#mentally ill about this game in such a personal level

[jabberwockprince]

starts eating drywall and pacing around the room. its been years since the game came out and everyone and their dog has said everything there was to be said about it, but. but but but

Bea saying that all she ever does is run after things she's not allowed to have anymore, daydreaming and obsessing over them to embarrassing and horribly sad degrees. that proximity and routine is all she of has. and then being so. touched. so genuinely touched that Mae was the one running after her last night when she left the party without telling anyone. "thanks for running after me" was such a loaded fucking message i keep THINKING ABOUT IT

[infizero]

my sources for shuichi being trans:

girl voice (in the original jp - voice is noticeably higher and more feminine sounding than any of the other boys)

general appearance (prominent eyelashes, fairly soft features, pretty androgynous esp when you pair with the jp voice, at certain points if ur insane enough it kinda looks like he has a binder outline)

wears a hoodie to the beach

gets really weird about having to go into the girls bathroom (obvs for different reasons but if you view those lines thru a trans lens then it honestly makes a lot of sense)

depressed and suicidal (not explaining)

im trans and i said so

[penisbilt]

the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now

[starsworldd]

𝚖𝚘𝚘𝚗 𝚒𝚗 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚎𝚜 𝚜𝚘𝚕𝚊𝚛 𝚛𝚎𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚗 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚝:

these are my interpretations, only take what resonates

moon in 1st house ⚡️: this could mean that you are highly sentimental and likely to fluctuate a lot this year. matters at home, with family, your comfort, are a top priority this year. depending on the moon sign, you will be much more caring and compassionate in that signs' matters (e.g. in leo, you may be comforted or more caring for kids or hobbies, in libra more caring/comforted in your partnerships, etc..). new beginnings. be careful not to take things too personally!

moon in 2nd house 🥖: this indicates a year in which you care a lot about your personal comfort. you may be stubborn as to take risks or to go outside of your comfort zone that year, especially regarding your finances but it doesn't have to necessarily relate to tangible things. you are much more in tune with your needs. fluctuations and/or improvements with your self-esteem may be on the table as well.

moon in 3rd house ☀️: communication, writing, and other forms of mental output are significant to you this year. conversations with others this year may be characterized by depth and nostalgia. you may also be talking to your relatives a lot this year. this placement could indicate finding more comfort in video games or social media. the moon sign indicates how conversing with others impact your emotions this year (e.g. libra: pleasant, kind, harmonic or cancer: understood, compassionate, and empathetic)

moon in 4th house 🎀: this placement means that you find peace and satisfaction at home. matters with family or home may be especially emphasized this year, maybe you're staying at home more than usual? this could indicate moving or something major happening within the family or house. if not those things, you may find that you are much more understanding and welcoming to others. maybe some home decorating may be happening too, hehe.

moon in 5th house 🌻: expressing your authentic self this year matters a lot to you. you care a lot about your hobbies and creativity this year and are much more fertile in those areas. there could be a lot fo crushes or ups and downs with romance as well. you may want much more attention from others. fluctuations with your ego are very possible and expressing your feelings in a dramatic way is also pretty likely.

moon in 6th house 💛: you care a lot about productivity and working on yourself this year (mostly when it comes to duties and work). self-improvements like fitness may be a priority too. you are prone to overworking yourself and/or to illness. emotional up and downs may seem to be an everyday thing for you this year. the moon sign shows how everyday routines will impact you (e.g. in libra relationships in everyday routines will be highlighted, in aries leadership and autonomy up will be highlighted, etc..)

moon in 7th house 🌺: you pour much of your compassion into your partnerships this year. you want to build relationships this year with sentimentality and care. it is especially important to you this year that other people reciprocate and understand you on an emotional level and it's important that you are with others this year, more than any other year you probably don't want to be alone for this one. you may be spending a lot more time with women too.

moon in 8th house 👻: unpopular interpretation but i personally think this placement could indicate moving homes, or a big change in the family but these changes usually may come with some sort of loss. you may find yourself exploring the emotional depths and traumas of the present or past more than usual. transformations internally will likely lead to a different way as to how you go about feeling your emotions going forward as well.

moon in 9th house ❤️‍🔥: adventure, philosophy, and/or traveling are things that may help you to feel internally satisfied this year. i think this placement could also indicated going away for college, university, or studying abroad. you may find that you're more comfortable to opening up your mind to philosophy and morals and in general breaking out of your usual comforts or habits. moon sign shows how exploration/adventure may show up for you that year

moon in 10th house ⭐️: you may find a boost in popularity this year, unless the moon is majorly ill-aspected or debilitated. but even so, there can be positive outcomes. you are emotionally in tune with your reputation, career/calling, and/or responsibilities this year. you may be less afraid to display your true emotions to the public eye. there may be a lot more responsibility in your domestic sphere or somehow your private/family life is exposed to others.

moon in 11th house 🥳: in your social circles there may be more women than usual. you are emotionally in tune with goals, inspirations, even social media and trends this year. internal satisfaction and comfort comes from your friends and communities this year. you may be inviting more people to your house this year, or having more parties. nurturing and helping your friends and other communities solve their conflicts may be something that keeps you happy.

moon in 12th house 🫧: you may be missing your mom or another important family figure in your life this year. maybe you feel like people aren't giving you much care or support as much as you need it. this is also another indicator for moving or going to faraway places this year. you may also feel like a hermit this year. there may be lots of fluctuations with mental health, but i think that this gives way for lots of creativity to come your way.

hope you enjoyed!

[dr-spectre]

Guess who turned 7 years old?

SPLATOON 2!!!!! Everyone's favourite Splatoon game!!!! Right? Right guys....? We love Splatoon 2 yeah....? It's the best one right.....? Totally not gonna become the middle child of the series that gets overshadowed by the new fresh Splatoon 3 and the nostalgia of the first game right.....?

Okay, jokes aside about if Splatoon 2 is actually good or not. This was the game that actually got me into Splatoon, I knew about the series since it's announcement but I couldn't play the first game because like the rest of general public, I didn't own a wii u. Still don't but I would love to have one to mod. (And play Splatoon 1 online with fan servers...)

I think Splatoon 2 really did bring a lot of cool stuff to the table and it had a lot of quality of life features and interesting weapon, sub and special concepts.

It gave us the dualies!! THE DUALIES! I LOVE THE DUALIES!

It gave us the brellas! Which.... were kinda bad at launch and still are bad till this day....

BUT! I dont wanna talk about weapons because thats BORING! I wanna talk about one of the best things Splatoon 2 gave us...

OFF THE HOOK! PEARL AND MARINA! These girls are some of the most popular characters in the series and for good reason. They are both funny, likeable, charming, witty and have developed backstories by the time Octo Expansion comes around. Plus their chemistry is top-notch and so damn CUTE! It's almost has if they are somehow more than friends and that kind of connection is canon and people who try to deny it are fucking idiots and will never be in a relationship of their own.....

Also Splatoon 2 gave us a pretty solid hero mode at launch, sure it was basically more Splatoon 1 hero mode but hey, the first hero mode was fun so more of the same is fine by me. Plus you get Marie's classic snark too while you go through levels, she's nice company surprisingly. Way better than some old ass crusty dude...

It also gave us....

totally didn't fuck up my mental health this year and last year and caused me chest pain and discomfort until I had to dig and dig AND DIG for knowledge just to salvage it and make sure my favourite character in the fucking series was given the respect she deserves....

....hypno/octo Callie.... totally didn't fuck up this villain arc for her huh Nintendo? Totally didn't throw away the depth you built up (and was shown in concept art) only to try and hastily fix it 2 years later with an obscure relationship chart no one fucking talks about, not even the timeline explainers...

totally didn't use the wrong terminology to describe her situation and made everything so much worse because you wanted a simple black and white story for the kiddies yeah Nintendo? Despite you making stuff grey in the dlc expansion so the both story modes now clash like oil and water theme wise.

And yet you still treat her like dirt. Still using the wrong poorly localised words. If I still gotta repeat to the sky one more time that callie was under hypnosis and not forceful brainwashing I might have a stroke. You can't even fucking brainwash someone with hypnosis because the limitation of hypnosis is that the person under it must be fully comfortable with the suggestion and the suggestion cannot go agaisnt their morals and ideology. AND GUESS WHAT BRAINWASHING IS! FORCING DIFFERENT IDEOLOGIES INTO SOMEONE'S HEAD! DO YOU GET WHY I HAVE AN ISSUE NOW?!?!?! JUST USE THE WORD HYPNOTISED NINTENDO! THATS ALL YOU GOTTA DO!! ILL BE SOOO HAPPY!!!

