#maybe I follow the wrong people over there

[thetetra]

I mean cheers to the positivity in the post and all but Imma tell a story to round this off and ground it a little.

Due to a series of accidents I ended up playing the violin as a child ( I can tell that atory upon request). 1 through 5th grades I played. and I hated it. I knew I was supposed to get better but it just made my hands hurt and I eeked along bit by bit.

Then my 5th grade summer I went to Orchestra camp in Tulsa Oklahoma, about a 2 hour drive from my house. The first day this older Russian woman started telling us how we were holding our instruments wrong BASED ON THE CALLUSES ON OUR HANDS. So she tells people how to correct their stance, feet too far apart, shoulders too far forward ect ect and gets to me. And she goes over my hands again and is just silent, then she says "You will never be good at the violin" and then continues to start talking to me about the cello or maybe a base, possibly a viola. And I couldn't hear her over the sound of the relief I felt. My hands were too big. I had put in all that work and gotten nothing back or gotten an inch where I put in a miles of effort.

And I went home and I said to my parents "I don't think I want to play the violin anymore " thinking they'd yell at me and I would get grounded and be in trouble, but they just said "Oh okay!" and didn't send me to the rest of Orchestra camp.

I can still hear those book 1 songs from an old cassette tape in my head, played beautifully by a master nice and slow easy to follow "Now you try!" ... and I can hear how I played it with all the errors and extra noises and dropping the violin when I needed to shift my grip.

Natural talent is a factor... and if you mention that you could never do it that is valid and not an automatic dismissal of every bit of work they did.

If you are enjoying the work then do the work and hone it! I hope you make tangible progress for a thousand thousand years! But if you are banging your head against a wall and the basics escape you, then appreciate the experience and find something that is better suited to making you happy as you do it

So earlier in art class today, someone drew a characters hands in their pockets and mentioned that hands are really like the ultimate end boss of art, and most of us wholeheartedly agreed. So then, our teacher went ahead and free handed like a handful of hands on the board, earning a woah from a couple of students. So the one from earlier mentioned how it barely took the teacher ten seconds to do what I can’t do in three hours. And you know what he responded?

“It didn’t take me ten seconds, it took me forty years.”

And you know, that stuck with me somehow. Because yeah. Drawing a hand didn’t take him fourth years. But learning and practicing to draw a hand in ten seconds did. And I think there’s something to learn there but it’s so warm and my brain is fried so I can’t formulate the actual morale of the lesson.

[lucyblue101]

All of me, loves all of you

Satoru x reader

Authors note: angst, comfort, happy ending. Satoru needs reassurance

The night had been particularly long for both of them. The familiar weight of exhaustion hung over their shared space, but it wasn’t just the day’s physical toll on their bodies. Something in the air felt different—charged with an emotion that neither of them had put into words. The dim light of the moon filtered through the curtains, casting soft shadows across the room. The gentle hum of the city below was the only sound besides the quiet breathing of two people who had been through more than anyone should.

Satoru Gojo, however, was far from resting. He lay awake, staring at the ceiling, his mind far away from the warm embrace of sleep. He could hear the rhythmic breathing of Y/N beside him, the gentle rise and fall of her chest a soothing contrast to the turmoil inside him. It wasn’t that he didn’t love her—he did, more than anything. But tonight, something was gnawing at him. It wasn’t new; it had been lingering for some time, but it was heavier now, pressing against his chest like a weight he couldn’t shake.

He turned his head, his eyes shifting to her as she slept soundly. The moonlight caught the soft curve of her face, the way her hair fanned out across the pillow, the steady rise and fall of her chest as she dreamed. She was so peaceful, so perfect, and for a moment, he couldn’t help but stare.

His fingers twitched as he reached out, brushing a loose strand of hair away from her face. His heart swelled at the sight of her, but also twisted in a way he couldn’t quite explain. He was her protector, her partner, but sometimes, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he wasn’t enough for her. That maybe, despite everything, he couldn’t give her the life she deserved.

“Gojo?” Y/N’s soft voice broke through the stillness, and he froze, his gaze shifting to her as she stirred, blinking sleepily at him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” he murmured, a faint smile tugging at his lips, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “Just admiring you. You look so peaceful.”

Y/N frowned, her senses kicking in as she noticed the sadness in his eyes. She didn’t speak right away, letting the moment linger as she studied his face. Something wasn’t right. She could feel it.

“Satoru,” she whispered, sitting up and turning to face him. “What’s wrong?”

He sighed deeply, the weight of his emotions seeping into his tone. He wasn’t good at this. Not at all. He had his walls, his own ways of coping with everything the world threw at him. But in that moment, with her soft eyes on him, he couldn’t pretend anymore. “I just... I just feel like I’m not enough for you sometimes. I want to be everything for you, Y/N, but it doesn’t feel like I am. You deserve so much more than what I can give you.”

Her heart skipped a beat. The words he said were so quietly desperate, so vulnerable, that it sent a shockwave through her. He was the mighty Satoru Gojo, the strongest sorcerer—how could he doubt himself, doubt what they had?

“Don’t say that, baby,” she whispered, reaching out to gently cup his face in her hands. “You’re more than enough for me.”

But he shook his head, pulling away slightly. “I don’t want you to just settle for me, Y/N. I want to be the person you need. But sometimes I think I fail you.”

“Stop,” she said, her voice a little more firm, her heart breaking at the sight of him—this man who carried so much on his shoulders. “You don’t fail me. Never. Please don’t think that way.”

He looked at her for a long moment before standing up, running a hand through his messy hair. “I need some air. I think it’ll help clear my mind.”

Y/N sat there for a moment, watching him with concern, her heart pulling in her chest. She couldn’t let him go like this. She couldn’t let him suffer alone. Without saying a word, she stood up and followed him.

“I can come with you, right?” she asked, her voice tentative.

He turned to look at her, his expression unreadable, before nodding slowly. “Yeah. You can.”

They walked to the balcony in silence, the cool night air greeting them as they stepped outside. The city stretched out below them, lights twinkling like a distant galaxy, but everything felt so quiet. So lonely.

Satoru leaned against the railing, his hands gripping it tightly. He looked out at the horizon, the flickering lights, but his mind was still far away. Y/N approached him slowly, wrapping her arms around his waist from behind, pressing her forehead gently against his back. She could feel the tension in his muscles, the weight of his thoughts, the heaviness that he carried.

“I love you, you know?” she whispered, her voice full of certainty. “I love you so much.”

Satoru let out a shaky breath, his fingers curling into the railing as if to hold himself together. “Do you?” His voice was barely a whisper, tinged with doubt. “Are you sure? Because I... I love you more than anything. More than anything in the world.”

Her heart shattered at the question, at the raw vulnerability in his voice. It was as though he was asking for reassurance, something he’d never really done before.

She stepped around to face him, lifting her hands to gently cup his face, guiding him to look at her. His eyes were red-rimmed, the corners wet with unshed tears, and it took everything in her not to fall apart.

“I love you so, so much, Satoru,” she said, her voice steady, though her heart ached. “I love you with everything I have.”

He shook his head, his voice cracking. “But what if I’m not enough? What if you’re just—what if you’re just staying with me out of pity?”

“No!” she gasped, pulling him closer, wrapping her arms around his waist tightly. “No, baby, no. You are everything to me. You’re not just enough. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted and more. Don’t you see that?”

Satoru’s hands trembled as they slid around her, holding her close. The tears that had been building up finally spilled over, his shoulders shaking with emotion. He buried his face in her hair, his voice muffled as he spoke. “I’m afraid you’ll realize one day that you deserve someone better than me.”

Y/N held him tighter, her heart aching as she whispered into his ear. “Satoru... I love the fact that you’re kind. I love that you’re so sweet, even when the world doesn’t deserve it. I love the way you try to protect everyone, even when it tears you apart. I love that what people don’t know about you is that you’re so gentle. I love your heart, the way it cares so deeply. I love the way your eyes look when you’re completely vulnerable... the way you look right now. I love your body, your eyes, your hair, your smile. I love every part of you... even the parts you think are dirty and ugly. Every single part of you. You are enough, Satoru. You are everything.”

As soon as the words left her lips, Satoru’s whole body shook. He gasped as if he had been holding his breath the entire time, his heart racing wildly. His hands clutched at her even tighter, as though afraid she would slip away. His head dropped to her shoulder, tears soaking through her shirt as he let himself break in her arms.

“I don’t deserve you,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. “I don’t deserve any of this, but I want you... I want to be the man you deserve. Please don’t leave me.”

Y/N cupped his face, pulling him back to look at her. “I’m not going anywhere, Satoru. I’m here. I’m not going to leave you.”

He stared into her eyes for a long moment before, in an almost instinctive motion, he pressed her hand against his chest, right over his heart. “This is yours, Y/N. My heart... it’s yours. I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. You’re everything to me. Please never doubt that.”

She felt the steady thrum of his heartbeat beneath her palm, and she smiled through her tears. It was like the weight of the world had lifted off of him, and somehow, it had lifted from her as well.

“I love you so much, Satoru,” she whispered again, her voice full of certainty.

He kissed her forehead softly, then her cheeks, tasting the salt of her tears, before finally pressing his lips to hers, slow and deep. She melted into him, her heart still racing, but this time it was from joy. From the overwhelming sense that they were finally, truly together—no walls, no doubts, no barriers.

They stood there for a long time, kissing, holding each other as if the world had faded away. And when they finally pulled apart, Y/N rested her head against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart. The night was quiet again, but this time, it was filled with the unspoken promise of love—of a love that was theirs, unbreakable and infinite.

Satoru pressed another kiss to the top of her head, tightening his arms around her

Tag list (let me know if you wanna go on it 🥹)

@canigotosleep--plz

@haruhatake

@hargun-s

@tibibibi123

@itsafairytalekay

@mistymuii

@moonchhu

[silent-stories]

𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐔𝐈𝐋𝐃 𝐀 𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐘 - 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄

Pairing: Noah Sebastian x reader

Summary: When Noah was left alone to take care of his daughter about two years ago, he never thought he would find someone else he would trust enough to include in his little family. But things can change.

Series masterlist

Sunday morning, the sun hung high in the sky, casting a warm glow over the busy city center. Noah walked beside you, a relaxed smile spreading across his face as he held Luna's hand while she looked around her at the vibrant streets filled with laughter and the aroma of street food, with curiosity.

The little girl had never liked strollers and had always refused to use one. She mostly wanted to walk or be held in her father's arms.

"Yes! I saw it! It was hiding behind the trees but I saw it!" She said.

"The unicorn was hiding behind the trees?"

"Yes! It was white and big and pretty but it was hiding. But I saw it anyway!"

"That's great! I'm happy you saw it!" You laughed.

As you walked along, you paused to admire a shop window displaying colorful toys. Luna squirmed excitedly. “Look, Daddy! Bunnies!” she exclaimed, pointing at a big, fluffy bunny in the window.

"Yeah, that one is really pretty." He agreed.

Just then, a group of people, obviously fans, caught sight of Noah.

They talked for a moment between them, poiting at him, and soon whispers turned into excited shouts, and within moments, several people had approached, their phones out.

“Noah! Can we get a picture?” one voice called, followed by others echoing the request.

