#mha 119

[bakuhatsufallinlove]

Does Izuku Think His Feelings For Katsuki Are Gross? (or, DvK2's Endless Emporium of Nuance)

This is a pretty common sentiment I see repeated, and we all know the source of it: Deku vs. Kacchan 2.

Original Japanese and official English translation.

Crunchyroll subtitles

In one translation, Izuku expresses discomfort over this topic; in the other, he outright declares it to be gross.

That is quite the difference. I gotta say, Crunchyroll’s direct “This is gross” kind of shocks me, because it functionally ignores the key adverb “sasuga ni” and translates the line the same as you would if he hadn’t said it at all. The official manga translator, on the other hand, clearly made a decision about what Izuku meant by that phrase and then dispersed that meaning across the line as a whole.

So I understand why people have this straight-forward interpretation.

I’m here to offer some linguistic nuance, because my main problem with “Izuku thinks his feelings are gross” is not that it is completely wrong. It’s that it isn’t the whole story.

There are two really important phrases to take into account: kimi ni wa ienai and sasuga ni.

To illustrate their meaning, let’s split the line into two sections:

Note: Grammatically, kara belongs in the first section. I’m lumping it into the second section for the sake of isolating the core ideas expressed in the first section and maintaining clarity in the second.

Now we’re going to break the sections down into their constituent parts. This looks like a verbatim nightmare of a translation, because it is, but trust me, it’s a useful exercise.

Kara links the two sections by showing that the first section directly causes the second. Something worth noting is that Izuku does not use past tense here—he uses present tense and indicates a continuous, unchanged state. He has not been able to before and still cannot tell this to Katsuki. I would argue this also suggests he thinks the circumstances will not change for the foreseeable future.

Important Phrase #1: kimi ni wa ienai

Ienai is the negative potential form of “to say,” which means it is not possible for him to say it. Iwanai, on the other hand, is the negative present tense, and if he had used iwanai instead, that might suggest that he has some choice in the matter. Examples in English might be, “That’s why I don’t tell you this,” “That’s why I’m not telling you this,” and “That’s why I haven’t told you this,” which all express intentional withholding despite opportunity. To use a form that specifically denies the possibility serves to center limitation, regardless of desire.

The combination of the two particles ni and wa are used to emphasize, compare, and contrast. This is extremely telling just on its own. Izuku is emphasizing the fact that, compared to everyone he could possibly tell, he cannot tell Katsuki this. He might be able to tell other people, but when it comes to Katsuki, he cannot. Ienai does not specify where the limitation stems from, but ni wa sure implies it.

Now let’s dig into the phrase that does the most heavy-lifting in the first section.

Important Phrase #2: sasuga ni

Sasuga ni is the adverb Izuku attaches to the adjective kimochi warui (gross or creepy). It is typically translated “as expected” because this kind of adverb sounds awkward in English. “This is expectedly gross” is not a sentence people say much. You might also see it translated “as I thought,” “naturally,” “obviously,” or “indeed.”

And there is something interesting here: Izuku uses a second word that means “as expected” on this page.

Yappari, which can also be translated as “in the end,” “sure enough,” or “after all is said and done.”

I researched the nuances of these two phrases, synthesizing definitions and examples from four different Japanese dictionaries/encyclopedias and two forum boards for language tutoring from native speakers. My conclusions as related to their usage here:

Yappari indicates:

an outcome that was expected (example: “I tried, but sure enough, I failed.”)

something that remains unchanged [in the state it was previously or in other circumstances]

a situation where, no matter how you think about it, you end up with the same result (example: “I was really torn over it, but in the end I gave up on going.”)

Sasuga ni indicates:

[you, the speaker] must acknowledge that this is the natural result of the situation up to this point (example: “they grew up in a big family, so naturally they are good with kids.”)

something exceeds the permissible range, or that it may be permissible under certain conditions, but not others (example: “no matter how nice a guy he is, if he was accused of something unfairly, he’s bound to get angry.”)

You can see the meanings overlap, but the sentiments are a bit different. I saw someone learning Japanese say that every time they used one of these phrases, native speakers told them they should have used the other one instead. Another learner responded that, from their observations, the distinction appeared to be that yappari is used when the speaker had personally thought about and expected this outcome, while sasuga ni suggests that everyone would agree with this statement.

I’m not sure this is true across the board; usage always varies, even among native speakers, so generalizations are only useful up to a point, but I have to admit, a bunch of little things I noticed in my research do support this line of thinking.

If yappari tends to be more reflective of the speaker’s personal thoughts and expectations, sasuga ni’s “acknowledgment of a natural result” could indeed imply external validation. This is true of the equivalent English words, at least: naturally and obviously both suggest that any reasonable person would accept it as fact.

In fact, permissible as an idea kind of hinges on social norms—what is reasonable for someone to put up with? What behaviors sit within the realms of welcome, allowable, or excusable based on your relationship?

In my opinion, Izuku feels like he cannot say this to Katsuki because it exceeds the bounds of what is permissible between them. If sasuga ni implies Izuku feels sure that anyone would agree with his assessment, Katsuki is absolutely included in that.

Izuku is not saying, “I alone think this is gross, so I can’t tell you.”

He is saying, “Considering everything that has happened between us up till now, you would obviously see this as gross, so I can’t tell you.” Its grossness is a natural result of the situation—their history, the way their relationship fell apart, the way Katsuki lashes out, how he can barely stand Izuku’s presence, let alone his emotional honesty.

Chapter 10, during Deku vs. Kacchan 1

But remember that this sentence is a fragment: the subject of Izuku’s sentence is revealed in the second half, and it is the fact that he runs his mouth when he wants to win more than he wants to save.

This is what is gross. Izuku acknowledges that the behavior itself is unpleasant, and that any reasonable person would agree with that. His whole identity as a hero is based on saving people, so he feels some real discomfort when he has to recognize that sometimes he just wants to win. In fact, he can want victory so much that it supersedes his desire to help people.

Izuku has intentionally emulated Katsuki’s practical tactics, but this is about instinctive response. He wasn’t standing there facing Muscular, thinking the winning move was definitely to scream, “shut up.” He was furious, so he wanted to win and make that guy shut up.

When the scale tips, he acts out. He talks shit. He screams at people and insults them, because that’s what Katsuki does. These are all unacceptable behaviors, socially-speaking. Katsuki constantly and intentionally acts the exact opposite of how he should to qualify as a Good Japanese Boy. Izuku, on the other hand, plays the part faithfully, at least until it demands he betray his core values.

