pressing on this.

Lily was still waiting for someone to say something about this, but it was clear no one really could, this was too much happening back to back and they needed a minute to process, so Lily was hoping reading about Harry go through this would help.

Ron recalled him as a recently absent member of the Order-

Hermione quickly shushed him before he could go on about that, while Harry hissed he'd been given his stint just for trying to get through a door?

"Oh, that part wasn't so surprising," Lily murmured, "the Ministry takes their breaking and entering very-" she broke off with a nasty glare at Sirius, who managed a real smile and almost a pout for Lily not slipping up.

Hermione told him not to be silly, it wasn't just because of the door. What had he even been doing at the ministry at the time?

"I'm sure if they knew they'd put that in the story," Remus frowned.

"Maybe not," James disagreed, "could be something very secret and important, don't want word spreading around about it."

Ron muttered if this happened on orders from the Order?

"I, could be I guess," Sirius struggled, though he really had a problem understanding what the Order would have to do with the Ministry when they were so at odds.

"If so, then him being in Azkaban is all the fouler," James snarled in outrage.

Harry recalled that it didn't seem likely, as Sturgis had been absent when they were all headed to King's cross, he didn't seem to be doing much work for them lately.

"Perhaps he just wasn't doing this at that time, I'm positive he came around and explained himself before going on for more work," Remus reasoned out.

Ron instead offered up the idea it was all a frame up. What if the Ministry had lured him there, and then set a trap for him to get caught so they could pin this on him.

They all considered the idea for a moment, but not everyone was entirely convinced. Lily at least hoped the Ministry would never fall that far, but she still also held out hope there was something else going on they just couldn't get information from that about. Harry also wouldn't know, leaving them in the dark on this.

James and Sirius seemed to liken to the idea, in fact it explained a lot of his past behavior if he was now regularly being conned up there and then didn't explain this until after the fact to the Order for security reasons.

Remus found it plausible enough, though still a bit too underhanded for the Ministry at this stage. From all accounts, they were still working on discrediting Dumbledore, and though making one of his associates into this light was a next step, why make the piece so small then? They'd have made this front headline news if they were pushing for this tactic, yet it seemed a miracle the piece was in the paper at all. No, he still thought something else was going on here.

Harry found this too far fetched, but Hermione was impressed at this and found it plausible.

Then she folded the paper up and moved on to saying they should start with their Herbology homework.

"How on Earth does she flip from that to homework?" Remus demanded, absolutely derailed from his train of thought.

"I'm sure Hermione can manage to switch any topic to essays," James scowled for this subject being brought up and then cut off so quickly, he wanted to know what was really going on with someone he considered a friend.

If they were lucky they could start practicing McGonagall's Inanimate Conjures Spells before lunch.

Sirius tisked at once, caught at once from his own speculation. "Don't know what she's on about, they're going to play Quidditch."

Harry felt a small twinge of guilt as he watched her go through their list of work, but that blue sky outside really was exhilarating, and he hadn't been on his Firebolt in ages...

"So, you'll be heading down to the pitch soon," Sirius waved impatiently to get there.

Ron reassured Harry that they could go through all that tonight, while the two headed down brooms over their shoulders, Hermione's dire words about how they were going to fail every one of their OWL's still fresh in their ears.

Remus started snickering while nobody bothered acting surprised, even if Lily's mouth did thin just a bit in disapproval of this.

Plus they had all day tomorrow...then he asked if she'd really meant it about them not being allowed to copy from her?

"Did she ever actually let you?" Lily asked astounded, as she hadn't at all picked up on this.

"Sometimes she 'accidentally' left her work out while she ran off to the Library for something," Harry chuckled, "but she never just pushed it over for us."

Harry said she'd meant it alright, but Quidditch was important to them to, they had to stay on top for the team.

"Priorities," James agreed without a drop of sarcasm.

Ron agreed at once, they had time to do it all.

"I hope you remember that when you're up studying until Sunday," Remus winced in pity at the idea.

Harry refused to let his gaze linger on the Forest as they took to the grounds, that flying horse wasn't hurting anything and he had more important things to think about.

"That's fair honestly," James agreed, he hated lingering on things that weren't of importance as well, though he was still trying to pick apart that bit about Sturgis even while half listening to his sons Quidditch prows.

Ron did quite well on his solo practice with Harry, and both boys were heartened as they returned to lunch and more of Hermione's commentary on how irresponsible they were.

"I'd be more worried if she didn't honestly," Lily said fondly.

This time when they went back down, everyone else was waiting for them in the locker room, Fred and George greeting Ron by asking if the Ickle Prefect was going to show them all up.

"If they were making cracks at him like that, it's no wonder he got a little frazzled during tryouts," Remus said in sympathy.

"Ron really shouldn't be letting those light things get to him," James scoffed in disbelief, "not only have the twins said far worse to him before, but the buildup to a game is brutal. Ron's got to have better nerves to keep up."

Ron snapped at them to shut up as Angelina entered, warning them before they got started that they had some visitors in the stands but they were to be ignored while they did this.

It was easier said than done, as the moment the Slytherin team caught sight of them, they began catcalling.

"Did we ever establish what the rules are for spectators at practice?" Harry grumped.

"Nope," James popped the p for emphasis. "Sadly, the pitch stands are open at all times, they hardly have a guard up after all. If you call off practice to go find a teacher to complain to, then you get the same end results of having practice cut up and your time will run out for the next person anyways."

Harry grumbled something but admitted he could do nothing more about this.

Malfoy at once began a list of insults, starting with what Weasley was riding, an old log?

Harry told Ron to ignore the jab, they wouldn't be laughing when they were the ones losing next game.

'Says the one on the Firebolt,' Remus thought in sympathy for Ron at that comment.

Angelina had them all in the air and began with the simple practice of tossing the Quaffle around. Each team member had lobbed it to a random other, before Harry passed it to Ron, who fumbled and had to dive to the ground to get it.

The Slytherin's laughter doubled up at once, and Ron came up as red faced as the ball now. The twins exchanged a look, but uncharacteristically did not say anything themselves.

"It's nice even they have their limits," Sirius frowned in sympathy for Ron.

"I'm positive they'd never have a go at their brother in front of spectators," James said at once, "family boundaries and all that. They can pick on him all they like, but if someone else does it, then there's going to be a problem. Mocking him while they are being the opposite of that."

Sirius nodded in absolute agreement while Lily grinned at him before going on.

Angelina brushed past the moment as if it hadn't happened, telling him to pass it on already, and the routine began again before Malfoy's next comment floated up about how Potter's head was feeling? Did he need a lie down in the Hospital wing? It had been a whole week since he'd been in there after all.

"I wish that one was more of a joke," Lily groaned, considering her son had successfully woken up in there all four years.

On his next pass through Ron did catch his ball with skill, but then overenthusiastically lobbed it off to Katie which smacked her right in the face. Fred flew over at once and offered her a purple bit of candy, promising this would stop the problem.***

"Ooph," all five of them winced for that pain, though James tried to bolster, "least that one wasn't entirely his fault, Katie's got to work on her reflexes as well."

