#me: yeah i'll do this fun ask thing!
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some low effort emmet and elesa while i wait for my coffee to kick in
[reference for 2nd pic]
#submas#subway boss emmet#gym leader elesa#nimbasa trio#or like. 2/3rds of them#autumn.fandom#autumn.art#pokemon#pokemon bw#pokemon bw2#god my brain is melted rn and all i can do is meme redraws#TRYING to work on real art and i'm just dissatisfied with everything#whatever. you know. this kinda thing is fun and relaxing so like.#yeah.#uhh send me asks i guess. or. maybe i'll open up sketch requests at some point.#that could be fun
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can't wait til I start this stupid job so I won't have to be doing commissions all the fucking time to buy groceries, this shut sucks the joy out of art so much. I wanna be drawing ultrakill stuff & personal art & doing crafts & reading books but every time I sit down to do something for me I'm thinking about the fact that I should be doing commissions. I'm so glad I didn't go into art as an actual career, I would hate myself so much forever
#i just want art to be able to be a hobby again aaaaa#i can talk about it here bc nobody who's commissioning me knows this is my blog. ive gotten like 2 commissions off tumblr ever lmfao#and tbh i am tired of pretending to be enthusiastic about drawing other peoples ocs. im so tired of customer service voice#im not gonna lie most of the time i do not care about your blorbo. i'm glad you're having fun im happy for u but i just need money#im happy you like my art enough to pay for it but im so TIRED#being self employed sucks like yeah i can choose my own hours but im also always thinking 'i could be working now' and i HATE IT#i don't wanna make it sound like i'm gonna starve or anything I can ask my parents for money if i really need to#im not like in genuine poverty or the biggest victim of capitalism here i just have a family that's deeply unpleasant to interact with#but im starting a half-time job at the university physics department at the end of the month and that'll be enough to cover Being Alive!!!#and will also hopefully be something i am genuinely interested in & enjoy with people who seem relatively cool#(they're gonna let me into the machine shop!! im gonna get to build things!! they were genuinely interested in my robotics experience!!)#so once art stops being the Thing Temporarily Feeding Me i'm hoping i'll be able to draw more fun stuff again. & maybe even enjoy comms#it's somehow easier to be enthusiastic about commissions when i know the money will be going to buy a Cool Sword instead of food
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are you catholic? i wouldn't have said so
anon 😭😭 i'm not trying to make fun of you and i'm taking this as a compliment actually but i don't know how to tell you this... i'm literally italian 😭
but seriously, i've grown up catholic yeah, but i don't believe in god and haven't taken part in anything religious in many years. i would say i'm like culturally catholic tho. and technically still catholic to the eyes of the church bc baptism and all that
#not all italians are catholic obviously so fairs but i'm a white italian there's like a pretty high chance here#this made me laugh at first bc i feel like you can't really go on my blog and not notice i'm italian which kinda means i'm likely catholic#but yeah#actually have a complicated relationship with faith that summing it up here would be hard 😭😭😭#not in a religious trauma way even if i can't say it was a fun experience to grow up trans and gay and hear the shit catholics say about#people like me. and all that#but like i have prayed recently even if i'm not religious. i think if it helps other people who are religious that i pray for or with them#then it's a pleasure to do it. kinda hard to explain but i believe praying helps even if i don't believe in any entity you pray to#like i think it helps me too in a weird way. like it helps me when other people pray for me. i'm glad to know if they do#i guess the thing is that to me religion is community and i believe so much in the importance of community so i will gladly partecipate in#other people's religion to be close to them and to understand them better and also to feel some of what they feel. feel some of their faith#because the truth is that i would love to believe. in any god. or anything spiritual. i wish i had that comfort in my life#but well the reality is that i don't believe and you can't force faith so it is what it is. i tried finding faith before and it didn't work#i said i wouldn't sum it up here then i did sorry 😭😭 there's so much more tho like. for a non religious person i think about religion sm#and i have a great appreciation for it - then we can get into Organised Religion Problems territory and i will have lots to say too#but religion itself is like one of the most beautiful thing humanity has imo#ok i'll shut up#asks#anon
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no promises anymoooooreeeee i'll appear online when i appear online 😭 every time i say "ooh i think life is almost done being overwhelming!" it. becomes even more overwhelming in the dumbest ways. all i can manage rn when i'm not stressing myself into a shut-down state is staring at the wall while listening to youtube essays + mindlessly crocheting.
i might queue up ppls art and fics w/o commentary in the tags... i want other ppl to see what all of my cool friends have made, but i genuinely can't think right now with this monstrous brain fog. i'm really sorry, just. yeah. maybe i'll think of some way to make it up later!!! once the dust has settled!!!! but until then i wuv u and miss u. smiles.
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[venting in tags including familial manipulation and ableism. i. didn't mean to write all of that, thiss was originally going to be a main blog post but. aaaaaAAAAAA!!!!!
also no need for replies or anything, i'd turn them off for just the one post if i could kjsndkn, i just needed to get things out and go eep jsjndsfdn ok bye bye bye bye!!!!]
