#maybe i could work thru it
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
💬
#im getting tired of my brain not working#this isnt a teehee forgot a word joke#im full on forgetting real things#imagining stuff thats not there#confusing a song i heard once with#one ive heard 1000 times over the past years#i cant do basic math#and its severely limiting my writing now too#i cant come up with sentences#this is no longer funny#it is not viable to live rn 👍#im done for a while i cant do this#if i aas just depressed or my brain just weird#maybe i could work thru it#but its BOTH and i CANT#and im sick of being in friend limbo#i talk to a few ppl am friendly on here#but i don't have any consistent friends#and it makes me upset when i see others being so friendly#last night was fucking rough#i was thinking mean things abt innocent mutuals#and its my fault im the one at fault#so im just gonna. be gone for a while#one less thing to get upset about#this is pathetic#i wish i could rip my brain out of my head#its caused me so much pain#over the years like#i really cant take it anymore
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
belbel and her brothers !! 🕺🕺💃
#hetalia world stars#hws belgium#hws netherlands#hws luxembourg#should i have actually gone thru the axis and allies before i drew these guys. maybe#but also im a fool who falls in love with side and background characters#the tomato gang has always been my faves ever since the 2011 halloween comic ngl#my art#sorry luxe i could have done a better drawing for u but im so busy bc of work and i wanted to crank these out
236 notes
·
View notes
Text
Navy Curry Straight Out From 'Hama: Hypmic Curry Drama Track TL
i was able to get the hypmic curry and figured it’d be cool to share what the tracks were about!! the tracks themselves aren’t publicly available tho, so do buy the curry if it becomes available again!! enjoy!!!
——————
Rio: *humming a tune*
Rio: …Go Shawty🎵 Go Shawty🎵
Samatoki: …Damn it.
Juto: We really are in a bind…
Rio: Why are you both just standing over there for?
Juto: O-Oh, it’s just, I can’t help but be in awe over the amount of disgus— fine ingredients you have…
Rio: My catch was exceptional today. The gods of the hunt must have felt generous.
Samatoki: Rio, just to be clear, you said you’re making curry right?
Rio: Affirmative; I’ve also prepared spices. Everything has been properly gathered.
Samatoki: T-That’s great then…
Samatoki: No matter which way he cooks it, nobody’s gonna want to eat this…!
Juto: I can already see us getting reported to the Consumer’s Bureau. The lawsuits are just waiting to happen…
Rio: What are you two whispering about?
Samatoki: Nothing.
Juto: It’s nothing!
Cow: *moos*
Juto: A cow?!
Rio: I was fortunate enough to have caught a bull alive in one of my traps.
Samatoki: So, we could have had a beef curry, huh…
Juto: Clearly! So how do we get him to use that instead??
Samatoki: I got this. Hey, Rio, you’re not gonna use the cow in the curry? I think it’d be fine with just that.
Rio: No, I intend to use just these ingredients. More ingredients do not necessitate a better curry.
Juto: Of course that’s the response!
Rio: Now then, let’s begin cooking. First, is the onion. Chop it into small pieces and fry it in butter until golden brown.
Juto: U-Understood.
Rio: Samatoki, I’ll leave you to grate the apples.
Samatoki: T-That’s a hell of a lot of apples.
Rio: I intend for them to be a standout flavour in the curry. After, combine them with the fried onions.
Samatoki: S-Sure.
Rio: As for me, I will be preparing the fond de veau.
Juto: At this rate, the curry will be completed as intended…!
Samatoki: Maybe I can knock him out…? No, Rio doesn’t have any openings.
Rio:…Hm?
Samatoki: What’s wrong?
Rio: I’ve used up too much water preparing the ingredients and don’t have enough to use in the curry. May you keep an eye on everything as I go and retrieve more water from the spring?
Juto: Of course! You won’t have to worry about us here!
Samatoki: Make sure you watch your step heading out there.