"He speaks from experience of one to many Quaffles in the face," Sirius agreed.

Angelina seemed to decide that was enough of that practice as the team broke up into their usual positions then, but Ron wasn't having much better luck this way. Harry wasn't paying much attention to anyone else as he weaved in and around looking for the Snitch, so stopped in surprise when Angelina blew her whistle and called at Ron he needed to be covering all of his posts, he was only hovering in front of the one.

"Well he was only used to playing with one post, back at home," Harry defended lightly.

"Guess there is room for adjustment time," James agreed.

Ron apologized at once while he tried to lengthen his field, Angelina coaching that he should be circling them all, or he'd let in more than the last three.

Lily winced upon the word three. She wasn't even much of a Quidditch fan and she was starting to feel bad for Ron, the boys were past that and starting to shift with unease at this poor display. They liked Ron a lot, but maybe he wasn't cut out for this game on such a level, not everyone was.

Before she went back to training she asked wasn't Katie's nose getting any better, but Katie said it was only getting worse. Fred eyed another piece of candy he'd apparently just given to her, and suddenly looked horror struck.

"Well that can't be good," Remus yipped at once in concern.

"Just what did the twins do?" Sirius agreed in a sudden surge. "I remember them saying they hadn't perfected the nosebleed one yet, but I thought by giving her that it would at least stem the flow, not make it worse!"

"They gave her the purple pill," James soothed, though his own twitching showed he wasn't entirely okay with this either, "surely they're not just using her for a test dummy."

Not long after, Katie had to be escorted off the field, face pure white from blood loss, by the twins who had accidentally given her a Blood Blister pod.

"What does he mean by mistake?" Lily demanded dangerously. "Thought they were color coded for a reason, how could he give her the wrong one?"

They really had no answer for this, it wasn't like the twins to be so careless with their own products.

Angelina gave in on practice for the day and slumped off amongst the Slytherin's most recent chant of 'Gryffindors are losers!' They made their way back to the common room where Hermione asked in a frosty voice how it had gone. Ron at once said it had been lousy, and Hermione's voice cooled in sympathy it was only his first after all.

"It's nice she thaws on them when it counts," Remus chuckled.

Ron snapped who'd said it had been him that made it lousy?

Sirius couldn't help but snort lightly for his snap, she had made the presumption, even if it was right.

Then he marched off to go get his book bag, while Hermione leaned in and whispered for Harry alone if it had been him.

Harry said no with loyalty.

"There's my little Gryffindor," James beamed for the response he'd have given.

When Hermione kept staring, he conceded it hadn't been the best, but this really had been his first crack.

No more was said as the two spent the evening going through all their work, made extra difficult as Harry could still hear the echo of the Slytherin's cruel chant.

"Oh Harry, don't let yourself get so psyched out as well," Sirius tried to comfort, "that won't help Ron."

"Malfoy really has this way of sticking in my head," Harry huffed.

They spent the rest of the night and the whole of Sunday pushing through their mountain of work, by Sunday night Harry was feeling as if his brain was smashing its way out of his skull.

"Lovely mental imagery," Remus winced in sympathy.

Harry muttered for Ron they really should be doing more of this over the week.

"Well it's not as if you had much of a choice," James said fairly, "what with being physically tortured and all," his voice finishing with flat ice.

Harry winced and hid his hand from sight again, knowing they weren't letting that one go anytime soon.

Hermione had spent her time relaxing, making more elf hats, and chatting with other friends the whole time, but as the night wore on and most of the common room emptied out for their early morning tomorrow, she took pity and wandered over, glancing at Ron's current Astronomy essay and corrected Jupiter's biggest moon was Ganymede, and Lo had the volcanoes.

"Exactly what text was he using to be swapping all those?" Remus asked in sympathy.

"The book was upside down, he didn't even seem to notice he was as exhausted as I was," Harry sighed. "I probably would have noticed soon, I was almost done with mine."

Ron began scratching out the wrong information without a word, while Hermione began apologizing.

"Why's she apologizing, I thought she always critiqued your homework," Lily said in surprise.

"Ron looked ready to make her eat that quill as he was using it," Harry winced, his best mate not in the mood for Hermione to be doing this over his shoulder in that way.

Ron snapped he didn't want to hear it if she was just going to criticize.

"I was under the impression she always criticized him," Sirius said lightly.

"I'm still convinced that's their form of flirting," Remus snorted, thinking Ron was looking for a good row to let off some steam, and Hermione was more than likely his usual go to with that.

Hermione spotted something else, but when Ron tried to cut her off he didn't want to hear it, Hermione pointed at Hermes in the window.

"Not Percy's owl?" James yelped in shock as he leaned over Lily's shoulder to read that one.

"Why do you even remember that detail?" Sirius asked as he certainly hadn't.

Lily shushed them both while reading with an honest touch of hope, maybe Percy was trying to come around and apologize? Hopefully that letter was for all his siblings and he'd made up with his parents?

Ron went to the window at once and wrenched it open, Percy's owl swooping in and landing on Ron's moon of Io.

"I'm sure the Professor will appreciate the attention to detail," James muttered as he was still trying to peek over Lily's shoulder and see what this was about, while she was just as effectively ignoring him.

Ron tore open the envelope curiously and began reading, but his expression quickly flipped to disgust the longer he read.

"That was not an encouraging start," Remus began without much surprise, though he still couldn't imagine what this was about, while Lily sighed with disappointment and couldn't bother clinging to her hope anymore as she got it out.

He wordlessly thrusted the letter to his friends, apparently to appalled for words, as they began reading to themselves about Percy's beginning stating he'd heard from the Minister of Magic himself,

"That was entirely unnecessary," James huffed.

"As was that," Lily snipped at him.

that Ron had become a Prefect. This was excellent news, as Percy had always feared Ron would take the 'Fred and George' route, but now he was elated to hear his youngest brother had decided to take on some responsibility.

"He didn't decide anything," Sirius threw his hands up in exasperation for people continually saying that. No one put their name down, no one did anything to become Prefect, it was entirely the decision of the Heads of Houses and ultimately Dumbledore.

He was sending this letter with as much warning as anything though, for if he expected to go further in life with this achievement, he should be warned of his continued fraternization with Harry Potter, which he'd gathered Ron was still hanging around again from word of the Minister.

Remus frowned in confusion, wondering what Umbridge had passed along that involved Ron at all? He supposed he wasn't too surprised if that thing was keeping tabs on Harry's friends as well though.

Percy put in the simple fact that Ron could quickly lose his badge if this kept up.

Harry spluttered with absolute indignation. What had he done to deserve that from anyone, let alone a person he'd gotten to know on at least some level? He'd never taken a liking to Percy, but he'd never thought he'd done anything to deserve him telling his own brother to drop him? Ron was Harry's first friend, his best friend, and more family than he'd ever had in his life before he met Sirius.

James fired up at once, snapping, "what does Percy want, for Ron to be an outcast and no one to like him like Percy is?"

The sad truth was, yes Lily did believe that. Percy may have heard this news and immediately hoped that he could reconnect with some member of his family, because he likely was lonely. That didn't excuse what he'd just told to do to her son.

