#me answering this while talking to you lmao
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across stardust - one (j.yh)
summary: you and yunho have worked together for years, idol and makeup artist, but until today you've never touched him skin to skin. when the world tilts on its head from just a brush of his cheek, you realize he's so much more than a crush, he's your soulmate. one | two | three | four
note: please enjoy this truly self indulgent romance. will be four parts total, and i'll post each as soon as they are ready to go. happy comeback week, and i hope everyone enjoys this 💖
tags/warnings: idol!yunho, makeup artist!reader, fem!reader, soulmates au, soulmate identifying marks, soulmate tattoos, tattoed!reader, a lot of fluff and tenderness, love at first touch, shared feelings/emotions/physical sensations, anxiety/stress over what to do, reader's family isn't the best, kq is not the best company for the purposes of this fic!, light smut including - heavy makeouts/grinding, hand kink, size kink, phone sex, sexting, fingering, jacking off, dirty talk, praise, use of good girl, use of pet names like baby/jagiya/sweetheart. basically this fic is an excuse for me to write star-crossed desperate love so i would say it's the literal opposite of a slow burn lmao
pairings: yunho x reader
genre: fantasy, romance, smut || soulmates au
word count: 17.9k
It’s eleven in the morning when your day starts, hiding in the green room of a concert venue in Berlin, and the day feels lost already. With Eunji and Dahan ill that only leaves you and Iseul to handle makeup for all eight members and with how exhausted you are from yet another night of little sleep, you don’t know how you’ll be able to keep up. You’re trying to stay awake, but while the members are all out on stage learning their marks and rehearsing the improvisational moments for this tour stop, the green room is quiet and you keep nodding off.
“Bad night?” Iseul’s voice startles you out of one of your dips into sleep and your body jerks up right.
“Fuck,” You breathe, “hey,”
“Here,” She pushes a bright can into your hands, an energy drink, “you need this.”
“I need to be sedated,” You grumble, taking it from her, “the time difference is never this hard,”
“Mm,” She shrugs, “it’s unpredictable,”
“Yeah,” You sigh, “I guess.”
The thumping music outside as they run through another track is starting to give you a migraine. You take a long sip of the drink and then leave the can on the table in front of you, choosing instead to hide your face in the sleeves of your sweatshirt and let out another long sigh.
“Girl,” Iseul nudges you, “you look like shit. Your station looks like shit.”
“Thank you?”
“In thirty minutes we’re going to be busier than we’ve been since that Inkigayo stage for Answer,” She points out and you grimace at the reference. Back then it really was just a skeleton staff and one of the makeup artists quit on the spot, too stressed to continue the work and walking out in the middle of doing Yeosang’s foundation.
What a mess those old days used to be. Nostalgia sometimes makes you forget how late those nights were and just how impossibly tired you had been. This feels too reminiscent of that for sure.
Iseul taps your shoulder to get you to lift your face as she continues, “I know you’re tired, but I can’t do this shit on my own. I need you.”
“Okay,” You breathe, scrubbing your hands over your face to jolt yourself awake as best you can, “you’re right, I’m sorry,”
“Don’t be sorry,” She gives you a sympathetic smile, “I get it.”
This tiredness feels different though, so deeply ingrained in your body. Something’s been keeping your adrenaline running like a long, drawn out anxiety attack and you can’t understand it. You’ve been on tour before, you’ve been on planes, you’ve had long days, and you’ve worked with this exact group for years. There’s nothing on paper that should be making you so anxious, but the threads of it are humming in the deep back of your brain even now.
“Come on,” Iseul prompts again, pulling you to your feet, “let’s get you in gear.”
“Right,” You take another long sip of your energy drink and pray it starts kicking in soon and that the effects won’t make you feel crazier, “let’s do this.”
She helps you put your station together with ease and then pull yourself together. Within those precious thirty minutes of calm before the storm you’ve downed two cans of pure caffeine, assembled your station and strapped on your brush belt, and tried to make yourself some form of presentable by slicking your hair back into a smooth knot and adding a coat of lip balm.
As always, the boys have used the ladder game to determine hair and makeup order which means those at the bottom of the list have more time to relax fresh-faced on the couches before getting poked and prodded and wrapped up like presents for thousands of screaming fans. With only you and Iseul available it’s about to be a race against the clock to get them ready.
Their managers hustle them from the stage to the back rooms where the rest of the staff waits, and the members gather around you and Iseul and your makeshift makeup stations.
“Alright,” Iseul says as the members quiet down, “we’re down some staff as you know,”
They nod attentively and you trade a close lipped smile with Hongjoong.
“We’re just going to do the best we can as quickly as we can,” She explains, looking down at their names on a slip of paper, “Wooyoung, Yeosang, Jongho, San,” she recites, “you’re with me in that order.”
You run through the names on your slip, “Hongjoong, Seonghwa, Mingi, Yunho, that leaves you with me.”
Iseul nods as you finish your words, “Please be ready to slot in when the person in front of you is finished, and then you can go directly to wardrobe for your soundcheck outfits,”
“We’ve got it,” Hongjoong nods, “and if there’s anything you both need,”
“We’ll be fine,” Iseul assures him, “but it’s definitely going to be cutting it close,”
“We should get started,” You cut in, “if you’re ready?”
Hongjoong jumps to your chair immediately and Wooyoung steps to Iseul’s, and before you know it you’re off.
The room is alight with activity while you both work, only you don’t have a relaxed pace and only two members to perfect. You’re used to working with Wooyoung and Seonghwa, they’ve been your assigned members for as long as you’ve worked with Ateez, but when staff shortages or timing gets tight, it can be a bit of a free for all.
You stay focused and execute each member’s makeup like a well rehearsed dance, and you do your best to ignore the buzzing anxiety in your veins. For a little while, you handle it like a professional.
When Yunho finally settles into your chair, about a single second after Mingi leaves it, the exhaustion careens back into you sideways. It takes you a minute to prep your tools this time, and you’re pretty sure that without the artificial pick me up of the energy drinks you’d be passing out on the spot.
You steady your hands against the vanity in front of you and take a deep breath, and when you look up you catch Yunho’s eyes in the mirror, a tiny crease of concern between his brows.
“You okay?” He checks.
You give him a smile, albeit a tired one, “The jet lag is really hitting this time,” you explain, “but I’m fine,”
He looks sympathetic immediately, “Same for me, I feel like I’m barely sleeping,”
“That’s not good,” You tell him as you prep your stainless steel palette, “you have a long night ahead,”
“I’ll sleep tonight,” He says, “I’m sure,”
“After dancing for three hours I’d hope so,” You smile and pick up your first set of tools before turning towards him.
“Do you have anything you could take?” He asks, studying your face, “A sleep aid?”
“I usually don’t like to,” You admit, “I always feel groggy the next day,”
“And we have another show,” He finishes for you, his lips coming together in a thin line as he thinks.
There’s nothing really for him to do, but it’s kind of him anyway to be so concerned. They always are, this rare group of eight idols who remember staff birthdays, bring coffee on the early morning schedules, and always, always take extra time to clean up after themselves so it’s not left to anyone else.
You take a step closer towards him and glance over his bare face and then it occurs to you, “You know what’s funny?”
“Hmm?” He tilts his face up to you.
“I don’t think I’ve ever done your makeup before,” You smile, it’s a ridiculous thought.
“No way,” He blinks, thinking back, “it’s been… forever, are you sure?”
You nod, “You’re usually with Eunji,” you tell him, “and even when we’ve swapped around, I don’t think so. I think you’re the only member I’ve never done,”
“Wow,” He laughs, eyes bright, “well, I guess there’s a first time for everything.”
“Is there anything,” You start to ask him if there’s anything he prefers, anything special about his makeup that he gets done with Eunji that he asks for, but Iseul catches you idle as she pats foundation onto San’s forehead and answers for you.
“His skin gets dry,” She jumps in, “don’t use too much powder,”
Yunho grins, a laugh on his lips at the directness of her words.
“And don’t use that oil,” Iseul adds, “that primer oil you like, he’ll break out by tomorrow,”
“Thank you, Iseul,” Yunho says, and you watch San’s face as he stifles a chuckle.
“Noted,” You smile, and you swap out two of the products in your hands before taking up your position by his side again.
You’ve gotten used to working with idols, to working with Ateez and with Yunho specifically, and yet when you get this close a little flutter of nerves rocks through your belly. He’s handsome, and if you’re being honest he’s just your type. Maybe it’s the exhaustion, or this weird feeling in your chest that you’ve been dealing with all week, but for the first time in a long time you think about what it would be like to kiss his lips.
“How do you want me?” He asks, breaking your thoughts, and you have to shake off the impending blush at the way his words make you feel. You have work to do, and you had gotten over your silly little crush on him years ago, you need to get a grip.
You recover fairly smoothly though with a quick smile, “Right,” he’s never worked with you before, and he’s looking to you for direction, “head back a bit, please, and eyes closed,”
“Alright,” He follows your instructions to the letter.
“Okay,” You tell him, “primer first. Let me know if anything bothers you,”
“Mhm,” He hums and stays relaxed.
He has the loveliest eyelashes, that’s the thought that echoes through your brain as you start working on him, and you wish it never occurred to you at all because you keep glancing up at his closed eyes. He lets you work, he knows you’re exhausted so he doesn’t push you for conversation, and you’re strangely grateful. You know he’s chatty sometimes in the chair, an extrovert through and through and always keeping Eunji company or talking with the member beside him, but right now he keeps still and gives you respite on a hard day.
You’re patting foundation into his skin with a large paddle brush when Iseul interrupts your thoughts, “Do you have that eggplant liner?”
“Check my table,” You offer, but with how sluggish your brain is feeling there’s no way you remember a single thing on your station without looking.
“Mm,” She pivots around and pokes through the products and tools behind you, and you glance over as San opens his eyes to watch Iseul rifle through things.
“Damn,” She mutters, “how much time do we have?”
“Um,” You glance down at your watch, “twenty?”
“Perfect,” She scoots behind you and disappears into the hall, no doubt to find your traveling makeup case and the liner.
You sigh, chewing the inside of your lip at the idea that you only have twenty more minutes, but you really don’t want to rush and have his makeup melt off on-stage.
“You’re fine,” San assures, his body angled towards you and Yunho now while he waits, “don’t worry about the clock,”
Yunho hums his agreement from below you, “Plenty of time,”
You refocus on Yunho’s skin and notice a long black and white hair from the paddle brush affixed to his cheek, mixed in with the foundation. You take the brush again, wiping off any excess foundation and checking to see if more fibers are loose, and then you work the brush against his cheek in an attempt to free the loose hair but it isn’t coming off easily. Every attempt you make just slides the hair into a different spot on his cheek and covers it with more foundation.
“Um,” You usually don’t like to do this, but you might have to, “can I just…”
His eyes open but his expression stays smooth, “Can you?”
“Sorry,” You shake your head, “do you mind if I touch you?”
“You already are,” He smiles, a small, amused crease between his brows you’ll have to pat out momentarily.
You tuck your brush away and gesture with your hand, “You just have a hair,”
“Oh,” He laughs, “of course, yeah,”
You’re just supposed to touch his cheek, brush away the hair with the pad of your finger and then get back to work, that’s all it is, so you’re completely unprepared for the feeling that rockets through your chest when your skin finally touches his.
Yunho gasps softly as your fingers brush over his cheek, his eyes blowing wide and his expression blanking, and it’s the only indication you have that he feels something too. A tightness wrenches in your chest, like someone pressed something hot and hard directly into your breastbone and your stomach does a somersault. Your ears are ringing, and you’re pretty sure your heart is about to beat out of your chest now that it’s started up again.
The tattoo on your chest feels warm beneath your blouse.
“You,” Yunho manages, his voice shaky and you know for sure he felt it too.
You rock back a step, “I don’t understand,”
“Shit,” Someone else says, and then you realize that it’s San and you’re not alone with the only other person in the entire world, you’re in the middle of work in front of at least one other person and it’s only your existence that just got tilted on its axis. Yours and maybe Yunho’s.
“Oh,” You glance to the side, taking in San’s wide eyed expression, “oh my God,”
“I’m not insane, am I?” Yunho smiles, his focus entirely on you, and you think you might just pass out, “You felt that?”
There’s a noise in the hall and San scrambles up to his feet, “Iseul,” he says heading for the door, “do you need help looking?”
He’s covering for you both, but thoughts are slow to form and all you can manage is blinking at the man in your chair.
“You did, right?” He asks again, eyes soft and hopeful, and then his fingers brush over the center of his chest. Squarely over his breastbone.
He’s yours.
You want to reach out and yank up his shirt, check the tattoo over his heart to see if it’s the same looping knot shape as yours, but you don’t need to see it to know for sure. It’s him.
San says something about forgetting the liner altogether, a little louder so you both know the room is going to get crowded again, and you shake your head to jolt yourself out of your paralyzed position.
“You didn’t?” His hand falls.
“I did,” You rush to correct, “I’m, I don’t know,”
He nods, wetting his lips and shifting in his chair. He moves to reach for you, but reason and sense click back into place immediately and you realize that no matter what your tattoo feels like and no matter what this means, you’re at work and about to have a very private moment in a very public place if you’re not careful.
You shake your head with a glance at his hand and jerk your head towards the door, “Later,”
“Right,” He leans back from you, “of course, right,”
Footsteps to your right draw your attention and Iseul is huffing, checking her own watch, “We’ll do brown,”
“That’ll be fine,” San assures her, but his eyes are glued on the pair of you.
Iseul moves to step around you again and realizes you’re just standing there, “What’s with you?”
“Sorry,” You manage, blinking hard and refocusing, “I just got dizzy,”
It’s not entirely a lie, given that you felt the entire earth shift under your feet thirty seconds ago and your life is completely changed. Dizzy is the least of how you’re feeling.
Yunho’s expression shifts immediately, concern across his face, and he curls his fingers into his palms to keep himself from reaching out again, from being too familiar.
“Oh,” Her eyebrows raise high, “do you need me to finish Yunho?”
“N-no,” You take a breath, “just give me one second,”
“Are you sure you’re alright?” Yunho asks, and in the back of your brain you wonder if his voice has always sounded this good.
“Here,” San cuts in smoothly, cracking the seal on a fresh water bottle and passing it over to you, “do you need to sit a minute?”
San’s hand rests on your upper back between your shoulders as you take a long sip of water, the cold shocking your brain back to reality in exactly the way you need.
“Thank you,” You tell him honestly, “I think I’m okay, just a headrush,”
San nods, and when you refocus your eyes on Yunho, you almost laugh. His gaze is squarely on San’s hand where it sits on your back, and you watch the fast, silent exchange between the two men when San drops his hand and Yunho realizes his own reaction. He blushes, ears running red and he dips his head to avoid both your eyes.
“Iseul,” San steps around you both and distracts your friend, “ready to wrap?”
“Yeah,” She agrees, “let’s finish up. You’re sure you’re okay, y/n?”
“Mhm,” You hardly trust your own voice, but you nod anyway, “I’m good now.”
Yunho tilts his face back up as you step close, and the tension between you is so palpable and so familiar that you can hardly breathe. Your tattoo feels warm and heavy and something tells you that his does too, you can see it in the tenderness of his brown eyes.
“Dizzy?” He asks quietly, keeping his words just for you.
You shake your head, “No,”
“That’s good,” He murmurs, but he lets whatever words he wants to say rest on his tongue.
Your tattoo throbs and you don’t dare touch his bare skin again.
His makeup takes fifteen more minutes and his eyes don’t stray from your face the entire time. You barely finish on time, and wardrobe is standing by to get them into their first outfits of the night, so when you put the final touches on he’s already being pulled out of the chair before you have a chance to say anything.
You want to corner him and ask him exactly when he’ll have time to talk later, but despite working together for the last few years, you and Yunho aren’t that close. You’re friendly, but you’re not familiar enough to casually ask what he’s doing later and not have it seem strange. While friendships between staff members and idols are not discouraged, even between the opposite sex, being overly familiar or suggestive would certainly leave a question in everyone’s minds, and you don’t want to draw attention to yourself that quickly.
This is between you and Yunho, no one else. You don’t want an audience for this.
So he goes, pulled away by wardrobe and his other members, fitted quickly into his Soundcheck outfit. He has his game face on, so do all the members, and you watch him disappear down the hall without a second glance back at you.
You collapse into the couch and press your eyes closed, focusing on the singular feeling of heat and soreness from your chest.
A soulmate.
The tattoo on your chest was one you barely looked at anymore, too focused on living your life to sit in the mirror and wonder about the person who would be your other half, the person that would slot into the gaps in your spirit with a simple brush of skin on skin. But now, it aches. It pulses to remind you that it’s real and that you’ve found him.
Everything in your life is about to change. Has already changed.
On the couch you don’t sleep as much as you disassociate, still stunned, your buzzing brain filtering out everything Iseul says as she cleans up around you and preps both of your brush belts for touch ups. There’s such a small amount of time between Soundcheck and the concert that you barely get to process, you just exist, playing the moment you touched him over again and again in your mind. Despite how utterly changed you feel, the world is just continuing on around you like a regular day.
Once again, you and Yunho miss each other for every brief moment between Soundcheck and stage.
The shift happens in the wings, in the underbelly of the stage where you and the other staff members for hair, makeup, and wardrobe wait for any last minute quick fixes. The eight of them are almost ready, pumping themselves up between rows of technical equipment and stage scaffolding.
There’s so much commotion around you and yet your eyes are drawn to him like a magnet, the feelings you once had for him coming back to you full force in a blurry torrent.
He shifts, stretches, swallows hard, and then looks up directly into your eyes. There’s a question in them that you can’t read, but you manage to smile.
His shoulders relax just a little.
You raise your fist, giving him the gesture for ‘fighting’ and he returns it with a wide grin.
“Alright,” Hongjoong’s voice cuts through, the final step of their pre-show ritual as the concert hall starts to roar, “huddle up.”
The eight of them circle up with each other, one leg in and one out.
“We’ve practiced hard,” Hongjoong starts, patting his members on the back, “let that practice pay off, and have fun out there,”
“Okay!” San hypes them up, getting the tension high.
“Let’s give it our all,” Hongjoong continues, a wide smile on his face, “fighting!”
They echo it back, and a tense feeling starts to roll in your gut.
“Alright, one,” Hongjoong starts the count and you feel the tension in your own body rising, enough to make you take a soft step back from the group, “two,”
On three they chorus it, moving their feet in a synchronized step, “Eight makes one team! Fighting!”
They break apart, clapping each other on the back, and your eyes meet Yunho’s for one more fast second before he’s jogging after the rest of the members and finding his mark on the stage risers.
You feel the sensation of his eyes on you even after he’s gone. You have the length of four songs and their opening ments before members start swapping out on stage for makeup touch-ups and technical adjustments. The sound of the audience is intense, the start of the first song keying up, and you stumble back from your post to get a breath of air away from it all.
There’s a bathroom along the hallway two doors down from the green room that’s meant for staff and you blissfully find it empty. With shaking hands you flip the lock and sink down into a crouch, your back braced against the wall as you breathe through the sudden wave of feelings filling your chest.
