#maybe it’s time for me to be done with this app
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Anonymous asked:
Can you do a little something about Bad omens, they are playing truth or dare and maybe Noah has to take a body shot off reader that leads to more? If you feel comfortable writing about it ofc! 🤍
So, stupid tumblr app decided to be dumb again and posted this story before it was finished, so I had to pull it and redo it. Also, it strayed from the original concept and plot, because this is what came to mind when I started writing. I'm sorry!!!!! Hope yall like the fixed version. It's a lot better and a little dirty. Sorry... my mind went too far with Noah body shots 🤯
Truth or Dare
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Tag list:
@philomenie @supersquirrel1996 @foliosgirl @angelmarie89 @fadingintothegrey @thisbicc @lacy1986 @dominuslunae @shayzillaaaa @mrsnoahsebastian @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @stardustsirenmelody @romanreigns-supreme @anything-more-than-human @into-the-grey @rumoured-whispers @myownthoughts12 @sister-sebastian @missduffsblog @bngurngheart @somebodyllelse @xxkittenkissesxx @dizzylmwahh @kenjipepsi1 @blackveilomens @chey-h @disappearintothegrey @jilliemiw86 @pathion @fear-its-beauty @an0mallly @potterheadquinn @flowery-mess @bloody-spades
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The music was too loud for Noah. He had a pounding headache and was exhausted from the six week run in the U.K they’d just got back from. Day's after returning home, the band's management team insisted on throwing a welcome home party to celebrate the biggest headliner the band had done to date and a number one single. So, he was playing nice and pretending he was enjoying the party. Noah hated it and he was miserable.
"Can you at least look like you're having a good time," Matt complained walking over to meet him. "He can't help it that he has a resting bitch face, Matt. Go easy on him." Noah scowled at Jolly, who just simply smiled. "I want to go home," Noah whined, falling down onto a nearby couch. "I feel you," Folio agreed, sitting down next to him. "Why did you agree to this, shit, Matt?" Noah pouted. "Hey my hands were tied, dude. I wasn't really given an option here. Believe me, I'd rather be somewhere else," "Yeah, like held up in his house watching Grey's Anatomy," Jolly chuckled, pulling his long hair back into a bun. "Don't be hating on my show," Matt muttered, checking his phone. "Great. I've got to go meet upper management. Fuck this shit," turning around and walking away as the others just stayed back, laughing.
Folio sat his beer down on the table and removed his hat to scratch his head. "Poor Matt. He suffers so much for us." "Yeah! He'd better. We make him a lot of money," Noah stated, crossing his arms.
Nicholas came walking over the couches, munching on a banana. The other three just stared at him.
"What the hell, Ruffilo?"
Nick looked over at Jolly. "What?" he shrugged.
"Where at a high class party with caviar and shit and all you can find to put in your mouth is a banana?" Jolly criticized.
"Yeah.Caviar is gross and nothing else looks good," staring at a group of giggling girls that walked by him. Nick just shook his head.
Noah laid his head back, pinching the bridge of his nose, when another group of girls came over to them, dressed as if they were looking to get some. Jolly's eyes widened and Folio just pulled his hat down a little lower.
"Excuse me, we need some help," one of the girls asked, her words partially slurring.
Noah raised his head, slowly, instantly regretting he did.
"Sure. What do you need," he replied, reluctantly.
The girls looked at one another, whispering in the other's ear and giggling.
"It's our friend's birthday, and we're trying to get her to do body shots by playing Truth or Dare, but she's refusing. So, we thought that if we could find some really hot guys, she'd change her mind."
Noah looked over at Jolly, begging him with his eyes to come help. Jolly just hid his grin and shook his head, no.
"I, uh, I don't think I'm qualified," "Do you have chest hair or anything around your belly button area?" one of the girls asked. "What! That’s random." "Lift your shirt up. Let me see," one of the girls ordered.
"No!" "Noah, stop being a pansy and just show the girl your chest. It won't kill you," Jolly blurted out, earning him a heated scowl from Noah. "Will you leave me alone if I do?" Noah fumed at the girl who was about to cause him to snap. "I don't know yet. Show me and I'll tell you."
Noah sighed heavily, lifting his shirt.
"I can't see. You have to lift it higher."
Noah growled, glaring over at Jolly who was fighting his laughter.
"You're dead, Karlsson," Noah threatened.
Noah lifted a little higher, hating that he was degrading himself this way.
"You're perfect! Come with me," she ordered, grabbing Noah's hand and yanking him off the couch. She and her friend drug Noah behind them as he tried to fight the grip they had on him.
"Hey you two have let me go, like right now!" Noah demanded.
They led him to another part of the venue and into a room filled with more people and louder music that was about half the size as the one they'd just come from
When his eyes landed on her, Noah almost couldn't breathe. She was so damn pretty and had a smile that could soften even the hardest heart. She was wearing a cowboy hat and a sash that read "Birthday Girl," and the moment she turned and looked at him was the moment his life changed forever.
"We found one," the two girls that drug him over told her.
The girl looked from her friends around the table to Noah, obviously very confused.
"What are you talking about? Found one what?"
She shyly looked over at Noah and smiled.
"A fucking hot guy with tattoos that you can take your first body shot off of the next time you spin a dare."
The girl groaned and threw her hands over her face.
"No! Oh god, please tell me you didn't just go out there and hunt down some random guy to bring over here to play a stupid high school game!"
The two girls were about to protest, but Noah beat them to it.
"No! Actually, I wanted to come. They said it was your birthday, so I thought I'd come over and hang for a little bit."
The girls grew quiet, laughing amongst themselves.
"I'm Noah," he introduced himself, leaning in a lot closer than he meant to. He could smell her skin, the scent of rainwater bamboo engulfing his senses.
"Y/N," she replied. Noah smiled, and all Y/N could think was, "Oh shit."
Noah was hot. His lean frame, covered by a white hoodie, towered over her. She would’ve given anything to touch his body, to dig her nails into his flesh and grip the arms that would hold her down, and run her fingers through his short, anime style haircut. Looking down at his hands, Y/N noticed how big they were and the tattoos that were drawn over his skin. Telling from the ones on his neck, she assumed he had them in many other places too.
"Are you okay?"
Noah's deep voice pulled Y/N from her thoughts. She smiled, nodding her head.
"I'm fine, sorry."
Noah gave a gentle laugh.
"So, Truth or Dare and body shots, huh?"
Y/N groaned. "Shit. Please ignore my stupid friends, okay. I don't know what possessed them,"
"I think your friends are just trying to help you have a good birthday," Noah interrupted, trying to sound positive in hopes of getting what he was secretly yearning for.
Y/N raised an eyebrow
"Someone's being optimistic." "You don't think so?" "No," Y/N shook her head, looking over at the girls who had just taken shots of something. "They always have hidden motives."
Noah reached over and brushed her fingers with the tips of his, hoping to pull that beautiful smile out of her again. This behavior was totally out of character for him. Noah never allowed his feelings for someone he'd just met to affect him the way he was allowing them to right now, and it was only a matter of time before the girl in front of him said or did the wrong or right thing that would make him snap.
Y/N shivered the moment she turned and faced Noah. The heat that spilled from his gaze was enough for her to feel internally, forcing her to clench the muscles of her sex as her arousal soaked her panties.
"Hidden motives are a dangerous game to play," Noah pointed out, unable to look away from the heated look in Y/N's eyes that was causing his dick to harden the longer he continued staring. "It's better to just be truthfully honest and up front, if you don’t, don't you think?"
