#mayor basil

[winterlady1967]

the “smoke a blunt and write an email to your prof” to “have a deeply personal conversation at a bar with your friend who was once your prof that leaves you dizzy with repressed desire” pipeline

[veil-over-miitopia]

Fuck it; have some Leander since it is 5 AM and I have an exam in 4 hours

[hedgehog-moss]

I finally planted my garden last week! We had a couple of days of sun which gave me hope, but it's once again raining every day. Thoughts and prayers for my tomato plants, but I couldn't keep everyone in the greenhouse forever, I had to make room for other plants.

(In the fourth picture above you can see what's inside the hügelkultur mound—it's a pile of branches + llama manure + compost + potting soil. One thing I find great about it is how well it retains moisture! Well it's not a problem this year so far but during heat waves I water these plants a lot less than non-mound plants.)

In the greenhouse my seedlings have been struggling due to lack of sun. Impossible to get courgette plants so I had to buy a few from the young couple in town who recently started a plant nursery—they didn't have many either, and I had to share with the mayor who also came looking for courgette plants because slugs devoured all of his.

He must have seen on my face that I thought my plants didn't stand a chance if slugs don't even respect municipal authority, because he kindly advised me to place crowns of bedstraw (see above) around my plants to protect them. I didn't dare to ask "If it works so well why do you have no courgette plants left?" I just said thank you, and then spent an entire evening last week weaving this sticky weed into crowns and whatsapping photos of my art to the mayor, who always replied "More! More! It needs to be thicker! Like a doughnut!"

Meanwhile 1 leek in the greenhouse suddenly grew a lot thicker while the other 3 remained skinny and fearful-looking and I'm not sure why. They share a pot, so maybe it's like vanishing twin syndrome. My bell pepper seeds had the same asynchronous development issue—one pot is just now starting to have timid seedlings while the other (right next to it) already contains a grown-up plant with baby peppers:

By far my happiest greenhouse plants are the potatoes and lettuce. They shot up so fast! I've been eating a lot of lettuce lately but I can't keep up with how quickly they grow in this cold, rainy spring. And I haven't had any slug raids in the greenhouse so that's great.

My greenhouse squash, onions and pickles are still tiny and not worth a photo (harsh, but this post already has too many photos). My strawberries in the aquaponic towers are beautiful despite the lack of sun and I've been getting mini-harvests of 2-3 strawberries a day for two weeks! They're done now, but I started more seeds so maybe I can get a second round at the end of the month.

Three more things:

1. Morille helped a lot as I was planting the garden. She kept an eye on my gardening tools so no one would steal them, and sometimes used them as cheek-scratchers. At one point I put one of my beautiful bedstraw crowns around her neck so she looked like Philip III of Spain in that painting where he wears a big ruff, but tragically she ran away in outrage before I could take a picture, and when she returned she'd got rid of her collar.

2. At the cow parade the other day there was a lady at the market who sold jars of homemade pesto sauce made from all kinds of different plants, and it opened up my mind to entirely new pesto horizons!! I always make the traditional kind with basil, but I have plants that grow much faster than basil, like my rocket, so I tried making pesto with 1/3 basil 2/3 rocket (plus garlic, olive oil, parmesan, cashews) and it was so good! I have to explore all of her recipes now, like plantain or nettle or sage pesto...

3. There's a monster in the greenhouse. It appeared practically overnight and is quickly claiming more and more territory. Unlike last year it's not a parsley monster—it's my lemon balm. One day it was growing in its vertical tower, luxuriant but tidy, like a normal plant, and the next it had quintupled in volume and was threatening to swallow the nearest planter. Look at the tiny tomato plants, they look terrified of it!

I urgently need to fight back against this giant mélisse (as we call lemon balm) but I've been really busy and I keep putting it off, and then remembering anxiously at 11pm that I still have this creature to take care of, which is ironic seeing as lemon balm is supposed to relieve stress and anxiety. This is the exact opposite of why I planted you. Anyway if you never hear from me again after this post it's because I finally engaged in battle against this year's vegetal menace, and lost.

[stalkerofthegods]

Ares Deep dive

Ares is the Greek god and patron of many things, he is the edge of the sword while you hold the soft side, no god can be the god of war without the bloodshed, so don’t judge so quick, he is an amazing god, we love Ares here.

Herbs • Garlic, basil, buttercup, yarrow, ginger, anything with tiny yellow flowers, spicy stuff (ex- peppers, paprika), Water hemlock, Snapdragon, Poppy, Nettle, Magnolia, Ginger

Animals• Vulture, Colchian Dragon, serpents, barn owls, woodpeckers, dogs, horses, Stymphalian birds, boars

Zodiac • Aries

Colors • Red, black, and dark purple

Crystal• garnets, rubies, bloodstone, obsidian, red scoria, smoky quartz, red jasper, carnelian

Symbols• a helm, a shield, a spear and sometimes a sheathed sword, flaming torch, armor, palace, four fire-breathing horses 

Jewelry you can wear in their honor• Iron, armor

Diety of• masculinity, civil order, Battle lust, courage, City guards/police, Rage, Violent deeds, Fights, Murder, Manslaughter, Quarrels, cheese, dancing, rebellion 

Patron of• the Amazons, City defenses, City defenders

Offerings• Dragons, Dragon imagery, Dragon art, Strong dark red wine, Strong whiskey, Pure water, Black coffee, Black tea, Olive oil, Beef, Red meats in general, Cooked fat from meats, Blood from cut meats, Heavy spices, Spicy foods, Garlic, Red, black, and dark purple candles, Art or statues of Him, Statues of horses or dogs, Weapons, armor, and shields (ex- art, statues, toys, handmade.), Trophies, Spicy jerky, Sport drinks / protein shakes, Hand drawn or printed art of HimArt or images of dogs, horses, and vultures, Feathers from vultures, woodpeckers, or barn owls, Iron or steel jewelry, Red flowers (ex- roses), Thorns, Miniature or toy weapons and armor (especially helmets), Snake skin, Animal teeth, Write down your fears or successes and give them to Him, Medals and ribbons you’ve earned, Antiques, Photos of riots or past wars, hot sauce, Pork ribs, homemade meals, poultry, hare, venison, wolf hearts, chili peppers, lemons, green bananas, unripe peaches, batons, bullets, kendo swords, shields, military helmets, bullet-proof vests, military boots, military belts, dynamite sticks, grenades, lion pelts, shark teeth, ram skulls, explosives (handle carefully), Medals or Certificates, dog fur or dog teeth (ethically sourced), horseshoes, bull horns, war memorabilia, broken glass, spicy jerky or twiggy sticks, Carmel, sushi, stormwater, spicy salsa, Mexican food, chocolate or chia pudding, burnt matches, cigarette butts

Devotional• Create a playlist and listen to music that makes you feel brave/empowered, Donate to the Rape Crisis Center or other similar programs, Donate and support victims of war, Cook with garlic or heavy spices that you haven’t tried before, Try new things and don’t feel ashamed about doing so, Tell Him about your accomplishments, Tell Him about your fears, Learn about shadow work and try it for yourself, Learn about history, past wars, and past riots, Learn what they accomplished or failed to accomplish, Learn and educate yourself about the downsides of war and what can happen to the people affected by wars, Partake in combat sports (ex- martial arts, fencing), Exercise, Play some strategy games like chess, Risk, and Civilization, Stand up for yourself and what you believe in, write to your governor/mayor for things you want to see changed, attend riots, Pray to Him (ex-strength, ability to fight and defeat enemies, courage, to keep others safe, and help in a battle), go to a protest, learn first aid, educate yourself on PTSD, do unharmful things that give you adrenaline rushes (ex- amusement park rides, bungee jumping), watch action movies with him, pet a dog, Playing Strategy Games, Work on managing your anger, bones, go do axe throwing, a playlist that makes you feel, brave, energized and confident, keep track of your successes (this can be daily tasks, when you conquer them cross them off, and then offer the list to Ares), write down or draw art of your fears, go to a rage room, pray or meditate during thunderstorms, watch war movies and documentaries and play war/combat and strategy video games

