#maybe Lawrence on the board is crying and throwing up

[awesome-cookies-and-cream]

Tags as per @mossterious

Oh Lawrence and Benitez being switchable at first glance is genius actually considering their opinions on being pope. But yeah queens stay on the same color square as them.

Tedesco being Queen and Tremblay being King is genius actually as Tremblay did pull the strings with simony and the deal with Adeyemi + Tedesco being the bigger and powerful threat as are queens in chess. (Also lmfao??? They didn't even castle? Was the queen in such a defensive it ended up there??? I can't even see the black rooks but black is at least a piece or two down lmfaooo)

Anyway good for you even without knowing chess. (Usually terrible pawns are those that aren't connected because they're easy to capture but connected, they can be difficult to break and limits your mobility. They're like the nuns! In a basic pov white's position is actually pretty good save for the undeveloped bishop at the back. Meanwhile Black is nawt playing good. How did u end up like that??? Double pawns on the f file, no center pawns, a white pawn on d6, an undeveloped Knight. AND the funniest thing is if Tremblay is the king, he didn't even care he's under attack. Black, get your shit together ahsjsksks)

Finally finished my Conclave art.

[themultifandomgal]

His Queen Pt7- Battle Of The Smithsonian

I wake up and throw the box lid off me

"Lawrence! Good to see you, lad!"

"Yeah, you too, Teddy"

"The Guardian of Brooklyn has returned!" I get out of my box and run to Ahk

"Hey, Ahk. Look, McPhee told me

what's going on around here. How can they separate you both? I had no idea"

"Indeed. A lot has transpired, Lawrence, since your last visit. One would say that..."

"Just..." Larrys phone rings

"Hey, Bocephus! Little help over here!" Larry puts his phone away and walks over to a smaller box, opening it up

"Hey, fellas. How you doing?"

"Well, lookee here. If it ain't Mr. Big-in-the-Britches himself, come back just in time to see us off"

"Yeah, Jed, I heard. Look, I don't even know how this happened" Larrys phone begins to ring again

"Yeah. Yeah, real mystery how this happened. Maybe the answer's on that magic buzzing box there in your hand!"

"Larry you weren't here. We lost our voice" I sadly say "we have no one to speak for us"

"None, none, dum-dum" the Easter island head says also sadly

Hey, guys! It's okay. I'll call the board in the morning, all right? I got some pull now. I'll handle this. We're gonna be okay here"

"We. Did you hear that? you hear Daydream Johnny? there ain't been a "we" ever since you put us on the "pay no mind" list. And that's a cold place to be, boy" we can all tell Jed is struggling the most with this

"Larry, what's done is done. Even the glory of Rome had to come to an end" Octavius looks off into the distance dramatically

"Would you please not look dramatically

off into the middle distance when you say that. It makes me feel worse"

"I don't know what you're talking about"

"Where are you looking? I'm over here"

"Just a bit of wall"

"Look, guys, maybe it won't be so bad"

"Larry if you'll excuse Ahk and I, but we would like to spend our last evening together, just the two of us" I take Ahk's hand and we head over to the Egyptology Department.

The evening ends way to quickly. If I could cry I would have tears running down my face

"I'm going to miss you Ahk" I stroke his face with my hand while stood next to my box

"And I will miss you my Queen. I love you Amunet"

"I love you Ahkmnerah fourth king of the fourth kings" we both laugh before I get into my box. I lay down and Ahk places a kiss on my forehead before closing my box. My eyes close and I'm asleep.

I wake up in my box. My mind goes straight to Ahkmenrah and how I will not see him tonight. Wait I'm awake? we aren't meant to be. I push the box off me and see Sacagawea. I help Dexter out of his

"Hey bud" he climbs on my shoulder and nuzzles  his head into my neck. I then see the tablet of Ahkmenrah in his crate

"Amunet, how are you?" Sacagawea asks

"Terrible. If we're to be apart I'd rather not wake up at all. Speaking of we aren't meant to be awake" I look at Dexter who looks down sad "I guess at least Ahk isn't feeling this pain right now"

"Where is it!" I hear someone yelling. A voice I recognise

"No"

"Amunet what is it? what's wrong?" Sacagawea asks

"It can't be" I look at my friend, fear ridden in my eyes "it's Kahmunrah. Ahk's older brother. He killed their parents, then when I was pregnant he killed my baby, I miscarried, then he killed me and then Ahk. He's evil. We must hide the tablet. Sacagawea take it, go" I hand her the tablet but before she can hide it Kahmunrah and his guards find us

"My beautiful Amunet. It's good to see you again, you look radiant as ever. Now I don't see your husband anywhere"

"Go to Duat" Kahmunrah tuts me as he places a hand around my neck

"Amunet"

"It's ok" I say to Sacagawea who looks terrified

"Guards hold her" he pushes me and I'm held back as he pushes my friends into a large containing unit. Before we know it we all freeze and go to sleep.

Next

Previous

[rosemaidenvixen]

A Secret’s Worth

Chapter 13: Jim

Ao3

Content warning: descriptions of raw meat, mentions of violence, toxic thought patterns.

“You know hon, you’re going to have to talk to Toby eventually.”

Jim jolted, smacking the top of his head against the underside of the cabinet, it didn’t hurt in the slightest, but the loud crunch as he made contact did not bode well for the cabinet.

Barbara winced and set her coffee mug down on the table “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you,”

Jim pulled back and stood up straight, grimacing when he caught sight of the broken boards and deep gouges his horns had left in the wood. They were going to have to hire someone to come in and fix that “It’s ok,”

“I’m just...concerned, if you two are having problems things aren’t going to get better unless you both address them,”

“Yeah, I know,”

He regretted the flippant words as soon as he said them, getting a glimpse of the look of hurt and worry on his mom’s face.

 “Can you tell me why you guys are fighting?” she said softly

Jim looked away, turning his eyes back down to his...food on the counter “It’s complicated,” 

It didn’t look like that answer satisfied Barbara at all, but rather than push further she just frowned and went back to her breakfast.

Jim felt bad for being so evasive, but that was vastly overshadowed by just how relieved he was that she was willing to drop it. He finished grabbing the empty jars and frozen plastic wrapped rabbit and headed over to the table to join her. Eating this close to sunrise usually gave him wicked stomach cramps, but he’d put it off for too long already, and he was too hungry to wait another hour and a half to eat a normal breakfast.

So he didn’t waste any time downing all the jars and getting started on the rabbit.

“Are just you and Toby having problems, or does this involve the girls to?”

Jim froze mid bite, a fresh wave of guilt and anxiety crashing into him. The hand holding the half eaten rabbit dropped down to the table. He hung his head, the weight of his horns tugging it down even further. Even without looking he could practically feel the hurt on his mom’s face, which made him feel even worse.

“I’m sorry, I know I’m prying, but I’m worried about you,”

He heard her setting down her fork and clasping her hands together “I don’t want you to feel like you have to tell me everything that goes on with you and your friends, but…” 

Barbara sighed “I was young once to. I know how high emotions can run, and how the littlest things seem to matter so much-- but they aren’t worth throwing your friendships away,”

Jim risked raising his head to look at her better. Briefly meeting her eyes and getting a peek of her melancholy smile.

As soon as she caught sight of him, Barbara sat up a little straighter and continued, emboldened by the eye contact “If you did something wrong, and I’m not saying you did, avoiding them won’t make it go away. Things can’t get better if you don’t apologize and start rebuilding trust. And if one of them did something to upset you…”

She paused, pulling in a deep breath “Then you have every right to feel hurt and angry, but you need to tell them that. Your friends can’t read your mind, you need to communicate how you’re feeling with them,”

Expectant silence filled the air, Barbara’s gaze stayed on him, patiently waiting for his response.