YOU TOO INKIPEDIA! I CAUGHT YOU USING THE WORD TOO MULTIPLE TIMES! you better change it... just change brainwashed to hypnotised and I would literally kiss you on the lips or something idk... I love you inkipedia but that's all you gotta change okay? Pretty please? With a cherry on top?

ENOUGH OF THAT! I WANNA TALK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE!!!

Do you know what else Splatoon 2 gave us?

OCTO EXPANSION BABY! I know people love to call this overrated now but I really don't care. It's not overrated, it's perfectly rated. It also gave us PLAYABLE OCTOLINGS! Which was a highly requested thing people really really wanted and they gave us what we asked for! Even though they lacked a lot of customisation options.... still do till this day... (Nintendo is it really that hard to come up with new hair? The community has been doing that for years for you man.)

And of course... the last thing I want to talk about...

This is probably my favourite Splatfest to date. It brought in a lot of actual genuine philosophical discussion on what kind of world is best, a world of chaos? Or a world of order? I chose team chaos because when the youtuber/streamer Etika was still around he chose team chaos and I chose that team because of him... rest in peace...

The shifty station too was phenomenonal as you got to hear Fly Octo Fly and Pearl would come in AND YOU GOT TO USE HER PRINCESS CANON!!!! IT WAS SO FUCKING COOL AHHHH!!!

God Pearl is so cool... i can't believe I actually used to dislike her. I wanna beat up teen me so badly for having such bad takes. Marina is hot sure, but, Pearl is just so fucking funny. Man what was wrong with 13 to 17 year old me....

Anyways, I wanted to ramble about Splatoon 2. It's pretty special to me as it was the reason I am here today, so I can't really criticise it as much as others do. Well... aside from one obvious thing but, I've done that many times.

Also, before I go... NINTENDO!!! BRING BACK SHIFTY STATIONS FOR SPLATOON 4!!! DO IT!!! STOP BEING COWARDS!!!!

[darling-to-death]

I'm feeling self-indulgent, so here's some DOL headcanons about the Lis taking care of you when you're sick.

Kylar -Oh he's on cloud 9. You're so helpless! -You HAVE to stay in bed, so you're easy to find! And watch. :3c -Please just sit back and let him take care of you. <3 -Which he does… to the best of his ability… -But he kinda gets sidetracked and pervy. -Like he'll make you a lovely soup, but there's a special ingredient in there you probably wouldn't want to consume if you knew it was in there. -Or he'll tuck you in for a nice nap, but you have a hazy fever dream of someone straddling you and panting. -Gosh, you woke up so "sweaty" your skin feels sticky… -He lets you cuddle with his stuffed animals to make you feel better. -It's honestly quite sweet. Those toys were a great comfort to him at one point… -After his parents turned, he didn't have anyone to take care of him when he was sick. -So he'd hug his toys to feel some level of comfort. He hopes they do the same for you. -Although he would prefer you cuddle him. -Because he gets way too up close and personal, he catches whatever bug you've gotten. -He expects to be nurtured and attended to just as he did for you.

Whitney -He does not want to get sick. -Fuck you for getting sick and putting him at risk. -Cuz he can't just leave you like this… -I mean, how's he gonna have fun if his favorite slut up and dies on him cuz of some weak-ass common cold? -So he takes care of you. "Begrudgingly." -He wears a mask the entire time. -He refuses to get too close to you. -Honestly, he mostly just drops ramen soup and cold medicine in a bag before leaving you to your own devices. -But he's always popping in to check up on you. -He'll peek his head through the door to see if you're doing any better. -Sometimes he'll gently press his palm against your forehead to check your temperature. -If it's too high, he'll get a worried look on his face. -He'll remind you to take your fucking medicine so you don't boil in your own skin. -He misses you.

Robin -Oh Robin is both horribly underprepared and the most equipped to deal with you being sick. -You've known each other your entire lives. Of course he knows how to take care of you. -But you take care of him… That's the arrangement, right? -The longer you stay in bed, the less time you have to make money for the both of you. -He shudders to think what will be done to you when you're too weak to fight back. -He panics thinking about what will be done to him. -He tries to balance his time between tending to you and tending to his lemonade stand. -He needs to work extra hard to make sure you both have enough money at the end of the week. He knows you have something saved up, but he doesn't know if it's enough. -But the more he works, the more you're alone. And you're so helpless like this. -It's a constant mental struggle trying to prioritize what you need more. -He feels selfish for wanting you to get better, because he knows that desire is partly motivated by his need for you to support him. -He plays video games beside you to try to keep your mind off your illness. -You fall asleep to it as background noise. -He likes watching you sleep. -When you're awake, he can all too often see the anguish on your face. -Sleep is the only place you're free. -He hopes you have good dreams.

Eden -He hates being sick. -Living alone in the woods means there's no one to take care of you when you're sick. -It doesn't matter if you feel like shit, if you don't keep up with your chores it could mean the difference in surviving or not. -…But that's living alone in the woods. -Now he has company. -He'll be a little more lenient with you. -He'll try to cook meals, so you don't get your germs in the food. -He'll let you bathe separately, but he still insists on washing you. -He makes an extra trip into town so he can buy you some medicine. -He'll try to be extra quiet. -He's already not much of a talker, but he'll the sounds around the cabin to a minimum. -He knows congestion can cause sinus headaches, and he doesn't want you to be in any more discomfort than you already are. -He reads silently, but he still wants to sit beside you. -He likes patting your head as you head it in his lap, so he still feels like your little nightly ritual continues even in your illness. -He doesn't wait for you to fully get better before putting you back to work. -Once your fever breaks it's back to keeping him company.

Avery -This is quite an inconvenience for him. -You had to miss your date, because you fell ill, and he looked like a fool waiting for you to show up. -When he sees you around town one day, he pulls over to yell at you. -But you look like SHIT. He can immediately tell you've come down with something. -He's still pissed, but he kinda understands… -He offers to drive you to the doctor. -He stays in the waiting room while you have your appointment. -You're honestly surprised to see him still there when you leave. -He says not to make a big deal out of it. -He can't have his arm candy looking half-dead. -Even if you are sick, looking that ragged is bad for his reputation. -He drives you home, but he doesn't drive you back to the orphanage. -He brings you to some hotel. -He knows the kind of squalor you live in. Being in that filth can't help your recovery time. -He pays for you to have a room for a few days. -Room service brings you your meals. -He calls you every day to make sure you're resting and taking your medicine. -He'll know if you're lying. -When you're better, he expects his kindness to be paid back in droves.

Sydney -He'll make sure to pray for your health from now on when he visits the temple. -He makes sure you're still eating and drinking plenty of fluids! -You can't get better if you don't give your body fuel to fight off the illness. -He likes taking care of you… -Your face is so flushed due to the fever. -Your nose is clogged up due to the mucus, so you have to pant and breathe through your mouth. -He watches your chest rise and fall with labored breaths. -…He tries to ignore that sight. -But you make it rather difficult. -The way you weakly reach out for him, the way you call out his name so soft and weak… -You really need him, don't you? -He's taking care of you because he cares. -Not for any ulterior motive. -Not for any joy on the power he has over you. -He'd never use that power to harm you after all. He's a good boy. -…But the fact he could do something, well, maybe he thinks about the possibilities a little too much. -He's happy when you're feeling better. -He misses seeing you so weak before him.

[obsessingoverthisandthat]

ANNABELL LEE

Is such a complex and lovely character, I can't. The difference between her thought process and Lenores thought process is beautiful and interesting-

She's a woman who very early in her life understood that she was not in a position of power, just by being a woman. That her life is controlled by a system everybody abides by that will never favor her. That she has to follow the rules of said system or even her family will cast her out as a mad woman, evident by the way they treat her anxiety/panic attacks. Nobody is safe. Nobody can be trusted. To keep safe is to follow the rules-

And the only way to get on top of anything, to gain even a smidge of control is to use the rules to you're advantage.

But this in turn demands of her to turn off care and empathy for others (which she is capable of btw. Annabell Lee is not just some unfeeling monster) Because factoring in how it would affect the other person, caring about another person is a risk factor to herself. And anyway, its not like anybody truly cares about her, right? Its not like there are people out there who would be willing to have empathy for her. They pretend, just as she does because it is polite. Some may even mean it on some level, but not truly. Not wholeheartedly. That's how she sees it.

