#med student crisis

[lovesickdipshit]

now that im in uni my url feels inaccurate cuz i simply Do Not have the time to be love-sick or a dipshit right now

[wobubling]

Grown up young justice girls yet again...

Written out text under the cut:

Greta Hayes - Secret

After being brought back to life by Darkseid, she discovered that she has the ability to separate her spirit from her body

Cassandra "Cassie" Sandsmark

She's pretty sure that she's outgrown "Wonder Girl", but she's not sure who to be next, and has been spending a lot of time training on Themiscyra to try to figure herself out. At least she's got this sick sword now.

Buzzed her hair during an identity crisis

Anita Fite - Empress

She took a short leave of absence from the whole hero business to take care of her parents, but now they're a bit older and have been officially adopted by Maad, she's back, and better than ever.

She does roller derby with Cissie in her free time

Cissie King-Jones - Med Student (and part time babysitter to Anita's parents)

Traya Sutton - Mechanical Engineer, guy in the chair, and part time babysitter.

[girlactionfigure]

“I feel I no longer belong in 🇨🇦 and may need to flee.”

A new survey from the Jewish Medical Association of Ontario reveals a devastating rise in antisemitism targeting Jewish doctors and healthcare workers. The data is shocking, and the consequences could be catastrophic.

🧵:

2/ Since October 7, antisemitism in healthcare settings has skyrocketed:

•29% of Jewish medical professionals report it in their communities.

•39% in hospitals.

•43% in academic settings.

Before October 7, only 1% reported severe antisemitism. 

3/ The survey found 31% of Jewish doctors in Ontario are considering leaving the country.

Doctors are being forced out by a hostile environment where their Jewish identity makes them targets.

This isn’t just a Jewish issue—it’s a healthcare crisis. 

4/ The survey of over 1,000 Jewish healthcare professionals across Canada reveals staggering numbers:

•73% of Jewish doctors in Ontario report antisemitism in academic spaces.

•60% in hospitals.

•Over 80% face antisemitism at work overall. 

5/ The most common sources of antisemitism?

•Organizational policies (57%)

•Organizational communications (55%)

•Colleagues (53%)

This isn’t random—it’s systemic, embedded in the very institutions meant to support them. 

6/ Doctors shared heartbreaking stories:

“I fear my colleagues’ reaction to my name and identity. I feel I can no longer admit who I am.”

Another said:

“I feel I no longer belong in Canada.”

This is the daily reality for Jewish healthcare professionals. 

7/ Dr. Ayelet Kuper, Chair of the Jewish Medical Association of Ontario, warned:

“This is a crisis for all people in Ontario, not just Jewish doctors. If we don’t address this, we risk losing a generation of physicians, educators, and researchers.” 

8/ Even unions are failing Jewish healthcare workers. One occupational therapist said:

“Union members attend protests condoning terrorism, chanting dangerous slogans, and making my workplace unsafe.”

The environment for Jewish professionals is hostile and dangerous. 

9/ As Dr. Sam Silver said:

“I work with students navigating a hostile environment where their identity as Jews makes them targets of hate. This cannot continue.”

Antisemitism is pushing doctors out of Ontario, and the healthcare system will pay the price. 

10/ The survey is clear: antisemitism in healthcare impacts patient care, erodes workplace integrity, and threatens the entire system.

Jewish doctors are being targeted, but the consequences will affect every Canadian.

11/ This is a crisis that cannot be ignored. We must demand accountability from institutions, protect Jewish healthcare workers, and fight antisemitism at every level.

Antisemitism has no place in Canada—or anywhere. 

Full story:

Jewish doctors consider fleeing Canada amid rising rates of antisemitism in their profession

'Union members have been attending protests that condone terrorism, and I’ve witnessed colleagues showing up to these protests with union flags, chanting dangerous slogans'

LINK

Antisemitism in Canadian med schools, hospitals skyrocketed after Oct. 7 attacks: JMAO

In a survey conducted by the Jewish Medical Association of Ontario, 80% of Jewish physicians said they face antisemitism at work

LINK

@Joe_Roberts01

[rottenpumpkin13]

i would love to see your interpretations of the very few times Zack and Genesis actually get along

Canon: I already spoke a little bit about it in this post, but I have so many thoughts about them, primarily about how there's no doubt in my mind that they would've gotten along had Crisis Core not happened, had the events that branded them as the hero and villain never occurred, and I back it up by the faith Zack had in Genesis even as he was trying to stop him. Zack even wanted to save him in the end 🙃

Headcanon: Zack and Genesis combine their part ADHD, part drama kid, 100% chaotic energy brains and the universe braces itself for maximum pandemonium. This is why Angeal was relieved when Genesis took one look at his student and declared him a nuisance. And then they started getting along. And now Angeal takes anti-anxiety meds because they have:

• The "Oh, That's What That Does" incident: Angeal was away, Genesis was put in charge of Zack's training. He decided it was time Zack learned to master dual materia casting. Zack's "can we combine Fire and Blizzard materia?" Turned into Genesis' "I don't see why not" which turned into Lazard's "HOW THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A HOLE THROUGH THE FLOOR? LOOK! LOOK, THERE'S TSENG. SAY HI TO TSENG. OH LOOK, NOW TSENG IS HAVING A HEART ATTACK. FANTASTIC."

• Zack gets homesick a lot. His mom used to read to him when he was sad. Genesis loves reading to other people. It works out <3

• Pranked Angeal and Sephiroth by switching their swords at the last minute before their assignments. Angeal was afflicted and distressed, because the Buster Sword was no longer in his peripheral vision. Sephiroth not so much, because he's a firm believer that any sword can get the job done+ he can later summon Masamune anyway. The problem is Sephiroth uses his sword for everything, so when the Buster Sword came back with a scratch, Angeal tried to kill Sephiroth. This is how Genesis and Zack ended up in a joint disciplinary hearing. They took a selfie, posted it on social media and everything.

[soobnny]

SKZ MASTERLIST (☆ — my personal favorites)

✰ kim seungmin

eighteen ☆

⇀ best friends to lovers, college au, slow burn (19.8k words)

it takes you a while to realize being known is being loved, and kim seungmin just so happens to be an expert in the study of you

the things we define as love ☆

⇀ strangers to lovers, college au (2.4k words)

a study of love through the lens of a tired photography student who has long given up on romance

i hate that man

⇀ enemies to lovers, college au (5.5k words)

the four times you think you hate seungmin, and the one time you realize that might’ve not been true after all

one in the morning ☆

⇀ roommates to lovers, reader is sick (1.0k words)

roommate seungmin takes care of you when you catch a cold

halfway through summer ☆

⇀ best friends to lovers, fluff, can happen in the universe of “eighteen” (1.0k words)

that one time kim seungmin almost confesses

end of the day

⇀ established relationship, comfort, slice of life (0.8k words)

med student comes home to law student seungmin after a long, tiring shift

pandora’s box ☆

⇀ enemies to lovers, hanahaki au, school au (14.0k words)

seungmin chances you on the day you accidentally puke petals in the men’s bathroom. who would’ve thought this one encounter would lead sworn enemy to help you get your longtime crush’s attention?

cops and robbers

⇀ fuckboy seungmin, college au (3.8k words)

fuckboy kim seungmin takes interest in the quiet, photography major who lives just across his dorm

no other heart

⇀ best friends to lovers, college au (1.4k words)

there is only one person that can get seungmin to do absolutely anything (spoiler alert: you)

ten things kim seungmin says when he thinks you’re asleep ☆ ⇀ established relationship, fluff, a sprinkle of angst

ex!seungmin thinking of u when he graduates ⇀ rly short, angst, exes to ?

dating him ⇀ established relationship, boyfriend headcanons, fluff

✰ han jisung

meet odd ☆

⇀ acquaintance to lovers, college au, fluff (2.3k words)

you get to know han jisung under strange circumstances or alternatively “we live in the same floor and the room between ours always has really loud sex so now we’re both in the main lounge at 2am… do you want this last bit of ice cream?”

don’t be a stranger

⇀ friends to lovers, college au, fluff, part 2 to meet odd (4.3k words)

you really need to stop meeting han jisung under odd circumstances or alternatively, i accidentally locked myself out of my apartment and you’re offering that i sleep at yours for the night?

to be human ☆

⇀ roommate au, friends to lovers, kind of comfort fic, supernatural au (~1k words)

your shapeshifter friend forgets how to turn back into a human and has a crisis

instead of sorry, i love you

⇀ established relationship, angst to fluff, makeup after a fight (~0.7k words)

inspired by that one han jisung voicemail

loving is terrifying

⇀ best friends to lovers, accidental confessions, fluff (1.6k words)

in the midst of ranting, han jisung accidentally confesses he’s in love with you

han vs homework

⇀ established relationship, lots of kissing, fluff (1.0k words)

ur clingy bf han jisung just wants to kiss u silly

howl and sophie

⇀ best friends to lovers, fluff (0.8k words)

han realizes he’s in love with you

ten things han jisung says when he thinks you’re asleep ☆ ⇀ established relationship, fluff, a sprinkle of angst

dating him ⇀ established relationship, boyfriend headcanons, fluff

✰ hwang hyunjin

practice makes perfect

⇀ best friends to lovers, college au, fluff (2.1k words)

hyunjin stresses how important it is that you help him practice for his role in your university’s upcoming play, especially the kissing scene

a memory kept forever ☆

⇀ best friends to lovers au, fluff (1.1k words)

your favorite memory litters hwang hyunjin (conversation inspired by a lumax scene in s4)

summer strike ☆

⇀ strangers to lovers, found family, fluff (23k words)

having had enough of your life in the big city, you head to a small town where you meet a local librarian who feels a lot like love

the first snowflake

⇀ unrequited love, comfort, best friends to ? (1.0k words)

your best friend comforts you over unrequited love

in the quiet

⇀ idol au, fluff, established relationship (0.6k words)

there is love on stage, and there is love in the background. or in other words, hyunjin holds you in the quiet of his hotel room

it takes two

⇀ best friends to lovers, comfort (1.1k words)

he helps you shower bc of your inability to after you’d accidentally wounded yourself

ten things hwang hyunjin says when he thinks you’re asleep ⇀ established relationship, fluff, a sprinkle of angst

dating him ⇀ established relationship, boyfriend headcanons, fluff

✰ yang jeongin

imagine (a world like that) ☆

⇀ exes to not so lovers, first love, bittersweet (3k words)

a trip back to busan on his break reunites jeongin with his first and only love — and it has him wondering, if one thing had been different, would everything be different today?

my girl

⇀ established relationship, fluff (1.3k words)

the boys find out their youngest has a gf

ten things yang jeongin says when he thinks you’re asleep ⇀ established relationship, fluff, a sprinkle of angst

dating him ⇀ established relationship, boyfriend headcanons, fluff

✰ lee minho

kiss me

⇀ established relationship, fluff, lots of kissing (1.4k words)

your favorite genre of lee minho is when he’s needy and begging for your kisses after a long exhausting day

winter wind

⇀ best friends to lovers, pining (1.5k words)

a look into lee minho’s realization that maybe he is eager for the affection of someone else featuring the menaces, seungmin and jisung

labyrinth ☆

⇀ best friends to lovers, college au, slow burn, comfort, second love (20k words)

sometimes, the path towards healing involves not only mending your heart but trusting in the love of those who have been there all along, or alternatively, in which lee minho teaches you to love again

another year with you ☆

⇀ established relationship, cozy mornings, fluff, for lee know’s birthday (0.5k words)

waking up to you and his cats, minho couldn’t possibly ask for anything more on his birthday

new year’s day

⇀ established relationship, just quiet and sweet love (0.8k words)

