#now i. wait. until mid november lmfao

[depresseddepot]

*covered in blood* i applied for the job

[messiambrandybuck]

Wait whatttttt did you have shitty roommates for a while before you got your own apartment? I never heard this!

Okay so!

In late August of 2022 (around the 28th) I moved into a house with my partner, where we were going to rent a room and live with 3 other people, including the land lady. (my housemates had a pitbull/catahoula mix, a chocolate lab, a cat named Aggie, a foster named Max, and then a wolfdog hybrid. Our landlady has three cats). Bonus points for the landlady being a hoarder but the sweetest woman on the planet. But definitely a hoarder.

Towards october-ish, one of my housemates and I talked about how Aggie had bonded with me, and decided to officially pass over the ownership so he was my cat. (He's going to be a year old in june <3). In November, I experienced a traumatic experience with a now ex-partner that has forever since changed my perception of that living space, and the people within it (to no fault of their own).

I can't remember when exactly, but near the end of the year/start of 2023, there was a "domestic" dispute. While my partner was at work, my housemates fought verbally, and then their alters fought physically. And then I was dragged into the middle of it physically/emotionally/you name it. I suffered. Many a ptsd attack, and I was genuinely afraid for the safety of everyone involved.

I had started bringing up apartments I thought were nice and affordable for about a month prior, but that entire shitshow, and the tension that followed after, motivated my partner to find us our own living space. There was also just a lot of toxicity flowing off of one of the housemates, and despite being friends with him it really killed my mental health to hear him shit-talking my partner, even after I would ask him not to. One of those types that confuse being an asshole to being blunt, and since he's autistic he feels validated in being blunt (which he is! but. yknow. he's usually not just being blunt.)

Mid-February of this year, my partner went to Italy with their family while I stayed at their mothers house (neither of us wanted to risk me being alone for another fight), and it was the best week I'd had in a long time, motivation wise. It was the moment I realized that the living space I was in was my problem. All the negativity and uncleanliness put me in the worst depression of my life.

On March 17th, we started the move into the apartment we're currently in! Our landlady tried to claim we had to pay 1,000USD for window damage, because the house was old and if you opened one of the windows it wouldn't shut. My partner tried to explain that it was wear and tear (since we didn't cause the window to stop working), and that made the Toxic Housemate super pissed, and he took it out on me. (using my anxiety against me, because he loves using past trauma as a fighting tactic. swell guy. /s) The landlady refused to let us grab the rest of our stuff until we paid, but my partner's father just fixed the window and we were able to get the rest of our stuff out.

Anyways uh. Yeah! That's a semi-detailed, pretty thorough timeline of the Big Events that happened in that household. Loved the dogs, loved one of the housemates like a brother, but it was an entire shitshow lmfao.

[oh-phineas]

Monday, November 11 — The Comment Section: Write ten comments your character has left around the Internet— perhaps a YouTube video of a song that means something to them, a TikTok that they got into a fight in the comments of, a recipe that they tested from FoodNetwork.com… the sky’s the limit! Can be from the same site or different ones.

Uploaded October 2008

flynneas 14 years ago

Thank You for posting this. It is a truly AMAZING moment of White Sox history. I watch it any time I am feeling down and it puts me in a great mood. GO SOX!!!!!!!!!

flynneas 12 years ago

@.cubsrule07 WHY ARE YOU BEING A HATER??? This video freaking rules. Yes 2012 was not their best year but just wait until spring. They will blow the cubs out of the water. But most of all why would you come over here and be a hater when this video speaks for itself?! The Sox are a great team no matter their record. It's not just about winning and losing. You however will always be a loser if you keep acting like this!!!

flynneas 10 years ago

fun fact: my dad was at this game lol. saw this happen in real life.

flynneas 8 years ago

obviously the catch is epic but can we talk about the celebration? that's the best part of this whole thing imo, the pure joy like nothing bad could happen. you can tell these guys worked their asses off for this, maybe some of them were cheering on the team when they won the ws back in 05 and now they were excited to be a part of the magic. and to me it doesn't even matter that they went on to lose after this. it's one perfect moment and no one can ever take that away from them

flynneas 8 years ago

i guess the other reason this is my favorite white sox moment (over the 2005 ws win) is because it's the one i remember. i was too young to remember 2005 but this was like the first season i remember ever really paying attention to baseball. so yeah it's not the most perfect moment in sox history but it's important to me

flynneas 6 years ago

lol every time i look this video up i see the graveyard of old comments i've left. look i just really love this clip lol don't judge me

flynneas 5 years ago

watching this the night before i move out of illinois probably forever. weird to think i might never see the grate again (what? that's what it's called)

flynneas 2 years ago

you know i'm pretty sure my dad lied about a lot of things he always told me he was at this game but like. he could never prove it lol. anyway i guess it doesn't really matter anymore.