She's on her own. Her true self is utterly and fully on her own.

Cue Lenore. Lenore started out just the same as any other person Annabell Lee could take advantage of. However, with one additional perk. She was a break. Annabell Lee didn't have to watch herself as closely, not maintain a facade as tightly as usual. Because she is talking to a mad woman. A woman diagnosed with hysteria, a woman shut in in the basement. She has no social power over Annabell Lee. Any accusations or similar can be explained away with her mental illness. So, with time she gets comfortable. Relaxes just a tiny bit. Lenore is pleasant company, sensible and quite smart to talk to.

She, on some level, understands Annabell Lee. And then. Then she cares.

And that is such an unfamiliar feeling. Such a dangerous sentiment. And ridiculous too, for why? Annabell is just taking advantage. Perhaps that's why Lenore is mad, for not quite understanding that. The social games and ladders.

And then the house burns down. And she grieves for a brief friend she had to leave, the first person who really cared.

And then Leo shows up.

Actually taking advantage of the rules, but in such a mad way, it is utterly baffling for her. It is the ultimate proof of care. Lenore cares for Annabell so deeply, it seems, she's willing to give away her life.

And she cracks. Because she desperately craves that. True companionship. True care. True love. And Lenore, wonderful, selfless Lenore, is willing to give her that. Does it with a smile and sacrifice.

So. The only sensible thing to do now. Is to make sure she keeps it. So, she cares back. So fiercely, she's willing to kill for Lenore. So fiercely, that Lenore becomes the only other real person in her life. The only other real person in the whole world.

It feels special. They are the only ones worth fighting for. They are a team, a unit. Annabell Lee truly cares for Lenore because Lenore will always truly care back. And that is worth more to her than a million other lives, that have never known true care even if it stood before them, waving.

Now, imagine the heartbreak when she understands, that Lenore is willing to truly care for others too. She never truly got the fact that Lenore wasn't all alone like her. That Lenore had a brother who truly cared and that Lenore became a madwoman because of said brothers death. She doesn't get it, that real connections do not require sacrifice. It is scary for Annabell that Lenore is willing to give up a lot for people, she perceives will simply not do so back.

Fact is Lenore was Annabells first and only friend. But Annabell is not the first and only friend of Lenores.

Fact is that Annabell thinks the only way to be safe and get ahead is to play by the set up rules. But Lenore doesn't see the sense in doing that if it harms her friends. Lenore would rather rip the system and rules apart than play by them. And that's always been the case.

Even if to Annabell, previously, it didn't look it. Even if Annabell thought they were the same.

And the most heart wrenching thing? Annabell will continue to act like she always has, because she values their relationship too much, values Lenore too much. Because that's how she keeps the things important to her, her life, her love, safe. And it will continue to drive Lenore away, because it requires sacrifice of people Lenore is fond of.

They will only get somewhere healthy when Annabell gains another friend and starts understanding Lenores point of view.

But Annabell is scared of that. It feels unsafe. She might become a madwoman.

So. We are at a cross point. Either Annabell Lee gives in or Annabell Lee loses Lenore.

Which. Fun. Is she gonna give in? Not without a fight, I imagine. It goes against everything she ever build up, against every rule of being she ever set for herself.

It is going to be difficult.

And there will be loss.

I'm so very excited to see it.

[dontmeantobepoliticalbut]

By Peter Rosenstein

I will surely be challenged for these views, not the least being called ageist. But as someone older myself, I am comfortable with that. It is not that I think older people are not fully capable of functioning at a very high level; they are. I just believe we must let the next generations, who will be living much longer with the results of what government does, have more of a role in determining what that is.

Based on what we have seen of this Supreme Court, its willingness to overturn decades of precedent, the time has come to expand the court for a rational balance. In addition, we should set 24-year term limits for justices, or retirement at 80, whichever comes first. Changing the number of people on the court is not a new idea. The number of persons on the Supreme Court has been changed six times since our country was founded. The U.S. Constitution is silent about how many justices should sit on the Supreme Court.

“After the Civil War and Lincoln’s assassination, Congress clashed with Lincoln’s successor, Andrew Johnson, who was rapidly undoing the ‘Radical Republicans’ plan for Reconstruction. To limit Johnson’s power, Congress passed legislation in 1866 that cut the number of Supreme Court justices back to seven, all but assuring that Johnson wouldn’t have the opportunity to fill a vacant seat. The last time Congress changed the number of Supreme Court justices was in 1869, again to meet a political end. Ulysses S. Grant was elected president in 1868 with the backing of congressional Republicans who hated Johnson. As a gift to Grant, Congress increased the number of justices from seven back to nine, and Grant gamely used those picks.”

On today’s Supreme Court, Clarence Thomas has now served 32 years, and Roberts and Alito, 19 years each. Then there was Ruth Bader Ginsburg. She was 87, and had served 27 years, when she died, clinging to her seat when it was known how ill she was.

It is only recently I have come to this conclusion regarding the Supreme Court, and on term and age limits for the Congress. We are seeing too many older men, and women, cling to power. They may still have the mental acuity to perform their jobs, but entire generations aren’t serving because they refuse to leave. There is incredible power in incumbency, and we are seeing it abused.

We are asking young people to vote for candidates old enough to be their grandparents, or great-grandparents. Some say they should revolt and change that. But the fact is, so much money is now in the game, the unlimited amount people can spend on their own campaigns, and collect from others, makes that nearly impossible. It’s rare to be able to fight incumbency and wealth.

Yes, it can happen, as in the case of Maryland Congressman David Trone (D-Md.), who is 68, and tried to buy a United States Senate seat in Maryland with $60 million of his own money. He lost his primary to Angela Alsobrooks, who is 53, whose campaign had less than a tenth of that. But she was a known entity, and elected official, in her own right.

Today, in the 100-member United States Senate, there is one senator over 90, four over 80, and another 10 over 70. I propose we set a limit of four terms, or 24 years, and mandatory retirement at 80. In the House of Representatives, which now has 11 members over 80, and 62 over 70, I would recommend a 12-term limit, or 24 years, and mandatory retirement at 80.

I have had conversations with many young people, and listened to their frustrations with their ability to move forward in politics. Many see the world differently than I do, and my belief is they are entitled to be making the decisions that will impact their lives, and not have the older generations continue to do so. I think being in office for 24 years is enough time to make a difference, and to accomplish what you wanted to do when you ran for office. And if you couldn’t do it, it is time to allow the next generations to try.

The desire to cling to power is natural. For many, the fear of retirement, and not knowing what they will do with their lives, is scary. I think one must plan for that, even politicians. They need to accept they can make a difference, even if not in office, if they really want to.

[relatableblorbopoll]

Round 1 of preliminaries, group 11

The first two places get a place on the bracket

Little reminder: there will be 2 more rounds of preliminaries, the losing blorbos of this poll still have 2 chances of getting in the official bracket

Propaganda under the cut

Mae Borowski (Night in the Woods)

"Spoilers! She's a college dropout in her early twenties, who suffers from untreated mental illness and dissociation and had a complete breakdown at college, causing her to come home. Now she's living with her parents again, but life in her dingy little hometown went on without her. Her friends are adults now - in a relationship and planning on moving to the big city, or having to waste away in a dead end job instead of following their dreams. Mae is the only one without a new adult role in life. She's not great with people either - she's blunt and often doesn't think things through, and in many ways just doesn't get the world of adults. She's also prone to petty crimes and general anarchy. She's kind of lost and purposeless, and trying to find meaning in life by desperately clinging to the past. Her decision to drop out of college probably saved her life, but it's also put her family in a tough financial situation and is viewed by most people as her just thoughtlessly doing whatever she wants. She's also kind of shamed a lot about not having a job or other productive role in life, despite the fact that her untreated mental issues are actually disabling for her. She also plays the bass real bad. Anyway, i love Mae a lot. Playing this game as a college dropout in my early twenties, sitting in my childhood bedroom in my mom's attic, back in my dingy little hometown, desperately missing my old friends who have all moved on to better, resposible things in life... yeah, it felt like the game was pointing dead at me. Given tumblr's general demographic, i figure i must not be completely alone in this"

Shigeo Kageyama / Mob (Mob Psycho 100)

"autistic. likes milk. if we reach a certain level of emotion we turn into a psychic bomb. cool brothers :)"

Barry the Quokka (The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog)

"Their only skill is working the microwave, they're non-binary, when seeing a trash bin their first instinct is to look through it, they're always the most normal person in the room, they can beatbox, and they were only hired due to being the only one who applied."

