#mindy kugel

[wooshofficial]

okay obscure blaseball ships lets gooooo:

bevan wise/annie roland: based on my specific interpretations of them where bevan was a human who ended up becoming a wizard for the fae court and annie was her knight. lots of classic chivalric pining but sapphic.

cantus hojo/mindy kugel: wivesssss. very comfortable weve been together 30 years and know each other well vibes. mindy is poly and also has a husband named bertrand and they’re cute together too.

kichiro guerra/parker meng: DISASTER COUPLE. DO NOT KNOW HOW TO COMMUNICATE. been together on and off since highschool. both alternated from the same universe and then both ended up on the worms but only together for about a season bc they both kept going elsewhere (and then kichiro STAYED elsewhere)

jenna maldonado/raúl leal: what if we were non human immortals who gave up our immortality to play blaseball together because we loved humanity and music and then one of us ended up dying and the other later gained a way to protect other players from dying.

winnie mccall/chorby short: this is a ship that my partner got me into and i love them sooooo much. they have the kinda relationship where it feels like they’ve known each other their whole lives. also winnie later getting like demon sound powers plus chorbys whole soul scream makes me go aaaaaaa

winnie mccall/patty fox: ALSO GOOD. love when there is a tiny grumpy butch and a big chill femme. patty doesnt do her own make up or nails but has learned how to so she can pamper winnie and do it for her.

also tillmikejay who i dont talk about much bc i am afraid to get ejected from a salmon cannon but i am an annoying bisexual who loves to make up other annoying bisexuals to think about. also they all have a lot of parallels in lore and sim events. slaps this polycule they can fit so much guilt and only one braincell into them.

I SEE MILLS ON THIS LIST OH BOY

Bevan and Annie - oh that’s such a cool interp!!! Before ur art I only saw the drip wizard interp so I am eating this up gimme more I wan. Moar.

Cantus and Mindy - idk much about these two but that’s so cute I love that

Kichiro and Parker - this is just me. Don’t date me I’m awful at communicating JABDKWNWKNWWK anyways I am rotating it. Maybe both the common Kichi/Allison ship could factor in where on those “off” times Kichi got into this serious relationship with Allison and then Allison died and Kichi. Does not know how to cope with that so she goes back to what she knows and Parker hates it. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaates it.

Jenna and Raúl - Raul does it all in the name of Jenna and then fucking Explodes, lol, and then they kiss in the hall the end

Winnie and Chorby - did you know that the Cas Commute (where Chorby Short and Castillo Turner were routinely EE’d for each other over the course of 5 seasons) happened during the s17 elections, a season after Winnie died? Did you know that Winnie died the SAME SEASON as Chorby joining the mills as an attractor, literally. 59 days after she was on the team. Chorby, dissociating and confused and in a new city clings to the one thing she knows (Winnie) and then that thing DIES, and she’s not even there because she’s in the shadows. This is so tragic and I’m so in love with it omg

WAIT ELI I THINK YOU MEANT SOUL INSTEAD OF SHORT. IVE SEEN THAT SHIP BEFORE I am half and half on it, because I see Chorby Soul as gay, but also in the context of how that season played out it is SO tragic and I eat that shit up. Basically I like both ships

Winnie and Patty - oh that’s cute! See I ship Patty with Hatfield Suzuki in the infamous Patty/Hatty/Ana polycule but I can so get behind this. Sometimes you are a slightly workaholic chef and your chill demon gf has to tell you to get some fucking sleep oh my god. But then she dies and you join the lineup in her memory (I can’t remember if Patty took Winnie’s spot in the lineup but it would absolutely hit if that turns out to be true).

Tillman and Mike and Jaylen - I like to think of this disaster trio as “Mike Townsend Has Two Hands” because while Till and Jay are friends, Till is straight up a gay man who wants to kiss him some baker lips, and Jaylen does not find Tillman attractive in the slightest. Mike Townsend’s bisexual ass, however, finds both of them hot and will gladly give them both his baker lips to smooch. Theyre cute as hell.

[soupsnakessss]

Shana Tova from Mindy, her kugel, and from BJ who liked this post so immediately. ❤️🍯🍎✡️❤️

(And TY @heartcm for the clutch screenshot!)

[lenasai]

bonus points if you tell me in the tags under which circumstances they would drink vanilla extract

[blazeball]

ALSO. SOBBING. AYANNA DUMPINGTON REPLACING MINDY KUGEL. FALLS TO MY KNEES. ayanna is average but its definitely a downgrade. IM SO SAD.