Noah's demeanor shifted almost instantly. The polite smile faded, replaced by a look of concern as he straightened up. “I’m sorry guys, not when I’m with my daughter.” His voice was steady, but the tension was palpable as he shifted his focus back to Luna, who looked at him with confusion.

“Daddy, what’s wrong?” she asked, her voice trembling just a little as he easily picked her up.

Noah lowered his tone, trying to reassure her, but his eyes darted nervously to the little crowd formed around you. It wasn't even exactly a crowd, maybe a dozen people at most, but that was enough for Noah to worry.

“Nothing, sweetheart. Just some people who like dad's music.” But the enthusiasm from the fans was relentless.

“Please! Just one quick shot.” someone insisted, pushing closer. Noah’s face tightened, protective instincts flaring as panic flickered in his gaze.

His hand caressed the little girl's back, holding her close as if someone might suddenly jump in and snatch her from his arms.

You knew that if it had been any other time he would have gladly stopped for a few pictures, and if it had been any other time where he simply didn't feel like interacting with them, he would have explained how he felt and walked away. But he was with his daughter and this time it was different.

You knew how Noah had always wanted to protect her from the internet and fans, how he had never posted a photo of her on any social media before deleting them all, how he didn't want his daughter to end up in the spotlight. And he didn't want her to end up in any picture of video taken of them and posted online.

"Just a picture. Please!"

God, some people are really out of their minds. Is it really so easy to forget that people, even if public figures, have a life outside of their work and a minimum amount of privacy you have to respect?

“Come here, sweetie,” you said, stepping forward and gently taking Luna from Noah's arms.

He didn't hesitate for a second, letting you take her without putting up any kind of minimal resistance, showing that he trusted you completely.

As you cradled her close, you could feel her small heart racing against you, instinctively hiding her face in the crook of your neck.

Good. No pictures or videos of her face.

“Let’s go look at some toys,” you whispered softly, wanting to shield her from the chaos. Luna clung to you, comforted by your presence, her earlier excitement replaced by uncertainty.

“Okay.” she replied anyway, her trust in you evident. You turned to Noah, who stood frozen, a mix of gratitude and worry etched across his features.

“It's okay. I've got her.” you assured him.

Noah nodded, relief flooding his expression as he let you take her away. You hurried into the nearby toy store, leaving Noah with the fans, Luna giggling as you entered the vibrant space filled with colorful displays and soft music. You felt the atmosphere shift as the door closed behind you, the chaos outside fading away.

Once inside, Luna obviously wanted to explore and you put her down, kneeling to her level. “Look at all the bunnies!” you exclaimed, gesturing to a display filled with plush toys. Her eyes sparkled as she darted toward the shelf, her earlier apprehension forgotten.

“Can I get one, please?” she asked, her voice filled with excitement as she clutched a particularly fluffy bunny.

“Of course! That one’s perfect,” you replied, smiling at her. She hugged it tightly, Mr. Flop still in a hand.

Moments later, you glanced back toward the door, where Noah had just entered, his expression softening the moment he saw you and Luna together. He took a deep breath, and you could see the tension in his shoulders start to ease.

"You alright?" You asked.

“Yes. Thank you, for what you did,” he said quietly, approaching you both. His voice was sincere, a mix of relief and gratitude. “I was starting to panic. I hate that feeling of being unable to protect her, especially when I know how intrusive some fans can be.”

You nodded, understanding the weight of his concerns. “It’s important to keep her safe,” you said softly. “I wanted to make sure she was okay. You shouldn’t have to worry about that while you’re out with her.”

Noah smiled, his eyes reflecting appreciation as he knelt beside Luna. “That means a lot. The way you immediately stepped in, worrying about her. It means a lot to me.”

Luna, oblivious to the deeper conversation, held up her new bunny. “Look, Daddy! It’s so fluffy!”

“That’s the best bunny I’ve ever seen,” Noah said, his smile returning, the earlier panic dissolving into laughter.

"Yeah but... but I don't want Mr. Flop to feel sad because I have another bunny. I think I'll leave this one here."

As you all explored the toy store together, Noah took your hand, his grip warm and gentle as he interviewed his tattooed fingers with yours. He brought your hand to his lips, kissing your knuckles with a soft smile.

You let your thumb run over his fingers for a moment as Luna dashed ahead, her laughter ringing through the aisles as she discovered new toys.

That afternoon, you lounged comfortably on the couch at Noah’s house, your head gently resting on his shoulder, the light streaming through the windows and casting a warm glow across the living room. The atmosphere was relaxed, filled with the soft sound of crayons scratching against paper as Luna sat on the floor, completely engrossed in her drawings.

Suddenly, she looked up. “Daddy! Can we do a spa day? Like we did last time?”

Noah raised an eyebrow, a playful grin spreading across his face. “Right now?”

“Yeah! Please!” Luna insisted, bouncing on her knees.

“Okay, let’s do it.” Noah chuckled, clearly amused by the idea. Luna squealed with delight and dashed off to gather supplies. You exchanged an amused glance with Noah, who shook his head with a smile.

“What exactly does a spa day involve?” you asked, genuinely curious.

"I guess you are gonna find out soon."

Luna returned, triumphantly raising two tiny bottles of bright pink nail polish in her hands. “These!"

Noah let out a mock sigh but couldn’t hide his grin. “What can I do? It makes her happy.”

Luna turned her attention to you. “Will you help me, please?”

“Of course!” You moved closer to Noah, who extended his hands with a mix of amusement and reluctance, one to you and one to Luna.

As you took the nail polish, you carefully began applying it to Noah’s nails, trying not to burst out laughing. The warmth of his skin felt nice beneath your fingertips.

Luna watched intently, her face serious with concentration. “Make it pretty!” she said while working on the other hand.

You laughed softly as you painted his nails, the bright pink contrasting sharply with all the tattoos that sprawled across his skin. “You know, this really matches all your tattoos, you should definitely wear it more often,” you teased, unable to suppress a grin.

“Yeah?” he replied, glancing down at his hand. “Pretty stylish, huh?”

“Definitely!” you said, finishing up the second nail.

Luna couldn’t contain her excitement. “Your nails look so nice daddy!”

Noah chuckled, shaking his head again. “I can’t believe this is happening.”

Luna leaned in closer, carefully holding Noah's to paint the next nail. You watched her concentrate, the way her little tongue poked out in concentration making you smile.

“Just wait until you have to explain this to the guys.”

“Joke's on you. Last time they told me I looked very pretty.” he laughed, the sound warm and genuine.

Luna looked up at her dad, her eyes shining with pride. “You are pretty, dad!” she exclaimed, her innocent honesty making both of you burst into laughter.

“Yeah, he is,” you chimed in, smiling at Noah, who looked slightly bashful under the compliment as a light shade of pink suddenly appeared on his cheeks.

“Alright,” he said, finally breaking into a full smile. “This is the best spa day ever.”

As Luna finished up the last nail, she stepped back to admire her work. “You look amazing!”

“Thanks to my talented nail artist and her not-so-bad assistant,” he replied, looking at both of you with genuine affection.

You watched as Luna returned to her drawings, sprawled out on the floor with her crayons, the colors filled the page as she drew what seemed like a little house.

Noah leaned back on the couch, a thoughtful expression crossing his face, before closing his eyes for a moment.

"You okay?"

“Yeah, its just... this morning really got to me,” he said quietly, opening his eyes and turning to you. “I hate how some people seems to think they have the right to invade our private lives.  Especially when it comes to Luna.”

You nodded, understanding what he was trying to explain.

“I want her to have a normal childhood," he continued, running a hand through his hair in frustration, "I don’t want her to grow up in front of a camera or have to deal with people dissecting her life just because I’m in the spotlight sometimes. I mean, look at what happened this morning. It’s like people forget that we’re just trying to live our lives. I'm not even famous enough for that.”

He paused, his gaze drifting back to Luna, who was completely absorbed in her art. “She deserves to be just a kid, to explore and create without anyone watching. I think about the fact that people can post pictures online—pictures of us together, and it drives me crazy knowing that anyone can comment on them, say whatever they want. It’s not just about me anymore; it’s about her, too. I don’t want to see her face plastered online for people to judge.”

You kept nodding, without interrupting him.

“What bothers me the most is how little respect there is for privacy. I don’t want her growing up with that kind of exposure. I want to control what parts of our lives get shared and what stays private. I want to be the one to decide when she’s ready for the world to see her, not some random person with a phone. And these are the same fucking people that go online saying that I can't be a good father because of my lifestyle and based on the few things they know about me. Or think to know.”

He took a deep breath, “And it’s not just about her now. I want to protect you too. Some people can be so cruel, and I don’t want you to be a target for their opinions. You’re part of our life now, and I want to make sure you’re safe."

He took a deep breath.

“Let it all out?” you asked gently after a moment of silence.

He chuckled softly, a hint of relief in his tone. “Kind of. It just builds up, you know?”

“Thank you for worrying about me, but I can handle it,” you replied, meeting his gaze. “You’re a good father, Noah. Don’t forget that. You’re doing everything you can to raise her well, and it shows. Luna is happy, and that’s what matters most.”

His expression softened. “I just want to protect her and give her a life where she can be herself, without all that noise. I want to make sure she grows up knowing she’s loved.”

“You’re already doing that,” you reassured him. “You’re present, you listen, and you create these moments for her. That’s what makes you a great dad.”

Noah smiled, the tension in his shoulders easing as he looked back at Luna, still lost in her drawings. “Thanks. I guess sometimes I just need a reminder.”

“Come here,” you said, wrapping your arms around him and pulling him into a gentle hug. As you held him close, you pressed a kiss to his temple.

"I love you." He whispered reasting his chin on your shoulder, wrapping his arms around you.

"I love you too."

In that moment, Luna looked up from her drawing. “Daddy! Look at my drawing!” She held it up proudly, revealing a house, some birds and trees.

“That’s so good!” Noah exclaimed, his earlier tension melting away as he talked to her. "We will add that to the others on the fridge."

She giggled, basking in his praise.

As Luna returned to her art, you and Noah exchanged a knowing glance.

"Everything's gonna be okay. It already is."

He just gave you a little smile.

Some hours later, you stepped out of Noah’s house, walking across the yard. You gave Noah one last kiss and waved at Luna as she clung to his leg on the porch. The soft hum of their voices faded behind you as you made your way to the car parked just outside his gate.

Just as you reached the driver’s side door and your hand was about to grip the handle, a voice called out, soft but firm, from across the street.

“Are you Noah’s girlfriend?”

You turned toward the sound of the voice, spotting an elderly woman standing in the garden of a modest house next door to Noah’s. She had delicate features—her skin a soft, pale olive tone, and her dark eyes were almond-shaped, sharp, and full of warmth. A few strands of silver hair escaped from the bun at the back of her head, and her cane, dark wood with a polished sheen, tapped lightly on the ground as she took a step forward. She wore a simple but cheerful floral dress, obviously faded with time, like she wore it often, but still vibrant.

"Yeah, I am," you replied with a polite smile, pausing for a moment.