Kaveh (Genshin Impact)

"In a fantasy world, be a guy with a regular profession losing his goddamn mind. Poor guy has a guilt complex, (so true) and a lot of deep embarrassment regarding his life.(ehe) He just wants to do what he's passionate about but capitalism is evil and also he keeps getting scammed. Claims to not want anyone to know Things, goes into depth about these Things anyway. Is probably most definitely gay. Can be found face down on a table lamenting his fate. Terrible sleep schedule. (HA) He is such a guy. Wants to believe the world is a good place and people are inherently good. And wants to help people and do good himself. It's just hard. [And he has a roommate. Oh my god he has a roommate]"

"He was, and still is, regarded a genius. He aced his Akademiya days, he has the admiration and appreciation of so many people because he is oh-so remarkable. But what for, when reality is that he sits at home depressed and with guilt consuming him, faking the image people have of him, not only broke as fuck but actually in debt, drowning his sorrows in wine."

Yusuke Kitagawa (Persona 5)

"highschooler who wants to spend the rest of his life doing what he loves. is obsessed with art and beauty and it's on his mind 24/7 received help from his now friendgroup to break from his abusive foster father who he still have complicated feelings with had to move into school dorms and am struggling to live independantly since he'd rather spend money and time on his art but he's still surviving and enjoying the good times id say also ends up saying whatever is on his mind and is pretty eccentric. very passionate about what he loves. doesn't want to do anything else."

Nanami Kento (Jujutsu Kaisen)

"Ex-salaryman, now jujutsu sorcerer. During one life-and-death fight, kept talking about how it was almost six pm with is when he is getting off work at 6pm no matter what because he hates overtime. While his opponent repeatedly almost kills him. Normalest adult in this shonen anime. Teen MC: "Let's go all out!" Nanami: "No. Where moderate effort will suffice, use moderate effort." Some of his quotes from the anime: "I studied at Jujutsu Tech and one thing I learned is that Jujutsu Sorcerers are shit! Then I worked at your typical company and one thing I learned is that work is shit! If both are equally shit I'll take the one I'm more suited to." "You've faced several life-or-death situations, but that does not make you an adult. Finding more fallen-out hairs on your pillow, watching your favourite stuffed bread disappear from the convenience store... The accunulation of these little despairs is what makes a person an adult." "I don't praise or disparage anyone. I adhere to facts and judge on that basis. That's who I am. There was a time when I mistakenly believed society operated the same way." "

[azure-lily24]

Kill Bill

Listened to Kill Bill by SZA while writing this so the title was fitting I think?

Context: Hurtful things said (if you squint), mentions of killing and death and probably toxic relations, reader with feminine qualities

A/n: I saw a fic of the person writing Sylus playing a game of predator and prey with the reader (him being a stalker-) and kinda decided to see what other "dark" themes I think this man could do. This is my own spin on things and this does not relate to Sylus's actual in-game character. Please remember that :)

Reader is their own character, not mc, enjoy :3

The building shook with great force as an explosion was heard from above. The guests were startled and started to panic and rush to the exit. Those who had malicious intent decided to act upon it with the disturbance being their distraction, cutting down innocent people of power and those who hold such status in the world.

You, whoever, stayed in the shadows and supervised the people with ill-intent and used your evol on them. Focusing your attention solely on the person and muttering under your breath.

"Stop. Pain.."

The person who was sneaking up behind an innocent woman, froze and their eyes widened. Placing the person under a mental spell, their mental image changes to show their stomach gutted and their insides sprawled all over the floor. They clutched their stomach in pain and kneeled down on the floor. Smirking when the fool was reduced to laying in a fetal position while their mind plays tricks on them, you hear one of the twins speaking in your ear piece, "Hey boss lady, you might wanna leave the building, it looks like it's gonna collapse in probably less than a minute"

You were just about to respond to Kieran, who spoke through when Luke also spoke up, "And don't worry! Boss and Miss hunter have already left the building" I sigh to myself but soon I start hearing loud thuds and look around to see the decorative pillars falling down and poor unsuspecting guests who haven't left yet either get caught under the pillars or narrowly escape them. You curse under your breath and quickly run to the exit.

Ignoring cries of help and pain, your heels clacking on the soiled marble floor as you were a couple of feet away from the exit, but suddenly a pillar fell and one of the beautiful ice sculptures that was on a table near the exit fell and ice shards flew everywhere. Thankfully it was just ice, but some of the shards flew and cut some of the panicked guests, including you.

You quickly dusted yourself off and ran out the exit. But you were too late...

~~

Sylus appeared with her outside the building just a couple of minutes before. He looked down at her as she held the aether core in her hand, well the vessel of it.. As the building was starting to collapse, the twins appeared in front of him, prepared to leave the scene.

While Sylus was occupied with her, the twins were muttering among themselves.

"Where's boss lady?" "She should've made it out by now.." "You don't think someone's got her, right?" "Definitely not, she's nearly on the same level as the boss"

Miss hunter turned her attention to the twins and questioned them, "Who are we waiting for? And what are you two talking about?"

The twins stop talking and stare at the girl. Sylus, on the other hand, summons Mephisto and sends him out to try and search for you among the nearly collapsing building. The crow leaves and the girl watches as he leaves. She turns to Sylus and asks the same question.

"Sylus, who are we waiting for?"...

~~

Weeks have gone by since that day of the auction. Mephisto had failed to find you before the building had collapsed. The twins were devastated because you were their friend who they could banter with whenever Sylus didn't need them nor you.

Sylus, however, seemed indifferent on the outside yet there was a strange empty feeling inside.. He didn't have anyone to nag him about being holed up in his office, nor did he have anyone to workout with whenever Miss hunter was away..

But most importantly, he lost his enforcer, his right hand person.. the person who kept him alive.. well.. mentally..

He sighed to himself as Mephisto appeared to inform him that Miss hunter was here again

~~

It's been almost 2 months since that day happened.. you stood in front of a mirror and took off the bandages and looked at the scars the stitches left. Scars ran up your arm and down the side of your body where somehow, a fool was still alive and picking off innocent folk and you just happened to be a target. If you weren't so distracted from wiping away the ice shards and all of the poor guests left behind that were screaming and panicking, you could've heard them and dealt with them with ease, but no..

~

Nearly being slashed open, you just managed to escape them and escape the building. Scrambling down each floor level, you barely made it a couple of meters away when the building finally collapsed, kicking up dust and killing all of the remaining guests trapped inside.

Your body felt like it was on fire as you tried to stop the massive gash on the side of your body from killing you of blood loss while you looked around to see if Sylus and the twins were still around. You tried contacting them through your ear piece but somehow it was swiped from your person.. probably from either the escape out of the building or the encounter from the foolish idiot that tried to kill you..

Looking around more, you spotted your bike that was still here and yet.. the others were nowhere to be found when suddenly you hear the voice of that hunter girl who appeared just two weeks ago..

"Sylus, who are we waiting for?"

Her innocent looking eyes gazed up at him as he shook his head and started walking to the car they arrived in. My eyes widened as I realized that Sylus was leaving me..

Rage started to rise but the pain was overpowering.. I quickly and carefully moved to my bike and sped away, leaving the others and leaving the scene.

~

Toss away the bandages, you slip on your jacket and head out, remembering that Sylus would be attending a banquet where he would buy out from an arms dealer. You smirk to yourself and decide to show up and announce your return from the "dead"..

Putting on your helmet, you walk out to your bike and sped off, leaving Linkon City, where you were hiding from Sylus and go to return back to the N109 Zone..

~~

The familiar red tinge and the dark sky of the N109 felt welcoming to you as you rode through, speeding up now that you were out of the beautiful night sky of Linkon City.

You pulled up to the place and put on an elegant mask that fit well with the black dress you wore, as well as a jacket to cover up your scar. Looking around and smirking when you see a familiar car parked not too far from you, signaling that Sylus was here and the possibility that he brought that girl with him as well. This just made your plan even better..

Walking inside and showing your invite, the bouncer allows you in and you look at the extravagant place. The ceiling had a starry sky, and the people around wore colors you would see in a galaxy. Those who wore masks were either body guards or those who would rather keep their identity a secret in hopes to avoid being targeted by undercover killers..