Y/N swallowed hard, a small smile twitching her lips.
"I do."
The tension between them was thick and sweet, like honey. They way she peered up at Noah through her lashes shot through him like a bullet headed straight for his semi-hard length.
"Hey! Are you playing?"
Noah and Y/N looked over at the table where a group of her friends were crowded, the one yelling at them holding an empty beer bottle. Y/N hesitated before looking at Noah.
"You really don't have to do this. I know this isn't the ideal situation for you, and you have no idea who any of these people are."
"I'll do it." "Really?" Y/N asked, surprised.
"Yeah. It's your birthday, and anything here has to be better than what I was having to suffer through over there,” flicking his head in the direction where he came from.
Y/N gave Noah a small smile. "Okay, well, if you're sure." "I'm sure," Noah replied, giving Y/N a tight-lipped smile.
This group of friends was nothing like Noah's group of friends. He gave up drinking and the party life years ago, trading it in for video games, movies and anime nights with his friends. This wasn't his scene, and he was starting to believe it wasn't hers either. They watched the bottle spin over and over, going through four people before it was finally Y/N's turn. Praying hard for a miracle that it wouldn't land on a dare, she was severely disappointed when it did. But with only one look at Noah, her perspective changed quickly. Noah wasn't surprised when her friends dared her to take body shots off of him. It was the reason for the grin on his face. The first one that happened was awkward for him to do with everyone watching, but he kept his eyes on Y/N, doing his best to block everyone else out. Standing in front of her, wondering if their night together was really over that quickly, Noah acted on impulse and closed the slight gap between the two of them. Lifting Y/N's chin, his eyes darted between hers and he saw the very thing he was looking for flash across them.
"I can't believe you're letting me do this again," Y/N grinned, watching Noah remove his hoodie this time. "It's your birthday, Pretty Girl. Birthday girls always get what they want,” Noah stated, lying back on the two tables that had been pulled together.
With a bottle of tequila in one hand and a dish of limes in the other, Y/N sat them down on the table next to the salt. Noah kept his eyes locked on her, watching every expression her face made. Taking a risk, he reached over, underneath her mini skirt, and slid his hand between her things hearing the small, slight gasp that quickly turned into a whimper. Noah raised an eyebrow, clenching his jaw as his huge hand grasped the inside of her thigh tighter before moving a little further up. Y/N didn't stop him, but instead, moved closer to keep their moment more discreet.
"Your thighs are so fucking soft and warm," Noah praised. His big soft hand with their long fingers slowly ran up and down her skin, making her shiver. “I wonder what would happen if I did this,” brushing fingertips over her throbbing hearted sex.
The slight buck of her hips gave Noah the response he wanted. His infectious smile returned to his lips, making Y/N hungry to taste them.
"You're playing dangerously, Noah," Y/N warned.
"I asked you if you wanted to," he replied, lifting his shirt high enough for her to take her first shot. “So, are you?”
Y/N opened the tequila and slowly poured it into Noah's belly button, being as careful as she could be. Noah's stomach muscles flinched causing his skin to prickle and she wondered if it would have the same response if she were to go down on him right then. She wanted to find out, especially when she noticed how hard he was. It took a lot of restraint to not touch him
"See something you like?"
"I see a lot that I like," she grinned, taking a lime slice from the bowl and bringing it to Noah's lips.
His hand remained between her thighs, as he continued caressing her skin, slowly, giving Y/N a pleasured feeling that set her nerves on fire. She parted her legs a little more, giving Noah more access to her sweet spot.
"Open," she ordered and Noah obeyed, biting down gently on the green rind. Pushing his head to the side, Y/N poured the salt onto his painted skin and ran her tongue over it, over the faded green leaves that rested just below his jaw. It pulled a deep throated growl from Noah and clenched the inside of her thigh. Y/N moaned from the feeling, knowing fully well there would be a bruise there by morning. Quickly, with the salt still on her tongue, she moved to Noah's lower half, sucking the liquor straight from his navel until every bit of it was gone before moving to his mouth and taking the lime. Noah watched with lust filled eyes as she sucked the juice from the rind, tossing the table when she was finished.
"What?" Y/N asked, noticing the look on his face as she returned to her normal height. "Shit," Noah breathed, half-smiling. "I think that had to be one of the hottest things I've ever seen."
Y/N giggled.
"Well, it sounds like you haven't seen a lot." "Oh, I've seen plenty."
Noah moved his hand higher up her thigh, waiting for her to stop him, and when she didn't, he ran his fingers over her pussy.
"Your panties are moist, pretty girl. Do I make you wet?"
Y/N whimpered, biting her lower lip.
"What if I did this?" swiping over her clit. "Noah," she gasped, gripping the table.
Noah laughed, soft and low.
He sat up, throwing his legs over the side of the table, and pushed her panties to the side, pressing the pad of his finger lightly between her folds. He made a sound that was almost inhuman, swallowed up by the newfound warmth he'd discovered. His fingers rubbed gently at first, pulling tiny gasps from her lips as his tongue and teeth marked faint lines across her skin as he made his way towards the bottom of her throat.
"Damn, you're so fucking wet; so tight. God, baby. You're sweet little pussy feels so good," Noah muttered.
Y/N could hear the excitement and the tiny crack that followed in his voice. She sighed, closing her eyes and absorbing the feeling of Noah's sensual assaults inside her. She didn't care if this was wrong. She didn't care if people could see. All she cared about was if Noah was capable of making her cum.
Moaning the moment Noah slid two fingers up inside her, Y/N raised her head, looking up at him. Noah was gone, lost in the moment just as much as she was. He hummed, satisfied with the feeling of her tight pussy already clenching around his fingers that thrusted deeper and deeper each time feeding the array of quiet moans that escaped her lips the harder she worked herself against his hand.
"I want you to take another shot off me," Noah ordered.
"Mmm, I can't, not while your fucking me like this," Y/N protested, keeping her eyes locked on him.
"Yes you can. Just try it. You'll like it, I promise," Noah grinned.
Y/N's stomach fluttered as her heart beat faster. Doing what she was told, she salted his neck and instead of putting the tequila in his navel, she poured it into the small spot between the two bones at the bottom of his throat, right below his adam's apple. Noah slowed his movements as Y/N rose to the tips of her toes, licked the salt and lapped up the liquor, grabbing the lime from Noah's teeth.
"Fuck that's hot," he confessed, kissing her forehead. He could feel her legs trembling, her body starting to shake and even though she was making being a gentleman about the whole thing difficult, he refused to be apathetic.
"Come here," he whispered gently, returning to the soft thrusting of his fingers against her inner walls, taking his time to completely undo every tensed muscle in her body.
Y/N scooted closer, lifting on her toes to give more access and placing her hands on Noah's thighs for balance.He pulled her in and pushed her head down, allowing her to rest her forehead against his shoulder.
"Stay with me, baby. Keep your hands on me. I've got you," Noah encouraged her, wrapping his free arm around her and holding her as close as he could. Y/N gasped and moaned, clawing at the fabric beneath her hands as Noah took them to another dimension. They were no longer where they had been. They were somewhere else; just the two of them.
"Oh, god!" "God isn't here, pretty girl, I am. And it damn well better my name on those lips when you cum," Noah growled
He held Y/N to him with one arm while using his free hand to thrust up into her. Her back arched, and she allowed her head to fall back as Noah latched on to her throat. He bit down, sucking the saltiness of her skin off .
