#maybe the secret to writing the fic i should be writing is second person POV

[pomefioredove]

now I'm actually invested in this idea. maybe I'll write a full length fic someday idk... for now I have short hcs

parts 1 | 2 | 3 | kalim | bad ending

summary: crowley decides to "give away" yuu to the highest "donation" for financial reasons type of post: headcanons characters: all nrc students additional info: can be read as platonic or romantic, except malleus is pretty romantic, second person pov, yuu is gender neutral, maybe a little ooc I wrote this as soon as I got up

crowley has had his fair share of "what the fuck" moments from you but this was really taking the cake

he acts so... casual about it?

swaggers into ramshackle one morning and says times are tough and your personal expenses are straining the budget so he's decided to "put you in someone else's care"

"The screening process will be vigorous to make sure you end up in good hands!" like you're a cat or something "Your expenses will be covered and you'll have somewhere to go during break!"

okay great. pretty obvious you have no say in this, so you don't even argue. what's the worst that could happen?

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Ace, Deuce, Jack, and Epel find you the next day to say they're pooling their money to buy you

"To what?"

Epel shrugs. "Oh, well Crowley said we need to offer a donation to prove we're capable of supporting you..."

(you think that if not for the laws of this land you would have slaughtered that old fart)

Jack goes on a really long tirade about how shady and underhanded this is, making sure to reaffirm that he believes you should be free to make your own choices

"So you'll let me go once you get me?"

"Uhhh..."

Ace thinks once they buy you you'll have no choice but to do all of his homework for him

Deuce says that's not really how it works- and even if he tried, Riddle would kill him

(they've already gone over this twice before finding you)

Epel happily volunteers to take you home with him over breaks, probably the only positive in this mess

even if he thinks the whole thing is kind of funny

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

incapable of keeping his mouth shut, Ace accidentally spills the plan to Riddle, who is understandably aghast

you can't just give away a person under your care like a toy!

of all the irresponsible things...

of course, he'll have to put up his offer, too

purely for your sake! with a nicer room and a brand new copy of the dorm rules, maybe you'll stop getting yourself into trouble

he's got some family money (doctors, naturally) and considers this a worthwhile purchase, for his sanity and yours

of course, Trey and Cater overhear and may or may not be pooling their own cash for a chance, too

going behind Riddle's back on this is a risky venture, but hey, someone's gotta be on your side, here, right?

I mean, between a bunch of sixteen year old boys, the housewarden, and them, who would you choose?

actually don't answer that

...not that it's much of a secret, anyway. Cater's already got their gofundme equivalent link in bio

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Leona initially plans to have you become a live-in lackey like Ruggie

but then he really starts thinking- and, hey, the possibilities are endless, right?

for one, you'd make a really good pillow

he might have to kick Grim out for your full attention, but you could learn to live with that

and malleus would hate it

...that's reason enough for him

plus, he's got money to burn, so why not?

either way, he sets his bid at a reasonable (maybe too confident) price and sits back to watch the chaos unfold as everyone scrambles for a piece of the pie

news travels fast around school, after all

then Ruggie finds out that you could dethrone him as Leona's #2 and is understandably a little annoyed

that's his cushy post-grad job gig, thank you! he's worked hard for that!

besides, why should Leona get to hoard you? the guy can barely take care of himself!

so, Ruggie ends up outsourcing to a few dozen classmates for the necessary funds at a steep I-owe-you price

he's gonna be eating nothing but dandelions for a while...

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

now, Azul is annoyed

once the news goes school-wide, it's all anyone can talk about

talk about good marketing...

why didn't he think of such a brilliant scam? he could have negotiated with Crowley to have a café brand deal tie-in!

of course, he's already set his bid, with Jade and Floyd offering to pitch in as necessary

it's a risky investment, sure, but a worthwhile one

Azul tells everyone that with the prefect's "obvious" popularity, having them at the café a few nights a week would drive sales through the roof

though that's really just what he says to shirk suspicion

a likely excuse coming from him, though, really, it would just be nice having you around

and if not for his own affections, Floyd's incessant begging and Jade's subtly manipulative comments about "how nice" it would be having a new face around would be enough for him to cave eventually

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

"Kalim, no," is the first thing that Jamil says

"I strongly advise against this. It's another one of Crowley's silly scams and you could end up a target bec- are you even listening?"

hint: he is not

the second Kalim found out that he could get to take in his favorite magicless student like one of his treasures, he was all over it

(AKA infinite sleepovers)

and for what? a little optional donation to prove he's got the funds? he's got cash to spare!

he's already got your new room in Scarabia set up before he even puts his bid in

right next to his of course :)

and despite what Jamil insists, he himself might be working behind the curtain just a little to ensure he's the one who ends up with you

after all, why should Kalim get everything? this might be a valuable learning opportunity for him

You don't always get what you want

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

as much as Epel tries to keep the rest of his dorm from finding out, it's inevitable

he's actually a little surprised that the news didn't get to Vil sooner

with Rook around campus, surely he must have said something...

when Vil does find out, though, he just sighs

oh, of course. what next, will everyone meet each other in the arena and fight to the death over the prefect?

of all the silly, immature things...

oh? what's that? he's bidding anyway? of course he is, silly potato. he can't have some unwashed miscreant making you sleep on polyester bedding

(really, he's the only person on campus worthy of your time)

Rook has also been mysteriously absent from the dorm lately, though his initials on a poem and a strangely large sum of money end up in the donation pile

but really, that could be anyone... Rook would never dare betray Vil again, right?

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Ortho finds out directly from the other first years and sends Idia the details immediately

with a little note of encouragement, of course: "could be excellent for improving your social skills!"

Idia understandably freaks out

"WTF!!!! nooo way! this is a person, not a chatbot we're talking about here! I can barely keep virtual pets alive!!!!"

(liar)

(...but this is still different)

the conversation ends there, but semi-anonymous bid from someone named "gloomurai" gets cashapp'd directly to crowley

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

everyone in the room immediately turns to Malleus

"For the record, I think it's wrong to be bargaining over a human being," Silver says first. "But if anyone could handle it with grace, it's you."

Lilia laughs. "Oh, you're just saying that because you like the prefect so much!"

"Father, you're the one who likes the prefect so much,"

"Oh, right! carry on then. After all, I'm sure we could share,"

Sebek is the only one relatively against the idea, though Lilia luckily manages to get him to lower his voice after his third speech about how you aren't good enough for his liege

Malleus is rather quiet through the whole evening, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with any of the points made

he disappears for a short while, and when he comes back he seems a little more confident

though, of course, he goes to you first

seeing him at Ramshackle in the middle of the night is a familiar and welcoming sight after all of the chaos of your week

and he's in a great mood!

"Child of man! I've come with news," he says. "I have heard of your predicament and have come up with a solution!"

you immediately sulk. "Oh, no. You know I think this whole thing is terrible, right?"

"Yes, Silver mentioned you might not like the idea of being bought and sold like a trinket. But worry not, I do not plan on paying for you in money,"

you pause, at a loss for words, and then tentatively continue. "You're not...?"

"Of course not. What a primitive idea, I was baffled to hear it myself. My proposal will be more traditional: a modest sum of treasure, and a generous amount of livestock and the finest crop Briar Valley can offer,"

certainly he's not this naive, you think

"You really think Crowley is going to accept that over money? I'm pretty sure Kalim just bid away an entire country's worth,"

he laughs. "You speak as if this is some kind of business deal! I'm quite confident that my dowry will be best,"

huh. that was a strange way of putting it

but then again, you still didn't really understand how things work here, so you go along with it

and you allow yourself to relax. he seems confident in his offer, and he doesn't even see you as some kind of prize to win!

"Oh, well, alright. Thanks! I'm glad you're on it,"

he smiles. "Rest assured, child of man, you're in good hands. My dowry will far outshine the others, and the wedding will be even better,"

"I was honestly getting a little nervous for a momen- wait- wedding!?"

[bad268]

Love your writingg!!

Could you write a oneshot with ollie when reader couldn't make it to a race and she got sick while at home but didnt tell ollie cuz it couldve made him shit the race and he comes back home at takes care of herr??

+hiii!! idk if ure still taking request, but maybe an ollie x reader where she gets her wisdom tooth out and the aftermath is just her being chaotic and funny while ollie just goes with everything.

but yeah, i think it’s pretty cute. thank you!

Boyfriend Of The Year (Ollie Bearman X Reader)

Fandom: RPF/F2/F3

Requested: Clearly (I just did a sick fic, so i decided to incorporate these. Hope yall don't mind <3)

Warnings: Wisdom teeth surgery and recovery

POV: Majority Second Person (You/your), some Third Person (They/them)

W.C. 2301

Summary: A routine dentist appointment turns into a secret to keep Ollie sane.

As always, my requests are OPEN

MASTERLIST // HITLIST

~~(^Pinterest)

Your phone was blowing up with texts from Ollie. He was probably wondering where you were at this point since you promised to be at the qualifying session, but due to a dentist appointment scheduled between the sessions, you had to split up. Ollie and his dad drove together, and you took an uber to your appointment. Well, at that dentist appointment, you found out that your chronic jaw pain was actually your wisdom teeth getting dangerous. They were growing inwards and pressing your teeth, so your dentist strongly encouraged an emergency wisdom teeth removal for the same day. Ollie was going to be pissed and you knew it.

“Hey, CareBear,” You greeted in a fake tone. You were still at the dentist, but you stepped outside to get a little bit of privacy. “What’s up?”

“Don’t ‘Hey CareBear’ me! Where are you? You said you were gonna be here,” Ollie asked. He was finally able to let out a breath after running around the paddock trying to find where you were. When he couldn’t find you, he started asking around, but no one had seen you. Then, he started calling you, and coincidentally, the calls were during your x-rays or consultation, so you were not answering. It was driving him insane. “Are you almost here?” 

“The dentist was short-staffed, so they haven't gotten me in yet,” You came up with on the fly. You knew he would hate that you lied to him, but he would also throw his entire race weekend away for you. Yes, it was adorable and it’s part of what made you love him, but this was not the time to be a loving boyfriend. This was the time to show everyone why he deserved the Haas seat. He could be boyfriend of the year afterward. “I can text you when I’m done, but I need to see them today. You know how bad my jaw has been hurting lately.”

“Oh?” Ollie smirked as he lowered his voice, about to make a joke but his dad walked right past him.

“Don’t even start, Oliver,” You pressed as you saw your dentist gesturing for you to come back in, so they could prepare you for the surgery. “Listen, CareBear, I gotta go. I think they’re ready to take me back. I’ll text your dad to pick me up when we start wrapping up. You need to get back for debrief or start preparing for quali.”

“Yeah, I should probably eat something,” Ollie said to himself as he scratched the back of his neck. He had never had to go into qualifying without you, so he was a bit nervous. However, he totally understood that this was something you needed to do. “I’ll get on pole for you.”

“I expect you in the top 22, nothing less,” You joked as you both said goodbye and hung up the call. You headed back inside as they started giving you the rundown on how the surgery would occur. For once, you were thankful for scheduling your appointment in the morning and not eating beforehand. Just before they would put you under, you decided to call Ollie’s dad. It didn’t take long for him to answer.

“Hey, Y/n,” David greeted immediately as he walked toward the back of the garage, “Need me to pick you up? That was awfully quick.”

“Actually no,” You chuckled nervously. “Don’t tell Ollie until after quali, but I’m getting my wisdom teeth out right now. If we tell him, he’s going to freak out.”

“Was this the plan the whole time?” He asked, quieting down as Ollie walked by nonethewiser. He was finishing up before he would be getting in the car, so he had enough on his plate, in your opinion.

“No, I just found out that the jaw pain I thought was the start of TMJ was actually my wisdom teeth growing inwards,” You explained with a smile as you watched your dentist finish setting everything out. “Listen, David, I’ll need you to pick me up in like an hour. Maybe after qualifying break it to him? Or just let him figure it out when I’m loopy. I really don’t care.”

“I’ll take care of him, don’t worry,” David reassured as he saw Ollie gesturing for him to come over before he would get in the car. “Have them call me when you’re done, and we’ll pick you up.”

You thanked him before ending the call and heading into the back where the operation would take place. 

The qualifying session went by quickly for Ollie because it was basically a one-lap shot. Right after the first laps, it started pouring rain, so when Ollie was at the top of the timing page, no one was able to beat him. He tried to call you as soon as he got out of the car, but every call went straight to voicemail. It freaked him out a little, but he brushed it off, thinking you were still getting your cleaning. It wasn’t until his dad was ushering him to change and get to the car park almost as soon as he wrapped up media that he started thinking something was wrong. Ollie sat nervously in the passenger seat as his dad drove in silence, which was completely unusual for him, so he decided to try and break the tension.

“So, dad,” He dragged out as he looked over at his dad. They pulled up to a red light, and David looked at Ollie. “Where are we going?”

“The dentist,” David said simply as he moved the car into first gear when the light changed. “We need to pick Y/n up.”

“Shouldn’t they have finished up during quali?” Ollie asked before muttering to himself, “I thought they would have been in the garage by the end of media.”

“They had to get some work done,” David responded. It was light-hearted, so Ollie wasn’t too worried. When they pulled up, he parked the car but made no move to get out for a second, causing Ollie to look over confused. “They had to get their wisdom teeth out.”

“What? Why didn’t you tell me?” Ollie freaked out, immediately getting out of the car and trying to reach the front door before his dad. Unfortunately for him, his dad anticipated this and beat him to the punch by blocking the door. “Dad, let me in.”

“No, you need to understand why we didn’t tell you,” David pressed as he put a hand on Ollie's shoulder and sheered him back toward the car. “They didn’t want you to be nervous in qualifying. It’s getting to the end of your season, and next year, you’ll be in F1. Everyone’s eyes are on you, and the last thing they wanted was for you to get nervous and risk your position in the championship.”

“That makes no sense! I wouldn’t have thrown the session!” Ollie disputed as he threw his hands up.

“Oh, please,” David tsked, “You almost crashed the car when you found out they had a headache a few months ago. Of course, you wouldn’t completely compromise your qualifying session knowing they were getting surgery. That sounds totally believable to me.” 

“Maybe you have a point,” Ollie mumbled as he dripped his hands to his sides in defeat. He looked back over to his dad as he sighed, “Can we go in now?”

“Are you going to cause a scene?”

“No.”

~

POV Switch-Third POV

All the while, Y/n was just waking up. The team had wrapped up the surgery at the end of qualifying and called David, saying he didn’t need to rush since they still needed to ween Y/n off of the meds and they still needed to pass the memory tests.

Y/n didn’t remember even waking up, but they did semi-register people walking in, around, and out of their room. Most of them were dentists or nurses checking their vitals, but then two people walked in that didn’t look like a dentist or nurse. It was Ollie and David, but Y/n was still too out of it to recognize them (or what they were saying to be honest).

“So they’ll be a little loopy for a while,” one of the dentists said to David, causing him to nod. Ollie had already taken a seat beside you and was holding your hand. The dentist then took David out of the room to talk about how to help clean the wounds and give him a list of foods that Y/n could eat while recovering. Ollie wanted to say something, anything to Y/n but they ended up talking before him.

“Whoever is your significant other is lucky because damn you’re hot,” Y/n chuckled slightly as they fell back against the pillows and smiled sleepily as they looked at him. “They’re like really lucky.”

“Well, you’ll be happy to know that you’re my significant other,” Ollie chuckled with them as he brought their hands up to kiss their knuckles.

“No way!” Y/n said as loud as the gauze in their mouth could allow as their eyes almost fell out of their head. “You’re telling me I bagged you?!”

“You bagged me,” Ollie chuckled in disbelief. He was upset at first that Y/n didn’t tell him sooner, but he couldn’t find it in himself to be mad at them, especially when they said something like that. “If I tell you a word, can you remember it for me?”

“Anything for you, handsome,” Y/n shamelessly flirted as they leaned in a little closer to prop their head against Ollie’s free hand that was resting by their head. 

“The word is ‘pole’,” Ollie said, and Y/n repeated it a couple of times before nodding that they understood it. “Okay, how are you feeling now?”

“I’m feeling tired. I wanna sleep. I wanna eat. I’m hungry. I want someone to tell me what place Ollie is in for the race tomorrow,” Y/n ranted before gasping toward the end, remembering the qualifying session they missed. In the haze, Y/n’s brain never connected that Ollie was sitting in front of them as they went on a rant. “Ollie Bearman is my favorite driver, and I wanna know where he placed. Do you know Ollie?”

“I know of him, yeah,” Ollie said as he bit back a laugh. There was no way he was witnessing this. “I think I know where he placed.”

“Where?” Y/n gasped as they tried to sit up in the bed, but the vitals machine started going off, causing a few personnel to walk in, but Ollie was already pushing them back.

“What was the word from earlier?”

“Pole?” Y/n said confused before it finally connected, “Wait, pole position?”

“Yup, he’s on pole for the feature race,” Ollie smiled at their enthusiasm. “Now, what’s my name?”

“What’s your name? CareBear?”

“Well, yes, but what’s my real name?” 

“Oliver,” Y/n dragged out before the fog cleared enough for them to make the connection. “Wait! Ollie, my CareBear! You’re Ollie!”

“I am,” Ollie chuckled as he leaned over to place a kiss on Y/n’s forehead while the dentists started removing wires and needles from Y/n, so they could leave. Ollie wrapped an arm around their shoulder, knowing Y/n didn’t like needles. He took to whispering reassurance in their ear until they were cleared to leave. Ollie then asked, “You still sleepy?”

Y/n didn’t respond as they were already asleep, so when all of the paperwork was signed, Ollie picked Y/n up to carry them to the car.  The entire ride to the hotel, Y/n was asleep against Ollie’s shoulder until David pulled into the parking spot. That’s when Y/n woke up, stretching their arms above their head.

“I still wanna sleep,” Y/n whined as they leaned back against Ollie. “My legs feel like jelly.”

“I can always carry you again,” Ollie commented already getting out of the car and moving around to help Y/n out. As soon as Y/n stepped out, Ollie’s arm was lifting up their legs to carry them up to their room. Thankfully, David was already leading the way and opening doors for them.

“You’re really working for that Boyfriend Of The Year award, aren't you?” Y/n teased as they plopped their head against Ollie’s shoulder.

“I didn’t know I was in the running,” Ollie joked back as he left a kiss on their nose.

“You’re always in the running,” Y/n pouted before going on another tangent, “Y’know, I’d love to kiss you, but I can’t really feel my lips so I don’t know how that would go.”

“I’ll give you a kiss when you don’t have bloody gauze in your mouth,” Ollie said as he walked up to the door. “Does that sound like a deal?”