Ephithets•Adámastos/adamastus/ἀδάμαστος/ΑΔΑΜΑΣΤΟΣ/ἀδάμας -unconquerable & indestructible, Ænyálios/enyalius/ἐνυάλιος/ΕΝΥΑΛΙΟΣ -war-God, Alcimus, Álkimos/alcimus/ἄλκιμος/ΑΛΚΙΜΟΣ/Adj - valiant, brave, Alloprósallos/alloprosallus/ἀλλοπρόσαλλος/ΑΛΛΟΠΡΟΣΑΛΛΟΣ- loyal to the struggle and to the souls who are engaged in it, Ánax/ἄναξ/ΑΝΑΞ -lord, king, Aphneiós/aphneius/ἀφνειός/ΑΦΝΕΙΟΣ -rich, wealthy, Arrectus, Árriktos/arrectus/ἄρρηκτος, ΑΡΡΗΚΤΟΣ -unbreakable, Brotoctonus, Enyalius, Hippius, Hoplochares/Hoplodupus/Hoplophorus,  Íppios/hippius/ἵππιος/ÍΠΠΙΟΣ -horseman,  Mægasth��nís/megasthenes/μεγασθενής/ΜΕΓΑΣΘΕΝΗΣ/μεγασθενές -very strong,  Megasthenes/Mægasthænís., Ombrimothymus:See Omvrimóthymos/Omvrimóthymos/ombrimo hymus/ὀμβριμόθυμος/ΟΜΒΡΙΜΟΘΥΜΟΣ/ὀβρῐμόθῡμος -doughty, indomitable, Oplódoupos/hoplodupus/ὁπλόδουπος/ΟΠΛΟΔΟΥΠΟΣ -clattering in his armor, Oplokharís/hoplochares/ὁπλοχαρής, ΟΠΛΟΧΑΡΗΣ -rejoicing in arms, Oplophóros/hoplophorus/ὁπλοφόρος/ΟΠΛΟΦΟΡΟΣ - he who bears arms, Phrictus/Phriktós/phrictus/φρικτός/ΦΡΙΚΤΟΣ - horrifying, Polæmóklonos/polemoklonus/πολεμόκλονος/ΠΟΛΕΜΟΚΛΟΝΟΣ -he raises the clamor of combat, Polemoklonus/Polæmóklonos, Sceptuchus/ Skiptoukhos/Skiptoukho/sceptuchus/σκηπτοῦχος/ΣΚΗΠΤΟΥΧΟΣ -he who bears a scepter, Teichesipletes/Teikhæsiplítis/Teikhæsiplítis/teichesipletes/τειχεσιπλήτης/ΤΕΙΧΕΣΙΠΛΗΤΗΣ—he who storms the cities in battle, Vrotoktónos/brotoctonus/βροτοκτόνος, ΒΡΟΤΟΚΤΟΝΟΣ -the slayer of men.

Equivalents• Mars (Roman), Onuris-Anhur (Egyptian god), Tiu-Tyr (Germanic god),  unnamed war-god (Scythian god).

Courting• unmarried, but courting Aphrodite. 

Past lovers/crushes/hookups• Aerope, Agraulos, Harmonia, Otrere, Astyokhe, Demonike or Sterope, Kyrene or Asterie, Astyokhe

Personality• He’s a great father, and a great lover, I talk to a godspouse of his and they talk about how he calmed them and was always there. He’s a great father because I’ve talked to a person who their father is ares and he’s always there for them, he’s also generous.

Home• Mount Olympus 

Mortal or immortal • immortal

Fact• Ares was the only male greek god that never raped or sexually assaulted any woman

Curses• Routing armies, Cowardice, Death on the battlefield, Military invasion, Sacking of cities, Rebellion, Uprisings, Sedition

Blessings•Driving armies, Bravery, fighting strength & endurance,  Averting war (peace), Repelling invading armies, Maintaining civil order, Crushing rebellions, Restraint violent instinct,

Roots• Thrake, Ancient Greece.

Parentage• Zues and Hera

Siblings• Enyo (twin sister), Eris (sister), Apollo (half-brother), Artemis (half-sister), Athena (half-sister), Hephaestus (brother), Hermes (half-brother), Dionysus (half-brother), Hebe (sister), Heracles (half-brother), Aphrodite (half-sister).

Pet• four fire-breathing horses (Aithon (Red-Fire), Phlogios (Flame), Konabos (Tumult) and Phobos (Fear))

Children •ANTEROS (God of reciprocated love, son of Ares and Aphrodite), DEIMOS (God of fear, a son of Ares and Aphrodite.), ENYALIOS/Enyalius (A war-god son of Ares and Eris), EROS (God of love, a son of Ares and Aphrodite),  HARMONIA (Goddess of harmony, daughter of Ares and Aphrodite.), NIKE(The goddess of victory, a daughter of Ares), PHOBOS (God of panic, son of Ares and Aphrodite),AEROPOS/Aeropus (son of Ares and Aerope.), ALKIPPE/Alcippe (daughter of Ares and Agraulos), AMAZONES/Amazons (Warrior women of Assyria, daughters of Ares and Harmonia), ANTIOPE(daughter of Ares and Otrere), ASKALAPHOS/Ascalaphus (son of Ares and Astyokhe), DIOMEDES (son of Ares and Kyrene or Asterie), DRYAS (son of Ares), EUENOS/Evenus (son of Ares and Demonike, and sometimes the son of Ares and Sterope), HIPPOLYTE (daughter of Ares and Otrere.),IALMENOS/Ialmenus (son of Ares and Astyokhe), KYKNOS/Cycnus) (son of Ares and Pelopia or Pyrene), LIKYMNIOS/Licymnius (son of Ares most say his father was King Elektryon), LYKASTOS/Lycastus) (son of Ares and Phylonome.), LYKOS/Lycus (son of Ares who used to sacrifice strangers to his father), MELANIPPOS/Melanippus (son of Ares and Triteia.), MELEAGROS/Meleager (son of Ares and Queen Althaia, but most call him a son of King Oineus), MOLOS/Molus (son of Ares and Demonike), NISOS/Nisus (son of Ares, but most accounts say he was a son of the Athenian prince Pandion), OIAGROS/Oeagrus (a son of Ares but some say his father was King Kharops),OINOMAUS/Oenomaus (son of Ares and the Pleaid Sterope or Princess Harpinna), OXYLOS/Oxylus (son of Ares and Protogeneia), PARRHASIOS/Parrhasius(son of Ares and Phylonome.),PARTHENOPAIOS/Parthenopaeus (son of Ares and Atalanta, many say his father was Melanion or Meleagros), PENTHESILEIA (daughter of Ares and Otrere), PHLEGYAS (He was a son of Ares and Dotis or Khryse.), PORTHAON (son of Ares or according to others of Agenor), PYLOS/Pylus (son of Ares and Demonike.), REMUS (son of Ares and Ilia), ROMULUS (son of Ares and Ilia), TEREUS (a son of Ares.), THESTIOS/Thesius (son of Ares and Demonike or Agenor and Epikaste), THRASSA (daughter of Ares and Tereine.), DRAKON ISMENIAN (A monstrous dragon-serpent, it was a son of Ares and the Erinys Telphousia.)

attendees• DEIMOS & PHOBOS (The twin gods of terror and fear), ERIS & ENYO (goddess of strife, hatred and war), KYDOIMOS/Cydoemus (The god of the din of war), NIKE (goddess of victory), OTHER ABSTRACTIONS(spirits described such as Rage, Anger, Threats, Death and Valour)

Appearance in astral or gen• In ancient Greek art, he was depicted as either a mature, bearded warrior armed for battle, or as a nude, beardless youth with a helm and spear.