The woman’s face brightened, and she took a few careful steps toward the sidewalk, her cane tapping gently against the pavement. Her voice was soft but full of affection. “Oh, I’m glad to finally see you. I don’t get out much anymore, but I’ve heard good things about you.” She paused, her gaze softening with a look of quiet pride. “Noah is such a good man. He deserves someone like you.”

You smiled warmly at her as she reached out a hand.

“I’m Mrs. Lin,” she introduced herself, her grip firm despite her age. You shook her hand.

“I’m his neighbor," Mrs. Lin continued, her voice gentle but steady. "Noah’s helped me a few times with things around the house—things I can’t quite manage anymore.” Her eyes glistened with affection as she looked toward Noah’s house. “He’s always been such a good boy. Always so kind to me. His friends too.”

You nodded, "Oh, I know."

There was a pause, and Mrs. Lin’s expression softened as she glanced back toward her own home. “Last time I saw little Luna, she was only two years old. I doubt she even remembers me. I’d love to see her again, if that’s possible.”

“Maybe one day we can stop by to say hi, I can ask Noah. I'm sure Luna would love to meet you again.”

Mrs. Lin’s face lit up at your words. “Oh, that would make my day! I’d really like that.”

“We’ll make it happen, then.”

“Thank you, dear,” Mrs. Lin said, her smile still wide. “Take care, and tell Noah I said thank you again for all his help.”

“I will,” you said with a nod, turning toward your car, looking at the lady disappearing behind the door of her house.

"Is this okay?" Noah asked, adjusting a vase of daisies on the counter, a proud smile on his face as he stepped back to admire the setup.

The next morning you were at the café again. A small sign reading “The Breakfast Nook turns three today” hung on the door.

You and Noah had spent the last hour decorating it with soft fairy lights draped from the ceiling, while fresh flowers in delicate mason jars were scattered across the tables. The scent of fresh-baked cookies wafted through the ai, free samples to entice customers and bring a little joy to their morning.

"It’s perfect," you replied, grinning as you took in the sight of the shop. The little details—a few candles flickering softly, the cheerful splash of flowers, and the freshly printed sign promising free cookies—had turned the space into something special. "I think we’re ready."

He flashed you a quick smile before leaning over to press a kiss to your forehead. "You did an amazing job," he said quietly, his voice soft but sincere.

Before you could thank him, the bell above the door chimed, and in walked your coworker Grace, her posture as rigid as ever. You knew she’d be a little skeptical about your morning plan, and you braced yourself for her usual comments.

"Well, well, well, look who’s gone all Pinterest on us," Grace remarked "You sure you’re not planning on opening a flower shop instead? ‘Cause I don’t see much ‘coffee’ going on here." She raised an eyebrow, a smug smile creeping onto her face.

You rolled your eyes, but before you could fire back, Noah leaned against the counter, cool and collected as usual but with a little smirk on his lips. "Good morning to you too, Grace."

Grace shot him a side-eye but said nothing, her lips quirking into a smirk as well. She wasn’t exactly fond of Noah, and it wasn’t a secret. Ever since you’d started spending more time with him, Grace had made it clear that she wasn’t a fan of your "rockstar boyfriend". But Noah didn’t seem to mind; if anything, he seemed to enjoy the playful back-and-forth.

"You two are like a walking rom-com," she said with a dramatic sigh, throwing her apron over her shoulder.

"Thanks, Grace," you said.

Just as you finished saying that, a young mom entered, two kids in tow, their eyes immediately lighting up at the sight of the cookies.

"Free cookies?" The little boy’s face broke into a wide grin, and his sister tugged on their mom’s sleeve.

"You got it," you said with a smile, handing them each a cookie from the counter. The kids eagerly tore into them, eyes wide with excitement.

Noah chuckled softly as he watched the kids, clearly amused by their enthusiasm as their mother asked for a coffee with double cream. "Guess the cookies are doing their job."

And then more customers filtered in, all taking advantage of the free treats, the shop’s atmosphere becoming warmer and busier by the minute. Behind the counter, you and Grace fell into a comfortable rhythm, as you kept chatting with Noah in front of you. The gentle hum of the café was the perfect backdrop to the easy conversation between the two of you.

Noah was eating one of your cookies when you grabbed a few of them off a tray and slid them into a small paper bag.

"Hey," you said, catching his attention as you held up the bag. "I made sure to save a few extras for Luna. I think she'll like these."

He glanced at it, his expression softening.

"I'm sure she will, thank you."

"No problem."

"I’ll make sure she gets them later. She’s been asking me when we can come by the café to see you again."

"Tell her to come soon then. I’ll save some fresh ones just for her."

Noah chuckled. "She'll love that for sure."

As the door kept chiming, the steady flow of people seemed to spill into the shop, drawn in by the combination of free cookies and the cozy charm of the space. You caught glimpses of families, couples, and people with books or laptops, all taking a seat and enjoying the welcoming ambiance.

It was simple but you loved it.

You were putting a glass on a shelf behind the counter when you glanced out of the front window, and everything stopped.

Outside, several trucks were pulling up, unloading large boxes and equipment. Workers scurried around, setting things up.

You stared at the scene, your chest tightening.

They were putting up a sign.

Jason’s Ink Studio.

A sharp breath hitched in your throat, the realization setting in. You didn't know what to expect, but seeing that name in the world again? It felt like the ground shifted under your feet.

Your ex was back.

The sign went up, clear as day.

Jason’s Ink Studio.

And as you stood there, the noise of the café faded around you, replaced by the pounding beat of your own heart in your ears.

Tags: @anything-more-than-human @ladyveronikawrites @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @fadingangelwisp @xmads-omensx @iwasntstable @thisbicc @pathion @mathfairchild1 @flowery-mess @into-the-grey @lma1986 @tosoundlessdarkistare @stardustsirenmelody @thewrstinme

TBAF Tags: @aubrey-melinoe @klutzy-kay24 @mrscevans @concreteangel92 @iconic-taurus @niicoleleigh @cheyyyyr @supersquirrel1996 @respectfulrebel @alwaysfighforwhoyouare @clickmedead @missduffsblog

[stardustizuku]

So, Gushing Over Magical Girls Is The Best Thing To Happen to Magical Girls

Gushing Over Magical Girls get this bad rep. For all the wrong reasons. I’ve seen it be called an insult to Magical Girls, I’ve seen it be called “gooner bait” a term I absolutely despise but that’s a thing for another day. I’ve seen it insulted for everything and anything under the sun.

I first got acquainted with it when I was scrolling through Twitter and I saw someone complain about the PV. However, as an avid Magical Girl Fan, I wasn’t disgusted. I was intrigued.

I decided to read the manga, and oh god.

This is one of the best things I’ve read.

The story follows Utena, a shy girl that loves Magical Girls, tricked to become the evil general that will defeat the Magical Girl team “Tres Magia”.

And it’s a delight.

I binged all the episodes available to me in the manga, and had fun in each and every chapter.

The same, however, couldn’t be said by half the people who watched the anime. And I was extremely baffled. As a queer woman, this was the first time in my life, in which I had seen something so deliberately catered towards me. I saw tell-tale signs of someone who genuinely admires the genre, and is simply using it as an outlet for exploring deeper and more interesting topics that a SFW version of it would not be able to.

Yet, I turn around and I see people calling it the most horrendous stuff, and accusing everyone who likes it of being monsters or men.

Genuinely, I’ve had enough.

Gushing Over Magical Girl is not the Devil. In fact, I think it’s the best thing to come don’t even like Magical Girls AND IT SHOWS.

PART 1: “Magical girls are for little girls!”.

The first criticism you’ll see aimed at “Gushing over Magical girl” is the amount of sexually charged content it has. And it is true. It borders on straight up porn in many instances and it just gets wilder as you go on. By chapter 30, we’re way past PantyShots. Like, I’ve seen some of these girls’ vaginas, and I’m not joking.

Personally, I don’t see anything wrong with it, but there’s people who might disagree.

“Magical Girls are for little girls” some people say “and you’re corrupting it!”

Which genuinely makes me laugh.

This is because this type of argument could only be done by someone with no real concept of Magical Girls aside from maybe Sailor Moon and Sakura Card Captor.

out of the Magical Girl genre in a WHILE (Ignoring Precure, because they just gave us a magical boy and that’s my win of the decade).

People are just, you know, stupid. And reactionary. Enough that they see a boob and lose their minds like a Karen at a Christmas Eve Mall.

My point is, I love this manga. And I’m willing to risk my reputation to defend it. Cause genuinely, half the people who are clutching their pearls over this show - Magical Girl Anime haven’t always been PG, or aimed at girls.

Cutie Honey is a great example. It’s one of the most famous Magical Girl Anime you will find - and it’s a shonen. With the protagonist, Honey, being constantly naked, groped, put in suggestive situations and have outfits that show her cleavage.

And it’s one of the most famous, most popular takes on Magical Girl there is. Yet, I never see any amount of outrage towards it. (Part of me wonders if it’s because the fan service is aimed at men, rather than involving yuri).

There’s also Lyrical Nanoha, one of the most popular serial franchises there is. It spans several seasons and spinoffs, and it’s beloved by many.

And it’s aimed at older men. Yes, it’s a Seinen.

In fact, its origins are far from PG. It’s actually a Spin-off of an erotic game named “Triangle Heart”. It was most definitely not created with little girls in mind, and themes it tackles reflect as much.

There’s Fate/kaleid liner Prisma Illya too, a spinoff of the Fate/Stay Night VN, very obviously aimed at older men, it’s a Seinen. It has a lot of fanservice and scenes where the characters are half naked.

Day Break Illusion is also a Shonen.

And as much as I adora Madoka - I’ve been stating for years now that it isn’t a show meant for little girls. You could argue it’s for everyone, regardless of gender, who’s a little older. But it most definitely wasn’t for little girls.

So, no. This was never an “only girls” club. Trying to paint it as such, is not only wrong but ignorant.

Magical Girl shows can be for anyone. Men, boys, girls, women and I find it infantilizing to consider it “only for little girls”.

No one says “super heroes are ONLY for little boys”

Well, some do. But they’re, you know, bigots. Who don’t want girls playing or adults o have fun.

So no, Gushing Over Magical Girls being a sexually charged anime in the Seinen category isn’t “corrupting the genre”. In fact, I would argue it’s doing exactly what the genre has done in the OVA shadows for a while.

Not to mention, many people have screamed from the rooftop how they want “more mature Magical Girl shows” referring to the success of Madoka. But as soon as an actually mature take on Magical Girls shows up, tackling issues of sexuality and love, you all don’t want it anymore.

(We all know why, though. Americans, and western culture in general, considers mature themes, only that which involves violence. Anything close to discussing issues of sex is no longer “mature” but “Pornographic” and deserving of being shoved into a corner. With all queer themes, gender studies, and any nuance that could be had regarding these issues).

And speaking of sexually charged, have you watched so called “wholesome” magical girls? They’re still very much sexy. Not in the “on the nose” ecchi way Seinen and Shonen are - but they still are.

You’ll find transformations were the girls are naked, zoom in to their breasts, you’ll have panty shots every now and then. Even themes of growing up, having crushes, and innuendos about sex. Inappropriate relationships, taboo romance, and the likes.