Rio: Thank you. I’ll be back soon.
Juto: With the way Rio moves, it’ll probably be 10 minutes before he returns… Within that time, we must get rid of those ingredients somehow!
Samatoki: Juto! Don’t just stand there looking stupid and come help me out here!
Juto: ?! You’re making a hot pot with those ingredients? What are you intending to do with that??
Samatoki: Just shut up and cook!
Juto: Then I suppose you have a plan in mind?
Samatoki: Yeah.
————————————
Samatoki: It’s about done. Oi, Juto. Here.
Juto: A fork? Why would I—? Surely you can’t mean—!
Samatoki: Better clench that gut. This is the only way!
Juto: Guh! Never would I have expected to have to protect Yokohama in this way…!
Samatoki & Juto: Here we go!
Samatoki & Juto: *choking down the food*
Rio: Samatoki, Juto, what’s going on—? We don’t have any ingredients left?
Samatoki: S-Sorry about that Rio. I just got too hungry to wait.
Juto: W-With all this food around, I couldn’t bring myself to stop eating.
Rio: I see… Apologies, I didn’t realise how hungry the both of you had gotten. …Well, I suppose I will just have to use this cow in the curry.
Juto: Yes, it truly is a shame, but it seems we have no other choice but to do so!
Samatoki: Haha! With our “Navy Curry Straight Out From ‘Hama,” we’re winning this whole thing!
#samatoki aohitsugi#jyuto iruma#rio mason busujima#mad trigger crew#hypmic#hypnosis mic#the vids came with subtitles so i could actually go line by line lol#i’m not the most practiced with any hypmic character voices except bat’s so i apologise if they don’t sound right i tried 😭😭😭#as for release schedule uhhhhhhhhhh maybe every other day so i can get time to tl while having a work week#and to also give bb more time to come in lol 😭😭😭😭#mtc’s curry was good!!!! i kinda wanna see if i could make my own tho since the apple flavour didn’t come thru lol#also also the title is me referencing straight outta compton but hating how the title looked lol#curry tl
64 notes
·
View notes
Text
i promise i’m working on the rahu fic but HEAR ME OUT: YUKONG X READER PACIFIC RIM AU
jaded ex-ace pilot yukong who lost her drift partner, caiyi, and has never set foot in a jaeger since. she’s content to live out her days of retirement until an abomination (kaiju) wrecks her neighbourhood, an attack in which she barely escapes alive alongside her daughter. some friends of her aren’t as lucky. the kaiju destroys two other jaegers before it’s finally put down by a jaeger barely clinging to life. they name the kaiju calamitas, for the calamity it inflicted. it is fitting.
the situation is terrible. bad enough, that the general of the defense corps comes to see her personally. general jing yuan bows to her on his knees, and begs for her return. she wants to say no—how could she ever drift with anyone else—but in the end, her weakness is her daughter. in that moment of righteous fury, qingni looked like the stunning image of her mother.
so she goes. she follows jing yuan in his helicopter as they make their way to the base. it has hardly changed over the years, a dome made of iron and steel, sweat and blood. there are ghosts in every corner here, nestled so closely amongst the living they are almost indistinguishable. a part of her naively hopes that she might turn a corridor and see a familiar head of brown hair and ears.
they go through many candidates. from rookies to seasoned pilots, no one could drift alongside the former ace. the words are on the tip of her tongue—i told you so. but jing yuan gives her a placating smile, and says, just one more.
the candidate who walks in is you. you’re young, maybe qingni’s age, but there’s a hauntedness in your eyes that yukong understands.
jing yuan does the honours of listing your accomplishments. five confirmed kills, and two assists. not bad, for someone as young as you. but then, he mentions what yukong had already guessed.
it was you, that day, who took down calamitas. you, in that half-broken jaeger, your partner dead in their seat, but still connected to you within the drift. you, who piloted a jaeger on your own to deliver the final killing blow. yukong comes to respect you as much as she mourns your loss.
as you strap into the drift chair, she can’t help but wonder. was this jing yuan’s grand strategy this time? to put two pilots who had lost their partners together, so that they could bond in their grief? drift in it? yukong almost wants to laugh—but she doesn’t.
not when less than five minutes later, the computer flashes with the words DRIFT COMPATIBILITY: 100%, NEURAL LINK STABLE. and not when she turns her head to face you, and feels her dead heart stir for the first time in years.