“Add some ice cream or smoothies and you’ve got a deal.”

“You can’t drink from a straw, so no smoothies.”

“Buzzkill.”

“Not a buzzkill,” Ollie said simply as he set Y/n down on the bathroom counter, so he could change their gauze. “We’re not risking you getting dry socket.”

“Kissass.”

“How does that make me a kissass?” Ollie chuckled as he helped Y/n down from the counter and to the bed. Ollie fixed the pillows around them to make them comfortable before grabbing an icepack from the freezer. 

“You know the judge of the Boyfriend Of The Year award, and you’re kissing their ass,” Y/n chuckled as they leaned back into the pillows and took the icepacks from Ollie, immediately pressing them against their face. “Let me say, you’re winning.”

“I would hope so,” Ollie retorted, “I should be the only one in the running!”

~~~~~

© BAD268 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.

[space-mango-company]

Stranger | Chapter 5

Chapter Links: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5]

TW: Descriptions of Violence, Mentions of Cannibalism

Tags: Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x Atreides!Reader, Arranged Marriage, Eventual Smut, POV Second Person, No use of y/n, Original Characters, Canon What Canon

Word Count: 2.3k

A/N: Not proofread!! Holy moly. Here it is, folks. The scene that inspired this whole fic. I had fun writing this so I really hope you enjoy it. Once again, I appreciate everyone who likes, comments, and/or leaves kudos so much. I really started this fic for myself but good golly, that dopamine rush whenever I get a notif might be more addicting than spice. I'm glad to be part of the bald man brigade.

Also, I can't believe I'm only now questioning why I decided to write this in the second person? I guess maybe I thought this fic would be a lot shorter and not that deep, lol. At this point 'y/n' probably has enough personality to just be a straight-up OC. It's funnier because I don't even find second-person or y/n fics any more engaging either. I always detach myself by giving 'y/n' her own name and only seeing her as a character in the fic.

ANYWAY, sorry to ramble. Stay safe and have a good one, ya weirdos.

You step out into the dark cul-de-sac of the guest hall, illuminated only by the large suspensor lamp in the middle. Feyd-Rautha looks you up and down, seemingly entranced by how the dim light casts his shadow on your modest dress. Atreides green, he recognized.

"Trying to sneak into my rooms again?" you say arms crossed, leaning on your door. "I didn't appreciate the last time, by the way."

"It's my house," he says cooly, "and I did knock this time."

You stare at him indifferently.

"Quite the display from you yesterday morning, using The Voice on me." His voice low and raspy, "I should have you drawn and quartered."

You scoff in his face. "You almost choked me to death. Are you trying to start a war?"

He takes a step closer and his face is inches from yours, you can feel his breath on your cheek, "I didn't think I'd like you this much, little hawk."

"What do you want, Feyd-Rautha?" you had no patience for him right now.

"Ah," he steps back, a dark smile on his face, "I've been waiting to hear my name from your tongue." His hand reaches for your lips. "I've grown quite tired of 'na-Baron'."

You grab his wrist before he can touch you. "If you're only here to toy with me, I would rather be left alone to prepare for bed." You release his hand and turn to open your door.

Feyd-Rautha props an arm against the doorway to block you. "We're to be married in three days," he says, "and I just can't seem to bring myself to let go of my 'harpies', as you called them." He meets your gaze. "You said you'd kill them. Did you mean that?"

You look up at him with steely eyes. He towered over you but your heart felt no fear, "Yes."

His coy smile returns. "Good. Come to my training hall tomorrow," he says, walking away.

"What?" you call after him.

"Dress to fight," he says over his shoulder. "I want to see what you can do, Atreides."

You needed no help from Zora in putting on a loose shirt and long pants. The plain beige outfit certainly wasn't as elegant as the dresses you had been wearing so far. But it was comfortable and you could fight in it, which was all that mattered. Still, you look yourself in the mirror. The soft, airy fabrics draped over your figure well but perhaps you were not in the best shape as you once were. Your muscle mass is much less than your brother's and he wasn't particularly built himself. You admit you did wane off your training sessions with Gurney and Paul leading up to your departure from Caladan. Nevertheless, you were still a skilled warrior. Another secret you've been keeping from the Harkonnens.

You were 14 when you started learning the blade. Watching Paul, 2 years your senior, practice with the Atreides Warmaster lit a fire in you. You didn't hesitate to pester your father to let you train with them and of course, there was nothing he could deny his darling daughter. You were a fierce and determined student. Gurney Halleck was a man you genuinely believed to be one of the best fighters in the Imperium, along with Duncan Idaho. Gurney would train you and Paul on even days. On odd days, your mother would teach you the Weirding Way. These lessons, much like the rest of your mother's teachings, your father wanted to know nothing about. After becoming decently adept at Prana-Bindu and gaining almost complete physical control of your body, Lady Jessica insisted that you also be skilled in the Bene Gesserit style of combat.

You were far from mastery in either but the combination of both trainings made you a formidable fighter. Despite this, you could never seem to beat your brother in a sparring match. A fact that frustrated you to no end, though you appreciated that Paul never went easy on you. You'd always blame it on him having trained for longer than you have. But in truth, you knew there had just always been something special about him.

"Are you ready, my lady?" Zora's soft voice wakes you from your thoughts.

"Hm? Right. Yes, let's go." You quickly tie your hair out of the way and grab your father's dagger from atop your dresser.

There was no fanfare when you entered the hall. On one end, the na-Baron's concubines sat chained on the steps of the shallow recessed pit in their leathers, their glares piercing through you. Your eyes linger on them as Feyd-Rautha and his Warmaster greet you.

"I was starting to think my lady bride was bluffing," Feyd-Rautha says as you approach him. The older man beside him offers you a polite bow.

"Perhaps she wasn't so keen on your brutish games," you bite back. "Your lord uncle won't be joining us?"

"No," Feyd-Rautha crosses his arms, "but he'll be hearing about your victory. Or your demise."

"Right. Well, I assume you'll be releasing them from those chains," you nod towards his pets "Not sure why they're necessary."

"Oh, trust me, little hawk. They're necessary." Feyd-Rautha motions to a servant.

"Your blade and shield, my lady," they bow, presenting you with a knife and a small device you recognize as a Holtzman shield.

"I've brought my own," you unsheath your father's dagger. You contemplate taking the shield but remembering that the na-Baron forwent it during his gladiator fight, you decide to do so as well. "They've no weapons anyway, the shield seems pointless."

Feyd-Rautha shrugs, "If you insist."

You take a deep breath, "Let's get this over with."

You lightly stretch as you walk down the steps of the shallow pit to stand opposite the na-Baron's concubines. You had come into this on the pretense of righteousness. For Iassa, you told yourself. But you've known her a mere two days. A part of you wanted to show off. You were good and you knew it. You could probably kill anyone in this room, even Feyd-Rautha. You craved the respect of the people here: the Harkonnens, the people of Geidi Prime. You figured this was one way to get it.

Feyd-Rautha walks around the pit to one of his concubines and kneels to whisper something in her ear. You assume a fighting stance when he moves to release her from the chains. When you meet her eyes, they are filled with feral bloodlust.

Suddenly, you weren't so bold. The veil of courage you have maintained since you arrived, even when Feyd-Rautha had your neck in his grip, is torn apart when you face this woman. You could tell no part of her would hesitate to rip your throat out with her bare teeth. You were almost relieved they were unarmed, but you weren't sure if that would make them any less lethal.

Fear grew in your chest and you had less than a moment to recite the Litany in your head before the concubine lunged at you.

You crouch down in time and slash at her abdomen as she approaches you. You turn to face her on the other side of the pit and she wastes no time in attacking you again. She attempts to grab your armed hand but you take hold of her wrist first and move to pin it behind her back. Quickly, your blade drags across her throat and she falls to your feet.

The kill has not yet registered in your mind but your heart is racing. You can almost hear your blood coursing through your veins. You held your arms outstretched, your eyes focused ahead, ready for the next one.

Across the pit, Feyd-Rautha licks his lips, smiling as he releases his second concubine. This time, you walk toward her while she moves to attack you. You clock her head with the pommel of your dagger and knock her a few steps back. She reaches a hand to wipe the blood beginning to drip out of her nose. After examining it, she snarls and bares her sharp teeth at you. Your mind is blank now. She dodges your first slash then manages to land a blow to your jaw. You seethe from the pain. You spit out the mixture of blood and saliva filling your mouth. The anger at the hit drives you to rush at her. Seeing an opening, you duck down to her waist and stab her twice. As she falls to her knees, the look of determination doesn't leave her eyes until the very last moment.

When you turn around, Feyd-Rautha has already released the last concubine. The ruthless scream she lets out disorients you. She pounces and knocks you over. She straddles you and pins your arms to the ground, your blade sliding inches away. She screams again in your face at the death of her sisters. You wedge your right knee between you and her abdomen, the only thing keeping her teeth from reaching your throat. You grunt as you struggle to free your hands. In your periphery, you see Feyd-Rautha, wielding his own blade, take a step into the pit.

"GET BACK," you roar, and he is powerless to refuse.

You turn back to your opponent still on top of you and you butt her head with your own. She loosens her grip and you kick her off to hastily crawl to your weapon. When she reorients herself and attempts to grab you again, you hook a knee under her arm and flip the both of you over. With your weight on her chest and both your knees pinning her arms down, she thrashes underneath you, claws digging into your right ankle. You take your blade in both hands and her screaming is silenced when you sink your knife deep into her heart.

When you rise, the room is quiet. Your chest heaves. The stark white ceiling lights don't help the lightheadedness that begins to wash over you in the post-adrenaline rush. Feyd-Rautha says something from behind you but his speech is garbled as you reel from the thrill of what just transpired. You were electrified. You almost... wanted more.

Then, the realization of the revolting scene you are in settles upon you and you are knocked off your high. You look at the leather-clad bodies scattered around you, the grotesque way they lay on the floor, the red blood pooling around them made brighter by the sterile grayness of the room. You did this.

A hand on your shoulder snaps you out of it. In reflex, you turn and raise your blade at the offender.

Feyd-Rautha holds his hands up, "Whoa, easy, Atreides. Trying to kill me? Don't want to start a war, do you?"

You yield your weapon. Your eyes dodge his as you look to your feet and try to steady your breathing.

"Enjoy your first taste of blood?" Feyd-Rautha says, the look in his eyes indecipherable to you. He raises a hand and swipes his thumb on your cheek. It comes away covered in crimson.

You gasp and reach for your face with your own hand. You don't even know if it's your blood or theirs, or when it got on you. Your heart pounded, unable to decide whether you were repulsed or proud.

"Look at you," he says licking the red off his finger. You could not help but stare at him through the strands of your hair that had come undone in the fighting. "You're beautiful like this," his hand reaches for your face again.

"No," you say low and quiet when you swat his hand away, "you're sick." You didn't know if you meant him or yourself. You calmly turn to leave. No one stops you when you make your way up the shallow steps of the pit. As you pass Iassa—no, Zora—by the doorway, you tell her flatly, "Prepare a bath."

You had never taken a life before. Today, you took three. You were glad you didn't know their names. You decided you'd never find out.

After Zora pours a final pitcher of hot water into the bath, you tell her, "You may go. I'll dress myself later, thank you."

She bows and makes her way out of your rooms.

In your solitude, you bring your knees to your chest. You had been quick to wipe the blood off your cheek before you even reached your quarters. Now, you cup the water into your hands and rub it into your face, the slight sting of the heat comforting you.

He was a cruel man, your betrothed. This is what you've decided. Having you kill the concubines he claimed to want to keep so much. But wasn't it you who threatened to kill them? He started it, you argue with yourself, when he had Iassa killed. You felt like a child.

When you used to hear of Feyd-Rautha's exploits, you had to mask your disgust. And yet now, you had killed so easily in that pit as he had in the arena. What was this place doing to you?

When you left Caladan, Paul had never killed anyone either. You wonder if he ever does, would he feel the same exhilaration you did when you slit that first concubine's throat. No. Your brother was fierce but, like your father, he had a good heart. You beat him by three. You hoped it would stay that way.

You think about your future here, marrying Feyd-Rautha. Producing heir after heir under the Baron's watchful eye. You were a broodmare. Despite all your fancy training and education. Despite your little demonstration earlier. It was the bitter truth.

You missed home. You missed walking along the beach at night with your father. You missed your mother's gentle hands brushing your hair. You missed the banter and teasing with your brother. You missed Gurney, and Duncan, and the cold breeze on your balcony, and getting to roam free and going anywhere you pleased. When the tears come, you sink deep into the bath so they might fade away in the water.

Chapter Links: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5]

Taglist: @torchbearerkyle @austinswhitewolf @dreamlandcreations @emeraldsgirl @strawberryfieldsforevermore @bornslippys @vexis-world @aoi-targaryen @alexandrainlove @mamawiggers1980 @sstardussty @aboutthenabaron

[tenshinokorin]

TnK's Trigun Fic Listing

Ok now that I've got 15 fics out for Trigun (so far) and at least a couple of those are upwards of 20K and some of them are sequels and followups and ongoing, I thought maybe I should do a proper list of things, to make it easier for people who want to read in some kind of order. I'm terrible about talking up my own work but this is also for my own reference so that's fine, right? ^^; All fics are Vashwood-centric (I will get to Nai in a minute I have a backlog) and ratings vary from Gen to Explicit, though all are intended for an adult audience. This list is complete as of September '23, I will update it periodically as needed! 

NB: I'm lucky enough to have gotten fanart for some of these and sometime when my head is not full of mud I'll go in and add links to those where I can. (Or please drop a link in the replies if you are one of the wonderful artists in question!) 

THE BIG THREE STORYLINES: 

Someday Out of the Blue & I Believe in the Kingdom Come

Trigun '98 canon. Reincarnation fic. The first one is a story I started writing over 20 years ago and quit after a chapter because I was just too heartbroken (and did not know it, but was also too young). Picked it up and finished it this April (2023) after Stampede clobbered me and I fell off the "we don't talk about wolfwood" wagon. The second story is a direct sequel to tie up some loose ends from the first one, and also to indulge my need for a proper happy ending. (I think a lot of folks don't realize Someday has a sequel but it does!!) 

Black is the Color and Mysterious Ways

Trimax Canon. Resurrection/Fix-it/Angstmance with a much shorter, sillier, smuttier epilogue. Three years after the end of Trigun Maximum, Vash is having some trouble laying his ghosts to rest. (You may have seen this incredible artwork which has gotten around a bit and boosts the story better than any summary of mine possibly could.) Weird things happened when I was writing this, I don't mind telling you. Mysterious Ways was mostly an excuse to explore some of the more interesting concepts brought up by the first one, but saying anything more would be spoilery. 

Eyes of the Storm

(Mostly) Trimax canon. Cryptid Vash AU, slowburn romance, ongoing. When Nicholas D. Wolfwood gets roped into being the new caretaker for the now-abandoned orphanage where he spent his childhood, he soon finds out that his own hidden memories are not the only thing haunting him. (What the fuck is a Typhoon?) Wolfwood, Vash, Livio, Elendira, et al. This is the one currently in progress at six chapters out of ??. Pretty SFW so far BUT NOT FOR MUCH LONGER CAVEAT LECTOR. 

List continues with standalone and shorter fics below the cut!

Honeymoon

Generic Trimax/98 setting. Plant Heat, Wingfic, Tentacle Fic, What the fuck is Hay Fever. Wolfwood offers to help Vash out with a personal problem and gets a little more than he bargained for. 

Strange Powers

Generic Trimax/98 setting, comedy/smut/potato jokes/fisting with a loaded prosthetic. What if Vash and Wolfwood (accidentally) got really, really hella high? 

Hurricane

Trigun '98 Canon. 

Vash: Make money? As a priest?

WW: Well. *mysteriously* Not only that. 

Vash: (oh my gosh he's a prostitute)

Shortfic. Wolfwood tries to figure out how to offer his services to someone he doesn't really want to be a paying customer. Short and smutty while also demolishing Wolfwood's professional boundaries.

Skin Tight

Generic Trimax/98 setting. The Infamous Red Dress. PWP, Wolfwood needs to be in the Vash Sensory Deprivation Tank, Vash in high heels, the dress gave its life for this fic you should read it and honor its sacrifice. Look. This is just porn, guys. You want the porny fic? This is the porny fic. (just kidding most of them are porny fics but this one is especially so.) 

Secondhand Secrets

Generic Trimax/98 setting. Introspective/Vignette/Wolfwood POV. Vash's artificial arm always moves in his sleep, and Wolfwood wonders what he's looking for.

Personal Jesus

Badlands Rumble canon (post-film), Wolfwood has poor emotional coping strategies, hurt/comfort (Wolfwood provides both), first-time. That red hotel minifridge never stood a chance. 

A Fool From Any Direction

Trigun '98 Vash's weird horny schtick is a front, and self-respect doesn't save lives. Which is too bad because when Wolfwood finds out what Vash is planning next he's gonna kill him. 

Benediction

Trimax but could also be '98; Sometimes being a hero is not all it's cracked up to be. Or maybe Vash is the one cracking up. Hurt/Comfort, Wound Care & Bible Quotes, Noman's Land is a bitch of a planet. Shortfic, feels, non-explicit/no sex. 

A Bit of a Tight Spot

Generic Trimax/98 setting. Costume Porn, PWP, No corsets were harmed in the making of this fic. I feel like this one gets missed a lot which is MADDENING because you guys. WOLFWOOD'S DOUBLE Ds IN A CORSET. And like, in a gender euphoria way, not in a comedy drag kind of way (though comedy drag does make a small appearance). I don't know how the good minister tightlaced in cuban stockings while giving Vash a blowjob in front of a mirror in the attic of a whorehouse can get so often overlooked, maybe my title or summary is lacking, but it's one of the hottest things I've ever written and its engagement is just in the basement? When (emphatic baffled hand motions to Nicholas D. Wolfwood wearing a garter like a thigh-holster). Anyway. 

The Quick and the Bed

Trigun '98 Comedy, Romance, First Time. The single bed trope. Drunk Idiocy. Wolfwood's vows are in serious danger. (Wolfwood does not have vows.) Readers have let me know that they find this one amusing. Roommates of readers have sent me threats of bodily harm due to badly-stifled hysterical laughter at 3am. 

THAT'S ALL FOR NOW MORE STORIES WILL BE ADDED AS THEY OCCUR!

SMALL DISCLAIMER: I'm a full-time working writer and my fanfic is something I give away for free out of love. Please don't copy, alter, plagiarize, feed to AI in any form, fold, spindle, or mutilate. I'm not in the market for concrit, but if you like my stories please feel free to leave me a comment/kudo, download/print/fanbind for personal use, or let other readers know!

[toffeelemon]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

thank you @wilmonsfolklore for tagging me! 🫶🏼

How many works do you have on Ao3?

32 (that i didn’t orphan👀)

What's your total Ao3 word count?

366,979

What fandoms do you write for?

young royals baby! every now and then i’ll get into a fever dream for other media but yr is my constant

Top five fics by kudos

and they were roommates

royal pains

alex ayúdame

only fools rush in

worst kept secret in history

(i’m glad roommates is the highest because that’s what i’m most proud of. the rest were my entry to yr fics but i believe i have evolved since then!)

Do you respond to comments?

YES! please always leave me comments i love comments

