#me. like i just like that he could have won but didnt bc he was trying to challenge himself every step of the way :))

[martyrbat]

habeas corpus – detective comics #1086

(ID in alt!)

[boxwinebaddie]

heeeeello party people!~ super bacteria uncle nina here using my silly tumblr to cope again ( my culture came back and it was...suuuuper fucking bad! like i knew it would be, lol! awesome! <3 thanks, god! )

but we're not thinking about, what were gonna think about is the time that ravenstan got a little Too tipsy topsy turvy on jerseyky boxwine,

( it's the cab sav one, fyi. i can't drink on all these Fucknut Antibiotics - they prescribed me the wrong one and i took it, if you can believe it; i luv doctors - can y'all believe i did this shit Sober? unREAL, brohs! )

and was on tiktok live, the dawn spawns of the world convinced him to do the 'White Boy Of The Month' filter bc he's too impressionable and what can i say;

The Man LOVES White Boys. ;) xxx

( helpsksdj )

so, he started doing it and was like 'nooooo, is /KYLE/ on this one?!?! You're Joking.' ( everyone said 'JK <3' because they all think they're jimmy valmer stand-up sit-down comedians, smh...but no, naught joking, Actually JK bc in my ncau-niverse, cd and the blondies gang are celebrities, so naturally they’re on A Lot of social filters )

so he was GOING to save The No.1 slot...for the no.1 slut ( if you will, ) my ginger gringo king, ceo of dark academic debauchery and bottom feeding ;), new jay's finest - literally - kyley b matthew broflovski; <33 ( buuuut! he's a reformed manhoe; so watchya mowtH! )

buuuuut x2 ( and i'd say it's a big butt, but it's not, it's ravenstan, so it's flatter than the sidewalk; luh you flat stanley ) Gaydhd Won Again and tipsy ravenstan got distracted by all the FINE ASS WHITE MEN and started getting philosophical about it ( that man put a lil too much #thot into those placings; he was born for it, soz )

had about two spots left ( the top and bottom spots; i am laughing ) figured that there was almost 'No Chance!' he would get jersey...

PUT /MATTHEW! GRAY! GUBLER!/ AT ONE ( Immaculate Taste, btw! he also put jacob elordi at number two because he is a fucking genius and that...really tells you Everything you need to know about my stan. like tall, could probably be a runway model, intellectual, kind of a jackass, stays fitted, accent or eccentric manner of speaking...yeah )

-- BUT HE WANTED TO BE CLEAR, HE HAD TO SPECIFY THAT HE WAS SPECIFICALLY REFERRING TO /DR. SPENCER REID/ OF CRIMINAL MINDS. WHEN I TELL YOU HE HAS NO IDEA WHO MGG IS BUT HE HAS SEEN EVERY EPISODE OF CRIMINAL MINDS SEVERAL TIMES. IT’S LIKE...HIS /FAVORITE/ FKN SHOW. AND HE DOES HAVE A FAT CRUSH ON REID. YES, I DOES TRACK; I KNOW. )

and RIGHT when he was rolling for the very last spot ranking on the filter ( that's the BOTTOM, i repeat, THE B/O/T/T/O/M of the tierlist )

...hE GOT KYLE

FUCKING

BROFLOVSKI

and had to place him at /TEN/.

-- riiiiiiight as Kyle /FUCKING/ Broflovski came out of the kitchen in the dorky ass star of david apron that sheila got him for hannukah, with his hair up and everything, holding a fork so stan could taste...

...T-THE PASTA HE JUST MADE HIM FOR DINNER BECAUSE HE'S A SWEET BEAUTIFUL /ANGEL/....and i'm talking The Very First Bite Of EXTREMELY DELICIOUS KYLE Pasta that he put ZUCCHINI IN JUST FOR STAN BECAUSE HE IS ( what? ) AN ANGEL!! FROM hEAVEN!!!!! AND THE WHITE BOY OF THE /YEAR/: TAKE YA JERSEY SLANDER SOMEWHERE ELSE: HE'S MY WHITE BUOY UVF FOREVA!

...proceeded to Blow On It ;-;, s-so stan wouldn't burn his mouth... ( bc rav always gets too excited and burns his mouth; nooo :c </3 ) and asked him why his phone was blowing up w/ people tagging him in thirst traps of 'That Supa Nerdy Guy From That One Crime Show' and asking him if stan tweeted something about him cooking bc people keep telling him that he's 'Cooked'. SHKDLDHLKS HEEELP.

And....

*rawr xd home mid/hschooled ravenstan vc*

Scene. <3

[narwhalandchill]

also like . huge fan (not) of the way that hsr is having the worst endgame modes of all time . AND. at the same time. genshin Also gets whatever the fuck THIS abyss is like . what the actual fuck.

like u know its fucking bad when i take 1 look at the lineup and unanimously bench international 😭😭 ajax im so sorry but theres a limit to the cringe im willing to commit to enduring for a clear Even when its for u xx. like im sure i couldve figured out A Clear somehow but it wouldve cost my actual sanity wkjjfjkwjkwdkj

(putting the pyro lectors on 12-1-2 2nd wave not final wave feels. Actually SO personal against childe teams wtf. like extending childes melee so he solos their shields without worry for the CD bc its last wave anyway has been THE strat since those fuckers fucking released as enemies and now its like nah fuck you actually. what the hell hoyo)

(give him the narwhalpilled final form op alt already hoyo i WILL c6r5)

anyway. ended up going for the. easiest way out possible and i am Completely shameless on that one.