Sakura had Rita and a professor’s relationship (mutual in the manga), Sailor Moon had Chibiusa and Elliot’s romance, Sugar Sugar Rune even having an element for ‘lust’ and other different types of love, and let’s not forget Mermaid Melody which has several instances of the girls naked, in compromising positions with other men. And I’m pretty sure Tokyo Mew Mew likely opened a whole bunch of doors for girls to be into CNC.

This is, by the way, normal.

Completely so.

These stories often talk about the girlhood experience. And girls and teenage girls are interested in all of these things. They’re interested in sex, romance, their bodies growing up, their own sexuality and the likes. It’s no wonder same-sex relationships and romance get included, they’re part of what experiencing the world through the eyes of a young girl is like.

And subsequently, it stands to reason that as people who engaged with MG grow up - they find comfort in exploring their sexuality through Magical Girl themselves. There’s a reason why there’s a growing section of “Magical Girl” in your local hentai site.

“Men get off on corrupting this wholesome girl targeted genre” is actually TERF rhetoric sneaking through the mainstream. It ignores AFAB ppl and gender nonconforming people, who grew up with Magical Girls, simply using a medium that originally started their journey of sexual identity, to explore more “grown up” aspects of that same identity.

In particular, I’m a Cis AroAce Woman. I wrote a lot of Magical Girl NSFW when I first started writing NSFW Twitter threads. They’re bad and they’re cringey. But it was something I needed.

Magical Girls were a huge part of my childhood and early teens. When I was mentally in the space to want to engage with NSFW content: it was obvious I would turn to what first sparked excitement.

So this idea that “men are corrupting Magical Girls with their sick fantasies” is nothing more than TERF-lite propaganda. People, including women and men, have been doing this for ages; for a variety of reasons. And doing so, doesn’t rob children of their spaces - but the gentrification of the internet is a story of another day.

The other argument I have heard is that GOMG is a mockery of the genre. Which is even more laughable in my opinion.

PART 2: Parodies and why I hate Earth Defender’s Club.

Gushing Over Magical Girls loves Magical Girls. It’s a parody, in a way, but it knows very well what it parodies. It’s not surface level in the slightest. And it absolutely is not mean spirited about it.

A lot of the time, shows that reference and parody the Magical Girl genre, do so in ways that feel like they view it as a lesser genre. They take generic images of cute girls in frilly outfits, swap the colors around, and have them chant over-the-top spells. You’re meant to laugh, not only at how silly they look, but people who would love it. Especially if they’re grown ups.

I do not like “Cute High Earth Defense Club LOVE!” For this exact reason - even tho many people praise it to all heavens.

Because

1) It feels surface level in its commentary and depiction of Magical Girls and

2) More mocking towards the genre than paying homage or doing anything with it.

The continuous use of the word “Love” is a very obvious jab at Magical Girls using these words, which feels mean spirited just for the sake of it. Their outfits are almost exactly the same, save for the colors. And they all use the same sticks as weapon, with no thematic link for the shapes of the scepters. The mascot too (a wombat for god knows what reason), I think it’s meant to be a joke of some sort for how ridiculous some of the mascots for the girls get, which rubs me the wrong way.

In general, it feels shallow and mean spirited. But no one calls this an insult to Magical Girls. Because people who like it don't actually care about Magical Girls. They see cute boys doing silly things and love it. Which is kinda sad.

Now, Gushing Over Magical girls has sort of that same problem on the Tres Magias…But they’re not the protagonists. And even then, in later chapters, they get power ups that are different in design, and thematically linked.

The protagonist, and the ones we follow, are Utena and the girls. And they all have very distinct outfits, all with motifs that are tangentially thematically linked, and speak of each character’s personalities in interesting ways.

Utena in particular has THIS outfit. Which a lot of people don’t like, but I actually do.

It’s very obvious it’s taking inspo from other iconic Bad Girls in the genre. Namely, Utau, Kraehe and Devil Homura. All “Enemy characters” that have unhealthy obsessions with other characters. In particular, I think the wings and the feathers resemble Homura - THE character known to have a massive obsession with a Magical Girl (Madoka), to the point of insanity.

There’s also Magia Azure. Who’s a clear reference to the Mean Tsundere girl that is iconic to the genre. She’s also a Miko. Which is a callback to Sailor Mars, arguably THE girl who popularized this archetype.

I also love what they do with the mascots. Unlike Earth Defenders, where the mascot is you know, a mockery of the archetype of a mascot - useless, only there to give power ups, and obsessed with food - the mascots of GOMG is taking a book from Madoka.

It considers the mascots both all-too-powerful and yet limited in their reach. Which is exactly what the mascots have always been in Magical Girls. Beings so powerful they can give mythical powers to girls, yet helpless to do anything on their own. So, they use magical girls as a vehicle to achieve their goals. Most Magical girls try to paint this as a good thing, but newer genres shine light on how dangerous that can be too.

Madoka tackles it with Kyubey as the main initial mascot, only later to turn out to be the villain of the series.

And in a Post-Madoka world, trusting the mascots is just the slightest bit more difficult. That’s why, from the get go, GOMG portrays their mascots as morally corrupt. He’s not a good character, he’s malicious and doing more harm than good. But for the majority of the series, he’s painted more as a useless harmless evil than anything genuinely terrifying or worthy of concern. The attention is focused on other things.

But I love the way that it’s heavily implied that they’re not good. It’s a very interesting take on the mascot and it helps with the themes of the series. Which yes, by the way. Gushing Over Magical Girls has themes.

Which lead me to-

Part 3: Yeah, uhm, Gushing Over Magical Girl has themes.

There’s this idea that Sex is an inherently violent act. In which a man humiliates and sodomizes a woman, and therefore the woman is exploited in some way. And 10x worse is any act that involves BDSM. It’s violence; born out of hatred.

This is TERF rhetoric. I’m not joking. This line of thought leads directly to TERF ideas.

Many on the internet have pointed out as much, and BDSM members have gone to be very vocal about it. In particular, people on the role of the submissive (or the bottoms) are loudly trying to explain the contrary. How they like the act of sex, like the idea of being vulnerable, or being humiliated. There’s also plenty of LGBT+ stories that talk about it, both in western and eastern spaces. Just jump into the section of dom/sub verse at your local manga browsing website, and you’ll find something.

That said, the same is not as common for people who like to “dominate”.

I can only think of two pieces of media that argue that, whoever is the dominant or the sadist, is also a human being. That whatever they’re doing is done, not out of hatred for the submissive or an act of violence, but love.

One, is the husky and the white cat. In which Mo Ran, among other things, has to come to terms that his love isn’t “pure”. That he cannot love someone without the want to have sex, and to completely dominate that someone.

The second one is Gushing Over Magical Girls.

It’s very clear to me that Utena’s sadism isn’t a violent act. It’s an act born out of love. She genuinely loves the Magical Girls, and most girls for that matter, and whenever she is inflicting pain and fighting with them - what she wants is to ultimately help them in some way.

She wants them to “be the cutest version they can be” and wants them to shine brighter than ever.

There’s this one scene I love, around chapter 20, in which Baiser (Utena) is fighting Magia Azura. And due to Baiser going a bit too far, Azura ends up being Mind-broken. She crawls towards her, calls her “mistress” and begs to become her servant.

In any normal Hentai you’ll find, this is a good thing. This would be the ideal outcome. A character being turned into nothing but a sex slave for the enjoyment of the dominant.

Which is why I found it breathtaking when that didn’t happen.

Baiser is horrified by this. She does not want to break the girls, she wants them to be powerful. She wants them to win. With her, the evil one, being nothing more than a vehicle for them to be even stronger than before.

This is the first time I’ve ever seen dominant or sadist characters being presented both sexually, and in such a positive light. Much less a queer woman in the same position.

It doesn’t treat BDSM sex as a disgusting taboo act, but something born out of genuine love - and a want to see the other person be or feel better.

This is reinforced around chapter 25 where Leberblume and Loco Mùsica are fighting Baiser. For context, Loco Musica wanted to be an Idol, but had terrible singing. She uses her evil power to basically force everyone to listen to her sing (which is so reminiscent of Mermaid Melody btw). When they fight, Baiser wins, and is then set to use her new found power to “punish” Loco Musica.

Originally, Loco Musica points out how Baiser’s sadistic tendencies are “the same” as Lord Enorme, who we’ve seen uses sadism as a genuine form of punishment. Something to avoid. You behave well, because you don’t want to get hurt or humiliated by her.

However, when Baiser uses her own unique type of sadism on Loco Musica, something happens. Instead of causing her physical pain by beating her or using violence, she forces her to get naked and perform her idol song like that. This causes her to get extremely embarrassed. And in the process, she actually starts to sing really well.

This is important for two reasons

1) Baiser is actually taking into account who Musica is. It’s later revealed that Musica wanted a more frilly idol-like outfit but Lord Enorme shut it down, for the sake of a more ‘unified’ aesthetic. Baiser is not just throwing around the same treatment and punishment for all girls - what one might like, the other might hate.

2) At the end of the day, while she did the punishment, it was both embarrassing, but ultimately something that helped Musica and made her feel better.

And that’s really the key here, and why I love the series.

Sadism, sex and kinks in general are not tools of degeneracy. They’re treated as part of our experience.

Also, it’s just fun?

Part 4: Gushing Over Magical Girls is just extremely fun when you don’t have a dumb bitch yapping abt how unholy it is to see tiddies on a screen

Yeah, GOMG just has one of the most creative depictions of the most insane of kinks you’ll see - I could spent hour gushing over Nero Alice.

Seeing all these different kinks being depicted as powers and abilities that these characters have - and seeing how they interact with other people is just interesting.

The sex scenes are both hilarious and kinda sexy. Specially if you do like to see women all hot and bothered. Personally I’m not into girls (or anyone for that matter) but I have to admit the scenes were pretty hot. And there is no shame in admitting as much. No matter what the puritanical Christian on Twitter crying abt “god honoring lesbian sex” Will tell you.

I cannot begin to explain just how hype and relatable it was to see Magia Baiser defeat Lord Enorme with the power of straight up delusion, we STAN.

So, yeah.

It’s been a while since I last saw a Magical Girl Show so unashamed of being a Magical Girl Show. Unashamed of being weird, of praising the genre and just enjoying it.

My essay is titled, in part, as a joking reference to my much more popular series “MLB is the worst thing to happen to the magical girl series”. Which I still think is true.

And while, yeah, maybe GOMG isn’t the best thing to come out of the genre…I still think it’s good that it came out.

A lot of people say they want a more “mature” take on Magical Girls but - this proved to me that just isn’t the case.

Gushing over magical girls proves that the Magical Girl Genre Can Be so much more than what people think. More than glitter and sparkles, more than vapid action scenes, or what little girls want.

Much like any other genre, it can be raunchy, it can be messy, it can explore things outside of the status quo. But it can still deeply respect the source material, and the origins of it.

GOMG proves Magical Girls can be fun. Just. Straight up fun. Regardless of your age. They can serve and connect you to parts of yourself you didn’t realize you could connect to.

I hope it proves to more people that the genre can be so much more than “just for little girls” that parodies can be more than pointing and laughing, and that it can have themes beyond just, “friendship”.

Magical Girls can be so much more. You just, have to have an open mind about it.