Adrenaline, that’s what the bitter taste on your tongue is.
Your heart is thumping, double time like you’re running a marathon, and then you realize it. You can feel him, even now with the bond between you unfulfilled you can feel his emotions coming to you like a wave. Adrenaline, anxiety, euphoria, exhaustion, it all roils through you and you brace your hands on the wall to get your composure back.
They say the first time you feel your soulmate link it takes you by surprise, but this is an intensity you couldn’t have imagined. It’s all encompassing and honestly terrifying, and you’re struggling to understand which parts of you are you and which are him. You can’t conceive of how an accepted bond would make this feeling stronger when it already feels like your emotions and his are knit together so tightly.
Anxiety strikes down the link and you realize it’s not stage fright, it’s for you. He can feel your panic and your fear just like you can feel every ounce of his performance and if you don’t get yourself in check you’re going to be distracting him even more than you already are.
You yank yourself up off the floor and collapse against the sink, turning on the cold water tap and taking slow and steadying breaths. In through the nose, out through the mouth. Counting slowly, relaxing your body with every pulse of oxygen through your system. You hope he can feel it, but you have no idea how this all really works. You’ll have to call your sister when this is all said and done, find out what she felt when she met her wife, but right now in this bathroom in Berlin you have to do this by yourself.
You hear the pulse of another song thrumming through the stadium as they keep performing, and you feel the thundering beat of his heart in your chest, but you breathe into it this time and try to keep yourself calm for his sake. You splash cold water on your face, keep breathing low and slow, and eventually you pull yourself back up to standing tall to look at yourself in the mirror.
You look the same as you did a few hours ago, before him, but the warmth in your chest is still present and you wonder if that will ever go away or if that’s just a permanent part of the link.
With shaky hands you unbutton your blouse and pull your bralette down in the center to reveal what you already know is there. Your breath catches in your throat at the sight.
The tattoo nestled at the base of your sternum is the only one you were born with. Every other line of ink on your body was put there with intention, but this one you’ve had for as long as you can remember. The maedeup knot is small, but intricate, and until this moment it had always been colorless. Loops of black and gray twining together to make a rounded diamond, unbroken with no beginning or end to the threads.
Now the ink has changed, a deep red against your skin that makes the knotted josephin soulmark look even more traditional, but the skin is slightly inflamed, tender to the touch as you brush your fingertips along it. It feels like a fresh mark, not something you’ve had since birth, but considering how it’s changed, maybe it is new. A soulmark shifting color is common, you know that, but it still stands out so starkly against your skin and your other black tattoos. You can’t look away from it.
A pounding on the bathroom door makes you jump and you fix your shirt, covering the mark back up and buttoning it away. You wonder if Yunho’s mark is the exact same like other couples you know and if it too turned red, if it’s warm to the touch, if he felt you brush against your mark through the link.
“y/n?” A voice comes through the door and you shut off the tap.
“Coming!” You wipe the excess water on your hands onto your jeans and take one last, fast look to make sure your mark isn’t visible, before opening the bathroom door.
Wonshik, one of their many managers, is waiting for you on the other side. His eyes narrow when he sees you, “Are you ill?”
“No,” You assure him.
“You’re sure?” He presses, “We can’t afford to lose any more staff or risk getting the members sick if you are,”
“I know, Wonshik,” You nod, “I promise I’m just tired, jet-lagged. I was putting cold water on my face, that’s all. I’m not sick,”
He exhales in relief, his expression softening, “Thank God,” he says, “I can only take so many surprises.”
A little sickness is nothing compared to a staff member and an idol under a dating ban being soulmarked, but you hold your tongue.
“They’re about to come off,” He says, “Iseul was looking for you, she seems like she might start climbing the walls if you don’t get back to help her,”
“No, of course,” You start back towards the side stage entrance, “I lost track of time, but it won’t happen again,”
“Make sure you sleep tonight,” He adds, following you closely, “no sleep means no immune system, and no immune system means sick.”
“Don’t worry,” You promise, winding your way through the dark backstage, “you won’t lose me,”
“I better not,” He sighs, and then Iseul comes into sight.
“There you are!” She hisses low under her breath, “I was about to have a panic attack,”
“I’m sorry, I’m here, I’m good,” In the commotion, your brain starts to ease into normalcy. You’re used to this pace, the speed of lightning fast makeup touch-ups and assisting wardrobe when things start to go awry with their quick changes. The audience feels none of this, they just see smooth change-outs on stage and cool idols in new clothes, but backstage is a wild flurry and it always puts you on an entirely different plane of focus.
“Here we go,” A stage director starts, gathering everyone’s attention, “four minutes… starting…”
The stage goes dark and in the venue a video starts to play to the crowd to fill the space between costume changes. You prep your hands, making sure your kit is ready to go and you see the wardrobe specialists out of the corner of your eye readying themselves to help facilitate the quick change.
Suddenly they’re here, and the stage director interrupts once more, “Now, four minutes people, let’s go.”
“Mingi,” He gets to you first and he crouches down to drop his face to your height, “stay still one second,”
He says nothing, but he nods as you pat powder across his forehead and the bridge of his nose, checking him over for any other defects. He looks good and you nod, “Go, go,”
Mingi peels off to the left of you and you hear the sound of fabric swishing as he and Wooyoung rip off the top layer of their outfits behind the privacy screens and trade garments with the wardrobe team. It’s a fast shuffle, but you stay focused on who’s in front of you.
“Seonghwa,” You wave to him, pulling blotting tissues out of the pack on your belt, “here,”
He knows this drill well, you’re used to working with him and you have a clean routine down. He blots the sweat off his brow himself and starts to unbutton his jacket while you shift focus to Yunho.
For a split second you almost forget what happened earlier in the buzz of backstage, but the minute your eyes hold on his awareness floods you.
“Hey,” You say, but there’s a time clock shout behind you and you beckon him down, “come here, let me fix things,”
He drops down to your height just like Mingi did and stays steady while you work, but his eyes flick up, “You’re okay?”
“I’m good,” You nod, “don’t worry,”
His expression clears a little and you guess you have your answer about the feeling of the link going both ways.
Hongjoong clears his throat behind you both, “We’re short on time,”
“Am I good?” Yunho checks.
Your eyes flick over him fast, “Yep,”
He’s out of your eyeline a split second later, and you’re grateful for the distraction of both Hongjoong and Seonghwa, otherwise you’re sure you’d dwell a little bit too long on the fact that Yunho’s half naked next to you, privacy screen or no.
“One minute,” The stage director announces, “everyone’s doing great,”
The boys are almost done, flying through the last of their zips and getting their hair smoothed down by that team as they finish. You put the last pat of powder on Seonghwa’s nose and give him a nod before he’s gone too, dropping his jacket as he goes and giving you all a quick flash of his bare back.
You turn back towards the group as they prepare and your eyes zero in on Yunho again. His expression is serious, it’s his game face before he gets back out on stage, and you watch as he corrects the placement of his in-ears and ensures that his mic pack is secured. He runs through his pre-stage ritual and you can’t help but be a captive audience.
“Good work,” The stage director says as Seonghwa rejoins the eight, fully dressed and ready for stage, “fifteen seconds for act two,”
The crowd heats up again as the video starts to fade, and the members do their final checks. Yunho doesn’t look back at you once, his eyes forward and focused as he and the other members find their places on the rising platform that will take them back out to the main stage.
You can see him a little though, in the low light in his white trousers and blue satin shirt. He lifts his hand, adjusting his microphone once again, and then as he drops it back to his side he lets his fingers skim over the familiar hollow of his chest.
Your mark warms, you feel it as if it were your chest he brushed his fingers over, and your breath stops.
The platform rises, the crowd roars, and your heart starts beating to a new rhythm.
He really is yours.
It turns out that later means much later.
You manage to get out of dinner with some of the other staff members, but that just leaves you anxious and alone in a hotel room trying and failing to eat room service. Iseul would be back soon to take up her place in the other bed, and you’re starting to realize that you don’t have Yunho’s number.
Now that emotions are a little smoother, you can’t feel him. Or maybe you can, but it’s so faint that you’re not sure. All you know is that he’s definitely in the hotel, but that’s partially the solid feeling of your link with him and partially the YouTube live being broadcast from Seonghwa’s room where all of the members are.
You put the live on and watch, feeling strangely disconnected from the men on screen. You’ve known them for years, but suddenly with this new truth everything feels foreign and confusing.
You should call your sister, but it’s only six in the morning in Korea and even though this is an emergency of life altering and epic proportions, you can’t bring yourself to wake her on a Saturday.
You try your best to eat the pasta you ordered and watch as the live eventually ends. Your phone dings and for a split second you think it will be him, but it’s just Iseul telling you she’s heading back to the hotel.
A soft knock at the door makes your stomach lurch.
You’re frozen.
There’s another knock, a little firmer this time but then you feel the warm touch against your mark and you’re on your feet, your hand on the door handle before you can think.
He looks tired, that’s your first thought. His face is bare again, and his eyes are rimmed in a little bit of red like he just removed the day’s stage makeup. Despite all that, he smiles when he sees you and sighs, leaning against the door frame, “You’re awake,” he says.
“I waited,” You manage.
He grimaces, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to,” his eyes flick behind you into the room and he swallows, “are you alone?”
“Yes,” You nod, “but not for long, Iseul’s on her way,”
He nods, “Come to my room?”
“Are you sure?” Your eyes widen.
“We need to talk,” He nods, “can you get away for a little while?”
Iseul will probably expect you to be asleep, but you can’t let this go until morning. If you’re ever going to sleep you need to talk to him now.
“I’ll think of something,” You tell him, “what room?”
“2606,” He answers, reaching into his pockets and producing an envelope from the front desk, “take this,”
He passes you one of his room keys and you nod, “I’ll be up in five minutes, but you should go,”
“Okay,” He breathes and neither one of you makes a single move to step away from the door until a sound down the hallway pushes you into it.
“2606,” You repeat and he nods, swiftly moving down the hall before anyone can see him standing at your door.
You have no idea what you’re going to tell Iseul that would make sense, but you don’t care. You stack up your room service for collection, kick on a pair of slippers, and give yourself the fastest look in the mirror ever on your way out the door. You want to be gone before she gets back, the idea of facing her and lying ten times more difficult than an empty text.
No problem - I can’t sleep, I’m just going to walk a bit. Don’t wait up.
You don’t stick around to see if she’ll believe it.
You try to seem casual when walking to Yunho’s room, like it's yours. You don’t want anyone to give you a second glance and wonder where you’re going, so you keep your head up, smile at anyone you pass, and when his door comes into view you scan the card like it’s any other day.
When the heavy door shuts behind you, you sigh.
“God, finally,” His voice startles you, and you look up to see him pacing, “I’ve been going insane all day,”
Your shoulders drop, you aren’t alone, “Me too,”
He runs a hand through his black hair and finally stops pacing, but doesn’t come any closer, “So, this is real?”
“It feels pretty real,”
“How did we never feel it?” He manages, “I’ve known you for years,”
“We’ve never touched until today,” You tell him, and that has to be the reason, it’s the only thing that makes sense. You’ve been turning it over in your mind all night, and with the exception of bumping into him last week in the hall, it’s all been polite bows and waves.
“How is that even possible,” He breathes, “team dinners? Holiday parties? Work?”
“Skin to skin,” You murmur, “I think that’s what it was,”
“I had no idea,” He swallows, gesturing in the negative space between your bodies, “I always liked you, but I thought it was just, you know, a crush,”
“You what?” Your eyebrows raise.
“Well,” He backtracks, “not like that, it’s not like I’ve been holding a candle.”
Your face stays neutral, but he grimaces at his own words.
“I’m fucking this up,” He takes a deep breath, “I’m sorry, I’m really nervous.”
Your stomach warms, “Yunho, it’s okay, honestly,”
“I just meant I’ve always liked you, I thought about asking you out when our contracts loosened up if you were still single.” He clarifies and then you watch his face blanch, “You are single, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” You nod, “we don’t have to worry about that,”
He nods and you see him searching for the next thing to say, the right thing.
“Your mark,” You cut in, taking a few steps further into the room, “did it change?”
“Completely,” He nods, “did yours?”
“Yeah,” You wonder the right way to ask him if you can see.
“Does it feel,” He starts.
“Warm?”
“Yes,” He nods, “and tender?”
“Like a fresh tattoo,” You take another step in.
“I’ve never gotten a tattoo,” He confesses, “but I’ll take your word for it,”
“Can I,” The words are stuck on your tongue, “maybe this is weird, but I mean, I guess we’re soulmates,”
“You want to see it?” He surmises.
“Only if you’re comfortable,”
His lips quirk, “I’m comfortable,”
Heat twists in your gut and you wonder if he can feel that too. If he does he doesn’t say it, but you watch as he pulls the black t-shirt off over his head.
You’ve never seen his chest. Any inch of his skin except for his neck and arms really, and you guess that was part of keeping his soulmark covered. Idols always do, even when they’re in the most inconvenient locations, there’s always makeup or flesh colored tape or editing to take care of it. The idea that someone could replicate it and try to fake a connection is far too real for someone famous.
He drops his shirt onto the bed and pink tinges his cheeks as he gestures towards it, “Well,”
Your mouth drops, it’s the exact same, down to the size and the placement and every little loop and you stumble forwards to get a better look, “Yunho,”
“Yeah?”
“Has yours always been red?” You reach out, your fingertips hovering just over it.
He shakes his head, “Not before today,”
“Mine’s the same,” You tell him, your eyes glued to his sternum, “just the same,”
You know every centimeter of this tattoo. You’ve studied it a thousand times in the mirror, tracing over every curve with your eyes, trying to find the place where the cord starts and ends. He sucks in a sharp breath as your fingers brush gently along his mark, and you feel the ghost of the sensation against your own.
“I can’t believe we never knew,” You murmur, sliding your finger along each rounded edge.
“You feel that?” He asks, “Right?”
You’re nodding and moving to tug off your sweater before you can even think it through. He starts to shake his head, to say that you don’t have to, but you’re already tossing the sweater next to his discarded shirt and tugging down the front band of your bralette so he can see the whole mark.
His eyes flick over you fast, but with the matching mark in front of him he doesn’t focus on anything else, “It’s exactly the same,”
“I know,” You reach for his hand, but the minute more of your skin connects with his you feel your chest throb and you drop it like it burns you.
He winces, touching his chest again, “Is it supposed to hurt?”
“In the beginning,” You nod, “I think?”
“Does it always feel like that?”
“I’m not sure,” You admit, “I was going to call my sister and ask, but it’s too early at home,”
He smiles, “Your sister found her soulmate?”
“In highschool,” You smile back, “they’ve been bonded together since they were eighteen,”
“Older or younger?” He asks, and you realize just how little you know about each other despite how long you’ve worked alongside him.
“Younger,” You say.
“I have a little brother,” He replies, “but he’s still in school,”
You nod, painfully aware that this is such a strange conversation to have with your shirts off just standing in the middle of a hotel room, but somehow it’s easier than any date you’ve ever had.
Your eyes flick from his eyes to his mark and he reaches out a hand again, “Can I?”
Your heart quickens and you nod.
His fingertips graze over the edge of your mark, mimicking your touch from before, sliding along the edges of the tattoo. His eyes widen and you know he’s feeling the sensation in his own mark, a mirror image of each other.
“This doesn’t hurt,” He observes, letting his fingers linger.
“I think we have to get used to each other,” You remember that fact from somewhere, “the link has been dormant for a long time, I think it takes a minute to get used to having it,”
“Makes sense,” He murmurs, his eyes still squarely on your mark, “I’ll be honest though, I still really want to touch you,”
“Yeah?” Your voice is thready.
His fingers fall away and he nods, “Don’t you?”
“Yes,” You agree, painfully quickly.
He swallows tightly and takes the smallest step forwards, before offering out his hand, palm up and waiting for you.
Your eyes flick from his face down to his outstretched hand, and you reach for him slowly. You let your fingertips skate over the skin of his palm, down each digit, ghost the pads of your fingertips together. It’s warm, sharp and dizzying even just to brush against each other.
You wonder what more will feel like.
“Can I try something?” He murmurs, his voice nearly a whisper even though you’re all alone.
You nod.
He wets his lips unconsciously and moves a little closer, your bodies now only inches apart. Anxiety, anticipation, thrill, it all runs through your gut like a whirling wind and you shiver at the torrent of his emotions, a grin breaking out over your face.
His smile mirrors yours, “Your heart’s beating a mile a minute,”
“You can feel that?”
“Yeah,” He breathes, grin widening, “this is crazy,”
You laugh, a little nervous, a little elated, and he finally reaches out his hands.
He takes a steadying breath, and then his fingertips brush along your jaw.
You suck in a sharp gasp at the sensation, electric and hot, the feeling rocketing through your entire body. You tilt your face up to his as he continues his gentle touches, your eyes watching him as he studies you. His plush lips are parted, brown eyes wide with awe as he grows a little bolder to brush over your cheeks, down your throat, and back up to your jawline.
“Feel alright?” He murmurs.
You nod into his touch and he starts to lift off but you reach for him, “Don’t stop,”
Your hands land safely on his hips, still covered by his sweatpants and you watch him swallow again at the sudden contact, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. Warmth fills the bond, no doubt the first threads of his arousal, and you wonder if he can feel your own. If he can sense how much he’s affecting you with just his fingertips on your face.
His hands settle back on your skin, this time smoothing across you with his palms, one hand cupping your cheek and the other sliding over your shoulder and down your bare back.
You can barely breathe, the room so silent and around you, like the only thing in the universe that exists is the two of you orbiting each other, standing at the precipice of something so catastrophic and wonderful.
Your hands adjust, resting on his taut abdomen as you move a little closer together, and his eyes flutter shut as he breathes through the sensation of your hands on him properly for the first time.
“You’re so warm,” You murmur, your hands softly tracing his abdominal muscles, instinct guiding you to touch more of him, seek out every inch of him as you unconsciously make a map of his body in your mind.
He hums pleasantly, eyes reopening, “So are you,”
He feels so right, so essential under your touch.
Yunho wets his lips softly with his tongue, and a nervous thrill passes through your belly. His eyes flick over you, the pad of his thumb sweeping a line over your lips. You suppress a needy sound, still trying to keep your head amidst the thrumming emotions and steady thumps of your heart.
He doesn’t stop, just stroking your skin slowly, fingers on your back pressing just a little as he sighs.
“Yunho,” You shiver.
“Cold?” He gravitates a little closer.
“N-no,” Your body is all but pressed flush against him now, and you have to lean your face up even more just to see him as he stands tall over you.
“I…” He starts to say something but lets the words die off, like he’s thinking something through, but then he sighs, “forget it,”
His lips are on yours.
Yunho lifts you, wrapping his arms around your back and tugging you up into his embrace. You gasp against his mouth, finding his shoulders to hold onto as one of his arms bands around your lower back.