Festivals • Artemis Agrotera/Kharisteria , and Genesios, maybe.

Day • Tuesday 

Scared places• Odrysia in Bistonia, Thrake (his birth-place)

Planet• Mars

Tarot cards• Chariot & Emperor card

Scents/Inscene • Frankensince, Sandalwood incense, resin, burning wood (especially if Himalayan salt in thrown in since it reminds him of blood), and red sandalwood incense

Prayers• 

Prayer to Ares for the Safety of a Soldier

Bold-hearted Ares, bright-helmed son of thundering Zeus and noble Hera, well-honored god of war, any battle will you face, any foe will you fight, without fear and without hestitation. Ares, god of warriors, ally of those who risk their lives on the field, to you do soldiers offer their prayers. You know each one’s name, O Ares, you know their lives, you know their worth. Great Ares, I pray to you, watch over ____________ who heeded your call, who practices your art, whose name you know well, for s/he is one of your own who does you honor with each day s/he serves. Ares, I pray to you.

In general 

Bright-helmed Ares, strong of arm and stern of visage, firm of stance, unyielding of will, ever ready to face any foe, to hold the line against all who may come, to battle until the end. Ares, son of noble Zeus and wise Hera, cherished by golden Aphrodite, honored by those who call on you for strength and courage, in the north were you much honored in times of old, in Thrace and Thessaly were you held in esteem by those whose lives were harsh, whose world was stony, whose comforts were hard-won. Ares who answers the prayers of the despairing, I honor you

For Courage

Ares, fierce-hearted son of Zeus and noble Hera, full-famed you are as god of war. To you do soldiers pray when battle is most heated, when mettle is most needed. To you as well do we turn in desperate times, to you do we call for strength, for the spirit to endure. You understand the terror of struggle and strife, you confront it in every way. Ares, your courage is unquestioned, your might and your prowess unequaled. Ares, friend to those in direst need, I pray to you, grant me the nerve to face what must be faced, grant me the will to do what must be done, grant me the heart to forge ahead.

Links/websites/sources •https://greekgodsandgoddesses.net/gods/ares/

https://twelfthremedy.tumblr.com/post/624476009567289344/ares-offerings/amphttps://aspisofares.wordpress.com/tag/offerings/https://www.tumblr.com/warriots/622104378198933504/a-guide-to-ares-worship https://www.tumblr.com/warriots/622104378198933504/a-guide-to-ares-worship https://scarletarosa.tumblr.com/post/187742800571/ares-greek-god-ofhttps://www.tumblr.com/diana-thyme/722942201197363200/greek-gods-101-ares @enyalios-shrinehttps://greekpagan.com/category/prayers-2/ares/

BIG HELP TO

https://www.tumblr.com/tarotbee

Ares is the Greek god and patron of many things, he is the edge of the sword while you hold the soft side, no god can be the god of war without the bloodshed, he is an amazing god, we love Ares here.

I use resources, I do not own the info, and most deep dives have UPG (that I use in my work.) And I only take some information from sources. I am 14, this is my hobby, I am learning but I spent many hours and days on this, and I am always open to criticism. I have been doing worship for 5 years. Please know you can use the info, I do not sue, but I will take action if this work is used without permission and not put as a resource if used in any work. without permisson and not put as a resource if used in any work, for the public.

[medievalandfantasymelee]

Hot Medieval and Fantasy Men Melee Masterpost

Qualifying Round

Day 1

Guy of Gisborne [Michael Wincott] VS. Guy of Gisburne [Robert Addie]

King Arthur [Graham Chapman] VS. Robin Hood [Richard Todd]

Antonius Block [Max von Sydow] VS. Arman [Matvey Lykov]

Edward III [Blake Ritson] VS. Ivanhoe [Anthony Andrews]

Edward the Black Prince [James Purefoy] VS. Henry Tudor [Luke Treadaway]

Pero Tovar [Pedro Pascal] VS. Sir Thomas Grey [Nigel Terry]

Richard III [Benedict Cumberbatch] VS. Edward IV [Max Irons]

Éomer [Karl Urban] VS. Gimli [John Rhys Davies]

Elrond Half-Elven [Hugo Weaving] VS. Elrond Half-Elven [Robert Aramayo]

Carlos I [Álvaro Cervantes] VS. Mr. Tumnus [James McAvoy]

Niccolò Machiavelli [Julian Bleach] VS. Niccolò Machiavelli [Thibaud Evrard]

The Sheriff of Nottingham [Alan Wheatley] VS. Finan [Mark Rowley]

Guy of Gisbourne [Basil Rathbone] VS. Nasir [Mark Ryan]

William Thatcher [Heath Ledger] VS. King Arthur [Charlie Hunnam]

Darkness [Tim Curry] VS. Zbyszko z Bogdanca [Mieczyslaw Kalenik]

King Vortigern [Jude Law] VS. Uther Pendragon [Anthony Stewart Head]

Corlys Velaryon [Steve Toussaint] VS. Simon Aumar [Justice Smith]

Asbjörn [Tom Hopper] VS. Connor MacLeod [Christopher Lambert]

Hamlet [Christopher Plummer] VS. Mat Cauthon [Donal Finn]

Ned Stark [Sean Bean] VS. Lurtz [Lawrence Makoare]

~~~

Day 2

Dong Yilong [Henry Lau] VS. Frodo Baggins [Elijah Wood]

King Ecbert [Linus Roache] VS. Bofur [James Nesbitt]

Beowulf [Gerard Butler] VS. Henry V [Kenneth Brannagh]

King Arthur [Sean Connery] VS. Robin Hood [Sean Connery]

Thorin Oakenshield [Richard Armitage] VS. Thierry of Janville [Jean-Claude Drouot]

Björn Ironside [Alexander Ludwig] VS. Hamlet [Laurence Olivier]

Martin [Rutger Hauer] VS. Criston Cole [Fabien Frankel]

Bard the Bowman [Luke Evans] VS. Perrin Aybara [Marcus Rutherford]

Leofric [Adrian Bower] VS. King Marke [Rufus Sewell]

Miles Hendon [Errol Flynn] VS. Amleth [Alexander Skarsgård]

Jorah Mormont [Iain Glen] VS. Little John [Nicol Williamson]

Odda the Elder [Simon Kunz] VS. Barristan Selmy [Ian McIlhinney]

King Arthur [Nigel Terry] VS. Nicodemus Ravens [Jakob Oftebro]

Brian de Bois-Guilbert [Sam Neill] VS. Brian de Bois-Guilbert [Ciaran Hinds]

Edward I [Stephen Dillane] VS. Robert the Bruce [Chris Pine]

Prince Charmont [Hugh Dancy] VS. Galessin [Alexis Hénon]

King Arthur [Richard Harris] VS. Ulrich von Jungingen [Stanislaw Jasiukiewicz]

Brother Cadfael [Derek Jacobi] VS. Thomas Beckett [Richard Burton]

Father Beocca [Ian Hart] VS. The Mayor of Hamelin [Claude Rains]

Bronn [Jerome Flynn] VS. Mikoláš Kozlík [František Velecký]

~~~

Day 3

Balian de Ibelin [Orlando Bloom] VS. Athelstan [George Blagden]

[universalwhoreofthesouth]

Break from Reality 2 - C.YU

Pairing: Mr. Insanity X afab! reader

Genre: chaos & fantasy

Warning(s): some violence, bizarre imagery, mr. insanity has a god complex, mito is mentioned

A/N: Finally giving the people what they want since I saw a good handful of people enjoyed it, which makes me happy 🤍

A/N: Based on “So I Danced” MV so watch it if you don’t get the reference and if you haven’t read Part. 1

I’ll be God

I’ll be God

I’ll be God

I’ll be god today.