#sev.screams#honkai star rail#hsr#I PROMISE IM WORKING ON RAHU FIC#BUT THIS BRAINROT GOT ME BY THE THROAT#this au is totally self indulgement honestly but maybe if i was a better writer#i could do Themes about the stages of grief#and how people work through that differently#in yukong’s case i’d say she’s stuck in the depression part#as for reader well she’s just fuckin angry babey !! she just like me frfr#(coping by writing my funky little characters Going Thru Shit)#ANYWAY i love pacific rim and pacific rim AUs#the concept of drifting and drift compatibility………… SO sexy#yukong x reader#yukong
101 notes
·
View notes
Text
I WANNA BE YOUR DOG I STAR WARS
#my videos#star wars#palpakin#anakin skywalker#palpatine#revenge of the sith#📹#💾#there will be another horrible one but maybe in a few days#what am i doing with my life?#anyway...#this song could work with so many dynamics in star wars#obikin darth maul and obi wan too it's just so versatile#i can't believe i ask you guys thru a poll which edit i should make next and then i don't follow up on it#i prommy i will i just need an exorcism
191 notes
·
View notes
Text
tough pill i have to swallow is realizing that “getting better” doesn’t mean “getting to do more things,” getting better for me means taking better initiative in protecting myself. and THAT means making sure i do LESS things
#sounds kinda obvious but i only just realized it lmao#feels like i have to grieve a lot of my goals now but no one said the healing process would be easy#danbles#and for anyone else that has a disability that prevents them from doing smth#or trauma that makes certain triggers limit their opportunities#or neurotypes that make it harder for them to love smth like they used to#or whatever else#i don’t want to make it sound like you have to give up on the things that make you happy#I’M certainly not going to#but a huge value of mine has always been experiencing everything life had to offer#and everytime that backfires (whether it’s burnout; triggering a flashback; triggering an episode; putting strain on my body; etc)#i always just thought to myself ‘it was bad timing’ or ‘i haven’t gotten better yet’ bc the endgoal was to always get to that point where#i could experience it. i want to try new things all the time. i want to feel normal and be included in everything#but if smth keeps Making Me Feel Bad then maybe there isn’t a version of myself that can take it on#it’s not resilience to put yourself in harm’s way#idk how well i’ll be able to put this into practice tbh. i rly rly like exploring different experiences#even negative ones are valuable to me#but the least i can do for myself is recognize that i might not always be the problem#maybe i’ve already hit the limit on all the self-work i can do. maybe it’s the environment or situation itself that’s the problem#fuuck guys i feel like i’m going thru a stage of grief here why is this shit so hard 💀
70 notes
·
View notes
Text
im a eurydice = solas truther btw and ill die for my beliefs
be so serious........ and lavellan as orpheus......