Jim forced himself to maintain eye contact, very deliberately did not ball his hands into fists, and only opened his mouth to speak once he was sure he could do it in a neutral tone of voice “You’re right...I’ll try to talk to them at lunch today, see if we can clear the air”

Whether she actually believed him or saw the cracks in his facade and decided not to push him further, Barbara’s only response was to smile, give a soft ‘I think that’s a great idea’, and go back to eating.

Which made him feel ten times worse about the fact that he intended to do no such thing.

He looked back down at the rabbit in his hand, stomach in knots. Even though it was the absolute last thing he felt like doing, Jim lifted the rabbit back up and forced himself to take another bite.

When you mess up you need to apologize, when your friends mess up you need to let them know that they hurt you.

But what do you do when it’s both of those things? Or maybe even neither?

He knew his mom was only trying to help, but this was way out of her league.

Jim wasn’t trying to keep secrets or shut her out. But Toby and the girls were straight up accusing her of abuse. How could telling her do anything but hurt her? 

They had threatened to send her to prison for crying out loud.

And maybe he was wrong or maybe they were, but bottom line, Jim couldn’t tell Toby and the girls the truth.

If this was how they reacted to just some scratches on a door...he couldn’t risk it.

He swallowed and glanced at what was left of the rabbit through the plastic, butchered and cleaned but still very clearly a rabbit, the ends he’d been chewing on bright red and bloody.

There was a monster here all right, but it wasn’t his mom.

Jim forced down the last of the macabre excuse of what passed for his breakfast and hurried back into the kitchen to start on their lunches. When it was time for Barbara to leave she kissed him on the cheek and thanked him before heading out the door.

And didn’t say anything about the fact he’d just made two instead of three, even though he knew she’d noticed.

He did his best to avoid thinking about it; but before he knew it the sun was up, he was normal again, and it was time to leave for school.

Jim sluggishly changed out of his now baggy t-shirt and jeans into his regular clothes, threw his messenger bag over his shoulder, and forced himself out the door, making a bee line for his bike. It didn’t look like Toby was waiting around to ambush him. But Jim didn’t want to give any openings just in case he was hiding in the bushes, which he’d tried a few days ago.

Fortunately that didn’t happen, and Jim was able to start pedaling to school in peace.

As glad as he was about being about to get to school without having to dodge a confrontation, Jim had definitely been taking Toby’s presence on their morning ride for granted. Less than two weeks and he already couldn’t stand the silence.

But as much as it sucked that’s just the way things had to be now.

All too soon he pulled up to the school. Jim headed around the building towards the bike rack, not one of the ones he and Toby liked to use, but the one near the gym that Steve and his cronies frequented. Hopefully they’d already gone in and Jim could avoid running into them directly.

His heart sank when he pulled up and saw Steve and Logan chatting by the end of the rack. So much for avoiding confrontation. Trying to be as discreet as possible, Jim quietly dismounted and started locking in his bike on the opposite side of the rack from them, praying to go unnoticed.

Unfortunately he wasn’t that lucky.

“Hey! What do you think you’re doing, parking your dweeby bike next to ours?” Steve stomped over, a snickering Logan right on his heels.

Jim slammed his lock shut, what little remained of his patience gone “I thought that when people saw my lame bike next to your cool one it would make yours look better by comparison,” he said in a complete deadpan.

Steve’s face blanked as he faltered, unable to come up with a response. Jim tried to take advantage of the lull to get away, but he wasn’t quick enough. Steve stepped in front of him and snarled, looming in his personal space to block his exit. 

“You’d better tell me what your game is!”

Jim met Steve’s gaze without flinching, normally he wouldn’t try to butt heads with a guy who was called ‘Psycho Steve’ for darn good reason, but after everything he’d been through in the past week and a half Jim couldn’t be bothered to tip toe around him right now “Figure it out yourself Steve, because believe it or not I have bigger problems than your microscopic IQ,”

In hindsight that had probably been the worst thing he could have said. Steve’s face darkened, arm shooting out and grabbing Jim’s collar. 

Logan, still hovering behind him, let out a short laugh “Wrong answer Lake,” he said with a smirk.

Steve didn’t say anything, slowly raising his other hand in a fist. Jim winced preemptively and tried to brace himself for the coming blow.

But just before Steve could start rearranging his teeth, Coach Lawrence poked his head out of the gym door, causing all three of them to jump in surprise “Class starts in five minutes, everyone cut the chit chat and get in here!”

He snapped his head in their direction “Kish, Palchuk, that means you!”

Steve growled, but dropped his fist. The second Coach ducked back inside he shoved Jim into the bike rack before stomping towards the gym.

“This isn’t over Crybaby,”

He stalked off, Logan following shortly after. 

Jim glowered at Steve’s retreating back before pulling himself up and heading to his own class.

Getting teeth pulled was more fun than spending any time within a ten foot radius of Steve, but it was still better than the burning, queasy feeling he got in his gut whenever Toby, Claire, Mary, or Darci looked at him.

He breathed deeply and tried to force the sudden spike of stress down to a manageable level, Jim knew they meant well, he really did, and he knew all this stuff with curfews and scratched doors was scaring them, but he couldn’t tell them. 

Last week had been the closest he’d ever come to spilling the beans, when Toby had jumped him in the bathroom, begging Jim to tell him the truth, promising he wouldn’t go to the cops, Jim had almost done it. He had been so close to just unloading and telling Toby everything. But at the last second he’d bolted. Later once he’d had time to sit down and really think about what had just happened, he’d been really glad that he didn’t.

No matter how much Toby and the girls begged and demanded and insisted Jim could trust them with the truth, the fact was he just couldn’t, no matter how much he did or didn’t want to.

He fumbled with dial in an effort to open his locker.

Jim was a monster, and worse a liar. If the girls ever figured out what he really was...well they wouldn’t run screaming in terror that’s for sure. Maybe Darci would, but chances are she’d be helping Claire decapitate him while Mary filmed the whole thing. And Toby…

His throat tightened unexpectedly, struggling to grab his textbooks as his hands started to shake. That was the worst part, deep down he just didn’t know how Toby would react. Would he be crushed by the knowledge that his ‘best friend’ had never been what he’d seemed? Horrified that he’d never spotted the monster living across the street from him? Furious that Jim had lied to him for over a decade?

Knowing Jim’s luck it would be some unholy combination of all three.

Shutting his locker with much more force than needed, he turned down the hall towards Señor Uhl’s room.

So telling the truth was off the table, but the four of them had made it clear that they weren’t going to let this go any time soon. And they still had the pictures, and the recording Mary made.

Jim had been on edge for days after they’d first confronted him. Terrified that they’d gone ahead to the police with their evidence, and at any moment cops bust open the door and drag his mom away in handcuffs.

But a few days passed without incident, aside from hundreds of texts from all four of them, not an exaggeration, literally hundreds, Jim had slowly allowed himself to relax.

That and the fact that they were still badgering him told Jim that they needed more than just the photos and the audio to go to the police with, they needed him to. And if he didn’t go along with them there was nothing they could do to his mom.

Of course that didn’t explain why his phone had been disturbingly silent for the past two days.

He shook off the worries, Jim had more than enough of those right now, the last thing he needed was to go inventing more. If his friends had realized they couldn’t get him to say anything well then good for them. The important thing was for Jim to stay silent and not respond to their prying, in person or over the phone. As a long term solution it sucked, but he wasn’t about to get better alternatives any time soon.

His stomach was constantly in knots and it felt like he was walking on eggshells 24/7, but he couldn’t take the risk of dropping his guard even a little.

Jim rounded the corner only to freeze midstep. Two people were standing on the other end of the hall quietly chatting with each other. But not just any two people; Toby and Mary. And at the sound of his footsteps their gazes swiveled towards him, piercing him on the spot.

His heart rate tripled.

