#meant in the third group of verbs'

[echo-s-land]

French verbs having way too many different possible endings when conjugated but at least they keep their verbal root:

Aller:

[broken-clover]

Analyzing the Naming Conventions in Bugsnax

I already forgot why I was doing this...

So, obviously to anyone who's played the game, one of the notable aspects of Bugsnax's worldbuilding is that Grumpuses all have very distinctly 'inhuman' names. While somewhat silly, they do help emphasize that this game takes place in a different place than ours, with different creatures and culture. However, despite the oddity, when looking over all the name characters there are at least a couple of conventions that pop up somewhat regularly. There's no perfect one method to it, but I still want to analyze the sorts of thought that goes into giving the grumpuses their names because...I can?

Note: I am not a linguist nor any type of language expert. I'm just really autistic

Given Names

Grumpus given names, at least compared to surnames, bear much more of a resemblance to human names. This is where I'd like to start the analysis, with the first group consisting of names that are more obviously based on real names and simply modified. This section, I believe, is the most obviously notable. Filbo, Beffica, Triffany, Shellsy/Shelda, Alegander, Bronica, Eggabell and Elizabert have a name that fits into this category. Chandlo may also fit in this category as well, but he'll be saved for the next section. These are more grounded, but still include a bit of silliness as to fit in with the rest of the world.

The next section is more of a miscellaneous one, names that may derive from existing words, include at last some familiar syllables, or may just be intentionally strange. Wambus, Gramble, Cromdo, Snorpy, Chandlo, and Clumby make up this category. Interestingly, outside of Snorpy's full name being 'Snorpington,' all individuals in this category have two-syllable names.

The last and easily smallest category are names that are simply existing words. As we will see down the line, this is a convention that is usually reserved for surnames, but there are a couple of outliers. This section consists of Floofty and Wiggle. It should be noted, though, that both maintain the sort of playful and whimsical feel that pervades all of the names in the game, so even though they are much simpler, they still fit.

Surnames

Though significantly sillier-sounding, grumpus surnames also generally follow a much more consistent guideline, with every character sans Cromdo fitting into the same fundamental structure.

In every instance of a character we're given, outside of Cromdo with his surname simply being 'Face,' consists of two words put together unhyphenated. That's a bit obvious. Fiddlepie, Troubleham, Wigglebottom, Fizzlebean, Woolbag, etc etc etc. However, there are still some other rules that go along with it. In most instances, the first half are attributive adjectives or adverbs- ie, describing the noun or verb that come after it, or are verbs themselves. The pie is fiddling, the ham is trouble, the bottom is wiggling, the bean is fizzling, the bag is made of wool. Sometimes there is a bit of an overlap- 'fiddle,' for example, can be itself a noun, but also a verb. Based on the consistency between characters, though, it indicates that in most cases it's meant to be interpreted as a descriptor

There are a few exceptions to the descriptor-noun rule, though none are as much an outlier as Cromdo. 'Gigglefunny' is a verb-adjective structure, differing from the others, but still not having a noun precede a verb or a descriptor. The second is 'Winklesnoot,' which can have a couple of explanations. 'Winkle' is a word, referring to a type of snail, making it a noun-noun structure, but it could also be a shortening of 'wrinkle,' with the R removed for the sake of the overall sound, making it a more typical verb-noun instance. The third deviation is 'Clumbernut,' which actually fits the general structure, but stands out in having no real-world descriptive word. 'Clumber' is not a proper word, though based on the '-er,' it can be inferred that it is meant to fulfil a similar role as a descriptor to the 'nut' that follows

(EDIT- upon second glance, 'Clumber' does actually have an origin, being a breed of spaniel dog who derive their name from Clumber Park in Nottinghamshire. I'm not sure if that was intentional, but in this case, it may or may not fit into the naming conventions, with 'Clumber' being a shortened possessive noun, as 'the nut belonging to Clumber' or 'nut from Clumber')

Still, overall, grumpus surnames never have a noun before the descriptor.

General Conventions

A common overall trait with grumpus names is that they tend to stick to very soft rolling 'rounded' sounds in their names. Letters like X, V, K, Z, and D are scarcely used in names if not entirely absent, while ones such as C, S, W, L and vowel sounds appear more frequently. Lots of boubas, not very many Kiki's. Often the letters that get switched/removed from grumpuses with human-adjacent names are the harsher-sounding ones, such as the harsh X being swapped for slighly softer G in 'Alegander' or the sharp Z being replaced with a soft Sh sound in 'Shelda.' Even when rare harsher sounds do appear, they tend to be encapsulated by or immediately followed by a softer sound, such as the D in 'Chandlo' being preceded by a Sh-sounding Ch and followed by a rolling Lo sound, and the Z in 'Elizabert' being followed by a long A. (Lizbert in general has a slightly-sharper sounding name than most of the other characters, possibly intentionally to show her more rugged nature)

This may go along with how grumpuses appear very approachable and friendly, as even with the visible fangs, they have rounded limbs, furry bodies, and heads that resemble muppets. Perhaps in that sense they were intentionally trying to draw inspiration from muppet names, especially ones from Sesame Street, as many of them have names with softer-sounding or rolling syllables, like Elmo, Grover, and Oscar. While actual muppets don't tend to have names as cartoonishly whimsical as 'Filbo Fiddlepie' or 'Floofty Fizzlebean,' it is possible some of the naming conventions could come from the same place. Grumpuses, much like the game they inhabit, come across as cutesy and unserious, with you only learning of the deeper issues as you play further.

[rollsoffthetongue]

BAD ACTORS

Idiomatic Meaning: A person, group, or even a country who purposely and usually repeatedly engages in very bad behavior (such as committing crimes, causing harm to others, or behaving immorally); ill-intentioned, mean, ill-tempered person; individual or entity with a prior criminal conviction.

Literal Meaning:  One or more people with little or no talent, appearing in a theatrical production.

Usage:  Informal spoken general American and British English. Often used in legal cases as well as International Affairs.

Origin: Late 19th - early 20th Century – American English – “Actor” originally meant “A guardian, a steward; a person who acts on behalf of another,” The Oxford English Dictionary says. And though that meaning is considered “obscure” by the OED, doing something for something or someone else is still a part of “acting,” be it in grammar, where the “actor” is a subject performing the action of a verb; in law, where it’s the instigator or part of a legal action; or on the stage. Merriam-Webster’s Unabridged Dictionary traces the first use of “bad actor” to 1901. But an 1889 Sanskrit dictionary also includes a definition of the word with the synonyms “wicked” and “a bad actor.” [Thanks to the Columbia Journalism Review].

Why is this funny?  In the photo, we see three actors on a stage. Apparently, the scene has something to do with a farm because one actor holds a chicken, and another holds a balloon shaped like a cartoon cow. We also see the backs of the audience members’ heads. We can see the audience’s negative reactions. One says the play is terrible, another audience member says it is the worst thing they’ve ever seen, while a third member says it reminds them of some evil politicians. Obviously, these poor performers are bad actors, but they are also reminiscent of evil acting politicians whom we can also dub “bad actors”.

Sample Sentence: Countries which have refused to sign the Non-nuclear  Proliferation Treaty are mostly “bad actors” on the world stage.

[loverandservantoftheahlulbayt]

🍃🕊🍃 Question 11: Divine Tests

Question: If Allah (awj) is omniscient, why does He need to test mankind?

🍃 Brief Answer

As implied by the question, because Allah (awj) is omniscient, the purpose of His tests is not to unveil something hitherto unknown. Rather, the Qur`an and ahadith suggest that these tests serve two purposes. First, they comprise a Divine precedent (sunnah ilahiyyah1) that is in turn based on another Divine precedent that can be termed “universal guidance.”

In particular, Allah (awj) wishes that mankind, by obeying the divine law (shari’ah) and struggling through the various circumstances that he encounters in life, will blossom from potentiality to actuality, and will thereby attain the level of perfection that has been intended for him. One of the terms that is used for such tests in Islamic literature is fitnah (in this sense this term denotes a “crucible”).

Fitnah literally refers to the process of smelting by which gold is purified. In one hadith it is said that people are tested the way gold is tested. The mettle of man is gold ore that is purified in the crucible of Divine tests and guidance. It should be kept in mind though, that in the course of such tests, just as good qualities reach their perfection in the believers, bad qualities also develop to the utmost in disbelievers.

The second purpose that these tests serve is to awaken man from his sleep of heedlessness. The Qur`an explains that one of the purposes of tragedy and disaster is to test man and thereby jar him from his stupor of heedlessness. In a way, tragedy in man’s life serves the same purpose as the ridges that are embossed on some modern motorways and highways that are meant to wake drivers during the monotony of highway driving so they do not fall asleep at the wheel.

There are, in reality, two types of Divine will at play here. One is called the existential will (al-iradah al-takwiniyyah) and the other is called the legislative will (al-iradah al-tashri’iyyah). Allah’s (awj) existential will is that through Divine tests, both believers and disbelievers be able to actualize their good and bad potentials. On the other hand, his legislative will is that only good potentials be actualized.

🍃 Detailed Answer

Divine tests are not designed to unveil something hitherto unknown, since Allah (awj) is omniscient and needs no such unveiling. Rather, they comprise a Divine precedent, that is based on a second Divine precedent called “universal guidance.” By universal guidance, we mean Allah’s (awj) guidance of all creation (whether they be conscious or not), as it relates to man.

To clarify, we must first describe the three types of Divine guidance:

1. One type of guidance is intended only for the most pious people and has been negated from other groups in the following verses of the Qur`an:

“Allah does not guide the wrongdoing ones,”

and

“Allah does not guide the corrupt ones.”

The converse of this kind of guidance is misguidance.

2. Another type of guidance known as “legislative guidance” entails showing someone the path. This kind of guidance addresses both believers and disbelievers, but does not benefit inanimate beings. Examples of this kind of guidance are in the following verses: “We showed him the path while he is either grateful or ungrateful2,” and “As for (the people of) Thamud, we guided them, but they preferred blindness to guidance.”3

3. The third kind of guidance is universal both in terms of the beings who are guided and the resulting guidance and is also called existential guidance. This is the guidance referred to in the following verse:

“Our Sustainer is He who gave everything its existence, and then guided it.”4

This verse implies that Allah’s (awj) universal guidance includes all creation, whether conscious or inanimate. In another verse, the Qur`an states,

“who created and proportioned; who determined and guided.”5

Here, the verb “to determine” (taqdir) entails the facilitation of the appropriate means of a given thing so that it is “guided” to fulfil the purpose for which it was created.

All of creation - whether conscious or inanimate - attains its intended purpose through this third type of existential guidance. However man, who is more than just a physical being living in this material world, requires more than the existential guidance afforded to all creation. He can only attain perfection by choosing his path according to his free will. For this reason, Allah must on the one hand, provide a set of positive and negative commands entailed in the shari’ah (divine law) so that man can choose to either obey or disobey.

On the other hand, Allah (awj) must create “problems” at the individual and societal levels (some of which are caused by human choice and some of which are caused by natural means such as natural disasters) so that man can choose a course of action with respect to these problems. By choosing a course of action with respect to divine law and the aforementioned problems, man actualizes the potential that is hidden within himself, and either proves himself to be worthy of eternal felicity or chastisement. It is for this reason that both the divine law and human tragedy are referred to in Islamic literature by the terms “trial,” “tribulation,” and “test.”

To put it simply, Allah (awj) is like a scientist examining each individual human being. The parameters on which his experiments are based are the shari’ah and human tragedy. Through these two variables, a person’s station with respect to the level of perfection that was intended for him is determined.6

To recapitulate, Divine tests are based on the Divine precedent called universal guidance. Through these tests every person comes to know which abode he will enter: the abode of reward or the abode of chastisement. The Qur`an describes the purpose of these tests in this way: “…so that Allah may purify those who have faith and that He may eradicate the faithless.”7

In the course of repeated tests, the superficial faith and deceitful good qualities of the faithless and the hypocrites are extirpated. Another meaning of the “eradication of the faithless” is mentioned in the verse that says, “the (final) outcome will be in favour of the fear of Allah”8 and in the verse that reads,

“My righteous servants shall inherit the earth.”9

We can recap the positive effects of divine tests in the following two points:

1. They serve to actualize hidden potentials. Imam ‘Ali b. Abi Talib (ع) says: “It is in extreme circumstances that a man’s true mettle shows itself.”10 It is narrated from Imam ‘Ali b. Musa al-Rida (ع) that “People are tested as gold is tested, and they are purified as gold is purified.”11 The word fitnah refers to the process of smelting gold ore. Gold ore is melted so that its impurities float to the surface and are removed. Likewise the essence of man is like gold that Allah (awj) wishes to purify. Meanwhile, the presence of animal-like qualities such as anger and lust pose a major obstacle to his purification. It is for this reason that Divine tests are considered a means for the perfection of mankind.

In the military, soldiers are required to perform strenuous activities to build their strength. Likewise, Divine tests are meant to strengthen man’s inner self. Imam ‘Ali b. Abi Talib (ع) says, “Although Allah knows man better than he knows himself, (He tests him) in order to make manifest those actions by which he earns his reward or punishment.”12

2. They also serve to awaken man from his sleep of heedlessness. Allah (awj) tests man both through tragedy and hardship and by showering him with an abundance of blessings such as power, health, and wealth. Often these blessing deceive a person so much that they threaten to lead to his downfall. Allah (awj) sends tragedy his way, in order to jar him from his stupor so that he can once again discern right from wrong, and so that he remembers that all existence and blessings issue from Allah (awj), whom one should never forget and against whom one should never sin.

Many verses in the Qur`an speak of this aspect of Divine tests13. These verses generally use the terms tadhakkur (to remind), tadarru` (to show humility), and ruju’ (to return to the path). These concepts link together in the following way: to return to the path that leads to Allah (awj) one must first be reminded of Allah (awj); he must then humble himself before Allah (awj); only then can he truly return to Allah (awj) and better himself. Imam ‘Ali b. Abi Talib (ع) refers to this Qur`anic truth in the following way: “When Allah’s servants commit a sin, He tests them with hardship until they repent and cease committing sins and heed Allah’s admonishment.”14

If what we have said so far is true, then one might wonder why Allah’s (awj) prophets (ع), Imams (ع), and saints are tested? The answer to this question is found in a narration of Imam ‘Ali b. Abi Talib (ع) where he says: “The divine test is a form of discipline for the wrongdoer, a test for the believer, a means to increase one’s station for the prophets, and a means of ennoblement for the saints of Allah.”15

🍃🌺🍃~*~⛲️~*~🍃🌺🍃

🍃🕊🍃 Sources 🍃🕊🍃

1. A Divine precedent is a Divine action that

is not bound to any specific time, place

or people. Rather it is a sort of law the

Allah (awj) has issued for Himself in such

a way that from the beginning of time

into eternity, He always acts according to

this law. For example, one of the Divine

precedents can be stated like this:

“If a people rejects Divine guidance and

kills Allah’s (awj) prophets and it

becomes apparent that there is no hope

that even one person from among them

will submit himself to Allah (awj),

they must be destroyed.”

2. Surat al-Insan (76), (Verse 3)

إِنَّا هَدَيْنٌهُ السَّبِيلَ إِمَّا شَاكِراً وَإِمَّا كَفُوراً

3. Surat al-Fussilat (41), (Verse 17)

4. Surat Taha (20), (Verse 50)

قَالَ رَبُّنَا الَّذِي أَعْطـى كُلَّ شَيْءٍ خَلْقَهُ ثُمَّ هَدى

5. Surat al-A’la (87), (Verse 2-3)

أَلَّذِي خَلَقَ فَسَوَّى. وَالَّذِي قَدَّرَ فَهَدى

6. Surat al-Kahf (18), (Verse 7)

Also refer to: Surat al-Insan (76),

(Verse 2) Surat al-Anbiya’ (21),

(Verse 35) Surat Ali-’Imran (3),

(Verse 154) Surat al-Fajr (89),

(Verse 6) Surat al-Taghabun (64),

(Verse 15) Surat Muhammad (47),

(Verse 4)

إِنَّا جَعَلْنَا مَا عَلـى الأَرْضِ زِيْـنَةً لَّهَا لِبَنْلُوَهُمْ أَيُّهُمْ أَحْسَنُ عَمَلاً

7. Surat Ali-’Imran (3), (Verse 141)

وَلِـيُمَحِّصَ اللٌّهُ الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَ يَمْحَقَ الْكٌفِرِينَ

8. Surat Taha (20), (Verse 132)

وَ الْعَاقِبَةُ ِللتَّقْوى

9. Surat al-Anbiya’ (21), (Verse 105)

وَلَقَدْ كَتَبْـنَا فِي الزَّبُورِ مِنْ بَعْدِ الذِّكْرِ أَنَّ الأَرْضَ يَرِثُهَا عِبَادِيَ الصَّالِحُونَ

10. Nahjal Balagha, Short (Saying 217)

فِي تَقَلُبِّ الأَحْوَالِ عِلْمُ جَوَاهِرِ الرِّجَالِ.