Percy expected Ron to read this with some surprise, no doubt Ron would say that Potter was Dumbledore's favorite,

"Why would that be his response?" Sirius scowled with anger as well as confusion for that one. Harry never once asked for that treatment.

but Dumbledore may not be in charge around school much longer anyways if those in charge had a more accurate account of Potter's behavior had things settled as Percy expected them to.

With every line Percy had written Remus continued growing more confused and angry, this one in particular caught him off guard. What did he mean Dumbledore wouldn't be in charge of the school anymore? That was an oddity in itself, he'd been the headmaster for generations already and in a most likely biased opinion the most reputable of them all. That didn't quite knock out the anger of the second part, more accurate his arse. Ron was Harry's best friend for years, he'd have the most accurate portrayal of Harry more than anyone, shouldn't this be his say so.

Percy wouldn't enlighten this statement further, but Ron should check out the Daily Prophet tomorrow for more details to see where the wind was blowing, and to spot himself along the way.

"Why am I not surprised this whole letter was planned out just to brag about himself winding up in the paper somehow," Sirius snarled.

Percy persisted, seriously Ron

"He doesn't get to use my name," Sirius huffed, to which he was ignored by all this time.

did not want to be on the same branch with Potter anymore or it would damage his future, and this was speaking of life after school. Ron surely knew of Potters disciplinary hearing, and he had not come out of it looking good. He'd gotten off on a technicality, and many of the Wizengamot still found him guilty.

"Guilt of what!?" James thundered. "He saved his own damn life plus his useless cousin! What were they even trying to prove during that shame of a trial? That he cast a Patronus Charm for shits and giggles!"

"You should never argue with a stupid person, they'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." Remus snipped.

It was best for Ron to sever ties with Potter, the earlier the better, even if he did become violent. If Ron had any worries he was encouraged to go see Umbridge, a delightful woman who would be happy to help.

Lily did not get that out as if an intelligible person had said it, more like repeating the words of someone hit with a babbling curse. It made no sense in or out of context.

This led into his next bit of advice, which he'd hinted at above,

"Hinted implies subtly," James snorted with disgust.

that Dumbledore would not remain in charge at school long, and Ron should be thinking of his future with the Ministry. So far Umbridge had been getting very little cooperation from the staff and the Ministry was striving to fix this, again see the Prophet tomorrow, and those who were on Umbridge's side could be well placed for Head Boy ship not long later.

"Climb as far up her brown nose as you can and make a comfy nest with the rest of her eggs," Sirius mocked.

Percy did tack in an apology about how he was sorry he couldn't see Ron over the summer,

"Bet he wouldn't care one bit if he didn't know you were a Prefect," Sirius snapped.

and it did pain in how he disliked criticizing his parents, but what with the riff raff they kept up with like Sturgis Podmore, and other petty criminals, he was lucky the Minister didn't see him in the same light.

James looked ready to light the book on fire any moment now. Percy had successfully insulted three people he cared about in one go! It took a lot of restraint on his part to remind himself Percy was still a child right now who shouldn't be transfigured into a pumpkin.

He was very gracious he'd disassociated himself with the likes of Dumbledore's crowd and promised Ron could still do the same and not to let family ties blind him. He'd be ready to accept their apology whenever they were ready and realized their mistakes.

"If both sides keep standing around waiting for an apology instead of doing something, this war is going to be harder than I was thinking," Sirius grumbled as he remembered his own words.

He signed off with the plea to think this all over, particularly the bit about Potter, and congratulated him one last time on becoming a prefect.

"Burn that Harry. Burn that and shove the sod right up that Humongous Big Heads nose." James said at once with conviction.

"It's Ron's letter," Harry sighed, "I think he should get the right."

"That's fair," Sirius acknowledged.

When Harry was done, he reread one bit to make sure he got it right, before turning to Ron and said if he wanted to sever ties with him, he promised he wouldn't get violent.

The boys at least garnered a laugh for Harry's sarcasm at that, while Lily sighed deeply. She wished that hadn't been played off as a joke, but she supposed it was better than Harry getting mad at Ron's brother, and taking it out on Ron, which with his temper lately she wouldn't have even been surprised.

Ron jerked the letter away nastily at once, calling him the biggest prat on earth as he ripped the parchment up into tiny little scraps and tossed it into the fire.

"Less satisfying than up the nose," James sighed.

"But a proper in the moment response," Remus smiled.

Then he turned dismissively back to their homework.

Lily managed almost a happy giggle for this display, thinking Percy should send Ron more stupid letters if that's what got him to focus on his homework more.

Remus almost agreed, finding his utter dismissal of this perfect.

Hermione was looking at Ron with an odd expression on her face.

"What kind of odd look?" Lily asked with a torn expression, she really hoped Hermione wasn't going to try and give Ron a pep talk or something, it wouldn't do him any good right now.

"I think it was something close to surprise, maybe admiration," Harry tried to smile. "Ron wouldn't ever show it, but what Percy did cut all his siblings as bad as his parents, and so when Hermione saw Ron just turn right back to homework after what Ron considered further spurn must have gotten to her."

Lily couldn't help a small smile now as she kept going. It didn't make that letter feel any better, but it was nice to see Hermione acting like their friend rather than mother for a change.

Then she stunned them both by demanding their homework from them so she could correct what they'd done.

"Doesn't she usually do that anyways when you're done?" Sirius chuckled.

"She'd certainly been threatening not to do it enough lately we were starting to believe her," Harry smiled in relief.

He asked if she was serious?

"No, I am," Sirius reminded as if anyone had forgotten.

Then he began thanking her at once, calling her a life saver and what could he say to-

She said he could say he wouldn't wait to do all his homework till the last minute ever again, while looking on in amusement.

"They're not even done with them though," James reminded.

"Still better to get her help while she was in a good mood, half the work done," Harry cheered, though the smile didn't quite reach his eyes.

Harry thanked her as well as he pushed his away in relief, letting himself sink down and gaze at the fire quietly for a moment with a sick feeling resting in him as the remains of Percy's letter curled away in the fire.

They all frowned as they realized Harry had taken that much more personally than they'd realized, he'd even played off the moment in here well enough they'd thought he'd just completely brushed it off, but clearly not.

Somehow reading all that in Percy's writing pressed in on him for the first time his standing with the majority of the Wizarding World. He'd known Percy for years, had spent summers at his house and shared a tent with him at the World Cup, Percy had been the one to award him full marks during the second task last year, but now the same guy found him unbalanced and violent.

"This is the same guy who went sobbing out into the freezing lake to check on his kid brother," Remus huffed in agreement. "How did he go from that to dismissing his whole family in so little time?"

"You've got me?" James sighed deeply.

Harry felt sudden empathy for his godfather, whom the whole world also believed had done something he'd had no part of.

Sirius hummed in agreement with that, even if he couldn't be there for Harry in the ways he wanted to be, he found comfort even the idea he could relate to Harry made him feel better.