#I NEED TO BE LOBOTOMIZED. TRULY.#i dont even know where to start i feel like i cant even post abt this bc theres no way all my thoughts can fit coherently lol#like the 2nd act/hadestown soul-selling business is just solas committing to his goals....#who would win eurydice/solas ''i walk the dinan'shiral - there is only death on this journey'' or orpheus/lavellan walking it anyway lol#to find them and bring them home again#also if the solas-is-a-spirit-that-mythal-bound theory turns out true then the hades = mythal parallels well. they are parelleling <3#''And the choice is yours / if you're willing to choose / Seeing as you've got nothing to lose / And I could use a canary'' HELLO????#ik the other popular interpretation is solas as orpheus but idk solas/eurydice just makes me crazy . it works so well#like theres that one interaction thats like#eurydice: “i havent seen a spring or fall since.... i cant recall”#orpheus "thats what im working on / a song to fix what's wrong / take whats broken#make it whole / a song so beautiful / it brings the world back into tune''#and thats very solas coded. BUT its also such a good parellel to high approval lavellan's fixing the world thru the inquisition/anchor#and thru their kindness and curiosity and all the things he thought were lost in arlathan. the things that make him think maybe shes Real#and it could all be real and worthwhile.#solas recognising the depth and personhood of lavellan thru their [from his pov endearingly naive] actions and spirit#''i havent seen a spring or fall since...i cant recall'' / ''you show a wisdom i have not seen since.... since my deepest journeys into the#ancient memories of the fade'' what if i lost my entire goddamn mind. what if i just completely lost it lol#ok im done im so sorry i feel like harrassing every single person ive ever met with this information like idek what to do with myself lol
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
me and my dad are like abed and jeff in the way that jeff always gets abeds references, theyre two characters that mirror eachother, they understand and relate to eachother in a way thats different from other characters relationships, but also in the way jeff fantasises about strangling abed, "you try to get him to do something normal without abusing him!", "youre a robot, abed". and still jeff goes in for two hugs before abed leaves.
#been trying to work through my feelings about my relationship with my father lately in a healthy way#(through my favourite media)#its sad because if my dad wasnt such a self centred thinks hes smarter than everyone else rude passive agressive dick#maybe we could have the best relationship#because we are so painfully similar#we are literally just like jeff and abed#but i mean jeff said it in the third episode “i dont want to be your father”#my dad wants to help me about as much as jeff wants to help#and yet in the first episode jeff is the one to tell abed “you have aspergers”#and in e3 “abed is not normal”#like hes the first to acknowledge abeds autism he just doesnt care enough to help#and all the sarcastic robot jokes god#those are practically taken out of my fathers mouth#alex says shit#alex is an idiot#community#abed nadir#jeff winger#tagging in case i actually said smth that makes sense but if not take this with a grain of salt its fully me projecting#nbc community#also sorry for familial relationship-ising ur jabed not tryna turn this into jeffannie#just tryna get thru my daddy issues
32 notes
·
View notes
Text
...
#ugh. fuck me im so tired. im getting sucked back into that workaholic mindset and now my body hurts and my nerves are fying. but it feels#good to b productive. if only i didnt have to teach and could just work with data :-(#anyway. the last 2 weeks have been good in that i feel like im actually hitting my stride a bit#bc we're seeing cool things in our genomes and its gonna b really fun to explore. and i met with the terrifying#prof who is on my committee to pitch a project for a final in her class and it seems it went over well. it was kinda funny bc we were#meeting and she was like: so how would u tell which gene was lost 1st? the phytochrome or the genes that r triggered by activation? and i#was like: uhhhhh idk. and then my advisor walked by and she grabbed him and asked him the same question and he was like: idk we'll have to#figure it out. which made me feel way better abt not knowing lol. then my superior lab mate asked me a question abt taking confocal images#and i was actually able to figure out what her issue was. and my old advisor was asking me if i knew anyone to ask for using a pam on cyanos#and i was like: here is what i think my advisor would say and linked her a paper. then i asked my advisor and he said what i expected and#linked the paper that id already sent. so im like. ok. ok. maybe i actually sometimes do kno what im doing. sorta.