[inawickedlittletown]

Oh boy. This is the last text post I write tonight. I swear. I just...I have a theory.

First off, Oliver Stark...what the hell is wrong with you? Those interviews...and the IG story he already deleted. eek.

And okay so people saying he wasn't happy with bucktommy and even with working with LFJ...maybe you were all right about that. But I think this is actually deeper.

I think something changed as late as this week.

We know that 8x06 was shot before 8x05 and every interview coming out after 8x04 about both 8x05 and 8x06 (yes the ones from Oliver) had some pro-bucktommy stuff in them. He was vague and he talked about how much he enjoyed those episodes. He said "if Buck and Tommy were ever on a break" and he talked about not knowing if Tommy was his forever partner or something...everything was there's hurdles and things for them to deal with and it just didn't imply break up or that things wouldn't be worked out...

So here's my theory now that I've had time to think about it.

I fully think the break up in 8x06 was written as temporary. I think we weren't going to see Tommy in 8x07 or 8x08 and we were going to be left wondering about Buck's decision on if he wanted Tommy back over the winter hiatus. And Oliver sort of says that too...that Buck will struggle with blocking his number or reaching out type of thing...so maybe we'll see that.

I think the decision was made...and maybe it came from the network...maybe it was the writers and Tim who knows but I think sometime between last episode and this one they decided to shift paths and not go forward with the bucktommy storyline...the romcom. This could even be as a result of the election. It's possible.

LFJ in his interviews comes off like he didn't expect it to end here. But if those interviews were already set before the decision came down then he had to do them and firmly close the door and explain his exit. It's what he was probably told to do. Doesn't change how odd it is for a non-main actor to do an exit interview. Has anyone else ever done one for a side-character?

As for Oliver...I find it very interesting how he went down the line of Buck is free to sleep around. Like it's such an interesting talking point. In no way am I condoning what he said or defending it, but it is a big switch from how he's talked about Buck being bi before...it feels a little like since bucktommy isn't happening Oliver is jumping at the only non-buddie thing for Buck to do. And as a straight white guy why wouldn't he say something like that without a second thought.

So yeah...I think they pulled the plug on bucktommy for one reason or another and that's why the interviews are like that. But narratively...they'll do some hand waving and make Buck decide he actually didn't love Tommy instead of following the threads they've left there.

[miss-oranje-disco-dancer]

sweet dreams

pairing: james sunderland x reader? (written in third person pov, v ambiguous description of nameless woman)

cws/tags: smut, p in v, cheating? or is it?, not proofread, weird vibes and a little dark ig, but it's just the mood of the game

summary: james re-enters heaven's night and finds a woman who seems to remember him. he does not remember her. basically if maria successfully seduced him except it's not maria?

a/n: what is going on in this fic? idk

wc: 1.4k

Mary’s body lies cold in the backseat despite the blanket covering her. He will not find her in the gardens, the old apartment, or any hotel room. Only in a videotape in which she turns to static before it ends. 

The only warmth he has is the jacket he wears. Until he returns to Heaven’s Night. A certain familiarity struck him when he entered the building for the first time. Maybe it’s the stench of liquor, drawing him toward another reality, one void of grief. Maybe it’s the neon lights, the metal pole, a discarded bra. Maybe he’s been here before. The woman sitting at the bar looks at him as if he has. 

“James,” she says with an inviting smile. 

“How do you know my name?” he asks, taking cautious, yet steady steps in her direction. 

“How does anyone know anyone else’s name?” 

“Is that a riddle?”

“No, that was just a question. I’m not trying to trick you, James. I learned your name when you introduced yourself to me.”

“I don’t remember doing that. I don’t remember meeting you at all.”

“You’ve forgotten me already?” Her expression drops, every part of her face is disappointed. 

“I’m sorry. I’m just going through a lot right now. Don’t take it personally.” He finds himself reaching out his hand and placing it on her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. 

“Let’s start over,” he suggests. 

She nods and pulls herself together. 

He holds out his hand, and she takes it into her own. Her hands are soft minus the sharp tips of her acrylic nails that tickle his skin. 

“You’re cold,” she remarks, and he cannot decide if her pout pities or mocks him. 

“No, I’m James,” he says, forcing the creases of his lips to turn upwards into something resembling a smile. “Remember?”

“Of course,” she says with a breathy giggle. 

“Now, how about you tell me your name?”

“You know people like me don’t give out our real names, don’t you?”

People like you… it takes him a moment to realize what she means: sex workers. 

“Oh. That’s right. But I’m guessing you have an alias or something.”

“I’ve been called many names. ‘Angel’ when I’m here at Heaven’s Night, ‘Kitty’ at The Catwalk, ‘Jade’ at Jewels, ‘Baby’ by some former lovers. Call me whatever you like.”

Choosing someone else’s name was not something he’d prepared for and it leaves him stumped for a moment. 

“Don’t overthink it,” she says cupping his cheek with her hand. “As long as it’s not Mary…” 

“Why not Mary?” He flinches at the sound of her name. 

She pretends like she didn’t hear him, and pays no mind to his nerves, shrugging them off as she leads him to a seat in front of the stage. 

He follows her, eyes stuck on her curves. He startles when she pushes him onto the loveseat. 

“James, baby,” she says, her voice softer, but just as sultry. “Why are you so nervous? You want this, don’t you?”

“I just feel like I shouldn’t, that’s all.”

“Your mind is playing tricks on you, then. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to see what a woman has to offer. It’s like window shopping, there’s no harm in looking.”

Before he can say anything else she finds a boombox in the corner and sets it up - in doing so, she leans over and reveals a tiny strip of lace underneath her skirt. 

James tries to quickly adjust his pants as she’s turned away from him, but she must know he’s hard. What’s the point in pretending?

When she steps onto the stage, she needs no introduction, only the opening synth of Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) to lead her up the short set of stairs before she walks around the pole, prepared to do tricks that James’ imagination couldn’t conjure up even if he begged it to. But despite his amazement at the way her body bends, even more so when her clothes begin to disappear, it’s the moment she sits at the front of the stage and spreads her legs, giving him a better view of the red lace thong he got a peek at earlier, that really gets him going. 

He didn’t know he was hungry until he was starving. 

The music doesn’t stop, the cassette runs its course. The scantily-clad woman straddles James’ lap, just hovering but close enough to feel the warmth emanate from her body. 

“I know I said it’s just looking, but there wouldn’t really be any harm in touching me, would there?” 

She takes his hands in hers and places them on her chest. 

He can feel her tits, her skin, her heartbeat. She’s so warm, and real, and alive. There is the childlike urge to squeeze them, to hold and let go, make them bounce in front of his eyes, but instead, he slides his hands down her waist to her hips, sitting her firmly in his lap. 

“You’re so warm,” he says without thinking. 

“I’ll be cold soon if you leave me like this,” she says. Then, leans down to whisper in his ear, “Take off your clothes.”

When he asks, “are you sure?” it stumbles out of his mouth and lands with a groan as she peppers kisses down his neck.  

She only hums in response. He removes his jacket and unbuttons his shirt so her mouth can reach further – to his collarbone, while her hands travel to his poorly-hidden erection. 

She looks up at him and bats her eyelashes before going any further. It’s her way of asking permission. 

“I guess… as long as we don’t go too far…”

“We’ll just get naked, maybe even kiss, nothing more,” she says. 

So, he helps her get his pants off and she slips off her barely-there panties. 

He feels alive for the first time in years when her warm body touches his, skin-to-skin. 

He doesn’t protest when she kisses him, he closes his eyes and lets himself feel something other than dread for once. 

She surely feels his need prodding at her core, but she must feel his guilt as well because she assures him, “If it slips in by accident, then, it’s nobody’s fault, right?”

“Right,” he says, completely under her spell, nodding along. 

Of course there are no accidents. This is a mistake, not an accident. James knows this, but when she repositions her hips, he lets her wet heat envelope his cock. 

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to…” she says, a tiny grin peeking through her faux-apology. 

“It’s okay, I’ll just pull out,” he says. And slowly, with a grunt, he does. 

He keeps a tight grip on her hips so he can guide her back to him. “You can sit back down now,” he says, with his cock ready to enter her again. 

“We’ll do better this time,” she says, rubbing her folds teasingly along his shaft before gripping it and sliding it inside her. 

“Sorry, it just, you know, slipped in,” he says, almost believing his own lies. 

“But it’s only the tip. It barely even counts, right?”

“Yeah, that’s right.” The music covers up his heavy breathing and her soft moans. But James makes sure she can hear him when he says, “You’re so wet, it’s only natural for it to slide right in.” He fills her in one thrust and it finally drags a long-held back groan from him. 

They can’t make more silly excuses when they’re both breathless as she bounces up and down on his cock at a steadily increasing pace. He holds her like he fears he’ll lose her and buries his face in her neck as if muffling any moans would take away any of the guilt. 

But he’s shameless when he asks if he can cum inside her, and she’s quick to say, ‘yes’. 

Though he’s as warm as ever, he shudders through his climax. After being pent-up for so long, he has a dizzyingly intense orgasm. What keeps him grounded is each squeeze of her walls around him and the sting of her nails digging into his skin as she cums at the same time he does. 

The guilt returns along with confusion when she stands back up to get dressed. He follows her lead, but once his shirt is halfway-buttoned, he freezes, looking over at her for some sort of explanation, some sort of direction. 

“What?” she asks, brushing off her skirt as she sits down at the bar. 

“Nothing. I just- I don’t think we should’ve done that.”

“Don’t feel guilty, James. You said you were looking for someone, and you found someone.”

“No, I meant I was looking for-”

“Love? Comfort? Absolution?” She laughs differently now. “You won’t get those here.”

“No, for my wife…”

“Mary?”

“Yeah, do you know her?”

“Not anymore.”

Like everything else, she is swallowed up by the fog. 

[uzumaki-rebellion]

Spinning the Block (Prologue)

Pairing: Terry Richmond x Officer Jessica "Jess" Sims

Summary: Terry relives his final moments in Shelby Springs.

"I got no time for compromise

Don't bother me

You're all the same, just a bunch of lies

O can't you see?"

Bad Brains—"Don't Bother Me"

Adrenaline rushing through Terry's body didn't help the bloody shotgun wound in his side from clotting up.

He drove as fast as he could on a blown tire with a wounded officer bleeding out from his femoral artery right next to him. Officer Marston's lips turned blue, and his pale skin looked clammy and cold. Behind Terry's seat, drugged out of her mind, Summer McBride cowered and whimpered. All three knew that an abrupt ending to their lives loomed on the horizon.

He crossed over the grassy highway divider, trying to keep control of the car as the blown tire hindered their progress getting to the hospital. It kept pulling to the left, and he fought with the steering wheel. The flopping sound of the tire remains striking the road and the loud thunk of the rim grinding on pavement reverberated in his teeth. He felt every vibration, bounce, and grind, but he willed the vehicle to hold on a few miles more.

He glanced at the passenger seat. Marston clung to life, riding on the fuel of fear and imminent death. The officer twisted the channel on the police radio. More trouble raced in their direction. Two police vehicles screeched behind him and stayed on his ass.

