#misogynoir discussion

[orchidvioletindigo]

Hey y'all remember that post I made in June about a white male Fort Wayne PD officer who killed a young black man named Linzell "Zelly" Parhm at a traffic stop?

Same cop, Mason Wills, just got caught on camera alongside another white male FWPD officer, Matt Pierr, brutalizing a black woman named Tyjana Smith at a traffic stop.

The language they use to describe her is almost unbelievably loaded with fatphobia and misogynoir. Everything about Tyjana and her actions in defense of herself is characterized as violent and dangerous. They say she weighed well over 200 lbs and used her tremendous size against them when she in fact only weighs 180 lbs and is 5'4". They even call her leaning away from their grabbing hands violent.

Tyjana thankfully survived this encounter but was thrown in jail. Wills and Pierr had the gall to complain about abrasions and pain they sustained from this encounter while not mentioning that they repeatedly punched Tyjana in the face.

[orchidvioletindigo]

[ID: a photo of Ryan Gainer, a young, black teenage boy with dark skin, dark brown eyes, and short, coily black hair. He is standing in a sunny parking area wearing a blue polo shirt and smiling at the camera. /End ID.]

I don't want to pile potentially triggering quotes onto here but it feels important to mention that police used physical force against Ryan's physically disabled mother, Sharon Gainer, in the aftermath as well.

please when you talk about ryan, stop trying to set him apart from his autism. he was a black autistic child who was only 15, he wanted to drive so he could help his mother out. he wanted to be normal, he wanted to be normal.. he wanted to be so many things and the police cut his life short, i think about him everyday because what if that happens to me? would i like it if no one cares that the police KILLED me and only focused on one part of my identity. he was black, he was autistic, he was a joy to be around, he had a smile on his face and no one will ever see him smile again. how does that you feel? y’all don’t even talk about him despite y’all being the mentally ill queer disabled site.

WHERE IS THE OUTRAGE FOR HIM? WHERE IS IT

please talk about him, please talk about him

your silence speaks so loud

[leikeliscomet]

I can't believe in the lord's year of 2024 people genuinely think 'Ten didn't lead Martha on and Martha is to blame' is an unpopular opinion. Like I would love to see what alt timeline existed when the fandom collectively stood behind Martha over Ten and he became the least popular incarnation in the show. Everyone keeps posting the same 'both sides were wrong' takes in the discourse but the minute we actually unpack Ten's side in question suddenly it's 'attacking' 'demonising' 'cancelling'. Everyone loves to cry about nuance and grace and yet accusing Martha of being a predator, sexually manipulative and controlling is perfectly acceptable bc you lot are only willing to explore moral complexities with white characters. Nah it will always be incredibly gross to me that after a decade of racism towards her the minute the fandom actually starts to unpack the misogynoir and actually empathise with Martha for once and has the audacity to criticise anything Ten does, his stans paint the narrative that Martha is the aggressor and her stans hold the dominant position in the fandom and by perpetrating misogynoir they are fighting the good fight against the mainstream narrative when they've been the popular majority since 2006 I've had enoughhhh

EDIT: I've already made a post like this but ah well if we're gonna do up old discourse I'll bring up the old debunking arguments

[five-is-a-princess-confirmed]

tumblr users will say they don't like rap music because it's violent and misogynystic like they didn't watch hannibal

[athene-owl]

Whenever some white fandom thing like The Amazing Digital Circus or Dr Who or 911 or literally anything trends on here, I sure hope y'all are going out of your way to accuse people in those tags of not caring about Palestine and condescendingly lecture them about "real" social issues! Or is that attitude reserved for black women discussing Kendrick Lamar? 🤔🤔🤔

[tabby-shieldmaiden]

In general I have issues with the way Grady Hendrix writes Black women too. Both in this book and The Southern Bookclub’s Guide to Slaying Vampires. I think in both cases he wanted to commentate on the precarious position Black people and especially Black women and children face in society because of structural racism and misogynoir. But so much of the way he wrote it was just writing Black women and communities in a bad situation and then pointing at that and going “wow, isn’t this bad white America? :(”

Which is like, okay he pointed it out. But nothing really gets elaborated on beyond that and I didn’t get any feel of deeper analysis beyond just pointing out inequalities in the system. Which means in practice he is still a white author writing a Black woman in a support role and using her struggles and in the case of Final Girl, death, to further his white protagonist’s story. And that’s like. Mr Hendrix I think you need to think a little more about what you’re writing.