Then Harry sat up straight in his chair as he gazed at the fire in confusion, surely he'd imagined it because he was thinking of his godfather.

"Oh, is Sirius making another appearance in the common room?" James asked as if confirming the date.

"Now he even has a safe place to do it from," Remus agreed almost as if bored at the idea.

Truth be told it made both of them smile and more anxious at the same time. They couldn't easily forget where Sirius was in Harry's time and found him talking to Harry face to face would surely make him feel better for even a moment.

Hermione was done with both homeworks, haven written out a draft for Ron to use as his conclusion,

"Okay, that was blatantly doing homework for you," Lily snorted.

"I guess she truly was taking pity on us," Harry chuckled.

Ron insisted she was the most wonderful person he'd ever met,

"I think this is the most he's complimented her in their entire friendship, she may be falling over from shock," Sirius chuckled.

and if he was ever rude to her again-

She'd know he'd gone back to normal, Hermione finished for him with a smile.

"There's the proper response," James snickered.

Then she turned on Harry's, saying he must have heard Sinestra wrong, as Europa was covered in ice, not mice.

"Sometimes I really can't tell when Hermione's being sarcastic," Remus smirked, "she must know that was a slip of the quill."

Harry just grinned and didn't reply.

Harry was no longer listening as he crouched down in front of the fireplace, watching it steadily now as he told his friends what he'd just seen. It wasn't that surprising, as Sirius had appeared her once before to talk to him, but Hermione was concerned at once at the idea, saying it would be too- Sirius?!

"But I'm always serious, how could I be anything else?" Sirius cackled.

"She was actually saying your name you twit," Lily ground out, cursing that man's parents for cursing their child and everyone else in his life with this never-ending gag.

She gasped his name in surprise as Sirius' face sat among the logs, grinning at them.

"You already sound so pleased with yourself," James snickered.

"I honestly believe I've been looking forward to this all week, Harry's letter just happened around the same time," Sirius grinned.

He began to say he'd been worried this wouldn't work, he'd been checking every hour and there'd always been someone else in here.

Harry half laughed that he'd been popping his head in here once an hour? Hermione anxiously demanded what if someone had seen him.

"I'm sure you'd have heard about it, and the twins would have helped to laugh the whole thing off by saying they'd slipped something in there, or any number of things." Remus rolled his eyes at her paranoia.

Sirius shrugged off that some first year may have gotten a start from him, but she'd probably just thought he was a funny shaped log.

"Honestly, in a school full of magic, a funny shaped log wouldn't have lingered in her mind in the time it took for her to get to the stairs," James agreed.

Hermione still said this was too big a risk for him to be-

Sirius cut her off by telling her to stop sounding like Molly, Sirius was just trying to respond to Harry's letter.

Hermione turned her accusing voice on Harry now, as he hadn't told them about this.

"And that's exactly why he didn't," Sirius scoffed at Hermione's never ending complaints.

Harry admitted he'd forgotten, as the instance with Cho had pushed the rest of that morning from his mind, before turning back to Sirius and saying no one could have gotten anything from that letter anyways.

"She doesn't believe anyone can do anything without her help," James rolled his eyes.

Sirius agreed at once it had been very good, beginning on that with Harry's scar.

Ron tried to ask what that meant, but Hermione shushed him and they'd tell later.

"I understand the need for the haste, but why hadn't you told Ron about this already?" Lily asked.

"Same reason I'd yet to tell Hermione about my detentions," Harry shrugged uneasily as he brought this back up himself but still explained, "hadn't come up until I was caught at it."

"You have that philosophy far too often," Remus huffed.

Sirius agreed he understood this couldn't be fun for Harry, but it had hurt like this before now.

Harry agreed it had just concerned him it had been extra bad around that Umbridge woman, but Sirius had no delusions she was a Death Eater.

Harry said she was foul enough to be one, while Sirius gave a wry smile and said the world wasn't split into good people and Death Eaters.

"I always want to faint in surprise when you pass on such words of wisdom," Lily smiled at him while Sirius grinned and Harry took a moment to register the truth of those words he'd never considered before.

Sirius did agree that he already knew of her reputation though, Remus went on enough about her.

That caught their attention with surprise, Lily going on eagerly to see what that foul woman had been saying about her friend, and hopefully some colorful recanting of what Remus had to say about it.

Harry asked in surprise how Lupin knew her, remembering Umbridge's comments about half-breeds during their first class.

James's mouth dried considerably as he did remember this. She hadn't been subtle in taking a shot at Remus, and he already felt a nasty fear of where this was going.

Sirius explained not personally, but she'd drafted some anti-werewolf legislation two years ago that made it impossible for him to get a job.

Lily spluttered with indignation nearly before she'd gotten that out, and that had nothing on his two friends. They already had every reason in the world wanting that sherbet-reject to shrivel up and die, turns out they should have been going for her head all those years ago. Was this in fact finally the reason Remus had left his post? That would have happened right around the time he left Hogwarts, when Snape had released his name as working at Hogwarts!

Instead of shrinking away whenever this topic came up, Remus looked a tad concerned for this news, and not just for himself. It was very rare to find any other werewolves who even tried to maintain a normal lifestyle with a job and such, but with this bit of legislation being passed it was as if they were being told not to even bother with that. He'd never complained of the restrictions of the jobs they could get because he recognized the danger in his own kind, but was the Ministry moving even further away in trying to phase out his whole kind, truly turn them into no more than animals that needed to be killed. How could they ever show how normal they could be if no one gave them a chance? Then he reminded himself what he'd long since came to the conclusion of, no one cared.

Harry remembered how much shabbier Lupin looked these days and his dislike of Umbridge deepened even further.

Remus blinked in a bit of surprise for that. From what he'd gathered, Harry hadn't much to do with him in his own time, so the fact that he had such a strong reaction like that really did warm him up a bit. He really hadn't thought it possible for a long time anyone outside his friends could see him as any more than a monster, but first Lily and now Harry...

Hermione demanded what that woman had against werewolves, and Sirius said it was all part-humans, she'd even tried to round up all merpeople and have them tagged a few years back, imagine wasting the energy on such things when toe rags like Kreacher were about.

"I'm sure she doesn't like them any better," Remus scoffed to try and lighten back up the mood, at least trying to pretend as he always did he hadn't heard a word about this. "House-elves do have a certain human shape but aren't, so they're in the-"

Sirius elbowed him in the ribs to get him to shut up, no one wanted to hear him play this off right now.

Ron laughed but Hermione looked offended, trying to tell Sirius if he'd just make an attempt, she was sure Kreacher would respond.

Sirius knew he'd rather lose his dessert privileges than indulge in any such nonsense, and wished Hermione would quit harping on that.

Harry thought the same, if only because it left such a tight feeling of unease in him he felt the urge to cry and refused to understand why.

Dumbledore did say-

Sirius blatantly ignored her and asked what Umbridge's lessons were like, was she training them to kill half-breeds?

"No, that would actually be useful," Remus snorted lightly, before wincing and wishing he hadn't spoken at all for the nasty look his friends gave him for that.

Harry said no while Hermione looked affronted her defense had been cut off.