#goddd my family finds it sooooooo funny that i can't do basic tasks! it's soooo funny that i can't even think of a horror movie to watch#on halloween bc i genuinely can't remember a single one right now. it's soooo funny that i can't take cardboard boxes or#old furniture out of my room without help bc i've physically and mentally and emotionally burnt out for Months.#and me not being able to move shit out after two (2) days makes me a hoarder somehow. and ofc hoarding is a moral failing#and my mom has to give me a stern talking-to about hoarding things... that were. again. in my room for 2 days....#[tbc it isnt a moral failing no matter the reason. life is hard and things happen and it can be hard to get rid of things for Reasons.]#nevermind them making constant snide remarks about me using ugly 'mismatched' desk / storage furniture. bc it was free / cheap? no income??#AND!!!!! i have a couple of new diagnoses. which doesn't change much day to day but it does make my family making fun of me#even more dumbfounding. like. this explains a lot of really scary unexplained symptoms that constantly leave me#housebound for weeks but uhhh haha hehe hoho??? so silly so funny that i'm barely conscious for multiple weeks???#and you can see that i'm getting worse but that makes it funnier??? hmm!!!#also nevermind that i've told them the exact reason why i've been like this (read: them) but that ALSO makes it funnier somehow.#but i also can't say shit bc they're doing something ~nice~ for me (out of convenience + after almost a decade of 'don't get comfortable'#and 'don't decorate this room bc it isn't yours' and 'you need to be ready to move out by x date'#only for the date to arrive and them to pull the 'i never said that. and if i did say it i didn't mean it like that.#and if i did mean it like that i don't anymore.' card. + any big renovations are things they wanted anyway. hmmmm!!#and how i have to do all of the phys labor alone bc if i ask for help i get made fun of!!! and yelled at that i'm doing things Wrong#(hint: i'm following instructions to the letter but. my family knows better than those silly things!! ^^ ))#jfc i sure did rant. uh. yeah. things. are really weird and uncomfy and i feel thankful that i finally can have my own things on display#outside of closets and bins again after a decade?? but i'm also waiting for the other shoe to drop / them to tell me i owe them in#some way??? bc that's how it works. 'i'm doing a nice thing you didn't even ask me for so now you have to do whatever i tell you to.'#meanwhile i can't even maladaptive daydream my way through it bc my brain is soup right now. can't remember basic things abt#my interests bc i've been on negative battery / spoons for a couple of months straight and it's only getting worse.#OKAY TLDR i'm not in a state to do anything until everything irl gets settled. and i'm trying So Hard to get it all over with but there's#only so much i can do in a day before i completely shut down. i didn't even get into the insurance stuff i've been fighting too ughhhh.#so if i show up on here in short spurts -- hi! bye! hi!! i wuv and care u!!! hope youre well mwah mwah!!!!!!! i'll post what i can and then#disappear when i need to recharge. it is what it is. i need to try to sleep now... uh if this post disappears when i wake up.... yeah......#📌 [ my posts. ]#💭 [ my thoughts. ]#vent -
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I don't care that we can't see the results, I'd like to send a care package to the other void. Lanterns to stave off the dark a little, saplings and grass - for wood and eventually starting a wheat farm, some bone meal, tools and books - both already written and blank ones to write/draw in.
It's simple but they deserve the tools to try to make something more comfortable for themselves
****
#asks#trafficblr#traffic series#You are going to give Jimmy a workout#//I can do it//#/can you though?/#//Yeah... I'll give the lamps away while I am searching for Lizzie//#/Fine just hurry up if I know the whispers they'll have a hundred more requests/#//Going!!!//#... ... ...#/what Scar?/#You didn't insult him like you do with me#/and?/#You are not going soft are you?#/That's the most insulting thing you could have said/#/I don't insult people for fun/#That's a lie if I have ever seen one
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wanted to draw a cat. pretty satisfied w how it came out
#wheucto#art#cat#kinda a lot of details but thats okay its just a drawing#ive been drawing cats a lot recently cause i wanna know how to draw them and tried a kinda new method#which did seem to work so i'll keep trying it#anyways someone did ask / think i was a warrior cat fan and. yeah lol#pretty recently though. only started reading the books this year i think#do want to simplify this and make it cartoonier#not a character btw. more like... based on my one fursona i made at some point and donr use#back to wc fan thing. its fun how you can just. tell a persons previous fandoms based on say. how they draw cats or smth#i have watched wc stuff like moonkitti videos before i read the books_ but i dont count that as being a wc fan for me personally#anyways. have this
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Look at you are getting name dropped on Reddit..
i'm like.. I KNOW HER!!!!! ( well, kinda) 😁🥰
You're all very lovely 😭😭 Thank you so much.
