#me x the npc I am in love with
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#sketch#wip#my art#arlefuri#furina#arlecchino#columbina#zhongli#childe#zhongchi#genshin impact#ekaterina#me x the npc I am in love with#I gave her glasses because I think it’s funny if the fatui masks can be prescription
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ykno for writing gavin's bio high i think i did an OK job!!!
#anyway self love is staying up until 6am adding a self indulgent canon x oc orientated muse to ur dumb blog#not me taking a dead villain npc from my other super secret agent oc. having the 'dead' part be faked#and having him just snake his way into COD lore like nothing happened lmAOooo#good for him tbh. gaslighting king. i cant wait for super secret agent man oc to like kill him for real when he finds out he's alive#anyway the edi is mostly worn off. now i am merely full of many thoughts#cw drug mention
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The Love Lab presents:
Boyfriend is to Husband
pairing: Miguel O’Hara x gn!Reader
summary: How would Miguel react if you did the “calling my bf my husband” trend? 🤔
content warning: It gets a little suggestive, but other than that, it’s fluff fluff fluff. There are short mentions of food, but nothing too crazy. The Miguel in here is also not Spiderman. Just a little guy.
credit for art and dividers: Me! and @kimjiho1 (plus another person for the gif divider, if this is yours, lmk!)
a/n: This will be apart of a series called The Trendy Couple! This is the first installment ☝🏾😌. I’m not sure how long the series will be, but right now it’s just based off of cute couple's trends. My fyp has suffered trying to do research for this…
word count: 2.2k
I use the word "buggy" in here. Buggy = shopping cart or trolley. I'm southern so buggy just rolls off the tongue. ❤︎ Plus, it sounds cute!
You and Miguel have been out since 8 am running errands and grabbing supplies to fill up the new apartment.
After a year of your dresser being full of his sweatpants and hoodies and his furniture hosting several of your blankets, his fridge being stocked of your favorite fruits and your shower caddy holding his body care, you both decided it was best to live together.
Towel sets, bed sheets, comforters, silverware, curtains. This was only the tip of what you and Miguel had managed to stuff inside the car.
After hitting five shops just that morning, you opted to stay in the car while Miguel went and handled a pickup order from the hardware store. It was getting closer to lunchtime and you didn’t want to become irritable because of the long lines.
To pass the time, you decided to scroll on TikTok, watching video after video, reacting to each accordingly.
First, it was chatty kitties begging for food. Then, it was edits of hot wrestlers. Next, it was ramen recipes to cook at 2am. There were even a couple of NPC lives even though the trend was nearly dying at this point.
Finally, you scrolled to a video hosting a girl and her boyfriend huddled together in a car over the console.
She’s leaned up against him, her smile beaming, “Today I’m going to be guessing my husband’s favorite things!”
“I’m not your husband,” are the words that shoot from her boyfriend’s mouth, fast as lightning. Cold. Unkind. Callous.
You watch as the girl’s smile drops and the video cuts, her laughing out of shock beforehand, evidence of her trying to stamp out her embarrassment.
You watch more as his grin widens and she gives him this awkward glance.
��Not yet,” he adds, seeing how quiet she was.
The video ends with her jumping at him playfully, trying to play the situation of.
“Jesus,” you sigh, mouth turned sideways as you pause the video and open up the comments. Thousands of people were telling her to dump him, others questioning why he would say what he said in the way that he did.
Your heart went out to the girl who clearly wanted to do a harmless joke that completely backfired.
You liked a comment about this being a possible red flag. Although he could have responded that way because he wasn’t ready for marriage, his response was so quick and distant that it was like he was disgusted at the possibility of being with her that long.
After working yourself up by scrolling through the comments, you decide to go even further by pressing the “calling my boyfriend ‘husband’” search at the top.
There were so many stitches to the original video with people giving their own thoughts about the situation. Some people were proclaimed dating coaches, others psychologists, and a few influencers.
You even see a follow up video from the original couple with the guy giving a shitty excuse as to why he was so quick in his response.
“Yeah right,” you mumble, watching the girl snicker at her boyfriend’s pouts. You agree with the comments that his response makes the original video even worse.
Still scrolling down, you find another video featuring a new couple.
They’re at a table eating donut holes out of a hat, and when the girl calls her boyfriend “husband”, the guy’s entire body lights up. He’s grinning, cheeks rosy, and can’t stop staring back at his girlfriend.
From there, you were able to see countless other couples with cute videos, all of the guys radiating at the word “husband.”
Biting your lip, you wondered how Miguel would react if you called him your husband.
You loved him with all of your heart and you were sure that he loved you. You guys are literally moving into an apartment together. But the thought of him being unsettled by you calling him your husband weighed on you.
Just as you were deep in your thoughts, you heard a knock near the trunk of the car startling you. Looking up in the rearview mirror, you see Miguel standing with a few bags and wood planks in his hands. You reach over and press a button to pop open the trunk.
“Got everything?” you ask, turning to watch as he drops items in the back.
“Yeah, I think so. Although there was almost a brawl over some potted plants,” he said. “Some older lady just came up to this guy and snatched his monsteras.”
“What?” you respond, watching as he closed the trunk and walked around to the driver's seat. “Out of his hands or the buggy?”
Miguel laughed, both recalling the scene and finding your terms adorable. “She just came up and snatched it out of the cart while he was waiting at the end of the line. She swore that she saw it first.”
You listened to him retell the story, hand under your chin as you leaned closer. He was cute, lilt in his voice to make an impression of the plant thief. Thinking to yourself that you liked this little moment of playfulness, you take your phone out to record.
Placing your phone in a case attached to the dashboard, you smile at the camera while Miguel’s still going.
“‘You youngins think the world owes you everything, and that’s just not the case!’ And the poor guy is standing there going ‘ma’am, I just want my plant back.’ He looked so distressed.”
“I would be too! A random lady just shopped from my buggy. It’s like, why are you this close to me to see what I’m trying to buy?”
Miguel turns the car on and buckles up. “It started to escalate when the lady’s friend came over. Then there were two shrill voices fussing at this guy.”
He started to back the car out of the parking spot, hand behind your seat and head turned towards the back window.
You slowly glanced at his arm, eyes tracing a vein up his shirt.
Too bad you were in a car right now or else you’d let his arm wrap around you elsewhere.
You tune back into his words, silently scolding yourself for letting something so simple get you to fold.
“Luckily, I was able to calm them both down. All it took was me showing them some dasheen leaves,” he said, driving the car closer to the exit of the parking lot.
You came to a conclusion. There was no better time than the present.
“Aw, look at my husband. Saving the day with his genius,” you say, hand reaching out to pat his chest.
Then you feel your body jerk to the right. The seat belt tightens as the car jerkingly swerves in between two parking spaces.
You stare in a panic at Miguel who puts the car in park and turns his entire body towards you.
“What did you just call me?” he asks, eyes searching yours, a little startled but mostly hopeful.
You decide to keep the charades going, “I was just praising my husband for stopping the creation of another Karen video. Why did you turn the car like that?” You’re still looking at him as if he has two heads.
“You just-!” Miguel takes your hands into his and places his forehead on his fists. “Baby, you know what you just said.”
You laugh, a little giddy. “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”
Miguel leans back against his seat and closes his eyes, reaching down to take his seatbelt off. His eyebrows scrunch up as he brings your hand to his chest, “Feel my heartbeat.”
Your mouth drops as you feel his heart rattling against his chest. He really wasn’t being dramatic.
“Baby look at me,” you grab his hands and hold them tight. “You did a good job today.”
His breath stopped, as he looked at you. His face was tinted from the whole fiasco.
“Husband.”
Miguel’s entire body slumped as he grinned wide. He nearly jumped over the console to sag his body onto yours.
His shoulders were shaking and you heard his laugh muffled by your shoulder. You wrap your arms around him and make a face at the camera.
“What’s up, Mig?” you say, trying to get him to talk.
He mumbled into your clothes, shoulders still shaking.
“I can’t hear you, you gotta sit up.”
He sits up and sniffles, turning his head toward the backseat.
Looking at his profile you can see a few streaks down his face.
“Are you crying?” you ask, turning his face towards yours.
Miguel swipes his wrist across his cheeks, “Stop, this is extremely embarrassing.”
“No, it’s not! I promise it’s not,” you say, rubbing your thumb across his ear. “Talk to me.”
He chuckled, eyes looking down, “It just feels really good to know that you think of me that way. We don’t have to ever cross that line, but one day, if you would like, we can make that title true.”
“Is this a pre-proposal?” you ask, heartbeat in your ears. You went out on a limb to follow a trend, not knowing how it would end. Now you’re staring at Miguel’s flushed face with his heart pouring out into your lap.
“Maybe,” he whispered, grabbing your hands. “Possibly a promise for what could be.”
You bite your lip to hold back a grin, “Can I know what could be right now?”
“And expose my plans? Not a chance,” Miguel smirked. “Besides, a husband knows what’s best for his partner, right?”
“He does,” you quip, rubbing your hand in a circle on his chest. “He also apparently forgets that SUVs can flip very easily.”
“Lo siento, mi amor,” he says, looking sheepishly at the placement of the car. “Did I startle you?”
You just giggle at his concern and give him a quick peck on the mouth. “Yeah, I wasn’t expecting that big of a reaction.”
“How would you react if I casually called you forever mine? While driving!”
“Go 90 in a 70,” you joke. “Maybe pull over and do a little more than make out.” You rub your hand down his chest, and squeeze playfully at his pec.
Miguel stared back at you, body instantly reacting to the shift in conversation. “We can actually do that right now.”
He leaned forward and brought your lips to his. You could taste the mint from the gum he had earlier, humming when he pushed further into your mouth.
He started to reach for your hips, ready to pull you over onto his lap.
Your stomach let out a loud grumble, making you jump.
“Ok, let’s try this again after we get you some food,” Miguel says, plastering kisses on your face.
The day moves on smoothly with Miguel not letting you out of his sight, hands itching to hold you in some way.
He also never lets the husband thing go.
As you’re ordering lunch, “One lemonade for my baby. And a water with lemon for me, the husband.”
As you stop in a clothing store at the mall for a small break, “These say boyfriend jeans. Do they have any husband jeans?”
As you’re trying to reach the top shelf to grab the last of your favorite detergent, “No, cariño. Let your husband get it for you.”
As you’re looking for throw pillows and towel sets for the apartment, “You think they have a couple’s set? I want something that says ‘Mr.’ on it.”
As you stop at a gift store, looking for something extra to give to the movers, “Look, this shirt says it’s made of ‘hubby material.’ Should I get it?”
This feeling is only amplified when you post his initial reaction online. The comments were full of people yearning to be in your predicament.
“If my boyfriend doesn’t crash the car when I call him husband, THROW HIM AWAY. 😒”
“Does he have a brother….asking for a friend”
“I needed this after the “I’m not your husband” he in LOVE”
“If your bf doesn’t cry at the thought of you, what are you doing”
“He was blushing HARRRRD 😭😭😭”
“So when’s the wedding? 🤨”
“He was literally cheesing and crying omg”
“Get you a man that stops the car to declare his love”
“What if I did a five mile marathon on i-55”
“He’s so in love with you that it’s palpable”
“He was ready do a lot more than make out 😭”
Miguel saw most things, a little embarrassed but mostly happy that so many people found him to be genuine.
You laid on his shoulder as he checked the comments, liking the funny ones as they passed by.
“Do you want to make a response video?” you say, liking a comment going ‘he’s a good man, Savannah.’
“No, I think this is enough,” he replies, handing the phone back to you. “Let me keep a little mystery. At least until I actually propose, of course.”
You looked at him with stars in your eyes.
“A mysterious husband. I kind of like the sound of that,” you say, wrapping your body around his side. “Maybe I can be nosy, find out his secrets.”
“I bet you would, cariño,” he voiced, nuzzling his chin on top of your head. “After, everything is planned and done.”
You laughed and snuggled closer, happy to be with him.
Once again, I hope you enjoyed reading! ❣️
Any likes, reblogs, and comments are appreciated and welcomed.
I'm excited for the future of this series and I hope you guys are too. When I finish the series masterlist, I'll link it here. If you guys have any trends that you want me to include, then just let me know and I'll see what I can do!
- Blue ♡
#love lab fics 🧫#husband jeans 👖#The Trendy Couple 💟#miguel o’hara x reader#miguel x reader#miguel o’hara x gn!reader#miguel ohara#miguel o’hara fluff#spider man 2099#nerdy?miguel idk#soft miggy 🥺#miguel o'hara x you#miguel o'hara fanfiction
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horns — neuvillette x f!reader
a/n: i gotta work on wriothesley's
“papa!” your little girl coos, reaching out for her dad’s horns. her little hands hold them delicately as she kicks her legs and giggles.
she is so occupied by her dad that she notice you putting down a tray of her favorite cookies. you smile at her before leaning towards your husband.
“looks like someone else likes your horns as much as I do,” you tease neuvillette who’s busy smiling fondly at his little girl, before he looks up at you.
your arms are wrapped around his shoulders from behind. the hold you have on him is so comforting, so light and he can't help how his eyes soften and body further relaxes.
tenderness swim in his eyes, and he looks down at her again, “she looks just like you,” he sighs in contentment, “I couldn’t be happier.”
your heart clenches and you cup his face to press a gentle kiss to his cheek.
from the corner of your eyes, you notice your daughter repeatedly patting her head. a look of worry instantly appears on your husband’s face, “d/n, are you alright? what’s the matter?”
your daughter frowns lightly when she taps the top of her head with her two hands once more. she grabs a bit of her hair, but, apparently, she doesn’t find what she is looking for.
her lips jut out as she points at your husband’s horns, “pa?”
he hums in confusion then looks at you, hoping that with motherly super powers, you can understand her.
a few beats pass by before it clicks in your head, and you start smothering her face in kisses, “oh you absolute cutie!” she squeals as she drowns in your affection, “don’t worry! you will get horns and look just like your pretty papa in no time!”
neuvillette is a little puzzled, looking back and forth at your daughter then you. you smile before tapping his horns then tapping her head. he reaches out to hold her, and your girl practically throws herself at him.
he rests his cheek on the top of her head then he closes his eyes and presses a kiss to the top of her head, making her giggle. you sneak away to get a headband that’s been bought for this very moment.
you come back, said headband hidden behind your back, and you usher both your husband and your little girl in front of the mirror. neuvillette quietly sits with your little girl comfortably on his lap.
she stares at the mirror, until your husband starts to lightly bounce her on his legs. she squeals, putting her hands in her mouth then looking up at him, “pa!”
“okay, d/n, look at the mirror for a moment,” you say as you situate the headband on her head, “and voila!,” you kneel beside her, “see? you look just like papa!”
you don’t know who is more in awe, your daughter or your husband. the little girl is basically speechless, and your husband’s eyes have an endless stream of stars swimming in them.
“she does look like me,” he mutters, hold tightening just a tiny bit.
he lets out a breath, before bending slightly to gently rest his forehead on top of your daughter’s little head. he smiles softly, “I am…happy.”
he turns to you, eyes full fondness and love, “thank you.”
you think the bright clear weather that day was no coincidence.
taglist: @magenta-cat-drawingss @pompompurin1028 @scul-pted @requiem626k @nameless-shrimp @sonder-paradise @jessbeinme15s-notebook @todorokichills @ginneko @missrown @shrynkk @simplyxsinned @beautiful-is-boring @starlostlaiba @izukus-gf @irethepotato @thekaylahub @dazaisbloodybandages @aeanya @sweetcloudsimp @moon-catto @the-midnightskies@pianopuppygirl @gojosblackqueen @kryscent @kunikida-simp @whoami-72 @mx-0-child @fiona782 @kisakitwister @imjustasimpxd @psychopotatomeme @dreamcastgirl99 @watyousayin @doobiebochana @laylasbunbunny @hojicha-expresso @4sat0ruu @nineooooo @chuuyasboots @alekssashka7 @rieejjyubi02 @satoryaa @nothisispatrick300 @fallencrescentmoon @etheviese @ho34gojo @the-mom-friend-dot-com @the-weeping-author @stray-npc @libbyistired @anon1412 @anakalana @maehemthemisfit @satorustar @b4nka1 @sad-darksoul @ko-fi-heart @pumpkindudeishere @suyaaachin
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do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported
#neuvillette x reader#neuvillette x you#neuvillette x y/n#neuvillette fluff#genshin x reader#genshin x you#genshin x y/n#neuvillete x reader#neuvillette headcanons#genshin imagines#gi x reader#gi neuvillette#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact x you#genshin fluff#neuvillette fanfic#neuvillette imagines
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Madly in love with how you write the twst cast its all so good genuinely read the idia x sentient npc one and its SO GOOD I THINK NBJVSD
Tossing in a request since it seems like theyre open,,
How about headcanons oneshot whatever you feel like writing, for Azul in mer form x a reader, who understands what he feels about himself, since before they were frequently bullied too, giving way for reader having a terrible self esteem and image of themselves, so when they happen to see him in merform, with the knowledge of his own opinions of his merform, theyre actively being incredibly encouraging and affectionate towards him maybe moreso than normal, to show they arent gonna hate him for just being himself
Romantic preferred but go with whatever ya wanna if you do end up writin, have a good day ! :]
Good enough - Azul x Reader
Thank you so much!! I'm really glad you liked it! 🫶 and thanks for the request <3 I hope you like it!
Azul had always been self-conscious about his merform. He’d avoid showing it at any cost, especially to you. The sight of his tentacles felt like a reminder of everything he was insecure about. His mind was quick to dredge up memories of those who had ridiculed him—distant echoes that still haunted him.
But today, fate had conspired against him.
You didn’t mean to stumble upon him while he was in his merform, swimming quietly in a private lagoon, seeking solitude. The moment your eyes met his, Azul froze. Panic coursed through him, and his tentacles twitched in agitation. He wanted to flee, to hide, to get out of sight before you said anything that might sting.
Azul immediately tried to disappear beneath the water, a soft ripple marking where he’d submerged. But you could see the tips of his tentacles, still close to the surface, betraying his location.
“Azul?” you called out gently, trying not to spook him. “You don’t have to hide from me.”
A few bubbles rose to the surface. Slowly, his head appeared again, water cascading off his shoulders. He wouldn’t meet your gaze, his eyes averted in shame. “I… didn’t think you’d be here.”
“Neither did I,” you said with a light chuckle, settling yourself by the water's edge. “But since I am, why don’t you talk to me?”
He hesitated, tentacles curling around him protectively. His gaze flickered up briefly before darting back down again. It wasn’t like Azul to look so… vulnerable. You waited patiently, giving him the time to collect his thoughts, refusing to press too hard.
Finally, with a heavy sigh, he whispered, “I know I shouldn’t care. It’s been years. I’ve built myself up to be powerful, untouchable.” He paused, his voice trembling slightly. “But… the bullying… it still got to me more than I’d like to admit.”
The admission felt like it had been pulled from deep within him, something he’d kept buried for far too long. It hurt to hear him speak with such anguish, the usually confident Azul now stripped of his armor.
You slid closer, dipping your feet into the water as if bridging the distance between you could make your words sink deeper. “Azul, that doesn’t make you weak. It doesn’t make you less than what you’ve become.”
Azul’s eyes flicked up to you, filled with a mixture of surprise and uncertainty. His tentacles, once coiled tightly around him, relaxed just slightly.
“Those people—they didn’t define you. You’ve done that for yourself,” you continued, voice steady and firm. “And you’ve built something incredible, something they could never take from you. But it’s okay if it still hurts. You don’t have to pretend with me.”
He was silent for a long moment, letting your words sink in. Slowly, his tentacles began to uncurl further, stretching out in the water like a silent surrender.
“You know, I was bullied too when I was younger."
Azul's gaze flickered, his usual composure faltering. He wasn't expecting that. You had always seemed so confident, so at ease. He could scarcely imagine you feeling the same shame he had once felt.
"I get it. People can be cruel, and they don’t need a good reason to tear you down. I thought it was because something was wrong with me… because I wasn’t ‘good enough’ for them to be kind."
Azul remained silent, but you saw his posture relax ever so slightly. You continued, voice softer, “But I’m starting to realize… that I’m not what they said I was. And neither are you.”
His tentacles curled in close again, an instinctive defense. His voice was hesitant when he spoke. “And what am I, in your eyes?”
You let out a small chuckle, shaking your head. “Someone who doesn’t have to hide. Someone who’s clever, capable… and worth being proud of. Tentacles or not.”
Azul was staring now, looking for any trace of deception or insincerity in your words. But he found none. Instead, he found your gentle gaze, filled with admiration that made his heart race in ways he couldn’t quite explain.
"You’re... not disgusted?" he asked softly, the vulnerability in his tone almost breaking your heart.
"Disgusted?" You laughed gently. "Azul, no way. Actually..." You leaned in conspiratorially, "I think you look beautiful."