flynneas 1 year ago

you know what i really fucking love about this clip? it's a fucking outfielder. brian anderson had a mid batting average and he only hit like 8 runs that season, and he eventually got sent down to triple a (oh yeah, and the sox are kind of shit now, hello from 2023). i think he coaches college baseball. you have to really dig to even find his wikipedia page. but for a minute he gets to be a hero.

and you can see in that celebration just how much it means to him. how much it means to all of them.

i think that's what i love about baseball. 90% of the work is totally invisible to the average person but your teammates see it and when it finally pays off everyone goes fucking crazy. all those practices. all those years grinding away. and you get one perfect gift from the sky and you leap for all your worth and it's all you and now you're the guy. you're the fucking guy.

i mean, what's that thing they say? you can't help but be romantic about baseball?

flynneas 4 months ago

i miss when watching this team was not an exercise in torture lmfao

[depths-of-escapism-archive]

Alright um wow! i actually kept up with this! if you don’t know i started drawing as a new years resolution lol and um wow! here i am doing a year end review! also like?? the fact i started out with a few random colored pencils i found in my basement, a single pencil, and a single sheet of paper?? and that’s all i used for 2 and a half months??? aND now im using a whole ass drawing tablet??? it’s kinda wild lol Also from this point forwards i post higher quality versions of the art & go into details about the art so um yeah, it’s a *very* long post to end the year on

January 2020 um yeah i had only started drawing like 4 days before this and wow it fucking shows lmao (also all of my first drawings are just straight up scenes from Ghost & Pals PVs because wow froggy your so creative only drawing the things you watch on youtube lmfao)

February 2020 Okay but like,, yeah yeah i get i only had a month of experience and all of my experience happened on a single piece of paper but like?? why is this one so fucking bad?? lmao like i remember even at the time of making it i hated it lmao. Also super cool note this was my first drawing i did in full color! i later decided that it looked weird having only a bit of the paper colored so i went back and colored the whole thing because dumbass froggy is a dumbass

March 2020 omg woah is that more drawings of ghost & pals oc’s in the exact same pose as in the PV?? that’s like, so creative bro Also the fact that i very clearly remember thinking that his head was *way* too small to be realistic but i felt like the older art where there heads are literally wider then there whole ass body was fine??? hewwo??? froggy?? you good? like i know your kinda stupid but heWWO???

April 2020 Okay okay okay heres where things start to get interesting 1. I found a sketchbook and was no longer limited to that single piece of paper 2. I started editing my photos so i could actually get the colors i wanted 3. I started my tumblr uwu! 4. and i actually?? don’t hate this?? like yeah it’s still not creative in the slightest but it’s not *bad* and i kinda like that shade of red :flushed: May 2020 yeah no your not getting a high quality version of this So basically this was the month when i started moving over to digital art using my phone and wow was that rough getting used to (but also it was so much easier for me to do with my set up lmao) June 2020 Yeah i like to pretend this one doesn’t exist lmfao This was the month where i first started taking like?? proper reference photos for my art and i was actually starting to be creative with it and come up with my own ideas,, just,, all of my art from this month looks *exactly* like the reference photos except worse to the point where im not sure if i can even call it art lmfao

July 2020 To say this month of my life was a shitshow wouldn’t even begin to cover it lmao so um yeah, i drew that! also?? if i remember correct my mother stole the little art supplies i had just cause and that’s why this one isn’t in color or anything lmao

August 2020 I feel like it was around this point that my digital art actually started being *somewhat* good but i still wasn’t *super* happy with it 

September 2020 This is literally the only thing i drew in september and it took all of like 10 mins lmao,  I remember feeling just kinda burnt out and like i had no ideas by this point cause as we have figured out im *very* well known for being creative

October 2020 By this point it had been 3 months since i had done a full traditional drawing so i remember being like ummm i really should do *something* but not really actually liking this art lmao

November 2020 Feeling like i had wasted like the whole year drawing wise and feeling like i was capable of doing so much more i decided to try and do a full drawing everyday for this whole month and yeah! i fucking did that lmao, i feel like this was this month was the first time i ever really like, *understood* shading and how to use color ig? i also feel like i really kinda found out what i *actually* wanted to make this month so that’s very cool December 2020 You guys are gonna have to wait until these posts go up in january to see this art in high quality sorry not sorry Can i just?? can i just say how fucking good it felt to be able to make whatever i wanted without having to rush to finish it before midnight every day? and i really did just make what i wanted to meaning that this month i made more edgy shit then normal and just aghhh feels good man aLSO ALSO i got a drawing tablet mid way through this month so um yeah, still getting used to that lol overall im like, really actually kinda proud of how far my art has come within a year and i really don’t have any plans to stop soon! and lastly thank you to everyone who has followed me! (also shout out to like, all of you guys watching me from the begining because damn fan art does so much better then my oc art lmfao)

