#mental health being one of em
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Little rant and probably a controversial opinion, please don't burn me at the stake for that If i asked you to guess how many dazai anon accounts have i blocked here till now, what number would u think of? Bc i just checked - i currently have 9 of their accounts blocked. 2 from this week alone. And it's not like i go around hunting for them. I just randomly open tumblr to check what silly things did ppl say about my art, and then i see 50 different reblogs, comments or asks from dazai anon alone, being no longer only mean to Chuuya or skk, but bashing my art or telling me to off myself!!! Yay!! And u know, it wasn't a problem in the beginning. The stuff they write is comedic with how stupid it is. I could also interact with em smh (ngl, they left me for a good while after i drew them and chuuya making out that one time). And as i said, before they didn't attack me personally. But then i started getting comments that i shouldn't interact with dazai anon bc something something they're mentally unstable? Like im sorry, but how is this my problem. They come to me and regularly tell me to hurt myself, but i can't even reply to them bc "sab, it's no use, they're sick smth smth smth, just block them"?? Like bruh aight, it's just that sitting silently actually starts to affect me. Bc no matter how many accounts i block, they come back with a new one the moment they realize they're blocked. And the whole carousel of "block, dont interact" starts again. I just think it's not really alright to tell ppl that they can't in any way stand up for themselves? Why do i have to care about personal wellbeing or a sad backstory of someone who doesn't respect mine? Why should i even know about their problems? They're a complete stranger to me and i don't really go around reading random people's biographies on the internet. Like aughhh it's seriously starting to annoy me now,,,, i'm not saying ppl ACCEPT what dazai anon does, but using the excuse that they're not okay mentally just doesn't sit right with me, idk. Mental health problems should never be an excuse for hurting others, imo.
#sab yapping#this became longer than i intended#idk what im even talking about bc it's not like it's gonna change anything#ppl tell u that someone who harasses u is just mentally unstable so it's alright for em to just go around saying all that stuff#you as an artist shouldn't rile them up yada yada it's gonna help#spoiler: it doesn't bc yall just dont see the mess that r my notifs when they make a new acc each week#and like im currently on hiatus for a lot of reasons#mental health being one of em#i have my problems too but i dont go around being mean to ppl bc i disagree with em about some fictional characters oh god#sorry for the rant but im angy
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christian knows jack is autistic but never let him get diagnosed because 1. he's ableist and 2. autistic people aren't allowed to to enter any medical field. yes, you read that right. yes, still to this day
#christian went one further and never let jack know. because of the Shame. and denial. and disgust#lost headcanons#and its educational#there are autistic people in medical and mental health fields! they're undiagnosed#i had a team of people assessing me when i got diagnosed#neurologists and psychologists#three of 'em were autistic. one was neurotypical#you could tell the neurotypical one because she was the one who didn't speak directly to me at any point. she only spoke to my mum#the other three. the autistic ones. treated me like. a human being#anyways my mum was/is autistic. but she never got diagnosed#because officially she was my carer. and if she got diagnosed she would have lost that title#and therefore lost her carers allowance :/#its fucked up isnt it? personally i think the medical field could do with more autistic people#i mean it already HAS but i mean. more. and people who can open about it without losing their damn jobs
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Okay, so APPARENTLY the world's LIGHTEST, SOFTEST, SLOWEST, and BARELY PERCEIVABLE touches get me??
Too fast? Won't work as well. Not almost a phantom touch? Won't work as well.
Jeez, I can't IMAGINE what it'd be like to have a partner with the coordination to work more than one extra soft t-word tool at a time, pffft. Two makes his hands get confused, fjdjdj.
If I somehow ended up in a space where a group of friends or something all got their hands on like, those little fluffy fake grass pieces or something and decided to all go after me at once? I dunno... I think I might end up on the floor. QuQ'''''''
#I'm... I'm extra bold about talking about details of what's going on in my mind right now because my partner's out of town#potentially for MONTHS#and... I got no lers#not that he's much of one to begin with pfft#but he tries? dkdjdj#maybe I WANNA be a giggly mess '>u>#and maybe I WANNA be flustered and told how adorable I am the whole time#maybe being swooshed up by positive attention would be good for my mental health okay don't judge me I'll cry big tears QuQ#I'll do a real big sad#but it wouldn't be a real big sad if somebody was like “this tiny lee - Imma get 'em heh heh”#... GAH - I suck at this#I HATE asking - it takes the fun outta it#I want people to KNOW I'm good already and to just SHOW up and “corner” me and then attack me with silly fluffiness#... metaphorically and physically I guess#jellybean tv broadcast#sfw tickling community#sfw tickle community#tickle#sfw tickle#sfw tickle blog#sfw tickles#tword content#sfw tk community#ticklee#lee mood time#it's the Jellybean TV Lee Special!#(it's not even special it happens ALL the time send help QuQ jfjdj)#sfw tickle thoughts#tickle thoughts#tickle things
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GRRRRR I HATE IT HERE I HATE LIVING WITH MY DAD AND STEPMOM IT'S THE WORST!!!!! I AM FUCKING MISERABLE.
#weed screams#i just wanna snap and yell at them for traumatizing me. I'm so angry. I'm so pissed that I've had to deal with so much bullshit here#I've only been here a week after moving out of the apartment i shared with my brother and I'm already going insane again#i have to buy my own food despite there being plenty in the house. I'm not allowed to bring dishes to my room even for just a few minutes.#there's two large excitable not well trained dogs that bite and scratch me#the cats in the house have to hide in the basement all day (to avoid the dogs) and i feel so bad for them#i feel like im the only one who actually tries to relate to my stepsister. i feel bad knowing she has to stay here too.#my stepmom makes rules without TELLING ME. and then gets all bothered when i don't automatically pick up on em#and the wifi sucks shit so i can't play splatoon#i can't wait to move to New York i just have to wait a little bit longer#enduring the horrors once more till i can escape to the big city#this living situation is both infuriating and saddening. there is NO REASON to justify how stressful it is to be here.#like. when i moved out of this place the first time my mental health improved so suddenly my therapist said i didn't need to see him anymore#that's not a fucking coincidence. my stress and anxiety has a root source and it's this hellhole of a house.
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something that I think is funny [and by that I mean fills me with rage] is the fact that like. Shockblurr is really popular, but if u look at a lot of old fanon and even some recent interuptations of it... It's totally just shockbee in disguise. Like so many fics and things I have seen with them turn Blurr into this hyperactive, immature bot who is emotional and very morally driven esp with his friends and is social... Like. That's Bumblebee, that's hundred percent Bumblebee Blurr doesn't have many friends and those he does seem to be more like family than anything, he's not that immature and in fact seems to take himself too seriously at times. And I doubt he has rock solid morals when he works for the blatently evil and morally dubious government. [Im not saying hes like a super bad guy or anything but I highly doubt hes never had to... Bend his morals to do his job before.] You guys just invented shockbee lite but drew the wrong bot </3 like come on fellas I am pspsppspsp towards u with shockbee so bad please make content of it if fucking megah*ead can get popular Shockbee can too its all I ask how many more posts do I have to make do u want an animation with them. An entire zine, can I make a shockbee week. How do I make this look any more tempting-
#ramblez#for now my solution is spam art trades and get the shckbee art I need to hold over my mental health until Im done being mad abt seeing...#particularly strange and kinda stupid ships the T*FA fandom just invents and tries to get popular-#anyways those zine and week ideas are ones I have had before even tho I doubt many people would care for em-#I have thought abt making my own shckbee zine just like.. Entirely made by me tho#I think it would be a fun project idk#I think abt it...#anyways stan shckbee bc we keep getting robbed by ships I would swear were made via random number generators-
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Me: Why r my adhd meds making me feel worse not better :( Also I am the meanest person alive I shall hide in my room and sleep forever from guilt
A few weeks later
*Gets diagnosed with Bipolar* OHHHHHHHH
#NOW WERE GETTIN SOMEWHERE#now: to find out if the issues focusing are all bipolar or also adhd#and how the heck to get adhd meds thst dont ruin the help of the bipolar meds im trying#if these meds are even the ones but i have high hopes cause they work for mom!#THIS COULD BE IT#rambles#disabilities#i always suspected bipolar a little bit cause genetics but thought most likely not#suspected a lot MORE 2020 on as all the stress exacerbated symptoms#but i really didnt want it to be true#and now even looking back to being a kid#so many things clicking i feel so STUPID#its like realizin all my cryin & procrastinatin & feelin stuck doin things i hate wasnt me just bein lazy but mental health issues as a kid#realizing i might not be evil after all! TWO!!#still should stay in my room until i can wean off the adhd meds though just because i understand my outbursts doesnt mean i can excuse em#all i can think to do lol#the thing that scares me is how it comes out of nowhere it didnt happen very often as a kid and was a lot of bottled up anger#or run around the yard about it#i wonder if i have mixed affective state#it just goes from manic to depressed and vice versa on a DIME its scary
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i've been slowly working on the intro story to my self ship au and. i'm actually really excited about it.