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

lmao i famously don’t write angst. i wrote roommates right after a break up so that was a little rough but. i fixed it all with a timeskip so

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

they all do!!! i have never written a Happily Ever After though, i like the kind of beginning of a happy ending - like yr in canon. the 10 year time skip fic for my rwrb and yr crossover might be the closest to Endgame i’ve ever written?

Do you get hate on fics?

the princess wille AU is - sometimes divisive… rarely directly in my line of sight but i do see some Takes about it, to each their own i guess since it’s so personal to me

Do you write smut?

i surprise myself every time…

Craziest crossover:

i wrote a genderbent yr - first kill AU sksk that had to be my nichest work

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

yes and i revived my wattpad to call out some teenagers ripping off my yr fics. the most mindboggling thing was that they were responding to comments like they wrote it too

Have you ever had a fic translated?

YES! and they were roommates and worst kept secret in history is translated in brazilian portuguese !! every now and then i want to work on chinese translations for my own fics/ others but never got around to it

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

recently fell into writing bits and bobs for @prince-simon newest dead boy detectives fics! i love their writing sm i did try to weasel into their fics many a times, i’m so blessed to get to persuade my fave writer to give me what i want heheheh

All time favourite ship?

wilmon of course but i’d say that malec from shadowhunters set up the blueprint for me. i always enjoy reading firstprince because great fics are aplenty

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

started a s1 divergence fic when i was in a pretty dark spot in which wille’s mental health plummets and they have to navigate a healthy supportive friendship before wille could be good enough for himself and simon again. i think it could slap but writing it put me in such bad place so i doubt i will finish what i started

What are your writing strengths?

i didn’t notice until other people pointed it out but apparently i jump across POVs pretty seamlessly! i have always written stream of consciousness swapping POVs - i consume and love visual media way more than books so my head is pretty much in a very visual screenwriting/sceneblocking mode and every POV swap is like. a camera angle change to me

What are your writing weaknesses?

TENSES💀 writing in present tense is such a saving grace for me. logically i know i’m fluent in english but i have a lot of “english as second language student” trauma so i try to keep it simple and straightforward. also pingpong brain traits i don’t like having writing plans so sometimes i do lose the plot, struggle with continuity or forget about key themes and scenes and get mad about it

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

love-hate sksk my favourite scenario is if the translation is immediately available (but not disruptive somehow). i tend to forget by the time i reach the author’s note in the end. it’s more fun when it’s a language i have a basic grasp on so maybe i should just suck it up

(biggest pet peeve is if it’s another language romanised - it’s basically gibberish to native speakers i’m sorry😭)

First fandom you wrote in?

youtube rpf… on wattpad…

Favourite fic you've written?

there’s so many but. princess wille the manifestation of my own self you will always be famous x

tagging @prince-simon @aro-of-artemis @ungaroyals

[alangdorf]

Untagged ramble post about the the fic writing I’ve been doing + snippets (kind of a lot of them actually whoops) since idk if I’ll ever actually finish them let’s gooo (spoilers for said fics obvi)

Forgetting about Tsubakura’s hat when writing is my new forgetting about Vanitas’ Unversed when writing. Though in my defense I refuse to believe that their current normal outfit is what they used to wear to work because that is so many lab dress code violations including OPEN-TOED SHOES??!??!

Relatedly I had a funny moment of realization where I was like “wait I’m writing about throwing up black goop AGAIN??? What a coincidence”

Thus far I have caused one of my friends (not a len’en fan, only knows about it through my talking about it) to have TWO separate dreams about Len’en characters. I have since also had a dream about them but this friend had two before it even happened to me once (also I may have incorporated one or two aspects of said dreams into my stuff…)

I still write in my notes app with asterisks (discord markdown) for italics. I will never change and that is a promise

Btw in order the fics are: “Tsubakura makes terrible life decisions for two months straight and then Suzumi responds to them breaking up with her by faking her own death: the fic”

Followed by “The fact that there isn’t a unique ending for BPoHC Secret Team neutral route with Tsubakura as stage 6 boss has been plaguing me and I’m ‘boutta make it everyone else’s problem” (the actual current working title) (aka thinly veiled excuse for characters having sex that’s actually a thinly veiled excuse for Suzumi to explain why they did all that nonsense in the previous fic)

Then “Hamal Cine Bad End but I had to make a whole entire oc before deciding there would be anything there worth writing because if it was just Hamal and Tsubakura interacting it would be completely unreadable (featuring second person pov yet again!! So maybe it’s unreadable anyways idk)”

And finally “I couldn’t figure out how to finish that last fic satisfyingly so instead I started writing Tsubakura pov of before and after it but that means like half of it is just Hamal and Tsubakura which is what I was trying to avoid earlier whoops! The other half is logistics (actually that’s a lie the vast majority of it is logistics. What can I say I like logistics in my angst)”

Assuming Suzumi’s eye color just looks like brown to other people cause otherwise that would make the alters extremely obvious (I think zara also did this the other day ehe)

Arde should’ve been at the cluuuuub (Seriously though Arde has quickly skyrocketed into being one of my fave Len’en characters and also probably the person I feel the most bad for in at least my version of pre-canon. Like they all made bad decisions there but Arde had soooo much nonsense to deal with and extremely few viable alternatives)

I just now remembered the Japanese school year is different and I should look up what colleges typically do there

Unfortunately I cannot figure out how to google “what is the Japanese government’s procedure for reintegrating a formerly missing person into society when their kidnapping was a 37-year-old cold case (completely unrelated to the kidnapping they just escaped from) and also they’re largely made up of nanomachines or whatever now and have very advanced peripheral neuropathy and no living friends or relatives aside from this one rando who’s known them for about an hour (in the year 2050)”

Trying to make sense of Suzumi’s powers AAAAAAAAAA are the clones DIEGETIC??? Is Hooaka’s arm just gone FOREVER?? At the very least the disguise ability being Benny’s main ability would make some sense for how I’m writing them if. It’s even possible for them to turn it on and then have Arde front afterwards agh idk

Period-accurate communications tech also continues to be a completely self-inflicted thorn in my side. I’m assuming you could delete sent messages on whatever mobile messaging service Japanese young adults were using circa 2010 because I saw a post from 2017 saying you could do that on wechat and I can’t be bothered to do deeper research when it would significantly change my plot to find out otherwise

So you know how that one drawing of mine with Tsubakura and Tsurubami keeps just getting tagged as those two when it’s actually secretly suzutsuba (even moreso now that I’ve been developing Arde more lol)? That’s how I felt realizing that all my suzutsuba stuff is actually pointing to endgame yabutsuba (romantic or qpp idk idc) (also sorry ybtb fans I’m with you but I’m probably just gonna keep writing suzutsuba instead because my brain focuses on angst 100% of the time)

Semi-relatedly the aforementioned oc is named Koemi Oumura and happens to look a fair amount like Yabusame, which is presumably just a coincidence because Yabusame is the one character confirmed to not have any homeologues (extremely funny and scary fun fact), though I did come up with her name by like moving all the kanji in Yabu’s name a little to the left so lol who knows

While doing game dialogue research I ended up realizing that part of shrine team’s convo with Sanra is Tsubakura going “yeah clothes should be comfortable and unrestrictive!” and I was like “whoops… just gonna partially ignore that cause I’ve already been hcing the fact that you bind sometimes lol sorry”

Hamal gives herself biological immortality which is brought up only as a one-liner gag

Also I hope the way I write her dialogue isn’t like, too annoying. I cannot be bothered to copy paste unicode eighth notes wait a second I have a Japanese keyboard??! Oh well; still can’t be bothered so I’m just working with tildes and hearts. My friend tried to express which Len’en character showed up in its dream by saying “which suzumi is the ~ one. that one”

Ok time for assorted snippets (all mixed up just to keep ya guessing, though they also feel a little poetic in this arrangement. Mostly from the first fic since that’s the one I most want to post [and also the only one that’s T instead of M]) and then the sex stuff will be quarantined afterwards

Tsubakura pulls out their phone and sinks to the ground, breathing heavily (partially from the exertion). They look through their contacts. Yabusame is missing yet again. Haltingly, they punch in her number (they have it memorized, they triple-checked that they had it memorized just yesterday) and hit dial.

They start talking as soon as it picks up. “Yabu, I know I told you to let me handle things on my own for now, but I… I changed my mind; I need help, I-I don’t know what to do—”

The voice that interrupts them is not Yabusame’s, but they’d still recognize it anywhere. “Oh! Hello~! Expecting someone else, were we? Silly Tsuba~<3”

Tsubakura hangs up abruptly and just. Sits there. After a few minutes they check their phone to confirm, but it’s obvious that the number they have in their head is Suzumi’s. In fact, every number they have saved to their contacts is Suzumi’s. They don’t even bother with trying to remember their friends’ street addresses; they just hope she at least left them the route to the lab.

So. The message is abundantly clear. They’re alone in this. (And if the reason they’re late to work that day is because they curled up next to a dumpster and cried until they got scared she might come outside looking for them, well, that’s nobody’s business but their own.)

“The old Suzumi never quite worked up the courage to tell you all of this, but they really looked up to you, y’know? She was awestruck from the day you met. Renowned prodigy Tsubakura Enraku, this kid who was so smart, and educated, and accomplished, and cool, and attractive, and self-assured, and not even any older than she was? Who not only accepted her affections, but reciprocated them? Invited her to live with them? Ohh, she put you on a pedestal a mile high~! Gave them quite the inferiority complex, you did~ And then—“

“Don’t,” Tsubakura breathes, but she’s not done saying her piece yet.

“—The Accident happened. And what did you do? You blamed everything on her to save you own skin. While she was in the hospital, even! You betrayed her.”

“But that wasn’t—”

Hamee clamps a hand over their mouth and clucks her tongue disapprovingly. “It doesn’t matter what you thought you were doing. You’re smarter than that, Tsu~ba~ku~ra~. You know what it would’ve looked like. Felt like. And you certainly didn’t try to clear up any misconceptions with the higher-ups afterwards, did you~?”

Tsubakura looks mortified. It’s a good look on them.

Hamee chuckles and skims her hand down to the center of their chest. “And it broke Suzumi’s poor li’l heart~</3 Well, specifically Ardey’s, at that point. All her monumental faith in you just crumbled to dust. She’s wanted nothing more than good old-fashioned revenge on you ever since.”

…

Ardey’s silence in their head is palpable.

What? No pithy comments this time~?

Don’t talk to me right now.

If you say so~

Tsubakura’s heartbeat feels like a hummingbird caught beneath her fingertips, but they put on their best brave face. “And? What about you, Ha- whatever you said your name was. What exactly is your deal supposed to be?”

“Oh, me? Pretty little Hamee~? Well…” She gently cradles their head in her hands and leans in close, smiling serenely. Their already barely-stoic facade cracks just from that. “I never stopped seeing you as that beautiful, perfect genius that Suzumi idolized so! I still keep you up on that pedestal, Tsubakura-sama~<3 And all I want to do…” She whispers the last part in their ear like a catty schoolgirl telling a mean joke. “…is drag you down from it. Until you’re just as sad and broken as the rest of us~ Forever and ever <3”

And suddenly Hamal is there (still pretty hot, admittedly, but the effect is mitigated significantly by literally everything else about her), smiling without a care in the world, cupping Tsubakura’s face delicately in her hands like she isn’t currently out in a thunderstorm with a pistol tucked into her waistband, about to actually kill someone (specifically, YOU!!!) just to torment them. “Ohh, Tsubakura-sama… did you really think you could ever escape me~?”

When they tune back in to the present, Yabusame’s talking again. “—and a little while after you hung up, you sent me a photo of a handwritten note, and I didn’t really understand it, ‘cause the handwriting was weird and I think I didn’t know some of the kanji, but before I could ask you what that was all about, you deleted it, and none of my messages or calls have gone through since then!”

Tsubakura looks up from where they’ve been reflexively clutching at their head to see Yabusame standing over them all concerned, hands still out like she wants to touch them but can’t. (Right; she doesn’t know where they’re injured. They’re not 100% sure themself.) Mechanically, they reach down to grab their phone from their pocket and check it over. Nothing out of the ordinary except that there’s no trace of last night’s call, and Yabusame’s number is blocked and deleted from their contacts, which they quickly rectify. “Issue was on my end. Should go through now.”

“Okayyyyy…” Yabusame pouts, and then draws back a little and fidgets nervously. “Y’know, I checked for you here and at your favorite bar, and when you weren’t either of those places, I thought reeeeally hard about checking your apartment, but you said that if I ever popped into your apartment without an invitation again, you’d string me up by my ankles!” They briefly do an impression of Tsubakura lecturing them before getting even more subdued. “And, I figured, if you were at home, and Suzumi was there, ‘cause they’re always at home these days, that either Suzumi could fix the problem, or maybe Suzumi was the problem, and I was worried that me showing up maybe would’ve. Made it worse.” She tilts her head and looks at them imploringly, the platonic ideal of puppy-dog eyes. “Was that stupid of me?”

(There’s very little point in attempting anything else, even if they were able to; it all leads to the same outcome. She loves them when they struggle against her. She loves them when they love her back. She loves them when they give up entirely. She loves every single aspect of them. She loves the very concept of them. There’s nothing they could do that could possibly dissuade her. There’s no way to win anymore.)

Hoojiro’s brows knit together, but she doesn’t make any sort of remark about the strangeness of their behavior just yet, instead holding out their phone, which she must’ve retrieved from wherever it was they’d flung it last night. Or this morning, technically. Who cares. “Your phone. It sounds like Su-somebody’s calling?” She’s clearly trying to be delicate, but it’s on silent. She must’ve looked at the screen. She knows who it is.

Tsubakura deflates back into their chair, taking the phone only to drop it face-down on the table in front of them. (They don’t want to risk declining the call; that would just tell her that they’re awake and paying attention.) The jig is pretty much up anyway, so they bury their face in their arms and groan. They’re so tired. “Yeah, tell me something I don’t know…”

Hoojiro shuffles and hesitates before addressing the elephant in the room. “Doctor, I… you claimed it was just an accident that you fell asleep here the other night, and when I left yesterday you told me you’d make sure to go home, but you clearly didn’t, and now it looks to me like your girlfriend has been unsuccessfully trying to contact you, so I guess what I mean to say is… How long have you been here? Really.”

Tsubakura groans again in response.

“Doctor,” Hoojiro admonishes.

“Shitodo,” they reply in a similar tone.

She sighs. “Tsubakura…”

They peek out at her guiltily. “…..Four days. I think.”

With the short hair, loose-fitting hospital clothes, and useless blackened limbs, they’re hardly recognizable as Tsubakura Enraku, genius prodigy, groundbreaking scientist, honorary Senri priest. But that person was killed decades ago along with everyone else (and thousands more times afterward for good measure), and all they are now is a lingering ghost left trapped in their own decaying corpse. Or maybe, if you just focus on the wan face, the dark, sunken eyes, they look like the exact same clinically depressed and perpetually exhausted Tsubakura Enraku that they’ve always been, just currently lacking any work or leisure or alcohol in which to drown themself so they can forget about the absurd tragedy that is their life. Hard to say; they’re kinda mixing their metaphors here.

“The angry one is called Ardey. Most of our ~trysts~ in the past have actually been with her fronting, but she decided it would be more practical to just straight-up kill you after you stopped wanting to have anything to do with us. Soooo she’s trying to pretend like she isn’t watching right now, teehee <3”

HEY.

“She says hi~!”

I DO NOT. SHUT UP.

Ok, this is all very. Beside the point. The point being that Tsubakura woke up to their girlfriend smothering them with a pillow. They attempt to calm down and take a deep breath, neither of which is made easier by Suzumi’s weight on their stomach. “So… uhh… did you just try to kill me?”

Suzumi laughs airily, but with an ever-so-slightly nervous edge. “Ohh, ‘kill’ is such a strong word…” She trails a finger down the underside of their jaw. “Really, what’s a little bit of suffocation between friends~?” She continues down their throat and traces along their collarbones. “If it helps, it was just a… mood swing thing. Shouldn’t happen again. I like making you squirm a liiittle too much to actually want to get rid of you~” She hooks the finger on the collar of their shirt and tugs.

“You’re trying to distract me now, aren’t you.” It’s hardly a question.

“Is it working?” Suzumi deadpans.

They should probably be more concerned, and will definitely start sleeping on the couch after this, but for now, Tsubakura swallows and makes a decision that is… not one of their smarter ones, to be honest. Whatever. Blame the oxygen deprivation, if you must.

“Well. You could be trying harder.”

“I always took you for granted, because I’m a black hole of a human being that just takes and takes and takes until there’s nothing left. I don’t know if there’s even any of the real you left in there, Suzumi. So:”

Tsubakura sinks down to one knee and reaches up a hand, their dark eyes as unreadable as ever. Hamee feels their heart skip a beat at the sight, but for all the wrong reasons. She won’t lie and claim that she hasn’t fantasized about setting up a scenario like this someday, buying a white dress and a real tux and rubbing in her victory over them with the “‘til death do us part”s and all that, but not like this. Not on their terms; not with them real and in the flesh and kneeling right here in front of her, acting out something that could’ve happened years ago if they’d been either a whole lot better for each other or just a little more stupid, but asking for a knife to the jugular rather than an “I do”. Everything about this is wrong.

“I’m giving myself to you,” Tsubakura says. “Will you take me?”

The police haven’t even bothered to get back to them about pressing charges (a laughable attempt, they know, but they had to try something) by the time Tsubakura’s old apartment goes up in flames, and the obituary of Suzumi Kuzu gets printed in the papers, accompanied by the awkward university ID photo of somebody they maybe loved, once. Just making it official that that person is long gone, they suppose.

(But they don’t believe she’s dead for even a second.)

Sex stuff is down here

They just keep having sex. It just keeps happening. I’m aroace-spec and actively religious; how did I get here? Where am I?? Hello????

The number of sex scenes I am writing around is absolutely crazy given that like. I literally can’t even bring myself to use the word “butt”. Tsubakura is mostly naked about half the time. I am matrix dodging specifics out here (to be clear all intercourse is either before/after the parts that I’m actually writing or it’s vaguely skipped over. Even if I wasn’t holding myself to particular language standards I’m always in it more for the emotional part of it and don’t care for the explicit sex stuff so everything I write should be M at most)