did aggravate and tazer to safely clean up that demonic 12-1 at first, realized 12-2 is also hell so then i just leave to double up on hyperbloom lmao. o7 truly

except unironically this shit had me crafting and leveling a second fucking prototype amber bc kokomi and neuvi had been sharing my R5 one before 💀💀 bc like. neuvi just wasnt doing enough dmg with that one fontaine event catalyst i usually substitute for either of them and i cant run prayers on him bc he will overcap crit but kokomi Also needed the pamber.... so now she has a 80/80 r2 one.

also i had ZERO patience for DMC energy issues btw thats a 4p deepwood build with SEVENTY crit rate 245% ER and R5 fav (=overkill much) . i love fa🅱️onius . DMC unironically still such a solid unit tho like. had a surprisingly great time using them after the longest time . theres some thinking around positioning ur lotus so it hits multiple waves more efficiently but with that figured out it was p kewl all things considered

ALSO WHAT THE FUCKKKKK i only. NOW. looked at my XQ gears since he was feeling rly Off in terms of ER on 2nd half despite my nahidas R5 fav and i.

I FORGOT I PUT THE LVL 90 ONE ON QIQI FOR THE CLORINDE TEAM 😭😭😭 and bc theyre both R5 its not like. i had any issue proccing the passive so That didnt clue me in to there being A problem. oh my fucking god i made this so much more cringe for myself than it actually wouldve been didnt i..................

[solcarow]

.

[findafight]

Saw an earnest yet completely inaccurate or misinformed take and it's like okay fine fine just ignore that even tho they're out to lunch on what happened in that scene no need to comment keep it to yourself. Or at least your own post's tags

[orcelito]

Sometimes I REALLY hate this game (aka. Fire emblem in general)

I've been going through all the training battles before I go onto the main thing for chapter 12. For completionism and also bc I fucking Need the training, holy shit

Anyways I got one for the rainy map from chapter 11. Aka where I was running my life. It was awful then, but WAY WAY WAY WORSE now. Bc they skattered my army across the entire map, some of whom are Very squishy, and gave us over twice as many enemies as I had units, almost all flying, and All of them advanced classes

It was a massacre. Unit after unit falling. Me desperately trying to get the survivors across the map so they could help each other survive. Hiding in the woods in hopes of them missing me, bc being out in the open is a death sentence.

One by one, my units fell. My Healers all fell. My Mages all fell. A few lingered through luck alone... but then it was down to 3. From an original 12.

Me, Alcryst, and Louis. I'd been trying to protect Alcryst bc he's my archer and there were SO. SO SO SO many fliers. I never did get him over to me. I sent Louis over to assist me bc my ass kept DYING & that gets a game over lol. So imagine a dragon princess just guzzling potions in the woods as her armor friend throws javelins over her shoulder. I made it work.

Poor fucking Alcryst though. Stuck in the woods alone, having watched the 3 around him all fall, clinging to his mini bow bc he was literally SURROUNDED and couldn't attack anything otherwise. Also guzzling potions. The literal only reason he didn't fucking die was luck alone. Those fucking woods, man. They made all the difference.

Not that it stopped me from dying like 4 times from like 13% chance hits :) I used that time reversal feature more in this battle than I have Ever before in this game.

[davidtennantpussytulpa]

YIPPEEE bakeoff ended just as it should have

[81folklore]

heaven - OP81 - final part

pairings: oscar piastri x private!reader (fc: gracie abrams + pinterest)

summary: on the 2 year anniversary of oscars first win in f1, everyone’s favorite couple has a surprise

type: social media au (smau)

note: well this is it!! the final part to heaven!! this ending has always been the plan and im so pleased i can finally post it, this win has been a longgg time coming and i am super stoked for oscar!!! obviously not the best race (esp for mclaren fans) but we got through it and oscar won!!!! super duper proud of my mclaren boys and i cant wait to see many more 1-2 with them!!

i honestly cant believe this is the last part to this series, this was one of the first fics i ever posted and its crazy how far its come!! to this day i get notifs that people have found the first part to this series and it blows my mind how big this has gotten. i know ive been inactive for a long time but i hope by finally finishing this fic i will find love for creating fics again!!!! love u all🩵

heaven masterlist masterlist

set 2026

youruser

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and 11,629 others

two years ago my best friend asked me to marry him, i said yes immediately. how could i say no to spending the rest of my life with someone i love so deeply?

today marks 6 months of him being my husband and i feel so incredibly blessed to be able to call him that, to be able to say that someone i love, loves me back just as much

but today is also the anniversary of my boys first win, which seems crazy now that he has many more under his belt but its true, its been two years since that crazy day in hungary and one that changed us forever

i have grown so much in the time we have been together and im so pleased i was able to do it with you, osc. i love you forever and always!

tagged oscarpiastri

view comments

oscarpiastri my favorite forever🤍

oscarpiastri marrying you was the best decision i have ever made

youruser my boy🌟🌟

comments on this post have been limited

oscarpiastri

liked by youruser, logansargeant and 1,382,003 others

i cant believe i get to call this gorgeous girl my wife, and i’ll be able to do so for the rest of our lives

you had never shone as brightly as on our wedding day, however youve continued to shine ever so bright since and i hope it never goes away, seeing you happy and content makes me feel like the luckiest man alive

thank you for saying yes all those years ago and thank you for trusting me with your heart, ill love you forever and always

your osc x

view comments

youruser i love you so much osc

youruser you mean the world to me

landonorris congrats mate x

logansargeant i miss you guys :(

youruser we miss you too logie!!! we’ll be home soon and we will take you to dinner!!

logansargeant oscarpiastri promise?

oscarpiastri we promise

georgerussell63 happy for you both!