Ok, no big deal, looks like he was taking the long way to spanish today. 

Heart still going a mile a minute, Jim pivoted on his heel, stopping dead when he saw Claire and Darci in the hall behind him, blocking any escape.

Two might be a coincidence, but four? No way. This was an ambush, how long had they been planning this?

Now that he was pinned from either side, they started walking towards him.

Yep, definitely an ambush.

Jim tightened his grip on the strap of his bag. Stay calm, they might have cornered him but they couldn’t make him talk. And if he didn’t talk they couldn’t get anything that they could use to press charges against his mom. The five of them couldn’t stay here in the hall forever, sooner or later a teacher would come by to shuffle them all off to their classes. All Jim needed to do was stay quiet and wait them out.

The four stopped their approach at about three feet away. Jim braced himself, getting ready for the onslaught of begging and accusations.

Toby stepped up to him, breaking the silence “Jim, you don’t have to say anything, I-- we just need to tell you…” he dropped his gaze “We’re sorry, I’m sorry,”

Jim’s jaw dropped.

He what?

There were no words any one of them could have said that would have floored him more. He wondered if he’d actually heard Toby correctly. Right now Jim was too stunned to even react.

“All of us are,” Claire chimed in “We shouldn’t have pushed so hard, especially after you told us we were wrong,”

For over a week Jim had been hoping against hope for them to just drop this and back off, but now that that was, apparently, happening it almost didn’t seem real. If it weren’t for the fact that the school wasn’t made of gingerbread and he still had his pants on Jim would’ve thought that he was dreaming “I-- you-- you what?”

Darci looked nervously from side to side “Can we take this into the computer lab?” she gestured to the door off to the side “Somewhere a little more private than the hallway?”

“Uh...ok,”

They all stepped into the unoccupied room, Darci flicking on the lights and Toby pulling the door shut behind them.

Meanwhile the shock had subsided and suspicion was starting to creep in.

Did they really want to let this go, or were they just trying to get him to drop his guard?

 Jim leaned against one of the desks in a way that he hoped came off as casual “So…what exactly is it you guys are saying?”

Toby grimaced “We shouldn’t have kept forcing the issue of the whole basement thing and your curfew the way we did, if you say everything with you and Dr. Lake is cool….we believe you,”

Jim slowly turned to look each of them in the eye, trying to spot any traces of nervousness or dishonesty “Are you guys for real on this?”

“Yeah,” Darci stepped forward “This is your family, as soon as you said everything was fine we should have just butted out,”

Claire came up beside her “That goes for all of us, we’re really sorry we pushed it too far and made you uncomfortable,”

Jim didn’t quite know what to think, on one hand this was exactly what he’d dreamed of happening for over a week, but on the other...there was one person here who hadn’t said anything yet, who was known for having a stubborn streak powerful enough to crush diamonds.

He turned towards Mary, not even trying to hide the distrust on his face “Then what about the recording you made?”

In the second biggest twist of the day, Jim was taken aback to see that Mary actually looked genuinely...remorseful “I lied, I didn’t record anything,” she came up to him and plopped her phone into his hand “Check for yourself, and you can go ahead and delete the pictures of the….racoon scratches,”

Her voice dropped “And I’m sorry to…” 

Jim heard her apology, but for the most part he was preoccupied with the device in his hand. To be honest he’d been starting to think this all sounded too good to be true; but if Mary was actually letting him go through her phone--

He still couldn’t believe he was holding it, it was like being handed the holy grail, only somehow more sacred.

Only about a minute or so of browsing through her phone and Jim knew Mary was telling the truth, the photos of the scratched door were there, she hadn’t sent them to anyone. And there was no audio recording in her main files or her autobackup. 

A tiny part of Jim was ticked that she’d tried to trick him using an imaginary recording, but that was eclipsed by the enormous relief he felt that the damning words he’d said had never been captured in the first place. 

It was like a massive weight being lifted off his shoulders as Jim permanently deleted the photos of the basement door. After handing the phone back he looked around at everyone, torn between his remaining doubts and giddiness at the idea that this may be over after all.

“So you guys are really going to stop bugging me about my curfew and rules and everything?”

They all nodded.

“Yep,”

“Absolutely,”

“One hundred percent,”

Toby came up to him and put a hand on his shoulder, smiling wide “At lunch today what do you say we meet up at the food truck, figure out what we’re going to do over spring break, and forget all this ever happened?”

A tiny smile of his own curled on Jim’s face “Sounds great,”

They all filled out of the computer lab, Jim was last, flicking off the light switch as they left, actually relaxed for the first time in weeks.

Against all odds Toby and the girls had actually decided to let it go.

Jim felt so light he was practically walking on air. It was over. This horrible, screwed up mess was finally over. His secret was safe, his mom was safe. He wouldn’t have to spend every day swinging back and forth between anxiety and crippling loneliness. Jim could actually talk to his friends again, go back to actually having a life.

For the first time in a long time things were looking up.

[achillestiel]

THE PARENT TRAP ONLY WORKS IF YOU’RE IDENTICAL | PART EIGHT | AO3 LINK

Tag List: @littlerachelbee @imthedoctorlove @deancas-handprint @castiel-loves-dean @wanderermatthews @thelahatiel @priscillahc @mridzyp @multi-fandom-dark-lord @thefantasyfiend @harmonyhelms @imlivingliferightnow @kara-merlin @still-clowning-in-this-house @never-forever-more @continuezmesfilserrants @2musiclover2 @castiels-bitch @stjimmie @cmths5 @chamomilecas @syrille

Eight Months Later

“Ok. From the very top, tell me what exactly happened.” Cas said, sliding his phone into the clip-in phone holder his assistant Hannah had given him at Christmas. On the screen, his former ex-husband grinned sheepishly. “Don’t smile at me like that Dean, it won’t work.” Cas added. 

“In Claire’s defence, she didn’t start it.” Dean said. “Which is a phrase I never thought I would say.” he added when he saw Cas’ disbelieving look. “Some seniors pushed Jack over during lunch. Kaia saw the whole thing, tried to stop them but they wouldn’t leave him alone so she grabbed Claire and Alex. Claire punched the tallest of them in the face, which is actually pretty impressive when you think about it because the kid is probably a foot taller than Claire.”

“Dean, she’s been suspended for a week.” Cas said, stifling a groan as Hannah placed a mug of decaf green tea in front of him. “Suspended Dean. I get why she did it 

“It’s fine. She’s going to work in the shop with me and now every kid at school knows not to mess with the Winchester-Novak twins. Hey Hannah, tell him to stop stressing.”

“Stop being so stressed out.” Hannah said to Cas. “You’ll be on a plane home in just a few short hours. I’ve completely cleared your schedule until tuesday so you can have a nice weekend with Dean and the kids. Stop with the stress.”

“Listen to Hannah, she’s smart.” Dean said. Hannah shot Dean a thankful smile as she walked back to her desk. “She’s right, you’ll be home soon and we’ve got the whole weekend together.” Dean added. 

“I can’t wait, this week has really dragged.”

“Well the whole gang and I will be picking you up from the airport before you know it.” Dean said, his whole face lighting up when he smiled at Cas. “I better go and make sure Claire isn’t doing like setting the kitchen on fire out of boredom. I love you Cas, can’t wait to see you.”

“I love you too Dean, I’ll see you this evening.” Cas said, hanging up and resting his hand in his hands. 

“Oh God, are you stressing out again?” Hannah asked, her head popping up from her desk. “Cas, you know that Dean loves you. He’s not going to say no.”

“Do you think it’s too soon to be asking him to marry me?”

“Weren’t you two married already? He’s not going to say no.” Hannah said, rolling her eyes. “Please just drink your green tea and calm down.” she added, returning to her work and occasionally muttering under her breath. 