"You'd really think at some point she'd realize, no one cares!" James threw his hands up in exasperation.

She wasn't letting them use magic at all.

This didn't surprise Sirius though, as he'd heard that the Minister was growing more paranoid by the day and no longer wanted the students trained in combat.

Harry was stunned, asking why, did she think they were forming their own army?

Sirius agreed that was exactly what his delusions feared, the man thought Dumbledore was amassing his own force to overthrow the Ministry.

"I've never heard something so idiotic in my life," James deadpanned, "and I've lived with these two for seven years."

"I, really wish Sirius was making a joke right now," Lily agreed.

There was a pause before Ron stated that was the stupidest thing he'd heard in his life, and he'd been around Luna Lovegood.

"Was that supposed to be a compliment, or-" Sirius began in confusion before Remus shushed him.

Hermione was outraged this was the reason behind their lack of education, while Sirius elaborated Fudge was convinced Dumbledore would do anything to get power, it's only a matter of time before he has the man arrested at this point.

"That'll be the day," Remus scoffed while Harry frowned at the idea, he really didn't like the sound of that.

Harry asked if he knew anything about this big deal that was supposed to be in the Prophet tomorrow Percy had dropped hints about, but Sirius said he hadn't a clue, no one had actually been around all week.

Lily's voice shook with pity there, to which Sirius was both grateful for, and wanted to make some snide comment at her for. Thankfully she kept going loudly before he could act on either.

Sirius' voice had quickly turned bitter as he said this, so Harry instead asked about Hagrid.

Sirius didn't seem too concerned, saying while he was supposed to be back by now and they weren't sure why he wasn't,

"Tactless as ever," Lily grumbled at him, ignoring her own increasing worry at those confirmed fears. Surely if this was a real problem though Sirius would be more concerned, he at least had a like for Hagrid even without knowing what all he'd done for Harry. This wasn't necessarily a death sentence if someone didn't come back from a mission on schedule...

but upon seeing their stricken faces Sirius quickly said Dumbledore wasn't worried about it, so everything was surely fine. Maxime had gone with him, and she'd arrived back on schedule and simply said they'd split up on the journey home, there was no reason to suggest a real problem.

"I think we need to have a refresher course on those talks about reassuring people Sirius," Remus groaned, as that had helped no one at any point it seemed.

The three exchanged a still anxious look, but Sirius insisted for them not to go around asking questions and drawing attention to this.

"We haven't been," Harry said just a touch indignantly, "you were the only one I'd asked."

"Well I know that now," Sirius rolled his eyes in exasperation, causing Harry to back down.

Then Sirius flipped topics to asking when their next Hogsmeade weekend was, he wanted to show up and-

"And just why would you think that would cheer them up?" Lily began anxiously as she fought the compulsion to stick a muzzle on Sirius. "You were already spotted once, what makes you think it a good idea to have another go?"

"Stop being such a worry wart Lily," James scoffed at once. "He needs out of that place more, even if it is at sporadic times like Hogsmeade weekends."

"Where was this attitude last year?" Remus demanded uneasily, this conversation just kept getting worse with everything his last best friend said.

"Last year Sirius was on the run, getting all the air he needed, so I was just worried about him covering his tail," James scowled at Remus for the lack of backup. "Now I'm worried what he'll do if he doesn't get out more."

Sirius longed for the time where he could have basked in having a whole conversation about him, now he just looked miserable and didn't account for anyone, he just wanted to forget about the existence of that house and his whole damn future.

Harry and Hermione shouted no at once, Hermione quickly saying the article they'd found this morning. Sirius brushed this off, saying they were always guessing something and it never panned out.

"I mean, I suppose so long as Kingsley is still pushing for Australia or something, whatever Malfoy said could be brushed off easily enough," Remus tried to say with some encouragement that fell flat to all worried parties.

Harry insisted Lucius had spotted him near that train, and what if Draco did in Hogsmeade?

"Then don't go near Malfoy," James scoffed. "Honestly, Padfoot knows every hole of that area better than the local cats."

"Doesn't make the risk any less," Lily sighed without too much of a fight, recognizing whatever Sirius wanted to do, he'd do it with or without anyone's support.

Sirius scowled at them before saying he wouldn't, he'd just thought they'd like to get together.

"You really are breaking my heart here pup," Sirius tried for a flippant tone while Harry eyed his godfather with great worry. Ever since he'd left that platform, Harry had an ever growing fear of the next time Sirius left that house, leaving his tongue paralyzed and unable to respond...

Harry insisted he just didn't want to see him back in Azkaban!

Sirius' face went flat blank as he said Harry was less like his father than Sirius had thought, the risk would have been what made it fun for James.

Sirius actually recoiled, suddenly looking ready to burst into tears any moment as he had concrete proof. Merlin's sake, he really had lost his mind if he thought even for a moment he'd been talking to James-

Lily had just huffed and rolled her eyes at the stupid comment, she didn't even seem to realize Sirius had taken it so personally while James kept his eyes firmly on his best mate now.

Remus reacted on instinct by smacking Sirius upside the head for that, muttering, "would you rather him be like you, not thinking before you speak."

Sirius hardly seemed to realize what had been spoken as he whispered back, "that hurt you know."

Remus wasn't sure if he meant the comment, or the blow, as he rolled his eyes and said, "I didn't damage anything important."

"All of me is important!" He shot back with almost a pout, managing to keep himself distracted at least for a few seconds while Lily finished.

Harry tried to say something else, but Sirius said he'd write again whenever Harry could stand the risk, and then he was gone.

Remus was looking from James to Sirius uneasily, as Lily looked up to indicate she was done and seemed to realize for the first time that had bothered the two, so Remus began ardently, "wonder if we should take a quick break again. I'm sure someone should check on the baby's dipper, and I-"

"Yeah, that's great Moony. Padfoot, can I borrow you for a moment," James snapped, not waiting for any preamble as he made his way for the stairs and Sirius followed reluctantly.

HPHPHPHPHPHP

* This one gets under my skin out of confusion. Either Harry has completely forgotten the fact that he was the one who had to trick Malfoy into giving Dobby that sock, otherwise he could have just done it himself and set Dobby free if that was his intentions, or he really thought Hermione found a way around this law and it's just never addressed. This is a real problem with the narrative between two and five that is never brought up.

**I know that's a really subjective number, considering by most math there would only be about 300, but JK has said there were actually almost a thousand. I personally more invasion somewhere in the middle, though I imagine the population slump from the war and other variables actually makes the number fluctuate between those two numbers throughout the years, so who really knows.

*** This moment genuinely annoys me for two reasons. The twins specifically say the purple half is the 'cure' pill for their works, and this is proven in the very last chapter where they gave purple pills to the first years to wake them up, so they did indeed give the right pill. Problem two with this, is then, what do you mean you gave her the wrong pill? Either you color swapped a batch in which case you lot are far more idiotic than I thought for all your hard work doing this, or this is just some serious (shut up Sirius!) errors with the flowing work. Twice in one chapter man...