Walking around and greeting other guests who attended, you spot two familiar crow masks that were nearly hidden in the shadows. You smile as you turn and start walking towards the twins.

They looked surprised to see an unknown guest walking towards them and move to push them away, but you smirked and spoke,

"Why.. I'm hurt.. 2 months have passed and you two don't even look a bit happy to see me? Maybe I should just leave again.." The twins were shocked to hear your voice and Luke reached up to inform Sylus of your return when you grabbed his wrist and shook your head. "Keep my presence a secret and maybe you two will be spared from me~"

You chuckled as they nodded and kept their mouths shut, scared but also confused of why you didn't want Sylus to know that you were back.

Walking away from the twins, you spotted the hunter girl. She was idling around and chatting with those who would entertain her. She wore a dark purple dress with blue and black accents, and every time she would move, you could see the glitter that would imitate stars. You sigh to yourself and already know that Sylus had probably bought that dress for her.

You walked up to her and smiled, talking in a voice that's a bit higher than your normal tone. "Hi miss, can I just say your dress is absolutely stunning, where did you get it from?"

She smiled and shook her head, "I got it from the place at the Grand Center and it was a gift from my partner." Anger started to rise from that word she used to describe Sylus, but I kept my emotions in check and nodded.

'I knew Sylus for nearly five years and yet she's only been around for two, almost three months and this shit happens', you spoke out in your mind and sighed.

"Well since it seems like your 'partner' has the pockets, might I strike a deal with you?", you held out your hand, knowing this girl probably doesn't have enough knowledge to know when a woman is being shady, unlike men..

She looks at your hand and tilts her head in curiosity, "A deal for what?"

You smiled and beckoned her to follow you, "Come with me and I'll show you, I would rather prefer if not a lot of people saw the protocore I've acquired." You internally smirked as she nodded.

'This was too easy~'

You felt a pair of eyes on you as you led her out into a corridor, away from public eyes. You stopped once you were sure no one saw the two of you leaving the main floor and turned to her. She looked at you with curiosity as you reached into one of your jacket pockets and pulled out a protocore. It was a larger core from the usual ones you would see. You looked up and saw that her eyes had widened and she looked at the core in your hand in awe.

"That's incredible!, where did you get it from miss?", she asked with so much excitement, it reminded you of a child who had just seen the biggest candy store in the world.

You opened your mouth to reply when suddenly, an oh-so-familiar voice was heard and a certain snowy grey haired man appeared from around the corner. He looked beautiful in the suit he was wearing, a black suit with blue and red accents and bits of embroidery showing stars.

"It's a fake.. no protocore would ever form like that.." Sylus spoke in a condescending tone to try and intimidate me. I only scoff and tilt my head, putting a hand on my hip.

"Are you calling me a scammer, sir?", I smirk and the fake protocore in my hand shifts and turns into a small blade. The hunter girl backs away and Sylus glares at me and waves a hand, holding me in the air with his power.

"You would be a fool to try and lay a hand on her..", Sylus slowly starts to close his hand, the force of his evol increasing as he strangles me in the air. I smirk and focus all of my attention on him..

"Pain.."

His eyes widen and I am released from his hold. Landing on the floor as Sylus holds his head in pain as his mental image changes and burning pain clouds his mind. He lets out a groan as he tries to fight, yet I keep my focus on him and smirk while doing so.

Miss hunter looks scared as I do, looking worried as Sylus kneels down to the floor and looks up at me with pain in his eyes. I cross my arms and release him from his mental torture. I take off my mask as he recovers and stands up from the floor.

"Long time, no see.. missed me?" I smirk as Sylus looks shocked for only a second but quickly composes himself. Miss hunter shared the same reaction as she quickly recognized me. "If only you waited just one more minute back then.." my bottom lip pokes out to pout, as if I were mocking him.

Sylus sighed in annoyance and pinched the bridge of his nose. "If you were alive all this time.. why were you hiding these last two months?"

I smirk and played with the small blade in my hand, "You tell me, how would you feel if you were probably on the brink of death and saw your boss leaving you behind, huh?" I shrug off the side of my jacket that hid my scar and proudly show it to Sylus. "A clean cut from my arm.. to my waist.. nearly dying and yet you had the nerve to busy yourself with a little girl whose purpose has already been fulfilled..". I turned my gaze to her and glared at her and spoke,

"Burn.."

Her eyes widened as she cried out in pain as a burning sensation clouded her mind. Sylus quickly waved a hand, bringing you closer to him and holding your throat in his hand. You smirked as he looked at you with such anger.

"Why so serious? After all, she resonated with you and got the aether core, therefore, she's useless now.." you smiled as she cried out in pain again, begging you to stop it.

"Call it off, or else you'll actually die this time.." Sylus threatened yet your eyes widened when you realized what he had said. Miss hunter cries in relief when released from her mental torture, keeling down on the ground as tears fall from her face.

Sylus unhands you. You back away and look at him with a look of betrayal and anger. "Seems you couldn't cut off a loose end, but don't worry.." you spoke as you looked down. Sylus glanced back to check on her but that painful feeling returned and soon, when he looked up at you, the small blade was no longer in your hand. He turned and saw it lodged deep into Miss hunter's heart...