#and then my old advisor said she was so proud of me. and i was like aw. its so funny bc my relationship is so different with my new advisor#hes great but its all very professional. with my old advisor i would text her after hours bc she was a workaholic like me and went on long#car rides and handed out Halloween candy with her. she was more hands on and doesnt have kids so work is her life. its just interesting#so things have been going well. but there arent enough hours in the day. and my committee meeting is in like 16 days. and i am afraid for#that but not as afraid as i was in april when i had a full on breakdown and canceled it the day before it was set to happen lol#itll b fine. i just have to work thru the weekend so i can get my preproposal done. and prey that the fucking splitstree download site will#start working bc i want to do gene networks dammit#unrelated
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
if escape rooms as team building exercises became popular im not sure if id be more excited or terrified
#if it isnt already anyway.. i can see it happening as a school frosh thing. idk if it would catch on as a workplace thing#i kind of find the concept of being locked in with strangers and working to find a way out weirdly exhilarating though#at least compared to icebreakers cause i dont have to spend 10 minutes racking my brain for something to blurt out abt myself#as a bonus u could like. put people into groups and give prizes to whoever escapes first second third etc. apparently they also do themed#escape rooms.. maybe let people pick a theme? or voluntary sign up? actually this would be really fun for smth like a blind friend date#although if i found out i was locked in a room with an online friend id be too excited to actually escape LOL#ive never done an escape room before so sadly i cant speak from experience. its like up there on things i want to try next to rug tufting#workshop and visiting new art exhibits or conventions. i seriously need to get out more if it wasnt for the horrors <- school and anxiety#i was planning to invite cass to a drop-in art workshop in town but neither of us could go bc typography is making us go thru hell and back#AND THEY HAD A BUTTON MACHINE TOO#im nostalgic bc i miss working in groups and not being awkward abt it or worrying abt schedule conflicts#i realized that i learn best in groups and its a little corny but i like sharing ideas and talking through a problem#in elementary i could just sit down with friends for review and come out of it energized *and* more familiar with the material#and i could technically still do it now. but as adults we're more picky abt who we work with on top of being way more busy outside school#maybe im lonely. im shy and grew up not talking to ppl unless i absolutely have to so its hard to make friends on my own i guess#only thing getting me thru it is telling myself that humans like helping and that my cringe is overblown in my head. but its hard#hence the escape rooms. i have been able to talk to 2(!!) people though!! mostly abt school stuff but im glad to be on friendly terms#i dont really know how to be happy these days cause im constantly scaring myself abt my portfolio and finding places to work#not being ambitious is part of not wanting to put energy into something that wont work out while also not having the passion to do literall#anything else.. i should probably talk to my counsellor ugh#yapping
64 notes
·
View notes
Text
Gear 5 luffy's laugh is so contagious I just hear the drums and go insane how does this work. What did he do to me
#i still cant believe how much this new opening theme goes off.... DREAM SAVE ALL OF US 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH 💥💥💥💥💥💥#wait a second. the robot attacked 200 years ago. the void century was 800 years ago no????? what#oh see it was made 900 years ago.... but why did it attack 200 years ago then.... what happened#it is still so funny how they made evegapunk einstein but with some cunty long legs#200 years ago they gave rights to the gyojin!!! i see i see ✍️✍️also i still wonder why law and kuma have similar hat and pants designs#like there is NO WAY that much similarity isnt done on purpose. NO FUCKING WAY!!! I NEED ANSWERS!!!#are they annihliating cp ships akdhakskd yeah vegapunk letsgo#also the opening song is about dreams and the end one is about luffy reaching shanks...... havent got a clue why but there it is#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 1098#also is lucci named lucci bc it kinda sounds like luffy. SERAPHIM KUMA HAS HIS DEVIL FRUIT???? vegapunk could only make zoan fruits????