frederikvestiofficial come back soon i think logans withering away

oscarpiastri he’ll be fine for a few more days🙄

logansargeant nu huh!! i cant last much longer☹️

user66 oh my god she looks gorgeous 🥹🥹

oscarpiastri she is

user72 YOUR OSC😭😭😭😭

user6 im never getting over them☹️

user91 THEYRE MARRIED☹️☹️😭😭

user10 remember when yn said they werent getting married yet because they still had so much growing to do,, look at them now☹️

user47 i feel like everyones being too calm, WE DIDNT EVEN KNOW THEY WERE ENGAGED?!?!!?!

user64 LIKE WHY ARE WE NOT MORE SHOCKED

user22 bcs they are written in the stars and we all knew this was going to happen!!! liked by youruser

user30 yn with all the little babes oh i cant do this🥹🥹 liked by oscarpiastri

oscarpiastri

liked by youruser, lewishamilton and 1,392,027 others

17.01.2026

view comments

lewishamilton so happy for you mate, it was a gorgeous ceremony💜

logansargeant my favorite people in the whole world

oscarpiastri we love you

logansargeant 🥹🥹 (i love you guys too)

youruser my boy forever and ever and ever

oscarpiastri 🤍🤍

landonorris you guysss😕😕

youruser love you lan!!!!

youruser

liked by oscarpiastri, yourmum 11,483 others

a story told in many parts💐

comments on this post have been limited

pinned youruser to osc, my best friend, my love, my husband i will love you until the end of time. i will hold your hand through everything and more, until death do us part x

youruser added to their story

story song added heaven by niall horan text reads: my 🏠

seen by oscarpiastri, landonorris and 12,472 others

replies

user72 OH MY FUCKING GODDDDD

user19 I CANNOT DEAL WITH YOU TWO 😔😔😔😔

user63 ur literally perfect for eachother wtfwtfwtf

user90 I FEEL SICK THIS IS SO CUTE

user6 oscar is so sweet🥹🥹

youruser the sweetest!!!!

[nyctarian]

people who are mad the best of seven is gonna """take opportunities from other trios teams""" are funny bc you try and figure out what trio they think """should""" be getting that attention and its like, they hate the dark order hate the best friends dont know that andrade is suspended and already forgot he and rush turned on dragon lee and will bitch if rush teams with butcher and blade and would also bitch about rush and the lucha bros doing mask spots as if thats tonys booking and not something those men frequently do outside of aew hate ospreay style wrestling and dont care that ue isnt an aew team and are doing stuff in the company they actually work for hate trustbusters hate the embassy are sick of bcc+dont care that mox is on vacation and bryan is involved in another story dont care that HoB is being built for a huge return didnt care about the actual match top flight and ar fox had against dt were mad when they thought elite were gonna win and only pretended to care that dt's reign would be treated as illegitimate when nothing will give their reign more importance or legitimacy than the best of 7. just admit that no matter how that match and subsequent booking of dt v elite went you were gonna find a way to complain (bc the issue isnt a team that didnt lose their title getting a rematch but the mere fact that the elite returning in such a huge and celebrated way meant they werent evil the way you wanted them to be) and get over it lol.

[flopdriversenthusiast]

how likely i think the drivers would be to whore it out on the podium based largely on vibes and minimal knowledge. also organized within their tiers

explanations under cut extra empty category because i thought it was funny

dr: drinks from his fucking shoe i mean. if he won another race i think he would let someone pour champagne down him sebastian vettel style from that one wdc picture

cl: we couldve been a proper country again at the monaco gp this year but nooooo. he has it in him i know he does. cmon charles. please.

aa: i dunno i just think hes got that dog in him.

fa: hes done it before and he'll do it again. only that far down in the tier bc hes older but he also did post that thirsttrap yesterday so hes not in the second tier with lewis

cs: same as charles. i know you have it in you. please. we could be a proper country

lh: hes done it before but he needs the right person on the podium with him OR needs to win his like 8th wdc or smthn. hes got too much of a reputation to go slutting it around every other podium now

gr: HE COULD DO IT. I KNOW HE COULD. i know your reputation is cringefail radios and t-poses and crashing when carlos wins for some reason but i think he'd do it. someone has to initiate though

pg: hes got that slut energy someone just needs to push it out of him. and he also needs to get a podium again.

lsargeant: he just needs the chance to drink champagne somewhere other than his richboy yacht. your sad doomed by the narrative aura does not deter me i KNOW the slut is in you

op: listen. i know what you're thinking. i have no explanation.

nh: breaking his no podium streak would make him start acting up i know he can do it this man has no shame ive seen his old interviews

lstroll: idk vibes

eo: i dunno he also has like no shame but in the cringe way but not in the george way. hes strange to me.

vb: only this far down because he does his shenanigans for the giggles if someone initiated i think he could

sp: the catholic guilt man. he could!!!!!!! stop flopping checo and you could bring (yourself) this country back to its former glory please!!!!!!!!

mv: the catholic guilt man pt 2. he would though. if he got over it i know he would.

yt: wow all the rb drivers. he doesnt give as much slut energy tbh but i think he would!! he just needs to get over it first

zg: EYEEEEEEEE KNOW YOU HAVE THAT DOG IN YOU. just get on the podium and like get over the fact that all of china will be watching u slut it out and like he'd do it. i swear he would. if he managed to convince his parents not to disown him.

km: i dunno not the right vibes

ln: i dunno pt 2 i didnt really know where to put these two they werent like against it enough to be in the last tier but not slutty enough for the catholic guilt one

[vintagetvstars]

Terry Jones Vs. Alan Alda

Propaganda

Terry Jones - (Monty Python's Flying Circus, Do Not Adjust Your Set) - I wish I could tell you all in a few sentences just how handsome, funny, intelligent, kind and soft-spoken Terry Jones was. How passionate he was about the things he loved, lacing his interests (like e.g. history) throughout all the projects he was working on. How he was supposedly always laughing and giggling when writing and reading out sketches. How he admired the art of silent movies/Buster Keaton and was obsessed with writing poems as a child. How he was described as a wonderful friend and a little as if he carried his own world around with him. But there is simply too much to tell and I adore him too much to pick the best facts, so this will have to do

Alan Alda - (M*A*S*H) - He is both the saddest wettest little meow meow and your kindly grandfather and your favourite eccentric uncle (mom's side). Somehow it works. Passionate Democrat, feminist, great writer, he and his books are hilarious. Did a cartwheel when he won an Emmy! How he met his wife is the best meet cute of the last two centuries, and they've now been married over 60 years!!!