Azul looked at you then, truly looked at you. His eyes were wide with surprise, as though he couldn’t believe what you’d just said. Slowly, his lips quirked up into a faint smile, tentative but genuine.
“Beautiful, huh?” he asked softly, a touch of amusement in his tone, but there was something deeper in his gaze—something vulnerable and hopeful.
You smiled back at him. “Absolutely. And, Azul… you don’t have to hide from me. I see you. All of you. And I’m not going anywhere.”
His heart stuttered in his chest. He’d never expected to hear words like that, not directed at him, not sincerely. And from you? Someone he held in such high regard? Azul wasn’t sure how to respond, so he did the only thing he could—he let your words sink in.
As he studied you—his tentacles uncoiling slowly in the water—you reached out, your hand grazing the smooth surface of one of them. His breath hitched, but you didn’t pull away. Instead, your touch was light, affectionate. Comforting.
For the first time in a long while, Azul felt… accepted. He felt like he didn’t need to hide, not from you. The world might still be cruel, but with you by his side, it didn’t seem so overwhelming.
In a quieter voice, you added with a teasing grin, “Plus, if anyone has a problem with your tentacles, you could just... slap them out of the way, right?”
Azul’s laugh bubbled up unexpectedly—rich and genuine. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
You both shared a warm silence for a moment before he raised one of his hands from the water. His fingers were delicate and graceful as he reached for yours, gently intertwining them. “Thank you… for seeing me.”
You gave his hand a small squeeze, your voice filled with determination. “You don’t have to thank me, Azul. I’m always going to see you.”
As you sat there, your hand intertwined with Azul's, the world seemed to slow down around you. The soft ripple of the water, the gentle warmth of the sun filtering through the lagoon, the quiet intimacy of the moment—it all felt like a perfect bubble outside of reality. You couldn’t help but notice the way Azul’s fingers fit so naturally with yours, his touch unexpectedly warm and comforting.
Azul’s gaze was locked on you, something unreadable and intense flickering in his deep blue eyes. His tentacles, which had once been so tightly coiled, now drifted lazily in the water, brushing lightly against your legs. There was a new kind of softness to him, a vulnerability that he’d only ever shown to you.
“You really are something special,” he repeated, this time with a weight that made your heart skip a beat.
His voice was low, almost reverent, and it sent a shiver down your spine. The smile on your lips faltered for a moment as the air around you seemed to shift, charged with a sudden tension that was anything but uncomfortable. Azul’s eyes flickered down to your hands, his thumb brushing over your knuckles in a slow, deliberate motion.
“You’re the only one who’s ever seen me like this,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “The only one who’s ever made me feel… worthy”
Your breath caught in your throat, and you felt your heart pounding in your chest. His words, so genuine and vulnerable, struck a chord deep within you. You hadn’t expected him to open up like this, hadn’t anticipated the way your own emotions would swell in response.
“And you…” Azul’s voice softened even more as he met your gaze again, his eyes glinting with something that made your pulse quicken. “You’re the first person who’s ever made me feel truly seen.”
There was a pause—a heartbeat where neither of you moved, and yet everything seemed to change. You weren’t sure who leaned in first, but suddenly, the distance between you was closing, the world narrowing to just the two of you. The scent of saltwater hung in the air, mingling with the warmth of his presence.
Azul’s free hand came up to cup your cheek, his touch feather-light as though you were something fragile, precious. He studied your face with an intensity that made your cheeks heat, his expression soft but filled with something deeper, something that made your chest ache.
Then, before you could process it, Azul gently pressed his lips to yours. The kiss was soft and sweet, almost hesitant at first, as though he were testing the waters. But the moment your lips met, it felt like everything around you disappeared—the lagoon, the past, the pain of old memories—none of it mattered in that moment.
You responded in kind, leaning into the kiss, your hand tightening around his as if to ground yourself in the reality of it all. His lips were warm against yours, soft and reassuring, and the taste of the sea lingered faintly on them. It was a quiet, tender kiss, filled with unspoken promises and a vulnerability that neither of you had dared show the world before now.
When you finally pulled apart, both of you were breathless, foreheads resting against each other as you shared the same space, the same air. Azul’s gaze lingered on you, his eyes dark and warm with a depth of affection you hadn’t expected to see there.
“You’re beautiful,” you whispered, your voice soft but unwavering. “Inside and out.”
Azul closed his eyes for a moment, exhaling a shaky breath. When he opened them again, they were filled with something warm and tender, something that made your heart feel like it was swelling in your chest.
“And you,” he said quietly, his voice filled with emotion, “are more than I ever deserved.”
You laughed softly, shaking your head. “Azul, you deserve everything.”
Azul smiled at you, the expression soft and genuine in a way that made your heart flutter. His hand still cradled your cheek, and as he leaned in again, brushing his lips gently against your forehead, you couldn’t help but feel like, for the first time in a long time, you both had finally found something—someone—worth holding onto.
And in that soft, intimate moment, beneath the soft sunlight, it felt as though the walls he’d carefully built around himself were beginning to fall. Not entirely gone, but for the first time, Azul felt he didn’t need them quite as much—not with you here, not with the way you looked at him, like he was something precious.
Masterlist
#twst#twst x reader#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#azul x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#azul#azul ashengrotto#hurt/comfort#reverse comfort
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I'm going for gold, lads, lasses, and other gendered classes!
Do you like visual novels? Do you like stories about the fey? Do you like your entertainment as EDUTAINMENT?
IF SO, BOY HOWDY DO I HAVE A VISUAL NOVEL PROJECT FOR YOU.
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The Good People (Na Daoine Maithe) is a lore-rich and choice-driven romantic visual novel inspired by Irish mythology. Play as an Irish tenant farmer from the mid-19th century, whose path becomes inexplicably entwined with fairy affairs after getting robbed by the roadside and lured into the mythic and war-torn world of Tír na nÓg: A once unified land, now divided into the Seelie and Unseelie Courts. Will you escape with your stolen belongings? Or does fate have something else in mind?
OKAY, BUT WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR YOU, SEEKER OF SEROTONIN?
6 wonderful romantic/PLATONIC options (each love interest can be pursued entirely platonically)
a visual novel whose philosophy is less on anxiety-inducing, arbitrary choices to get a good or bad ending, but instead focuses on if you, the player, are interacting with a character in a healthy or unhealthy manner, leading to player freedom and choice
intelligent and reflective writing that is reflected within character moments and dialogue
and MORE! (so much more!)
WHERE CAN I FIND MORE OUT ABOUT THIS GAME?
Here is the bio link, which has links for the indie developers' social media accounts (Tumblr, Twitter, Discord Server) along with the link to their official website, which has a deep dive into every main NPC and the philosophy of the game. The demo is out now and free on both Steam and Itch.io
(As an official statement: I am in no way employed or affiliated with Moirai Myths and I was not approached in any way to make this post. This is me being a feral fan on main, blazing this post)
EDIT:
HELLO EVERYONE! DID YALL KNOW THE KICKSTARTER FOR THIS GAME JUST LAUNCHED TODAY? NOW YOU DO! MORE DETAILS AND MORE FUN TO BE HAD!
They’re doing voice acting reveals this month, along with an early bird special to see blushing/flirty emotes!
EDIT THE SECOND:
WE HAVE REACHED FULL FUNDING WITH THE GAME! Which is excellent, because it means that my little hyperfixation is gonna be made!
However!
It would be very nice if we could reach some of the stretch goals (which go into depth here: x). Not only are they fun (MC customization, a switch port, expanded voice-over work, more sprites, mini-games, side stories), but I think they'd spark a lot of serotonin for folks playing (myself included).
If this post has interested you at all, please, please, please check out the Kickstarter above! Thank you!
EDIT THE THIRD
Since this is still getting notes beyond my wildest dreams:
Hello! It's been a while! The Kickstarter ended a bit ago (I did not update this post when it did end, due to being ecstatic to how much the project managed to get: 130% funding!), but development is ongoing and strong! The first two routes are in development right now. Please keep tuned at @moiraimyths for official development updates!
#visual novel#kinetic novel#indie otome#otome game#otome#dating sim#interactive fiction#visual storytelling#visual story#romance game#romance visual novel#english otome#otome romance#dating game#gaming#steam#itchio#steam demo#itchio demo#computer game#amare game#amare#Youtube
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SCREAMS
『 So this is love..? 』
Characters: Victoria Shard, Clarabella, Aldrich Edelweiss (@revivemyreverie)
Pairing: Victoria Shard x Aldrich Edelweiss
Mentioned: Lady Larissa, Valentine Edelweiss
Synopsis: Love can come in many different forms. One of which involves blood soaked fingertips.
Warning(s): Implied murder, Aldrich being Aldrich, mentions of Aldrich killing a girl, me not being normal about them, how did this oneshot even get conceptualized, potential ooc
[ Apologies for any out of character ]
[ Reblogs > Likes ]
♝•°•═════ஓ๑【 ♛ 】๑ஓ═════•°•♝
▹ †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†
↳ Victoria Shard, the beautiful manipulator
It was a beautiful night in the Edelweiss empire. The imperial family had taken great lengths to make sure that tonight's gala was one nobody could forget.
Aldrich was not among them.
He found the event lifeless and mundane, not to mention the number of witches in his midst didn't make it any better.
Aldrich began narrowing his eyes at his younger brother, Valentine, whilst he was mingling with the other nobles.
The servant beside him hesitated in pouring him another glass. “My lord,” they called out. “You seem to be in a sour mood. Might I pour more refreshments into your glass?”
Aldrich shook his head. “No,” he replied bluntly, little to no expression on his face. “That won't be necessary.”
Pursing their lips, the servant beside him gave him a curt yet nervous nod before backing away to give Aldrich his space.
The fact that I'm required to participate in such events is already a pain as it is…. Aldrich thought, leaning against his father's throne - The one he was ‘destined’ to sit on as the heir.
He clicked his tongue in annoyance. And there's quite the number of witches in appearance…. If I'd had my knife with me, I would've….
He chuckled sinisterly at that thought. “I'll put that into consideration. In case…. One of them is enabling my already putrid mood.”
His words easily disturbed the servants nearby, as well as the other guests. Alas, that didn't seem to stop the numerous princesses, duchesses, or some daughters of a marquess or viscount from ogling at him.
He slouched ever so slightly, his frown deepening.
“If only you were here, my savior…”
▹ †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†
“So this is the girl?”
“Yes, my lady.”
Clicking her tongue, Victoria placed her hand over her hip, glowering at the poor girl looking up at her - Tied to a chair, mouth covered by rags and slightly bruised.
“Give me information,” Victoria ordered.
The servant beside her - Clarabella - nodded, unbothered by the muffled cries of the girl.
“Name, lady Larissa. Daughter of viscount Larissa,” Clarabella continued, keeping her eyes closed. “An avid churchgoer, and strikingly similar in appearance to the girl prince Edelweiss had once searched for upon said girl's death.”
A hum left Victoria's lips. “I see….” she looked back at Clarabella. “Anything else?”
Clarabella shook her head. “Not much, your grace. However, it should be worth noting that Lady Larissa's presence should upset Prince Edelweiss.”
Or rather, both Edelweiss princes. Victoria knew that much.
She also knew of her lovely Aldrich's little secret. He killed that girl from the choir, all because she had been - in some way - involved with his brother.
And yet she didn't care.
A smile fell upon Victoria's face. One as sinister and bone-chilling as Aldrich's. How endearing…
From the nearby table, she picked up a knife. One that she had ‘borrowed’ from Aldrich.
With a simple motion, she grazed the edge of the knife against Lady Larissa's jaw. “You did nothing to me…” her jaw clenched. “And yet you continue to be such a nuisance.”
She let out a breath once blood was drawn from the jaw. Neither Clarabella nor Lady Larissa could tell if it was out of satisfaction or exasperation.
Suddenly, she pointed the knife at Clarabella. “This girl has no sense of importance to me,” Victoria spoke bluntly. “And yet…”
Clarabella bowed her head, beginning to leave the room - Well aware of what her mistress was about to do.
Leaving her with Lady Larissa - tied up, weeping, in her final resting place.
“Some part of me wants to tear you apart, myself…. If not for me, then for Aldrich.”
▹ †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†
His mood dampened as the night went on. Nothing seemed amusing enough, it seems.
The longer the night prolonged, the more witches came his way. And alas, Aldrich had not brought his knife with him.
Hell, he didn't even seem to hear the sound of trumpets blaring when it came time to announce the entrance of a guest who arrived.
That is…. Until their name was uttered.
“Presenting, lady Victoria Shard, heiress to the house of Shard!”
Aldrich shifted in his seat, eyes suddenly wide with his lips parted. In the distance, Victoria looked back at him, a radiant smile donning her face.
She was gorgeous.
When she finally approached, Aldrich took in every single little detail of the features of her face, body, and even the gown she wore.
The gown, the most. Intricate lace-made sleeves, and lovely ebony silks. Subtle, simple.
Yet breathtaking.
In the corner of Aldrich's eye, he catches a glimpse of red on the hem of Victoria's skirt. Visible enough to make it seem like a deliberate design choice, but not large enough to be the first thing anyone sees.
He knew better than to assume it was a deliberate design choice on his savior's part. Of course he would.
Kissing the back of her gloved hands, Aldrich looked up with a dashing smile. “My savior,” he said. “Care for a promenade in the gardens?”
Chuckling, Victoria removed his hand from hers to lift his chin. “In the gardens? Rather scandalous, don't you think?”
He giggled, relishing in the sound of her voice like it was a sound from Apollo's lyre. He nodded, wrapping an arm around hers and escorting her out of the ballroom, and into the gardens.
In doing so, he advised his brother to take over as ‘star of the show’. Much to his dismay.
▹ †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†
“In the shining moonlight, you continue to bewitch me with the dazzling gleam of those lovely sapphires in the sockets of your eyes, my darling savior.”
She giggled while he guided her around the garden. “Oh my,” she replied. “Do I take that as a good thing, or a bad thing?”
His smile widened a little. “Take it however you'd like, my dear. You shan't escape my grasp now after months of being together.”
Victoria smirked. “That I am aware of, my prince,” she spoke, kissing the top of his head.
Hearts seemed to appear in Aldrich's eyes at that moment. My prince. Sevens, that sounded incredible when she said it.
“My prince,” Victoria called out. “Don't you think this is a bit scandalous? Two of us, promenading here, unchaperoned?”
He chuckled, knowing full well that this was her way of teasing him. Nodding mischievously, Aldrich walked slightly ahead of her and turned around - The moon illuminating his silhouette behind him.
“Do you hate such a thing, my dear?”
Crossing her arms, Victoria shook her head in amusement, smile softening. “Oh, I could never.”
Very quickly halfway through their walk, Victoria noticed how Aldrich guided her throughout the garden.
It was almost like he was maneuvering her around to avoid running into something. Was he perhaps hiding something from her?
That shan't be the case. But then again, knowing Aldrich, Victoria knew that the possibility of avoiding a recently rotted corpse wouldn't be out of the question.
Besides, she'd do the same. Regardless, she thought it'd be good to bring that topic to light.
“Aldrich,” the young man in question soon found Victoria by his side once more. He looked up at her, tilting his head in curiosity, wondering what she was going to say.
“Are you maneuvering me around the garden?”
Aldrich paused, slowing down as he walked.
“My savior…” For a moment, and only for a moment, Aldrich's expression darkened. “Whatever do you mean?”
In tandem, Victoria matched his energy. Only this time, she didn't falter her now darkened expression.
“You shouldn't try hiding the truth from me, my dear,” she now stood in front of him, lifting his head by its chin just as she did moments before. Only this time, it was for a different reason.
“Please, my dear, do tell me the truth.”
She soon moved her hand from his chin to his cheek, eyes softening. In response, Aldrich placed his own hand over Victoria's.
“I have not a clue what you're on about, my savior,” he replied, leaning into her touch.
Eyes narrowing slightly, Victoria inched closer to his face. “You need not hide the truth from me, Aldrich.”
It was odd, really. Her own way of saying: I don't care what you do, I'd still love you, anyway.
Sighing, Aldrich leaned his forehead against hers. “You know me far too well for my own good, my darling.”
That essentially confirmed all of Victoria's suspicions. And she didn't need to know any more than that.
Slowly, in an attempt to ‘beg’ for her forgiveness, Aldrich removed her gloves. He kissed the back of her bare hand now, almost far too passionately than he had originally intended.
And when he pulled away, he looked back at his beloved, smiling.
He didn't utter a word about her blood-soaked fingertips. Because he couldn't give a damn.
In their eyes, they can call whatever they see - As love.
♝•°•═════ஓ๑【 ♛ 】๑ஓ═════•°•♝
Taglist
🥥 @starry-night-rose @windbornearchon @nem0-nee @authoruio @fumikomiyasaki @sakuramidnight15
@revivemyreverie @revolllutionary @spadecentral @geminiiviolets @oseathepebble @twsted-princess @vaporvipermedia @vivaresmala @celiica @grandi-flora
#on side note this made me realize I should probably write NPC profiles for Valentine and all dat#anyways#WUAGWUEGAJWH EHEHEHEHEHHEHEEHHEHEHE#me when yan x yan (i am sent 2 a mental ward)#u say u can’t write his dialogue and then present me literal gold#i want to eat this. i want to eat the words.#anyways the way Aldrich is being a total grump until Victoria shows up#obsessed I see🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄#VICTORIA KILLING A RIVAL IS NOT SMTH I SAW COMING#BUT I LOVE IT#YANDERES!!!!!!!#some white haired girl:#Victoria: YOU.#murderers 2gether u love to see it#THE REMOVAL OFT THE GLOVES FOR CHU JM KMS /j#ty for the meal again Rosie#dines like a king
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Hey there... I'm terribly angry about something big and outside of my control at the moment. Could you let me know what you'd think the BG3 companions do if Tav started self destructing? Like Tav passing harsher judgments, snapping at neutral NPCs, or fighting more dangerously and recklessly with bad guys?
hiii! i am sorry for the delay, but here is how i think it will go for the bg3 ladies and a tav who is self-destructing. i hope it can bring you a little comfort during this rough time. sending you all the love!
bg3 ladies helping a self-destructing tav (x reader)
sfw, but i still prefer no minors
cw: self-destructing behavior, some tough love, fluff!!
word count: 2000+ (each is roughly 450-550)
tav, who is usually calm and collected, is showing signs of self-destruction. they are speaking differently than usual, taking a riskier approach to confrontations, snapping at innocent bystanders, and fighting more recklessly when in danger. the following baldur’s gate 3 ladies take note of this and decide on how to proceed.
lae'zel
at first, lae’zel doesn’t notice anything wrong. she does notice the change in behavior and attitude but doesn’t necessarily see it as a bad thing. the action that ticks it off for her, however, is witnessing you fighting a bit more recklessly than usual. she admires your tenacity and can sense your anger, but she also senses something more. for her, her anger is not a weakness, but a strength, which is why it takes her a moment. she is not used to seeing that side of you, so she grows a bit concerned. her first intervention is trying to get between you and your target. it’s not that she doesn’t think you can handle it; she just cannot risk seeing you hurt yourself any more than you already are. she doesn’t even care if you get angry with her, either. she’ll snap back and remind you to stop being so careless. it’s just her way of protecting you. she notices something is really wrong when she sees more out-of-character occurrences from you. she watches you closely with her hand on her blade, just in case you find yourself in trouble. she wonders if staying back and silent is the best course of action when you are going through this, but she ultimately decides to approach you about it. she lets the rest of the party get a bit ahead of you while staying back and walking by your side. “zhak vo'n'ash duj,” she says softly. “what is the matter?” she’s not versed in any sort of means of comfort, but she does try what she has seen from you and the others. if it were any other githyanki, you may be told to suck it up and carry on… but lae’zel can see you’re hurting, and she wants so badly to protect you from yourself. as she waits for an answer, she will look around to ensure that the others don’t see before she runs her hand up your back slowly. she understands if you choose not to tell her at that moment, but she still tries to be soft with you about it, especially after trying the tough love approach earlier. she doesn't leave your side until after she sees your expression soften, to which she looks around again and plants a kiss on your forehead. she shares a small smile with you as you continue on your journey. later, when you’re able to get a moment alone, lae’zel offers to let you fight her to get all your feelings out. battle helps her express how she’s feeling, so she swears that it’ll help you. she’ll go a bit easy on you, letting you get all the hits you need in. she won’t stop until after you’ve called it quits. and afterward, when you’re ready, she’ll take you to a nearby water source to wash up and just talk under the moonlight. lae’zel won’t be able to rest that night until you’re feeling better. in bed, she’ll offer you some wise githyanki words as she runs her hands up your arms, fully embracing the cuddling session you find yourselves in. she’s come to enjoy it quite a lot, and she hopes that this instance will bring you the comfort she struggles with bringing herself.