"Noah, this is dangerous. What if someone sees," Y/N panicked, making a poor attempt at getting out of Noah's grasps. "I don't fucking care if they do. I just want you, I need you to cum for me, baby. Give me the satisfaction of pushing you over the edge."
Y/N couldn't deny the hungry desire for her she saw in Noah's eyes. It was feral, and all she wanted to do was feed it. Pushing her hips forward, she gripped Noah's shoulders and worked her pussy against his hand, right before he slipped in a third finger. A low curse left her lips as she bit the lower one to cover a moan.
"You're going to cum for me, aren't you, pretty girl?"
Her pussy clenched around his fingers and soft whimpers replaced any words she wanted to say.
"God damn, yeah, that's, baby, ride my hand," Noah coaxed her, paying close attention to Y/N's body and the signs it was giving him. "You like that, don't you? You like me fucking your wet, needy cunt with my fingers like this, twisting them inside you. Tell me you do," he breathed, trying to ease the urgent need to cum himself "I do! Fuck, Noah, I shouldn't, but I do really like it."
Her abdomen was on fire, her head spinning from the overwhelming coiled tension building in her lower back. Her breathing was shallow as her quiet moans started to draw closer together, and her head fell back, closing her eyes. Noah wrapped his hand around the back of her neck, lifting her head.
"Eyes on my pretty girl. Watch me when you cum. I need to see the look in your eyes when you cum all over my hand," he ordered, breathing heavily.Y/N nodded "I can feel you squeezing my fingers," he whispered, ghosting his lips over hers. Y/N tilted her head in hopes of capturing them, but failed. "Noah, I'm about to cum!" she gasped once Noah found that spot."Right there?" "Mmm-hmm, don't stop, please don't stop!" "I won't as long as you keep your eyes on me," he promised. And she did.
Pressure built in Y/N's lower half, the ache strengthening with every thrust of Noah's fingers or the swipe of his thumb over her clit and in a matter of seconds her walls fluttered around his fingers, her climax reached its peak, and her orgasm crescendo throughout her entire body.
"Oh god, Noah," she cried into her hand before she collapsed onto his chest.
"There it is, that's a good girl. I can feel your cum dripping down my wrist, baby. Fuck!"
"What's wrong?"
Noah took a deep breath through his nose, trying to keep it together.
"I'm about to fucking cum!" he growled through gritted teeth.
Y/N wasted no time. Grabbing the front of Noah's pants and briefs, she pulled as Noah lifted his bottom and released enough of his thick, swollen cock right as the milky white liquid shot all down the front of her skirt. Noah groaned, resting his forehead against hers.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck! "I'm so fucking sorry, Y/N," he swore over and over, chest rising and falling rapidly as he covered himself up, but Y/N was only laughing quietly.
"Don't be,' she replied breathlessly, looking into Noah's eyes. She pulled back and brushed the hair out of his eyes before kissing his forehead."We both got what we wanted."
Noah grinned. Reaching over, he grabbed the tequila, salt, and limes.
"What are you doing?" "It's my turn. Lay your head back," he commanded, and Y/N obeyed, feeling as if her heart was about to beat out of her chest.
Noah repeated the same steps as she did when taking the shot off of his neck and swallowed quickly, trailing his lips with a little bit of tongue up her neck, kissing as he went over her jawline and took the lime from her mouth. Y/N could only give small exasperated moans as her eyes met Noah's. They were dark, full of an eagerness for more.
"Yum," he smirked, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Happy Birthday, pretty girl." Y/N just shook her head, smiling.
They found a bathroom where Noah was able to clean his happy accident off the front of Y/N's mini skirt. Neither one spoke, both of them either too embarrassed, ashamed, or sad from everything that had happened or was about to. Maybe it was all three. Walking around the corner of the bathrooms, Noah's phone vibrated. It was a text in the band's group chat asking where he was. He texted back that he was coming, then pocketed his phone.
"So, uh, thanks for the really awesome birthday gifts," Y/N teased.
Noah felt his ears and cheeks instantly heat up, forcing him to rub the back of his neck like he normally did when he got embarrassed.
"Yeah," he laughed, dropping his gaze to the floor.
"Seriously," reaching out and touching Noah’s arm, assuring him she was.
Noah locked eyes with Y/N, desperately aching to kiss her. She was so pretty, with a sweet smile and the kind of laugh he could get used to hearing a lot of. But deep down, he knew that wasn't going to happen
"I gotta go. Gotta get back to my friends..."
"Yeah," Y/N laughed nervously, "of course."
"Do, uh, is there any chance I could have your number?"
There was an awkward silence.
"Um, Noah, I,”
"Oh god, I'm sorry, you're don't, er, you're not, shit, never mind," Noah stuttered, apologizing quickly.
"No, no, it's not like that, it's not that I don't want to, it's just that, well, I just shouldn't," Y/N stated, peering up at him.
That's Noah realized, that was Y/N's way of letting him down gently. His pocket vibrated, saving his heart from realizing what his head had just figured out. Matt was freaking out. He really had to go, now.
"Right," he slowly nodded, suddenly feeling like the biggest fool around. "I'm gonna go. My band's about to receive some kind of an award, so I've got to hurry."
"Your band? Wait… what?"
"Yeah, anyway, it was really nice to meet you and I hope the rest of your birthday is great," he yelled, turning around and running in the opposite direction as Y/N called his name from behind him.
"Dude, where the fuck have you been?" Matt scolded.
"It's a long story. I'll tell you later."
"Hey," Jolly called, tapping Noah on the shoulder. "How did it go? Was the friend nice?"
Noah remained silent for a moment, wondering how to put into words all that had happened. There weren't enough and there never would be.
"Yeah," was all he could say with a smile. "She was pretty nice. It was fun, for the moment," shrugging his shoulders.
Jolly chuckled, patting his friend on the back as they followed Nick and Folio out to where their managers were standing. The guests cheered and whistled, cameras flashed, and hands were shaken as the guys were awarded and congratulated with a number one single award from one of the biggest music companies in the country. Noah looked out into the faces of all those cheering for him and his best friends, eyes stopping when they came in contact with a pair he recognized instantly.
Y/N's mouth was wide open as she stood in the crowd looking at the man whom she had just shared a very intimate moment with and nobody but the two of them knew. She was with somebody, making Noah's heart instantly fall into the pit of his stomach. He'd just fingerfucked some other guy's girl, making him feel low and dirty. The guy turned around, and Noah recognized him instantly. He was a friend in the business who worked for the record label. The guy looked from him to Y/N, and Noah watched as he gently shook her to get her attention. Reluctantly, Y/N tore her eyes away from Noah and exchanged a few words with the guy glancing at him one more time, before walking off with her face in her hands. His friend shrugged, waving to Noah, before turning to follow after Y/N. Noah smiled softly to himself, knowing it wasn't going to be the last he’d ever see her again.
#noah sebastian#noahsebastian#noah sebastian fanfic#noah sebastian fanfiction#noah sebastian x reader#noah sebastian one shot#bad omens cult#bad omens band#bad omens#bad omens fanfiction
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Bones - Part 18 [Mack x David]
A/N: I love so much about this, but the way the opening part of this one lives rent free in my head at all times, since I wrote it. Mack, get it girl 👏🏻 I want all that David is packing in this one.