Master Poll List | How to submit propaganda | What is vintage? (FAQ)

Additional propaganda below the cut

Alan Alda:

he’s just so good in MASH

he put so much bisexuality into hawkeye i think it fundamentally changed me when i was little and watching mash for the first time. anyway do we all know the story about how he met his wife when they were at a party together and they were the only two people eating the cake that fell on the floor and he fell in love with her over her laugh. i just think hes neat :) i love when theres a strange looking man. also feel it necessary to say that the guy that wrote the book mash was based on wrote himself as hawkeye and HATED alda's hawkeye bc he displayed his morals too much (alda had it in his contract for the show that every episode had to have an operating room scene bc otherwise you arent backdropping the fact that war is Not fun. actually. he almost didnt take the role bc he thought a war comedy would make too much light of the horrors)

please please please use this picture of him, he's so hot in it

His comedic delivery in MASH...

The story of how he met his wife is charming and sweet, and they've now been married 65 years

Just look at him. He's the most beautiful man I've ever seen but also he's completely average. He's got a weak jawlines and a round face and these big soft eyes and he's just so beautiful. He's capable of playing a silly charismatic sitcom protagonist in one scene, and a jaded army surgeon haunted by the deaths he's witnessed in the next. He's so hot that my dad once told me he decided to apply to medical school because of how much he was attracted to Hawkeye Pierce. That's literally how I learned that my father was bisexual.

He's also just a really great dude? He's been outspoken about his political beliefs for a long time, and has always been strongly and vocally anti-war, pro-feminist, and pro lgbt. He served a tour in the Korean war, and his experiences there informed his performance in the show. He (and honestly the entire cast, but especially him) really just soared above and beyond the standard for comedies of the day.

He's so funny and his eyes are pretty

He loves and is a champion of science (Source).

[w0rmm1lk]

Hiiii

Can I request a Bakugo (Cuz let’s be honest, he is FINE AS HELL) x gn! Reader who’s very socially awkward?

Like, if anyone they don’t know tries to talk to them they’ll just be like🧍‍♂️and give them that classic awkward smile

yes!!!! i relate to this reader sm and also I 100% agree bakugo is so fucking fine like??????? he's a fucking 2d character from a style where theporportions arent even based on humans, he has unmanaged anger issues and will fucking explode and not in the joking sense and yet????/ like whoever made hi design TEL ME YOUR WAYS. he's so fucking pretty. but also as much as I love him jeanist did him so fucking dirty with that hair. jeanist looked at *THAT* and really said "I can fix him"??? bitch don't fucking fix him I like the explosive pomeranian bitch. but like that one scene when he was making fun of todoroki during the provisional license extras classes like bro I was watching with my siblings and had to aggressively hold back a fucking screach noise. AND I STILL DO WHENEVER I WACTH IT. he's a fucking anime character who is so damn unhealthy but if you cant tell by the length of this, I fucking love him.

reader: GN

characters: bakugo katsuki

summary: reader is a very much not people person so how the fuck are they dating bakuhoe out of all bitches

warnings: swearing if you couldnt tell. anxiety, mentions of anxiety attacks. bakugo being a bitch.

💥- okay honestly, first day? didnt even know you were in the class.

💥- this mf too focused on beating everyone up to notice you.

💥- was forced to acknowledge you when you kiri and bakuhoe were in the same area during the usj attack.

💥- after yall beat the shit out of some ppl you were sweating a ton but not bc you just fought some bitches.

💥- your ass was panicked af, not only are you shoved in a small space with two extroverts, you're also being exxesivley complimented by Kirishima bc you punched someone and along with that the fucking usj is under attack.

💥- it was very obvious you were panicking tbh.

💥- like bakuhoe at this point doesnt give a shit about other peoples feelings at this point but even he could tell.

💥- you were just standing there with you r arms pinned to your sides staring into the distance as Kirishima was obsessing oever how you beat someone up.

💥- after the usj he started to notive you more often.

💥- he noticed hpw evenn when the whole class was close with each other, you were still extremely quiet.

💥- he noticed how awkward you were even when talking to your friends.

💥- he noticed how youd speak up if your friends were being rude to you but the moment someone like monoma said something you just shut down.

💥- he even noticed how panicked you were when you learned about the internships.

💥- during the sports festival you both fought one on one, that's when he truly noticed how awkward you were.

💥- like bro was beating the shit out of you while yelling shit like "say something damnit!"

💥- honestly even though he wouldve won anyways, the round ended faster due to your panic with him yelling n shit.

💥- bro was thinking about it more and was like "damn. but like why were they kinda cute."

💥- first thoughts?

💥- immediete denial.'

💥- bakugo thought his time would be something like loud and outgoging, someone whos super confident.

💥- then saw you who was about to have a fuckinh panic attack and was like:

💥- i want that one.

💥- honestly ur crush on him was not obvious at all, you were just your normal panicky self but this time with slightly more blush.

💥- honestly you guys didnt get together until someone had to word it to make it seem like they were challenging bakugo to confess.

💥- will fight someone for you.

💥- monoma insulted you? 3 days of house arrest for bakuhoe.