"I took care of it..."

~~~

(WOOOOOOO I wrote this in the span of two hours while Sylus held me at gunpoint from 30 minutes of that- also while I was writing this, I realized that reader's evol seemed quite similar to the blonde girl Jane from Twilight. Anyone else thought of that or was it just me?)

[gabrielsbubblegumbitch]

DROP YOUR DX FOR VOX !!!!! Please and thank you.

I would like to preface all my posts on headcanons related to psychology and mental illness with a disclaimer: diagnosing mental conditions, especially personality disorders, can be extremely challenging. It's a complicated process that relies heavily on a psychologist's interpretation of facts, making it susceptible to biases. Personality disorders cannot be diagnosed based on surface-level observations and are not just labels that we can assign to people like in the case of MBTI. Additionally, I am not a clinician with any expertise in diagnosing people. Therefore, the following post should not be taken as a reliable professional opinion. It's simply my interpretation of the internal mechanisms that may be responsible for the behavior of certain characters in my fan fiction. Furthermore, I want to make it clear that I have no intention of stigmatizing people with personality disorders by associating them with villains. A personality disorder does not determine someone's character or make them a bad person. Some characters may be evil because of the choices they make, not as a result of their mental conditions.

(I've already posted some stuff here so I'm not going to repeat myself.)

Okay, so, Vox has Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). It's crucial to distinguish this from "common narcissism" (people often described as "narcissists" by others just because they are egotist assholes; kinda ableist, you shouldn't do it because it's extremely stigmatizing towards people suffering with actual NPD) . While those individuals typically function well, those with NPD exhibit all the traits – grandiosity, egocentrism, attention-seeking, intense power fantasies – but as it's a disorder, these traits lead to inflexible and maladaptive patterns of behavior and cognition.

NPD has its roots in intense feelings of shame, low self-compassion, and self-loathing. In my interpretation, Vox has always felt inadequate. His father inherited an enormous amount of money, establishing a media conglomerate in the 20's. Vox's mother, captivated by the world of movies, used them to escape her reality as a trophy wife. Despite her dreams of becoming an actress, Vox's father, possessive and protective, prevented her entry into the entertainment industry. As a compromise, he made their son a child actor, with the condition that it would be temporary. When Vox grew older, he was expected to transition to learning business and other skills, ultimately to take over the family's empire.

So, Vox was never enough for either of his parents. His father thought of him as annoying and unserious due to his talkativeness and exaggerated behaviors, attributing it to growing up surrounded by actors. As for his mother... Vox turned out to be a terrible actor, struggling to convey emotions that weren't bombastic and over-the-top. Being a teenager is humiliating enough, but imagine being a teenager bad at something and forced to do it for a worldwide audience, when the whole production crew is annoyed with you. Fortunately, he grew up to be devilishly handsome (not to be a simp, I just believe someone must be handsome to endure the ethereal punishment of having their face swapped for a TV screen) and entertaining, leading them to make him a TV host and media personality.

Anyway, NPD is all about creating a perfect self and projecting it to the world when you're deeply ashamed of your true self. It means that, no matter what you're doing, you're constantly concerned about how it looks to other people. You constantly play an exhausting game, trying to win gold stars of social admiration for every-fucking-thing, guided by superficial ideals of wealth, perfection, beauty, and, above all, power. One reason Alastor's existence bothers Vox so much is the fact that he cannot comprehend the idea of someone choosing radio over his "objectively better and correct" medium. Vox lacks the ability to understand nuanced sentiments, which ironically makes him thrive in Hell. In this anarchocapitalist, lawless society, survival of the fittest prevails, and this is a game he excels at playing.

Generally, the best approach for individuals with NPD is to pull them out of delusional thinking by confronting their beliefs about the world and themselves with reality (it should be performed by qualified therapist, especially when someone hasn't completed any kind of therapeutic process yet). However, in Hell, Vox's behavior was no longer in violation of social norms; on the contrary, it was highly rewarded. Consequently, he completely lost his shit, became unhinged, and began acting on all his previously suppressed urges. He finally fulfilled all narcissistic power fantasies and became (almost) untouchable. Now, he's ready to kill anyone who questions him, seeing it as threatening to his fragile image of the perfect self.

He exhibits strong bipolar tendencies. Most of the time, he's power-tripping in a semi-maniacal state. Periodically, he undergoes deep, depressive episodes, locking himself up in his apartment and avoiding interaction.

Constantly guarding this fragile image of the perfect self that he built is exhausting. The bigger this image gets, the more fragile it becomes, like a house of cards. And guarding it becomes more and more exhausting. But there's nothing scarier than the idea of the facade falling apart and people seeing him as he is: imperfect and vulnerable, damaged and ashamed, rotten and evil. Deep down, he knows he's unlovable, and it hurts. He knows that true love exists; he craves this ultimate form of admiration and devotion, but it requires vulnerability and honesty, which he's not capable of. He's only vulnerable with Valentino, and only occasionally when he's intoxicated or when Val fucks every last thought out of his body. He's very much a controlling top insecure about his masculinity, so the latter happens rarely.

Also, drugs. Oh, do this man enjoy some coke. Other drugs and booze, not so much; they make him feel less in control. But getting coked up, going out, causing a scene, killing some poor souls, and relishing this feeling of being completely untouchable? Feels so good.

When it comes to Alastor, he hates him because he's jealous. Despite all his efforts—building a perfect persona, a perfect company, perfect entertainment—this stinky, outdated, and boring radio demon gets so much attention and admiration that should be his. Moreover, he feels that Alastor can see right through his bullshit. He's so paranoid about it that he's almost certain Alastor knows about his childhood traumas, about his death, about all his truths, and could one day broadcast it for all people of Hell to hear. So, he needs him dead.

Note: these headcanons (especially Vox's past) are very important part of my fanfiction. Please feel free to use them in your fics but I'll appreciate if you tag me 🩷

Velvette hc | Valentino hc | Vees + Angel hc | VoxVal hc

[2hoothoots]

In all honesty, the funniest thing about this trio (lili/dogen/raz) is the context— like Lili is the daughter of the HEAD of the psychonauts, a prestigious line dating back to the founders, known for their capabilities with fern and then you have dogen who’s the son of another line of prestigious psychics concerning both ACTUAL MURDER and animal telepathy

And then you have like

Some fucking circus dude

Like Raz is a fucking prodigy in itself but from the outside view he is really just “some dude— oh wait, oh shit.” These bitches go to parties and take smug satisfaction in introducing local circus man who also saved the world

yeah, pretty much

(BUT ALSO joking aside this is kind of one of the reasons i think they thematically work so well as a trio! mini-essay under cut)

because that’s exactly it, right – Lili and Dogen both grew up immersed in this world. they’re part of it, part of the community, their families are intimately linked with the founding of the Psychonauts. Lili’s dad is the Grand Head, the boss of this organisation that Raz, meanwhile, is so desperate to join. because Raz is the outsider to all of this – he so badly wants to be a part of the action, the heroism, the community. (and also, sure, we find out in PN2 he technically has that family connection too – but he also has, uh, really good reasons not to make that public knowledge lol)

so many of Lili and Raz’s interactions in PN1 turn on the fact that Lili finds camp so routine as to be entirely boring, whereas Raz is so unashamedly passionate about everything. he’s so completely starry-eyed to get a glimpse into this world, and meet the heroes from his comic books – and his enthusiasm ends up being infectious! it’s what Lili needs to break out of her own apathy, and they start conspiring and arranging midnight rendezvous and going on this whole adventure together… and the rest is history.

i just really like how that setup – Lili and Dogen having grown up with the Psychonauts, Raz being an outsider – manifests in a unique dynamic for each of the pairs, y’know? i write Lili and Dogen as childhood friends. they’ve known each other the longest of the three, they have so many shared experiences, and i think on some level they understand each other the best because of how they’ve come from such similar places. Lili and Raz have this incredible shared passion, they hype each other up and feed each others’ senses of wonder and enthusiasm. and for Dogen and Raz – Raz is one of the only people who treats Dogen as just a person, first and foremost. he’s not cowed by his family’s reputation at all, he doesn’t have any of the baggage that so many people do when they hear the name “Boole”... it’s so unexpected and refreshing for Dogen that he can’t help getting attached!

(and not to get too deep, but it’s especially compelling to me when you consider how the game’s narrative around psychic powers is one that parallels neurodivergence, mental illness, trauma, and broad themes of “otherness”... it’s a thread i like to tease at sometimes around how communities can form, and things can bring people together and individuals can find each other and be seen in their shared experiences. it’s funny but it’s also sweet! it’s really sweet to me.)

[anim-ttrpgs]

Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy, and Themes of Disability, Mental Illness, and Criminality.

Back Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy on kickstarter before May 10th if you want to help a disabled person with limited ability to work pay his bills.

Verisimilitude, What Would a Person Do?

To understand Eureka’s themes regarding disability, mental illness, and criminality, you first have to understand its verisimilitude.

“Verisimilitude” is defined as “the appearance of being true or real,” and it is a big part of the core design ethos behind Eureka. It is a very realistic game.

We aren’t necessarily of the opinion that “realism” is a better design choice than stylization overall for RPGs, but it is a better design choice for Eureka, because we want the PCs to be very normal, believable people who make believable, organic decisions in extraordinary situations. No matter what anyone says, the mechanics of a TTRPG strongly influence what kind of stories are told with it, and what characters do in those stories. So if we want characters to make realistic decisions, the world they inhabit and interact with must be constructed of realistic rules.

Even though there is a small chance that they may be a supernatural creature, PCs in Eureka are still not fearless action heroes, chosen ones, or anything of the sort. They’re normal people with jobs, friends, and families who get mixed up in mysterious and/or dangerous situations, often against their will. They are fragile, vulnerable, imperfect, and they, largely, know it.