I am extremely aware that Hamal Cine Bad End is a lot (and definitely an extreme canon divergence; like perfect storm of things going wrong, Arde and Benet would have to be out of the picture, Hamal would need to get like 10000% less impulsive) and I’m very nervous about sharing any of it at all!! Uhhhhh what else to say about it… I’m trying not to be too gratuitous? The one actual beat-by-beat scene I have any plans for atm is much more focused on the psychological/torture aspects once it flips into gear (not particularly gory either)? Hopefully I’m handling it well? Idk I just hope if I do end up posting it that my writing speaks for itself. Stands on its own. Or whatever like you know what I mean

Ok moving on so you remember that first fic I was writing a few months ago and then abandoned? That fic was funny cause the whole idea I was going off of was using marriage as a metaphor for getting murdered (second to last snippet is a surprise cameo from that heehee; I couldn’t figure out how to write into it in a way that would make sense though) and if I ever published that one I would definitely have needed to put out a disclaimer that’s like “Yes I am happily married, yes I am aroace, yes I am only interested in super toxic shipping; I contain multitudes” (also no ace discourse please; despite the fact I could pass for allo in some ways I still choose to identify as aroace because my aro/asexuality affects a lot of areas of my life even if it’s not that visible to others)

I know I mentioned a while ago that I was projecting somewhat onto Suzumi but just to be clear I’m definitely also projecting onto Tsubakura. Sorry for giving them all my sexual preferences (and one very specific fairly minor parental trauma); it will happen again (that’s me on the left; I haven’t changed my pfp to reflect my current sona) (don’t mind the koala)

[marshymallo]

i hear the secrets that you keep…

when you’re talking in your sleep

pairing: mike schmidt x gn! reader

synopsis: you’re abby’s latest babysitter, but there’s just one problem… her older brother is really hot and you may just have a crush on him. good thing he has no idea though, right?

tags: fluff, second person pov, two idiots in love (neither one knows until now), takes place after the fnaf movie, slight use of the song/lyrics bc it's more fun that way

word count: 1.7k (wow-)

a/n: welcome to 'i came up with a cute idea for a fic and then was encouraged by several people to make it so i did' otherwise known as my first time writing fanfiction. constructive criticism is welcome and, in fact, highly encouraged! i’m not a great writer and this was just for fun, but i’m always willing to improve. leave a like, comment, and reblog if you enjoy this!

icons by @dianauniverse

9:31 pm

it's been a few months since everything happened at the pizzeria. mike had been able to find some more jobs and even more ways to get fired from them. this most recent job had the best pay by far, but the hours were still awful. ever since he worked at freddy's, he just couldn't seem to find another job that wasn't working the graveyard shift. as mike tries to come his unruly hair, a useless endeavor, there came a quiet knock at the door. he opens it and there's you, abby's newest (and longest) babysitter and quite literally the most attractive person he thinks he's ever seen.

mike had first seen you at the grocery store, wait, no- the ice cream shop? god, he really needs to sleep more… it was both. when he worked as security in the mall, you were working at the ice cream shop in the food court. and, somehow, you always had his usual order ready for him before he had even come up to the counter. you were grocery shopping when he (literally) bumped into you. abby insisted that she could push the shopping cart just before she ran it into your side.

in that moment, mike had decided two definitive things. one: abby was never allowed to push the cart again until she was was taller than it and two: you looked really fucking cute while you were cursing under your breath so his little sister wouldn't hear such vulgar language. mike kept apologizing profusely for abby when even when you kept insisting that you were completely fine. the two of you lost track of time just talking and catching up with one another that neither of you had even noticed abby wandered off and collected the rest of the groceries by herself until she returned with a cart overflowing with snacks and sweets.

before abby dragged her brother to the register, you had written your phone number on the back of your grocery list and handed it to him saying, "it was really nice catching up with you. don't be a stranger, alright?" you hadn't anticipated him to call you that night, jumping at the sudden sound of your landline's obnoxiously loud ringing in your house.

"hey, it's mike. look, can i ask you a favor? abby's babysitter just cancelled on me last minute…" you arrived at the schmidt household not even twenty minutes later, holding some tupperware containers with food and dessert which had abby wrapped around your finger in an instant.

that fateful saturday was almost a month ago, now. mike still hadn't been able to pay you, but you kept shrugging him off. you always wore a soft smile on your face when you would tell him "i'm not doing this for the money, mike. i'm doing it because you're my friend." which is exactly what led you to where you were now: awkwardly admiring mike as you stood at his front door while preparing to watch abby for the night.

"you should really just expect me to be early by now, y'know? the day i show up late to look after my favorite schmidt is the day hell freezes over."

"your favorite schmidt? ouch… who knows? maybe one day you'll surprise us all and be just one minute late," he jokes.

"uh huh, sure…" you trail off, staring at mike as he continues to get himself ready. his curly hair fighting against him and his comb, but it looks so soft and so good on him. and he hasn't had time to trim his facial hair in a bit, but it really works for him. has being perpetually tired with eyebags ever looked so good on a man? you're so caught up in admiring him that when he turns to look at you, you avert your gaze and pretend to be fascinated by whatever was on the television.

"are my clothes too wrinkled?" he asks, one eyebrow ever-so-slightly raised as he glances at you. if looking good was a crime, mike would be given the death sentence…

"i don't think so.. then again, you're asking the person wearing an old hoodie and sweatpants…" you mention. he breathes out a laugh. "i'll take it."

mike reaches past you to grab his backpack. you can smell a hint of the cologne he put on from how close he is and god be damned if it doesn't make him even more attractive. "i'll see you when i get back," he says softly.

you let out a small "see you!" only to receive a tight-lipped smile as he gently closes the door behind him. you groan as you hand your head in your hands. you and your hopeless crush on the brother of the girl you were babysitting…

6:52 am

mike is exhausted as he pulls into the driveway with a yawn. he sluggishly walks to and leans against the front door. he can feel the sleep in his eyes and the tiredness of late hours fogging his brain as he misses the lock with his key a few times. when he opens the door, it swings open and slams against the wall from the force of his body resting upon it. shit.

you're curled up on the couch and asleep, moving slightly underneath the small throw blanket. he sets his stuff down gentler than when he opened the door so as not to wake you while tip-toeing his way down the hall to check on abby. she's asleep in her bed, tucked in and surrounded by her stuffed animals. there's a book on the nightstand indicating that the ten-year-old bargained that she would only go to sleep if you read to her. this wasn't true, of course, but abby loved to hear your tired voice read to her.

mike slowly crept his way back into the living room, just noticing the noise and soft glow of the tv as an infomercial murmurs in the background. he grabs the remotes and turns it off, the faint buzzing ceasing. you shift around again as soon as he does so, but you never wake. mike pauses his movements, awkwardly hovering over you in case you do wake up, eventually deciding you're still asleep before he quietly shuffles back to where he dropped his things. he felt bad waking you, especially since he recently found out that you, too, were struggling with sleeping at night.

he goes into the kitchen to grab a glass of water, only to see that you've cleaned the room and washed the dishes for him again. after the first time he noticed it, he insisted that you didn't need to do that for him. that he was perfectly capable of doing it himself. your response every time? "you always come back exhausted, mike. i can clean a few dishes and tidy up one room for you." he's thankful for it, for you, honestly. you just… wanted to do nice things for him. and for abby. god knows that girl loved you to death. so much so that she had even started including you in her endless colorful drawings.

mike checks the time on the microwave. 6:58 am. he'd let you sleep until 7:30. or maybe 8? he'll wake you up when abby wakes up, he decides. mike walks past you on the couch again when he hears you mumbling to yourself. at first, he thinks he's accidentally woken you up. but then, mike hears you babbling complete gibberish. he huffs out a laugh before he hears something actually intelligible.

"w…n…love you, mike…" he freezes. before he can question what just happened, you go completely silent, moving underneath the blanket once more. did he hear that right? you…love him?

all of a sudden, an alarm goes off. your alarm clock, indicating that it's already 7 am. the alarm clock you brought from home just so you could wake up early to help abby get ready for her day, how could he forget? you stir awake only to see mike frozen and staring at you from above, jaw slack and a dumbstruck look on his face. a few moments pass before he comes back to reality.

"good morning…" you mutter with a yawn. similar to how abby loved hearing your soothing voice lull her to sleep, mike loved hearing your deep and raspy morning voice as you were first waking up.

"hey… sleep good?" mike's thoughts are racing at this point, only to be disrupted by you stretching your arms above your head and asking, "yeah. did you just get back?"

"um, yeah…" he stumbles away from the couch before adding, "y'know… you were talking in your sleep…"

"did i? was it something embarrassing?" you joke, but the tense silence is the only answer you need. "well shit, what did i say?" you inquire.

"it's… nothing really. just something stupid. don't worry about it-"

"i'm going to worry about it until you tell me, mike. what did i say?" you cut him off. and it's true, you won't stop thinking about what you might've said until mike tells you. it's a fact that both of you were well aware of.

"just, um, you told me that you love me…?" mike is met with absolute silence. when he gathers up the courage to glance at you, all he can see is your wide-eyed stare in disbelief.

"is this some sort of joke?? because it's not very funny, mike-" you defend.

"what?- no, it's not a joke-" he startles at your response. "i just- …do you? …love me?"

your head hangs in your hands from embarrassment. he can just barely make out a muffled 'mhmm' and head nod as you refuse to look at him. the gentle warmth of mike's hand is placed on your shoulder as he uses his other hand to lift your chin to gaze up at him.

you stare into his eyes. has mike always looked at you with such a comforting and alluring gaze? you can feel his warm breath against your skin and you're sure that here, in this moment, you've never been closer nor wanted to be closer to mike than right now. you lean in, just a little more and…

"ARE YOU TWO FINALLY DATING?!"

aaaaaaaaaand abby's awake…

final author's note: if you're reading this, thank you so much! this is my first time actually writing fanfiction. it was fun, but i'm not entirely sure i'll ever do it again because writing really isn't my strong suit- if you wanted to write a mike schmidt x reader using this prompt idea, tag me!! i'd love to read it! i hope you enjoyed :))

[itcameuponamidnightqueer]

we were wild and fluorescent (come home to my heart)

pairing: carol/maria notes: did we really think i could stay away from these two summary: obligatory ‘carol recovers from an injury at home’ fic.

//

The dreams are your favorite part, if you can really have one. Fights are fun sometimes (winning is better), but you really have to search for a bright side when you get knocked out. It seems you always find one in your dreams because Maria is always there.

She is the constant in your life even though you forgot about her for six years. You wish you could say that a part of her was there, even then, but you know she wasn’t. Memories of Maria only started to come back when you watched her duck under the wing of her plane, eyes guarded and mouth open. You wish she would have smiled while you were outside instead of at the kitchen table. Maria is brighter than anyone you’ve met—you’re the one who glows but she was meant to be blinding. Nothing holds the sunlight quite as well as her lips.

The swarm of Chitauri closing in on you is stronger than you are fast; you know this. Still, you punch and kick and blast until they ground you, until you can’t see the sky through their bodies. Maybe Talos heard you. Maybe he’s close enough with the ship, about to land and save you. Or maybe today is the day you finally learn how much of a beating your body can take.

You close your eyes and wait.

read more @ ao3

[hoe-doroki]

ana’s bnha x reader masterlist

first updated 11.17.20 last updated 07.13.21 desktop version found here bkdk masterlist: desktop | mobile

fics [38] drabbles [13]

Thanks for dropping by! I want to note that I no longer write x reader and instead am writing bakudeku shipfic. So! By all means, read, like, comment on my fics here! But I can't recommend that you follow me unless you like bakudeku. Hope you enjoy your time here regardless! <3

legend:

character x character

Title w/ link | [rating] | word count | genre

Synopsis

ratings are bracketed: e.g. [g], [t], [m], [e]

[g] - appropriate for general audiences [t] - appropriate for audiences 13+ [m] - contains non-graphic adult themes [e] - explicit, 18+ readers only

🌸 = personal faves

characters x reader: no ship (1), aizawa (2), bakugou (12), endeavor (1), iida (2), kaminari (1), kirishima (4), midoriya (7), shinsou (2), todoroki (19)

Everything is in alphabetical order <3

no ship

2020 Election Night Comfort | [g] | 0.6k | hurt/comfort

The results are in and your class is all with you as you process the results

aizawa x reader

Stress Relief | [e] | 3k | smut

There's a new regulation that forces you to take an extra class before you can graduate college. When you learn that Eraserhead is teaching the class, you’re a little more interested.

2020 Election Night Comfort | [g] | 0.6k | hurt/comfort 

Aizawa reminds that you were prepared for this and, together, you can handle it.

bakugou x reader

Can’t Find My Breath | [e] | 4.2k | smut 🌸

At the beginning of the day, Ground Zero was just another hero you wrote articles about. Now it’s nighttime and you’ve just left a bar together. Companion to The Rest with No Sound

Christmas Cold | [g] | 1k | fluff

You and Katsuki manage to make it to your parents' house for the holidays, but you've come down with a little cold.

Doing Something Right | [e] | 1.8k | smut

You’re pregnant and happily enjoying domestic bliss when Katsuki comes in, unable to resist you.

Frustration | [e] | 3.1k | smut

request. After a long day of work, Katsuki comes home frustrated and you, suffering from a different kind of frustration yourself, know exactly what will help you both.

Gorgeous | [e] | 1.5k | smut, hurt/comfort

ask. When you have a negative response to Katsuki touching you in a moment of insecurity, he intends to do whatever he can to alleviate your fears.

version 1: petite reader

version 2: curvy reader

Magic | [e] | 2.2k | smut

request. Katsuki comes home early and catches you...taking care of yourself.

Miniskirts | [e] | 0.8k | smut 🌸

After a long day, Katsuki takes a shower and his thoughts turn to you.

On the Job | [e] | 4.5k | smut 🌸

Super human society has a secret. Aphrodisiac quirks aren’t just of porn and fantasy--they’re common and too often fall into the wrong hands. When heroes get hit, someone has to be able to activate the quirk’s release condition. If they’re single, who might that someone be?

You.

The Rest with No Sound | [t] | 8.5k | slow burn, fluff 🌸

Bakugou thinks that people who wake up not remembering where they are are idiots. This is confirmed when it happens to him, head aching from a night of drinking. Idiot. But when he looks over, and sees you there, he realizes he doesn’t remember anything. So he has to gather the scattered pieces from the day before to figure out exactly how he ended up with you. Companion to Can’t Find My Breath

Stay | [g] | 2.2k | hurt/comfort 🌸

ask. The last thing you want to do on a rough day is worry Bakugou with your problems. So you try to hide it. You should have known better.

Steamy | [e] | 2.7k | smut

request. You're a pro hero, rising in the ranks and, happy though he is for you, Katsuki's old jealousy begins to roil. After you've been paraded around all evening as one of Japan's finest, Katsuki finds himself feeling more than a little possessive, and can't help himself from taking you as his.

Steel and Lace | [e] | 3.8k | smut

The only one who manages to get Bakugou’s birthday right is you.

endeavor x reader

When the Smoke Clears | [e] | 17.4k | slow burn, smut

Soulmate AU. After his battle with Hawks against Hood, Endeavor wakes up in the hospital to find that a young doctor saved his life, their quirk being able to counteract the negative effects of his own. His first thought is that he has to talk to you–you might be able to fix the drawbacks of his quirk. His second thought is oh no, not again.

iida x reader

Broken Glass | [g] | 1.8k | fluff, mild comfort

request. In a quirk-related accident you find yourself surrounded by shattered glass. Worst of all, most of that glass is from every single pair of your boyfriend’s glasses.

Flotsam, Jetsam, Lagan, and Derelict | [g] | 1.5k | hurt/comfort

ask. Trying to hide a panic attack from your boyfriend isn’t easy when he’s right next to you. But you’re determined to suffer alone.

kaminari x reader

2020 Election Night Comfort | [g] | 0.4k | hurt/comfort

You share your unsteady hope with Kaminari.

kirishima x reader

Silhouette | [e] | 1.8k | smut, hurt/comfort

ask.  Before a gala, you’re stuck in the mirror, caught on all your old body insecurities. Kiri comes in and loves you regardless.

version 1: petite reader

version 2: curvy reader

We’ll See | [g] | 6.3k | gen, light romance 🌸

demisexual!Reader. After a fateful meeting, you and Kirishima keep running into each other. And although he’s so nice, you fear the fact that he might be interested in you. Even though all you want is, for once, to let yourself be happy and maybe fall in love, you can’t seem to be able to.

What We Look For | [t] | 15.5 | slow burn

Last time, you and Kirishima became friends—nothing more, nothing less. The idea of being something more sounds nice. But you can’t. You just can’t. So you won’t. Whatever happens will be on your own terms. Sequel to We'll See

2020 Election Night Comfort | [g] | 0.4k | hurt/comfort

Kirishima freaks out while you experience a numb calm. You meet in the middle.

midoriya x reader

Bad Days | [g] | 1.4k | hurt/comfort

Izuku helps you get out of bed.

Sunlight | [e] | 2.1k | smut 🌸

request. An early afternoon in bed with your husband, Izuku.

Surprised, Just Once | [e] | 5k | smut

request. You were planning on just another predictable night out with the girls. What you got was much, much more.

2020 Election Night Comfort | [g] | 0.3k | hurt/comfort

Izuku holds you close while you watch the results.

Multiple unrelated oneshots with Deku with an s/o with an eating disorder | ask

Gratitude | [t] | 1.4k | hurt/comfort

After having been with Izuku a while, you’re suffering a relapse and he helps you through with some gratitude practices on date night.

Picnic | [t] | 1.8k | hurt/comfort

Izuku surprises you with a picnic on your second date, much to your horror.

A Start | [t] | 1.2k | hurt/comfort 🌸

You ask Izuku for help when you realize you need it.

Trust Yourself | [t] | 2.3k | hurt/comfort

Shortly after moving in together, Izuku learns of your struggles and tries his best to comfort and encourage you.

shinsou x reader

Passing the Night Stars | [g] | 3.2k | hurt/comfort

The party was neon and you needed darkness.

2020 Election Night Comfort | [g] | 0.4k | hurt/comfort

Shinsou helps you prioritize yourself.

todoroki x reader

All Dressed Up | [e] | 4.6k | smut 🌸

quarantine fic. It’s been months since you’ve dressed up, felt pretty, and felt seen by anyone. Your husband’s birthday is a perfect excuse to get all dressed up. And then take it right off.

All the Wasted Time | [e] | 3.2k | smut, fluff

Three months ago, you’d been ripped from Shouto’s side with something less than a love confession, something more than a show of feelings. Now that you’re back, you’re eager to make up for lost time. Siberia sequel, First Snow prequel

Bad Days | [g] | 0.9k | hurt/comfort 🌸

Shouto comforts you when your demons arrive unexpectedly.

First Snow | [g] | 2.2k | fluff

A year after the events in Siberia, you and Shouto are happily together, and it’s the first snow of the year. Siberia and All the Wasted Time sequel

On the Job | [e] | 3.4k | smut 🌸

Super human society has a secret. Aphrodisiac quirks aren’t just of porn and fantasy--they’re common and too often fall into the wrong hands. When heroes get hit, someone has to be able to activate the quirk’s release condition. If they’re single, who might that someone be?

You. Sequel to On the Job (Bakugou); can be read alone

Siberia | [e] | 13.8k | pining/angst, smut, fluff 🌸

On the field, you and Todoroki are rising stars amongst hero pairings. Off the field…you’re kind of in love with him. After a successful capture, you’re boss brings you in to let you know you’re being sent on assignment in foreign country…alone. Before you leave, you have to act. You’re not partners anymore, after all. And with a little liquid courage you do. Then, the next morning, you still have to leave. All the Wasted Time and First Snow prequel.