💥- someone judged you? explosions.

💥- cashier looked at you wrong? banned from the convenience store for the next 6 months.

💥- congrats on your new scary dog privledges.

💥- mf so fucking protective tbh

💥- its not that he doesnt think you cant fight for yourself, he knows you can beat anyone to a pulp. i mean like- you're in the hero course for gods sake man.

💥- more in the sense of, distant jealousy. you wont know he's jealous, but whoever is talking to you thats making him jealous will know.

not my best work but i wanted to type something lol.

[rb19]

as the norstappen url holder TO ME current norstappen dynamics is SYMPATHY IS A KNIFE by charli

we know lando cares very deeply about how fans/media view their friendship. he felt he had to clear up he didn't race max hard in 2023 bc there's no point duh max was in rocketship, he could not compete, didnt make sense for his own result to put up a fight, it's not bc he is max's mate!!!! stop saying that PLEASEEE!!!!! went far to say that "we're not best friends." and i get that. just bc max doesn't let fans/media opinion get to him, it doesn't mean it's easy for lando to do the same.

max considers lando his best friend from the grid bc lando was the first driver who had the same interests as him back in 2019. finally someone from the grid understood max's sim racing obsession. lando didn't make fun of max's love for video games bc he also loved to play them. their iracing/COD streams back in 2019/2020 were fun and the reason they got close. as lando moved to monaco they started hanging out together, max loves a good party and so does lando now so to sass cafe we go. lando couldn't get max into golf god bless but they love to play padel. etc.

lando was very much a fan of max when he first got into f1. once i was stalking this inactive max fan page on instagram and noticed lando liked a bunch of posts back in 2018 😭 he saw max winning the big titles in karting. i think a few max fans are annoyed by some of lando's actions/interviews right now but they forget how he was/is always very complimentary of max as a driver/person in interviews. how he asked in the 2020 70th anniversary gp who won the race and his reaction to race engineer saying max was "legend." how he was team max throughout the whole 2021 season. how even last year he asked british fans to not boo max in silverstone. etc. and max was always there backing up lando too. stating he believes lando has what it takes to be a world champion in the future, that he made the right choice by staying in mclaren and having faith in the project.

IN 2024 they both have a fast car and they can compete against each other. max is a three time world champion, he aint got nothing else to prove. he has beaten lewis fucking hamilton. lando is the one who has everything to prove. he has to prove he can fight max hard now and back up his words. the pressure is all on lando. so how lando talks about max in race weekends, how he reacts to max's performances on track is going to change naturally. those max fans have to accept that. but things won't change for max, because max has been winning for so long now. max knows how to take losses. how to quickly recover from mistakes.

and ofc max being happy for lando in miami was ok, it was first win, everyone was happy for him. but lando doesn't want to see max happy anymore. i just beat you to pole and you come up to me to gossip about leclerc's lack of penalty??? who the fuck cares, can't you be at least a bit mad? lando will sulk after a race he feels he should've won, while max will quickly get over a p2 in miami even if he got fucked over by a SC. lando will entertain hypotheticals bc it helps knowing he was close to a win again, while max dgaf he could've won miami, he's all praises for lando.

lando does not have the self confidence max has. lando will question himself. it's normal. lando will feel conflicted. he doesn't want max to play nice with him, he doesn't want max's sympathy after he just lost a race. sympathy is just a knife. he knows it's sincere coming from max, and especially bc it's sincere he feels belittled by it. it's silly and he doesn't even want to feel that way. is he not worthy of being max's RIVAL? he doesn't want max to explain to him after the race how his aggressive move opened up the door to george overtake them both. he doesn't want max to be laughing at him in the press con. can max take me seriously for a sec?

next chapter: austria.

[thepepsislvt]

What if we had another Barto fic because were so starved for his content esp in writing if the reader was like a strawhat that luffy picked up in like skypiea maybe..like a shandorian with the little wings 👀.. just a thought..

I WIN yes i will write more of Barto bc i love him and im glad so many other people love him too!

this one seemed rushed and i apologize i wrote this before my second shift of work :(

Bartolomeo x Winged! Gn Reader

warnings: all fluff, some cursing, mention of doflamingo

you were born on Skypiea and thats all you’ve known

you were always so curious as a child but nobody would tell you what the rest of the world was like

So when you hit your teenage years you decide that one day you're going to leave the floating island

You had wings so you could easily fly away but you couldn't navigate the ocean by yourself

Most nights you would hope and pray that someday, someone would save you.

That's when a certain pirate with a straw hat came and fucked shit up on your island

At the age of 19, you knew this was your getaway, a savior you had spent all of these years praying for

After he won the battle he was fighting you came up to him and his crew as they were about to depart

“Strawhat! You must take me with you! I will prove myself worthy to join your crew-”

“Ok”

“-and I won't take no for an answer! Wait did you say okay? That fast?” you looked at the pirate captain with confusion and shock

All he did was smile and nod

So it was easier than you thought

It didn't take very long to get along with the rest of the crew members

You would give Usopp, Chopper, and Luffy rides through the air

Zoro taught you how to use a sword

Naomi taught you to pickpockets even though you probably won't use that skill

The Entire crew loved you

When Frankly and Brook joined the Straw hats you easily got along with them as well

When you got separated for two years on Sabaody you couldn't have been happier to see them

Your wings had fully grown and you could now use them to their full potential

You guys may have changed a lot physically over the past two years but nothing has changed between your friendship

During the events of Dressrosa, you decided to follow Luffy to the Colosseum to make sure he doesnt give away his identity and draw unwanted attention towards him