The past eight months had been a whirlwind of change for everyone. After a lengthy discussion it was decided that Cas and Jack would move to Kansas. The house in Washington was sold so they could buy a larger property in Lawrence. During the week Cas stayed in Washington in an apartment not far from his office and flew home on the weekends. It wasn’t the best of situations but for now, they were making it work.

In the words of Claire Winchester, Dean was ‘spiralling’. He had been sitting in his bedroom for thirty minutes just staring at the wall. He wasn’t going to talk about the forty minutes he had spent before that pacing back and forth, occasionally flinging himself on the bed before resuming his pacing. 

“Told you, he’s doing it again.” Claire said from the doorway. 

“Yeah, you were right. He’s spiralling.” Jack intoned, standing next to her and eating a bowl of dry Cookie Crunch cereal with his fingers. 

“I can hear both of you and Jack, stop eating. You’ll ruin dinner.” Dean said, finally ripping his eyes away from the wall. “And I’m not spiralling.”

“You are.” The twin said at the same time. “You and Pops really are perfect for each other.” Claire added. “You need to stop wigging out, it’s going to be fine.” 

“I don’t want it to just be fine Claire, I want it to be great.” Dean said. Claire rolled her eyes as she grabbed a handful of dry cereal out of the bowl in Jack’s hand. “Will you two please stop eating? We’ll be going to grab Cas in half an hour.” 

“So maybe it’s time to get up off the bed, get dressed and nut up Winchester.” Claire said. At that comment Dean looked over and glared at her. “What? It’s just a suggestion. We don’t know why you’re freaking out so much.”

“Yeah, all you’re doing is asking dad to marry you...again.” Jack said. “Why are you worried?”

“Scared he’ll say no?” Claire asked with a snort. Once again Dean just glared at her. “God, I think I preferred it when you used to cry over cowboy films.” She added, grabbing a handful of cereal and swiftly exiting the room. “Just man up!” she added loudly as she stomped down the hall. 

“She might have a point, dad. Please don’t ground me for agreeing with Claire.” Jack said quickly. 

Several hours later Dean, Claire, Jack, Sam and Eileen were all standing in the arrival lounge waiting for Cas to appear. Dean’s heart was hammering violently against his chest and he’d already thrown up twice. Claire and Jack held up a sign saying ‘Welcome Home Pops’. It was a bit frayed and battered as it was the same sign they brought with everytime they picked up Cas from the airport but it had become something of a family tradition. While Dean bounced nervously from foot to foot, Eileen rubbed soothingly on his back. 

“It’ll be great Dean, stop freaking out.” She said. 

I think I’m going to throw up again Dean signed to her. 

“You’re not going to throw up. Just calm the f...hell down.” Sam said with a roll of his eyes. “At least you’re sober this time and not on a boat.”

“Please don’t talk about the boat, I’m trying really hard to not throw up right now.” Dean muttered. He focused on breathing and out, all the while keeping an eye on the arrivals board. Cas’ plane had landed ten minutes prior. He’d be here any-

“There he is!” Claire called out, waving her free hand frantically. Dean’s head snapped from the board to where Cas was walking towards them, a huge smile on his face when he saw everyone. Before he had time to freak out even more so, Dean hurried over to Cas and threw his arms around him. All the while thankful to Eileen for shoving several pieces of gum in his hand after he’d finished throwing up. 

“God I’ve missed you.” Cas said as he hugged Dean. “Are you ok? You look a bit pale.”

“I’m fine. Fine.” Dean said quickly. “I’ve just really missed you too. Look, the whole rabble his here!” he added, guiding Cas over to where the others were waiting for him. Claire and Jack raced over, hugging their dads tightly as Eileen and Sam grinned. Sneakily, Sam was already video calling Gabriel so he could witness what was about to happen. 

“I can’t wait to get home and just spend the whole weekend with you all.” Cas said. “Shall we head back, grab some dinner? Sam, Eileen do you want to join us?”

“Hold up Cas...there’s something I need to do first.” Dean said, he needed to do this now before he chickened out completely. Covertly, Claire pulled her phone out and started to record.

“What’s going on?” Cas asked, his brow furrowing. 

“Um...Cas, I love you. I know that it’s been a real crazy couple of months. Especially with Team Parent Trap and their crazy plans but I love you. I loved you when we first met and I love you even more now.” Dean stammered out, coughing ever so slightly with nerves. “So Cas...um…” Dean said as he lowered down onto one knee. 

“Dean, are you trying to propose right now in the middle of an airport?” Cas asked. Dean stared up at him with a terrified look on his face. 

“Oh god, it’s too soon isn’t it? That’s what you’re going to say. It’s too soon and you spend your weeks in Washington and-”

“Dean Winchester, of course I want to marry you, you idiot.” Cas said, sighing with exasperation. “That’s why I was going to propose...tonight...at dinner.”

“Wow...and you called us morons for switching places.” Jack said while Claire just howled with laughter. 

“Wait.” Dean said. He was still down on one knee, now just looking up at Cas with a bewildered expression. “You were planning on proposing tonight?”

“Yes Dean, I was.” Cas said, the corner of his mouth twitching with a smile.

“You know, maybe you two should have actually talked about this before. This probably wouldn’t be happening.” Sam suggested. Next to him Eileen was having to hold her side while she laughed.

“Oh yeah, and ruin a surprise engagement Sammy. Dumbass.” Dean shot over to his brother. 

“This is amazing.” Claire said, holding up her phone. “I’m so glad I’m filming this car crash. This is going on TikTok.”

“Ok I’m getting up now.” Dean said with a laugh as Cas held out a hand to help him up. “I can’t believe how badly this is going.” He added with a shake of his head. “Cas, I know this really hasn’t been too long and we saw each other again because our kids were idiots-”

“Hey!” Claire and Jack yelled out. 

“Shut up, I’m trying to propose here! Castiel Novak, will you marry me? Again”

“Yes, yes I will. Dean Winchester, will you marry me again?”

“Sure, go on then.” Dean said with a grin. He pulled Cas in for a kiss as several onlookers clapped and cheered. “As badly as this went it was still better than the first proposal.”

“Let’s try and not have any more ok? It’s just you and me, now and forever.”

“Hey!” Claire and Jack yelled for the second time. 

“Ok, just you, me and the kids. Forever.”

“I don’t know Cas, forever is a really long.”

“Dean Winchester, you infuriate me.” Cas said with a groan. Dean just laughed and pulled him for yet another kiss. 

“Yeah but you love me.”

“I do...I really do.”

[dailydaydreamings]

Best in the Worst Way, Part 8

The Reader has been having a love affair with two Avengers and gets caught in a sticky situation. She’s suddenly faced with life decisions she’s not prepared for, including who to love, what she wants, and is this all worth it?

The very first thing you did after opening the package was to throw it into a drawer. Wrapping and all.

It would have been the sweetest gift had it come from Bucky. Coming from Steve, it made you feel a little queasy.

The rest of the morning you stated vaguely at your screen, mulling over your relationships. When Steve finally knocked on your door, you barely managed, “Come in.”

“Hey,” he greeted. You nodded in acknowledgment, folding your hands in front on you on the desk. “Did you get my gift?” He handed you your tea, clearly looking for the frame.

You swallowed the lump that had formed in your throat. “Steve sit,” you motioned at a chair.

Frowning, he did as he was told.

“I did see it, the thing is Steve, it feels a little wrong to put it on my desk,” you admitted.

His reaction was immediate, complete confusion and utter bewilderment, “Why.”

You could feel a burning sensation in the back of your throat as you started, quite hoarsely, “We’re not together anymore, Steve.”

He threw his hands in the air, “And I can’t declare that I love my children.”

You pursed your lips, trying to compose yourself. “Yet, I would still have to look at it everyday. And it was clearly meant for me.”