(I'm beside myself though @nullington changing your spouse's contact to saucisse allemande, hahahah.)and
#i don't know why but seeing people talking about my fic on reddit is so jarring!#like it's lovely but i guess i just don't really associate it as a fic platform?#wild#and yeah i definitely think louis likes the chase#or mmmm#not even necessarily the chase per se but it's like#i think he likes to feel like he's winning something#i know people disagree with me on this#but i do see louis as both pretty ambitious and mm not status obsessed but invested in his own status#so yeah i try to explore all the different things that means when i'm writing him#because i think it manifests in a lot of different ways#and also it's fun to write haha#fic asks#like a dog-less bone#and hahah i wasn't planning on anymore tokyo flashbacks but you're not the first person to ask so maybe i'll write a little ficlet
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im not ready for work drama all week. again.
#logbook#its just. always something.#winter gives us time to fuck around. and by fuck around i mean everybodys running their mouths instead of legs.#i keep failing the social interaction and conversations this month too which isnt helping.#and a tarot reading said that ppl saw me as stupid and underestimated me and then i had a convo that LITERALLY confirmed that. gos.#god*#at leas ti have lunch made and also uh. clean clothes.#and my new hoodies should arrive tmrw which i can then wear this week.#ummmm what else is good tho OH YES some good stuff has been happening at work.#i just feel out of sorts i guess.#but um. gc has been fun<3 i streamed a gsme today and plan to do so some more this week.#if i can figure out how to stream from steam i'll play other games#umm what else. . slowly making my bookshelves look more at home. keeping my suriving plants alive.#looked at places to rent today EWWWW kill me. but oh well.#did NOT finish my resume but i have this week to work on it. its fine. dont touch me.#i'm determined to be good and chill. and normal. and talk to friends and find good things and. yeah.#maybe this week i'll be brave and ask fav coworker if he wants to do smth sometime soon. .
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Come on, you know you want to, give us the character bingo for Viktor.
don't mind if i doooo
#ask me#okay there's a lot going on here but first things first#viktor has transcended the favorite character tier where I want to protect him or whatever#like yeah he did that shit! I support him but I also don't! the more trouble he gets himself into the happier I'll be!#do you feel me#like one of the things I love most about Viktor is that I feel so much sympathy for the circumstances he's in that are out of his control#but he has so much agency in his own story that everything he's gained and accomplished are because he makes choices#and GETS HIMSELF places#and now the same thing is happening with his BAD choices and I find that just as delightful if not moreso#he is the agent of his own salvation and his own destruction and I will be in the front row seat with popcorn for both or either#so writing him is mostly me studying him under the microscope poking him until he does something untoward it's very fun#I only hesitantly say that Viktor is like me but the Balkan ties and the grumpy-but-kind and obsessive personality#and the strong opinions about a chosen STEM field#are inescapable okay#mommy issues is not circled because I have mommy issues but bc I have convinced myself that Viktor WILL have them#if Nikola Tesla is anything to go by#the jayce-mel-viktor trifecta is ruled by mommy issues and i will stand by that claim#also viktor is more interesting with no therapy - with as little therapy as possible would be my preference#WITH THE EXCEPTION of the lonely genius shit that Singed planted in his head#that is absolutely the lie that Viktor believes that he MUST discard in order to progress as a character and I am excited for it#I genuinely think that Viktor will be happier and more eccentric as [REDACTED] but it won't last#he will hit a VERY LITERAL -if thy right hand offend thee cut it off- situation and then he'll have peace but he won't call it happiness#I can't say that I'd hate anyone who hurt him because that is half of why I'm excited for s2#but I will probably lose it at any scene where he loses to [REDACTED] for rivalry reasons#I genuinely do want to see Mel completely own his ass as [REDACTED] though like can you imagine the banter#and both of them secretly having fun with it
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Tonight, right now, not even ten minutes ago, might have been the closest I got to an outright hatecrime
#morningtalks#Ask to tag#<- I have no clue what I'd have to tag this tbh#But for the story.#Me and my friend (crush) are walking at two am after quite the night. I am fully sober but she's got a few drinks and is just tired now#Like we're walking in silence she's just done type of tired#(part of me worries I was too in love with her tonight but I will do my best to rationalize it as Her Being Tired and not my fault somehow)#But yeah we're walking there and we see/hear a bunch of guys that are clearly not on their first drink#They plan to go to the bar we were so I'm glad we left but they are full on far right singing slogans about getting the leftists out#We cross each other on the street and they immediately begin asking us if we're lefties but then they see my pins#And the fact that we're two girls walking alone and assume we're both lesbians#Ify I obviously am. I have Pins lmao but my crush is not (?)#But yeah I had heard their slogans from afar and had already grabbed my scissors discretely in case something happened#I was genuinely just getting myself ready to fight them all just to leave my friend a chance to run if possible#But I was genuinely scared for her (and also for me but I have a bad habit of prioritizing others' wellbeing and especially here)#So they think we're lesbians and immediately start yelling they don't like lesbians and some other hurtful stuff#But it didn't fully enter my brain. I genuinely don't care#But I was still very afraid they DO something#Luckily they just walked away and we were left in peace but I was genuinely ready to do literally anything to not let my friend get hurt#By these men#I might see her a bit tomorrow. Probably not a lot but we'll see each other#And she doesn't seem to mind too much (she thought we'd see each other next week for class obviously and said “til next week”#(translated quite literally))#I thanked her for the evening still but I genuinely think she just needs to sleep and I don't have to overthink everything that happened#In the end#The first hours of the night were AMAZING though. Genuinely never been closer to her than there I adored every second of it#(and the other people were fun too but. She. Yano)#Anyways I have a thing at 11 I'll go sleep before being fully dead for that thing#But I might genuinely have a delayed reaction on those last events tomorrow#But now I gotta sleep too