“i’ll be cleaning up bottles with you on new year’s day” inspired by taylor’s new year’s day

the making of a morning person

⇀ established relationship, fluff (1.7k words)

there is still time for love even in busy mornings

stay (forever, if you’d like) ☆

⇀ best friends to eventual established relationship, fluff (2.3k words)

the six times he asks you to stay

ten things lee know says when he thinks you’re asleep ☆ ⇀ established relationship, fluff, a sprinkle of angst

dating him ⇀ established relationship, boyfriend headcanons, fluff

✰ seo changbin

drunk in love ☆

⇀ best friends to lovers, mutual pining, extreme fluff (2.2k words)

getting drunk for the first time with the one person you trust the most doesn’t sound like a bad idea, right? even if you’re madly in love with them?

ten things seo changbin says when he thinks you’re asleep ⇀ established relationship, fluff, a sprinkle of angst

dating him ⇀ established relationship, boyfriend headcanons, fluff

✰ lee felix

when it rains, it pours

⇀ established relationship, hurt/comfort (1k words)

you’re upset. you don’t know why, but felix is there to hold your hand through your sadness

swipe

⇀ strangers to lovers, chronicles of dating apps, felix is flirty, fluff (3.2k words)

i’m not looking to date right now, but my parents just sent me some computer parts and i saw on your tinder bio that you like assembling computers

brownies 4 u

⇀ established relationship, fluff (0.7k words)

there is love in the freshly, baked brownies he bakes for you despite being exhausted

ten things lee felix says when he thinks you’re asleep ⇀ established relationship, fluff, a sprinkle of angst

dating him ⇀ established relationship, boyfriend headcanons, fluff

✰ bang chan

one more month ☆

⇀ established relationship, fluff, idol au (0.6k words)

chan misses you while he’s on tour

coming home ☆

⇀ established relationship, fluff, idol au (0.8k words)

chan surprises you by coming home

shall we dance?

⇀ strangers to lovers, fluff (0.9k words)

chan giving you his shoes when your feet hurt

ten things bang chan says when he thinks you’re asleep ⇀ established relationship, fluff, a sprinkle of angst

dating him ⇀ established relationship, boyfriend headcanons, fluff

✰ ot8

their reaction to you falling asleep on them and telling them you love them for the first time ⇀ established relationship, just extreme fluff

the unsent project (angst edition)

stolen kisses with stray kids ⇀ established relationship, extreme fluff, some might be suggestive ?

[celestie0]

ok, this is something that i've been thinking about for a while, and i need to share my thoughts with you so hear me out…

imagine gojo and yn being academic rivals at school, both wanting to be better than the other, and both wanting to be the student council president. but in the end, gojo ends up taking the role as he's popular among everyone, leaving yn bitter.

gojo and yn graduate high school and go their respective paths—gojo to med school and yn to law school—never seeing each other again (or so they thought). years later, gojo is a surgeon working at his family's hospital (yes, because he's a nepo baby lmao, his parents both came from generation after generation of doctors and surgeons, so it was natural for him to go in the same direction, although he had a strained relationship with his parents). yn, on the other hand, is a qualified medical lawyer (i think you know where this is going atp but imma continue lol).

imagine yn breaking up with her bf of almost a decade and being left completely heartbroken. upon realizing that her life wasn't as perfect as she thought (having barely any friends and only depending on her ex), she goes through a whole identity crisis and decides that she needs to change her environment. this is where she moves cities and starts a new life in a whole different place. she gets a new job at a hospital as a healthcare lawyer.

on her first day of work, she turns up all excited at her new workplace and everything is going well. as she works through the day, she gets familiar with all the departments and the staff, makes new acquaintances like shoko, who insists on introducing her to her other friends/colleagues whom she went to college with. yn agrees, reminding herself that she needs to make more friends and not end up like she was when she was with her ex—all alone. shoko introduces her to geto and then a very familiar face who also seems to recognize her. upon realizing who she was facing, they both immediately start tweaking, and the rest is history (i can't be bothered to write more hahaha).

pls i was so invested reading this LOL xd this sounds soooooo freaking good i love stories where there's like professional aspect or just workplace romances in general,, those are my FAAAAAVESS and this has academic rivals trope?!?!? anon i fear you've just created like my most ideal story ever lmfaooo if you ever write this PLEAASASEEE lemme know

[ana-bananya]

Boosting some fundraisers:

‼️ indicates that a fundraiser has experienced a decrease in donations or has been without donations for some time

Evacuation fund for Hani and family ($967/$50,000)‼️

Support Ahmed's family's evacuation (€19,256/€35,000)

Help baby Omer evacuate and get treatment ($23,213/$55,000)

Save Yazan's family (€3,182/€50,000 - VERY low on funds)

Mohammed Alzaanin's family (€94,775/€118,000) ‼️

Save a 5y old Sudanese child's life in Wad Madani (€5,195/€9,000) ‼️

Help Abudjana rebuild after war (£3,155/£5,000) ‼️

Help a Sudanese student finish med school ($2,100/$2,500) ‼️

Help a family of 13 evacuate Sudan ($1,091/$20,000 - VERY low on funds) ‼️

Help Refugee’s escape Sudan Conflict ($7,595 CAD/$31,000 CAD - VERY low on funds) ‼️

Donate to the Humanitarian Crisis in Congo , organized by Focus Congo and Elvis Katoto (£2,659/10,000 - VERY low on funds) ‼️

Support displaced civilians in Goma  ($2,921/$20,000 - VERY low on funds) ‼️

Help bring clean water to the Congo, organized by Alyssa Cole and Focus Congo ($14,214/$15,000)

Goma Upendo ($6,013 CAD/$50,000 CAD - VERY low on funds)

Goma Actif  (€46,947/€75,000)

PH4 Global Education Development

Hope for Haiti

Action Against Hunger

Progression Society Art School Fund - A New Start ($2,548 CAD/$5,500 CAD)

You can check my pinned post for more places to donate

[theficpusher]

They Just Don't Know You by mukeandziamgotmelike | nr | 1306 //So, oh, tell me, tell me you won't break my heart. That you won't tear my world apart. That you'll be there when I need, cause I wanna tell them they just don't know you, they just don't know you, they just don't know you, they don't know you like I do.// -OR- Liam has been dating Zayn for months, and still, for some reason, no one approves of him. It's annoying, and Liam wishes they would stop. He doesn't know why they don't trust Zayn, but he just wants to tell them that they just don't know him like he does.

Screaming But Daddy I Love Him by Wishingforloushair | E | 21873 Harry has always tried to be the perfect Christian boy his religiously fanatic mother demands him to be. At seventeen he's never eaten fast food, drunk coffee (unless it was decaffeinated) or touched himself. That is until he meets Louis, one of the church's youth musicians. With his 'I Heart Jesus' stickers on his beaten up guitar case, his band (The Redemption Riffs), and his taste for good quality coffee, Louis' relationship with God is entirely different to Harry's, and Harry is positive that Louis is either a divine vessel, or Heaven-sent. Prepared to worship at Louis' feet, Harry is ready to learn a whole different way of worship and devotion with Louis' help. “That’s coffee,” he remarked, pointing at the dark substance in the other boy’s cup. “Yes, it is,” Louis said, taking a sip from it, his eyes fixed on Harry. “Is it decaffeinated?” Louis raised an eyebrow, putting his mug down. “Will it make you feel better if I tell you it is?” “Lying is bad.” “Then, no, it’s not decaf. I don’t drink decaf coffee because it tastes awful.” “But,” Harry swallowed, glancing over his shoulder before leaning forwards. “Drugs are bad,” he whispered.

What Side Of Love Are You On? by FallingLikeThis | T | 25000 Ever since Harry finally made the decision to come out to his mother as bisexual, she’s been foisting women on him left and right, determined it’s just a phase. But when she puts out a personal ad to find the perfect partner for her son, things really get complicated. Suddenly, Harry’s heart is being pulled in two very different directions. On one side is the sweet, caring woman he has fun with, but doesn’t know his mother chose for him. On the other is a man who seems to be his mother’s worst nightmare, but makes Harry’s heart flutter in ways he’s never felt before. When all is said and done, maybe they’ll all learn that when there is no clear path to go down, the best option is to follow your heart. A Because I Said So Au with a bisexual twist.

but daddy i love him by wanderlou | nr | 28924 Someone cleared their throat and they all turned to the person; Charles. “I cannot and will not support this marriage.” “But Daddy…I love him,” Louis pouted. Or the one where Harry and Louis are getting married and Louis' dad hates Harry. Harry does everything to try and earn his respect during the wedding weekend.

adrenaline by reveries_passions | M | 38208 “Harry Styles,” Nameless Boy who now has a name says. Louis is too busy having an internal crisis to realize the boy has just introduced himself as Harry Styles. Harry Styles, only son of Des Styles, PhD, Dean of Harvard Medical School. Harry Styles, known by everyone and their grandmother. Harry Styles, star rower. Harry Styles, youngest enrolled student in graduate school at Harvard University. Oh my god, Louis thinks, mortified. I just slept with Harry Styles. As he reaches out tentatively to shake the boy’s hand, another thought hits him. Oh my god. Harry Styles is gay. ~ louis tomlinson, college dropout, up and coming dj, and gay activist, is the notorious owner of exclusive underground gay club, adrenaline. harry styles, med student by day, partier by night, child prodigy and seemingly heterosexual son of harvard professors, is the youngest and arguably the smartest student at harvard medical school. or: a one night stand wasn't supposed to become the greatest love story of the 21st century.

Counterbalance by YesIsAWorld | E | 44777 Harry Styles loves two things: teaching ballet and racing motorcycles. Those two worlds collide when his greatest rival on the track, Louis “Tommo” Tomlinson brings his tiny siblings to Harry’s class.

your memory over me by shimmeringevil | E | 64355 Three years have passed since Louis last saw him, but all it took was a few minutes in Harry’s presence for him to be relegated to the desperate twenty-one year old that was practically begging his boyfriend for an ounce of reassurance that he still cared about him. Harry shouldn’t be here. He’s brought too many unresolved feelings with him, that Louis thought he’d never have to face. It’s Harry’s apparent apathy that’s the most difficult to come to terms with. Anger, he could handle. Regret, he would welcome. But Harry’s amiability, and carefree demeanor can only be born from indifference. He’s moved on. He doesn’t care. And that is something Louis doesn’t think he’ll ever be strong enough to face. - OR - The worst heartbreak of Louis’ life walks right back into it when his parents invite their family friends on an all-expenses-paid trip for their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Facing a past that he tried to bury long ago, Louis learns that some people have a way of sticking with you even when they’re gone.

Of Mates and Men by bananaheathen | E | 630460 In which, Louis and Harry meet as best men for their best friends' wedding... well... sort of. Or, the one where Harry's just moved back from New York and Louis doesn't believe in romance. Or, I guess... the one where Zayn and Liam are getting married.

[cha0ticspacebi]

Like 91% of the population, you were now and would always be a beta. Except when your roommate moves out suddenly and fate connects you with Alpha Eddie Munson. After that, things start to change.