Deku vs. Kacchan 2 showcases how neither Izuku nor Katsuki had fully accepted the heroism of their counterpart. Katsuki is uncomfortable with Izuku’s innate capacity to help others, to see their need and meet it without question. Izuku is uncomfortable with craving victory, with that indomitable drive to seek glory. They each admired All Might for the value they themselves embody, and they admired each other for the value they lacked, but that doesn’t mean their admiration was uncomplicated.

Katsuki is a loud-mouthed, aggressive jerk, but Izuku ends up acting just like him. He clearly feels conflicted about it. He’s annoyed and hurt that Katsuki pushed him away by being such a jerk in the first place. And, from his perspective, he fails every time he tries to wrangle their relationship into something less miserable. He might even be embarrassed over the simple fact that he has held on to these deep-seated emotions for years over someone who wants nothing to do with him. He wishes things were different. He doesn’t know how they could be, anymore. He wants to connect, but he can’t.

Izuku frames his inability to express this specific thought as natural and reasonable. Obviously, there’s no way I could do this. And honestly, he is probably right. After all, this is a very intimate, revealing thing to tell someone who seems to hate your guts and has for years.

At any other point in the story, Katsuki probably would have curled his lip in disgust and barked out Izuku’s exact words, “Gross.”

But in DvK2, Katsuki bears his heart to Izuku without restraint.

Katsuki confesses something painful and private to Izuku twice, at two separate moments.

Izuku has two confessions, too. Here's the first:

But the second he admits only to himself and the audience.

Maybe if Izuku had said his “image of victory” monologue out loud, Katsuki could have had his own moment of understanding:

Izuku’s reaction after Katsuki’s second confession.

Maybe Katsuki wasn’t ready to hear it, or maybe Izuku was too chicken to believe he was ready. Either way, he needed to voice both confessions, and he didn’t.

So the narrative punishes Izuku for failing to push past his own limitations.

In the battle of revealing their honne—their true feelings, their truest selves—Katsuki risked it all.

Izuku couldn’t do the same, and that’s why he loses.

Don’t forget that underestimating your opponent is one of the easiest ways to lose a fight in MHA.

But I want to reiterate, Izuku feels conflicted about this behavior and his own feelings, not ashamed.

Emotional conflict is borne from two or more simultaneous, contradictory feelings. Izuku admits that any reasonable person would see the way he unconsciously imitates even Katsuki’s bad habits as gross, but he also clearly tells us something else.

Izuku is directly expressing his own thoughts about it, and the most important phrase is nanoni, which according to online encyclopedia Kotobank, “indicates that the following is contradictory to the preceding matter” and specifically, “includes critical feelings about the contradiction between” those two things. The latter point is unique because other words often used for “but” (such as kedo, which he used earlier in the form of dakedo) do not necessarily do this.

In the final line, one little detail here is the orange highlighted nda. This is used to explain and correlate topics of discussion. The most obvious point of explanation is why he acts this way. But the use of nanoni to connect this thought to the previous one tells us that this line is also explaining why Izuku doesn’t hate it.

Katsuki is his image of victory, and that alone is the reason he does not find this part of himself unacceptable. Just like with sasuga ni, Izuku is telling us that he understands the way other people would see this situation, and he knows what he “should” feel, but then he tells us that he does not feel that way.

I know it is very easy to see “This is gross, so I can’t tell you” at the start of this monologue, skip right to “image of victory,” and walk away thinking that Izuku is ashamed of that specifically, but the details show that the opposite is true.

And let’s not forget the nuance of yappari, which implies that Izuku has personally thought about this fact over and over, but it has always been this way.

I have seen people say that Katsuki is the one letting Izuku set the pace of their new relationship and that Izuku holds back, with this presumed shame as the cause. But I don’t think that acknowledges Izuku’s perspective on their dynamic, nor the casual mutualism they build together.

Katsuki initiated DvK2: a unique, closed “event” wherein, for the first time, they each expressed their vulnerabilities as much as they were able. But immediately outside the confines of DvK2, Izuku is the one who reaches out, as a gesture of reciprocation towards Katsuki for having initiated this change.

He is asking Katsuki's opinion, but what this gesture means is, “I don’t want us being honest with each other to end there. I still want you in my life.”

And maybe for the first time in years, Katsuki actually understands what Izuku means, and reaches back.

Look at these fucking nerds.

Notice that Izuku responds to Katsuki twice. At the first response, Katsuki has offered his observations and given him valid criticism on his technique, which is a show of goodwill. But then, Katsuki continues even when the admission reflects a personal weakness, with Izuku's punch having caught him off guard. This is actual honesty, and it means that they didn't just resolve their aggression and reset to neutral peers, but that Katsuki wants to be close, too. And just like during their fight, understanding comes the second time around.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: from Izuku’s point of view, Katsuki’s shitty behavior was the only thing that stood between them, because Izuku’s core feelings for him never changed.

Izuku lets Katsuki decide what is permissible between them, because Katsuki is the one who pushed him away in the first place. He opens the door just enough to say, “Whatever you want to give of yourself, I will accept.”

After that, Katsuki is the one making the big gestures by taking time out of his own life to discuss OFA with Izuku and All Might and help Izuku by training with him, even inserting himself into situations when he isn't asked. At every point, we see Izuku receive Katsuki with warmth and then follow up with smaller gestures of his own.

Chapters 202, 209, 249, and 327.

The reason we see so much of Katsuki’s side of their relationship, especially after DvK2, is because his feelings are the ones that change the most: from dysfunctional to self-aware and accepting. He has struggled for years over Izuku’s place in his life. He didn’t understand Izuku or his own feelings, and he was wrapped up in denial. He tells himself again and again that Izuku is “beneath him,” when we know the truth is he always thought Izuku was better than him.

Comparatively, Izuku resolves his conflicted feelings about his admiration for Katsuki much quicker, because the source of his conflict was primarily external while Katsuki's was primarily internal.

Chapter 257

A little detail I love about the "I'm too blessed" moment is that Izuku thinks of his conversations with Katsuki as "normal(?)" with a literal question mark attached. Is this normal? He doesn't really know. But it's enough. Kacchan is Kacchan, explosive and outrageous and way too much, all the time. Maybe they'll never be what other people think of as "normal," but Izuku is happy just to have Kacchan as he is, and be there however Kacchan will have him.