While you and Luffy were watching the fight, a certain green haired rooster head had caught your eye

he was hated by the crowd for being vulgar but thats what you liked about him

after his victory in Block B you knew you had to go and greet him

what you were not expecting was him to start crying and saying how much he wasn’t good enough to be in your presence

how can such a scary looking man with the title “Cannibal” fall to his knees over someone like you?

you were flattered by his kind (?) response and had to console him

he asked you to sign your wanted poster he kept

after the defeat of Doflamingo, you hung around Bartolomeo more, falling more and more for him and his wild personality

he had finally accepted that you were actually his friend and took his fanboying down a notch (he still has his moments though)

you had asked him out since you know damn well he wouldnt have the balls to ask you

when you did he just about died on the spot

but y’all had the best time on your date

Sanji and Nami had helped you dress nicely for the event

at the end of the night Barto and you were just star gazing as you told him all about each constellation

Barto knew he had to something he just didnt know how

“you see those six stars up there forming a ‘W’? they call that one the King of Pirates in honor of Gol Roger himself! isnt that cool?” you had explained while pointing to the sky

after you didnt get a response from him you looked over to see if he was alright only to be met with his face close to yours

“Barto? are you alright?” you whispered to him

He just stared into your eyes before kissing your cheek, leaving you flustered and your wings spread out in suprise

“was that okay? should i not have done it?” Bartolomeo started to panic and think of every possible negative outcome before you kissed his lips gently

“more than alright”

he Smiled and started giggling all giddy

“I GOT KISSED BY MY FAVORITE STRAWHAT!!” he yelled out into the sky

you only laughed and kissed him again

[woobble42069]

HEARING TUBBO ASKING FOR PERFERANTAL VOTING AND DESCRIPTIONS IS MAKING ME CRY. THIS IS WHAT BAD WANTED , THIS IS WHAT I WANT. DONT MAKE THE MISTAKES AMERICA MAKES PLEASE o(-(

I GET IT PEOPLE DIDNT LIKE THE ELECTION ARC! QBBH WAS A ANNOYING ABOUT HIS SYSTEM! BUT HE WAS ANNOYING FOR GOOD REASON!! WE LIVE IN THE GOOD OL USA WE KNOW THE SYSTEM IS SHIT PLEASE!

i know people said it wasn't good for lore and that this system would cause more conflict but think of all the cool features that could be added to the qsmp that could /lead/ to cool lore! botaina has a whole new dimension! vinery could play in to dapper and aypierre lore! we could have the industrial age in the qsmp! with ranked choice voting the max amount of people will be happy and we can see creators use these mobs bc they wanted them!! and they'll have know what they were voting for with descriptions instead of just siding with whoever is the loudest!! obviously that will still happen a bit but less votes will be cast that way!

and i know it's not that deep and ultimately it's a fictional story and the plot will keep plotting regardless but hearing someone else wanting the same thing just makes me think of what we could have

anyways qtubbo is so based. i loved him from the jump but if he didn't win me over in purgatory he has won me over now.

[bonnibuckets]

— party boyfriend | leon kennedy

700 follower special!!

pairing: bbf leon x afab reader

warnings: smut! brother best friend leon, a little ooc leon, party setting, mentions of SA!, mention of alcohol!, pet names, degradation, praise, oral (m receiving), size kink, rough, almost getting caught, unprotected sex :0, creampie, public sex, leon saying no and stop a few times

synopsis: you get grabbed on at a party and leon is there to comfort you

wc: 2.9k+

note: this poll won so y’all get smut but for the ppl who wanted fluff I PROMISE NEXT FIC WILL BE!! this is also based on this audio, so credit to them for this🙏 (i didnt follow it down exactly to a t but it comes close) also now finishing this i feel guilty posting this bc it’s not 100% original but i hope y’all like it nonetheless

── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──

You heard the music blaring in the house and your head was slightly dizzy. You walked through the hallway and felt someone’s hand grab your ass. You immediately turned and slapped the hand away— some random creep “Got a fat ass” he smirked, and you felt sick to your stomach “fuck off” you huffed.

You wanted to punch him in the face, but you opted to just walk out of the house to get some fresh air to escape. You heard the creeps' insults as you walked away, but you ignored them. You opened the door and walked down the steps, you didn’t know what to do so you called your brother's best friend— Leon who is also at this stupid party.

“Hey?” you heard the ambiance of the party and could barely hear Leon, “Can you meet me outside please?” “What? Okay yeah, I’ll be there” He gruffed before hanging up. It took a few minutes before you heard the door open and close “What, what’s up?” Leon said a little annoyed— probably because you ruined his fun but you didn’t care right now.

“I need to talk to you,” you said and Leon rolled his eyes “I’m pretty sure I can guess what this is about, last time we came to one of these we kissed” You shook your head trying to explain but Leon cut you off “sure it happened I was drunk you were drunk, shouldn’t have been but we kissed” you felt a little angry at the fact he wouldn’t let you speak but you sighed and continued to listen.

“It happened, I get it okay you know, but I’m friends with your brother I’m not doing that again” you groan “No, it’s not about that! Some guy fucking grabbed on me,” you said frustrated. “Oh…gross, who was he?” “I don't know some fucking creep,” you said looking down.

“Well I'm sorry, just don't tell your brother, though he’ll never let you come to another one of these again” he chuckles and you raise an eyebrow at that, why would he care? “Why not?” you joked “Because you’re cool to hang out with I guess,” Leon said a little awkwardly, “So why did you drag me out here?” he questioned and you felt your cheeks burn.

“I don't know I was thinking maybe if the guy saw you with me he’d leave me alone” You shrugged now feeling a little stupid admitting your plan out loud. “Oh, so now if he gets hella trashed he’ll come to beat me up?” he laughed, “No!” you said panicking a little as Leon shook his head “Nah just saying you know telling you how it feels” you groan and roll your eyes.