The kiss is shattering, the world tilting once again, a new frequency humming between your two bodies. It’s hot, your skin buzzing from the contact, but the way you move together is fluid and easy. Your legs part naturally, settling around his hips and his free hand finds your plush thigh as he tugs you into place, slotting your bodies together like they were always meant to be.
“I’m sorry,” He mumbles against your lips when he draws in a quick breath, but he doesn’t stop kissing you. His nose nuzzles against yours, and his lips part at the same moment yours do, tongues meeting in the space between your mouths to flick against each other.
“Don’t,” You push closer to him, fingers knotting into the back of his hair as you kiss him back.
He hums, the hand on your thigh sliding up to cup your ass and you shiver as his wide hand stretches across your backside, squeezing your pillowy flesh.
A tiny whimper does leave you then, liquid heat spreading through your body, the combined sensation of both your arousals giving you a headrush.
“So beautiful,” He sighs between kisses, “you’re so beautiful,”
“Yunho,” Your voice is thready, his name a stretched out sound.
He holds you close, nearly stumbling as he moves. You blink your eyes open just as he spins you both, pushing you up against the hotel wall and pinning you in place with the weight of his body. You should slow things down, but nothing in your life has ever felt this good and you find yourself diving back to meet his kiss again.
His arm slides out from behind your back as he pushes closer, your body fully supported by the flat of the wall behind you and his hips under yours and one hand firmly anchored on your ass. With his arm free he cups your cheek, a pleased sound on his lips as he dips you back into the wall and deepens the kiss.
Heat blooms through you, your kisses getting needier, artless and desperate just to get a little closer together. The kind of kissing that sounds as messy as it is, tiny pants and moans muffled between you, skin on skin, tongue on tongue.
“God,” He shudders, his lips breaking away, but his eyes only flick over you for a second before he dives back in. This time his lips travel, hot kisses across your jaw and back to the hollow of your ear, down your throat as he holds you a little higher on the wall for the right access.
You grip his shoulders with one hand and lock your fingers in his mess of black hair with the other, your head falling back against the wall. He pants against your throat, a soft groan as he kisses, and your stomach tightens pleasantly.
“Y-Yunho,” You gasp, arousal rolling through you, and unconsciously you rock your hips, desperately seeking some kind of friction.
He hums low in his throat, kissing back up your neck fast to get to your lips again and his hand slides off your cheek as he crowds you tighter, bracing himself against the wall above your head. His abdomen presses against your core, and even through layers of fabric you feel his heat. Hungrily, you roll your hips again and catch a little pressure, moaning in earnest against his mouth.
Yunho makes a tight sound and then he breaks the kiss, his forehead pressing hard against yours as he takes in slow breaths, his body all but trembling with need as he holds you.
“We need to slow down,” He manages.
You can’t find words, not yet, but you nod against him.
“You deserve better,” He says, “dates, presents,”
You laugh softly, your hand in his hair softening from a grip to a gentle hold, carding through the long locks at the base of his neck, “I don’t need all that,”
He smiles wide, brushing off your words, “Still,” He sighs, still recovering from the heated make out, “I think I have more self control than fulfilling our bond by fucking you into the wall,”
Reality bleeds back in at that. Soulmarks were just that, indicator marks. A way to find your person amidst a sea of thousands, if not millions. All the shared sensation and emotion a precursor to something more permanent and binding, something only sealed together by sex.
You lift your head up, and he leans back to mirror you.
“I lost my head there,” You admit, warm blush in your cheeks, “I didn’t know it would feel like this,”
He smiles, and you take in his expression. His hair is a mess, mussed and disheveled and his face is pink from his nose down to the dark, well-kissed curve of his lips. His bare chest is flushed bright pink and his eyes are bright and warm. You fight the urge to kiss him again.
“Me either,” He shakes his head, “it’s incredible,”
“Overwhelming,” You nod, exhaling softly.
He makes a soft sound to agree and then starts to push back from the wall gingerly, letting you slowly unwrap your legs from his waist and ease down to the floor.
He lets you go when you’re steady on your feet and clears his throat, adjusting the waistband of his sweatpants and running a hand through his tangled locks. He’s hard, that much is obvious from the distinct outline of his cock through the gray fabric, but you do your best to look away and not think about how thick and heavy it looked just from kissing you.
“Jesus,” He adjusts his sweats again, “sorry,”
“It’s fine,” You cup your own cheeks with cool fingers, “I promise you’re not the only one,”
His eyes hold yours for a lengthy beat and then he swallows, taking a wide step back and nodding, “Right,” he shakes his head, “we’re supposed to be slowing down.”
“Slow,” You lean against the wall behind you, crossing your arms over your chest and trying to steady your thumping heart.
“I’m going over here,” He grins and walks to the far wall by the door to the bathroom, leaning back and crossing his own arms, “we really should talk,”
A pulse of anxiety flickers through you, and you realize just how quickly you went from his hotel room door to nearly falling into bed. He’s handsome, a kind man, your once upon a time crush, and certainly fated to be a good match for you, but that doesn’t mean you should throw out good sense and rush things. No matter how much your impulses were screaming at you to do just that.
You try to ignore the fact that there’s a bed between you, and you nod, “You’re right,” you finally say, “we barely know each other,”
Yunho’s smile fades just a bit, “I wouldn’t say that,”
“We’re coworkers,” The words tumble out, “I know what we’re both feeling, but,”
His brow furrows as he thinks through your words and he shakes his head, “y/n,” he cuts you off, “do you believe in soulmates?”
“Yes, of course,” Even if you hadn’t before, the way you’re feeling now would be enough to dispel any skeptic.
He takes in a quick breath, the sound sharp as he draws it through his teeth and he cocks his head slightly to the side, “You’re scared,” he massages the top of his sternum with his fingers, and you recognize your own chest is tight with anxiety, “I can feel it, talk to me.”
The instant vulnerability of the bond is startling, and you can feel your own expression crumble. It’s suddenly a bit like being an ant caught under a magnifying glass, too much sharp attention all at once and you swallow tightly, eyes flicking away from his tender gaze.
“y/n,” He murmurs, “I’m not pushing for more, not tonight,”
“Yeah,” Your voice is soft, too quiet for your own liking. Something about the way he sees you so clearly and so quickly makes you feel exposed, nervous and strangely childlike.
“Hey,” He breaks through your little thought spiral, “look at me,”
You straighten up again, finding his eyes.
“I’m just happy I found you,” He tells you, and you feel the truth of it in your gut, “we can figure everything else out together, and at our own pace, okay?”
Relief spreads through you, the knot in your chest loosening, “Promise?”
“Promise,” He nods, raising one hand with his pinky extended, “I just want us to try,”
You nod, extending your own pinky to seal it, “Me too.”
He smiles at that, “Barely know each other,” he scolds softly, “I’m offended.”
“Oh yeah?” Tension bleeds out of your shoulders.
“Mhm,” His expression is full of cheek, “I’m the one with a crush, remember? I notice things,”
Your stomach flips pleasantly and your arms relax from their tight position crossed over your chest, “What things?”
“Let’s see,” He starts, and for a brief moment you think maybe he’s bluffing, but the moment he starts you melt and he holds your gaze as he warmly recites all the little things he’s noticed about you over the years.
“You only wear silver jewelry,” he notes first, nodding towards you.
Your tight hands uncurl.
“You have a ridiculous sweet tooth,” The more he talks the more he relaxes against the far wall, “and you start getting flushed after the second shot of soju, you really are a lightweight,”
“You always pick a Big Bang song for karaoke, and you’re late to work every Monday,” He laughs a little at that and keeps going, “you don’t wear a lot of color but when you do it’s red. We’re both from Gwangju but you moved to Seoul when you were five,”
Your heart starts to beat a little faster, warmth filling you again and you don’t know if it’s your affection or his anymore, but it hardly matters.
“Um,” He takes a deep breath and glances away for a moment and then catches more threads from his memory, “you’re a Sagittarius, you’re a runner, and the last book I saw you reading was Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982. I bought it, but I haven’t had a chance to read it just yet,”
“Yunho,” You find yourself smiling, a hand over your surprised lips.
“I’m just saying,” He shrugs a little, “we aren’t strangers. I know this is scary and fast and going to change the rest of our lives,”
Elation, pure joy, spills over unfettered from his side of your new emotional tether.
“But I like you,” He confesses, “I have for a while, and this,” he brushes his fingers along his soulmark, “just changes the timeline.”
He’s yours.
You push off the wall, crossing the room and all but leap back into his embrace, your arms looping around his shoulders again as you push up on tiptoe to kiss his lips.
“This is real,” You murmur.
“Yes,” He cups your cheeks, nodding as he pecks your lips again.
“You’re mine,”
“Yes,” He grins.
“Oh, this is crazy,” You laugh, forehead against his again.
“We’ll go slow,” He assures you again, “we’ll figure it out together,”
“Together,” You nod.
He dips low once more, this kiss more tender, and he separates you both before things can heat up again. “Hmm,” He glances across the bed and makes a small face at the time displayed on the digital clock, “did you eat?”
“I tried to,” You confess, “I was nervous,”
“You need to eat,” He snaps up his black shirt from the bed and slips it back on, and your chest warms. It’s strangely domestic, strangely commonplace like you’ve been in this position a thousand times before.
Yunho adjusts his shirt and then kisses your hair as he passes by you, padding over to the hotel microwave and searching through the assorted snacks and instant meals, “It’s too late for room service,”
“I’m okay,” You pull your own sweater back on and sit on the edge of his bed.
“y/n,” He glances back, a softly scolding tone.
“Really, you need to sleep,” You offer.
He dismisses that thought, “But I’m hungry, eat with me?”
You concede, and while he starts whipping up two servings of ramen, you wonder if this is what he’s going to be like. It makes sense, he’s always been a caretaking kind of person, but having it so tenderly directed at you feels right.
“When we get home,” He says as he pours in the spice packets, “I’ll take you somewhere nice,”
“This is nice,” You smile.
“y/n,” He sets the ramen on a side table and sits next to you, “this is cup noodle from a hotel microwave,”
“The company is nice,” You take the ramen happily though, and tuck into the warm meal.
“It is,”
“Mm, you know,” You slurp back some noodles and softly clear your throat, “you weren’t the only one with a crush,”
He freezes, letting his noodles drop back into his cup, “What?”
“I’ve always liked you,” Your own confession feels easier after his, “I put it aside since we work together, but I guess, I mean, what I’m trying to say is that we both felt it before the mark, you’re not alone in that.”
“I had no idea,”
“I’m very professional,” You tease him lightly.
He nudges you and tucks back into his noodles, “How long?”
“Hmm,” You get more comfortable, crossing your legs and scooting back a little onto the mattress, “I thought you were cute when we first met,”
“God,” He groans, “we were such kids,”
You nod, swallowing another bite, “Mhm, you had that blonde hair,”
He laughs.
“I remember thinking, ‘that one’s trouble’,” You confess.
“Me?” His eyebrows perk up, “I’m perfectly nice,”
“Trouble as in you’re my type,” You roll your eyes, “but I don’t think the crush properly came until later. You’ve always made me laugh, and when I realized how I was feeling I just did my best to keep some distance,”
He nods, face getting a little serious, “I know what you mean,”
That knowledge leaves you both a little quiet. The late hour, the adrenaline come down, all of it barrels into you at the same moment as the next anxious thought. How in the world were you both going to navigate this with a contract as tight as theirs and the public eye always watching?
“Yunho,” You murmur, the last of your noodles left to go cold as you sit with that thought, “Are we going to be able to figure this out?”
“Figure what out?” He looks genuinely confused by your question, “Us?”
“You’re an idol,” You nod towards him, “I’m staff,”
He rests a hand on your knee, “We’ll be fine,”
“Aren’t your contracts,” You trail off, letting him fill in the blanks.
“They’re strict, yes,” He nods, “year seven,”
Dating, romance, even the perception of it was more than discouraged by companies in this industry, their artists contractually obligated to be single and available and dedicated only to their fans. Five years would have been the industry standard to prevent any idol from being caught out with a partner, let alone a potential soulmarked one, but seven is excessive.
You blanch, “That’s almost two years away,”
“We will find a way,” He says, “we’re not the first people in the industry this has happened to,”
“Really?” You perk up, “Who?”
He falls short, “Well, I don’t know exactly, but it’s bound to have happened.”
“And then ruined their careers,” You groan, flopping back flat on the mattress and covering your face with a hand, “which is why we’ve never heard of them,”
Yunho laughs, earnestly laughs, and takes the half empty ramen cup out of your hand to discard, “Maybe, but for now, let’s just stay positive. Get to know eachother better,”
You nod.
“Nothing can change the fact that we found each other,” He points out, dropping down onto his side on the bed next to you, “and I’m okay with that.”
“So we just lie to everyone?” You chew at the inside of your lip, staring up at the white ceiling.
“Hey,” Yunho’s fingers tuck under your chin and draw your eyes to him, “I know you’re anxious,”
You sigh, letting his softness calm you again.
“I know,” He repeats, “I am too, but we don’t have to decide anything tonight. We’re both tired and it’s been an emotional day,”
“Okay,” You nod, “okay, yes, you’re right,”
His thumb strokes over your cheek again, and you watch him exhale and sink further into your touch, “Will you stay tonight?”
That wakes you up.
Your eyebrows raise, “Stay?”
“Just to sleep,” He assures you, “I just… I don’t want to be without you yet,”
“I need to get back before Iseul wakes up if we do that,” You note with a grimace.
“What time?” He glances back to the clock.
“Seven,” You say, “her alarm is set for seven-thirty,”
“We can do that,” He grabs his phone off the side table and sets an alarm, “we’ll get up,”
The pull between your bodies is so strong you’re fairly sure you would have stayed no matter the consequences, but you nod, “Then I’ll stay,”
He grins and pushes himself off the bed, “I’ve got clothes, if you want to get comfortable,”
“Sure,” you sit up and wait for him to find things in his still packed suitcase.
“Um,” He pulls a pair of black sweatpants from the bag, “these should work, and if you get cold,”
You smile as he grabs a gray hoodie and comes back to you.
As you start to pull off your sweater again, he turns around and leaves his back to you, “Sorry,”
“Thanks,” You chuckle, making short work of changing. You’re swimming in his clothes, but his sweatshirt smells like him and you just want to bury your face into it, “you can turn around now,”
His shoulders relax as he turns back, and you watch his lips part as he takes you in.
“What?”
“You look cute,” He clears his throat, shrugging off his reaction.
You smile and ease back onto the bed, “Oh, I get it,” you laugh, “is your guy brain on fire because I’m wearing your clothes? Is this some kind of… you won the competition, ownership thing?”
He scoffs and rolls his eyes, kneeling on the bed to shuffle closer, “No competition when you’re literally fated for me,”
“Right,” You let the word drag out on your tongue to tease him.
“But I like taking care of you already, and now you’re warm and comfortable,” He collapses next to you onto the mattress with a sigh, “and I know I don’t own you, but you are mine, just like I’m yours now. I won’t apologize for liking you in my clothes or in my bed, for liking when you look like my girlfriend,”
Warmth blooms in your cheeks and you duck your face into the sheets.
“Now come get under the covers,” He maneuvers the duvet, “it’s late, you were dead on your feet today,”
His voice is so warm and familiar, and you slide into the covers beside him.
In bed you keep a little distance, and despite the number of times both of you say that you should go to sleep, your conversation is almost impossible to stop. Yunho holds your hand in the middle space of the mattress between your bodies, and in the dim lighting of the hotel room you whisper thought after thought back and forth. A million things coming to mind you need to tell each other so suddenly now that you’ve found each other.
As you talk his fingers travel, restlessly stroking your skin, up and down your arm and tapping out patterns. When his palm slides back and forth over the sharp lines of the tattoos on your upper arm, and you feel the question slipping out of your lips and revealing more about yourself than you intended before you can catch it.
“Your parents,” You blurt out, “will they be happy?” He’s spoken about them so much over the past hour that you can’t help but ask him that question point blank.
“So happy,” He responds with ease, a laugh on his lips, “they always worried me being an idol meant I’d never be able to find the one and settle down, they’re going to love this story,”
You smile at the easy way he calls you ‘the one’, but the question you really asked still remains unanswered and you exhale softly, “But,” you manage, “will they be happy with me?”
Yunho stills, reaching across the bed to hook his finger under your chin and draw your eyes up to his again, “Very happy,” he says, “just like I am.”
Your muscles relax, his words a soothing balm, and you adjust your position on the pillow beneath you, “Just checking,”
“Mhm,” He studies your face, “jagi, why wouldn’t they be happy with you?”
The endearment slips off his lips with ease, and a burst of warmth spreads through you. You’ve never needed pet names and softness like this from a partner, but from him it makes your heart quicken.
The momentary elation fades though, and his question comes back into your mind. You take a deep breath, you owe it to him to tell him now, “My family won’t be happy,”
“With me?” His eyebrows raise.
“It’s me,” You shake your head, “my parents have difficult ideals, and I’ve never pleased them. It wouldn’t matter who you were, they… they’ll find a way to not be happy for me.”
His eyes soften, and his thumb strokes along your jaw, “I’m sorry,”
“It is what it is,”
“Are your parents soulmates?” He asks softly.
You shake your head, “No, they don’t really believe in soulmarks,”
You watch his eyes widen in surprise.
“Unless,” You can’t stop yourself from rolling your eyes, “the match is ‘fortuitous’,”
“For status?” He surmises.
“Status, money,” You shrug, “connection. But I think I could marry the next president and they’d still find a way to be disappointed in me,”
His jaw flexes tense for just a moment, before his expression smooths over again.
“Anyway,” You clear the bad thoughts away as quickly as they came, “my sister and I never went along like they wanted, like my cousins and the rest of my family, so we are the great disappointments. It’s not… it’s fine, but, I guess you should know before we, you know,”
He smiles, a bit of amusement in his expression that you can’t place, “Did you think having bad parents would scare me off?”
“It could,”
“No,” He slides a hand under your side and tugs you across the mattress to press a fast kiss to your lips, “it never could.”
“But I’m,” You start, all the reasons why a partner might care ringing in your ears.
“Beautiful?” He cuts you off, “Just my type? If it’s anything else I don’t want to hear you say it,”
Your stomach flip flops hard and you push lightly against his chest to get him to stop.
“The thing is,” He brushes your hair back from your cheek, “my parents are soulmates. I grew up in a house full of a lot of love, even when they were being strict and scolding us.”
Your smile at his warm expression.
“So I know they’ll love you,” He explains, “they know what this feels like, what it means. I have plenty of family for us both,”
Your throat constricts, tears threatening for a moment.
“Your sister, though,” He grounds you out of the bad thoughts without even thinking, “you two are close?”
“Very,”
“I’d like to meet her,” He smiles.
“You two would get along great, my sister and her wife both, actually,”
Yunho nods, listening attentively, “Do they have kids?”
“Not yet,” You groan, “but I’m dying to be an auntie,”
His thumb drags a comforting line across your cheekbone, his expression warm and affectionate, “Cute,”
You sink into the pillows, a yawn creeping up to your lips, “She’s going to lose her mind when I call her,”
“Yeah?”