“Where did you even get this old thing?” You look at the very outdated 1968 Cadillac that he somehow “found”, the tan coloring chipping into a tin gray.

“Hey! Don’t insult her like that! She still works” Ian defended, blowing the remaining dust off the hood of the car.

“Where are we even going?”

“Emerald city. I have important business there and you’re gonna help me!” he beamed, startling you once more.

“Help you with what? I don’t even know you!”

“Exactly which is why it’ll work! He doesn’t know you so you would be a good distraction”

“He? Who the h-” “Heads up!” he tosses you a brown sack, which you nearly dropped because it was unexpectedly heavy. You look inside the sack, seeing a pair of black heels, pearls, and dark cloth.

“And what am I supposed to do with this? I’m not putting this on”

“Oh but you will” he tilts his head, his smile not dropping in the slightest.

“No I do-” you suddenly feel something cut off your airways, stopping your sentence as you try to breathe.

“Now what was that~? You’re in my world little one so you’re going to do as I say, got that?” he grins sadistically. You were on the verge of blacking out then you felt the pressure release, waves of air filling up your lungs, knocking you to your knees as you violently cough, your body readjusting.

“Now let’s get going!”

♟️

You both were now in the old-timey car, riding alongside the dirt road for god knows how long, finally getting on the road to Emerald City. You were not at all happy. You were in the passenger seat, sitting in a black satin dress with matching heels and pearls the same size as jawbreakers. He didn’t even tell you what the so-called “business” was. You were trying to think of conclusions that would make sense but anything was possible in this world, he’s magic after all. You see Ian in the corner of your eye. His eyes were on the road, driving with one hand on the wheel, the other tapping against the steering wheel to an imaginary beat in his strange mind but you were a quite confused yet worried because his face was resting, his cheeky smile that was imprinted on his lips wasn’t present, replaced with a blank expression. It felt.. Weird but you kept your lips sealed, silently thanking God that he didn’t talk your head off on the way there.

Your eyes begin to droop from exhaustion, having no way to tell what time it was in this place. Just as you begin to drift away, hoping to escape this vivid nightmare-

“We’re here~” Ian sings, his maniacal grin appearing back on his face. Your eyes shoot up, seeing an upcoming “Welcome to Emerald City!” sign ahead. You look outside the window, admiring the liveness of the city. The buildings were tall and flashy, hued with many shades of green from mint to the color of basil leaves. As you viewed the scenery, you saw a golden statue of a man up ahead. The man was dressed in a suit with a fedora, the hat covering his face as he was posed in a sitting position.

“Is that the mayor of this town?” You asked, not familiar with the man. Ian went quiet…

Too quiet.

“Hello? Did you not hear me?” You turn your head back to him, trying to figure out what was his problem but you were taken aback by his new appearance. His tan skin was now paler, his comically big eyes shrunk, his once lengthy black hair was now cut into a blonde pixie cut. His lips were tainted raspberry blue and he was wearing a lime green suit with mulberry polka dots.

What the fuck..

[fanfic-the-wish-your-heart-makes]

Chapter 4 of Revenge Can Hurt More Than the Person It's Aimed at (An Angsty Nygmobblepot x Reader Hurt/Comfort Fix-it Fic)

<-previous chapter

Chapter 4: Not Completely Heartless Plans and the Lack of a Corpse

Additional warnings for this chapter: Ed thinking about the possibility of Oswald killing the reader (he doesn't seriously think Oswald would harm you), mention of canonical alcohol problems (Oswald), self-deprecating thoughts (by Oswald)

Word count: 2784

Author's note: After me being busy and then ill, the new chapter's finally finished. Enter Barbara Kean & Tabitha Galavan 🤗

Thanks go to @gabriella-aesthetic for commenting on the last chapter & making me do the finishing touches on this one sooner. I hope you enjoy this chapter ❤

Wow, a cover for this chapter too? Yes!

_________________

Ed's eyes were fixed on the entrance to Gotham City Hall. Oswald still hadn't stormed out of the building like he'd imagined.

Ed looked away to Mr. Van Dahl's remains as well as Oswald's dead chief of staff in the trunk of the car, then turned to the shapeshifter he had met in Indian Hill, "A very good job."

Basil Karlo, aka Clayface, took off his contacts and removed his wig. "He bought it."

Ed smirked. "Hook, line and sinker."

"The voice wasn't quite right but, uh, you know." He heard stilettos on the paving stone and stepped back.

"Bravo, boys." Barbara Kean approached them with Tabitha Galavan close behind. "Penguin lost his mind on national TV. Just like you said he would."

"It's all about the power of suggestion." Ed was proud of his knowledge about the mayor. "And whispering in the right ears."

Tabitha wasn't as impressed, "Why don't you just leave these bodies for the cops? Have him arrested."

"That's too easy, Tabitha." He had much better plans, "I want this to be a slow, painful death. One of a thousand deep cuts. First we take away his mind-

Barbara interruped him, "Then - the part I like - we destroy his empire and take it for ourselves."

"And then when this bird is broken and alone, we do the humane thing...and put him out of his misery."

The blonde heiress pouted playfully, then giggled, and Ed smiled with her. He had this planned out to the-

"Why hasn't he left the building yet?"

Ed suppressed a glare at Tabitha.

"I don't know," he responded, folding his phone open to dial one of the contacts he still had from being Oswald's chief of staff. "Perhaps it's because-"

Two (2) messages from y/f/n y/l/n.

Oswald really needs me. He hasn't been feeling well since you left. I hope we can talk about it.

Reading your message made Ed ask himself whether his plan was really as fool-proof as he'd assumed it was. "He's late because he wasn't alone", he explained, then continued reading, Hopefully you don't think I'm ditching you for Oswald. I just had to be there for him, this day is extremely important.

He has an interview with Margaret Hearst, can you believe that?

Of course you'd support your friend when he had an interview with a star journalist. A star journalist Ed had secretely nudged towards Oswald.

"Ed?"

He didn't listen, being too focused on your texts:

I hope we can still meet :) When do you have time to spare? Just a quick heads-up: I don't know how the interview will go and if it doesn't Oswald, might need someone to be there for him, and well, we know how much trust he puts in other people, right xD?

Despite the guilt he felt at you worrying about Oswald, your words almost placated him, making him smile ever so slightly and feel transported to when you had all been friends, to that evening when Oswald had laughed so hard that-

"Hello?" Earth to Ed."

Barbara. Barbara was waving her hand in front of his face.

"Are you lost? What did you find out?"

"Y/n", he said, "y/n accompanied Oswald. It must be the reason why he's so late."

"Y/n got in the way, huh?" Barbara stalked towards the brown-haired man and began to circle him. "Do you want us to do something about that?" She halted in front oh him, "A little kidnapping maybe?"

Ed tensed, more than he had when talking about his plans for revenge. "No!" It came out aggressive, as if they were on opposite sides but he didn't care. "No one must hurt y/n!"

Barbara held up her manicured hands in a conciliatory way, "Okay! Geez, Ed, it's alright. Your friend's safe from us. Right, Tabby?"

"Yeah."

"Make sure that Butch, no, everyone, knows not to harm y/n."

Tabitha's scoff was overshadowed by Barbara's confident smile. "Consider it done. As long as your friend doesn't interfere, she thought.

Tabitha stepped towards them, "So you are friends?"

"Of course!" Ed said full of indignation.

She looked to Barbara and raised an eyebrow before he gained her attention back with his irritated tone, "Why wouldn't we be? What are you alluding to?"