11. al-Kafi, (vol. 1 pg. 370)

سَمِعْتُ أَبَا الْحَسَنِ ( ع)‏ يَقُولُ: اَلم أَحَـسِبَ النَّاسُ أَنْ يُتْرَكُوا أَنْ يَقُولُوا آمَنَّا وَهُمْ لاَ يُفْتَنُونَ ثُمَّ قَالَ لِي: مَا الْفِتْنَةُ؟ قَلْتُ: جُعِلْتُ فِدَاكَ الَّذِي عِنْدَنَا الْفِتْنَةُ فِي الدِّينِ، فَقَالَ: يُفْـتَُنُونَ كَمَا يَُفْـتَنُ الذَّهَبُ، ثُمَّ قَالَ: يُخْلَصُونَ كَمَا يُخْلَصُ الذَّهَبُ.

12. Nahjal Balagha, (Short Saying 93)

وَ إِنْ كَانَ سُبْحَانَهُ أَعْلَمُ بِهِمْ مِنْ أَنْفُسِهِمْ وَ لٌكِنْ لِتَظْهَرَ الأَفْعَالُ الَّـتِي بِهَا يُسْتَحَقُّ الثَّوَابُ وَالْعِقَابُ.

13. Surat al-A’raf (7), (Verse 94)

Surat al-Rum (30), (Verse 41)

Surat al-Sajdah (32), (Verse 21)

Surat al-A’raf (7), (Verses 30-168)

Surat al-Tawbah (9), (Verse 126)

14. Nahjal Balagha, (Sermon 143)

إِنَّ اللٌّهَ يَبْتَلِي عِبَادَهُ عِنْدَ الأَعْمَالِ السَّيِّئَةِ بِنَقْصِ الثَّمَرَاتِ... لِيَتُوبَ تَائِبٌ وَيَقْلَعَ مُقْلِعٌ وَيَتَذَكَّرَ مُتَذَكِّرٌ.

15. Bihar al-Anwar, (vol. 4, pg. 235, no. 54)

إِنَّ الْبَلاَءَ لِلظَّالِمِ أَدَبٌ وَلِلْمُؤْمِنِ اِمْتِحَانٌ وَلِِلاَنْبِيَاءِ دَرَجَةٌ وَلِلأَوْلِيَاءِ كَرَامَةٌ.

🍃🌺🍃~*~⛲️~*~🍃🌺🍃

🍃🕊🍃 al-Islam.org 🍃🕊🍃

.

[haemey]

Aaaaand now you know German verbs and pronouns! (No you don't, but you're like... three steps closer to it.)

Similarly to (I think it was) Middle English, it's always fun to see how things and concepts can be quite difficult to wrap your head around for native speakers, while it might be easier for speakers of other languages (in this case, German, since English is, at its core, a Germanic language).

-en infinite form? Yep. (To go -> gehen)

-st second person/-(e)t third person? Yep. (Ich gehe, du gehst, er/sie/es geht)

Separate forms for second person singular/plural? Yep. (Thou -> du, ye/you -> ihr)

The e of the second person ending has been mostly lost, but may sometimes be used in poetry still, after a consonant. (Du gehst -> du gehest, du trinkst (you drink) -> du trinkest, etc).

In German, the polite way to address someone used to be Ihr, but at some point switched to Sie (third person plural, They) with all the grammatical implications thereof, spelled with a capital letter to distinguish from the one meant for several people. Nowadays, this form seems to gradually disappear, since most younger people, unless they're in a formal setting, will simply address everybody (except maybe significantly older people) with informal du. I expect Sie to fall mostly out of favour in the next few generations, if not decades.

Fun fact: when addressing a group of adults, some of which you know, some lf which you don't know, the polite way to address them would be "Sie und ihr," so formal and informal you together. And then, to save yourself the hassle of having to decline every single verb, you just... fade out one of them during your speech, according to politeness/formality level.

NO ONE knows how to use thou/thee/thy/thine and i need to see that change if ur going to keep making “talking like a medieval peasant” jokes. /lh

They play the same roles as I/me/my/mine. In modern english, we use “you” for both the subject and the direct object/object of preposition/etc, so it’s difficult to compare “thou” to “you”.

So the trick is this: if you are trying to turn something Olde, first turn every “you” into first-person and then replace it like so:

“I” →  “thou”

“Me” →  “thee”

“My” →  “thy”

“Mine” →  “thine”

Let’s suppose we had the sentences “You have a cow. He gave it to you. It is your cow. The cow is yours”.

We could first imagine it in the first person-

“I have a cow. He gave it to me. It is my cow. The cow is mine”.

And then replace it-

“Thou hast a cow. He gave it to thee. It is thy cow. The cow is thine.”

[nouklea]

Just a scene...

English is not my native language, so this text will probably hurt the eyes of many of you with bad grammar and verb tenses mistakes... But I just had to try to write it down.  It's just a scene, I don't know exactly how to get there and what happens after.  And I have no idea how AO3 works so I'm just going to post it here.  Hope you enjoy. (And hope I'm tagging it right!)

General plot line :  The group found a way to neutralize the hyde in Tyler, but they know it won't last.  While they look for a permanent solution, Tyler is locked down in a cell they discovered in Nevermore's basement.

Right before the scene : Xavier shows up in the prison and threatens to kill Tyler.

-------

Tyler eared a gasp, and his eyes flickered from Xavier for a second.  Enid was standing on the doorstep, eyes wide, mouth open.  Color left her cheeks as she understood what was happening.

"Enid, get out of here!" he urged.

How far would Xavier go?  Would the jerk kill him in front of her?  Would he arm her?  That was bad...

"Xavier, what the hell?" was her answer.  She seemed to work to control her tone, keeping it light, but it sounded a little off.

"What does it look like?"  Xavier's voice was a snarl.  "Someone should have kill that piece of shit a long time ago!"

"Get out, Enid.  Please go!"  Tyler whispered, but the girl paid no attention to him as she took a step forward.

"Xav, please don't.  You're not a murderer..."

Her words were meant to calm him, but his anger seem to explode.

"You're right!  I'M NOT!" he yelled.  "Ironic, isn't it?  Seems like it's the only way to get some consideration around here, though!  This sucker killed Rowan, sent Eugene to the hospital, almost got you too, and here you are, babysitting him as if he was your little wonder.  We don't want to make little hyde unhappy, right?"

Tyler's throat felt tighter.  Xavier wasn't wrong...

Something suddenly shifted in Xavier's posture.  He was staring past Enid in disbelief, straightening himself.  Tyler's eyes followed his, and he caught his breath.

Wednesday was standing still by the doorstep.  Too still.  Her dark eyes were locked on Xavier, filled with cold fury.  She was holding a fireman's axe, classic wood handle and red blade, and later Tyler would wonder if it was hers or if she had grabbed it from an emergency kit hanging here and there in the halls.  For now, all he could proceed what how breathtaking she was.

When she spoke, Wednesday's voice was cold and sharp.

"Drop the bow right now, or you will lose a hand."

A memory rose in Tyler's mind.  The Rave'N.  Wednesday telling him she would have taken his prank much farther.  I'd do it again, had she said about those piranhas in her old school's swimming pool.  His mouth went dry.  She was an avenger.  That was bad... and also a little arousing, he had to admit.  I knew there was a reason I liked you...

Xavier made the mistake of shrugging carelessly, an ironic smile forming on his lips.  His face turned white a second later when Wednesday started to walk towards him with an angry determination.  He took a step back, then a second one, and realized she was serious.  He threw the bow on the floor and raised his hands as to calm her.

That did not stop her.  She was on the hunt.

His third step back was shaky and he felt on the floor.

"Shit!  Don't, please!" he yelled, trying to protect his head with his arms.

Tyler's heart seemed to stop as Wednesday raised the axe and snapped.  Enid screamed.  A loud unexpected sound resonated in the room and Xavier was suddenly still.

Time seemed to be suspended for a second.  And then Xavier lower his arms and looked up.

The axe had broken through the wooden floor, hard enough that it now stood by itself.  The bow was shattered, its pieces spread in the room.  Half crouched, Wednesday was staring at him, a carnal smile turning her face into something wild.

"Go away." was all she said.

Xavier was petrified, a deer facing the lights of a car...

"You're mad..." he whispered.

Wednesday stood up and towered him, her smile gone.  Her voice was ice.

"I said GO AWAY!  Now!"

Xavier seemed to wake from a nightmare.  He managed to raise and hurried past her.  Tyler noticed she turned slightly, never letting him out of her sight.  He had reach Enid when he stopped.

"You're a psychopath!" he spat, his voice a pitch to high.

"Thank you." was Wednesday's reply as he burst out of the room.

The prison went silent, as time stood still.

Then, slowly, Wednesday turned her head and looked at him, her face giving nothing.  Her eyes traveled along his body and back to his face, scanning him, looking for injuries.  He almost blushed.

Talk to me, Tyler pleaded in his head.  But the girl remained silent has they stared at each other.  Tyler was about to say something, anything, when she suddenly turned back and walked to Enid.

She acknowledged Thing first.  Tyler had not realized the hand had even  been in the room.  Wednesday crouched beside him and nodded, answering a silent question that Tyler did not understood.  Thing swiftly disappeared out of the room.  Wednesday watched him leave, then stood by Enid.

"Are you all right?" she asked, her tone almost gentle.  Almost.

Enid shivered.

"Yeah, I'm good." she answered with a shaky voice.

"Can you handle him alone, or do you need Ajax to come down here?"

She was doing everything in her power to stay as far as she could from him. Tyler already knew that, but still felt those words like a slap in the face. 

"I'm fine."  Enid's voice was almost back to normal, color returning to her cheeks.  Wednesday nodded and left without looking back at him.

The blond girl shivered and shook her head, before faking a smile.  She walked by his cell.

"Whoa!  That was intense!" were the first words she spoke to him.

Intense?  It was a sweet way to call what had just happened...

Enid started to hand him some packages through the bars.  He could feel she was recovering quickly, moving more confidently.

"Here you go!  Turkey sandwich, some fries, a coke and an apple.  Oh and I added a few chocolate cookies I baked this morning.  Sounds good?"

"Thanks", mumbled Tyler while taking his first bite.  Homemade cookies?  How long has it been since he ate his last homemade cookie?  Years.  Many years...  He felt a sudden emotion.  Enid was a good person.

Xavier's voice erupted in his mind.  You babysit him as if he was your little wonder.  We don't want to make little hyde unhappy, right?  The sandwich suddenly tasted wrong in his mouth.  Homemade cookies?  The damn jerk was right...

Unaware of Tyler's mood, Enid was back to chatting.

"Lucky for us... well mostly, lucky for you... that Thing was on the watch.  At least Xavier should keep his distances for a while.  He's stubborn, but if he doesn't let go now, then there is no hope for him.  Poor guy is usually nice, but damn, he's so obsesses with Wednesday..."

That last sentence took Tyler out of his sulking.  Enid caught his curious glance and seemed happy to go on.

"Well, you know...  After you left, Xavier was hoping Wednesday would finally fall for him.  It didn't happened.  And now you're back, and he can see how much she cares about you, and he's so jealous he's going nuts."

Jealous?  Anger burst through Tyler's mind.  His answer came out bitter.

"Yeah, who wouldn't want to take my place.  A monster responsible for the fall of his own mother, who was triggered and mastered by a psychopath, who can turn wild at any moment and attack anyone, even those he loves...  The damn asshole has no idea..."

He shook his head and went on.

"And Wednesday doesn't give a shit about me.  She has her own agenda and I'm just a tool."

Enid looked genuinely offended, almost angry.

"Oh come on, Tyler Galpin!  The girl is in love with you!"

Words had burst out of her mouth.  She made a sheepish face, as if she had said too much.  Tyler froze.  Her sentence was simple, but absurd...

"You're out of your mind." he answered blankly.  "She knows what I am, she knows what I've done.  She would never..."

Glancing at Enid, he suddenly felt like a kindergarten whose teacher was about to explain why it wasn't kind not to share that blue dinosaur...  Enid had a gentle smile on the lips, and spoke with a calm and soft voice.

"Sweetie, we're talking about Wednesday Addams here.  Do you really think that being a hyde, and a killer, would turn her down?  Haven't you seen how lethal she just went to protect you?  She's crazy about you, silly boy!"

Confusion washed over him as he proceeded her words.  It made no sense.  Wednesday hated him.  There was no way for her to have any other kind of feelings.  Or was it?  The boy's eyes flickered to the axe and what remained of Xavier's bow.  She had been so wild, and violent... and dazzling...  He tried to smash the seed of hope that was subtly taking roots in his head.  He could not allow it.

"She has not said a single word to me since she locked me up.  She sends you instead of coming here.  She can't stand to be in the room if I'm there..."

Enid sighted.

"You know her, she struggles with her feelings.  Nothing new about that.  But let me tell you something.  You can't know what's going on because you've been stuck in here for a while, and honestly I'm not exactly sure what she's up to since she doesn't exactly shares her plans... But Wednesday is literally unleashing hell out there, and she's doing it for you."

Enid had spoken fervently, and Tyler had no doubt that the girl truly believed what she had said.  Was it real, though, or just a fantasy of her? 

He did not replied, and Enid went silent, as if she understood he needed a moment.  She let him eat his lunch without a comment, and he felt grateful for that.  It was too much to take.  Between his own feelings and the pain he felt, he could not accept Enid's words.

The girl is in love with you.

She doesn't care if you are a monster.

She's unleashing hell for you.

Those statements felt like sharp blades breaking through the walls he was desperately trying to built around his fears.  He knew how he felt about Wednesday.  His mind constantly focused on her.  His body reacted every time he was near her.  Hell, even her dark eyes appeared in his dreams.  He had come to accept the fact that whatever they had shared was now gone and would never rise again.  He cursed Laurel Gates every night for that, and for everything else she had ruined in his life.  However, Enid's convictions had shaken him, and he felt like he was about to jump in a dark hole, not knowing how deep it was or what would wait for him down there.

He was done eating now, and Enid collected the trash.

"Do you need anything else?  Books maybe?" she asked.

We don't want to make the little hyde unhappy, right?

He hesitated.  Enid seemed honestly eager to help him.  Avoiding her gaze, he jumped.

"Do you think...  Could you...  If I wrote something, would you give it to her?"

Enid's eyes went wide as a grin enlighten her face.  She was delighted! 

"A letter?  This is SO romantic!  Of course I'll give it to her!"

She was clapping her hands like a kid on Christmas's morning, and Tyler wondered if he had made a mistake.  But it was too late, the damage was done...  He watch as she took her phone.

"Hey babe!  You're busy?  Ok cool!  Would you be sweet and bring me a pile of papers and a pen?  No, not to my room, down here...  Oh! And an envelope too!  Thanks honey!  Love you!  Hang up!  No you do it!  Love you too!  Hang up!"

Tyler managed to shut her voice out of his mind.  Enid was the kindest person he knew, and without a doubt the most optimistic, but in time like these he felt exhausted by her joy of living.  He almost felt dizzy. 

She finally hung up the phone, or had he?, and turn to him.

"Ajax is bringing everything you'll need.  So look, you spend your afternoon writing, and I'll take your letter upstairs when I'll bring you dinner.  Sounds good?"

She had taken full control of the situation, he realized.  There was no way he could back off now, she would harass him until he wrote that damn letter.  He sight.  It's not like he had something better to do, anyway...

"Sounds good.  Thanks."  he mumbled.

Ajax showed up a few minutes later.  His first move was to kiss Enid with an enthusiasm that made Tyler want to be elsewhere...  Then he handed the material, and the happy couple left, locking the prison's door behind them. 

At last. 

Tyler need the silence to clear his thoughts.  Too much had happened in the last hour, too much had been said, and he had felt too many conflicted emotions.  Fear of dying.  Relief of dying.  Terror for Enid.  Stupor and amazement and other feelings he should not allow himself to feel when it came to Wednesday.  Hope for an acknowledgement.  Pain from her silence.  And at last his world turning upside down with Enid's revelations.  He was exhausted. 

Gazing at the white sheets, he wondered if he could do it.  Find the proper words to reach her.

[annas-hair-donut]

Waffle Waltz

Fandom: Frozen (Disney Movies) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Anna/Kristoff, Background Elsa/Hans Characters: Anna, Kristoff, Hans, Elsa, Bulda Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Norway (Country), Waltzing, Folk Dance, Weddings, Light Angst, Eventual Fluff, Enemies to Lovers, Good Hans Words: 4408

Summary: Anna travels to Tromsø, Norway to attend her sister Elsa's wedding, and ends up renting a room with Bulda and her grumpy and resentful son Kristoff, who is the king of waffles.

1. Waffle, Noun: (1) A soft indented cake cooked in a waffle iron; (2) Empty or pretentious words 2. Waffle, Verb: (1) Equivocate, vacillate; (2) To blather

Read the entire fic @AO3. Preview below the cut.