“Mm,” You huff a laugh, “she thought that when I started working here I should have found an inconspicuous way to bump into all of you to test possible bonds. She’s going to be riding the ‘I told you so’ train.”
“She’s funny,” He smirks.
“Very,” You sigh, unconsciously cuddling into his warmth.
“Has it been a while since you’ve seen her?” He asks softly, adjusting his arms around you so that you’re cradled against his chest with the pillows at your back.
“Mhm,” You yawn again, the warmth of his body settling the last of the adrenaline inside you, “a while,”
“Let’s find a day off after the tour,” He tucks the duvet around you.
“Yeah?” Your eyes feel heavy.
“Yeah,” He kisses your forehead.
“Yunho,” You yawn again, dipping your forehead into his chest, “God, I’m so tired again,”
“Mhm,” He yawns too, “me too, jagi,”
You hum softly, fingers slipping under the edge of his shirt just to feel a little skin, “I like that,” you murmur, “I like you,”
“I like you too,” He chuckles, “now go to sleep,”
A piece of you wants to protest, wants more time cocooned in this day with him, but something about his body feels so right. After a week of sleeping poorly, your body tight and anxious and heart fluttering for no reason at all, when he touches you, your mind goes blissfully blank.
Your muscles relax, your breath dropping low and soft in your chest.
Nuzzled against his tattoo, you drift.
You’re supposed to wake up to an alarm. Early enough that you could slip back into your hotel room and your own bed to yawn and stretch next to Iseul and make her believe you were there the whole night. That’s what was supposed to happen.
Instead, you wake to the heavy sound of a hotel door and Seonghwa’s voice, Yunho jolting awake beside you.
“Oh my god,” Seonghwa says for what sounds like the third time to your fuzzy sleep-addled brain, “oh my god?”
“Hyung,” Yunho pushes himself up, his arms unwinding from around you, “hey, don’t freak out,”
“Don’t freak out,” Seonghwa’s eyes blow wide, “are you fucking kidding me? Hongjoong is going to kill you,”
“You don’t understand,” Sleep is still heavy on him and he shakes his head to try to pull himself away.
“I understand plenty,” Seonghwa counters, “how long have you been lying to us?”
His reaction surprises you, and you ease yourself up to sit next to Yunho. You’re not sure what to say or not say, you don’t know what they’ve discussed in the past when it comes to dating and relationships, but by Seonghwa’s outburst you can guess it’s honesty at a minimum.
Yunho’s face falls, “No, it’s not that,”
“I can tell you what it looks like,” Seonghwa lowers his voice to what amounts to a stage whisper.
“Hyung,” Yunho rubs his eyes, running a hand through his mop of black hair.
“It looks like you’ve been sneaking around,” He continues, “how long have you two been fucking?”
“Hey,” Yunho’s voice sharpens, and his hand crosses your body to anchor on your opposite thigh.
Seonghwa’s eyes track it and he shakes his head, “This is so stupid,” he steps back in surprise, “you’re both being so, incredibly stupid.”
Yunho gives you a squeeze and opens his mouth to reply but Seonghwa keeps going.
“Naive is what it is,”
Irritation bubbles in your gut and you can’t stop yourself, “Seonghwa, will you shut up for one second?”
He stops in his tracks, mouth falling open, “What?”
“Can you please,” You hold his gaze, “please, just listen to Yunho for a minute before you jump to conclusions.”
He shifts, taking a step back and crossing his arms, and then he looks to Yunho.
Yunho finds your eyes quickly, silently asking, and you give him a nod.
“Okay,” Yunho runs a hand through his hair again, “I’ll just say it.”
Seonghwa waits, his expression completely neutral except for the irritated corner of his lips.
“y/n is my soulmate,” Yunho squeezes your thigh again and you slip your hand into his to twine your fingers together, “we didn’t know, but now we do.”
Seonghwa’s brows go high, shock filling his features.
“We’re not hiding,” You add, “we just… it’s just,”
“How long?” Seonghwa manages.
“Soundcheck yesterday,” Yunho says, “we haven’t known long enough to lie, hyung.”
“You’re sure?” He looks between you both, and you know what he’s thinking. How could it be possible to know each other for years and not know.
“We’re sure,” You answer confidently, calmly, “I swear,”
“It’s real,” Yunho’s thumb strokes across knuckles, “it’s very real.”
Seonghwa swallows, taking in the news and sinks back against the hotel dresser, “Well, fuck,”
“Yeah,” Yunho laughs.
“You were off timing yesterday,” Seonghwa points out, “and distracted,”
“It wasn’t that bad,” Yunho grimaces.
“No, but,” He shrugs, “I know you and you’re never off time.”
“It wasn’t easy to focus on the show yesterday,” Yunho admits.
“I’m sorry,” You nudge him with your shoulder, knowing a huge portion of that must have been the panic flooding his side of the link.
He shakes his head, “There’s nothing to be sorry for,”
When you look back up, Seonghwa is smiling and he sighs, “Oh, you’ve both got it bad.”
“Obviously,” You hide your face in your sweatshirt sleeve.
“So, what’s the plan?” Seonghwa asks, “Because you can’t act like this around anyone else,”
Your mouth feels dry.
“We don’t know,” Yunho answers, “we have to figure that out, for now I think we just try to keep things normal.”
Seonghwa nods and then leans forward, “Listen, I know you’re not asking for my advice,”
You both wait.
“But you're my brother,” Seonghwa says unequivocally, “so I’m going to give you some anyway.”
Yunho nods.
“You wear your heart on your sleeve,” Seonghwa points out, “and I’m sure it will be hard to act like acquaintances in front of everyone, but you have to do it, at least until you make a plan.”
“Yeah,” Yunho’s cheeks are a little pink and he squeezes your hand.
“No one fires the idol for things like this,” He reminds you both, “so for her sake, put it away for today.”
“He’s right,” You nod, “today we go back to coworkers,”
Yunho draws your clasped hands up and kisses your fingers, “Okay,”
“You’re lucky I offered to check on you,” Seonghwa sighs heavily, “if any of the managers came in,”
“Check on me?” Yunho perks up at that, “Hwa, why,”
Things come into focus for you at that moment, how bright the hotel room is with sunlight, how well rested you really feel. You twist in the bed and look at the digital clock, “Oh no,”
“You were late,” Seonghwa explains, “we figured you overslept, I offered to use the spare key to get you up.”
“Fuck,” Yunho curses.
You both slept straight through Yunho’s alarm.
“Iseul is going to fucking kill me,” You roll out of bed, your hands breaking apart as you scramble for you phone, “what the hell am I going to tell her?”
Your phone reads nine-thirty. In thirty minutes you’re supposed to be packed into a van and on the way to the venue and when you look at the collection of notifications your stomach churns.
Three calls from Iseul, and a lengthy string of text messages.
Did you already get up and get ready?
Your work bag is still here…
Not funny, girl, where are you?
Did you make it back last night?
Can you answer me??
I’m getting worried. I haven’t heard anything - You haven’t even read these?
You better not be dead in a ditch, I’ll kill you myself.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Your hands are trembling as you tap out the fastest reply - Alive, be right there.
Yunho’s a whirlwind behind you, stripping out of his sleep clothes and yanking on whatever outfit is at the top of his suitcase, “It’s fine, it’s going to be fine,”
“Sure,” You search the floor for your jeans and dart into the bathroom, “my best friend is going to murder me though,”
You change at lightning speed, swapping his sweats for your jeans and then tying up your hair into a messy bun before pushing back out into the main room.
“Everyone’s downstairs,” Seonghwa offers, “you shouldn’t run into anyone on the way back to your room.”
“Good, okay, good,” Your heart is pounding, “where’s my room key?”
“Here,” Yunho darts forwards and finds the little envelope, passing it to you, “take a breath,”
“I have to go,” You manage, “I have to think of something,”
“Don’t kiss and tell,” Seonghwa offers and he’s being funny but it’s vaguely helpful.
“Wait,” Yunho grabs your hand and tugs you back, snapping your phone out of your hand.
“Yunho, I don’t,” You start to say but he waves you off.
He types fast, adding himself as a contact in Kakao Talk, “My number,” he explains.
Seonghwa huffs a laugh.
You take the phone back and tuck it into your pocket, “I’ll message you later,”
“Good,” He dips forwards and presses one warm, tender kiss to your lips, “now get out of here,”
You kiss him back, just once and fast, a little shred of self indulgence before you have to act like he’s just another guy, and then you’re darting out of the room, shouting back a thank you at Seonghwa as you go.
You navigate the halls fast, and opt to take the stairs to get down one floor faster and more inconspicuously. You take a deep breath when you get to your hotel door, and then you dive.
“So you are alive,” Iseul’s waiting, just like you thought she might be. She’s sitting on your still made bed, her phone in her hands and a tense expression on her face, “I was just about to tell the managers you were missing,”
“I’m so sorry, seriously, I didn’t mean to worry you,” You take a few steps into the room.
Her eyes flick over you, and you realize at the moment her eyes widen that you’re still wearing Yunho’s hoodie, your sweater still discarded on his bedroom floor.
“You hooked up with someone?” Her voice spikes, “Are you kidding me?”
Thankfully the hoodie is plain, just a heather gray with no identifying attributes that scream his name, but you’re still swimming in it and it’s clear you’re rumpled from bed.
“Listen,” You hold up your hands, “I didn’t mean to not text you, I just fell asleep,”
“With some guy?” She stands.
“Yes,” You settle on some version of the truth.
“Who?” She flounders, “We’re supposed to text each other,”
And you always did, when either one of you went home with someone there was always a little preemptive safety report. A name, an address, a shared location, something so that you weren’t completely alone in the world with a strange guy.
“I’m sorry,” You say again.
She studies you, and it’s like she’s looking through you.
“Oh my god,” Her eyes widen, “we know him.”
“Iseul,” Your cheeks heat.
She points at you, “I’m right!”
“It’s not a big deal,” You skirt around her words.
“The only reason you wouldn’t text me is if you were with someone we both know,” She narrows her eyes, “so give it up.”
“I can’t,” You press, “leave it,”
“Why are you being so weird?”
“Iseul,” You sigh, avoiding her gaze, “I just woke up in a panic, and I have like fifteen minutes to get showered, can you give me the third degree later?”
“I’m not letting this go,”
“Yeah,” You pull off Yunho’s sweatshirt and head to the bathroom, “I know, but we have work.”
“Work with a coworker you slept with,” She stands in the doorway while you start the shower, and you realize her tone isn’t so much as angry anymore but probing.
“I didn’t sleep with him,” You groan, “well, I guess I did, but we didn’t have sex, okay?”
“That’s awfully cozy for a one night stand,” She crosses her arms, “unless you’re seeing someone? Are you seeing someone?”
“No,” You test the water heat and unbutton your jeans, “I swear I’ll explain another time, but can you just drop it for today? Or do you want to stand here and watch me shower?”
“Fine,” She concedes, “you will tell me?”
“I swear,” You nod, “I want to tell you, but I’m not ready yet, okay?”
Her eyes soften up at that, “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” You nod, “but I’m having big feelings about it and I need to work it out,”
“Oh,” In all the years you’ve known her, she’s never seen you in love or even close, and she just blinks, “got it,”
“Can I shower now?” You gesture towards the running water.
“Yeah,” She steps back, “yeah, but I’m still mad you didn’t text me.”
“Okay,”
“And I’m still going to guess who it is,” She smirks.
“Fine,”
Her smile widens and she rolls her eyes, “I bet it’s one of the BB guys, isn’t it? You always like a dancer,”
She turns the corner before she can watch you blushing harder, so nearly on the money with her guess, but you put it all out of your mind for now and focus on your day. You’re late, and it’s about to be another long one. You’ll have time for everything else later, if you can just keep your cool.
Work is bizarre to say the least. You and Yunho both do an excellent job of not looking at each other except for when he’s in your makeup chair, and you’re getting better and better at ignoring both San’s and Seonghwa’s nervous glances.
This time you start the makeup early, less time pressure with the schedule adjustments, and the night goes off without a hitch. Soundcheck to stage to VIP benefits, it’s a whirlwind and you’re grateful for the distractions everywhere you look.
You can still feel him, emotions from his side of the link ebbing and flowing throughout the day, but the sharp intensity of yesterday has dulled a bit after your night together. In quiet moments you find yourself thinking about his lips, or the way his hands held you as you tumbled into sleep, but you push it down and stay professional.
As the show ends, Iseul ropes you into team dinner, desperate to observe who you interact with and how, still on her quest to find your mystery bed partner, but the boys aren’t there and so there’s nothing for her to really see.
Later, with Iseul passed out from one too many shots of soju, you slip back into Yunho’s hoodie and cuddle into the warmth of your own bed. You need more sleep, you know that, but your brain isn’t cooperating. You toss and turn in the sheets, body feeling like a taut cord, and all you can think of is him.
You miss him.
It’s not even two days of having him in your life like this and you feel nervous and achy without him. There’s no way you’ll survive two years of this.
Over an hour passes as you sigh, changing positions again and again, and then your phone finally buzzes. You scramble to see if it’s a message from him, nearly dropping your phone in the process.
Can’t sleep? - He must be feeling your restlessness.
Not at all - You reply, chest feeling warm at the contact.
Little bubbles pop up immediately to indicate he’s typing and then another message pops on your screen - You’d think after last night we’d both be exhausted.
So you’re as awake as I am?
Just can’t relax. I liked having you here last night. - He confesses.
You roll over in the bedding onto your front and push the pillow under your chest before you keep texting - I liked it too. I’d come up except Iseul wouldn’t lay off guessing who I was with this morning.
Oh? Did she guess correctly? - You can practically see the smirk on his face.
Nope - You tease back.
Was she upset? - He asks.
At first, but I told her I would tell her soon I just needed some time - You reply.
That’s good, honest. - His message makes you smile.
How was Seonghwa? - You tap out.
Fine…. stressing and acting like a hyung, you know - He says.
You smile and type out another message - Is he keeping this to himself for now?
Yes - Yunho’s message comes in, and then another - For now, he knows we need to decide things first.
That’s good - You send back.
Things lull for a moment, and you try to think of something more to say, but Yunho swoops in with a question that makes you bite your lip to keep from laughing - Who did Iseul guess you were with? Was I even on the list?
I thought you’d be happy she didn’t guess - You reply.
Bubbles appear immediately, then another message - I’m a little offended, I’m the obvious choice.
Why’s that? - You tease him.
You feel something warm in your chest, and his next message flies back - I thought I was your type?
You stifle another laugh - You are, she’s not very observant.
So who did she guess?
Your belly flip flops and you hide your face in the pillow for a moment. His obvious jealousy, even just to tease you, is making your heart quicken and you can’t stop yourself from making it harder on him.
You take a breath and reply - About half the BB crew and a few of your managers.
The replies don’t come for a moment, and you nervously refresh the chat.
Finally a message comes in - I’m trying to think of something funny to say, but I’m actually just irrationally jealous.
She was just teasing, no need to be jealous - You smile into your hand.
Doesn’t matter - He says - Now I’m just here alone wondering which of our coworkers Iseul thinks you have chemistry with
He is jealous. You swallow hard, trying to ignore the swooping sensation in your belly and press your legs a little tighter together. If you close your eyes you can feel the echo of his hands on you from last night, and all you want in the world is for him to come down here and kiss you hard like that again.
With a slow exhale you return to your phone - Don’t be jealous, Yunho. We both know I’m yours.
Yeah? - His reply comes after a beat - No need to be jealous then.
Exactly - You reply.
I bet you like it a little though - His message flies in as yours sends.
You feel warm all over and you run a nervous hand through your hair before replying - No, I don’t.
Jagi, you forget I can feel how worked up you’re getting.
Your stomach clenches, drops and twists. He’s going to be the death of you and you’re still just flirting.
You work up the courage and finally send your reply - You’re the one that pinned me to the wall last night.
I’ve been thinking about that all day - The message reply is fast.
You smile and bite your lip, snuggling further into the mattress and trying to ignore the growing pulse between your thighs - You did seem distracted during rehearsals.
You feel warmth in your chest, and you know exactly how much your flirting is affecting him. Another text pings through and you shiver when you read it - How could I not be distracted with you there? All I could think about was the way you said my name last night.
Your thighs press together - Yunho?
Yes, jagi?
Or more whiny, was it? Yunho-ya? - You type it out fully, emphasizing the extended sound, knowing exactly what he wants to hear from the way he gripped you last night.
The room is suddenly hot, and your heart beats faster to sync with his.
It takes a moment for him to respond, bubbles popping up and then receding again and you wonder how he’s lying in bed. If he’s hard already, if he’s palming himself? You wonder if he sleeps naked when he’s alone and youre core clenches, arousal pooling in your gut and you know he can feel the threads of it. When he finally presses send on his message you have to cover your mouth to keep quiet.
Feeling needy? Are you squirming around in that hotel bed wishing for me, sweetheart?
You feel that message from your top to your toes and you steal a fast glance at the bed next to you. Iseul is sound asleep, turned away from you and snoring softly, and you let out a relieved, shuddering breath.
You could pump the brakes here, tease him and find a way to say goodnight, but you simply can’t. Need and arousal overwhelms you and you tap back your reply fast - I’ve been aching all day.
Do you have headphones?
The question catches you off guard, but you write back - Yes, airpods.
Put them in - He says, and you swallow tightly, reaching for the little headphone case on your bedside table.
Your fingers are shaking as you take them out of the case and put them in, making sure they’re connected before you reply - Done.
His call lights up your phone, ringing in your headphones and you swipe to answer with a panicked glance at the bed next to you, but Iseul sleeps on, none the wiser.
“y/n?” His voice is so rich and quiet, a little raspy edge after singing all night and you nearly moan.
“Hi,” You whisper as soft as you can, “I can’t,”
“Don’t talk,” He soothes you, “don’t wake Iseul up, I’ll talk to you and you can text me back, okay?”
You minimize the call and open your chat back up, sending him a quick emoji to acknowledge his words.
“Perfect,” He laughs softly, “this is way easier than texting. Listen, I know we said slow, but I’d love to help you relax if you want that. If not, I can just say goodnight, it’s up to you.”
You exhale softly, a needy thrill in your gut - Let’s relax together.
“Oh,” He sighs pleasantly, “yes, I’d love that.”
You want me? - You ask.
“You can feel how much I do,” He responds, “I’m sitting here convincing myself not to come downstairs and get my hands on you.”
You hum softly, shifting in the sheets and relaxing deeper into the pillows.
You hear his own breath, the way he parts his lips with a wet sound, “Can you tell me what position you’re in?”
You tap out the reply - Lying on my front, on my stomach.
“Hmm,” He sounds pleased, “I bet you look so cute, all twisted up in the sheets and blushing,”
I was tossing and turning.
“I bet you were,” He groans a little, “I tried everything. I hit the gym, cold shower, did some deep breathing, but you have me so keyed up I can’t sleep,”
You send him another emoji, the blushing face.
He laughs, the rumble of it too deep and warm in your ear with your headphones in.
You tap out another message - What position are you in? Trying to picture it.