minthara
minthara, with all of her astuteness, notices rather quickly that something is the matter with you. if it’s not by your body language while communicating, it’s by your tone and vocabulary. she takes great pride in knowing you so well that she can pick apart the tiny details about your mannerisms. even with this, she’ll let your actions go on for a little bit because she doesn’t quite see anything wrong in how you’re acting. in fact, she kind of likes it, but also reminds herself it’s temporary and that you will be okay. after all, when she’s feeling overwhelmed, she doesn’t want to be approached about it. so she leaves you alone. however, there comes a point when she knows that you’re getting yourself into a deeper hole, and she just cannot let that happen to you. she’s been there before–at a low point where she’s felt trapped inside her head. minthara can confidently say that it’s a torturous experience, and it’s the last thing she wants for the one she loves. she wants you to feel safe and loved, not miserable and careless. that’s when she’ll start to consider ways to approach you about it and figure out an effective way to care for you. after much consideration, she decides that the best time to question you about your behavior is later that night after everybody has retired to their tents. you go back to your shared tent, a frustrated look plastered across your face as you enter. the first thing you notice is a few candles placed around your bedroll and minthara sitting on top with some bottles beside her. she opens her legs and pats the floor between them, motioning for you to sit in front of her. you’re puzzled for a moment but comply. if you’re being honest, you’re exhausted from how you’ve been feeling. whatever minthara has planned should be nice, right? as you sit in front of her, minthara wraps her arms around your front and squeezes your waist. she places kisses behind your neck as she slowly lifts your shirt off of you. once the top is thrown to the side, her hands come off you and you notice she slathers them in some oil. the next thing you feel is her hands squeezing your tense shoulders, rubbing her fingers into your sore muscles at a slow pace. she also places more kisses upon the spots where she feels the most tension. no words are said, just minthara giving you a sensual massage to try and make you feel better. she’s never been good with comforting words, but she will do all she can to help you otherwise. she spends the rest of the night making sure that all the anguish has left your body. this is her way of telling you that she is there for you in mind, body, and spirit. you are hers, and she will take care of you if you let her.
shadowheart
shadowheart has a lot of experience with self-destruction, but she doesn’t notice your behavior as quickly as she’d have liked. she only notices when you lead the party down a riskier path during a mission rather than taking the safe-and-sure route. she’ll question you about your decision, to which you may or may not snap back at her. no matter what, though, shadowheart will just step back and be quiet based on your response. she doesn’t exactly appreciate your attitude, but she’s been there before, so she tries her best to be understanding of your feelings. it’s not worth making either of you upset over making it a big deal. the thing is, shadowheart won’t just stand back for long. she starts to really dislike where you’re going and decides that enough is enough. she knows the signs and knows the inevitable, and if she can prevent all of the bad, she will. she’ll try to mend what’s hurting. she spares some extra heals for you during fights, ensuring that your condition is okay–that you’re not cursed or afflicted by something she can actually cure. she’ll try to make things easier for you, such as using a cantrip to light up an area that you may not be able to see as well. she’ll even try to ground you at the moment, pointing out beautiful sights during your journey that she hopes may distract you for long enough to get your mind off things. and she will ask you about what’s going on. when she gets a moment alone with you, she takes you to the side and brings it up. she holds your face in her hands and makes you look her in the eyes. “my love, what is afflicting you?” she very much wants you to spill all the details, but she knows she can’t force them out of you. she understands how much one’s secrets are sacred to them. she only hopes you trust her enough to tell her what’s wrong so that she can help. whether or not you choose to tell, shadowheart will continue her tactics. for the rest of the journey, she keeps her eyes right on you the entire time, eager to keep you out of trouble. whenever you look her way, she’ll flash you a smile and a small wave to remind you that she’s not stopping. and hopefully, later that night, when you’re both ready to slumber, you’ll allow her to hold you close and help chase those inner demons away. having your company has certainly helped her with her own struggles, and she wants to do the same for you.
karlach
the precious karlach knows you all too well and notices almost immediately when something is wrong. witnessing you snap at a neutral npc leaves her puzzled because it is just so unlike you. it is at this point that she vows to try and make things better for you before they get worse (she couldn’t stand to see it get worse, anyway). so she’ll place a hand on your shoulder when witnessing the odd behavior, waiting for you to turn around and face her. “you alright, soldier?” she asks, with those puppy dog eyes. you can see that she’s worried about you, but you just feel too far gone. you nod and smile, hiding your pain–you don’t feel like dragging her down with you, let alone risking going off on her, too. it’s better that you keep your distance, and that’s something she senses. she takes her hand off of you and backs up, paying close attention to you as you continue your journey. karlach continues to think of ways to help you, and especially ways that you’ll let her help you. every time you meet her gaze, karlach sends you loving glances despite your snapping. she just wants to show you that you are still loved despite these low points and that she is here to help you. if you stare at her long enough, she’ll even blow you a kiss. you’d be lying if you said her persistence wasn’t helping you, but you were still hurting. at some point, everybody in the party is talking about taking a short rest. you don’t want to, but you can’t stand to hear them ask about it anymore, or you’ll be snapping at them, too. thankfully, you’re not too far from a decent spot to allow some relaxation. once you get there, you notice karlach is a bit giddier than usual. your other companions take their belongings and sit themselves around a fire while karlach grabs hold of your hand and lifts it to her lips to kiss it. you’re surprised that your behavior hasn’t scared her off yet but also touched that she’s so dedicated. “let’s go for a walk,” she suggests, leading you toward a trail surrounded by trees. you have no choice but to oblige. karlach continues to hold your hand as you walk through the wooded area, being sure not to speed too far ahead of you. she turns to you every so often and smiles at you when she makes eye contact. she’s really trying to make it better. you finally stop at a spot where the trees line up in a way that allows light to pass through a single spot, highlighting the path in front of you. karlach goes ahead a bit to set up a little picnic, ushering you over. she shows you some berries that she’s managed to pick when you weren’t looking, offering to feed them to you herself. she spends the rest of the time showering you in love, not quite wanting to initiate a conversation about what’s been going on, but makes it known that she’s there regardless, whenever you’re ready to talk about it.
#lae'zel x reader#minthara x reader#minthara baenre x reader#shadowheart x reader#karlach x reader#bg3 x reader#baldur's gate x reader#baldur's gate 3 x reader#bg3 headcanons#baldur's gate 3 headcanons#lae'zel#minthara#minthara baenre#nightwarden minthara#karlach#karlach cliffgate#bg3#baldur's gate 3#lae'zel bg3#lae'zel baldur's gate 3#minthara bg3#minthara baldur's gate 3#shadowheart bg3#shadowheart baldur's gate 3#karlach bg3#karlach baldur's gate 3#my writing#asks
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My In-Depth Review of Sonic X Shadow Generations (Spoilers!)
I completed Sonic X Shadow Generations so I'm ready to talk about it! Remember, these are just my personal opinions about the game, so don't take this review as me saying that my opinion is "right." I'd hate to accidentally spoil the game for you, so all my thoughts are below the cut:
Did you mean to click "Keep Reading"? I warned you, there's gonna be spoilers here! One last chance to back out...
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❤️
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❤️
Okay here we go!
THE SHADOW PORTION
Let's start with what we've all been hyped about: the Shadow portion of Sonic X Shadow Generations. If you single out the Shadow story of this game, I think it is an absolute masterpiece! Everyone who worked on it gave it their all, and it clearly shows. I'd give it a 9.75/10.
THE GRAPHICS
The visuals of this game are STUNNING. These new models for Maria and Gerald Robotnik are perfection! I am so glad they went with the more 'cartoon' style for the human models, similar to what we saw in Sonic Unleashed. They feel like they belong in this world among these peculiar looking anthropomorphic animals, but they aren't so odd looking that they feel goofy. They found a perfect balance and I couldn't be happier with them. Speaking of character models, to see all the bosses throughout the years in this new high definition was a sight to behold! Though I do feel nostalgia for the lower-poly version of the Biolizard, it was great to see it as the creators originally envisioned. It went from this loveable (and admittedly silly-looking) salamander to a truly intimidating and disturbing looking beast. The animation is superb. The characters move so fluidly and the poses are dynamic and striking! The frame rate makes everything look and feel fast and smooth which is exactly what you'd hope for in a Sonic game. I also appreciated the variety of poses/animations even just for the different stage ranks. I found myself purposely replaying stages to get different ranks just so I could see the different animations Shadow had regarding his "performance" evaluation. That really adds to the replay value! I am a graphic designer for a living, so of course I have to gush about the design, too! The graphic elements that appear before, during, and after each stage are straight up BADASS! I love the 2D animated flame that appears along the stage name and the color scheme and sharp lines are so appropriate to Shadow, and are a very strong contrast to Sonic's graphic elements that are colorful and round in shape. These are small details that most people might not outright notice, but it really enhances the overall aesthetic of the game.
THE STORY
LOOOOORE! Sweet nectar of the gods, we were given so much more lore with this game! Even though the Shadow portion of this game was fairly short, they jam-packed a ton of information and I am forever thankful for it! If you didn't do so while playing, I highly recommend playing again and talking to the NPCs regularly for little nuggets of lore. I was initially worried that this was going to be a rehash of the same 'origin' story we've heard a dozen times already, but that was not the case! Instead of focusing entirely on the tragedy that happened on the ARK, we got to learn what life was like on the ARK while times were still good! Learning that Shadow didn't used to be confident at all, to the point where Maria basically doesn't recognize this confident version of him that we've all known him as. And that Shadow never did his homework??? HA! I loved the confirmation that yes, Maria WAS INDEED the person who gave Shadow his name, and the meaning behind it was EVERYTHING TO ME! (Also works so well for my my AU. IYKYK hehehe) Plus all the Robotnik family history?! MARIA HAD A LITTLE SISTER?!?! She'd be old now, if she's even alive, but will we ever meet her? Will Shadow ever meet her (and would he even want to, or does he feel like that chapter of his life is closed now)? What was she like, and how did Maria's death impact her and her parents??? I hope we'll find out some day! Plus getting to learn a little bit more about Gerald's sons was exciting too. Will more Robotnik family members make appearances down the line? What do they think of Eggman's misdeeds? I'm so curious for more! It was heartbreaking in the best way for Shadow to get to interact with Maria and Gerald again, especially knowing he can't do anything to change what will inevitably happen to them. His sense of desperation paired with the growing affects that Doom's powers were having on him really had me worried about what was going to happen to Shadow's state of mind and overall well-being. It was amazing to see the toll it was taking on his body and his mind. In particular, I'm thinking of the scene where Shadow goes to fight Sonic and you see him having to actually restrain himself and go easy on Sonic. I thought it a great scene to demonstrate how easy it would have been for Shadow to just give in to the rage and take Sonic out without hesitation, but his willpower was able to win in the end. I have heard some people saying they're disappointed that Shadow lost his Doom abilities by the end of the story, but I think it made complete sense for the story. Black Doom is insistent that Shadow isn't 'complete' yet and he has to be more like him in order to be 'perfect.' But that isn't true! Shadow is already the ultimate life form, especially because there's more to him than his Black Doom DNA. By rejecting Doom's influence in the end, that was Shadow's true evolution. He's perfect as he is. Obviously I could gush forever and ever about all the Shadow and Maria scenes, but words aren't going to do it justice. It was just so moving to see how different he is when he's with her. In fact, at the end of this game I believe this is the first instance we ever see a true, genuine, heartwarming smile from Shadow and it DEVASTATED ME! We are used to his smirks, but when he's trying to reassure Maria that everything's going to be okay, we get to see him truly smile and we aren't seeing Shadow the Ultimate Lifeform or Shadow the Destroyer/Weapon, we are seeing Shadow the Brother and it felt like the warm embrace of a security blanket. God bless the writing in this game.
THE ACTING
The acting in this game is incredible from a visual and auditory performance. The animators really pushed the acting of the character models and you can feel Shadow's transformations throughout the game and the toll it's taking on his body. The emotions are cranked up to the max and they didn't pull any punches. In the past, Shadow was often limited in his portrayal of emotions, but that wasn't the case in this game at all. We saw anger, we saw resentment, we saw panic and sadness, and affection. There was so much thought put into the shaking of his hands, the gritting of his teeth, the shrinking and dilating of his pupils, all to show what's going on in his head without even resorting to words. SO MUCH ATTENTION was put into how these characters moved and interacted with each other and it truly tugged at my heart strings. There were too many wonderful moments for me to break down, so I will just single out one for now and applaud the creative direction and the animators for these scenes as a whole. There's this moment right near the end of the story, when Shadow is trying to stop Gerald and Maria from disappearing for good. His gestures are wild and panicked, his pupils and irises are small due to fear, but then Maria simply frames his face and rests her forehead against his. It's subtle, but Shadow's eyes widen and then return to their regular size and everything from his stance to how his shoulders fall show what a calming presence Maria has and how she helped (and will continue to help) him find his inner piece. Those performances are going to stick with me forever! Mike Pollock as Gerald Robotnik was truly *chef's kiss* MP is such a fantastic actor with great range. Though his voice is easily recognizable, the manner in which he speaks as Gerald is so different compared to Eggman, that you couldn't mistake the two characters even just by listening. We have been so used to only hearing from the angry, driven-insane-by-grief Gerald that it was so refreshing to get to see and hear the calm, brilliant, caring genius that created The Ultimate Life Form. P.S. I'm going to be crying over hearing Gerald call Shadow "son" for the rest of my life, thank you very much. I don't care about the future crimes he commits, we got to witness Shadow's father in this game and I'm weeping. Kirk Thornton is not my favorite Shadow. That being said, he really gave it his all and I was pleasantly surprised by what he accomplished. One of the performances that surprised me the most was Mephiles! This is a credit to the writers as well as the voice actor. The sense of wild desperation in his voice as he fights to even 'exist' in this timeline was so visceral and terrifying. Sure the other villains had their "I'm the best, this world belongs to me" lines, but Mephiles' voice lines were on a completely different level to me. What a treat! Lastly, if you can, please replay the game in Japanese! Kōji Yusa's performance is STUNNING. Ooh I'm getting shivers just recalling his voice lines while you're playing through the stages. I don't mean to discredit the English voice actors, but I think this game is even better when listening in Japanese. Give it a try yourself!
THE MUSIC
This is a Sonic game we're talking about, of course the music is going to be fantastic! The score did not disappoint one bit. It was great to hear all the callbacks to songs in the past as well as new tracks that were catchy and enjoyable even after playing the stages several times. "All Hail Shadow" has always been one of my favorites, but the new instrumental version used for majority of this game was so haunting and eerie. It was a delight to my ears as well as my emotions.
THE BOSSES
I loved the chosen bosses for Shadow's story. It was great fun to revisit some of the more iconic baddies throughout Shadow's history, and even though some of the gameplay was the same, the battle would then shift and offer the player something new. However, it's actually the boss fights where I dock the game a few fractions of a point. The boss battles were far too easy to defeat, and I actually found them easier and easier as the game progressed. I beat Mephiles and Devil Doom so quickly that I didn't realize their fights were over already. One could argue this was intentional by design. After all, throughout the story Shadow is evolving more and more into the 'perfect' killing machine. It would make sense that the more Doom Abilities he acquires, the weaker these bosses would seem. Still, as a life-long gamer, I appreciate when I have to actually work to achieve the ending of a game. I would have liked more of a challenge.
OVERALL GAMEPLAY
Whether you're roaming about White Space or you're actually playing through stages, the Shadow portion of this game is an absolute blast. Even having played the Shadow the Hedgehog game (which I'm a fan of, btw), I feel like this game really gave you a better feeling of what it's like to be Shadow. I LOVED that I got to use Chaos Control way more than ever before in previous games. If you had the ability to stop time, wouldn't you take advantage of it every chance you could??? The opportunity to use Chaos (and Doom) Spear as frequently as you wanted and Chaos Control almost constantly really shows how formidable of a character Shadow is and just how different it is to play as him compared to playing as Sonic. I loved the 'free-roam' aspect of White Space compared to the 2D version in Sonic's story. Hunting for rocket parts or figuring out how to unlock collectibles was a lot of fun and let the player really explore these new Doom abilities to the fullest. I'll admit that I struggled with navigating some of the Doom abilities, but even so I still had a ton of fun. I already mentioned replay value, but before you even have to go about replaying the game, there is SO MUCH to this portion of the game! The amount of stages, challenges, collectibles within stages, FINDING the unlockables USING the collectibles you obtained from stages, even the mini challenges available AFTER you've completed the key challenges (I'm talking about the bell that's located above the challenge portal), all of it made for a ton of opportunities for play. I found myself wanting to take on every quest instead of begrudgingly going through it just because I'm a completionist.
My biggest gripe is that the game was too short. Am I greedy for wanting more? Probably, but I can't help it. The developers gave us a ton of content in the Shadow story, but I still would have loved to have a full length game of just this gameplay. I managed to complete the Shadow portion in a few hours, and that was even with me leisurely taking my time to get collectibles and get S ranks for stages before progressing through the story. I miss the days where games took much longer to complete. But hey, I'm a nostalgia-prone 33 year old, so I guess that's to be expected of me haha.
THE SONIC PORTION
Here is where Sonic X Shadow Generations loses more points for me, which is a shame because I think it's a great game overall. Admittedly, I was disappointed when I first learned that the Sonic portion of the game was just a remaster of Generations. I had really hoped we were going to receive something new to help elevate SXS Gens as an entirely new game, instead of just "Sonic Gens + Shadow DLC".
Don't get me wrong, the stages in Sonic Generations are fun to play. However, when you go from playing Shadow's story to Sonic's story, Sonic's side drastically pales in comparison in my opinion.
My other complaint is that for a remaster, they really didn't improve Sonic's portion of the game significantly (at least from what I can recall, as I haven't played the original Sonic Generations since it first came out in 2011). This was a missed opportunity to correct more of the drawbacks of the original game. However, I will admit there are some minor changes that were made that I was thankful for. Let's start with the positive before I point out some of the negatives.
THE STORY
As mentioned earlier, I acknowledge that Sonic Generations is just a remaster so it makes sense that the story didn't change much. That being said, there were some small changes that I did really appreciate and helped improve the story. One of the things that always bothered me about the original Sonic Generations was how indifferent/annoyed Sonic was regarding his friends. I mean, the story is about time being erased! His friends and home are literally getting removed from the fabric of time and Sonic seemed more inconvenienced than concerned. In more recent games, the writing has really focused on the value Sonic finds in his friendships and found family. He always has his signature cool, aloof attitude, but I think the writers in recent years have successfully showed just how much he cares about his group, whether the games were serious (Sonic Frontiers) or silly (The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog). The story wasn't drastically changed for Sonic X Shadow Generations, but some altered dialogue and blink-and-you-miss-it edits helped to cut that jackass attitude from the original and gave him more realistic reactions. Especially by having him respond when he rescues everybody this time! It never seemed right when Tails was first rescued and he's trauma dumping on Sonic about how awful the experience was and Sonic just sits there in silence haha. At least in the new version, Sonic reassures Tails that he's safe now. Also, huge kudos to whoever decided to alter that scene where Sonic is shoving Amy away by the face. I always hated that. Ship or not, you don't treat your friends like that when they're throwing you a bday party!
This is me getting nitpicky, but there were a few things I had really hoped they were going to improve, but remained untouched:
THE GRAPHICS
I was never happy with the visuals of this game outside of the stages (the visuals within the stages are great!). The colors are extremely oversaturated and the characters are way too intense and some are even off model (ex: Amy is so blindingly vivid magenta in this game instead of her signature blush pink. What the heck?!). What's worse, the cutscenes during the birthday party scenes are SO GREEN. The light bounces off the neon green landscape and reflects onto the already oversaturated characters, giving them an unappealing green glow. I get that the Sonic world is not realistic, but it felt like the scenery in these cutscenes made it look like we were watching a bunch of toys interacting on a playset instead of characters living in their world. Sure the visuals during the levels are great, but it's a real disappointment when I'm specifically not looking forward to the cutscenes in a game. I wish they would have tweaked that.
THE ANIMATION/GAMEPLAY
I have zero complaints when it comes to Act 1 (the "Classic" version) of the different stages. These look great, play great, and if you've played classic Sonic games then you can appreciate how identical the map of the level is compared to the originals. The issue for me lies in Act 2, aka Modern Sonic's gameplay. For the most part these levels are good, but there were a couple of small things that always bothered me that I was sincerely hoping they'd fix (and they did not). There are portions of Modern Sonic's gameplay that is SO. SLOW. I'm referring to when you are jumping from one Grind Rail to another, or when you are sliding under an obstacle. These animations are so bizarrely slow and make absolutely no sense when your character is running blindingly fast. I don't understand why they didn't use this opportunity to fix those animations. When you're playing the Shadow side of the story, his animations are constantly fast moving and appropriately paced. Why wouldn't they apply these physics to the Sonic side?