#i can't wait to do more stuff with this actually#ive been having a lot of art block due to mental health stuff so just being able to write is at least nice#but im also getting ideas. gay ideas. embarrising ones even#((also if anyones curious. most of the intro is just my si having a crisis and somehow getting a carrot to have a huge gay crush on em lol))#please dont mind me rambling ((thats probably what you came for tho))
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"Is there something wrong with my pants?"
Summary: Jinx's comes home after getting half of Zaun out of Stillwater with a doubt on her mind.
Pairing: Jinx x fem!reader
Wordcount: 1.4k
Authors note: I laughed so hard at this scene that I had to write something based on it. Also, guys, I'm absolutely refusing to accept the ending of episode 6 for my own mental health.
masterlist
The hideout is still, the quiet hum of the machinery and the flicker of a dim lamp your only company. You've been waiting for Jinx, trying not to imagine all the chaos she’s causing out there. You know she’s been working on something big, but you’re never quite sure exactly what until she shows up.
The door slams open, and in she bursts, her energy almost tangible as she steps into the room. Jinx is practically glowing, a grin stretched across her face that matches the wild sparkle in her eyes. Her clothes are messy, but she’s hardly bothered by it, her usual chaotic aura taking over.
“Guess who just pulled half of Zaun outta Stillwater?” she announces, her voice thick with excitement. She practically bounces in place, her fingers twitching like she’s about to explode with more energy.
You blink, surprised. “Wait—half of Zaun? You mean you—”
Jinx nods, cutting you off with a quick motion of her hands. “Yeah! I snuck in, all stealthy-like, dodged the enforcers, and got them out. No one even knew what hit ‘em! They’re gonna be talking about this for ages, trust me.” She leans in closer, her face lighting up with that grin that’s both wild and contagious. “I’m like their ghost, except, you know, way cooler.”
You can’t help but smile at her enthusiasm, though a small part of you wonders how she managed it without being caught. She’s reckless, but she’s also clever in her own strange way.
Her voice drops a little, a mix of excitement and something softer underneath it. “It felt good, y’know? Being the one who saves the day for once.” She rubs the back of her neck sheepishly, glancing at you like she’s half unsure if you’ll think it’s stupid.
You step forward, catching her eyes with a soft smile. “I’m proud of you, Jinx. You did something good today.”
Her eyes widen slightly, a little surprised at the words, before her usual grin returns, if a little softer now. "Well, I don’t always blow things up, y’know." She shrugs, still trying to play it off like it’s no big deal, but you can tell she’s pleased.
“Yeah, but you always make it exciting," you reply, stepping closer to her, your voice warm. "Only you could pull something like that off and get away with it."
Jinx laughs, her energy rising again, and she twirls around once more, feeling the high of her success. "Well, they won’t be calling me ‘crazy’ for much longer! They’ll be calling me a hero soon enough—just wait!"
You smile, watching her, knowing that her idea of ‘hero’ is always going to be a little different from the norm. But you wouldn’t have it any other way.
After the rush of adrenaline begins to fade, Jinx’s usual wild energy starts to settle, leaving behind a quieter, more tired version of her. She lets out a long breath, her grin softening as she moves to the couch, her steps a little less bouncy now.
“You know,” she says, her voice much softer than before, “sometimes, all that sneaky, saving-the-day stuff takes more out of me than I thought.”
She drops onto the couch with a sigh, sprawling out, but then pats the empty space next to her, glancing up at you with a mischievous smile. “C’mere. You’re not gonna leave me hanging after all that, are you?”
You raise an eyebrow but walk over anyway, sitting next to her. As soon as you do, Jinx pulls you down beside her, her arms wrapping around you like a vice, dragging you closer as she snuggles into your side.
“Perfect,” she mutters, resting her head against your shoulder with a contented sigh. Her usual wild energy has faded, replaced by something softer, something that only ever seems to appear when she’s with you. She lets out a small, satisfied hum, clearly enjoying the comfort of just being close to you after everything.
“You know, you’re the only one who doesn’t think I’m a total freak," she says after a few moments of quiet, her voice more vulnerable than she usually lets on. "You’re the only one who gets it… and me." She nuzzles into your side, her arms tightening around you slightly.
You smile softly, resting a hand on her back, your fingers gently tracing the familiar lines of her jacket. "You’re not a freak, Jinx. You're just... you. And that’s all I need."
She glances up at you, her eyes bright, but there’s something softer there now, something deeper than the usual spark of mischief. "Good," she mutters with a quiet chuckle. "’Cause I’m never gonna change." Her grip on you tightens a little, and she settles further into your side, clearly at peace now. “So, I’m gonna stay here and cuddle until the world falls apart again. You cool with that?”
You chuckle, feeling the warmth of her body next to yours, the chaos of her day finally falling away as she rests against you. “I’m more than cool with that.”
Jinx lets out another satisfied sigh, her eyes fluttering closed as she relaxes even more, completely at ease in your arms. And for once, everything feels calm—just the two of you, wrapped up in each other, in a world that’s spinning too fast for anyone else to catch
Jinx stays nestled against you for a while, the chaos of the day melting away in the quiet comfort between you. Her breathing has slowed, and she feels more relaxed than she has in hours. The soft hum of the hideout is the only sound, but then, out of nowhere, she shifts slightly in your arms, her mood taking a subtle dip.
You feel her tense, just for a second, and her voice comes out a little softer than usual. “Hey… um… do you think there’s something wrong with my pants?”
You blink, not sure if you heard her correctly. And then, you glance down at her—her eyes wide, her lips pressed together like she’s genuinely worried. It’s such a stark contrast to the wild, unpredictable energy she usually exudes. The sudden vulnerability in her face, combined with the seriousness of her tone, is almost too much.
And before you can stop yourself, you burst out laughing. It’s not mean-spirited, just genuine, surprised amusement. The ridiculousness of the question, paired with the look on her face, catches you off guard.
Jinx blinks at you, her eyes narrowing slightly in confusion as she watches you laugh. “What?” she asks, her voice a little defensive, though the corners of her mouth twitch in response to your laughter. "Is it really that funny?"
You try to catch your breath, still chuckling. “Jinx… you—" You wipe your eyes with your sleeve, grinning. “You’re worried about your pants? Look at you! You’re the last person who should care about that!”
She pouts for a moment, her arms still around you as she pulls herself a little closer, almost like she’s trying to hide. “It’s not funny, okay?” she mutters, her voice quieter now, though there’s still a hint of that pout on her lips. "That enforcer made me feel stupid... and I didn’t like it."
You stop laughing, realizing just how much it’s bothering her. You gently tilt her chin up to look at you, the playful tone fading as you meet her eyes. “I’m sorry, Jinx,” you say, your voice soft but sincere. “It’s just… you’re telling me this, and then I look at you, and I’m like— … Who cares what she thinks?”
She stares at you for a moment, the pout fading as she lets out a small breath. “Yeah, but still...” she trails off, still fiddling with the fabric of her pants.
You grin, brushing a hand through her hair as you pull her back into you. “You’re perfect, Jinx. Those pants? Totally you. No one else could pull them off like you do.”
her head resting against your chest as she lets out a soft sigh, the weight of her earlier worries starting to ease away. “You’re the best,” she murmurs, her voice barely audible. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
You smile, kissing the top of her head. “You’d probably blow something up, but I’d still be right here.”
And just like that, the tension fades. She’s back to her usual self—still a little quirky, but reassured and relaxed in your arms.
#jinx arcane#jinx x y/n#jinx x reader#arcane jinx#jinx/you#jinx x fem!reader#jinx posting#jinx league of legends#jinx lol#jinx
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From one burnt out student to another
This semester has been an absolute nightmare for me, so welcome to the resulting post where I try to help other people who are in the same boat!
How about we run through a quick list together, okay?
Unclench your jaw, relax your shoulders, relax your face, unclench your fists
Are you sitting in the shape of a C right now? *hitting you with a broom* straighten your back out!!
Maybe get up and stretch while you're at it!
Have you taken your meds today? If not, go get 'em.
Have you eaten enough today? Coffee/energy drinks are not a meal!!
What have you eaten today? Do you need to get something to snack on?
Have you had any water today?
Do you need to rest? There is NO shame in taking a nap or relaxing. If someone does shame you, send them my way
How long has it been since you moved from where you are right now? Maybe move to another room if you can.
How long has it been since you looked away from your screen? Take a little 5-10 minute break to rest your eyes :)
How long has it been since you've showered? (No shame in this one either, it's okay if you can't do it. You're not judged here.)
Do you need to get into some fresh, comfy clothes?
If the weather in your area will allow it, can you open a window or go sit outside?