After a nod from Barbara, the long-haired woman looked Ed straight in the face and asked, "I mean don't you feel guilty for letting your friend worry about Penguin's misery?"

Ed was taken aback. Of course he did.

"I..."

How could he be at a loss for words after boasting about his schemes seconds ago?

The voice inside his head answered promptly, Easy: You're not as heartless as you pretend to be. Don't lose sight of who you love, Eddie.

While Barbara and Tabitha looked at him expectantly, he gave a quick response, That's what I'm doing! Focusing on Oswald and on y/n! We texted quite often over the past weeks.

"Ed?"

"Yes!" He straightened his jacket, "What is it?"

Barbara patted his arm, "I think you're doing great!" She gave Tabitha a subtle look indicating that she knew he wasn't, "Look at you, protecting your friend from someone as dangerous and selfish as Oswald."

Hearing her put it like that...Perhaps he was protecting you from Oswald. The thought hadn't crossed his mind. While Ed believed that Oswald would never harm you, he hadn't suspected him to be Isabella's murderer either.

The thought of Oswald killing you seemed ridiculous but that didn't mean that Barbara's words had no impact.

He had loved Isabella and he loved you, at least as much as-at least a lot.

What if things had been different and Oswald had been jealous of you?

Ed pictured the scene: your lifeless body in the GCPD, a car accident report, Oswald telling him to move on when he was still mourning!

"You still with us, Ed? Cause you shouldn't-"

His telephone rang. 'Oswald Cobblepot'. "Speaking of the devil, who seems to have called...eight times, wow" he was glad to see they were now looking at him as if he was capable despite the zoning out, "he can suffer for a little longer." He clapped the device shut. "You were saying?"

Barbara was pleased that Ed was ignoring the probably miserable mayor, "I was saying...that you needn't feel bad about getting your revenge on Penguin. Just continue doing what you're doing and our plans will be a piece of cake." She laughed.

_________________

Oswald was anything but laughing. He stood on shaky legs, panting from walking quickly after finally...well, not getting rid of you but assuring you he'd be fine. Oh god, had he made you worry too much? He hoped not.

He looked back as if you might appear at any moment, then moved back to the door. It was best that you didn't disturb him. If his father's skeleton wasn't real, he'd look insane. He closed the door and locked it. Even if his father's remains were in the same place: you didn't need to see a corpse, beleagured enough as you already were.

He hadn't meant to alarm you. You suspected that he had harmed himself, for God's sake! Oswald limped to the place where he had last seen his father's body, determined to wash away the blood and show you how alright he was. At least physically...

The disheveled mayor opened the office cupboard and gasped in shock. It was empty and what was worse, the traces to Elijah's presence were gone.

"No!" Oswald clutched a hand in front of his mouth. "No no no no no, please don't let this be...please let it have been real... I need you, father! I need your advice. Come back to me!"

He closed the cupboard and looked around the room. Not a single trace of his father. Had he vanished...or never been there to begin with, a hallucination? Oswald was sleep-deprived.

Ed! Oswald was spurred into action. He pulled out his phone and called his number.

Ring.

Ring.

Ring.

Ri-

"This is Edward."

It normally didn't take this short for the voice message to start. Ed had declined the call.

"Leave a message. Or don't."

Right. There was the audible reminder of the sadness Oswald had caused the man he loved.

"Doesn't really matter."

Oswald rubbed his temples.

Perhaps Ed was busy. Or still not over it. Over receiving a love confession after making one of the oddest business proposals Oswald had ever witnessed. It was almost as if - he steadied himself on a table... It was a level of dumbness almost completely uncharacteristic for Ed.

Oswald took shaky breaths. Coming to rash conclusions wouldn't serve him well. He needed to approach this calmly, at least as calmly as he could.

He breathed in and made sure to let out enough air as well, as Ed has taught him. Taught me with a hand on my stomach to show my where best to breathe from, he thought puzzled, then remembered that the brown-haired man had done the same with you.

Suddenly Oswald had a thought. Could it be that Ed was in love with you both, that this was his reason for distancing himself from him? It would make sense, wouldn't it: Ed, still grieving Isabella, wouldn't want to confirm being in love with Oswald if it meant making you think he didn't like you, but he wouldn't want to confess to you either in fear of losing his other best friend.

Oswald knew the feeling. Right now he wished he had never said the words to Ed. He would to anything to have him back, even if as nothing more than a friend.

Thinking back brought Oswald's mood further down. Ed had been so shocked, his body averted from Oswald's as if the mere idea of the black-haired man as someone worth having romantic interest in displeased him.

Oh, Oswald wished to have him back, to prove that his affection was nothing to be afraid of, that Ed had no reason to tense up and shield himself.

Oswald would keep his feelings to himself. He could do that, yes, he'd let Ed dictate how close they got, so that things could go back to how they'd been.

Now if he could just solve the mystery of his father!

For a moment he considered calling Ed again, then he debated texting him and gave up on that as well. What would he even write? 'Hey, Ed, first of all: don't be afraid, I'm no danger to you. I know you haven't wanted to hear from me for weeks, but I think I might be hallucinating, so I thought I'd call the next insane person I know.'

No, that would simply be ridiculous. Not only that but there was a safety issue as well: Oswald couldn't afford the public questioning his sanity because of one thoughtless text falling into the wrong hands.

He pocketed his phone to keep from making a mistake, and actually went toward the bathroom, where he'd told you he'd be.

Despite everything, there was still hope. You neither knew about the situation with Ed nor about his possibly damaged psychological state, and as long as you stayed with him, he'd manage. He'd bottle up his emotions over the day and find a way to let them out when you weren't there. After today he couldn't afford to be seen by you in such a miserable state again.

That day in the library, Ed had promised not to speak a word of the love confession to you, telling Oswald that he deserved it, that it was completely rational, no, the best decision even: to keep it a secret. He had almost been eager to assure him. Maybe Oswald's theory was true and Ed was planning on eventually getting together with him and you. Yet he had been so shocked. Oswald gasped for breath. Could it be that...could it be that Ed was only in love with you?

With all that had happened it certainly wasn't implausible: the way Ed acted around you, looked at you, cared for you, all of it was filled with love, of whichever type that may be. In Oswald's dreams, all three of you had been in love with each other, never just with one, but knowing what Ed had told him...it might be true!

Oswald collided with the door to the private bathrooms. "Ow!" Rubbing his face, he turned around to make sure no one had heard him. The way there on his shaky legs had taken him long enough and he lacked the energy to look for a new place.

He hastily locked the door and turned to the big mirror.

"Oh God!"

He looked horrible!

Strands of hair had dropped and clung to his sweaty skin, his dark circles were reinforced by the mascara he thought he'd removed sometime yesterday in between glasses of alcohol, and his expression was utterly pathetic.

How could Ed love someone like this? How could you? Had Oswald only made himself look this bad after finding his father's remains missing?

In any case: you had wanted to know whether he'd self-harmed or worse, tried to kill himself, so he couldn't have looked alright.

God, his whole existence was a mess: losing bis best friend because the thought of Oswald loving him was too much for the tall brown-haired genius, losing the public because his father who might just be a hallucination was asking things of him, and now looking like this! His eyes watered again. Of course Ed wouldn't settle for him!

He approached the sink and poured the first wave of water onto his face.

Whether he was handsome in general or not, he was unsightly today. Possibly this week. Hopefully it didn't go back to since Ed had left.

He poured another handful of water over his face.

Of course Ed doesn't love me.

He attempted to wash the make-up smudges away.

And why would you love him?

He began to rub at the mascara remains on his eyelids.

Why did you still care for him?

The mascara didn't budge.

What was keeping you from going to Ed, genius, tall and handsome Ed?

Maybe you would soon.

What would Oswald do then?!