Worth it | [t] | 0.3k | gen

The morning after with your boyfriend, Shouto.

2021 Election Night Comfort | [g] | 0.5k | hurt/comfort

The stress of election day comes back swiftly during the Georgia runoff and Todoroki’s quick to notice.

all works below are within the world of the a spare heart series:

A series about a fem, American reader who had to transfer to U.A. partway through second year. You’re there to become a hero, that much is obvious, but why else did you come? And, more importantly, what—or who—makes you stay?

timeline

may, year two:

- reader finishes junior year of American high school early

- reader transfers to u.a. from the united states

The Meeting | [g] | 0.1k | gen

Reader meets Tokoyami for the first time. Sequel to first impressions from my wip list

Hollow Victory | [g] | 9.6k | gen, action

chapter 1 | chapter 2

You transferred to U.A. from America two weeks ago. No one has found out your quirk yet. Today, they’re going be meeting it head on and you have the advantage: surprise.

june, year two:

Illiterate | [g] | 2.1k | fluff, comfort

Being unable to read Japanese makes you feel so stupid. And who comes into the common room after midnight just as you’re about to cry? The boy who hasn’t spoken to you in three weeks.

sequels

The Offering | [g] | 0.4k | fluff, gen.

The Mission (Shouto POV) | [g] | 0.3k | fluff, gen., silly

september, year two:

Impetus | [g] | 2.1k | friendship

Ever since Shinsou found out what your quirk was, the two of you have been each other’s best friends and confidantes. But when he turns a casual training session into a tease over your supposed crush on someone in your class, that trust might just break.

january, year two:

This Clock Never Seemed So Alive | [g] | 1.2k | fluff, comfort

You and your boyfriend, Shouto, always walk to class together, but today you haven’t yet left your dorm. When he checks on you, he finds you awake, but curled on your side, suffering from period cramps.

sequels

The Questions (drabble) | [g] | 0.1k | gen.

The Sweetness (double drabble) | [g] | 0.2k | fluff, comfort

february, year three:

Between Fear and Guilt | [t] | 2.5k | light angst, comfort

You and Shouto only started being intimate a couple months back, but you’re already experiencing a dry spell. Today you’re going to figure out what’s up with your boyfriend once and for all.

fifteen years after graduation

Something Perfect | [e] | 3.7k | smut, fluff

After years of questioning if Shouto would ever want children, he’s finally decided that he really does. Overjoyed, the two of you decide to get started.

[writing-in-april]

My Date with the President’s Daughter

Spencer Reid x Female Reader (Spencer POV)

Summary: Spencer has a date with the President’s daughter, who he’s been dating for a while in partial secret. He hasn’t seen her in person for a while so he’s had to settle for another form of communication.

A/N: Ok just to get this out of the way— this is not a politically charged fic, I don’t express my own political beliefs in this fic nor do I express my opinion on the beliefs of others. The president in this fic is entirely made up and I just thought it would be cool to release it on Inauguration Day like the nerd I am. I do not want a political debate in the comments, this blog is not meant for that. This fic is for fun and to make people a little happier in these trying times. Please respect my wishes. This was a really fun way to write a twist on Spencer dating someone famous and- I wonder if anyone can spot the West Wing reference I used 🤔Thanks to @spencers-dria again for always helping me out with my fics 🥰This is also apart of my unlinked fic series called Spencer Reid & Letters! Requests are open and thank you for reading!

Warning: Vague political talk, References to keeping their relationship secret earlier, Avoiding the paparazzi- that should be it.

Main Masterlist Spencer Reid & Letters Word count: 1.6k

She didn’t have to put her short little letter to me on the back of a postcard, but she always did it this way. I remember when she first told me why she did it. We were sitting cuddled up on my couch at the early start of our relationship. I had asked her why she always insisted she send her letters on the back of a tiny card, she would’ve had so much more room if she got out a piece of paper.

She said she got into the habit of sending them to her father whenever he was away on business. Her handwriting had been horrible as a child according to her and her father had suggested she try to fit all of her thoughts onto a postcard. So, now she sent all of her letters neatly handwritten with the smallest of letters, so small you could almost barely read them, on the back of a postcard.

The postcard I had gotten late today, delivered by one of the last people on duty this late at night, was a picturesque view of the White House. The grass bright green and the outside covered in pure crisp white, a statuesque image of American democracy. Now, she didn’t send this to me because she wanted to express her political views and patriotism in a postcard, it just so happened to be where her father lived.

The fact that she was the President’s daughter used to intimidate me a lot when I first met her. I hadn’t immediately connected the dots in my head that she was the first daughter when we first met, though I could tell I had seen her somewhere before. Though, my first assumption was that maybe she had been a regular at my favorite coffee shop, not the daughter to the President of the United States. Literally my biggest boss.

First time I met him was also my first time in the east wing; she had some help from her secret service detail to sneak me in through the back. I only ever nervously stutter when I’m in intimidating or stressful situations and I’m pretty sure I barely got a sentence out the first ten minutes after I had met him. Luckily, he did seem to like me, though I’m not really sure why. Y/N told me once it was because he found my intelligence extraordinary and my constant willingness to share facts endearing. I always blush when I remember that, she was always so sweet to me and the fact that her family loved me as well caused my heart to swell exponentially. I stared at the captured view for a few seconds longer before the dots had fully connected in my head, I may have an eidetic memory, but sometimes it took me a minute to get her subtle hints. She didn’t actually live at the White House, she had her own house in D.C. But, this postcard meant one thing. She’s home.

Each postcard she sent me had a picture of wherever she was while she was traveling the world, it was a small gesture that made me feel closer to her, I always tried to imagine I was there with her at every location she sent. She had been out of the country for at least a month on business and even before that we hadn’t seen each other for a while, I had been stuck on a long case that kept me away from her for half a month.

A month and a half, that’s how long it's been since I’ve had her in my arms. I turned over the card expecting to see it filled with more words than most people would think could fit on the back of a postcard to let me know when I could see her, but this was not the case. Instead, the back of the card contained less words than normal. Only the words- meet me at 10pm at our usual spot.

My body moved faster than my brain, getting up to pack up all my things to rush to our usual spot. My watch sat over my cardigan sleeve on my wrist and it blinked up at me letting me know I only had 30 minutes till I had to get to the other side of town.I still had some paperwork left, but enough that I could push it off till the next day. Once I had gotten all my stuff together I scurried over to leave through the glass doors.

“Are you heading home, Spence?” A voice from inside the bullpen called out startling me out of my thoughts, I had thought everyone had left for the night. I turned around to look at the owner of the voice, JJ, who had come back from the break room to finish her large stack of paperwork that still remained.

“Actually no- I have a date.” A small shy smile made its way onto my face, I still felt very shy when I talked about my relationship with the team. When I had first told them after around 8 months into our relationship, they had thought I was pulling their legs. Once they did realize that I was in fact, not bullshitting them as Morgan had suspected, the questions had immediately come down on me. The ogling at my relationship never really ceased in the months after it had come out to the team, and the rest of the world. We mostly still tried to keep it under wraps, but the fact that the press now knew about me after some photos got leaked from a date only made the team ogle even more.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to who you go on dates with, it’s like something out of a movie.” JJ joked, then yawning again and leaning her face into her palms. “Well- I still have a lot of paperwork to do, you go enjoy your night, Spencer. I know you haven’t seen her in a while.”

My mind had already begun to shift away from JJ as soon as she brought her up, I was practically vibrating in anticipation, I couldn’t wait to see her.

—-

The rare book store on the east side of Quantico had been my favorite for years, ever since I had moved out here from Vegas actually. So much so that the owners, an older couple named Margaret and Dan, both knew me by name and knew almost exactly what books I wanted every time. The both of them had immediately jumped at the chance when I had hesitantly asked them to let the both of us meet up here, I had been desperately trying to find a place outside of my apartment where we could meet up.

When I entered the shop through the back it was already deserted just for us, she must have contacted Maggie and Dan to ask them if we could have the store for the night. The store was packed full of the rare books the owners had both acquired over the years, ranging from old tales and poems written by Edgar Allan Poe, the dark brother’s Grimm tales, to almost any old book that you could think of. It was almost to the point where I thought maybe Maggie and Dan should upgrade to a bigger shop.

“Long time no see.” A voice piped up from the mostly dark corner where she sat in a dark green armchair only partially illuminated by a standing lamp. Broad grins broke out on both of our faces before we both ran to each other, engulfing ourselves into an overwhelming bear hug.

“I missed you so much you don't even know.” Tears prickled at the edge of my eyes, though I wasn’t afraid to admit that us being apart for so long made me tear up.

“I've got a pretty good idea, I missed you so much as well.” She sniffed and then sighed into the crook of my neck. I moved my hand up to cradle her head to try and bring her as close as possible to me, even though there was already not even an inch of space between the two of us.

A nagging thought was dancing around in my brain, the card was so short and abrupt. It wasn’t like her to not be long winded whenever she wrote to me, she even had a tendency to be worse than I was sometimes.

“Why was the card so short? You feeling ok?”

“I just couldn’t wait to see you… It’s been so long since I’ve seen you...” Her tone of voice made me sad, it had been so lonely for me as well when we were apart.  “I never want to be away from you for that long ever again.”

“Move in with me.” The words blurted out of my mouth before I could really think about my words. I didn’t care whether it would be feasible or not, I just knew I never wanted us to be apart for so long ever again.

“Well-“ I cringed a little at her words sensing a rejection, I worried that I had just screwed it all up by asking. However, again she surprised me, “We might need to get a new place to settle my father’s worries about security.”

I breathed out a breathy laugh of relief at her words, enveloping her into a bruising kiss, my worry and anxiety immediately melting away. I couldn’t wait for the next chapter of my life with the President’s daughter.

—-

Tag list (Message me if you want to be added):

All works: @shotarosleftpinky

Spencer Reid/CM:

@calm-and-doctor @destiny-tsukino @safertokiss

Spencer Reid & Letters Series:

@sierraraeck @90spumkin @whoreforthebau

[terapsina]

Ao3 Fic Meme

@electricbluebutterflies did this thing and mentioned that anyone who wants can do it too. I wanted to.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

96, but most of them are really short one shots so it's really not as impressive as that number makes it look.

2. What is your total AO3 word count?

241'178. Huh.

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

The Vampire Diaries (TV) (21)

Once Upon a Time (TV) (9)

Person of Interest (TV) (9)

Shadowhunters (TV) (7)

Leverage (7)

Doctor Who (2005) (5)

Legacies (TV 2018) (4)

Merlin (TV) (4)

Arrow (TV 2012) (4)

Batwoman (TV 2019) (3)

Captain Marvel (2019) (3)

The Originals (TV) (2)

The 100 (TV) (2)

The Good Place (TV) (2)

The Old Guard (Movie 2020) (2)

Avatar: Legend of Korra (2)

DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV) (2)

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV) (2)

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV) (2)

The Magicians (TV) (2)

Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling (2)

Supergirl (TV 2015) (2)

Star Wars - All Media Types (1)

Star Wars: Rebels (1)

Sweet/Vicious (TV) (1)

Stargate SG-1 (1)

Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types (1)

Lost Girl (TV) (1)

Legend of the Seeker (TV) (1)

Angel: the Series (1)

Revolution (TV) (1)

Hustlers (2019) (1)

Teen Wolf (TV) (1)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

The Suspicious Case of Tribbles - the second of my four River/13 reunion one shots, as seen from the POV of Yaz.

Yaz and Ryan are working on a little project inside the TARDIS when they get interrupted by an unfamiliar intruder.

/OR/

"Don't mind me. Carry on!" The woman says, dropping a bag of something heavy that sounds like a bag of rocks to the floor and hurrying towards the TARDIS controls. "I'm only here to establish an alibi. A short hop over to the other side of the hemisphere and some 38 planetary hours in the past should do it. I'll send you lot right back to him none the wiser. It'll be our little secret."

5 Times The Doctor Talked About River Song With Graham (+1 Time The Fam Finally Met Her) - the fourth (and in my opinion the best) of my River/13 reunion fics, as seen from the POV of Graham.

His eyes follow the small golden object as its slide down the floor stops in the middle of TARDIS, and finally focuses on the last thing he’d have ever expected to find here if he’d ever thought to consider it.

It’s a ring.

/or/

Graham finds the Doctor's wedding ring and it leads to her gradually opening up about their lost wife.

Morai's Call to Hope - my Clone Wars/Rebels gen WIP, where Anakin gets pulled into the future so that I can hammer some sense into him and so that Ahsoka can get that damn hug fic. I have NOT abandoned it. I've just not been a very writing mood this year, but it's picking up again and after I finish my very newest fic I'm planning to go back to this one.

Moments after Anakin walks away from Ahsoka and so takes the first of his last steps down the path that would lead him beyond saving, he hears the cooing hoot of a convor and feels talons piercing into his shoulder.

Next thing he knows he's in a desert of dark sand following ghostly voices that lead him to the sight of an older version of his former Padawan confronting a figure cloaked in black.

Maybe he was brought there just to observe but when he sees Ahsoka under threat he does what he's always done when someone he loves is in danger, he charges ahead and deals with the consequences later.

OR

Instead of future Ezra it is an Anakin days before his fall who sees Ahsoka's fight with Vader. And instead of pulling Ahsoka inside with him he crosses the border of the portal to join her in confronting something that will turn out to be his worst nightmare.

You know who you remind me of? - the first of my River/13 reunion fics, as seen from the POV of the Doctor herself.

The Doctor and Yasmin are in the middle of rescuing a stolen dragon egg from being sold in an auction, - and hiding under a table - when the Doctor hears the sound of her wife's laughter.

/OR/

“What?” Yasmin says, seeming to get derailed from her irritation. “You look fine. Is this about the old face again?”

Help Inside the Stormcage - the third of my River/13 reunion fics, as seen from the POVs of Yaz, River and the Doctor. I don't know if you can tell but I kinda really want a River and Thirteenth Doctor reunion.

The Doctor's in trouble and the TARDIS brings the gang to Stormcage.

/OR/

“We could get arrested for this.” Graham says, sounding worried.

“Then it’s a good thing we’re already inside a prison isn’t it?” Yaz whispers and bends to look around the corner to see if they’ve finally come across a cell block. “The TARDIS brought us here for a reason. The Doctor needs help, if we’re finding that help inside a space prison then we’re breaking into a space prison.”

5. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I try to. I absolutely adore getting comments so I want to thank everyone who leaves them but sometimes I don't feel ready to answer immediately and I leave it for later, and then it's been two weeks and I feel too embarrassed and guilty to answer.

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Last Words - my Korrasami fic that I wrote when I came up with the idea of soulmate-identifying LAST words. I'm very sorry.

Every person is born with the last words their soulmate will ever say to them written on their wrists and invisible to anyone but themselves. Asami has known that Korra is her soulmate for a very long time, and has never been anxious to be proven correct, but sooner or later that day comes for everyone.

7. Do you write crossovers?

Sometimes. I've got a Leverage/Stargate SG-1 crossover fic that I'm still kind of proud of even though it ended up being a source of some of the meanest comments I've ever gotten. Two Leverage/Person of Interest fics, one a one-shot and the other a chaptered fic that I never ended up finishing even though I did really like writing it. A Once Upon a Time/Person of Interest one-shot I wrote in response to a prompt. Another unfinished Arrow/Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D fic based on the premise that Skye was Nyssa's sister (I wrote it before we found out who her father was and she became Daisy). And a really old and pretty embarrassing Doctor Who/Teen Wolf drabble where the Doctor and Donna come across Derek and the Doctor nopes out of there because Derek's got bad luck juju.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yes. The worst of it was because of that Leverage/Stargate fic I mentioned. I kind of wrote an abrupt ending that would have probably worked better in a one-shot and people got mad and mean. And I had actually planned that fic to be the first in a series of fics but the comments kind of took all the joy out of it for me.

There's been some other hate here and there too. But that's the one that hurt me the most. Of course it kind of also gave me thicker skin against those kinds of comments so now I can read those when they come with some dark amusement and shake them off.

9. Do you write smut? If you do, what kind of smut do you write?

No. I sometimes write the lead up to smut, a bit of hot simmer you could say, but not the smut itself. Idk why, I'm just not that comfortable with writing it.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so? Not that I'm aware of anyway.

11. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. I'm not sure how that would work and it sounds like it would be complicated to actually make happen and have the fic come out good. But I have been curious about trying it, so maybe someday.

12. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I really can't decide on just one. But I have a few that are my favorite to write for. And those are probably Swan Queen, Elejah, Clizzy and River/13.

13. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

I think the first fic I ever wrote was a BtVS/Stargate SG-1 crossover that I think I've long since deleted. But basically it was a very tropey and self-inserty mess about a Slayer (I think I named her Kira), who would find out her real father is Jack O'Neill and track him down, and then I think she'd run across Oz at some point. I never actually got that far in writing it honestly.

14. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

I really don't have just one. But I think these are the ones I'm MOST proud of. The ones I just put the most effort in and I actually enjoy re-reading on occasion to remind myself that I actually do know how to write on a semi decent basis if not exactly brilliantly.

5 Times The Doctor Talked About River Song With Graham (+1 Time The Fam Finally Met Her) - which I've already described earlier.

Morai's Call to Hope - same.

5 Times Monica and Her Mom Have Difficult Conversations About Auntie Carol (+1 Time She Plans A Parent Trap With Her Skrull Friend) - my Danbeau fic from the POV of Monica from the point in time when Carol went missing up until a year after she came back. It starts out angsty but moves toward fluffy and finishes funny.

“Hey, honey.” Mom says, voice hoarse, and drops to her knees in front of Monica. She smiles at her, but it’s small and weak and only makes Monica more scared. “Let me talk to Grandma and Grandpa for a minute, and then- then I have to tell you something. Okay?”

“Where’s Auntie Carol?”

/or/

When one loses a parent, one's other parent inevitably has some really hard conversations with their kids. Those conversations don't grow easier when a miracle happens and that parent comes back. But their nature might change, especially when the child in question is Monica Rambeau and she finds herself rather unhappy with the snail-paced speed at which her moms seem to have decided to move.