[elifinchsart]

wives

[Image ID: A drawing of Mindy Kugel and Cantus Hojo, two middle aged women from Blaseball. Mindy is a Jewish woman with long curly hair that is partially dyed orange and pink. She is wearing a worm on a string as an earing. Cantus is a Japanese woman with short hair. End ID]

[waveridden]

Cannonball and Mindy, on being new to the Core.  Written for Blasetober, day four: Feedback.

Calling the Core overwhelming is like calling water wet. Everyone here is nice, in a way that makes Cannonball want to scream at all of them. They’re all asking questions, the same questions with different words. Is she getting settled? How is she? Do they need to call anyone? Does she need to call anyone? What does she want to do?

In order: no, bad, no, maybe, go back to Miami. But there’s no point in saying that. She spent the last couple of years in San Francisco, and she doesn’t even miss it. She wants to go home; she can’t go home. It’s as painfully simple as that.

Jolene helps get her set up in a room — even in the midst of the chaos, there are still ILB apartments hiding away somewhere — and then wisely leaves her be.

If it were a good day Cannonball could be social. If it were a good day she would introduce herself, explore, try to make a friend, try to ask about what it’s like being on the team, ask if they’re all actually mechanics in the traditional sense, ask where she can fit in. But it’s not a good day. It’s not that feedback physically hurts, but she’s exhausted anyways, and she just wants to curl up and—

Someone knocks on the door. Cannonball has to resist the urge to groan. “Not now.”

“Just dropping off some cookies,” says a voice Cannonball doesn’t recognize. “I certainly needed them after my feedback.”

She pauses, weighing the pros and cons. She doesn’t want to make a bad first impression, but she also doesn’t want to hole up in her room forever. She’d made a conscious effort to get along with the Lovers, and it had helped. Maybe it’ll help here too.

“I’m allergic to coconut,” Cannonball says cautiously.

The other person laughs. “None of that here, sweetheart. You want me to drop these off?”

“No, hold on.” She takes a deep breath, heaves an even deeper sigh, and gets to her feet. “Be right there.”

The woman on the other side of the door is older, wearing an eye-searingly pink blazer and leaning slightly on an equally eye-searingly pink cane. Cannonball likes her immediately, because of that and because of the cookies, but also because of the warm smile. “I’m Mindy. Would you like some company?”

Cannonball aggressively does not want company. But she smiles back. “Sure,” she says, and Mindy beams. “Gotta warn you, this place is pretty barebones right now.”

“It always starts that way,” Mindy says, unperturbed. “It’ll be home before you know it.”

[coremechs]

Mechs by how well they could eat a baseball

Mindy Kugel: 3.5/5. Would commit to turning it into something actually edible, losing significant points for time taken from receipt of baseball, but points gained for style and digestability.

Kelvin Drumsolo: 2.5/5. Despite not having teeth or a digestive system capable of eating a baseball, has desperate need to be loved and validated. Attempts to consume will be slow, painful, and difficult to watch, if ultimately successful

Adelaide Judochop: 1/5. Will try and give up immediately. Captain Judochop: 4/5 for appearing from nowhere, throwing the ball so it bounces off a wall, runs down a gutter, gets kicked by a passerby and lands in front of someone, causing them to pause to look at it moments before a washing machine landed right where they would have been had they continued walking, both saving their life and distracting everyone from Adelaide not eating the baseball.

Cannonball Sports: 4/5. While not designed for eating baseballs, got in the habit of it while peckish a few years ago while taking on the Pillars’ pitching machine. Pretty good at just chomping down. Unclear what nutritional value she gets from this.

Zoey Kirchner: 5/5. Just melts them. Any attempts to debate whether or not this counts as eating are liable enough to end in melting that most people just count it as eating. Honestly it’s close enough to digestion, even if the ball isn’t near where a regular humanoid’s stomach would be.

Gia Holbrook: 0/5. Does not have a mouth. While she will put it in the blender that is often her head, she is neither persuasive nor intimidating enough to get away with it. It’s just chopped up! That’s not what eating means!

Jolene Willowtree: 4/5. Significant time wasted debating whether using the stable fusion reactor in her chest to destroy it counts as eating. Once he has won that debate it’s over in seconds but she’ll spend like twenty minutes arguing about it so points deducted for speed.

Shirai McElroy: ??/5. Apparently Shirai learned that there were people going around forcing the mechs to eat baseballs and promptly disappeared. No one has seen her in weeks. Will be ranked whenever she reeappears.

Kelvin Andante: 0/5. Theoretically entirely capable of eating a baseball but has too strong a sense of self-worth.

Ilane Snart: 2/5.