“Another waffle, Anna?” asked Bulda.

“Yes, please!” Anna responded in her heavy American accent. “We don’t have anything like this back home.  Well, I mean, we have waffles.  But they’re different.  Oh, but Norway is just beautiful!  I’m really loving it here.  And Oslo is amazing! Not that I’ve seen much because I’m really trying to graduate in May.  But I absolutely love the Norsk Folkemuseum and the Fram Museum.  And I can't wait to see Tromsø!  I was just a baby when we moved to Boston so I really don't remember anything.”

Bulda's son Kristoff grunted and slid Anna’s third waffle onto her plate.

“Takk, Kristoff,” she said, daring him to look at her.  He didn't, which was only mildly infuriating.  But he did say something in Sami, which she didn't understand.

Anna hadn't spoken Norwegian since her dad passed away several years ago, and her mom died when she was too young to learn Sami. She'd been hoping to strengthen her Norwegian and to learn Sami when she transferred to the American University in Oslo, but all of her classes were conducted in English and most of her classmates spoke even less Norwegian than she did. She'd gotten much more practical experience speaking Norwegian in just the few days she'd been staying with Bulda and Kristoff, neither of whom spoke English.  But Kristoff wasn’t doing anything to help; he spoke in Sami every chance he got.  And Anna's Sami language class got cancelled because she was the only person to sign up.  Anna even asked Kristoff to teach her, but she took his response in Sami to be a no.  At least she learned one word.

Bulda smiled politely, then noted, "You’re here a bit early for Waffle Day, unfortunately, but I’m sure your university will have a big event.  Anyway, we don’t need a holiday to indulge in my son’s specialty, do we?” she said intimately.

Then she passed Anna small dishes with whipped cream, fresh butter, and cloudberry jam, which Anna generously heaped onto her waffle.  "This jam is so good!" she got in between bites.

Bulda clapped her hands together, and said, “Good!  Maybe I can show you how to make it while you're here?  Cloudberries are actually a staple of Sami cuisine."

With her mouth full, Anna nodded at her host.  And when she was almost done chewing, she said, “I'd love that!"

“You know, you remind me so much of your mom," she said, and Anna looked down from embarrassment.  And on the way up she caught Kristoff's eyes for a split second and ruined the moment.

"I just loved that woman. Sweet, sweet lady. We actually used to perform in a Sami dance group together.  Anyway, we’re just so glad you came to stay with us,” Bulda said fondly before turning steely eyes to her son. “Aren’t we, Kristoff?”

Kristoff flipped his eyes reluctantly to Anna in a way that shook her with equal parts discomfort and intrigue.  His eyes were warm and intelligent and completely wasted on him; eyes like that were meant to be stared into and admired properly, and he seemed unable to make eye contact for more than a second at a time.

“Well,” Bulda said, “maybe you’ll think about staying in Tromsø a little longer after your sister’s wedding?”

Her tone was full of hope when she addressed her son, “Wouldn’t that be lovely, Kristoff?”

“Wonderful,” he said without any emotion so they’d know he didn’t mean it.

“Well, unless our guest would like any more waffles,” he said with just a bit of a bite, “I need to practice for the wedding.”

“Oh, ok,” Bulda said with downcast eyes.  “I was hoping you’d give Anna a tour of the town today.”

He scoffed, “Just because she’s renting a room with us doesn’t obligate me to be her personal tour guide.  I have things to do.”  

Bulda said something to him in Sami.  Then he walked off, leaving his mother and guest in a bit of a shock.

“That’s ok,” Anna said meekly, trying to cover up her hurt.  “I have wedding things to do with my sister today anyway, like picking up my bunad from the tailor.”

Elsa was actually still on her research trip to Svalbard and wouldn’t be back for another couple of days.  Anna probably wouldn’t even get to see Elsa until the wedding.  So she was on her own until then.

But Anna didn’t need a tour guide anyway.  She could just wander and see everything on her own like she was used to.  She didn’t need any grumpy boys with big brown eyes and two day old scruff slowing her down!

Continue reading @ AO3.

[gendercensus]

Supplementary survey: they/them reflexives, The Sir/Ma’am Issue, and Spivak vs. Elverson

This short, clarifying survey ran from 4th until 24th April 2021. There were 2,998 usable responses. Unlike the annual Gender Census survey, this one was open to anyone of any gender, provided they lived in an English-speaking country.

It asked about two things:

They/them verbs and reflexives - basically whether people who prefer they/them pronouns prefer the reflexive to be themself or themselves, and which people feel is more “correct”.

Sir/ma’am/? - investigating why people use sir/ma’am in areas where it’s polite and common to do so, and whether there are any viable nonbinary or gender-neutral alternatives.

This blog post will also investigate the Spivak vs. Elverson issue, which was actually a separate poll that took place on two social networks.

~

THEY/THEM VERBS AND REFLEXIVES

Someone asked about themself vs. themselves, and it reminded me of some of the they/them issues that people ask about in feedback boxes and various confusions surrounding them.

Singular they - what is it, and when and how do people use it?

Plural they - what is it, and when and how do people use it?

What is the “correct” reflexive for each of these?

You can see the statistics in more detail here, but here’s the graph as an overview:

Participants were asked a series of questions about singular they pronouns. Everyone was asked a “which is correct” question, and participants who sometimes or always like to be called ”they” were also asked about their personal preferences.

The graph is a view of only participants who sometimes or always like to be called “they”.

Verbs. As you can see, participants overwhelmingly (94.3%) wanted people to use plural verbs (”they are reading a book”) when talking about them in the third person - even though the percentage of people who thought that was the most “correct” form was a little lower (81.8%). This was lower because 11.4% of participants who preferred “they” answered “both are correct”.

Reflexives. People were much more likely to say that both themself and themselves were correct (28.3%), and more likely to have no preference between the two (17.4%). However, themself was still more popular overall at 59.3%, and 47.3% thought themself was grammatically correct.

You as a control. I also asked all participants whether yourself or yourselves was more correct when addressing one person as a kind of control question, because they is almost grammatically identical to you - it can refer to one person or multiple people, it takes plural verbs even when referring to/addressing one person, and in that situation only the reflexive changes. Many people who say that singular they is grammatically incorrect have no issues with singular you, so it seemed like something that might be interesting to compare. In the graph above you can see that 93.6% of people thought yourself was more correct; only 4.2% of they-accepting participants felt that both yourself and yourselves were equally correct when addressing one person.

There were a couple of things that came up several times in the comments:

“They is” is common in African-American Vernacular English (AAVE), and probably in other dialects too. As I don’t live in the US I’m pretty unfamiliar with this dialect, but either way that seems fine to me. It’s part of why I also asked for participants’ locations, because I wanted others to be able to download the results and see if some regions were more likely to use some words/constructions than others.

There were some alternatives to themself and themselves presented, such as theirself and theirsen. Both of these points lead nicely to the third...

The idea that any language choice is more “correct” than another is quite prescriptive. What feels correct or natural varies depending on a lot of factors, such as where in the world you learned English, and there is no such thing as objective correctness when it comes to such a broad and variable language as English.

I am aware of and agree with that third bullet point, so my asking which phrases were more “correct” was a bit of a trick question. It was a good way to get a feel for people’s linguistic instincts.

I also thought it was interesting that participants who never wanted to be called they were slightly more likely to side with the most popular view on what is “correct” across the board, and less likely to say “both are correct”.

~

PLURAL VS. SINGULAR THEY

I actually ran another version of this survey first and then scrapped the responses, because it was clear that my survey design was leading to some pretty confused and unhelpful data! Among other things, it asked participants whether they preferred singular or plural they for themselves and then directed them to particular questions based on their answer, and the comments suggested that people either didn’t really understand the distinction or meant different things by those terms, even though I had added help text.

This is my understanding:

Singular they is they/them pronouns when used to refer to one person. Verbs are usually plural (i.e. “they are” rather than “they is”), and themself and themselves are both common. Example usage: They are getting themself a cup of coffee. They bought themselves a nice new hat.

Plural they is they/them pronouns when used to refer to two or more people. Verbs are usually plural (i.e. “they are” rather than “they is”), and themselves is almost universal (with the exception of regional variations such as theirselves). Example usage: They are getting themselves some coffee together. They all bought hats for themselves.

Some plural/multiple people refer to themselves as “we” and prefer to be addressed as “they/themselves” (which they call plural they) because they are a group of individuals sharing one body.

The reason I initially asked directly about singular vs. plural they is because I was concerned that plural/multiple systems would cause some statistical confusion. Many plural people have asked me to add plural they to the checkbox list of pronouns in the annual survey, but since it has never been entered by over 1% of participants I have never had reason to do so. As far as I knew, the only difference between singular and plural they is the reflexive (themself for singular and themselves for plural), so I wanted to be able to investigate non-plural people in isolation, and I was curious to know about any trends or differences. I wanted to find out if I should be doing anything differently to ensure that Gender Census statistics are helpful.

So, I swapped out the badly-designed question for a straight-up checkbox, a “check this box if you’re plural/multiple” type of thing, with a note that participants should fill in the survey once per body wherever possible, and then I made some graphs.

Here you can see that plural systems were still more likely to prefer people to use themself to refer to them rather than themselves, though the margin is narrower:

Plural participants were also more likely to say that they sometimes or never want people to refer to them as they, whereas non-plural people were more likely to want people to always refer to them as they (or they just feel fine about it):

There’s not a lot in it, though. It’s all relatively evenly distributed, with no strong leader in either category there.

For the curious: 8.2% of participants checked the plural/multiple box.

In conclusion: plural and non-plural people alike all prefer people to use themself when referring to them in the third person using they/them pronouns, and I feel that there is probably no need to ask about plurality or separate out data from plural people in future. (Asking about this and seeing the responses did in part prompt me to start an anonymous feedback form for plural participants of the Gender Census, though.)

~

THE SIR/MA’AM ISSUE

For several years participants have been asking me in the feedback box of the annual Gender Census survey to also ask about gender-inclusive or nonbinary-specific alternatives to sir and ma’am. I’ve largely not done anything about it, because when informally asking around I’ve generally had the response “just don’t say sir or ma’am, just leave it out altogether.” I live in the UK, where if someone calls you sir/ma’am you’re either looking at home in a fancy restaurant for billionnaires or you’re being made fun of - or sometimes both.

However, during this year’s annual survey while talking about it in a little more depth I learned that there are places in the world where sir/ma’am is very common, required for politeness, and basically inescapable. Nonbinary people in those areas are really struggling, because they do actually need a nonbinary-friendly stand-in for those terms - omitting the sir/ma’am isn’t an option.

Again, the location question was asked so that anyone else downloading the spreadsheet of responses can analyse by region to find out whether sir/ma’am is ubiquitous in particular regions and in which contexts it is used, and can even check whether there is a region-specific alternative to sir/ma’am emerging. I asked several questions about sir/ma’am, including about reasons/contexts and personal preferences, and some superficial analysis is included on the spreadsheet of responses.

But the juicy bit is the nonbinary-specific and gender-inclusive alternative words, right?

[The counting formula is case-sensitive so I made everything lowercase to make the count a little more accurate.]

Suggested gender-inclusive alternatives to sir/ma’am

mx - 4.1% (151)

friend - 2.2%

comrade - 1.2%

captain - 0.7%

ser - 0.5%

mate - 0.4%

m - 0.3%

per - 0.3%

boss - 0.3%

folks - 0.3% (9)

Suggested nonbinary-specific alternatives to sir/ma’am

mx - 8.3% (250)

mix - 0.7%

tiz - 0.5%

friend - 0.4%

ser - 0.4%

comrade - 0.3%

mixter - 0.3%

captain - 0.2%

ind - 0.2%

mir - 0.2% (6)

So it looks like Mx (pronounced “mix” or with a toneless vowel that sounds a bit like “mux”) is the clear winner in both categories. If you want to try to introduce a gender-neutral version of sir/ma’am in your area this one is probably your best bet.

~

SPIVAK VS. ELVERSON

This wasn’t part of the same survey! It was a Twitter poll and a Mastodon poll that ran for one week and ended today, and I’m putting it here because it has to go somewhere.

Sometimes people refer to the ey/em and e/em “versions” of the Spivak pronoun set, which makes my eyebrows do things, because they’re not both Spivak. They are distinct established pronoun sets with their own names.

Spivak - e/em/eir/eirs/emself - written about by Michael Spivak in the 1990s. [source: Nonbinary Wiki]

Elverson - ey/em/eir/eirs/emself - created by Christine M Elverson in the 1970s. [source: Nonbinary Wiki]

The Elverson set is older, but it’s less well-known for some reason, so they’re assumed to be variants of Spivak due to the similarity in spelling.

I was recently asked how we can know which is more popular, given the “oh this checkbox option is close enough, I’ll just choose that instead of typing in my very slightly different set” effect and the “hmm this checkbox option is very close to my set, I’m probably meant to choose this one” effect, plus the boost that checkbox options get with the “oh I hadn’t thought of that one but yeah, why not” effect. Spivak (e/em) is on the checkbox list of pronouns in the annual survey, so it appears to be much more popular than Elverson (ey/em)... but is it really?

I ran a poll on both Twitter and Mastodon, and then used a spreadsheet to extract the useful numbers. There were 141 relevant votes after one week. I wouldn’t usually make annual-survey-altering decisions based on a sample that small, but in this case the results are extremely decisive:

It seems that the highest proportion of people who like at least one of the sets are happy for both to be used, at 48%. 45% prefer ey/em (Elverson) and 7% prefer e/em (Spivak). This is pretty stunning! I’ve been presenting e/em (Spivak) as a checkbox option on the Gender Census annual survey for years, possibly since the first survey in 2013, and because it’s a checkbox option it seems to be consistently a lot more popular than ey/em (Elverson). That’s 4.3% and 0.6% respectively in the 2021 survey. But this poll suggests that actually ey/em (Elverson) is much more popular when the two pronoun sets are viewed on a level playing field.

When you remove all “I don’t mind” votes, you get this:

Over 6 times as many people prefered Elverson!

I will definitely be adding Elverson to the Gender Census next year, just so that we can split the e/em and ey/em votes and really get to the bottom of this.

Anyway, while we’re on the topic, ey/em takes singular verbs most of the time.

[circlique]

Hey! Could you do a short story about America and Young-soo in the Korean War? Ethier that or Korea finally admitting the pain he suffered under 2p Japan?

Yong Soo stared absently into the flickering flames in the shallow pit in front of him. The fire, started hurriedly from a hastily cobbled together pile of rubble from what used to be a nearby village, wasn’t doing much to make him feel better.

Then again, what could? He felt as if all warmth had been drained out of him the day his brother crossed the 38th parallel. All he could feel was a dull ache throughout his body. His heart, his mind...everything else just felt numb.

He felt eyes on him, and managed to glance up.

Alfred smiled at him.

“This will all be over by Christmas!” the bright-eyed American assured him.

Yong Soo could only stare back at him blankly. How could the American be so positive at a time like this? Yong Soo’s entire country...not even his country at this point. Ninety percent of it was in the hands of the communists now. Yong Soo’s men were backed up into the last remaining corner of this peninsula, huddled around this tiny fire in the ruins of the last village to have fallen—staked out trying to hold the “Pusan Perimeter,” as they called it.

It was so bleak, but Alfred still found some way to smile.

“K...keuriseumaseu?” Yong Soo asked in his still heavily accented English. He had been working on it, and his time spent with Alfred had helped, but studying simply was not on his list of priorities right now.

“Yeah! You know what Christmas is right?”

Yong Soo’s eyes drifted toward the ground. A Christian holiday, celebrating the birth of their savior...but he couldn’t remember the details.

“Yeah...” he muttered, more to get Alfred to shut up than anything.

Of course, Alfred could never take a hint.

“Yeah!” the American continued, leaning in and stooping down so that he could look into Yong Soo’s downcast eyes. “I promise! This will be over by Christmas! We can have a celebration at my place! We can make cookies, decorate a tree—oh! Do you know any Christmas carols, Yong Soo?”

Yong Soo’s blank expression slowly grew more perplexed. He was still trying to register all the strange words and make sense of them in his head. Carols?

“Uhh...” he started, but Alfred, sensing Yong Soo’s hesitance, continued before he could answer.

“Oh! I bet you know this one right?” Alfred said before turning to one of the American soldiers near him. “On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...!”

“A partridge in a pear tree!” the soldiers answered, their voices elevating in unison.

“On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me...!” Alfred continued with the next verse.

“Two turtle doves—and a partridge in a pear tree!”

“On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me...!” Alfred sang again, this time looking to Yong Soo and giving him a little nudge with his elbow.

His heart leapt. He didn’t know this song! But he couldn’t afford to look foolish in front of his American allies now, could he?

“Three French hens, two turtle doves—“ sang the Americans.

“—And...a par-teuridge in a pear tree,” Yong Soo managed to add in a faltering voice, as the rest of them sang with him.