Affirmations:
My grades do not define me
I am more than a grade/a gpa
I am allowed to make mistakes
I am allowed to rest
Taking breaks is necessary for my well being
This semester/school year will not last forever
It's okay to take time for myself
I do not need to be productive all the time
I am capable
I am smart
I do not need to perform to perfection all the time
My mental/physical/spiritual/emotional health is more important than school
It is okay to ask for help
Asking for help does not make me weak or less capable
Assignments should not be valued over sleep/food/self care
If you have the energy, maybe try some of these:
Reach out to a friend/family member/mutual
Change your sheets
Take your trash out
Pick stuff up off the floor if there is anything
Do your dishes/run the dishwasher
Do a load of laundry/put any clothes away
Journal
Schedule any needed doctor's/dentist's/therapy appointments
Leave your home for a little bit
Go do something you enjoy
Create something
Go for a walk
Cook your favorite meal
You are doing amazing, and I'm so proud of you. You can and will get through this. You're not alone <3
As always, please feel free to reach out or send me an ask if you need someone to talk to!
#school#studyblr#study tips#studying#university#college#high school advice#college advice#university advice#school tips#student life#exams#finals season#study motivation#study blog#student#study aesthetic#study inspiration#mental health#mental heath support#study notes#burn out#burnout
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STILL INTO YOU
yandere batfam x cat villain! reader (+extra!!)
synopsis: moments wherein the batfam n co. realize that after all this time they’re still into you
status: unedited.
[AUTHOR’S NOTE:] Super sorry for the lack of fics everyone!! Lately I found out that my DID symptoms have gotten worse and that I’ve experienced a full blackout (and possibly more, I just have no memory of it). So I’ve just been trying to recuperate my mental health for a while with art related stuff. Which, on the positive side of things, means that I’ll be releasing a Webtoon (pilot) around this July!! Hope to see you guys there during the release!!
Can’t count the years on one hand
That we’ve been together
I need the other one to hold you.
Make you feel, make you feel better.
You never realized how much Bruce knew you until you two sat down and had a meal together. Why? You might ask. Well, you were supposed to have a dinner date with Tim today at the manor, but he was unfortunately caught up on a case. You were about to cancel it, maybe cause some chaos in town and then chill with Jason as revenge for your bestie bailing — but Tim insisted you hung out with his father instead.
The pair knew it was the only way for you to (A) Behave and (B) not sleep with Jason for the nth time that week.
Gazing at all your favorite foods displayed upon the excessively extravagant and expensive table you realized that aside from the second youngest, Bruce knew you the most out of everyone in the Batfamily by virtue of his contingencies and overall time as the Batman while you were training to be Catwoman’s successor.
It was so odd, seeing him so calm and not so hostile when you were around. Eerie.
“I’m sorry.”
“Hm?”
“I always saw you as a threat. Treated you like one. But you were just a kid stuck in a situation you didn’t have a hand on. I’m truly sorry. For treating you that way.”
“. . . Isn’t it your job? No hard feelings really. I’d be creeped out if you treated me so nicely — not the food though this is very much welcomed.” You ranted as you stuck a fork into your steak, pointing it at Bruce’s face. Yet, as much as how you were failing to achieve proper etiquette he didn’t seem annoyed more so . . . surprised?
“I hope to see you have dinner here again next week.” His hands stretched to awkwardly pat your head.
“Depends, will I have more of Alfred’s steak again?”
It's not a walk in the park
To love each other.
But when our fingers interlock,
Can't deny, can't deny you're worth it.
Koriand’r wasn’t an idiot. She knew about Dick’s lingering feelings for you.
Perhaps she may be. Considering the fact that she still tried to be in a relationship with him even then.
“Shit. Kitty? Kitty! Wake up you hear me?!”
“. . . I’m. . .” You coughed, groaning at the pain it triggered all throughout your body “ . . . here . .”
You raised your hand, too weak to reach his face you settled with holding his own. Dick squeezed your intertwined hands with a pained expression , and an intimacy unfamiliar to the alien.
But that wasn’t what made Koriand’r finally understand how hopeless their relationship was.
It was the fear in his face. His pretty features morphed into one of horror.
Ah, even after all this time. Dick couldn’t live without you.
Cause after all this time I’m still into you.
I should be over all the butterflies
But i'm into you (I'm in to you)
And baby even on our worst nights
I'm into you (I'm into you)
Let em wonder how we got this far
Cause I don't really need to wonder at all
Yeah after all this time
I'm still into you
Jason spent many, many grueling years under the influence of the LoA. And not once did his body forget the feeling of you.
The butterflies, the heart wrenching pain of being apart from you, and the fleeting, venomous hatred you two shared.
After all, it was your name that escaped his lips the moment he awoke from the dead. Your face the first on his mind. Your voice that he longed to hear again.
He had plenty of time to prepare for this moment. Months? Maybe even years.
“Hey, cool helmet. You a Deadpool fan or . . ?”
But even then, your appearance still made him more nervous than confronting his family once more. More nervous than fighting the villain that ended his life.
“Yikes, awful cut you got there. Need me to patch you up buddy?”
You had grown. He had too, even if it was through some magic, deus ex machina water. Seeing the change in your features, how you shed your youthful look of naïvete and grew into a beautiful/handsome/pretty specimen almost made him break all his plans just to be with you again.
“I know that you’re shy and all but I need words.”
“Yeah.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be here til the vigilantes show up.”
For his revenge’s sake he hopes that you’ll stay for longer.
Recount the night that I first
Met your mother
And on the drive back to my house
I told you that, I told you that I loved ya.
You felt the weight of the world
Fall off your shoulder
And to your favorite song
We sang along to the start of forever
It was one of those nights when you intruded on the Batfam’s nightly patrols. This time your victim was Damian. And strangely, no one else. He explained that the rest were taking a break.
Leaving out the fact that he poisoned them with some self engineered laxatives.
It was relatively calm until a heist suddenly started in one of the banks you wanted to pick off. Damn.
“Hey, I didn’t know you listened to [Favorite Artist(s)]” You eyes widened at the sound of the music playing the background as Joker’s men began to surround you and Robin.
“Just a casual listener. How did you meet my mother anyhow?” Damian sheathed his katana. Opting to take down his foes by hand to hand combat as he peeled his eyes and ears to listen to you.
Besides he could see that your eyes weren’t on him anyways, so there was no point in showing off.
. . . Not that he was doing that.
“Huh? Well, I know everyone really.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“What if I don’t want to?”
He sighed, bashing a poor guy’s face with his knees, his hands adding force with a pull — yikes. “I don’t know why I bother with you.”
“She hated me at first. Courtesy of Cat Woman and the Bat being together.” You turned to him, and he ducks.
“Then I lost someone really, really important to me. More than anything in this world. More than this world itself.” Your whip meets a goon behind him. Both of you hear a splat sound as the man falls to the floor. ���And while everyone was calling me insane, when everything was breaking down around me. She was the only one who didn’t judge me for . . . the things that I did.”
“She supported me and was there for me no matter what.” You gaze at the blood on your weapon and cringe. “And then I realized your dad was an absolute bastard for leaving her behind. So I took up the mask again and made it my mission to make his life miserable."
"Even after the dinner?"
"Especially. Wanna bet on how long til he snaps?"
"Deal."
And after all this time I’m still into you.
I should be over all the butterflies
But i'm into you (I'm in to you)
And baby even on our worst nights
I'm into you (I'm into you)
Let em wonder how we got this far
Cause I don't really need to wonder at all
Yeah after all this time
I'm still into you
Some things just,
Some things just make sense
And one of those is you and I
Some things just,
Some things just make sense
And even after all this time
Tim honestly didn’t think he had it as bad as his brothers. Sure, he watched your every move and had extensive digital libraries on everything about you, but he did that for everyone. He was more rational; a man that clung unto his senses.
No it wasn’t his actions that made him realize how dangerously important you were to him, it was the way he felt doing so.
After an excessively arduous mission, the first thing he does as he gets back home is to open up his devices and get back to work. Surprise surprise, the stress wouldn’t go away. Not even when he stopped to play some games or catch up on Dungeon Meshi’s last episodes. And that always, always made him relax.
Anxious, his hands subconsciously guide him to that one folder.
Click Click
Dozens if not hundreds of holographic photos, videos and even fan art of you surrounded him.
Tim stares at a video he took when he first found out your identity.
Curling up into a ball with a blanket surrounding him, he slowly drifts off to sleep. Your voice lulling him into his overdue journey to dreamland.
Yeah, he was more rational than the rest. Yet, some things just made sense. Like you being the only thing in this world that manages to make his heart race and anxieties run away.
I'm into You
Baby not a day goes by that
I'm not into you
Jon was a bit dense. But even then he could see the signs of his best friend slowly losing himself to love and infatuation.
He would have been happy,
if it weren’t for the fact that he had a crush on you first.
Being the sweetheart he is, he backed off, respectful of Damian’s feelings (even if the latter wasn’t of his).
I should be over all the butterflies
But i'm into you (I'm in to you)
“Woah, you guys are done already?” Jon landed. As soon as he heard that he’d be able to fight alongside you after what felt like years (it was a couple of weeks), he flew all the way from Metropolis in record time.
If he knew what awaited him he probably wouldn’t have left at all.
“Yeah.” You gave him a thumbs up. Your head laid atop Damian’s lap as the domino masked vigilante ran his hands through your hair. His gloves off to his side.