Katsuki's ideal has always been Izuku; he tried to outrun that fact and failed every time. Meanwhile, Izuku’s image of victory has always been Kacchan, and he has just been waiting for Kacchan to want to hear that from him.

Everyone has been wondering if Izuku will ever tell him. Me, personally, I'm hoping their story will end with a mutual declaration of their shared truth.

"You have always been my hero."

[heroes-in-the-dark]

Another sketch to go along with the most recent chapter of Heroes in the Dark. If you haven't read it already, Spinner steps in to save Tokoyami from a bad situation.

[forwardrussialiveblog]

[zykamiliah]

hey! i haven't seen mha in a looong time and i've never payed attention to bakudeku (mostly because i'm not the biggest fan of bully romance), but i'd love to see your take/interpretation/analysis on it? i've been a really big fan of your svsss metas and so i just thought, "hey, you know what, i'm curious to see zykamiliah's take on a ship i've never been interested in from an anime that i haven't seen in years! maybe i'll see something?"

not too sure if you already made a post explaining it (so sorry if you did!), but i've seen enough of the sudden rise of bakudeku reblogs on my feed from your account to ignite my curiosity lol

i just really enjoy hearing about ships because they're an amazing opportunity to explore dynamics and perspectives i've never given much thought/thought about before (coming from a rare pair lover... oh gyx/lbg, my sweet...) so i'd love to see bakudeku, a ship i don't quite understand (yet!) in a more understanding, different, and interesting light! and in complete honesty i trust your judgement with insightful character and ship analysis stuff, so... yeah!

heeey jade! sorry for the wait, i've been busy with work and irl stuff :DDD but i'm here now!

where to even begin lol... well, it's important to note that the relationship between midoriya izuku, the protagonist, and bakugo katsuki, the deuteragonist, is one of the main narrative lines of the manga, at the very core of the story. katsuki is izuku's narrative foil, their character developments are intrinsically connected (specially katsuki's!), and the same can be said about the themes of heroism, of what makes a hero, who can be a hero, what type of hero society needs, or if it needs them at all, etc., questions that also tie to the evolution of their relationship.

so from the start i was sold on this dynamic because i really like relationships that are at the center of a story!! i also like relationships with a complicated history with lots of drama and ups and downs, and i like that each character has their own things going on in their lives even if they are connected and one of the most important persons in each other's lives. big big bonus guaranteed to get my full attention if they are obsessed with each other lol

the thing is, deku and bakugo are in a bad place when the story kicks in. bakugo isn't an active bully, in the sense that he doesn't constantly seek deku out to hurt him, but he IS horribly mean and hostile, and that's because for years he's felt threatened by deku (and deku's heroic qualities), and wants to push him away, because he also feels that deku is looking down on him. the story doesn't shy away from showing and acknowledging that bakugo's behavior is atrocious and needs to change, and it works towards it consistently: he eventually atones, apologizes, and changes. on the other side of the coin, deku has always been paying attention to bakugo and, despite how the latter treated him, would chase him, observe him to the point he has bakugo's moves memorized, takes inspiration from his fighting style and even imitates him to give himself courage to do something specially daring and when he wants to "win" more than "save"; bakugo is his image of victory, ever since they were kids.

i scrolled through my bkdk meta tag, since it's been yeeeeears since i was involved in the fandom, lol, and found this post that tackles the bullying issue specifically and makes some very good points, if you wanted to read it! :D

the manga eventually addresses the problems in their relationship in "Deku vs Kacchan 2" (chapters 117-119), at the time bakugo is feeling turmoils for the part he played in All Might's end. to the question of "why does deku chase and care about bakugo if bakugo is so mean to him?" ch 119 has deku answer that himself:

this fight is the turning point for their relationship, and for the rest of the manga their individual and dual development is mostly upwards. reading bnha is worth it, if anything, just for the beauty of bakugo katsuki's development.

another big aspect that got me hooked in their relationship from the very first anime episode (and first opening) is that they are

✨Childhood Friends✨

(strap in this is gonna get loooooooooong)

Childhood friends (Osananajimi) is kind of a huge trope in manga/anime, often as a romantic interest. According to some sources i quickly consulted in the internet, and some of the manga/anime I've watched, in Japanese culture osananajimi is considered one of the purest bond formed between people, with a level of closeness equal to that between blood relatives; formed at such an early age, at a time when societal restrictions didn't apply yet, the relationship is genuine because they still didn’t need or know how to hide their true feelings from each other. As the childhood friends grew up together, this is considered a special connection, somewhat different to those formed after societal norms and perceptions take precedence. Or, as makeste put it:

here we have two very young children who are introduced to each other at an age when they’re still young enough to have absolutely no secrets. they’re young enough to have not yet learned to be shy or self-conscious, or to downplay their enthusiasm so as not to let others know they care. kids that young don’t hide anything. they don’t lie or deceive. they don’t have agendas, and they assume that others don’t either. it is, in short, a very pure type of relationship in the sense that it’s honest and uncomplicated, that it is exactly what it appears to be at face value. their personalities are fully out there with no attempt at reining anything in. Katsuki witnesses the full force of Izuku’s boundless hero-worshipping energy and enthusiasm. Izuku witnesses the full extent of Katsuki’s relentless confidence and Peter Pan cockiness. both boys see each other for who they are in their entirety, and accept each other. this is a fundamental bond. there is trust built between the two of them at a critical, formative age. it’s a relationship formed so early on that it’s likely that neither of them can actually recall a time before they met the other. they are and have always been a constant in each other’s lives. they’re a lot like siblings in terms of that kind of closeness and complete understanding of the other, both the good and the bad. in fact I’d say that Izuku’s use of “Kacchan” (and Katsuki’s automatic acceptance of it) isn’t that different from a younger brother’s use of “Niisan” for his older brother. it’s very revealing of the type of relationship they have. and that includes the typical sibling squabbles as well. it’s very much a relationship that’s taken for granted; there’s no filter, no effort to hold back, no attempt at trying to tone down their behavior around one another. there is whining and bragging and squabbling and name-calling and tears, just as much as there is cooperation and respect and trust. because at the end of the day, the assumption is that the relationship will endure no matter what, so they can go at each other as hard as they can and it doesn’t matter. the other one’s presence is just a given. that’s the kind of relationship that this term “childhood friends” really encapsulates, I think.