He stood, pacing in front of you, “Is it so wrong that I still love you.”

You closed your eyes at his admission, trying to get control of yourself. You felt a tear slide down your face and you quickly brushed it away.

“You still love me too,” he crooned.

You opened your eyes, he stood in front of you, with his hands braced on the back of the chair.

“I do,” you said as another tear leaked down your cheek. “But I’m crying because I’m carrying two babies inside of me who are fucking with my hormones and I feel like I’m losing control. It’s been over for us since you walked out when I told you I’m pregnant.”

You kept a cool head, despite the tears now freely streaming down your face. Fuck Steve. How dare he make you cry.

He looked so hurt by your admission, like he was closing into himself, trying to make himself smaller.

You squared your jaw, grabbing for a pen to fiddle with. “Need I remind you that you told me to get an abortion after I’d already started picking names for my children, which would cause me to have to pick between you and Bucky? That I didn’t want to pick, but you forced my hand so I chose. And I didn’t pick you.”

He flinched at your words, before whispering, “But I changed my mind, y/n.”

You snapped the pen in half and stood.

“You walked out when I told you about your children, and then didn’t speak to us for weeks. You got into a fist fight with Bucky. You told me to get an abortion. You’ve been nothing but cold with Bucky and flirty with me. You still want me to pick you, but the only your getting back on my life is by making things right with him so we can all be together again. Get the fuck out of my office.”

He blinked in surprise, but didn’t say anything as he left. He didn’t even look back. Weeks of pent up emotion had come up all at once and you were a sobbing mess on your office floor.

You managed to text Tony that you were going home early and Bucky to ask him to drive you home.

The next two weeks passed in a blur. You and Bucky had started prepping the apartment for the babies and you’d been extremely tired.

At 15 weeks, Bucky was so excited to tell you the babies were the size of apples. Doctor Lawrence told you they were definitely bigger than apples, as developed as 15 week fetuses, but just bigger.

You were starting to show too in tighter clothing. Not a lot, but enough.

Enough that when you looked in the mirror and cradled your belly, it was all so much more real. There’s so much more to do before they come, and then, you need to care for them, somehow.

Steve had stopped meeting you at the entrance in the morning and evening, and bringing you tea. The only time you saw him was in passing and at your ultrasound. At the latter, he didn’t say a single word, and left as soon as it was over.

You felt terribly, of course, but you tried to remind yourself it was for the best.

Everything changed the day you walked into the building and directly across from your office was a giant chalkboard. You and Bucky frowned at each other in confusion before walking up to Tony who had a piece of chalk in his hand.

“What’s this?” You asked, but you very quickly realized what it was.

“A little betting poll,” Tony said.

Indeed.

In swirling text it said, Guess the Sex. Below that, there were three columns: Two Boys; One of Each; Two Girls. Below each header was room for one to write their name and the amount they were betting.

Tony had written his name under two boys for fifty thousand dollars.

Steve had also participated it seemed and had written him name under Two Girls for two hundred dollars.

“Are you fucking kidding me Tony?” You asked, gesturing to the absurd amount of money.

“I’m trying to get people to play,” he threw up his hands in the air. “Besides, I have a feeling.”

You rolled your eyes.

Bucky took the chalk from Tony, “Well so do I,” he said, writing his name under One of Each for five hundred.

You snatched the chalk from him and said, “You’re wrong.” You put your own name down under Two Boys for a thousand. “It would only be my luck to have a house filled with boys.”

Tony laughed, “Thank you, mama!” He held out his hand for a high five, which you obliged. “You are finding out the sex, right?”

You looked at Bucky and he shrugged. You looked back at Tony and said, “Maybe.”

His protests followed you as you walked into your office, and then the fun began.

Naturally, Natasha came by your office first. She took one look at the wall and wrote her name under Two Girls. She strutted into your office and demanded to know when you’d know the sex.

You laughed, leaning back in your chair, “I don’t know, Nat. I had my last ultrasound yesterday and I don’t even know if I want to know.”

She shook her head and declared, “You want to know.” Before promptly leaving your office.

Bruce was next. He came into ask you for something, and took a seat in front of you. “So how are you feeling?”

You smiled, “Pregnant.”

He laughed, “I’m honestly surprised we’re having this conversation.”

You bit your lip, so we’re you. A year ago, this would have been the last predicament you saw yourself in.

“But it’s good!” Bruce assured you. “Babies are natural.”

You laughed. “I’m actually really excited, Bruce. I wasn’t. But I am now.”

“That’s really good,” he grinned. “You know I saw this documentary about monitoring babies development after birth until a year and I —”

“Bruce,” you interrupted, “I love you, but no. Definitely no.”

“Right!” He stood up. “Of course not. It’s not even my area of expertise.”

You chucked as he turned towards the door and jumped in surprise at the chalk board.

“Oh!” He exclaimed. “When did this get here?”

“This morning,” you called after him.

He examined it for a moment before writing his name under Two Boys.

The rest of the day went by with various coworkers stopping by to write their names on the board. Most were either for two boys or one of each. Tony’s large bet was certainly getting people to play.

Clint walked by around the time you were packing up, a sucker in his mouth.

“Nice Tony,” he said, picking up the chalk and writing his name under Two Girls.

“You seriously think I’m having two girls?” You asked coming up beside him to look at the board.

“God no,” he said. “I think you’re having two boys. But there’s less people over here, bigger pay out if I’m somehow right.”

You blinked in surprised. He wasn’t wrong there was only 5 names unde Two Girls for the fourteen on the board. He’s stand to make large amount of money if he was right.

———

“So two boys?” Bucky asked as he made dinner and you sat on the counter.

“I have no doubt in my mind,” you said as you scrolled through Pinterest on your tablet for baby room ideas.

“But don’t you want a girl?” He asked.

You nodded, “But I have a feeling we’re having two boys.”

He paused, as if in thought. “I think we’re having at least one boy. I’m kinda scared of having a boy though,” he admitted.

You frowned, putting your tablet down, “Why?”

He shrugged, “I know girls are tough but there’s something that is so scary to me about a boy taking after me.”

You stroked your belly abscent mindedly, “I hope they take after you, Buck.”

He sighed, “I know none of it was my fault, I try to tell myself that everyday. But babe, what I can do...”

You hopped off the counter and came to wrap your arms around his waist. It had been a long journey with him. When you’d first come to work for the Avengers, one of the first things you’d done was to book Bucky’s first therapy session.

Nightmares and bad days had followed, as well as two years and counting for struggling to find the right doses of medications. That at least was getting better, right after you’d started sleeping together he was out on a particularly nasty dosage that made him both violent and quick to anger.

It didn’t change that he was the best man you knew.

“The babies will be so lucky to have you,” you murmured. “To teach them, to love them, to protect them. They’ll take after you, but only in good ways. So you better get used to thinking about two boys taking after you because there’s gonna be two of them.”

He laughed, leaning over to kiss the top of your head. “You’re so sure.”

“Yep.” You pecked his lips. “Finish this, I’m starving.”

He laughed, “What do you want to do tonight?”

“Survivors on tonight,” you suggested, pulling out plates to set the table.

“Good choice,” he said.

You were just getting ready to sit down when Bucky’s phone rang. You didn’t complain as he picked it up and said, “It’s Steve.”

Pursing your lips, you picked up your own phone. Sure enough, Tony had texted: Barnes and Rogers are being sent on an assignment. Sorry :/ Come over if you’re lonely?

“It’s for work,” you said. “Pick up.” Because you still weren’t sure if he would.

He rolled his eyes and left the room. You picked at your dinner as you texted Tony back, Picking out furniture for the babies’ room and watching Survivor. My schedule is packed. Thanks though.

He texted back right away: Tomorrow night you’re coming for dinner then. And then, Odds they kill each other?