Chief Burnne's black unmarked police truck blew past him, slowing down Terry's momentum. This was it. He glanced at Summer in the rearview, and her forlorn expression had gone past giving up hope. The thought of losing her daughter shined in tear-streaked eyes.

A familiar Crown Vic zoomed along his left flank. His intense jade eyes locked on Officer Jessica Sims' hardened gaze. They stared at one another for only five seconds, but each second stretched into every minute he interacted with her from the beginning.

At the start of his horrific journey in Shelby Springs, he originally thought Officer Sims was the only bright light of hope to clear up the transgressions against him. Most of his family believed in ACAB all day, but he was a former marine vet who tried to have some understanding of why his own people tried to work within the system. Hell, he once trained marines to uphold American values and protect American citizens. He approached Officer Sims with that energy, a kindred spirit trying to do right by fellow citizens as a Black American.

She played everything by the book from jump, and the way her eyes looked at him with compassion made him think she would do the right thing by him.

Fool him once.

Dassit.

Still, she followed the rules like he did with his former work, believing in a righteous chain of command. Unfortunately, she seemed clueless to what her department had been doing for a few years with all the civil forfeitures. Or maybe she was in on it. Perhaps turned a blind eye to keep her job and not get bullied by all the men on her squad. No matter, in the end, she chose a side.

The wrong one.

His eyes narrowed, and he glared at her with the disappointment of a thousand Black ancestors witnessing yet another betrayal by one of their own. In another time or place, he might've asked her out for drinks and dancing at a zydeco bar he frequented. She was the type of woman he liked, big-boned and plush all over. Not easily pushed around. Built for a large man like him. Yeah buddy, if none of this small town racist bullshit had popped off, Terry would've scooped that pretty woman up and sweet-talked her into letting him drop the hammer on that ass. Alas…

Officer Sims turned her gaze forward. He braced for impact because he knew she was going to jack them up and get them killed. Sometimes Black people were their own oppressors when they believed in the American lie. Justice didn't come to his people, and that Black woman didn't care.

Wayment.

Sims gunned the cruiser ahead of him. The police radio crackled with the voices of the cops behind him.

"Looks like she overshot…we got a ticking clock here… give it another go or I'll do it myself here…" a cop droned with a nasal drawl.

Sims clipped the left side of Chief Burnne's vehicle and he veered off to the left. Her cruiser flew off the road, barely missing a tree.

"Great shot… we're 10-59," the cop behind them said.

"What's a 10-59?" Terry asked.

Marston mustered what energy he had left and said, "That's an escort."

One of the cop cars behind him gassed it to the front of Terry. Protection.

Summer wept behind him and Marston passed out. Terry kept driving and praying it wasn't another trick. He had no patience for fuckery anymore. De-escalation had been his saving grace, but his remaining nerves were frayed and poised to explode. The weight of Mike's death hovered over his spirit.

He drove close to the hospital emergency room doors and leaped out of the police cruiser. The back left tire caught fire from the road friction. He ignored it. Summer opened the back passenger door. He lifted and carried her past the swooshing doors. Placing her on a gurney, he snatched up a fire axe he found inside the hospital and dashed back outside. He hurried to the police cruiser and popped the trunk from the driver's side. Glancing at the setup, he struck the dashcam recorder twice and yanked it out. Rushing back inside the hospital, his mind whirred with all the thoughts of what to do next. He would hold on to that dashcam until he had a lawyer present. All the truth rested within it. If he had to shed blood to keep it away from the Shelby Springs police department goons, he would go fucking Rambo on their asses.

The comedown hit him like a sledgehammer. Tears. Shouts of release. Everything he held inside to keep from snapping poured out. He watched more police arrive. Authorities from a different department bumrushed the hospital emergency entrance.

Chief Burrne's, handcuffed and bleeding through a bandage on his forehead, passed him by with Officer Sims escorting him to treatment. Terry clutched the dashcam to his chest, waiting for his representation to arrive. Several cops observed him from a distance.

He glanced up and Sims latched onto his gaze. Her soft brown eyes seemed full of regret and sympathy for his situation. She may have double-crossed him that one time, but the woman looking at him now simmered with self-doubt at her part in the entire fiasco. In the end, she did the right thing, saving their lives.

"Terry Richmond?"

An older white man in a crisply pressed gray suit approached him with another county deputy.

"I'm Lloyd Webber, your attorney. I've worked with Officer Marston."

Terry nodded, stood, and followed the man outside.

He glanced back at Officer Sims. Other cops surrounded her and asked questions. Terry wanted to wish her well with whatever happened next, but he had to focus on the dashcam evidence and get justice for his cousin, himself, and all those other people unjustly harassed and abused by the Shelby Springs Police Department.

One day, he would spin the block and see Jess again.

He needed answers and closure with her.

Part 1 HERE.

Masterlist

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[angstywaifu]

Black Dahlia - 17. Jealousy

Summary: Xaden and Garrick get their squads together to train, leading to some jealousy with someone unexpected.

A/N: I'm so sorry for the long delay on Dahlia. Kinktober took priority, but we are back in full force. I wrote so many parts in the last 24 hours for this, and I can't wait for you guys to see what I'm building up to in a few parts! Garrick Tavis x OC (Dahlia Aetos)

Black Dahlia Masterlist | Masterlist

“I don’t know why you won’t give him a chance.” Liz says in an airy tone.

I turn to see her staring at Garrick and Xaden who have gone shirtless for their sparring warm up. And she wasn’t the only one. There were more cadets here than normal for our night training session. Since bonding dragons it seemed a lot of the first years were wanting to make sure they kept their seat. And every single girl in the room was starting at them.

I can’t help but let my eyes wander as I look over at them. Garrick was by far the most muscular guy in the quadrant. As if every muscle had been carved from stone. I shake my head in attempt to get those thoughts out of my head before turning back to watch Imogen spar with another first year.

“I won’t give him a chance, because he won’t give me a chance.” I reply bitterly.

“I mean, can you blame the guy? You’ve seen how your brother and father treat the other marked ones.” Liz murmurs, still lost in a trance as she watches them spar.

“I am not my brother and my father.” I nearly snap at her, my typical anger rising to the surface at being compared to them.

“Trust me, we know. Even if you were an angsty bitch when we first met you.” Austin teases from my other side, dodging my attempt to shove her away.

“Thanks? Not sure if that was a compliment or an insult.” I say as I narrow my eyes at her slightly.

”Let’s go with both.” Bodhi says as he walks over and joins us, Garrick and Xaden close behind him.

I keep my eyes focused on Bodhi as I jokingly glare at him, but out of the corner of my eye I feel Garrick staring at me. Ever since our interaction in the hallway I’d felt his eyes on me more. Almost as if challenging me to take the bait he’d laid out the other day. Which I was not. Yes I could admit he was attractive, especially while he stood there shirtless with his freaking muscles on full display as they glisten with a slight sheen of sweat. But even if I did get along with him, I was not becoming another notch in his bed post.

”Alright everyone, pair up with someone and start going through some weapon practice.” Xaden advises as he looks over us.

Tonight both his and Garrick’s squads were training together. Apparently a good way to broaden our training by going up against people we didn’t really know. Naturally Imogen tagged along even though she wasn’t in either squad. She made a habit of turning up whenever we were here. She kept saying it was coincidence, but I was starting to think it really wasn’t. Our squads start pairing off, Liz and Austin pairing up as if on auto pilot. They worked well together as they were a similar skill level, often complaining Bodhi and I were too difficult to go up against.

I go to follow Bodhi, but a large figure steps into my path and I’m forced to look up at Garrick. ”How about you and I pair up little Aetos?” His voice laced with a mocking tone as he looks down at me.

I roll my eyes and scoff at him. “No thanks, wouldn’t want to catch something from being too close to you.” I snap back, causing Bodhi and Imogen to snicker at my comment, Xaden’s eyes going wide as he looks between us.

”You’re just scared I’ll finally show you up.” He mocks, arms crossing over his chest as he cocks his head to the side.

An idea forms in my head. A stupid idea. And I silently hope he doesn’t follow through with it as the words leave my mouth. “If you’re so confident about that maybe you should challenge me once challenges start back up. Unless you’re scared I’ll prove you wrong again?”

Another round of snickers pick up around us, Garrick’s brow furrowing as he glares down at me. Clearly me proving him wrong all those weeks ago was still a sore spot for him, and I couldn’t help but smirk at him before pushing past him and dragging Bodhi with me.

”You know he’s going to end up doing that and he’s going to kick your ass in front of everyone?” Bodhi whispers as I lead us over to a spot on the far side of the room.

”He’s not going to kick my ass in front of everyone.” I throw back at him as I grab a sword from the weapons rack.

I turn around to see Bodhi looking at me like I’m an idiot. “Clearly you don’t know him very well, or you’re delusional on the size difference between you two.”

”And he also doesn’t know me very well.” I point out, Bodhi eyeing the sword I’m waving around cautiously as if worried I’m going to hurt him or myself with it.

”Maybe if you-”

”Nope, not happening.” I say before settling into a fighting stance.

Bodhi clearly takes it as a sign this conversation wasn’t going any further, his shoulders sagging in defeat before walking over to grab his own sword. As soon as he settles into a fighting stance I launch myself at him, Bodhi flailing to keep up with me. Each of my strikes fuelled with the hint of anger that had risen to the surface from my interaction with Garrick and words with Bodhi.

Bodhi didn’t deserve how hard I was going at him, but I needed to let out my frustrations somehow. Everyone was so adamant I give the lumbering oaf a chance. But why should I when he wouldn’t give me one? Since the day I’d walked across the parapet, he’d made up his mind about me. Had lumped me in with my brother and father without even a second thought.

Poor Bodhi is quick to succumb to my attacks, my leg kicking his out from beneath him as he falls to the floor with a loud thud as his sword clangs loudly on the ground as I point the tip of mine at his neck.

Bodhi just shakes his head and laughs. “Remind me to never piss you off again.”

”You’ll be fine.” I tease as I move my sword from his neck as I hold out my free hand to him.

He grasps his around mine before pushing off the ground to help me pull him up. Clearly still wobbly from his fall he stumbles into me as he rights himself, causing him and I to laugh at his clumsiness.

“You sure? I nearly just made a fool of myself by nearly sending us plummeting to the floor.”

”Wouldn’t be the first time you’ve made a fool of yourself.”

Bodhi laughs as he playfully shoves me away before releasing my hand and heading over to get a drink of water from his pack. As he moves my eyes fall on Garrick who hasn’t moved an inch, except to turn and look over at us. But for once his glare and eyes aren’t trained on me. They’re focused on Bodhi. And it almost looks like he wants to murder him.