what you gon’ do (when there’s blood in the water) - the Mary Hamilton gen fic filled with angsty sisters feelings about Kate, and Alice being both terrifying and protective and possibly developing a bit of a soft spot for Mary as well. I wrote it very early on though so there's no mess with Mary's mom's death.

“You’re going to put all the red, red rubies back inside her chest or I’m going to bleed them out of you instead.” Alice singsongs, eyes pointedly sliding sideways.

Batwoman is unconscious and bleeding out in front of her clinic, with something that looks like the length of an arrow sticking out of her stomach. So Mary’s got a homicidal villain and a potentially dying vigilante on her hands and… wow, she really regrets not drinking that fifth cup of coffee.

/or/

The obligatory 'Mary finds out Kate is Batwoman in the most stressful manner possible' fic.

One Ring to Ruin It All (Not On Henry's Watch) - my fix it fic for the Swan Queen. Where Henry is a good kid who steals the ring he finds in Hook's pocket and talks with his mom.

"What is it you've got there, Henry?" Emma asked as she walked into the living room.

"Nothing!" Henry yelped and in a split second decision stuffed the ring into his own pocket instead of back in Hook's coat.

/or/

Henry finds the ring and proceeds to save his mothers from themselves.

the ones that seek and find (six years in the relationship of harry and luna) - the Luna/Harry fic where I rewrite canon so that they meet in Harry's second year, become friends and slowly fall in love. It's very cute and contains the way I imagine Luna being, a bit weird and off-beat but not a caricature or totally alien, and hopefully it shows that she's also very capable of anger and other such emotions too.

“You can go when we say you can go, Loony.” The biggest of the bullies says and pulls up her wand higher, now pointing it directly in the girl’s face. Harry doesn’t know the bully’s name but thinks she might be a third year.

A third year who looks about ready to cast a spell at an unarmed first year in a fight that’s three to one. He thinks he’s seen quite enough.

“Hey,” Harry yells to startle them and pulls out his own wand, “leave her alone!”

/or/

By chance of fate Harry Potter meets Luna Lovegood in his second year instead of his fifth. It doesn’t really change anything for the magical world at large but it changes quite a lot for the young witch and wizard themselves. Here are six glimpses into their relationship from the moment they meet until the end of the war.

She's Come Undone and Set Free - the TVD fic I'm currently working on. Containing an Elena who has just regained her emotions but instead of letting go of her anger against the Salvatores actually keeps her justified rage. And then she finally learns about exactly what Caroline went through early s1. So I'm addressing ALL of the things that bothered me in canon. Also, has a bunch of Elejah stuff.

She’d been free. Freed from a conscience she couldn’t afford to give up again. Free from the grief she’d never actually wanted to abandon, not until the choice was taken from her. But also free from the two brothers that had been taking choices away from her from the moment they’d come to town.

And she didn’t want to give that freedom up. She wouldn’t. Not ever again.

/or/

When Elena feels her humanity returning she finds herself focusing on having finally been free from the Salvatore brothers, and doesn't abandon her justified anger. Unfortunately, she also realizes that her sire bond to Damon isn't fully broken and goes to Rebekah for help, help that involves a little trip to New Orleans.

On the way, Elena will have to deal with her newly returned humanity as well as some long-awaited truths about Caroline's old relationship with the older Salvatore.

There are some things that even the most compassionate person could never forgive.

-

Anyone else who wants to do this, feel free to consider yourselves tagged ❤️

[starlessea]

Ultimate Guide To Writing Second Person POV

Y/N, You, and Everything in Between

Hey everyone, here’s another post for my writing tips series - this time focusing on how to write in second person.

As a lot of fanfics are written in this POV, you’re probably already familiar with seeing ‘You’ or ‘Y/N’ to describe the reader. But, I wanted to give a few tips on how to construct this type of character - keeping it accessible, whilst not making it too vague/general either.

1) The Reader Insert

One of the most common tropes in fanfiction is to use ‘Y/N’ in place of a character name. It is literally an abbreviation for ‘your name,’ and therefore allows the reader to insert themselves into the fic.

There’s a lot of debate surrounding the use of ‘Y/N.’ Personally, I think it’s fine, and I find it quite unfair when a lot of people show undeserved bias towards it. There is, by no means, any correlation between the standard of writing and whether or not an author uses ‘Y/N.’ It is just personal preference!

However, you must ensure the following things if you are going to use it:

Be consistent in capitalisation - it’s a pet peeve to see it rendered as ‘Y/n,’ ‘Y/N,’ and ‘y/n’ all in a single fic. Pick one and stick to it.

Don’t overuse it - something about the dash really sticks out like a sore thumb. I try to use it for emphasis mainly, like if someone is talking to the character in an emotional moment. But don’t forget that you can use VARIATION, too. Such as:

He called your name.

“Did you hear me?” She asked, and repeated your name.

“I’ve called your name three times now.”

“Y/N!” He yelled, over the sound of the engine.

If you’re writing a multi-chapter fic, keep in mind that although ‘Y/N’ is meant to refer to a general name, it shouldn’t always refer to a general character! What I mean by this is, nobody wants to read a long fanfiction where the main character lacks any distinguishable features, personality traits, or development.

Just because your pronouns and naming system is vague doesn’t mean your character should be! You need to give them distinguishable characteristics - even if it’s as simple as them liking music, having a specific family background, having certain speech patterns.

As much as we might be tempted to write as inclusively as we can, it is unrealistic to have a ‘one-size-fits-all character in EVERY scenario.’ One of the main points of criticism against ‘Y/N’ is that they lack DEPTH.

Another thing to note is that there are chrome extensions like InteracticeFics - where you can enter your name at the start of a fanfic and it’ll automatically replace ‘Y/N’ with it. You may have seen those little boxes on certain Tumblr posts that allow you to do this!

2) The Impersonal ‘You’

This is just a phrase I’ve coined to describe fics that replace ‘Y/N’ exclusively with ‘you.’ I almost visualise it as a sort of hierarchy of depth, or a sliding scale that goes from Y/N > Impersonal You > Personal You > OC.

What I mean by this is, if we think of an OC, they are often a fully fleshed out character. They’ll have a full name, age, appearance, background, likes/dislikes etc. Whereas, with Y/N and the Impersonal You, we can often get away with glossing over these things - or generalising them (but not TOO much, remember).

The Impersonal You is for those who don’t like the visual look of ‘Y/N.’ It is more traditional, and I find that it takes away from the reading experience less. However, there are still pitfalls with this form:

There is a lack of variation - unlike the previous example, here you can’t switch between ‘Y/N’ and ‘you.’ Often, you’ll find that your fics become completely littered with the word, since it describes both the PERSON (the pronoun, replacing he/she/they) and the NAME. So you may find yourself left with something like this:

You finished tying your shoes and look up at the man, already looking at you. “Are you done?” He asked. “I’ve been calling you for the last ten minutes.” You nodded, as he repeated your name to get your attention.

In that passage alone there was 8 instances of ‘you/your.’ In terms of correctness, there is nothing wrong with it. However, it leaves much to be desired stylistically.

You need to be aware of this if you’re writing in this form, and maybe carry out this visual exercise of ‘you’ spotting and counting to check. Instead, try to experiment with adverbs and playing around with syntax order. We could write something like this:

Tying your shoelaces, you looked up at the man to see that he was already looking at you. “Ya done yet?” He asked. “I’ve been callin’ for the last ten minutes.” You nodded, as he repeated himself to get your attention.

3) The Personal ‘You’

This form is the bridge between the Impersonal You and an OC. It is used to describe someone who is almost an original character, whilst still keeping them relatable. I like this example especially, since it allows for a lot of variation and style.

One of the fics I’m writing, for instance, is about a teacher. Therefore, although I use ‘you’ the majority of the time, I’m also granted the extra variety of ‘Teach.’ A lot of my other characters use that nickname to refer to her. So it’s a good idea to have some distinguishable features that can be used as identifiers - like a certain profession for example.

I’ve also read another fic about a doctor, where everyone calls her ‘Doc,’ and another one where the character is identified by the name of the gang she belongs to. So, it doesn’t always have to be a job - it can be hobbies, interests, an embarrassing secret, a pet name etc.

Here are a few examples:

“Hey, Sunshine.” He greeted, giving you a kiss on the cheek.

“Get over here, Teach!” She called, and you quickly ran over to hear people muttering your name.

“Well if it isn’t that biker chick I’ve heard so much about.”

“I want to get to know you better, Doc.” He said, and you started by telling him your name. “That’s pretty” He replied, trying it out for himself as he struggled to pronounce it.

4) General Points

Nicknames

As we’ve just gone through, nicknames, pet names, or little identifiers can be a great way to gain some variation - and give an insight into your character’s background. Even if you’re writing in the ‘Y/N’ form, you can use general ones like ‘sweetheart’ etc. to show the relationships between your characters.

Abbreviated Names

With these nicknames, or professions, try out the long forms but also abbreviate them for variation:

Doctor > Doc

Teacher > Teach

And have different characters say them in different ways, or use different ones to address your main character. For example, you might want to emphasise different accents.

Darling > Darlin’

A Nameless Character

It might even be fun to take a meta approach, where your character is consciously aware that they don’t have a name. I read an interesting fic where the reader ironically belonged to a group called ‘nameless’ - and that’s what people called her by.

Or, you could have a character with amnesia - and watch as other people give them an array of nicknames throughout your story.

That’s it for now! I hope you found this part helpful. Send me a message if there’s any other topics you want covered.

[imbellarosa]

Let’s Talk Calm-ly about Two Loves

OR: When you’re a grown man who writes stories for a living, you definitely wrote your own weird bedtime story, too. 

The TLDR here is that H has taken one specific listener around the globe, notably to Tokyo and Jamaica. He quotes an old Victorian Poet who was an awful human but who’s lasting legacy is the phrase “a love that dare not speak its name” which is - you guessed it - a reference to queer love. He also is super excited to spend what seems like the foreseeable future with this listener and has bought a little house with a garden of daisies with them and it’s very sweet and domestic. Anyways this is a wild time and it’s all under a cut because it’s...really a lot. 

Anyways I think the people I owe thank yous this times around to are @queenlokibeth​ who had to listen to me scream about this for a while, Astrid, who screamed with me when this came out, and “M” who convinced me to finally get to work in this fandom. And, of course, all of the lovely people tagged below who’s work I used to build my argument. 

1.) Who Wrote “Dream With Me”? 

Well, not H, or so the story goes. Two other people (Steve Cleverly and Sanj Sen) did! I mean, right, okay, for a while I was like...that seems like an odd choice for a man who didn’t want to hand Two Ghosts over to his own band because it seemed too personal. He wrote on every song in both albums’ he’s released thus far, because he seems to be passionate about telling the stories he wants to tell (even if he won’t tell you explicitly what they’re about). But for a while, I was totally going with the flow there, and the rest of this analysis would still stand: the writer of this story definitely referenced a poem by Lord Alfred Douglas and Harry’s own songs. 

However, I then read this fun quote from the Co-founder and CEO of Calm: 

“Well,” he said, “The the Harry Styles one is interesting because that came purely from Harry Styles himself...we took the approach of creating a sort of musical epic poem – he doesn’t sing, it’s spoken with poetry, but there’s a sort of musical sound bed to it and it’s pulling on things and themes that Harry’s fans really adore about him and associate with him. So his story was driven really by him – we really created a concept around him.” 

-  Chris Advansun, July 7th, 2020 via @hlupdate​

And I thought, hmmm. This does not sound like a project that he was not involved in creating. From this point on (July, 7th 2020), I began to think of it as a three way co-collaboration between him and the other two authors. But this confused me a bit, because there was largely a nonreaction from the fandom. I was waiting for an actual transcript, because I always fall asleep to these meditation stories, but it was being referenced to as some sort of Y/N fic, which was...honestly not what I expected, but also not implausible, thanks to the ~lovely~ image this man has had since the age of sixteen. But also, twitter seemed to be concerned by other things at the moment, and no one was analyzing the story. . 

In fact, I messaged a friend the day that this story dropped, because it had been kind of a shit show day on Twitter. Rumors were sort of flying about everyone and everything: had Liam shaved his head? Was he engaged? Had he and Maya broken up? Were Zayn and Gigi engaged? Had they broken up? Did Niall have a girlfriend? (this one was true lol). Were Elounor engaged? Were they pregnant? Had they broken up??? My personal fav was the bald Liam rumor, which he promptly put to rest in LP Act 1 by...having a huge mane of hair. 

So then I thought - huh. Why has today looked like this? I’m not saying that there aren’t days that twitter goes wild because of boredom, because there definitely is - the articles about secret meetings in Italy that are coming out this week (8/12/2020) are proof positive. So that definitely does happen, but it doesn’t usually happen on the days that there’s a lot of content. And maybe I’ve just been starved for content in this fandom, but I would consider a 40 minute video quite a bit of content. 

Then the transcript dropped. I’m using two as references - this one on Wattpad and also @carl-and-pearl ‘s version here (thank you so much for the transcript!!). We’re going to get into a more detailed description of what’s going on in the story, but the first thing I recognized immediately is that it was first person POV. I knew that going in, based on the number of Y/N jokes going around on twitter. Then I read it aloud, and I realized that it read like a letter. Like an experience specific to the writer and the reader. And while that’s not super uncommon to write about an experience from the author’s POV - I listen to a podcast called Nothing Much Happens: bedtime stories for adults which has a similar concept - I thought it was odd that they were trying to include both the author and the listener. I completely understood why the y/n jokes were pertinent. But at the same time, it felt like something had snagged in my mind - like a particularly annoying splinter. 

The conversations I was having around this story - completely based on the content, concept, and my own instinct - was that this story contained specific references to one person. I thought that it did read like a love letter, and that most identifying features would have been taken out, but the essence remained. Which, once I thought about it, was something that H excelled at doing. Think about Sunflower Vol 6 and Adore You and Canyon Moon and even Watermelon Sugar and Golden.  Ask yourself, What do I know about the person they are about? They have skin that browns, they have a secret, they have mesmerizing eyes, they’re willing to dance in the kitchen with him (to dancehall), they have a belly, they’ve been through hard times, they’re witty, they have an accent, and they have lips. I know - super specific right?

So the splinter grew into a thorn - what was I missing? And then - when I was looking for something completely different - I stumbled upon this old interview Harry did with Zach Sang and the Gang Show back in 2017.  For context, he was being asked about Sweet Creature. As you can imagine, it’s hard for people to believe he wrote such a beautiful love song when he hadn’t ever really had a long term relationship (two hearts in one home?? Who did you move in with, you can imagine them asking. When did you have time?). So what did he have to say about this?

"In my opinion,” he explained, “I think most songs are written for one listener. Maybe there's one thing in there that only they'll notice about them.... It's so much easier to say something in a song than it is to say it to someone and I think it's really amazing to be able to communicate through that and be able to wrap up everything that you want to say in three and a half minutes and say it in a song."

- HS, May 3 2017

By this time, please believe that I was screeching. Seeing this felt like he put into words the exact feeling I had about “Dream With Me”. It felt like a nod to someone that I didn’t know, which made the story hard to listen to, tbh. Although, I will say that when I did finally listen to it, it knocked me out and gave me odd dreams so. Once was enough for me haha! 

So my new operating theory is exactly what Advansun said: I think that H was the primary writer/the driving force behind the story. Because of the references I’m about to run through, because it feels like the way he tells stories, and because they admitted to him being more involved than they originally claimed. That’s going to be how I write the rest of the analysis - under the impression that H had a direct hand in the story that was being put forth. However, I think that the analysis itself would stand whether or not he wrote any of it. It would just be a more tenuous reflection of him than I believe it to be. 

2.) How Do I Love Thee? In Two Ways. 

Before I jump into the story, let’s talk a little about the poem that I want to compare it to: Two Loves, by Lord Alfred Douglas.  Let’s be clear this is not at all a defense of who Bosie was - he was a terrible person, particularly in his later years, when he’d converted to Catholicism and turned his back on his younger self, and his partner, Oscar Wilde. He was violently anti-Semitic, and turned his back on his own community. I want to get this out of the way because I very much believe that we should examine artists for who they are. That is, after all, what I am trying to do here. 

But his poem Two Loves has often been used - much to his disappointment, I’m sure - as an exploration of queer love in Victorian times. A line that I will be exploring more deeply in a second was in fact used against Oscar Wilde in his trail for indecency . He attempted - unsuccessfully - to explain it away, but it was too blatantly about their relationship for even the British Victorian society to ignore. I really, really recommend a read of this poem, because it is - despite it’s author - a good piece of work, which explores the themes of shame and love and longing between two men in that time. 

I’m going to start with my own background, as someone who’s analyzed fandoms before. I first came across this poem in the Sherlock fandom, with this analysis by @the-7-percent-solution​, when I was running in that fandom, and she explains the poem brilliantly in just a few lines. I’m going to take a little longer to run through it, but if you want a concise explanation and a brilliant meta, I encourage you to run to their blog and check it out. That fandom taught me most everything I know about catching symbols and recurring themes and “clueing for looks” and I love it desperately, still. 

But we’re here to talk about this fandom, so on with the poem! Essentially, the poem outlines a dream the speaker had: In his dream, he’s standing in a field with flowers - beautiful ones of all kind - and he meets this young man with clear blue eyes and bright red lips and they kiss a bit and have a picnic, and it’s all lovely. If you think I’m kidding, I’m really not. Please, read it for yourself. 

Anyways, after they did they did the whole picnic thing, the speaker and his date go on a walk in this field, where they come across two figures. The first is described as, 

“...fair and blooming, and a sweet refrain Came from his lips; he sang of pretty maids And joyous love of comely girl and boy, His eyes were bright, and 'mid the dancing blades Of golden grass his feet did trip for joy; And in his hand he held an ivory lute With strings of gold that were as maidens' hair, And sang with voice as tuneful as a flute, And round his neck three chains of roses were.” 

- Two Loves, 1894

The speaker, however, was drawn to the second figure: 