“Composure” is a mechanic that helps you know it too. I’ve given a deeper explanation of the Composure mechanic in the post linked here, but I’ll give a very very very condensed version in this post. Composure can sort of be thought of as “emotional/fatigue HP,” (and no, it is NOT “sanity”) it acts as a guideline for how well your character is handling the situation, and when it gets low enough, it starts to have serious mechanical effects as well, because a character’s stat modifier can never be higher than their current Composure level. Fear, hunger, and fatigue all lower Composure, and eating, sleeping, and bonding with one’s fellow investigators can all restore it, at least for normal people. More on that further down. All you really need to know for now is that when Composure gets below zero it starts eating into HP, so characters can even pass out or die from loss of Composure, and also one single bullet is enough to permanently cripple a character, and the rate of Composure loss during combat reflects how serious that is for the characters.

Grievous Wounds

It isn’t too uncommon for RPGs to have some sort of “flaw” system, whereby in character creation you can give your PC “flaws” or some kind of penalty, and usually get that balanced out by being able to add extra bonuses elsewhere, and these “flaws” may take the form of disabilities.

Critical Role’s Candela Obscura, the whole document of which is one of the most egregious examples of liberalism and toxic positivity I’ve ever seen in the TTRPG space, takes this beyond just character creation, and makes it so that if a PC receives a “scar” in combat that reduces their physical stats, their mental stats automatically go up by an equivalent amount, and proudly asserts that to make any mechanic which functions otherwise is ableist. I think you can probably tell what I think of that from this sentence alone and I don’t need to elaborate. Getting bogged down in all the failures, mechanical and moral, of Candela Obscura would make this post three times as long.

I actually do think that as long as you aren’t moralizing and patting yourself on the back this hard about it, “flaw” systems in character creation are a pretty good idea in most cases, it allows for more varied options during character creation, while preserving game balance between the PCs.

But in real life, people aren’t balanced. The events that left me injured and disabled didn’t make me smarter or better at anything—if anything, they probably made me stupider, considering the severity of the concussion! Some things happened to me, and now I’m worse. There’s no upside, I just have to keep going by trying harder with a less efficient body, and rely more on others in situations where I am no longer capable of perfect self-sufficiency.

Denying that a disabled person is, by definition, less capable of doing important tasks than the average person is to deny that they need help, and to deny that they need help is to enable a refusal to help.

This is the perspective from which Eureka’s Grievous Wounds mechanic was written.

When a character is reduced to 1 HP, which by design can result from a single hit from most weapons, they may become incapacitated, or they may take a Grievous Wound, which is a permanent injury with no stat benefits. Think twice before getting into a shootout.

Grievous Wounds don’t have to result from combat, they can also be given to a character during character creation, but not as a trade-off for an extra bonus.

“But then doesn’t my character just have worse stats than the rest of the party?” Yes, didn’t you read the above section? There is no benefit, except for the opportunity to play a disabled character in an TTRPG, and this character will probably have to be more reliant on the rest of the party to get by in various situations. Is that a bad thing?

Monsters

Just like mundane people in Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy, monsters are playable, because they are regular people. I’ve gone over this in other posts and also you can just read about it in Chapter 8 of the Eureka rulebook, but the setting of Eureka doesn’t have a conspiracy or “masquerade” hiding or separating supernatural people from normal society. They exist within normal society, and a lot of them eat people.

Most RPGs consider monsters to just be evil, they do evil for evil’s sake. RPGs that seek to subvert this expectation often instead make monsters misunderstood and wrongfully persecuted, but harmless. Eureka takes a wholly different approach.

There are five playable types of monsters in the rulebook right now, and it’ll be seven if we hit all the stretch goals, but for simplicity’s sake this post will just focus on the vampire. Despite them applying in different ways, the same overall themes apply to nearly every monster, so if you get the themes for the vampire, you’ll get the gist of what Eureka is doing with monsters in general.

I mentioned Composure above, and how it can normally be restored by eating food and sleeping. Well, vampires can not restore their Composure this way. They don’t sleep, and normal people food might be tasty as long as it isn’t too heavily seasoned for them, but it doesn’t do anything for them nutritionally. Their main way to restore Composure is fresh living human blood, straight from the source. To do what mundane PCs do normally by just eating and sleeping, vampires have to take from another, whether they’re happy with this arrangement or not. They do not, of course, literally have to, and a player is not forced to make their vampire PC drink blood, just like you don’t literally have to eat food, but they do and you do if you want to live in any degree of comfort or happiness, or else they’d eventually just sit at 0 Composure and not be able to effectively do anything.

There’s a reason that this is a numerical mechanic and not simply a rule that says something like “this character is a vampire and therefore they must drink blood once every session,” and that is to emphasize and demonstrate that the circumstances a person faces drive their behavior. In America, there is a tendency to think of criminality and harmfulness as resulting from something of an intrinsic evil, but in my experience and observation, people do not just wake up at like age 16 and decide “I think I’ll go down the criminal life path.” Through their life circumstances they have been barred from the opportunities that would have given them other options. People need food, food costs money, money requires work, work requires getting hired, but getting hired requires a nearby job opening, an education, an impressive resume, nice clean clothes, a charismatic attitude, consistent transportation, and so on. For people without, criminality is something they are funneled into, which becomes harder to avoid the longer they go without consistent access to their basic needs. The choice will be between taking money from others by force or trickery, or running completely out of money.

As the Composure counter ticks down, a vampire, or other playable monster, is going to encounter much the same dilemma. There is little to no “legal” or “harmless” way for them to get their needs met, even if they do have some money. Society just isn’t set up for that. And no your kink is not the solution to this, trying to suggest every vampire get into sex work is like one step removed from telling every girl she should just get an OnlyFans the minute she turns 18, or that women should just marry a man and be a housewife that gets taken care of if they want their needs met.

Playable monsters in Eureka are dangerous, harmful people. They were set up to be.

“Oh well then the vampire should just eat bad people!” You mean those same bad people i just described above? See this post for answers to all the other arguments people are going to make to try and absolve vampires of causing harm.

Society not being set up for that brings me to next reading/theme: Monstrousness as disability, and monsters as takers.

Mundane human characters restore 2 points of Composure per day just by eating food and sleeping, but vampires do not, they can’t. To restore their Composure they have to take from others a valuable resource that everyone needs to live and the extraction of which is excruciatingly painful and debilitating (blood). No one knows what happens to blood after a vampire drinks it, it’s just gone. Vampires are open wounds through which blood pours out of the universe.

This is a special need, something they have to take but cannot give back. Their special needs make them literally a drain on society and the world.

Even in so-called “progressive” spaces, there is a tendency to consider takers, people who take much more than they give back, such as disabled people, as something that needs to be pruned, with the mask over this being the aforementioned total denial of the fact that disabled people take more than they can give.

In this way, vampires and other playable monsters are, inarguably, “takers,” but in positioning them as protagonists right beside mundane protagonists, Eureka puts you in their shoes, and forces you to at least reckon with the circumstances that make them this way, as well as acknowledge their inner lives. You have to acknowledge two things: That they are dangerous, harmful people who take more than they can give, and that they are people. Because they are people, Eureka asserts that they have inherent value, a right to exist, and a right to do what they need to do to exist.

One final point is that of monstrousness as mental illness. Mental illness is a disability, one pretty comparable to physical disability in a lot of ways, so all of the above about disability can apply to this metaphor as well, but there are a few unique comparisons to make here.

It’s not the most efficient, but there are a couple of loopholes deliberately left in the rules that allow vampires to restore Composure without drinking blood. Eureka! moments can restore Composure, and Comfort checks from fellow investigators can restore Composure.

When I was writing the rules for how monsters regain Composure in accordance to these themes, I came to a dilemma where I wasn’t sure if it was thematically appropriate for them to be able to regain Composure in these ways, but ultimately I decided that yes, they can. It works with themes of mental illness, which is mental disability.

People with mental illnesses may have the potential to be harmful and dangerous, but study after study, including my own observation, has shown that mentally ill people with robust support structures and agency allowed to them to handle tasks are much less likely to enact harm, be that physical violence, relational violence, or violence against the self. So that’s why I kept that rule in for playable monsters. Being able to accomplish goals, and having friends who are there for them, makes the harmful person less likely to cause unnecessary harm.

I couldn’t really figure out where to fit this paragraph in so I’m sticking it here right before the conclusion: Vampires are especially great for this because they’re immortal, and because they always come back when “killed.” They can’t be exterminated, they aren’t going away, there will always be problem people in society, no matter how utopian or “progressive.” They’re a never-ending curse, who will always be a problem. The question is how you will handle them, not how you will get rid of them.

In conclusion,

Eureka is as much a study of the characters themselves as it is the mystery being solved by the characters. It is a harsh, but compassionate game, that argues through its own gameplay that yes, people do have needs which drive their behavior, many people do have special needs that are beyond their ability to reciprocate, and failure to meet the needs of even a small number of people in a society has high potential to harm the entire society, not just those individuals whose needs are unmet.

And Candela Obscura sucks.

Back Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy on kickstarter before May 10th if you want to help a disabled person with limited ability to work pay his bills.

If you want to try before you buy, you can download a free demo of the prerelease version from our website or our itch.io page!