You hear him shift around in the sheets, “I’m on my back,”
Wearing?
He chuckles, “Aren’t I supposed to be the one asking what you’re wearing?”
I asked you first.
“Fair,” He shifts again, and you picture him restless on his back in the bed you shared the night before, “just boxers,”
A heavy sigh passes through your lips.
“And you?”
You wish it were sexier all of a sudden, but that just wouldn’t be practical in a room with your friend so you tell him honestly - Pajamas, the button down kind, they’re gray.
“God, you’re adorable,” The covers on his end shift again, “wish you were up here with me.”
Me too
“This is probably better,” He says though, “I don’t think I could hold myself back for another night.”
Me either - You confess.
“y/n,” His voice warms, low in his chest, “jagiya, can I help you? Can I tell you what I want you to do?”
Your hands are shaking and you type the reply so fast there’s a typo that you have to fix - Pfease - Please.
He chuckles, “Alright, get comfortable, just listen to my voice, okay?”
You message him one last thought - What about you?
“I’m… I’m, uh,” He lets out a shaky breath, “I’m already stroking for you,”
You press your lips together to keep from making a sound, dropping your forehead to the pillow in front of you.
That’s so hot - You text him quickly when you hear him say your name, probably a little nervous he came on too strong.
He hums, “Good,” he says, “then don’t worry about me, just listen to my voice.”
You set your phone to the side, snuggling into the mattress and the pillows just like he asked for, sparing one more glance at Iseul to confirm she’s still completely out of it.
“Comfy?” He asks when you stop shifting around.
“Mhm,” You murmur in a whisper.
“Good,” He sighs, “now slip one of your hands under your cute little pajamas, between your thighs.”
You slide your arm down, tucking it under your body and into your sleep pants.
“Under your panties too,” He says, his voice a little husky.
“Mhm,” You murmur again, following his words.
“Tease a little for me,” He instructs you, “not too fast, just your fingertips on the outside,”
You breathe low and slow, gently passing the pads of your fingers over your slit, just barely ghosting against the hard nub of your clit.
“I bet you look so pretty right now,” He groans a little and you hear the sound of sheets, “you make the cutest faces when you’re feeling good,”
You make the tiniest noise of acknowledgement, fingers still brushing your cunt.
“Can’t wait to see you fall apart for real,” He confesses, a strain in his tone as he sighs, and you picture him. His long legs spread wide in the bed, stretching from corner to corner, his boxer briefs pushed down and his hand fisting his cock.
You’re going to lose it when you finally get to touch him again.
“You can touch now,” He murmurs, getting your attention back, “are you wet?”
You push your fingers through your folds and sigh when you feel just how slick and swollen you are. With your other hand you find the phone nearby and tap out a quick message - So wet
“That’s good, that’s so good,”
Your fingers start to circle on your oversensitive nub and there’s no way he won’t have you coming in five minutes or less with it feeling this good and his heavy breath in your ear.
“R-rub your clit for me,” He pants and your eyes roll, you can hear the sounds of the sheets rhythmically swishing as he pumps his cock harder, “get your fingers nice and wet,”
You whimper into the pillow, biting down hard on your cheek to keep yourself in check.
“Oh, fuck,” He groans, “sound so pretty,”
You rub harder, faster, your legs stretching wide under the downy comforter to give you better access.
“Baby,” He gets your attention with that, “push two fingers inside yourself, imagine I’m there with you,”
You shift, hand slipping lower and body arching to slide your middle and ring finger as deep as they’ll go. You stay mostly quiet this time, but your breathing is heavy and you’re sure he can hear it.
“Close your eyes,” He murmurs, “picture my fingers,”
You gasp softly.
“Grind,” He tells you, “grind your pussy on my palm and feel my fingers fucking you,”
You bite back a moan, only the slip of a soft sound into the microphone as you start to rock, rolling your hips and working your clit against your hand as you sink into his fantasy. You always took him for soft, the romantic type who’d blush at saying the word ‘pussy’ let alone talking you through what’s bound to be the headiest orgasm of your life, but you’ve never been so happy to be wrong.
“Yes,” Yunho moans and you shudder, “I can hear you moving, you’re doing so good,”
Pleasurable stars burst behind your eyes and you grind harder into your slick palm.
“So good,” He groans and you hear him roll in the bedding, his voice changing to something lower and breathier, and then the rhythmic rock of sheets from his side of the phone tells you all you need to know. You can almost see it, Yunho braced on his forearms, hips thrusting to drive his cock in and out of his hot fist, his face buried in the pillow you slept on the night before.
Heat melts through you, your body alight, and you grapple to find the phone again - Close
“Already?” He says in a flushed exhale, “You’re so hot, that’s so hot,”
You need him to talk to you, you need him to tell you what to do, and you whimper into the bedding as you work your body faster up to the peak.
“You gonna come for me?” He murmurs, “Yeah? Hmm?”
You drop the phone and press a hand over your lips, stifling the threat of a real moan.
“Let go,” His voice is so low in your ear you can practically feel the warmth of his breath on your skin, “come for me,”
Your legs are trembling, knees digging into the mattress and sweat gathered on your brow, and you feel the pressure start to crack open inside you, “Coming,” you whimper into your fingers so he knows, and then it breaks.
“God, good girl, yes,” He groans, “I’m coming with you, fuck,”
Your body curls into itself as you release, locking up in pleasure as you feel wave after wave of heat. You bite down on your knuckle to keep from making a sound, silently falling apart, dimly aware somewhere in your gut that half the heat you felt was his, that part of that pleasure was his own.
Yunho moans in your ear as you ride the sensations, panting and cursing and you can’t wait to feel him pulsing inside you while he sounds this good.
You’re not sure how long it takes you to recover, but when your brain starts to connect again you realize you’re panting against the cool flat of the mattress and both your phone and pillow are nowhere to be found. You swallow hard and pop your head up, but Iseul hasn’t moved an inch and you thank god for her liberal use of melatonin while traveling.
In your ear you register the sound of Yunho’s breath and the end of a sentence, “still there?”
He must have been talking, and you try to focus in on the sound of him now as you slip your hand out from between your sticky thighs.
He exhales slowly and you hear him shifting around, “y/n, baby, are you there?”
“Uh-huh,” You manage.
“Sleepy?” He murmurs, misreading your sound, “That’s okay,”
You make a tiny noise of protest and search the bed for your phone.
“Baby?” He’s confused and you grin at his sleepy sated tone.
Sliding off the bed onto nearly boneless legs, you find your pillow off to the side and your phone underneath. You snap it up and send a message quickly - Wait
“Wait?” He breathes, “Sure, I’m not going anywhere, I’m here,”
You tiptoe to the bathroom as quietly as you can and then shut yourself behind the heavy door, flicking on the light and collapsing to sit on the closed toilet lid.
You disconnect your earbuds and bring your phone to your ear, “Hey,”
“Hey,” He murmurs, “you okay?”
“Yeah,” You smile, still a little breathless, “Hiding in the bathroom for a sec so I could actually talk to you,”
He hums, a quiet, lazy laugh, “Ah,”
“Are you okay?” You find yourself asking, a little nervous tumble in your gut.
“Me?” He says, “I’m incredible, you’re incredible,”
“Yeah?” You draw your knees up, wrapping your arms around yourself and smiling into the phone.
“That wasn’t too much, was it?” He checks, but you still hear the sound of him calling you ‘good girl’ and you shiver.
“Not too much,” You sigh into the phone.
“Good,” He hums, “I thought so, I was trying to pay attention to how you were feeling, but it was a little,”
“Hard to focus?” You offer and he laughs.
“Yeah,” He sighs again, heavy and sated.
“I can’t wait for this tour to be over,” You confess, “I just want to be with you,”
You feel a pang in your chest and listen as Yunho rolls in the sheets, “I know, I want that too,”
A little lump forms in your throat and you breathe through it, “Yunho,”
“Yeah, baby?”
“Have you ever felt like this before?” Your thundering heart has started to slow, and you let your eyes close as you murmur the question.
“Never,” He murmurs, “but I felt this way before we touched,”
You feel his tenderness wrap around your heart as if he were in the room with you, and with a small smile you whisper, “I thought you said you weren’t holding a candle?”
“I lied,” He says softly, “it’s been you for a long time,”
He doesn’t say it, not in so many words, but you feel the way he loves you through the link in a wave. It’s as good as any confession to you, just as honest if not more so.
“I wish I could come upstairs,” You manage, tears pricking your eyes.
You hear him swallow and breathe a slow breath through his nose, “Soon, I promise. We’re going to do this right,”
“I know,”
“Are your headphones still in?” He asks
“No, but I can switch back,”
“Put them back in and go get back in bed,” He softly instructs, “it’s late, but I’ll stay with you until you fall asleep, okay?”
“Okay,” You swap back over to your earbuds and adjust them.
“Get back to bed,” You can hear the smile in his voice.
“Yunho,” You interrupt him, “thank you for staying with me,”
“Always,” He says, and for the first time in your life when someone says they’ll be there, you believe it.
“I’m going back out,” Your voice drops to a whisper, “good night,”
“Mhm,” He listens as you slip back into bed, “just get comfortable, just breathe. I’m right here with you, jagiya, I’ll be right here.”
He murmurs to you softly until your mind is sinking into darkness, body finally unspooling and letting you drop off into sleep. It’s not the same as his arms around you, but it settles you more than any meditation, his voice a steady whisper through your dreams.
In the morning when you wake the call is still connected and the first sound you hear is his slow breath and the steady beat of his heart.
#yunho#jeong yunho#honeyhotteoks fic#yunho x reader#yunho fic#yunho ff#yunho smut#yunho fluff#ateez#ateez fic#ateez ff
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Your funeral (pt. 1)
hi!! can i pls order bacon with onion in a bowl mikes way, thank you <333
max verstappen x riccardo!sister
My heart is only yours to break
A/N: this will be two parts, I get carried away writing for Max, lmao. So the bolded line and smut will be in pt. 2, sorry not sorry 😘
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Australia 2024
Max last saw you in the paddock in the summer of 2018 following your high school graduation. He had known you for two years, being Daniel’s teammate, and found you shy compared to your older brother. He was 21 then, so the two of you didn’t really talk that much, and he just thought of you as “Danny Ric’s sweet little sister.”
Six years later, he barely recognized you. You’d let your hair grow out, your muscles were more toned and defined, and it seemed like you’d become the queen of yapping. He had spent 10 minutes creepily watching you from the garage as you talked with Yuki, trying to figure out who you were. It all made sense when he watched Daniel appear, pulling you into a hug. Max blushed when he realized it, trying to shove down all the thoughts he was just having about the mysterious hot girl in the RedBull garage.
Daniel waved him over after spotting him, and Max made his way over to the group. Your eyes were shining as he approached, excited to see an old friend, and you pulled him into a hug to greet him. He was caught off guard at first but wrapped his arms around you in return, breathing in your ocean-scented perfume.
“It’s good to see you, Max; it’s been so long!” you cheerfully said to the Dutch man.
“I know. What has it been, six years?” He asked, even though he already knew the answer. He needed to pull himself together.
“Yeah, I think so,” you replied. Yuki and Daniel were called off to RB, leaving you alone with Max, who seemed a little nervous.
“So what brings you back?” He asked.
“Finally have the time off work,” you said. “I stopped coming while I was in school so I could focus on my studies, and then every summer, I had an internship so I couldn’t come to any of those races. Then I got a job right after graduation in St. Tropez, and it’s been so busy but so good. I get to do what I love and the town is so beautiful. I’m a marine biologist, so I always knew I’d get to call some coastal town home.”
You finished talking breathlessly, and Max looked at you with wide eyes.
“I think that’s more words I’ve ever heard from you than in those two years when Daniel and I were teammates,” he teased, and you blushed.
“I was like 16, Max,” you huffed, and he laughed.
“Are you coming to more races this season?”
“I hope so. Since I’ve been with this company for two years, I have a little more allowed time off,” you told him.
“It’ll be good for Daniel to have you around,” he said, your heart squeezed, thinking about how rough it’s been for your brother the past couple of years.
“You’ve been a good friend to him,” you replied softly, bringing your hand to squeeze his. His face flushed and you were amused by the power you seemed to have over “Mad Max.”
Later, Max walked towards his driver's room after debriefs when Daniel caught up with him.
“So my sister is back,” Daniel said, and Max continued, not looking at his friend.
“So she is,” he replied simply.
“I saw how you were looking at her,” Daniel said firmly. “Don’t make me say it.”
“You don’t have to say anything,” Max said, turning to Daniel with his signature smile. “Off-limits.”
Daniel nodded, still eyeing him but letting him go into the room.
Miami 2024
Since Australia, Max had followed you on Instagram and you had quickly followed him back, which led you down a rabbit hole of what he had been up to in the past couple of years. You weren’t the only one that had glowed up.
Your company had an office in Miami, so you flew out the week of the race to tour the facility and watch your brother in action. On Friday morning, you were walking through the hotel lobby on your way to the beach when you ran into Max.
“Hey!” You said brightly as you caught up with him.
“Y/n,” he said, greeting you. You didn’t miss the way his eyes dragged down to your chest, where your bikini was visible under your see-through coverup. “Headed to the beach?”
“Yeah, I figure a day laying out in the sun will do me good,” you replied.
“I’m sure it will.”
“Too bad you can’t come with me.” You said, subtly testing the waters, trying to determine if your interest was even slightly mutual. Max’s gaze was intense in your eyes, and you could tell he was fighting an internal battle.
“Don’t flirt with me, y/n. It’s not allowed,” he said sternly, which made you smile wider.
“Who said I’m flirting with you?” You replied, and he rolled his eyes.
“I see how you look at me like I’m a piece of meat,” he teased, and you laughed out loud.
“You’re the one who was literally staring at my tits five minutes ago,” you replied, and he slapped his hand over your mouth, looking around.
“Don’t say that schatje; your brother has eyes everywhere,” he said seriously, and your eyes crinkled in amusement. “I’ll see you later.”
Daniel's race did not go well, finishing in P15. You could feel the disappointment radiating off him when he got out of the car and your heart sank. You knew he would try to mask his pain with happiness for Lando getting his first win, but you saw right through it.
Don’t get me wrong. You were ecstatic for Lando, having met him when Daniel was at McLaren. The two of you were the same age, so you got along easily. Admittingly, you did shed a few tears when he crossed the finish line, but your heart ached for your brother.
He was silent when he met you after the debrief, and you launched into a very long story about a shark you were tracking off the coast to try and distract him. You hit the 7-minute mark, and things were finally starting to get interesting when Daniel laughed loudly out loud, looking over at you.
“I love you,” he said, and you smiled, moving into his arms.
“I love you too Danny,” you told him.
“No more sadness today, let’s celebrate Lando,” he said, determined, and you grinned.
Lando was already fucked up when you guys made it to the club that night. You hadn’t seen him after the race yet, so he picked you up and twirled you around when he saw you.
“I’m so proud of you buddy,” you told him and he smiled.
“Okay, then buy me a shot,” he replied and you giggled.
“You make so much more money than I do,” you complained teasingly. He pulled out his wallet, handing you his card.
“Just use my card for the night.”
You were at the bar waiting on the shots when you felt a presence behind you, a hand casually settling on your lower back.
“I’m surprised Daniel let you leave the hotel wearing that,” Max said in your ear, causing chills to flare up all over your body. Your red dress was tight on your body, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t thinking about catching someone’s attention.
“Hmm, so that means you like it,” you smirked, turning to step into him.
“You are going to be the death of me,” he murmured, and you shot him a wicked grin.
“Then get your affairs in order,” you replied before grabbing the tray of shots and moving back to the group. Max followed close behind you, congratulating Lando when you both reached him. You watched your brother narrow his eyes as he looked from you to Max, and you gave him an innocent smile.
Many drinks later, you danced in the crowd a respectable distance away from Max. That didn’t stop him from openly watching you the whole time, though.
“What’s up with you and Max?” Lando asked as you took a break from dancing.
“Nothing,” you said quickly and he gave you a look. “Nothing can happen.”
He nodded understanding, “You think Danny will kill him?”
“Most likely,” you said, sighing and looking back over to Max, who was talking to your brother funny enough. “His funeral, though.”
You excused yourself to go to the bathroom, and when you came back into the hallway, an arm shot out, grabbing you.
Max pulled you along to a darker area of the club with a tad more privacy. He stopped in the corner, moving you against the wall and leaving you no time to say anything before his lips were on yours.
It was a bruising kiss that had you feeling delirious, reaching up to tug his hair, which made him press up against you harder.
“Wearing that dress just for me hmm,” he said, pulling back before attaching his mouth on your neck, trying to leave a mark. You half tried to push him off but found yourself whimpering instead.
“Max, we can’t,” you said breathlessly. He finally let up, his lips puffy, as he looked at you with fire behind his eyes.
“I know, I just wanted to claim what was mine,” he said and you squeezed your legs together at his words. “Now, when all those guys keep looking at you in there, they’ll see my mark on your neck.”
“You are insane,” you said, amused but then panicked, thinking about your brother. “He’s going to kill me.”
“Maybe,” Max said. “That’s what you get for wearing that dress schatje, and he won’t know I did it. Your funeral.”
You knew drunk Lando probably blabbed immediately after you left him, and those words made that apparent.
Sure enough, when you made it back to the dance floor, your brother took one look at your neck and yanked you outside, lecturing you about kissing random men. If only he knew.
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If you were to have a threesome with Matt and Chris, who would you want to have from behind and who in your mouth and why
Oh, so I have a wildly specific answer for this. Lmao.
Chris from behind because I just know that he would beat it up so good, slapping my ass, pulling my hair, and degrading me the whole time. Also, I feel like he probably has incredible stamina and could make me cum over and over. 😩🙈
And Matt in my mouth because I'd wanna watch his facial expressions while I'm giving him head. Like could you imagine?? Matt Sturniolo looking down at you with that fucking smile on his face and his bedroom eyes. 😍 And I just know he'd be talking me through it the whole time, telling me what a good girl I am and caressing my face and shit. 💖💦
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Snow Angel
Chapter 1: elation
low to medium honor Arthur Morgan x Female Reader
Arthur has been living by himself, laying low (for real this time) somewhere in the Pacific Northwest. After the whole Pinkerton and Micah debacle, he has been hiding away, waiting for it all to blow over, occasionally getting letters from the people who still know that he's alive. He's been alone awhile and at first, he thought he could handle a little loneliness. He has been wrong before. Lucky for him, you look like the perfect thing to break up the monotony.
Warnings: dubious consent, low honor Arthur, smut, naive reader
WC: 2481
Hi, I’m unwell about him and I needed to post this bc I need people to talk to about it and I probably also need help lmao also may be a bit ooc. New to posting here 😳😖😵💫
Tags: innocence kink, size kink, vaginal and oral sex, no TB thank god. Arthur is sweet still but has mean tendencies obviously
Arthur’s new visitor has him hot under the collar.