“C-Cool.”
Jon cried himself to sleep that night.
Even after knowing of Damian’s feelings all this time, he could never stop his own.
And baby even on our worst nights
I'm into you (I'm into you)
Let em wonder how we got this far
Cause I don't really need to wonder at all
Yeah after all this time
I'm still into you
I'm still into you
I'm still into you
[ NEXT PART : NOBODY GETS ME ]
#Spotify#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere imagine#yandere fic#yandere oc#yandere oc x reader#yandere core#yandere batfam#yandere scenario#yandere batfamily#batfam#batfamily x reader#batfam x reader#batman x reader#bruce wayne#yandere bruce wayne x reader#yandere dick grayson x reader#yandere jason todd x reader#yandere damian wayne x reader#yandere tim drake x reader#yandere batfam x reader
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instagram j.b.
summary: follow along with joe and his wife evie as they go through his football career.
*face claim yasmin quintana*
series masterlist
evie
liked by joeyb_9, millyg, and 982,028 others
evie: things i do, fits i wear, pics i take. oh.. and a little bday cake.
view all 1,839 comments…
user: not the body armor bottle.. ����
> evie: i do not know that man.
user: happy birthday ev! you are such a bright light.
> evie: 😭💗
millyg: happy birthday my sweet baby angel evangeline. 🤍
> evie: ugh. i miss you mills.
joeyb_9: gotta stay hydrated
> evie: there is only one thing that will quench my thirst.. and it ain’t the drink. 😉
> lahjay10_: not again. get off the internet.
> user: not it being ev getting spicy in the comments this time.
> user: she’s been waiting for this moment.
joeyb_9
liked by lahjay10_, bengals, and 104,837 others
joeyb_9: hbd ev, i love every year of you.
view all 930 comments…
user: happy birthday qween
> evie: omg ur the qween! thank you. 💗
user: an evie post? absolutely not. get rid of it.
> evie: i knew the haters were going to love this one.
lahjay10_: happy birthday ev, lemme see you hit that griddy later yeah?
> evie: you sure you want me stealing your thunder like that?
evie: i love you, you big sap. thank you for celebrating me. 💗
> joeyb_9: you know i celebrate your life everyday, my wifey.
user: happy birthday, this city and joe wouldn’t be the same without you.
> evie: 🥺
user: joe whyyyy did you have to ruin the feed like this?
> lahjay10_: yall need to LAY OFF man.
sam_hubbard_: happy birthday ev! looking forward to celebrating you tonight.
> evie: *virtual hugs*
bengals: happy birthday mrs. burrow, the queen of the jungle!
> evie: i love my bengies so much.
evie
liked by joeyb_9, bengals, and 973,927 others.
evie: # WAG
view all 820 comments…
user: one of the best
> evie: kisses kisses
joeyb_9: the fit was killer today wifey
> evie: thanks hottie. 😘
user: the only WAG i follow. you’re my favorite.
> evie: you guys make my heart feel so full, im sending you love!!
user: how does one become joey b’s bed buddy?
> evie: hmmmm. i wouldn’t know considering i’m his WIFE. get a life and quit being a loser.
> user: i’m a loser? your man BARELY posts you, he doesn’t love you sis.
> evie: if all you have to worry about is wether someone is posting a picture of me on social media then yes, you are in fact a big ass loser.
> user: bro ev you do not play in these comments.
> evie: it gets to a point where the disrespect shouldn’t have to be tolerated. i’ve been in my relationship for over 8 years, and frankly joe or i don’t owe anyone an explanation about how we choose to navigate that publicly.
> lahjay10_: yo you tell em ev. you a little fighter i know you can scrap with all these haters.
> user: what’s even worse is i doubt joe will even acknowledge any of this
> user: he won’t because he’s just using her as a placeholder till something more interesting comes along. he doesn’t care.
> user: yall about to make this girl turn her comments off again.
> millyg: not too much on my girl???? what is happening right now? have you guys forgotten that like.. you don’t know this man?
joeyb_9
liked by bengals, sam_hubbard_, and 347,185 others
joeyb_9: hard fought
view all 1,839 comments…
user: he’s him
user: evie didn’t go to the game today. very unusual.
> user: well you lames were ripping her apart in her comments i wouldn’t want to go either.
user: a running qb
bengals: That guy! 🔥
user: chefs kiss
user: where is ev?
> user: probably in hiding
> user: she was all big talk in the comments and now she’s going to play scared?
> user: she was there, she posted on her story.
> user: you guys really don’t care about mental health do you?
*the comments on this post have been limited*
evie
liked by joeyb_9, millyg, and 921,002 others
evie: hopeless romantics. my jb.
view all 1,630 comments…
user: now she’s just rubbing it in.
> user: it actually makes me sick that they are married and she spoke to his fans the way she did. i hope he leaves her in the dust.
> joeyb_9: those were no fans of mine.
user: this is gross, after everything going on. you’re being petty and childish. posting pictures of your phony relationship.
user: i don’t think joe appreciates yall treating someone he loves like gum on the bottom of your shoe.
joeyb_9: everything is better with you. i would choose you over and over again, every chance i get. you’ll never be a placeholder to me. you’re my favorite place to go and i’d fight the universe if i had to. it’s not fair you have to deal with this because of me.
> evie: thank you for loving me..
millyg: this is so precious i kind of want to throw up.
> lahjay10_: i’m witchu mills.
evies stories:
should i continue making these or are yall bored now?
#joe burrow#nfl#nfl imagine#bengals#cincinnati bengals#joe burrow imagine#joe burrow x reader#joe burrow insta au#joe burrow instagram
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Sit Down Now and Rest
-~-~-~-~-~-~
Description: You had anxiety and depression, and Tony and Bruce were more than happy with getting you anxiety meds the moment that you asked. When you stop taking your meds, your mental health plummets and spirals as well as your physical health, and everyone notices. Don't worry though, they're there for you.
Pairing: (Platonic) Avengers x Teen!Reader
Type: Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort
Warnings: Depression, anxiety, sickness, fainting, dizziness, taking meds(both medicated and just vitamins/iron supplements), dehydration, insomnia, depressive and hurtful thoughts, reader doesn't talk very much in this, nicknames(Kiddo, Kid, Hun)
Word Count: 1,627
Note: I may or may not have written this with too much of myself being present… But it's fine! I also wrote this at like 2 in the morning so it's kinda rough but I just needed to get this typed out so here ya go! Also, the characters might be kinda ooc because I haven't watched any marvel movies in a little while but I've been hyper focused on fics with them lately so yea. And I am working on my tlou and tech fics, it's just hard to find the motivation to write them, but don't worry, I'm working on em.
-~-~-~-~-~-~
You were quick to notice that you stopped taking your meds. You knew that they helped you, but you couldn't get yourself to start the habit of taking them again. You wanted to, most definitely, but you couldn't. Every day was the same. Wake up, look at your meds, contemplate taking them, saying you'll take them later, go train, eat, and then not take them.
You also stopped taking them at night too. You had even set alarms so that you'd remember to take them, but it didn't help at all. Natasha was the first to notice that something was up, being the closest one with you. When she realized that something wasn't quite right, she made sure to keep a close eye on you. She was quick to pick up how dizzy you looked when you'd get up, sometimes not even being able to stay standing before you crumbled back onto the couch. You'd always play it off as if you just lost your footing but she and everyone else knew that that wasn't the case.
One morning you had gotten up much later than you had recently been getting up. When you checked the time, it was around two in the afternoon. You got up and went to the kitchen, feeling extremely hungry after forgetting, and also just not wanting dinner the night prior. When you arrived in the kitchen, Tony was there. He had kind of taken up the father role in your life.
The moment he saw that you had finally arose, he was quick to make a snarky comment in good fun, “Ah! The beast has finally awoken from their slumber, now off they go to find their beauty.”
You only roll your eyes, ignoring him. You felt exhausted, even though you got close to ten hours of sleep seeing as you fell asleep around 4 in the morning. You couldn't find anything easy to fix or that looked appetizing in the fridge or pantry so you just opted for a bottle of water that you would only take a sip or two of then leave with your other five almost full water bottles on your nightstand.
Before you could go back to the confines of your room, Tony had to ask you a question, “ Hey kiddo, did you take your meds?”
The question caught you off guard, not expecting him to ask seeing as he hasn't asked in a real long time.
“Oh yea! I, um, took them earlier but fell back asleep. Yea, that's what I did!”
You try to make it seem like you weren't lying through your teeth, but weren't very successful because of how exhausted you were. However, before Tony could confront you, you book it to your room. You hide there for the rest of the day, not coming out for Dinner. Steve had come by to tell you that dinner was ready but you told him that you weren't very hungry as you just kept your
on the book that you had your nose in. You kept your light on all night, not feeling tired.
The next morning, Nat knocked on your door around eight, coming to get you so that you could train with her. When she opened your door, she saw you laying on your back staring up at the ceiling. You looked exhausted and had dark circles under your eyes. When Bat opened the door, you flung up in surprise. You hadn't heard her knocking so you weren't expecting for the door to randomly open. You couldn't tell who it was at first because your vision went fuzzy black as your body tried to accommodate the sudden movement that you caused. Nat waited for you to acknowledge her.