The song continued through the rest of its dozen or so verses, each time Yong Soo managing to pick up a few more words than the last. By the end, he was confident in the first half of the strange, but somehow endearing gifts the song’s protagonist kept bestowing upon his lover, and he sang loudly along with the rest.

At the end of the twelfth verse, he waited with baited breath to see how this hapless, lovesick man could possibly best himself on the thirteenth day, only to see the rest of the soldiers clapping and congratulating each other for finishing. Oh...so it was only twelve verses then...

Yong Soo looked back to Alfred expectantly...and then realized he wasn’t really sure what he was expecting. Alfred simply smiled back at him as always. Always smiling...even as they were backed up against a wall like this.

Then Yong Soo realized—he was smiling too.

He felt a few tears stinging at his eyes and quickly wiped at his face with his sleeve, trying to pretend it was just the dust and smoke making his nose run or something. He couldn’t explain...how much it meant to him that Alfred had tried to make him smile even at a time like this, and in a way that genuinely made him feel included and a part of the group when he felt like he had lost the only other person who mattered. Normally it would have been his brother doing such things, but, well—

“Alfred—“ he said, pausing for a long time, trying to sort out the English words in his head. What was he trying to say? That he admired the American’s unwavering positivity, his warm heart, his kindness? How could he express that he wished he could be those same things in such a bleak situation?

“I...I like you!” he proclaimed after some thought, watching Alfred for his reaction.

Some of the Americans around them chuckled in amusement, and slowly, though it was hard to tell in the flickering light of the fire, Yong Soo was sure he saw Alfred’s cheeks flush red.

Oh—oh god. His heart leapt again and he felt a deep burning of embarrassment in his own cheeks. Yong Soo ran back through the English words in his head. How did it go? Subject verb object... Wait, he was missing some words! He had meant to say ‘I want to be like you!’ But in the rush of thoughts and emotions whirling in his brain, he had simply missed a few words, boiling the sentence down to the most important parts instead.

“I—well, I’m glad! I mean—I think you’re pretty cool too!” Alfred said after what felt like an eternity—which was saying a lot for a semi-immortal nation like Yong Soo!

He let out an unconscious sigh of relief. The soldiers seemed to have gone back about their business, dividing up rations and lighting cigarettes, oblivious now to the two nations. Yong Soo looked back up at Alfred feeling a little calmer now. With Alfred here, he could almost forget the aches, the war, the emptiness in his heart. After all, now he had someone else who could make him smile.

“Alfred...” Yong Soo managed to ask. “Can teach me...that song again?”

[muwur]

If requests are open.. Suga x reader -3rd year student- where friends to pining where reader is a exchange student mid year -parent’s job- and reader is new to the school, can barely communicate Japanese and is too shy to meet new people.. reader is welcomed as a co-manager for vb club and all the other boys adopt her has their sister. She tutors them in their English lesson too.. also how would Suga help her open up from her shyness..

request: sugawara x fem! reader who is a shy exchange student!

another beginning.

✩ one-shot ✩ for sugawara bb

❧ fem reader

✎ 4.9k words

a/n: FINALLY GOT THIS BBY DONE, ty for being patient requester <3 i hope its ok, lmk if u would like smth different!

also curious but do yall listen to music when you write or read? i dnt always but when i DO i listen to some boppy music so i can shake mah ass (unles im depresso AHAHA) LMAO rec me some pls--

send me asks--

current listen: juicy by doja cat, gasolina by daddy yankee, 11 PM by maluma

A pencil dangled between two of your fingers, gently swinging back and forth as you tapped the eraser’s tip against your chin in thought. Looking over Hinata’s shoulder at the worksheet laying on the table, you extended your hand and made a neat scrawl on the page. “That’s good translating, Hinata! However,” you dragged your pencil across the surface, marking a line and arrow to point at a space near the beginning of his sentence, “keep in mind that although gerunds look like verbs, they act as nouns. So, this word should go here.”

Yachi, who was seated to your right, nodded in agreement. “I looked through his notes doodles, and it looked like they were going over gerunds in class!”

With narrowed eyes, Hinata scanned the page, muttering the sentence underneath his breath. Suddenly, his hazel eyes lit up in understanding and his lips morphed into a round “O.” “Ohhhh, that make a lot more sense! Thanks, (y/n), you’re a big help, especially in English! Also, look, guys!”

He rummaged through his cluttered backpack and fished out a slightly wrinkled sheet of paper with a red “14/50” marked on the top right corner. Holding it up proudly, he declared, “I got a better score than last time! By nine points!”

“That’s still an F,” Tsukishima pointed out, eyes glued to the pages of the book he was reading. Yamaguchi and Kageyama tried to stifle their snickers.

“Y-You’re not even looking!” Hinata defended. The ginger was met with a shrug. “I don’t need to see the score to know you failed.”

Before any fighting could break out, however, the door swung open, revealing the remaining third-years. Bags of snacks in their arms, the four of them stepped in. “We’re back! Your parent/guardian let us in, (y/n),” Sugawara announced, setting his bag down on the table. The rest followed suit and set the goodies down. Rummaging through one of the bags, Daichi pulled out a meat bun.

“Hinata, here’s your meat bun,” he said, handing the snack to the excited first-year, who had long-forgotten Tsukishima’s snide remark about his lack of intellectual aptitude. Kiyoko offered Kageyama his milk, the slight brush of their hands being enough to stir Noya and Tanaka into an envious craze. Asahi tried to settle them down, nervously reminding them that they needed to act respectful in your home, especially after your family had agreed to let you all study there. You stifled a giggle as Sugawara and Daichi joined in, scolding their underclassmen for their poor behavior and threatening them with a time-out.

With an exasperated sigh, Sugawara took a seat next to you on the mat. “Ah, I can’t help but worry about how Ennoshita’s going to handle both of them on his own.”

Giving a sidelong glance to the second-year, who was now forcing Noya and Tanaka to complete timed practice problems, your lips formed a small smile. “Looks like he does a pretty good job at it, though.”

Sugawara let out an amused huff. “Guess I’m worried over nothing. Oh, also,” he dug into the plastic bag in front of him, taking out your favorite snack and offering it to you. “Here you go.”

(can u tell from my stories yet that fav snacks aka actions are my love language--)

“Oh, thank you, Suga, I didn’t even ask for this…” you flashed him a grateful smile and took the package from his hands, suppressing the blush that threatened to overcome your cheeks as your fingertips brushed. He gave a sheepish smile and glanced to the side in response, giving the back of his neck an anxious rub.

“Ah, it’s the least I could do to thank you for letting us all come over to study. It’s really helpful. I appreciate it, (y/n).”

“It’s not much, really. I’m more than glad to help you all (read: Hinata, Kageyama, Tanaka, and Noya) out with English and offer my place. Having everyone together makes it easier. They need to pass these exams so you all get to play.”

Your offer to help the team with their studies may have seemed a simple gesture as both their friend and co-manager. On the inside, however, you really were more than happy to have everyone over for whatever reason. It left you with a feeling of awe. The last thing you would’ve expected 3 months ago was to be sitting in your new home in Japan, surrounded by a group of people who accepted you despite your poor Japanese and late appearance to Karasuno. Just 4 months ago, after you learned about your parent/guardian’s job transfer to Japan, you were left feeling an array of mixed feelings:

Anxiety – a whole new country? With a language you could barely even speak or understand? How was that going to work? Could you even make friends at school? God knows how long it took you to make the friends you have now.

Disappointment – you were looking forward to graduating high school with the friends you’ve made throughout the past few years. Having to say goodbye would be difficult, and you’d miss them.

Yet, you felt a sliver of hopefulness – new experiences were waiting for you. You had the opportunity to lead a new life in a foreign place. It filled you both with fear and exhilaration.

On the night before your first day at Karasuno, you could barely sleep after spending hours religiously practicing how to introduce yourself in Japanese. Having to introduce yourself to the class and speaking with your new classmates was inevitable, after all. And so the next day, you found yourself standing in front of the classroom, trying to suppress the nervous shudder that threatened to rack your body and ignore the prickles of sweat on your palms. Despite how much you mentally recited your introduction that morning, your current situation left your mind blank, unable to conjure any words. Fueled by the awkward silence, the numerous gazes focused on you, and the growing pit of anxiety in your stomach, what came out was a quiet, jumbled form of what you intended to say.

“Hello, (y/n) (l/n). I’m (insert your original country name here). I can’t Japanese, but I hope friends. Everyone, nice to meet,” you bowed, both in respect and so that you could hide your face, which was red from embarrassment. You knew you messed up, but you pretended otherwise, hoping that nobody would point out your mistake.

You straightened up after a few moments of silence, registering the confused looks of your new classmates and feeling another stab of shame. In response to your introduction, the teacher raised her eyebrows and blinked in confusion. Then her eyes warmed, and she offered you a smile as she spoke up. “Class, this is (l/n) (y/n). She recently moved here from (insert OG country here). She’s still learning Japanese; however, her English is perfect, so I’m sure you can all learn something from each other. Please make her feel welcome. Your seat is over there, (l/n).”

Shoulders sagging, you made your way to your desk, avoiding eye contact despite the pairs of eyes that followed you to your seat. Focusing on the lecture was a struggle. Not only could you barely understand anything the teacher was saying; worries about how the rest of the day would go also flooded your mind. This was only the morning; how could you navigate your way through the halls? Ask for directions? Would you meet people? Where would you eat lunch? How could you survive?

The remainder of the classes went by gruesomely slow. Too embarrassed from your slip this morning and too shy to meet new people despite wanting to make a friend, you successfully dodged conversation with any of your classmates. You were relieved that finally lunch came by, yet that presented another problem. You weren’t sure where to go, but you were sure that you were going to eat by yourself.

After a few minutes of walking around the hallways, you settled for eating lunch in the classroom. At least it meant you didn’t have to rush to class after the bell rang. Taking a seat, you pulled out your boxed lunch and set it out in front of you. Painfully aware of how alone you must have looked, you pretended to look really interested in your meal (am i the only one or--). You poked it, broke it into pieces, then brought each sliver to your mouth and chewed slowly. If only your family had switched your phone plans earlier, then you could at least spend time scrolling the internet or lament to your friends back home about how your day was going.

Still “engrossed” in your meal, you failed to notice a figure standing in front of your desk. Only after you saw a hand situate itself on the edge of your desk did you look up.

You met the chestnut eyes of a boy. He bore a warm smile that made a small crinkle in his eyes and beauty mark. Strands of grey hair draped naturally in front of his eyes and framed the sides of his face. Despite your unease, his soft features helped to calm your racing heart and mind. He seemed a friendly person; after all, he was able to approach you.

“Hey, you’re (l/n), right? I’m Sugawara Koushi, but you can call me Suga. I’m in your class,” he introduced in pretty darn good English.

‘Man, that means he heard me this morning…’ you thought miserably. Yet, you couldn’t help but feel some relief. Perhaps you hadn’t given others or yourself much of a chance before jumping to the conclusion that you were incapable of meeting new people.

Clearing your throat, you shyly extended a hand to him in greeting. “Yes, I’m (y/n) (l/n). Call me (y/n). It’s nice to meet you, Suga,” you replied hesitantly, finally using the correct words in Japanese that you had been practicing the previous night.

Shaking your hand, his eyes widened in pleasant surprise. “Your Japanese sounds pretty good! You just moved, so you’re still learning, right? How about I help you improve that while you help me with English?”

You were about to nod eagerly in appreciation when you both overheard some snickering across the room. Two boys and a girl sat together, whispering quite loudly and sneaking oh-so-inconspicuous glances over at your desk. Taking notice that they were caught staring, they presumed to loudly munch on their meals and talk about the weather.

Suga only shot them annoyed glare and shook his head before turning his attention back to you. “Sorry, those are my… Friends.” The strain in his voice after saying that last word made you question if they really were on friendly terms.

After that day, you found yourself spending every lunch period with Suga and his other third-year friends Daichi, Asahi, and Shimizu. You initially felt unsure of how to talk to them, but after Sugawara’s efforts to include you in his circle and some reassuring words about being yourself and not letting a small, temporary language barrier hold you back from making friends, you earned a bit of confidence. While you spoke a hybrid of English and Japanese with them, you eventually managed to pick up a lot of Japanese from talking everyday, and after these few months of constant exposure, you were able to hold decent conversations. Additionally, the extra help you sought from the teaching staff allowed you to be able to keep up in class, and your instructors were understanding enough to give you some leniency on your assignments during this adjustment period.

Hanging around your new friends often, it was only a matter of time before you were introduced to the rest of Karasuno’s boys’ volleyball team. It occurred one lunch period three weeks after you first arrived, when Asahi suggested that you join some club activities. You were discouraged, however, considering that it was already halfway through the year, you didn’t know enough Japanese yet to converse with just anyone, and you were a tad shy, which made joining clubs a bit difficult. At that moment, your new friends all made eye contact with each other, then looked at you.

“Why not join our volleyball club?” Suga asked. “Shimizu could always use the help. She’s our only student manager.”

Shimizu nodded in agreement, her blue gaze soft. “Your help would be really appreciated. There’s a lot to this job, so having someone to split the work with would be relieving. You can also help me look for someone to take my place when we graduate.”

Later that day you found yourself in the gym being blocked by Sugawara, who was protecting you from two crazed boys whose collars were held back by Daichi. A ginger-haired boy looked at you with curiosity, excitedly introducing himself as Hinata and pointing out the names of the other members on the court (“This is ‘Bakageyama’ and that guy’s ‘Four-eyed Jerk Face’—").

Upon their release (which was granted only after they promised to behave), Tanaka and Noya dashed over to you, tears in their eyes as they held your hands and expressed their gratitude for your presence. “Oh, (y/n), you kind soul, helping Shimizu with the managerial work. Better yet, now we have two cute girls to support us, this is amazing!”

And that’s how you found yourself sitting with your new friends in your living room and feeling grateful for their vibrant personalities, kindness, and acceptance. You couldn’t have asked for a better batch of friends to end your year with. Though, you were most grateful to Sugawara. If not for him, the last several months of your highschool experience may have gone by miserably, with nothing special to note and no new friends to celebrate with. His gentle, understanding nature had done nothing but support you and make you feel welcome. He helped introduce you to a new, comfortable life you had trouble imagining before your arrival to Japan. He dispelled your doubts and fears, instilling in you a newfound confidence in your abilities. It certainly helped that the team was just as supportive and patient with you.

You could recount the events of the past few months that brought warmth to your heart. These people were growing on you, making you feel like you could be yourself more each day. Daichi provided you a sense of security and leadership. Asahi was empathetic, quick to detect your feelings of uneasiness and asking you if you were okay. Shimizu made sure to make you feel welcome as a friend and fellow manager, even inviting you to a café over the weekend to brainstorm ideas on recruiting a replacement (who you both later discovered to be Yachi) and try out some desserts. Tanaka and Noya tried to teach you all the Japanese curse words they knew, initially lying to you about their meanings so they could see the rest of the team’s reactions when you would blurt things out in the middle of practice (Let’s just say that Daichi, Suga, Ennoshita, and Tsukki knew whose fault this was, and Asahi was real shook hearing a string of curse words from your mouth while you sat there, no ill intent emanating from you whatsoever). Ennoshita gave you a comforting, easygoing presence. Tsukki was… Tsukki (LOL). But he could carry on a conversation, often genuinely interested whenever you talked about the culture back in (other country). And you knew he was soft. Hinata was a burst of energy, and you found his bickering with Tsukishima and Kageyama silly and quite precious. You often stayed with Yachi to toss balls to Kageyama late at night, much to his appreciation. Yachi and Yamaguchi were some of the biggest sweethearts on the team, and all you could think about was needing to protect them.

There was definitely something different in your interactions with Sugawara, though. You found yourself closest to him out of everyone. It may have been because he was the first you talked to, or maybe it was because he was one of the most easygoing people you’ve ever met. That, and you found yourself wanting to get closer to him. You wanted to know more about him.

Sugawara chuckled in response. “I suppose you’re right. We wouldn’t have made it this far without everyone,” he said softly, a tinge of fondness showing in his brown eyes. He proceeded to take out his schoolwork and pen, resting his chin in his palm as he read the words across the page of his assignment. Occasionally, you glanced over at him, admiring the way his eyebrows knit together in concentration, and how his hair brushed his cheeks whenever his head shifted in its position. How the grey tips of lashes kissed his bottom eyelids with each flutter of his chocolate hues. You even took a mental note that his lips, currently pursed in thought, were rather smooth and full in appearance.

A rogue thought about how those lips would feel against your own flitted across your mind. It brought a small pang to your chest, and you had to mentally slap yourself back into reality. You noticed these new feelings were starting to become more prevalent the longer you hung around Sugawara. You consulted your friends back home about it, and in their excitement, they insisted you had a crush on this guy (and demanded photos). Heart palpitations, heat-flooded cheeks, covert glances, and a desire for closeness in all aspects possible? All symptoms of infatuation, your personal love doctors concluded. You recalled when these signs first appeared about a month ago, after he offered to walk you home when practice had gone late into the night. Initially you declined, not wanting him to go out of his way when it was already dark outside. However, after seeing the soft look in his eyes as he declared he wanted to ensure you got home safely and that he didn’t mind the walk, your heart couldn’t help but give in and agree.