As a whole, the Sonic portion of Sonic X Shadow Generations is still a fun game, but I think it could have used a little more attention to help it feel more balanced compared to the Shadow portion.
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This game also has some notably fun DLC and the promise of more DLC in the future! I have my Sonic side of the story set to the Sonic Adventure Legacy skin and Sonic Jam Legacy skin and they are so CUTE! They win all the nostalgia points! I'll be honest with you, I have never been a fan of Terios' design hahaha. BUT! I love that they made a Terios skin for this game so players have the chance to play as him if you choose and we get to see how he was intended outside of the initial sketches we've all seen. (Still, y'all can keep your Terios skin. I won't touch it LOL!). And I am OVER THE MOON ECSTATIC for the upcoming Movie Shadow addition to the game! I still can't believe they got Keanu Reeves to voice lines for it! I'm sure it will be a small thing, but I am on the edge of my seat to see what that will be like.
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Overall, I'm super happy with the game as a whole and I enjoyed every minute I played of it!
If you read all of this, thank you for reading! Again, my opinion isn't fact and if you disagree with what I had to say, that's totally fair. And if you haven't played the game yourself, please go play it and see what you think for yourself!
#sonic x shadow generations#game review#my thoughts#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#sonic trash#review#spoilers#sonic x shadow generations spoilers#my rambling
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Yandere Thoma/Ayato X IsekaiedGN Reader
Warnings: Posted in comments to avoid spoilers, please read them if you wish to avoid potential triggers.
Word Count: 20k (Full Fic)
Chapter option: Part 1 ( 3 Chapters, +-6k ea)
It's disgusting, it is discomfort incarnate to have such foresight into the fate of the world and yet be bound to its own laws of destiny, especially when what you were sure was to take place is altered. You no longer have any ground of understanding except the uncanny feeling that things are not as they should be, to be so similar and yet be so changed. You knew things will end up alright, as long as you do not interfere then Inazumas political warfare will reach a peaceful end and it did. You watched, noted those ‘special’ to the world, those who have a story, a life, a reason and you took the responsibility of not getting involved and it worked. You became an npc, avoided any confrontation with those deemed ‘special’, avoided any influence in the ‘plot’, watched as a hero came, a nation saved and a people newly united. It worked. Your foresight was correct yet… things changed. With no base to rely on, how were you to know what the ‘future’ must be, how were you to know what to avoid, who to avoid and what minor choice may change a future? The hero has left, gone to Sumeru you guess, no, you know, you know the hero leaves for a new nation but so has your foresight and with that comes the change. The one day gathering supplies, one day speaking to a fellow npc to fill some sort of social need, one day being in the ‘dark’ and you've caused a spark.
“Oh Aoi, good morning to you!”
He didn't speak to you, it was directed to the npc shopkeep you were chatting with and yet it grabbed your attention. Thoma is ‘special’, Thoma is relevant and so he must be avoided and you failed.
Thoma spoke of how lovely the nights have been, of the soft whistles of sea, even to npcs Thoma was a gentleman starting conversation. He then noted how ‘unique’ your eyes are, a depth to them he's never seen before. That comment frightened you, made you rush to leave, to stop the change. Quickly you felt a hand on your shoulder,
“Please excuse my rudeness but how about we have a stroll? I know its unfair of me to ask a stranger such a thing but… you remind me of a home away from home, if you would grant me such a pleasure that is.” he ended with a chuckle. You have been so realistic up to this point, so good at avoiding ‘change’ but you have a heart and knew all too well that whatever feeling Thoma is experiencing is something important to him. You have a heart and so you accept. A single light hearted stroll became a weekly meet at the shop front, ‘coincidentally’, which became a personal relationship which became a friend. It's alright though, Thomas is a social guy, he's close with many npcs who never impacted the ‘plot’, you can be one such npc, that's fine. Change is fine.
It's not fine. Meeting with Thoma you eventually met with other ‘special’ individuals you knew by name before they even knew of your existence. It's a weird feeling to know a person before getting to meet them, all the private details, their worries, their joys and yet to remain oblivious.
“A formal greeting from the Kamisato Clan, I am glad to see Thoma has a new friend. Do treat him well, sadly I must make short of this meet.” and the man who is most likely the most influential to whatever ‘plot’ is to come of Inazuma greeted. Kamisato Ayato was amongst your top ‘DO NOT ENGAGE’ list other than the archon herself and yet somehow naive bliss and a VERY convincing plea(almost suspiciously good) from Thoma to have lunch by the beaches near the residence of the Kamisato Clan lead you right into his ‘life’. You have no ‘life’, you are meant to have no ‘life’, no value or effect and yet by each interaction with those deemed ‘special’ by the world your plans crumble.
Ayato then promptly bowed and walked out the residents gate, a body guard joining him as he started his track along the path you had just taken towards the city.
“Ah right, he has that meeting. A pity, if his schedule was more open I would have asked for him to join us.” Thoma turned to you with a quick hesitant smile, “he's really not as imposing as you may think he is. Ah well… maybe he still is but just in a different way then what the people expect. If you'd like, maybe I could let you know when my lord and I are doing something casual, if you would be comfortable with that of course. I forget just how intimidating the idea of being casual with a clan lord can be to someone who doesn't know him as well as I do.”
“Thank you for the offer Thoma but I'd like it if we just kept it the two of us. You are right, the idea is a little frightening right now.”
You knew what Thoma meant by all that, he means that Ayato is a genuine person underneath his political mask. Ayato is a brother, a friend and a man caring for those deemed under his protection and to those lucky enough to see under his mask they may be met with the unlucky fate of becoming a target to his mischievous nature.
Still, the idea of getting involved with someone so influential is nauseating even if just for something ‘casual' as Thoma has in mind. In truth you shouldn't even be here, here near the Kamisato Clan, here near someone like Thoma, here in Teyvat in the first place. You shouldn't be here.
“I see, that's expected haha.” Thoma smiled at you wildly, reaffirmed at the idea of something going on in his mind (if only knowing what said idea was was as easy as opening a character profile and reading a line directly out of his thoughts) “Well we are still here for a good time. Let me get that blanket and pillows for the beach quickly. You are going to love it!” Thoma quickly skipped into the yard of the clans walls while you waited outside and watched as the npcs you recognized patterned around the area. That one person at the commission board, you had forgotten his name by now after fulfilling Inazumas reputation months ago. There was the old lady sweeping in the yard, what did she comment on again? … … it never came to you, it was all forgetful anyway. A sudden feeling of envy hit you. They were forgetful, oh how lovely that would be to ease your nerves. To know that each day the sun rises you can follow your coded script without fear of altering the fate of the very universe by the time the sun goes down. Wow, you've messed up haha.
Thoma returned quickly as promised, a blanket and two pillows clutched under one arm as a basket was held in another but probably most heavy of all was the giant smile on his face, wrinkling his cheeks with a sense of genuine happiness. No wonder you messed up, it would be impossible to say no to him. It's all his fault and yet you felt you could never put the blame on him.
“Well, sorry to have starved you of your lunch for so long, we are nearly there and I can't wait to see your reaction.” Thoma then lead you through a short path of the surrounding forest and down towards the beach.
Perhaps your recollection of the game isn't accurate, you could have sworn a group of enemies should be nearby the beach here but all along the coast line was just gentle laps of the waves upon white sand. Thoma layed out the blanket with little worries evident on his face, he placed both pillows down then removed his shoes, each unclad foot stepping on the blanket to avoid spreading sand all over it, you promptly did the same, sitting down and placing the basket you had down next to his.
“This place is lovely at any time of the day but especially during sunset, I would have asked for you to join then but I feared it would make things inconvenient for you but still, spending the afternoon here is just lovely nonetheless.” he criss crossed his legs and then beamed at you.
“Come on then, don't keep me waiting, I'm dying to try out one of your baked goods.”
Right. One of the first things you did when you realised you were now living in the game was (panic, cry, internally scream in confusion as to how this has happened and if your world will keep on going and you aren't in it) actually to set up an identity for yourself. Running around and claiming to have come from another world and how you somehow know very personal details of select people and the future fate of the nation would lead to either your banishment or a future altered and possibly worse where peace was not founded, the resistance killed off and the entire plot of the ‘game’ thrown off. Not a good idea. Instead you tried to incorporate yourself into the ‘npc lifestyle’ as quickly as possible. You came up with a backstory that befit this world, you are a failed Sumeru scholar who has come to Inazuma to lead a new simple life outside of your failures. (In truth you stole inspiration for the backstory from some npc you think was on Sangonomiya Island.) It makes sense, people you tell won't ask you more about your past details in fear of being insensitive and Sumeru scholars are sometimes brought to Inazuma. You explained your (fake) predicament to a shop vendor who referenced you to the local baker who took you on. Now you bake goods behind the walls, don't face any customers and have a very npc-like backstory and job. You set yourself up well which was helped by all the knowledge you have of this world. Too bad you messed up all that work and are sat in front of someone ‘special’. Maybe you can salvage the situation, maybe it's not as bad as you think it is, you only have ‘maybes’ which isn't helpful since you had a ‘definitely’ to rely on before Inazumas ‘quest’ was finished by the hero.
You just smile at Thoma and reach your basket. “I made some simple bread rolls and brought some butter and jam but I also made some black sesame biscuits before leaving work. Thanks again for convincing my boss to let me off early today, things get busy there.”
“Not a problem, I don't often take days off either but I think I just needed a break today and imagined it would be a nice chance to get to know you more. How about you pass me one of your rolls in exchange for a serving of okonomiyaki? Sorry it's probably cold by now but should still be good.” He reached into his basket taking out some wooden containers as well as some cloths, likely for cleaning any spillages, and handed you one with you exchanging and giving him a roll and butter from your pack.
You both nibbled at each other's creations, the bread rolls were still slightly warm on the inside since you had baked them before leaving, which Thoma commented on how lovely it is with the butter. The okonomiyaki you took pieces out of was cold but packed with various spices and toppings which really highlighted Thomas skills.
“I just love that we can do this!” Thoma announced after his last bite. “I love getting to make and share things with friends, it's touching the combined effort put into it as well as the delicious outcome we get to enjoy. Haha, my lord and I do a similar thing but its outcome is not as enjoyable as warmed bread and butter, if anything it's concerning haha. Remember how earlier I said how he can be a little intimidating, our little cook outs are one such example. I really have to steel myself for those.” he chuckled and then leaned down on his elbows.
Once again, what he's trying to explain is something you already know of but need to act oblivious to. You have to convince yourself to be unaware and yet need to be aware enough to avoid ‘changing’ anything, this task has grown rather wearing but is essential to keep up your act.
“Oh? How could cooking together turn out so threatening? You two are close though.” He laughed
“It's because we are close that he feels he can torment me with his cooking. I swear, I'm surprised I haven't kneeled over and died yet. Worst part is he knows it's tomenting, it's the best part to him! Agh- I've had so many of my own treats I've made be ruined by whatever his plan is. Haha, it's amusing to look back on but just so daunting at the moment. When I said we could do something ‘casual’ with him I do not mean having one of these cook outs haha, I could never subject you to that.”
The nature of the conversation stayed light hearted, you both exchanging from your baskets while sharing stories or light hearted moments, you had altered your side of things a little, you spoke truth of personal events but under the filter to fit with your backstory, that way lies couldn't catch up with you or forgetting lots of little made up details. The outing was rather pressuring in concept, so much could go wrong since you are involved, but in reality it was very nice. You had kept yourself back a lot when it comes to building relationships with the people around you in fear of your influence potentially changing something important but you are still human and still have social needs but even people like your boss, coworkers and the shop vendors you chat with in passing never fit what it meant to have a friend, to have someone to sit next to and simply have a good time with.
Maybe you've been in this world for too long, you fear you may slip into making a ‘normal’ life here now that you've had a taste of what it means to ‘live’.
The sun started moving, waves became more rash upon the shore and the signs of the afternoon turning to evening became evident. You started packing up your basket and containers, lightly chatting on with Thoma about the seaside. To the side you heard footsteps and Thoma sat himself up straight to look at the oncomer.
“Oh! Done with the meeting my lord?”
Your hand slipped in fright, the container lid clattering as you tried to put it with its matching box. Shit, why is he here? Shouldn't Ayato be too busy? Isn't that one of his whole character points? Not once was ‘strolls on the beach’ mentioned in any of his character lines. You looked up and smiled at him in greeting, your face tugged up tensely and trying very hard to look at ease. You decided it would be easier to let Thoma handle him and just got back to packing your things away.
“Good evening to you too,” he chuckled softly and shifted his gloves, “the meet is done without any problems. When I got back home I wondered if you were still out here, seems I was right. I can now also fix a prominent mistake of mine.”
Even though you tried your hardest to avoid eye contact and look busy it's not like you had mountains to put away, you were left empty handed with a pair of well polished shoes in front of you, their sheen contrasted with the speaks of sand now defiling them. You took a breath in and looked up properly to meet his gaze.
“I do apologise for being so rash earlier, I would have liked a proper introduction. As you can surmise i am Ayato, Thoma has mentioned of you before and I am glad to have the honor of meeting you in person.” he smiled in greeting, no doubt he would have offered a hand or a bow if you both were at the same height but for now a smile would do.
“Right, it is truly an honour Lord Ayato. Thank you for extending your welcome to me.” you bowed slightly.
He laughed slightly, deeply amused.
“Do just call me Ayato in private like this and last I recall, yes my property is in the area but that doesn't warrant me the entire beach side. In truth I have not welcomed you at all.”
Thoma sighed slightly, “My lord please don't tease them so readily, I would like to eventually re invite them here but I can't do that if you've scared them away.”
“Of course, maybe then I can truly offer my welcome and they may join us to tea in the confines of the clan.”
Thoma sighed again at the slight continuation of Ayato's mischief. You took the opportunity of their exchange as an opening and stood up.
“Thank you for the food today Thoma and for bringing me to such a lovely place. I'll get going before it gets too late.”
“Oh, let me walk you back then.”
You shook your head in defiance, “No need, I know the way and it doesn't make sense for you to walk all the way just to have to return. Bringing me here was amazing in itself.”
You turned to Ayato and bowed again, less in respect and more so to keep away from eye contact.
“Thank you again Lord Ayato. Stay well.” and quickly you make your way off the sands of the beach and towards the trek back home into the outer city.
Thoma and Ayato stayed still, simply watching you go in silence until you were out of eyesight. It was Ayato that broke the silence.
“You are sure they do not carry any ill intent?” he said monotonously, still looking at the spot you disappeared to.
“I am sure. They are a decent person and I double checked, they don't have a past linked to any organisation. Sure they are rather anxious, I see it often, a little skittish at times and slightly paranoid but it's not at the prospect of the clan. Haha, if you've taught me anything it's to be aware of people's intentions, if anything they are trying to run away rather than to get close. I can assure you, they don't have an agenda against the clan.”
Ayato breathed out, then turned himself to properly look at Thoma, his face relieved. “If that's your judgement it must be true then.”
…
An odd moment of silence spread between the two of them on the beach, both looking out as the sky took on warmer hues of yellow and orange clashing with its deeper blues.
“You've been coming here a lot more recently and to have invited a friend here as well, has your mind been on your homeland?”
Thoma chuckled and leaned back out on the blanket, now dusted with sand and corners crinkled after the day's events, “I have. Thinking about the mountains of Mondstadt and all the memories just out there across the ocean. It's not in a sad sense, not at all, it's just that recently-,” he paused, looking away from the ocean and down to his lap, slightly gnawing on his lip in thought, “recently i've felt more… connected with myself. It's a nice feeling if not slightly concerning. I feel I'm getting to know myself better but it also just clearly shows how much I have yet to discover.” He sighed, closed his eyes and fully laid down on his back.
Ayato looked down on his friend, doing as he does best and figuring out just what was going on in his mind, his feelings, the reasons for such feelings and the potential catalysts that brought them about. He kneeled down onto the blanket beside his friend, form straight from a lifetime of practice.
“Does your new friend have anything to do with it?” he asks only to be met with silence, Ayato doesn't need an answer, he already knows it's true but just why that is so is still unknown.
“It isn't that you have fallen for them have you? I didn't think of you as one for love to occur after a reasonably short time.”
Thoma opened his eyes languidly and responded this time.
“I don't think it is love. Not yet but… i'd say i've definitely fallen for them haha, in whatever way that is i'm not sure but it feels… unbridled in nature.” he closed his eyes once more and shook his head at his own emotions. He tugged on a smile and relieved himself of his weighing thoughts, “So i'd appreciate it if you don't chase them away okay? I look forward to figuring out what's going on with both myself and with them.”
Ayato nodded wordlessly, not needing to disturb the quiet with a response.
…
“Ayato, did you notice the look in their eyes? It truly just- it just instantly made me feel like I was reliving my home town but also… not. It was familiar but also so foreign.”
“I hadn't gotten a good look at them in truth. They seemed rather determined in keeping their eyesight on anything but me.”
Thoma nodded in acknowledgement, “Makes sense. I do hope they warm up to the idea of the three of us doing something together eventually. Haha, once they've settled their nerves they are very comforting to talk with, I think you'd like them.”
Comfortable silence stretched along the two, the shades of yellow and orange in the sky deepening to reds and purples. In time Ayato stood up, no doubt with the intent of work to finish. He turned to leave before side glancing at Thoma.
“The nobushi that often occupy these beaches, you've disposed of them correct?”
“Did it just this morning to make sure the beach was safe for today as well as to clear out the threat they bring.”
Ayato sighed in annoyance.
“I still can't believe those ruffians believe they outwit us, thinking being close to the clan means they may spot our vulnerabilities.” he shook his head slightly, like the ‘danger’ the oathless samurai possessed was nothing but a pesky fly.
He then made his way back to the clan home leaving Thoma to steep in his own thoughts.
It was after this interaction that you decided to cut things down. At first you imagined Thoma to be the safest ‘special’ person to come across, given how social he is and loved by many you could become a face in the crowd while also tending to your social needs and appeasing Thoma who, and you still wonder why, wanted to get closer to you. Following the path you've taken recently, of course you were wrong, in fact Thoma should have been on that list of ‘DO NOT ENGAGE’ for the very reason you thought it was safe to: he's social. Very quickly you had realised in your time meeting with him that he would smile and wave to many walking by, one such instance was panic inducing when you noticed Yoimiya come over to greet him. Before she had fully skipped up to the both of you you had promptly dismissed yourself and ran back to the confines of your walls to avoid meeting someone so ‘special’.
This was Thomas' problem, he is the network that is connected to so many ‘characters’ that by staying by his side means undoubtedly meeting with the others. Today's incident was clearly that, you met Ayato, you were right there at the clan bordering the line of stepping into the grounds of one of the most impactful places of Inazuma and it was Thoma that had convinced you to do so. You had been too lenient on your rules recently, too selfish. You don't follow these rules you've written up for yourself because you want to but because you know it's for the better of the future and altering such a future because you can't stay inline is selfish to every being in Teyvat that could possibly be influenced by your choices.
To live means to influence your environment, to live means to leave an impression that proves your existence. You wish for nothing right now other than to ‘die’, be void of life and find comfort in that, to finally release the stress of what it means to have all this information of the world and not belong in it but you are still human, you have needs to fulfil and ‘dying’ is not one of them.
It was time to cut Thoma off, it hurt because you knew it would hurt him but it would be better this way. That night you closed your eyes to rest, determined on your new path but gut wrenching in a myriad of emotions, fear, pressure, uncertainty, sadness. You haven't slept well ever since coming to this world and that night was no different. You fell asleep cursing the ground you walk on, cursing the details that swamped your mind, cursing your very existence and the trouble it causes to both this world and yourself.
Separating yourself from Thoma was simple, firstly you changed your shopping time, no longer ‘coincidentally’ meeting with him like you had these last few weeks. Secondly, you asked your boss for more work, that way you have an excuse. You aren't a ‘bad person’ for suddenly leaving Thoma, no it’s because work has been busy and you just don't have the time. This system worked, you hadn't stumbled on him while in the city and the few times he did come to your workplace you simply told him that you were busy and needed to get back to work. This system went on for weeks and was perfect for devoiding your existence of ‘live’, which yes was depressive, you could feel yourself go mad at the amount of work you put on yourself and lack of outlet, but it worked. The extra work did help with the issue of mora as well (the value of mora being confusing ingame where how a single egg was 400 mora and yet 1 mora is represented as a single coin but you realised quickly it was just the ingame market system) which lightened the financial strain a little. You worked from early mornings to late nights, arms dead by the end of the day. In truth you know it isn't a healthy cycle, often coming home and skipping meals just to bathe and sleep, but it was necessary.
Inazumas rains soaked the land, luckily no thunder was present but the trek from the city to nearby village was still made difficult in the wet weather. Your eyes focusing and unfocusing, legs on autodrive walking you towards a particular customer of your workplace who the boss is very fond of. The old lady you were delivering to had been coming to the bakery for years but in her age can no longer make the walk to the city. Your boss found it mandatory to provide for such a loyal customer and so your weekly walk to deliver her breads was on the way.