If you’re interested in a more updated and improved version of Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy than the free demo you got from our website, subscribe to our Patreon where we frequently roll our new updates for the prerelease version!

You can also support us on Ko-fi, or by checking out our merchandise!

Join our TTRPG Book Club At the time of writng this, Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy is the current game being played in the book club, and anyone who wants to participate in discussion, but can’t afford to make a contribution, will be given the most updated prerelease version for free! Plus it’s just a great place to discuss and play new TTRPGs you might not be able to otherwise!

We hope to see you there, and that you will help our dreams come true and launch our careers as indie TTRPG developers with a bang by getting us to our base goal and blowing those stretch goals out of the water, and fight back against WotC's monopoly on the entire hobby. Wish us luck.

[kookidough]

sierra is sooooo complicated to me like. i could go on about her for so long & also i wish the writers did certain things with her character (which i will get into later in this rant) so ya here we go

firstly her childhood is . very clearly messed up?? it’s established that her mother is Ultra Obsessed with chris and i think sierra mentions being a 3rd generation chris mclean scholar at one point which implies that obsession just runs in the family atp😭 before even going on the show she’s grown up in an environment where this level of obsession is Normal so she doesn’t see anything wrong with turning out the same way

since her mother is like . obsessed with chris & stuff that’s probably what would bring sierra to watching total drama in the first place and i personally feel like she’d fixate on it because it was a group of teenagers her age, people she would like to be friends with if that makes sense? i can imagine she’d be a pretty odd child without many friends so that’d maybe be a reason for her to latch onto total drama, maybe why she latched onto cody too because like. she thinks he’s cute and they have things in common (like theyre both pretty geeky) so she gets pretty parasocial about it because, as mentioned before, her mum being obsessed with chris is just Normal to sierra so she thinks it’s normal for her to be obsessed with cody (spoiler alert girl: it’s really not)

while she’s on the show i feel like she doesn’t change / gets worse because chris sees her exhibiting Mental Illness and just… actively encourages her behaviour? and the other contestants do nothing to stop it, like how most of the time (e.g. paris) team amazon get mad at cody for sierra’s behaviour instead of helping him out for some reason??? no one tells sierra her behaviour is wrong so she just. Continues to get worse until shes out of the competition😭

this is where im gna interrupt with a canon divergence because like . personally i think in the episode where votes were revealed and cody was revealed to have voted sierra Every Single Time, sierra shouldve gotten over him!!!! it was the harsh truth she needed to hear, the dose of reality that cody is NOT interested in her and she needs to move on. she couldve had good character development, building her relationships with other characters and showing off her skills. maybe she’d still be eliminated in drumheller because she made cody that birthday cake as an apology and then kaboom or whatever idk just some way to keep her elimination the same

going down this train could’ve made her character in all stars Actually Interesting ! we couldve seen a side of sierra that kept some of her old eccentric vibes but had her head in the game this time instead of being focused on a boy, especially since cody isnt even in that season

and of course lastly i just wanna say i’m not excusing her weird actions or her creepiness at all, she has some Extreme Flaws and all the stuff she did was absolutely not okay, i just like rotting and seeing maybe why she acted the way she did and i wanted to drop my own two cents on interesting avenues her character couldve went down :3 i know everyone in td is some form of stereotype and sierra was an obsessive uberfan but she couldve still been that after getting over cody, in fact im disappointed that she knew SO much about the cast yet didnt use any of their weaknesses to her own advantage, she couldve dominated the competition😭

so uhhh yeah thats my thoughts on sierra, i probably over-read her to filth but shes very complex to me and i wish certain aspects of her character were done differently, she had a lot of potential especially in all stars but um Everyone had their potential destroyed in all stars so i’ll overlook that

[ramshacklefey]

No but serious. Dungeons & Dragons is one of the least flexible systems out there. So whenever I hear someone asking, "Why can't I do X in DnD?" or "How would I do (thing that the system is totally ill-suited for)?" my first response is just "GURPS."

For those of you who aren't familiar, GURPS stands for "Generic Universal Role Playing System." I always say it's like the Linux of ttrpgs, in the sense that it's less a system and more a framework that you can use to do whatever you want with.

And I really do mean whatever you want. You want high fantasy? Done. You want gritty realism in a dystopian world? Got it. You want superheroes? Good to go. Super tech space opera? Oh boy we got you there. You want magic systems that aren't based on spell lists? Go for it. Horror games where character death is a constant and very real threat? Sure thing.

You can set up your game to be anything from a complex data driven grinder to a cinematic rules basically optional flight of fancy.

You can play characters who are anywhere from realistically squishy humans to god-like super beings.

Characters personal flaws and strengths can have a direct impact on mechanics. Character species can have a direct and serious impact on mechanics.

The existence of so many options can make GURPS seem overwhelming at first glance, but if you are willing to put in a bit of effort, it's actually a very simple system to play. Most of the hard work is front-loaded into setting and character creation. Once play starts it runs as smooth as can be.

It's totally possible to play it with just the two core books, BUT there are dozens of books that are nothing but tips and advice for how to build a particular type of world or a particular flavor of campaign.

And the books, while not nearly as pretty as DnD books, are laid out in a way that makes it incredibly easy to find exactly the information you want.

Some more mechanical things that I particularly like about it (under the cut):

Characters are created on a point-buy system, but you don't just buy your basic stats, you also buy your skills, advantages, and secondary stats. And you can gain points back by dropping stats below average or taking disadvantages.

The advantage/disadvantage system. This is sorta the core of the character building, and it is *so* much fun. See, rather than pick out a class or species, you have a list (selected by your GM from a much larger list) of things you can buy that will have mechanical impacts on you in the game. Basically, an advantage is anything that opens up more possibilities for you in-game, and a disadvantage is anything that closes off possibilities. They can be superpowers, species traits, cinematic plot armor, personality traits, or things like chronic illness, bad temper, physical or mental disabilities, or being doomed by the narrative.

Simple dice system. To play a GURPS campaign you need three d6. That's it. All checks and saves are done by rolling 3d6 (low rolls are better than high). This has an additional advantage over the d20 system in that there is a probability curve. You're more likely to roll numbers in the mid-range, which makes both critical successes and critical failures rarer, and therefore more satisfying.

Your target roll is adjusted, rather than adding/subtracting from the roll itself. Say you're trying to, idk, hack a computer. Your skill level doesn't affect your dice roll, it affects the number you need to roll in order to succeed. This makes things a lot simpler on the player's end, imo, because there's less they need to keep track of. (You're trying to roll under the skill check, so whatever the base difficulty is, the GM just adds or subtracts your skill level from that).

The basic stats are on a much tighter scale, and they make a lot more sense. Human average is a 10 in everything. When you make your character you can buy higher stats or take lower ones and get more points to spend on other things. All stats cap out at 18, because that's the highest number you can roll. At a 10 strength you are a normal person. At 18 you're basically Superman. You'd have to roll a critical failure not to succeed in a strength check, and remember: critical failures are far less common than in a d20 system.

I could keep going ad infitum here, but instead I'll just close with:

Come with me boy, play my games! We'll have cowboy times in space!

[stellar-mop]

The Coffin of Andy and Leyley has me thinking about gender and gender roles a lot. I know other people have done more in-depth analysis of this, but I'm just gonna throw my thoughts out into the void of tumblr (the void is welcome to yell back, just be nice please)

I think one of the things that makes these characters fascinating especially for me as a vaguely-agender nonbinary person is like the places I can see where their gender is impacting their interactions and choices. Like changing the gender of the characters would fundamentally change their story and personality (love y'all's genderswap AUs tho, this is not an objection).

Something I'm not sure how to articulate super well is how the game interacts with like neurodivergence gender stereotypes. On the surface level they line up with the "women are emotional and men aren't allowed to show feelings" set of gender stereotypes. But I think there's another layer if you look at it through the lens of how societal pressures around mental illness and gender intersect especially in like school-aged kids/teens. Like Andrew being the "easy child" and Ashley being... Ashley. In not-particularly-nuanced terms: "boy" neurodivergence shows as acting out and being a problem child (which Ashley does), and "girl" neurodivergence gets hidden via masking and passivity (which Andrew does). I think it's neat that this is contrary to societal expectations - like this would be a very different story if Andrew was a pushy chaotic mess and Ashley was apathetic but seething under the surface. Because gender! What's even up with that?

Less sfw thoughts under the cut, including some coffincest stuff. Warnings for unhealthy relationships and attitudes towards sex:

The way Ashley and the mom talk about sex is fascinating. I've read some really good analyses on here about Ashley thinking about sex as transactional and I think she gets that from her mom. In that one scene ("you fuck her") the mom asks Andrew something like "what does she give you to make it worth it?" Like, the only reason she can think of for why Andrew wants to spend time with Ashley is sex. That says a lot about the mom as a person (also wow she really does see zero value in Ashley as a person wtf), and probably the way Ashley was raised to think about sex. And that's a very gendered (like cishet women specifically) view of sex. Like sex in a relationship as something to be tolerated, and for Ashley "another way to keep him around".

But I'm also wondering about the flip side of that, like is the mom only tolerating the dad for sex? Because I don't really get the impression that she likes him very much, but they textually have a very active sex life. If so, this is also sort of counter to societal gender roles/expectations. I really don't like the parents but they're such fascinating characters too.

I guess my point with all this is like we got distracted by the cannibalism and murder and incest and demon summoning, but there's some really neat and subtle stuff about gender in here that I want to talk about too! It's just so well written there's so much depth

*slaps roof of game* this bad boy can fit so much dysfunction!