#might make this my twitter header

[sapphsquid]

Hello lgbt community

[clippy]

dunno if I ever shared this here but, regardless, I found it again today and it's making me want to explode.. it's so cute and I love Clockboy so much and would give anything to do this irl 🥺😔

[chuluoyi]

𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐋 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐒 !

- gojo satoru x reader // zen'in naoya x reader

you are an empress perfect in every way... until your husband suddenly casts you aside for his expecting mistress. but you won't be dethroned just like that, because the newly coronated western emperor, gojo satoru, sets his sights on you, and thus your revenge against your ex-husband begins...

genre/warnings: 18+ suggestive content—minors do not interact!—might be ooc, kinda slowburn, angst to eventual fluff, divorce, marriage of convenience, heavy pining (from gojo's part), childhood friends trope, mentions of infidelity, misogyny, infertility, explicit smut

note: loosely inspired by and taking some elements of manhwa remarried empress (but i promise you, it's different). my god, for the past month this is all i can think about *sobs* wc. 10.5k ! this is the longest thing i've ever posted here, and if you'd give it a chance, then i'll be really, really thankful!

credit header goes to @/gojokko in twitter!

next. the crown of diamonds | long live the empire

general masterlist | series masterlist

“I accept the divorce.”

Your perfect life was done for. Everything you had worked hard towards— it was now in shambles and tatters.

You, an ethereal, revered empress... someone untarnished in the face of public and private, had just agreed to the emperor’s blatant request of separation.

“My god... how can this be!?”

“Your Majesty! Please reconsider!”

Emperor Zen’in Naoya of the Eastern Empire, your husband—and companion for more than ten years—smirked as he looked down at you, paying zero attention to the uproar in this courthouse.

But then you heard that kind, velvety voice from the back of your head:

“If you become my empress… that will make me the happiest man alive.”

This place has turned into a whopping circus ever since you and Naoya stepped inside anyway. And so, having nothing worthy left to lose, you declared, “And I demand an immediate approval for my remarriage.”

Your boldness once again stirred a wave of clamor among the crowd, and even Naoya was glaring at you in disbelief now. “A remarriage…? How dare you—!”

“Well... is it the time for my grand entrance?”

Deep from behind the curtains, suddenly he emerged, dressed in the most lavish robes befitting his own throne, outshining everyone in the room as if he was the one owning the place.

“Heh.” His low chuckle stunned even the mass as he took big strides towards where you were.

This would seal your fate. From now onwards, you would no longer be the perfect empress. Your messy divorce and remarriage will relegate that image to history.

“My goodness, that’s…” the woman in the front gasped. “Western Empire’s…”

“Gojo… Satoru?” Naoya's eyes lit with genuine fury as the other man took his place by your side. “You couldn't possibly mean…!”

You interrupted him regally. “Yes, he is the man I wish to remarry.”

This event was going to blow up tomorrow, with scandalous titles no less than The Deposed Empress Remarries! And there was no going back, ever.

How did your pristine life turn into such a shameful debacle? None of these turn of events would be imaginable for you several years prior...

SATORU, THE CROWN PRINCE OF WESTERN EMPIRE

To Satoru, you were more than just the east’s breathtaking empress—you had captured his attention long before you ascended to that role.

Seven years ago, you were the renowned noble lady, the paragon of perfection sought after by many lords and monarchs alike.

You were both cunning and fair, pretty in the face, came from an illustrious family known for birthing famous empresses in either western and eastern empires. You were the quintessential template that mothers advised their sons to seek in a wife.

The fairest in the land—that was how people called you. And Gojo Satoru is always and only interested in the best.

“Suguru... look at her.” His eyes would soften at the sight of you as he nudged at his closest ally and confidant, the duke. “She is so... pretty, isn’t she?”

Unfortunately, you had been promised to the Eastern Empire’s crown prince from a long time ago too. There was little that the outsiders, including himself—even if he was the heir apparent to his own throne—could do to sway your heart.

“There's more to women than their faces, Satoru,” Suguru sighed, thinking that what he had was a mere lust. “Moreover, she’s engaged to the Zen’in... and they have a very good relationship. Nothing you can do about that.”

“Hmph.”

To be honest, he couldn’t fathom what you could possibly like about that murderous Zen’in spawn. He was a pompous human being, no less.

How on earth could you stand someone like that? Satoru had always wondered… especially when it was well-known to the land that you and him were on good terms despite your arranged marriage.

—and once, he thought he knew who you are…

. . .

Satoru swallowed the bitterness rising in his throat as he attended the royal wedding of you and Zen’in Naoya. Despite hating the circumstances, he had to admit it was a fairytale wedding—albeit with the wrong groom.

You were the epitome of picture book princess. In his eyes, and in the eyes of the attendees of your wedding.

Oh, and he made headlines too, that day—

“My princess, may I have this dance?”

Two hours hadn’t even passed by after you swore your vows as Naoya’s bride, and there he was, asking for your first dance, in your own wedding ball, right in front of your newly wedded husband.

Everyone bet on you turning him down and making a fool of himself, but instead, to spare his feelings, you put your delicate hand in his, and with a wide, shy smile, you said, “Yes.”

Satoru thought it was his greatest achievement then. To have made Naoya red-faced, to have made him watch as he put his hands on your waist, twirl you around— and come one breath away from your face.

“Princess, you’re…” his breath caught as he pulled you close, staring straight at your face—and suddenly he felt like life was so unfair to him as the slow melody of waltz was all he could hear.

How could you be this close... and yet so far by being somebody else’s wife?

And yet he forced the words out, with sincerity he had never showed anyone else before, even as his heart bled and shattered. “You’re so incredibly beautiful.”

Your eyes widened, sparkling with wonder, before you thanked him with the loveliest of smiles. “Thank you. You’re too kind.”

Satoru was certain... you had ruined him, because no one else would ever be able to turn his world with just a smile like you did, even as you broke his heart too into a million pieces.

. . .

Ever since that day, everyone had branded him as a prince in search of scandal—coveting the princess married to Zen’in clan.

What everyone didn’t know was that it went beyond that. His obsession of you went beyond your beauty and charms and wits. Rather, it goes a long way back.

YOU, THE CROWN PRINCESS OF EASTERN EMPIRE

As inconceivable as it was, once upon a time, you and Naoya were a truly, happy couple.

Handpicked by the late emperor to become his son’s wife, you couldn’t be more proud. With you being the next empress of the Eastern Empire, your clan once again proved itself that it was always worthy of a seat in the monarchy.

But beyond that, you were elated that it was Naoya that you ended up marrying. Your own childhood friend, who often led you around his palace by hand and filled your days with many joy and laughs.

“One day soon, when we are the emperor and the empress—” younger Naoya was always someone who had big dreams about ruling his nation. “We will create a nation in which no one can do anything as they please! We’ll establish order, and anyone who goes against it will be punished! That way, it’ll encourage fairness!”

Not knowing it yourself, you had given your heart wholly to him. You had agreed to all his dreams and visions. You devoted yourself to them all, even more so after your marriage and coronation, as he promised you an ever after.

“From now on, it’s going to be me and you, Empress.”

YOU, THE EMPRESS OF EASTERN EMPIRE

“Your role is to give an heir to the throne, Empress.”

Your title had never sounded so heavy to you before now, especially when Naoya was the one saying it.

You sighed, gathering your wits and scattered feelings before levelling your calm gaze on your husband. “I understand that, Your Majesty. But it is not something that I can do on my own.”

This year would mark the fifth year of your marriage to Naoya. You understood that the fact you still weren’t able to be with his child would raise questions from the court, but still, must you be reminded of this fact over and over?

Your husband—no, the emperor—barked a satire laugh.

“Oh, really? As I understand it, being infertile is not something I can help you with.”

That hurt. It was a searing pain, like being branded with a red-hot iron. And it felt as if he had torn through your chest with his fist alone.

“I’m not infertile.” Your eyes gleamed with pure defiance as you lifted your chin, facing him in his audience chamber.

It dawned on you that lately, one of the few ways you could speak to him was by requesting an audience as opposed to your usual midnight talks in your private chambers.

When did it start to change? Or was Naoya this kind of person right from the very beginning and you were just blinded by love back then?

"Oh? And what would you call being childless for five years then?" Naoya sneered at you from his dais, placing one hand on his jaw. "Bad luck? You must be terribly cursed with misfortune then."

You fisted your dress, summoning all your strength to hold back tears. Don't you dare cry. Not in front of him.

It wasn't as if you didn't want to carry his heir. For many women, holding their baby in their arms is a cherished dream, and when they hold a position of power like yours, it becomes not just a desire but a duty.

You tried everything—calling in the best doctors, consuming horrible potions, even consulting with the oracle. And they all said you were perfectly healthy and fine. You were at your wits end too.

The irony. You were celebrated in public for your competence, while privately, you suffered your husband's cold detachment and cruel remarks.

. . .

"Empress, where should we put the welcome gifts?"

You studied the floor plan of the banquet hall for your annual New Year's ball with a thoughtful hum before pointing at the entrance.

"Place it here. We want our guests to know that we are generous, and it's easily accessible since the parlor is the first area they reach after arriving."

You loved planning festivities. It was therapeutic in a way, and it gave you little time to think of anything else.

"Oh, and I want to have a welcome arch and flowers placed at the entrance too. This is the grandest event of the year, second only to the Emperor's birthday... we must display the grandeur that befits such an occasion."

Your head maidservant, Hanabi, placed a hand on her abdomen and nodded with a warm smile. "That's a very clever suggestion, Your Majesty! I'll ensure they arrange everything just as you wish!"

As she scurried away, you watched her with an assessing gaze. Hanabi had been with you throughout the five years of your marriage, always at your side, assisting with day-to-day matters and serving as your confidant. She was a great aide.

And you were observant by nature... so of course you noticed things.

...and if you were correct, then she was most definitely with a child.

The thing is... she is unmarried. You hesitated to jump to conclusions without evidence, yet the timing struck you as more than coincidental—it nagged at you for weeks now, suggesting a connection you hoped did not exist.

Because if they really did... then...

You didn't dare to think, because it would be more than a nightmare. But you weren't able to let this go either, so you did what was necessary.

You planted a note in Hanabi's chamber, and then you waited in the gardens, the chilly midnight air wrapping around you like a shroud.

You had done everything you could. Five years ago, you let go of everything and had decided to spend your life with your first love—Naoya.

Because you truly and devotedly love him. You give your all for him—for your life together.

"Ooh, Your Majesty~! It's so cold out here, why not in our usual—"

Hanabi's voice faltered as soon as she saw your crimson gown, feeling like the world had collapsed on her. And you rigidly turned towards her, feeling more or less the same.

And yet, what you had received from him is the greatest betrayal.

SATORU, THE EMPEROR OF THE WESTERN EMPIRE

He first realized something was clearly wrong with you during the New Year’s ball that you hosted.

Satoru had just been crowned emperor during this time, and though rulers typically sent envoys to such grand celebrations due to concurrent festivities in their own lands, it had been several months since he last saw you. He wants to see you.

A meritless action, but he wanted to, regardless.

But that day, you were a fantastic actress in this stage called banquet hall and nobody was the wiser… but he would know, because you mattered a lot to him.

"Your Majesty, you don't seem well." He approached you with a glass of champagne, affixing a friendly smile. "Is there anything amiss?"

Taken aback, you didn't expect such close proximity that you took a step back. His smile almost faltered, but he kept it up.

"Emperor Satoru—"

"Ah, none of that, no. Address me just as you usually do, hmm?"

A smile finally tugged at your lips. "How is that fair, when you address me so formally?"

Satoru chuckled. "You, my queen, deserve all the finery and grandeur there is. And I will see to it that you do."

That was his nickname for you ever since you ascended the throne. Both of your countries refer you as “empress”, but he loves addressing you as “queen” instead.

There was a shift in your expression, and he thought you looked melancholic. It bothered him, stirring a desire to erase that somber look from you. Because above anything and everything, you had to be happy and smiling.

"You're still a flirt, I see, Satoru," you remarked, throwing him a soft smile. "It won't do you good if you're seen with me most of the time, you know."

No, I’m doing this just for you. He wanted to tell you that, but he sighed instead. "You've got it wrong. When I'm in the company of the most beautiful woman in the lands, what's there to be ashamed of?"

Perhaps hearing that finally melted you a bit as you freely giggled this time, and Satoru was glad that he made you laugh even a little.

"You would think that, huh..." you fondly mumbled. And then your expression crumbled, and he could've sworn something painful flashed in your eyes—

What happened to you? He so desperately wanted to ask, but then he saw that preying gaze on both of you. Zen’in Naoya. Satoru clicked his tongue as he watched him weave through the crowd, his gaze locked ominously on both of you.

“Seems like we don’t have much time, after all,” he began, urgency sharpening his words. “But rest assured, whenever you want to talk to me, just send a little birdie my way and I shall answer.”

“Huh?” you blinked at him questioningly, totally not getting what he meant.

He winked, then took your hand and placed a kiss on it, eliciting murmurs of surprise from the crowd at his bold gesture. “And chin up, my queen. You have nothing to fear, and if it makes you feel better...”

He leaned in to whisper in your ear, “To me, a diamond is most beautiful. And you… are one that sparkles above all.”

“Naoya, unhand me this instant!”

You were tired of this shit, of Naoya always manhandling you—of him always having a total control over you.

After seeing how close you got to Satoru, Naoya practically saw red. Still, in the prying eyes of public, he remained unperturbed, but his vice-like grip on your arm was sure to leave bruise as he unkindly led you out of the ballroom.

"Naoya!" you raised your voice this time, even louder than before, uncaring even when the wandering eyes of the servants curiously followed the two of you.

You were not made an empress just to follow him. And with that conviction, you forcibly pulled your arm away from his grip right after he shut the door to the drawing room close, not even wincing at the stinging feeling.

His eyes shone with anger. “You insolent—!”

“No—” You stood your ground, and suddenly you got very irate and burst out, “How dare you, Zen’in Naoya!”

He looked at you with equal surprise and mortification, clearly unprepared for your righteous tirade.

"You have made a mockery of our marriage! You have insulted me and your own throne by carrying on with— with the help! My maid!" you screamed at his face, pure anger coursing through your veins. "How could you!?"

Naoya took in your outburst with eerie silence, a sneer slowly forming on his lips. "You get riled up over that? Have you forgotten emperors are free to take mistresses, especially when the empress isn't capable to bear any heirs?"

A burning arrow shot straight to your heart at his response but you willed yourself not to show it. "Regardless, you could've done better and not put our throne to shame by fucking a servant."

"I've told you time and time again. A woman's duty is to bear children, and since you've proven yourself beyond barren, I did you a favor."

"A favor...?"

"As soon as Hanabi births that child, you can raise him as your own," Naoya frankly stated unabashedly, as if proud with his idea. "Saves you the trouble and I get my heir, a win-win solution, no?"

Raise him as my own...? Saves the trouble? You could've sworn that throughout your entire life, you had never been so insulted before now, right in this moment.

"What I do, I always have my throne in mind. And yet you..." his eyes narrowed into unsatisfied slits. "What are you trying to achieve by whoring yourself to that rake, Gojo Satoru? Are you telling people of the ton that you're having an affair?"