The snow up here is about to overtake Lucky, the loyal Clydesdale you had known since you were a girl. His legs amble forward, winds whipping his mane and tail about. Hunkering over him; gripping his reins for dear life, you try to urge him further. Your throat is tight with nerves and of course the impending reality that Lucky has been slowing down. That the weather has only been getting worse since you started riding out. The last thing isn’t worth mentioning.
As if he could hear you over the blizzard winds, you clutch tight to his reins.
“Please Lucky, you can do it, boy. You can’t leave me here,”
His hooves trudge through the snow, his big legs managing to stay above the snow fall. He falters a bit here and there, more often as you go on. Grunting and shaking at his tack. You pat along his strong neck. The cold turns the moisture in the air to ice, the heat in his breath disappearing.
“I’m sorry, Lucky…” Shuffling onward, leading him on. Frost gathers over your coat and you would think the landscape beautiful if not for the lethality of it all. You’re not sure if people are meant to survive in places like this. With nose numb and fingers creaky in your thick gloves, you know you have to stop. Scanning the horizon for anything resembling a shelter, imagining yourself curled up in Lucky’s side, you can see the soft glow from a cabin a ways down the road. The only vestige of humanity you had seen for miles on what feels like the edge of the world. Windows glow with the tell tale orange of a warm fireplace. Your foot nudges into Lucky’s side for your last push, your last chance.
“Go!” you slap the reins on his neck, working him up to a trot. You approach and see what looks to be some sort of barn. It’s a small stable, a nice place to put a horse or two, maybe a dairy cow. Another horse lazily sleeps, fresh hay for his bedding. At your entrance, he perks up but stares oddly, easing back. Lucky knickers and snorts, just happy to be inside, you think.
“I’ll be back, hopefully not too soon…” You leave him there while he starts mooching the hay laid out for his new roommate. You pat his flank and watch the ice melt from his lashes.
Braced for the cold, arms crossed over your chest, you pull your legs forward through the snow outside. It’s a fight to get through the piles of snow, clouding around your lower thighs. Finally, you're on the wooden steps of the porch, which creak a bit underneath your feet. Panting, you meekly pat on the door.
“Please, I need help,” you shout, trying to speak over the blizzard. “Is anyone there?” You can hear the crackling fire, feeling like it’s warming you already. Heavy steps come to the door.
“Who’s out there?” A gruff masculine voice answers your call. It grates over your nerves, though if you weren’t alone you might have found it to be soothing. With any luck, he’s the father of a nice family whose heart would be softened by a lone young woman near frozen to death on his front door.
“Please, sir. I promise it’s just me,” your pleading seems to have done the trick and the man opens the door. Finally hitting you with a heat you had almost forgotten. He moves to the side after sizing you up. Hesitating even for a second causes him to dip his head to direct you inside. Forcing your stiff legs to lift. He takes a moment to analyze the gap you left behind. Carefully, he shuts the door and pulls the curtain closed. Maybe he had been robbed before? Lonely homesteads were easy and preferable targets for bandits. Typically neighbors were miles away, if you had any neighbors to speak of or to.
You get a better look at him, tall and strong, chest the size of a barrel. The sleeves of his plain white shirt are rolled up and the top two buttons are undone. Leather suspenders keep his deep brown trousers up. He stands as if unsure what to do with his body besides intimidate you with it, showing not an ounce of uncertainty on his face.
There is no one else here and if there is, they’re in the other rooms of his quiet and moderate home. The house smells of coffee, a disarming smell. Salt pork and boiled potatoes too. Certainly provisions that could last through this harsh winter.
“What the hell were you doin’ out there?” His tone is accusatory and judgemental. He must think you an idiot to be traveling in this weather and maybe he wasn’t all wrong. Instead of talking, your jaw clicks your teeth together. The hard look he gives you melts away and he helps you out of your coat. He's almost surprised to see you, eyes stuck on every piece of you revealed to him. Snowflakes and icy debris are shed from you and you sigh. You try your best to get your natural reactions to stop but they insist on ceasing on their own. The man huffs, stepping towards the percolator on the stove. You watch on, feeling strange that he hasn’t really invited you to sit or do much of anything else.
“You mute, girl? Asked you a question.” he takes a seat by the fire in a big chair seemingly made just for him. He sets down the coffee before taking a match and striking it, lighting the end of a cigarette he retrieved from the table. The coffee steams gently and you take it; seeing as you're very sure he had made it for you. Jerkily, you move to sit as he sets his eyes on you. The couch is soft and warm, homely with a pretty blanket, thick and colorful patterns. While his gaze seems easy and relaxed, he watches you like a hawk.
“No, I… was getting something for my granny. She’s not feeling too good. Ma sent me to get something for her. The doctor, I suppose. Didn’t make it too far,”
He exhales. The smallest noise of amusement.
“I can imagine,” You take a sip of the coffee. Warm and sweet smelling. “What kinda mother sends a pretty thing like you on a fool's errand? You really thought you was gonna bring your ol’ granny a doctor in this?” You stare, feeling a bit like a child being scolded by this man.
“Oh well, I-”
“Your granny probably already kicked the bucket while you were out here, damn near gettin’ yourself killed. If it weren’t for me, well…” scratching at the darker scruff that grows on his face. His hair is that same light brown, almost blond. He sucks the smoke out of the slim roll of paper. It's bitter and acrid, a contrast to the warm smoky fireplace. Your brows furrow. Deciding to change the subject before you say something out of turn, you take another sip out of the enameled cup he had given you. The smoke he inhaled releases in a cloud around his features, obscuring the knowing smile he wears.
“I’m sorry mister, but I don't think you gave me your name…” He ashes his cigarette, tossing his legs up on the table in the center of the room. The weight of him and his leather boots don’t rattle the table, he’s careful with himself.
“Arthur. You married?” His gaze is as hot and red as the cherry burning on the end of his cigarette. You almost start to feel uncomfortable. If there weren't a blizzard outside, you might consider walking out. He hadn’t even given you a chance to say your name. Your nervous look only seems to enthrall him more. You only now notice he’s looking at your hands but thick gloves still encase your fingers.
“No, I'm afraid not,” You contemplate telling him a lie but think about when you might have to remove your gloves. You’d rather not get caught in a fib. Though perhaps his rather brusque flirting might have come to an end should you have warned him of a man who would be looking after you. Being out here by yourself seems to have him convinced that no one truly was looking after you anyway.
“Young lady like you, unwed and caring for your Ma, Pa, all by yourself? Now that’s just sad, is what it is,” The butt of his cigarette meets its end in the ashtray on the table. Your face tweaks into a small nervy smile, nodding. “You are… a sight, for an old ugly bastard like me is all,” Your fingers start to twiddle, feeling your face warm, maybe because of the flames licking at the logs on the hearth. He’s certainly not the ugliest man you’ve ever seen nor the oldest, you frown at such an oddly self deprecating comment. You’re surprised he doesn’t already have a wife and several children running around, reading stories by the fireplace that you sit in front of. You revert back to old tactics.
“I left my horse in the stable out front, I hope you don’t mind too much,”
“Ain’t no trouble,” His hands seem to itch to be doing something, he also seems to twiddle his fingers. One hand propped over the arm of his chair.
“Why don’t I get you somethin’ dry to wear? Should be turnin’ in soon. Gettin’ late.” He stands, hands on his knees and then he’s going into the next room. It gives you a chance to evaluate the room you're in. The mantle has all sorts of strange little knick knacks, the walls, plenty of… distinctive hunting trophies and supplies. Several gleaming guns in different finishes are displayed proudly. Although pretty, they don’t seem unused. If anything, well loved and worn. You’re starting to feel every bit the lamb in the wolf’s den this man is already treating you as.
He comes out of the room, holding a pair of cotton long johns in a cream color. You’re not sure why he thinks you need them but he has been nothing but hospitable if not a bit too strong on his pleasantries and very blunt. It can be lonely out here in the country, so you offer a small smile. He stares at you, even as you awkwardly side step him and go to his bedroom. You close the door and sigh, nice to just have a moment to yourself. Away from the strange man and the cold. The warm smell of fabric and the natural musk of the wood calm you, along with the faint smell of something distinctive to him. You claw and peel at the layers of your clothing, riding gear and boots. You notice how wet your clothes are from the melting ice. Perhaps he knew better than you did.
You slip into the warm cotton of what must be his long johns. They’re nice and feel almost new. Far too big for you. That man, Arthur, did seem to be quite big. Here in the quiet room, you can remember the wind, the cut of the cold air against your cheeks, hear the wind rattle the glass. You're glad to be out of all of that.
It’s a rather modest room, a bed, an armoire, a nightstand, a cabinet. Cigarettes and a few cigars, several empty bottles of bourbon. Some old faded photographs but you're not so brave as to pick them up. The room is severely lacking in the touch of a woman department, bed pushed up against the wall. The smallest mirror adorns the wall, dusty and plain. You turn to the door and see him, standing there.
You startle and put your hand to your chest.
“You scared me Mister…” no last name to utter has you confused, he had never given you one. Your smile isn’t forced but it fades a little when you see him looking at you.
“Morgan, Arthur Morgan,” he’s really giving several once overs that feel like thrice overs, drinking you in like those bottles of bourbon. Your face feels hot again. He stares at the junction between your legs, up to your chest and then finally your face. You don’t think you've ever seen a man look at you like that; not that you spend very much time around men. The type of men at the saloons in town were no good for you, or at least that’s what Ma would say.
“Put somethin’ on the stove for ya, man can’t leave no woman hungry…” he puffs up in pride a bit, you tilt your head. Hopefully he hadn’t been watching you snoop around, or even worse, changing. You nod, a small gesture.
“Thank you, Mr. Morgan. I really appreciate your kindness,” he makes space for you to exit down the small hallway. You try not to brush against him but he’s so big, fills up the sparse room between you and the wall. He drops his arm on the door frame, making you pass underneath him. Looking up at him, you can make out the color of his eyes, a pretty summer blue. His shirt and suspenders smell clean and wintry. He makes you feel minuscule, a mouse and cougar. His features; squared and rugged from weathering the elements, are set in a stony expression but there’s excitement in his eyes.
“Been a long time since somebody called me a kind man, usually it was the opposite,” he says. His hands twitch again, the one in the door is a tight fist. You know that you can’t leave. And you wouldn’t beat him should he chase, you doubt you’d even make it to Lucky. Especially now that he insisted you put on his underclothes. The temptation to be in dryer clothes has trapped you here. You flinch as his hand descends to rest on your neck and collar, rubbing. His body moves forward, taking your silence as acceptance.
“Please, I-“
“I think you need a man to take care of you, honey, need a man to keep you inside- wouldn’t let you go out alone like this if you was my woman,” his hand squeezing at your shoulder, you don’t dare to move. Broad chested, he seems to block out all of the light from the meager lamps and the fireplace.
“Lemme show you how a man looks after a girl like you,” He eases off you and guides you down the hall, your heart thumping out of your chest. Certainly not because of the romance but the claustrophobic feeling of being alone with a man such as him, big and very strong in his advances. Thankfully, not too strong. Yet, a voice in your head warns.
If you made it, thanks for reading and pls send feedback 💝😭 I have split the chapter into 2 parts because it was way too long. I will be posting a "chapter 2" but chapter 3 will be chapter 2 for people who read the long version. I was just too excited to post it and didn't think about this LMAO
#arthur morgan x reader#red dead redemption 2 x reader#rdr2 x reader#low honor arthur morgan#tw dubcon#I’m insane I know#low honor arthur morgan x reader#arthur morgan x you#red writes#:v#read dead redemption 2 community#rdr2 community
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OML also have you read /heard of Desire for Peace? It’s an ongoing webcomic about Ares’ recovery from his time in the jar by @/ephemeral-roses. It’s only 3 episodes long so far but the WRITING and the ART and the EMOTIONS is gorgeous. plus I LOVE their Aphrodite so much !!
Okay so when you sent this ask I hadn't known anything about @ephemeral-roses Desire for Peace but upon reading it, I immediately bolted to read the available three chapters and stalk their tumblr a bit. Now that I've sat with what I read for a few hours, I can confidently say that I'm quite a fan!!
I've seen a modest amount of takes on the 'Ares recovers from his jarification' premise most notably in fics, but it's my first time seeing a spin on it that seems to be primarily concerned with Ares' mental health in the aftermath. Also the opening premise of Ares being born twice, first from his mother and then from the jars was like, very impacting to me, I'm extremely interested to see how that is expounded upon. It's also really cool to have Ares as an amputee? There are many many elements that are tying Ares to his brothers just in these first couple chapters - born twice like Dionysus with one birth involving them having to be repaired after being torn apart by monsters (Ares is mental but Dionysus/Zagreus was physical), disabled like Hephaestus and being accompanied by Hermes who, instead of acting like a psychopomp and delivering Ares to death, instead acted like a nursemaid and delivered Ares back to life.
Anyway, the point is, thank you very much for pointing me in the direction of this series!! I'll definitely be keeping an eye on it eagerly!!
#ginger answers asks#I promise I'm not ignoring your Kassandra asks btw I have MANY MANY MANY things to say about her#the problem is narrowing down the things I want to say about her lmao#but yeah no Desire for Peace seems cool as hell and I didn't even start talking about the art direction or character design#or visual depictions of Ares' struggles which are all stellar like wow wow wow#Also their Aphrodite is STUNNING#I just really love the direction they've taken in general with grounding this work in both time and space while still keeping that nebulous#almost dreamline atmosphere for myth intact#really impressive stuff#it gets two thumbs up from me easy#thank you so much for the recommendation!!
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i used to freehand comics all the time as a child and since the part i liked was the drawing part i would just draw panel after panel because i didn't want to stop drawing to think about icky icky words, plus the story TOTALLY still made perfect sense! to me! and noone else, but 'whoooo caaaaares omgggg its not like comics and sequantial art are a communicative meeediummmm lmaoooooo'. i spent my entire childhood telling myself stuff like "oh pfft I know this story by heart- ill SIMPLY remember the dialogue and write it later" ...and. I can't help but admire baby maiora's (call that a minora ba tm tsk) fucking audacity? hubris? confident wrongness? kid couldn't even remember to finish the comics in the first place? INCREDIBLE levels of unearned self assurance, wish that were me, genuinely- what an icon!!! anyway i think i have forever cursed myself
#maiora garrulates#the maiora overthinks the process of writing dialogue saga continues!!!!!!!#im so tired. i have been overthinking this shit in circles i have not been making any progress in any which way lmao!#im bitching and moaning for funsies this is not that serious in the Grand Scheme Of Things i just wanna improve at my fav thing#and ❤️ Unfortunately ❤️ my favorite thing in the world involves learning MY MOST HATED *NEMESIS*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! verbal communication. ew#words are fun! i LOVE words! toys!!!!! im using words right now and i didn't combust!!!!! wow look at that!!!!!!!!!!!!!#putting words in SEQUENCE? multiple times?? filtering THOUGHTS into SENTENCES???? sentences that a character would or wouldn't SAY???#AND THEN THERE'S ANOTHER CHARACTER SOMETIMES???? AND THAT BITCH ALSO HAS THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS????? AND THEY ALL HAVE PERSONAL IDIOLECTS#AND TONES THAT S U P P O S E D L Y ARE IMPLICATED BY MANNERISMS AND VERBAL HABITS AND CIRCUMSTANCES (AND THERE'S WRONG ANSWERS! ALSO!!)#AND THEY'RE IN A CONTEXT!! AND THEY'RE INTERACTING WITH EACH OTHER AND INFLUENCING EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#THE CONVERSATION COULD VARY GIVEN ENERGY LEVELS WHETER OR NOT SOMEONE'S FOOT IS FALLING ASLEEP THE F U C K I N G WEATHER#“oh dialogue is easy just say it out loud to yourself until it 'sounds normal' ^^”#screaming crying throwing up NONE OF THIS IS INTUITIVE TO MEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....!#ok dramatics over its out of my system! for now!!!#this is all easily explained bc i just. draw a lot more than i talk to people. so like. OBVIOUSLY i have more practice drawing#so drawing comes natural! talking does not! subsequently dialogue is Hard! No FUCKING Shit Sherlock!!!!! (affectionate)#so yeah. im using y'all (the tumblr void) as practice! hi!!! words at you!!!!!!!!!!#so yeah thanks for baring with me while passing by my corner of the internet#i do love self indulgence this is fun check out my navel gazing actually no do not look at my belly button#anyway i just think this is mildly interesting. some of my writer buds have the same “not good enough” allergy towards visuals#but they use it to be mean2me >:( same bitch that “omg i cant i suck at drawing i can't do this-” does the “uhm. just write? lol.” 2 meeee#we could have peace and love on planet earth and a common experience and yet you KICK miette for being bad at words!!!1!!! </3 heartbreak!!#what the fuck was i talking about even#oh yeah. perfectionism within creatives i guess. LMAO JK i am talking about NOTHIN!!!!G i am just putting Words Out Here ehehehehehe#its practice >;)c#all this bc ive been doodling comics for myself again and im V!! PROUD OF THE ART!!!! wanna share- but DIALOGUE!*⚡sfx!!*....... so! options#a) leaving it blank. no there are NO microphones in the budget. b) leaving blank *balloons* so that the Rythm is there. implied convo!!!#c) ...doing it badly. (tragic)(heartwrenching)(teeny tiny bruise 2 the ego) *dramatic single tear cleches fists * its the only way.........#...we shall see! literally none of this is all that serious i am procrastinating!! <3 playing with my tuoys!!!!!!!! silly time!!!#/all lh! am reaching 30 tags so that is all for THIS episode of the maiora bitches about dialogue saga thank you for joining me!!okilyBuhBY
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Hi. I've never done this before, but I've been eagerly reading everything since weekend started.
So if it's okey for me to ask I would love to request 💔💔🔥🔥🔥🥹🥹 ( hope it's not to much. I'm totally hooked on all of them but writing down every single emoji felt a bit crazy 😅)
🥰🥰🥰🥰 Please know I am bestowing the gentlest kiss to your temple and giving you the biggest hug! It is absolutely okay! (and I won't be mad if you wanna send in more or others asks for my stories!) 💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛
💔 icemav break up / icedad
this is directly continuing from this ask!
“No! Of course not! But come on, Ice, you have to see-” “I don’t have to see shit,” Tom explodes, cutting Mav off before he can start trying to justify his, and Carole’s as well most likely, actions. “You hurt him. Do you get that? Does she get that? Bradley is here. He is living and breathing and you both are hurting him.” Scoffing, Mav rolled his eyes as Tom continued on. “Do you have any idea what your actions almost did? You both almost drove him away! I’ve had to stop Bradley from running off to do it all on his own three, three goddamn times! And I’m the only one who’s shown him even an ounce of support, Pete, and he still keeps trying to run off and do it all on his own because he thinks he can’t trust me!”