When you did after a couple seconds, you looked over at the time, confused. It had just been two the last time you looked at the clock. How could it be eight all of the sudden? You were brought out of your thoughts by Natasha trying to talk to you. You zoned back in, giving her a questioning look.
“I said, are you ok? You look exhausted Hun. I came by to get ya to come train but it looks like you need to rest for a couple days.”
“Oh! No, I'm fine. Just give me a couple minutes to get ready and I'll be down and we can get to work in no time!”
She gave you a skeptical look but nodded, closing your door behind her.
When you got down to the training room, Bucky and Steve were there with Natasha. They smiled upon seeing you walk in. However, Bucky and Steve's bright smiles dropped upon looking at your figure. You were slouched, tired eyes not fully open and your eye bags were extremely dark.
Bucky was the first to point it out, “Hey Kid, you ok? You aren't looking too good.”
You only shrugged, your body aching and your throat feeling scratchy and sore for some reason.
As you're sparring with Natasha, you continuously have to stop the match because you go into coughing fits. As finish with your last coughing fit you go back to Natasha, but she's packing her stuff up.
“Wait, where are you going?” You're voice comes rather harsh and rude as you ask the red head.
“I think you should rest for the rest of the day Hun. I'll come check on you in a little while. But go take your meds and also some cough syrup and eat something.”
You didn't say anything as you grabbed your stuff and walked back to your room. This was stupid. It was just a little cold. You can still fight. You need to train. Deep down though you knew you needed to listen to her and do as she said. In the end, you don't. You go back to your room, take a sip or two of water, get a small snack and then sit down in the living room with a book.
You try to read it, but you can't stay focused for long enough to. Your mind is spiraling and racing. You kept replaying how training went. You were so pathetic. And rude. How could you be so rude? Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. You slam the book down onto the sofa, huffing.
You hadn't noticed that some of the others had joined you in the living room. They look up at you, surprised. They weren't used to seeing you like this. You tried to get up quickly, wanting to get away from this embarrassing situation.
The moment you get up, the world goes black, buzzing and ringing is the only thing you can hear as you collapse. You feel something picking you up and setting you down on the couch. You blink your eyes a couple times, slowly feeling sensation being restored in your body. You look around you and see that Bruce is coming over with a damp cloth and water. Nat has your head resting in her lap and Tony has your hand in his. They all look worried as they stare down at you. You hear gasped as Steve and Bucky walk in.
Questions are being thrown at you, too fast for you to comprehend. You instinctively put your hands on your ears, feeling overwhelmed. They all quiet down upon seeing this. Tony is the one to ask the questions from then on.
“Hey, it's ok. We're sorry, didn't mean to overwhelm ya like that. Can ya sit up?”
You nodded, feeling embarrassed now. Tony nodded and Nat helped you sit up, allowing you to lean against her.
“Ok, drink some water, you're ok,” Tony hands you the water that Bruce had brought over as Bruce is wiping your face with the cold damp cloth.
“Ya feeling better?”
“Ya, I'm fine.”
“Have you been taking your meds, kid?”Tony doesn't hold back, knowing what it looks like when you don't take the meds that have been helping you produce what your body needs.
You sheepishly look down at your hands that are fidgeting in your lap. You inhale sharply before shaking your head no.
They all sigh, Natasha being the one to talk this time, “Why haven't you been taking your meds, Hun?”
“I-I just don't want to… I don't like the feeling.”
They looked at each other, wondering what to say. As they look at each other, you go to stand up, but they make sure that you don't get up.
“Sit down now and rest,” Bucky's voice comes from behind you, his hands still on your shoulders.
“I'm sorry…” Your voice comes out in a whisper.
“You're forgiven kiddo, but ya gotta start taking your meds again.” Steve comes over and sits on the other side of you as he speaks.
“I know.”
“How bout I take my medication with ya? God knows that I haven't been taking it as much as I should be,” Tony chuckles as he tries to negotiate with you.
You didn't know if it would actually help you but you were open to the idea.
“Good, drink some more water. Now what do you want to watch? Hm? TV's all yours,” Tony stood up, giving you the TV remote as everyone decided to sit down on the couch.
You picked your comfort movie as you snuggled up with Steve and Nat. Tony had gotten you some actual food, and by the time the movie was over, you had drank all the water, ate all the food, fell asleep, and almost everyone else had fallen asleep as well. You felt safe with the people that cared about you all around you. You knew that this would be a journey, but you also knew that you weren't alone.
-~-~-~-~-~-~
Tag list: @fakegingerrights @macchiato-dreaming22 @silnebula
#the avengers#avengers x reader#avengers x teen!reader#avengers x platonic reader#natasha romanoff#tony stark#steve rogers#bucky barnes#bruce banner#fluff#angst#hurt/comfort#avengers angst#avengers fluff
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HELLO! If you are taking requests can you do a Dazai Osamu! Reader with Alastor, Lucifer and Husk? Both romantic and platonic please. If you are uncomfy with it its perfectly fine!
Hehe! Okay. I actually haven’t gotten Lucifer or Husk yet and I like both of ‘em! I’ve written about this character before, Dazai Osamu but since it’s different, I’ll try it but i am sorry, I can’t manage over six over six-to-seven headcanons for the three boys in both platonic and romantic so just romantic it is! I hope that’s okay!
Alastor
Romantic
Alastor feels like he has to have you on a leash 24/7 and whilst it’s annoying, he wouldn’t mind being near you all the time. You’re a cunning and sophisticated person but you’re also quite suicidal and lazy at times so he has to have a eye on you all the time to ensure he won’t walk into you trying to make a joke, out of stabbing yourself
Alastor is quite protective. You’re a suicidal maniac and you even openly say to him you want to properly die with him, die with a handsome man and he is repulsed by this idea so he has to always cling you onto him to control your very bad habits and bad mannerisms. He will get you over them eventually, as your boyfriend, he cares about your health and he is thankful that you reciprocate
Alastor is glad when you’re more into your funny, caring state. When you’re more of an approachable and good person. Because then, it’s a golden opportunity to bond with you and not act as your damn suicide prevention police. He much prefers when you’re not fantasising and being picky about how you get erased then fail to complete these processes
Alastor’s quite impressed by your skills. You’re the strongest and youngest mafia leader back in your human life and your current sinner life so you have the passion you act you don’t and you’re more mature then you behave as. He is proud when he can watch you take charge and lead around the Hotel with your own knowledgeable being the main guide
Lucifer Morningstar
Romantic
Lucifer is a goofy sweetheart so you bet your ass that he is very good at keeping you passive and giggling, away from your dark mind. You’re always smiling and joking around with the King of Hell since he can handle you very well. He is as caring but he treats you like you’re made of glass. Something he won’t stop doing until your obsession over suicide dies out
Lucifer likes how mysterious you can be. You’re not entirely open, which he understands whilst being immensely open himself. He will just have to win your trust and your ability to express yourself over time as your new partner. You’re dark and enigmatic, if not the opposite of Lucifer and it’s a wonder why he likes you so much and he could write a book about why he likes you
Lucifer loves how committed and willing you are. You’ll do even the most shady things for him and he always feels both extreme pride and the extreme desire to scoop you up in his mighty six wings to kiss your face off. You’re so loyal and you do so much for him, it’s not a surprise that he sticks to you like he’s glued onto your hip
Lucifer is actually quite protective to you. He doesn’t want you touching even the smallest weapon, even if you’re an adult as well but because of your mental issues and how suicide trigger-happy you are. At least, you do have a good sense of humour and have a fun-loving side through how much you tease people, it’s adorable! Lucifer does like them, it, for some reason, soothes him hearing you play around more genuinely
Husk
Romantic
Husk is a grumpy, quiet but yet patient and considerate man. He may be older but he is still caring and makes a wonderful partner. Especially for this carefree and relaxed soul, one who expresses their suicidal tendencies quite a lot. Husk knows about your suicidal desires and for that, he has such a sharp’s tiger eye on you
Husk(in reality, of these three boys) is the most healthy to date. He is gruff and emotionless on the outside but compassionate and gentle on the inside, he is a Tsundere at best and he doesn’t mind being stern with you when you’re falling down a rabbit hole or trying to harm yourself like it’s some comedy show. You’re life is beautiful and you need to see that
Husk relates to you a lot, on deep levels. You’re both lonely, you’re both lazy, you’re both basically done with everything but you have each other, you both hide your real selves and your genuine personality under a armour of behaviours, so Husk acts as the proper one for you two. He tries to encourage you to join him whenever-wherever and to try put your wits and intellect to good use. He’d feel so proud of you if you did
Husk always sticks around you. He never leaves you alone, he doesn’t want you hurt so he takes you to bed with him, he cuddles you to his side whenever you’re both walking, he even comes into the bathroom with you. He does it for many reasons, mainly because he feels so comfortable with you
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel crush#hazbin headcanons#hazbin hotel imagines#hazbin hotel headcanons#hazbin hotel characters#vivziepop hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin lucifer#hazbin hotel lucifer#hazbin husk#hazbin hotel husk#romantic alastor#romantic lucifer#romantic husk#alastor headcanons#lucifer headcanons#husk headcanons#alastor x reader#lucifer x reader#husk x reader#alastor#lucifer#husk#romantic headcanons#romantic fanfic#hazbin comfort#comfort headcanons#fluff imagines
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"girls with daddy issues are so hot!"