His voice made you want to throw up. The realization that everything you thought you had together might have meant nothing to him at all made you feel sick.

And so, hiding your trembling hands and swallowing you unshed tears, you responded to him with a clipped tone—

"You're most despicable, Naoya. And you are a complete fool if you think even for a second that I'd want to raise your bastard!"

He seemed taken aback by your rejection, but you didn't falter. "And oh, since you want to make use of that lowly maid so much, feel free to take her back and track her down yourself, because I've sent that wench away."

With that, you turned your back on him, striding out with your head held high, even as your life crumbled into dust.

Days after your full-blown argument with Naoya, your situation only worsened. By now, even the palace servants knew you had incurred his wrath, while Hanabi had won his favor by carrying his child—possibly the heir to the throne.

The child she was carrying was no threat to your position. After all, you were the empress. A child of your blood would trample over any bastard.

However, you'd be damned if you shared a bed with him again, and Naoya made it clear that his mistress would be elevated to the rank of royal consort. Given the current trajectory—and history's tendency to repeat itself—emperors often divorced or banished their empresses in favor of their mistresses.

Bah. You could only scoff at your laughable predicament. You came from a prestigious clan and were revered, yet now you were no more than a scorned woman.

Dark thoughts consumed your mind for a time—you couldn't deny that you had considered leaving the palace for self-imposed exile or even ending your life. However, reason always prevailed.

You wouldn't give Naoya what he wanted most: your compliance. And around the time when you resolved to do that, a finely decorated envelope arrived at your study, with no signature whatsoever.

Intrigued, you opened it to find an intricate dried rose bookmark and a folded letter nestled inside.

Greetings to you, my queen. Yeah, it's me. Hope you won't be too surprised. But if you do, know that I always mean well.

Satoru. You weren't expecting this. A small smile tugged at your lips. How long had it been since you last smiled so freely?

I've heard you love reading, hence the bookmark. Fun fact: I made it myself, with Shoko's help. She is sooo bad at explaining though so if the flower is wrinkled... please blame her.

This time, you giggled. He was an emperor, for god's sake. Should someone of his station write so informally like this?

Now... I'm no oracle, but even I know that you must be having bad days. And so, let me entertain you with several tales from my kingdom. So, the other day, my good friend Suguru, the duke—you must've heard of him surely (they said he is the most handsome bachelor in the West but they must be missing an eye for saying so because clearly I'm more!)—just fired a pair of his servants because he caught them in a thirst! He is so uptight! Why can't he let two people in love be!?

Before you knew it, you found yourself chuckling at the lines upon lines of anecdotes Satoru had penned in the letter. The way he wrote, it was as if he was right here, saying all of this to you in real-time. For a while, you were completely absorbed in the world of the Western Empire he described, and all your worries and anxieties seemed to fade away.

Okay, that's it for now. This is just a teaser actually, so if you want to subscribe to more tales of my humble little country, you can always be my empress reply to this letter! :D Look out for a white cat near your windowsill during the hour of snake—he is my trained pet, and put your message in his little backpack. Don't worry, he's cute and doesn't bite!

You were so giddy by the end. His message warmed your heart so much that your eyes grew misty. In the aftermath of Naoya's betrayal, you were certain your life would be filled with much sadness to come.

Yet, your friendship with Satoru might just be the thing that would save you.

No matter how much his friends Duke Geto and Countess Shoko urged him to see reason—that you were no longer available and occupied with your duties as the empress of your own empire—Satoru couldn't help but still cast an eye your way.

You were clearly unhappy, and to him, someone as radiant as you should be happy.

And so, that was why he took his quill and started writing that letter to be sent to your place, along with a rose strapped inside.

He knew that, being the kind person you were, you would most likely respond, but still, the moment his cat arrived back with your reply, he was elated beyond measure.

Of course I knew it right away! I omitted your name because who knows who might catch your cat on the way. Anyway, I hope Mr. Cat will arrive back to you safe and sound. Firstly, thank you for your letter. I must say I'm so happy to receive it :) I haven't had best days so reading it made me smile. And secondly, of course I'll subscribe to your stories of Western Empire. I've been wanting to visit it myself but just haven't gotten the chance to... so if you will continue it, I shall be happy to read :D

If anything he wrote brought you joy, then Satoru was content. He had achieved his goal then.

And it was his own little secret that... by corresponding with you, it allowed him to savor the feeling of having you as his own, if only through words.

Mr. Cat's name is Sugu-chan after Suguru but you can call him whatever you wish. And don't worry, he is strong and can fight if necessary! And don't be too formal with me, my queen. We have known each other forever. Anyway do tell me, what is your favorite color now? Let me guess, is it still that specific shade of crimson?

You name your cat after your best friend...? And you're making it hard for me to be less formal when you always address me as queen! Hmm, I suppose so. I love burgundy. I've even had my study designed with that exact color scheme. It just gives me the confidence I need, you know.

So you still love burgundy... I'll keep that in mind ;) Frankly, any shade of crimson suits you—you're always a vision in them. Back then and especially during your coronation. I love blue, so I think we're a match? :D

Back then...? Hmm, surprisingly yes, red and blue would make a good match... Anyway, I believe you promised me unusual tales from your 'humble little country', so please indulge me!

You've forgotten it already? Around the time we first met, back when I was still known as "the cursed prince"? It holds such importance for me but sadly it seems like it was just a passing moment to you :( Oh, yeah, I haven't forgotten about it! So, this time let me tell you about the time when Earl Nanami got wasted . . .

Days turned into weeks, and weeks into months. Amidst the turmoil of your marriage, exchanging letters with Satoru became your sole respite. His stories regarding his own empire amused you, and sometimes it got you to wonder what it was like to live there.

However, running away from your problems would never solve them. Writing to Satoru may have helped you to cope, but still, your real issue with Naoya wouldn't vanish simply just by ignoring him.

. . .

"Your Majesty..."

For a good one minute, you stood still. Your lady-in-waiting had delivered an earth-shattering news—but admittedly, a possibility you thought was in the cards the moment you went against Naoya.

"His majesty has summoned the high priest to his study," the elderly woman added, close to tears. "But it is very likely that he has submitted the petition for—" her voice faltered when she caught sight of the emptiness in your eyes, unable to continue.

A divorce. Naoya had been considering a divorce. And by now, he was set on it.

"I'm so, so sorry..." she choked out, her voice breaking with sorrow to mourn you, but you remained expressionless, lost in your thoughts.

The last time an empress of Eastern Empire was divorced was more or less a century ago, because she had committed a grave treachery against a royal consort by poisoning her. She was sentenced to death by hanging afterwards.

The irony. You were in similar situation, only that you weren't vengeful enough to resort to poisoning Hanabi. Speaking of her, her baby was due in another four months, and now she was living happily in Naoya's quarters.

"Don't be. I'm perfectly fine."

To consolidate his illegitimate child's position, Naoya used the most effective way. Since you wouldn't listen to him, and Hanabi must be a far delightful companion rather than you, he was more than willing to cast you aside in favor of making her his empress instead.

You thought it would hurt more, and yet what you felt the most right in this moment was white-hot anger. This is unacceptable. It was the greatest insult to you both as a woman and as the empress.

Now, all you could think of was how to uphold your dignity and plot your exit from this palace with your head still held high.

If I can't be the empress here...

And after a sleepless night, you came to a daring solution. And your plan—

...I'll be one somewhere else.

It was an invitation, Satoru thought, almost in disbelief. Or it sounded a lot like one, didn't it?

Heart beating a little faster and blushing, he reread the latest letter you had sent him.

It's only the beginning of summer, and the heat is sweltering... I'm considering treating myself to a trip to the winery village on the border between the east and west. I think it'll be nice if I have a companion...

Winery village was right in the middle of the western and eastern empires, and it was a safe zone. Vineyards were vast and thick, but it wasn't exactly a popular vacation spot. So, it intrigued him why you would want to go there.

Just as he was about to reply to you that it was a very good coincidence that he too wanted to pay a visit to the said village, suddenly—

"Gojo! Gojoooo!" Shoko suddenly burst into his study, startling him.

"Shoko! What the heck?!"

Lady Shoko might be a countess, but she, Satoru, and Suguru all attended the same royal academy. Despite their prestigious titles now, Satoru insisted that in private, both Suguru and Shoko address him just as they did before he ascended the throne.

Still, she was ruder than Suguru in many ways. Satoru gave her a stink eye, but his confusion grew as she seemed to be delivering momentous news.

"Gojo, have you heard that Naoya will divorce Y/N?!"

"Wha?" it felt like a ton of bricks suddenly fell down on his head. And then his friend proceeded to tell him everything she knew.

"It wasn't made official yet, but even the townsfolk have been talking about it. They also said that Naoya have taken a mistress, and that she was formerly the empress' maid."

Satoru listened to her in silence, but the moment he heard that the Zen'in spawn planned to divorce you, anger flared within him. And to add insult to injury, he two-timed you with a servant?

The fucking bastard. He never deserved you at all. How crushed must you have been, enduring all this shit?

"Now, I wouldn't normally encourage you this," Shoko took out the cigarette she stashed in the folds of her dress and sighed. "But since you never let go of that weird fixation on her, should the royal divorce happen..." she shrugged as she took a seat in front of him.

"No matter how laughable it is, you might have a chance."

She is so right. These long years of longing for your affections and dreaming of having even a minute more of your time... there was now chance to turn it to reality.

When you arrived at the winery village for your vacation to breathe in some fresh air, honestly, everything was still in shambles.

You couldn't forget the horrified looks from the court when Naoya announced the divorce. Most were shocked and pleaded with him to reconsider. Some from your circle of ladies even sobbed, openly stating that you didn't deserve this fate.

“Empress... His Majesty shouldn't be that harsh...” Hanabi had said to you afterwards, seemingly concerned for you. “Your legacy here… I’ll make sure to carry them on.”

Sometimes you didn’t know whether Hanabi was pretending to be dumb or indeed she was. One thing you knew though...

“I wish you luck on that, Hanabi.” You looked down at her with eyes as cold as ice. “Beware, the Emperor is fickle, be sure to not run out of entertainments.”

You knew you deserved a better fate than being the empress of the Eastern Empire, but seeing those who still cared for you made you solemn. Your loyal maids, those who supported you... and what about organizations you've spent time and energy to?

“My queen, ah, there you are.”

Satoru's voice from behind startled you, interrupting your daydreams. He quickly came beside you and extended his hand, asking for yours.

You offered him your right hand, and he promptly pressed a kiss on it, his bright blue eyes gazing up at you.

It wasn't as if you just noticed how pretty his eyes were, but now that there was no ballroom and scrutinizing eyes around you, you couldn't deny that the way his eyes sparkled as he gazed at you—solely and purely on you—made you breathless.

What... would it be like to have this man... to be your husband instead?

"I missed you. I know we talk daily through letters, but seeing your beauty firsthand is always a sight for sore eyes," he cheekily commented as he let go of your hand. "Now, I get to see you without your pesky husband around, and yeah, you never fail to make my silly heart race."

You chuckled. "You always flatter me..."

He only gave you a toothy smile, and you two strolled the vineyard. For a while, you talked about nothing of importance, like where your ladies-in-waiting were, how things were from his side.

"How do you find being the emperor?"

"It's tiring! It's boring too to look through accounts and oversee those trivial state affairs! And not to mention how many people have been nagging me to take a wife soon!"

"Oh? You haven't been on the lookout already?"

"Nah. No one is good enough, I need someone already familiar with state affairs and such," he said, wrinkling his nose sourly at the thought. But then he cast his eyes on you.

"And frankly, you are my standard," he fixed you a meaningful smile. "No one comes close. If you weren't betrothed to the Zen'in back then, I'd have proposed you in a heartbeat."

Thump. Thump. Thump. Your dead heart suddenly came to life. Gojo Satoru had just confessed his affections for you so candidly, and it got you thinking how much easier your life would be with him. He would love you, take care of you...

And beguile you.

His eyes fondly crinkled at you. "You are everything I desire in a woman to be my wife."

He adores you so easily, so fluidly... and yet, Naoya, who has you fully, is throwing you away.

Satoru observed how your face fell once again, just as it had during the New Year's ball. And now he knew, it was because you were facing your impending divorce.

But he wasn't going to tell you that, instead, he would willingly be your confidant and offer you his very being. He was about to crack a joke to lift your spirits, when you blurted—

"What if I said... I want to be your empress?" you kept your pace, not looking at him at all. "What if I said... I'll leave everything and come to you?"

Huh? What…?

That was loaded. Have you entertained the thought too? Satoru had craved the very idea for so long he didn’t even miss a beat—

“Then I’d marry you.” His voice was straight and true, shooting straight to the most tender part of you that Naoya had torn to shreds. “If you become my empress… that will make me the happiest man alive.”

No hesitation. It almost reduced you to tears. You stopped where you stood, willing yourself not to tremble. There is still one person who sees this much value in you.

“Then I’ll be yours,” you breathed out. “I’ll be your empress, Satoru.”

Satoru could've sworn time had stopped. If one moment ago, you looked like you were about to shatter, now you were a vision of the dignified and perfect queen he had always known you were.

“I’ll be your queen— your everything.” You declared, locking eyes with him, the intensity of your gaze not escaping him.

How many years had he dreamed of this moment? How many long nights had he endured, yearning for you, knowing you were beyond his reach?

Finally, finally... Satoru grinned, swearing to all the divine beings out there that he had never known how liberating it was to finally have what he wanted. “That would be my greatest honor.”

He drew you close—you let him—and after one second of taking in your enchanting eyes, he crashed his lips against yours.

His lips started soft and gentle, then became fiery as his tongue met yours. He pulled you closer, one arm around your waist and the other holding the back of your head. You responded eagerly, pressing against him, fingers tracing his neck and feeling the lines of his undercut.

One is finally having the woman he had wanted for so long, and the other was plotting her escape from her misery.

You were using him. He knew it. Yet, he didn't care. Hidden behind bushes and vines, you shared your very first heated kiss, aware that this moment would leave its mark as both the greatest stain and triumph in your lives.

And when he finally pulled away, lips swollen and wet, with a wolfish grin, he promised you once again—

“Give me everything that is yours... and I swear on my life, I will do everything to turn your life into a living dream.”

“Empress, your husband His Majesty the Emperor, has requested a divorce.”

It was how your once pristine life transformed into the scandal of the century inside the courthouse.

"If you accept this petition, then you will no longer be the Empress of Eastern Empire. You will lose all the rights you have as a senior member of the imperial family..."

You donned your finest attire—the intricate crimson and black dress you had designed and commissioned the dressmaker to create. Today, faced with Naoya's divorce decree, it would be the last time you adorned the colors of his empire.

"The ties that bound you together as husband and wife would be severed—"

Good riddance, you thought.

"If this is not what you want, you have the right to—"

"I accept the divorce."

Your voice cut through the heavy solemness of the witnesses and turned them into a mass of disbelief. You disregarded Naoya's smirk and held the priest's gaze. "And I demand an immediate approval for my remarriage."

The crowd was in for a second wave of uproar when you boldly stood your ground, and they erupted into clamors once again when Satoru made his grand entrance and took his place beside you.