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#okay no it's not the darkness getting to me there is a real life thing occupying a lot of my brain space#and idk if there's anything to be gained by speaking it out loud into the void but at the moment it's the only thing i Can do#i don't even have to click the 'post' button if i don't want to#but yeah. yesterday got the news that my mom's husband is dying. had a surprise heart attack and he's not gonna make it#just feels super fucking weird#personally i never really liked him at all so it's not like i myself necessarily have to grieve. never was that close with him#but like. oof this is going to be hard for my mom. and i'm super worried about how she's going to survive#but there's nothing to DO about it really. she wanted to have some space to come to terms with this on her own#and she has a strong support network of friends in her city. while i'm on the other side of the country#and don't even know what i could do to help if i was closer to her. i just. like. what can you even do in a situation like this?#just feels weird to Not do anything when i know how huge of an impact this will make for her entire life#she'll probably have to move to a different place too#and there are people there to help her. people with more life experience. people who probably know more about grief than i do#i just. i have no idea how one handles something like this. except for being there for her when asked#do eldest daughters have some sort of universal responsibilities that i'm just not aware of?#it feels kinda horrible how this is constantly circling back to what can *I* do and what must *I* do. how *I* feel#i'd never ever ever make things this much about me in any other setting than my own tumblr blog. in a tag whisper i'm not sure i'll post#but yeah all of this is eating my brain in a very weird way. an odd sort of limbo where it feels like there should be something here#it'd certainly be easier if i had any sort of relationship with the dead person myself. if i had something to grieve myself#now there's just a feeling that something Should be here to feel. and the knowledge of how hard this must be for my mom#ahhhhh idk none of this makes any sense i'm just speaking in circles and everything feels bad#it's bad and horrible and i don't know how to process any of this and i'm stuck in my brain and can't DO anything#there's nothing i can do to help my mom at this exact moment when she wants to be left alone with her thoughts#and i can't do anything else either because all of this feels like a heavy black cloud fogging up my brain#can't concentrate on anything at all today#not fun. not cool#sussitalk
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ok i've been meaning to send this ask all day but never caught the time. I see so much haikyuu on your blog lately! Tell me more! (funny thing is we are doing a rewatch at home too!) tell me your story and EVERYTHING you want. And also!!!! i can see you shipping hinata and kenma?
OK ok, strap yourself in because I cannot guarantee that this will make any sense. But I’ll do my best.
To be off to a great start, I do not remember how I got into Haikyuu. One day it wasn’t and the next it was. From pictures I have I can say that I was into Haikyuu in my last year of middle school (so 2015-2016). By then I already had mangas but I’m pretty sure I was first attracted to it by the anime so I’d already seen the first season (and maybe the second too) and I had started buying the mangas.
(I shall put a read more here cause this post is LONG, beware!!)
Pictured below is one of my productions during my mandatory stage de troisième. I was in a graphic design agency and I was shy so I’d eat real fast at lunch time and use the rest of the time drawing and my supervisor saw me one day and offered to give me an exercise around it that would make me both enjoy what I was doing and also understand more stuff about graphic design. He was awesome. He really went with all my little cringe interests and encouraged me. The exercise he gave me was to create a cover for Haikyuu. I had a lot of fun with the lettering, understanding the dimensions and everything. He then made me create a brand, understanding why brands are called what they are, making my own logo, and then I worked on one of their (maybe) projects.
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(top is the cover I did, the second one is what I was working on when he gave me the assignment, last on is me being crazy and drawing yaoi in a room full of adults at 14 and them going good job, you wanna keep drawing ?)
Yes I already had a favourite character but it will become more apparent soon. I got really into volleyball because Haikyuu made it look so cool. I was never a sports guy so it was really hard to want to have fun while being so bad with endurance and athleticism. All I had to my name was my flexibility because of dancing for years. Once again I think I was very lucky with the people I met. My PE teacher was really nice and could have just let me skip the class but he didn’t. Wait no, this needs more context. I didn’t have many friends in middle school. I spent the first year with nobody. The second year someone approached me and more or less dragged me in the world of people and friends (once again, I met an amazing person that was just selflessly nice to me). She got me speaking to people and I met my friends through her. My best friend from elementary had abandoned me in a matter of days after we started middle school so I felt very awkward in all situations. Anyway, I had a few people I hung out with but that was about it. I wasn’t exactly the bestest of friends with them but they accepted me even if I was awkward and didn’t talk much. They all knew each other for a while and were much closer (and popular), so when PE would come around I didn’t have anyone to pair up with. SO, my teacher instead of turning a blind eye offered to help me with the volley practice (this was in quatrième (before last year of middle school) if I remember right ? but it must not have been before I learned about haikyuu). He took the time to make me practice everything and explain everything and honestly I think that helped a lot with my general technique cause otherwise there’s a lot I would not have understood or just learned wrong and would have to readjust when I got to high school.