In the rain was silence, just the sound of your wet shoes on the mud and the rhythmic clank of the wooden box you carried and its latch. The world began to blur, shapes and colours combining as the rain obscure your vision and the melody of your steps, the rain's patter and the wooden latch soothed your mind. Peaceful, a sleepwalk yet not unconscious.
Peace is never retained.
“Look, a stray lamb. Ha! The rain brings fortune indeed.” a swallowed out voice but a few steps away from you got you out of your daze. A wandering samurai, perhaps 3 all together, walked from the side of the path towards you from the river. If this had been ingame the confrontation would be nothing more but an annoyance, 4 ‘characters’ to choose from to easily snuff them out or the option to just run away until they gave up chase. In reality this confrontation means little less than a deathly denouement. Heavily armed, well trained men with seemingly no morals and a thirst for sick entertainment against a human bering no vision, a basket of bread and a fatigued body leaves little wonder as to how this will end. Panic arose at the realisation, the very human phenomenon of ‘fight or flight’ kicking in, and as a baby bird strives to the air you push off your feet, adrenaline quickly awakening your senses and urged your body to a change of direction and just as a fledgling's first flight you fall. Hard. Your mind may have awoken but your body had not caught the message, instead you lay your head in the dirt, all motive diminished, just your sad existence lay bare for a bunch of hostile mobs, stupid coding of copy paste enemies, to take your life. In all honesty this is perfect, you wish to retain as accurate to an npc life as possible? What better way than to die a meaningless death. That brought enough comfort to you to allow yourself to close your eyes (disregarding the other factors such as shock, exhaustion and most likely a concussion from the fall)
Perhaps a few of your questions will be answered now, if you die here will you reawaken into your own world? Will the months of lifetime in this fictitious game be nothing but a dream or will you truly die and merely sink into the mud as nothing more than a mistake upon this world? Neither as it seems the feeling of the rain pelting on your body ended, the sounds of swords being drawn and clashing washed away and your head, though still paining, layed on something far more welcoming than wet earth.
“Are you regaining consciousness then?” you feel hands lean your body up, a hand moving you face side to side prompting your eyes to open. They are met with the analytically eyes of Ayato still looking over your features for whatever wear and tear you may have gathered.
“To have fallen so gracefully in such a life threatening moment, truly your abilities are unmatched to any I have seen before. I am surprised you garner such mud and bruising, I had expected you to be dressed in only the most comfortable of clothing by the way you so effortlessly went to rest.” Oh for fucks sake-
You properly awaken, now relying on your own balance to stay sitting upright and Ayato moving his hands away only to have his eyes peering closer to you. You swipe at your face, lumps of mud clinging to your hand in turn. You heave a sigh just to gather yourself for a moment before speaking.
“What happened? Why would you be here if it means I'm not dead? Ah- sorry,” you jumped into accusations before even giving thanks, not suspicious in the slightest, “my head is still sore. Sorry, I must thank you for rescuing me, I would be dead if not for you.”
Ayato hummed and nodded his head. “To answer your question, I was on my way to the city before the rain started, not wanting to get wet. I waited here under this shelter until I saw you stumble right into that group of noboshira and now we are sat here. As for your apology, it's accepted, you are welcome.”
Why was he acting like this? Mischievous sure but with a slight hint of pride or cockiness in vulgar terms. Sure he's a noble but usually he adores the ‘polite lord’ act rather than ‘cocky aristocrat’. His attitude reminded you of how he interacts with those he deems ‘close’ rather than a stranger he's met only once. Yes you are close with Thoma which may influence how he sees you but surely not to the extent of you two being ‘close’ in turn.
And still you must play the fool, be gracious and oblivious like you could never tell between his mask and his true face.
“Thank you so much Lord Ayato, truly you've saved my life.”
You stand to bow, to leave but he holds your wrist at the movement.
“Do not move so hastily now, the rain is still ongoing and I would not like to see a recurrence of you laying in the mud, no matter how amusing the first time may have been. Do sit back down.”
No denying that, no matter how much you wanted to make distance between the two of you, trying to run away would only cause more problems. You sit back down on the bench, a rickety structure just outside the village with hardly enough space for two. You look to the ground at your feet, watching as rain drops just a few inches away. Ayato sighs, made clear you have no intent of starting a conversation. Perhaps his political side kicks back in, going blunt and straight to the point.
“You have been avoiding Thoma these last weeks, he's become distressed at the idea he's done something wrong.” you do not reply.
“Is it because of my involvement? I understand you may be pressured by our difference in class but both Thoma and I have made it clear that should not be a problem when in private so why is it you fear me? I have seen those intimidated by my title but your anxiety runs deeper than that. I personally don't care as much but if it distracts your relation with Thoma then I suggest it should be dealt with.”
This questioning is unnerving, it is tearing right to the point where the only truth is to reveal the true origin of your situation. That cannot happen so you reply with what you usually do, not exactly a lie but a truth wrapped along with missing context.
You fake a sigh, “My Lord I am… I am an introverted person by nature. When Thoma approached me I- I accepted his conversations not to be rude and i do genuinely enjoy being with him but i- he's a social person, I knew he was and it was uncomfortable for me to get involved but I tried it's just the moment I met with someone such as yourself, someone so… powerful I realised just how large his social circle is. I can't keep it up, being with him means being with others and I can't handle that.” it was the truth, yes you played it up a bit but hopefully it's an explanation Ayato would accept.
“So you do not consider your friendship special enough to warrant such efforts?”
“No!” you lift your head to him, for once properly looking at him, “It is, he is special, he is special beyond your understanding it's just that… I don't fit in, I don't belong by his side and meeting you and others just proves that.”
Ayato looked at you for a moment, seemingly lost in your words, perhaps not understanding the phrasing you used but he quickly morphed back into his usual laid back but self assured look.
“Was that your decision to make?” He let out a soft huff of air and looked forward to the oncoming rain. Why did he wish to avoid the rain? Given his character trailer where he casually accepts it, his skills being water based and summoning quite literal rain not to mention the casual manner his attacks have him kneeling right into it, how could he act so off put by walking along when the storm was hardly harsh, a summer spray in truth, you wouldn't have accepted going on this delivery if the weather was any worse.
“It's comforting. Something I can appreciate both from a distance and up close. Water has a tendency of being both stubborn and flexible, it moves as it wishes and chips away at that it deems in its way. When in motion it is hard to stop, when stagnate it proves hard to move.”
Ayato turned back to you, eyes alight with something more than just his blue hues, they appeared with a sheen, not from the gloss of tears but of something you couldn't exactly tell what it embodied. Without a character profile to read it actually is very hard to tell what goes on in his mind.
“Such waters remind me of you. So stubborn in some label you've put yourself under and yet so quick to wash away when it is threatened. You call such a label as being ‘introverted’ but I imagine it's something more isn't it? Perhaps it is insensitive of me to get into, from Thoma I hear you've had an unfortunate past in your time as a scholar and the depths of your reason may lay there but if you truly wish to integrate into a life in Inazuma then avoiding the people you come across, myself and especially Thoma, all under the pretext of being ‘introverted’, then you will find your burdens much heavier.”
In a very storylike fashion the rains seemed to ease, droplets turning to drizzle. Ayato stood up and readjusted his coat cuffs, “At the very least explain to Thoma your reasons, I did not exaggerate when I said he has become distraught.”
You stood in turn, head buzzing but no longer in the previous pain. You nodded to Ayato, your anxieties haven't shown any actual proof and yet you hurt someone who has shown nothing but kindness and acceptance to you, it is wrong.
“I will, you are right.”
Ayato offered his hand to you for a hand shake, both as an untold promise to explain yourself to Thoma and as a simple goodbye gesture, you shook it with a strong resolve.
“I look forward to hearing more about you in the future. Do keep yourself well and avoid potential naps in the mud, it's not the most comfortable of places.” he smiled at you with a cheeky glint of amusement before turning his back and walking to the direction of the city.
You sat back down on the bench, intent on waiting out the remaining drizzle, and leaned against its wooden pillars. It's all so conflicting, when you try to do right for this world you hurt and confuse those around you, if you try to appease the people around you you risk threatening their future. You bare a cursed mind of information, a cursed existence upon this plane, it isn't right to affect others by the curse you bare but it also isn't right to devoid someone so giving as Thoma.
You sit and contemplate until the drizzle gives way, your carry box placed by your feet filled with breads untouched by dirt and still awaiting their destination.
Ayato strolls along the path to the city, it is not his usual reasoning for taking the trip but still a reason worth doing so. Along his path all threats had been eliminated, you should arrive just fine but it wasn't that which plagued his mind, rather it was a soft sense of amusement, a sense of glee that left him softly chuckling to himself. He adjusted the cuffs of his gloves, a sign to his Shuumatsuban in hiding that they are to leave him for a moment, once the soft shuffling of unseen ninja pass he turns is view to your direction, the distance hindering the sight, he needed a moment to himself, to gather all possible elements at play to give reason to his unspoken questions.
“As expected, Thoma was right, they do hold some degree of depth.”.
The words Ayato left with you clung to your mind, in all this time interacting with ‘characters’ you haven't once seen anything alter the course of the world yet. Perhaps it's a twisted Butterfly effect and your actions have changed something you cannot see but Teyvat was still intact and no news of a newly declared war has come about (for whatever reasons your actions may potentially had started a war in the first place). Perhaps the time of paranoia can finally come to an end and you can ‘live' a little, truly live here if it means spending the rest of your life in this world. You also owe it to Thoma. You've done everything in your power to avoid him when he's done nothing less but show genuine interest in getting closer to you and with Ayato's words you can confirm that you've hurt him. In your time knowing him, truly knowing him, not as a character reading lines of script, not as a collection of pixels on a screen but as a real person with flesh and feelings, it's really made you appreciate him more than anything one could feel for a fictional character. Thoma is not fictional in this world and in this world he looked to you for a friendship, you lead him on in your weakness and now he has to face the loss because of your choices. Ayato was right, you truly don't have the right to make this decision but the least you can do is make up for your mistakes and keep your promises. Teyvat isn't going to fall apart just because you want a friend, what led you to think you could change the fate of the universe in the first place? Fate is a strong thing, it will not break so easily just because you exist. The rest of the ‘plot’ will go on as normal, the ‘hero’ is most likely still in Sumeru sorting out their issues and that ‘hero’ can go on and change Teyvats fate, you can sit still, live a normal life and they can keep the story going.
You decide the best way to apologise is to show Thoma you genuinely care and the best way to do that, (other than actually talking to him) is to do what he's already established means a lot to him, make something. Thoma loves to see the effort people put into something much more than the actual execution of it. You are hardly a master baker yet he savours what you bake like it's been done by a professional, so play to your strengths. You finish your work day, inform your boss you will no longer be taking the overtime and rest for the day. Not wanting to rush into things too quickly you wait a few days and in your spare time make a batch of miso butter cookies and a simple fresh loaf of shokupan on the day you decide to meet him. It being a weekend you were off work but that also meant Thoma wouldn't be in the city, he does his trips here only during the week when he needs specific supplies for his upkeep of the clans residence. Taking a walk to the Kamisato Clan is quite the walk but you owe it to him to get this done, he can't be the one to keep chasing after you, you need to show you want to be close as well.
You arrive midday, the walls of the clan still so daunting, and walk to the entrance where the clans guards await, noticing your presence long before you could actually stand before them.
“Good day, I am here to deliver something to Thoma.”
The guard eyes you but responds, “He's out. If you have any deliveries you can leave them here where they will be checked before entering the clan.”
Thoma isn't here? Shit. That makes this whole thing a bust.
“Do you know where he's gone or when he'll come back? I'd prefer to see him in person.”
“No. Please leave any packages here and-” the guard was cut off as the man of the house walked up to the entrance, Ayato offered a slight smile, perhaps to ease your nerves at the guard's menacing stance though that is his job, before turning to said guard.
“They are a guest and are welcome to the clan. Thank you for serving your duties but they are free to enter.”
The guard bowed and uttered a small, “Yes my lord.”
Ayato then stood to the side to allow you in, his arm outstretching the direction in welcoming.
“Ayaka and I were just having tea in the break of our schedules. Please do join us.”
Well it seems you will be meeting Ayaka (for the second time), not expected, not something you were prepared for but if you are to truly let go of your worries then meeting Ayaka should not be a problem.
You follow suit and see Ayaka sitting at the table on the outside courtyard, she smiled in greeting as you and Ayato approached.
“It is a pleasure to meet you, I am Ayaka Kamisato.” she nodded in greeting. It's a little difficult to respond to people such as Ayaka and Ayato whom are so versed in proper Inazumaian etiquette but you've been in Inazuma for long enough to have picked up some things. You bow slightly in turn, “A pleasure as well Lady Ayaka, thank you for welcoming me to your home.” You responded in a similar way when first meeting Ayato though you imagine conversing with him from now on would be a lot more relaxed after your previous meetings. Said man indicated for you to sit beside his sister which you did, form a lot less refined compared to the pair of siblings.
“Ayaka, this is the person Thoma has been talking about as of late. A new friend to the Kamisato Clan.”
“Oh! It's truly wonderful to put a face to a name. Thoma has spoken only positives about you. What brings you here?”
You look down to the wooden box in your hand, your apology gift.
“I need to speak with Thoma and give him something.”
You don't even need to look at Ayato to know that he's fully aware of what your meeting with Thoma is all about.
“I see. He's gone out for a walk at the moment but should be back soon. Anyway,” it felt like ice drawn at the blunt way she changed the topic. She quickly turned back to Ayato, more specifically the paper in her hands, with a look of true delight on her face.
“The travellers' tales of Sumeru are incredible! Such a different place but the stories they are embarking on are memorising.” her eyes had a sheen to them, not the gloss of tears but of something you couldn't exactly tell what it embodied.
“Their letter details so much, the food, the culture, the people as well as all the situations they've ended up in.” she giggles, lifting her hand to cover her joy but not truly caring about it since she was in such comfortable company which is… odd considering you just met.
Ayato looks at you with a quick strained smile, almost to say, ‘sorry she's overlooking you’ but quickly returned to paying his attention to Ayaka.
“I am not surprised they often find themself in trouble haha though it is good to know they are enjoying their time there. Do they mention when they may return to Inazuma?”
Ayaka looks slightly dejected at that, “No. They say they need to stay in Sumeru for now but will come to the next major festival if they can.” she takes a deep breath in and releases it. “I hope it's soon. I want to hear all these stories from their mouth rather than just as words on a page.”
So Ayaka also has that ‘crush’ on the traveller which was very heavily implied in the game. That must be the reason she is so relaxed and open with her emotions here.
She looked back down at the letter, a soft smile developing. “I hear Yoimiya is planning on taking a trip to Sumeru in the future, perhaps I can ask her to deliver a token from me to the traveller while she is there.”
Ayato's smile remained as always listening to his sister but the small crinkle of the wrinkles by his eyes increased slightly for but a moment before relaxing. His wrinkles… a pity the game models of the characters didn't implement small details such as those. It would have been interesting to see what small features the characters had ‘realistically’ that weren't shown. Would Jean have bags around her eyes? Would Albedos skin have a slight difference of texture than normal? Perhaps Cyno has a more defined tan or Xiangling having slight burn blisters on her hands from cooking and her vision? You've only had a closer look at Thoma and he was so much more ‘real’ than just a 2D image which was slightly unsettling at first but normal now. What interesting things to think about…
“How about you join her?”
Your fascination died instantly. What? No, Ayaka will NOT be joining Yoimiya, that's not how it goes. Ayaka will deny or something will stop her.
“Really? But what of my responsibilities? I don't even know if she'd accept me joining.” Exactly.
“Do not fret, I will have your duties covered and Yoiymiya is your friend, I think she'd appreciate getting to share the trip with you. You deserve a break as well and I see no better opportunity than this.” No, no, no, no you won't because she's not going.
Ayaka stood up, elation beaming off of her while she clutched the letter closer to her.
“Thank you brother! Oh I must ask Yoimiya right away!”
She bowed and made haste out the residence not even sparing you a glance, to her you were a nobody. Her mind was solely on making this trip. You sat in shock, in the past her forgetting about you would be amazing, proof of your ‘npcness’ but you only felt stunned. Ayaka doesn't go to Sumeru, only Yoiymiya does for her second story quest, Ayaka is not involved, Ayaka does not show up, Ayaka is not part of that plot!
“I'm glad she can have a chance to experience the world outside the residence though having to cover for her duties will prove tedious.” Ayato shook his head, then chuckled. “But I'm not opposed to it for this.”
Just how- how has your involvement changed this?! It must be your fault, it can only be your fault, the story has gone on exactly as it was shown in the game so why is this different? What could you have done to make Ayaka go?
“Hmm?” Ayato noticed your silence, “Is something the matter?”
You swallow the spit that had accumulated in your mouth and regained as much composure as possible. “Yes yes I am fine I just- I just need to go have a quick walk by myself. I will be back soon.” It's all you could say. Your mind switched to autodrive in shock and walked you away, neither mind nor eyes truly focusing on anything but your legs walking you a path you've taken many times before yet never once stepped on, into the forests behind the clan house.
Walking in the tanuki filled forest may not have been the best idea, you recall ingame how Hilichurls and Fatui mages are ‘spawned’ here yet your walk was nothing but peaceful. The sound of the stream was somewhat calming, it helped you to think logically. Just because Ayaka says she's going to go on this trip doesn't mean she actually will, something will happen that will prohibit her from going to Sumeru. She is a very important character, her absence in Inazuma may cause something terrible to happen that didn't ingame. Maybe she helps a person in need ‘canonically’ but because in this existence she leaves for Sumeru she isn't there to save said person, that person dies or many people die which could upset their families which could cause them to lose faith in the (police) which could lead to disrupt in the city which could… which could… leave blood spilt?
You stopped your rambling thoughts, eyes zoning in on the pools of blood on the moss covered stones. Whatever caused this is nothing you should get involved in, until a sound of a strangled hiss, electro energy popping and fizzing in the air, a shriek of vengeance and then… nothing. The sound came from further ahead to the right behind a large mound, you watch to see the source, feet ready to run away as the slightest threat. Footsteps sounded and around the bend came a semi dirt covered Thoma, looking ahead with a solemn expression, seemingly dazed. His chest huffed out periodic breaths of air to regain himself and latestly wiped off his brow and took out a cloth and dabbed at the specks of blood on his clothes and arms, while doing so he turned and saw you standing motionless, eyes awide and still in semi shock. Almost instantly devastation fell upon his face, his eyes sunk in immediate sadness, he just looked at you for a second, whatever his thoughts were were his own, before quickly putting the cloth away and rushed to step towards you.
“Please just- i'm just doing my duty, I don't mean-, i'm not…” the more he tried to justify himself the more he seemed to sink into his own hole.
“I know this looks bad, you are the last person I'd want to see me like this but-” he took a deep breath in, steeled himself to elaborate properly, “it's to protect the clan. Fatui spies, rogue samurai, rival clans, a lot of them come here to spy on the clan or put us at risk, i'm just doing my duty and protecting the people who protect me.” he looked at you earnestly, hoping for your understanding, hoping you don't see him as a murderer, hoping to retrain the image of an amicable person but his soft smile of a plea also held the acceptance that you may not acknowledge his reasonings, that you'd turn your back and leave.
You do understand, you do know Thoma isn't a harmless friendly face, that he can and will do what must be done for the people he cares about, it's just that… it's a little hard to easily be calmed even with that notion when the very real blood and remains of that dedication is shown spewed across the forests floor, it's not something any ‘average’ person would not react to but still, this is Thoma, he has his reasons, it was done in the name of goodwill and he's trying to explain it to you.
You take a few steps towards him and offer a hesitant smile, “I get it, I don't see you as any less than before.”
Before you even regain your senses properly you feel his arms around you, tight and secure, his hand cupping the back of your head and hiding his face in your shoulder, so desperate to have the reassurance that it's okay but still hesitant to look at you, like you may change your mind.
“Thank you… archons above I was worried I've scared you. My word, that's the last thing I'd want…” she shook his head slightly, took one last deep breath and moved back up, his hands grasping your shoulders lightly, you could see his face up close now and he finally allowed himself to look at you, his face held a smile. “I am so happy to see you!” the heavy atmosphere diminished as Thomas usual radiance shone, “Haha, what are you doing here? It's been ages, the last place I thought I'd see you was all the way here.”
“Oh yeah, I actually came to apologise about that, about being distant. It wasn't right of me to just cut you off, I'm sorry.”
He stayed silent, only looking at you, his eyes softened and nose wrinkled in his genuine expression of embrace. “Dont worry about it, I was clingy, I'm just glad to know you are here now. I'm really happy about that.” he chuckled and shifted his weight to point you back up the path to the Kamisato residence.