Word Count: 4.6k
June
Outside the window in front of her, Mack watches as her husband rolls back up to the barn with his truck. A cold mist drizzles down from the sky, coating everything in dampness. The dirt is mud beneath his boots as he starts to unload posts and extra fencing from the back of his truck. He wears his worn leather work gloves to protect his hands. A local mechanic shop’s hoodie is on his big upper body. His hood is up, cover his black hair from the rainy morning.
Mack takes another long sip of her coffee, tilting her head to the side. She takes in his full ass in his blue, Carhartt jeans. The bulge from his can of tobacco has worn a white circle into the denim on his left side. His muscles scrunch and bulge as he gathers the remaining materials in his hands before disappearing into the barn.
Farmer David has her heart and mind this morning.
The coffee pot beeps beside of her and hisses out hot steam as it ends a brewing cycle. Mack grabs David’s thermos, pouring in the black liquid to prepare to bring it to him. He snuck out this morning while she was still sleeping, but she is dying to have coffee with him on this rainy, cold Saturday.
With the thermos in hand, Mack heads over to the closet, getting out her leather boots so her socks stay dry from the rain. She skips a rain jacket, instead grabbing a Rangers hoodie, and tossing it over her shoulders. On her head, she places a Budweiser hat David got her as a joke. She double checks Nicky is still sleeping on her monitor app, then quietly exits the house. David is still hidden inside the barn. She walks in with her hands stuffed into her sweatshirt pocket, thermos pinched against her ribs.
Clanking of metal and tools sounds close to the front of the green tractor he is now working on. He’s been up for hours, fixing fence, feeding animals, and now instead of being done with the mandatory things and calling it a day, her hard working man is on to the next task. She gets closer, seeing him bent inside. His huge shoulder muscles strain against the blue fabric on them. One foot is slightly lifted off the ground, mud hanging off of it, while a worn, oil rag is tucked into his back pocket by his tobacco tin.
Mack walks to the front, setting his thermos on the work bench and taking in the view. He starts muttering to himself, grunting as he twists a tool harder around a bolt… or maybe it’s a nut. Mack doesn’t really know. But the angle and force tightens his muscles further and suddenly she has to check her lips for drool.
“That should do it.” He murmurs to himself. He puts a few fingers on it, wiggling, then tightens it a smidge more before backing out from under the hood. “Hi honey.” He says without looking over at her.
“How do you know I’m here?”
“I can smell your perfume.” He responds, not taking his eyes off the engine. “Otherwise, you would have surprised me.” He licks his lips, then does one last small twist with his tool on another bolt. “You up already eh?” He steps towards her as he wipes his hands on the towel in his back pocket. “It’s barely 7.”
“Yeah I know. And it’s a Saturday.”
He raises his eyebrows at her.
“Why does it matter that it’s the weekend?” He tosses the used towel onto the work bench, then wraps his arms around her hips. He pulls her into his chest. It’s slightly damp from the misty rain but Mack doesn’t mind. Beneath that dampness is the furnace she was missing when she awoke this morning. She runs her hands up his chest to his shoulders, anchoring herself there for a kiss. His tongue curves over her bottom lip, eating her up in a way that makes Mack spacey.
“It’s a problem that you’re out here working so hard and not in bed with me.”
“What would I be doing in there that’s better than this?” He asks cheekily.
“Working hard on something else.” Mack smirks up at him, accepting his next kiss with more enthusiasm, bringing up the heat between them.
The rain starts to pick up outside, hitting the metal roof with heavier pings. Mack looks up at the new roof David replaced with the farm hands last summer. It used to leak like crazy during storms but the new steel shields them. A soft roll of thunder sounds out and Mack grins.
“Hmm?” He asks her about her look. She hooks her hands around his neck and pulls his face down to hers.
“Tell me you’re going to make all my rom-com dreams come true right now.”
“Mrs. Mackenzie, did you come out here to get laid?”
“Yes.” He laughs, head tilted back as his stomach tightens and shoulders shake from the effort.
“I can’t stop thinking about the story you, Cody, and Felix were talking about earlier this summer. About how despite what they think, you’ve never had sex in this barn.”
Felix and Cody hadn’t been able to believe it. Apparently David and his high school girlfriend were known for sneaking off to get busy. David had been adamant it never happened.
“My dad would have whooped my ass if he caught me doing anything by his John Deere.” David had said at the time, rubbing at his mustache and smirking a little too hard.
“Yeah? What about it?”
“I think you’re a liar.” She confesses, rolling her hand down his chest to cup him over the zipper of his jeans. He protrudes stiffly as he presses his hips into her palm.
“Mmmm, I’m not lying, honey. No one in here. Ever.”
“Not even a titty grab?”
“Well…” He trails off, then brings a hand under her breast. He makes a C with his fingers, cupping the right one. His thumb strokes across the center where her nipple protrudes from the cold. “Now I have.” He whispers against her lips. His tongue plays with hers as he urges her head fully back so he can consume her mouth better.
“No head?”
David scoffs, eyes closing as if in torment.
“No, but I fucking tried. I’ll admit that.” Mack giggles, smiling broadly.
“Should I make your dreams come true?” She whispers seductively.
“I love you too much to let you get on your knees in this barn, honey.” He chuckles. He smoothes her fly away hairs back from her forehead, then looks over at the work bench. He cocks an eyebrow at her. She gives him a look of approval back. His arms fall back to her waist, scooping her up into his arms.
David brings Mack over to the work bench. To her left, he begins to clear a better spot off, then leaves the barn, murmuring that he will be back. He returns with a blanket in his hands, the one he had used to cover her when she gave birth to Nicky almost a year ago. He lays it down for a different purpose now, then he lifts her up onto it.
“I’ve always imagined this with you….” He jokes, pretending to be bashful like it really is a movie. Bashful isn’t something David can play convincingly. Instead he comes across confident in his pursuit. Mack falls a bit back onto the blanket, giggling as her hands support her weight. David unbuttons her jeans, then works them down her thighs and off her legs completely.
“Oh Farmer Davey. This night has been so special to me. Please… make love to me.” She bats her lashes at him.
“You’re better than a movie, honey.” He whispers, cupping her face. It’s so sincere, Mack actually blushes.
David steps between her open legs. Mack watches him undo his jeans, bottom lip tucked between her teeth. It’s a sight to behold. Strong fingers working at the metal enclosures. The way he tucks his thumbs into the waistband of his clothes to work them off his hips. How he widens his stance to keep them at mid thigh, then gathers his cock confidently into his hand. Mack can feel her eyes melt like chocolate. His big palm wraps around his shaft, stroking twice before he steps forward to run his swollen head through her wet folds.
“C’mere.” He murmurs, reaching for her neck. He pulls her to kiss him as he pushes in that first, tight inch. Mack gasps into his mouth, then bites down on his bottom lip as he keeps going.
“Mmm.” She moans, turning the bite into a nibble. Goosebumps cover her body, tightening her nipples beneath her shirt. Her fingers grip his neck, then thread through his hair, scratching at his scalp.
“So good, honey.” He whispers into her mouth.
His hips pump in and out slowly, working her up into a pace that they both want to be at. The coil in Mack’s core begins to tighten. She rolls her hips down into him, chasing for more until he gives it to her. The fronts of his thighs hit the work bench, jiggling tools and metal cans of nuts, nails, and screws. It’s loud and echos each of his thrusts through the barn. The rain picks up, another roll of thunder washes over the farm, and then a low, growly groan rocks from David’s chest.