“He was full sad and sweet, and his large eyes Were strange with wondrous brightness, staring wide With gazing; and he sighed with many sighs That moved me, and his cheeks were wan and white Like pallid lilies, and his lips were red Like poppies, and his hands he clenched tight, And yet again unclenched, and his head Was wreathed with moon-flowers pale as lips of death. A purple robe he wore, o'erwrought in gold With the device of a great snake, whose breath Was fiery flame..”

- Two Loves, 1984

Of course, the speaker immediately asks the second man who he is. The second man says, “My name is Love”. The first man corrects him quickly: 

“ He lieth, for his name is Shame, But I am Love, and I was wont to be Alone in this fair garden, till he came Unasked by night; I am true Love, I fill The hearts of boy and girl with mutual flame.”

-Two Loves, 1984

The second man sighs and acquiesces, “Have thy will. I am the love that dare not speak its name.” 

It was, of course, this last line that really gave the meaning of the poem away. It was the line that was put to Oscar Wilde as proof of a romantic relationship, it was the line that went down in history as a way to refer to queer love, and it was the line that first stuck out to me when I was reading “Dream With Me”. 

The reading here is clearly that “Love” is the love that is acceptable to society - easy, sweet, and cherished. “Shame” is the love that happens in secret - beautiful, alluring to the speaker, passionate, anxious ( as can be seen in the clenching and unclenching of his hands), and proud. He refuses to call himself as anything but what he is. The first man may call him Shame, but he refuses the name, and instead, offers a qualifier to his own descriptor. He is still love, he is just the love that can’t be spoken about. 

3.) Walking in Golden Fields of Sunflowers

Now let’s talk about “Dream With Me”. I’m ignoring the first few stanzas (from the line “Have you ever wondered” to “What the two of us can find”.) because those are pretty standard introductory paragraphs to a guided meditation. So we start with the line “Let’s travel now to moonlit valleys...”. 

I’m going to do the same thing I did with “Two Loves” first. I am going to describe literally, in general terms, what happens in the story. Warning, I change pronouns from “they” to “you” because the whole thing confuses me, but note that I’m always talking about the speaker and the listener: 

So after doing the standard intro, the speaker and the listener take a walk through the woods enjoying nature, particularly the grass, the trees, and the blue sky above. You’re already clearly in love. Then you’re magically on a raft, with cherry blossoms all around you. If you want a good visual for that, here’s a site that has pictures from a boat rental in Tokyo where you can snuggle on a raft in the  Chidorigafuchi moat. And then suddenly it starts raining, and they (you) watch the rain for a hot second, and then the scene magically shifts again, and you’re under a porch (although I guess it could be the boat rental’s porch. They do usually have covered areas). 

Kind of furthering that theory, they then lounge by the shoreline, skipping stones and hanging out, looking at the snow capped mountains. In case you’re curious, because at this point I sure was, you can see mountains from certain areas in the city of Tokyo. 

Anyways, then it’s snowing, and you’re magically in a cabin, just chilling by the fire, and you fall asleep again. You wake up somewhere else.

Where are you now? Well, you’re on a tropical island filled with palm trees. As an American, my mind immediately jumps to the Caribbean, but I suppose it could absolutely be in the Mediterranean as well. The island has white beaches, mangroves, a turquoise ocean, and a gorgeous, peaceful atmosphere. 

If you’re curious as to what a mangrove looks like - and I certainly was - they are a group of trees and shrubs that live in the coastal intertidal zone and Jamaica is doing a massive restoration project involving primary school children to regrow this vital part of their ecosystem. More interestingly, there currently exist no mangrove forests in the Mediterranean, so my initial feeling that this scene would take place in the Caribbean was correct. On that note - again, because I was curious - Jamaica has gorgeous white sand beaches with turquoise oceans. 

But I’ve gone off topic again! After you’re minds are “in tune” once more (trying to find a heartbeat, anyone?), you reappear in a meadow, with beautiful flowers of all kind, where you are now walking hand in hand through a field of sunflowers, which give the feeling a “warm and golden hue”. Then you come across a little farmhouse with daisies poking out (clearly I have no way of locating this anywhere in the world, but I assume that the UK has both sunflowers and daisies). It’s an empty house which was loved and left because of the passage of time, which inspires my favorite line in the poem: “ The thought of passing time inspires/A feeling that grows stronger”. It’s just...really sweet to me. 

So, of course, they do what anyone would do when they come across an empty farmhouse, they go inside. And there, they begin to fall asleep, reflecting on all they have just seen, referencing other scenes of the poem: “ Moonlit valleys, Burdened forests, Gazing at the ocean. Summer meadows, Tranquil sunsets steeped in emotion”. 

The next few stanzas are just going to be copy-pasted, and then I’ll go into them a bit, but this is the end of the poem, so they’re the final reflections;

“The tenderness we feel When we are close Two minds as one Surrounds us and connects us But we’ve only just begun.

For now we dream together Of all there is to follow. And know that sleep will keep us safe From now until tomorrow.

Maybe all the memories That we’ve gathered here tonight Are all dreams now remembered Or wishes in plain sight.

No matter what They’re with us now. For this night and forever. And every time we close our eyes They’re yours and mine to treasure.” 

- HS, Dream With Me, via @carl-and-pearl​

And that’s it! The literal story, in short, is that you started in a forest, then went to Tokyo (maybe) and then Jamaica (perhaps) and then back to a field of sunflowers and daisies in the UK (which is also a guess, it could be Italy or France or Idaho for all I know, but let’s call it an educated guess). 

4.) My Dream Journal

So now that we know what happens in the story, how do we interpret this? Well, There are a few lines in the poem that I want to draw your attention to: the first takes place in the first part of this story, when you’re still in the forest. This is, I must say, the most direct reference to Two Loves in the whole poem/song/story. Both works are describing a walk in the woods with your loved one, and, in a fun reference in the middle of the story, Dream With Me says

The shimmering reflection Shows us smiling from above. But what we think But dare not speak is L-O-V-E love.

-Dream With Me, 2020

Remember that line I mentioned before? I am the love that dare not speak its name. Right, so that’s almost a direct quote. It also has a really fun nod to “I Would” (Would he say he’s in L-O-V-E?/Well if it was me then I would), but I digress. 

This first part of the narrative, I feel, really sets up what the rest of it will look and feel like, in the same way that “Golden” sets the tone for Fine Line. (You didn’t think I was going to make a post about Harry and NOT mention Golden, did you?? If you did, I’m disappointed!!). So  let’s take a look at what’s happening, and the language he’s using to describe it. 

One of the best things about this poem is how vivid it feels. Of course, I’m about to argue that it’s vivid because it was based in reality, but let’s talk about the sheer amount of detail he uses to describe the place he’s walking through. The valley (canyon lmao) is moonlit, the grass and the leaves make mosaics of green, you’re walking by the heather (the symbolism of heather is good luck, admiration, and protection), the sepia sunlight breaks through the trees. 

You know what it kind of sounds like? Sweet Creature. You’re about to roll your eyes at me! I can feel it! But listen, okay?  

“Sweet creature Running through the garden Oh, where nothing bothered us But we're still young I always think about you and how we don't speak enough”

Which, to be honest, sounds like what they’re doing. They’re walking through the garden in the sun, not daring to speak about the Love that he (they both) feel, and instead refering to it in veiled Victorian terms. 

And then we head to Tokyo! I know that you’re about to ask me why I think it’s Tokyo versus...idk, anywhere else? Well, for one, he went to Tokyo (to let it go) publicly in 2019. He was there for a few months, and there are some great pictures of that time: 

Look! Here he is with his club owner friend and his dog, and a fun red bandanna! But let’s be honest, the dog really steals the show here. But wait! there’s more! More dog content, too!

This was on Jan 31st, 2019, and he’s taking the dog for a walk! Very cute! If nothing else, he spent a lot of time with dogs in Tokyo! And the city fits the description of the story. So I feel rather comfortable with my interpretation that this first date is a memory of this trip - or another - to Tokyo. 

So what did “you both”do in Tokyo? Well, chill on a raft while the cherry blossoms flutter around you, clearly. You also refocused your purpose. What did he do in Tokyo in 2019? Well, he took time to think about and write songs for the album he was about to go record. Kind of like refocusing on what’s next, right? And then, in the story when “you both” had time to think amongst the lake and the water and the rain and the moon, and you’d come to the conclusions you needed to, you left. What did he do when he did the things he needed to? Well, he left, too. 

And where did he go? Well, in real life, I suppose he went to do his job. But, in the story, you’re meant to be falling deeper and deeper into sleep, so it’s sort of like traveling backwards, you see? Like counting down to one. So you end up on this island with turquoise ocean and mangrove forests. I’m calling this Jamaica. Why? Well, the description fits, for one, down to the four types of mangroves that exists within its ecosystem. 

And - probably the biggest reason - I can place him there, too. Here’s him in 2017:

I added this picture because the water around him....looks rather turquoise, doesn’t it? Kind of like he’s enjoying his time on a tropical island by the beach?? Oh, and here’s another one!: 

The red bandanna makes a comeback! 

So what are you doing in Jamaica, according to the story? Well, you’re hanging out, basically. Enjoying the beach and each other, of course!  What else? To be exact, “[Your] thoughts dovetail and unify/ In tune two minds together”. I’m so glad that you’re tuned like an old guitar now! Congrats! Really happy for you! 

What was he doing in Jamaica three years ago? Why, he was recording his first album, or so the story goes. I’ll tell you something: finding press for that album was literally the most difficult part of this whole analysis. I got a fair bit of the tattoo roulette with Kendall Jenner, and some things about Carolina, but the interview with Zach Sang took me like an hour and a half to find again to link. The fact that a lot of it has been buried is...not great, for posterity purposes. He’s going to want that one day. 

But I’ve gotten off track again! We gotta go back and finish our story, right? What happens now? Well, this does: 

hahahaha okay, I’m really sorry, but I had to. I’m not, actually, making it up though! According to the story: 

“ As minutes turn to hours We drift off somewhere new. And visualize a stairway To a door we now walk through”

- Dream With Me, 2020

So maybe Louis was just...demonstrating for you. 

Anyways! Where do you walk out to? A golden field full of sunflowers. You walk for a minute, then come across an old house with daisies popping up out of the garden. And that’s where the story ends. I guess you’ve made that farmhouse feel like home. 

Now to the little reflection he does on the outro. The lines I want to bring your attention are: “The tenderness we feel when we are close two minds as one surrounds us and connects us but we’ve only just begun” and “Maybe all the memories that we’ve gathered here tonight are all dreams now remembered or wishes in plain sight.”

Let’s talk about the first sentence first. In the context of finding a home that could be a shared home, and a future, this is very much an “end of the story, beginning of our lives” sort of thing. You’re back from all over, and it’s time to settle down, and see what’s next. 

And now the second sentence. I think this is the one that really drives my point about this story being a collection of memories he has - that’s what he calls it. The story is “gathered memories” that might also be called “remembered dreams” (think of how people say of vacations, “oh it was a dream!”) or you might call it “wishes in plain sight”. This feels in line with the rest of the story. In this stanza, he’s sort of letting you in a bit. If I’ve read this right - and I really think that I have - he’s giving the larger context for the story. It’s a collection of memories he’s had with someone he loves. 

5.) Cool! Can you prove it? 

I mean, I’d argue that if you read this far, I have proved it, but let’s make some more links, shall we? This was called a “muscial epic” that was “driven by him”. I’d argue that if I know my Victorian literature (thank you, Sherlock!), then he definitely does. Then there’s the fact that he quoted it, so. That did happen. And he knows what it means. And even if he didn’t, there were two other people on the story. Someone was more than capable of catching that one, and the fact that they didn’t speaks to intent. They want you to think of that phrase when you read this poem. They want you to think of that walk in the woods while you’re going on this one. 

And, as for my assumption that this is for and about one person, well. Think about it. He said that he writes his songs for a single listener. I’m not saying it’s the same listener each time, let’s get that right, but it is always just for one person. With that, and with the assumption that he’s been involved in the writing of this story, I’d say that the same rule applies. He went with someone to Japan and Jamaica (J^2 haha). And, if I had to guess, it was the same person. 

Why, you ask? Well, for one, if that weren’t the case, then this poem would no longer be for one listener, it would be for multiple. And, for another, imagine how awkward it would be to listen to it with his current partner and have to explain “oh, yeah that was the super romantic vacation I took with someone else” . And, I suppose that because I think that attitude of “refocusing” and “dovetailing” and “tuning” and getting excited about imagining all of the tomorrows with your partner speaks to a long term relationship breathing easily, you know? 

I’m also going to argue that describing the aura around the house as “golden” was intentional, especially when paired with the location - in the middle of a field of sunflowers. Those are both direct references to his songs. And those two songs are particularly linked by the number 28. The third song that features 28 is Fine Line the song, but that’s a different story. Anywho! “Golden”’s bridge just repeats the word ‘golden’ twenty eight times (if you go here , you can count the bridge) and “Sunflower Vol. 6″ ends the song with 28 “boops” (believe me, I wish I was making this up. I’m not.). So then, once again, you’ve linked a story to two already linked songs. 

And, even if you don’t buy the intentional repetition, they’re linked another way, aren’t they? The color scheme and the sun symbol. Sunflowers were named because of their sun-like appearance. They turn to face it. They symbolize loyalty and adoration. And then, of course, the sun is - say it with me - golden. And it - like the person in golden - waits in the sky, beautiful and dangerous and constant. And here that symbol is, in a farmhouse in the middle of nowhere. At home. 

This whole story feels like you’re taking the time to find that heartbeat that you think you might have lost, and sort of coming back to a space where you understand that this is what you want, now and forever. It feels like finding a home that could be yours forever, and it feels like walking through some of the moments that remind him of that. 

It really is rather lovely, if you think about it, especially since he has a tendency to attribute “home” to people rather than place, in his songs. So it’s like. Going all around the world and always being at home. 

[dragoneggos]

my top 10 books of 2021

i read 90 books this year, and wanted to do a quick little top 10 of the books i’ve read- in no real order, because i can’t decide things like that and i love them all

10. ACOTAR

i know how a lot of people (rightfully) feel about this series, but after the biggest slump ever last year, this series got me out of it. i loved the vibes of it, and it all makes me very nostalgic for lockdown this year, and january. (if i had to pick one from the series, i’d probably have to say A Court of Mist and Fury.)

9. Red White & Royal Blue

i OBSESSED over this book and i stg i still think about it everyday. i love love love the fanfic feel of it, and i love how silly and fluffy and lovely the whole thing is (still secretly hoping for a sequel)

8. Percy Jackson & the Olympians

i can’t believe i only read these THIS YEAR because I LOVED THEM. i did enjoy Heroes of Olympus as well, but for me the original series really does shine, with the first person pov and the slow burn and just everything (if i had to pick one, weirdly i think i’ll go with Sea of Monsters, which isn’t even the one i rated the highest, but the one i think has the best vibes.)

7. The Song of Achilles

everyone says it, but i still haven’t emotionally recovered from this book. i dont think i ever will

6. Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe

i read both this year (and maybe secretly preferred the second one slightly) and i adore them. they are top favourites for me, and the writing style is what truly sells it for me- fucking living art.

5. Defy the Night

for me, this was everything ya fantasy should be. a dark retelling, morally grey love interests, enemies-to-lovers/friends-to-lovers. i cannot stop recommending it and i am so hyped for the rest of the series.

4. Daughter of the Moon Goddess

this technically comes out next month but i was lucky enough to be sent an arc on netgalley and god it hasnt left my brain since. i dont think i can sum up in words how truly gorgeous this book is, i can only urge you please to read it, as i did not regret one single moment of it.

3. Clarice Bean: Think Like an Elf

this is a bit of a silly one, but this series shaped me growing up, and i’m eternally grateful lauren child decided to bring it back this year for the best nostalgia kick ever.

2. The Foxhole Court

specifically, The Raven King. when i tell you this is the only thought in my head since october i am not even exaggerating. no thoughts, head exy. i have read so much aftg fic pls

1. Any Way the Wind Blows

obviously. this was always gonna be my number one. literally surpassed all my expectations and then some. thank you thank you thank you rainbow

[jolinarjackson]

Hey! Do you have any irondad fic recs? I just started reading Peter and Tony fics again and I would love any recs you have!

Hello!

Yes, I do! :D It's by no means complete because I am still busy compiling, but I have quite a few already.

For all the below stories, please heed the tags and warnings on AO3. And of course, feel also free to check out my stories. :)

My AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JolinarJackson/works

The below fics are not compiled in any particular order.

If I Die Young by MusicalLuna

Summary: Tony and Steve are trying to keep their little boy (who's not so little anymore) out of the superhero business for as long as possible, but when a kid's as stubborn as Peter is, they can't always stop him.

And sometimes things go wrong. Really, really wrong.

Categories: Superfamily, Not MCU!Peter Parker

Comment: This is a wonderful whump story that I go back to again and again.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/423790

-----

Lightning in a Bottle by Gruoch

Summary: Peter takes the tablet and looks down at the screen, where a picture of Spider-Man intimately entangled in a passionate embrace with Johnny Storm is displayed across the majority of the Daily Bugle’s home page. TORCH CAUGHT IN SPIDER-MAN’S WEB, the headline reads, bracketed by spider and flame emojis. Peter looks back up at Tony, who is still staring at him completely stone-faced.

Tony reaches across the island and taps the screen. “So. What do you have to say about that?”

“Well. For one, I’m a little disappointed with the headline,” Peter offers.

Tony lets his chin drop against his chest, momentarily defeated, before taking a deep breath and once more skewering Peter with a hard look. “You could have at least given me some warning that the two of you are...I mean, I had my suspicions, but—”

“You’re misconstruing the situation. Spider-Man and the Torch are dating,” Peter explains. “Johnny and I are just friends.”

“Boy, you’re really leaning hard into this whole alter ego thing, aren’t you?” Tony deadpans. “How’s that working out for you?”

Categories: Irondad, SpideyTorch

Comment: I love stories taking advantage of the havoc that secret superhero identities can wreak on romantic relationships. The best about this particular story is the witty writing, which makes Peter being a chaotic mess in this even better.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23413219

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The doubts that complicate by @frostysunflowers

Summary: "But he’s smart!" May had blurted, looking up at the teacher with misplaced anger. "I don’t...how does this make sense?"