He wouldn't kill you, that was out of the question. Just thinking about how concerned you already were made him feel guilty.

No, he wouldn't harm you, wouldn't even think about manipulating your relationship with Ed. He'd be your friend, watch as Ed got back the love Oswald had stolen from him, and as your concern for Oswald was washed away by Ed's love.

Finally seeing you happy would have to be compensation enough.

Only that you'd probably still worry about him, wouldn't you? Try and ask what's wrong, then support your friend without ever being entrusted with his secret problem, that's what you'd do, and God, it would make things ten times more heartbreaking for Oswald! He couldn't fall out of love with you! If he still loved Ed, who'd broken off all contact, then how would he be able to let go of much more innocent you, how would he endure seing the two people he loved daily?

Surely Ed would come back to the Van Dahl estate if he became your boyfriend...or would living with his friend be too weird if he was in a relationship? Ed had brought Isabella to the mansion but maybe he'd prefer to settle down in his own house, move in with you and leave Oswald alone?

That would be horrible! Except...maybe he'd need the distraction, the time for himself to cry without making either of you worry.

At the thought a next wave of tears spilled from his eyes.

I'd live with it somehow, he told himself. I love them too much to break off contact, he thought, even as sobs shook his body.

_________________

Ed's phone rang again. He made a show out of ignoring it but as soon as Barbara looked away to "Tabby", he threw a look at it. It was you.

"I need to answer this." His fingers were already itching to press the button.

"You do that," Barbara saw your name on the screen, then lowered her voice, "and don't forget: you need to protect the last person you love. Oswald doesn't care about the people - as he so elegantly told the whole city - or those he loves. But I don't need to tell you that."

She padded his shoulder and tugged Tabitha along, and after Basil Karlo had left the three alone, only Ed remained, who hastily took the call.

____________

Author's note: I'm back again! I've gotta be careful that I don't overwork myself with this fic. These last weeks it was kind of difficult to continue not just because I was busy & then ill but cause I felt like publishing it didn't pay off (both tumblr & A03 formatting takes more time than I'd like & writing for a niche couple in an old fandom doesn't help with getting comments either 🥲 But don't worry, I get that not everyone has the energy to comment :))

Next chapter->

[dustbon]

🎊 Basil and Lavina tied the knot 🎊

So the household got a slight age time jump and everyone's an adult-adult now (Flora lost a hand in the process). Since Lavina is coming with us, I made Rahul the new Mayor so Henford won't spiral into NPC madness.

Lavina has like 3 days left as an adult, so let's start mission nooboo before she becomes a wrinkly raisin :D

✅ Marry the Mayor

[silversims]

Celestial: You'll be on your own, with Mayor Basil and with Parsley, with no way to get out in a hurry and no backup if things go south!

Peridot: buuuuut it'll be in the station and I can scream really really loudly! Not every officer is on the take, right?

[thequietkid-moonie]

Meeting someone on the rooftop of the hospital

[ ONE SHOT ] [ Sunny ] [ Omori ]

⚠️ This contain mayor spoilers from Omori

⚠️ Mention of suicide attempt

It's totally not me thinking about unalive myself 😶

I think that all the endings of the game are pretty interesting and really acurate for what happen!! The creator really made a good job!!

I really got reflexive, maybe this is a little vent but don't matter, I hope you enjoy it! 😙

No matter how much time it pass the guilt Sunny feel doesn't go away, in fact it had just become more dificult to bear, he had get enough and just let himself fall into de despair

Climbing the stairs towards the rooftop without thinking in anything else aside from putting an end to all of this, is the only thing he wants right now, he just can't continue fighting

His body was practically moving alone when he reach the top of the stairs and open the door of the rooftop, but he was stoped by something he never expected to see, there were someone else, someone dressed in a hospital gown similar to his, someone who was on the edge but just looking at the view

He was really shocked, Sunny had been trapped in his own world for so long that he had just forgot about the rest of the world, he never expected, or even thought that he could meet someone in a similar situation (aside from Basil)

When you had noticed him you just had greet him with a smile, inviting over to look at the view of the city with you, he isn't unfamiliar to kindness but he never expected to be accepted in this state, and again, without thinking much, his body slowly approaches to you. You two spend a while just watching to nothing in particular without saying anything, not a single word, Sunny can't help but wonder what you were doing there (even when thinks he knows the answer)

When you ask him if he was planning to do it too he was taken aback, you seem in peace righ now so why will you want to jump? and how do you know that he was planning on doing it? he isn't the type to express his problems and still you had read him like an open book

This was one of the only times his facial expression showed how surprised he was, and you were quickly to reasure him, although not knowing exactly what to say, maybe you say that you just suspected that that was the reason that bring him here or you reveal that that was your reason for being there

Sunny was so taken aback that he didn't know what else to do or say, so he just stay there by your side while you talk. You start saying that life isn't easy, that you feel like it would be better if you weren't there, just put an end to everything probably would be better, but for some reason you always find a reason to not do it, maybe you were just too coward or maybe there were really reasons to continue fighting

Why is a question you don't manage to answer yet, and you want to make sure you won't regret it on the middle of the way, when it were too late. Maybe that were the reason you were there, being so close to what you want but still with the option to decline it gives you peace

Everyone says that things will get better but is really getting better? how will you know if things are getting better? If you ask him he won't be able to answer to that either, he doesn't even had pay attention to rest of the world, but what you said make him remember how Mary had teach him to calm down and focus when he started to be afraid and how she used to tell him that everything will be fine, maybe things don't get better but for some reason that always comforted him

Unlike at what it was expected Sunny was paying a lot of attention, but what you were saying was something he had really never considered, again it was because he was trapped in his own world

None of you really noticed how much attention he was paying to you, but when you do you were quickly to apologize for venting to him, you were sorry for bothering him but is just that the moment felt perfect to share this, and you admitted that you didn't remember when was the last time you had the opportunity to talk to someone with such sincerity, heck you don't remember if there was even an oportunity to do so

You were right, when it was the last time he had talk about this?, the only people he dare to talk with about this kind stuff was his sister Mary, but he killed her, and his best friend Basil, but he turned away from him when he insolate himself, not even to himself since he had been trying to avoid all of those feelings, the guilt was starting to get unbearable but when was the last time he tried to face it or talk about it?

You two spend some time just watching the view from the rooftop, mostly in silence, you just say some coments from time to time, but that was enough to make him wonder if the things were really like he think of them, he had been all this time fearing that his friends will blame him and hate him for Mary's death, but if a stranger that doesn't even know his name accept him at his lowest maybe things won't go as bad as he thinks

At some point you two say goodbye and wish luck in your lifes for both before going back inside of the hospital, and even when you had go away your words get stuck on Sunny's mind, he had just realice that he isn't alone, in this world are people that understand how he feels even when the situation isn't the same or even when you don't express it directly

Maybe this wasn't the moment to jump, maybe this wasn't even a good option, Sunny doesn't have the answer to everything and he still fears the future and what will bring him, but right now he think that maybe it won't be that bad to give a try and continue fighting

He knows that the chances are minimal but he can't help but wonder if he will be able to see you again, he should thank you for give him motivation to continue at least one more day

[marvanne111]

moments I love in "Tempting Fête"

"I can only read what I've got written down, Mr. Funt." "Councilor Funt! -Funn, Councilor Funn."

the fact that it's been 11 years of this Funn/ Funt debate (alternatively, that both the reverend and the mayor have addressed him properly the last three episodes and seemed to have no problem with it)

"Yes, well, I'll see what I'm doing that day" -leading the funeral, one would hope?

underrated bit of the series in general: cell service only being available in the reverend's bathroom

"I think he's quite dishy" (this scratches such an itch in my brain; I quote it once a week)

the mayor and reverend (who will be dating by the end of the episode) agreeing emphatically with the above statement

the reverend wearing eye shadow! (incredible, show stopping, spectacular, never been seen before)

"It was one mouse! and, and I don't know anything about it"

"All opposed?" "... I mean, I'd say opposed is a strong word-" "Done! Carried unanimously!"; "All opposed? "I, uh-" "Overruled! Motion carried!"