The sudden change of their statuses when the quirks start to manifest is a major factor that placed them on opposite sides of the social hierarchy, and conditioned the way society and their peers would treat them. But despite this and the misunderstandings that happen between them and the falling apart of their relationship, the subconscious understanding between them remains intact through the years. They always flashback to their earlier memories. They probably didn't interact much in elementary or middle school, and even if they did, they interactions were already tainted by their social status and Bakugo’s hostility. They don't share their innermost feelings with anyone but each other. Like when Deku gets angry or determined to win and to surpass him, or when Bakugo screams and cries out his emotional turmoil at Deku. According to Japanese social rules those are selfish things to do. This relates to the concepts of honne and tatemae.

Japanese society is more regimented than one might believe just from watching anime. By middle school age, and even to some degree in primary school, children are expected to interact with their peers in a relatively professional way. This is especially true of relationships between students of opposite sexes. Such requirements aren't held for family or close friends, but for everyone else one is expected to be polite and not share their true feelings or say things too directly. This concept of dividing people into an in-group and an out-group (内外, uchi-soto) is somewhat hard for non-Japanese people to understand, but is central to interactions between people in Japanese culture. In fact, you can find plenty of examples of this and of the related concepts of honne and tatemae in anime if you look, but if you aren't looking for them specifically it's easy to miss. (source)

So, for example, you shouldn't show your true feelings/thoughts to other people, even more if they aren’t socially acceptable, because that may disturb the peace in the community. But because Deku and Kacchan are osananajimi that have known each other their whole life, that doesn't apply to them. By stating from the very beginning that Kacchan was Deku's childhood friend, Hori put them in a close relationship with each other with a level of intimacy, trust and a subconscious understanding not like any other. Kacchan is, in fact, closer to him than All Might himself.

Like, Deku has been calling Bakugo by his childhood nickname, Kacchan ("Ka[tsu]" from Katsuki + "-chan", which is usually used to address children or females in an affectionate way), even past the age he was excepted it to drop it. When they were 4 years old, the other kids called him "Kacchan" too, but growing up it would be seen as childish or disrespectful so they start to call him "Katsuki" or "Bakugo". This puts a level of distance between him and his peers that, regardless of what happened between them, didn't extend to Deku and Katsuki. And it had to cross Deku's mind at some point ( "Should I start calling him Katsuki/Bakugo too?") but he didn't or simply couldn't. Despite everything, he wasn't willing to put even more distance between himself and Bakugo. He deliberately refused to put formal distance between them, and more importantly, Bakugo just LET THAT BE.

___

Like, this was a great set up from the beginning for me. I knew there was a story there from the first episodes, and then "Deku vs Kacchan 1" happened, showing their childhood flashbacks and the misunderstandings that would persist until DvK2, and i was really into that lol They relationship was one of the main reasons I followed the manga.

i mean LOOK at THIS!

how i could NOT ship it i mean come on

Even their color schemes complement each other, and their costumes have the same/similar colors. they are are complementary opposites that share the same core: to become a hero, their admiration of All Might. Each of them has a quality the other lacks and needs to work on to become the heroes: heroes that win and save, as All Might put it. Selflessness and Selfishness: to help and save others, in one side, and to care for one's personal victory, in the other. Bakugo was obsessed with victory and glory, and Deku was willing to do anything to save others, to the point of self-destruction. These isolated qualities didn't made them good heroes, but combined, as the two learn them from each other, by the end of the story they really become two of the greatest heroes.

This connects with their rivalry, which is richer than any other in the manga because of the many layers to their relationship: they are obsessed with each other, want to compete with each other (for the rest of their lives!!!) and don't want the other to fall behind, specially after their misunderstandings are resolved. They also don't want to be left behind by the other. Because they love each other too much! Whether people interpret it as platonic or romantic or whatever in between (secret third they are like like four different types of greek love categories combined), they are each other's More Important Person outside of family members. Hell, Kacchan getting hurt is basically Deku's berserk button: he punches All Might in the face to save Katsuki during the end of term exam; he goes crazy protective and possessive when Katsuki gets kidnapped by the League of villains(Mr. Compress even calls him out lmao)

he goes crazy when Katsuki is hurt in front of him

and when he thought katsuki had died...

i mean. look at this romantic shit.

_

lol and i feel like i'm leaving many other stuff behind, like Bakugo's apology, and all the little moments after DvK, and all the times in the last arc where Bakugo was thinking about Izuku constantly, and the finale where Katsuki cried because Deku had given up OFA and was going to be quirkless again, and the fact that he was at the heart of the mecha suit years-long project because he wanted Izuku's dream, their dreams, to come true. but tbh I only read them the one time and need to reread the whole manga again to refresh my knowledge. and i already shipped them before all this haha.

they are amazing characters in a really well done shonen manga they have a beautiful story 🧡💚

[ordinaryoffensivemagic]

Welcome

New year, new blog, same me falling down the rabbit hole of another fandom.

This sideblog exists because there were a lot of Frieren-related things that I wanted to reblog and discuss but I didn't want to clutter up my main, which is currently focused on a different fandom.

This blog will consist mostly of images from the manga, anime, gifs, screencaps, official art, and fanart.

I'll also be posting thoughts about the new manga chapters as they release. (tagged: ordinary mage reads)

Anything beyond Season 1 of the anime will be tagged with "Frieren manga spoilers". Manga chapters are tagged as "Frieren + chapter number" (ie: "Frieren 119")

Navigation + Tags:

sousou no frieren - any posts relating to the series as a whole, including meta and discussions about plot, themes, timeline, etc.

葬送のフリーレン - the Japanese name for the series is used for posts that discuss things related to linguistics/translation, cultural context, or mangacaps with Japanese text

Frieren (the character) is tagged with just her name

Characters & Dynamics:

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Ships are generally tagged alphabetically, with the exception that Frieren is always tagged first in a pair.

Romantic ships: frieren x himmel, fern x stark

Platonic tags: frieren and fern, frieren and stark

*As a courtesy, I'm not a huge fan of frieren x himmel as romantic ship. I don't hate it, but I prefer the complexity of their canon relationship and don't believe that romantic relationships are inherently better/deeper than platonic ones.