I think one of my favourite criticisms of The Final Girl Support Group is one made by WithCindy where she described how the book tried to end with a message about sisterhood and women sticking together with each other, and she responded with a “bitch, WHERE?” Because the book was really mostly filled with the women disliking one another and they didn’t really willingly help each other out much at all.

[vanilla-voyeur]

The Ozempic Olympics: Hollywood is Ruining Our Health

D'Angelo's best video yet! Finally a discussion on obesity that isn't cringey af

[ikarwawa]

It's so very important to me that when people throw around the terms TME and TMA that they understand that TMA =/= only transfeminine people.

The terms TMA and TME were created to because AGAB doesn't fully cover the lived experiences of the variety of trans, nonbinary, and intersex people. It's explicitly NOT meant to be AMAB = TMA and AFAB = TME. Not everyone AMAB who is nonbinary is transfeminine. Nonbinary people of any AGAB can be targeted by transmisogyny depending on their transitioning experience. Intersex people don't have to be CAMAB to be targeted by transmisogyny.

And that's not even broaching how race and transphobia intersect.

[the-adas]

anyways looking at that Yasmin Benoit post where multiple separate screenshots are all of white people's qrts and only like 5 people have said the word misogynoir or noticed/known that Yasmin Benoit is Not White and in fact Black tells me y'all should really be centering Black people more, bc it seems like we're getting to the point where people completely forget Black people are Black and don't take that into account as an axis of oppression at all

[orchidvioletindigo]

Some of y'all may remember my post from a few years ago about a tense confrontation I had with cops in my city sneaking up on me while I was having a mental health episode and reaching for their weapons when I panicked and went for the phone in my backpack pouch. I've said and thought so many times how much worse that would have ended had the same scenario happened to a black person.

This last Saturday night, Fort Wayne PD Officer Mason Wills shot and killed a black man named Linzell "Zelly" Parhm when Zelly reached for something during a traffic stop. The police department is claiming he was going for a gun – specifically a Draco AK pistol. For reference, that looks like this:

[ID: a photo of an automatic or semiautomatic rifle with a woodgrain grip, no stock, and a long, curved magazine with text below reading "Draco AK Pistol - 7.62mm." /End ID.]

This man was a 22-year-old hair dresser out minding his business. The gun is not seen in body cam footage until after a significant cut after Wills kills Zelly.

Given my own experience with reaching for my phone around cops in this town, the fact that police routinely plant evidence, and the fact that this police department in particular just recently got away with murdering a black woman named DaChe'na Warren-Hill by lying about her trying to run over her killer, I do not fucking believe that Zelly was going for a goddamn AK.

Rest in power, Zelly Parhm. You will not be forgotten.

[ID: a graphic from the Euell Wilson Center with a photo of a young, thin, dark skinned man with short, coily black hair; dark eyes; and a mustache and chin hair standing in front of two Christmas trees. He's wearing a metallic tuxedo jacket and matching bow tie over a black vest, dress shirt, and dress pants and smiling at the camera.

Text next to the photo reads, "Linzell Parhm. Linzell's smile could change the mood of any room and he smiled often, capturing the hearts of everyone. He had an amazing gift of connecting with anyone and always saw the good in people. Linzell worked tirelessly to ensure all the youth at the center felt a sense of belonging and he cared so deeply for his family and his community.

"Linzell worked as a barber and had dreams of owning a business one day.

"His legacy will be his passion for serving others with care and respect. Our deepest condolences to his family and friends during this very difficult time." /End ID.]

[musical-chick-13]

Since I'm especially on a tear about this: I also wish people who claim to enjoy fictional women would ask themselves if they still take an interest in female characters when those characters are not specifically designed to be universally-liked?

[mexicancat-girl]

Just finished watching The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes in theaters earlier today. I've got a lot of thoughts.

Overall the movie felt like a mixed bag, but I enjoyed it.

Spoilers below

The main characters were all worse versions of themselves in the film, minus Coriolanus (and arguably the Dean). In fact, some of the cleverness and actions that other characters had were taken and given to him instead-- like Sejanus' plan to give Marcus food.

Kind of disappointed how they rewrote Sejanus in general... They took a lot of scenes away from him and watered down his character a lot. His Ma literally got zero lines and only one cameo, despite her being a huge reason as to why Coriolanus and Sejanus are seen as such good friends in the first place.