"We already have an identity: it's miserable and it works." (i want this on a t-shirt)

"There hasn't been a fête for eleven years." "Astonishing. Who's in charge of local events?" "Rudyard." "Ah."

"Look, it's easy to throw money around and get excited about rustic dancing, but we've got-" "I'LL SAY IT IS!"

"His world had once again become an increasingly scary place. There was only one thing left to do..." "Georgie?" "Yeah?" "We're emigrating."; "It was time for swift and decisive action, and there was only one place to head for: Reverend Wavering's bathroom"; at the funeral I was able to witness Rudyard, bereft of Reverend and with few attendees, deliver a stirring and entirely improvised speech about the circuities of fate, the struggles of discord, and an intractable acceptance of the way the cookie crumbles, a sermon that moved the late Basil Corbett’s niece to say, quite simply:" "We want our money back" (some really fantastic narration moments in this one that make me giggle every time)

Rudyard including Madeleine in the emigration plans is said so sweetly and it honestly makes me a little soft

"One word: Chapman." "I should return his calls-" "Chapman?" "- probably won't, though"

"Rudyard, other people do those things for you!" "Conscription?" "Volunteering!"

"I, I, I do like spreadsheets!"

(No Madeleine, I hate raffles!") (these posts are always so Rudyard-centric lol and it's helped me come to the conclusion that he really is the funniest)

"Do you know how many gallons of fluid I'll have to drain from a man that size? Possibly thousands!" "What a ridiculous lie!" (this is another one that I quote often lol)

"I wish I were Mrs. Carnegie!" "You will be, Mrs, Turner. You will be." (WHAT IS THIS RESPONSE?!)

"Fancy a funeral?" "That a threat?"; "Don't forget your funeral." "Was that a threat?"

"Socializing? That'd take up ten minutes and then what would they do? No. Perpetual scheduled activity, that's the way."

"Put some clothes on!" "IT'S MY HOUSE!"

"Antigone?" "What?!" "Helicopters!" "Go back to your side of the table."

"Now get over there and sabotage something!" "*sigh* Fine." "Do you really think that's going to help?" "Oh maybe not, but it'll cheer me up."

"Called up the family, made up a story about... well, re-organizing a fête, that sort of thing." "How did they react?" "Well, they weren't very happy..." "But?" "No, that's it, they weren't very happy."

"You know, I can actually see your future." "Oh yes?" "Mmm hmm. And it involves this crystal ball getting shoved STRAIGHT up your-"

"Alright sir! Mission accomplissshhhhed." "Hello, Georgie." "Hello..." "Get out, Georgie." "Goodbye..."

The Mayor trying to rustic dance for a couple of hours before giving up

Lady Templar's glass eye. (That's it. That's the post.)

"He'd be spinning in the grave you haven't put him in yet!" (best line of the episode honestly)

"What a dreadful little man!" "Yes... mind you, he looks good in a suit"

"Even in a crowd, they all look lonely" (🤌🤌🤌)

"Can't win 'em all" 'Winning anything at all would be a nice change." (also want this on a t-shirt)

"You like to be the hero, don't ya?" (Georgie's the GOAT)

"Rudyard. Do you know what this chap did?" "Yes, he told me" (my man is already so tired of Eric lol)

[androxys]

Okay, I've watched the first two episodes of The Caped Crusader and am really enjoying everything that I'm seeing so far. It's obviously a send up to the Golden Age (which was a lot more dark and noir than I think people remember), from details like character designs to the general vibe of an early Batman.

One concern about telling stories with an early Batman, though, is the question of how to continue to show us characters we've known for decades, written by creators who have been making these stories for decades, without it feeling like something you've already seen before. That requires reinvention, and new twists on old characters! And I think an animated series like this is a good format for it.

I'm seeing some criticism for the show float around online, but I feel like a lot of the criticism I'm seeing so far tends to come from a place where people wanted this to be another BTAS. Which I suppose I get, since I also love BTAS. But this... isn't that. I feel like I took one look at it and saw "oh, Bruce Timm is trying something different." So lean into letting yourself see what's new.

All of this to say, so far I've been pleased! I've put a few specific details for Episodes 1-2 below the cut, so if you're strict about spoilers just move along.

I like this iteration of the Penguin. Bruce describes her as hiding in plain sight, and it's an interesting play on Oswald's typical need to be seen as powerful or be respected. I don't think that this isn't the case for Oswalda, but she seems to keep a cooler head and get farther for it. I'm hoping she comes back in later episodes, because I want to see her begin taking over organized crime as we continue on the traditional journey of old-fashioned organized crime (Rupert Thorne) give way to the costumed criminal.

I'm really fascinated by this Harvey Dent. Relentlessly campaigning for mayor and decidedly not the white knight figure we usually think of pre-acid Harvey being, I think his dynamic with Barbara and then Renee (in an episode penned by Rucka, of course) really pays off. Here is more of the ego that you may assume Penguin to have. He's obviously a bit of a ringleader among the many crooked cops of Gotham (which, I'm glad Bullock is. This is early Bullock. He sucks at first, then sucks but more ethically) and will continue to play off them as he tries to assume power.

I thought the aesthetics of this Clayface were really well done, and a good example of wondering how you keep old faces fresh. Once Basil Karlo's name was on screen, we knew Clayface was going to be the villain. And while some people would have been perfectly pleased with seeing the same mud-man plodding across the screen, I liked that they refreshed him and gave him a little more of a Phantom of the Opera feel! It leaned on his history as The Terror, and I think it worked out.

Barbara as a public defender is interesting. It lets her be in a position to try to help people, but I'm so incredibly biased and want her to always be a librarian when possible. I'm curious how her interest in justice will intersect with capes and cowls.

And oh, Renee. My beloved. I'm so glad you got back-ported into the Golden Age-ish-ness of it all. If Gordon is already in charge of the police, Batman needs someone to play off of who's making their way through corrupt Gotham City. I think Renee was a good choice for this, because we know enough about her to have some expectations, and then we'll be able to have those expectations subverted.

[dandylion240]

Basil Rake

Age: 24

Siblings: only child

Lives in Appaloosa Plains

Random Facts

Basil is the only son of the mayor of Appaloosa Plains. He's always been under the scrutiny of others whether it's his parents or the community he lives in. Nothing he does ever goes unnoticed. He hates crowds and having to appear in public.

He's developed a bit of a reputation as a rebel. He's been caught smoking, drinking, drag racing anything really to get a rush and so far he hasn't gotten into trouble that his parents couldn't pay to get him out of.

Now that he's older he's a bit less prone to seeking ways of getting into trouble or maybe it was his time away in military school but he sometimes has break out and do something reckless like maybe date the daughter of one of his parents oldest friends.

[xpuigc-bloc]

Exquisite esquites

By Mia Leimkuhler

If I were mayor of Picnictown, every picnic would have the following: a blanket, a 1:1 dog-to-human ratio and esquites. The blanket’s there because grass is itchy no matter what the most outdoorsy person in the group says; the dogs because dogs are great. The esquites are essential because my favorite outdoor corn is elotes, but they don’t travel nearly as well as esquites. (The laws of Picnictown consider how easy it is to carry your picnic things on public transportation.)