It was a tranquil night, accompanied only by the sound of crickets chirping and a cool, whispy breeze. About 15 minutes after having left campus, you were both seated on an aged bench at a small park, snacking on recent convenience store purchases to satisfy your growling stomachs. A comfortable silence settled in the air. The nightly surroundings were illuminated by the gentle glow of several nearby lampposts and stars that burned lightyears away.

Your gaze followed the tracks of a small bug crawling across the sidewalk in front of your feet. It skittered soundlessly against the pavement, eventually disappearing in the security of a bush. A gentle sigh took hold of your attention, and your eyes flickered over to your friend, who was peering up at the star-dusted evening sky.

“Do you know what you’re doing after graduation?” he asked, a hint of wonder in his voice.

You shook your head. “No clue, to be honest. You?”

He pursed his lips and took a sidelong glance at you before focusing back upwards. “Well, I’ve always wanted to be a teacher…”

“Seems fitting. Your Japanese lessons have been really helpful,” you pointed out, smiling.

The tips of his lips curved upwards as well. “Really? I’m glad. You’ve improved a lot, too. You’re a quick learner.”

“Heh, well I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Another comfortable silence fell upon you two before he spoke again. “I was thinking about how to keep in touch with everyone after we left, and how it’s a shame we’re leaving so soon after you arrived. I would’ve liked to know you better, too, but there’s only a few months left...”

His genuine words left a rosy tinge on your cheeks. As you were thinking of a response, you looked down, noticing how close your hand lay next to his. Heartrate quickening, you stammered, “Y-Yeah, I wish we had more time, too.. T-To hang around each other, I mean. But graduation doesn’t have to mean goodbye, right?”

“That’s true... You always know just what to say, you know that, (y/n)?” he turned his gaze on you and held out an extended pinky. “Promise to talk to me after graduating, then?”

You rolled your eyes playfully and huffed in amusement. Taking your own pinky and intertwining it with his, you nodded. “So long as you keep your end of the promise, too.”

“Of course.”

Sugawara’s voice brought you out of your momentary flashback. “(Y/n)? Can I ask you a question?”

Blinking your previous thoughts away and calming the warmth on your cheeks, you responded, “What’s up?”

He slid his assignment closer to you, pointing at a section he was having trouble with. “Here. I’m not sure if I’m doing this correctly..”

You leaned in, scooching towards him and closing in on the gap between you. Focused on the homework, you failed to notice how the brush of your shoulders made Sugawara’s body stiffen slightly. With your proximity, your scent easily wafted to his nose, and he could observe the closer details of your appearance. The hair tucked behind your ear exposed your cheekbone, looking soft to the touch. Your determined hues scanned the page, and he could visualize your thinking through your small, occasional self-nods. You looked cute and comfortable in the casual hoodie you wore, bringing him a strange, mixed sense of bashfulness and ease. His mind wandered, trying to envision how you would look if you wore any of his jackets, but his thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of your sweet voice and scribbles against paper.

“It sounds great, Suga! I just made a note there on how you can fix it; otherwise, it should be okay,” you gave him a reassuring smile as you slid his work back to him. You, however, didn’t shift back to your original position and instead stayed seated mere inches from the boy. Not that he minded, but…

“O-Oh, alright, thanks!”

It made concentrating during the rest of the study session a little difficult.

Occasionally you did get up, helping mostly the first and second years with some of their English assignments. His eyes would secretly (but c’mon, everyone but Hinata and Kageyama could tell) follow your figure, admiring the way you looked as you interacted happily with the others and did whatever you could to assist them. Yet you always returned to the same spot, near Suga. Close enough that everyone else on the team took notice (if they haven’t already), relayed the information via mental telephone, and secretly agreed to depart a bit earlier than they had anticipated.

“Oh, you guys are leaving already?” you asked everyone as they were packing up their belongings.

They all nodded in response, offering up their reasons for leaving earlier than the original time you set, which ranged from, “My parents wanted me home for dinner” to “My sister’s wasted and locked out of the house, nobody’s home—” (u good der Saeko)

Standing at your doorway, you waved to your friends, sending them off with a “I’ll see you at school!” as they waved back and filed out of your home. Looking over to Suga, who was still standing beside you, you wondered, “Oh, you’re staying?”

“Oh, yeah! I was surprised to see everyone leave so soon, but I was planning to head home in another hour. B-But I can go now if you need me to..!” he answered a bit shakily, waving around his hands in small, bashful gestures.

You shook your head and you waved your hand dismissively. “It’s okay, you’re more than welcome to stay for however long you need to.”

Settled back in the common area, you both tried to resume your schoolwork, but to no avail. Groaning, you leaned back, using your arms to support you from behind. “I’m tired of workingggggg.”

He sighed in agreement, resting an elbow on the table and propping up his head in a closed fist. “Same. Do you want to do something else?”

“Hmm..” you pondered aloud. “Do you want to see my room?”

Shrugging and responding with a “why not?”, you both stood up, leaving the common area to go to your room. You opened the door and stepped inside, Suga closely trailing behind you.

“Welcome to my room. Make yourself cozy,” you insisted as you sat on your bed and pat the spot next to you. He took your offer, taking a seat beside you and looking around your bedroom in curiosity.

“Something about this place really seems like you, (y/n).”

You raised an eyebrow at his comment. “Is it the messy pile of clothes in that basket or the neat desk I cleaned up this morning?”

He chuckled and shook his head. “I suppose you could say those are part of it. I just meant there’s a lot to you that you should feel comfortable sharing with others. People are complex and there’s so many sides to a person we discover along the way. I remember how timid you were in our first weeks of knowing each other, and now you’re getting along great with everyone and work hard to improve everyday. You were able to overcome a stressful repeat of entering highschool, but this time in another country, and adapted just fine! Your kindness and determination is admirable.”

Twiddling with your fingers, you felt a sheepish grin form on your face. “Aha, you’re too kind, Suga. You know I couldn’t have made these friends or adjust so well without your help. I was too worried about talking to anyone until you came up to me, so… Thank you.”

You risked a glance towards the boy, finding his chocolate gaze already set on you. If none of your interactions in the past month had set your heart ablaze, then certainly this moment would take the cake. Sugawara’s eyes flickered downwards briefly in a moment of hesitance, then locked again onto yours with a hint of an undetectable emotion lurking behind those irises.  Neither of you could bring up any words to say. The only sounds present were the soft hums of your breathing and the low creak of your bed as you found yourselves shifting your weight in order to inch closer to one another.

His mind flooded with a cacophony of emotions, from crippling nervousness to an allure for risk-taking. He could barely come to terms with the current situation and what might happen. Maybe he was overthinking it. Surely being this close face-to-face with someone who you just happen to like doesn’t automatically mean they like you back and want to kiss you just as much. Perhaps you were just leaning in to rest your head on his shoulder; after all, you did seem tired from the events of today. Or, you were scooting close for a better look at his face so you could point out, “hey, you got a little something on your face.” Perhaps a crumb from the cracker he had earlier?

But when he took note of the way your eyes fluttered shut, eyelashes caressing the tops of your dusted cheeks, his doubts began to waver. Maybe this was the chance he’s been seeking out lately. Once Daichi deciphered Sugawara’s affections for you, eventually the whole team found out and began to silently root for him. Thankfully, despite their blatant attempts to help him out, you hadn’t noticed a thing. It made him wonder whether you were oblivious, or just didn’t like him, or both. However, in this moment, when it appeared as though maybe you returned his feelings, he felt he should—as Tanaka would say—shoot his shot.

A sudden knock on the door sent you both jumping 5 feet away from each other. Frazzled and wide-eyed, you choked out a weak, “H-Hello?” in response to the interruption. The door opened, revealing your parent/guardian, who peeked inside.

“Dinner’s ready. Would you like to stay and have it with us?” they were asking Suga.

Heart still racing from the fear that gripped it, he blinked in surprise. He piped out a polite no thank you, reasoning that he didn’t want to intrude.

“Nonsense, we’re happy to have you. Come soon.”

They closed the door and left, leaving you two in an awkward silence that was soon interrupted by the sound of your cough. “We should, uh, get going…”

Standing up, you reached for the door with Suga in tow. The tension in the air remained between the two of you throughout dinner. Nevertheless, Sugawara was able to leave a good impression on your family by being a good conversationalist, even earning a few laughs from your parent/guardian. It made your heart swell at how natural it was for him to be able to get along with others.

After dinner ended and he packed his things, you stepped outside with him to send him off, closing the door behind you. He was about to salute you with a “thanks for having me over” when you gave him a peck on the cheek so sudden that he didn’t have time to react before you were already making your way back into your house.

“Thanks for coming, Suga! I’ll see you at school! Let me know when you get home!” you exclaimed animatedly, shutting the door quickly to hide your embarrassment from your sudden actions. You leaned your back against it, instantly regretting what you did with tightly shut eyes. ‘Oh gawd how am I gonna face him at school tomorrow dhefjkg.’

But on the other side of the door, Suga stood dumbfounded, hovering a hand over the area your lips had touch. Though highly embarrassed, he felt a rush of elation pass over him like a humongous wave that never stopped crashing against the shores.

He was starting to really think it was a good idea to introduce himself to the cute new girl in class. Nice one, Suga.

[elenothar]

Tolkien Gen Week Drabble #6 - Finrod learning the language of Men

Written for @tolkiengenweek. The sixth of my vaguely connected seven character studies of Finrod Felagund, who I have far too many feelings about.

DAY SIX: group dynamic

It had taken Finrod three weeks to become fluent enough in this language of men to communicate with them on a meaningful level.

The first week had mostly consisted of him pointing at things listening carefully to the corresponding word. That process had brought surprising amounts of joy to everyone in the camp, but particularly the young ones. For several days, Finrod was often surrounded by a gaggle of children, enthusiastically pointing at everything they could see and shouting words. They were hard not to adore, particularly for an elf – he couldn’t even remember the last time he had seen this many children in one place. Even in peaceful Aman, elves rarely had many children close together.

So he indulged them, even when the words started repeating, since there were only so many novel things to point at or mime easily. And while they laughed when his pronunciation of terms was strange, they did so joyfully, without malice.

Once a day, while most of the humans slept, Finrod settled himself under a tree and walked through the memories of his day and sorted through all the words he had learned until he started understanding the structure of different words, could differentiate nouns and verbs by their endings and put together much of the conjugations and declensions of this mannish language.

The next week was dedicated to more abstract concepts and required many gestures and broken sentences from him, trying to explain his meaning with the limited vocabulary he’d already acquired. Most of the children lost interest then, since many of those words were new to them, too, but some lingered in his presence while he talked to their elders.

One little girl, distantly related to Balan, whom Finrod had met first, asked shyly whether she might braid his hair, and that day Finrod walked around with flowers woven into a slightly lop-sided braid that fell over his shoulder.

Sometimes he was distracted from his linguistic studies by requests for music, which he was always happy to indulge. Whenever he sang and played the harp, Balan’s people gathered around him and listened with rapt attention, like their own music could not compare.

In the third week, Finrod worked on mastering the pronunciation – he would always sound “elvish” compared to any human speaking it, or so Balan told him with a smile (though he said it was a good thing, and then entirely failed to explain what he meant by it), but not to the extent that he should fear laughter. Now that his vocabulary had grown, he could also ask about aspects of grammar that he hadn’t been able to deduce on his own, though often the answer was incomprehension of the question. For Balan’s people language just was – they didn’t bother giving aspects of it names like the Eldar had.

In fact, his rapid learning had caused more than a little awe. Balan informed him that it was not uncommon for other men to need a year or more to grasp a language they had not spoken from childhood fully, and Finrod was well on his way within weeks.

When he asked around, others just shrugged and said they’d chalked it down to yet more of his elvish strangeness.

Balan, for his part, was still determined to learn Finrod’s tongue – Sindarin would be more useful for him, Finrod reasoned – but his progress was indeed much slower than Finrod’s own, though less hampered by lack of understanding between them.

A full moon journey after Finrod had first encountered the camp of Men, he sat at the fire and sang one of their long songs with them, understanding more than just the spirit of its music.

[thedistantstorm]

Project Compass 25

Read along on AO3 Here

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This time: Thrawn tries to seek out Eli. Grysk poison claims lives aboard the Steadfast.

Next time: Un’hee tires of keeping secrets.

-/

Thrawn prided himself on his commitment and duty, his ethos as a warrior. Being back in his preferred type of position, under a worthy leader no less, was the homecoming he’d been waiting for. He did not mind being planetside, but his home was among the stars, aboard a ship, facing the enemy, poised for battle.

The crew of the Steadfast was eager to prove themselves to him, and there were no hiccoughs or bumps with having a human aboard the bridge - Jedi or otherwise - under Ar’alani’s watchful gaze. They, having experience working together, had an easy adjustment period, and Thrawn’s time away from direct command left better equipped to suggest rather than command his CO when he felt deviations from her orders appropriate. She didn’t indulge him often, and they certainly debated - sometimes in raised voices or dragged away into a conference room - many things. It was a challenge. More than that, it was rewarding.

But something was missing.

Ezra’s words had stayed with Thrawn. Thrawn knew Ivant was still on this ship. So why hadn't he seen him?

Thrawn felt an almost compulsive need to see his now former commanding officer. Ar'alani had mentioned during their discussion that she had recommended him for commendations again and been obstinately denied. It surprised her, but it said something about the state of the Admiralty and Aristocra. The Aristocra had begrudgingly agreed to a promotion for him. The Admiralty had rejected it outright, believing that Ar'alani's human officer deserved punishment, not reward.

If not for the more sinister reasons behind their refusal, Thrawn would have been glad for it. Right now, for the first time in their careers, they were on even ground.

It wasn't long before he found an in.

The Steadfast, despite being a large ship, had very tightly knit groups of officers, though the majority of the bridge crew did find themselves on opposite ends of whatever Aristocra squabble was on the agenda that cycle. Thrawn had expected to hear from the Navigators, but neither Un'hee or Vah'nya - both of whom were reportedly also still aboard the ship - had been anywhere to be seen. Admiral Ar'alani would not speak of any of them, and her replies to Thrawn's admittedly mild inquiries were met with tight lips.

The officer wasn't anything special. In fact, he was rather ordinary. Gossiped with the rest of the officers, was typically in the officer's lounge after hours drinking with the rest of the staff. But, he’d traded stories about Captain Ivant’s early days in the CDF with the rest of the officers. With him back on the ship, it was a means of taking credit for his part in the making of the man, obviously. He was older and towards the end of his career. Respectful enough but hardly looking for an expansion in his duties.

And he’d spoken within earshot of Faro.

Junior Commander Faro, who just so happened to find herself in Ar’alani’s shadow when she wasn’t off gathering intel. “Senior Commander Cinsar,” She mentioned to Thrawn casually one evening when she’d been leaving the mess as he’d entered with Ezra one step behind him.

His eyebrows had gone up, but Faro hadn’t said anything else. She hadn’t needed to. The slightest warmth in her usually deadpan gaze, the smallest quirk of her lips said it for her. She knew what he was looking for. He was hardly transparent, that much he was sure of. Outside of his inquiry to Ar’alani, he hadn’t mentioned Ivant, Un’hee, or Vah’nya despite his curiosity.

However, regardless of his well-concealed emotions, Ezra was concerned, which meant the young Jedi would leave no possible lead or ally alone, rallying them to his cause. Thrawn had no idea what his former protege and current… ward (protege came to mind, but he dismissed it) managed to discuss while he was out of commission. Ezra hadn’t been forthcoming on most of it, citing it ‘boring Imperial-speak’ and he’d be damned if he asked Faro for her recount of events He didn’t care to know that badly, nor did he care to give any more information to any more third parties.

He didn’t begrudge the fact that he had these emotions. Emotions and motivations could be powerful tools if utilized correctly so long as one was cognizant of both the potential strengths and weaknesses that came with them. Presently, his desire to know if he’d been correct was a far safer topic when compared to what he’d do if that was the truth. If Vanto was being censured, as his… subconscious self had so helpfully informed Eli (and unknowingly, Ezra), what was the nature of such a thing? That was what Thrawn wanted to know.

So, as if it were an innocent coincidence, he chose to sit at the same table as the Senior Commander, one seat left between them, and Ezra blissfully unaware across the table. Ezra asked a question, and his verb conjugation - while improving - was just suboptimal enough to draw Cinsar’s attention.

Thrawn saw pathways in the conversation, but he was content to let Ezra carry them while he supplemented the precise dialogue necessary to lay his subtle trap.

-/

Meticulously plotting a way for their paths to cross was, in the end, unnecessary. Three days after chatting up Commander Cinsar, Thrawn’s fellow captain made his way to the bridge midway through the second shift. He held a datapad in his hands, but made no effort to consult it. Instead, he carefully extracted Commander Velbb from his conversation with the Admiral about whatever complaint he’d had this hour and pulled Ar’alani aside for a quiet conversation.