Don't seek out women who are clearly struggling just so you can fulfil your fetish.
Men will categorise certain mental illnesses as "hot" but only when they come with the "quirky" aspects.
For example, cluster b personality disorders are seen as "hot" due to their symptoms (like what men perceive to be clinginess), DID and OSDD are seen as "hot" because of the chance of having "freaky" alters. Depression is seen as "desirable" because men have saviour complexes and want to "fix" women with it. Anxiety is seen as "hot" because having your girlfriend being shy about being around your friends is "cute".
In a few weeks that girl with cluster b disorders will be called "narcissistic" and "crazy" for exhibiting symptoms of her mental illness. That girl with DID/OSDD will be called "boring" and" weird" due to them not finding any freaky alters, but just normal ones. That girl with depression will be called "Lazy" and "disgusting" the second her depression gets worse and she starts neglecting her physical hygiene. That girl with anxiety will be called "A basket case" and an" attention seeker" for having a panic attack at a social event and causes strangers to stop and stare.
Men just want vulnerable women who they can coerce into doing certain things, but when their vulnerability comes with their own issues then they don't want em no more.
So when that girl with daddy issues isn't secretly some kink addict and is instead a girl who has mental health issues and potential trauma from other men, don't say you didn't know what you were gonna get. You were chasing a rainbow and now you're getting mad that there was rain and it wasn't entirely sunny.
This is why I hate men.
#girlblogging#girlblogger#hyper feminine#just girly posts#just girly thoughts#this is what makes us girls#coquette#lana del rey#pink aesthetic#manic pixie dream girl#female rage#female hysteria#angry feminist#feminism#mental illness#yes all men#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#dollette
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Pedro Pascal Character Fic Recs | Vol 43
AO3 | Kofi | Main Masterlist | The Spreadsheet Masterlist
Hello Friends!
Welcome to the 43rd installment of the Spreadsheet Digest! I did a lot of reading this week and I'm very excited to share it with y'all. All summaries and tags are provided by the author, unless they weren't - then I filled them in.
Want to be on the digest? Tag me in your work and I'll do my best to read it <3
Let Them See - Dave one shot by @sizzlingcloudmentality
he gets you off in front of the other guys
explicit, smut, no use of y/n, reader is ablebodied, d/s dynamics (duh), voyeurism, exhibitionism, very affectionate degradation (it's Dave, of course he calls you a slut), female masturbation, male masturbation, unprotected p in v, very affectionate possessive talk, creampie, petnames (baby), choking
This is so hot... Like... SO hot
Let Them Feel - Dave one shot by @guiltyasdave
(author's note) yesterday the lovely em @/luxurychristmaspudding posted this poll with the compelling question in a room full of p boys, who is getting you off (in front of everyone else 👀)?, which led to the lovely daphne @/sizzlingcloudmentality posting let them see (go read that asap!), which then led to me asking "hey do you mind if i continue this?" and then writing 2k words in a state that i can only describe as possessed
explicit smut (-> 18+ only!), able-bodied reader, reader has hair that can be grabbed, no use of y/n, dom!dave, exhibitionism, lowkey group sex tbh, rough oral sex (m receiving), fingering, degradation kink, praise kink
After reading Let Them See, I was dying for more because it was so good and then the lovely Jana gave me more and it was everything.
Eros and Psyche - Dieter series by @schnarfer
Dieter is a modern day Greek God Eros. We’re going full existential dread rom-com, actually.
Vaguely inspired by the Greek myth of Eros & Psyche, soul mates, yearning, emotional torment, drugs and alcohol references, lots of swears, slow burn, discussions of death and mental health, eventual smut. Dieter is a walking red flag. Reader is named (Psyche) but physical descriptions are minimal. Time is meaningless but also always marching on. Lots of Dieter POV. Fleabag coded.
this fic... I adore the soulmates trope as sort of a guilty pleasure, but this was beyond anything I've ever read within that trope. It's sweet, a bit sad at times, and just perfect in every way. The descriptions, the characters, the everything. Despite my rambling I feel like I'm speechless because I can't quite articulate why I think this fic is perfect. Just trust me.
Do it Like Madonna - Dieter one shot by @covetyou
Being Dieter Bravo's plus one to a party isn't always all it's cracked up to be, and sometimes, just sometimes, it puts a smile on your face anyway.
no smut. nudity. mention of Dieter Bravo's dick and balls. drug and alcohol use/refrence, improper use of party hats. cameos from Javi G, Oberyn, and Santos (all the P-Boys are there!) gn!reader
This is so fucking funny and so quintessentially Dieter. Perfection
Bloodlust - Din series by @dindjarindiaries
A daring favor from Boba Fett sends you and your long-time business partner, Din Djarin, undercover together—as a married couple.
fake marriage, fluff & angst, hurt/comfort, eventual/mild smut, sexual references, injuries & blood, canon-typical violence
this fic was adorable, and the plot was so interesting. I love their love ugh. It's just so cute and earnest and everything I needed.
Waiting Game - Din/Ez one shot by @northernbluess
din quite literally crashed into your life when you least expected it. injured and seriously stubborn, you took him in and as you tenderly nursed him to health, your bond grew in quiet shared moments. the day came when he was recovered enough to leave you, except he never did. now, you find yourself in a similar predicament, taking in another wearied stranger just as you had with din. he ensnares you, pulling you into his orbit, with his silver tongue, stolen touches, and hungry eyes—but what happens when you find out that he has seemingly charmed din too?
threesome, m/m/f, voyeur ezra, possessive din, oral (m and f receiving), unprotected PIV sex, unprotected anal sex, double penetration, fingering, slight dom!din, ezra is a bit of a creep at first, major canon divergence (no grogu, no cee, ezra still has his arm, etc.), choking/breathplay, biting, squirting, one (1) slap, lots of tension, panties(?), mutual pining, probably OOC, pure filth tbh. no use of y/n.
I am unhinged about this. DinEz is my favorite ship and I adore MMF threesome fics with them. This was breathtakingly good.
Thy Kingdom Cum - Ezra one shot by @absurdthirst and @storiesofthefandomlovers
The new priest's arrival to your parish has you doubting your commitment to God.
Blasphemy, inaccuracies with nuns/religious inaccuracies, religious guilt, lust, desire, demonic possession, dark intentions, sexual corruption, loss of innocence, virgin reader, oral sex (male and female receiving), vaginal sex, unprotected sex, dirty talk, derogatory language, sex in a confessional, cock riding, pregnancy, mentions of prophesy, end of times, unnatural childbirth, death
Always love a good demon!Ezra, and I loved the steep fall into corruption little bird went through ugh. This was so good. The innocence of reader and the depravity of Ez was such a good contrast. I love this
Sit Back, Baby - Frankie one shot by @almostfoxglove
You've got a crush on your neighbor across the hall and finally get the chance to show him you care.
Smut (m!oral), pwp, drinking (not during smut), sorta sub!Frankie.soft,
subby frankie is forever one of my favorites. I just wanna take care of him dammit. Can't resist a good blowjob fic either. All around wonderful in every way.
Bad Idea - Javi P one shot by @murder-wife
A lil quickie on the couch never hurt anyone
fingering, unprotected PIV, panty sniffing, couch sex, the sex blanket makes an appearance! *LEAVING SOME THINGS UNTAGGED TO AVOID SPOILERS* proceed with caution, nothing dark, everyone is of age and constenting
I love everything about this. The whole premise is perfect. The plot twist??? to die for, truly.
You Can Be My Daddy - Javi P one shot by @thesummerpetrichor
Your soon to be husband leaves you at the altar, but you should have guessed since the practice seemed to run in the family. It’s hard to be upset however, when his father comes to repent for not only his own but his son’s wrong doings. Aka fiancé’s dad Javi fucking you in your wedding dress after his son ditches you at the altar.
Minimal editing, unspecified but thicc and legal age gap, infidelity, daddy kink, heavy breeding kink, insane dirty talk, toxic father son relationship, reader is delulu, praise kink, petnames, sex in front of a mirror, veil pulling??, a few spanks, creampie, Javi fucks you into the mattress, unprotected P in V [don’t do it!!].