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 (Coming Soon)

Pairing: Alpha Eddie Munson x Female Omega Reader

Word Count: 10.4 k

Tags: Omegaverse and everything that goes with it (knotting, nesting, scenting, heats, ruts, breeding kink, biting, you get the idea), college student reader, mechanic Eddie, panty sniffing but not from who you probably think, reader is a little freak but it's just her new instincts, a few instances were reader expresses body insecurities, talks of infertility, minor Steve Harrington x Chrissy Cunningham, and they were roommates! ⚠️ 21+ MDNI ⚠️

divider by firefly-graphics

All through public school sex education classes, you were told that if you didn’t experience signs of presenting during a certain time period, you never would. Most people don’t. That was certainly the case for you. Puberty came and went without the slightest hint of a secondary gender.

Even as society around you exists in the midst of a massive fertility crisis, more than 91% of the population is classified as beta. Experts in the field predicted that with the rapidly declining birth rates that we might see a rise in alpha and omega pairings but so far that has not been the case. No viable differences were seen until last year when the number of known alphas increased by a meager .2%.

Still, many beta couples continue to seek assistance with conceiving a child, which is part of the reason why you decided that would be your field of study. Currently a third year med student at a university, whose promising research in the field is making headlines all over the world, you hoped one day to become a fertility consultant. Helping all those who wish to start a family achieve their dream. 

Ever since you could remember you’ve wanted to help people. In grade school you helped the new student find their way around. You helped the teacher with everyday classroom tasks. Everywhere you went, if you saw someone in need of a helping hand, you provided. Reaching a box of cereal from the top shelf at the grocery store and placing it with a smile in the elderly man’s basket. Helping a lost little girl in the park, you saw on your morning jog, find her mother. Offering to spend your first weekend off in a month helping your roommate move into her new place. Even though that meant you were now a one income dwelling, who wouldn’t be sustained for long on your meager university coffee house earnings.

After helping her, you arrived back to your suddenly empty two bedroom apartment. The immediate urgency for you to find a replacement roommate became very real, very fast. 

The next day you posted fliers all over campus, including the coffee shop, the library, even at the athletic center! You asked your friend Robin to stick some up on the bulletin board at her job as well.

“I actually might know someone,” her eyes flashed quickly from the flier to you, “Someone who could, in theory, move in before next weekend if that's cool with you.”

You practically leaped at her offer, “Absolutely! What’s her name?”

“His name is Eddie and he’s a—“

“Oh,” you’d never had a male roommate before. You considered this new development until glancing at the clock on the wall. You were going to be late for class! While voicing your thoughts about her proposal, you were already headed towards the door, “I guess as long as he’s not a total slob and pays his part of the rent on time that’s all that matters. Give him my number and tell him to call me, I gotta go!”

“Wait! There’s one more thing,” Robin tries to scream after you but you're already running out the front door of the Family Video. 

She watches your car pull away and shakes her head as she forwards your contact info, “Oh well, she’ll figure it out on her own pretty quickly.”

Tuesday was always your longest day. First the opening shift with the morning rush of tired college kids desperate for their caffeine fix. Working what felt like nonstop until noon, followed by classes until after 8:00 at night. By the time you trudged your tired ass back to your apartment, all you wanted to do was sleep. Days like today were why you started leaving a pillow and blanket on the couch because sometimes taking those few extra steps to the bedroom were simply out of the question. 

Collapsing into the cushions, you felt your eyes get heavy and all your muscles finally relaxed. Sleep would come easy tonight.

Until the buzzing of your phone brought you back from the edge of sleepy bliss. You had a text from an unknown number.

Hey, this is Eddie. Robin’s friend. She said you needed a roommate! That’s such a coincidence because I’m a mate who needs a room. 

You couldn’t help the little bud of a smile that grew as you looked at the laughing emoji he added to the end of the text. Is it allowed to make first impressions from a single text? Oh well, your initial impression, he’s a goofball. Playful sort of boy next door, childhood friends in another life maybe. Meeting him in person couldn’t hurt right? Robin wouldn’t have suggested it to you if she didn’t think the two of you would get along.

Hi Eddie, I’m free tomorrow after 5 if you want to stop by and take a look. Try it before you buy it right?

You found yourself holding your phone waiting for his response. Eyes suddenly a little less heavy than before. He didn’t keep you waiting long.

It has four walls, a door, and comes with a sweetheart like you? Consider it sold!

Sweetheart? Sure Robin probably told him you're a nice person and all but that’s a little, buzz. Your thoughts were interrupted as he messaged again.

Sorry, I hope that didn't come across as pushy. I don’t want you to think I’m some stereotype. I try not to act like an entitled jerk all the time. It’s just, Robin showed me a picture of the two of you at the lake last summer and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think you were pretty.

The thought that he knew what you looked like and was still sending you cheeky messages made you happier than you’d like to admit. You remembered that trip and knew exactly what picture she must have shown him. It was one of the few where you actually felt good about yourself. With another yawn, you typed a response.

You could make it up to me by leveling the playing field? I should know who I’m expecting to meet tomorrow and possibly share a place with. 

Within just a few minutes an image appeared on the screen. He was straddling a vintage motorcycle with a helmet in his hands. Oh. 

You weren’t sure what caught your eye more, his soft looking curly hair, his dark chocolate eyes, or those dimples in his cheeks from the smile he was flashing the camera. He followed the picture up with another message.

Rob told me you were in class all day so I’ll leave you alone since you’re probably tired. Get some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow around 5 roomie!

You should be annoyed. First he calls you sweetheart. Then he has the nerve to tell you to go to sleep, like you’re a child who was up past their bedtime. Then to top it all off, this man has the audacity to assume that just because you exchanged a few texts that he can move right in? Who does he think he is? You should be annoyed– but you’re not. Quite the opposite actually, you just got a little more excited for tomorrow. You fell asleep on the couch with that spout of a smile still growing slowly on your lips. 

Heading home after class the next day felt different. Instead of going home stressing about an exam or worrying about how you are going to pay next month's rent, you feel a touch of nervousness mingling with the excitement for a first meeting. You secretly hoped that Eddie was as cute in person as his picture.

Fate was smiling on you today because class had gotten out a little early giving you just enough time to straighten up the apartment before Eddie arrived. 

You hung a clean hand towel up in the bathroom, put fresh sheets on the bed that your old roommate left behind and smiled when you lit the pine scented candle that sat on the coffee table. Happy that you could get one more light out of it before it would need to be replaced. You fluffed the decorative throw pillows on the couch and finally closed the door to your own room before waiting to hear the knock on the door.

When that noise finally echoed through the quiet air you felt your body shiver with anticipation. You let out a reassuring breath, hoping it would calm your nerves and opened the door.

“Hey!” he smiled as brightly as the picture he’d sent you while he greeted you by name, “So? Am I as cute as my picture? Because you certainly are.”

Add big flirt to your first impressions. He was definitely laying on the charm but you were also falling for it hook line and sinker, “Hi Eddie, it’s nice to meet you. Come on in!”

You offered your arm in a welcoming gesture. He stepped inside and brushed past you ever so slightly. He must be wearing a strong cologne. Just that quick pass had your senses overwhelmed with the earthy, woodsy smell.

“So this is the common area,” you pointed out all the usual necessities, “Here’s the bathroom, there’s the kitchen. Off to the side there is a little dining table but I’ll be honest I think I’ve used it once. I usually end up eating on the couch.” He commented on how it was a nice place and that it was so close to his work he could walk when the weather got nice again. 

“Where do you work?”

He closed the kitchen cabinet he’d been snooping in and turned to you, “I’m a mechanic over at Murray’s Auto Repair. Rob said you work at the coffee shop on campus, what’s your field of study, young scholar?” 

“Medical. I’m studying to be a fertility specialist,” you made small talk with him as you walked over to show him where his room is… would be! Where his room would be, if you think he’d be a good fit, “Here’s the other room. My old roommate said I could keep the bed and the dresser but if you already have those we can donate these since they’re in pretty good shape.”

He nodded, “Nah they look alright to me. I’m currently crashing on a friend's couch so this would be a huge upgrade.” He inspected the door handle, “Does this door not have a lock?”

“No, mine doesn’t lock either. I always figured it was because they are interior doors?” you shrugged and joined him as he inspected the boring metal doorknob, “They make portable locks you could always use.”

“Yeah, those things aren’t very strong though and when I’m in rut I can get pretty–” you cut him off.

“I’m sorry, when you're in what?”

The complete shock in your eyes and slack jaw had him pulling back a bit from you. A dejected huff through his nose, accompanied by a shake of the head told you he wasn’t too pleased with your question, “I thought Rob told you?”

“She didn’t tell me anything besides your name and the fact you were looking for a place,” you swallowed hard. You were in your third year of med school, you knew damn well what a rut was but the problem here was that only alphas experience them so if he… the wheels clicked in your head and you suddenly felt small standing beside him, “You’re an alpha?”

He crossed his arms, “Is that a problem? I wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable so you just say the word and I’m gone.”

His messages last night suddenly made a little more sense. He didn’t want to come across as a stereotypical hotheaded, asshole alpha. Truthfully though, he had been nothing but respectful so far. He had a steady job and already offered to pay your half of the rent for the first month! He even promised to do half the household chores. Honestly, he seemed like a great candidate for a roommate. Why should his status change any of that?

You shook your head, “No it’s alright.” You rocked on your heels with your hands held behind your back, trying to restore the conversation to its former comfort level, “So, when can you move in?”

His smile reappeared, but he didn’t answer your question. He instead turned and belly flopped onto the bed, you heard a deep sigh escape his mouth, “Shit, can I stay here tonight? I really don’t want to sleep on that couch again.” He turned on his hip and looked at you from the bed, “You know Rob’s friend Steve?” You shook your head, you’d only known Robin since the spring semester and hadn’t met any of her friends yet, “Well Harrington’s a great guy but he’s a family man now and can’t have a lonely alpha crashing on his couch anymore.”

You stood awkwardly in the doorway, unsure if you should intrude on the space he just claimed, “Is Steve also an alpha?”

“Yeah. He and I had been living together for years before he met that sweet Chrissy of his,” he collapsed on his back and stared at the ceiling, “They had a kid, cute little boy, a few months ago and I lost my room.”

“Is Chrissy an omega?” you were mentally taking notes. Before Eddie came waltzing through your door, you’d never gotten the chance to talk to someone with a secondary gender at length before. There were some alphas you knew of in your classes throughout the years, mostly because all of them were loud and obnoxious about it. But none that you ever felt compelled to converse with. If they were cool with it, maybe they could answer some questions for the paper your gender sciences professor just assigned. Having some first hand alpha/omega pairbond experience would be great for your research. 

“Nah,” well nevermind, considering the low omega presentation rates you’d have been shocked if that was the case. You could always talk to Eddie about what it’s like to be an unmated alpha. He continued, “Never actually had the pleasure of meeting one. I hear they are crazy sweet though.”

You asked Eddie if he needed to go get anything from Steve’s place tonight, to which he just insisted he’d go tomorrow while you were in class. You had been so anxious for his arrival that you forgot to eat so you offered to cook dinner for him. 

“You really don’t have to,” he tried to stop you but then his stomach growled loud enough that it was probably heard from the hallway by a passing neighbor. 

You both looked at each other and you tried not to laugh at his embarrassed expression, but it wasn’t working, “So is ramen ok? If you’re going to live with a starving college student you’re going to have to eat like one. Not that you aren’t welcome to bring in your own food or whatever. I can clear a shelf off for you.” With that you got distracted reorganizing the sparse contents of the fridge, “There. We can put shared items in the middle, I’ll put the things I buy on the bottom and you can have the top shelf.”

You opened the door wider with a smile as he admired your work. You decided after dinner you’d do the same thing with the cabinets and clear a space just for him, “Ok now I’ve definitely worked up an appetite,” reaching up into the cupboard you presented him with two options, “Do you want spicy or regular?”