Back to last year of middle school. My mind has been overtaken by Haikyuu cause it’s brilliant. I dabble in cosplay and I have no money I can use to buy an aliexpress one (yes the dreaded website but we would go there at the time haha) but I want to cosplay Haikyuu. Lucky me, I have found a group of cosplayer on Paris for the next Paris Manga that’s doing Haikyuu ! I was so pumped up. And they didn’t have my character but they did have his partner so we were all excited about it :) My parents were not very thrilled about it all because I was still just 14 and they were mostly adults but my mom still helped me make my own jersey! I still have it but I’m 100% sure it doesn’t fit anymore :’) Here is me starting to fall for the sport and the cosplay progress pictures I still have
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(still so proud of it, I did everything by hand !! and last pic is me with a volley ball cause I was a little deranged already)
Yes I was Akaashi, I loved that character. Acting all polite but an overthinker much with a dash of mischievous and admiration for the people around him. Also nothing grand about him like so many of the characters, but he could still hold up with them. I think I have somewhere on my computer a picture of our group but first I don’t know where it is and second you can only see my face on it so I have no picture of my finished cosplay haha. The con was amazing, I had so much fun with these people, we started hanging out a little more often and going to all the anime cons around Paris as a group and we did more group cosplays. I loved it. However at this con I lost my phone and it was in February so when I needed my dad to come pick me up I had to wait for 45 minutes in short shorts and a thin jersey :’)
After that I kept enjoying Haikyuu as one does, and high school started. Oh high school, a lot happened there. First thing I did was being reborn ! And even though it wasn’t much and only social it helped me be a little more free already. Free enough to allow myself to pursue a certain sport I was looking forward to. Yeah I got the volleyball bug. I was so happy my high school had a volleyball “club” and the first day of it we were only two. It was me and another guy, even smaller than me, who had also loved Haikyuu but we didn’t talk much about it. He was just as fired up about it as I was and we really pushed each other to become better. I don’t know what he’s become now but I hope he kept playing volleyball.
Anyway we were off to a great start with…two players. But still our coach/PE teacher was kind enough to teach us. We managed to have a few more people to come now and then but it was rough the first year. In my three years (well two but that’ll come later) we never had 6 “full time” people in the club so any kind of competition, even to get completely massacred by the other teams, was out of the question sadly. We would play on a concrete court ! It was REALLY rough haha ! But these courts were situated in a sort of closed courtyard space that was surrounded by school buildings and on the top floor were the Prepa classes (preparatory classes to get in higher education schools like engineering private schools for anyone not French reading this). Unlike the rest of my classmates, they liked playing volleyball. They were soooo tall compared to us but they would play with us and teach us some stuff and they were really good compared to us. Thanks to them we got the actual practice we needed cause you can’t learn enough by just playing 3x3 or worse 2x2 with people who can barely keep the ball in play (I was one of these people, I get to trash talk past me).
In my first year of high school I was taking riding lessons at the military school since we wouldn’t be able to go to our family’s house village with the more apparent divorce and moving out and other difficulties. It was an experience and I don’t regret doing it but it wasn’t a great place. I stopped the next year. And then…then I have memory problems. I cannot remember if it was during my second or last year of high school that I did it, but I would say it was during my second year of high school, that I entered an outside volleyball club. It was a Sunday lesson, it was all adults and it was for beginners. We would mostly do matches but sometimes they would focus on serves or hitting (I only remember one lesson about it though lol). It was super cool, I got to play volleyball on the Wednesday with my school club, whenever at lunch break when the Prepa were playing, and the Sundays at my outside club. By then, I don’t think I was reading or watching much of Haikyuu. I think I might have gotten my adhd ass hooked on something else while waiting for the next season and I had fallen in love with volleyball for the playing not just Haikyuu by then. Also something that I’m working on (and I’ve noticed it has gotten better already) is that I have a hard time appreciating watching people do something I love (usually a sport) as much as I appreciate doing the sport. For example, I never enjoyed watching any horse jumping competition even though I love doing it. I think it might come from the fact that I am bad at the things I love and therefore cannot truly appreciate what’s going on. As of right now I watch volleyball matches and rallies and really enjoy it.