#also wdym when cp0 acts it means its some historic event. lucci is like 25. where are the experienced people here#sentomaru works for vegapunk??? maybe i forgor about this tbh also do theu have a doffy seraphim??? the fact they have animal names....#stussy letting kaku get hurt akdhsjsn oh atlas has lamb ears..... and lucci said she is is prey... no..... the foresahdowing :(#lucci you fucked up she just gave luffy food... that a death sentence look what happened to kaido#episode 1099#<- oh my god btw. god. jesus.#why is akainu telling the cp0 what to do or thinks he can do that... thats the world gov... also thinkng about how garp should fight him#and not luffy.... because of ace you know... i still wonder how did sengoku know who ace's father was... there is only one man who knew....#everyone trying to stop them from fighting ajdhsksjks two rabid dogs fr#LUFFY TAKING OFF HIS JACKET WHEN LUCCI ASKS FOR HIS WANTED SIGN!!!! GO OFF KING!!!! SLAY!!! THE CREW SAW HIM!!! FINALLY!!!#i have been smiling since he started the transformation this is so sick...... i have got a case of the luffy brain#zoan fruits steal the personality of the user when they awaken ✍️✍️ luffy???? nami being the only one who saw gear 5 <3 twins manifesto#robin being so shook about luffy being a god ajdbjansk wdym devil fruits exist because people wish for them. fairy magic real????#WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY ARE FROM ALTERNATE REALITIES WHERE SOMEONE DREAMT ABOUT THEM??? DOES HE TRAVEL THRU REALITIES FOR THEM???#jinbe has been making this face 😧 every episode three times it is amazing ajdhaksnsk poor man... now he sees a kid angel version of himself#after seeing hia captain turn into a god... he is gonna get a stroke OMG SENTOMARU WE JUST GOT YOU BACK#episode 1100#<- CRAZY. INSANE. OH GOD. ONLY 12 LEFT. THATS A WEEKEND!!! I CANT DO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
Actually, on the topic of the baby fever. God it's so frustrating. Bc when I was like 14 ish I was Adamant that I never ever wanted kids. And my dad said smth around the lines of "that'll likely change" (probably from his own experience with this) and I was like NO. it WONT.
And then eventually, age 21-22 ish, I admitted that Okay, I still don't want to have my own kids, but someday maybe I'll adopt...
And Now, 27 years old, I got the general baby fever on occasion. It Did fucking change. And I don't know if I actually WILL bother with having my own kid (I still don't want to go through the hassle and massive body changes). But god. I do see a fucking baby and feel that stab of longing. It's almost like my damned hormones betrayed me or smth. Maddening!
I shall simply write fanfic about it.
#speculation nation#pregnancy ment/#honestly though i hadnt felt the wish to have my own until after my dad died#and i realized just how small our family is getting. and just felt this stab of NEED. to continue the line. continue the family.#my family's fucking dying around me i need to add to it. need more family. yknow?#so i dont actually know if this is. because of hormones or because of grief or What#but it was enough for me to put the hysterectomy idea on hold. bc id been genuinely considering it back in like. april? or so.#but then this happened and now im like. fuck dude. i dont know. but the uncertainty's enough to keep me from doing it.#yeah i dont wanna deal with periods anymore. but also. i need more time to decide.#i think no matter what i do want to raise kids someday. once im more stable (financially and emotionally)#but whether thats adoption or putting myself thru fuckin body torture. well i'll just have to decide. later.#maybe the deciding factor will be my own body aging lol. if i wait too long. my body will decide for me. who knows!#i Have thought about what id do if i got accidentally pregnant. especially relevant back when i was sleeping with a trans woman#and used to be id abort no hesitation. but well. i mean abortions illegal here anyways rn so id have to go to another state#but if i decided it i could make it work. it's not That far of a trip.#but. when i thought about it. the concern was less about the theoretical baby. and more about finishing school.#thinking 'man itd be fucking awful to finish school if i got pregnant right now'. but not. hesitating over the baby.#if i was out of school and relatively stable and i got accidentally pregnant. then. well. Maybe.#so me doing my dad vash au where he gets accidentally pregnant and goes all in with it#thats me. sorting out my feelings on it i guess. putting them somewhere.#idk. it's a lot to think about. i dont want to condemn a child to my genetic problems. but at the same time...#i dont know. To Be Decided Later.