[virtuemoired]

do a deep dive into “you raise me up” Kobe 2018 i dare you!

thou asked, thou shalt be given. buckle in ladies, bc u r in for a wild ride! welcome to why you raise me up is quite frankly one of the greatest gifts i’ve ever been given.

firstly, i advise u to watch this video FIRST, since this is unrightfully one of their more underrated programs and obviously NONE of y’all watch it on the daily so here’s a refresher:

here we go!

the first notes of the angelic “you raise me up” start playing, and our star crossed lovers are NOWHERE TO BE SEEN. but then- you see the shadows of two figures start to skate out from opposite ends of the rink, and you just KNOW history is about to be made. they slowly make their way towards the centre of the rink AND EACH OTHER, and when they finally touch, all is right in this world. and we are only 20 seconds in. 

first up, we have the iconic lift which if u know me, is my FAVOURITE CHOREOGRAPHIC ELEMENT OF ALL TIME. we started from jack & diane and now we’re here and honestly, i’m crying tears of JOY bc this one’s for me. 

next, we have latch choreography, and i know the haters are going to scream, “but this is RECYCLED choreo, how could it POSSIBLY be any good?” to which i say 1. r u literally forgetting that tessa and scott had an UNDEFEATED season with latch choreography? 2. if u r gonna complain about latch, do NOT come for the incredible, showstopping latch pause™️ in it’s full glory and 3. it is timed perfectly with the music and i will NOT stand for such slander!!!!

moving on, we see them do 1.5 crossovers, but those crossovers are the BEST crossovers i have EVER seen. they transition into my next favourite choreographic element and the only flaw is that the camera angle does not do this MASTERPIECE justice, but i digress. do u see how he picks her up when the word “silence” is sung and places her down EXACTLY when the singer says the word “come”??? and even though this is a LIVE singer, that will NOT stop mr scott patrick moir from being the best ice dancer in the entire world.

more crossovers, and i am already full on SOBBING. what’s more they do it WHILE LOOKING INTO EACH OTHER’S EYES and along with the MUSIC as we hit the chorus. when he sings “you raise me up”, their SOULS intertwine and scott lifts her up as “i can stand on mountains” is being sung, and u know what? scott moir let tessa virtue stand on his thighs with knives on her feet for 22 YEARS so yes, i DO think that this is a ~mowment~ for the history books. 

scott spins her in a circle and when the singer says “walk” he extends his leg out which is so EXTRA but so GOOD. then “seas” is being sung, and scott tosses tessa up in the air and catches her RIGHT ON THE PIANO KEY, setting her down on the beat. as paul macintosh said u simply cannot teach this!!! and tessa’s ARMS go together with the music so well, esp when “strong” is being sung, hopefully in the next 10 years we will have those harry potter moving picture frames so i can hang this moment above my first born’s crib.

now comes the part about this video that i absolutely LOVE because they fade their skating footage w the video of the singer and i am hereby declaring that ALL subsequent ice shows w live music should be filmed like that!! 21 summer i am looking at u!!! this is having ur cake and eating it too it is the BEST OF BOTH WORLDS and i am forever INDEBTED to the genius who came up w this idea, probably my lord and saviour the nhk photographer. back to the program. they change dance holds like 3 times, but u don’t even REALISE it bc u r so entranced by their beauty and their grace. also they do it while maintaining EYE CONTACT like HOW oh my god legends only.

we know the iconic goose lift is coming bc the chorus is about to hit and virtuemoir are the most DRAMATIC ice dancers to ever walk the face of the earth. and of course there’s a lighting change bc why NOT. i say, go big or go home, and do it exactly when “you raise me UP” is sung just for the brownie points. next is recycled latch/moulin rouge/long time running choreo and all PERFECTLY TIMED!! they simply DO! NOT! MISS! A! BEAT! and this is the only acceptable way to use recycled choreo, next.

they stay true to the original choreography bc he does a double twizzle even though this ISN’T a competitive skate but scott moir said you will GIVE ME THAT LEVEL 4 for a double twizzle i WILL hit those level features and i felt that in my bones.

v/m really said we will give u all ur fav programs bc they do the final lift from stay and scott lifts tessa on his shoulders as the singer sings “strong”, which is like, such a power move on his part. also completely on brand, bc the full lyrics is “you raise me up when i am on your shoulders” AND TESSA VIRTUE IS LITERALLY ON HIS SHOULDERS, not a misstep in sight.

it is just so pleasing to me that every time the singer sings “you raise me up” they do a lift which is so on the nose and i am LIVING. case in point: he lifts her up on the words “more” bc he is irrefutably declaring that he will take tessa to heights greater than himself. but then before the line finishes he dips her and circles her around and then u REALISE that they are BOTH singing this to EACH OTHER. they are both raising each other up to more than they can be. love that for them.

before the singer sings “you raise me up” one last time, the piano hits one last dramatic key and on that key scott twirls tessa in a circle and this just brings back memories of tessa saying “he is the melody and i am the piano” which hits different, yknow? and to top it all off, in their final lift, they do it exactly in time with the music, when will your faves EVER?

finally, they gaze longingly into each other’s eyes, and i’m JUST saying that if u end off ur performance like this, u give me no CHOICE but to embrace it with open arms. scott whispers “good job” to her, and this image lives in my mind rent free.

bc this is a dare, i am compelled to give u more evidence to substantiate why this performance is one of their best, if you aren’t already convinced. first up, their COSTUMES. if you’d read my top tessa costumes post, then you would know that this is in my honest opinion tessa’s BEST costume, so you raise me up is already looking promising in my book. but then, we have scott moir wearing his carmen costume that he loves oh so much, like seriously, i don’t think he’s reworn any costume more than this one, and i completely 100% understand why. this is long time running!Scott (which is the BEST scott) and carmen!Scott combined, but with the vibes of latch!Scott, so really, we WON with this program, need i say more? this is like what i envisioned everything would be in my dreams, but it was so much better than that. v/m literally raised me up to more than i could be with it.

[secretlyatargaryen]

I'm really, really tired of Tyrion haters getting up in arms about his thought about how Sansa's grief made her "more beautiful” like it’s somehow the worst thing in the world.

Y'all will be like "how dare this disabled man feel attraction, gross" and then use the quote on ten thousand queen Sansa gif sets.

fyi I’m talking about this quote:

Her hair was a rich autumn auburn, her eyes a deep Tully blue. Grief had given her a haunted, vulnerable look; if anything, it had only made her more beautiful.

I mean, yeah, the quote is an obvious example of Tyrion idealizing Sansa and he's thinking of her as less of a person here and more of what she represents to him, as a romantic ideal that is out of reach. Sansa is everything he wants but can't have and is told that he shouldn't want to have because of his disability, beautiful, high born - the fact that she is a hostage of the Lannisters only idealizes her more because it makes her unattainable. Of course this is problematic, but Tyrion knows this. He also knows he shouldn't feel this way and part of his policing of his own thoughts are about how horrible this situation is for her and he doesn't want to put her through any more suffering, and part of it is him thinking that he shouldn't feel this way because he's a dwarf and the internalized ableism he constantly puts himself through as a result of his own trauma. So when I see y'all be like "how dare he" I think about how Tyrion himself thinks of any romantic/sexual feelings he has (towards anyone) as inherently wrong because of his dwarfism.