"You—!" Naoya was so furious that he roared. "This is my empire!"

"And?" Satoru challenged with a dauntless smile. "I'm here to propose, and since she accepts your divorce request, I believe she has no relations with you any longer and is free to marry someone else."

You remained motionless, until your cold fingers met warmth when Satoru linked his hand with yours reassuringly.

"This is treachery! I won't fucking permit it!" Naoya hollered as he faced the high priest, who had a grim face while observing this three-way headlock between the three of you.

"Emperor Naoya, that matter falls into the jurisdiction of the church." The high priest let out a sigh and then turned to you, assessing your calm gaze.

Regardless, Naoya paid him no mind. "I refuse to grant you any permission to remarry! You will be banished to the cold palace until the rest of your pitiful days! Not only do you fail miserably by being barren beyond help, you also dare to whore yourself—" he was now rambling curses at you before everyone in the court, and it pierced you deeply—

Until Satoru tugged you behind him, so that you wouldn't have to see his face any longer.

"High priest!" Satoru's voice blared as he clenched his jaw, irate at the string of profanities directed at you. "Do you still truly believe that the deposed empress can't remarry? When she has suffered through this man's downright betrayal?"

Your head was spinning. You wanted this whole ordeal to be over already.

And thankfully, even the high priest saw reason, that you were undeserving of this debacle. In the end, his words held more weight than anyone else's, even Naoya's.

"I accept Empress Y/N petition to marry Emperor Satoru!"

In the chaos of the courthouse after the high priest granted your wish, Naoya shook his head in disbelief, looking at both of you with intense disdain.

"You've always wanted that wench, haven't you, Gojo?" Naoya cackled with a malice you would never have expected from someone who had been your husband for ten years.

You had tuned out all the noise. This dumpster fire was too much even for you. But then, you felt a strong arm enveloping you, sealing your fate as the match made in this courtroom—

"I have, yeah," Satoru replied with a smug grin. "And now that she is mine... it's just the beginning of your downfall, Zen'in."

Your wedding banquet in Western Empire lasted a week long.

True to his promise, Satoru spared no effort to make you happy. The moment he brought you to his palace, he ordered immediate plans for wedding celebrations. Make it grand, make it unforgettable... he took charge himself.

And on the final, seventh day, as you were about to be formally crowned as the empress of the western lands, you were stunned.

"This is your coronation dress, Empress," your new lady-in-waiting, Shoko, said with pride. "Gojo— I mean, His Majesty, specifically has his late mother's dress altered to suit you."

You promised yourself that you would no longer wear any shades of crimson. As much as you loved the color, it reminded you too much of your homeland and Naoya. No matter how much you despised him now, once upon a time, he was everything you loved and more.

And you thought you couldn't possibly love another color until you saw the extravagant navy dress in your chamber. Made of luxurious satin and adorned with literal diamonds, it shimmered under the light and flowed gracefully with layers of brocade cascading to the floor.

To give you something so valuable... You had expected to enter into a marriage out of necessity, but your new husband had no intention of ceasing his ways to win your heart.

If it's with him, maybe... just maybe...

Today is the day.

Satoru sat on his throne before his court in the grand hall of his audience chamber. His hair was pulled back, and he was dressed in his official attire, robe of silk and a crown made of pure gold.

Next to him, another resplendent crown adorned with jewels and diamonds shimmered in the light—the empress' crown. Your crown.

Today was the day this empire would truly acknowledge his queen. He stole a glance at you on his other side, and his breath was taken away.

With your hair tucked into an elegant updo, you were the very vision of a fairytale queen. You were incredibly stunning, almost otherworldly— shade of blue suited you as much as crimson did, just as he thought.

This day would go down in history. But before that, he would ensure that the news would reach Zen'in Naoya. He would spite him so hard.

"Today marks a momentous occasion. We gather here to celebrate not only my marriage and my new wife's coronation," Satoru glanced at his audience with a smirk, his expression widening as he spotted his best friends Suguru and Shoko. "But also the start of her reign... and as we know it already, her fame and beauty are second to none."

The crowd burst into giggles, clearly aware of his scandal at the Eastern Empire's courthouse. And even you smiled.

Satoru shrugged, playfully rolling his eyes. "Spare me, I'm a newlywed, after all. Anyway..." His gaze shifted to the intricate crown, a relic of his late mother's, and then back to you. "Come."

You knelt before your new husband, bowing your head. The whirlwind journey from the East, your remarriage to Satoru... It had all felt surreal until this moment. Now, the weight of reality settled upon you, almost shaking your very core—

But just as the thought crossed your mind, Satoru placed the crown upon your head. As the jewels settled into place and you rose to face the crowd, his voice cut through the air:

"And here I present to you, your new empress!"

The room erupted in applause, the cheers echoing around you. Everyone congratulated you without fail, and your breath was taken away.

It was a sight beyond belief, as they chanted your name, over and over again—

“ALL HAIL THE EMPRESS!”

"I have something for you!"

You wouldn't expect that you would ditch your last night of wedding celebrations along with your husband, and yet here you were, led by the hand by a very giddy Satoru.

"Where are we going?" you questioned him, your pretty dress sweeping the halls in a rush.

He turned to you to send you a wink. "Trust me, sweetheart. You'll love it."

Somehow the way he called you made your heart thump a little faster inside your ribcage. This man is really, truly, your husband now.

He was such a refreshing person, it almost made you let go of everything that molded you into the perfect empress in the east, and be just... you.

"Here." Both of you stopped in front of a grand door, and he ushered you inside. "Come, come~"

A study, you realized as you stepped inside, but then a gasp left your lips—

"How do you find it, hmm?" Satoru put an arm around your waist, proud of how the burgundy walls and mats enveloped the entire space, creating a tranquil sight that perfectly matched your taste.

It was so much like your private study in the Eastern Empire's palace. You might now hate that place, but your private study was filled with the memories of smiles while writing back to Satoru's letters and waiting for his cat to come. And to have this now in your new home...

"You remembered..." you looked up to him, almost tearing up.

"Of course I do," he pressed a kiss on your temple. "I said that so long as you're with me, I'll turn your dream into reality, didn't I?"

This man really treasures you, or at least that was what his actions had proven so far.

"You're everything I've ever wanted and more," Satoru said, wrapping his arms around you from behind in a warm embrace. "You might not realize it, but I've been in love with you since you first visited western lands."

"What?" you turned to him with genuine confusion. "How?"

"That blind boy who you led by the hand... he had no friends," Satoru sighed against you. "The first and only person who asked him if he was lost... is you."

Suddenly, you were thrown back in time to your first encounter with Satoru many years ago. He was known as "cursed" for being born with peculiar eyes, had been blind for a period of his childhood, before he awakened the true extent of those brilliant blue eyes and brought his clan to power by wielding them.

Back then, you thought it was wrong for him to be left alone, so you took him by the hand and escorted him back to the palace, unaware that he was the infamously cursed crown prince.

"You made me feel less lonely. And I thought then... someday, somehow... through some sort of miracle in which I regained my eyesight and could see you... I'd immediately ask for your hand."

But you were named the crown princess of the Eastern Empire. The thought of how crushed Satoru must have felt upon hearing the news pricked at your heart.

You felt soft, you felt loved, and most of all, you felt an overwhelming certainty that with this man by your side, you would finally experience the genuine love that had been missing from your life for so long.

"You have me now," you whispered in response.

Unlike your first kiss in the winery village, this time, you were the one who faced him and pulled him into a searing kiss.

Be it impulse, overwhelming feelings or something else... you didn't care. You just want him.

And wouldn't you know, your new husband... is also a wonderful, dashing lover.

"You're so... fucking beautiful..." Satoru's lips were on yours, claiming them with a fierce passion that left you breathless. His hands roamed your body, tracing each curves and lines.

You moaned into his mouth, clutching his robes. He captured your wrists with one hand, using the other to tilt your head back so he could leave bruises on your neck in the process, making you moan.

"Keep making that sound, yeah?" Satoru rasped, his hot breath giving you goosebumps. "Keep me going with your voice."

As he gripped your waist, it dawned to him once again that you were here, with him.

Seeing his colors on you ignited desire straight to his cock. His empress was stunning, more so now than ever, more than any woman Satoru had ever seen.

He led you to the bed, his movements urgent yet tender. The air was thick with desire as you lay back, pulling him down with you. You arched your back, pressing yourself closer to him, craving more.

This wasn't your first time, yet you had never been this excited before. From heated kisses until somehow managing to get rid of your underwear and left you in your dress... your body nearly thrashed in response.

"Look at you... An queen of two empires, yet rendered putty in my hands," Satoru wickedly grinned as he slipped a hand under your dress, rubbing his thumb teasingly over your clit. You let out a soft sigh at the prodding. You were getting wetter by each second... and Satoru felt his cock straining against the tight material of his dress pants.

"More..." you pleaded, arching your hips. "More...!"

Any of your wishes would be his command, so he pushed two fingers inside you at once, and you let out an erotic gasp. Satoru was so close to tearing his pants off by seeing how tight you clenched around his digits.

Breathy moans fell from your lips with each harsh brush of his thumb over your clit, his fingers fucking you fast—

"Satoru...!" you shuddered, gripping his shoulders as you became limp and came into his hands in spurts.

"My queen..." he then captured your lips in a brash kiss, and you reciprocated it. He pulled away only to press his forehead against yours in an attempt to calm his raging heart. "No matter what."

His watery, sparkling eyes was mesmerizing to you, and you took one breath before you crashed your lips into his, tangling your fingers in his hair, pulling him closer.

"As pretty as you look in this, I'm going to take it off," Satoru murmured with a meaningful smirk, slowly undoing the laces of your dress. "I want to see you completely naked... just for me."

Soon, you laid bare, and the cold air made your body shiver. Satoru clenched his jaw tightly at the scrumptious sight.

It was almost difficult for him to take in all of you at once—your flushed cheeks, swollen lips, erect nipples, and legs spread wantonly for him. Satoru had been here so many times in his dreams, and to see it becoming reality...

"If back then, you had chosen me instead—" he sounded almost heartbroken, which startled you. "I would have treated you right from the start—"

You looked up to him. "You would..."

"Don't you know how many years... I've been just there— watching you and that bastard? Knowing I can do even more than him?"

"Mhm..."

You rose, tugging him closer, before you unclasped his robe, letting it fall to the floor. "Satoru... right now... I'm yours."

He allowed you to undress him and soon he too was out of his stuffy royal attire. Your eyes wandered on each part of his body you touched. His chiseled body, snow-like skin, and then the hardened bulge that sprung out the moment you undid his pants—

The sight of his cock alone only turned you on even more. You gently gripped the glistening head, running a thumb over the tip before gliding your hand towards the base of his length. With a gentle rhythm, your hand moved from base to tip in a slow, teasing motion... before pecking his head.

"Yeah... you're right." His eyes never left yours, admiring you as if you were the most precious gemstone, before catching you off guard. While you rubbed him, he snaked a hand around your waist, pulling you so that you tumbled on top of him.

You moaned loudly as his cock—big, both in length and width—entered you, his hands gripping your thighs to spread them apart so he can shove himself deeper.

You felt so, so full, as you pulled Satoru to you tightly, groaning into his shoulder. And he started to set the pace, moving against you.

"Ahh," you moaned out shakily, fingers clawing into his back. To him, the sounds you made drew him in like a siren's song, it made him throb inside you. "Ahh—hngh!"

"Feel good?" he asked, voice sultry and deep, as he thrusted into you particularly harder, causing you to stifle a moan. "Let it out—hah—sweetheart... I want to hear you, hmm?"

And you did. You felt hot. Your unabashed, nasty sounds with each thrust drove him to the edge. With every lift of your hips, you squeezed him so tightly it almost made his head spin. His breaths came in short pants too.

"You fit me so damn well," he groaned, holding your hips hard enough to leave imprints of his fingers. "So fine..."

One woman. It took just one woman—you—to unravel him like this.

"Satoru, harder—" You commanded, wrapping your arms around his neck even as you trembled. "N-not enough... harder!"

He actually had to swallow, because you and your pussy felt so damn tantalizing. "As you wish, Your Majesty."

He slammed his hips against yours twice—no, thrice the previous speed, and you incoherently squealed. The squelching sound of your hips slamming against each other, and the immense wetness coming out where you two were joined... it was clear: you were addicted.

"Did Naoya ever make you feel as good as I do you now?" he drawled, sinking into you impossibly deeper, squeezing your left mound and flicking your right nipple at the same time. "Did he... ever make you ride him like this?" And then he instantly regretted his words.

Because the moment he said that, you felt cold, reminded of nights in which Zen'in Naoya grabbed you just to forcefully breed you. You winced, and Satoru caught it.

"I..." you shifted your gaze away from him, and he could've sworn that it was sorrow he saw flashing in your pretty eyes. "I-I... don't want to talk about him..."

Feeling remorseful, Satoru reached for the back of your neck and pulled you to him, kissing your lips softly. "I'm sorry—"

"You don't have to—"

"Tonight, I'll make you scream my name so hard you'll forget him," he promised as he pulled away from you, his eyes darkening. "Tonight, give me everything and I'll show you how a man truly loves his woman."

And he followed through. He worshipped you meticulously, treating your body with the reverence one might bestow upon delicate glass. He peppered kisses on every inch of your skin he could reach, lips and tongue trailing down, his relentless thrusts so well-paced and brutal at the same time.

"I'm— close!" You whimpered, and yet still grinding your hips against him. He was watching your every move, every wave of pleasure that was evident on your face— committing it to memory for those moments when he couldn't hold you close.

You gasped—as a mind-blowing orgasm then ripped out of your very being, your hips faltering as you surrendered to ecstasy with a cry of his name, coming all over him. "Satoru... Satoru! Ahhh!"

And Satoru kept his gaze on your face as he too busted inside of you hard, feeling himself filling your womb with his essence, his hands kept your waist steady, memorizing the way your lips part and the way your body went limp into him with satisfaction.

Dear heavens, I love you. The sight of you was nothing but perfection, and with everything he had, he was very sincere when he said—

"You're flawless, sweetheart."

2 MONTHS LATER

"If you give me a son, I'll throne you as the empress right on that very day."

The Eastern Empire's palace was bustling as the royal consort's screams echoed through the halls. The day Naoya had been eagerly awaiting had arrived—his mistress was delivering his heir.

Yet unbeknownst to him, whispers in the dark suggested the royal baby was arriving suspiciously early. Many, still mourning the previous empress who had been dethroned so abruptly, were not exactly thrilled with this turn of events.

"My lady, just a little bit more!" the maid encouraged. Hanabi strained once again as the pain peaked and her body spasmed, letting out the loudest wail as the baby finally slid out of her.

"W-what... is it?" on the brink of passing out, Hanabi asked anyone who might hear her. She had to know, for she was so close to obtaining her throne—

"It's a girl, my lady!" the midwife announced.

What?

Her world crumbled at that very moment. A girl? A girl can't be the heir!

She wanted to sob, to utterly mourn, and right at this moment she was full of fear, because if Naoya knew—!

Like a curse, he suddenly made his presence known in the birthing chamber. His face scrunched in distaste at the scent of blood filling the air. He took one look at Hanabi, tearful and frazzled after the ordeal, then turned to the midwife, who was trembling at his presence.