Last year of high school rolls around the corner and…our PE teacher/coach tells us that they are closing the club down cause we aren’t enough and she would rather not run from our practice to the badminton’s practice (that she also coaches) and only work with the badminton’s club. After all they had the regional and potential national champions there meanwhile we had no hope of ever participating in a competition. And I had learned at my last lesson at my outside club that since we weren’t enough coming to the practice they would close down their beginner lesson. It was a bit of a shock to go from two practice per week to none at all. I missed volleyball. I accepted to participate at the badminton’s practices (cause it’s also a sport I like but at leisure, not on a competitive level, and less than volleyball) but it was just to keep me doing something. What happened though is I got to choose which sports I wanted for my BAC (high school diploma) since I was in a club the year prior and I chose the one with volleyball and I aced that. I only resented the top players of our group a little cause it wasn’t their sport at all but since they were pretty athletic and good at sports in general they had no problem being good at it when it took me sooooo long :’) yes I am petty.
Then I don’t know what the heck happened. Well yes I know but I don’t know why when I arrived in Montreal in my school I didn’t try to get into the volleyball club. Anyway, I didn’t play for a whiiiiile, years ! And the only reason I did again was because my best friend’s parents ( @nyaoi-warrior ) invited me to play with them and their friends when I visited. I was bad at communicating when I was playing in France (I often forget to say “j’ai”) but this was in Czech Rep, and we couldn’t communicate in English. It was HARD but I had so much fun !! My team lost all of the sets but it was so cool :D
Recently I was looking for something in my old stuff in the basement of the building. I didn’t find it but what I did find were my old Haikyuu manga. And oh god the flame it awoken in me. So anyway here is me a few weeks later with a volley ball in my hands, I’ve found a place I can sneak in just for the end of the year and I’ve been looking at clubs I can enter (and hopefully get better and then do some competition).
Now more about Haikyuu. What an amazing sports manga/anime it is. Of course, with the protagonist being a spiker most people when they start volleyball because of Haikyuu want to spike. I was lucky enough to be in the tall half of my year in high school but now I am tiny compared to most volleyball players. And a thing I love in volleyball I quickly discovered is diving for the ball. I’d be running far back or on the side, sliding until my knees burn to keep that ball in play. I thank Haikyuu for giving each role a time in the spotlight in almost every game they play, cause with what we learned in my school club or outside club I would never have heard of the libero. Ofc when you play for leisure having a libero is a bit meh but now I know that if I ever want to play competitive this is the role I should gun for (or maybe setter but I’m still pretty small so idk).
I just finished watching the season 4 recently and I’m on my way to catch up, and then finish with the scans (and then buying the mangas too). I got spoiled about what happens at the nationals after season 4 and what happens after, the time skip etc but just in the grand lines and I’m fine with that. I don’t think that it takes away from it too much. And (IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS AFTER/DURING TIME SKIP DON’T READ BUT ALSO WE WON’T HAVE A FULL TIME SKIP ANIMATED SO IF YOU’RE JUST WATCHING THE ANIME I’D SAY MIGHT AS WELL READ IT BUT ALSO IT’S EVERYWHERE SO YOU MIGHT KNOW IT ALREADY) I freaking love Hinata in Brazil. It’s very funny to me too cause here is this little dude who got me into volleyball, with whom I had an anime-level betrayal and tragedy with my clubs, and now I’m learning Portuguese because of my Brazilian friends and I wanna go to Brazil and HE WENT TOO ?? That was hilarious to me. Maybe I should look into beach volleyball hehehe.
About the ships; I started with the “basic” ones, the most obvious ones that come from the strong bonds and non-stop interactions and how they are shown as more or less pairs by the manga/anime (so kagehina, asanoya, daisuga, bokuaka, etc etc etc) but I am a multi shipper now. I don’t know I have a much more relaxed approach to shipping now, especially for big casts where there isn’t clear cut villains, same with one piece. They all have great relationships with everyone around them and I like many of them. And yeah I stumbled upon kenhina recently and I really like their dynamic. I love kagehina just as much, and also the hilarious way Hinata seems to fascinate all setters. I have seen some really funny tsukkihina fanarts too. I’ve put a lot of stuff in my queue so you got some yakunoya coming soon as well haha. Also from what I’ve heard (haven’t got to see it yet) (yes the premiere was Sunday and it’s only out today) that the movie has big kenhina energy so I’m here for it.
This little red-head guy just makes me so happy. I’m so glad I got to discover one of, if not my favourite sport out there (and that says a lot coming from a horsegirl) and I want to keep it in my life. I’m asking around for clubs and selections and I hope I am accepted. And I’ll be celebrating my birthday watching Olympic volleyball matches :D
OH ! Another thing. During my intensive studying period for my current school’s diploma, I was with friends and before we started studying each morning we would put on music or some kind of stuff, and we put anime opening blind tests and one of them had the first Haikyuu opening (which is still my favourite cause yk…it’s the one that started it all) and I was hit with a wall of memories…yeah :’)
I think that’s all I might have forgotten a few things, I don’t know at this point.
I can’t believe you got me writing more about volleyball, in English, in 2 hrs than I’ve written for my THESIS in a WEEK. This is 5 word pages WITHOUT THE PICTURES.