Thrawn had been so preoccupied by the sight of russet skin and golden-brown hair in a sea of blue and black that he’d all but missed the appearance of Un’hee.

In an unorthodox move, she marched up to him wrapping her arms around his middle in a hug, her sharp chin digging in just south of his diaphragm. She tipped her head back to look up at him. The look in her eyes reminded him of that night, months ago, when she had sought both he and Ezra out for comfort. It was that alone that kept him from stepping back and out of her embrace. Instead, albeit awkwardly, he patted her back.

"You are back to normal?" She asked. "No lasting effects?"

He nodded, holding her gaze all the while. Still, one non-confirming eyebrow rose in increasing concern for her very affectionate outburst. Convinced, she released him, a dark flush lighting up her cheeks in the infrared. Her actions were impulse driven then, Thrawn supposed. "I hear you identified the poison. You have my thanks."

She smiled, her facial heat increasing even more. "It was nothing." She tilted her head, adding shyly, "And congratulations on your promotion, Captain."

"Thank you, Navigator Un'hee." He fixed her with an inquisitive look, more than ready to get back to business. "What brings you to the bridge?"

"I was accompanying Captain Eli," She said, looking back to Ivant and Ar'alani briefly. "Something has happened."

"What?"

She shook her head, and he escorted her to a vacant weapons station for privacy. "He would not tell me," Un'hee admitted. "We have not seen him recently. He has been hidden in his office for days, trying to find where and how things have been happening."

"Do you think he's found something?"

Fearful eyes looked up into Thrawn's, and the child Navigator nodded only once. "There are-"

"With me, Captain Mitth'raw'nuruodo," Admiral Ar'alani ordered. Her tone indicated there was no time to argue.

The Navigator very carefully skirted around Thrawn, rushing back to Vanto's side. The Captain, who Thrawn could tell was positively exhausted, met his gaze. His pink lips quirked the slightest bit upward, and despite the cool professionalism lingering there, something in Eli's expression softened, just for a second. The moment broke as quickly as it came with Un'hee tucking herself under his arm and against his side. Thrawn made a mental note to revisit this moment in his mind's eye later.

Surprisingly, Admiral Ar'alani didn't comment on Un'hee's inherent clinginess. While she certainly had a soft spot for her Navigators, indulging such behavior (on the bridge, no less) was peculiar. He said nothing, however, choosing to observe as the Admiral gave her orders and led them from the bridge.

They passed Bridger and Faro on the way to their destination, both of whom wore matching grim expressions. Un'hee was left in their care, rather unwillingly. Whatever she'd been about to say was silenced with a brief, sharp look from Eli.

When they arrived at their destination, Thrawn understood why the Navigator hadn't been allowed to accompany them. They entered the medical quarter, but instead of turning toward the treatment area, they went to the morgue.

Three male and one female Chiss, their modesty preserved with sheets pulled to their clavicles. Even in death, their faces still held the slightest tension.

"Do not touch them with your bare hands," Ar'alani warned, confirming his suspicions.

"Blue death?" He asked, already suspecting the poison to be to blame.

"You have not seen it," She said. "Our medical reports are-"

Vanto, who had been silent this entire time, already donned gloves and had begun to peel back the sheet on the first of them. Then, he went to each subsequent body and similarly drew their shrouds down to just above the waistline. He stood back. Now, he wouldn't meet Thrawn's gaze. His gaze held hidden anger, and he kept it pointed at the floor.

"There was no time to administer the antidote?" Thrawn asked Ar'alani.

Ar'alani looked to Eli. Tension thickened the air. Eli didn't look up. Thrawn slid his eyes between them, trying to discern the meaning without giving his curiosity away.

"No," Eli said. His voice was worn, subdued. His gaze flicked from Ar'alani, something wordless there, then to Thrawn. "When it's done right, the poison kills quickly. Under ten minutes. The wrong amount takes longer, and causes more pain, as you no-doubt recall."

Ar'alani gave Eli a strong glare about something he'd said. He didn't respond. Interesting, he thought.

"The black spots?" He indicated the mess of acid-formed wounds on one of their chests.

"Where the acid comes close to the surface, almost eating through. It destroys the lung, and eats the bone. Metabolized through skin, and only grows more acidic by the chemical process of breathing. The color is blood and acid, beneath the skin," Ar'alani said.

"Even without an immediately fatal dose, it works quickly," Thrawn said. "I was unable to breathe within two minutes of Commander Wes'lash'andi dosing me with the poison."

Ar'alani hummed. "We are trying to find the reason why they were poisoned." She looked up from one of the bodies to Vanto. "Captain Ivant has been trying to figure out which families are involved. Un'hee's recount of events mentioned Copero. Commander Wes'lash'andi mentioned it to her before you showed symptoms. Considering when it happened, we pulled all of the ship's logs and all data from the shipyard from a month prior to our docking until the day we left."

"He would not be so overt," Thrawn commented. He examined the wounds more closely. They were ugly and odiferous, even despite the harsh chemical-clean smell of the morgue. "It was meant to deceive."

"It was," Vanto agreed. "Which is why I did more than that." He gestured to the datapad tucked between his arm and torso. "There was nothing smuggled in Copero, though that was a hint. He narrowed down our location." The human looked between them. "Commander Slasha was considered neutral as far as politics was concerned. However, he was seeing someone aboard the Steadfast prior to his transfer to the Compass. He gestured to the female Chiss. "Lieutenant Dorn'ati'vano. He talked about her often, and fondly."

Ar'alani sighed. "Her family is loyal to House Inrokini."

"Her grandmother is of that house," Eli confirmed.

"Are you suggesting suicide?" Thrawn asked, frowning.

"Not exactly." Eli sighed, and gave Ar'alani a significant look.

"There are more infiltrators aboard. We believe one group eliminated the other as a means to prevent incrimination."

"And the rest of House Inrokini's representation in the crew?" Thrawn wondered aloud. "That should be where we begin."

"They are here, Mitth'raw'nuruodo,” Ar’alani indicated. “Dead."

Thrawn's expression darkened. "Were they found together?"

"Yes," Ar'alani said.

The Chiss captain very carefully examined the deceased woman's fingernails. "Her fingers are damaged, like she touched the poison directly," He commented mildly. "And yet you insist this is not suicide?"

Eli cleared his throat. “No. This was done intentionally by outside parties.”

“Your evidence, if you please, Captain.”

Ar’alani fixed Thrawn with a look, as if to remind him that he wasn’t Vanto’s commander anymore. Vanto didn’t seem to mind. “The bodies were discovered hours after their death. It’s a little hard to tell what with the poison doing what it does, but they were dead for at least eight hours before they were found, seeing as they didn’t show up for their shifts.”

Thrawn watched Eli intently, waiting for him to expand upon his point. “This would look like a suicide, if one wasn’t aware of what they were working with, or all the details.” The human stood at attention, and despite his obvious exhaustion, cut a very confident, convincing profile. Now was hardly the time for Thrawn to consider attraction, but he could not deny that his fellow Captain’s combination of cool confidence and warm eyes, the way his lips curled around his Cheunh would be devastatingly distracting if there weren’t larger matters at hand.

“And those details?” Thrawn asked, voice low, coiled. Ready to see the patterns in whatever data Vanto had no-doubt collected. From the corner of his eye, Thrawn could see Ar’alani roll her eyes and put her hands on her hips. He didn’t have time to figure out what was exasperating her so.

Eli smiled. It spoke of momentary victory. A benchmark met. “We should have received a transport vessel at the end of the overnight shift. The manifest said it was supposed to deliver back up fuel and shield generators for the next cycle. It was a precautionary shipment. Someone waved it off.”

“These four?” Thrawn indicated the deceased.

“No.” His expression turned grim. “They were informed that the shipment was cancelled by someone else. Their communications, from what we could recover, indicated they were furious about it.” Ivant looked to Ar’alani, who nodded. “And it wasn’t until after their time of death that the ship was deleted from our logs. Whomever was responsible expected us to be tripped up at a quadruple suicide.” Chiss were prideful. Suicide, to them, was not an honorable death, and thus would be treated as an extreme exception, the indicators important to the families of the deceased as it would be considered a blight on their reputation.

Thrawn hardly cared about social stigma. “How did you know a shipment had been deleted? You did not say you pulled future manifests,” He said instead.

“I didn’t,” Eli agreed, shrugging, “Didn’t think I had to. I keep tabs on those automatically.”

Ar’alani said, “Captain Eli’van’to is obsessive about cargo and supply inventory, despite his express wishes to hold a command position,” For the Admiral, such a statement was practically an affectionate jibe. “Who am I to deny him his love of supply analysis?”

[leydoodle]

Ben 10 OC: Cassie Williams HCs

(Messy 10 minute scribble AHAHAHA)

A compilation of all the info I have written so far about Cassie/Mobius. She’s still being improved so some of these might change in the future but the general structure of her storyline is in here....!!

HCs under the cut!

General

Cassie is the granddaughter of Hugo from her mother's side. During his time-travelling journey with Paradox, he discovered the tragic future of Cassie from the abuse of his niece. Unfortunately, he wouldn't be alive by that time in order to save his granddaughter. Upon this realization, Hugo asked a favor from Paradox that if he sees anything bad happening to Cassie, he would take care of her. Many years later, Paradox would fulfill this promise.

Her telekinesis power comes from her father's side of the family. Her DNA came from a tribe that was said to have interacted with angels back in ancient times. In reality, these angels are actually rogue alien species who have come down to Earth and mated with the said group, giving birth to a special group of half-breeds that later on became strong historical figures such as kings, warlords, and many more. As time passed by, the genes of the alien race became much weaker to the point that only their enhanced mind and the ability to use telekinesis remained. Though there are possibly more people who have the DNA, only 14 have been documented so far, with Cassie being the most recent one.

 She was the cause of the infamous 'Mutant Catastrophe' in Bellwood. An event in Ultimate Alien where an upset Cassie wrecked havocked with her newly-discovered powers after getting fed up with the torment she was subjected to in her school. During the mayhem, Ben who was a newly-acknowledged hero at the time, decided to work with an underground organization who focuses on studying mutants, in hopes of saving his best friend. During the event, Ben was heavily conflicted as to whether he should fight his beloved friend or save the people of Bellwood. In the end, he chose to do his duties as a hero at the cost of his best friend's detainment in the organization's lab. Later on during the series, Gwen mentions that the sight of a chained Cassie being taken away is a sight that Ben is still greatly traumatized from.

Prior to Omniverse, the Plumbers were negotiating with the underground organization for Cassie's freedom. By the time of Omniverse, The process ended in the Plumbers' favor and thus was able to get Cassie back (despite some particular arrangements). Ben was greatly relieved from this news and wanted to reconnect with his friend again. Due to how they previously left things between them, Cassie was rather scared of the hero and avoided interacting with him, much to Ben's despair. After Ben's return from his months of banishment during the Frogs of War, they were able to reconcile in the aftermath, with Cassie saying, "Life's too short to be upset at your best friend." Ever since then, Cassie became the third member of Ben and Rook's team.

After her detainment in the underground organization, Cassie has developed an irrational fear against humans, only with the exception of some Plumbers. Her phobia has caused her to only be comfortable around aliens.

 Harangue has sensationalized Cassie as "Bellwood's Mutant Disaster". Due to her affiliation with Ben Tennyson, Cassie is often the subject for the journalist's smear campaign against the hero. His notable point would be that Ben being friends with such a destructive being meant that he could easily choose her side over saving other people. Due to Cassie's past action of causing destruction in Bellwood, people are actually very scared of her and believes that the journalist has a valid point.

Cassie loves to pair her smoothies with powdered sugar donuts. It's a tradition she does everytime she passes by Mr. Smoothy, even after she became a time traveler. As Mobius, she often buys smoothies and donuts during sunrise, when the people of Bellwood are barely awake.

According to Paradox, Cassie is always fated to be linked to a Tennyson in every existing timelines and universe, though he indicated that they won't always be friends.

Ship ( Ben/Cassie = Benssie)

Ben sees Cassie as a reminder of his much more simple life before he became a world-renowned hero. According to him, every moment spent with her was like being a normal kid all over again. Though he liked the powers and capabilities he got ever since he became an omnitrix-holder, being given the responsibility as the universe's hero at such a young age caused him to lose his 'innocence' in a sense. Because of this, he often goes to his childhood best friend to atleast experience being a goofy and geeky teenager for some time before going back into action. Alongside this, Cassie is someone who is very dear to Ben. Having grown up together, she is basically considered a 'family' to the hero. Because of this, Ben is extremely overprotective of Cassie to the point the latter became somewhat dependent on him.

Ever since they were kids, Cassie always had deep feelings for the young hero. It was only until they became teenagers that she realized that her feelings were romantic. However, since this was a point in time when Ben was in a relationship with Julie, she chose to repress and bury her feelings towards him (an action she continued to do so, even in Omniverse).

 At first, Ben saw Cassie as merely a best friend, someone special but not particularly a romantic interest just yet. It wasn't until Cassie got assigned into Ben and Rook's team that the young hero started to develop deeper feelings towards his childhood friend. Afraid of once again hurting his best friend, he decided to hide his feelings. Despite that, he was still very affectionate to Cassie.

Cassie's tarnished reputation and destructive powers is what makes her scared to be around Ben. She knows that he's a hero and that the public greatly trusts him. If anything, she's worried that her being around him is going to make the people turn against the hero. Though she tried to keep her distance away from her Ben, he still ended up chasing her, reassuring that no matter what the public thinks, she's still his dearest friend.

Hints of her 'death' were foreshadowed by Ben 10K during his visit in Let's Do the Time War Again. Upon meeting Cassie once again, he almost became sentimental until Paradox stopped him. After the whole ordeal against the Time Beast, the older Ben asked for a hug from the blonde, which the latter gladly offered. Upon arriving to his original timeline, he can be seen shedding some tears for his best friend and lost love.

Cassie's demise caused Ben so much pain to the point that even after many years it was something he had a hard time recovering from. His longing for Cassie was one of the reasons why the earlier years of his marriage with Kai was messy. After conceiving Ken, Ben made a promise to Kai that he will finally let go of his best friend for the sake of their future. Due to this promise, all pictures and memories of Cassie was locked away for the sake of the hero's family. Ever since then, Cassie's name has been a taboo to the Tennyson family.

Ben and Cassie are both absolute geeks for Sumo Slammers. Their love for the franchise is one of the many things they share a deep connection with. According to Rook, once they start talking about it, the two can go on and on for hours without stopping.

Their playlist consists of the following songs: all about you - taeyeon /  cornelia street - taylor swift / say you won't let go - james arthur / kids in love - mayday parade / cardigan - taylor swift / way back home - SHAUN / i will always think about you - bojack horseman / eight - IU (ft. BTS Suga) / futarigoto - RADWIMPS

Life As Mobius

Cassie's relationship with Professor Paradox can be described as familial-like. Due to the latter's lack of knowledge of his prior life, he sees the young lady as he describes, as "a sister, a daughter, and a granddaughter". Though he may have given her the role of a time traveler, Paradox aims to bring Cassie back to her proper timeline before the effects of time travel makes her fully immortal.  Overall, his purpose of 'adopting' Cassie was to fulfill his promise to her grandfather and his former assistant, Hugo.

Paradox aims to make sure that Cassie has let go of her grudge and massive hatred to herself before bringing her back to her proper timeline. On the other hand, though she knows the consequences of time travelling for so long, Cassie doesn't mind being immortal as long as it means she won't go back to Bellwood. Knowing that this is what she thinks, Paradox hasn't told her about his plans.

 Similar to her mentor, Cassie later on picked up the habit of mixing up verb tenses whenever she's explaining an event that's either to happen or has happened.

She mostly wears a large variety of dresses during her life as Mobius. Her reason for sporting this kind of style is because she wanted to 'be in touch with her feminine side more'. Growing up, Cassie was often deprived of decent clothing and was forced to wear hand-me-downs from Gwen. Though she was given proper clothing during her stay with the Plumbers, she never really knew the feeling of wearing 'pretty dresses'. Since then, she's been obsessed with collecting dresses from different time periods.  

At some point in her time travelling journey, in a certain campsite, she meets a lost child who she decides to help find his parents.  It's later on revealed that the child was a young Ken Tennyson who got strayed away from his parents. When Ben asked who helped him find his way back, his son merely replied with saying, "the lady in the big white dress" obviously referring to Mobius. According to Ken, ever since that encounter, he's started to believe in the supernatural, believing that Mobius was some sort of forest deity.

 After approximately a hundred years worth of adventure, Paradox ended up taking Ken Tennyson under his tutelage after the kid got grounded from using his own omnitrix. At first, this was an idea that Cassie was heavily against, though she was stating that the kid is 'incompetent' though deep inside she was very uncomfortable with taking care of the child of they guy she had always loved. Cassie ended up taking the kid under her wings after seeing his desire in being a hero (which heavily reminded Cassie of her similar childhood ambitions).