I was still devastated by that scene with Sejanus, but the pacing and the lack of Ma (and her food) bridging the gap between Snow and him made their friendship seem even more shallow.

The pacing overall didn't do the story favors. Everything felt rushed. Lucy Gray and Snow's romance felt like it was going through a speed-run and felt even less realistic than the book. Not the biggest romance person, but they could've added a little more there. They barely kissed except for once on screen.

Pacing was rushed at the start and things felt like they dragged at the end. But I liked how the Games themselves were restructured, it all felt like it made more sense and the quickness actually helped. Plus it added to the cinematic feeling to have the games end with Lucy Gray taming the snakes with her song than dragging things out with Reaper, and Reaper got a heroic death keeping the flag over the dead tributes he laid to rest.

Uh, what else... The added scene with Gaul after Lucy Gray wins, and having the entire school chant to let her get out Lucy Gray from the Arena, was... bad. Like, awful to sit through, and not just because of how cheesy it was.

Yes, Lucy moves the people in the Capitol and entertains them with her songs. But she isn't a revolutionary figurehead. That's not the point of her character. She sings to survive, not to make people stand up and demand change, not like Katniss would in the future. (Plus, these games get wiped out from record afterwards regardless, showing how little impact Lucy Gray truly has in the world of Panem.)

I get that it's because it'll make things dramatic and cinematic, but that scene was unnecessary. Gaul is already portrayed as being cruel and disliked because of this, we don't need a school full of chanting students questioning her authority and morality to add to that.

Plus it just looks bad that we have a dark-skinned black woman be seen as the cruelest and evilest character Ever, who is someone the main character (a white man) must stand up against so she stops being So Evil and Cruel to a lighter-skinned woman of color. Viola Davis is amazing in the role, but that added scene screams misogynoir by pitting her as the ultimate evil versus white boy Coriolanus, making him a white savior in the process.

Stripping the nuance of the characters played by actors of color seems to be a running theme in this film, actually. Or hell, some of them like Clemensia disappear entirely from the film. Would've loved to see her all fucked up from the snake bite and still trying to Mentor, her dynamic with Coriolanus was great.

Overall disappointed they watered down Lucy Gray and made her less spunky, plus took away a lot of her agency during the Games, too. Lucy Gray's dialogue/way of speech is so fucking awkward for a human to say aloud, so props to Rachel Zegler doing what she could with what she's given. Love her and love Lucy Gray.

Of all the characters that survived their massacre in the movie writing, Tigress was good. I liked her, even if we didn't see the full extent of her worry and what she does to help keep her family afloat. Plus her last line in the film, telling Coriolanus he looks like his father is chilling, A++

Uhhh, another positive? I liked the music. Bluegrass is a good choice for all the songs Lucy Gray sings, and Rachel Zegler has a fantastic voice. I'll definitely keep my eye out for the soundtrack later.

Cinematography was great. The fact they went to film in Poland to get a lot of the nature scenes and the Arena was worth it, it looks gorgeous on screen. Costuming was fantastic. And all the actors playing the tributes each gave them such wonderful character and personality no matter how little screentime we got of them, they're all so talented!

I overall liked the movie and found it enjoyable to watch. But the pacing and twisting of character motivations, a lot of which was used to prop up Coriolanus further and paint him as a more charitable protagonist, soured things for me.

[the73rdpostscript]

Smarter people than I can say this better, but there's something REALLY specific about the anti-colonial film RRR getting Oscar noms while the anti-colinial film The Woman King was snubbed.

[lemememeringue]

my therapist says I'm doing much better <3

[andyxcds]

okay 🫡

tw: for discussion of SA

mary’s treatment in so many marauders fics is just str8 up dreadful, even in several popular fics. she’s usually objectified which, as much as i love it, was a trend started by ATYD. Like I know why the author did that; they wanted to write a sex-posititive female character and wanted a realistic portrayal of 1970s misogyny. Sirius objectifying Mary isn’t portrayed as a good thing, but it’s not condemned by the narrative either? Mary doesn’t need to go on a whole monologue on Sirius’ mistreatment of her, that would probably come off as pretty corny, but so much of her role is centered on being a support for Remus/Sirius. She doesn’t seem to have many flaws or goals or anything going on internally, which could’ve helped in making her a more well rounded person so we could take Sirius’ words with a grain of salt. And while this isn’t as extreme of a problem as it is in other fic, it did start a trend where Mary is just kind of the “hot popular chick who does all of the emotional labor for two of her male friends but doesn’t seem to care about anything outside of that”. Not saying Mary can’t be hot or popular or sleep around the problem just comes when that’s all she is. And many fics don’t even afford her that so she just turns into a shell for people around her.