Themes & Topics:

a mere ten years - posts that reference the passage of time and Frieren's understanding of how her years with the original party of heroes changed her

crossover - any post that includes characters from other series (either in collaboration or referencing parallels)

lost in translation - posts referring to the inherent flaws in translated media and things that aren't obvious if you only read/watch the English version

Frieren-sama tags:

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disaster elf - Frieren being a disaster (includes frieren and the mimic)

sleepy Frieren

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frieren munching on stuff

aroace frieren - examples of frieren being on the aro/ace spectrum *note: this tag includes any references/headcanons about Frieren being on the aromantic and/or asexual spectrum, even though the two identities do not always coincide

Other Character tags:

Fern is not amused

little Fern

Other places to find me:

Tumblr main: AdventureOfTheDancingGirl - (currently I'm mostly posting about My Hero Academia over there)

My twitter is a mix of various fandoms. Mostly Frieren & MHA at the moment.

[last updated: 05/03/2024]

[littleholmes]

Hi, I'm Monique 🌸 I do a lot of writing and rambling about manga and anime! To make it easy to find my posts, I've included links to my analysis posts, writings, and my AO3 below!

Note: This blog and these posts are not spoiler-free. Please do not repost or post on other websites, tiktok, etc. Sometimes there's a tag glitch so just be sure to please remove my tags first, or write ‘prev tags’ if you agree with my tags, before rbing (this includes specialty sorting tags)

-> weekly/monthly manga & manhua I read: Jujutsu Kaisen, Bungou Stray Dogs, Spy x Family, 19 Days, Kuroshitsuji, Astro Royale, Chainsaw Man. Series Ended/Complete: My Hero Academia, Dr. Stone (main & 4D Science ended), Tokyo Revengers (main ended), MHA: Vigilantes, Demon Slayer, Haikyuu!!

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A small note that my longer posts are my analysis & typically delve into actual meta/analysis and are tagged as analysis. My shorter posts are random thoughts that come to mind as I read instead of a deeper analysis, they’re light and I will elaborate in the tags if I have more to add. In my thoughts tags, you will find a mixture of both thoughts and analysis.

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• Jujutsu Kaisen analysis posts (new!-> 29 Sept/Ch 271) || thoughts + analysis about Yuji, Megumi, Toji, Nanamin, Gojo, the current manga arcs, & more [manga ended 29 Sept] • Bungou Stray Dogs analysis posts (new!-> 3 Oct/ Ch 119) || thoughts + analysis about Chuuya's corruption, Dazai, the aftermath of Odasaku, Akutagawa's health, the current manga arcs, & more [next new ch: ~3 Nov] • BNHA analysis posts (new!-> 8 Oct / special one-shot )|| thoughts + analysis posts including recent arcs, villains, the Todoroki fam, & more [manga ended 4 Aug] Dr. Stone || Tokyo Revengers || Sk8 the Infinity || Yuri!! on Ice

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[emmaelix]

Not My Dead Body: Chapter Four

I DON'T OWN MHA. THIS IS FANFICTION AND NOT CANON FOR A REASON.

This is chapter four, so if you want to start from the beginning click here, then here for chapter two, then here for chapter three. I don't own anybody but Y/n Kirishima, and only her concept. Also, I'm sorry I haven't gotten to changing the masterlist yet, but what can I say, I'm lazy.

He might not be as angry, but he's still violent. Sorry for not updating for a while, but I've had writer's block and finally decided to just power through since I don't want to abandon this one. Also yes, Mina and Katsuki are besties.

TW: Kidnapping, pregnancy, implication of *ahem* fun

Y/n sat at her desk doing paperwork, still reeling from yesterday's events. How would the killer have known they were still there and knew about the murder? They'd have to be inside- that was it! Katsuki had mentioned that their dead body's partner worked with her at the police force.

"Enji... Todoroki! Now, where is the phone number for the tip hotline?" Y/n said, searching her papers until she found the numbers she was looking for.

"Hello, Japan Police Department, Hero Precinct. If your's or someone else's life is in danger, please hang up and call 110 for a police need or 119 for an ambulance. If you need to speak with the tip hotline, please press 1-"

There was a beep as Y/n pressed 1. "Hello, tip hotline. What information would you like to pass on anonymously to the police?" At least this time an actual human answered the phone.

"Hello, this is Y/n Kirishima, I work for the JPDHP, and I would like to say I believe I know who killed the woman found a few weeks back. I believe her name was Kaina Tsutsumi, she worked for the JPD."

"You said your name was Y/n Kirishima? Any relation to Eijirou Kirishima?"

Y/n furrowed her brow. "Yes, he's my brother, but I'm not sure why that matters."

"The killer you think you know the identity of? Well, they've kidnapped your brother. They say he'll be killed in five days unless the PD gives up trying to find them."

Y/n felt a stab in her heart. She was so shocked she almost dropped her phone. "Why are you telling me that? Don't you think that's a little personal?"

"Well, Miss Kirishima, you've helped me and my boss determine you're a threat to our operation and since your brother wouldn't give up your location you've done so for us."

"What the hell do you mean by that?!"

"I mean, Y/n, that you're right. The killer is an insider. Who I happen to like very much, so I will be protecting h- them," Then the woman on the phone hung up. Y/n's stomach was churning and she was now regretting having sushi for lunch.

------------------

Y/n was still in shock as she continued putting papers away. "I can't believe it," she kept muttering, her hands shaking almost violently.

"You can't believe what?" Katsuki Bakugo asked from the doorway, a cup of coffee in his hand and papers in the other. He wore a red silk shirt with a black suit coat and black jeans today, his hair messy as usual.

Y/n felt the incredibly stupid urge to run over and begin sobbing in Katsuki's arms. She stopped herself from running to Katsuki, but she didn't manage to stop her tears from beginning to flow again.

The papers Katsuki had been holding were dropped to the floor in an instant, and his coffee was set on a shelf close to him. He moved quickly to Y/n's side, pulling her into a hug. "Hey, what's wrong? Did that jackass insult your clothes yesterday?"

"Well, yes, but that isn't-"

"Oh, I'll beat his ass for you! I'll shove a sock down his throat!" Katsuki said gleefully, looking much too happy to assault Y/n's dinner date with his wardrobe. "Wait, what do you mean that isn't what's bothering you?"

"It was an inside job. The murder, I mean. I think Enji Todoroki did it. The woman I called to tip told me that Eiji'd been kidnapped and then told me she was working for the murderer and she slipped up and called him he and," Y/n trailed off into sobs, the rest of her story inaudible through her gasping and crying.