“Look so pretty with my cock inside you, baby. Spread out just for me…” David tugs her closer to the edge of the work bench, switching up the angle to brush against her velvet button. Mack whimpers. David holds her hips down to stop her helping. Her head lists backwards, rolling off her shoulder so her throat is exposed for him. He brings a hand up, stroking down the thick column as it expands and shrinks from each breath into her lungs.
Mack feels electrically alive as her orgasm rocks through her. David works her through it, gritting his teeth together to save his for their next position.
“You gonna bend over for me now? Let me really give you what you came out here for, hmm?” He requests as he pulls her off the work bench.
He lets her feet drop back to the ground, then eats her up with his gaze as she turns seductively. She bucks her bare ass back into his wet cock. She leans forward, crossing her arms, then laying her cheek on them like the good girl he wants her to be. Her bottom lip rolls into her mouth again as he pushes in. Her eyelashes flutter, and a squeaky exhale falls from her parted lips.
She loves this feeling, like he’s going to fuck his way through her body. It’s so deep and intense, even when he’s going slow, letting her adjust to the new depth he is reaching. David glides an arm across her hips, leaning more forward. His chest stays connect to her back, only his hips working in and out of her. He presses all the way forward, getting as deep as he can, balls rubbing against her clit. He works his hips in a circular motion that has Mack holding her breath.
“Fuck.” She finally exhales in a gasp. “Th-that’s good. Really good.” She inhales deeply, then lets it out in a fast moan.
“Yeah? You love this cock, huh honey?” He holds her there, letting her savor it, turning her face to the side so he can devour her mouth. Then he begins to build back up into slow but powerful thrusts. He takes his time with her now, really pushing the limits of her with their bodies pressing together. One of his hands glides from her waist to her shoulder where her neck meets it. His fingers fold over towards her chest, thumb brushing at the curled hairs at the back of her neck, rubbing circles.
“Your pussy’s s’good. So wet. All for me. Got her trained so well.” He praises.
Sharp staccato breaths begin spilling from Mack. She drops her head back to her crossed arms, trying to resist the buckling her knees want to do. David can sense it, holding her tighter across her hips. The hand on her neck circles around to her throat, easing her head back to his shoulder. His grip tightens on her throat, then he pounds into her with no holding back. Mack grips his forearm, fingernails digging in as he gives her everything he’s got left. The demanding thrusts take her under fast. Her whole body spasms through her orgasm. Mack yells out his name, groaning before the intensity steals her voice completely.
“Fuck yes.” David moans spilling his load into her with four final bucks. Mack feels his cum pooling together, then dripping out of her immediately as he pulls out. His cock spasms against her ass as he gathers her in his arms to kiss her deeply over her shoulder. His mustache tickles her nose as sweet, soft pecks work their way along her entire mouth. “Mmm, this with you, anytime, honey.”
A chill moves through Mack as David steps back. He works himself back into his clothes, then grabs hers. Delicately, he threads her feet back into both items of clothing, then slides them up her legs. Mack falls back against his shoulder as he works the zipper and button back into place. Her eyes are closed, complete mush on his chest.
“My baby is tired.” He murmurs, ghosting a hand over her hair. He kisses her temple tenderly.
“Yeah. But our baby is about to wake up. Come have breakfast with us?”
“Okay.” He agrees quietly.
With both of them fully clothed again, Mack and David head out of the barn, holding hands. Felix is pulling back into the driveway, which makes Mack realize how close they were to getting caught. Like teenagers. She hides her giggle in David’s arm as Felix rolls the window down.
“Hey, you need help?”
“No I’m heading in. Might be back out later, but everything that needs to get done is done for the day.”
“Alright. See you tomorrow.” He waves then continues on to his house.
“Five minutes earlier and damn would he have had a show.”
“We can never do that again.” Mack shakes her head. David gasps as they walk up the front porch steps.
“Honey, no. You can’t give barn sex and then take it away.” He extends his hand out towards the barn. Mack shakes her head at him again. His hand drops to his thigh in a dramatic slap. Mack kisses his cheek in reassurance. He grabs the door, holding it open for her. He watches her ass as she walks into the entry way, kicking off her boots. David keeps his out on the front porch then jumps into the house to avoid his socks getting wet.
A soft cry sounds from their son’s room. David looks towards it, beaming with joy that his baby is up.
“I got him.” He tells her.
Mack goes to the kitchen to start working on breakfast for their little man. Today is a single egg, some banana and a bottle of whole milk.
“I know, I miss her too when I sleep.” She hears her husband murmur as he comes down the hall. “But then I get to see her every morning and it’s the best part of the day.”
Mack look over her shoulder, smiling at her boys. Nicky’s black hair is wild and staticky, which makes her laugh. The little boy lights up like a summer sunrise when he sees his mama. He reaches for Mack who gathers him into her chest, smooching all over his cheeks. She pays extra attention to his huge dimples.
“Good morning!!!” She coos to their happy baby. “Aren’t you just the most handsome boy in the whole world? Look at you!” She pokes his belly, making him break out into giggles. David pinches at his sides, escalating the giggles until the three of them are laughing so hard their cheeks hurt.
David’s hand glides across Mack’s shoulders, holding her close. His face turns into her hair and he kisses her.
“Thank you, honey. You made us the perfect baby.”
Mack grins.
He gives her way too much credit for that.
But he is right. Their baby is perfect.
She can’t wait to celebrate one year of him soon.
- - - & - - -
July
“Honey?” Mack hears her husband call into the house where she is at the kitchen counter. Her and her mom are just finishing cutting up a ton of fruit for Nicky’s first birthday party.
“Yeah, babe?” She calls back to him.
“Can you come look at this to make sure it’s what you’re thinking before Cody leaves to wash up?”
“Sure.” Mack wipes her hands on a hand towel, then looks at her mom. “Are you good?”
“Yes. Go.” She nods, continuing to cube the watermelon.
“I’ll help mom finish.” Lucie says as they pass each other in the doorway.
“Thank you.” Mack smiles, then heads towards her husband. He holds the door open for her as Mack slides her feet into her Birkenstocks. She steps onto the porch then gasps in excitement. “Oh my gosh! Ah!” Mack claps excitedly. “It looks so good!”
For their son’s first birthday, the theme had to be farm animals. After the barn got a fresh coat of vibrant red paint a few weeks ago, Mack knew they should have the barn as the center of the party. With that, she had an idea of getting a ton of balloons and dotting them in an arch all over the entrance of the barn. The balloons have reds, blues, and cow print patterns on them, creating a fun and festive glow. They won’t have any food inside the barn, but the gathering tables are set out in front of it while Nicky’s high chair is sitting in the shaded area by the arch.
“It looks great.” She brings her clasped hands in front of her mouth. “I’m so in love with it.”
“Good.” David smirks, squeezing her shoulder. He brushes her neck with a few thumb swipes then steps forward. “We are good, Code.”
“Thank you!” Mack yells to him. He tosses her a wave, then heads towards his truck after speaking to David briefly.
“Ooooo, that looks great!” Sophie pops her head out, inspecting the work. “Nicky is going to be so excited when he wakes up from his nap.”
“Hopefully not for another hour though.” Mack insists. Any earlier and they will have a cranky birthday boy on their hands.
In that hour, the food is stationed all throughout the kitchen, dining room and part of the living room area. With the bugs and wind, putting it outside was not an option. Instead, the porch is lined with coolers filled with drinks. People start arriving as Nicky is waking up from his nap. David goes into his room, waking him up in a quiet space and changing him into his farmer outfit.