[grayembers]

I keep meaning to make a life update post for old friends here, but I wanted to wait until it was all good news instead of mixed, but I’m just gonna accept that won’t happen and update people anyway!

tl;dr I’m graduating with a master’s in computer science soon, job hunting sucks, theses suck don’t do grad school, I play a disgusting amount of Overwatch, and my cat is still super fluffy and great

Still together with Austin, and maybe going to visit him after I graduate. ouo  He’s a constant good presence in my life, and it’s really made me realize what healthy relationships are like lmao. Hindsight is 20/20. But yee he humors all my OT3 plotting and I get to listen to him geek out about musicals recently, it’s very cute. C:

I also have a great set of local friends here, although now I’m worried what’ll happen when I move away for a job. And one of them has been studying abroad this semester so I’ve barely seen her. But they’re all A+ people and we like to play board games and I’ve even dabbled in DnD with them.

We had a stray cat in the house for a few months last semester/into winter, but we finally found a foster group willing to take him in and look for a home even though he had FIV and is kinda old. He was definitely going to die if we hadn’t taken him in, even continued vet care and being indoors only couldn’t really cure his upper respiratory infection. My friend/housemate Michelle was pretty sad to see him go, he was kinda hers even though she knew she couldn’t realistically keep a cat right now. ;o;

I waste a lot of time playing games. Overwatch is my coping mechanism for depression, I hit level 600+ recently it’s pretty pathetic. I do some comp in mid plat, and I’ve actually made a nice set of friends to play with as well. One who happens to go to this same school (I guess we started playing together through friends of friends, but those middle links don’t play anymore) and some elsewhere. So I’m actually on Discord a lot for game reasons! And GrayEmbers#1544, happy to play with friends.

Ooh, I also bought Oxygen Not Included (and convinced Austin to) the other week, which is Klei’s new game - the company that did Don’t Starve. It’s in super early alpha so tons of bugs, but I’m excited to see it grow just like I did with Don’t Starve. So much future content, and I already like it as it is.

I’m trying to shift some of my time-wasting activities to drawing and writing instead of Overwatch. Especially when I find I’m just playing and not having fun. Drew a few things recently, and have had Ryker/Veronica/Christine AU fic in the works since February (and post shit regularly on the side blog), and I’ve really been enjoying renewed character activity with Austin’s newer courier and a friend of Silt’s! Nyl/Red Lucy is the real OTP. Also, I’ve almost convinced two irl friends to play FNV, they’re probly sick of hearing me talk about it lmfao. It’ll always have a special place in my heart.

School happens. Somehow I’m going to be allowed to graduate in a few months without contributing anything useful to the world. I feel like the only thing I really learned in grad school was how academia works, so as far as Computer Science goes, I wouldn’t recommend it unless your endgoal is research or academia. Don’t get me wrong, I took some neat classes and read some really cool research, but I’d already learned most of my hard skills from undergrad so. shrugs. My research I’m being paid to do this academic year involves taking technology into hiking or outdoor settings, and I’m focusing especially on the cultural aspects of it. For example, people react very differently to a person reading a book in nature versus looking at a phone screen in nature when in reality that person could be reading an e-book, they have no idea.

Things are kind of rough again mental health wise, but I dug this hole myself by procrastinating on my thesis which I now have to write in 1.5 months, so. I want to die a lot of the time but I don’t think that’s gonna happen. But if anyone is up for ramming me with their car going 60, hmu literally.

Jobs will probably happen?? I don’t have anything lined up yet and my interests pull me in like 10 directions, but I’m looking pretty seriously into UX design stuff and possibly contracting work in tech. Dream job is still to work with virtual reality and/or gesture interfaces, but that didn’t happen in grad school (partially my own fault partially shitty circumstances) so I don’t know if I have the right qualifications.

Can’t wait to move somewhere and have a job with set hours and get more pets and build a new computer because I can.  ;~;  (No idea where yet, I just know I don’t want to go any farther south because summer is the worst.)

My older brother is getting married in November, which’ll be my third wedding of the year lol. And my Dad and stepmom moved back to the states from China! They’re in Baltimore, I’ve gone to see them once already and probably will again on the tail end of a friend’s wedding. Their dog is super cute holy shit.

Okay now that I’ve lost 90% of readers, I also lowkey wanted to mention I had top surgery over winter break, which you might be able to tell from the two selfies above. If you happen to know me irl but hadn’t heard yet, please keep it to yourself. I still identify as female and use female pronouns, but I’m absolutely loving my new chest and so happy that I saved up for it. ;u; If you’re a mutual and wanna ask particulars or about the process or anything, feel free to message me privately.

Actually, I’ve been meaning to start exercising or something because there’s actually a chance now I can completely like my body shape lmfao. Stress eating is too real though