He gave in. Already, barely an hour in the apartment, and he knew he was no match for you, “Spicy. Thanks, sweetheart.”

You turned on whatever movie was already in the machine while you cooked and then just a few minutes later you were placing a simple bowl of noodles in front of him. He inhaled them, “That was delicious. I’m doing the dishes!” you were about to protest, “No, don’t even try to argue with me. You've already done enough and I’ve only lived here about 2 hours! I can’t have you doing everything for me. I need to pull my weight.”

“Fine, but sit down and finish the movie first.”

He sat on the opposite end of the couch from you. You chose to ignore the little tug that wished he sat closer to you. 

“Is that candle what I’m smelling?” he asked abruptly.

“Probably,” you leaned towards the coffee table and read him the label, “Evergreen Forest?”

His brows furrow, “No, this is sweeter.” He laughed, “When I first stepped in here I thought you were baking cookies, it was so sweet. I still haven’t been able to figure out where it's coming from.”

“Maybe one of the neighbors is baking something?” You weren’t really sure how to respond because you also had no idea what he could be smelling. You weren’t one for perfume and none of your soaps, shampoos, or body wash smelled sweet. At least he didn’t say the apartment smelled bad.

“Sorry, I’m being weird,” he brought you out of your daydream, “Alpha nose,” he poked himself in the tip of his nose, “I’m really sensitive to scent.”

“It’s ok! I find secondary genders fascinating. It’s part of the reason I chose to study fertility.”

He laughed and twisted himself to face you more from his spot on the couch, “Ah, I see. That’s why you let me move in so fast. Using my body for science hm?”

You couldn’t tell if he was joking or not so you deflated a little, “No of course not. I just think the phenomenon is interesting. Growing up I always hoped one day I would present, especially after I was told I can’t have kids.”

His laughing faded. The familiar sad, almost pitying look appeared that everyone gives you when you tell them. You’re not shy about it and you don’t care who knows. Despite having been focused entirely on building your career since you turned 18 and got that news, you do get asked by outsiders quite often when you’re going to settle down and have kids. 

Here comes the inevitable follow up question. He asks you if you want kids, “I’d love to start a family someday.” You shrug and anxiously rub your knees, “I’m painfully single though, so, one step at a time I guess.”

His laughter was quickly becoming your favorite sound in the world, “Me too! Do you mind if I ask how old you are?”

“I’m 26,” you smiled, “What about you?”

“27. I presented when I was 17 and after I finally managed to graduate high school I went to a trade school to become a mechanic.” He laughed again to himself, “Not that I needed any of it. Already learned all there was to learn from my uncle.”

The title screen of the movie playing in the background and the thought of your 6 AM shift were shoved aside as you spent hours talking with him on the couch. You learned where he grew up, that he played in a band for fun with his friends, and that he was a giant nerd. Everything from Dungeons and Dragons, to Lord of the Rings, to Star Wars. He loved all of it. 

You told him about your hobbies outside of school as well. He asked you questions about what kind of music you like, what your favorite color is, and listened to you talk about the things that interested you. It was kind of alarming how comfortable you already felt with him. He was incredibly easy to talk to. Finally, your body knew you’d regret staying up any later than you already had. You yawned.

“Alright pretty girl I’ve bothered you long enough. Go get some sleep,” he raised an arm and rubbed the back of his neck, “Are you sure it’s ok if I stay here tonight? I know it’s short notice and I wouldn’t want you to feel like you had to let me stay. I can move in officially this weekend if that works better.” 

You surrendered. Standing right up and following his order, “It’s fine Eddie. I offered you the room didn’t I? Besides,” you yawned again, “Since you’re covering rent next month you might as well get your money's worth. Although I don’t have any extra blankets,” another yawn became the final nail in your coffin, “All I had was that sheet. I might have some pillows in the linen closet,” you went to check but he stopped you with his words.

“You’re too kind, fair maiden. I don’t need much when I sleep anyways,” he gestured to himself, “Alpha’s usually run pretty hot.” You snorted and shook your head. As different as he is, you can definitely tell he’s still an alpha. He rose from the couch with a deep bow, “I look forward to our adventures together as roommates,” he flicked his hair back up and flashed you a great view of those dimples, “Good night sweetheart.”

Eddie moved in his stuff little by little, the whole process took nearly a week. When you returned home each day you would notice a few new additions here and there. He stuck his shampoo in the bathroom, there was a six pack of beer on his shelf in the refrigerator, and you could typically hear music playing from his room at night. Finally the last item, a second guitar amp, landed in his now fully lived in room. 

It had officially been a week since he moved the last of his stuff in and the two of you fell into a routine. Eddie’s shifts at the shop were usually the same time you were in class. If he got home before you and made some food, he left you a container on your shelf in the fridge. The last few times he’d started leaving a note on the container labeled “Roomie!” a little heart with bat wings drawn with markers that he definitely swiped from your backpack.  Tonight you were getting home first and decided to surprise him for being the world's best roommate. 

Your mind thought back to yesterday as you got started. You had just gotten out of the shower when he mentioned that sweet smell again. You figured he might have a sweet tooth so you decided to make cookies for him.

You tied your hair back and put on the apron you’d found on clearance after Valentine’s Day. It was pink with little conversation hearts scattered everywhere. A picture of a ladybug and the caption Love Bug written across the chest. After completing the scene with some of your favorite music playing softly in the background, you started to work.

After grabbing the flour and sugar, your cheeks felt warm. You had to check the clock to confirm, you’d only been working for a few minutes and you already felt flushed. As though you had been working in the summer heat for hours. You opened the small window that was situated beside your dining table and the cold winter air wafted into the warm kitchen.  It helped a bit. 

Setting the heat in your cheeks aside, you forgot about it after a while. You didn’t even realize how focused on your task you’d become. You felt relaxed. Every care of the outside world was gone. After mixing the last ingredient, the chocolate chips, into the dough and scooping them onto the baking sheet, you put them in the oven. 

“Hm,” you mused to yourself while looking through the cabinet. Wondering if you had the ingredients to make an icing to write #1 roomie on one of the cookies. 

Your mission was successful and while the cookies baked you whipped up a small amount. Giving you just enough time to do the dishes before pulling the cookies out to cool. You checked the time again. It was just after 5:00 and you knew Eddie would be back soon. Scooping the icing into a small ziplock baggie, you tried your best to write on the uneven surface. He walked in just after you finished the last letter.

“Hi Eddie!” You smiled brightly, proud of your work. Then you held out a small plate to him with the cookie, “I made this for you!”

He froze. His body went rigid there in the door frame. For the first time since you met, there was an uncomfortable silence. He just stared at you for a moment. Then, without a word, walked over, grabbed the plate from your hand and went into his room. Leaving you standing there in the kitchen dazed, confused, and if you were honest with yourself, a little sad.

You didn’t see him again that night. He stayed in his room. Replaying that event in your mind you cleaned up, left the rest of the cookies in a tupperware container on the counter, and headed to bed. 

You tried to sleep but the more you pondered, your sadness turned to annoyance. You needed to complain about him so you called Robin. 

“Hey! What’s up?” she sounded cheerful, “Isn’t it way past your bedtime?”

You offered a curt pity laugh, “Haha, very funny. Can I ask you something?”

“Sure, I’m assuming based on your tone there’s trouble in roommate heaven?” She nailed it and your frustrations poured out like a waterfall.

“I made him cookies and he acted like I committed a crime. He gave me this look, didn’t say anything, snatched the cookie I offered him, and has been hiding in his room ever since. Is he allergic to chocolate? He might as well be with how upset he looked,” you mocked his non existence words, “Oh, I can’t believe the nerve of this girl, making me cookies, letting me move in with her on such short notice! Alpha Jerk.”

Once your rant was over she hummed, “Eddie’s always had a sweet tooth, that doesn’t make any sense. I need more details. What were you wearing?” 

“Just my normal clothes I wore to class today. I did have an apron on to keep my shirt clean, but why should any of that matter?”

She laughed, “Sounds to me like you might’ve broken him. Let me guess you went full domestic goddess?”

“Well I wouldn’t describe it like that but—“

She interrupted you, “Eddie’s a simple alpha babe. An alpha who, by the way, has never been with an omega. You cooking things just for him? Classic omega behavior, you should know that Ms. Smarty-Science-Pants. On top of that, looking like absolute wife material probably had his brain sizzling like a piece of bacon.”

You listened to her but it didn’t matter, “I’m not an omega though.” Your words were more sad than you’d like to think about.

You could hear her exasperated sigh, “His brain doesn’t know that. I’m telling you that’s all it was. He’s probably hiding because he’s got a huge hard on!”

“Robin!” You yelled and immediately listened for any signs that he might’ve heard your yell. You tiptoed to the door and listened. Nothing. You waited until back in the safety of your bed before talking again, “I’ll admit, you might be right about the first part. But,” you heart sank a little, “I doubt he’s in there with a hard on. There’s no way he feels that way about me.”

“Why not?” Robin combated, “You’re fucking adorable! And If he doesn’t, he’s clearly not using those heightened alpha senses of his because anyone would be lucky to have you.”

You bloomed again, “Thanks Robin. I feel a little better. I’m gonna get some sleep. I’ll see you later.”

The next morning you went about your normal routine. If you hadn’t decided to grab some rations from the kitchen to stuff in your backpack in perpetration for a day full of learning, you’d have missed it. There on the counter where you left the container, now a lot more empty than before, sat a little note. Thanks sweetheart. He left his signature bat heart. You smiled to yourself and flashed your eyes to his door. As if it could’ve been anyone else who wrote the note for you. 

A few days after the cookie incident, you and Eddie had resumed your normal interactions. Although, you hadn’t really stopped thinking about what Robin said. You were on the couch watching some random show on TV when he came in from work.

“Hey,” he sounded tired.

“Hey,” you checked the time, “Thought you got off at 5? I was surprised when I beat you home.”

He went, as he always does, to the bathroom and washed his hands. But this time he made a pit stop to set a small sparkly red bag on the coffee table in front of you, “I was supposed to, had to stay and finish fixing this stupid truck. Damn thing is just going to need to be fixed again in three months anyways.” He stood in the bathroom doorway and looked between you and the bag, “That’s for you.”

You felt the color appear on your face, “Me? Why?”

He replaced the towel he’d been wiping his hands on and walked back to the living room, “Dunno, I felt bad I guess about the other day and when I stopped at the store on my way home I saw that little guy and thought of you.” He spoke in a rushed manner like he was trying to get the words out without making a big deal out of it.

You looked inside the bag and found a small brown teddy bear with a red bow tied around its neck. It was so sweet. You held him in your hands and felt the softness of his fur beneath your fingers. 

“I just wanted to say sorry. Not trying to you know, I don’t know. You can just throw it away when I’m not looking or whatever,” Eddie was rambling and it was absolutely adorable.

“No it’s fine. I like him,” you loved him. He was the same color as Eddie’s eyes.

He went to his room after that and must have gone right to sleep because you saw the light from under the door turn off and didn’t hear any music tonight. You sat there on the couch with your new friend for a bit longer and realized something. He only came in with this. If he just happened to see this while already at the store, what did he go to the store for in the first place?

It was one of your rare days off and you were catching up on some laundry. You knew he might view what you were about to ask similarly to the cookies but hey doing laundry in an apartment building is a pain in the ass. If you're going down you might as well bring some of his clothes too. 