Getting left at the altar sucks, but getting fucked into the mattress by your would-be father-in-law makes it alllll better. God damn this was hot
A Litany of Lethe - Javi P one shot by @kiwisbell
Working on his father’s ranch, Javier Peña tries to leave Colombia behind. The new housekeeper reminds him how much he enjoys a challenge.
post-narcos s3 canon, slow burn, catch the much ado references and i’ll give u a cookie, second chance, enemies to lovers, i take liberties with some geography, javi suffers from foot-in-the-mouth syndrome, angsty javier, angsty reader, angsty everything, bickering, tension of all varieties, emotional constipation from both parties, chucho being wingman no. 1, discussions of past sexual relationships, mentions of domestic abuse (not against reader), implied child neglect/abuse, grovelling king javier peña, we call him grovi, implied age gap, it's been 10 years since javi left for colombia bc i said so, reader has hair, javi is a munch, oral sex (f receiving), grinding, bickering during sex, javi is not a brat tamer but he is a brat handler (thank u mya), unprotected PIV, creampie, dirty talk, fingering, pussy pronouns, lots of biting, javi vampire confirmed??
This reads like literature or poetry or some shit. I loved Javi's internal monologue so much. I loved getting inside his head like that. The smut is so worth the wait too ugh. I love a long ass one shot <3
Touch Tank - Javi P one shot by @thundermartini
Javier helps you get over a little self-confidence crisis.
it’s self indulgent porn with plot guys. smut, kissing, oral sex - f! receiving + m! receiving, shower sex, mention of piv sex, allusion to vaginal fingering, established relationship, domestic fluff, pet names, soft!javi, blue shirt javi (but picture any javi you want), a lot of feelings again, reader has hair, insecure reader (mentions of her not fitting in the lingerie she chose as she would love to but no further descriptions so you can imagine whatever you want).
Obsessed with Javi being into lingerie, first of all. I blame @iamskyereads Lie to Me for that. Secondly, this was so hot and sweet. I love how they make each other feel better. So fucking cuuuuute
Me on You - Joel one shot by @luxurychristmaspudding
after a night out dancing and a lift home turns into something more, you learn something about your dad's buddy.
it's smut, y'all. everything you've come to expect. respectable age gap (10 years ish), tiny bit of spanking, one (1) gentle pussy slap, lil bit of daddy kink, joel miller eats it from the back (oral (f&m)), edging, unprotected piv (do better), creampie, feelings, joel miller's whore mouth.
Joel Miller fucks and it is so unbearably hot
Lost in the Darkness - Joel one shot by softlybarnes (AO3)
Joel wants you. The only problem is you're the on the arm of one of his partners.
Angst, Abuse, Abusive Relationships (not between reader/joel), Smut, Biting, Insecurity, Self-Worth Issues, Protective Joel (The Last of Us), Anxiety, Dissociation, Canon-Typical Violence, Torture, Blood and Injury, Past Sexual Assault, Character Death
Ohhhh I love this. The way they're both fucking feral ugh. It's so good.
There's a Place and Time - Joel one shot by @penvisions
Moving back to your parents house wasn't part of the plan, neither was being a thorn in your neighbor's side. but you roll with the punches, and hey, he's kinda cute when he gets huffy.
age gap (joel is mid 30's / reader is mid 20's), angst, biting words, argumentative language, joel is a lil meanie but so is reader, grief, off-screen loss, depictions of depression, comfort, mushy stuff
Joel has foot in mouth disease lmaooo. I liked the depiction of grief in this a lot. Very sweet fic with some excellent banter and even better softness.
So Much to Lose - Joel series by @auteurdelabre
Newly settled into Jackson city and forced to go on patrols with the miserable Joel Miller sets off a chain of events and encounters that have you questioning everything, including your own heart.
Enemies to Lovers, Ellie & Joel Bonding (The Last of Us), Protective Joel (The Last of Us), Parent Joel (The Last of Us), Joel is Bad at Feelings (The Last of Us), Joel Needs a Hug (The Last of Us), Joel Lives (The Last of Us), Hurt Joel (The Last of Us), Joel Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (The Last of Us), Dom/sub Undertones, Dirty Talk, Dirty Thoughts, Eventual Happy Ending, Shameless Smut, Smut, Gratuitous Smut, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Fingerfucking, Vaginal Fingering, Oral Sex, Rough Oral Sex, Reader-Insert, Face-Fucking, Lesbian Ellie (The Last of Us), Drama & Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, Outdoor Sex, Forced Bonding, Cooking, Guitars, Love Confessions, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Trauma
The thing I really love about this fic is the way the side characters are integrated and just as important as reader and Joel. Jennifer, Luke, Ellie, Maria -- they're all important. I also love the slow transition from mean!Joel to soft!Joel, the way it isn't exactly linear, and the motivations behind his behavior. It's so rewarding to watch him open up over time UGH. So Good.
Scarlet Haze - Joel series by @katiexpunk
Life in the QZ was fairly predictable. That was, until Joel Miller showed up on your doorstep covered in blood. Since then, you've helped him more times than you can count. Now it's his turn to return the favor.
SEX POLLEN. SEX POLLEN. SEX POLLEN. Set in the TLOU universe in the Boston QZ. Buckle the fuck up for a lot of filthy, feral smut. Check chapter warnings for specifics.
GOD I love sex pollen fics. so so much. This series is unfinished but you get smut in part two and it's entirely worth it. So fucking good.
I Know You By Heart - Joel/Ezra series by @sixhours
Joel and Ellie settle into their new lives in Jackson but it's not the easiest transition. Thankfully Jackson has a counselor to help with that.
Joel is bad at feelings and relationships, Ellie is a little shit (affectionate), canon-compliant with season 1, SMUT, gay sex, anal sex, anal fingering, blowjobs, bisexual!Joel, period-typical homophobia, light angst, angst with a happy ending, romance, alcoholic behavior, age gap (~10ish years so barely a thing)
Obsessed with this pairing. Ezra and Cee in Jackson?? I love it so much. The smut is so good... Like... SO GOOD. I love me some gay pedro boys and I love gay dads in love. HMU for more gay dads in love fics, bc I have a couple recs.
Fortnight - Lucien one shot by @pedgito
it was never a favor, allowing him to take up space in your apartment. but, time after time, he finds his way back and somehow, it brings an unexpected normalcy to your life.
the uninvited spoilers, set post-movie, roommates to lovers, enemies to lovers, reader works in the film industry, financial hardship, shitty living situations, lucien is a schmooze and a drunk, but also a sweetheart, angst, feelings, reader has shit luck with dating, there's also smut in here somewhere i swear (oral, couch sex, unprotected piv, all the good stuff)
Oh Lucien the pathetically sexy man that you are. This was everything I wanted it to be and more.
Prima Nocta - Marcus Acacius one shot by @fuckyeahdindjarin
Tomorrow, you will marry your husband-to-be. But tonight - it belongs to his father.
DUB CON only due to nature of prima nocta, both parties enthusiastically consent, twist on prima nocta, unspecified age gap, loss of virginity, dirty talk, oral sex (F receiving), fingering, dry humping, unprotected sex, unrealistic descriptions of first sexual experience, all manners of historical inaccuracies and linguistic anachronisms sorry not sorry, ignores the events of the movie so you can consider this an AU, Marcus is widowed and has a son, shall we call this bfd: Ancient Rome version lmao
This is the first Marcus Acacius fic I've read and it was fucking incredible. Def will be reading more of him from now on. UGHGHGGH this was so hot.
Cosmic Love - Marcus Acacius/Marcus Pike one shot by @kedsandtubesocks
a missing statue, a handsome ancient roman general, an equally handsome museum visitor - and you caught in the magical (and wonderful) mess of it all
MAJOR GLADIATOR 2 SPOILERS. time travel AU, magic elements, pining & yearning, fluff but with touches of angst, implied age gap (Acacius being older than both reader & Marcus), light use of gendered language, bi!Marcus Acacius & bi!Marcus Pike, brief mention of death & existential questioning, spicy themes, smut (threesome, m!oral, one moment of spitting) M/M/F & M/M dynamics, polyamorous exploration that leads to eventual poly relationship, no use of y/n
I love a time travel AU, it reminds me of Kate and Leopold. This fic was so cute, had just the right touch of angst, and was so hot UGH. I loved how sweet Acacius was and how down bad Pike was and just... everything really
Strawberry Sugar - Oberyn one shot by @guiltyasdave
Your boyfriend spoils you on your birthday morning. In some... unexpected ways.
explicit smut (-> 18+ only!), able-bodied reader, no use of y/n, food play, dirty talk, oral sex (f receiving), ridiculous amounts of fluff
Delicious, filthy, fluffy, just wonderful, really.
Happy Reading!
#fic recs#the spreadsheet digest#fanfiction recommendations#pedro pascal#pedro pascal character fanfiction#ppcu fanfiction#pedro pascal fanfiction
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Saitama and depression; how OPM explores mental health
(TW: Depression, Suicide)
Many readers have more than likely noticed that Saitama seems like a pretty depressed individual, however it is never directly stated besides the above Saitama introspection where he acknowledges it and promptly puts it out of his mind.
This topic came to my mind after seeing this particular video about 8 oddly specific symptoms of depression by Dr. Scott Eilers that are not often talked about. We're going to talk about them and then some. Take note that I'm not a doctor or mental health specialist, I'm just writing meta so that's my disclaimer. :p
We'll start from the beginning and with the heaviest topic of em all related to depression and see how One Punch Man explores this particular mental health issue and move on from there.