"A baby girl, Your Majesty."

In that instant, fury flashed through him. He shot everyone in the room a glare before his eyes settled on his consort, full of spite.

"You useless tramp."

Your life with Satoru in Western Empire was wonderful.

He was everything Naoya was not. Satoru adored you, prioritized your well-being and happiness, often humored you, and made your days an endless delight.

And dare you say... you had begun to return his affections as well.

How could you not? Everything he did, he did with you in mind. He eased you into your position so seamlessly, and soon you found your place comfortably at court.

"He is mixing pleasure with his kingly duties," Suguru grumbled, watching his best friend order the gardeners to plant more blue roses simply because you mentioned finding them beautiful earlier. "Empress, you have to keep a tight grip on his leash."

"Well, at least he's happy." Shoko shrugged and nudged you. "Can't you see by now? How much of a loser he is for you?"

You did see him—a man who showed you everything he had. He had given you everything you unknowingly needed.

And you just wished... you could return the same for him. It still made you bitter, knowing you might never be able to give him heirs due to your condition.

. . .

"Sweetheart... what's on your mind, hmm?"

You looked up to him as he pressed a kiss on your cheek, an arm securely around you, sweaty and panting after your steamy session.

With his hair down and messy after you yanked him earlier, your lips curved into a genuine smile. "You look hot like this, you know?"

He clicked his tongue. "Hmm, I am, of course. But no use in changing topics, I know you well enough now."

Your bare body was pressed against his chest, fingertips tracing gentle lines on his skin.

"There's a possibility that... I can't give you any children." You almost felt ashamed saying this to him, unable to look at him in the eye. "I-I... I've failed for many years—"

"Hush," he silenced you with a finger to your lips, his expression firm. "No thinking that, yeah? I don't care."

"But—"

"Children are gifts," he said then, caressing your face tenderly. "It's not up to us to control how it'll take or not. And I married you not because I want heirs or such—I love you, you know?"

Your glassy eyes met his, and you willed yourself not to shed a tear.

He grinned cheekily. "Besides, you've felt it yourself—my sexual potency is undeniable. And I don't believe for a second, that you're what that bastard claimed you to be. I bet he's the one who is impotent—"

"Satoru! You're so obscene—!" you giggled freely and poked his chest.

At that time, you were just relieved that he didn't mind. Though it was still weighing in your mind on some days, you felt a newfound sense of liberation compared to when you were still in the Eastern Empire.

But you were in for another plot twist. Perhaps Satoru is correct, and your doubts are unfounded...

"Ugh..."

Your stomach churned in discomfort, a sickening nausea that seemed to twist your insides and threaten to force its way up. This had happened for days now.

You wanted to find a physician before Satoru was aware of your state. You didn't dare to hope or speculate, because you were tired of it by this point. You just wanted clarity.

Yet, the physician's words left you speechless.

"Your Majesty... it seems that you are with child," he remarked in wonder as he assessed your vein. "Yes, definitely. You are with child."

It was a revelation you hadn't expected. For years, you had been convinced that you were unable to conceive, but now...

You were carrying a new life. Yours and Satoru's.

You felt like bursting with joy as you made your way to his study. Your heart swelled with an overwhelming sense of happiness. Above anything else, you were eager to share this news with him—

...until everything you had known turned on its axis once again.

Right before you went past the ajar door, you saw a glimpse of your husband and his most trusted confidant, overhearing snippets of their conversation:

"Satoru, however you look at it, this is tantamount to declaring war," Suguru sighed, clearly at odds with his perspective. "It's not wise."

"We can finally put an end to them this way," Satoru's tone was steely as he moved a chess piece across the map, positioning it on the border between east and west. "No better time than now."

"The Empress will face the greatest backlash from this. They'll accuse her of being vengeful enough to provoke an attack on her home country—"

"On the contrary, her presence will encourage those still loyal to her to defect. That's why I have her here. We need defectors—"

You let out a choked gasp, backing away from the door in shock. For one good minute, you refused to comprehend what Satoru was implying.

. . .

. . .

Did your new husband... marry you for his own hidden agenda?

[siyzuii]

⨳ 　 ʾ apps/sites 4 shifting 　 . 　 ♡

hi! this will be long but i made a list of apps/sites that might be helpful for your shifting journey. reminder that you don't need these to shift but they can be helpful with manifesting, keeping track of stuff, etc.

enjoy! divider cr

NOT SPONSORED BTW LMAO

﹒ 　 ⊹ 　 🝮 　 OO1: NOTION 　 ✩

description:

basically notion is an app for documents and stuff. i have to say this one's relatively known and it's such a huge life saver and i know that probably everyone knows about it already (as they should) but i'm gonna recommend it once again.

useful for:

scripting

dashboards you can add life goals & stuff here you can look up some templates/ideas and see what i mean LOL

cons:

i personally can not think of any major ones because this app is just that good

you do have to make new accounts for the text ai generating feature but i don't know if anyone would use that

additional notes:

i personally love how customizable it is! like you can make each page have a custom icon & header, add widgets, images, and so much more. it is so so so insanely helpful for scripting i'm telling you. or you can just be basic, that works too. there's also a bunch of script templates online including specific ones (like a better cr, fame dr, fantasy dr, fandom-specific drs, bla bla bla) and it's literally the only thing shifttok is good for imo. i'm a big fan of shifterium's templates but there's other people who make them as well and i'm sure you can find some recommendations!

★ 　 ₊ 　 ➲ 　OO2: CANVA

description:

a website + app where you can design stuff from headers down to presentations, posters, covers, etc..

useful for:

album covers for singer/idol drs

book covers for writer drs or something

fake social media posts but there's better apps out there and i'll list them here as well

and much more!

cons:

a lot of things (most of which i think are the good stuff) are paid but you can find similar replicas if you scroll long enough i guess..?? and there's a free trial but i don't know if that helps

additional notes:

definitely my favorite place to go when i need to design something tbh. there's a bunch of templates you can use and the layout is very easy to navigate through! and it's pretty easy to find free alternatives for the paid stuff you do have in there

₍ⁿ⑅..ⁿ₎ 　 ˇ 　 ⩩ 　 OO3: PARROT 　 ❀ 　

description:

parrot is an app where you can record yourself saying literally anything and play it on a continuous loop

useful for:

affirmations (manifesting??)

cons:

i'm pretty sure it's iOS only

additional notes:

personally i haven't used this app (i don't like my voice so i will not be recording myself saying affirmations thank yew) so i can't give it a rating but from the looks of it and based off of recommendations i've seen it's pretty useful. should be a white icon with a pink circle that has a white parrot in it!

≥≤ 　 ﹕ 　 ⤷ 　 OO4: BEHINDTHENAME 　 ◍

description:

a site where you can generate names & even life stories if you choose it (including height, weight, blood type, birthday, nationality and more i think?? at least it gives those for me). you can choose from different cultures and stuff like fantasy & mythology.

useful for:

finding a name & info for your dr self (which is literally you by the way don't forget that!) and potentially other people you'd like to script in

cons:

it really just helps to make a basic profile of a person so the things you can do with it can be a little limited

additional notes:

i prefer using this site for ocs instead but i think it can definitely help with shifting! oddly enough it also shows like a lifespan & cause of death so.. cool i guess!!!!

✦ 　 ﹕ 　 OO5: SOCIAL MAKER/dummy

description:

social maker & social dummy are both apps where you can replicate almost basically anything from the internet from twitter posts to facebook posts, youtube posts, and more!

useful for:

social media stuff especially useful for fame drs, streamer drs, idol/singer drs and so much more

cons:

both apps were deleted so you have to have had installed them before if you want to get them back

social maker is ios only i think?

additional notes:

yeah both apps are deleted but there's alternatives out there like twinote (for twitter) photonote (for instagram) canva (has fake social media templates as i said lol) and others that you can look for (because i personally only use twinote)

⋆ 　 ᶻᶻ 　 　 OO6: HELLOFACE 　 ﹒ 　 ★

description:

basically an app for ai face swapping

useful for:

seeing what your face claim (if you have one) would look like on for example dances, fancams, interviews definitely useful for idol/singer/maybe fame drs

cons:

uses ai (i'm personally not a big fan of ai)

pretty underground so the chances that you might not like it are not low

✭ 　 　 ❒︎ 　 OO7: ROOM PLANNER 　 . 　 ♡

description:

basically what the name says. it's a 3d home designer

useful for:

making your dr room/house

visualizing your dr room/house

cons:

has paid stuff

┊ 　 ‧ 　⬭ 　 OO8: COMBYNE

description:

an app where you can combine items you like from a wide selection of stuff to make outfits!

useful for:

making outfits for your dr

visualizing said outfits

additional notes:

there's other things you can do on the app like challenges where you can compete to make the best outfit i think?? looks pretty fun i might try it HAHAHA

yuh so i got a little lazy here at the end & i know this is prolly not very helpful because most of these apps/sites are pretty well known but maybe just maybe.. i helped someone out...

HAPPY SHIFTING!!!!!

[alltimefail]

Agency Assignments: A comprehensive to-do list for saving Dead Boy Detectives!

I'm very easily overwhelmed, so I wanted to break down all the ways to help "Save Dead Boy Detectives" that I have seen floating around. This is meant to be something you can reference when you feel like there is so much you need and want to do to help, but don't know how or where to start.

Note: I will be updating this post as we go when necessary, so feel free to bookmark it in your browser for easy access, add it to your homepage, whatever! I'll always have a link to it in my Pinned Navigation post on my blog as well!

It is of the utmost importance that we fight as an organized, well-informed front. We need to be on the same page if we're going to save our show, so let's get into it! 💜💀🔎

➪ First and foremost, follow @savethedeadboys! They're going to be our best resource during this fight.

➪ Next, follow @deadboyagency for news and updates: they've been around since the show dropped and have been an invaluable source of information the entire time.

Now for some task breakdowns:

"One-Time" Tasks

➪ Like the header says, these things can only be done once. Once you do them, you don't have to give them any space in your mind.

Sign the petition*

Review & Rate Dead Boy Detectives on Google, IMDB, Rotten Tomatoes. Be sure on IMDB you don't just rate the show as a whole, but you also rate each individual episode! You can also "Like" the show on Google and click "Watched" which helps the show's engagement scores. (If there are other popular sites I haven't listed here, feel free to share them and rate Dead Boy Detectives highly on them!)

Notify Netflix customer service (through their online chat feature) that you're unhappy with the cancelation of Dead Boy Detectives. This is a short, 5-minute task that I wrote a guide on (with an example message) here!

"Repeat" Tasks:

➪ These tasks can become a part of your daily routine; do what works best for you! You don't have to do every single one of these tasks every day if that is overwhelming!

Share the petition* over and over again, on every one of your socials! Make everyone you love sign it!

Stream Dead Boy Detectives!* Keep it on a loop in the background on low volume as much as possible. Try to get others to stream it as well, especially if they haven't watched it before! Netflix cares about VIEWS: views save shows and I broke down the reasoning here. (Bonus: if you post over on Twitter about your rewatch, use the tag #ReviveDeadBoyDetectives)

Talk about Dead Boy Detectives!* You're probably doing that already, but just be sure that you're tagging your posts. Here on Tumblr use the "Dead Boy Detectives" tag at least (to boost our tag to trending) and anywhere that uses hashtags (Twitter, Facebook, Instagram for example) I would recommend #SaveDeadBoyDetectives and #DeadBoyDetectives as those seem to be the most commonly used tags! IMPORTANT: do not use more than 20 tags here on Tumblr! Any more than 20 and your posts might be marked as spam and hidden from the tags!

Create art, edits for TikTok, fics, gif sets, doodles, crafts, analysis posts, and so on for Dead Boy Detectives.* Having fun is important, too! This is an extension of the "Talk about Dead Boy Detectives" point, but it needs to be stated - don't remove the joy from the fight. If a drawing of our boys or a smutty fic with your favorite trickster cat king is what you can bring to the fight on any given day, that is a perfectly valuable contribution! It's not all emails and hashtags.

Daily request a show through Netflix. Bonus if you're signed in! (I do 3-5 times a day)

Send Emails advocating for Dead Boy Detectives (Email list & Email Template). You can do this as much as you want or just one time.

Send Snail-mail (physical letters) to Netflix advocating for Dead Boy Detectives. I also send a copy of my letters to Warner Bros. Studios. Again, you can do this one time or multiple times. There are dates set aside for "mass" mail sending as well, so check out info on that here!

Interact with articles posted about Dead Boy Detectives. Read them, share them, comment on them, thank the writer for writing them, etc. We want lots of press about the cancellation, and supporting journalists and publications will make them want to write about Dead Boy Detectives more.

NOTE: Anything marked with a * means it's extremely important; if you can only do a few things, these tasks are the ones that you should focus on first. Remember to take care of yourself. This is a marathon, not a sprint, so don't burn yourself out!

WE WILL SAVE THIS SHOW.

Say that to yourself as many times as it takes for you to believe it. We're doing this to get justice for the writers, the actors, for ourselves, and assert to these companies that diverse, queer stories are not disposable one-offs; they deserve to be told in full!

Hugs and Handshakes to you all - whatever will suffice. 💜 Always feel free to reach out if you have any questions, whether that be through private message or my ask box. I'm not going anywhere!

- V

[elumish]

My Experience With Digital-First Royalty-Only Publishing (Part 2)

Disclaimer: just my experience, may not reflect other people's

Part 1 (What is this sort of publishing; how did I get published; what does the submission, contract, and editing process look like)

Book Release:

My [redacted] book came out in April 2024. It is available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and the publisher's own website, where it is listed for a couple dollars less than on Amazon/B&N. It's available both digitally (in multiple different file formats) and for print (paperback).

I can't speak for whether this is standard across these sorts of publishers, but it probably isn't unusual. This does mean that the book can't be available on Kindle Unlimited, given how Kindle Unlimited's requirements work.

The timing for this sort of publishing is extremely fast compared to traditional or even small-press print publishing. I signed the contract in late August 2023 and sent in the final draft to my editor in late October 2023, and the book was released in late April 2024.

Book cover:

For designing my book cover, they pointed me towards where they pull stock images from and asked me to describe the sort of cover I would want, including possible stock images. They also asked for physical characteristics of my characters, which is when I realized that I had no clue what my characters look like.

The stock image website included AI art, as well as regular non-AI stock images. I specifically requested no AI art, including no AI-generated stock images. As far as I am aware, they respected that request.

Once they created one, they sent me a mock-up and asked about minor changes (typography, etc., from what I remember). I didn't have any changes. Overall, my cover looks like what I described to them, and I'm really happy with it.

Marketing:

My marketing experience with my publisher has been decidedly underwhelming. They seem to have started to revamp their marketing process right around when my book came out, so my book didn't receive/hasn't received a huge amount of marketing support from them.