You smirked and replied with, 100% How long are they gone?

“I have to be gone for at least a week,” Bucky said coming back into the room. “Maybe more.”

You frowned. “Where are you going?”

“Didn’t say,” he pulled a takeout container from the cupboard for his dinner. “He’s picking me up in five and he’ll fill me in. He said to pack for the cold, whatever that means.”

You sighed. “Ok so I’ll make sure my next ultrasound is scheduled for when you get back.”

He shook his head, walking towards the bedroom. You followed. “Don’t skip one because I’m not here. We need to make sure they’re doing okay.”

You knew he was right, but for him to miss it...

You sat on the bed as you watched him pack, “Please don’t get into any fights with Steve while you’re out there.”

He rolled his eyes scooping clothes into his bag, “It’s not me you have to worry about.”

You pursed your lips, you weren’t so sure about that.

He saw your worried expression and came over to peck your lips. “It’ll all be fine, I promise. We’ll go, and when I get back, we’ll paint the babies rooms and you’ll have your baby shower,” he brushed a strand of hair behind your ear. “And everything will be fine.”

You weren’t too worried about the mission. Him and Steve killing each other was another story.

You still forced a smile into your face and kissed him properly. Both arms wrapping around his neck, kissing him like you needed it to breathe.

He chuckled, breaking free, “I can feel my phone buzzing, Steve’s here.”

You groaned but still followed him out the door. Steve was parked outside and raised a hand to wave as you walked out.

Bucky put his bag in the trunk and wrapped his arms around you, “A week.”

You nodded, “One week.”

He kissed you again, “You take care of my babies.”

You smiled, “Stay safe baby. I love you.”

He nodded, kissing you one more time. With so much fire and passion you wanted to take him back to bed. But you just kissed back harder and when he broke it, you let him go.

The window was open as he climbed into the car, you leaned forward, looking Steve dead in the eye as you said, “I don’t care if you two have issues, you take care of each other and you both come home safe.”

Because the reality was, it didn’t matter if they hated or loved each other. All you cared about was that they came home safe.

Tags (are open!)

@booktease21 @sexyvixen7 @just-the-hiddles @fading-mentality-bouquet @a--1--1--3 @broco8 @yougottalovefandoms @hailqueenconquer @tazzi-baby @imaginebeinlovedbyme @amiets2 @prettyblueskylark

[meikodenji]

CODA

Part: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6:

Right Here

Proteins bars? Some homeless-looking guy giving you a hard time? And he busts karate on you? Huh.

Johnny was filling out a form in the office while the teens clean up around the dojo. As Miguel washed the window of the small room, he questioned, "Hey, Sensei, is there any particular way you want us to clean?" "No, I don't give a shit. Whatever's easiest. " He finished up. "You know what? You two go clean the restroom and we'll call it a night." "Okay. C'mon, Joey." "Right behind you.

The blonde smiled, "And do that one on your hands and knees." He chuckled, the boys going straight to work.

Daniel made his way into the dojo. He kept a hard gaze on the cobra right by the doors. Unknowingly, Johnny greets the person, "Welcome to Cobra Kai."

"Somethings never change." LaRusso threw. Johnny stood at his end, "yeah, what are you talking about?" "I heard you beat up a bunch of teenagers in that parking lot." He pointed. "Oh, that." Lawrence said in his defense. "No. I didn't beat up any teenagers." The blonde slowly made his way into the middle of the mat, closer to LaRusso. "I kicked the shit out of a bunch of assholes who deserved it." The brunette scoffed at him. "Wow. Johnny Lawrence calling someone else an asshole. That's rich, man." "What's that supposed to mean?" "Look. I'm not here to rehash the past. Just stay away from my daughter's friends." "Your daughter's friends?" Johnny bit back a smile. "Yeah, that makes sense. Nice company she keeps." "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" "It means those friends of hers were wailing on a kid half their size." All true. "Maybe you don't know your daughter as well as you think you do. Get your house in order, LaRusso." Daniel quickly made his way to his rival. "Who the hell you think you're talking to?" At that moment, Byers and Diaz came out of a clean bathroom. "Bathroom's clean!" Miguel shouted. "Is there anything else you need us to do?" Johnny stopped them The boys were baffled at the sight of their Sensei and Daniel. They apologized, "Sorry, Sensei." "Sensei? Really?" Daniel said, unbelievably. He felt like the boy who stood beside Miguel, looked rather familiar. "Oh my God, kids, I don't know what he's told you but you shouldn't believe a word he says, or you're gonna end up exactly like him." He turned to Johnny. "You and I. This. We aren't done." He went to exit the dojo. Johnny put his arms up. "I'm right here, man." The other man scoffed, brushing him off. J: "Sorry if we interrupted anything, Sensei." M: "20 push ups on our knuckles?" He kept his eyes on the man in his car, chuckling at the boy's question. "Right. Like you could. Johnny smugly smiled at Daniel.

...

Will knocked on his son's bedroom door. "Joey, ven a poner la mesa." He put his ear on the door to listen behind the blasting 80s rock. He heard his son throwing punches in the air. "Joseph!"

"¡Saldré en un minuto!" He replied. "¡Tu tío Jonathan y yo hicimos tacos de asada!"

"Okay!"

Joey sat, eating the asada tacos his father and uncle cooked up. "They're good. So, what's going on, tío?" Will drank his soda as his older brother spoke. "Wanted to stay for a while and Rae told me to take care of you two." W: "And, the wife." Jon winced, nodding. "The kids are out of town and she's nagging right now. Wanting more, uh, sensual things." "Bleh!" Joey jokingly cringed. "Yeah, bleh." His father agreed. "Oh! Have you decided what you're going as for the Halloween dance?" Joseph thought, "Well, yeah, I thought about going as Freddy Kruger but the costume is expensive." "Oh, don't worry, J. He's got you." Jon said with a smile. "And what happened there?" He pointed at his nephew's knuckles. "You don't wanna know." Will teasingly answered. Joseph looked at his father, "What?" The two Byers brothers laughed at the confused child. --

Joseph and Miguel did their training as Johnny went through papers. He walked out of his office, talking to his current students. "Hey, you guys don't happen to have any friends who wanna learn karate, do you?" They were very concentrated, letting his question go. "Aw, what am I saying? You don't have any friends. Sorry." Miguel paused, turning to Johnny. "Hey, Sensei, when will the kicking begin? I saw this YouTube video of a guy breaking boards, and it looked badass." "Yeah, no shit. Kicking is badass. But you're not ready." He further explained, now Joseph was all ears. "If I don't get students in here, I won't be able to teach you anything." Joey reminded him, "You've thought about advertising, right?" "Yeah, duh." He semi-lied. "Of course."

It was the next day. Joey and his friends sat at their usual table during lunch, Counselor Blatt speaking. "Cyberbullying is no laughing matter. Sending a cruel message to someone online can be just as hurtful as saying it to their face." The students were either on their phones, not caring. Miguel and Joey kept their eyes on the woman as they ate. "I'm not gonna name names, but the other day a mother called me up because her son was crying after some kids online made fun of his facial deformity." The teens all darted their eyes on Eli as he covered his scar. Joey sighed,  sick of their insults. "But today, our goal here is to make this school a safe space for all students." Miguel turned to the table. "If you're sick of getting bullied, our karate dojo's looking for recruits." Demetri turned it down with sarcasm. "Yeah, right. You hear that, Eli? A little karate training, and you're gonna kick some major ass." J: "He's serious, Demetri. Our sensei's the real deal." M: "Yeah, I'm sure we could get you both discounts." "As enticing as that sounds, I think we'd rather spend our afternoons playing Crucible Control than getting hit in the face."