Katsuki stiffened but immediately pulled Y/n closer to him. "Hey, it'd okay. We'll find him, don't you dare worry. Listen, it's almost five, why don't I take you home and we can eat dinner with Mina. I'm sure she's shaken up."

"Mina!" Y/n exclaimed, her tears stopping. "Oh no, I'm not sure Mina knows yet!"

Katsuki kept his arm around Y/n, guiding her to their boss's office. He knocked on the door and Toshinori Yagi opened it almost immediately. "Y/n, Katsuki, what can I do for you both? And- Y/n have you been crying?" Toshinori moved to his desk and pulled out a box of tissues, handing them to Y/n. "Katsuki, what happened?"

"Her brother was kidnapped. That's all I know because she just kept crying," Katsuki said, lightly rubbing Y/n's back as she hiccuped away her tears.

"She- she threatened me and told me that I'd told her I was a 'threat' and that they'll kill Eiji in five days if JPD doesn't give up and that the killer was an insider," Y/n said, her tears now dried as lines through her foundation.

"Katsuki, take Y/n home. Don't worry about coming in tomorrow, either of you. I know you'll probably take it hard, Y/n, so I want Katsuki to be there for you. I'll get Tamaki to fill in for you. It's Wednesday, anyway, so just come back on Monday and you'll still get paid for tomorrow and Friday," Toshinori said, looking vaguely dazed from the news of the elder Kirishima's capture.

The next half hour went by in a blur, from people telling Y/n how much her brother meant to him like he was dead or something to them pulling up at their apartment building. Then time began to inch forward as Y/n realized no one had told Mina why her boyfriend would've even been kidnapped.

Y/n stopped Katsuki before they entered the apartment stairwell. "Mina doesn't know about the body. We need to tell her everything, Katsuki. It's our fault Eiji was even kidnapped in the first place," Y/n said, watching as Katsuki's face paled considerably.

"Shit. We do, don't we?" Katsuki said, nervously playing with his hands as they began walking up from the ground floor to the second floor and apartment 2-A.

Y/n knocked quietly on the door and was greeted by Mina's bright face. Mina Ashido - fairly short in stature but making it up personality-wise - had bright pink dyed hair that fell to right at her neck. She had tan skin and brown eyes with flecks of amber.

Mina's face fell when she saw the expressions on both Katsuki's and Y/n's faces. "What's wrong? Wait, where's Eijirou?"

"He's been-" Y/n's voice broke so she paused and tried again. "Meen he's been kidnapped."

Mina's eyes grew wide and Y/n began to worry she was going to fall over or punch someone. Y/n reached out and grabbed Mina, pulling her into a hug. Katsuki cleared his throat awkwardly. "We uh, were going to make dinner so we were wondering if you'd like to come to my place to have dinner not alone not that that isn't perfectly fine, but-"

Mina stopped him. "That'd be very nice, Bakugo. I'd like that. We can talk then and figure out why he was kidnapped."

Y/n and Katsuki shared a look that meant only a few words. We're so screwed. (AN: Insert a video of Moxxie (Helluva Boss) drunkenly saying "You gon' be so facked" if you want a laugh.)

-----------------

Mina sat on Katsuki's couch, her face completely blank with the news of what had been found in the very apartment she was now in. "So he was kidnapped because... you found the dead body of a police officer?"

Y/n cringed at the simple explanation. "Yeah, pretty much. We're fairly certain that a police officer killed her, too. It's- yeah," Y/n couldn't find anything else to explain.

Mina took a spoonful of ice cream from her bowl and slowly ate it, thinking as she did so. "Well, it isn't your fault. Or anyone's, for that matter. Except for that ass Enji if he did it."

Although Y/n knew Mina cursed it still always took her aback when her friend did so. Katsuki grinned evilly. "I knew you had it in you to swear."

"I think you did the right thing, but I'm a bit pissed you didn't invite me to your murder-solving parties," Mina said, then she looked at her finger. "I'm also a bit pissed at myself."

Y/n looked at Mina's finger, trying to find what she was looking at. "What's wrong, Meen?"

"Kirishima asked me to marry him and I- I thought he was proposing for a reason," Mina said, looking guilty.

Y/n's brain went in circles trying to figure out why her brother would propose until she finally found a reason. "Meen, are you pregnant?"

Mina nodded. "I told him a few days ago and when he proposed I thought he was proposing because of the baby. Then I found a receipt this morning from a jeweler from six months ago. I was going to apologize to him tonight at supper."

Katsuki sighed heavily. "Mina, we'll get him back, you know that, right?"

Hugging her sister-in-law-to-be, Y/n said, "We will, Meens. He's right."

Mina nodded. "I know. I'm going to go to bed, I'll see you both tomorrow, right?"

"Yep. We have a few days off," Katsuki said, pulling Mina in for a half-hug. "I'll make breakfast in the morning."

Mina nodded and then left, with both Y/n and Katsuki watching her leave. "Holy hell," Y/n said when Mina had gone. "I did not expect to be an aunt this soon."

Katsuki snorted. "You've got to be kiddin' me. I hear them going at it like rabbits all night, I'm surprised they've gone this long."

Y/n choked on her own spit. "I could've gone all my life without knowing that."

Y/n moved to clean up some of the dishes. "Stay here tonight, would you?" Katsuki said, a bit softer than his normal voice.

"Why?"

"Because I don't want you getting hurt or kidnapped. Y/n," Katsuki said, motioning for Y/n to sit down next to him on the couch. "I uhm, I have something to say, but I'm not sure how to say it.

Y/n sat down, looking him in the eyes. "I'll go first then. Katsuki, how do you feel? Right now, with just me and this close?"

Katsuki swallowed, oddly nervous. "I feel," he paused. "I feel safe. I feel trusted."

"And I feel loved, Katsuki. I feel safe, trusted, and loved when you're close to me. You helped me when we were stuck at work and you help me with my work and I think I'm in love, Kats," Y/n said, taking Katsuki's larger hands in hers.

"Me too," Katsuki said breathlessly, holding Y/n's hands in his and bringing them to his chest, then kissing them. "I think I'm in love with you."

Y/n sat like they were for a few minutes, and then said, "How would you feel if I kissed you?"