What they gave me marketing-wise: a few marketing images for pre-release/post-release, including Twitter and FB header images, etc.; general marketing guidance for what I could/should be doing; a couple of mentions on their publisher Instagram post-release and a mention in their weekly newsletter

What they didn't give me marketing-wise: connection to reviewers, including sending an ARC or providing a list of reviewers that might be good to work with; marketing materials for sites like TikTok or Instragram; a meaningful amount of airtime/mention on their accounts; a large following of their own

Overall, the marketing is what is probably most like self-publishing--a huge amount of it is on me (and I am terrible at it). It will be interesting to see what their revamp brings, but they are starting from a minimal following and not a lot of previous activity on their accounts, and so they also need to build their reach to make their marketing on their accounts more effective.

Royalties/payment:

I get paid on a monthly basis through PayPal. I also receive a royalty statement that lists days, amount/type sold, etc. so I can reconcile with what they have paid me. From what I have seen this royalty statement is pretty standard.

So far, they've been prompt and haven't had issues with payments.

However, because of (among other things) their general lack of marketing, my royalty statements have been fairly low. So far (and, granted, the book came out less than 2 months ago) I have made very little money on this.

My Path Forward:

I've thought a lot about whether I will continue to do this sort of publishing. I am currently querying my "main" books, and I don't plan to publish them through this sort of publishing, even if the publisher would likely accept them.

My contract stipulates that my publisher has right of first refusal for the rest of the books in this series. I am currently writing book two, and I plan to also write a third, as I had initially discussed with them. Beyond that, I'm not sure. I don't mind working with them as a company, but I don't know if they have the processes in place for me to make money publishing with them.

One thing I will likely do is explore other romance publishers that accept unagented submissions. They have a much lower barrier of entry and they are often willing to accept books that trad publishers might not want to spend money/reputational risk on.

As such, I would likely submit to these publishers stories that I don't think traditional publishers/agents would likely to be willing to publish, including more niche subgenres and less standard lengths that are easier to publish digitally.

Why do I redact the name of my book?

Honestly because I'm a coward and because people are weird about romance, especially certain subgenres of romance. I also plan to use this account for my main agented publishing, if I ever reach that point, and I don't necessarily want those two pen names associated.

Any other questions about this sort of publishing?

[ashensgrotto]

Never Had a Friend (Like Me) - Part 2

Original art piece by pfbatakopd on twitter (Used only for Header. Do NOT REPOST ORIGINAL ART)

Part 1 Part 2 (You Are Here) Part 3

YandereSoulmate! AU:

Part 1 (Am I Feeling Love?)

Part 2 (Protective)

Part 3A & Part 3B (Poor Unfortunate Souls)

Characters: Azul Ashengrotto X F!Reader

Word Count: 9,105

Synopsis: A chance for redemption comes in the form of a wish…

Author’s Notes: Ok, here we go. I received an anonymous message in my inbox for the next part of the Yandere!Soulmate series and I was actually going to work on it - but with the arrival of GloMas, working on the next part of ‘Raison D’être,’ wanting to finish “Weren’t You Aware, Angelfish?”, AND the holidays, time got away from me and I forgot about Scarabia’s segment for a short while. 

However, because you all seem to enjoy this and want to know if the tako has redeemed himself - I figured I would work to get this part done. Now, warning - Pompefiore’s part is going to take a bit of time to complete because I will have to wiggle my way through my memory bank and replay a few parts of it (which is approx 76 chapters in length for those players who haven’t made it that far into the game yet) since I’m working so deep into Ignihyde’s chapter right now (which is a doozy - I’m still in chapter 67-tower 1, oof help).

This one is also going to be split into three parts - I promise it will not be a long wait for the second & third parts as this is my Christmas gift to all of my readers <3

Thank you all for your continued support!

Warnings are as follows: yandere behaviors, manipulation, imprisonment, & hypnosis

***

… Mister Kalim, sir, have a wish? Or two? Or Three?

I’m on the job, you big nabob.

You ain’t never had a friend like me.

***

“Well done, Jade,” Azul praised, “How did the ‘talk’ with Kalim go?”

It was the first night of being in Scarabia in the vacant room the Grim and (Y/N) had originally been held hostage in. Apparently, it was routine in Scarabia to have all of the students locked within their dorm rooms - hence the reason as to why the concept was foreign to both Grim and (Y/N) as the two of them never felt the need to lock their doors at night (though Azul did while (Y/N) had lived in Octavinelle for security purposes - but he would never tell her to begin with.)

True to his word, Azul started sniffing around straight away, using Jade to talk to Kalim while he and Floyd distracted Jamil with a game of mancala.

“It was just as you expected, I’m afraid,” Jade answered, placing his hands behind his back as he gave his report, “It’s very likely that Kalim is being magically mind-controlled to make him act out erratically.”

“That would explain the sea otter’s rapid changes in behavior,” Floyd nodded in agreement.

“But how is that even possible?” Grim asked.

“Grim, that’s like asking how you can stomach twenty cans of tuna in twenty minutes,” (Y/N) answered, looking toward the trio, “I’m assuming it’s similar to your ultimate magic, Jade.”

“To an extent, yes,” Jade nodded in agreement, “The closest you might get would be with Ruggie’s ‘Laugh with Me.’ That ultimate magic allows Ruggie to manipulate a person’s body to do what he wants them to. There’s also hypnosis magic that works in the same sense, but it takes control of a target’s mind and requires a far higher degree of skill and power. Very few mages are even capable of using it because of the amount of skill required to even cast it.”

“You gotta have skills and power on par with Azul for that,” Floyd added.

“But even I would be hard-pressed to control living creatures with their own egos like humans,” Azul argued, “I still prefer to give them the chance to think it over before signing one of my deals.”

“But I doubt anyone in Scarabia is half as good as you, Azul,” Grim piped up, “Even Kalim’s big signature is just a glorified waterspout…”

“Grim, ‘Oasis Maker’ is a very talented frame of magic,” (Y/N) sighed, looking at the others, “Though, I do agree… even Jamil’s score levels are relatively average on the school’s grading scale.”

“I wouldn’t be too hasty to make assumptions,” Azul chidded, “There’s an old saying in the sea that we have in the sea which states ‘a clever hawk hides its talons.’”

“So the brings us to the big question, who’s controllin’ sea otter and why?” Floyd asked.

“I’m afraid I won’t be much help there,” Jade shook his head, “I couldn’t get any answers from him.”

“Speaking of which,” (Y/n) asked suddenly, “What exactly… does your signature spell do?”

“Oh? Have you seen it before?” Grim asked curiously.

“Only once - I think we had a patron at the lounge that was behaving quite, um… indecently?” you admit, “It was like he suddenly just spilled what was on his mind as soon as Jade got close to him.”

Jade sighs, “My unique magic is one that would make most people guarded around me if they knew what it did, specifically - I’m not a fan of revealing it, but (Y/n) hit it pretty hard on the nose. It’s called ‘Shock the Heart’ - it allows me to force the truth out of a target that might be hiding something. The drawback is that the spell can only be used once on a target - once I use it, I can’t use it on them again, and it only works on those with a weak mental vulnerability or loosely guarded minds. Those like Azul who are weary, or have high resistance to magic, are effective against the spell - hence my signature spell is very limited in scope.”

“It works great on guys cowerin’ in fear or bawlin’ like babies,” Floyd grinned, showing off his row of sharp teeth.

“The way those two smile scare the daylights outta me,” Grim looked at you, “I still can’t believe you lived with these three for three months!”

“They’re not that bad,” you mumble under your breath, “...mostly.”

Azul coughed, “Jade, what were you able to find out? If anything?”

“Kalim’s always been the type to open up to others - it’s one of the reasons why he was selected to be the headwarden. Thus, my spell worked on him flawlessly - however, when I asked him if he knew the name of the student using hypnosis magic on him and if he would tell me, he claimed that he must never tell anyone. He made some sort of promise to this student long ago, so he couldn’t reveal it.”

“Oh how hysterical!” Azul snorted, “Your signature spell was thwarted by Kalim’s strength of character!”

“It would seem that way,” Jade admitted.

“And here I thought the sea otter would sing like a canary,” Floyd hit his hand over his forehead, “Just when you think you know a guy!”

“...I would assume that it’s a promise he keeps close to his heart,” you think out loud.

Azul looks at you, eyes widening, “(Y/N)! You genius angelfish! That’s it!”

“What’s it?” you ask.

“I have an idea,” Azul answered, “I have a hunch at who our little serpent schemer is… and how to pull him out of hiding, but first - Floyd, I’ll need your help.”

“My help?” Floyd looked flabbergasted.

“Yes, I need to borrow your signature spell.”

Jade, Floyd, Grim, and you blinked in surprise.

“Azul, pardon me for asking,” Jade spoke after a moment of stunned silence, “but why in the world are you asking for Floyd’s ‘Bind the Heart’?”

“Because I intend on using myself as bait,” Azul answered.

“Azul! You can’t!” you could contain yourself at the thought of Azul stepping in harm’s way.

“(Y/n), listen to me,” Azul took your hand, “This won’t be like the last time, I promise. I’m one of the strongest mages here right now, so I have to do this. Floyd’s ‘Bind the Heart’ will allow me the protection from hypnosis when we have to face off against our little viper. I don’t intend on him gaining control over anyone any longer - not even you.”

“I hate to admit it, but Azul is right,” Floyd answered, scratching the back of his head, “As much as I hate to admit, it would give us an advantage as well.”

“What do you mean, Floyd?” Jade asked.

“I’m always goin’ off about how great my signature spell is an’ showin’ it,” Floyd shrugged his shoulder, “So, if I swap something with Azul an’ give him my signature spell - no one will know that he has it, least of all our target.”

“But you’ll have to feign ignorance, all of you,” Azul answered, “If you can’t, this trap won’t work - this is the one shot we have.”

“Alright, though I’m not really seeing where this is going…” Grim sighed, resting his paws on his hips.

“You will eventually, Grim,” Azul answered, “Now, Floyd. Are you ready? I’ll give you something that will be an adequate replacement for the time being.”

“Sure, octy - whenever you’re ready.”

“How many times must I…? Never mind.”

Azul closed his eyes and took a deep breath as magic began to gather around him.

“The song ceases, the sun sets… I extend my benevolent hand to you poor unfortunate souls… Now, to business! It’s a Deal!”

***

Azul always knew how to practice patience - it was something he learned over the years during his searches for his soulmate. He may have been desperate during his childhood years, searching every day and night for that special someone that was destined to stay by his side, but that didn’t change the fact that he was preparing for this moment specifically.

All day, Azul kept one eye on his target, watching them as he, Floyd, and Jade began to slowly rile him up with their constant assistance toward Kalim - helping the Scarabia housewarden with memorization spells, training routines, and homework that had been assigned over the holiday weekend, keeping him busy and away from the one person who was to be held responsible for the mess the dorm was now in. By mid-afternoon, the trap was set and Azul walked down the hall towards the kitchens with the suspect beside him.

“The students' completion rate for these assignments is up fifteen percent from yesterday,” Azul commented amicably, “Those are some statistically significant results, in my opinion. Believe it or not, (Y/N) and Grim both told me that Kalim was going through some rough patches, his mood swings pretty drastic - even compared to Floyd’s… but he’s been acting pretty calm since we arrived. Isn’t it wonderful that Kalim’s regained the faith of Scarabia’s students, Jamil?”

“...No. No, it isn’t,” Jamil hissed quietly.

“It’s not?” Azul feigned surprise.

“No offense, but I can’t let you people stay in Scarabia any longer,” Jamil stopped and glared at Azul hard, “It’s time you went back under the sea.”

‘Got you,’ Azul thought before asking, “Where did this come from, Jamil? Have I done something to offend you?”

“...You made eye contact with me. Fool,” Jamil’s wicked grin spread across his features, “The one you behold is your master. When I ask you a question, you will answer. When I give you a command, you will assent. Snake Whisper.”

Azul felt the magic coiling around him, a small murmur of ‘Bind the Heart’ rejected the magic - now… it was time to play.

Azul feigned pain until he could see you and Jade hiding out of the corner of his eye, making sure that the two of you could see everything - his cell phone held securely in Jade’s grip as the stream began. He feigned falling into Jamil’s magic, opening his eyes to reveal Jamil’s control over his mind and body. He slightly slumped his shoulders, giving the illusion that he was no longer in control.

As he did so, Jamil began to rant - playing right into the octomer’s hands

“Because of you, all my carefully laid plans have gone up in smoke! All I needed was a little more nudging from those two dimwits and the students would’ve kicked Kalim out,” Jamil growled, “Do you have any idea how much painstaking effort I put into laying the groundwork for that?”

Azul did not respond, though he wanted to give a few choice words to Jamil about calling his sweet angelfish a ‘dimwit’ - but he would have to wait for that.

“Azul - you returned all your contractually stolen powers back to their rightful owners recently, right?” Jamil asked suddenly.

“Yes, master,” Azul responded, thinking, ‘Where are you going with… ah, I see…’

“Tch. So much for using you as my own personal genie of the lamp,” Jamil scoffed, reaching up and rubbing his chin, “Your unique magic is quite a valuable asset… but it would be hard to keep you controlled long-term.”

“Master,” Azul’s voice spoke up, “I remember the contents of the contracts.”

“What?” Jamil looked at Azul in surprise.

“I remember all the secrets of the people I made contracts with - their troubles, their weakness, their desires.”

“What a… twisted collection. I see I made the right choice not to make friends with you,” Jamil smiled cruelly, “Tell me, does this intellectual cache of yours include the headmage’s secrets?”

Azul grinned internally, baiting Jamil even more, “Of course, master. I know one thing he would never want others to learn. Do you wish to know his secret?”

“Oh, abso-lutely!” Jamil’s smile broadened, “Once I have the headmage’s weakness in my grasp, I’ll finally be free. I’ll kick Kalim out of school and become Scarabia’s housewarden myself!”

“... And there we have it.”

Azul watched, a knowing smirk appearing on his face as Jamil whipped around to face Jade, his face contorted in confusion.

“So you finally show your true colors!” Grim pressed his paws onto his hips as he glared up at Jamil from between you and Jade, “I bet you thought you were real slick, pullin’ the wool over our eyes!”

“H-how… how much..?”

“All of it,” you answered, “Start to finish.”

“And live streamed to the world from Azul’s smartphone,” Jade waved the phone at Jamil as footsteps entered the hallway with many Scarabia students appearing, “Azul’s Magicam livestream presently had five thousand active viewers. It’s currently trending under the topic: ‘A Certain Magicians’ School’s Dirty Little Secret’.”

Voices began echoing around Jamil, the students of the Scarabia dorm demanding to know the truth and why Jamil - their own vice warden - would deceive them.

“Y-you… you’ve got it all wrong!” Jamil shouted, his fear and apprehensiveness growing.

“Don’t even try to talk your way out of this one,” Jade folded his arms across his chest, “The mind control magic you used on Azul is hard evidence.”

Everyone looked at Azul - who kept his silent slumped state, continuing to pretend to be under Jamil’s magic still.

“Jamil, it’s been you all along,” Jade continued, pulling everyone’s attention back to him, “You’ve been using your signature spell on Kalim and making him throw Scarabia into chaos!”

Jamil tsked, smearing, “I was trying to avoid escalating matters, but you leave me no choice - Azul, I command you! Subdue and restrain them all!”

“Yes, master,” Azul answered, taking a step forward.

