#meanwhile at thanksgiving

[lovelanguageisolate]

I'm blocking the kettle.

@regexkind: I need to get by you to reach the boiling machine.

me (who heard "boyling" instead of "boiling"): I've seen a security hologram of Anakin...killing boylings.

[enidtendo64]

the ‘Shauna gets Yolked’ saga

[notbecauseofvictories]

it's so interesting talking to and around my father, because personality-wise we are extremely similar (so much so that sometimes I'll say things, then my mother will go quiet and respond...you know, you sounded just like your father) but I grew up as a woman, and he grew up as a man, and that does that make an appreciable difference.

[colin-crossing]

i learned to bake pies this summer cause i have this super fucking lame fantasy in my mind where my (hypothetical) boyfriend invites me to a thanksgiving and everyone is eating the pie and they are like "damn this pie is so good who brought it" and then my hypo-boyfriend is like "colin made it!" and then everyone there starts glowing like "wow man! this pie is the best!" and im like : ) and then i start crying cuz i rember this isnt happening and that im in my dorm typing this on my laptop in pajama pants

[moonsavior]

Happy Snowhunt Day! I'm on to you

[uwudonoodle]

Still salty about the time my 17 year old newly married cousin got to sit at the adults table on Thanksgiving, while I was put at the kid's table until I was 26 because I was single.

If you're wondering what it's like growing up religious.

[stabbyfoxandrew]

SOON IT WILL BE THANKSGIVING WHICH WOULD BE GREATLY ENJOYED IN A RESTAURANT EVEN IF IT IS A MAFIA FRONT - @jtl-fics

WIP Wednesday (11/1) | Mafia Front Restaurant AU (Part 42-B)

“Trust me, Stuart is really… odd. He gets jumpy about the randomest things. Neil suddenly becoming a houseplant enthusiast will be less suspicious than a clean patch on the floor.”

“Why don’t we just mop?” Kevin asks. 

“We?” Jean asks, confident that Kevin’s never touched such a cleaning implement.

“Fine, you or Neil.” Kevin says, waving his hand. “Wouldn’t that be the least suspicious thing to do?”

“Perhaps, but this is faster.” Jean says. Sue him if he wants an excuse to spend a bit more alone time with his boyfriend instead of mopping a grungy goddamn floor that Neil mucked up.

It takes almost twenty minutes for Kevin to decide between a Swiss cheese plant and a bird of paradise, but finally they decide on both. One for the ‘restaurant’ and one for the flat. They leave the final call up to Neil, who is baffled when presented with two houseplants.

“I thought you were getting groceries,” he says. “Where the fuck are we going to put that anyhow?”

“In the corner,” Jean says.

“Yeah, the corner,” Kevin repeats, gesturing towards it. Once they get it into its place, Neil makes a face.

"It's going to die immediately." He says.

Jean rolls his eyes. "I've kept you and Kevin alive this long, I can water a goddamned plant."

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[birdyboylassie]

Can someone please tell me why I do my best writing at airports

[menlove]

just saw a guy on tiktok say "there's europeans afoot" when he sees someone posting pics of green bean casserole and I'm literally never going to be able to unhear that

[chartreuxcatz]

Bro some Christians love to act like their faith is so mysterious and misunderstood as if most atheists didn’t grow up in Christian households.

[lordofthecoffee]

[61below]

Y’all I cannot get over how cute these Target dollar spot Christmas trees are. They’re $3 each and they have this clear AB finish, I didn’t even know they lit up til I picked them up!

[dionysus-complex]

so full of anxious energy this week with no good outlet for it

[nopalitosx]

sitting all night at work so it's my time to catch up on tlt posting

[ephemeral-winter]

my mom gets high for medical reasons every couple of weeks and she’s sooooo fun afterwards and so I always try to be over there for dinner that night and well tonight was that night but in addition to ordering Indian food and getting silly with it we had to plan our Thanksgiving day cooking and, I’m not joking, it took her two hours sitting down to prep the thyme for our stuffing and she kept dropping little thyme leaves in the dog’s ears. he’s gonna smell so good tomorrow

[blackmoldmp3]

very funny thing abt my memory is that i clearly remember catching my dad in bed w his girlfriend when i was visiting him as a young kid. under 9 for sure. but i don’t remember how he literally and sincerely tried to gaslight me afterward lmao even when my mom brought it up i was like what. holy shit. it apparently upset me a lot too bc i told my mom something like ‘he keeps saying i was imagining things that didn’t happen but im not lying :(‘ but he failed so miserably at it that i just remember the Act (they were just chilling but i only saw him like four days a month he could’ve waited)

anyway it makes sense that my mom is insane lol imagine being married to this dude for ten years