@imtoanonymousforyou @simplyme-fornow @omalmal @lalaluch @wolfbc97 @leptitlu @fullmoon-94 @the-fandom-ness @fan-of-many-bands @awkardnerd

[kyriathanatos]

i want to make it clear that i do not believe in doomerism about this stuff and that its not going to be as bad as everyone is saying. (but it is going to be bad in ways we haven't quite grappled with or predicted yet in these moments of hurt and thats important to understand.)

but i've been following this stuff for over 10 years. i was there at proto gamergate shit in 2012-2013, and i knew it was a grift back then. i charted the way that young white men were getting radicalized and i told everyone i knew what i saw coming. i was laughed at and told that would never happen. then he won in 2016, and i told people what was coming from that, as i'd seen their playbook years before. they told me i was doomsaying and it wasn't going to happen. then he lost in 2020 and even i thought maybe i was wrong, even though i noticed the trend of the general discourse and online communities and especially young white men trending right.

i've said what would happen since all the way back then and the last 10+ years have proven me right in every single time in every single way.

all this is to say that i can't be the bastion of hope and make the platitudes of "we can get through this" that everyone else is. they're right! we can, and we will. i don't want to endorse doomerism. but i'm tired. so tired. tired in my bones. i can't be that person right now. and i'm sorry if that makes you think less of me.

[epickiya722]

Sometimes, I forget that there are people who find protagonists like Izuku, Tanjiro and Yuji "boring" because "they exhibit typical shonen protagonist traits" and one of them woukd be "They're nice, they're kind, they're all sunshine".

Which, okay, have your tastes, that's fine.

But when it comes to characters who are kind and/or nice, there's layers to them.

Just because a character is nice, doesn't mean they're kind and vice versa.

A character can be the most evil one in that story and still show kindness to some people somehow. A nice character may be the one to do immoral things, Yuji being an example.

The reasons for why a character is nice and/or kind varies, too.

Some are just genuinely born that one. Some may be selective as to who they show those sides, too, because of their own morality. Maybe, a character is being kind or nice to also manipulate others. Some characters may choose to be kind because who will, despite the cruelty of the world?

Also, I feel like, even with people outside of a fandom, they hear or seen a character being nice and kind, they just stop at that and don't think they're capable of being ruthless.

Like, Tanjiro canonically has a pure soul, but multiple times he has shown he is not only a menace in a fight, but he has shown to be one in casual situations. Sometimes, he's not even aware he is because he is so nice.

Izuku, he's a sweetheart, too. But even he will just shut off that "sunshine" to literally tear into you. He has been told in canon to hold back his emotions, the most prominent one being his anger. When he's angry, go apologize!

Yuji, look, let's be real... he is sunshine and rainbows, but that boy is probably the least sweetest one out of these three examples. Hold back? Yuji don't know what that is. No, no, he really don't. I kid you not, this kid doesn't. You can't even use the fight against Junpei as one because he punched Junpei UP into a window. Had Junpei not have that shikigami, he would have gotten major injuries.

My point is!

Just because a character is kind or nice or both, it doesn't mean...

A) it's the only trait they have.

B) they're not capable of not being kind or nice.

I think some see nice and kind and associate it with being "soft" in a derogatory manner.

Which, first off, there's nothing wrong with being soft.

I'll be honest, it will sound silly (go ahead and laugh actually, I encourage it), but if you asked put a character like one of the mentioned protagonists in front of me along with their villain and asked me "who I'm more scared of" I'm pointing at the protagonist.

Listen to me. Don't let that cuteness fool you.

With a villain, I am well aware of that villain being evil and will hurt me no matter what I do.

With someone like Yuji or Tanjiro or Izuku, they look nice, they look kind but it's like you have to be careful to not to trigger them in a way to set them off. You're caught off guard but those sweet faces and then next thing you know, BOOM! You got knocked out.

If anything, as much as people like to clown on these characters, they're only just following the footsteps of the ones before them.

Just like those legends, they started from the bottom and grew stronger over time and even with being a chill person or don't want to do evil, that doesn't exempt them from being not "a sweetheart".

I said it before, but a sunshine character to me is a character who is warm but lethal, like sunlight.

[tinfoil-jones]

Gravity Falls: For Your Own Good, Ch. 6

Summary: A few years after moving to Gravity Falls and having his lab built, Stanford Pines happens upon his estranged twin brother, Stanley. He mentally prepared himself to be suffocated by his brothers neediness all over again - what he wasn't prepared for was Stanley walking right past him like he didn't even notice him.

Rating: M for language, violence, and adult implications

Preface: Dialogue only, but some actions will be annotated for clarity. Cross-Posted on AO3 Here

First - Prev - Next

CH.6

“Good evening, Stanley.”

“...”

“I can see in lieu of speaking, you have instead chosen to communicate with an obscene hand gesture- two obscene hand gestures. I'll excuse your immaturity because I understand you might be feeling… upset.”

“Upset? Me? What could I possibly be upset about?”

“I understand your current state of… lodging is making you apprehensive. On account of being involuntarily committed.”

“You not picking up sarcasm doesn’t surprise me. And this isn’t an involuntary commitment; this is an unlawful abduction and confinement. I have enough experience with both to know the difference.”

“You what?”

“Ask me whatever stupid questions you’re about to ask, but I refuse to stand up. This is literally the first bed I’ve had since prison; and in that bed I had to worry about bed bugs, dirty needles, poisonous snakes… and Jorge.”

“What was that last thing that you just whispered to yourself?”

“Don’t worry about it. Now, what do you want, Doc? You here to scan me again? Get me to take more drugs? Ask me weirdly personal questions like your hot friend?”

“I want to talk. I may have come on a little strong when we crossed paths in town, in order for you to truly understand where I’m coming from, I’m going to have to give you some context in place of your lost memory.”

“Please tell me you’re not about to give me the tragic backstory of you and your missing twin.”

“Listen, Stanley, you don’t remember this; but we had a falling out ten years ago.”

“Aaand you’re doing it. Yeah, that’s pretty much what I was expecting. Fine, I’ll play along.”

“We were in our senior year of high school. You ruined a project of mine, and it cost me my dream college. We had a fight, and you got- you left home after that.”

“Man, dunno why I’d do something like that.”

“You were scared of me leaving you.”

“Did a shitty thing, and ended up alone anyways. That's something I'd expect from me.”

“And then you tried to justify it and say there was a silver lining-.”

“I’m sorry.”

“...What?”

“I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that.”

“... Where’s your excuse?”

“Hm?”

“Your excuses- your reasons? You cannot just apologize- so casually.”

“Sure I can. I just did. You don't accept it, that’s your right."

“...You don’t mean that.”

“Naw, I’m pretty sure no one deserves to be betrayed. I’m sorry you were.”

“Saying sorry doesn’t make it okay.”

“Didn’t say it did. Nothing can- it’s already happened, and there’s no changing it. You don’t wanna forgive and forget? I won’t make you.”

“And you’re going to simply… move on?”

“Look, PhD, I can’t tell you why your real twin did what he did, or what was going through his head when he did it. But he did the wrong thing to the wrong person, and paid for it. It’s too bad you had to pay for it too.”

“You are-.”

“Can see why you’d get us mixed up though. All I do is ruin things, too. Maybe if that thing with your project hadn’t happened, you wouldn’t be a wackjob who carries a tranq gun with him everywhere and abducts people off of the street.”

“I’m not mixing anything up. You are exactly who I keep trying to tell you that you are. You’re just not you right now.”

“I’m never anybody but me. You feel better now? Get all of that out of your system?”

“Now that I have told you what separated us-.”

“I’m gonna take that as a no.”

“Can you fill me in on the years that followed?”

“Doc, a lot of what I remember is like smoke - it’s hazy, and it’s hard to hold onto, can you be specific?”

“How about we start with something tangible?”

“Like what?”

“I am going to slip a paper and a pen through the slot in the door. Write down a list of the people who’ve tried to kill you.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. You told my associate a number of alarming things during his interview with you, and he reported that a not insignificant number of those things revolved around people trying to kill you.”

“A lot of them still want me dead, you know. If they figured out where I was, they might raid this place. It’s not too late to just… let me go, and we can pretend none of this happened. I’m not gonna hold a grudge against you, it's clear to me you've got issues because your real twin is either dead or hiding in Cuba.”

“They can try. They’ll fail.”

"Gutsy. We coulda been friends if you weren't insane."

"...We were."

"If you say so."

To be continued...

[itstheval]

Telling the Truth

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"Why would I?"

"What? We're your-"

"Friends, yes, I know, but think about it. Think, with me. First thing I could tell you is 'We're guaranteed to win'. Cool! Blinding great. Except you'd know that winning was costing me my life. Something that seems to have upset you, even AFTER the fact!"

"Well, yes, that's because it's your LIFE! We didn't…we don't want you to die for us, Siffrin!"

"Even if it meant saving all of Vaugarde?"

"…"

"We did NOT save Vaugarde without that wish. I can tell you that with a straight face. In whatever magic realm of make believe where I don't wish, we're all standing still as statues right now. I knew that as SOON as I knew that I'd made a wish. You don't need that choice in your mind. Especially not when I'm the one who's dying…If I'm the one feeling it, it should be my choice, shouldn't it?"

"Siffrin…"

"You said first thing you could tell us. Implying there were more things." Odile's voice was stern. Cold. Steel. Good, she was the one person who could understand without her heart weeping. Maybe, just maybe, she could convince the others.

"Oh, there were plenty more things to tell you! Like how the end of the King wasn't the end of the loops? How we were trapped here, by whatever this was? Would you want to know that? That every time we won, it was just washed away like a kayak too far at sea?! Or how about everything I'd failed to do, would you want the list of that?"

"Yes."

The word cut through everything else. Her stare was impassive. Almost empty. Somehow, colder than before.

"Well, I didn't want to tell you about it. It was over a dozen loops before I found that out, and can you imagine having…having THIS conversation a dozen times? Two dozen? Watching your heart break every single time? Watching Mirabelle sob, watching Isabeau practically shut down? Just so I could have a scrap of comfort?! Any Siffrin that would do that to you is a Siffrin that wouldn't have wished at all. Any person who would destroy all of you, who would break all of your hearts, just to have two days of understanding, that person's on the path to being the next King."

"Siffrin. This was…" Odile, of all people, having to choose her words carefully. She was close to understanding. She was close to breaking. It was in her pose, her words, her face. "Not a matter of emotions, beyond a certain point. While I believe you, and your kind heart does you credit…You clearly, fundamentally, could only follow one path at a time. If you had shared your knowledge, you could have been done many loops before…We could have helped you."

"No. You couldn't."

"Oh?"

"The books that told the truth? The books that explained how bad I'd blinded myself? Written in a language only I could read! And that was AFTER I killed myself trying to speak it! The wish, to make the Head Housemaiden tell us what happened? None of you could've believed hard enough! Yeah, I could've asked you about staying together…If I'd had any reason, at all, to think that's why I was looping. NOTHING said that! That wasn't the wish I made, I wished to stay with Mirabelle. I could do that even if you all split up. It would've blinding HURT, but I could have! Nothing. Nothing at all you could have done would save me. Not until the end. Not until you DID."

"You have some proof of this?"

A thud. A book, borrowed from the House…stolen, truly, but no one there could read it, and what good was a book no one could read? A book, laying on the ground between them, the sound of it having shocked the other two from their emotional stupors.

"If you can read this…If you can tell me the title of this…I'll admit I was wrong."

Odile's hands were shaking. Odile's hands never shook. Not with the tremors of age, not with exhaustion, but now…With her fingers outstretched to the book, she was trembling. Cautious. Like it would bite her. She picked it up, turned it around, and stared at it.