“I’m just messing, it’s cool we can stay out here for a little while until you want to go back inside and drink or dance,” he said sitting on the steps and you followed. “Can we drink together?” you asked smiling, “No absolutely not, we cannot drink and dance together” he argued and you felt a little hurt but you scooted closer, “What are you doing?” he said a little shocked you ignored him and leaned your head on his shoulder.

He groaned “Fine. You can lean on me to “sell” the image I guess” You smirked and felt his warmth “Put your arm around me, it’ll sell it more” you teased wanting more. Leon cocked an eyebrow “No, I am not doing that” You frowned and begged “Pleaseeee?” he rolled his eyes. “Don’t frown at me from down there” he laughed.

You gasped “Down there?!” I’m not that fucking short asshole. “Yes down there” he laughed “You have to look up at me when talking, when we kissed I had to lay on the floor-“ you cut him off and punched his arm. “Ouch- okay okay” he laughed before wrapping an arm around you, “just 1 arm okay, I gotta look cool” he smiled.

“What if I want to get laid tonight, you’d ruin the chance” you laughed, he couldn’t be serious “Like someone would want to” he looked a little offended “Um yeah some girl totally would” he rolled his eyes.

You always had a little crush on Leon but you never acted on those feelings fully, the only time you did was once when drunk and Leon doesn’t count it. This time was different. You both were sober and you felt a little confident, you wanted him so you teased him.

“Why don’t we?” He looked at you like you were crazy. “Um, because I’ve known your brother for my whole life, and I'd rather him not catch us,” he said shaking his head and looking off into the street and you laughed, catching us kissing?” you smiled.

“No im not worried about kissing,” he said turning to look at you before leaning into your ear and whispering “im worried about him catching me fucking rearranging you” You immediately felt your breath hitch and your whole body heat up at his words as he pulled away and watched you get all flustered. Your heart filled with hope— maybe he felt the same about you, just maybe.

“And besides he’s inside right now,” Leon said pointing to the door, you both looked back “I don't think he can see outside the glass though, wait,” he said getting up and you followed “I don't think anyone can see for that matter,” he said looking inside.

He turned back and it looked like he had a revelation, “you, you just used this to get me close to you huh?” he said towering over you, you smirked— maybe a little but it wasn’t entirely your plan but you decided to bite the bullet and palm him through his jeans. You knew it would change the subject but also to let him know you wanted him, not like that bullshit drunk kiss.

He immediately reacted and looked down at you, “You cannot do that.” Leon let out a shaky breath, he looked at the door and furrowed his brows looking back at you “I think he’s coming you have to stop it” he said grabbing your wrist and pushing you into the door. Your breath hitched and you felt your heart beating out of your chest as you swallowed your spit dryly.

He pulled it away and looked at you sternly “You cannot be doing that understand? You’re being fucking bad” he said sucking his teeth, you felt yourself getting slick and you smiled looking up at him trying to make him break. “Fine” You smiled and turned around to look inside— pressing your ass against him. You chuckled and got onto your tiptoes and peered inside, “Oh yea? Gotta look inside, and rub that little ass on me huh?” he said, sucking in a breath.

“Gotta get on your tiptoes for that princess?” he teased and you felt your cheeks burn and you immediately turned around setting your feet flat, you looked down and saw his bulge. You smiled feeling beyond confident and he looked down to see what you were looking at and he practically read your mind, “Yes yes I’m hard” he tried to brush it off as if it was nothing, but you wouldn’t let him get away that easily.

“Why?” you smiled, of course, you knew why but teasing Leon was too much fun. “because you’re fucking gorgeous— Jesus okay, but no we cannot I’ve known your brother way longer and our friendship will last longer than any orgasm,” he said shaking his head trying to reason with you.

“Your dick says otherwise” you smirk, “yes okay but that’s not a valid point,” he said looking around to see if anyone was noticing but it was pitch black. “But I need you Leon,” you say squeezing your thighs to try and get any friction. His face immediately changed and you could tell you were breaking him, “huh, really now..how much?” he asked cautiously.

“So fucking bad, I’m dripping,” you said trying to press your body against him, he gently pushed you away “Okay okay— sorry but we cannot be doing this, absolutely not your brother is inside that house, so no” you felt frustrated and this was going nowhere so you decided to spice it up “fine, I’ll just go back inside,” you said turning around but Leon grabbed you “no don't just go back inside the creep is probably looking for you,” he said pulling you back.

“Then what do you want me to do?” you said turning back around, you knew if you put enough pressure on Leon he’d crack “Look- fuck I don’t know okay,” he said before you both heard footsteps and the door handle jiggled. Your heart dropped and you both panicked and immediately ran to the side of the house, Leon grabbed you and pulled you as fast as he could and covered your mouth with his hand “Shutupshutp just shut the fuck up” he whispered yelled.

“Sis? Are you out here?” you both heard and froze, you smirked— the perfect opportunity to test him, you immediately rubbed him through his pants. “Fuck no don't please come on” he whispered, the door closed and Leon let out a breath and you took that moment to get on your knees and unzip his pants. “Oh! my god” he said panicking as you pulled his cock out and looked up at him.

“Stop. Stop it” he said trying to get you off but you smiled and pumped him with your hands before kissing the tip. “Oh, my god, that’s not fucking fair” he moaned, and you smiled. You had broken through, “it’s so big” you teased and kissed the side, “of course you think it is it’s half your god damn size— god stop. stop it,” he said running his fingers through his hair.

“Oh my god, you have to stop” he moaned and shook his head “We can’t no stop,” he said but made absolutely no effort to pull you off. “You won okay, fuck” he said as you pushed up his shirt to see his trail and swirled your tongue at the tip making his knees buckle slightly.