You took a step back with Jade, Grim darting behind you as you looked at Azul pleading, momentarily forgetting that Azul wasn’t really under Jamil’s power, “Azul, no. You don’t want to do this. Please! Snap out of it!”

“Pleading with him won’t help you, (Y/N)!” Jamil laughed, “He’s my loyal minion now.”

‘And… now,’ Azul took another step forward, before spinning around and pointing his cane at Jamil, “You wish I was.”

“What?!”

Azul looked over his shoulder and winked at you, relieved to see your smile as he turned his attention back toward Jamil, “You told me the funniest thing earlier - allow me to return the favor. You think I’m an arrogant mage, but you were sorely mistaken. An embarrassing misjudgment for the vice warden of Scarabia - the dorm that is supposed to embody the spirit of mindfulness.”

“I know I made eye contact with you! I had you in my control!”

“Please, I’m a competent mage and you know it,” Azul frowned, keeping his cane pointed at Jamil, “I always prepare for the eventualities before I act - right Floyd?”

“I think you let your guard down a little too soon there, sea snake,” Floyd appeared, his voice sounding more baritone than before - almost like a tuba was speaking.

Azul snickered softly as your eyebrows raised up into your hairline, “That’s… what you exchanged with Floyd for his signature spell?”

“Pretty cool, huh?” Floyd said with a grin.

“Shall I explain it?” Azul asked, keeping his focus on Jamil, “In exchange for a vocal adjustment, Floyd gave me his unique magic, ‘Bind the Heart’ - it jams or blocks an opponent’s magic and diverts it elsewhere. Hence - I used it to evade your mind spell, then pretended to be in your hold and got you to spill your intentions while you gloated.”

Jamil gritted his teeth, glaring at them as Kalim appeared, the housewarden asking politely to tell him that it was true, that Jamil would never do anything like that, that it was just blackout spells because of how tired he was. But the silence from the vice warden was short-lived.

Azul felt you stiffen beside him, your hand suddenly gripping Azul’s overcoat, “(Y/N)? What’s wrong?”

You met his gaze and Azul knew.

An overblot was approaching.

He turned to Jade and Floyd, “Jade, Floyd, ready yourselves.”

“The one you behold is your master… When I ask you a question, you will answer. When I give you a command, you will assent! Snake Whisper!”

At Jamil’s command, the Scarabia dorm turned on its guests and its headwarden.

Azul was quick to pull you and Grim behind him as a shield of water protected the three of you from a rain of fire, “Mediocre, nothing! He’s easily one of the top mages in the entire school - to say nothing of Scarabia.”

Floyd grumbled, “I keep squeezin’ em but they keep gettin’ back up - are they zombies or somethin’?”

“That’s just part of ‘Snake Whisper’,” you explain, as if your eyes are seeing the internal workings of the spell, “It forces a target to continue to obey the commands - like a puppet on a string. Even though they might feel pain and are internally trying to avoid as well as fight the spell, their minds and bodies are not completely their own anymore.”

“Jamil! Please stop!” Kalim begged as he blocked an attack, “You can have what you want! You can be the housewarden! I’ll go home to my family!”

“What? You thought that would work? My spell won’t be broken so easily,” Jamil snickered as black ink and heavy energy surrounded him, “Not as long as you exist in this world… Kalim.”

“Jamil! You’re courting danger!” Jade begged, eyes widening, “If you keep using your signature spell, you’ll exceed you blot tolerance-”

“SHUT UP AND DON’T ORDER ME AROUND!”

The air became heavy as a dark shadow came over Scarabia. Azul pulled you closer as several dark shapes began to shift - the housewarden of Octavinelle watching in horror as a creature appeared before them. Hovering above the ground in ancient Viziar garb of black and red was Jamil, cloaked in darkness with hair that now took on the shapes of small black vipers - a dark shadow that took on the form of a dark genie hovering behind him, as if awaiting his command.

“He’s overblotted!” Azul gritted his teeth, “The negative energy is swelling up… Everyone! Steel yourselves!”

“I have no need for an incompetent king or a con artist,” the twisted voice of Jamil spoke, “Your personality flaws give me ADEQUATE cause… to send you packing on a one-way trip to the ends of the earth! So long! Ex-Housewarden Kalim! A-hahahahaha!”

The next thing Azul knew, he was airborne.

[7grandmel]

SiIvaGunner Blog MOJO!

The Ripper's Guide To That SiIvaGunner Tumblr Blog!

Hello there! You, yes you, reading this! Are you a high quality ripper contributing to the SiIvaGunner YouTube channel? Perhaps you've stumbled onto this blog before, through a link sent on Discord or through hearsay someplace else? Or, hell, this might be your first time on here, in which case: Welcome!

This is the uncreatively-titled That SiIvaGunner Tumblr Blog, where I've written over 350 posts analyzing, retelling the history behind and ultimately celebrating a selection of high quality rips found on SiIvaGunner. My rationale in posting has been to cast as wide of a net as possible in the kinds of rips I feature, and chances are, dear ripper, that a rip YOU've contributed to has already been covered on here, or is well on the way to be! But, that begs the question: How do you find the posts you're looking for?

With this post, I want to give some pointers of navigation for the people following this blog who aren't Tumblr users, or simply people who haven't kept tabs on this blog all too actively. This includes a quick overview of how my tagging system works, how it can help you find what you're looking for, and how to move around the Tumblr platform's infrastructure in general. So, let's begin!

1. What's up with the tags?

At the bottom of just about every Tumblr post, you'll find these grey footnotes called "tags". They serve a lot of functions: Like hashtags on Twitter, you can use them to help other people find what you've posted by "categorizing it". Compared to Twitter's hashtags, however, Tumblr's tags are far more normalized due to the lack of a character limit and their specifically allocated space at the bottom of posts. The image above is of the tags for this week's post on The Legend of Cage: Staff Roll.

The tags not highlighted in the red square are ones placed there to make the post discoverable to average Tumblr user. With the tag "tloz" ("The Legend of Zelda) in place, for instance, it means that the post will show up alongside other Zelda posts for users following the tag. But there's more uses to tags than just for discoverability, which is where the red-square tags become relevant: These are the tags placed for the sake of categorization!

You can probably imagine that a lot of Tumblr users will be keeping track of fandom tags like "Zelda" or "Majora's Mask" - but who is looking for "Season 6" or "rip visuals"? These are tags applied specifically to help one find posts within this blog. Every one of my written-analysis posts is tagged with the following template:

#todays siivagunner (Every written analysis post)

#season [x] (Filtering by Season)

#siivagunner and #siiva (Discoverability)

#[name(s) of ripper(s)] (Filtering by ripper in order of credits on Wiki)

#rip visuals (Added if a rip has visuals, eg. animation)

#[more rippers] (If the rip has visuals, these are the rippers who worked on those)

#tentative rip name (The rip lacks an album release)

Now you know why all these tags are here and what they all mean - but with the red-square rips in particular, there's ways you can use them to make reading the blog easier!

2. Okay, so how do I use these tags?

Here's a step-by-step guide with visuals to show how to go from a post to other posts like it. First, make sure you're viewing the post on the blog itself and not through a reblog - the easiest way to do this is to click "View original post", or just click the header of the original post itself (around where it says "April 16, 2024). Then, scroll down to the tags we just discussed, and click the one you want to filter by - say, for instance, you just want to see Season 2 rips I've talked about? You'll get taken to a view of the blog that only shows you posts I've tagged as being about Season 2 rips! How cool is that!

Finally, however, is the coolest use of tag categorizing and searching on Tumblr - The Archive.

3. What is the archive, how do I use it?

The archive is the page featured on the main image of this post! A blog's archive is a file explorer-esque view of every post ever made and reblogged onto a Tumblr blog, which also lets you filter posts by a tag (not multiple) used in them. If you know how Tumblr's links are formatted, it's very easy to find - this blog's archive, for instance, can be found at https://7grandmel.tumblr.com/archive, my personal account's archive can be found at https://melblur.tumblr.com/archive - you see the pattern yourself. The archive is very annoying to navigate on mobile and I would recommend doing all of this step on desktop.

Like I covered in the previous points, all of the blog's posts are tagged according to the Season they were released in, the people contributing, whether the rip features visuals, and more. Given the immense scope of SiIvaGunner's contributors, there's no concise list with links I could give you of all the ones that have been featured on here - thus, its up to you to edit the archive's URL link to make it show what you want to see. In the above image, for instance, we've added "/tagged" followed by "/dante" - which, then, displays all of the posts I've made that were tagged as being made by ripper dante. Click on one of the posts displayed, and you'll be sent to exactly that post!

There are some additional caveats to keep in mind here. Rippers like dante, toonlink and more go under multiple names online, and in those cases I've tried to always tag all of their aliases: all posts tagged with "dante" are of course also tagged with "soundcirclet". (This rule of thumb is excluding deadnames, of course). Additionally, April Fools 2024 saw me do a very stupid event wherein I covered every single Raft Ride rip uploaded on the channel - to keep the archive clean, I decided to forego my typical tagging system for these posts and give them their own dedicated sorting. You can find all of these posts under the tag #raftmageddon, and you can filter by rippers by writing a ripper's name in the URL with the prefix "raft :" For instance, a Raft Ride rip made by SonicHeroesFan1 would be tagged as #raft : SonicHeroesFan1.

Note also that Tumblr's URLs are magic and support spaces - if a ripper's name has a space in it, like Retro Gaming, the space also goes in the URL.

4. Now I know how to find things! But how do I submit rip suggestions for you to cover?

The easiest method if you're an active Tumblr user, is to use the Ask Box, which is accessed under a big blue "REQUEST A RIP!" button on the blog's main page. If you're not a Tumblr user, don't fret! In the regularly-updated pinned post, you can find links to a lot of the tags and such I've talked about just beforehand, but also to the Google Forms Request Form. There's no formalities needed to request a rip: Just your name (if you wish to be credited with one), the name of the rip or YouTube upload, and (ideally!) a quick description of why you think the rip warrants being written about.

Finally, if you're ever talking to me on Discord in DMs or the SiIvaGunner server itself, feel free to just request things off the cuff! I jot down all the requests sent my way in the same spreadsheet as all other requests. Note that requesting a rip does not guarantee that I will cover it, nor will I send any sort of message accepting or declining your request.

5. Conclusion

Last week, I announced a bit of a shift in the blog's structure, as I have a lot more stuff to juggle than I did back when this all started to where I've had to slow down the rate of postings. (You can read more in the Update post I made last week). Really, this is the first post I've made to branch out of my typical postings of rip analysis, reblogs and blog updates, barring some one-off anecdotes made once or twice. Hopefully you've found it a worthwhile (and helpful!) read - and if you know of any rippers that would be curious to see written analysis and coverage of their work on here, send them this post to get them started with the basic ropes of navigating this weird website.

Tumblr is vast and intimidating, and definitely not a site for everyone. But hopefully with this, even more of you readers will be able to find the posts that you're looking for!

See you on Monday!

[bulbagarden]

guess what??? bulbapedia had its 50,000th wiki article created a bit ago, and to celebrate we made a news article celebrating bulbapedia! i'm actually in it, soo... take a look if you'd like!! (this was written by our twitter admin and my overlord wyndoncalling)

Celebrating 50k Bulbapedia articles with our favourite wiki pages!

As one of the world's largest media franchises, Pokémon is monolithic to say the least. Documenting every facet of this gargantuan IP is a task perhaps only the most dedicated and/or foolhardy would embark on, yet that's exactly what our Bulbapedia team and thousands of selfless contributors have done over eighteen long years! With Pokémon now encompassing nine generations of main series games along with dozens of spin-offs, mobile games, movies, anime and manga series, merchandise and much more, the wiki itself has grown in tandem - we recently hit a whopping 50,000 articles!

To celebrate, we've compiled a list from across the Bulbagarden team of our favourite wiki articles. For our non-wiki team members, these might simply be pages that they enjoy reading and help inform their work in other aspects of the site. For wiki Staff, these could instead be pages that they've sunk many productive hours into. Read on for an eclectic collection of articles detailing some of the most obscure corners of the Pokémon franchise!

Credits to Staff artist Sirius for the awesome header image!

WyndonCalling (Social Media) - Tall grass

On the one hand, I think it's faintly hilarious that anyone would go into such detail for a mundane and omnipresent mechanic of the main series games; the tall grass that awaits the player on every starting route just feels so self-explanatory in function. On the other hand, I think it speaks volumes about the commitment and mentality of the Bulbapedia team and contributors that no scrap of information is left undocumented - on the tall grass page you'll find the basic details about how it works, but also variations such as tall grass and seaweed, animations of the Cut mechanic, in-battle effects, and more. Who knew that simple grass could be so fascinating in a world with flame-throwing dragons and electric mice?

Runner-up - List of Pokémon by base stats

As the Admin of the Bulbagarden Twitter account, I'm always on the hunt for interesting trivia to share; having the base stats of all Pokémon in one, sortable place makes it so much easier to make fun comparisons between species (did you know that Krabby has more Attack than Eternatus?).

Maverick Nate - Bulbapedia - Coin (TCG) (and its three subpages: Gens 1-4, Gens 5-6, and Gens 7-8)

This page is what I consider my best accomplishment during my 10 years as Bulbapedia's TCG Leader. There is an incredible amount of research, time, (and personal financial investment) baked into the article, and it always gives me a swell of pride when I update it with fresh images of newly acquired coins. There are over 700 different coins documented here, and I still fondly remember the long-night research sessions I would have with my best friend when we would do things like watch countless YouTube openings to figure out release information, check out endless eBay and Yahoo Auctions listings for never-before-seen coins, hold up physical coins to a spotlight trying to determine the Holofoil pattern. Our other friends would poke fun at us for researching in the field, (which was just our excuse to go shopping for newly released TCG products with new coins or hitting up garage sales and card shops on the off chance they had old ones). All of those years of effort produced what is now considered the definitive list of all coins in existence for coin enthusiasts. Whenever I see people online referencing it and using it for their own collections, I just have to smile, knowing that my favorite article is helping people all around the globe.

Wowy (Bulbapedia) - Red (Masters)

This page is just an example for all the character pages for Pokémon Masters. As one of the main editors covering Pokémon Masters when the game was first released, I feel very content to see many other editors who have taken the mantle to make Bulbapedia's coverage of the game quite comprehensive! I also enjoy the gallery section at the bottom because there are some sweet artwork pieces that come out of the game / the PMEX Twitter.

Runner Up - Face board

An article that was initially written for fun ended up being moved from the userpage to the main Bulbapedia page. Like the tall grass page, it's a niche page that showcases how much we like to document every minor and obscure detail in the franchise (albeit there is still so much to cover)!

Lisia (Social Media) (omg HIIII that's me!!!!) (姉ちゃん見て見て、あたしテレビだ。。) - Pokémon world in relation to the real world

This is a very extensive page, and it's very useful for a lot of different things! I use it for worldbuilding for fanfiction and roleplay stuff usually, but it's fun to look at just in general as well! I remember looking at the page first like... years ago, and it blew my mind to see that the Pokémon world was actually based off of real locations! It's something that I'd call a huge resource for anyone who creates Pokémon fanworks, especially written ones!