“Let's go catch up shall we?”
On the walk back up you explained to Thoma your ‘reason’ for avoiding him (your half lie, half truth reason), the same one you told Ayato. You are shy and get intimidated by how social he is. Thoma nodded at your explanation, expressed his apologies for not noticing your discomfort and promised from now on he'll be more aware when you are together and not encourage meeting with others you aren't comfortable with. The walk was nice, a bit strained because of the topic but after all the knots had been loosened it felt good to be relaxed with him again.
You two entered the Yashiro court again, Ayato still sat at the table reading through some papers. Thoma turned to you, “Oh sorry, meeting with Ayato was one of the things that made you uncomfortable right? We could go somewhere else to catch up?”
“No it's alright, I met with him earlier when I arrived. I told him I'd return so it would be rude not to haha.”
The noise must have alerted said man, Ayato peaked his head up and greeted the both of you with a smile as you walked towards him and sat down.
“The both of you have returned safely from your walks then, it's good to see. How was it?”
Thoma hesitantly chuckled, “Haha, came across some trouble but nothing I can't iron out. Otherwise we just had a little talk.”
Ayato nodded and hummed.
You remember your carrier box filled with the apology gifts for Thoma and opened it.
“Thoma, I made some more biscuits and bread and wanted to give them to you, to further state my apology.”
“oh? Perfect then, we can have them with tea.” Ayato must have had someone refill the teapot while you were away as Thoma poured you both cups of steamed golden liquid and refilled Ayatos. Thoma took a biscuit and devoured it in delight, did he always over exaggerate when eating the things you baked or was his reaction authentic?
“Ayato, would you like one? They really are divine.”
“No thank you. It would be wrong of me to strip you of your joy haha.”
It was odd but so welcoming to be able to have a casual conversation with the two. It seemed easy to get lost in Thomas stories, he seemed fully invested in everything he spoke of and when listening he truly captured every word. Ayato, though not as vocal as Thoma when he did speak his words were like a maze you'd have to do a small mental puzzle to understand if they were a wise response or a guileful remark coming from his teasing nature. Though harder to understand, Ayato's words were still a welcoming part of the conversation as the three of you went on to drink and share.
Ayato shuffled his papers, putting them to the side, even on his supposed break he was reading through documents, Thoma hummed, took a quick look around then returned his gaze on Ayato.
“Where is Lady Ayaka? I thought you two were having this tea break to discuss something.”
Oh wait… Ayaka…
“Yes, she received a letter from the traveller today and was eager to share it, haha she truly is fascinated with that adventurer. She's not here at the moment however, she's gone to speak with Yoimiya. She says Yoimiya will be taking a trip to Sumeru in the future and has gone to ask if she may join.”
“Oh that's wonderful!-” Thoma hesitated, “Oh but doesn't she have some important meetings lined up these coming months with the shrine? There were those exchanges that need to be made, some deliberations about the upcoming festivals… as supportive as I am about her going on a trip, it doesn't seem doable with just how much is installed for these next 3 or 4 months.”
Oh Thoma you are truly a blessing, not only are you a true friend but you reestablished that the ‘plot’ wont change. You mouth a soundless thanks to him.
Ayato hummed and tapped his quill* rhythmically on the table. “That is true but I want Ayaka to enjoy her years and not only focus herself on clan affairs, this trip is a good first opportunity to see the world outside Inazuma and with Yoiymiya as her travel partner I do not doubt they will have a good time. As for the workload-” Ayato reached over to the paper stack and shifted through them, “I was busying myself with planning and rearranging the meetings and visits she had in the time I expect her departure will be. It is more work but it will be rewarding, you'll see.”
Thoma seemed confused, it seemed from the look on his face he was doing the same as you when it comes to Ayato's words, figuring out the puzzle but if there was an underlying meaning to his words you didn't detect them, Ayato was simply stating facts and expectations yet Thomas silence ment he was looking for more than just that. Whatever mental games Thoma was tackling he must have failed, he chuckled and melted back into his relaxed self.
“I'm glad then, it will be good for her.”
No… no this isn't right. There will be something, something will stop her from going, there must be.
“mhm, I only await to hear back from her and her meet with Yoiymiya, I don't see any reason why she would decline.”
Yoiymiya will decline, she will, she must.
“oh? Are you okay?” Ayato looks at you in concern, he puts his quill* down and gives you his full attention.
“Is something the matter? Whatever it is, I am sure we can address it.”
“No, no its okay I just realised- I had some serious stuff to do for work which i've forgotten.”
Ayato's face turns to mock surprise, you know he didn't believe you but he doesn't comment on it, Thoma does the same but you can detect the small quiver of his smile in disappointment that you are leaving so soon.
“Oh dear! Do you need help getting back home?”
“no no, i'll be fine thank you” you rush to stand up and then smile down to the two. “Thank you for today but I must go. Enjoy your afternoon.” you rush pleasantries and are out the gate before the two could press you further on your actions.
You've done it again, you came here to try to fix things but you've just made a mess. You can try to fix it tomorrow, for now the more pressing thoughts of the potential Sumeru trip Ayaka will go on drowned out any other thoughts. You walk home rushed, the long walk not helping much to ease your nerves, you can only hope fate will prevail and Ayaka will stay in Inazuma.
Ayato and Thoma sat in silence as you left, mutual understanding of the odd nature of your departure yet not wanting to address it.
“So… your ‘walk’ was fruitful then?”
“Just a few stray Hilichurls and a Fatui mage but it's been sorted.”
“Thoma, you know securing the perimeter is not part of your duties, you needn't lie about the reasoning for going out.”
Thoma did not respond.
Ayato breathed in deeply, “I am not opposed to you going out to release your emotions but I worry you may get caught up in them only to further feed into your obsessions.”
“I'm not obsessed! I'm just-” he grit his teeth in his own turmoil, “I don't want to label these feelings as ‘obsession’, that wouldn't be right to them. I don't know, I still don't know. When they stopped talking to me it felt like I'd lose them forever, that everyday I don’t see them with my own eyes is a day that they may disappear and I know that sounds obsessive but… but I don't want to call it that. I just don't…”
Ayato soaked up his friend's words like a sponge and as always his responses were either clear or muddled with undertone, this time Thoma could tell instantly Ayato's words were transparent.
“You need not worry yourself about labelling your feelings then, you two are back in contact and there is still a future for you to explore what the emotions you are holding mean. Just do not lose sight of your health and those around you, even obsession can be tamed. “
The next few months were both easier and harder than the times you were avoiding Thoma. Sure, you lessened your workload and your health improved, you stayed in contact with Thoma, not as much as before but still enough to bond over. It was good to have a friend again and the feeling was mutual, every time you did meet he seemed eager to enjoy it to its fullest. You had even met with Ayato a few more times, never to the extent of Thoma but at least it became comfortable to sit and have tea with the both of them in a relaxed manner but that was the positives, the looming threat of Ayaka changing the plot was a heavy cloud always looming. The few occasions she saw you she was cordial and respectful but her interest glossed right over like you didn't even exist. She and Yoimiya made plans, fulfilled the work she could and now here you stand on the beach you woke up on exactly 2 years ago, 2 years since you randomly came to be here in Teyvat, the same day fate was changed and both Yoimiya and Ayaka were set sail for Sumeru.
In blunt terms, youve fucked up. This was pure proof of your paranoia, this was proof your existence can cause the plot to change and the realisation of just how helpless you are in this situation dawned on you. The very act of your existence, whether you interact with those deemed ‘special’ or not, can and will change the story and you can only wonder if it will end well or if you've led something to doom.
It's not fair, it's not fair at all. Even though you've been friendly with Thoma recently it's not like you can truly confide in him and he's just a painful reminder of your mistakes. The burden of wearing this responsibility, one you didn't even know how to fulfil, one you failed to fulfil, it's unfair. You are only human, you have needs to fulfil and ‘dying’ isn't one of them…
But
But is it moral to be so selfish as to care about your own being when putting the risk of others on the line? Ayaka is gone from Inazuma, just how many people was she meant to interact with if she stayed? How will her presence in Sumeru affect the story? If you guess right the ‘hero' should be done with the main quest of Sumeru if it means Yoimiyas story quest can start but what if something happens that prohibits the plot for future stories? What of Ayakas presence delays the ‘hero’, even for a minute, in which that minute was originally meant for something in the greater scheme of things?
This is awful… this isn't right. Not only has living become so difficult because of the constant nagging of anxieties and worries but you also have the potential to be responsible for disaster simply by existing.
It isn't right… it isn't right you afflict this world with your existence and the threat it brings.
Two years ago when you awoke on this beach you hoped to retain a normal life, perhaps find a way back home but at the very least, set up a life for yourself, an npc life but at least something. It's only fitting that you felt you had to come here, to kneel in the sand and watch how its granules slip through your fingers, it's because you exist that this sand is moving… it's only fitting that you finally come to the conclusion that you must die while being here. This is the place of your ‘birth’ into this world, perhaps it can be the place of your death as well. Not ‘death’, not some convoluted meaning of ‘dying' and becoming a new person, no you need to die. You need to die to ensure the people of Teyvat can remain on course. You are the virus here, you are the disease you need… you need to die.
Tears ran down your cheeks at such a resolute statement, sure youve thought about it all but now and truly you've decided that this is it, that you must do this. It's not like you want to die, not on a personal scale, but on a mental and emotional scale all this is too much, too much to bear and too much to live through.
It's not fair to leave the people you've so selfishly afflicted with your presence without giving them a reason but you are too much of a coward to tell it to their face. It wouldnt go well if you were to stand infront of Thoma and tell him you were going to kill yourself, thats for sure but at the very least he could get some form of an explanation.
You decide tonight is not the night you die, that would be tomorrow, you stand up from the ground and walk home, the weight of your choice still as raw as the moment you decide it, death is no light matter after all.
You get home, a small space a person like yourself could afford, only the basics of furniture and 2 rooms. There under your door lay a letter, you pick it up and sit at your table where unblemished paper sat to become future suicide notes. Taking a look at the letter it was sealed in wax, the crest of the Kamisato Clan dug into its mass.
You open it,
‘Dearist XXXX
May this letter find you well. Both Thoma and myself wish to invite you for a stay at the Kamisato Clan as both a guest and a friend. The changing season brings a beautiful opportunity to witness it first hand as the trees take on their new hues and the oceans change their tides, you are welcomed to join us. Thoma sends his best wishes but asks for them to properly be said in person rather than in post. We eagerly await your response.
Signed
Ayato’
Haha… how casual for a man like him… haha… haha here you are preparing to write letters announcing your death to them and yet they think only of including you in their lives. Haha… how horrible, how utterly vile it is to be able to experience emotions such as these. These feelings only prove your point more. You put the letter to the side and stared blankly at the response you are going to reply with, oh of only it were as optimistic and welcoming as theirs was.
You tried to make it easy for both yourself and those intended to read it. You state that the mistakes of your past have lay heavy on you and that death is the only relief, that you are sorry you cannot return the sentiment of friendship and must lay your mistakes to rest.
To Thoma you leave a more personal note, telling him that he made your life here in Inazuma so much better, that it was only in the moments with him you forgot your ‘mistakes’ for even a moment and for that you are grateful. It's true, it's only Thoma who made you forget the fact you don't belong here when you spend time with him. Sending this letter to him is assured to rip his heart, he sees you as a friend and he's going to beat himself at the thought that he did not help you enough to make you feel you'd want to stay, that he wasn't a good friend, which is not true at all but you know there is little you can do to convince him otherwise. In a moment of distressed induced vulnerability, with tears in your eyes you state something so cliche as that perhaps in another life you two may be able to have the friendship you both craved in this life, if only there is a case of reincarnation and you may be born in the same universe as him and live that life with no burdens or guilt of your existence.
To Ayato you are more cordial, less emotional or descriptive but you tell him that he was right on that day in the rain, that there is a deeper problem than you just being ‘introverted’, otherwise you keep it professional.
After the hardest two were done it was rather simple, it's not like you have any friends or family to write to and sending a letter to the street vendor you buy from doesnt make sense. You do write a letter and tell your boss that you simply will not be returning to work, you don't say why, and that you thank him for all the opportunities and help he has given you.
For once it was easy to fall asleep, for the first time in 2 years the moment you lay your head on your pillow you were unconscious. For once you've felt the release of the burden you feel and the comfort that will come when your plague on this world is done. You are so tired and finally you can rest.
The next day went on simply, it was a weekday and you went to work, in the afternoon you submitted your letters to the post and walked back home, taking in the scenery of Inazuma. This will be the last time you walk these streets. You wait at home quietly, have a decent meal and enjoy the sounds from outside of leaves and people. You felt in an odd state all the way through the day, like your senses were hypersensitive noticing the slightest thing around you which was lovely. You got to focus on the squirrles you passed on your way to work, the smell of baked bread smelled heavenly once again like it had the first day you were in the bakery, the pink and purple blossoms of the trees were so vibrant on your way home. You had given the shop vendor a smile and a wave as you passed her, that day you felt no burden, no grief. You only had one more step to take, the hard part was already over with.
In the late evening you stood by that beach again, the view was incredible. You sat down in the sand and got comfortable leaning against a rock and letting the tide touch the tips of your toes. You were naughty today, you bought enough substances from clinics or herb stands to be sure you felt good in your last moments. You took them quickly and then rested your head back against the rock, letting the sound of waves softly crashing, leaves rustling and the odd animal chirp lull your mind. It took some effort not to fall asleep just yet, you blinked your eyes harshly and woke yourself up a bit. This part was slightly uncomfortable, the beach you woke up on had a slight cliff, nothing you'd die by jumping off of, it was just a little steep incline but it was enough. You took a large rock from nearby and rolled it closer to the edge, tying a rope around and around your ankle. Drowning didn't seem like a peaceful death but at least like this your body can be washed into the sea where it can decay in peace without traumatising a random person strolling the beach. You relaxed and took out the large knife you had brought with you. Bleeding out decreases the time by knocking yourself out and not having enough energy to wake up in the water and struggle. You should be numb enough now. You closed your eyes and cut lengthwise, both arms, a leg… you tried your neck but even drugged up that was beyond doable. You didn't even register when you had stopped, you didn't see the blood flowing or feel the pain as it pooled, slowly your will died out as everything became hazed. It was a feeling, not a good or bad one, you couldn't even think. You felt the weight on your ankle tug, your consciousness dropping and allowing the gravity to pull you away. Black.
You woke up. You woke up. Dazed, in pain but you did. Your eyes opened lightly, luckily it wasn't very bright. Slowly your mind awoke as well, you saw the walls and crest oh so familiar of the Kamisato Clan, of its low light lanterns on the floor and dark wood trims. What were you doing here? What were you even doing?
Each of your senses woke up from the shock they were in and soon your ears picked up sound, at first the static was all you could hear until it was voices. You inclined your head to where the sound came from. Thoma and Ayato sat at a table, what they were talking about was inaudible. Why? Why were you here?
Everything slowly came back to you, what you did, why you did it and mainly the fact that you should be dead right now and yet you were here. Panic arose which was enough adrenaline to push your body and mind completely awake. You shuffled up and looked at the two. Thoma turned at the movement and instantly reached out for you, arms cradling your head which he buried his to your shoulder, a grasp seeking for comfort yet trying to give support.
“Archons above you're awake. My word… oh my word…,” he softly cried into your shoulder but picked his head up to look at you, “Why?! Why did you do that? Why did you feel…” his face was morphed into true distress, his eyes red and slightly swollen from no doubt a long time of distress but renewed with fresh tears. “Please, you are here, you are here and yet you wanted to go-” he choked, “Why, I nearly lost you.” his head fell back down to rest onto you, “I nearly lost you…”
His arms held you tightly, confirming that you were there.
Ayato finally announced himself with a soft clear of his throat, he stayed sitting at a distance.
“Thoma, they are safe and alive. We confirmed this the moment we got them here. “ he took a moment, thinking over his words. “How about you go prepare us a pot of tea and eats and we can discuss this once we all have gathered ourselves?”
Thoma lifted himself back up, “yes… yes you are right” he gave you a squeeze and a haste kiss on the crown of your head before standing and giving you a very strained smile, ‘everything is going to be okay’ it read. Quickly he turned and sped walked out as if staying in the room for too long would prohibit him from ever leaving you. Now it was just you and Ayato.
“Come sit please or do you need assistance getting up?”
You look down at your body, arms and legs patched up in bandages and feeling weak but with a struggled attempt you found you could stand up and walk to him before nearly falling into a sitting position and looking at him. He knows what's happened, he knows the aftermath and you don't.
Ayato sighed and shifted at papers on his desk, 2 in particular, the ones you had sent out.
“We got these well after we had saved you from your incident,” he looked up to you with something of a harsh look, “you can thank the fact one of my shibatsu were watching and stopped you from falling and promptly brought you here.”
He sighed, closed his eyes tense for a moment then released and folded the papers neatly. He returned his gaze back to you.
“I know, or at least suspect, what elements are at play here. The identity you have made for yourself here as an ex Sumeru scholar, that is false, correct?”
How… How did he figure that out?
“You need to speak now, for your and Thomas' betterment. No more lies, no more half trues, no more hiding because after an event such as the one you pulled yesterday I will no longer allow such threats so please, speak.”
You opened your mouth, it felt hoarse and sore. This is it. No more hiding, no more rules or running away, he can see it all, he will know, he probably does already.
“Yes.” is all you say.
An odd assortment of a smile crosses his face, not happy but at least pleased for the development, he then went back to his blunt nature.
“I will even be so bold as to say you are not here from Teyvat, correct?”
“Yes” tears built at your eyes. 2 years of work gone, 2 years of struggling to keep the truth bound, the thing you tried to die for to keep all gone.
“There are matters I do not understand, such as the truth of the reason for your attempt yesterday but what I do know is that you are not of Teyvat, that the way my sister looks at the Traveller is the exact same way Thoma looks at you, bewitched by some foreign entity.”
What?
“I know that the Traveller is not of Teyvat, they themself have stated this to both Ayaka and myself and it was a stretch at first to make the claim you were the same as them for the simple reason that Thoma fell for you as Ayaka did for the traveller but what perhaps confirmed my suspicion was when I felt that pull as well. For some reason the way my sister described her fondness for the traveller it was only you I could imagine, when I saw Thomas eyes alight in excitement at seeing you I could tell exactly what it is since I feel the same. For nearly no reason this feeling appeared.”
He cleared his throat and continued, “I didn't only come to this conclusion based on feeling, I, as I do with all those who involve themself with the members of the clan, had research done into your past. There is no record of your existence in any school of Sumeru, there is no record of anything proving of your past, no family line or even record of you arriving by boat which is all recorded by name, yours were on no such documents.”
He sighs and then relaxes his shoulders, like he is glad he's gotten the hard part over.
“Do not worry, I can assure you I see you no less as I did before and I can promise that Thoma is the same, he in fact needs to know the truth. I have not told him of my own discoveries just yet but when he gets back I hope you reveal the light of truth on everything here and the burden you decided to relieve yourself of.”
It's hard to actually listen to him, you are too busy swimming through the currents of your own thoughts to really hear what he has to say, if you had you'd have noticed just how fond he really was being, the slight curve of his forehead in concern, the way he spoke in a tone confident but also reassuring. Ayato is a man who puts his family, friends and the clan first, even in this instance he was doing that, whatever his personal feelings on the matter were they were subdued.
You look down to the table and see the fruits of your labour, sour, distasteful fruits that bore no other purpose but to make one sick on consumption: your letters. It seemed a good idea at first but now the sight of your handwriting was nauseating, you couldn't even bare properly rereading it, to see those words you meant to be comforting only being a stain and reminder to the people who had to read them of the bilious nature of your actions. Poor Thoma…
You had no words for Ayato, not out of fear or resentment but simply because it felt like you had disappointed him, the only way you could try to make this all better is to come clean about everything, he's made it clear, there is no more hiding. Now the weighting doom of changing the course of fate didn't matter, what mattered is the crestfallen frown on his face and mellow gaze, what mattered was the troubled Thoma in the other room whom grasped at you to stay so tightly even through all the torment you've lead him though. It's over, not the good kind of ‘over' like dying would have been, your life would be over and the secrets and threat you bring would have been over, no the ‘over’ you experience is the loss of hope. Its over, all the attempts and work, the secrets and efforts made to try keep this world as safe from changing as possible was all over.
Ayato let you mull in silence, he cleared his desk and closed his eyes in wait. Not long after Thoma returned, kettle in hand and cups at the ready. He seemed quiet, more collected and focused on the task of pouring tea before sitting next to you, his folded knee jutting up and down being the only show of his nerves. He took a breath, turned to you and smiled.
“I really do just want you to know I am happy you are still here, that I want to give you all the support and care I can to make sure you know you being here is just so important. I know that I don't understand everything you've gone through and that me saying all this doesn't help make it easier but-” he had to grit his teeth, his voice stirred slightly and slight beads of tears brimmed at his eyes,”but you don't have to be alone. Right now or even dealing with your past, you don't have to be alone.”