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
sometimes I have to remind myself word count does not equal worth/quality
#bee blabs#tho it is hard when I see lengthy ass fics in comparison to my piddly ass ones#but brevity is the soul of wit right ?#I'd rather be brief and clear than windy and dribbly to the point where u miss the point#like I read some chapters of fics and it's so long and waffly and each interaction is filled with wildly similar descriptions#and no hate bc a lot of these fics have very good narratives#but it could have been said in less words ?#so maybe I don't have to feel so guilty over my fic being shorter#bc at least I've said what I wanted to without vying to string together filler words so my fic is longer#besides this cryptic castle fic is at 12k now halfway thru and that's more than I've written in ages for one work#and who knows what that word count will look like when I'm done#for me I'm proud of that as is#gonna remind myself of this post now and then#it might do me some good#besides !! my fics always feel better to me when I consider and meticulously craft each sentence I write
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
we need to bring back authors notes. for fic but also for formal writing. im working on my applications rn and i leave an incredible amount of comments throughout for both myself and person editing. most are not even questions theyre just like annotations of my own work "this technically isnt true heres what actually happened" "*explanation of how much my undergrad research PI sucked*" etc. sure these are things i should incorporate smoothly into the actual essay but also i think i should be able to say "A/N the preps will hate me for this!!!" etc in my personal statement
#when i realized i was spending more time putting explanations in my commemts than writing the respective section#i was like hmm maybe this is kinda a way im bouncing ideas off an audience#but also i will warn people reading my writing hey i leave a lot of comments on my own work read them or not theyre kinda for me kinda for u#ultimately tho i think authors notes of most forms are things that could be smoothly incorporated into the work#like on my ghost fic i lowkey wanna compile my comments into a bonus chap of thought processes and backstory#but also as i think thru the notes i had i realized they were things i shld just write into the story itself
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
part of my current weaving fantasia is definitely a delirious hope to identify a fiber art that produces items i like and which i can use to produce those items/use up yarn at a rate better than like, one year per object
#i knit so slowly nowadays and it's immensely frustrating but like. what am i going to do#NOT make a laceweight niebling shawl just because it will take me much longer to have a 'finished object'? it's so satisfying#to work on and think about!#but on the other hand. i would like to get through some yarn. and have made things. in addition to making things.#esp since i do drop projects that are actively hurting worse#in fact i think that's why im still not thru my current sock pair of 1 year; it's harder when im doing only in-the-round stockinette and no#switching to purl‚ now that i have a good rhythm in portuguese purling and can alternate wrists for right side and wrong side rows#box opener#now. i don't know that i will in fact weave faster. maybe i'll just spend a lot of time warping very slowly?#maybe im wrong about how fast weaving is?#but. yk. it could be!#weaving#knitting
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
-
#first time i start off the day crying in bed for an hour again in probably a few weeks now#guess i spoke too soon saying i was doing better OR. or maybe it's bc i met with my psych...and she sent me evil psychic waves to make me#feel more depressed again so she can put me on more meds. <- deranged line of thinking#:> anyway time for breakfast. i must bury these feelings in work again or die trying bc there's no other option.#upd: crying while im out of bed and trying to start my day is going to be a problem#i cant just show up to the function like hi im your prospective dogsitter. pay no mind to how puffy my eyes are#at least it's cold outside :/ that should help. woe water be upon me for now#anyway i have no time to be getting sick over this shit again lmao!! moveon.org#upd2: wow this is. bad#visibly put together enough i think to get thru this meeting with none the wiser but wow this feels exceptionally awful.#so exceptionally nauseously very god awful#actually maybe not visibly out together enough my eyes def still feel puffy. i should have iced them ughhhhhhhhh i hope it's cold enough to#be a cold compress substitute but im out here and well. it could be colder for sure. for sure it could be colder#and should be colder but we're living in the apocalypse so no more cold winters mild summers ever again. smiles.#upd3: mostly normal now
3 notes
·
View notes