You texted him. Hey, I'm doing some laundry. You need anything washed?

He was at work but usually responded pretty quickly if they weren’t busy. They must not be busy. 

Yeah uh sure. That’s cool. Thanks. There’s a little pile in the corner by my guitar.

You were usually really good about respecting the roommate code. You knocked if you needed to get his attention but hadn’t actually been in the second bedroom since he moved in. Only catching quick glimpses when he would enter or exit. 

As soon as you entered, you thought to yourself, My period must be coming. The wall of musky, woodsy scent hit you like a ton of bricks. It was spicy and warm and distinctively Eddie. You stood in the door frame almost trying to catch your breath, Damn it’s probably going to be a rough one, I'm not usually this sensitive.

Once you regained your balance, you learned that Eddie had not one but two guitars. There was a red and black electric one hanging on the wall and a black acoustic one sitting on a stand beside his dresser. He didn’t specify in his message which one you should look by and both of them had piles of wadded up clothing near them. 

Trying not to inhale too deeply for fear of passing out, you pulled the collar of your shirt up over your nose and grabbed the first pile under the electric guitar. A few shirts and what looked to be pants that he might wear under his coveralls at work.

With still a little room in your basket, you made your way to the second pile. Opting to just pick all of it up at once and drop it in with the other clothes. You instantly knew this probably wasn’t the one he wanted you to wash. Sitting on top of your now shared laundry were several pairs of crusty looking socks and balled up boxers that had been hiding under a shirt. 

You knew you should put them back. Recreate the scene and walk away like you never touched them in the first place. Maybe he wouldn’t notice you had disturbed them. That's what you should do. You knew that. But something stirred inside you. You acted almost on instinct and before you could think too hard about it, you were picking up a pair of his green plaid boxer shorts and bringing them up to your nose.

When you inhaled the scent quite literally knocked you down. You fell backwards onto your ass. A euphoric feeling consumed you, it was like nothing you’d ever felt before. Suddenly your cheeks were flushed, your heartbeat quickened, and you knew you needed more. You smelled them again.

The room smelled like Eddie of course, it was his room. All his belongings were in here. He spent a good portion of his time here. But this, this was more somehow. More Eddie. Like someone had taken his scent and bottled it into a cologne. Then accidentally spilled an entire bottle onto this single pair of underwear. 

Coming down from your high you knew you had to leave them here, he’d notice if the pile was completely missing. Thus knowing you touched his underwear like a weird pervert. But he might not notice one pair mysteriously going missing. 

With the green pair still clutched in your dirty fingers, you replaced each soiled item one by one and covered them back up with the shirt. Then stood back on your feet, picked up the laundry basket, and continued your task as though the last few minutes didn’t happen. 

He came home from work that night to a small pile of neatly folded shirts and pants placed carefully on his bed. There was also a small container of take out with his name on it waiting for him in the fridge. You didn’t have the courage to face him that night after what you had done. So you hid away in your room. Leaving him completely unaware of the thievery that had taken place or the hidden treasure that now sat tucked away in your nightstand. 

It was officially one month that you’d been living with Eddie. If he noticed something missing from his wardrobe, he never mentioned it. 

Tonight you were having your first movie night with friends that you hoped to make a weekly occurrence. Robin was already here and tonight you got to meet their mutual friend Steve for the first time when he came over with his partner Chrissy. 

“I poured the popcorn into a few different bowls since it didn’t fit in just one,” Robin said with a smile as she held up two mismatched things of popcorn.

You feigned despair, “Oh no! What’re we gonna do? We can’t let people know that we live like this!” You turned to Eddie and held your cheeks, “What will the neighbors think?”

He laughed, “Your reputation as a good neighbor was probably lost the moment I moved in sweetheart.” His nickname for you became common tongue. You knew it didn’t hold any meaning, just Eddie being, well Eddie.

Robin didn’t approve of your shenanigans, she set the bowls down on the coffee table, “I never should have introduced you two. You're both menaces.” 

“Au contraire!” Eddie defended, “It’s actually a crime that you didn’t introduce us sooner!”

Your heart swelled hearing that, “Aww, you really do care Eddie. Here I was thinking you just used me for my extra room. Is the big bad alpha going soft? 

He smirked, “Nothing soft about me sweetheart.”

“Oh my god can you not make dick jokes for like 5 minutes please?” Robin threw up her hands, “Are we really about to bring another thick headed alpha in here? Seriously, how did you and Steve not kill each other?” 

Your eyes tracked between them as they bickered. Eddie sat in his usual spot on the couch and Robin was about two seconds away from walking back into the kitchen. 

Eddie laughed, “Relax! Steve and I have more sense than that. Besides, he’s got a girlfriend which calmed him down a little.”

“Good, this apartment can only handle one hot alpha,” You blurted out without thinking and instantly regretted it.

Robin, who was no secret to your massive crush on your friend and roommate, covered her laugh and retreated back to the kitchen. Shooting you a look that says you are so on your own with this one.

Eddie just looked at you, for a brief second there was some unreadable emotion there but it quickly turned to a smug grin. His arm swinging over the back of the couch, opening his legs as he crossed one over the other. “Aww you really think I’m hot sweetheart?”

You didn’t answer him. You’d be forever grateful to whoever just knocked on the door. 

On the other side stood a man with fluffy, perfectly placed brown hair and a big smile. Even without the knowledge this man was an alpha, you’d know right away. From the protective arm around this girlfriend’s shoulders and the oozing confidence, this must be none other than Steve Harrington.

Which meant the cute redhead beside him must be Chrissy. She greeted you with a surprise, though not unwelcome, hug, “It’s so great to finally meet you. Eddie’s told us so much about you.”

“Really?” You looked back to Eddie who was uncharacteristically quiet. You decided to just file that in the back of your mind for now, “Come on in! We made popcorn and pizza should be here soon.” Robin had returned and gave Steve a hug. You couldn’t resist the urge to tease her once more, “I hope you don’t mind the mismatched bowls.”

The movie provided an anchor as you got better acquainted with these new friends. You learned that they met through work. Steve is a personal trainer and Chrissy teaches yoga at the community center. Steve was telling you the story of how his jaw literally dropped when Chrissy walked into his gym to inquire about offering classes there. 

Your body language had naturally leaned in while listening to his story. You sat up a little straighter. Your arms braced against your knees as you gave Steve your full attention. Or at least tried to. The frequent twitches you caught from the corner of your eye kept distracting you. Finally you looked over and saw Eddie clenching his fists against his thighs.

You waited until Steve had finished to say something, “Eddie? Are you ok?”  

His eyes were blown wide as he looked in your direction, “Hm? Yeah, I’m fine.” The white knuckles now braced against his chin and the point of his elbow digging into his leg said otherwise.

Steve spoke up before you could, “You sure man? You look like you’re ready to rip somebody’s head off.”

“I said I'm fine!” He snapped. 

In an instant, the once friendly atmosphere turned sour and tense. No one really knew what to do. Everyone looked concerned. Searching for the cause of what had upset him. You however were feeling something very different. All you could think about was touching him. No, not touching, your brain supplied. Scenting. 

You wanted nothing more right now than to nuzzle into his hair and neck. Somehow reassuring him that everything was ok.

Now your eyes were blown wide. Your brain all at once processed this intrusive thought. You knew it was nonsense. It must have come from your lessons during class today. Yeah that’s it. You were still just thinking about today's lecture during gender sciences because you shouldn’t be scenting. That’s something only done by alphas or—

“Who wants dessert?” You jumped up from the couch and headed into the kitchen. You heard footsteps behind you. Someone was following you. You didn’t need to turn and look thought. The sound of the footsteps, his smell, everything about him swirling around inside your very confused mind. 

You opened the freezer and didn’t realize how much you needed the relief of a cool breeze. Standing there with the door open for a moment after grabbing the tub of ice cream felt incredible.  

“Hey,” Eddie’s voice melted your insides. It sounded so soft and comforting, “Are you alright?”

You didn’t want to look at him for fear that just by making eye contact he would somehow know what you had wanted to do. Instead, you chuckled awkwardly and played it off, “Guess I’m just more tired than I thought.”

“No,” Eddie saw right through you, “I’ve seen you tired after a long day. That’s not what this is. Come here.”

Your mind and body were incapable of disobeying him. Even if you hadn’t wanted to, you turned on his command. Closing the freezer door and keeping your eyes locked with his feet. 

He touched your forehead. Eddie had never touched you before. All the nights you spent wondering what the tips of his fingers felt like finally answered. They were calloused from playing guitar, the palm of his hand rough, most likely from his job. But nothing had ever felt more natural. It was fleeting thought because he pulled back already. 

“Jesus Christ you’re burning up,” He went to the bathroom and returned the thermometer, “Holy shit 102?” He called for Robin. 

She came running and you vaguely heard him telling her to go get medicine from the bathroom. He lifted your chin, “You are taking medicine and going right to bed. Do you understand me? No work or class tomorrow for you either.”

“But–”

“I think you should listen to him,” Robin said as she returned followed by Chrissy and Steve to check on you. 

Standing became a labor. You braced yourself against the counter but Eddie caught you and lifted you into his arms. Robin opened the door for him as he carried you to your bed. Everything was starting to blur together. Somehow they made you take the medicine. You’re pretty sure Robin helped you change into some pajamas before you passed out on top of the comforter. That night you had your first dream of Eddie.

The next morning… afternoon? You weren’t sure until you blinked your eyes open. You felt awful. Your skin felt like it was on fire. If you were still running a fever that was not a sign. As soon as you summoned enough strength you ripped all your clothes off only to be horrified by what you felt on the bed beneath you. Your underwear, shorts and the top of the comforter were soaked. You brought your wet hand up to your face to inspect the source.

“Is that?” you spoke to the emptiness, “Slick?”

It should have been impossible. Everything you knew about biology was being thrown out the window and discarded to the wayside. Nothing made sense anymore. You had been and would always be a beta. And yet– your new and now ever present instincts told you otherwise. You were in heat. 

Grasping at the shred of rationality that you regained, you tried to remember everything you’ve ever learned about heats. You knew a few things for certain. One, it was only a matter of time because you were lost to your desires and unable to think about anything except mating. Two, you needed food so that you didn’t have to leave your room again until it subsided. Last? Only omegas experience heats which means that only an alpha would truly make you feel better. 

Tossing your wet clothing to the ground you wobbled naked like a newborn fawn towards your bedroom door. Dripping slick against your bare inner thighs as you tried to walk. You made it to the kitchen where, with fervent desperation, you dug through the cabinets for anything you could bring back with you. Then you went to Eddie’s room and without a second of hesitation opened the door. That was a horrible idea.

Where only the night before was just the scent of Eddie, now your brain was able to recognize it for what it was. Alpha.

Your knees buckled. It’s a miracle you didn’t fall over. Another rush of slick dripped from your aching hole. You didn’t have the luxury of considering whether he’d be upset that you were borrowing his clothes. You grabbed his leather jacket that he always wore outside of work from the bed and the few shirts that littered the floor. You could feel the fever returning. You needed to get back to your room. 

—

Eddie didn’t want to leave you that morning. He peeked inside your bedroom before heading to work and you were sound asleep.

Robin had taken care of your obligations for you. She called your work and emailed your professors saying you’d be out for a few days with a fever.

Eddie knew he should just go back home because he wasn’t much use here today anyways. He’d already made a ton of mistakes thanks to his distracted brain.

“Munson!” Murray called to him from the office, “Come here boy!”

“Shit,” he tossed the rag in his hand and readied himself for an ass chewing.