#asks#long post#sae#that was so much fun to write down but then again I love talking about volleyball#I'm so glad you're rewatching it !! I sometimes get a little scared when I go back into a fandom and drown the dash with it#but everyone has been so nice with it hahaha#I hate past me for never really getting into sports and now I have to do all the work to get my body in good shape for volleyball#ffs past Leska what the fuck#then again I know that there's a lot of things I couldn't do back then because of either family life or me trying to understand and live#my identity and yeah no playing volleyball with a binder is the worst idea possible i do not recommend but now I can play freely#i'm crazy enough that I'll believe in the possibility of going pro one day but at the end of the day I just wanna play volleyball :3#thank you so much haikyuu and thank you so much furudate you reached your goal : you got people into volleyball#I hope i answered what you wanted me to and I didn't just take a totally different route D:#anyway I hope people don't mind the onslaught of haikyuu fanarts I reblog I try to put them in the queue so they're not there all at once :
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I love your work and creativity on power couple Baatar Jr and kuvira but when will we get more of THE power couple Corvus Glaive and Proxima Midnight ?
Aaaahh thank you I'm glad you enjoy my Baatar and Kuvira stuff!! I know they're quite niche so it makes me happy to hear people like my work with them ;;
But gah yeah it has been a while since my Corvus and Proxima days, I actually miss those two a lot ;; I had a TON of content for them, a lot of it still in my folders tbh I just definitely got distracted by LoK :'D also my fire for Marvel has pretty much gone out, I haven't really been vibing with Phase 4 so my brain has just kinda moved on~ I still really love my old Marvel favs, like Ronan and Crystal as they were so important to me for so long, and of course Corvus and Proxima too, so even though I'm really not in the Marvel space anymore, I'd really love to revisit those characters sometime, especially since my art for humans/humanoid characters has improved a lot since then!
While writing this I was looking through my Corvus/Proxima folders on my computer and phone and gosh yeah there's a lot of content I never got around to finishing/posting- both art and fics ;; I had a lot of extensive stuff about my version of Proxima's species, my redesigns of everyone, as well as everyone's time before The Order came about, and especially the development of Corv and Prox's relationship. Hopefully one day I can get back to it all!
I did find this old wip in my folder as well, I still like where it's going so I'll definitely have to bring this back sometime lol I always loved the idea of Corvus' scrawny lizard ass just getting fucking Hoisted by his giant wife
#Proxima Midnight#Corvus Glaive#Corvus x Proxima#The Black Order#Marvel#Fanart#WIP#Ask Matsu#[ I honestly really miss drawing these two a lot ;A;#it makes me happy knowing people remember my older content haha#I'd like to get back to them because I had a lot of fun stuff going on with them wah#never underestimate my ability to get completely fucking Derailed by a glasses man askdjfsgf#*makes Baatar sit in time out* let someone else have some attention for once#but man Proxima still is The Woman for me I swear#others have come and gone but my love for her will forever remain#I'll never forget what she did to me in 2020#if you were there you were there alskjgfd#but yeah aah I'm sorry LoK has become my main thing for so long and just kinda drowned out everything else :'DD#I've got more original content in the works but I do wanna return to some older stuff like Prox and Corvus#Ronan and Crystal too! ]
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the flash should have ended with barry quitting his job at ccpd to become a stay-at-home husband and that's on that
#the fun part is it genuinely could have ended like that. i have no idea. still haven't watched it#NOBODY TELL ME BTW#THAT IS NOT ME ASKING FOR SPOILERS. I'LL GET TO IT#but honestly it's the only thing that makes sense. i have genuine reasons for this#namely: how the fuck is iris. an incredible but ordinary non-speedster woman. meant to look after a baby speedster#ordinary babies are already making it their life's mission to die. eating shit they shouldn't. rolling over and suffocating.#idk i don't know about kids but i know babies are breakable and will roll off tables and god knows what else#now imagine you have a toddler and she can literally move at hundreds of miles per hour#how the fuck was iris meant to cope?#i still maintain that when they did the 'she put a power dampener in nora' plot it should have been like. not a control thing#but also yeah. literally a control thing because HOW THE FUCK ELSE WAS SHE MEANT TO LOOK AFTER HER BABY#if barry is gone and she's a single mother. assuming no other speedsters are around to help her. what the fuck else was she meant to do?#of course she had to suppress her powers because how can you stop your toddler running into traffic if she can run 1000 times faster than u#how do you keep her in her crib at night if she can phase through the bars?#in that sense. yeah it's fucked up. but you can understand it. you can empathize. what other options did she have?#so yeah stay-at-home dad barry is the only thing that makes sense for genuine safety reasons#he is quite literally the only one who can keep up with the kids#they dropped the ball on nora is all i'm saying. again. fic that lives in my head where original nora's death actually means something#and we get a new nora who is ACTUALLY a different person. as she would be considering her whole upbringing was different#and she has to somehow live up to the memory of a version of her that was erased from time#part of barry and iris can't accept that that specific version of their daughter is gone and it's not her#THE ANGST POTENTIALLLL#in my head she doesn't even go by nora because she's like. THAT'S NOT ME. SHE DIED. WHY CAN'T YOU ACCEPT WHO I AM AND LOVE ME FOR ME#she goes by dawn bc yeah im still kinda sad they didnt use that name#fictional characters give ur kid an original name instead of always naming them after dead ppl challenge#my fics#my meta
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So, Jess I know you’re not an artist like your bestie in the entire world snap… but what does your art look like I remember you doodled this little pic for me of Tien with Choatzu’s make up lol but have you’ve drawn anything else?