Counselor Blatt continued, "One last thing. While we're all looking forward to the Halloween dance, let's make sure our costumes are culturally sensitive. For example, instead of sexy nurse, maybe try gender-neutral hospital employee." The students laughed. Joey's phone buzzed, a notification on the lock screen. PAPA: sent you a photo    

[fabfemmeboy]

Things about the Season 3 Finale of Handmaid's Tale that Don't Make Sense

I will say first that I preferred this episode to much of the season, even if there were parts I thought were unrealistic to the point of absurdity while I was watching it.  But after a day and a half, the list of nonsense keeps growing.

June was walking with an armed escort since her walking partner is dead.  While some of the girls were sneaky about their soap, it was a lot of them - and some were downright Not.Subtle.  I'm not just talking about Janine, either, but let's start with her.  Why didn't the guardian - whose whole job is to make sure the handmaid in his charge can't get up to something - not even notice? it wasn't like she just grinned, either, she was giddy and spoke and talked about how she couldn't wait.  If my job is to make sure the person I'm guarding doesn't get up to something, in particular if I'm used to seeing myself as above the person I'm guarding, then I'm asking questions.  I'm demanding answers.  I'm checking the bag.  This guy stands next to her and stares into space.  Did she just get the guy who's really bad at his job?  (How convenient!)  Is he so used to assuming that "those silly women chattering on about nonsense" can't be plotting anything serious?  (Really bad outlook for a guard to have)  Given some of the other guardians we've seen and how they handle far less communication between handmaids, why doesn't this guy seem to give a shit?  Is he secretly in the resistance, too? Is literally everyone except Fred, Serena, and Aunt Lydia?

For reference, Rebecca and her martha traveled about 12 miles by modern roads, likely much more than that when you factor darting through woods and back yards.  How the hell big is the martha network that one in Lexington knew about this plot?  How does a martha from central Boston, whose duties generally aren't going to let her go too much outside the city, get information all the way out there?

Oh, and how the hell did the martha get rohypnol?  You can make it impossible to get antidepressants, but date-rape drugs are still floating around?  Was the use of that particular substance deliberate, given the assault in Gilead, rather than simply making it sleeping pills or whatever Mrs. Lawrence took?

Speaking of whom - so Lawrence is just going to let it go that June either let his wife die or actively killed her?  The look at the end of the funeral last week seemed to indicate he knew or at least suspected.  But this guy, who clearly adored his wife and tried to protect her for *years*...doesn't even take his anger out on June? She's mouthing off to him and he just shrugs and lets her do it?

Rebecca looks to be about 8-10 and doesn't really remember before.  She's one of the oldest kids in the bunch.  The younger ones have literally never known a pre-Gilead time.  Why are none of them upset at being taken somewhere?  Why is not one of them crying for mommy and daddy?  Why aren't any of them whining that they want to go home?  Hell, it's been several hours and a lot of walking - none of them are complaining that they're bored or tired or itchy or hungry or bored.  Has Gilead managed to break children of complaining? Because *that* is quite a feat!  But seriously, if at age 6 my neighbor (whom I knew and trusted) had told me "we have to go now, be very quiet" and made me leave my home without my parents, I would have tried to be quiet for awhile but would have had a LOT of questions.  Like why aren't Mom and Dad here? Where are they? Are they ok? What's happening?  Why do we have to be quiet? Why are we going through the woods and not on the street? To avoid being seen - but why? Why can't the guards see us? They see us all the time.  And if the answer came that she was taking me out of the country, I would have a lot more questions about why and why couldn't mom and dad come and what would it be like there.

And by the way, "you can be anything you want to be" doesn't really work in a world where there don't seem to be professions other than "martha" or "commander" or "lady of leisure" or "sex slave."  Getting to wear whatever you want doesn't really make sense if everyone wears the same thing, either.  It's not like the kid is going to think "oh, good, I can wear red because I like that colour but here only those women wear it."  Like...that's not helpful.  And I get that nothing she could say would be helpful to these kids because how do you explain a completely different world to someone who has no concept of what that world includes? But these are not helpful answers.  So let's go with what the kids might have a concept of - what refugee children talk about when they leave:  violence.  Guys with guns on every corner (yay canada!).  People who disappear without warning.  Though maybe the kids won't have any concept of that, either, because the commanders' families are kept so isolated and protected.

Were all the kids from commanders' families? They made it sound like Rebecca was an anomaly in that regard, but technically all the guys in suits with wives and handmaids are commanders.  And those are also the only homes that have marthas.  Everyone else has econowives, and everyone dresses in grey - even the kids.  So these children, in their pale pink and blue, they all have to be the children of commanders/wives/handmaids, right?  Why were only Rebecca's parents looking for her? Sure, she'd been gone longer, but if it's getting dark and my child isn't home, I'm going to be pretty freaked out and calling the guys with guns to find her, especially given the community turmoil lately - Nicole was "kidnapped," Serena and Fred and the guy from DC were all "taken" by Canada...considering how protective everyone is of their children, particularly in this world, they don't seem to pay very close attention to the kids' whereabouts.

This has bothered me since Emily at the beginning of the season but came up again: When you're trying to avoid being seen by helicopters overhead, TAKE OFF YOUR WHITE HAT!  It's bad enough you're in red...though I suppose given how few handmaids were on this adventure at least a few of them could have changed into spare martha dresses so they blend into the woods a little better.  (June has several dresses, you can't tell me marthas - who cook and clean - only have one.  You're telling me that the woman who thought to soap the back gate so it wouldn't squeak, who has gone undercover before, couldn't think to change into less visible clothing?)  But at the very least, the white thing on top of your head is going to be incredibly visible at night, even without flashlights.  Take it off ffs!

Was Janine always going to be going?  Why are no other handmaids trying to get out?  We have a handful of marthas who see this opportunity and are getting on a plane, but only Janine - crazy, traumatized, batshit-screwy Janine - has the wherewithall to think "...if a plane's leaving, it could take me with it too"?  Has she finally stopped trying to get back to baby Angela?  And if so, can she give June lessons in that because this whole "I'm staying behind to find my daughter" thing is getting to be a really old plot device.  

Were we supposed to be surprised that June was wiling to forego her seat on the plane? Because from the reactions of the other characters, I think we were supposed to be, but I was never under the impression she was leaving with the kids, I assumed she was going to stay and try to do another of these hair-brained schemes in a way that got more people of colour killed because that's what she does at this point.  

Why the hell did you think there wouldn't be guardians at the tarmac?  Even if Rebecca weren't in the group, even if no one were looking for these kids (and they should be, btw), but just in general: it's a plane that brings things into Gilead.  They're not checking for contraband?  Because if they're not, then the guardian are a) stupid and b) missing out on fantastic bribery/extortion opportunities.  

Did June tell Lawrence about giving away his art collection? Because poor Billy is in enough trouble already, but he thought at least he's be able to go raid that house.  But now that Lawrence stayed behind, I'm just picturing the bartender showing up in a truck to take out paintings and being greeted by a very angry commander.

Not one child pops up or down from the group at the wrong time.  Clearly these writers/directors have never seen an elementary school concert.

Back to the tarmac.  They made a big deal about June bringing her gun.  Why the fuck is she throwing rocks?  Is it because she's worried she's not a good enough shot?  If so, why bring it? And even then, since your goal clearly isn't to kill him - just distract him - given that you're throwing rocks which aren't going to hit him unless he's a blind moron...why not shoot his car?  Shoot, as long as you hit *something* he's going to turn to look for the source, you duck, repeat, same as the rocks only at least that way poor Janine gets the fuck out of Gilead.  And all the other marthas.

BTW, when June takes off running to draw the gun away from the tarmac...did everyone else go board the plane? They could have, but somehow Janine was still in Gilead.  Were the rest of the rock-throwers?  Because most of them are going to end up dead otherwise.  But the plane only seemed to have a small handful of adults, and the only one we saw enough of to recognize was Rita.