🔥 virgin jake - hangster
“You confused me,” Bradley blurts out. “You confused me and enticed me and I didn’t know what I was feeling. What I was meant to be feeling the first time I laid eyes upon you.” Snapping his mouth shut, he turns his gaze away from Jake to stare down at the floor. Scoffing, Jake huffs at his half thought out explanation. But before he could open his mouth to call him on it, Bradley continued on. “I was raised knowing I would have a courtesan. I knew what that all entailed,” he powered on. “But then…but then I saw you. I saw who would be mine and I lost my damn mind. I know I did. I broke tradition because I could not bear the thought of anyone but me guarding you until you were officially mine.” Jake flinched back, eyes going wide in surprise as he stared at Bradley. “What? What do you mean broke tradition"?”
🥺 chap2 of helper - a/b/o hangster
“Sweetheart, come here,” the voice calls, soft and soothing and like a balm to the raw nerve Jake’s worked himself up into being. “That’s right baby, I got you, okay? Just listen to me, okay, Jake?” He thinks he nods or maybe he mumbles out a yes or noise of agreement. He’s not sure, not really but what he does know is that suddenly he’s not pressed against the cold unyielding side of his tub or bathroom floor. Suddenly he’s pressed against warmth. Wrapped up in it really. In warmth and love and feeling like he’s once again tethered to something. But that can’t be right, Jake thinks, because he’s not supposed to be wrapped up in warmth and love. Because he doesn’t deserve that after what he did to Bradley.
Make Nixie Write This Weekend!
#themysteryofmind-blog#make nixie write#nixie answers#icedad#one day ice will be listened to and heard. sadly it is not any time soon.#and bradley is definitely not doing good y'all#but like ice. one day he too shall be happy#my patron my heart#bradley really did just lose his mind when he first laid eyes on jake#broke tradition and gave no fucks because he was like only I. only ME and MYSELF and I can protect what is meant to be mine#boy is stupid but he's mostly just stupid for jake#and while jake isn't getting that or into yet#he will be#he will relish that this powerful vampire looses his damn mind over jake and will do anything#and everything to give jake whatever his heart desires#hangster#sereshaw#who helps the helper#little view of what jake is feeling still from chap1#but it's okay because these boys ARE going to talk and figure shit out#they just. you know. need to get there first.#and go through a little more before they do#also i need to stop writing out of order because trying to piece these together#is starting to be tricky for me lmao
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can you please walk us through the relationship between wemby and jabari the people need to know
i think the most notable thing about vic and Jabari's relationship is that they don't have one, when it would be so beneficial if they did. they're like two soldiers fighting for the opposite sides of a war, too loyal to the cause to stop and think about what could have been if they just lowered their respective weapons aimed by cold hands larger than their own. foils by fate, friends by freedom.
' remember, you will Always be Different. '
' remember, you will Always be Replaceable. '
'Replaceable'
Jabari's dad made it in the NBA, then didn't. He was a big that could shoot, but wasn't a post-up man. Back then, post-up was the desired style. Ironically, now, it's all about shooting. But his dad didn't live in the now, and his career in the US was short-lived, to keep it cordial. Jabari's older brother played basketball throughout his whole life, but stopped after college. Jabari's cousin, Kwame Brown, was drafted 1st overall in the lottery, and became a notorious bust for the Washington wizards.
Basketball is a business. Basketball is fleeting.
It doesn't matter that a big with sharpshooter skills is valued as something so 'prized' in today's nba, not back then, not when it would have mattered for Jabari's dad. Making it is one ballpark in its own, but Staying in it? Can perhaps be an even more painful ordeal when the hoops to accomplish it aren't circus hoops, but a plain hill some just don't have the strength, mentality, or the materials to help climb without distraction or pitfall.
Jabari's dad made sure Jabari had this threat forever ingrained in his mind. When he yells at Jabari for misplaced eye contact, for typing the wrong words in a public social media reply, for reacting in a way a camera might misinterpret, it's out of love. Jabari's dad was known for being a hassle to coach back then, maybe because he knew his potential and no one else did because it was too new to the mold. So he makes sure Jabari doesn't follow his same habits. Jabari is polite to authority, simply replies with a 'Yes Sir' or a 'No Ma'am', he holds eye contact, he wakes up hours before he needs to just to jump rope, just to uphold the standards that his family could not. He is Everything his father is and isn't, plus more. When his team wins, he's still talking about his missed freethrows even 8 hours later. Because someone else could have won the game And hit those free throws too . someone from a family that gained success and stayed in that success. Someone who wasn't Just Another Son of a basketball player trying to do what his father couldn't, someone who was Different .
Everyone knew wemby was different. When his literature class was asked to write an essay about your future dreams in life, he wrote a fictional romance about a couple where the woman got in a car accident and was comatosed as a result, but got better in the end. He didn't write about being a great basketball player one day, because his parents don't pressure him to hunker himself into the norm, even though his mother once was and now coaches. If Wemby one day realized this wasn't for him, they would encourage him to leave and follow whatever greater passions propelling him. He's so agile for his size because his dad was an Olympic talent in track and field. He is someone who has hobbies and talents that are considered common alone, but strange combined, because he loves what he has and what he does. He reads every night for one hour before bed not to appear as some pseudointellectual, but because he Genuinely loves it, and when he loves something, he excels at it. He does try to be different, but not out of ego. He just loves to be. He either accomplishes at 200% or zero. It may be 200% in an unexpected direction, but it's His direction and that's what matters. If he somehow does wind up a bust, a possibility he considers without fear but acceptance as potential fate, then he won't go down as yet another failed first pick. He'll fall as he flew, Victor Wembanyama.
' Different '
' Replaceable'
Jabari winces each time he's subbed out, even for a second, even on an injured ankle, he's silently Stubborn, his posture shrunken and his gaze at the ground yet his eyes, big, wobbling, staring up always at the speaker, he's silently scared.
Jabari doesn't Want to be different. He just wants to be what his family couldn't be when it came to fame: irreplaceable . His parents split when he was younger, he tries his hardest to appease them both as to not cause any more issues. The relationship relies on his shoulders more than ever, and he can't fumble it again. He has to be what his dad couldn't so his dad can stay, commenting on commonality or surprises. He wants to support his still working mother, especially after the split. He doesn't Want to be unique, he just wants Security.
Because this can crumble any moment now, it doesn't matter how high your pick was or how bright the future Could Have been or how the game would later shift to your style if you had just somehow Stayed. Why bet on low chances if you know you can't handle the risk. He shakes any college coaches' hands that showed up to his practices, personally thanks them for coming even though he's one of the best in the country so their presence should be a given to him, it's not. When he picks a college, he picks one that guaranteed their faith in him from day One, and didn't require any further prodding to finally say '.. Maybe we'll offer you a position' like Kentucky did, as big and famous as it is, it wasn't Secured . They saw him as a risk at one point, and that's everything he's been trying to avoid when it came to attention, negatively standing out.
Jabari wants to be known as the strong shoulder to the world. He WANTS to be known as That One Guy who can just carry everything, nameless but Good. He just wants to be Good. Please tell him he's good. Please tell him what he's doing is Good. That basing his entire personality around yet another soldier who ultimately fell in battle but fought nonetheless being nameless is Good. Please feel free to give him all your burdens to bear like he's just some mule, an animal, a Tool .. because that means he's Useful, at least. That means he's Good. And if he isn't good, then he's nothing. Because you can always just buy another one anyways. A better one.
'Different'
Although his parents try not to treat Wemby by simplifying his differences into a strictly labeled, simple FUTURE BASKETBALL PRODIGY box at birth, that doesn't mean that can always stop others from doing it. Wemby signed his first autograph at ten years old.
It didn't matter if he was a kid who was so much more than just his basketball future, basketball fans wanted one thing from him and one thing only: Success. People didn't care about his literary skills or his drawing hobbies. The eyes on his alien needed to be smaller 'so your shoe can sell better, trust us, it's still Your drawing.. your weird little .. not money-making hobby, do believe me, Vic, We know what We're doing. You just stick to whatever you do.'
His differences, in the end, are minimalized just to that. He's just Different. That's what everyone says who wouldn't really care to say anything at all if he never hooped as well as they wanted in the first place. The youtube videos of 40 year old men criticizing his 15 year old games didn't Really care if he was just a kid, they just cared in the 'imagine when he reaches peak physicality? imagine the points (money) he'd make for the nba.' His beautiful differences, artistic, soft, unique but oh-so wonderfully common and passionate.. are all dissolved into 'Different', the Base definition.
he's an alien. Someone you can just dump all your poverty franchise worries onto because don't worry, he's Different. Trust me, he'll save your team. 'He's Different. ..am i talking about how he'd effortlessly answer questions in class while also trying to hide the fact that he's playing on his phone by tucking his bony legs awkwardly in his chair and crouching his spine over that it looked almost scary? HELL NO? what does THAT have to do with BASKETBALL?? no, he's just freakishly long, but like. Gifted. Though. ... I don't know, man, he's just DIFFERENT, okay? you can trust me, i'm a sports podcaster, okay? everything i say is gold.'
A celebrity approaches him because he was different than most famous basketball athletes. He was Different. And yet, when he didn't recognize or notice her presence due to Different cultures ( due to Being Genuinely, Detailedly Different ), he was scorned and ushered out of public eye so another possible pr bomb couldn't injure his reputation as a Difference That They Really Would Rather Not Want.
that's what his reading falls into, his old friends, his family, his art, his personality. If it's beyond ball, if it's beyond Business. The world only cares if it's marketable. Sure, some reporters will ask a question outside of sport, but only because it'll be a Different.. funny little nugget of knowledge for fans to laugh at then soon disregard for what Really made him famous. But, Wemby is what he always wanted to be. He's Different. So What if it's not exactly the kind of Different he actually wants, he actually functions on? No one has the time to perform 200% anymore. Slap the label you wanted and call it quits, stop being so High-Maintenanced. That's not marketable.
You're just different. And to some people, that's all you'll ever be. No need to explore it any further. Who knows, your Consumers might find something they won't like. And we can't risk that happening to our greatest circus freak.
i mean. Generational basketball talent .
If there's a press conference going on that somehow includes the two, then Wemby just wants to be sure everyone can hear what he really wants to say, in his own words, not echoing anyone else's, and Jabari just wants to Be in the Room.
His brother stopped playing basketball because his family said he didn't try hard enough. Jabari Can't have that. His whole life revolves Around basketball, around sport. He doesn't WANT to be DIFFERENT if that isn't the soundest option, he just wants to be GREAT. Because GREAT is SUCCESS. Jabari Smith is not success. It's just a retry at it . His father shares the same name.
Wemby's life did not always revolve around basketball, to people, at one point. At one point, Wemby's life was just his life. Now, it seems like only his family think that, and they're from a whole other country. When he comments on videos critiquing his playstyle, he doesn't do so out of anger or questioning, he does so because he genuinely Wants to improve. He Does want to be great. But, he wants to be great in Everything that he finds interesting. He always did. When he likes an author, he reads All their books, not just their most notorious novel. He wants to be transported into other people's worlds so he can learn, so he can change, so he can be Different. Even if he somehow were to lose all of this fame, this Greatness, this job, this opportunity, he will never really lose. Because he's someone who's always taken opportunities to the fullest, so even if they pan out a little differently, that's Fine, really, because he's different. Not in the minimizing, dictionary definition then leave the meaning at that different, but in the butterfly effect. What he once was ten days ago is not exactly the same of what he is now, and it hurts, sometimes, when people fail to see that, or simply don't want to because textbook different is easier to digest than worldly different.
IN SHORT.. theyre foils. i can't Exactly walk u thru their relationship bcs .. there Isn't one.. & that's what's so Interesting about them. That's what makes their relationship, to me. Because if they WERE to be friends, if they somehow in some alternate world WERE to get paired up on the same team... they would be friends. I really think they would be. Not only because their signs are so compatible, or their differences are so stark, but because their similarities would triumph everything beautifully. Maybe. We don't know because they Weren't paired together, we can only speculate. But i think it would be big and beautiful, whatever they would have, it would be Something.
unfortunately, we don't live in an alternate world where they're teammates though ! Double unfortunately, Jabari and Wemby's biggest similarity is their loyalty to the game (a double-edged sword in both their lives from Jabari's silent unhealthy desire to be limited and Wemby's silent desperation not to be) Wemby, in Jabari's eyes, is Indeed a powerful...
Problem.
He's not really a person to him . In all fairness, no one really is when they're involved in the basketball world, not to Jabari, not from the way he's been taught. Everyone's supposed to be Replaceable, a faceless tool in the pocket of good business.
.. except for This freakazoid. Apparently.
APPARENTLY, he's some supposed 'saint'. someone to be feared for being more. APPARENTLY, the reporters just LOVE yapping about him SO much, that Jabari HAS to take the time out of his training just to talk about some guy who doesn't even GO here, yet when they ask him about his opinion on future prospects. WELL, that's ALL wemby IS to Jabari, just another future prospect. Just another problem.
A problem he'll be sure to check off his list.
... okay, so Maybe he's a bit more than a problem.. maybe.. he's just a really persistent problem? yeah, that's it, nothing more. Jabari will work through this. He Always does. That's what he does well, Work.
Wemby wonders if that's all he ever does .
But he doesn't have long before Jabari's marching down the tunnel to beat himself up over all his mistakes other people would never make, and Wemby's being escorted to an interview that other people would never make solely to show how Much he just Stands Out as a soul... in basketball .
I hope they find each other in basketball, and out of it as well. I just feel like
Something would Happen
#THANK YOU for this ask#i was so scared making it tho like... im srry it's so long but im afraid i cant short answer in life 😭#if im scared it's gonna miss something 😭#i MAY be an overthinker hooper 🗣‼️‼️💯🔥#in reality thank u for asking fr <333 it's been a while since ive done one of my (in)famous ted talks LMAO#i hope this helped 😊!! <- i say as the whole point of it was that it couldnt actually help#LiSTEN- iN THE END.. IT'S FOR THE DELULUS IM AFRAID#the OHHHH but the POTENTIALL#mfs who have mental illness (multi shipping)#theyre like pg and dame Thats a Bad Shot to be#like they both have insane 200% or nothing work ethics... but driven into such POLAR opposite means to an end#theyre like two people who wrote an antithesus to the other but would actually rule the world together if given the chance#2 veey powerful heroes belonging to two different alliances or worlds.. holding similar but different ideals#corny one liner quip bcs i have to for the kids marvel wemby and trying to be edgier bcs fck them kids dc jabari#idk theyre insane to me#pls say u understand#bcs i dont think i rlly do myself and thats why i love them so much#theyre a puzzle and i wanna know if the final product is exactly what ive been imagining from the pieces given to me#or if it's completely opposite#either way it's so fun for me to figure out but again. i may be insane#if i am .. feel free to tell me 😭😭 really. at least have the courtesy to tell the polar bear his world is melting before taking a picture#ted asks#ted longer#jaba#webby#IF I MISSPELL WEMBYS NAME PLS BE NICE 2 ME. I DID LORE RESEARCH HIM i SWEAR. I RESEARCH ALL MY POSSIBLE SHIPS PEOPLES CUS IM SCARED OF#MISINTERPRETATION. SO IF U SEE ME MISSPELL WEMBY.. IT'S BCS I AM STUPID YES. BUT LIKE. NOT WITH RESEARCH. IT'S JUST MY STUPID BRIAN#*BRAIN**** <-SEE?? i Dont think i have to explain any further how his name is a Nightmare for people like me who#think 8s are 6s on a math test and fails bcs of it EVEN THO the problem wouldve been right if it WERE to be a 6.. it is simply not
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at what point is it appropriate to be like “hey, did you people forget that I exist or something???”
#chat sesh with iris#vent#nobody here#but like#I’ll be trying to talk in my ‘super close friends who I’ve known for a while’ server#and nobody cares at all or responds to my messages or engages with me at all#it’s just like when I was a kid and I had a group chat with my friends where nobody said anything when I was like ‘this reminded me of you!’#or really just sent any message#like am I really that unimportant to you? do you people have some other chat without me? am I 14 again? or like what?#I’m like actually mad atp#I literally send things that I know specific friends like#I ask if anyone can hang out because I’m really depressed#and I get radio fucking silence#what the fuck ever#at least I have tumblr asks that I can answer LMAO#fucking pissed#I’m making a Gary moodboard and maybe I’ll calm down LMAO
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Try list any Octo-Agents and think of an Episode you Think give them a Shining Moment
W O O F this took a while– I was thinking long and hard about this because there are SO MANY good moments and episodes 😅, and so many agents– it was difficult, but I’m happy with my answers 👀
Ranger Marsh’s Shine Episode is definitely The Monitor Lizards. I LOVE this episode, it’s one of my favourites in the whole series so far—not just because of the events in it, but as a concept. I LOVE the callback to the Great Swamp Search!! I watched the 2nd season blind, and seeing all these familiar faces was SUCH a fun surprise. It’s good for Ranger Marsh as a character, because it actually shows him doing his job as a Ranger, not as an Octo-Agent. It also reinforces the fact that he truly cares for and is friends with these creatures, even if they are invasive, and that he's willing to travel to check in on them. This is another episode that also proves (to me) that the writers know they’re dealing with an older audience for the show, and are more likely to delve into solid lore and continuity. This episode makes me really hopeful for more of that.
Natquik’s Shine Episode, WITHOUT QUESTION, is The Red Fox. Honestly I feel like I don’t need to explain why, but I will because I like talking ✨: Natquik is my favourite Octo-Agent, but overall we haven’t actually gotten that many episodes dedicated to him yet. The Red Fox gives us a close and personal look into what Natquik is like by himself (I love episodes where characters are alone 👀), how he deals with problems (by ignoring them until they get worse—which is interesting... *stares at Barnacles*...), and even hints toward his family, by showing us his family portraits, and leaving us wondering, “Where are they?” – There are so many moments I love in this episode, from when he first discovers the kits, decides to help them stay warm, rushes to protect Barnacles, to his bittersweet goodbye at the end. It’s all so perfect.
Tracker absolutely shines in The Missing Lake. Honestly, he shines a LOT in Above and Beyond, considering he never got his own episode in the main series, and was only in Operation Deep Freeze for two scenes. AnB has been really good to Tracker, and I’m so grateful they decided to make him an Agent. The Missing Lake sticks out to me the most, because for the most part he is by himself (and I’ve already mentioned my love for that <3), and unlike all his other episodes, we get to really see him be responsible and use his Polar Scout skills in action. He’s often portrayed as a follower, who just goes along with whatever he's told to do, but he takes charge twice in this episode: when he offers to help Rowan, and when he stays behind to save Buck. Love that for him.