She was worried, unaware, unprepared, not like Peter who had known for a while that some things were trickier for him than other kids. All the rules hidden in cheerful little rhymes and singing songs about which letters get along and those who don’t play nice; all the robotic reciting of the alphabet nearly every day: none of it had ever truly helped Peter understand how it all worked.

A brand new door opened in his life that day. On the front of it, the word ‘DYSLEXIC’ was printed in bold, the certainty of what it meant holding the letters permanently in place.

or

Nobody ever said being smart was easy.

Categories: Irondad

Comment: This is a wonderful read. @frostysunflowers manages to describe dyslexia in a way that makes the struggle understandable. The relationship between Tony and Peter is heart-warming. This is a great read if you're in the mood for something that is not too long and still want a good dosage of H/C.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23989531

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Accepting the Tides by Emma_Anacortes

Summary: Tony had dragged Peter from the depths of despair after May's death. It was normal that he'd grown to care a little about him, right?

Yeah, okay. He freaking loved the kid.

So naturally he would feel a little weird when Richard Parker randomly shows up in Peter's life. Naturally he'd feel protective, nervous, and confused because where has Richard been all this time? And why does Tony feel sick every time he sees him around Peter?

All he knows is if Richard hurts his kid, Tony's gonna give him hell.

Categories: Irondad, Steve & Peter

Comment: This story is intense, no doubt about it. Please heed all the warnings and tags carefully. However, if you give it a try, it's so worth it. This story presents a different backstory to the relationship of Peter and his parents (especially his father) while exploring Peter and Tony forging a father/son-bond in the wake of May's death. I have to say that the the relationship between Peter and Steve in this story is just as prominent and amazingly written. I loved every second of it.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11885844/chapters/26843274

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with arms wide open by @parkrstark

Summary: Tony and Pepper are expecting a baby and Peter may be the one most excited...just maybe…

Categories: Irondad, Pepperony

Comment: This is undeniably cute and heart-warming: Tony and Pepper get pregnant and Peter is right there with them, freaking out. Peter spends this story preparing to become a big brother while still being unsure about whether this is the role he is going to fulfill in the baby's life. This stoy focsses on the found family that is Tony, Pepper and Peter, but there are wonderful interactions with May, Rhodey and Happy as well.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14540409

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the stars the moon they have all been blown out (you left me in the dark) by @madasthesea

Summary: It starts off with his vision fading in and out.

What kind of demon drug can make someone go blind by inhaling a single lungful? Whatever it is, Tony doubts it’s reversible. And while Peter’s no idiot, he can be idiotically optimistic. He's determined to fix what appears to be unfixable.

Categories: Irondad

Comment: This story is experienced entirely from Tony's point of view, which make the effects of the drug and his reaction to it all the more poignant. Tony's relationship to Peter is especially highlighted in this story. You can only imagine the worry and pain Peter geos through unil the very end of the story and the pay-off is worth it. I want to highlight the way that Tony's experiecne of the effects of the drug are described here, because I thought that was superb writing and put the reader righ in Tony's shoes.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15795141/chapters/36757500

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turn back the clock (and I'll try again in the morning) by @madasthesea

Summary: Peter gets stuck in a time loop. In it, he lives through some of his worst nightmares, only to wake up that morning and have no one remember. He needs Tony to help him get through.

And if that isn't bad enough, his identity is revealed over and over, every day.

Categories: Irondad

Comment: This story is just SO GOOD. Not only is Peter experiencing the same day over and over again and his identity is revealed, but the way it happens also gets more and more taxing and gruesome. This story has emotional highpoints that are written fantastically and the Irondad in this is just heart-warming.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18023177/chapters/42585071

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How The Mighty Fall by Meep_Morp

Summary: Since his duel against Toomes on Coney Island, Peter's life has settled down considerably. May knows about his double life and accepts it (mostly). Tony has welcomed him back, and given him more independence as New York's Spider-Man.

One night during patrol he crosses paths with Connor, a teenager who has Extremis in his blood and answers to the wrong kind of people. Though Tony is quick to distrust him, Peter finds himself reluctant to follow his mentor's lead, and a bond develops between the two boys. Their relationship is further complicated when Connor's former master, Negative, makes it a personal mission to destroy them both in his quest for power.

Taking down a superpowered psychopath? Tough, but Peter isn't going to back down.

Stopping Tony from blasting his first potential boyfriend into space? He might need a miracle for that.

Categories: Irondad

Comment: This story is so intricately plotted and just a joy to read. The characters are written to perfection and this includes an absolutely fantastic and fleshed-out OC who, as a reader, you come to care about easily and quickly. Much more subtle is the relationship between Peter and Tony in this fic but every single scene is on-point. I have read and re-read this story several times and it is hard to put aside once you start.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18084407/chapters/42745826

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Project Pride by TheSleepingOwl

Summary: In hindsight, it should have been obvious. The signs were all there, unwittingly scattered by Peter like breadcrumbs for Tony to follow—the way he would fall into uncomfortable silence when the topic of dating came up, or become flustered whenever Tony teased him about the mysterious Michelle-Call-Me-MJ character Peter was constantly gushing about, or deflect Tony’s mostly-joking inquiries into whether or not they needed to be having The Talk with a hurricane of splutters and blushes.

And even without the signs, Peter was still his kid. Tony was just supposed to know these things.

So when FRIDAY pulled up Peter’s search history—‘how can i make myself not like boys,’ ‘can you force yourself to be attracted to girls,’ ‘how to stop your friends from knowing youre gay,’ and, most devastating, ‘how can i keep my parents from finding out im gay’—Tony wasn’t surprised so much as deeply, unquantifiably ashamed. Because he should have known.

Categories: Irondad

Comment: This story is an incredibly written POV of Tony coming to terms with Peter's sexuality. It's achingly realistic in the way Tony struggles to connect to Peter, knowing that he's gay. Additionally, this story has a hefty doese of Hurt/Comfort thrown in that hurts when reading it. This is a gem.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22135138/chapters/52834021

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Birds Eating Other Birds by aloneintherain

Summary: Peter wishes he hadn’t gotten out of bed that morning. Then, maybe, he wouldn’t be reduced to this - limp-crawling through the rabbit burrows that is Oscorp Tower, a monster of a man on his heels, bloody and bruised and choking on a panic attack.

Categories: Irondad, not MCU!Peter Parker

Comment: I love aloneintherain's stories. I read them when I first got into Avengers fanfic and the way they write dynamics is great. This one is intense and the way it's written sucks you right into it. Norman Osborn is so evil and creepy in this one. Part one is mainly hurt, but stick around for the comfort in part 2!

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7626433

----- And here are some Avengers team dynamic fics as well -----

It Was Probably The Pudding by Serendipity_Cometh

Summary: Given that over the course of the past eleven months Peter Parker hasn't contracted so much as a head-cold, the teenager thought it safe to assume that the whole 'irradiated spider bite' gig had equipped him with an immune system of steel that rivalled Captain America's.

So when he wakes up one night in the midst of the worst asthma attack he's suffered in almost eight years, neither he nor the rest of the team can think of a logical explanation.

And everything sort of goes downhill from there.

Categories: Team, Stony, Clint/Phil, not MCU!Peter Parker

Comment: When I started out reading Avengers fanfictions, I stumbled across this one and go back to it on a regular basis. Lots of whump and great team dynamics.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/953538/chapters/1865305

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In the Home by aloneintherain

Summary: The Avengers have been infected, turned violent and aggressive against their will. And Peter, the only one unaffected, is trapped inside the Tower with six feral teammates.

“Natasha,” Peter says cautiously, “what happened here? Steve attacked me, and if there was ever a sign that something was wrong, it’s having the embodiment of Truth, Justice, and the American Way throw you across the room -”

Natasha comes closer, her stride controlled. Nothing necessarily out of the ordinary, but there’s something in her face, in her eyes -

Natasha lunges across the space, and slams into Peter, hard.

Categories: Team, not MCU!Peter Parker

Comment: One of my very early reads when I started out in the Avengers fandom. Excellent whump, hurt/comfort and team dynamics.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5388563/chapters/12446069

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Fitting In (Tiny Spaces) by aloneintherain

Summary: Peter's trapped beneath a collapsed building during a mission, hurt and unable to move. Luckily, his comm still works. Unluckily, the Avengers don’t realise how bad of a state Peter is in, and Peter isn’t inclined to tell them.

“Spidey, they’ve got reinforcements. We’ve hit a bit of a snag here, and I don’t think anyone will be able to help you for a while. Think you can sit tight while we deal with this?”

The pressure on his lower back and legs was becoming too much. Peter swallowed thickly, fighting down panic. He could handle this.

“Yeah,” Peter said. “I can do that.”

Categories: Team, not MCU!Peter Parker

Comment: There are so many "Peter trapped under a building"-stories out there but this is the one I read first and it stuck with me. Loved the team dynamic in this.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4232937

[gameofdrarry]

Wizards Hearts Smut Recs: First Time

Wizards Hearts was a four-month-long Drarry reading fest. Players were given a playing deck of 52 tropes, and were asked to find 52 different fics to read and comment on to fill their decks. To prevent the same few fics from being read, fics were restricted to only being used for the game three times before being considered ineligible for further points. The tropes and submissions list can be found here. Players could opt in to an additional suit of 13 cards, all themed around various popular smut tropes.

Check out the masterlist of fics for this trope below the cut!

📜 Another Heart Whispers Back by slytherco Rated:  Explicit Words:  53,693 Tags:  Friends to Lovers, Auror Harry Potter, Potioneer Draco Malfoy, Pining Draco Malfoy, Oblivious Harry Potter, Virgin Harry Potter, Unrequited But Not Actually Unrequited Love, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Casual Intimacy, Humor, Comedy, Blind Date, First Dates, Bets & Wagers, Meddling, Love Confessions, Idiots in Love, Making Out, First Time, First Time Blow Jobs, Rimming, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Post-Coital Cudding, Shower Sex, Tattooed Harry Potter, Magical Tattoos, Taste of Smut 2020 Summary:  At twenty-five, Harry Potter is still a virgin and sorely lacking in options to change that state anytime soon. To help him find a plus one for Ron and Hermione’s wedding, and maybe kill two birds with one stone, Harry’s friends set him up on a series of blind dates. The only problem is, there’s something not quite right with each of their candidates. “Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.” ― Plato In which Harry learns that some things are worth waiting for, that looking and seeing are two very different things, and that his heart’s song has been heard a long time ago. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The Heart's Honest Truth by bixgirl1 & carpemermaid Rated:  Explicit Words:  16,020 Tags:  Hogwarts Eighth Year, Awkward First Times, Truth Spells, Alternating POV, Magical Accidents, Getting Together, Magical Theory, 2017 Draco's Merry-Making Mini Fest See work for more tags Summary:  "Don't you think I would have gone to Pomfrey if I thought she could help me?" "Then what can I do?" "I nee--" Malfoy broke off with a soft grunt and a pained expression. He took a shaky breath and tried again, his voice wobbling. "Will you touch me, Potter?" Draco is cursed to speak in questions. Well...Spelled, thanks to the stupidly improper archival practices of the fourth century. Harry Potter is there to save the day, but Draco isn't going to give in to his help so easily. Fortunately, the method of saving might be more satisfactory than Draco expected this time. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 When All Your Dreams Come True by Drarrelie Rated:  Explicit Words:  9448 Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Hogwarts Eighth Year, PWP, Porn with Feelings, Threesome - M/M/M, dubcon, Mistaken Identity, Pining, secret crushes, Plot Twist, virgins, Birthday, Draco Malfoy's Birthday, Birthday Presents, POV Draco Malfoy, Birthday Sex, Birthday Smut, Sexual Fantasy, First Time, First Time Bottoming, First Time Topping, Don't copy to another site, Fanart Welcome, Podfic Welcome Summary:  Six weeks ago, Draco gave his friend-with-benefits a most unexpected and precious gift for his birthday. It's only fair Blaise should reciprocate if given the chance, right? ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Take a trip into my garden by Andithiel Rated:  Explicit Words:  5974 Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Porn with Feelings, Established Relationship, Smut, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, First Time Bottoming, Draco in lingerie, Bisexual Harry Potter, Rimming, Anal Sex, Really there might be too much feeling for it to count as pwp, As usual when I write, Enthusiastic Consent Summary:  Harry has only been dating Draco for about two months, but he’s already obsessed with the git. And he knows that today, Draco has something special planned, something that includes him being dressed in skimpy lingerie. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Inside Your Mind by lazywonderland Rated:  Explicit Words:  36376 Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Top Harry, Bottom Draco, Harry Potter POV, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Bullying, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, FlirtingVirgin Draco Malfoy, Loss of Virginity, First Time, Anal Sex Anal Fingering, Smut, Angst, Overstimulation, Submissive Draco, Rimming, Multiple Orgasms, Protective Goyle, very very minor d/s elements, revolving mostly around subspace, Dominant Harry, Forced Orgasm, and lavender's alive bc i said so Summary:  Goyle's taken it upon himself to act as Malfoy's personal, one-man guard and Harry can't help but feel like it's only making the bullying worse. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 By Your Hands  by GiRa Rated:  Explicit Words:  7625 Tags: Smut, Fluff and Smut, First Time, Virgin Draco Malfoy, Established Relationship, Bottom Draco Malfoy, Top Harry Potter Summary:  After being together for months, Draco wants to try going a step further with Harry. The only problem is that he actually has no idea what he's doing - but thankfully Harry is more than happy to guide him through it. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Sexplanations (Of the Horrible Sort)  by bixgirl1 Rated:  Explicit Words:  7048 Tags: Hogwarts Eighth Year, Secret Sex, Secret Relationship, Humor, Snark, Confused Relationships, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Dirty Talk, sex injuries, Semi-Public Sex, Embarrassing Situations, Bottom Draco Summary:  Harry's willing to put up with a certain amount of injury, as long as he and Malfoy can keep doing... whatever it is they're doing. Maybe. Mostly. Especially if there might be more to it than sex. Based on a tumblr headcanon. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The Gentlewizard Club by Sophie_French Rated:  Explicit Words:  28129 Tags: Pining, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Sharing a Bed, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, First Time, Humor, Explicit Sexual Content Summary:  Draco wants what Draco wants. And if he has to snuggle up to Harry to get it, well, surely, Draco can handle that. Problem is, not sure Harry can. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 You Set My Soul Alight by parkkate Rated:  Explicit Words:  54075 Tags: Post-War, Auror Partners, Case Fic, Enemies to Lovers, Mystery, Adventure, Romance, Pining, Getting Together, Sharing a Bed, Banter, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Loss of Virginity, First Time, Mildly Dubious Consent, Consent Issues, Secrets, Misunderstandings, Miscommunication, Sleep talking, Frottage, Rimming, Face-Sitting, Intergluteal Sex, Anal Sex, Switching, Blow Jobs, Fluff, Angst, references to suicidal thoughts, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, References to Depression, Mental Health Issues, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Minor Character Death, Arguing, Reconciliation, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Angst with a Happy Ending Summary:  Students are going missing at Hogwarts, but that's not the only mystery Draco is determined to solve. Something’s going on with Potter. He can deny it all he wants. Draco is going to find out what it is. Unfortunately, trying to get to the bottom of it has some unexpected consequences and if Draco isn’t careful, he’s going to jeopardise their mission. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Sincere Gratitude from the (Heart) Hand by _Melodic_ (Sae) Rated:  Explicit Words:  1325 Tags: Hand Jobs, Anal Fingering, Anal Play, First Time, POV Harry, Smut, Humor, Shameless Smut, Porn With Plot, Prostate Massage, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Hogwarts Era, Students, Pining, Sexual Tension, Sexual Content, Sexual Inexperience, Virgin Harry, Oblivious Ron, Awesome Hermione Granger, Seduction, Sneaking Around, Classroom Sex Summary:  Two weeks later and Malfoy has yet to repay his debt to Harry. Does Harry even want him to? Oh Merlin, yes he does! ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 You Are Safe (I Know) by hephaestiions Rated:  Explicit Words:  42568 Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Post-Second War with Voldemort, Hand Jobs, Voyeurism, Exile, Racism, Person of Color Harry Potter, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Past Abuse, Minor Character Death, Blood, Azkaban, Drinking, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, Hyperventilation, Dissociation, H/D Erised 2020 Summary:  Draco Malfoy is sentenced to one year of exile following his participation in the Second Wizarding War. Harry Potter tags along. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The Spoiling of Sex From Enthusiastic Ignorance by Cibee (Cibeeeee) Rated:  Explicit Words:  6087 Tags: Humor, Fluff, Mutual Piningm Friends to Lovers, Misunderstandings, First Kiss, Making Out, Loss of Virginity, Awkward First Times, Eventual Enthusiastic Fucking, Vulgar Language, Rimming, Blow Jobs, Premature Ejaculation, Post-Hogwarts, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, POV Draco Malfoy, Virgin Draco Malfoy, Flustered Harry Potter, Switch Draco Malfoy, Switch Harry Potter, Thirsty Draco Malfoy, Quidditch Player Harry Potter, Minor Pansy Parkinson/Ginny Weasley, H/D Sex Fair 2020 Summary:  Draco is going to lose his virginity, so help him god, and he's going to lose it to one Harry Potter. Why? Because of his big cock, his status as The Top Five Quidditch Players in England, and Witch Weekly's Most-Eligible Bachelor for eight years straight. At least that's what he tells himself. Too bad first times rarely go as one plans, and now Harry is looking miserable and Draco doesn’t understand why. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Lost Boys by Dahlia_Rose_83 Rated:  Explicit Words:  32278 Tags: Hogwarts Eighth Year, Party Games, Secret Relationship, Falling In Love, First Time, Smut, Clueless Harry, Insecure Draco, Helpful Luna, Oral Sex, Anal Sex,Top Draco Malfoy, Bottom Harry Potter Summary:  On his way to meet Voldemort in the forbidden forest, Harry ran into Draco, who kissed him. Now they're both back at Hogwarts for their eighth year and he doesn't really know how to act towards the blond. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Wings on Fire by CapricornBookworm Rated:  Explicit Words:  1938 Tags: Coming Out, Enemies to Lovers, Banter, Clubbing, Dancing, Semi-Public Sex, Kissing, Grinding, Blow Jobs, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Rimming, Bottom Harry Potter, Top Draco Malfoy, Morning After, Virgin Harry Potter, First Time, Wizarding Media, Idiots in Love Summary:  Harry was sick of being everyone’s angel, the 'golden boy,' the Chosen One. And if he was going to go out of favor, he was going to go out flaming. ❤️ Read on AO3