 When he was a small child, Ken was curious about the 'Cassie' that people always mentioned to his father. According to him, there was an incident back then when he brought up the name to his father that later on caused a fight between his parents. Ever since that moment, he's disliked the name, stating that it's a name filled with bad memories.

 Since Ben hid all things related to his childhood with Cassie, Ken has never actually seen the face of Cassie. It doesn't help that everytime he travelled to the past as Spanner, she would often be in another place. Due to this, he doesn't know that Mobius is actually the Cassie he's been long curious about.

 Ken sees Mobius as his 'cranky aunt'. His childish and impulsive nature often irritated the time traveler to the point that she would always scold him for being reckless. Despite that, he holds his mentor in high regards due to her intense dedication on heroism. Cassie, on the other hand, sees Ken as the spitting image of Ben,though she sees that the kid has the capabilities to uphold his father's legacy.

 After her thousand years worth of journey as a time traveler, Cassie does end up resolving her long grudge and self-hatred. However, she wasn't too sure of returning to a normal life in Bellwood, due to the fact that the flow of events have been proven to have a much better outcome without her. She's later on convinced by Ben 10,000 (who was brought in by Ken) to come back to his time, which she ends up doing. The outcome of her return remains unknown.

[neocab]

Translating the Cyberpunk Future

I'm a video game translator, and I love my job. It's odd work, sometimes stressful, sometimes bewildering, but it always provides interesting and inspiring challenges. Every project brings new words, slang, and cultural trends to discover, but translating also forces me to reflect on language itself. Each job also comes with its own unique set of problems to solve. Some have an exact solution that can be found in grammar or dictionaries, but others require a more... creative approach.

Sometimes, the language we’re translating from uses forms and expressions that simply have no equivalent in the language we’re translating to. To bridge such gaps, a translator must sometimes invent (or circumvent), but most importantly they must understand. Language is ever in flux. It’s an eternal cultural battleground that evolves with the lightning speed of society itself. A single word can hurt a minority, give shape to a new concept, or even win an election. It is humanity’s most powerful weapon, especially in the Internet Age, and I always feel the full weight of responsibility to use it in an informed manner.

One of my go-to ways for explaining the deep complexity of translation is the relationship between gender (masculine and feminine) and grammar. For example, in English this is a simple sentence:

"You are fantastic!"

Pretty basic, right? Easy to translate, no? NOT AT ALL!

Once you render it into a gendered language like Italian, all its facets, its potential meanings, break down like shards.

Sei fantastico! (Singular and masculine)

Sei fantastica! (Singular and feminine)

Siete fantastici! (Plural and masculine)

Siete fantastiche! (Plural and feminine)

If we were translating a movie, selecting the correct translation wouldn't be a big deal. Just like in real life, one look at the speakers would clear out the ambiguity in the English text. Video game translation, however, is a different beast where visual cues or even context is a luxury, especially if a game is still in development. Not only that, but the very nature of many games makes it simply impossible to define clearly who is being addressed in a specific line, even when development has ended. Take an open world title, for example, where characters have whole sets of lines that may be addressed indifferently to single males or females or groups (mixed or not) within a context we don't know and can't control.

In the course of my career as a translator, time and time again this has led into one of the most heated linguistic debates of the past few years: the usage of the they/them pronoun. When I was in grade school, I was taught that they/them acted as the third person plural pronoun, the equivalent of the Italian pronoun "essi." Recently, though, it has established itself as the third person singular neutral, both in written and spoken English. Basically, when we don't know whether we're talking about a he/him or a she/her, we use they/them. In this way, despite the criticism of purists, the English language has brilliantly solved all cases of uncertainty and ambiguity. For instance:

“Somebody forgot their backpack at the party.”

Thanks to the use of the pronoun "their," this sentence does not attribute a specific gender to the person who has forgotten the backpack at the party. It covers all the bases. Smooth, right? Within the LGBT circles, those who don’t recognize themselves in gender binarism have also adopted the use of they/them. Practically speaking, the neutral they/them pronoun is a powerful tool, serving both linguistic accuracy and language inclusiveness. There's just one minor issue: We have no "neutral pronouns" in Italian.

It's quite the opposite, if anything! In our language, gender informs practically everything, from adjectives to verbs. On top of that, masculine is the default gender in case of ambiguity or uncertainty. For instance:

Two male kids > Due bambini

Two female kids > Due bambine

One male kid and one female kid > Due bambini

In the field of translation, this is a major problem that often requires us to find elaborate turns of phrase or different word choices to avoid gender connotations when English maintains ambiguity. As a professional, it’s not only a matter of accuracy but also an aesthetic issue. In a video game, when a character refers to someone using the wrong gender connotation, the illusion of realism is broken. My colleagues and I have been navigating these pitfalls for years as best we can. Have you ever wondered why one of the most common Italian insults in video games is "pezzo di merda"? That's right. "Stronzo" and "bastardo" give a gender connotation, while "pezzo di merda" does not.

A few months ago, together with the Gloc team, I had the pleasure of working on the translation of Neo Cab, a video game set in a not too distant future with a cyberpunk and dystopian backdrop (and, sadly, a very plausible one). The main character is Lina, a cabbie of the "gig economy," who drives for a hypothetical future Uber in a big city during a time of deep social unrest. The story is told mainly through her conversation with the many clients she picks up in her taxi. When the game’s developers gave us the reference materials for our localization, they specified that one of the client characters was "non-binary" and that Lina respectfully uses the neutral "they/them" pronoun when she converses with them.

"Use neutral pronouns or whatever their equivalent is in your language," we were told.

I remember my Skype chat with the rest of the team. What a naive request on the client's part! Neutral pronouns? It would be lovely, but we don't have those in Italian! So what do we do now? The go-to solution in these cases is to use masculine pronouns, but such a workaround would sacrifice part of Lina’s character and the nuance of one of the interactions the game relies on to tell the story. Sad, no? It was the only reasonable choice grammatically-speaking, but also a lazy and ill-inspired one. So what were we to do? Perhaps there was another option...

Faced with losing such an important aspect of Lina’s personality, we decided to forge ahead with a new approach. We had the opportunity to do something different, and we felt like we had to do the character justice. In a game that's completely based on dialogue, such details are crucial. What's more, the game's cyberpunk setting gave us the perfect excuse to experiment and innovate. Language evolves, so why not try to imagine a future where Italian has expanded to include a neutral pronoun in everyday conversations? It might sound a bit weird, sure, but cyberpunk literature has always employed such gimmicks. And rather than take away from a character, we could actually enrich the narrative universe with an act of "world building" instead.

After contacting the developers, who enthusiastically approved of our proposal, we started working on creating a neutral pronoun for our language. But how to go about that was a question in itself. We began by studying essays on the subject, like Alma Sabatini's Raccomandazioni per un uso non sessista della lingua italiana (Recommendations for a non-sexist usage of the Italian language). We also analyzed the solutions currently adopted by some activists, like the use of asterisks, "x," and "u."

Siamo tutt* bellissim*.

Siamo tuttx bellissimx.

Siamo tuttu bellissimu.

I’d seen examples of this on signs before, but it had always seemed to me that asterisks and such were not meant to be a solution, but rather a way to highlight the issue and start a discourse on something that's deeply ingrained in our language. For our cyberpunk future, we wanted a solution that was more readable and pronounceable, so we thought we might use schwa (ə), the mid central vowel sound. What does it sound like? Quite familiar to an English speaker, it's the most common vowel sound. Standard Italian doesn’t have it, but having been separated into smaller countries for most of its history, Italy has an extraordinary variety of regional languages (“dialetti”) and many of them use this sound. We find it in the final "a" of "mammeta" in Neapolitan, for instance (and also in the dialects of Piedmont and Ciociaria, and in several other Romance languages). To pronounce it, with an approximation often seen in other romance languages, an Italian only needs to pretend not to pronounce a word's last vowel.

Schwa was also a perfect choice as a signifier in every possible way. Its central location in phonetics makes it as neutral as possible, and the rolled-over "e" sign "ə" is reminiscent of both a lowercase "a" (the most common feminine ending vowel in Italian) and of an unfinished "o" (the masculine equivalent). The result is:

Siamo tuttə bellissimə.

Not a perfect solution, perhaps, but eminently plausible in a futuristic cyberpunk setting. The player/reader need only look at the context and interactions to figure it out. The fact that we have no "ə" on our keyboards is easily solved with a smartphone system upgrade, and though the pronunciation may be difficult, gender-neutrals wouldn't come up often in spoken language. Indeed, neutral alternatives are most needed in writing, especially in public communication, announcements, and statements. To be extra sure our idea worked as intended and didn't overlook any critical issues, we submitted it to a few LGBT friends, and with their blessing, then sent our translation to the developers.

Fast forward to now, and the game is out. It has some schwas in it, and nobody complained about our proposal for a more inclusive future language. It took us a week to go through half a day's worth of work, but we're happy with the result. Localization is not just translation, it's a creative endeavour, and sometimes it can afford to be somewhat subversive. To sum up the whole affair, I'll let the words of Alma Sabatini wrap things up:

"Language does not simply reflect the society that speaks it, it conditions and limits its thoughts, its imagination, and its social and cultural advancement." — Alma Sabatini

Amen.

[ltworld]

Revelation, Coronavirus, and the Mark of the Beast: How Should Christians Read the Bible’s Most Fascinating Book? Part 1

Kevin DeYoung

Whenever there is a cataclysmic global crisis—be it war, rumors of war, or a novel coronavirus—we see a sharp uptick of interest in the book of Revelation. While paying attention to the Bible is always a good thing, Revelation is too often used (by Christians and non-Christians) in a way that does less to edify the body of Christ and more to stoke the fires of wild speculation and unfounded conspiracy theories.

It may be helpful, then, to understand what kind of book Revelation is and how to make sense of imagery like the mark of the beast. We’ll get to the mark of the beast in the third and final installment of this short series. But before we get there I want to take a couple posts to look at what Revelation is all about and how we should interpret this not-as-strange-as-it-seems book.

Big Picture

Probably no book of the Bible has been harder for Christians to understand and, as a result, produced more bizarre theology than the book of Revelation. Although it is called “revelation,” it has been anything but a revelation for many Christians. It is a closed book for many of us, not correcting, not teaching, not rebuking, not training in righteousness like all Scripture should.

I remember teaching through part of Revelation for a Sunday school class several years ago and telling my mom about it over the phone. She said something like, “Kevin, you’re not going act like you have everything figured out are you? John Calvin didn’t even write a commentary on Revelation. You don’t know more than John Calvin, do you?” It is true that Calvin did not write a commentary on Revelation (one of the few books he didn’t write on), and it’s true that I don’t have everything figured out. But most of Revelation can be understood and applied if we will take the time to study it.

In fact, the entire book of Revelation can be summed up in one word: nike. Nike is the Greek word for victory. It occurs one time in the New Testament—1 John 5:4 states, “This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith.” Another form of the word (nikos) appears four other times, three times in 1 Corinthians 15 (e.g., “Death has been swallowed up in victory;” “He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ”). The verb form, nikao (meaning to conquer, to overcome, to triumph), occurs more frequently—28 times. Seventeen of those occurrences, more than in the rest of the New Testament combined, are in Revelation.

Revelation is the story of the Devil trying to conquer the church, but the church overcomes the Devil and the world because she belongs to the Lord who has won for us the victory (Rev. 5:5; 17:14). The book of Revelation gives instruction for the believer on how to conquer instead of being conquered, how to triumph instead of being trampled, and how to be an overcomer instead of a succumber. That’s why each of the seven letters to the seven churches concludes with “to the one who conquers . . .” If we cave and give in to persecution and give into worldliness and give into the Devil’s temptations, we will lose. But if we overcome through trial and suffering and seeming irrelevance, we will win (Rev. 21:6-7). That’s where history is heading, and that’s the big idea of Revelation.

(Possible) Map for the (Seeming) Madness

There is no one inspired way to understand the structure of Revelation. When studying this book in-depth several years ago, I found 11 different outlines, which suggests there probably isn’t one obvious structure we’re supposed to see.

One simple approach is to see Revelation as divided into two main sections. Chapters 1-11 introduce the story of God’s triumph, and chapters 12-22 explain the story in greater detail, this time unveiling in more depth the role of evil through the beast, the false prophet, and the whore of Babylon.

Another way of approaching the book is to divide it into four main sections, each marked off by the phrase “what must soon take place” or “what must take place after this.”

Rev. 1:1 The revelation of Jesus Christ, which God gave him to show his servants the things that must soon take place.

Rev. 1:19 Write therefore the things that you have seen, those that are and those that are to take place after this.

Rev. 4:1 “Come up here, and I will show you what must take place after this.”

Rev. 22:6 “And the Lord, the God of the spirits of the prophets, has sent his angel to show his servants what must soon take place.”

The language in these four passages comes from Daniel 2 and indicates that Old Testament prophecy is already and not yet completed in Revelation.

There’s another way to outline the book into four main sections. This approach marks out the times John says he was caught up in the Spirit.

Rev. 1:10 I was in the Spirit on the Lord’s Day, and I heard behind me a loud voice like a trumpet.

Rev. 4:2 At once I was in the Spirit, and behold, a throne stood in heaven, with one seated on the throne.

Rev. 17:3 And he carried me away in the Spirit into a wilderness.

Rev. 21:10 And he carried me away in the Spirit to a great, high mountain, and showed me the holy city Jerusalem coming down out of heaven from God.

By this reckoning, Revelation consists of four main visions that John saw while he was in the Spirit on four different occasions.

Yet one more way of approaching the book—and the approaches are not mutually exclusive—is to look for sets of sevens. Everyone recognizes that seven is a crucial number in Revelation, and that there are at least four sets of sevens: seven letters, seven seals, seven trumpets, and seven bowls. This much everyone agrees on. But from here things get less clear. Since there are plainly at least four sets of sevens, many scholars have wondered if we are meant to see seven sets of sevens. I am convinced there are seven sets of sevens, but I certainly wouldn’t be dogmatic about it. My outline, which is similar to outlines I’ve seen from others, looks like this:

Prologue: 1:1-8 I. Seven letters: 1:9-3:22 II. Seven seals: 4:1-8:5 III. Seven trumpets: 8:6-11:19 IV. Seven visions: 12:1-15:4 V. Seven bowls: 15:5-16:21 VI. Seven judgments: 17:1-19:10 VII. Seven last things: 19:11-21:8 VIII. The beautiful bride: 21:9-22:21

You’ll notice there is an eighth section that is not a set of seven. An eighth section makes sense because eight is often the number of new creation in the Bible (Jesus rose on the eighth day/first day of a new week, eight people started the new humanity after the flood, sons were to be circumcised on the eighth day), and this eighth section is about the new heavens and new earth. But there is nothing inspired about the outline above. It’s just one way of making the book more manageable and putting together some possible patterns with some obvious ones.

Our Interpretive Lens

The last thing I want to do in this post is look at the various ways Christians have understood Revelation. There are four main schools of thought.

The first school of interpretation is called preterism. The preterist approach teaches that a large portion of the book of Revelation was fulfilled in the first century, specifically in the destruction of the temple in AD 70. Further, most of the prophecies in Revelation were fulfilled by the fall of the Roman Empire in the fifth century.

The strength of the preterist school is that it puts Revelation in its original context. Revelation was written to first-century Christians with first-century metaphors and imagery and referents. If we jump to the 21st century and ask, “What does this mean for me?,” we will almost surely get the wrong answer. We have to first ask, “What did this mean to them, to John’s original audience?”

Preterism is not without weaknesses. First, some preterists try to find a single, specific fulfillment to the prophecies of Revelation when it seems more likely that John’s visions often portray generalized spiritual battles and struggles that occur throughout the ages. Second, full-blown preterists argue that all of the end-time events, like the second coming and the last judgment, actually were fulfilled by AD 70. This does not seem in keeping with the cataclysmic language used at the end of each sequence.

The second school of interpretation is called historicism. The historicist reads Revelation as a straightforward, sequential roadmap of history. Revelation is seen as predicting any number of key historical figures and events from Napoleon to Hitler to the European Union to the United Nations.

The strength of historicism is that it makes Revelation relevant for all Christians. It focuses our attention not on the fall of the temple or on the Roman Empire but on the way of the church in the world.

But besides this strong point, historicism is the worst way to try to understand Revelation. It is full of weaknesses. Let me quickly mention just four.

First, historicism is often anachronistic and takes Revelation out of its original context. I am thinking of those who argued that the country out of the north (from Daniel, not Revelation) must be Russia, or that the locust swarm from Revelation 9 is foretelling a helicopter battalion. These sorts of interpretations completely ignore the imagery of ancient prophecy and the context of the first century.