"Why don't we find out?" Katsuki said, gently kissing Y/n as she inched up to be practically sat on his lap. "I feel very- loved," Katsuki said after a moment of deliberation, holding Y/n's hips with his hands.

"So do I," Y/n said, leaning in to kiss him again.

"How would you feel if I kissed you again, but harder?" Katsuki asked, shifting so Y/n was looking into his eyes.

Y/n grinned. "I think I'd like that."

@aikugo come get your man.

[chandralia]

2021 February 24th - June 23rd (leaks)

119 days.

2022 February 23rd - June 21st (leaks came out one day early 😭😭)

118 days.

[bakuhatsufallinlove]

How do you feel about the fact that Katsuki’s apology and his death are not brought up again? I was really sad they never talked about it all. Do you have any headcanons for when/how/if they ever talk?

Dear anon, you've activated my trap card.

By which I mean you've asked me about something on which my feelings apparently vastly differ from those of most people.

To answer your question, I did not expect nor even want a scene addressing the apology again in-canon. Neither did I expect a scene where they discuss Katsuki's death, though I was less opposed to that.

But let me specify this right off the bat: there is a distinction between what I would enjoy seeing and what I think has narrative weight.

And I think that's fascinating to talk about. You asked me how I feel, so get ready!

When people say they wish Katsuki and Izuku had talked about his death, what are they wanting?

Do they want to see Izuku get vulnerable and choked up over Katsuki, shed tears for him? Do they want to see Katsuki see him like that, and watch him soften and let Izuku open up? Do they want to see him take Izuku's hand and comfort him, reassure him that they won, that it's over, that he's still here, and no one is gonna keep him from getting back up again? With the implication that getting back up again means standing at Izuku's side and helping him win?

I sure as fuck do!

But do I think that kind of scene does something for the story, themes, and development of them as characters that what we actually got doesn't do? Not necessarily.

See, stories are not driven by what the audience wants to see.

Stories are driven by what the characters need.

Not what they want, what they need. Often, characters are denied what they want because it does not align with what they need, and this is the very premise of their struggle. Katsuki is a great example of this, because at the start of the story, he wants to feel superior to Izuku, but what he needs is to accept his own admiration of him.

Fanworks exist to give the audience what they want, in a vacuum, totally separate from the linear structure of the narrative. You can just pop into a scene of Izuku crying and have Katsuki kiss him better and that gets us every time, doesn't it?

But in the manga, for a scene like this to exist, there has to be a need for it to address. So, what would that need be?

I think people ask for these scenes because they are under the mistaken impression that Katsuki doesn't understand how Izuku feels about him. And I cannot tell you how much I disagree with this.

If Katsuki didn't understand that Izuku cares deeply for him, then a scene like what I described would probably be intended to tell the audience that he needs to understand how Izuku feels and, up until now, he hasn't.

But that's not true.

Katsuki knows Izuku cares about him.

At the start of the manga, Katsuki is convinced Izuku looks down on him.

Chapter 10

We the audience understand this is projection. Katsuki's admiration of Izuku makes him feel inferior, so he rejects his own self-critical feelings and assigns them to Izuku. No matter how many times Izuku shouts that he thinks Katsuki is amazing, Katsuki's inferiority complex is unfazed.

He utterly ignores it, it doesn't even register for him.

Chapters 10 and 119

Instead he doubles-down on his own frustration and dissatisfaction with himself, engaging from a point of competition, as though Izuku had insulted him rather than complimented him.

This tells the audience that the problem does not lie with Izuku, but with Katsuki himself. Izuku cannot resolve this situation with words, we've seen him try. Instead, Katsuki needs to change his own perspective.

After Deku vs. Kacchan 2, Katsuki accepts—begrudgingly and with great discomfort—that Izuku does not look down on him.

Chapter 120

Even though Katsuki reconciles this, that doesn't change the fact that he is weak. He needs to grow as a person and as a hero. Now, his struggle is not just about his self-perception, but also his real progress.

Chapter 209

We joke about Kacchan being a tsundere, because he is, but part of the reason he rejects Izuku's appraisal of his progress is because he still hasn't met his own standards yet. Katsuki admires Izuku and All Might so much; he knows what they are capable of, he sees the gulf between where he is and where they are, and he is fighting like hell to close that gap.

He won't be satisfied until he does.

Chapters 362 and 409

I've seen people talk about this moment like it is a revelation for Katsuki about Izuku's feelings.

Chapter 359

And, first of all, lemme just say that no villain has ever said a damn thing to Kacchan that he didn't already know.

Chapter 358

ShigAFO's comment does not exist to confirm Izuku's feelings to Katsuki. It exists to signal to Katsuki (and the audience) that ShigAFO knows how Izuku feels, and he is prepared to use it against them.

This is a threat. This is about instilling horror in us and bringing to painful fruition Katsuki's fears about being a weakness people can exploit to hurt Izuku.

But let's not bury the lede: Katsuki would not have these fears if he didn't understand that Izuku cares about him.

Chapter 82

Look at his face and tell me he doesn't know with every fiber of his being that Izuku would die for him.

You could argue that because Katsuki understands Izuku's heroic nature better than anyone, perhaps he doesn't consider Izuku's protectiveness of him unique. Maybe he doesn't understand that Izuku loves him specifically and, to him, this is simply an expression of Izuku's selfless, save-to-win mentality.

But that I counter with two points:

Katsuki is not dumb, guys. He is our most emotionally intelligent and self-aware character. We are shown on numerous occasions that Katsuki can read between the lines and understand someone's feelings without being told (unlike Izuku, who's a damn nerd).

The story arc of Katsuki and Izuku's relationship is predicated on the fact that Katsuki rejected Izuku, but they are both unable and unwilling to truly disentangle themselves from each other. This means that their interactions, across the whole of the series, generally focus on Katsuki accepting Izuku and his own feelings, thereby restoring their relationship. To do this, he needed to both accept himself and better himself.

As a result of the second point, the focus is not on Izuku demonstrating his love for Katsuki as the bridge of change. The fact that Izuku loves Katsuki and wants him in his life is indeed highlighted frequently, but it is often treated as a given.

I've said it before: Izuku's feelings are not the ones that change the most, Katsuki's are.

Now you might say, "Maybe Katsuki doesn't need to hear Izuku's feelings, but Izuku might still need to say them!" And you're right, that is a possibility! Even if it is a given to the audience, there could be something that suggests Izuku saying these feelings out loud would be significant or change something between them.