Warning, long post ahead.
The most obvious sign of major depression is well, suicidal thoughts and suicidal ideation that Saitama exhibits as early as chapter 2. He never denies wanting to die by Crablante's hand.
Saitama also heavily relates to the guy who wanted to jump from rooftop while he was eating sushi and bluntly talks to him to pull himself up his bootstraps essentially as he did on his own, interpreting that sounding fake and sweetalking would not get through to the guy. (Salmon, Vol 7 extra)
Other signs pointing towards depression would be low energy, lack of motivation, self-isolation, hobbies that are low-energy consuming but stimulating like gaming, manga, watching tv and such, all of which Saitama exhibits... but another common depression symptom is Anhedonia.
"A diverse array of deficits in hedonic function, including reduced motivation or ability to experience pleasure, particularly from previously enjoyable activities."
The doctor in the video describes Achievement anesthesia by the inability to feel positive emotions from achievements. Despite Saitama saving plenty people, he only feels a lack of accomplishment and probably frustration from feelings of uselessness. He used to take joy and satisfaction from helping people out in the past (Brushing up, vol2 extra), but the same and even vastly stronger merits now only serve to highlight how little he feels about them now.
A great contrast.
What was once a great victory, is now just yet another tuesday for Saitama. (One of my fave panels)
Even worse, he does not get brownie points for being a good, upstanding citizen. He gets no money and rarely appreciation for the good he does and that just accumulates his depression when his neighborhood emptied. And with his power, he also gets to clean up the mess because he has the power and it's the right thing to do, be it from picking up litter to saving little kids from getting kidnapped (What can't Be Bought, Vol 5 Extra). But such also breeds jealousy when everyone else reap the rewards, reap the fame and the fans and the good reputation.
The stress of trying to be a good person with moral integrity in a bad world is a heavy load, which can lead to depression, lack of motivation and things like compassion fatigue. The more he tries to find something worthy of doing, the more he invests in it, the more he keeps getting disappointed by the lackluster feeling and reception he gets.
Saitama beats himself up for moral failures, which is a contributing factor for his depression, such as when he was in the tournament and monsters were running amok, despite not having no prior knowledge of monsters around the area. The complete lack of explicit improvement on things he wants to do however, is the most sore point. He didn't learn a thing in the tournament and just felt like he was wasting time, conditioning him to think that self-improvement is just a waste of time on itself because he won't learn anything anyway.
Being good at something naturally makes one feel better about themselves and Saitama's low self-esteem and for instance, lack of skill in gaming, creates friction and Angry perfectionism. One especially doesn't want their few fun hobbies to feel like hollow endeavours. Being competitive, one would want to git gud and accomplish growth and getting constantly trashed by one finger keeps driving it home that Saitama is not actually good at this thing either, something that he wants to enjoy doing. Saitama also constantly projects his bad mood and this insecurity by trying to trash talk King, without much success. King is such a good friend though that fortunately the does not seem to mind Saitama getting pissed at being a sore loser. True pro gamer bro.
Lets pray Saitama never finds that mmorpg's have hardcore raids, he would never be able to leave the house again. 😂
-*-
Which brings us to the last point in the video, Addiction to emotion-creating activities.
If Saitama was any less strong willed and less restrained and if he actually had money to spare, he would 100% develop a gambling addiction. Keep this man far, far away from social media too.
However, as soon as something...or someone...breaks through that fugue and creates actual emotion, one can develop an addiction to the thing because our brains want/need that dopamine fix.
Genos just so happened to barge into his very lonely life life and became that someone to create that emotional connection with and Genos provides too when he's taken over cleaning and majority of the cooking and even finances, something that people with depression struggle to accomplish. When Saitama cooks, it's usually not very difficult dish to prepare either, chop ingredients and toss them into the pan. Saitama also loves food and needs money to feel like he's financially secure, being unemployed, and has little social contacts, so it's like triple-dipping in the dopamine sauce. Nomnom, feelsgoodman.
It's all well and good until shit gets real and your main source of feel-good emotional connection just dies. Oh and it's your fault too cuz you played around. Good job Saitama. That's a deadly amount of guilt and a PTSD as a cherry on top.
Genos' continued existence is essentially applying bandaid to a bleeding head wound that's Saitama's mental health issues.
Ultimately, I do wonder if ripping off the bandaid is why Saitama wants to get back his private space away from Genos, because he subconsciously understands it's not very healthy to be so emotionally dependant and Genos is just as obsessed about him. The allure of social contact and benefits are great, but so too are the detrimental effects, among them complete lack of privacy which is a nightmare for a private introvert like Saitama.
(Yes yes, it's still pretty dang funny, but it's still invasion of privacy)
-*-
Last example of Saitama's depression I want to touch, thanks to @gofancyninjaworld for the input, is Saitama's forgetfulness, a memory disruption if you will.
"Depressed individuals typically show poor memory for positive events, potentiated memory for negative events, and impaired recollection."
It is a running joke that Saitama has difficulty recalling names, which may be entirely normal because he does not really care to remember names for people he's improbable to meet later and emotional connection and repetition helps us memorize things better (such as Genos having to repeat his name upon introduction), however Saitama has also showcased potentially impaired recollection for events that happened just moments prior.
(Again, a great contrast. Show, don't tell, where one shows obvious signs of depression and another...not so obvious, in the same panel, in a humorous way to boot. Masterful way of tackling heavy topics, in my humble opinion.)
Genos worries for his memory in the Majin drama cd 1 and often tries to accomodate for his lapses of memory too, be it long ultimate attack name phrase, marking special sales or whatnot. Saitama forgetting to take out trash and forgetting names is normal, but it may be exacerbated by his depression.
The more telling part is probably the fact that even when his memory is jogged, he still does not remember Flash's name. It's like he never registered the name in the first place, maybe he did not bother because he thought it wasn't important but it does not appear he's trolling here and legitimately does not remember. Though he does remember the nickname he gave for Flash instead, which is funny. He made it up on the spot and it's hilarious, so it stuck.
The less emotional connection one has to things, the less likely we are to remember those things, such as the monsters Saitama kills are blurred together because he feels no self-satisfaction from killing said monsters and protecting people.
In the sense that memory block can also be a trauma response, ONE makes Saitama's complete lack of recall of the ominous future a running joke in classic ONE fashion. It's either that or time shenanigans. Or both, both is good.
Last but not least, Saitama also shows that he recalls little to no appreciation from helping people, despite the rare occasion where he receives gratitude from directly intervening and he definitely remembers the more negative events better, such as when he complained about going unnoticed and not having fans. (Hobby and work, cpt 15). He can recite the story to Genos when asked but there does not seem to be instance where he mentions such without prompted.
All is not lost in the memory department however, since Saitama shows a potential memory recall improvement in the recent retconnect chapter Tenninto where he recognises the martial art dudes from the tournament he was in. It might be nothing, as it was retconned too but ONE is definitely keeping it in mind.
It is quite fitting thought that the video talks about how "normal people look like superheroes" because they have the energy and motivation to do daily tasks and OPM is a superhero manga about a person who's the strongest hero but he barely considers himself a hero. ONE has also said in an interview that just living a "normal life" is hard and OPM definitely reflects that sentiment.
-*-
Saitama is slowly getting there though. He seems happier, more confident, more outgoing and a larger array of emotional displays, to the point that some people in the fandom have voiced their complaints about the apathetic hero apparently smiling too often. To that I say, character progression is a thing and a good thing at that.
Saitama even has better gait when he used to slouch and drag his feet that bespeaks of his increasing self-confidence. Less self-doubts + more confidence = more gains.
He was also able to calm down despite losing heavily to King in a fighting game and still feeling very irritated after the fact, but offered his blunt advice to lift weights anyway, which would indicate better emotional regulation. His attention span has also seemingly improved, despite the Knight yapping away for an entire panel. (Worlds I know nothing about, cpt 193). Then even when the entire thing of releasing an epic monster was just as boring monster encounter as the rest of them, he seemingly took it as a learning experience of expanding his world-view instead of complaining his utter boredom. He also recalls the tiny tidbit about Flash's utter lack of finding his way in the underground maze and remembers Blast, his name and thanks him for getting them out of the underground hole.
(Mathing is hard though but this may also be a 4th wall breaking meme because we've never seen Saitama defeat sonic 14 times on screen. Are we being gaslit? lmao)
-*-
Closing thoughts, we've not seen the last of Saitama's mental health journey, far from it. Nor have we adressed that legitimate concern of PTSD in the background and I'm sure it will pop up at some point or another...too much of an opportunity for ONE to just ignore in this master thesis of a manga about issues he feels are important.
Anyways, thank you all for reading this far, it's been a while. :D
#opm#one punch man#saitama#genos#opm king#opm meta#flashy flash#tw suicide#tw depression#mental health#opm manga panels#my own work#long#character analysis#character study
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