the whole ‘Mary being a tool of development for male characters’ is especially disgustung when ppl depict her SA in fics. I don’t think I’ve seen a single depiction of Mary’s assault that was actually focused on her, esp esp in popular fanfics. Mary, the victim, becomes a conduit for the reactions and development of the men around her. Which is just like….fucking insane to me lmao. Sexual assault in general is one of the most traumatic events a person could go through, but since this is also most often written as a hate crime (Mulciber specifically going after Mary bc she’s a muggleborn) that adds an entirely different layer of sickening that ppl just?? Don’t engage with?? Because a victim’s SA should be used in service of development of male blorbos ig. Instead of the actual victim herself.

This also bleeds into my opinion on Mary and oblivation. I actually like the Mary oblivating herself headcanon. I think it’s unhealthy, irrational, morally dubious, extreme, and something someone in her position would do when pushed to the absolute limit. It’s compelling! But apparently ppl are fucking boring bc some ppl hc her being oblivated by dumbledore??? For some fucking reason???? Why would he ever do that???? It literally makes me want to tear out my cuticles seeing ppl rather rip away a woman’s agency than have to be conflicted by a character for five minutes. Let her make bad decision instead of no decision at all!!!

Christ this fandom doesn’t know how to write women

First off, this fandom revolves around men and male relationships, and that is evident in the fact that 70% of this fandom's works are made up of M/M fics. It's been like this for years, and to each their own of course. But when you bring up the undercurrents of misogyny portrayed in fics, people claim that it doesn't exist and they just prefer more gay relationships. That's okay, but don't dismiss the fact that you use female characters as a catalyst for your coming-of-age-esque relationships. ATYD (especially it being one of my first and favourite fics) was a prime example of pushing the dumb-hot-ex-girlfriend agenda through Mary. The author did very bad for never resolving her attachment and detachment to Sirius, or even explaining that being a young girl in a 1970s Scotland boarding school will mess with a woman's mind, and hell, no one else called bullshit so we ran with it.

Oh, don't mention the sexual assault of a black female to the crowd. It's not about her right now. They don't really care. They haven't cared for the past twenty years and the misogynoir is really showing up and showing out! When they cannot give her any other trauma due to the fact that they have provided her no goals and prospects and no real battles and actions, they go ahead to give her one of the worst they could find, then make sure to leave it at that. Can we talk about how fast they resolved the assault? Can we talk about how Sirius and CO. has fucked up the lives of many women but has been brushed under the mat because this is a wolfstar-centric/jegulus-centric story? No?

I've said it before, and I will never stop mentioning it, the microagressions Mary faced with the heavy agressions is what makes me even more pissed at her story. They take her emotional vulnerability (the effect of being a black young muggle in the 70s who portrayed herself as being sexually positive and active, play around it and spit her out) and turn her into a plot device when she's just as valuable as every other male character that is being written. When she was given the chance to have something for herself, do some damage after all the damage was done to her, we gave the blame to Dumbledore? Like I know we blame Dumbledore for everything, but are you going to take away the only thing this woman has done of her own selfishness and make it a man's?

Write those mlm fics if you want, but if you cannot make female characters as dimensional as every other male character, shut the fucking laptop. Give these women motivation. Give them anger and make that anger real and feasible. Make them selfish. Stop embarrassing yourselves!

[cagandante-communistoide]

maybe i'm stepping out of line here but a cis algerian woman being called a "biological male" to slander her in post is just as much racism as it is transmisogyny. a lot of transmisogynistic rhetoric is in fact, misogynoir in a new shirt is it true that it invokes the specter of a grotesque mockery of "real womanhood" by being too masculine? yes. except "real womanhood" here means whiteness. women of color are always by default degendered in a similar way that transfeminine people are. it's not transmisogyny hitting the wrong target, it's the same racism we've always faced the whole time. we are denied the status of "woman" when it would benefit us because we are physically deemed unfit for it by RACE. it does not fundamentally matter if she really does have an abnormal karyotype or not because a white cis intersex woman would not have been discussed this way (i'm saying this as an intersex POC)