This is barely a compromise, though, because Kay Chun’s esquites capture all the beloved and balanced elements of elotes: sweet summer corn, tangy lime, creamy cotija (and crema), spicy ancho chile. The smoky flavor you get from grilled corn is here, too, as the kernels are charred in a hot skillet until browned and caramelized. Perhaps the most enticing part of the recipe is this note from Kay: “Leftovers transform quickly into a great pasta salad the next day; simply toss with cooked pasta and olive oil.” Picnictown loves a resourceful pasta salad.

More picnic decrees, because it’s the first day of summer! Make Zainab Shah’s sheet-pan chicken tikka thighs ahead of time, and then toss some roti or naan in your tote bag for effortless but extremely delicious sandwiches. Ali Slagle’s green bean salad with dill pickles and feta is perfect all by itself, but if someone else wanted to bring a container of cooked barley or farro, that would be a really nice collaborative grain bowl picnic moment. (For even more lovely, easy picnic ideas that travel well, check out this recipe collection.)

Every June, the summer produce flows into and overwhelms my corner grocery store, and every June I am positively giddy about it. Right now the shelves are buckling from so many cherry tomatoes, and I’m doing my part with salad e-shirazi, basil and tomato fried rice and salmon and tomatoes in foil, a five-star, five-ingredient dinner from Mark Bittman.

I am trying to be more adventurous with my vegetables, branching out and bringing home goodies I don’t usually cook. I’ve never really loved bitter melon (I’m not alone), but I do like bitter things — extra dark chocolate, dandelion greens, Campari. So I’m going to try this stir-fried bitter melon with eggs, a recipe from Chutatip Suntaranon (known as Nok) adapted by Cathy Erway.

The creamy scrambled eggs, salty soy sauce and molasses-y brown sugar will mellow out the harshest edges of the bitter melon. And I trust Nok — I’ve had the pleasure of dining at Kalaya, Nok’s restaurant in Philadelphia, and Nok never misses.

Lastly: It’s hot out there, and I’d like to give you an excuse to stand in front of the open refrigerator after a long afternoon in Picnictown. Here’s Lisa Donovan’s new recipe for buttermilk tres leches cake, which is best served extremely chilled, straight from the pan. I interpret this as spooning giant mouthfuls of cold, creamy cake into my mouth while bending into the fridge, but if you’d like to use plates and forks and a table, by all means.

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[the-journey-was-the-point]

Last Day of the Farmer's Faire (for me)

And I dedicated it to spending the last of my tokens and goofing off!

CANNONBALLLLLLL

Everyone look my cow can swim she's so talented she's the bestest cow in the world 🥺🥰

Look she's cheering me on!! 🥺🥺🥺 I like to think her mooing while I threw rotten cabbages at the bounder was her way of telling me to stop antagonizing Hobbit law enforcement.

We sang for the mayor and also cheered him on. Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!

YOSHI!????!

I love Shire quests. They're so chill and also I really just like food and cooking games. This event was so fun and relaxing. I'll probably stay a while and do my crafts. Then go to Celondim, then back to Forochel. Then uh. Main quest in Angmar XD

I'm thinking I should start doing my grocery list like a Hobbit. 🤔 Here I go!

Coffee: I much prefer bolder flavors! Chicken: Chicken breast is one of the most flexible ingredients you can have. You can put it in pasta, a sandwich, and use it for a variety of recipes! That's why I always keep a stock of chicken breast. Unfortunately we ran out. But then again, I'm getting a little tired of the taste and could go for a crunchy fried chicken leg! Tomatoes: Cherry tomatoes are perfect for pasta! You cook em with garlic, onions, olive oil, and it's heavenly. But who even has the time for that, I'll just buy bottled sauce some other time. Bread: Crusty bread is best with stew. It's been hot lately though, so just regular white bread, please. Herbs: I like to put basil in my pasta, so I usually buy a pack. It only makes sense though if I'm having pasta. Toothpaste: Nah I'm good!

And that's it for the Farmer's Faire!

He burped. Ha ha ha!

[youngandwild99-blog1]

The Batman Part II: My Theories

Please take this with a block of salt because as of right now all we have are rumors. Maybe take that block of salt home to your cows :)

Theory #1: Clayface

So, word is that Clayface may appear as the main villain in Part II. I've noticed some people in various comment sections being doubtful, because a giant shapeshifting monster made out of clay is a sharp left turn from the "grounded realism" of the first movie. They make a good point, which is why I predict that, if Clayface is actually going to appear, he'll be based on the Golden Age version. This was Basil Karlo, a failed actor who took on the alter ego of Clayface, a villain he used to play, to kill various actors and was thwarted by Batman and Robin.

Now, having two serial killer villains in a row would be repetitive, so I theorize that this Clayface will take a different approach. Imagine Basil Karlo using his skills in impressions and makeup (maybe a cutting-edge prosthetic face mask called a "clay face") to impersonate celebrities in Gotham, only to purposefully get caught in scandals. The real celebrity insists it wasn't them, but it's too late, and they're effectively "killed" in the courtroom of public opinion. And Clayface didn't even need to lay a finger on them.

Meanwhile, Bruce Wayne is finally trying to develop his public image after ~20 years, only to discover a villain with the ability to singlehandedly undo all his progress in the eyes of Gotham. In the comics, this would be the part where Batman and Robin are on the case, which leads me to...

Theory #2: Robin

We haven't had a well-received Boy Wonder on the big screen since Burt Ward played him in 1966. If you're anything like me, that's pretty damn frustrating (Dick Grayson appeared in the comics before the Joker AND before Alfred!). So hearing this rumor of Dick Grayson appearing in Part II is both exciting and nerve-wracking, because writing a believable child sidekick in a "grounded, realistic" superhero movie is a challenge. Just logistically, it works in stories like Logan or The Last of Us, because X-23 is immortal and can shrug off most injuries, while Joel eventually taught Ellie how to shoot. But with Batman and Robin, you have a very-much-mortal kid wearing a colorful costume going up against the kinds of people who quite literally emptied their magazines into Batman's chest last movie. How do you make that character fit believably into the world you've made?

Obviously the only ones who can answer that question are Matt Reeves and Mattson Tomlin, the writers for Part II. But I'd be lying if I said I didn't notice some ways that Dick Grayson might've been set up in The Batman. First off: the mayor's son. Bats interacts with him three times throughout the movie. He saves the kid's life twice, once as Bruce and once as Batman. Furthermore, the mayor's son is the first civilian to trust Batman after the flood: he walks towards Bats first, and everyone else follows. In the wise words of Red from OSP, if you can't imagine your Batman comforting a scared child, then you haven't written Batman, you've written the Punisher in a funny hat.

Second: HBO's Penguin series. The fact that they're introducing other gangsters from the comics (Sofia and Alberto Falcone, Salvatore Maroni) gives me hope that they might take the opportunity to introduce Tony Zucco, the gangster who killed Dick Grayson's parents. There are quite a few actors cast in undisclosed roles, maybe one of them plays Zucco...? Either way, setting up Zucco's extortion of Haly's Circus in The Penguin and following it up in Part II with the Flying Graysons' murders would be a good way to tie those stories together.

Third: Bruce Wayne's reappearance. Part I was all about Batman discovering that he has to be more than vengeance, and Reeves has said we'll be seeing more of Bruce Wayne in Part II. Perhaps Bruce's first major public appearance is attending a performance by Haly's Circus, and he just so happens to witness the deaths of the Flying Graysons. And we know what happens next. What better way to force Bruce to take his image seriously (aside from Clayface's shenanigans) than for him to suddenly have an angry, traumatized, highly impressionable kid in his life?

Fourth: This is the weakest reason, but at the end of the movie Selina mentions she's moving to Blüdhaven, which also happens to be where Dick Grayson goes after growing up and becoming Nightwing.

That turned out longer than I thought it would be. Again, these are all just rumors, but I wanted to put my thoughts and theories down in writing in an organized way, and to see what anyone else thinks. Thank you for reading.