Murray looked up from the desk, “What’s wrong with you today? You handed me an order form for the wrong part. You charged someone triple for a simple oil change and now I just watched you checking the engine on a car that was brought in for headlight repair.”

“Sorry sir, my roommate’s pretty sick right now and I guess I’m just a little worried about her,” a little worried was an understatement. Eddie was panicking that you, the absolute divine love and light of his life, were going to die in his absence.

He sighed, “Just go. Before I change my mind.”

Eddie tore at the buttons on his coveralls and nearly tripped trying to walk and take them off at the same time, “Thanks Murray!”

“You owe me!” was the last thing Eddie heard before he ran out.

He kicked the stand up on his motorcycle and got quite a few stares from people on the street and he hauled ass back to the apartment. 

Normally he’d take the elevator up to your fourth floor apartment but in his mind his feet were faster and they’d carry him to you sooner. He was so focused on checking that you were still ok that he didn’t even feel winded after running up four flights of stairs. 

He fumbled with his keys as he walked down the hallway. Then it hit him. He dropped the keys. They clattered loudly to his feet. He was still several doors down from yours and he could already smell it. He scrambled to pick them up and ran down the hallway. 

His suspicions were confirmed as soon as he turned the key. That same sweetness that had greeted him everyday since the first time he opened that door to your smiling face, suffocated him. Though now it was a little different. It was sweeter. More you. Something he’d only ever dreamed of. An omega.

It got stronger with every step he took towards your room. He swallowed and failed to will away the hardness growing in his pants. All his hopes and dreams were answered when he pushed his way into your room. There on the bed in a very haphazardly constructed nest, naked, clinging to his jacket, surrounded by his clothes, and your brown stuffed bear, was you.

He inhaled deeply and could practically feel his pupils dilate with lust. You smelled so fucking good. He took another step and spoke quietly trying not to startle you, “Hey sweetheart.” 

—

It hurt so bad. The ache between your thighs only worsened as you curled into the small nest you’d surrounded yourself with. The underwear you’d stolen from Eddie lost its scent long ago but you still pulled it out and threw it in the pile. The few items you were able to grab from his room were a mere wooden board in the dam against the rushing river that threatened to drown you at any moment.

You didn’t hear the front door open.

Your senses became more clouded with each passing minute. You clung for dear life to Eddie’s leather jacket but it betrayed you as it started to cling back now that it was damp with your sweat.

The click of your bedroom door knob alerted you and brought you back. Maybe it wasn’t the door. Maybe it was the smell or the sound of his voice as he spoke to you. You lifted your head and couldn’t stop the tears when you saw Eddie standing there at the foot of your bed.

“A-alpha? It hurts,” 

Something awoke within Eddie. The deepest part of himself he’d never been able to fully satisfy. All those ruts spent uselessly humping into his hand or a pillow. “Again,” He growled, “Say it again little one!”

Your eyes pleaded with him as you whined, “A-alpha?” You pressed the jacked to your chest. How was he here? He was supposed to be working. Your fever must have taken over you and you were starting to hallucinate, “F-fuck, alpha, need you. Are you really here?”

The bed shifted, “I know, I know. I’m here now, sweet omega. I’m here.” He laid behind you and wrapped his long arms around you. “‘m so sorry I left sweetheart. I’m not going anywhere now.”

His presence eased the ache a bit. He rubbed your neck with his hand and whispered in your ear, “You smell so good, could smell you from the hallway.”

He felt you shudder with panic, “R-really?”

“Shh! No, don't worry. I locked the door and only other alphas or omegas would be able to smell it,” he leaned in closer, “Can I kiss you? It might help you feel better.”

You nodded but didn’t feel anything on your lips. He kissed your neck. Sparks of pure pleasure shot through your body. You whimpered helpless against the feeling, “Fuck more Eddie! More! Kiss me more, please!”

He couldn’t deny that his heart had wanted to hear those words since he first laid eyes on you but he knew it was just the heat talking. He also knew if he started he wouldn’t be able to stop, “I want to more than you know princess but, I don’t want you to hate me when you're more lucid.”

His kiss had breathed new life into you and gave you the energy to turn to face him, “I’d never hate you Eddie.” You reached into the piled up fabric that you had built up around you and pulled out the green plaid boxers, “D’you lose something?” you could feel your speech slurring.

“D-did you take my underwear?” his fingers curled and tickled against you lightly drawing out little giggles.

You grinned up at him with glassy eyes, “Sure did. Sniffed ‘em too.”

His palm came to rest on your hip and he ran his fingers up the curve of your waist. Then back down again. Savoring every dip, ridge, and shape your body created as it lay before him, “Did they help you feel better?”

“Nuh uh,” he was misunderstanding, “I took these a while ago. So see? Wouldn’t hate you. Want you.”

He kissed you again, on the lips this time, “I want you too. Shit, you taste so good. I wonder how you taste other places.”

He pressed his elbow up, giving him leverage to sit up and tear his shirt off. Next he was up hovering over you on his knees. You watched him, taking in every single one of his movements. He unzipped his pants and slid them down his hips. His thick length was barely contained by the fabric of his boxers. He was less than graceful as he shook them off. 

He straddled your legs and lowered himself towards your neck again, so close to your skin that his chest grazed your exposed nipples as he turned you to rest on your back beneath him. His mouth was in your ear whispering, “I can see it in your eyes sweetheart, the heat is getting worse. Can you tell me what you need before that smart ass brain of yours is just mush, begging for my knot?”

“F-fuck me Eddie,” you looked up at him and knew even in your current state that your words had affected him. “P-please.”

“That’s all I needed to hear sweetheart,” he kissed you again. First on the lips. Devouring your moans, wet noises growing as you felt yourself drooling into him because of how good he tasted. Your slick lips gliding against his. He moved lower onto your neck and kissed the crook just above your shoulder, “This might be a little sensitive here but I promise it’ll feel good.” He sucked on your skin and in that instant you were writhing.

“Ah! A-alpha,” somewhere in the deep recesses of your mind you knew that he was sucking on the spot that both of your latent instincts told you was where he should bite down and bond himself to you. Where if he gave into his desires and bit down just a little harder you’d forever be his and only his. Bearing his mating mark for the world to see. As he continued sucking with just his lips and licking with his tongue that was suddenly all you ever wanted, “Mate me alpha! All yours, please!” 

He puffed out his chest. His shoulders flexed. The muscles in his back tightened as he growled again into your neck. Straining to fight off every instinct that told him to give you what you wanted. His hand gripped the wooden frame of your bed so tightly you heard the wood begin to splinter and crack. “Maybe after your heat sweetheart. Such a good girl, my sweet little omega, all these big new feelings. Don’t you worry, I’ll take care of you.”

Throwing your head back you let the dam break, “N-need your knot alpha, Hurts. Make it stop.”

“You’re not quite ready for my knot yet baby. Gotta make sure I don’t hurt you.”

But you were an omega? That’s literally what your body was made for, why couldn’t you take him? First he wouldn’t mate you and now he won’t knot you? Were you a bad omega? He sensed your distress in the subtle change in your scent. He buried his face into your neck again, surrounding you with himself. 

“You’re not bad! No no,” you didn’t even realize you’d said that out loud. He continued to soothe you, “It's just…I’ve never knotted anyone before and I don’t want to hurt you.”

You brought your hands up to his chest and touched him everywhere your fingers could reach, “Won’t hurt me. I know. Too gentle.” 

You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him down on top of you. The weight of his body pressing into nearly every surface of your skin was intoxicating. Grounding you with his scent and his very presence. You’d pulled him into the perfect position to nuzzle into his neck and hair, kissing the same spot that he has just assaulted on you with his tongue. A warm feeling bubbled in your gut. This was different from the warmth of the heat. Then a sound hit both of your ears.

A sound that gave both of you delighted pause. The little noise that escaped your throat was somewhere between a whimper and a moan but something so uniquely omega. Eddie had never heard a more beautiful sound. You were purring. 

He let you keep going but whispered into your ear, “You’re fucking perfect you know that?” you purred louder, “I’m going to make you come with my fingers and then I’ll give you my knot, ok?”

“Yes alpha! Thank you,” you whined as he pulled away but his hands never stopped touching you. He made his way down to the drenched area between your thighs.

“You look so beautiful for me sweetheart, you’re fucking soaked,” he moaned as his fingers began toying with your wetness and dipping in between the folds of your pussy. You encouraged him with all the moans and whines he could ever hope to hear. As soon as he deemed you thoroughly worked up, he finally slipped a finger in, quickly followed by another. They worked together pumping in and out fluidly, curling inside you, pressing all the right buttons. You wanted to thank him but all that would come out was broken bits and pieces of alpha and his name. 

His hair brushed lightly against your inner thighs, sending shivers through your core as he lowered his head down. He spoke with a low hum right into your entrance, “You’re close. I can feel it. Let go for me sweet omega. I’ll take good care of you.”

One more curl of his fingers hitting that delicious soft spongy spot inside you had you screaming and convulsing as slick rushed out into his hand and surely getting some on his face. His fingers pulled out and were replaced with something wet and soft. You could feel his nose nudging at your aching clit as he licked up all your wetness with his tongue. It slid up from the hole and flicked your clit over and over again causing the muscles in your calf to twitch.

“K-knot alpha! Knot please, ‘m ready. So empty, hurts!”

He sucked on your clit before pulling away and lifted to release his throbbing cock from his boxers. You looked up at it, marveling at how impressive his length looked. The tip swollen and aching for you just as you ached for him. The shaft veins pulsed as he pumped himself with his wet hand, covering it in your scent and juices. The base just barely began to flare out as his knot already started to swell. He lined up the tip with your begging cunt and teased you as much as his self control would allow before slowly and carefully pressing all the way inside.

You cried out for him, “So good! More, more, more! Move alpha please!”

He couldn’t hold back anymore. Feeling his cock sheathed inside his omega’s pussy was too much. He began fucking into you with reckless abandon, each thrust hitting deep within your body, catching ever so slightly as his knot continued to swell. He grunted loudly, “Fuck! “M’gonna fill you up so good little omega. Gonna breed this beautiful pussy,” his instincts were now fully in control. His mind became almost as clouded as yours with nothing but want and desire to fulfill the purpose of your heat, “You’ll look so good knocked up sweetheart. Tits all big and heavy. My omega, mine!” 

You echoed him, “Yours alpha! All yours! Breed me, wanna carry your baby! Please, please please,” you cries became so desperate and emotional as you begged and pleaded for him to give you something you’d wanted as long as you could remember. Tears fell from your tired eyes, “Make me a mommy alpha!”

“Yeah?” he looked down at you. Beads of sweat from his constant thrusting formed on his forehead. His bangs curled and swooshed out in every direction, “Beg for my knot again omega, tell me how much you want it!”

Your body was jostling up and down from his thick cock fucking into you harder and harder. Your senses became overwhelmed with the feeling of your alpha’s cock, his scent, his words, his love all around you. You could feel how much bigger his knot had gotten, your voice was wrecked, “Knot alpha, need it, knot me!”

Eddie came with a loud growl. You’d never felt so full. Your walls pulsated around him as you came again. He slammed his knot deep inside you, locking you together with him, forming a connection that as you floated down from your orgasm fully took shape in your mind.

“Eddie?” you looked into his warm brown eyes, “Th-thank–”

“Shh, we can talk later baby. Rest while you can,” he held a finger to your lips, “Once my knot goes down I’ll get you some water and something to eat. You’ll need it again soon so we both need to rest.”