“Look who’s up, mama.” David says as he comes into the kitchen with Nicky. He is dressed in little Oshkosh overalls and a plain white shirt. On his upper lip is the stick on mustache Connor brought last year. Mack laughs, clapping her hands and then leaning forward to smooch her husband.
“That’s cute, babe.”
“He doesn’t like the straw hat, but is okay with this one.” David rubs at the denim bucket hat on their son’s head.
“That’s okay! He looks so adorable.”
“Gimme.” Sophie demands, taking her nephew from David. “Let’s go see your party, Nicky!��
Mack and David trail after Sophie as she brings their baby around all the different stations. She ooos and awes over the food with him including the rice Krispy treats that she calls hay bales. His smash cake is also on the dessert table and he tries to reach for it.
“No, no. Not yet!” She chuckles. “We need everyone to be around for that.” Instead, Sophie gives him a bite of watermelon to gum on.
Sophie wanders outside, showing him the tables with various colored table clothes, the different games for the various kids who are coming to celebrate, and of course, the balloon arch.
“Now say thank you uncle Cody for the balloon arch!” Sophie cheers, holding up Nicky’s fist so he can fist bump. Cody does, careful of the condensation covered beer bottle in his fist.
“Anything for you, little dude.”
“Hey, does he need sunscreen?” Mack asks her husband, covering her eyes as the cloud moves past the sun.
“No, I put it on.”
“Okay.” Mack nods.
“There is nothing else to do but have fun, honey.” David says into her hair. Mack nods. He is right; it’s time to enjoy the celebration.
For the next few hours, Mack’s hands feel weirdly empty, even with the High Noon in her grasp. Everything is taken care of by her husband, her sisters, her parents, or Lorena. It’s weird to be sitting down, socializing and not up hustling after the baby or cleaning something. Weird, but not bad at all.
Mack brings the can of her drink up, rolling her eyes as her brother in law talks about her birth story like he was there.
“I feel like you don’t talk about this enough.” Connor shakes his head, opening up a juice box for Winnie. “Like that was so bad *he mouths* ass. Like… Nicky will be a legend for years to come.”
“I’m just glad I survived.” Mack chuckles, shaking her head. Although that’s actually valid and maybe not as funny as she is brushing it off to be.
“I offered to recreate the drive early this morning with her.” David says pointing to the East where they barely made it a few miles last year. Everyone laughs.
“Maybe next year.” Mack shrugs.
It would be fun to recreate that drive with her husband some day. To reflect and have appreciation for everything they did that night to safely bring their son into the world together. But it’s only been a year and the birth trauma is a little fresh for Mack still. With that in mind, she changes the subject.
“Are we ready for some cake?”
“Yes!!!!!!!!!!” Winnie yells. Mack chuckles.
“What, the five hay bales you had weren’t enough?”
“No. It’s not the same as cake. It’s just cereal and marshmallows. I could have that for breakfast.”
“True.” Mack nods. “Do you want to help me? I need a helper for plates and napkins and forks.”
“Yeah!” Winnie takes off towards the house.
“Daddy, can you help me with the big cake?” Mack asks her husband.
“Mhm.” He stands up immediately and they walk hand in hand to the porch.
Once inside, Winnie gathers up all the items from the bags on the table and hauls them outside. Mack smiles, watching Lucie help her get everything settled outside. In his grandpa’s arms, Nicky tries to reach for a balloon on the arch. Large hands come to Mack’s hips at the dessert table as she carefully picks up Nicky’s cake.
“The other cake is in the fridge.” Mack tells her husband. He doesn’t listen. Instead, he winds his hands along her stomach, pulling her back until they press together.
“I’m so in love with you, honey.” Mack whimpers and leans deeper into his chest. His arms tighten, one going across her chest to hold her shoulder. He is careful of the cake as he kisses her cheek. “Seriously. So obsessed with you and our boy.”
“I love you.” She sighs to him. He steps back, then his boots thump against the floor as he heads to grab the cake from the fridge. Together, they walk back outside. Kids of various ages run around their legs, so excited for a piece of sugar.
“I want that piece! That one!” Winnie yells, putting her fingers into it to mark it.
“Hey, hey!” Connor grabs her hand, bringing it out of the cake. “We don’t put our fingers in people’s food. Or by knives.” He holds Winnie in place while David cuts the rest of the pieces. Everyone is given a piece and then Mack brings the smash cake over to their baby.
“Are you ready?” She asks, laughing at literally everyone with their phones up.
“Y’all are more than welcome to take videos and pictures, but please help us protect our boy and keep them off social media.” David reminds everyone of their parental rule. He nods at Mack once he feels people understand how serious he is and she sets it down. David wraps an arm around her waist, smiling as Nicky carefully inspects the cake. He brings the white, butter cream frosting to his lips then starts to bounce excitedly in his high chair at the taste.
The crowd giggles and cheers as he pulls out a fist full of cake and frosting. Mack can’t help but tear up. Her bottom lip quivers between her teeth and she exhales heavily in her husband’s arms. She is so in love with that baby. What a gift it’s been the last year to be his mom and raise a baby with the love of her life.
Mack sniffs, reaching up to wipe the tears off her cheeks. She can remember everything about a year ago today. The discomfort. The contractions building quickly. The panic in her voice when she asked David if they were going to make it to the hospital. Then the way her husband came through as a real life super hero for them. He was calm, steady, unwavering as he did what had to be done. Mack squeezes his forearm in recognition, so thankful for the man she made that little boy with.
After the festivities die down, Mack and David take advantage of numerous baby sitters in the house and head out to the sunflower patch they have replanted year after year to keep their proposal site fresh. They each have a beer with them, David brings a blanket, and they curl up on the bench he made years ago now.
“I can’t believe how fast this year has gone.” Mack sighs, looking at the streaks of the sunset across the sky.
“I know. He is so big. How is he already cruising on those legs so fast?”
“I don’t know. We need to do better baby proofing here.”
“Yeah.” David agrees. “It’s hard cause there is so much more stuff he can get into now. I feel like we need those alerts on the door for next summer that ding when the door opens.”
“Oh for sure.” Mack nods enthusiastically. “When you were out with Cody, before his nap, he was grabbing all the pictures from the tables and throwing them. Literally, throwing them.”
“He is gonna be a little terror and I love it.”
“The next one better be a girl.”
“Next one, eh?” He grins at her.
“I would do this again with you, babe.” She says quietly, pressing her smile into his bicep.
“Soon?”
“Let’s get through this season. Next summer we can talk. When we have a two year old.” Mack instantly tears up. “I hate that it goes as fast as they say.”
“Me too, baby. That’s why we will just have to keep adding to this pack.”
“That’s not the solution.” She rolls her eyes.
“I know. I just want a ton of babies with you. Our life is so full and incredible.”
Mack smiles.
She could do 100 more years of this life with him.
Read more Mack and David here.
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I’ve been pretty much letting the queue run this blog for a few weeks now. Things are just toxic on here and not super great irl so idk I may just let the queue run out. I don’t have the energy or mental health to keep up with this anymore.