Runner Up - Lisia (i had to LOL)

Maybe it's a little... self-serving? But I really like this article of my personal namesake; she's my favorite character after all! She's a relatively minor character within the whole of Pokémon so there's not a whole lot of information about her, so I like reading all the stuff there is about her! It makes me happy that people have put work into articles about everyone, because well... in a way I wouldn't be me without it. I should probably contribute to it sometime!

Orchid (Forums) - Pokémon food

I picked this article because it is astoundingly comprehensive on its topic, and offers a lot of really interesting insight into the Pokémon universe as a whole. From Poffins, to prey, to parasites, to Slowpoke Tails... it's all here! It's amazing how having all this information in one place puts into perspective just how much there is to cover on what, at a glance, might seem like such a simple subject. I find myself coming back here every now and then just out of curiosity (or perhaps to settle a debate about what an Aerodactyl really eats).

Runner-up - Twerp

This page is silly and I love it. I've even shown this one to friends and family who are fellow Pokémon fans, and they've gotten just as much of a kick out of it as I have! But as amusing of a read as it may be, what I love most about this page is the fact that even a short and lighthearted bit of terminology like this is documented thoroughly here, just like anything else would be. All across Bulbapedia, you can find so much care and detail put into the littlest of things, and that does bring a smile to my face

DapperCody (Multimedia) - Ash Ketchum

Like many people, I grew up watching the Pokémon anime as a youngster. I enjoy Ash's article because it is comprehensive account of the quarter century that he has graced our screens - looking it over is very nostalgic. The history section with photos is fantastic, and I love being able to see all the Pokémon he has ever owned or used and their current status. It also has an extensive trivia section like all my favorite articles do. I've fallen down the anime rabbit hole on Bulbapedia numerous times, and Ash's page is a great place to start.

Runner Up - Ash's Noctowl

See all of the above, but from a different perspective. Pages for individual Pokémon from the anime are fantastic to get a glimpse into all the highlights from their time in the spotlight, and what better example of this than my personal favorite, Noctowl? The move history is really neat, especially the fact that it designates the moves recently used (and the illegal ones when applicable). Did you know Noctowl was the first Shiny Pokémon in the anime?

bthrussellUK (Bulbapedia) - Pokémon Battle Chess

I really love this article because I think it’s an example of what Bulbapedia is great at; taking obscure Pokémon topics (especially outside of Japan) and saving them from being lost to the sands of time. The original Pokémon Battle Chess website has been taken offline, so without articles like this one, the game would be forgotten. Instead, because it’s here, I decided to find and buy a copy of both Pokémon Battle Chess BW Version and Pokémon Battle Chess and use them to help expand the gameplay section of the article. They're actually pretty fun games! Now I just need a copy of Pokémon Battle Chess W…

Runner Up - Pokémon games

It looks like it's just a really long list... and it is! But for me it's a really great reminder of how massive Pokémon is, how many games have been released in the last 26 years, and how many different platforms Pokémon games have released on. Ever heard of the Advanced Pico Beena or the iQue Player?

Whether they're popular or niche, wide-ranging or obscure, we hope you've enjoyed our short tour of our favourite Bulbapedia articles! Do you have your own? Are you tickled by the trivia on a given page? You can let us know on our forums or Discord server - or even start editing yourself!

The wiki can never have too many contributors, and if your love of Pokémon is as deep as ours we'd be delighted to have you with us for the next 50,000 articles!

(lisia note: thank you for reading!!!!!!!!!! hopefully you enjoyed it!)

[apteryxparvus]

L ♡ V E R ⇌ L ⦻ S E R — chapter 5

Chapter five — Grande Belladonna iced tea with 4 pumps of “Please forget this ever happened”, please

Pairing — Scaramouche / Female Reader

Content warning — swearing • mentions of bullying • brief mention of psychedelic substances

Summary: In a twist of unfortunate events, you find out that being exposed as the target of Kunikuzushi middle school bullying escapades was just the beginning of your troubles. To your dismay, you’re thrown even deeper into the glamorous but artificial world of celebrities. Oh, and the cherry on top? You’re forced to pretend to be in a long-term romantic relationship with none other than said ex-bully. All because of a careless misclick by his social media manager.

prev • masterlist • next

It’s early noon when you slowly open your eyes, the world seeming hazy. Your dry mouth and heavy eyelids serve as reminders of the previous night. Glancing around your room, you note the evidence scattered in the corner — the empty bottle of raki and cups, snack packets, and plates.

With a groan, you rise from the bed and stretch your weary limbs, suppressing a yawn. The tempting aroma of freshly roasted coffee wafts through the air, accompanied by the scent of a mouthwatering breakfast. Following your senses, you make your way to the kitchen, the soft padding of your sock-clad feet barely making a sound along the hallway.

“Morning,” Alhaitam greets you with a brief glance as he expertly flips a msemen in the air, the flatbread landing back in the pan with a sizzle. He’s wearing a novelty apron — a gag gift from Kaveh — adorned with the words “I Beat My Meat” and a playful illustration of a tiny, round creature tenderizing a steak.

Your attention turns to Kaveh, slumped over the kitchen table, his face buried in his hands as he groans softly in discomfort. A steaming cup of coffee sits beside him.

“How—how much did we drink last night?” you inquire. 

“A whole bottle of raki before I had managed to finish the dinner preparations.” Alhaitam’s deadpan response leaves you wide-eyed. It all explains the raging hangover.

He suggests you take a seat and grab a coffee, while he finishes the crispy pancakes. You settle next to Kaveh, cradling your own mug of liquid relief, and observe as Alhaitam skillfully finishes his task.

He arranges the flatbread, arranging the pieces in three portions, and places them on the table. You gently nudge Kaveh awake, and he stirs from his light slumber. Alhaitam adds the final touch to the table — a jar of homemade honey and some soft butter, along with small bowls of nuts and raisins.

“You should probably check your Twitter,” Alhaitam suggests, casually dipping his msemen in the soft honey. Confusion clouds your mind for a moment, but within moments, the hazy recollections from the previous night rush back. Vaguely, you can recall venting to Kaveh about the whole Scaramouche bullying scandal, and unleashing your pent up frustration as a long twitter rant. 

Panic sets in and a sharp ache throbs in your head.

With trembling hands, you unlock your phone and navigate to your Twitter app. Dread courses through your veins, you don’t feel ready to face the consequences of your drunken actions. The thought of the post and of the numerous quote retweets and comments fills you with embarrassment. You delete the post, desperate to erase your public outburst. Taking a deep breath, you navigate to your account settings and switch your profile to private.

Your heart pounds, as you muster the courage to open your message inbox. You silently pray that the vague memory of you insulting Scaramouche is just a mere figment of your imagination.

“Fuck.”

Author’s note: updates might get a bit more sporadic, sorry about that 😅 also, i decided to add the header image to all chapters, so now i gotta go back and fix the previous ones... sigh

psa, dont go ingesting weird plants u see just cuz they're pretty, okei?

Taglist — @scaramoo @bananasquash @yukiipc @theblueblub @feiherp @scarletttcroww @farelady-fate @skyoverkill1 @reversearrowhead @magica-ren @sakurapeach

[lonelyeyesweek]

[ID: A digital picture of a smartphone lying on a grey background with a playlist open. Now playing song reads: "FAQ 2024" underneath that it's specified to be: "Song Lonelyeyes". Volume on top of the screen is set to a medium. The picture representing the song on the left side of screen is eye with cloud, dáme as icon if this blog. The length of the imaginary song is 3:25. End of ID]

FAQ

What is lonelyeyes week?

A week long event focused on the relationship of Peter Lukas and Jonah Magnus (no matter what body he currently inhabits). For every day of the week there will be two prompts to get your inspiration flowing.

When does the event take place?

It takes place from Monday 23rd of September to Sunday 29th of September.

Where can I find the prompts for the event?

We will release the list with prompts approximately a month before the event.

Do I have to follow the prompts?

Not at all. The prompts are here to give you inspiration but if the event motivates you to create any other content related to the ship we will be happy to share it.

What kind of content should I create?

You can create anything from fanfics and fanarts to cosplays, podfics and playlists or anything else that comes to your mind.

How exactly will my work get shared?

On tumblr you can either tag us directly as @/lonelyeyesweek or use tag #lonelyeyesweek2024

On twitter you can either tag us directly as @/LonelyeyesWeek or use tag #lonelyeyesweek2024

On AO3 you can add your work into the collection LonelyeyesWeek2024.

I want to create something nsfw/with darker themes/containing potential triggers. Can I?

We have no problem with nsfw works or works containing triggers and darker themes. We only ask you to make sure to tag your creation properly so we can tag it as well.

I am a minor. Can I still participate?

Of course. Though we recommend you to filter the tag #nsft on tumblr and #donotarchive on twitter as we might be reblogging nsfw works.

I don’t ship Peter with Jonah. Can I do something for Peter/og Elias instead?

Unfortunately this doesn’t really fit the theme of our event as it is focuses on the relationship between Peter Lukas and Jonah Magnus.

I have problem with deadlines. Can I submit my work late?

Sure! We’ll be keeping an eye on the tag so if it takes you a month to finish the first prompt we will still be happy to see it and reblog it.

Who made all the amazing art for the event?

All of the amazing work on our icon, header and the promotion art is done by @p1nkwitch

I have some other question about the event.

Feel free to send us ask and we will do our best to answer!

[peipakao]

combo icon and header art i made for my twitter. might make something similar for tumblr soon

[spooky-month-of-may]

Gretel and the Big Bad Wolf. 🔪🍬

This is my header atm! Might make it my header on twitter too for Spooky Month! 💜

[honeyhotteoks]

in the spirit of the writers' game (except its not actually a question so no presh) do you have any tips on getting integrated into fandom community? i have like 12 bajillion fic ideas bumping around in my head that i wanna gab to someone about but i dont know how i'd like.. get someone's attention without it being.. weird? or like manufactured... i'm reticent to post because so much attention spooks me Out of writing which is like, not the end goal lol

tldr how do i make friends please and thanks but in the least pathetic way possible

this is a great question!! i'll be honest with you, i'm not sure if i'm the best person to answer this, but i'll do my best.

for some context, i'm actually very introverted. i really struggle to make friends both online and in real life. while most of my meaningful friendships are fandom based, typically it's because a pretty extroverted person snapped me up and then i got comfy talking, not really from me doing the outreach first.

when it comes to writing and a writing community, i'm also pretty insulated. i would love to be friends with some of my favorite writers on here too, but honestly i just can never bring myself to reach out, and my adhd is really intense so i tend to miss messages/notifications/engagement when other people reach out to me.

all of that being said, if you're interested in creating a writing space for yourself in this fandom, i do have some advice, and maybe you'll be better at grabbing onto the potential friendships that do come from that, which is the part i struggle with.

to start, i'd recommend becoming an active participant in the reading community if you aren't already. i'd create a fandom blog for yourself here and/or on twitter and use that to just start engaging with fic you like - reblog stuff and add fun tags, compliment the authors you're loving, drop messages off anon from that account if that's something you're comfortable doing. just start getting your username and your pfp on people's pages more and more. (this is one of those reasons i'll never change my username or my pfp btw, people know this as me and they've known that for a long time so in a small way it's kind of my writer's brand)

then think about what you're writing or want to write. is it big multichaptered work? smutty oneshots? romantic imagines? list-style stuff / scenario stuff like "hyung line headcanons" etc? figure out what you feel compelled to write, not just ideas, and start to write them. write them for yourself even if they're "bad" or unpolished and just enjoy that process a little bit while you're engaging as a reader / casually making fandom connections.

once you feel like you might have ideas to share, i think it's completely fine to make a post asking if anyone would want to beta read or if anyone else would want to talk about fics/headcanons etc. if you really want someone to connect with before you ever post your fic, i think this is the best way. i personally don't love messages asking me if i would be willing to read or edit someone's fic because to be honest that's a huge undertaking and i always find i'm too critical / take it too seriously. i also think when it's done this way it kind of makes the relationship a little awkward overall.... some people might be okay with it and i might be overthinking it, but that's just how i feel in general. BUT if you find people by asking the community and people are reaching out to you, that's completely different imo and i've done that in the past in other fandoms.

then once you're ready to throw a hail mary and post something, whether it's beta read or not, i'd recommend taking some time to do the following:

consider the look of your post and the aesthetic. people are so much more likely to click on it if it's formatted well and has some kind of a header image. go look at what other people do, what you like, and what you want your fic 'look' to be.

edit, and edit again. i know it's exciting to want to post asap, but if you're nervous, read it again. in my opinion, fic that you post should be fic that you want to read. if you're struggling to read your own work because something is a little clunky or you find yourself skimming it...... someone else might feel the same

post it at the right time. you don't need to be a marketing major and try to like drive engagement, but if you post it at 3am on a sunday i promise you people will miss it, and then you'll be struggling with the feeling of why did no one like my fic that i spent hours on etc.

your first fics aren't going to get much attention. that is totally okay! keep going, keep trying, and over time you will find your audience.

reblog reblogs.... if you get a reblog of someone adding tons of tags / fun comments / a review of your work etc., reblog their reblog and thank them! answer questions! engage! opening that door in this way as a writer will help build a little community of your own.

i would say that over the last three years here i've gained a little community of my own. i have consistent readers, anons and mutuals i recognize, people that i look forward to engaging with every time i post something even if they don't realize it. that means SO much to me as a writer, but truly it took a long time to create that space for myself here. admittedly though, even with that being true, i really struggle with connection but that might not be apparent to people just following my blog. i guess this is all to say, comparison is the thief of joy. as you start to create your own space here, reader or writer, don't spend time looking at other people and other blogs and wishing you could have xyz too. focus on what you truly want, what makes you happy, and do it for the love of writing. the rest will surely follow in time. 💛

[canarysage]

hi... don't know if you're the person to ask but do you have any tips for like. edit composition. (????) thar makes no sense . i apologize

i’m probably not the right person but fear not i’ll say some bullshit anyway. obligatory preface but i have never taken a graphic design class in my life so take everything i say with a grain of salt, or several, because idk what the fuck i’m doing

a good thing to keep in mind when editing is your focal point—that is to say, whatever it is you wanted people to be focused on. in most cases it’s probably going to be a character, but you might also have text or something else as your focal point. after you’ve picked your focal point, find ways to emphasize it—people usually do this with stroke (outlines) or with things behind the character like splatters, laces, etc. it should be relatively easy to spot a focal point in most people’s edits, even if they didn’t knowingly pick one. if your edits look janky, you probably ended up with too many things your brain is trying to focus on at once—try simplifying it or making one part pop out more than the other! this also comes into play with text. using my pinned as an example:

(still frames so they’re easier to see) you can see that len and rin are the focal points of this image because they’re outlined and because they’re in front of the text. the text is in the back because i deemed it less important than the characters—i mean, you can read my url without the image anyway.