Being locked together with him felt so right but it limited your movement. Twisting your torso you looked around the nest for the box of granola bars you’d grabbed earlier, “I,” words were still hard and your breath was labored, “box here somewhere.”

He looked around and spotted the corner of the box on the floor. He pictured what you must have done when you realized what was happening to you, knowing what you’d need, “You did such a good job. Now it’s my turn, we’ve got a long few days ahead of us. My first rut lasted three days.”

You chuckled, eyes closed, a blissful fucked out smile on your lips, “W-we might need more food.”

“I’m not leaving you again, I’ll have Rob drop some stuff off.”

You didn’t talk anymore after that. In fact you fell asleep with his knot still inside you. He kissed your forehead before pulling out when it finally went down, “Sleep my little omega.” He left the nest just long enough to text Robin and his boss, updating them and then curled up behind you, rubbing his face into your neck again. Picturing how good your throat would look with his mating mark on it before falling asleep beside you.

[jaskierx]

I wonder if the people crying and wailing over the billboard believe in funding arts programs for schools, or if they think students should only get to take 'practical' courses . . . .

right like how far does it go? am i allowed to give money to the relief fund for ukraine or sudan or the congo or anywhere other than palestine that’s in a state of crisis?

am i allowed to give money to charities that support people who are ill but not dying? or ones that support people that are poor but not homeless?

am i allowed to make my own life slightly more comfortable? am i allowed to take a bath instead of a shower even though it costs more in hot water? am i allowed to buy the £2 pasta sauce instead of the 80p pasta sauce because it tastes nicer? should i stop paying for my meds since i don’t need them to stay alive, just to stay comfortable?

am i allowed to buy a drink at the pub on my friend’s birthday? am i allowed to buy a christmas present for my mum?

if my cat gets sick am i allowed to pay for his treatment? shit, am i even allowed to buy food for him? he’s not a person. am i meant to sell him? am i meant to sell everything else i own as well if i don’t strictly need it?

am i allowed to heat my flat instead of wearing 5 layers? am i allowed to keep my fridge plugged in even though i could stop eating refrigerated food and save money on electricity? should i be keeping my lights off?

it’s absolutely ridiculous to blame all the world’s ills on ordinary people spending small amounts of money in ways you think are frivolous while you completely ignore billionaires and corporations. it’s like when people try to claim that climate change would be solved if we all recycled more even though most emissions come from the same 10 companies.

[positivelyqueer]

the zine you reblogged "helping your friends who sometimes wanna die maybe not die" has changed my life, seriously, i'd compare reading it to learning that queer people exist. thank you!

I’m really really glad. Thank you for sharing this with me.

I’m not the most well read on this topic (it’s one part former med student, one part psych patient, one part zines from psych survivors and others.) But harm reduction, anti-carceral crisis support and community supports are very dear and important to me.

we’re all here to look out for each other and form community.

[maxdibert]

What does your daily routine consist of?

I wake up at 6:45 am. I want to die. I check my phone until about 7:15 am because I need between 20 minutes and half an hour for my brain to decide it can be 1% functional. I force myself to get up. I still want to die. I take my meds because I have ADHD and a diagnosed anxiety disorder, so I need the pills to keep myself from shooting myself, you know. I usually shower at night because if I shower in the morning, I waste too much time since my timeline management is awful, so I get dressed, pack my bag, and head to work. I try to get on the metro, which feels like a very complicated mission at 8 am when I arrive—it’s like having to push through people and fight aggressively retiring ladies. I end up crammed into the car like a sardine between people who want to die and university students who also want to die but not as much because they can still be happy until they graduate and real hell begins. I get to the office, make myself a matcha latte because I can’t drink coffee as caffeine wrecks me. I have it with oat milk because I’m lactose intolerant, thanks. The first thing we do every day at 9 am is a meeting with the bosses, the psychology team, and the social workers to review the day’s plan. Then it depends on the week—some weeks I’m almost always at the office reviewing paperwork and the "boys" (the users of the organization I work for) come here, other weeks I go to supervised homes to interview them, and other weeks I have trials or hearings at court and spend the day out.

On Fridays, we have a general team meeting to talk about the cases of the people we manage, how they’re progressing, and unresolved matters. The social caregivers are also there; they work directly with them and give us feedback on the week, basically telling us about all the rules they’ve broken because they literally behave like teenagers who think their parents don’t notice their messes—but we do. And well, after that, we have some sessions where the users come in, and we run a progress check and evaluation with them. Not with all of them, just one or two each week.

My schedule is from 9 am to 6 pm, and there are days when I end up with a horrible migraine, days when I end up at the bar drinking to forget, days when I go straight home exhausted and can only watch True Crime on TV to stop thinking, and days when I’m in a reasonably good mood, and then I write my fanfiction, which I’ve committed to updating regularly as an exercise to work on my ADHD and the consistency it takes from me.

Every two weeks, I have therapy, and occasionally I go out with some guy I met on Tinder or during a night out, and well, not much else.

The good thing about days when I’m in the office and have lots of meetings is that most of them are on Zoom, so I can ditch all the tools my psychiatrist and therapist have given me to stay focused and answer questions like this while having five or six minimized faces on the screen talking about things I half-listen to because I’m incapable of paying attention to non-face-to-face conversations for more than 10 minutes. Fortunately, my boss is very happy with me because I get the "boys" everything they need and we share the same terrible rage when someone tries to harm the "boys" so he acts like he doesn’t notice when I dissociate or get distracted.

And that’s my life, the normal routine of a young adult with a teenage soul immersed in the social precariousness of depressing adulthood, already starting to experience an early 30s crisis.

[hournites]

JSA #1 Outtake

Note: This is the start of a series of oneshots exploring Rick and Beth’s dynamic in Jeff Lemire’s new JSA run. Meaning, Rick, Beth, Jennie, Todd and Yolanda are adult members while Courtney and Jakeem are still teens.

~.~

It’d been a few months. 

Beth was…doing okay. She’d never been excellent with personal change, only others’ crises. No one expected her to thrive through this. And, at one point, a crisis was no longer one. 

She wrestled with this second chance at life. Sometimes quietly, looking a moment too long at her reflection, feeling cosmically misplaced. Other times, this chasm felt too loud. Nightmares that woke her with cold sweats and screams. Unexplained shortness with her patients, especially the self-sacrificial ones not understanding they took their lives for granted. Beth was always at war with the unfair guilt that lingered in the back of her mind.

The JSA replaced her with a student she used to know. Her parents grew bitter and old. Old enough to be buried in the same plot she vanished from. Her brothers grew apart without their sister. Matthew wasted away to heroin abuse while Mark succumbed to his weak heart. Luke blew up in the army. And young John…John’s demise was too painful to think about. His story was just a blot of ink on a faded Orangeburg newspaper. 

Her family deserved to be grieved by her. All of them. But how could she? She’d barely begun to grieve her old self. 

Yolanda understood, though. And that was a blessing. Truly, a miracle. Who of death’s few victors could say they were brought back not alone? Another person who felt it all and truly got it. A companion who carried the same double-edged sword in her back pocket, cycling between euphoric joie de vivre and crippling bouts of existential depression. 

Desire comforted her on days that felt like too much. Like pauses to blink back tears of gratitude over the simple pleasure of the sun shining on her face again. There were even days she forgot she wasn’t supposed to be alive. Hopefully, somehow, that feeling might stick. 

As long as evil’s handprint still held onto the world, there would be a place for her at work. Maybe that’s what held Beth and Yolanda together for so long. Their deaths might’ve felt senseless, but their extended lives were purposeful. Yolanda’s renewed sense of justice was staggering, always near ravenous for a fight. 

As for Beth, New York needed a meta-specialist. 

Shift work always suited her. Weeks blurred by. JSA’s roster required her assistance. Jen practically begged Beth to return to medicine and mentoring as soon as they’d cleared her fit to return. The older members must’ve exaggerated her bedside manner because even Superman brought his son to her clinic’s door. 

Beth learned to adapt, not day to day but disaster to disaster. That might not be any better than Yolanda’s fight-first, feel-later attitude, but it’s what worked so far. 

~.~ 

Jakeem’s heart monitor beeped steadily, reassuring Beth she had not yet failed him. The goggles illuminated what she already knew for certain by touch and feel; his weak body swimming in adult-sized sheets and the pallor in his face mentioned by every visitor. It troubled Beth enough as a friend and a teammate, nevermind his doctor. She couldn’t lose Jakeem. He reminded her too much of John.

“He looks better than yesterday.”

Beth tensed, clipboard tight in hand. It didn’t take a backwards glance or fancy goggles to guess who that was. She knew that voice anywhere. Even now. Older, deeper, more self-assured. He leaned against the doorframe with his arms crossed, observing her work in a tee with jeans and that old hourglass slung around his neck. He was the man she’d avoided as much as she could. The one Jen placed beside her at the round table as though that might help her.

“I took a peek when you were having lunch,” he filled in, addressing the elephant in the room. Not only that she hadn’t seen him in her med lab the day before—She’d never seen him here, ever. She wondered how often he had been in, and why. If this room was a joy or a ghost. Technology and medicine has changed since she last worked here. The world had changed…Rick had earned his edges. Somber, serious. No longer young. Beth, where was she? Still floundering, still adjusting, still wearing the goggles like a mask. 

Sometimes, when she needed a break, she’d find a wall and let her legs give out, just like old hospital days before the explosion. The break-room. A closet. Dr. McNider’s office. A stall in the bathroom. For a bleak desperate minute to catch her breath or sleep between crises. Now, that wasn’t enough. More times than not Beth found her face tipped towards fluorescent hospital lights, sliding the green goggles from her eyes, and numbing out three more working senses. That’s when her fingers would crawl up her neck, making sense of the impossible and searching for the scar that should be there, would be there, if she still lived in a grave.

Rick’s solid frame filled the leather seat beside the cot. He held the boy’s hand like he loved him.

Dread sunk into Beth’s stomach, coming back to herself. She let the fingertips at her neck slide to her side as though they were never there. Of course Rick loved Jakeem. The boy’s health was what brought him here to her clinic, breaking their unspoken agreement. Jakeem didn’t have parents to look after him like Stargirl did. Without the JSA, he’d be here alone.

“Well, he’s not improving. And if he dies, it’ll be my fault.”

“He won’t die,” Rick said. They might’ve been the harshest words he’d said to her in nearly ten years. Beth welcomed it—She’d rather this over indifference. 

“How do you know?” 

“You’d never let that happen.” 

Jen pretty much said the same, but Rick’s assurance brought on a thicker wave of anxiety. How many times had she brought Rick back from the brink of death? Too many to count. Too many nights she’d spent debating with herself about how to keep him both sane and healthy. Strong and independent from the drug his dad’s parting wish was to save him from. 

“You have a lot of nerve saying that to me.”

“What?” 

“You know.” Beth swallowed hard. It was never supposed to come out like this. Certainly not in this accusing-tone she’s whipped up as that haunting horror creeped up again. Cruel was how it felt to find out through old pictures. Beth roaming the brownstone, catching up on old JSA team composites. She’d walked along the framed pictures in the grand hall and sought out his face in the crowd. Not on purpose but by habit. The year before she died, when his arm wrapped around her waist and Yolanda’s claw tips touched his shoulder. The year after, his eyes sunken and mouth tight, no smile, only a third of the equation with both women missing on each side. The year next came after, the photograph glossy in mahogany and Beth convinced her eyes played a terrible trick. Rick stood, almost skeletal, leaning against the round table, weakened. The next year Rick was gone altogether. Hourman’s name off the membership list. “I have your oncologist’s file.” 