Your breathing hitched, chest lurched and fresh tears escaped, how couldn't you? You tried to cover your mouth of noises but couldn't help but curl into yourself and cry, you don't want to do this anymore, you want his support, you want to confide in him, you want to live. Thoma rubbed your back while you cried, gentle reaffirming strokes and just let you release all the build up. After regaining yourself you lifted yourself back up, swallowed the last fragments of tears and tried to secure yourself. You took some breaths and calmed down. Thoma held your shoulder, a physical display of support, you looked up and only saw Ayato watching with an unreadable expression. Right, you need to come clean. To… get it over with…
“Thoma, thank you for this, I'm sorry, I really am.” You could tell he tried to speak, to tell you it's okay or not your fault or something along those lines but he kept himself quiet and let you speak.
“I’ll… I'll come clean about it all, about everything.” This is it. “I'm not originally from Teyvat, I believe you know the Traveller and how they aren't either? Yeah I'm something like that. So no, I'm not from Sumeru or have lived here my whole life. Just woke up one day from my world into this one and… that was that. No explanation, no guide, no help…”
Ayato had no reaction, he knew, Thoma was wide eyed in shock but stayed silent, to him you shared memories of your ‘past’, to hear what you have shared with him was wrapped in falsification was… hurtful to know that what he did know of you was all a lie in his eyes but still, he remained silent and let you continue.
“I'm sorry, I am. I didn't want to lie and a lot of the stuff I did say is true. I just… I just covered it up to match my story of being from Sumeru.”
“It-It must be hard” Thoma meekly said, “to have lost everything, your home and family… I can see why things have been so hard and confusing for you.”
You nodded to his words. It is hard, it is bloody hard. All the plans you had made for your future, your loved ones and hopes… you'll never get to see them bloom, you'll never get to see the person you hoped you'd become because you had been stripped away from everything. The extra layer of knowing what world you came into and the threat you caused of course did not help lighten the load.
You've been away for 2 years and there is no hope of going back but you are here now and have to deal with the present.
“So that's basically it.”
Ayato's frown deepened, “There is more.” his words cut through the air bluntly. “There is more to the story you haven't told us, many things that don't add up-”
“Ayato please,” Thoma interrupted him, “let them say what they need and-”
“No, they said they would clear things up here and I will make sure it is so.” he moved his gaze back to you, it was penetrating into your soul nearly emotionlessly. “So I will ask, what is the truth to your ‘introvert’ label? Why distance yourself from others at random when in your position you are needing as much support as possible?”
Shit… shit shit shit, you can't even keep this? You can't even keep the fact you know this is a game secret? Whatever… he's right, you said you'd come clean.
“... I know things I really shouldn't if I was to make a life here. It may be confusing but in short the world of Teyvat is not where I was born but I know of it, I know of its people and some of its history and even select parts of its future. I was just… trying not to change the story. I was never supposed to be here, me being here goes against what's supposed to happen- I was scared I'd change something and things would go bad, that the good endings won't happen because I've done something so I tried to distance myself from it all but i've failed! I've failed and the story has changed and I don't know what's going to happen next!”
Thoma was quiet, now this was a bit too much for him to respond to but predicting the unpredictable is Ayato's strong suit, he didn't falter his questioning even at such a bizarre statement such as the one you made.
“Why? What element has changed that pushes you to believe you’ve doomed this world?”
“Ayaka left! She's not supposed to! I don't know how or why me existing changed the story but Ayaka was supposed to stay here in Inazuma and only Yoiymiya goes to Sumeru. Now its all wrong and I don't know just what else i've affected.”
Silence for a moment, Thoma still doing his best to soak in everything while Ayato shifted his gaze away from you, when he spoke he still refused to look you in the eye. “Hmm, seems your paranoia was proven right then, it is your presence that has changed the future you believe was to take place and in truth the fault is mine.” He looked back at you, “See when I heard of Ayakas excitement in the potential trip to Sumeru I thought it would be a great opportunity, not only for her to gain new experiences but also to ask you something i've had my mind on for a while.” Thoma perked at this, recognising what Ayato was referring to.
“I had hoped to ask you to extend your services to the Kamisato clan, in whatever element suited you, I assume in the kitchen though Thoma did not disagree with the idea of potentially aiding him in his duties.” What? He wanted you to join the clan? Why? Like reading your mind he answered your unspoken questions, “See I thought you being stationed here may help the issue you seemed to have about your ‘introvertness’ with Thoma as well as providing a fresh start for you to reforge your relation with him, of course this would all be a suggestion and if you didn't agree then there is no loss and you can simply continue as you were. That is why I encouraged Ayaka to go, not only for herself but to allow you some space to get used to the idea of potentially staying here.” So that's why… but still, why?!
Thoma interrupted your thoughts, a fresh wave of excitement running through him, “But it's okay now! Now you've let us know everything and sure it's a little hard for me to understand right now but things have been cleared up and everything can go back to normal! We can work on things together and you can rely on us for help so all the other stuff can just be put to the side for now.”
“I must disagree with that Thoma, things cannot go back to normal.” Both you and Thoma turned to Ayato for his explanation, “See they have brought forth an issue, if there is supposedly a prewritten fate we follow and such story has a good end, that their influence can change such story and has already proven to do so then… that is something to consider as a threat.”
“What? No, Ayato-”
“Thoma, I am not suggesting we take the route they tried, their death is not a solution but rather I suggest the best way to reduce the effect they have is to narrow the area of impact of their presence.” Thoma sat himself back down and listened, his ability to understand Ayato far surpassed your own, you only heard his words, Thoma was on the same scale as him. “Ah, so you suggest they stay here?”
Huh? No, that still doesn't solve the issue though! You are still going to change stuff, being in the clan may make it even worse!
“I'm sorry but that can't happen!” you state, you cant let them doom themselves,”I can't stay here, you've seen I change the things around me so me being here is not a solution.”
“And what do you suggest then? Death is not an answer. Wherever you go you will impact the environment around you, is it not wise to be in an area that is accustomed to handling threats and problems? To be within the vicinity and means of a place such as here with people like Ayaka and myself whom can negate such issues? That is even under the assumption you can cause damage with your existence, all we know is that you can change this supposed ‘plot’ but have you seen any actual harm come from it?”
Your silence answers him.
“Right, though it is important to be concerned and prepared. Staying here is no prison I can assure you,” his smile brightens up to a chuckle “in fact my original plan was for it to be a holiday for you. The environment is interesting to explore, there is much you can learn from the people here and most of all friends who are willing to show you support which it seems you so desperately need. To me there is no questioning it, staying here is the best course of action for you.”
You could have thought up a retort, some explanation as to why he was wrong and why going back to your ‘normal’ life was better but there is a certain air around Ayato in moments like this where doubting his reasoning is unheard of and denying them is impossible. He was right, he's always right after all.
“Are you sure? Are you sure this is all… this is all okay? Is me being here okay?”
“For further confirmation, yes it is. Thoma?”
Thoma grasped your shoulder again and leaned to your side, a great wave of support rushing from him, “I think it's an awesome plan. You don't have to worry about a thing, we’ll all have it settled for you!”
“Right, could you go make sure their room is properly prepared? I'd imagine they need some rest after all this. A proper, peaceful sleep can do wonders to soothe the soul and you will find no safer place than under my roof. “
Thoma used your shoulder for a moment to get himself back up, “I'll be back in a jiffy okay!” and made a quick pass to the backrooms.
You and Ayato watched him go in silence, when he was out of sight and out of earshot Ayato repositioned himself.
“He does not know about the foreign effect you may have on him. Once again it is only a theory to suggest that just because you and the Traveller are not of Teyvat you have some bewitching effect but there are some elements of truth to such a theory, still I think it is unwise to tell him this. To tell him his feelings are fabricated would break him…” Ayato closed his eyes and sighed, he looked tired, “And it truly would be a shame to name these-those feelings as false.”
That wouldn't be good… “Okay, I won't tell him about it. … …” you really are tired, your mind isnt working as it should anymore. The adrenaline of shock has worn down and the latent feeling of exhaustion had begun to ebb its way through your very bones, at a moment of self reflection you felt your arms so much heavier to hold, legs stiffened all while the dim pain of the wounds across your body became recognisable. A good rest is what you need…
Ayato didn't say a word after, only left you to your own musings.
“It's all set up! There are fresh towels and guest clothes if you want to bathe but otherwise it was all pretty much done!” Thoma did a slight jog to your side and offered you a hand, “You need help getting there?”
You look up at him, for a room rather dim he outshone the very sun itself. “I think I just want to rest for now, i'll bathe later.” You reach up and take his hand, do a little wobble as you reconnect with the notion of having to walk, Thoma readily supplied his elbow for you to hold onto as well as you got your balance.
“Alrighty. Just hold on and don't shy away from leaning your weight on me okay? I've got you.” you two take a few tentative steps to test it out, walking seemed doable now.
“I'll send them off to bed, i'll be back shortly my lord.”
Ayato looked back at you two and gifted a smile, “Rest well then.” you did a slight nod in return.
Even with the support of Thoma and still retaining the ability to walk the short trip down the hall seemed so much more of a struggle then it should have. Not only was your body in dull pain but your mind was simply tired, overrun and everything slowly seemed to mesh into each other. Thoma was true to his word and kept you upright, guiding you to a neatly made bed and gently easing you into the cushioning. After 2 years of a cheap bed and your most recent nap being in the sand and hardwood floor the feeling of high quality bedding was sensational, a moment of respite from feelings and thoughts.
“You all settled in?” Thomas' voice sounded muffled in your half sleep state but you registered him with a nod.
“I'm glad…”
The cushions you lay on shuffled, his weight sat nearby you. “You know you really did scare me there, when I saw- when you were brought here in the state you were I didn't know what to do, something so unlike me. I didn't know if I wanted to rush for medical care or just to slump down beside you and cover you.” He leaned down, his head lay on the mattress beside your shoulder, his one arm wrapped around you, an awkward hug of one person sitting and another laying down. “At least I can do this now, please just let me indulge in this for a little, everything is just a lot to take in still.” He sighed out his tension then shifted his head to lean slightly on yours. “I know this is wrong of me but in truth I can be rather selfish. I want to be selfish here and not only show you how much I care for you but also how much I love you which is wrong because… because I don't love you. It would be insensitive to both you and myself to label this obsessive feeling as ‘love’ and I don't want to do that… Only now, only now will I be a little selfish and join in the delusion that this is love.”
…
“but I want to make this scalding passion of deranged obsession into the soft warmth I know it can be, of genuine endearment and not just an infatuation.”
He lifted himself to finally look at you, he had tears running down his face, “So you can't go. You can't leave me until that happens. You can't leave until I can properly say I love you, okay? I'll be here every step of the way, you can lean on me, you can trust me and I'll give you my everything so please give it your all and just… keep finding the incentive to keep going.” He pursed his lips in a strained attempt of a smile, gave up on trying and instead leant back down to give the crown of your head a kiss. He got up and stood by your side. “Sleep well, I'm sure tomorrow will be the start to a beautiful new future.” He closed the door and left.
If you had been in a more stable sense of mind there was a lot you could have responded to him, the not-so love confession, the odd descriptions of desperation and just how close he got but your mind was fazed, Thoma gave you nothing but comfort as you went to bed, he hugged you and told you it will be okay and that was nice, the feeling of the linin was nice, the chance to close your eyes was nice… He left you off with a nice feeling.
“All is settled then?”
“Yep, they should have no problem falling asleep, they were practically already unconscious once we got there.”
Ayato laughed and Thoma sat back at his original position, by now Ayato had taken out some late night documents to go over while waiting.
“So, did you tell them?”
“Hmm? Which part?”
“haha, your feelings Thoma, knowing you you would have.”
Thoma on reflex scratched the back of his neck and chuckled awkwardly at being so easily caught.
“Yeah I did though with the state they were in they probably didn't hear any of it.”
“Which is why you felt you could tell them hmm?” Ayato looked up to Thoma with a knowing eye, “You are just as bad as me you know.”
“haha, have I been caught? You really can't blame me though, I learnt all my skills from you.”
“And yet at times I wonder if you are even more skilled than I when it comes to swaying one's mind.”
“yeah…” Thoma dulled off, “I'm still confused about it all. I care, that part is undoubted and all the time we spent together really means something but I just can't put my hand on all these feelings. It's not what I think love feels like, not entirely. Haaaa, all I know is that I want to be by them and I guess that will do for now until I figure it all out.” Thoma shifted his weight and got more comfortable, “What about you though? Such feelings are just disruptive to you, right?”
Ayato hummed,”Perhaps but that is nothing I can't deal with and as you can see I am dealing with it. I do hope the notion of sharing isn't distasteful to you, I know we've met a consensus about this but I want to ensure we are on the same page here. Your friendship is much too important to risk over miscommunication.”
“haha of course! Your feelings are just as valid as mine.”
“Good.” Ayato smiled fondly then returned to his papers. Thoma sighed in mock exhaustion, “That's the face you pull when you're thinking about work. Haha, I will leave you to your important papers, do not work too much and fall asleep at your desk again, okay? You don't want to be ruining your back at such a young age.”
“haha. Yes Thoma, good night.”
“Goodnight my lord, just let me know if you need anything done alright!”
“You know I will.”
Ayato shook his head at his friends teasing, it is fun when Thoma is the one responding with tauts of his own. Thoma left Ayato to his business in the slightly dimmed room.
For as much as Thoma has grown around Ayato, for being the closest person to understand him and balance the position of respectful employee and casual friend, it is still funny to Ayato how he can still be so oblivious to things. Of course his mind is not only on work, however could it be when finally you were in his home, in his care and finally he can display his… love.
Rest is crucial for recovery, on any normal day you'd let guilt swallow you for staying in bed for as long as you have this day, waking up in the late morning and simply laying in bed till afternoon, this is peak sloth behaviour but in all you deserve it, you are on ‘holiday’ you are allowed to be a little lazy here. After waking up you had gone through quite a bit of internal conflict, between failing to ‘delete’ yourself of this world, revealing everything, going through the motions and now seemingly stuck here it's all just a lot to process. There is joy brought from the relief that you no longer must carry these burdens but also disgust that you have let the situation get to the state that it is in now. Everythings changed yet at the core nothing has. When your mind tired of thinking it just wallowed in the present feelings, how lovely the bedding is, how scenic the light looks coming from the window, how lovely the atmosphere of the room is, you had been left off with such a lovely feeling last night, odd considering the nature the night took, but for some reason everything just felt so comfortable when you let your mind just dissipated and ease into the surroundings. Eventually you figured you should get up, that there was enough strength in your legs to keep you steady. You got changed into the provided clean clothes and left to find someone to ask about getting something to eat. It's rather awkward walking these halls not knowing where you are meant to be but Thoma and Ayato said you were a guest so it should be fine. You reached the main clearing where Ayato's desk sat, where you three conversed last night, and as if nothing had changed since then Ayato was sat exactly where he had been left off, his eyes scanning papers and writing or editing others, he placed his brush down as you entered.
“Good afrternoon, I hope you were able to sleep well. Shall I arrange for someone to prepare you a meal?”
It's still slightly odd to be casual with Ayato after last night but if this is how things are going to go from now on then you truly do need to get used to it.
“Yes and yes please, thank you.” you gave a slight bow, you can't help being awkward no matter how much you tell yourself otherwise.
Ayato chuckled, of course he did, he saw the world in 4D compared to you, of course he found something funny. “Then please, have a seat. Any meal requirements?”
You word off your response and Ayato relays it to a staff member he calls in. After the order was completed Ayato went back to his work while also starting the conversation, hes easily noticed a pattern when it comes to your reluctance to initiate it in your own stead.
“Now that you have some free time from work, are there any activities you'd like to try? I want you to consider your time here as a holiday and for that I will provide whatever materials you need to make that happen.”
“Oh, no. I'd just like to relax for a bit before making any plans on activities.”
“haha, I meant anything to help with that. Do let me know when you think of anything, there are very few items I cannot provide so the options are yours to demand.”
“mhm…” you nod your head but say little else. Ayato lets this slide and allows you to sit in your peace. In time a well prepared meal is brought to you, you sit to the side of the room and eat with yourself as company, as it has been for the last 2 years. 2… years… Your previous life really is just gone now, everything is gone. You don't have anything, you don't have to do anything, you don't have- no you do have some things. You have a supportive friend, Thoma, you have… Ayato perhaps? He says he will provide for you. What else do you have?
Nothing, you cant even say you have your own life to live, you cant even do that.
Quickly you swallow down both your thoughts and the least of your meal, you've brooded enough today doing it more won't help. You thank the person who takes what remains of your meal and then rejoin Ayato who, much to your surprise, has not left his spot (the surprise being sarcastic since it would shock no one to see the head of a clan swamped in governmental affairs). You walk back up to his table almost as if awaiting orders or just something to tell you what to do, where you should be just anything to help alleviate the concern of not being where you belong. Ayato let his brush lay back on the table, he closed his eyes and sighed as an indulgent smile graced his face. When he looked back up to where you so awkwardly stood he showed only adoration shortly broken as he shakes his head with a chuckle.
“This may surprise you, I know this isn't the proper setting to say this,’ he stood up and made his way to you, “but I do so enjoy being unpredictable and I can't pass up on this opportunity.” he stood right in front of you, posture poised and proper but radiating only mischief. “My dear I must confess i've come to love you.”
Huh-
You feel a hand on your cheek. “There it is, what a pretty expression.”
huh…
The hand cups around your flesh, leather to skin, chill to warmth.
“It's true. I do adore you-”
“no…”
“hmm?”
“you can't…”
“haha, really I can-”
“No. You Can't!”
You grit your teeth as you feel your hands begin to shake. He can't, he can't love you, that's too much, too much of an impact. The change, the change that could come from him LOVING you, no its too much. Your hands move to grip the arm reached to you, “you- you can't. You just- that's not how… how any, any of-” you are crying again, surprising how your body still has enough tears to shed after everything. You can't feel your legs anymore, they aren't working again, your hands are shaking, they aren't working again, you can't feel yourself breath, you are not working again. You don't register yourself fall, you only see the rise of doom again. Everything was fine, you had JUST accepted your situation but you can't accept this. This is going to change everything- it's so hard to breathe…
Ayato kneeled down with you, he held his one arm to your waist leaning you into him as his other cradled the back of your head, fingers intertwining between the strands of your hair and stroking along in a calm motion.
“I was scared of this but I felt it best to tell you now. In truth I was devastated with the events of yesterday but held on for as much as I could to secure everyone, it is only fair I am open to you as you were with us.”
no-
“The love I have for you is true and it would be my greatest honour to support you as I do with my clan, with you as a part of the clan.”
no-
“I understand your fears, whatever concerns you have of the future changing. I want you to know I am well resourced to handle them.”
You can only cry.
“It is early for me to confess but it is my sign to you that I hope for a future where we may share such a sentiment. We can grow together and face your fears together.”
why-
His hand strokes feel reassuring…
"Your tears remind me of the rain, both comforting and disturbing. How I cringe at each drop yet yearn to hear them patter against me. My dear please do remember for each storm or drizzle you bring to me I will open my arms for whichever embrace you bring."
You lean back into him, he's got you.
“To know you are here is reassurance enough, I want- I do love you.”
For as comforting as his hold is, for how easy it feels to accept his words it all feels murky. You lay in the sun-touched waters of the ocean, warm as it engulfs you in the most pleasing manner but it is sticky, it clings to you and you cannot shake the feeling of the undercurrent grasping at your ankle slowly leading you deeper into its embrace, it's easier to accept.
Ayato is right, he's always right and here he is offering you his love. You have been given the best opportunity you could ever achieve considering your situation, you have been given the freedom to finally ‘live’. With Thoma supporting you and Ayato willing to address any threat that may come you have been given a beautiful new start at a paranoid free life and not only that but to be graced as to have someone love you as well? It's amazing, you are so lucky.
“That's it my dear, I am here at your side.”
You sink into his arms, your cries can finally stop. “If we believe that tomorrow will come, we can bear a hardship today. For today, tomorrow and everyday that follows you may cry, you may hurt but you will never be alone. Alright? Do not feel pressured by my confession, I merely want to show you that you are loved.”
Ayato sighs deeply and readjusts to hold you tighter, lays his head on yours and remains quiet but the stroking of his hand never stops. The time flows by easily, your arms stop shaking, your breathing returns, you can sense your body's weight so clearly but you can feel the pillar that is Ayato keeping you up.
"Thank you." you mumble eventually
Ayato hums in question
"Thank you for everything. thank you for… loving me"
You can feel the wide smile grace Ayato, “You needn't thank me for something so natural.”