also, sizing is a pretty big thing in composition. your brain looks at the biggest part of an image first—this is the concept behind newspaper headlines! your brain looks at the big text first, then at the smaller. you can see this reflected in my current header (displayed below, in case i change it at a later date) where “canarysage” is bigger than “resources for editors” because I wanted you to see “canarysage” first

how you align your elements is important to. generally speaking, you’ll want to keep everything pretty centered, but, as with anything, you can break this rule for the sake of creativity. when you’re making things like this directory graphic:

it’s cool to do a zig-zag sort of pattern. when making something like this, it’s probably better to do from left to right—that’s the way english-speakers (and speakers of several other languages) read things so that’s how your brain automatically goes. you should also position whatever you want to be read first near the top—in this case, the part that says “one” is in the top left, because that’s where most people’s eyes will go automatically. you can also see the central art is the focal point because of the outlines and the shapes behind it. the buttons are kept separate because they’re a solid color instead of the pattern used on the background shape—and the text stands out because it’s outlined in black, unlike the rest, and it has a pattern. if you use patterned text, outline it so it’s clearly seen and read.

you can also avoid centering things to make your edit more ‘dynamic’ (idk if that’s the right word) like i did with this header:

both eirika and the text are off center, which makes it look more interesting. also, they’re aligned differently—eirika is aligned to the right while the text is aligned to the left. this helps it seem less empty and is more fun visually

if you’re doing an edit with an even number of characters (like a ship edit) you’ll want to keep any one character out of the center, as this makes them the focal point and can kind of shunt the other off to the side. unless you’re doing matching graphics, in which case you should keep one centered, so it’s clear which is the “main” one in each piece of the set.

sizing is also important in terms of literally how small or big your edit is. headers tend to be pretty large (tumblr uses a 16:9 ratio, and twitter uses a 3:1) but things like icons or stamps are pretty small. especially with stamps, you’ll want to make your character pretty large in the stamp so they’re more easily seen. tumblr icons show up on your dashboard as 128x128, which is pretty small, so you’ll want to make sure your icon is easily discernible from that size.

also, i dont think this is necessarily a hard and fast rule, but when you’re making icons and you have to crop out a portion of the character’s head—crop out the top of the head, not the chin. i can’t tell you WHY i think this is a rule or even if anyone agrees with me, but it’s something to keep in mind. here’s an example of the two different kinds of cropping:

cropping the chin out just looks goofy, idk

since rentry graphics are just sort of dependent on the user, there’s no real hard and fast rules to composing them. just keep in mind whatever your focal point is and try to keep people’s attention on it, whether by adding random shit or outlining or whatever.

same thing with replycons, really. i like to keep my replycons semi-simple, but if you’re doing a collage-type of replycon, it’s better to keep the collage in the background for the most part, except for one or two focal pieces:

you can see that most of the collage pieces are behind rin except for the flower stickers, which are off to the corner so they don’t detract from her. the stripey-line things help a lot, too, as they lead your eye to the main part of the reply icon even without being centered—the main part being the character, of course

with moodboards or stimboards, it’s best to keep your character in the exact center—unless you have two, in which case keep them both in the middle so they’re easier to see. there’s no hard and fast rules with moodboards, but i like to keep images with similar composition near but not directly beside each other

the top middle and bottom middle of this one are both pretty minimalistic, so i kept them adjacent from but not beside each other. as for the rest of it… well i just kind of did whatever

if you’re doing a moodboard or stimboard with two kinds of themes then it’s best to do a checkerboard type of pattern

you can see that here. the pattern is food-art-food-art-ena-art-food-art-food. like a checkerboard, except ena’s in the middle

i’m being so for real i don’t understand composition at all. it’s really best to just do whatever looks best to you personally and see what happens. i hope this is helpful-ish!

yours truly, canarysage

[triflesandparsnips]

(eta 10/10/23: Having just realized that this is now a very easy to google explainer, please also see the full end-of-game roundup here: "when something is definitely not a game, but most definitely a gift" or my related #definitely not a game tag. We now return you to your regularly scheduled nonsense, currently in progress.)

So... so.

So this just dropped.

And listen. LISTEN. For people who haven't been following this Our Flag Means Death-related alternate-reality-shenanigan fest, the following will make no sense to you-- or, wait, fuck it--

A Brief History of the Javid Denkins Alternate-Reality Game

(I didn't intend "overly long essays about in-depth fandom-related shenanigans" to be my brand, but by god I'm here now and I will make us all suffer through it.)

Reality (As We Know It)

Established and verified gay pirate showrunner David Jenkins is a regular shenanigineer on twitter: retweets fanart, retweets cosplays, calls fans sluts (endearment), has ongoing fight with medieval cats.

Back in 2022, David Jenkins implied heavily that he had joined tumblr, but did not cough up his account name.

This is the sum total of real and actual events and identities.

Through the Looking Glass

Fans started looking for David Jenkins's tumblr. What fans found is the tumblr of one Javid Denkins, who appeared to be new, had a variant of Jenkins's twitter icon, and seemed to be cheekily maintaining an incognito by steadfastly asserting that he is definitely not David Jenkins.

Fans got weird about it, because that is the nature of fandom. I said something about it here, because I have Feelings about the Rules of Incognito and also about Not Being Weird About People Who Make the Content We Like. I put it as a reblog to the post, as per regular tumblring, no response requested/required because babes, if I'm going to be perceived, I want it to be organic. (ahem... FOOTNOTE 1)

I kept a cursory eye on things, because it can be Really Lonely to be a famous person who just wants to have a regular online experience, and if that's what whoever was on the other end wanted, then that's what they should get to have imo. Unlike a regular tumblr that I might reply to directly or engage with on a same-level kinda way, I let them set the rules of engagement because unless/until they came clean, they would always be Schrodinger's Showrunner to me, and therefore subject to my internal Don't Be Creepy ruleset.

My second Javid reblog was pretty much what I would do to any other newbie tumblr person (as they professed to be): adding on to a gag by referencing the "color of the sky" meme and also a seagull, for OFMD-related reasons (which fit within the ruleset, because Javid was actively connecting himself with OFMD type things). And Javid reblogged it, so hey, I was winning at tumblr interactions, a thing that is normal to want and possible to achieve.

Time passed. Javid dropped (what will be revealed to be the first of many) photo manipulations. (FOOTNOTE 2)

On the same day, Javid posted what looked like an accidental smashkey. I reblogged with a seagull, because again, established rules of engagement and me winning at tumblr interactions. He reblogged himself, though, with what looked like another smashkey, but was actually a goddamn Caesar cipher-- and started using the tag #definitely not a game.

From there, Javid started up a stream of fairly fun puzzles. I didn't keep up with it fully, but since it looked like Javid wanted people to interact, I interacted (while trying to ensure that other people could keep having fun too). He also started subtly changing his icon, his tumblr header, etc., expanding the bounds of the puzzle space, as it were. (And if you want a complete rundown of the puzzle history and the associated answers, this twitter thread is enormous and thorough, thank you @eefaevie.)

The seagull made an appearance every once in a while; I threw together various season 2 bingo cards in response to these potential spoilers; I spent my time largely keeping back so I could eat popcorn and Not Be Creepy. But... but.

The thing was, Javid's method of posting (in a "heeeere fishy fishy fishy" manner) seemed, to me, to be the actions of someone trying to play with the audience and/or provide enrichment for the enclosure. So after some thought and, again, remembering the loneliness of being a Creative Person but trying to be mindful that this person was still incognito and could be the actual dude, I started using the seagull to reblog extra content, links, whathaveyou, with the tag #enrichment can go in BOTH enclosures-- with the idea that, if Javid wanted to look, he had the option to do so-- and if he did, he'd be rewarded with, again, no demands on him or his attention, but just: some content. Some enrichment. Some fun. A "picking up what you're putting down" kind of vibe from one person to another, both of whom are, at the very least, interested in communicating with an audience.

To be clear: For me, at the end of the day, it had to be a choice. I needed to provide room for Javid to choose to enter the magic circle of my additional game play-- but I also wasn't going to hold my breath about it. This was Javid's space, with intentions and purposes I had no way of knowing (nor should I)-- I was just, metaphorically, bringing another set of dice and maybe some graph paper with an extra room drawn on it that he could easily enter if he wanted, to play in a space intended to complement his. He was putting in a shitton of labor for what was essentially just a gift; I wanted to show appreciation for that labor, while putting in some of my own to gift back.

So when the first round of puzzles ended, and a new one began, I linked the answers to one of his anagram puzzles inside some seagull gifs-- but I figured, why not add something extra? I used his pigpen cipher to dare him to use a book code next. To even see the dare he'd have to want to decode the gifs-- and if he ultimately didn't want to engage, no skin off my nose. (That's why there's a border around the magic circle with clear entrances and exits.) Either way, I was having a nice time.

The next puzzle type was a stereogram. (Neat.) The puzzle after that, though? I get tagged and informed that Javid has, in fact, posted a motherfucking book code. (FOOTNOTE 3)

Enter the Thunder Parasocial Dome

This is the point where I first have to be pulled down from the curtains by rational people who have only my best interests at heart.

(Having a whole Thesis Statement about why I was engaging with Schrodinger's Showrunner is one thing. Having possible evidence that my engagement was, like, actually engaged with is quite another.)

By sweet and loving friends and family I was reminded that:

Other people are, in fact, allowed to be clever about things too.

That all sorts of pre-planning may have gone into all this, and that therefore the timing was a coincidence.

That there are a limited number of easily accessible ciphers out there, so the code type could also be a coincidence.

And that either way I still have my important Don't Be Creepy code of ethics.

So. I took a deep breath. Cool. I was totally and absolutely cool about this.

...And in a totally normal manner I proceeded to lay an elaborate trap.

AHAHAHA JUST JOKING what I mean is: I replied to the tagged post, acknowledging that the sphere of potential puzzling had now expanded beyond tumblr. I used Javid's own fake-link trick to link to a seagull laugh. And in the tags I threw in a lot of potential internet-related alternate reality stuff.

But also, crucially... some more ideas for Javid to use. (FOOTNOTE 4) If he wanted them. If he was actually looking.

Since I was now playing In Earnest, I spent some time putting together a youtube channel, an alternate tumblr, a neocities account -- a whole new field of play, if Javid wanted to engage there. I pulled out the dusty memories of a Yuletide fic I wrote several years ago that used similar shenanigans to tell an interactive fiction story about Monty Python. (Hilariously enough, my first RPF.) I continued to play with all these new and fascinating toys.

A Strange Ship on the Horizon

What with one thing and another three years pass, a Javid puzzle eventually lead to an AO3 account-- which to me definitively opened Schrodinger's box: maybe this was a member of the production playing with fire, more likely it was a clever fan whose brain is fucking fascinating, but it most definitely was not David Jenkins.

But. Javid was still in incognito. And I still don't know if I had been perceived.

I read the fic the Javid account is writing (which is still a work in progress and pretty great ngl)-- it's a fandom AU, where Ed and Stede are fans of a gay pirate romcom called Blow the Man Down, featuring Sam Bellamy and Olivier Levasseur. The showrunner is named Javid, who doesn't have social media but gets cornered into agreeing to join twitter (rather than our universe's tumblr). And Ed decides, on a lark, to start a fake twitter account, tag it #definitelynotjaviddenkins... and then freak out because a large contingent of fandom shows up on his metaphorical doorstep saying HELLO, JAVID.

As if this weren't enough: beyond the fic itself, suddenly a whole multimedia alternate universe suddenly appeared, with multiple twitter and AO3 accounts beyond just Stede and Ed, forming an entire fucking fandom, Goncharov-style, around Blow the Man Down. It was and continues to be fucking wild. It's also amazing. And the porn is surprisingly approachable. (BUT SEE AGAIN FOOTNOTE 1)

Grappling Hooks Breaching the Parasocial Divide

The thing is, though. The thing. That is.

I have officially reached Level 2 Curtain Clawing.

As I read the fic and the accompanying universe, I started to. Notice things.

References to soap (but... but surely that's normal. Many people talk about soap, not just amateur history enthusiasts like myself).

References to obscure scents (LABDANUM. Someone referenced labda-motherfucking-num. But surely. Surely it is not an entirely unheard of thing; I am not the first person to discover it or the fact that it gets combed from goats jesus christ the goat thing I forgot about that--)

References to the drilled coin from the wreck of Sam Bellamy's ship, which appeared as a random bit of possible future lore for Javid in this bit of enrichment (but I put in lots of possible lore! I had a whole thing going about figureheads! Bad luck to kill a seabird! I had a whole thing for a while where I thought maybe the digraph code Javid was hinting at was actually a Playfair cipher! I have been wrong many times before and added lots of random possible narratives. SO SURELY THE COIN IS A COINCIDENCE).

References to... okay not really references, and I've never articulated it quite like this (though this is definitely my vibe), but references to the idea of these puzzles and enrichment being a conversation in and of themselves, held at a remove and existing entirely in call (Javid) and response (the audience).

Finally... I started to notice that Stede decodes/interprets Ed-as-Javid's puzzles in a long twitter thread (like... like the one linked above) but also... sends back puzzles. Like, well, me.

"But STILL," I screech from the top of the curtain rail. "This could ALL BE COINCIDENCE," I yowl as friends and family try to bat me down with a broom. Even, by god, today's drop... which uses a password-protected url shortener. The exact same one I used in an earlier enrichment. But! It's not like there are a lot of those! Maybe this was just the first one that cropped up for Javid, just as it was the first that cropped up for me! (BUT THEN AGAIN, MAY I REFER YOU BACK TO FOOTNOTE 4)

The fic is at chapter 14. There are, if AO3 is to be believed, 7 more chapters to go, plus who knows how much additional extra-universe material. There is so. much. here.

...And so many more opportunities to climb all the curtains.

“It's a great huge game of chess that's being played—all over the world—if this is the world at all, you know.”

So at this point... what, in fact, is happening?

I'm inside a Schrodinger's box whose sides are entirely composed of parasocial uncertainty.

Maybe Javid is here. (HELLO, JAVID.)

Maybe he isn't! (HELLO, THE MIRROR IN MY ENCLOSURE.)

Maybe I'm not actually being referenced at all, but the writer of that twitter thead, @eefaevie, is (HI EEFAEVIE WHAT'S UP HOW'S THE PARASOCIAL AIR IN YOUR ENCLOSURE DOIN')

I don't know. I can't know. Unless someone opens the box.

and my god, what if they never do?

tl;dr. This is the most enriching fun I've had in months, and if the magic circle is going to widen to include me, then friend, I intend to BRING MY A-GAME.

---

FOOTNOTES

1. During the course of that mini-essay, I say the following:

"If it's someone who is not the dude but just a tumblrite who managed to catch on really quick? Well goddamn, good for them, and also A+ Wink-Nudge acrobatics. Real dude can have a peaceful time reading critical analyses of Goncharov, Javid here can quietly start introducing strange lore and running gags and other fun-with-plausible-deniability shenanigans".

One day later Javid starts answering questions about characters with enigmatic season 2 spoilery things; a little less than ten days later, we get the first fake link (which, imo, is the real start of the game).

2. This is now only 24 days after my "strange lore and fun with plausible deniability" post.

3. My dare: January 26. Javid's book code: February 4.

4. My tags on the post wherein I acknowledge that the dare has, possibly, been taken up, read: #you know what's cool? besides how #enrichment can go in BOTH enclosures #is how much you can do with html #like sure sure we've all seen the embedded links #but I remember the days of hidden source code messages #websites with delayed redirects #passwords hidden on one site to open the locked contents of another #you know #~normal things~ #I'm certain none of this will become relevant #because this is #definitely not a game