(surgery was required immediately after)

Jasper Ji-Eun: 5/5. Does not eat the ball himself but will pretend to be confused, thank you for it, take it and leave and then give it to Kalbi to play with when she’s off-duty. She also won’t eat it but hey, at least she’s a real good dog.

Mira Lemma: 6/5. Just chomps into that thing like it’s an apple. Asks for another one. Could happily live off an all-baseball diet. It is fascinating and terrifying.

[taketheringtolohac]

The Breath Mints. lost in the first round of the playoffs yet again, which is disappointing but i think there needs to be attention paid to HOW we did it.

it’s a pitchers duel between Mindy Kugel and Winnie Hess. both great pitchers, both underhanded, it’s honestly pretty evenly matched between the mechs 2 batters left and the rest of KC and it’s the fifth game of the series- whoever wins will make it to the semi-finals.

its the bottom of the second and theres been no hits, but suddenly! a recently chomped Marco Stink hits a dinger! classic for the bug! however this is BAD, Mindy has underhanded, but not to worry! He strategically hits it into one of the Meadow’s big buckets and it effectively makes it 0 runs. score’s still 0-0 and its fine. doing great.

the rest of the game is tense, theres hardly been any hits on EITHER side and we’ve made it to the top of the 9th and there’s STILL been barely any hits. but Winnie’s never been great under pressure. she is often scared of plastic bags that come tumbling through the field, horses are just like that, and sometimes, she gets startled. but Winnie, a creature of habit, does what she does best, and Gurgie’s Gia Holbrook.

now you may be thinking, well that’s fine! Winnie gets gurgies! Blood for the Blood Horse! 

well, while this is usually the case, this PARTICULAR series was the WORST time to Gurgie. The Mech’s have a team modification from their evolution prior to the breach called Maintenance Mode, which means that whenever someone has been impaired on their team that team will get a fourth out for the REST OF THE GAME. 

Winnie, realizing what she’s done, tries to hold it together, but she can’t. She’s trying to figure out how to fix it and she lets in two singles from a scattered Adelaide Judochop. There’s two outs on the board and she just has to keep it together, but she lets up a double from Gia and they score a SINGLE run. its not too bad, she can come back from this. two more outs is all she needs, the batters can get one run she’s sure of it, and she throws the ball. she’s watching it go and Adelaide hits a sacrifice bunt to Jode Preston. Two Runs. she’s trying to keep it together on the field but she gets a little sloppy, luckily its a flyout from Gia to end the inning.

It’s up to the batters now, and the pressure is ON. Jode hits a single to start out the inning, she’s not here to play games she’s here to WIN. Twooney’s up to bat, she’s had a rough go of it these past few days- her hittings fine but she’s still a bit shaken from her near death experience the final day of the regular season and just how CLOSE of a call it was- but she steps up to the plate and hits the ball! She reaches on fielders choice, not what she wanted but she’ll take it. Marco’s up to bat, she watches him get strike after strike and hit two fouls, but she’s BUBBLING with energy. She’s DESPERATE for this win, an outlet to try and overcome her anxieties and how much she just wants to PROVE she can win this game. She steals second, the crowd goes wild and Marco looks at her wide eyed as he strikes out. It’s up to Kina, ey’re not a great hitter but Twooney knows shi can do it. Kina racks up two strikes, and Twooney can feel that itch coming back. Mindy throws a ball and Kina looks worried, Twooney takes a deep breath and BOLTS to third- and she MAKES IT. She looks at Kina, and smiles. It’s up to hir now. Kina steadies herself and looks Mindy right in the eye and...

HITS A SINGLE, GETTING TWOONEY IN TO GET THE BREATH MINTS ON THE BOARD.

Kina’s on first, leaving the Val Games replica to take em home but it doesn’t pan out like the Mints had hoped. The game ends 2-1.

Now the THING is, had this been a normal game, the Mechs SHOULD have lost. If Winnie hadn’t gurgied, the Mechs wouldn’t have been able to hit the sacrifice bunt that got them the second (winning) run of the game and it would’ve gone into extra innings. And what’s more, had Mindy not been underhanded The Breath Mints would’ve WON that game 3-2 ANYWAYS. it really was just a series of unfortunate circumstances (and the Mechs superb pitching combined with their two player star line up) that made the mints lose again.

But god. What a game.

[simpingforthehunt]

Shabbat Dinner

Pairing: Jonah Heidelbaum x Reader

Premise: Jonah, Y/N, and their daughter Mina go to Ruth's home for Shabbat dinner.