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/6a6a3320898faa7e7d26886eb6b6afed/6e92721bd7d18213-78/s540x810/828e7025a421bf2abfb7e0461baa0b5fd9c84e45.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/359eb0af2e8749dbdb37db00aefe89c6/6e92721bd7d18213-2c/s540x810/1002a93c5858f11d9f245b8e696c1ab9a40b62dd.jpg)
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/466dadd0322c02b08f1a8d8a6581209e/6e92721bd7d18213-c4/s540x810/cbb15b32936279a0d680f58951a93c6872d25aa3.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/173dbf8e2136debec4db13c6e68634c6/6e92721bd7d18213-f8/s540x810/60db35cd5c7e98ad68978c68617320e7a413af78.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/597c5d86bc971140452fdb3fb9272005/6e92721bd7d18213-9b/s540x810/631c5f3b8b6d6d7903738a228be3e22a23ce58cd.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/cf2a86b284284c6eed0bb2fdaeb322b3/6e92721bd7d18213-8f/s540x810/d7afa10c068d9ddb31271c01a8de0ce04ac1ce40.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b340192e0dd75a2467a6ff730b618975/6e92721bd7d18213-74/s540x810/4c3a5461b3cd9999b9906a0ca857a8d709830946.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/308ad69f2435f5e7712e792479296ad5/6e92721bd7d18213-4b/s540x810/b3ee4f790da43e5d088186d1ec7fbc88579ce670.jpg)
Ya
#i draw a lot i just dont post it all the time bc well... sometimes i dont like em sometimes i forget sometimes its just a personal lil thing#i havent painted for months bc i lost my paints but Snap actually bought me some replacements for my birthday the other day so 🫶#maybe i'll try and paint daigo or somethin and post it sometime soonish#in his honour#or maybe Tsutumi bc i like his face it might be fun to do................#or another baba since i sure like daito#or maybe i will just continue doin the boys from my REDACTED group lioe i have been the past few months#i have done haruka and majima but i couldnt find the posts in my tag and im dying of a flu or maybe covid (real not clickbait)#so i dont feel like gettin up n goin on my computer. i mostly had to screenshot these from insta lol#but yeah. i do also do stuff :)#ask#also yeah we made exactly 5 days into the year before my body decided to fuck me over so uhhhhhhh bodes well#genuinely feel like ive been hit by a truck and i have such a bad headache still havent played gaiden 😭#also why does answering on tumblr mobile app lately be so weird ???#like freezes the app keeps reloading cant look at notifs til i close it and reopen ? anyone else have that issue
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I love being the always single person in my family, mad respect to my sister for constantly dating guys for the last 8 years, I would have shot myself
#whenever my mom asks if i have love news of my own while we're talking about my sister's newest catch and i say no#i hope she doesn't feel pity because like. this is the life that i choose. my sister's ex boyfriends were enough for ME even#and i only met a handful of them personally but heard more than enough shit about them#i just always think i'm only flirting with some guys only to never talk to them again or ghost them because it's fun#fat girl who's always been seen as ugly by other people gets to flirt with good looking people is the ultimate ego boost arc#if i ever date anyone seriously again it better be true love and end in kids and marriage until death or i'll live as a hermit#until that happens tho...... life is a party i don't wanna miss a thing break some men's heart get revenge yolo etc etc#also the thought of actively dating freaks me out. if i meet someone and we tolerate each other long term that's good#but dating apps or going on dates with several people and deciding who's the best like on the bachelorette?? death first#plus i lowkey don't like men as a concept. at least the type i've dated. i guess you could say my last ex traumatized me hahaha 👍🏻 (🔨🔨)#i think i'm too young to be in a committed relationship anyway. or even to seek getting into one. there are much more important things rn#i know former classmates my age are having kids or getting married but idgaf the one who got engaged last year has been with him for 7 year#which is a decent time tbh you change quite a bit during that time and if it feels right why not#but i can't wrap my head around searching for a relationship when you don't even have a stable job and know what else you want in life#rambling again sorryyyy but yeah proud single here and i'm not saying this out of spite because i genuinely enjoy it#all relationships i've been in were so draining (tbf they were long distance too) and got me at rock bottom and had me filled with regret#also these men can be so controlling and jealous when you just wanna go out with friends while they do whatever they want too#but when you say you don't want a jealous partner they think that's a free pass for them to cheat like what the actual fuck#do you see the difference between being unnecessarily jealous when you hang out with friends and being rightfully jealous when they cheat??#at this point idk what to say. i'm very entertained by my friends' dating journeys but that couldn't be me#all the gossip i provide for them is which people i flirted with for the ego and who i ghosted and who ghosted me#mel talks
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