#sorry to anyone I’ve not responded to in a while#it takes a lot of energy to keep up conversations and everything and I have shit irl that’s demanding my time and energy#it’s very draining and especially at this time of year I’m just tired#maybe it’s time for me to be done with this app#I’ve been on it long enough
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Guess who’s rewatching fantasy high!!!! It’s meeeeeeee
I forgot how fun they all were freshman year I just love them all so much
#hoping to maybe design some more of the bad kids#but who knows what I’ll have time for#I just got done with college apps so I can finally make art for myself again so this is me doing that!#d20#kristen applebees#fanart#fantasy high fanart#fantasy high#dimension 20#fantasy high freshman year#fantasy high sophomore year#fantasy high junior year#my art
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sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:
thing that I already do
thing I have tried 10 times
thing I already do
thing that I don't have the money to do
thing I already do
thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail
thing that is impossible given my situation
thing that doesn't apply to me
thing that I already do
thing I have already tried
hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently
thing I have already done
#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things#out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever#all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever#or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc.#especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple#and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already#done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and#all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you.#who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3#my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster#talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo#I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache#or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop#e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all#sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef#t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of#way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I#think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i#gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!'#like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant#mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain#or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right#now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like#most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once#that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY#Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth
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I've watched the reintegration scene SEVEN TIMES now and I still get full body chills from it..
The slight change in his voice when he says "you mean what quarter?" is INSANE!!! Ever so slightly more child-like and higher in pitch than all his previous answers ... Fucking 😭 And then the editing.. how was his posing so precise despite the costume changes ?? The precision angles and exact same expressions. The scene and episode ending with the phrase "who are you?" The same phrase that starts the show?? (And again when Mark first meets Reghabi)
SHOCK. AWE. WONDER.
#sidebar I will never NEVER forgive Twitter for spoiling it for me#it was still the DAY the episode aired#opened Twitter and BAM the very first thing I see#no tags no spoiler warning#nothing#I shut the app so fast#but it was too late#I knew he would reintegrate at the end of E3 before getting to watch it for myself#maybe this is extreme idk I'm autistic for reference but I felt sick and cried and stayed up all night#because I was so upset it was spoiled#due to this experience I have a new rule lmao#no social media NOT EVEN A PEEK until I've seen all severance content as it comes out#not giving the internet another chance to do that to me again#I have fully learned my lesson holy shit that sucked#saw a comment earlier saying they're sad they can't watch the ep for the first time again#and got jealous#because they got to EXPERIENCE A FIRST TIME#I KNEW IT WAS COMING THE WHOLE EPISODE UGGHHHHHHHH#anyway just had to whine and cry about that for a bit#I know it's my fault :( I know better now#I've never been hyperfixated on an actively airing tv show before in my defense#it's always been on things that literally can't be spoiled#where everything I could possibly learn about the interest was sought out and welcomed#wow I am the yapper right now I'm done lmao#mine
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Drifting / 浮游
(youtube)
singer: Zhou Shen 周深 lyrics: Ou Xiaoxiao 欧小晓 score: Qiling 齐凌
this is my 10th song TL!
PS. i know the atmosphere's been a bit down in this small 生米区... hope everyone's okay! 加油米米们!!
天已经微亮 我睁开双眼
as the sky lightens / i open my eyes
长夜漫漫总有散 来到故事终点
as the long night disperses / us, at the story’s end
如果有人问 此生不悔
if someone asks / if you regret this life
碰触着你的地方 刻下纠缠印痕
encountering your position / our outlines entangle
说再见不是离别 何必追赶着句点
saying goodbye isn’t a parting / no need to chase the full-stop
思念在一瞬间
in a split-second
倾倒地平线
memory overturns the skyline
荒野在歌唱 大地在缄默
the wilderness sings / the earth keeps silent
光粒穿透海 大地在缄默
light pierces the through sea / flowers bloom in the dust
游蜉望着天 誓言追光影
a dragonfly stares into the sky / and swears to chase the light
灵魂在寻找 时间缝隙
the soul is searching / for rifts in time
和你的方向
and your direction
寻寻觅觅也不曾怀疑
during the search, never once doubting
思念描绘你轮廓
memory contours your outline
命运是否能重叠
if these lives can overlap
说永远太过遥远 让瞬间冻结时间
saying forever is too distant / let time freeze in this second
浮游在天地间
drifting in this vast world
拥抱着原点
embracing this root
荒野在歌唱 大地在缄默
the wilderness sings / the earth keeps silent
光粒穿透海 大地在缄默
light pierces the through sea / flowers bloom in the dust
游蜉望着天 誓言追光影
a dragonfly stares into the sky / and swears to chase the light
灵魂在寻找 时间缝隙
the soul is searching / for rifts in time
和你的方向
and your direction
传奇太遥远 良夜已来临
the myth’s too distant / the good night arrives
我们的歌谣 回响在远方
our songs and singing / ring in the distance
四季的轮换 渺小也伟大
the seasons’ turning / minute and massive
最后的箴言 流唱世间
the final motto / sweeps through the world:
是心永不灭
these hearts won’t be doused
#figured i'd post this since it's been in my drafts long enough#the 和你的方向 part always fucks me upp (no spotify or free QQ upload! sad 【that's why we have apps like MusicX ig hshshsh#the next song i'm gonna tl is also a zs song! but a bit more complicated in terms of language n structure 【but it's shorter than 浮游#maybe once i'm done with that one i'll do a poll for the one after it#浮游 barely took any time to learn and translate 【knew most of the words already#super fun and very good to work with#zhou shen#周深#chryso.tl#song translation#translation
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Picture a grave Picture six feet freshly dug The sharp temporary walls At the long-term cliff edge of the world Light and air find some new deepness there And usher down the sky where One stands by and tries to make sense of it
alternate versions from before my stupid app crashed and refused to let me open this specific piece again :(
#trimax#trigun#vash the stampede#nicholas d. wolfwood#vashwood#trigun spoilers#technically this isn't done I would've liked to tweak it more etcetc#but#after I saved this to show it to friends my app crashed and now Refuses to let me back in#it just crashes every time i try#so huh it's done i guess hahahaaaa sobs#i wanted to try some blur effect on woowoo maybe#and fix/add some details and maybe try a full colored version#AH WELLLL THANKS FOR NOTHING YOU STUPID APP#anyway anyway sorry i too am suffering </3#bee draws
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I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but for a long time now I've noticed huge swaths of people following me after going through my entire blog spam-liking my rise fanart, and ignoring literally everything else- and to those people I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I will not be drawing rise fanart again.
#dove speaks#ive been noticing this happening for like. a year now. so i thought maybe i should say something about it#the hyperfixation died a long time ago and I just want to work on my personal art and original pieces now#and it's been really disheartening to open this app every day to see hundreds of new likes on rise fanart from 4 years ago#and barely even one or two for my original pieces constantly#so if you literally only followed me to consume rise content and you don't care about my other stuff or me as a person...#well. do what you want but you won't be seeing new rise fanart from me again lol#after the fashion zine is over I'm done
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Really shitty sketch page of Gryphon for that jrwi comic I said I was gonna do like two or three weeks ago
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(Plus some notes)
#I’m still not done with the line art ;-; I’m gonna work on it today I PROMISE#jrwi riptide#sketch#yk now that I think of it I don’t know how gryphons name is spelled so I can’t tag him in it#damn. anyways uh if your seeing something like this for the first time from me I’m making a mini fan comic of a clip in#sry I had to exit out of the app to check it’s a clip from episode 94 in riptide and I said I was gonna finish it in a month but I haven’t#so maybe another month haha
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"Our thing connects to an app!!!"