Calico Jack. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Calico Jack....... I could talk forever about this funky old cat man. He doesn’t just shine, he GLOWS in every episode he’s in—but alas, for the sake of this post I will be focusing on The Harlequin Duck. I love the showing of his gentle parental instincts in this episode, and his singing; since we know he canonically has a theme song, that I headcanon he wrote himself. I think far too much, and often, about how he legit panicked when he realized the egg was missing. How his first instinct was to hide that fact from Captain Barnacles. He was terrified, having a full blown panic attack on screen. He apologizes to the mother duck with such genuine solace, and promises to get it back “On [his] honour as a pirate!” ...Which is extremely significant to me, considering Kwazii was the first character to EVER say the phrase: “On me honour as an Octonaut!” in The Flying Fish after Inkling’s book was lost – and of course as a final touch, I adore seeing him work with Pete to get the egg back. The way he tosses the egg in the air, fully trusting that Pete will catch it... they’re so in sync, just as pirate and parrot are meant to be ;)
Paani... I feel like there’s so much more to him than what we’ve seen so far, it almost feels unfair to assign him a “Shine Episode”. So, instead of highlighting a single episode, I’ll quickly talk about three that stick out (PS: you might sense a theme 🤣):
The Barnacle Geese - Uncle Paani. I like the “I’ll be my own uncle” joke, and the Edgar Allen Poe reference. I think Paani’s determination to help the chick (who doesn’t seem to want help) is nice to watch, and helps to prove his worthiness as an Agent—which is always fun considering his hesitance when Barnacles tried to recruit him in S1E1. In a way, this episode also makes Paani seem more like Barnacles. See my old post analyzing the show’s intro. (*Stares at the episode title* 👁️👁️)
The Arabian Camels - Take a shot of cocoa every time I mention my love for episodes where characters are forced to be by themselves. This one is especially interesting to me though, because we know that Paani was alone, for a very long time, before he met the Octonauts. He has no trouble working and getting by alone, and we get to see him exhibiting that, while being out of his element (a dry desert) at the same time; and that’s really cool.
The Lonely Frog - ...Y’know how they constantly make the Octonauts/Agents meet creatures with similar issues to them? Yeah. *Stares at the episode title.* *Stares at the end scene where he says “Kinda like when I met you guys!” before obnoxiously jumping into the lake, in response to Shellington+Peso saying “They never even knew each other existed before! [...] and now it’s like they’ve known each other all their lives!”* *STARES MORE AT THE EPISODE TITLE,,* *wonders how long Paani was actually alone before becoming an Agent...*
Pinto, where art thou? He wasn’t in S2 at all, which was a bit disappointing since we just saw him get an Octowatch in S1. I would’ve expected him to be pressing that button every chance he got, giving us a “Penguin who cried Octoalert” episode. But anyway,, The Curious Penguin is the PERFECT episode for Pinto. It shows his personality really well, and I love how his distractions and the things he learns and discovers help him to save the day in the end. I think Pinto (just like Kwazii) is a good portrayal of ADHD, and how he just needs to be in the right environment to succeed. Each time Pinto messes up or loses focus, isn’t because he was left alone and couldn’t be trusted—it’s because he was left alone and understimulated. So when he’s thrown into a sudden high-stakes situation, all of his focus hones in on the moment, and he’s able to save Dashi and Paani by himself.
AND, because you didn’t say it had to be an Above and Beyond moment, I want to throw some love at The Oarfish episode from the main series. In this episode, Pinto no longer views Peso as “less” than an Octonaut, and is so excited to watch him do his job—it’s really cute!! His impulsivity is once again a positive thing—granted, it seems to annoy Peso a little, but when you think about it he kinda saved the day by being impulsive. He sounded the Octoalert without permission, which let the captain know to come back before their radio signal cut out, and by being unafraid of the “monster” and swimming outside, he was able to discover what the problem was so that Peso could help. He did good.
Pearl.... I love Pearl a lot, but I can’t think of one specific episode that comes to mind for her. I love The Pupfish because it introduces Peri to AnB, and I love how he teaches her how to tie a knot, so she can save the algae (and Glen). I like The Bison episode because it’s interesting watching her not doing something with algae for once, and The Pink Glacier because her and Kwazii’s dynamic was something I didn’t know I needed, but now I want more of (/p).
Ryla. Possibly controversial opinion: I liked Ryla in The Caves of Sac Actun, more than I like her now in Above and Beyond. I know she’s only gotten 3 episodes so far, but she’s really missing something. Sac Actun gave us lore on her right off the bat: she’s old friends with Dashi, she’s a skilled cave explorer, she’s spunky, she’s purple. AnB hasn’t given us much yet. So far her only shtick is caves, and that’s getting a bit repetitive. Consider every moment she has in Sac Actun as her “Shining Moment”, because honestly that whole movie is a 10/10.
Koshi,,,, she hasn't gotten that much yet, but I'm gonna say The Longfin Eels is her Shine Episode. I like the way she narrates the whole episode, because it's very in-character. Plus we know she’s literally writing about this adventure in her diary as she's telling it, as if it were a mystery book. She reminds me of narrators from 1920s film noirs, and that’s cool. Also! Honorary mention of the scene when she gets her Octowatch: I loved that for her <3
Min is below the cut, because my answer for her includes some very heavy SEASON 5 SPOILERS, including SCREENSHOTS:
All of Min's appearances so far are dear to my heart. However, my favourite has to be her own introductory episode: The Giant Chinese Salamander.
The Rainforest Rescue is another amazing episode for Min—she’s a wonderful character on her own, of course—but I think we can all agree that she and Inkling are very adorable together (no matter how you interpret their relationship).
When Above and Beyond aired on Netflix, there was a lot of confusion around Min, from the younger audience and other fans who hadn’t seen S5. The Giant Chinese Salamander introduces Min with a 20-minute special; showing her in high-stakes action with Kwazii, bonding with the Octonauts, being an all-around Cool Person™, and a flashback of how she met Inkling when they were younger.
She saved his life. He was thrown far inland by a rough storm, and was trapped until she found him. I honestly headcanon that Min partially (if not outright) inspired Inkling to form the Octonauts, and this moment could have literally sealed the fate of EVERYTHING we know.
But! Until S5 comes out, that's all I've got to say~ 👋💝
#i wanted to include screenshots for everyone's answers but there wasn't enough room and this post is big enough as it is 😅#so instead y'all get an essay jdhdjdks <33#octonauts above and beyond#octo-agents#about time i start using that tag lol#octonauts#am i going to one day make a giant analysis on cj in anb?? honestly maybe. there's so much there to talk about- i'm obsessed with him lmao#but it prbly won't be for a while#also. a message from future me when s3 is out: ''the natquik and tracker episode is amazing and a huge shine moment for both of them <3''#/hj#fun fact i started writing this post in an openoffice document xD i was comparing all the eps to try to figure out the best ones#long post#all paani's eps are s2 eps bc i rly wasn't sure how i felt about him in s1. but s2 solidified my love for him <3#hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm i think a barnacles and pinto episode would be really good. thats all#the curious penguin is also a good episode for teaching kids that it's okay and good to be curious and ask questions!! love that about it!#kwazii is peak adult adhd rep and pinto is peak child adhd rep. thank you for coming to my tedtalk. /srs#hhhhgggggnn i love the cats so much. if we ever get more baby kwazii content you'll never stop hearing about it from me#please enjoy this post. i worked Really Hard on it /gen 💞🥹#this post has been in my drafts for 50 years goodness gracious. take it away from me 🤣#bonus answer for paani: i really like the secret beneath the snow--#specifically the scene where he puts himself in front of gus to protect him from ''wolves''#like. yo. /pos#it felt like something barnacles would've done yk? and that's fun :))#i love min. i started writing this post before s5's english release got announced and i was talking about how i wanted anb#to give us more min and inkling content so we didn't have to wait 74363832 years to learn more about them xD#but now I'm SO EXCITEDDDD#. so excited for You Guys to watch S5#bc I've seen it already and have been living in a constant state of restraining myself from giving spoilers–#cough.#TAG LIMIT REACHED HDHDBSBSJWBSUDBSJSJDHSH
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last rb stressed me out lowkey akakska i had an ex like that and it became a self fulfilling prophecy kinda thing..
#like oof where do i even begin#for one... would recommend looking up what pedestalling is so u can catch urself when ur doing it.#and. hm. honestly even working on self worth n whatnot i think rly internalizing not 2 pedestal ppl cuts out a lot of self sabotage#like hello ppl in ur life r there bc they choose to be. you are worth it to them and they are showing u that w action.#u gotta be vulnerable.. u gotta trust in other ppl.. cautious optimism is fine but 😮💨😮💨#i hate when ppl assume what im thinking and feeling and act upon that. assumptions on assumptions.#my mom was like that in a mean spirited vindictive way. my ex would spiral if i took too long to respond stressed as hell#thinking that i had all these horrible thoughts about her or that i was just using her like holy shit I'm just sitting here drawing ajsjka#i am trying to make friends. i am recovering from my own personal circumstances and trying to figure myself out etc.#was also actively working on finding myself as a trans woman bc it was so early in my transition.#idk. like damn ppl have Lives‚ hobbies‚ other ppl they talk to‚ they take time for themselves.#if u don't know and ur stressed about it‚ ask..? but then believe ppl when they answer idk.#sorry.. I've annoyed myself lmao. it was wild... things were dead simple on my end but she came up w hella things she swore HAD to have bee#true and after breaking up w her she kept DMing me w long ass self deprecating vents and mischaracterisations#i had to block her after a while like 😐 u ever see somebody go to therapy and get worse somehow#i cannot fw people who have low self esteem anymore but like i sympathize from a distance lol#hello from the other side of the interaction... self love/worth is hard but please try#ur mischaracterization of ppl based on assumptions is hurting them and it will alienate ppl n push them away#and then become a sort of self fulfilling prophecy.. but also take what I'm saying w a grain of salt 🤷🏾♀️#i just have my personal experiences
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Is there any Essek scene in particular you’re hoping is included in the show?
Oh man oh god oh fuck. This list could go on SO long.
To be fair, the thing with Essek is that there are a lot of very small and fun but not narratively load-bearing scenes, and then a few major scenes that have a decent amount of narrative weight to them. For instance, the first study scene (the second is important but could be combined into it if that the pace required it), the Scourger incident, the dinner, and most of episode 97 have a lot of narrative impact, either for Caleb's arc or for the plot as a whole. I've already suggested I need to see the ninth floor tower conversation animated like a fish needs water to breathe, and I'd love both the times Essek physically pulls Caleb out of danger, of course.
There's also a lot of wiggle room in how you pace the Nein and break up their arcs (which I think was more rigid translating campaign 1 to LoVM—even when arcs are shifted around, the sequences of events are kept somewhat orderly) which means that speculation is pretty hard, particularly when it comes to Essek, who meets the Nein so far into the campaign. Basically, any of these things might not be as narratively necessary by then, depending on what they choose to cut or focus in on. I could speculate on that, and I'm sure I will extensively, but at a certain point I might as well just write a series worth of scripts as a fun side project.
That being said, I do really hope the Scourger scene remains, because it is so cinematically interesting, and I do consider it a major turning point between the wizards, regardless of either of them realizing it at the time or not.
And I also really want to watch him have a panic attack over whiskey cocoa. It is in no way load-bearing, but nonetheless, I would like to see it, and I think I deserve it.
#there IS actually something to be said about the narrative weight of essek having a panic attack while guzzling spiked hot cocoa but#I've talked about that elsewhere#this is for vibes lmao#thank you for the ask! it also reminded me I did get an ask about tone the other day and have not had a chance to answer yet#thank you to everyone who has taken my bait and allowed me to chatter about my boi this series and adaptation literally my fave topics#mighty nein animated#essek thelyss#oh boy I am tempting myself with the concept of just sitting down and writing a series worth of scripts for lulz.#I have done it before and I should Not do it again but boyyyyy do I kinda wanna#tbt the time my professor told me my thesis project was pointless cuz I couldn't use it as a writing sample. I'm still just.#excuse me ma'am. LOVE HER. great screenwriter. but oh my god what if I just want to PRACTICE. hello.#I did in fact write 600 pages of script out of spite cuz of that. so yanno. again. I could fully do this just for kicks.
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Speaking of retcons. What fans does Liam have to manipulate? Liam has always been the least popular member of 1D and what fans he did have disappeared when his 2018 album got yanked. You can tell that because his most popular music required GP interest. Plus he can’t sustain a UA and there’s no one defending him on Twitter. Every thing goes viral because there aren’t enough accounts to muddy the algorithms with other tweets. It’s the least believable thing Maya has said. That and her descriptions of his team as powerful. A powerful and manipulative team looks like Harry’s. They’ve been sweeping his indiscretions into a very dark corner for years. One day they’ll come spilling out and he’ll have his Diddy moment. His team will have made their money so they won’t care.
#this is a word salad of hella nonsense#i'll give a few high point answers since you asked--i guess?#1. for whatever fucking reason liam DOES have fans#they are ALL OVER twitter screaming free him and shitting on women like the very best most loyal 1D-ers tend to be right down to today#2. none of these men can seemingly earn a dedicated UA from what i can see which is no surprise since they broke up 10 years ago#(relationship UAs don't count--that's a whole other world but individual ones? i'm friends with the fashion ones#and THEY aren't bothered 'even with' harry lmao)#3. see above about twitter--yes women have come forward talking about what a shitty abusive person Liam is for the gross things he's DM'd#but he has a massive following on twitter and you would goddamned know it/see it (even I am seeing it)#4. and listen harry HAS had women come out and say some pretty damning shit about him#was it abusive? no#was it gross? yes#did anyone listen? no and that was because ewww women...total pick me's cunts etc#u shouldn't listen to them (or Lou T etc)#don't even get me started on how weird it is to act like you can say wahh he's closeted which means he somehow CAN'T treat women like shit#he can--he has--he does! look at who he hires! treats his 'girlfriends'! pick someone supportive amirite! hashtag goals!#but wow the sad trombone louie of it all just bleeds through this ask...it's been a while and anyway ANYWAY here's a UO to get you awf:#i don't think harry styles has been on the 'giving' end of a diddy-style party but the receiving end? MAYBE SO RECEIPTS
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fjdjdje loved your analysis of the sims's language!!! dag dag is what i hear them say the most so i went with it lmao
(also do they have their own letters or is it all just spoken words? 👀)
i'm glad you enjoyed 😂
but it makes sense that you'd hear that most often! dag dag and sul sul are probably the most well known phrases, since they are both just greetings (tho i think dag dag became more of a thing only in the sims 4? might be wrong tho)
Simlish is so fascinating to me because it's a mix of several different languages while still being basically untranslatable, like, there are some words or phrases that have been consistent throughout the games (like nooboo meaning baby) and i'm just now finding out that it has a wikipedia page with some info about its phonology and stuff, but it was purposefully made to not be understood so that everyone playing is equally confused about what the sims are saying <3
and also with the real songs being translated to Simlish, they want the words in Simlish to have a similar vibe to the original more than they want it to be consistent across songs, i won't find it now but i watched a video on youtube at one point where someone wanted to make a song fully in Simlish based on the already translated songs and it was just not possible to find the exact equivalents, like with 'dance' in my tags, it was 'desh' or whatever in that one song i found, but i bet there are others where it's something not even slightly related to that, they just pick and choose which word to change completely and which to keep kind of similar
(also side note but i just love thinking about actual artists recording their song for the sims, they just get a page of gibberish lyrics that fits the rhythm of the song and are asked to go for it like?? incredible. i watched a video about this too and can you imagine for example Gerard Way of mcr fame doing it? or Janelle Monáe? not to mention Katy Perry (she had a whole stuff pack for herself in the sims 3)? and yet it all happened! there's even a Car Seat Headrest song in ts4, wild.)
also yes, they do have letters! everything in the environment of the game is written in Simlish, you can see it for example on signs or the computer or books i think too? i was under the impression that it was, again, not really readable or translatable, but apparently the letters do have equivalents?
not sure how official this is tho, i just found it on google when i was looking for some examples of the writing
well. i kind of went off about all this, hope it was at least a bit interesting 😅
#can you tell i love talking about the sims lmao#the lore of the game is just so!! interesting to me!#and i don't even mean the lore of the content like characters' backstories and stuff#that's fun too of course but i love to find out new things about the history of how each game was made and the conspiracy theories!!#like i remember being 11 or 12 and reading every single article on the polish sims wiki#i've been here for a While#anyway thank you for the ask!!#answers to things#sim dnp shitposting#i guess? it's kind of related at least i won't lose it
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boy how do you reblog such great things
been cultivating my dash for years. i also found most of them in my drafts
#looked at my drafts to find a Rb about my day / the boy i like (☕) BUT. IT ATE JT LMAO POST IS GONE#however i will do it here and now#SO IT WAS “CULTURE DAY” TODAY BUT MOST PPL USE IT AS NON UNIFORM DAY#I go in & see ☕ in form and go to assembly blah blah blah dont see him again until 3rd period#i sit behind him in english bc we have a room change and i have an excuse hes sososo funny and talks to me like the whole time#same as biology but he got kicked out for talking too much lol#then at lunch he disappears nd im a little bummed BUT HE APPEARS FROM THE HALL AND INVITES ME#so i go and bring my friends too and we sit while he & some younger years dance#and hes dancing and slaying etc etc all flamboyant /pos /pos /pos sometimes on the stage sometimes near us#near us he looks. fucking DEAD into my eyes and sings along to the song when its like “i know you like me” or sum#NDJSBDJSBE AHHHHH#and im sat a little away from the group but he sits with me specifically#friendgroup takes a pic without me really noticing & my friend Annabelle jokingly goes “why is Bev looking at ☕ with so much love”#I laugh it off. but ohhh ny god u have no idea. i was heart eyes motherfucker the whole time#HES SO CUTE IM SCREAAAAMING WITH THE WAY HIS KIPPAH KINDA MOVES HIS HAIR & HIS NEW GLASSES & SHIRT THAT ISNT UNIFORM SO I CAN SEE HIS WAIST#UGHFJSBSKSB MY GOD MY GOD MY GOD#hes so cool its so scary to be around him#then in PE we were meant to habe just dance for the last 2 weeks but theres been no available room#our group were in the gym but we got permission to wonder around instead#☕ says “whatre you doing?” i say “walking aimlessly” and he says “OH MY GOD PERFECT SAME LETS DO IT TOGETHER”#so him & me & my friends r walking and then im like. can we play just dance in the tennis courts#So he gets it on his phone starts playing and dibs me as a partner for Girlfriend and Timber. oh my sweet lord.#GODDD HES SO PRETTY AND FUNNY AND COOL IM OBSESSED WITH HIM OH MY GOD.#so anyway. thats the answer to your question LMAOOO#loz tag#asks#beverly says stuff#the bev is gay chronicles#☕#like before i wasnt sure if i LIKE-LIKED him or if it was hyperfix or smthn. im now 100%sure i really really like him
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I was like "aww kiddo, back home <3" and then I saw the tag in all caps "hello morro enjoyers do you remember me" and I was like "who even are you" I look at the url and, SEA?!?!?
LMAO HI??? NOT A LOT OF PEOPLE CALL ME SEA DO IKNOW YOU
#who calls me sea#cam#cradle#kari?? sometimes#mochi?? i actually don’t remember#cloud on occasion#i can rule out cam i know it’s not cam#idont think cradle or cloud would turn on anon??#kari and mochi have both sent me asks without anon#i feel like i’m missing people#unless this is someone i haven’t talked to who calls me sea in their head LMAO#inthat case hello anon it’s nice to meet you#lemme tell you i was confused about the kiddo bit for a while i was like who tf is home#idk how ‘morro enjoyers’ didn’t click it for me#jellos answers#um#morro ninjago
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