“Oh,” he said. He glanced at her, finally pulling his eyes from Jakeem. “Wait, what? No. You don’t think…” When she didn’t give him words, he shook his head hard. “Beth, that wasn’t your fault.” 

“Wasn’t it?” she asked lightly. “I don’t recall anyone else supplying you with untested drug patches.”

“I don’t recall anyone else being as adamant to me that I was an addict,” he argued, almost sarcastic. “I was responsible for my own cancer.”

“God. Don’t say that.” Beth bit out, turning from him. Her parents would’ve blanched at her using the Lord’s name in vain but she hadn’t felt very close to the Lord these days. “But, I…” 

But you…what? You could have prevented it? Is it your fault he got that sick? That you died before you could help him? Or are you mad there was a chance he could have joined you in the ground? Both of you starting over at the click of Jakeem’s pen… 

“Besides,” he continued gently when her words dried up. “That was a very long time ago.”

“No, not really.” Beth wet her lips. “Not for me.”

Healing was all Beth had to be sure of at the moment. The only real merit for her place and home here was how desperately metahuman medicine was needed. It’s what got her through today and tomorrow. And if she failed this boy and all who loved him she was scared she’d never bounce back. 

“So,” she said at last. “I think we can agree to disagree that I’m no miracle-worker.” 

“Fine.” Rick took Jakeem’s hands in his again. Gripping the boy like a lifeline. Beth set the clipboard down and pressed her knuckles against Jakeem’s bed. Finally, she let herself look at Rick. Really look at him beyond a clinical manner. Fit, healthy, and bodily strong. Distracting. She wouldn’t let her eyes linger before. Not in front of Jesse or their friends. She’d never forgive herself if she gave Jesse real reason for worry. So she missed the not-quite-right eyes and the heavy bags beneath them. The foot that tapped too restlessly on the floor without Miraclo in his bloodstream.

“Why are you here, Rick?”

“I don’t know.” He wrung his hands. “Can’t I just be allowed to sit?”

Courtney bustled in, cupping a hand over the left side of her face, dressed in a grey hoodie over her Stargirl suit. She shrugged her school bag off her shoulder, dumping it at the door of the clinic. The cosmic staff warbled in her free hand. “Hey Dr. Mid-Nite, can you look in my ear? It’s been bugging me all day. Mom thinks I have an infection and doesn’t want me anywhere near my sister until I can get that ruled out. Something about daycare rules.” Rick shared a long sideways glance with Beth as Courtney hopped onto the examination table.

“Hey Rick,” she said. “How’s Jakeem?” 

“Still hanging in there,” he said, softening for the teen. 

“That’s good. Have you been here long?” 

“A bit.” 

Glad for the excuse, Beth pulled on her latex gloves and grabbed the otoscope. “Rick was just leaving.”

Courtney glanced between Rick and Beth, watching closely. Honestly, Beth was screwed if even a teenager could grasp her discomfort. “I’ve never seen you two hang out before.” 

“Hang out?” Rick laughed a little under his breath and stood up to go. “We’ve been doing that since before you were even born.” 

“Have a good evening, Rick.” She tilted Courtney’s face to the left, letting her long hair block the view to the door. Hmm…She felt a little warm. 

“It’s okay, you know,” Courtney said, still perched on the wax paper while Beth sat at her desk, writing out a prescription for antibiotics. “To let him in.” She pinched her thumb and forefinger together. “Just a bit?” 

Beth raised an eyebrow. “Pardon?” 

“I can’t say I’d know how to act in your shoes, either. It must be really hard.” 

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about, Courtney.” 

The teen leaned back against the med cot, sighing at the ceiling. “Jakeem asked Rick about it last week before Kobra. Apparently, Rick misses you. He just wants to be friends again. ” 

“It’s not that simple.” Beth scoffed as a telling flush threatened to spread. Was her rollercoaster life the topic of all the teens’ gossip? “Jakeem is known to be a romantic of sorts, isn’t he? 

“Well, sure. But I don’t think he was wrong about this. Why can’t you two be friends?”

“We are friends.”

Courtney crossed her arms over her chest. “You kicked him out of the room.”

 “To examine a patient.” 

The girl stared at her, unsatisfied–Beth folded. 

“We’re just…There are boundaries, Courtney. I’m still lost in the past, not caught up with the present. I need space, especially where and when I work. That’s all.”

“So how do you expect to get over him, then? If you’ll never talk about it?” 

Tired, Beth snapped her fingers for Courtney to jump down, lucky she liked this girl enough not to raise her voice at her. “You have a fever, Miss Stargirl.” She picked up the backpack and handed over the slip of paper. “I think it’s time to go home.”

[nomsfaultau]

Went through my inbox for the past 4 days, figured out which ones are verified, donated to those I could. If you send an ask with proof of donation I can do doodle or drabble requests. Please help these poor Palestinians trying to save themselves and their families. Donating a little goes a long way for boosting the visibility of a campaign.

Vetted--to my knowledge, looking for rb and spread sheets from known vetters. Also by association.

Habib and their 4 kids trying to get out of Gaza https://www.gofundme.com/f/b3pgr-help-save-my-childrens-lives?attribution_id=sl:3e08d450-cb3a-4b95-98a1-ba1b128acf73

Noureddine trying to get his babies vaccinated and safe, verified by 90 ghost and roadimusprime. https://www.gofundme.com/f/donate-to-help-nour-and-his-family-escape-the-war-in-gaza

Ahmed is verified by 90 ghost and association, and their kid Walaa has diabetes https://www.gofundme.com/f/reunite-us-with-our-beloved-4-kids-stuck-in-gaza

Safaa has been by multiple sources, trying to get husband and baby out. https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-safaas-quest-to-get-her-family-to-safety?lang=en_US

Falestine and her family, vetted by el shab hussein and nabulsi https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-palestine-and-family-survive-the-gaza-crisis?attribution_id=sl:27efd885-d33d-4200-8eb1-c538d2b5a596

Mohammed Shamia and his large family, vetted by el shab hussein and nabulsi https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-a-med-student-his-family-evacuate-to-safety?lang=en_US

Hashem Al-Shawish and their 8 family members, verified by 90 ghost according to the notes https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-baby-omar-and-his-family-survive

Eman is 17 and is trying to get her and her mother out, vetted by multiple sources https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-eman-and-her-mother-evacuate-for-urgent-medical-treatme?attribution_id=sl:bf50c6a7-abbb-451b-a03b-414b9c0fd286

Heba Al-Anqar is a university student trying to get their family out of Gaza. Vetted by 90 ghost https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-heba-and-his-family-to-survive-their-life?attribution_id=sl:a765f7a3-db3e-4356-98b3-52ac21332aa9

Mohammed Hijazi, who is very close to having enough to save him and his parents. Verified by paper Mario wiki https://www.gofundme.com/f/save-mohamed-and-his-elderly-parents-from-genocide

Abed Rahman El-Shaer, trying to get basic needs for his family. Verrified by el shab hussein. https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-abeds-family-survive-and-escape-war

Israa Al-Tawel trying to get her family out, vetted by association https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-israa-and-her-children-to-evacuate-gaza

Amina Yasser and her children, has had 7 total donations. Vetted by Association. https://www.gofundme.com/f/helpaminayasserandchildren

Maryam and her family. Vetted by Association. https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-my-children-to-evacuat-gaza?attribution_id=sl:7f807785-2f9b-48ad-a07a-c52f1de03a56

Alaa trying to save her daughter, close to her 5k goal. Vetted by Association. https://www.gofundme.com/f/save-my-daughter-to-leave-gaza?attribution_id=sl:fdf7343e-4094-45bc-b9f5-966a1c5da1e6

Not verified-- to my knowledge; I tried to check notes and blog for ones that looked legitimate but hadn't the luck of getting verified.

Ali's Family, very little donations https://www.gofundme.com/f/t2du3-helping-my-family-get-out-of-gaza?lang=en_US

Shaima and Ibrahim, they are not vetted, reverse image search clear according to notes https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-shaimas-family-get-out-of-gaza?attribution_id=sl:21ce6984-0b87-4420-81a7-f2fc4933584f

Najah Al-Haila and their husband and four children, not vetted but donation protected according to notes https://www.gofundme.com/f/jtrbdq-help-us-to-survive?attribution_id=sl:5ceac81f-397e-4a1b-92bf-fe3507a3e5c8&lang=de_DE

[maurastierney]

*If you’re queer and here for ER (or here and queer for ER) feel free to join us on Discord

Poll for seasons 6-10 can be found here

Poll for seasons 11-15 can be found here

[autistichanseo]

Please take a minute to read our story in Gaza, after I lost my home for the third time, we lost our work, and we are in a tragic situation.

This sums up my daughter's situation with her four siblings. She cannot continue living without your help. Donate, share the story and send it to your friends. Any small amount helps save my children's lives, share now on your account.

https://www.tumblr.com/monashamali/755533032132395008/donate-to-help-the-munna-tashmali-family-rebuild?source=share

The campaign has been verified by Nabulsi

https://www.tumblr.com/nabulsi/754393532315353089/donate-to-help-the-munna-tashmali-family-rebuild

I keep getting Palestinians reaching out to me to post their stories and help them reach their goals, so I’m going to make a thread I’ll add to of different Gofundme’s to donate to (that have verification):

Please, if you have the means to, donate, or if not spread these stories. Its so so important we try to help as many Palestinians as we can as this genocide has left many without food, shelter, clean water, clothes, education, and many have lost their income and their own family members.

• monashamali (their account wouldn’t come up for some reason but the gofundme is in this post also, vetted by @90-ghost)

• @yasermohammad (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/my-uncle-and-his-children-rebuild-their-life, vetted by @/90-ghost)

• @ahmeadhilles (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/helping-the-helles-family-achieve-a-better-future, vetted by @/90-ghost)

• @asmaamajed2 (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/8wewmz-help-asmaa-to-continue-school-outside-of-gaza, vetted by @okaysign and @/90-ghost)

• @safaakhatib (gofundme: https://gofund.me/67b7fd56, vetted here)

• @mohammed-665 (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/znu6m-help-muhammad-and-his-family-live-a-better-life, vetted by @/90-ghost)

• @lina-gaza (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-ayahs-family-escape-gaza-crisis, vetted by association, friends with another account vetted by @/90-ghost)

• @mahmoudkhalafff (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/death-chases-my-family-in-gaza-help-me-save-them, vetted by: @el-shab-hussein, @nabulsi and @riding-with-the-wild-hunt)

• @majedgaza1 (gofundme: https://gofund.me/f489e577, vetted by @/90-ghost)

• @mo-shamia (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-a-med-student-his-family-evacuate-to-safety, vetted by @/nabulsi @/el-shab-hussein)

• @ahmed4palestine (gofundme: https://gofund.me/1d8bb3df, vetted by @/90-ghost)

• @abdmusab (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-musab-and-his-family-survive-this-war-in-gaza-they-nee, vetted by @/90-ghost)

• @yasminsalahmahmoud (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/please-help-us-escape-from-gaza-to-a-safe-place, vetted by association, friends with another account vetted by @/90-ghost)

• @maha-sh18 (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-mohammed-his-family-to-safety, vetted by @/el-shab-hussein @/90-ghost @/nabulsi)

• @maysaayahya85 (gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/y6jxn-donate-to-help-us-scape-death-from-gaza, vetted by association, cousin of friend of account vetted by @/el-shab-hussein and @/nabulsi)

This list will be updated.