Ah... I hate it
#name me a thing and I'll tell you why I don't want it connecting to an app#this time it was me looking into something you could plug stuff into and have it tell you how much energy it used#and so many are like 'it'll send it into an app'#well that's stupid; and I'd like it to just tell me the info on it's own little screen#...saw some brewing video where... mhh... that's right; it was something to measure the... something volume related#you use it to calculate the alcohol content; I'm no brewer; just might like to someday so I sometimes watch stuff#anyway; guess what? app; no screen; only app#...I will fucking just learn to do it the old school way thank you; I'd love for you to make it so I don't have to do math#but not enough to deal with your fucking app that you'll stop supporting in 2 years#juicero ass mentality#'we've made two rocks that squeeze juice out of a drm'd juicebox; please use our app'#fuck your app; fuck it forever#the number of use cases where I want to use an app approach zero#honestly I really only play games on my phone or use it rarely for tumblr/discord... mostly for photos#and even there the games would probably be better on my computer (why are phone emulator's such ass?)#in short; if you tell me the thing you sold me will use an app to work... die#everything ought to be able to be done via the thing itself#...I can maybe; and it's a big maybe; but I can maybe forgive if like... I set up a battery and some kind of house grid control... thing#and I can either interface directly with it via my computer and a usb port; a screen; or if I feel like it an app... maybe... maybe ok#(though... that's a security risk for sure)#but point is apps can fuck off and die forever#they're stupid as hell
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/3.11.24
#it’s incredible how i feel tired just by the thought of swiping peoples profiles on a friend/meet app#like I really have to force myself#I forced myself to say to a girl I saw in july if she wanted to meet and she couldn’t back then and now I’m like okay I tried it I’m#I whine to myself I’m lonely yet looking for people is not a thing I fancy#I am convinced the people who would matter wouldn’t be found like this anyway#but chances of meeting people are 0#still clinging on to this person I met at the only friends of friend group thing which is almost sci -fi for me#despite I probably shouldn’t#and on top ov everything I always mess everything up because I can’t communicate well what I feel or actually I don’t really know that anywa#colleague added to me to a chat group pf expats here it doesn’t look exciting but I imagined that#I should see a high school mate after xmas#i am genuinely glad about it#although I am kinda thinking I should probably pretend it’s all fine#last time was..2020 which feels like yesterday but is 4 years ago#Jesus cjrist#maybe I should still reply to that girl who gave me depression but her and the sister were quite into me#asked like in may if i wanted to hang out and do creative stuff (3rd time#and I had told myself after the second time which was also major depression time and winter#blues#that I was done with it although always pretending it was fun#but god I was getting depression from them#would take pics of us where I think I never forced a smile more than that time#and my policy is just b clear and polite#but I swear I don’t have energies to just text and say sorry we don’t match
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*covered in blood* i applied for the job
#to be clear: they are requiring a degree that i do not have yet. i am one semester away#so the odds of me getting even an interview w the sort of competition they will have for this position are VERY low#BUT i do have 5 years of experience in the area they are wanting plus another 3 in just general field experience#but regardless of that i haven't applied to a job in over 7 years so this was a big step for me lol#i have a resume! and a cover letter! and really beefy references!#i wont start job hunting in full until i graduate but the timing of this was too perfect for me to pass up#my cover letter will have to be rewritten for each app ofc but my resume is pretty much done. maybe some tweaking to wording for each app#but otherwise its solid#i dont THINK i need a linkedin? its unclear#maybe that will be my next step#but either way i feel weird but in a good way#i even managed to write a cover letter that didn't sound like a corporate drone but was also very professional#its a little short all things considered but its too late now lmao#now i. wait. until mid november lmfao
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So, Jess I know you’re not an artist like your bestie in the entire world snap… but what does your art look like I remember you doodled this little pic for me of Tien with Choatzu’s make up lol but have you’ve drawn anything else?
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Ya
#i draw a lot i just dont post it all the time bc well... sometimes i dont like em sometimes i forget sometimes its just a personal lil thing#i havent painted for months bc i lost my paints but Snap actually bought me some replacements for my birthday the other day so 🫶#maybe i'll try and paint daigo or somethin and post it sometime soonish#in his honour#or maybe Tsutumi bc i like his face it might be fun to do................#or another baba since i sure like daito#or maybe i will just continue doin the boys from my REDACTED group lioe i have been the past few months#i have done haruka and majima but i couldnt find the posts in my tag and im dying of a flu or maybe covid (real not clickbait)#so i dont feel like gettin up n goin on my computer. i mostly had to screenshot these from insta lol#but yeah. i do also do stuff :)#ask#also yeah we made exactly 5 days into the year before my body decided to fuck me over so uhhhhhhh bodes well#genuinely feel like ive been hit by a truck and i have such a bad headache still havent played gaiden 😭#also why does answering on tumblr mobile app lately be so weird ???#like freezes the app keeps reloading cant look at notifs til i close it and reopen ? anyone else have that issue
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#ok minor stress rant that I’ll delete later but just have to vent#I house sat for two weeks for this professor and it was the most stressful and intensive dog sitting I’ve ever done#because they failed to mention all three dogs are rescues with severe medical issues including heart failure#it was. a lot.#I finally get back home yesterday after making the house spotless and I guess I figured I’d get paid yesterday which was maybe naive#instead I find out someone charged $500 to my card fraudulently so I had to get my card frozen#so I’ve had no access to ANY money since yesterday#last time this happened I called my bank and they sorted it out quickly and while on the phone they got me a new card and set it up#and even helped me add it to my digital wallet#this time I called and the girl sounded so confused and said she issued me a new card but to check out their app and I could do all that#except every time I use the app it says the system is down. so I still have no way to access any of my money.#keep in mind this is a hometown credit union so I can’t just run to a branch and pick one up#so I am now on day two without access to money#to make matters more annoying the prof said they’d reach out today to set up payment.#I waited all day until 5 pm and nothing? so I texted to ask if they got home alright or if I can do anything else#and he thanked me and said no I did amazing and it’s much appreciated#and then just. ended the conversation.#like???#sir you put me through HELL for two weeks. I had to give your dogs three baths because of the stuff they got into#you failed to mention your dogs’ complicated medical histories or that one is currently dying#like is it. is it so absurd to expect to be paid the day you say you’re going to pay me#not like I could access it anyway.#I hate this
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Haven’t been sleeping well because, and this is the stupidest reason, I’m so full of damnable longing. All I do is yearn and pine and want.
#I hate it!#I just want to fall in love!#not long distance. not through an app. I want to meet someone and be awkward and flirt and be messy and work for it.#I’m 35 now and I feel like I’m too old for that#which yeah I know sounds ridiculous. life goes on. I’ve got time. blah blah blah.#but I do wish I’d done the standard meeting and falling for someone in school and marrying young and having kids#all that milquetoast basic stuff#BUT IT’S NOT BASIC! I want that! I want that security and young love that just grows and grows!#can you imagine building that kind of connection with someone?#I know there’s plenty of valid criticisms towards marrying your high school sweetheart but come on… lemme dream a little#I don’t want to fill out applications online and trawl dating sites for someone!#I want the friends to awkward more than friends to maybe more to yes! please why did we wait I know you. I’ve known you. I accept you.#I want someone to know me and want me for who I am#aaaaaaaaaa I’m fucking foaming at the mouth#I can’t stop thinking about it and it makes my chest ache so much#and I feel like I’m too old for that! I have no social life! I’m not in school around other people! how could this even happen for me?#stupid!#😮💨… okay… calm down Ian… it’s cool. we’re cool.#I don’t want to sleep. I just want to lay in bed and imagine being in love all night.#gross. gross gross gross.#you can ignore this#goodbye forever#text
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