Ok, so we get to Canada, and I have to ask: Do they just have a hanger ready for refugee planes at all times? Because this operation was very well-stocked for a plane that just departed 40 minutes ago, and given that they had no idea kids were on-board, I suspect there wasn't a whole lot of communication beforehand about the plane coming, so how did the refugee assistance people even know to go wait at a hanger? That's also a really nice hanger for a random cargo plane.  Was all of that arranged in advance?  Because otherwise I imagine a sudden flurry of calls to Moira and co from the head of the RAFC going "holy shit, a plane full of refugees just arrived at the airfield where the fedex planes leave from, get people down here to help!"  But they've clearly been there awhile setting up and knew to expect people...but not to expect kids.

Unlike Hannah, who kind of remembers June but doesn't really feel connected to her anymore, Rebecca not only recognizes her dad but runs to him and throws her arms around him, as happy to see him as he is to see her.  So she doesn't remember before, but remembers her dad clearly enough to have actively missed him. ��That...doesn't make a ton of sense given what we've seen so far.  Like, she's happier to see her dad than Oliver was to see Emily, and Oliver has had his memories of his mom actively reinforced by Syl this whole time.

(On a separate note, the most wrenching moment of the whole episode was Luke hoping for Hannah.  I love when shows use "the audience knows something the characters don't" to heighten emotions like that.)

Why, when Fred picked things to tell Tuello, did he go with pimping June out and NOT with the fact that they raped her to induce labor?  Is it because Fred still thinks that was totally fine, but June/Nick was a betrayal somehow?  Because given the fight they had at the house, it was clear Serena had decided after the fact that it was wrong and tried to throw it in his face when he was adamant he did it because she told him to and because he was trying to "fix [her] mess."    

(Also was I the only one who thought it was going to be that she had done something way worse? Been the one left holding the bag on the terrorist act that started the civil war?  Had secretly poisoned some prominent people? Hell, it wouldn't surprise me if she were the one who came up with the Ceremony in the first place, and architects of war crimes are still war criminals - hence Lawrence, remember?)

The morning after 52 children and a handful of adults escape Gilead, 6 women in bright red robes can walk through the woods near the tarmac from which the kids went missing to search for, rescue, and carry back another woman all in red...without anyone noticing.  Sure, that sounds like the guardians we all know and love for convenient plot purposes.

[saras-almanac]

I am procrastinating actually working on my portfolio so I figured why not write about my frustrations. 

This will surprise no one, but I’m still thinking about the Emmerdale garbage and boring storyline that is Rebecca’s pregnancy. The reason I can’t let this go is just the absolutely lazy writing with it. What exactly was their goal here?

That’s actually a serious question. What were they trying to accomplish? What was the end result? Because how it stands right now, there isn’t one. (Under cut because this is a long slightly rambling thing.)

I have seen a few theories popping up, trying to explain it but that shouldn’t be entirely on the viewer! (I actually wrote about them all in here but it turned into a monster document so I’ll post that later as a random side post.) It’s fun to have theories that we share and try and piece things together, but there still needs to be a base of something. There’s nothing with this storyline.

It literally feels like they wanted us to completely forget the last year or so because if you think about it, it makes absolutely zero sense. I talked a little bit about Robert and the context surrounding the ONS that sort of strains the believability for me. But what I want to talk about is Rebecca.

First of all, if you’re going to impregnate someone, probably best to actually give them a storyline or at least a central voice regarding that pregnancy. Call me a crazed feminist, but if you’re having a woman get pregnant just to fuel a man’s storyline, not a great storyline to have. Even though I hate this storyline, they could have at least pretended to care about Rebecca. I mean, if you’re going down this route, making sure Rebecca actually gets a point of view is slightly crucial. Especially with how desperate IM is for us to love Rebecca. How can we love someone who barely feels like a person more days? Giving us more of her point of view or Robert’s on the actual baby would have helped the disconnect between Rebecca’s storyline and the plot that her womb has created. They have literally separated Rebecca from her own pregnancy storyline.

On that note, why did you have to completely alter her personality and character? Writers, you do remember that this is the same woman who slept with her sister’s boyfriend for an undisclosed amount of time up to and including Chrissie and Robert’s engagement party? Robert is by no means off the hook for this, but they both were present and knowingly doing that. Even when Rebecca came to Emmerdale she came to try and betray her family for Robert.

She’s not this innocent victim—something I thought the show had made pretty clear especially in regards to Rebecca’s relationship to Chrissie. However, that’s the route the show decided to go down post the ONS. It’s ridiculous and honestly a little insulting that they felt the only way to get people on board with this idea is have her be this completely innocent bystander that this pregnancy just happened to. It’s like they introduced Rebecca almost like a female Robert but then tried to transform her into a female Aaron because people love Aaron but it doesn’t work.

The thing is, as frustrating as it was to see Rebecca constantly trying to start things up with Robert again and constantly throwing herself at him, at least she was a fleshed out character then. They could have played with that. They could have used that dynamic that when she found out she was pregnant she decided to keep it just because it might make Robert choose her. Or maybe try to play the longer con of knowing that him and Aaron would probably break up again in the future since that’s sort of their MO and she’s just lying in wait again.

Or maybe she decides this is a chance to start over with someone who will love her unconditionally. Or it’s her way of trying to fill Chrissie’s shoes; she has a baby and lives at home with their dad while trying to learn their business. Or maybe it’s just because she has actually wanted a child for a while but never had a steady enough boyfriend for it to happen.

To be quite honest, the only thing I remember her saying is that she wants to be a mother. That’s great, but then they completely dropped everything that has to do with Rebecca. Vic’s the one putting together the nursery on apparently Robert’s dime. Actually Vic’s the one doing everything. If you’re going this route, then actually go down it and don’t hesitate to show both sides of this argument. It’s especially frustrating because they haven’t really given Robert a chance to figure out how he feels about this potential baby either.

They literally threw this plot together as a way to tie Robert to the Whites forever and be instrumental in booting them from Home Farm. But if you don’t know what your characters want, what their motivations are, then what’s guiding them?

Another point I wanted to come back to regarding Rebecca’s personality is the idea that Rebecca has apparently no more business sense. No sense at all. Wasn’t this the same woman who flew in on a helicopter and had the street smarts to figure our her own way for years? I could understand her struggling a little bit, but not to the extent that they have made her. I’d see her more like Charity when Charity was trying to help Debbie with that business deal—a bit out of her depth and just used to doing things differently. If she’s that bad at it, then why is she running Home Farm? You can’t honestly expect me to believe that Lawrence would have even allowed her to help if she was that awful at it—before his breakdown and break up Ronnie. But that might just be me.

They completely destroyed any potential for her character with this storyline and seem to be confused as to why people are not on board with her. First of all, you used her to break up one of the most supported pairings on the show; that was always going to be a hard thing to come back from. Just on principle alone there’s numerous fans who hate her just for that. Two, you took all her personality away and replaced it with a blinking humainoid whose only purpose seems to be interrupting Robert whenever he’s in a conversation with someone other than her and crying over her dad. We literally had the same scene with her about 15 times. How do they expect us to root for a character that doesn’t seem to actually be a character anymore? As much as I hate this storyline because it’s insulting to so many people on a rather personal level to assume that having a biological child seems to trump any other relationship you might have, there were still ways to have this come about with people still on board with Rebecca. Definitely not everyone, but I’m willing to be there would have been people who at least dealt with her a little bit.

That’s why I’m holding out hope for some sort of twist or scheme that Rebecca’s been planning this whole time. Don’t get me wrong, it would completely suck because they still need to give us something to hold onto regarding this scheme so it doesn’t come completely out of nowhere—unless of course it blindsides her as well. I just don’t want to believe that they would have thrown away all of Rebecca’s character for this.