Second, historicism, with its end-of-the-world predictions and identifications of the beast, has often been demonstrably wrong. During the cold war, people saw Russia in Revelation. A decade ago they saw Iraq. Now they see the coronavirus. In a few years, they will be on to something else. Historicists tend to see Revelation being fulfilled in whatever crisis is pertinent for the day. And then on another day, another group of historicists see that view was wrong and find something completely different.

Third, historicism limits the prophecies of Revelation to one exclusive location or personality instead of allowing that the imagery of Revelation may be well suited to an inclusive number of different figures and times. That is, I think historicists are right to see Revelation unfolding in history, but they are wrong to think that Revelation is uniquely unfolding in one historical moment.

Fourth, historicism is irreducibly subjective. There is simply no objective standard of interpretation. Who’s to say that Hitler was more the beast than Stalin? Or that 666 is a reference to Bill Clinton (as one website I found argues)? Or, as another article maintains, that Ronald Wilson Reagan (six letters in each of his names!) was the beast? It’s all hopelessly subjective. The text ends up saying anything we want it to.

The third school of interpretation is futurism. The futurist reads Revelation (chs. 4-22) as a prophecy solely concerned with the distant future. The events depicted refer to the time involving, or immediately preceding, the end of history. Dispensationalists are futurists (though not all futurists are dispensationalists).

The strength of futurism is that it emphasizes how Revelation speaks to the future, not just about the past. Futurism is right to see that some things in Revelation deal with the final consummation of human history. Futurists are also right to see that the future is moving somewhere, toward the triumph of the Lamb.

But futurism also has weaknesses.

First, if Revelation 4-22 is entirely and only about the distant future, then most of Revelation was barely relevant to its original readers. Sure, it would have helped them see the end of the world, but it really spoke little into their immediate context (when John says Revelation revealed “what must soon take place”).

Second, futurism often assumes a strict sequential chronology. And yet, we cannot assume that what is shown to us in chapter 12 comes in time after what we see in chapter 6. To the contrary, one of the keys to interpreting Revelation is to understand that its visions are recapitulated. So, Revelation gives us a sweep through history in the seven seals, and then does the sweep again in the seven bowls. Revelation comprises overlapping prophecies that go back and forth between the present and the future and are not strictly chronological.

Don’t think of the visions of Revelation as frames from a movie reel running through the light one after the other. Think of the visions as portraits in a gallery. You look at one portrait and get a glimpse of reality, and then you look at the next portrait, and then you walk over to the next room and look at the portraits over there. They are pictures telling the same story and pointing to the same reality, but they aren’t sequential clips from a movie.

The fourth school of interpretation is idealism. The idealist reads Revelation as a symbolic conflict between the forces of good and evil. Revelation, idealists argue, does not point to particular historical figures but depicts the timeless struggle between God and Satan. It interprets Revelation as a series of repeated symbolic pictures, focusing on the church’s triumphant struggle from the first century until the last judgment and the eternal state.

The strength of idealism is that is understands the symbolic nature of Revelation. It realizes that Revelation’s imagery is rooted first in Old Testament language and second in the known world of the first century. The other strength is that it sees behind the first-century context deeper spiritual realities that would outlive and transcend ancient Rome and remain relevant for believers throughout the ages.

The weakness of idealism is that it can at times under-emphasize the fact that all of history is moving somewhere. That is, idealism sometimes sounds vague, as if there were no end point in history as we know it, as if Revelation was just about the struggle between good and evil and not also about the ultimate triumph of Jesus Christ.

Interpret the Book

So what approach do I think helps us best understand Revelation? I think each approach offers something needed. This doesn’t mean that I think every approach is good or that one is not better than another (I’m basically an idealist with a partial preterist bent). But each school of interpretation does offer something important.

With the preterist, we must read Revelation in its immediate context.

With the idealist, we must look at Revelation as a symbolic portrayal of God’s work, most of which can be applied to any historical time.

With the futurist, we must read Revelation with end of history in mind, recognizing that the book depicts, in parts, the second coming, the final judgment, and the eternal state.

And with the historicist, we must understand that the prophecies of Revelation, though they are not limited to one particular occurrence, are fulfilled in time and space.

The best way to defend one’s interpretive grid is to actually interpret the book. But since this is a three-part blog series and not a 50-part sermon series, we will have to settle for just one more post on the subject. In the first three verses, John makes clear that this book is an apocalypse, a prophecy, and a letter. Once we know what each of the terms entail, we will be better equipped to understand the book as a whole and specific imagery like the mark of the beast.

Note: This post was first published through The Gospel Coalition website.

[gendercensus]

Gender Census 2019 - The Full Report (Worldwide)

This is a long post! You can see a summary of the big three questions here.

~

Hi and welcome to this year’s worldwide report based on the 11,242 responses to the Gender Census, which ran from 25th February until 30th March. It was mostly shared on Tumblr and Twitter, with some Reddit and Facebook and no doubt some one-to-one link-sharing too.

You can see the spreadsheet of results in full here, which might be helpful if you need to see graphs or figures in more detail. For the charts and graphs of statistics over time, the summary spreadsheet can be found here.

~

Q1. IDENTITY WORDS

As in previous years, I asked: Which of the following best describe(s) in English how you think of yourself?

Here’s the top 5:

nonbinary - 66.6% (up 6%)

queer - 43.0% (up 40.1%)

trans - 36.6% (up 1.8%)

enby - 31.7% (up 7.2%)

transgender - 30.4% (up 2.5%)

I put queer in bold because it’s new to the list, and the way it’s rocketed to second place is very unusual... and a little suspicious.

The wording of the identity question carefully avoids mentioning gender so that people without genders feel comfortable answering (or not answering), but it’s not really meant to include sexualities. The exception is sexualities that are part of someone’s gender identity, like this comment that someone wrote into the identity checkbox: “femme lesbian (sometimes i feel like lesbian *is* my gender)”

So anyway, last year queer got 2.9% (over the 1% threshold), and I personally know people who feel that their gender is queer, so I added it to the list. Usually when terms are added as checkbox options it might multiply their popularity by about four, but 43% is way too high to be explained by that. Queer is usually used to describe sexuality, so I think perhaps people who identify as queer in terms of their sexuality might have been selecting it too. I’m considering changing it slightly, to something like “queer (as gender identity)” to clarify it for next year. It’s possible that we won’t know if this percentage is due to bad survey design for a year or two.

(Edit: Some feedback on queer and my response to the feedback can be found here.)

Along those lines, several terms were added to the checkbox options this year because they were typed in by over 1% of participants last year:

queer

genderless

demiboy

demigirl

gender non-conforming

There are now 28 terms in the identity checkbox list, and as usual there were people expressing gratitude for the abundance of checkbox options in the identity question. However, there has also been an increase in people entering words into the textboxes that are already in the checkbox list. That means that people are missing or are not able to find the identity words they connect with more than last year, and it doesn’t help that the list is randomised to reduce primacy and recency bias.

Right now I add words to the checkbox list if they reach 1%, and this year for the first time I am considering adding another system for removing words that are not used as much. You can read a blog post I wrote about that here. I concluded based on the results of the 2017 survey (which asked for participants’ ages) that some words that seem to be used less overall are used more often by participants over 30, and since participants over 30 are underrepresented in online surveys generally I will be keeping any word that they enter over 3% of the time even if the word isn’t used as much overall.

Relatedly, I didn’t ask for ages in the survey this year, but I will be collecting information about age in future surveys to make sure that I don’t remove words and accidentally alienate underrepresented age groups. (The age question will be optional and will give age ranges rather than asking for an exact age, so hopefully that won’t make people feel too uncomfortable.)

This year someone complained for the first time that I was excluding words from other languages because I specify “in English” in the question, and if you know me from previous surveys you know that’s the opposite of my intention! Every word entered is counted, and I’m very aware that people use words from other languages while speaking English. So I’m considering rewording the question, but I welcome feedback on this since I’ve never had anyone complain about this issue before and plenty of people already enter non-English words.

And here’s this year’s top 10 words and their popularity over time:

Those two lines shooting up from 2018 to 2019 are two of the words newly added this year: queer and gender non-conforming. That green line starting near the bottom in 2016 and steadily increasing over time is more like what I’d usually expect - that’s enby, which is now up to #4 on the list.

There are no new identity words to add next year; the closest to 1% was butch with 0.7%. However, since I intend to collect information about age and since people often type, for example, “girl but not woman, even though I am not a minor”, I will be splitting girl, woman, man and boy into separate checkboxes next year.

2,021 unique identity words/terms were typed into the “other” textbox, including 413 that were entered more than once. The average number of type-ins for people who actually typed words in was 1.8, and the average words per person overall was 5. Most entered 4 words:

~

Q2: THE TITLE QUESTION

I asked, Supposing all title fields on forms were optional and write-your-own, what would you want yours to be in English? I also clarified that participants should be currently entitled to use it, so they should have a doctorate if they choose Dr, etc.

There were 5 specific titles to choose from, plus a few options like “I choose on the day” and “a non-gendered professional or academic title”. Participants could choose only one, with the goal of finding out what, when pressed, people enter on official records forms and ID.

Here’s our top 5:

No title at all - 33.0% (up 0.6%)

Mx - 31.3% (down 1.3%)

Mr - 8.7% (up 0.2%)

Non-gendered prof/acad. - 5.5% (up 0.1%)

Ms - 4.7% (down 1.0%)

Here’s how that looks compared with previous years:

Mx and no title switched places again for the fifth year in a row! And this year I made a similar graph but without Mx and no title. They always get way more than everything else, and it makes it really hard to see what’s going on in the lower half of the graph!

That rollercoaster of a red line is because in 2018 I specified that “non-gendered professional/academic title” should be one that the participant should be entitled to use, which caused that significant drop.

The most popular five “other” textbox titles were:

M - 28 (0.2%)

Comrade - 17

Sir - 10

Mrs - 9

Ser - 7

As with last year, I invited people who chose “a standard title that is used only by people other than men and women” (2.5% of participants) to optionally suggest titles that they’d heard of. The goal is to find a popular title that is considered exclusive to nonbinary genders the way Mr is generally considered exclusive to men and Ms is to women.

243 people checked the “standard exclusive nonbinary” title option, and here’s everything entered more than once:

Mx - 16

M - 4

Xr - 2

Mrs - 2

Mx is generally considered gender-inclusive by people who are familiar with it, especially if their title is Mx, but it’s high on this list because Mx is very well-known generally. M in French is masculine, but in English it’s not gendered and I assume it’s pronounced “em”? (That seems to be what people have said in the notes, but please do tell me if I’m wrong!) It was also the most entered title in the “other” textbox. Xr is new to me, I’m not sure how it’s pronounced.

~

Q3: PRONOUNS

The fourth question was actually a complex set of questions retained from last year, which started with Supposing all pronouns were accepted by everyone without question and were easy to learn, which pronouns are you happy for people to use for you in English? This was accompanied by a list of pre-written checkbox options. It included “a pronoun set not listed here”. and if you chose that it took you to a separate set of questions that let you enter up to five pronoun sets in detail.

As usual, everything that was a pre-written checkbox option got over 1%.

Here’s the top 5:

Singular they - they/them/their/theirs/themself - 79.5% (up 2.1%)

He - he/him/his/his/himself - 30.8% (down 0.4%)

She - she/her/her/hers/herself - 29.0% (down 1.9%)

None/avoid pronouns - 10.3% (up 0.2%)

Xe - xe/xem/xyr/xyrs/xemself - 7.2% (down 0.2%)

Here’s how that looks over time:

Because singular they, he and she always do better than everything else, let’s look at that chart without them. Every other specific pronoun set got under 8%.

Here’s the top 5 textbox neopronouns, none of which got over 1%:

ne/nem/nemself (singular verbs) - 27 (0.2%)

ve/ver/verself (singular verbs) - 24

ey/em/emself (singular verbs) - 23

ae/aer/aerself (singular verbs) - 22

thon/thon/thonself (singular verbs) - 18

(I’m going by the subject, object and reflexive, because that seems like the best way to collect similar sets together - eyeballing it, the most variations occur in the possessives.)

Half of participants don’t like he or she, and 9% like neither he, she nor they. 695 unique sets of neopronouns were entered by 574 people, of which 84 were entered more than once. The average number of pronouns entered was 2.2, and most people (39%) were happy with one set.

Overall it looks like there are no neopronouns really gaining in popularity, and even the checkbox neopronouns are being used less since 2015.

~

THE QUESTIONS I ASK

What should the third gender option on forms be called? - Still no consensus, but nonbinary is at 2 in 3 people and it does seem to be gradually climbing.

Is there a standard neutral title yet? - Not yet. Mx is still consistently far more popular than all other titles, but just as many nonbinary people want no title at all. It’s really important that activists campaigning for greater acceptance of gender diversity remember to fight for titles to be optional, too.

Is there a pronoun that every nonbinary person is happy with? - No. The closest we have to a standard is singular they, and it’s important for journalists and anyone else with a style guide to allow it. It’s levelled out at about 1 in 5 not being into singular they, and 9% of us don’t like he, she or they pronouns.

Are any of the neopronouns gaining ground in a way that competes with singular they? - No. This year the closest is “Xe - xe/xem/xyr/xyrs/xemself” (7.2%, compared to singular they’s 79.5%). Users of these neopronouns will probably not reach consensus for many years - language and especially pronouns can be very slow to settle and gain ground. Even if one neopronoun does become very commonly used, many will continue to use other neopronouns for a long time to come.

~

THIS YEAR IN REVIEW

Crowdfunding was successful enough that I have a little money leftover for costs next year. We had around the same number of participants as last year, but follower numbers and mailing list subscribers increased, which bodes well for next year.

I made some minor changes to the promotional illustrations to make them more gender-/sex-inclusive, and this year I got no complaints, so that was a good move! However, this year I did see a lot more confusion about who is invited to take part. I think the changes were probably worth it to make sure I’m being as welcoming and inclusive as I can be in the promotional stuff, so hopefully people will err on the side of caution and just jump in.

The way that the new survey software collects information, and my increased knowledge of Google Sheets, mean that I didn’t have to resort to MS Excel at all this year. This is really good, because working with unfamiliar software slows me down a lot! My formulae have been more efficient (thanks to my increasing Google Sheets skillz), so the entire sheet could be processed at once instead of being split into several questions. I’m really happy about that, because it means the entire worldwide results report came out less than 24 hours after the survey closed, instead of... *cough* eight months *cough* ...

I made an executive decision not to do a UK report this year, because the added complication makes it really hard for me to motivate myself. It definitely worked, look at that, it’s only March and the worldwide report is already out! I might still do a UK report, and I will keep collecting UK/not UK info about participants so that I always have that option, but for now I’ll just concentrate on the worldwide report and just do the UK report if I feel like it before 2020. And of course the spreadsheet is available to anyone who wants to download it and play with it, so if someone else wants to make some UK-specific statistics happen that is totally possible.

What I’ll do differently next year

In the identity question, I will keep queer as a checkbox option, but I will specify that it’s a gender. Maybe “queer (as gender identity)”? Feedback welcome on this!

In the pronouns question, I’ll change the wording of “none/avoid pronouns” so that it’s clear that it includes just using someone’s name. That’s because a lot of people tried to enter their names as neopronoun sets to express that, and I want to avoid people entering identifying information.

I will ask about age, to make sure that people over 30 are represented by checkbox options. Typically only about 10% of participants are over 30 so I want to make sure as many as possible are comfortable taking part. I’ll group ages into sets of 5 years (21-25, 26-30, etc.) to reduce risk of people being identified, and because entering an exact age probably feels a little more uncomfortable.

After 2020, any identity word, title or pronoun that is entered by less than 3% of participants and less than 3% of participants over 30 can be removed in future surveys. (I am a little concerned about this part, because it’ll make the work more complicated for me, and more work means more risk of epic procrastination. I’ll do my best!)

I’ve finally admitted to myself that I need to separate man and boy, and woman and girl. Currently it’s “woman (or girl if younger)” and “man (or boy if younger)”, and every year plenty of people skip those options in the checkboxes and type in “girl (but not woman even though I’m not a minor)” or something like that, and next year I’ll be asking about age so that’ll be an easy way to determine if there are any adults who are comfortable with one and not the other. This will increase the number of checkboxes to 30, which is pretty unwieldy and will make it harder yet again for people to find their words and increase the rate at which people drop out of the survey, so I’m glad for the under-3% checkbox removal threshold that I’m introducing from 2021 onwards.

Closing thoughts

I slipped up on a couple of things this year (ambiguity over the word “queer”, for example) - but overall I’m pretty impressed with how well I handled it all compared to last year. (I had recently moved house and was trying to rebuild my life, so I didn’t have a lot of spare energy in 2018!)

As always, I’m excited to pore through all your written answers and feedback, and I’m really grateful to everyone who shared the survey link! There were hundreds of RTs and thousands of reblogs, which never ceases to amaze me. Thank you everyone for sharing a small linguistic part of yourselves with me, I hope putting it all together helps you and makes a positive difference to the world!

See also

A list of links to all results, including UK and worldwide, and including previous years

The mailing list for being notified of next year’s survey

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