I want her, he realized. I want Winterfell, yes, but I want her as well, child or woman or whatever she is. I want to comfort her. I want to hear her laugh. I want her to come to me willingly, to bring me her joys and her sorrows and her lust. His mouth twisted in a bitter smile. Yes, and I want to be tall as Jaime and as strong as Ser Gregor the Mountain too, for all the bloody good it does.

I mean, of course Tyrion idealizes women and especially tragic women. He grew up with a horribly abusive father and an absent mother who was constantly held up as a tragic ideal and whose death he was directly blamed for. I also suspect this is part of why he sees Sansa as someone who he both wishes he could save and feels responsible for. Which makes it really strange that people ignore all that in his pov and claim that Tyrion doesn’t understand or empathize with Sansa’s grief.

He had expected anguish and anger when he told her of her brother's death, but Sansa's face had remained so still that for a moment he feared she had not understood. It was only later, with a heavy oaken door between them, that he heard her sobbing. Tyrion had considered going to her then, to offer what comfort he could. No, he had to remind himself, she will not look for solace from a Lannister. The most he could do was to shield her from the uglier details of the Red Wedding as they came down from the Twins. Sansa did not need to hear how her brother's body had been hacked and mutilated, he decided; nor how her mother's corpse had been dumped naked into the Green Fork in a savage mockery of House Tully's funeral customs. The last thing the girl needed was more fodder for her nightmares.

It was not enough, though. He had wrapped his cloak around her shoulders and sworn to protect her, but that was as cruel a jape as the crown the Freys had placed atop the head of Robb Stark's direwolf after they'd sewn it onto his headless corpse. Sansa knew that as well. The way she looked at him, her stiffness when she climbed into their bed . . . when he was with her, never for an instant could he forget who he was, or what he was. No more than she did. She still went nightly to the godswood to pray, and Tyrion wondered if she were praying for his death. She had lost her home, her place in the world, and everyone she had ever loved or trusted. Winter is coming, warned the Stark words, and truly it had come for them with a vengeance. But it is high summer for House Lannister. So why am I so bloody cold?

Tyrion knows he can’t do anything for her and he knows he shouldn’t try and that he’s just imposing on her or making it worse. He also knows that he shouldn’t be feeling bad for the Starks because it’s technically treason and that complicates his feelings towards her as well.

Tyrion also relates to Sansa's sadness and allows her to feel and express her grief in a way that few other people in King's Landing do, perhaps because he relates to her as someone who also feels trapped by his family and who knows what it feels like to be helpless. 

"I . . ." Sansa did not know what to say. Is it a trick? Will he punish me if I tell the truth? She stared at the dwarf's brutal bulging brow, the hard black eye and the shrewd green one, the crooked teeth and wiry beard. "I only want to be loyal."

"Loyal," the dwarf mused, "and far from any Lannisters. I can scarce blame you for that. When I was your age, I wanted the same thing." He smiled.

Tyrion’s very first interaction with Sansa is him expressing validation of her feelings and her grief - that she’s constantly being forced to deny - and her feeling comfortable enough to actually trust him because he’s in a similar liminal space as her, being seen as a “traitor” to her family and having to act the part but a hostage of his.

His grin turned into something softer as he studied her face. "Is it grief for your lord father that makes you so sad?"

"My father was a traitor," Sansa said at once. "And my brother and lady mother are traitors as well." That reflex she had learned quickly. "I am loyal to my beloved Joffrey."

"No doubt. As loyal as a deer surrounded by wolves."

"Lions," she whispered, without thinking. She glanced about nervously, but there was no one close enough to hear. 

Lannister reached out and took her hand, and gave it a squeeze. "I am only a little lion, child, and I vow, I shall not savage you."

Of course, Sansa can't truly trust him and she thinks he's trying to trick her when he does validate her grief aloud, and it's understandable why she feels that way, and it becomes even worse once they’re forced into marriage together, and Tyrion understands this, too. He’s constantly self-flagellating about it. It’s hard to miss. (Unless of course you didn’t read Tyrion’s chapters, lol)

She was not eating, either. "Sansa, is aught amiss?" He spoke without thinking, and instantly felt the fool. All her kin are slaughtered and she's wed to me, and I wonder what's amiss.

But knowing that he can’t help her and that she’s not in a position to fulfill his own emotional needs doesn't stop him from wishing that he could get through to her because like, people have complicated emotions. But it’s always tinted with the knowledge that he can’t and that it would be unfair to her for him to expect it, not entitlement. Even in the context of the quote that begins this meta, his thoughts are more like a confused attempt to reach out to her which he also criticizes himself for, not an expectation. And disabled characters should be allowed to have complicated emotions especially when it comes to love and sex without fandom going "ew gross" or treating it as predatory. 

People idealize other people all the time, and of course he does this with Sansa. He doesn’t know the real her and his attraction to her is much more about an ideal that she represents. But it’s a very human emotion and it doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care about her suffering, as is blatantly untrue in what is shown above, or that he “doesn’t see her as a real person.” He sees her as much as he can without actually being able to communicate with her. They don’t know each other, they’re not in a relationship, they’re married only in name and on opposite sides of a war. Still, he reaches out to her as a person and empathizes with her suffering long before the marriage and identifies with it in a very personal way (much like he does with Bran and Jon), divulging to Sansa information about his own history of abuse which he has rarely spoken aloud to any other character. He actually empathizes with her in much the same way that she does him, in a confused, terrified, vulnerable and detached sort of way, without actually being able to communicate or trust each other but feeling a deep pity for the other person and a sense of shared trauma.

Even without that, though, it’s not intrinsically wrong for a disabled person to think that a stranger is beautiful, even in a sad sort of way. Grief can be beautiful. Seeing people be vulnerable and wanting to comfort them can be incredibly attractive. It’s not like he’s saying he enjoys her suffering. And this fandom goes way off the deep end for some reason *cough* when it comes to disabled people just thinking about attraction.

[robinrunsfiction]

can we get a sequel to the lonely road? maybe the reader deletes their Twitter account and the haters are tweeting how weak they are and such and gee steps in on Twitter and all his socials talking about it and how happy he is and that everyone putting the reader down wasn't truly a fan because they weren't respecting her and how happy she made him? just gee stepping in and defending the reader

The Lonely Road Part 2 - Home Again

Pairing: Gerard Way x Female ReaderRating: Teen (for online bullying)Requested By: Three separate anonsWord Count: ~1,500Author’s Note: Holy smokes guys! Three separate anons all looking for part two of this story?! That make me feel so good as a writer! And the best part is that everyone seemed to have the same idea I did, as I had basically pulled that part out of part one to keep it from getting too long and rambling. Kinda like this note is getting. Ok on to the story!

Gerard flew back to LA later that day and your tour continued on. The next few stops were much better, thanks in part to the refreshing visit with Gerard and a day off that everyone sorely needed, but also Christine getting much more stern with the interviewers about the questions they would be asking. 