But that's not what the series tells us.

Izuku does not hold back about the way he feels for Katsuki. Whether he is calling Kacchan a stupid jerk or saying he is amazing, Izuku is not subtle about what he thinks—in fact, these are often his most raw, unfiltered character moments, and they are significant.

Chapter 119

The only significant time Izuku does not tell Katsuki how he feels is his image of victory moment at the end of DvK2.

Chapter 120

My conclusion about this is that Izuku has felt conflicted about his own behavior and thinks Katsuki would reject him if he knew about it, so he chooses not to bring it up.

However, there is still a narrative purpose of showing us this thought, and that is to demonstrate that while Izuku may feel conflicted, ultimately he still accepts his own feelings. Regardless of whether Katsuki accepts him or not, the way Izuku feels won't change, and he's not sorry about it.

This moment exists for a lot of reasons, but chief among them is so that we the audience can see the true shape of Izuku's heart.

And what we see is that he loves and admires Katsuki, no matter how he acts or even what kind of person that makes Izuku.

I liken it to Katsuki's All Might card moment.

Chapter 362

Listen, I would have loved to see my explody boy get his autograph, but the greatest impact of this scene is not in the question of whether he will get one, that's just the tragedy lying on the surface as we witness his death.

No, the most meaningful part of this moment is in how it makes the audience truly understand that he still longs for it, even after all these years.

I wanted Izuku to tell Katsuki he is his image of victory, but the fact that it doesn't happen signals to me that Izuku ultimately didn't need to say those words out loud for that moment to matter. Izuku reconciled the discomfort he felt about admiring Katsuki and embraced his positive feelings for him, and that's pretty damn important.

I can and will indulge in fandom to meet my heart's desires, and that's excellent. But rather than simply feeling disappointed by canon material, I think it is more interesting to allow both what happens in the story and what doesn't inform my understanding of it.

I have been planning an in-depth post about the apology and what I think people are missing when they say Izuku "didn't respond" to Katsuki, but let me just lightly touch on my objections to that line of thinking.

Many people in the English-speaking audience appear to have a very narrow range of actions they consider a "response," and allowing someone else to act upon you for some reason does not seem to count.

If you frame interactions only by what Character A does to Character B and see Character A as the only active participant, you are missing out on a lot.

For example, Katsuki catches Izuku, and we see that as a demonstration of his love, as we should.

But how is Izuku allowing himself to be caught not an action that expresses his feelings? How is the fact that he responded to an apology with his own apology not indicative of how he wants to connect to Katsuki in this moment? How does it not convey what he feels for Katsuki, what he has always felt for him?

Furthermore, I see a lot of people take for granted how silence is a choice, and it carries meaning. Much like with what does and doesn't happen in a story, there is meaning in what people say and what they don't.

Japanese as a language values indirectness; it is not a bug, it is a feature. This is partly to avoid forcing yourself onto others and causing them discomfort, but another part is trusting others to understand who you are and how you feel without beating them over the head with it.

But you'll have to wait for my full post to hear the rest of that idea.

I dunno if this is what you were expecting out of your question, anon, but I hope you enjoyed the ride all the same!

[heroes-in-the-dark]

Would you mind describing what Tokoyami look like as of now? The last chapter kinda reminded me of his older scars and such, and even made one he already had worse, but I'd like to be remembered of what he looks like currently.

Your drawings look really great and I love them, but they show him with some details that I'm not quite remembering at all lmao, like what are those things in his feathers?

Good question! I try to describe him in writing when I can, especially as his appearance changes over time. His gear hasn't changed from his time with the villains: all black shirt, pants, boots, and belts, vantablack cloak, nightvision goggles, wolverine claw gauntlets (with one broken blade), and Spinner's scarf.

I draw Tokoyami with little white feathers under his eyes. Those are stress bars! When damaged feathers on a bird are growing back, if that bird is under a lot of stress, those feathers can get discolored or malformed. And Tokoyami has a lot of messed up feathers. Sometimes crows will just get little white feathers, too, and I think that looks cool.

Here's the layout of his scars, as of chapter 119 of HitD:

He's got quite a few now. This is how I always imagine him, with his main scars being the ones on his abdomen from Overhaul and the left shoulder from Hawks. The burns from Dabi were from the war (he's had other burns before, but those healed; these ones might scar tho). The beak should also heal. Hope this clears things up!

[forwardrussialiveblog]

[shysheeperz]

Nobody'd blame me for running away at this point, but for some reason...

I'm still here.

A second ago-that sounded like...the roar of some mad beast. You usually hear that kinda howl from villains and criminals going wild with their quirks, putting people in danger. But when I hear that sound? For whatever reason, I can't just sit back. I instinctively head toward the source of the commotion.

" I gotta save the innocent bystanders!"

I mean sure, that's part of it, but...when most of those guys were going wild they seemed to be in need of some help too.

But hey, it's all good!

Just gotta have faith and wait for the heroes. I know they'll find a way to make things right.

[anamiableavocado]

[epickiya722]

Unfortunately, you're still here. Why, man?

😭😭😭 HE JUST WANTS A FRIEND!!!

😭😭😭 SEE?! LOOK HOW HAPPY HE IS!!! LOOK AT THAT SMILE!!! LOOK!!

Both are just so cute!!!

THEY'RE JUST... THEY'RE JUST SO CUTE!!! I JUST WANT THEM HAPPY!!!

[welovethecloudboytoomuch]

The hoodie has burned. The symbol of the Crawler- a fanboy who only sought to be as useful to society in his own special way- is gone. Now, all we have left is Koichi. Broken and battered but now for the first time- smiling in the face of danger. A true hero in his own right.

And oh boy, that commentary on the cry of villains? “You usually hear that kind of howl from villains and criminals going wild with their quirks. Putting people in danger. But when I hear that sound? For whatever reason I can’t just sit back. I instinctively head towards the the source of the commotion. … When most of those guys were going wild, they seemed to be in need of some help too.”

And the imaginary childhood playtime between Number 6 and Koichi? Intercut with their fight? It’s beautiful and tells the story largely without words. But when it does? “I’m here. I’m still here, with you.”

Say what you want about this also paralleling the themes of the main series, but I don’t think they’re going to be able to top this.

Koichi is a hero, one who strives to help everyone no matter who, and doesn’t need a hoodie or a hero license to prove that.

[jetblackmanga]

This is peak sibling fight.