You don't clearly register the world around you while enveloped in Ayato's hold but you can hear footsteps, someone speaking, someone sitting nearby. Ayato's shoulder is cool and refreshing, the hand that holds yours at the side is cosy and tender, you are so lucky.
An explanation blurb for those who want to read some of the reasonings for how i went about this
Header done by me cause i felt like whipping up a quick pixel art
#yahooworks#genshin x gn reader#x gender neutral reader#genshin impact ayato#genshin thoma#yandere male#genshin x reader#yandere thoma x reader#yandere ayato x reader#yandere ayato#yandere thoma#genshin x female reader#genshin x male reader
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⋘WELCOME TO⋙
Caine's Wacky House, or also TADC : CWH, is an horror related AU
➤ STORY
The story is revolving around Pomni, trying to survive adventure what was designed for her, 'The haunted house' or how to Caine loves to call it 'Caine's Wacky House'. After finishing set up for that adventure, virus in code appeared, spreading on whole cast and NPCs in W.H.
Everyone just trying to survive, while Pomni is trying to find a way to cure them all. But how far she can go?
➤ Height Chart
Before 'The Virus'
After 'The Virus'
➤ Intro Cards
➤ Boundaries/Info
➺[Are you a RP blog?] ╰ I wouldn't call myself necessary a ''RP blog''. It's not my main thing, but I am not against it. If you wanna ask something characters, you can and they will answer you.
➺ [Can we create fan-work (fanarts, fanfics ect.?)] ╰ OF COURSE! Fan-works are always welcome and it always makes my heart melt. Just please credit me or tag me.
➺ [Is NSFW allowed?] ╰ Yes. I have no problem with NSFW content as long as it's marked properly
➺ [Is shipping other characters then canon or self-inserts allowed?] ╰ Yes. Go wild. As long as it's not something inappropriate or illegal I have no problems. Just keep in mind, that AU canon ships are only Pomni x Ragatha, Zooble x Gangle and Jax x Caine
#caine's wacky house au#cwh au#the amazing digital circus#the amazing digital circus au#tadc#tadc au#horror au#pomni#tadc pomni#ragatha#tadc ragatha#gummigoo#tadc gummigoo#jax#tadc jax#gangle#tadc gangle#zooble#tadc zooble#kinger#tadc kinger#caine#tadc caine#au#infection au
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guys, guys.
be honest with me. would anybody be willing to read any SVSSS x reader stuff (or, just SVSSS with reader fanfics in general?) like please i'm being so deadass right now. i am very willing to write, it's just that i have no clue if anyone would want to read that???
i know that the people in this fandom don't necessarily have any x or & readers, but i'm sad and pathetic and have a weird emotional attachment to the characters. like hear me out guys.
i present to you all a few ideas i have:
1. reader transmigrates into SVSSS and decides, fuck it, let's become a counselor/therapist/emotional support service pal. half of the conflicts in the novel would've been prevented if therapy, communication, and simple observation existed! mu qingfan, give me a chance!! i promise this will lower the qi deviation rates by at least 50%.
liu qingge? alright, let's work on learning identifying your feelings better and not respond via violence to every situation. shen jiu? hey, hey, it's okay to be vulnerable! no- please don't go self projecting yourself onto an innocent 14 year old. luo binghe? *pulls out 5 different documents* heavens, where do we even start? like, gods forbid any of them have a proper support system, or at least be able to express their feelings and deal with them in a healthy manner!
2. liu qingge x reader where he gradually stops painfully pining and gets the love that he deserves. he gets his pretty face cupped gently and kisses all over it. that's it. that's the fic idea.
3. bingge, the original luo binghe, gets sent back in time.. all the way back to right when his mother died. he believes that he's been given a chance to re-enact his revenge, play it smart all the way from the start and have an upper hand now that he has to relive this! however, that quickly changes when this random fucking person (aka, reader) just wont stop bothering him?? what the hell do they want??? (for this one, i'm not sure if reader should be a transmigrator who believes they're in SVSSS instead of PIDW and is unaware of the whole bingge thing, or just some npc that proves him wrong about kindness).
4. SVSSS hater (or someone who just has a very complicated relationship with it!) reader transmigrates into it after tweeting "stupid author, stupid novels". they then proceed to accidentally collect two husbands they were so actively against before. ugh! now that i'm here, i guess i'll try to help out with their relationship and give my advice so that they won't have so much conflict, ones that were super frustrating to even hear about!! shen qingqiu, that dense ass guy and unhealthily codependent luo binghe! wait, what? what do you mean they both want me to be part of their marriage now??
sincerely, very much inspired by this tweet (reader most likely isn't going to be an anti, though);
low-key might combine the first and fourth fanfic idea? will make reader gender neutral (or even male!) though. but overall idk. idk if people will even wanna see that at all, man. ok please give thoughts. or not lol
(10-11-23 edit: i'm currently writing the bingge one rn!)
#pls guys jus think abt it..#can you guys believe that i created a tumblr account just to say this#excuse the shameless amount of tags yall#svsss#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#shen jiu#shen yuan#bingqiu#liu qingge#scumbag self saving system#the scum villain's self saving system#gender neutral reader#male reader
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Hello, hope you’re doing well!
Is it ok if you do romance with an NPC? Basically the Scovillia Headmaster with a Reader who used to go to school with him. The Reader used to be a pretty wild student but as they grew up, they became decently calmer read: sorta..
And then they meet each other again when the reader goes to work at Scovillia!
Headcannons or a story is fine, whichever you prefer, thanks you very much in advance!
☁️Scovillia Headmaster x Professor Gn!Reader
*So before we begin, since the Scovillia Headmaster doesn't have a canon name, I don't think he does, though correct me if I'm wrong, I'm gonna call him Spicey Buffalo Cookie.*
------------------------------------------------------------
The academy halls of the ever hot Scovillia leave you feeling nostalgic. You used to walk these halls as a student, right alongside your best friends, but now you walk them as a teacher. Not much has changed about them either; still adorned with hues of red, orange, and black.
You make your way to the courtyard and sit down on a bench. You breathe in, and the smell of burning wood fills your senses. It's a nice scent. Calming and familiar. "Welcome back, (Y/n) Cookie."
You jump a little, startled by the gruff voice. Looking behind you, you see the headmaster himself walking over to you. He takes a seat beside you, and the two of you sit in silence for a little. "It's been a while since we've seen one another, no?"
"It certainly has. Three, no, four years?"
"Six years, actually." You pause, hardly believing it's been that long since you've seen your dear old friend.
"I'm so sorry."
"What ever for?" The headmaster looks over at you in surprise. You have your head hanging low as you look at the cobbled path below.
"We were so close during our time here as students. We laughed and cried together, fought, and made up; it seemed like nothing could pull us apart. After graduating, though, we hardly spoke to each other until we just stopped altogether. I feel, have felt, guilty about it." You feel a few tears fall from your eyes. Reminiscing about your time together really makes you sappy.
A warm hand is placed on your cheek, tilting your head to the side. The headmaster and yourself have gotten closer, you note, as he wipes away your tears. "Don't fret over the past, as the blame is not entirely on you. We both were so wrapped up in our own lives that we let the bond that held us together fade. I regret such a thing dearly."
"As do I." The two of you sit in silence, basking in the others presence.
"(Y/n) Cookie, there is something I must confess." Your focus is now only on him. "I have regretted not telling you sooner, but I....I am in love with you." Your eyes widen, and your jaw drops. "Back then, you were a wild spitfire. Always running around, causing chaos wherever you went. You stole my heart the first time I saw you deck another student who was bullying a junior." He chuckles as he remembers that moment.
"As we grew, I tried to keep an eye on you, worried how your fighting spirit would guide you. I am glad to know that, while still wild at times, you've become calmer. It is a different side of you that has made me fall in love with you all over again." Removing his hand from you, he reaches up to his helmet and pulls it off. Underneath the headgear is a cookie whose hair seems to be made of flames and eyes of amber. His red horns shine brightly underneath the sun.
He looks back over at you with baited breath, hoping he hears you return his affection.
And you do.
Grabbing his hands, you gently squeeze them. "Oh, Buffalo Cookie, I'm so happy you feel the same." Your words send a wave of relief and love all throughout him. "I admit, I've also been in love with you since we fist met. You radiated such a fiery passion, how could I not fall for you. You've always had my back and were always the one I needed to calm down. I've loved you since then and still do."
His heart feels as if though it's doing back flips. He laughs and picks you up with his strong arms, spinning you around. You join in on his contagious laughter. Setting you down, he looks at you with love in his eyes. The two of you share a single look before meeting the other for a sweet kiss. For a moment, it feels as if though the two of you are the only ones I'm the world, though that's proven incorrect by the sound of cheering.
Pulling apart the two of you, see a bunch of Scovillia students cheering at the doors to the courtyard and above in the open corridors. Front and center is Capsaicin Cookie cheering loudly. "Alright! Way to go, Headmaster and Professor!" The two for you look at each other before bursting out laughing. He picks his helmet up and puts it back on before taking your hand and walking back to he school.
"Seems like the others were just waiting for us to confess. Do you think they had a bet going?"
"I wouldn't be surprised, hun, not at all."
"Haha, you might be right, my dear."
#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#crk#crk x reader#crk x you#scovillia headmaster#scovillia headmaster x reader
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I am feral over gaurdians and ghosts.
I want more interactions between them I wanna see how they interact physically with each other.
Like this whole scene with glint and crow, I want more! Glint telling crow how they are partners and how much he cares, Crow holding out his hand, and Glint just going to crows hand and settling into it so softly and affectionately, looking up at crow telling him never to leave him because they are partners and he doesn't want them to be appart. (I'm totally normal about this)
Final shape really gave some amazing ghost/gaurdian dynamics and how a lot of the healthier relationships between them are.
Like hot damn I was eating good with this dlc. I wish they animated more gaurdian ghost interactions over all bc there is some good stuff in the lore entries.
I want to see more/read more interactions though. like we know they can be super expressive with their limited features and I don't think bungie uses it enough when using them outside of major cut scenes.
Like give me ghosts that bonk their gauridan with their body bc they don't have hands to hit with to they have to body check the gauridan when they are being stupid.
Give me ghosts who have a very tactile gauridan who, just when idle or doing something, just hold their core in their hand and rub their thumb over it bc its a nice texture. Ala adhd fidget toy.
Tell me how ghosts and gaurdians physically comfort each other.
Give me soft domestic moments of ghosts and their gaurdians, a ghost cheering up their gaurdian with a stupid pre-collapse song they found some where when they are having a bad day.
Finding a spot to be close to their gauridan who has absolutely passed out, from doing X thing.
Give me ghosts that hang out in their hunters' hoods and on their Titans' shoulders.
I lOVE GHOSTS
Even you immaru
I also love the players ghost, that little man has made me feel emotional reading his lore entries, he says shit, I just wanna hug him and hold him close and never let go.
I am totally normal about ghosts and not sad they don't float over their gauridans shoulders in the tower and aren't over the npcs shoulders or fly around in the tower anymore.
They are just small and love their big dumb idiot humans. Weeping.
I'm totally not sad that most of the ghost and gaurdian player cut scene interactions fun dialog in missions are locked in seasonal or old content.
#destiny ghost#ghost#destiny2#destiny gaurdians#Destiny#ramblings of a ghost obsessed hunter#weeping everyday over those little robots im not ok#gt community#final shape
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WOAH CAN I REQUEST LILIA X AN NPC THAT HE GROWS ATTRACTED TO (romantic) AND THOUGHT SOME USE OF MAGIC THEY GET TO HIS WORLD?! AND THEY GET TOGETHER? PLEASE
Lilia Vanrouge x NPC! Reader
thank you for the request, I hope you like it <3
Lilia Vanrouge is an old fae who has seen many things in his long life. He has fought in wars, ruled lands, and babysat a dragon prince. Yet nothing could have prepared him for the strange obsession that takes over him the moment he picks up a copy of the hottest new game in Twisted Wonderland: "Kingdoms & Chaos: Celestial Knight's Quest."
It starts innocently enough. A little late-night entertainment to pass the time while Silver is napping (read: fainted from exhaustion), Malleus is out being mysterious, and Sebek is… well, Sebek-ing somewhere.
But then you appear.
As the Commander of the Celestial Knights—an NPC of all things—you steal Lilia’s heart without even trying. Not only are you charming and competent, but you also manage to dish out some fantastic one-liners as you lead the virtual army across the battlefield with a grace that’s almost unmatched.
"Ah, what a lovely evening," Lilia hums, as the glow of his screen reflects off his ever-youthful face. “So peaceful, so quiet… Oh look, an army of marauding orcs attacking the village!” he says gleefully, mashing buttons with expert skill.
Then you arrive on the screen. Your character, standing tall, sword drawn, voice commanding: “We shall protect this land at all costs!”
Lilia gasps softly. He’s heard you say this line a dozen times, but for some reason, tonight it hits different. You’re so determined… so strong… and that armor—why, it looks splendid on you!
“How intriguing” he muses to himself with a teasing grin. “If only you were real, darling Commander. I’d have such fun seeing how well you could lead in the real world… Imagine, conquering lands by my side…”
Suddenly, an idea forms in Lilia’s mischievous brain.
Never one to back down from a challenge (even if it’s entirely self-imposed and objectively absurd), Lilia decides to play around with some light magical experimentation. After all, what could possibly go wrong with trying to summon a fictional character into reality?
"Just a harmless spell," Lilia assures himself as he draws up a complicated sigil on the floor of his room. He’s chanting in ancient fae tongue, eyes gleaming with excitement.
For a brief moment, nothing happens.
Lilia huffs. “How disappointing… Perhaps I’ve—"
POOF!
Before him stands… you. Armor and all.
You blink in confusion. One moment, you were standing on the battleground, barking orders at your troops in a rather intense cutscene. The next moment, you find yourself standing in what appears to be someone’s bedroom, staring at a very smug-looking man with fangs.
“Where am I? What is this place?!” You exclaim, grabbing for your sword instinctively.
Lilia claps his hands together, delight shining in his eyes. “Welcome to my world, darling! Oh, I knew that spell would work eventually. You’re even more dazzling in person!”
You gape at him. “What… how did I—what kind of magic is this?!”
“Oh, just a little something I whipped up,” he says nonchalantly. “It’s all very simple, really. Though, now that you’re here, I suppose I should give you a tour of the place! Maybe a drink? A lovely stroll under the moonlight?”
You eye him suspiciously. “You… summoned me? But I’m just a—”
“NPC?” Lilia interrupts with a smirk. “Not anymore! You’re free to do as you wish here. Consider yourself the main character now, hm?”
You lower your sword slightly, starting to process what just happened. This man is utterly insane…
And yet, there’s something oddly intriguing about his carefree attitude. And he’s undeniably… attractive?
Adjusting to life outside of a game isn’t easy. For one thing, you have to deal with all these strange, non-player characters called “people,” who seem to have minds of their own. You no longer have the comfort of pre-determined dialogue options either, which is quite jarring.
The most bizarre thing, though, is that Lilia keeps flirting with you.
At first, you try to ignore it, chalking it up to the fact that he’s just messing with you. But it’s hard to ignore when he leans in close to you with a teasing smile every time you so much as yawn.
“Tired, Commander?” Lilia whispers in your ear one evening, his breath tickling your skin. “You should rest… After all, we wouldn’t want you collapsing in battle.”
Your cheeks flush red as you stammer out a response. “I-I’m not tired! And there’s no battle! This isn’t the game!”
He chuckles, clearly enjoying how flustered you’ve become. “But of course! How silly of me. Though, you should know… you’ve already won this battle.”
“What battle?!”
“The battle for my heart,” Lilia says smoothly, winking at you.
Your face burns hotter, and you try to hide behind a pillow. “What kind of nonsense are you even talking about?!”
Lilia just grins and pats your head fondly. “You’ll understand soon enough, my dear Commander.”
Days turn into weeks, and while you initially found Lilia’s antics annoying, you start to realize that he genuinely cares for you. He’s always looking out for you, guiding you through this strange new world with a patience you never expected from someone so chaotic.
One night, while you’re sitting outside under the stars, you find yourself staring at him longer than usual. He’s so carefree and confident, yet there’s a softness to him when he talks to you.
And that’s when it hits you.
*Oh no… I’m falling for him.*
Lilia notices your staring and smirks. “What’s this? Are you finally seeing my charm, darling Commander?”
You groan and cover your face. “Why must you always be so insufferably smug?”
“I can’t help it if I’m irresistible,” Lilia teases, leaning in closer. “Tell me, do I make your heart race?”
You try to deny it, but you know it’s true. Your heart is racing, and it’s all because of him.
Finally, after a long pause, you sigh in defeat. “Alright, fine… maybe you do make my heart race a little.”
Lilia’s eyes widen slightly in surprise before a genuine smile crosses his lips. “Is that so? Well then, I suppose I should reward you for your honesty.”
Before you can respond, Lilia leans in and presses his lips to yours in a soft, sweet kiss. It’s nothing grand or dramatic—just simple and sincere.
When he pulls away, you’re left breathless, your heart pounding in your chest.
“Well,” you mumble, still dazed. “I suppose this means I’ve won.”
Lilia chuckles softly, his forehead resting against yours. “Perhaps… But you’re not the only one who’s victorious tonight, darling.”
Masterlist
#twst x reader#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#twst#lilia x reader#lilia#lilia vanrouge#lilia vanrouge x reader
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Is it possible to do head cannons for digital circus characters with a reader who's too nice for their own good
Like they get in danger when trying to talk to the bad guy npc thinking that they could persuade them to the good side
TADC cast x reader whos too nice!
Anon I'm so so sorry that it took me so long to get to this <\3! I gotta admit I've been in like, a bit of a burn out recently and I'm still recovering from my baking spree last week so I'm WOOOooOoooooO
That said I hope you enjoy!
Written ambiguously, if you want to see this as romantic or platonic, is totally up to you!
CAINE:
Literally puts a pause on the IHA when he sees you being dragged away by the big bad guy, all while still trying to insist that the NPC with no chance to gain sentience can be good.. caine finds it endearing in it's own way, its sweet, you see the best in people... and non-people... but reader, this is exactly how you get hurt..! Keeps a close eye on you during IHA
POMNI:
While I dont think pomni fits the "too nice for her own good" vibe, I feel that shes... what word am i looking for? Submissive? She kind of just goes with what others are doing; asides from her initial freak out we dont see much pushback from her in the pilot, though that could be thanks to shock... perhaps shes still feeling it during IHAs given how random and intense they can be..? Point is I think pomni would give a meek resistance before scurrying off after you, trying to save you from the clutches of the baddie
RAGATHA:
Shes loves you so much, dont get her wrong. She loves that you're so sweet to everyone, even to those who dont deserve it. Actually if anything, Ragatha is also a little too sweet for her own good.. but shes not as trusting and naive as you are. Frantically pulls you away to the side when you try to make your way to the days villain, gently scolding you and asking what you were thinking. She doesnt mean to make you feel bad, but she doesn't want to see you hurt!
JAX:
One of the only two characters that might get a little mean with you. Not like "mean as in berating you for being so naive" more so "I'm upset that you seemingly have no regard for your safety, I care about you and I cant see you continue to throw yourself into danger" way that can come off as mean, since jax isnt really.. the best as saying this softly.. immediately cuts through any "what ifs" you might bring up to him, you're the only person in this circus that he actually enjoys and hes not going to let you get flung around.. can his tone be softer? Sure, but can you blame him if this is a regular occurrence?
KINGER:
This poor man nearly has a heart attack when he sees you about to be absolutely demolished (but not really thanks to the digital world), probably ends in him getting hurt too.. but that would be mean.. but also can you imagine the angst? The guilt? He probably pushes through the pain to get to you and hes just. Feverishly pulling you to him and patting you down to make sure you're okay... he won't tell you to stop being so nice; in fact I dont think the thought crosses his mind ever.. but he does ask to never do that again, the getting into danger thing
ZOOBLE:
The other character that might get a little mean when confronting you about it, but given zoobles general attitude as well as their tone of voice, it seems like they're more angry with you than they actually are. They think you're too nice for your own good, truly. While the others may find it sweet and endearing, they're constantly thinking about how one day you'll be in over your head and wont have a way out. This might actually result in an argument, thanks to zoobles tone and way of going about things.. but you guys eventually communicate and make up, at least I would like to think so
GANGLE:
Very similar to pomni in the regard that she doesnt have the spine (haha) to tell you not to do whatever you're planning on doing. "I don't think... oh.. oh wait, reader-" as she scurries after you so you dont get lost. Gets legitimately sad and beats herself up if you get hurt. Similar to zoobles, you guys are going to need to communicate and work together on this because gangle cannot handle the fact that you're constantly getting hurt thanks to your kindness grating on her mind all day every day
#tadc x reader#the amazing digital circus x reader#digital circus x reader#caine x reader#pomni x reader#ragatha x reader#jax x reader#kinger x reader#zooble x reader#gangle x reader
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