You saw Leon give in to you and you never felt more proud, you popped off and smiled up at him. “Jesus okay fine, we’ll do it okay just— just this once,” he said pushing your hair out of the way “So fucking gorgeous with my cock in your hand princess” he smiled softly.

“Just suck my cock” he said panting and you immediately dove in, “oh shit yea just like that, make it sloppy,” he said closing one eye. You smiled and took him as far as was comfortable and sucked while pumping the rest. You popped off and spat on it before swirling your hand up and down it before paying attention to the tip, he moaned and entangled his fingers in your hair. Your heart was beating so fast, you’d been dreaming about this moment for years ever since you graduated from high school at 18 and left for college.

“Oh fuck, yea just like that— so fuckin’ dirty” he smiled and his core was tightening. You took him deep into your mouth and used your other hand to touch his balls and he immediately sucked in a breath and smiled, “Yeah keep going— come on baby” he moaned watching you devour him. “Ohh…oh yeah” he chuckled as his dick twitched in your mouth, “fucking drool all over it, be a good fucking girl f’me”

You were a mess down there, dripping out your panties, but you weren’t complaining at all. Watching Leon enjoy your mouth gave you validation like no other, you wanted more— no needed more. “Yeah so cute, you feel all that in your mouth?” he asked and you hummed and he winced feeling it, and chuckled. “Yeah well I’m gonna fucking use this cock on you like your a fleshlight— like a toy made just for me” he smiled.

You immediately moaned against him as you felt a jolt of pleasure send straight to your cunt. “Play with yourself” he moaned trying not to get too excited, “come on, rub that clit” he said desperately as you gagged on him. You reached down with one hand and dove into your panties, immediately moaning against him as your fingers met your clit.

You rubbed circles and slapped it gently before plunging 2 fingers in, “atta girl, such a good slut for me” he said as his breath was hitching slightly. “Yea drip all over the grass” he moaned and you kept fucking yourself with your fingers. He groaned and pulled you off abruptly and picked you up to stand on your feet, “turn— turn around fucking bend over” he said kissing your lips.

You immediately did hands pressing against the cold house, “good girl” he smiled and pulled down your panties to your thighs. He aligned his cock with your pussy and slowly went in, you both moaned as he went deeper, “oh my god” you said looking back. “So fucking good, hugging me so good” he smiled a toothy grin.

He shook his head and came back to reality “You’re okay?” he asked a little concerned and your heart swelled at the thought of him caring about you even in a moment like this, “good, so good” you huffed and pushed your hips back into his trying to get more. “Oh god,” he moaned as his hips met yours before pulling back and thrusting again. Your voice hitched and you tried to fuck yourself against him as well, “yea that’s right fuck” he chuckled and slapped your ass.

You went forward a little and gasped as he gripped the red mark before slapping it again, grabbing the fat of your ass roughly. He groaned and struggled to bend down to meet your ass, “fuck, it's hard bending down” he said breathlessly “Do— do you trust me?” he asked and you nodded.

“Good, I’m gonna pick you up and fuck myself into you how does that sound? Yeah, you won’t have to think about anything else but this dick okay?” He asked and you moaned and he pulled your panties to your ankles and spun you around and picked you up holding you tightly. “It's okay I won't drop you” he smiled and kissed your lips quickly, before pushing his dick back into you thrusting up and pulling you down slightly.

You both moaned at the new angle as he hit even deeper inside you, you felt so tiny in his arms but in a good way. It was turning you on so much as he buried his face into your neck, he moaned and pushed your back against the house and you wrapped your legs around his back as your panties fell to the ground.

He reached down and rubbed your clit as you felt yourself getting worked up, you knew if he kept pounding you so good you’d gush. “Yea, yea, shit, so good, you don't even have to think huh? You can just focus on being a whore for me yea?” he smiled and bit your neck as you moaned, he left sloppy kisses all along your neck.

“God wanna fill you up, but it's such a bad idea” he chuckled, you could feel you were losing it, “on birth control” you huffed out. Leon immediately grinned, “yea? Then I’m gonna stuff you full” he moaned and felt his hand cramping up but he didn’t care because he felt you tightening around him.

You moaned and wrapped your arms around his neck moaning his name as he kept pounding and rubbing you, “Oh god im so close” he moaned. All your senses were overloaded— the cold house on your back, Leo’s cock, his warm body, and the adrenaline from the risk of getting caught only fueled you and you felt your orgasm seconds away as he thrusts into you so hard and at the right angle.

Your eyes rolled back as you clawed at his back and squeezed around him gushing, he immediately stopped rubbing your clit and grabbed you by your thighs before ramming into you at an ungodly speed. “Oh fuck.. oh god yesses” you both moaned like a mantra before he sunk his teeth into your shoulder and came deep inside you.

You moaned in pain as you were panting and he groaned before slowly pulling out and setting you down. You smiled and huffed “So fucking good” you teased and he smiled “Yeah”. “Get your panties before anyone sees,” he says, tucking himself back in and zipping his zipper.

You did and looked up at him, he placed his hand on your shoulders and tried to fix your hair, “god everyone's gonna know what happened if you go back inside now” he chuckled “I don't care” You smiled and wrapped your arms around his neck as you stood on your tiptoes.

He chuckled and grabbed your waist, “yea?” he smiled before looking away and looking back at you “I know I only said once but um, maybe… if another boy tries something like that you know, maybe we can do…this again? Only at parties though— I can be…your little party boyfriend and protect you, sound good?” he smiled and you nodded, “yea I’d love that”

taglist 🏷️: @ghostkennedy @adaelines @konigbabe @rat-typewriter @meowsiee @dilucstruelover @antidesire @d34ng3l @alewesker