Having removed the Twitter app from your phone was proving to be incredibly helpful for your mental health, however it wasn’t silencing the constant stream criticism and hate from Gerard’s so-called fans. The longer you maintained your silence, the more vicious the tweets became.

I hope @(YFN)(YLN) bus crashes

Hey @mikeyway is (YN) as aweful as she seems?

can we just cancel her fo existing? #(YN)iscancelledparty

A couple weeks later, the tour was over and you were rolling back into LA. Christine drove you home and debriefed you on what you would be doing in the coming weeks, but most importantly you had a few days off. All you could think of was getting home and meeting up with Gerard, but when you finally arrived, a familiar car was already waiting in the driveway.

“Gee!” You squealed, jumping out of the passenger seat as soon as the car had stopped moving. You ran up to him and jumped in his arms as he spun you both around. “Ugh the last two weeks were the longest yet!”

“I know, I missed you so much,” he said, setting you back down before planting a big kiss on you. 

You weren’t aware of how long you had been lost in Gerard’s kiss until you heard Christine clearing her throat behind you.

“Sorry to interrupt this lovely reunion, you two really are the cutest I swear, but (YN) you wanna get your dirty laundry out the back seat of my car?” Christine asked snidely.

You pulled back and rolled your eyes as you went to retrieve your things.

“Thanks again for coordinating everything so I could come out and see (YN),” you heard Gerard say to Christine. 

“Happy to help. I’ll get outta here so I’m not interrupting any further,” she said with a wave. “Oh and don’t forget (YN), meeting on Tuesday at 11 AM.”

“Got it,” you said, waving her off as Gerard helped to carry your bags inside the house. “Ugh, finally it’s just you and me again,” you said, draping your arms over Gerard’s shoulders as he put his hands on your waist, kissing you sweetly.

“My favorite place to be,” he smiled. “What do you wanna do first?”

“Honestly? I’m starving, can we order some lunch? And then eat it in bed? And just stay in bed for like the rest of the day?“

“That sounds great,” Gerard laughed.

~

The next morning Gerard invited you to go along with him to the studio to sit in on My Chem’s recording session.

”(YN)! How was touring?“ Ray greeted you with a warm hug.

"Ugh, it was a real learning opportunity,” you laughed and rolled your eyes.

“Gee told us you were having some trouble with the internet. That’s why I just stay away from it,” Ray shrugged.

“You probably got the right idea,” you replied as Mikey and Frank walked in.

“Hey (YN), welcome back,” Mikey said, exchanging a look with Frank.

“Yea… what was that about?” You replied, narrowing your eyes as you lookied between the two of them.

“Nothin,” Frank replied. “I gotta get in there and get this riff recorded before I lose it,” he said,  hurrying into the recording booth. Ray turned his attention to talking to the producer about what Frank was doing, leaving you with the brothers.

“Mikey, what was that look you gave Frank?” Gerard pressed.

“Yea, spill it,” you chimed in.

Mikey sighed. “I went on twitter for the first time in a while and there were all these messages directed at me asking why you weren’t on there, if you were too scared and weak to face the fans, if I liked you dating Gee, if Gee was happy, asking me to break you guys up so Gee and Frank can be together,” he said rolling his eyes.

“For fucks sake,” Gerard muttered, running his hand through his hair.

“Did you reply?” You asked, your voice barely coming out as a squeak. You were so sick of this response when your music career was just barely taking off. What if you achieved the level of success you once dreamed of, what would the criticism be like then? And what if Gerard got sick of dealing with you and the drama that seemed to follow you at every turn.

“Nah, I’m not gonna dignify that shit with a response. But for the record, I love you and Gee together,” he smiled reassuringly.

“Well I’ve fucking had it,” Gerard snapped as he pulled his phone out of his jacket pocket.

“What are you doing?” You asked.

“Shutting this down. These people claim to be fans, but can’t show a shred of respect to you, me, Mikey, Frank, Jamia, any of us. It ends today.”

You glanced at Mikey, who shrugged and joined Ray listening to Frank play. Gerard quickly slipped deep into thought as he typed furiously at his phone. You turned your attention to Frank’s playing as well until you felt a tap on your shoulder.

“Wanna go for a walk?” Gerard asked.

“Sure,” you replied with a smile as you got up and followed him out of the studio. It was a warm, sunny day, perfect for being outside instead of cooped up in a soundproof, windowless room. Gerard’s hand found yours as you wandered down the street, eventually stopping at a small cafe with big planters of bright flowers surrounding their outdoor seating area.

“This place is so cute,” you commented between sips of your iced coffee when you found a table.

Gerard nodded in agreement, before sliding his chair closer to yours. “I wanna get a photo,” he said, holding up his phone as he leaned in and placed a kiss on your cheek and you laughed with delight. Before you knew it, you and Gerard were practically having a full-on photo shoot, taking photos on your phones of each other, and both of you together. You were laughing and having a wonderful time until two people in business attire shot you a withering glance as they sat down at one of the other tables to begin their meeting.

As Gerard’s laughter died down, he started scrolling through the photos. “This is the one,” he said.

“What?” You asked, looking up from your own collection of photos.

“One sec,” he said, concentrating on his phone for a moment. “Ok, umm, so I want you to read this caption before I post it on instagram. You’re the most important person in the world to me and I love you. I’m so sick of how you’re being treated online, so I hope this shuts it down.”

When you took his phone, you looked at the photo he had selected and edited a little. You were laughing, holding your coffee, the bright flowers behind you providing the perfect backdrop as the sun shone down, but your heart pounded in your chest as you scrolled down and began to read:

It frustrates me that I even have to write this, but it’s overdue. For weeks and months now, I’ve tried to ignore the near constant barrage of hate and vitriol being spewed toward someone who is so important to me. I’ve said before that (YN) brings so much happiness and love to my life, she’s someone that I’ll be with forever if I’m lucky. 

But when every day I have to see and hear that people are questioning how much joy she brings me, saying vile things to and about her, it makes me sick. No one deserves that. And the fact that it’s being done in the name of supposedly protecting me is unacceptable. Disrespect is unacceptable and that’s not what being a fan is. 

To everyone who has shown (YN) love and support with her new album, or at the very least treated her respectfully, thank you. I appreciate it so much.

To my love (YN), I am so sorry that I didn’t do this sooner. You’re the most talented, beautiful, thoughtful, loving woman I’ve ever met. Never let them steal what makes you wonderful. I’m here for you always.

You glanced up at Gerard, your eyes welling up with tears. “Thank you,” you said softly.

“I mean it, I’m so sorry I didn’t step in sooner. I thought if we ignored it, they’d shut up and go away, not get worse.”

“It’s ok, there was no way of knowing,” you shrugged. “Maybe this will get someone to think twice. And I think we’ll all be better off if we take a break from Twitter. That’s where the worst of it seems to be.”

“You’re right,” Gerard nodded. “I  really love you (YN),” he said with a gentle smile.

“I love you too. And thank you for everything you do for me,” you said as you leaned in and sweetly placed a kiss against his lips.