Masterlist

requested by: three different anon asks XD

word count: 612

A/N: Still feeling ill, but I managed to pull something together. The next fic will either come Thursday or Friday, it depends how I'm feeling tomorrow. Hope you enjoy this one and sorry it's so short :)

The smell of falafel greeted the guests as soon as they entered Jonah's childhood home. The five-year-old was excited to see her Safta Raba again, eagerly gripping a picture she drew during kindergarten earlier that day. The picture consisted of stick figures of her, Jonah, Y/N, and Ruth together as a happy family. It had put a smile on her parent's face, and they told her that her Great-Grandmother would love that as a gift.

"It's beautiful, sheifale," Ruth knelt down to hug her great-granddaughter. They all followed Ruth to the kitchen, who placed the drawing on the fridge under baby photos of Jonah and Mina. 

As Y/N put a bouquet of flowers into a vase, Jonah handed his Safta a potato kugel he made for the dinner. "Safta, would you like any help?"

"It's alright, bubbeleh," Ruth waved off Y/N's offer. "Just sit and relax. We'll light the Shabbat candles soon."

Jonah took it upon himself to help Ruth despite the old lady's protests and took over the falafel. The adults listened as Mina told Safta Raba about her week at kindergarten, as the kid coloured in a notebook her parents brought. "And then Tali and I put on a puppet show for our classmates! We managed to get Evan to be Haman."

"Did your friends enjoy it?" Ruth asked, giving the kid her undivided attention. Mina nodded happily and continued talking.

As soon as the sun began to set, the family gathered around the Shabbat candles. Jonah held Mina in his arms so she could properly see everything at their eye level, and she immediately moved to cuddle her Aba. Y/N lit the Shabbat candles as per Ruth's request, and they recited the brachah for the candles, wine, and bread.

Once they sat down for dinner, Jonah put food on Mina's plate and cut it up for her before serving himself, and they dug in. Mina was mostly quiet through dinner, scarfing down the food. This allowed the adults to converse, and Ruth was telling them both more gossip in the Jewish community, heard from Mindy Markowitz. "Mrs. Schlosstein has been spreading rumours again. Something about Y/N and a second child on the way. Is that true, dear?"

"Actually," Y/N's hand instinctively rested on her stomach. "It is."

"We were hoping to tell you ourselves," Jonah laughed, taking his wife's hand.

"How far along?" Ruth's eyes were shining. She had been nagging the couple for four years to have a second child, and it was finally happening.

"Three weeks," Y/N answered. "We found out last Sunday."

"I'm going to be a big sister!" Mina said between bites.

"And you'll be the best big sister ever," Jonah commented, wiping the kid's face.

Ruth couldn't get over her excitement for her second great-grandchild and was taking extra care of Y/N for the rest of the evening. By the time it was eight pm, the family had migrated to the living room and Mina had fallen asleep while cuddling her dad on the couch. "We should take the munchkin home."

"Call if you need anything." Ruth saw them to the door and gave both of them a hug. After handing Y/N leftovers, she gave Mina a light kiss on the cheek and sent them on their way. 

As Jonah strapped his daughter into her car seat, he couldn't help but think about how lucky he was. After retiring from Nazi-hunting, the Jew didn't think he would ever be able to have a family. Looking at his daughter and knowing his wife had conceived once again, he felt grateful for the life that he had.

[clonerightsenthusiast]

okay concept for a blaseball fic bc maybe if i write it down ill actually write the thing:

- christian combs is the captain of the space pirate ship The Pillar. cb “cannonball” sports is his first mate; gia holbrook is the navigator/part-time ship AI; mindy kugel is the quartermaster; mira lemma is the chief engineer

- the s21 elections grabs the five of them and swaps them with the blaseball versions

- now the pirates have to learn how to play blaseball (they’re not very good at it) and the blaseball players have to learn how to be pirates (some of them are probably very good at it). all of them have to now deal with AU versions of people they know

- probably some level of all of them trying to find a way to get back to their original universes that is ultimately futile

- in the pirate verse Captain Judochop is a rival pirate captain. everybody else is also there but this one is important.

[elifinchsart]

Mindy Kugel, my favorite blaseball player that people say "who?" in response to.

[elifinchsart]

oh worm?? 

I think Mindy is like a cool art teacher. If you need someone to talk to she's here for you and provides a space for the Worms to hang out and do art therapy. She/they Bi. Talks with their hands and gives very good hugs. Her house is covered in junk to be used for future art!  Also love the idea that her house is just a mess with  knick-knacks and things to be used for art and there's always at least three stray cats and a couple of players hanging out.