Her eyes widened. Then narrowed. Flicking across the title. Opening the book, and her eyes darting back and forth. Looking for something, for anything, as even the steel in her soul bent under the weight. Her back hunched, her brow furrowed, and the signs of a headache were obvious.

A flip of the page.

Another.

Then, a scream of rage, as she tossed the book into the campfire, and fell to the ground, clutching her knees. She sobbed. The Madame, the great Odile, unflappable, steel-spined and sharp-eyed, sobbed like a lost child. It felt like the most damning victory imaginable.

"That's why I didn't tell you. How you're feeling right now. I'd do that to you, every time, for NOTHING." They had to understand, by now. Looking around, at the shattered wrecks of the three, hearing sobs and seeing blank-eyed stares, they did.

Now, only now, could the healing actually start. Now that they believed. Now that they knew. Now that they understood what hat happened, and what impossible choices there were to make. Now that it wasn't 'Silly Siffrin got mixed up in emotions, isn't it cute?', now that it wasn't 'We can talk about whatever happened, Feelings Buddy!', now that it wasn't 'Oh, your fee-fees, your ling-lings'.

Loop said to tell them the truth. They knew how much it would hurt when they said it.

Well, let's see how that works.

[yoomiwrites]

Missing Ghost²

Summary: After losing her memory in a storm, a young Marine remembers only the name “Mihawk” and sets out to find him, convinced he holds the key to her past. As she sharpens her skills and follows his trail across countless ports, Mihawk is always just out of reach. Finally, she arrives at a port where his ship waits, knowing her answers are close.

Note: Since a lot of you enjoyed the first part —or rather the Trailer???— of Missing Ghost, I'll give you the second, which explains a little more. However, this story here won't get a fixed update scedule. But I promise, whenever we hit the 30 reactions, the new chapter will follow soon. Anyways, we got some skips here and there in this chapter, which might confuse you (sorry for that) but the next ones have a smooth flow. Gotta explain her side as well before we jump into our dramatic slow-burn.

The scent of saltwater clung to the breeze as I awoke, the distant murmur of waves steady and comforting, yet unfamiliar. It felt as though I’d drifted through a dream, a long, unbroken night I couldn’t remember. The first thing I saw was the kind face of an old woman bending over me, her hand resting on my shoulder as she whispered to someone nearby, "Thank heavens, she's alive."

For a year, the faces of this little coastal town became my whole world. These people—strangers at first, though I’d come to see them as family—had found me washed up on their shore after a heavy storm. They cared for me, helped me heal. They told me I had come in on a rough tide, barely breathing. My past was blank, a black slate, as empty as the horizon.

Yet there was a restlessness within me, a flicker of something left undone. I would catch myself watching the ocean, feeling a pull toward its vastness, like an anchor somewhere deep within me, half-forgotten and buried in the depths.

I tried to ignore it, forcing myself into a routine, helping with the nets, mending sails, doing small, clumsy chores around town. The villagers laughed at my mishaps, good-natured and warm, and I laughed along with them, though a part of me always wondered why everything felt so… wrong, somehow. Like wearing clothes that didn’t fit.

And then, one evening, as I watched the sun dip below the horizon, something strange came over me—a memory, slipping into focus for just a heartbeat. It was of a man, standing tall, his eyes as sharp as a hawk’s gaze, cutting through everything they touched. His form was shrouded in darkness, yet I could sense the weight of his stare, the cool indifference he wore like a cloak.

Dracule Mihawk.

The name surged through me, as if pulled from the depths of the sea itself. It tasted familiar, filled with fear and awe, with a reverence that felt misplaced, yet urgent. His voice echoed in the back of my mind, words as cold and biting as steel: “You’re supposed to be watching me, not getting yourself killed.”

And then, like a fragile thread slipping through my fingers, the memory faded, leaving only the faintest trace, like footprints in the sand washed away by the tide.

Days passed, and I could think of little else. The name haunted me, a specter hovering at the edge of my consciousness, tugging at some long-buried duty. I tried to bury it, to shake off the strange yearning, yet each time, it returned stronger, more insistent.

Then, one night, as a storm rolled in, I felt a reckless determination rise within me. I had to know who I was—had to know why the name of a Warlord carried such weight within me, why it felt like my life had revolved around that solitary, distant figure.

As the storm thundered above, I knew what I had to do.

I packed what little I owned, slipping away before dawn. I didn’t know where I was going or if I’d even find what I sought, but I knew I couldn’t stay here, not anymore. I had to find Mihawk, to remember why he haunted my dreams. And maybe, just maybe, I’d find myself in the process.

In my heart, I could still hear the echoes of my own laugh, wild and breathless, lingering in the back of my mind like a fragment of the past I couldn’t quite grasp.

The small boat cut through the waves, though each crest grew higher and stronger, rocking the vessel with an intensity I hadn’t anticipated. For a while, I managed well enough, adjusting as the water slapped against the sides, my hands tight on the oars. I’d learned to fish out here, enough to know how to read the currents, to feel when the sea was ready to turn against you. But now, as I looked out at the dark, churning horizon, I felt a prickle of doubt.

My mind kept drifting back to him—this elusive figure who seemed to haunt my memory and my purpose. I couldn’t shake the feeling that finding him would somehow explain everything, that he held the key to the pieces I couldn’t remember. Mihawk. The name itself felt heavy, burdened with something I couldn’t name. And each time I tried to recall him, his face slipped away, features blurring into the shadows, like he was some phantom my mind had conjured.

But even though his image stayed frustratingly vague, the feeling was as sharp as ever. I knew it was real. And I knew I had to find him.

The waves rose higher, and I braced myself, leaning into each swell with a determination that was half instinct, half desperation. The salt stung my skin, the chill of the ocean seeping into my bones, but I pressed on. It had been around a year since I’d woken on that lonely shore with no memory, no past, nothing but the kindness of strangers who didn’t ask questions. And yet, beneath the surface, this pull toward something—someone—was always there, like a silent tide that had finally dragged me out to sea.

I tried to picture him again, forcing myself to concentrate. A flash of his eyes—piercing, unyielding—came to mind, and I felt my heartbeat quicken. I could almost hear his voice, cold and amused, saying once more: “You’re supposed to be watching me, not getting yourself killed.” There was no warmth in those words, yet something in them rang familiar, almost comforting, like I’d heard them countless times before.

A hard wave broke against the boat, yanking me from the memory. I gasped, feeling the boat tip precariously before I steadied it. Every time I focused on Mihawk, on those fractured glimpses of the past, the sea seemed to rise in response, as if testing my resolve. I wondered if he was as dangerous as the ocean itself, as indifferent to life and death, sweeping in and out of people’s lives without a trace. And yet, if he truly was that figure, why did I feel this pull to find him, this sense of trust mingled with wariness? It made no sense, but here I was, risking everything on a memory as thin as smoke.

Ahead, I could see the faint outline of an island, its shape barely visible against the steel-gray sky. Relief mixed with fear as I realized I was getting closer to my goal. If I could reach a port, I could ask around, maybe find someone who knew his name, or knew where he could be found. Mihawk was a Warlord; surely, someone, somewhere, would know something about him. At least that was what the kind people of my island had told me.

But as I rowed, a single question lingered, haunting me as much as his name did: If I found him, would he remember me?

I couldn’t shake the image of those intense, unreadable eyes watching me, studying me like I was some strange creature that had somehow stumbled into his world. And though the image was as unclear as the horizon in a storm, I felt a flash of defiance, of determination. If he didn’t remember me, I would make him. He was the only link to who I had been, to everything I had lost. And if I had to face the storm to get there, then so be it.

Another wave crashed against the boat, nearly knocking me back. My hands ached, but I held on, fighting the urge to look back at the safety of the shoreline far behind me. I kept my eyes forward, fixed on the island.

The dock was bustling as I arrived, my clothes soaked with sea spray, exhaustion settling into my bones. But my heart was pounding as I scanned the horizon, hoping, daring to believe that maybe, just maybe, this time he would actually be here.

I had been on his trail for what felt like forever. Each time I thought I’d caught up to him—whispers in taverns, rumors in passing, a hushed mention of “Hawk Eyes Mihawk”—I’d find nothing more than empty docks or vague traces of his presence. It was as though he was always one step ahead, a shadow slipping through my grasp. I grew used to the strange, half-maddening cycle of arriving somewhere, just a few hours too late. There’d be an empty mug in an inn, a murmur of a cloaked figure sighted in a nearby town. But never him.

At first, it had been simple enough to pick up his trail. I found myself listening intently to sailors’ tales and buying drinks for anyone with even the slightest hint of information. But as months turned into years, I learned quickly that mere words weren’t enough. I couldn’t rely on others. So, I fought. I survived, tracking down pirates and mercenaries who owed their lives to Mihawk—or feared him enough to give me scraps of knowledge, little more than breadcrumbs. With every fight, every encounter, I grew stronger, a clumsy, scattered style slowly becoming something sharper, something that could almost be called technique.

I could almost feel Mihawk’s ghostly disapproval as I fumbled my way through fights in the beginning, wielding a blade with a mixture of grit and inexperience. He was an image, a goal I couldn’t quite touch, and as time passed, I wondered if he’d simply vanish again like the dream I couldn’t remember. But something in me wouldn’t let go. He was out there. And the small memories I had of him felt realer, more vivid, as if he were watching, aware that I was on his trail, though always staying just out of reach.

Sometimes I wondered if he was avoiding me, if he had no intention of ever meeting me again. Perhaps, to him, I was nothing more than a ghost, something easily ignored and forgotten. The thought gnawed at me, but I kept going, surviving each storm and each struggle, clinging to the hope that I would find him, that I would finally learn who I was and why he haunted my memories.

And now, as I stood at the edge of this crowded port, I felt a surge of hope—and fear. His ship was docked here, the enormous black vessel unmistakable, casting a shadow over the water. People whispered in awe and fear, as if his mere presence filled the air with a kind of sharp, electric tension. There was no mistaking it; he had to be here.

I took a shaky breath, trying to ignore the thrill of adrenaline mixed with exhaustion. After all these months, all these years of following nothing but a rumor, I was finally close. Somewhere in this town, he was here. I could almost hear his voice again, cold and distant, watching me with that sharp, unreadable gaze, reminding me of how far I still had to go.

This time, I wouldn’t let him slip away.

[otherone12]

HII ITS ME AGAIN !!!! OKAY SOOOO I had this idea right... how about a super fem super cute super "girl next door" reader x basement gee ?? :3 like the whole cheerleader x loser trope !!! I think that'd be like super cute !

Wait, Are You In A Band?!

Basement!Gerard Way x Reader

-> Masterlist

HEYYY!! WELCOME BACK!!! Sorry for took too long 😭 Hope u well <3!! Okayokay, I went too literal with the "cheerleader x loser" part, because I thought it was awesome make some "high school" plot, anyways, the fic turned really longer, with fluff and angst... hope u like it! <3 (If it turned out too different from what you imagined, let me know and I'll try to fix it :) )

PS: it's 2am in my time zone, so when I'm rested I'll revise the fic better.

Summary: After a late cheer practice, you was walking home, but you herd simomething comming from your neighbor's basement. Was he... singing? Maybe he wasn't just the weirdo kid at your school.

- Word Count: 6.400

- Warnings: None :)

- Ps: I'll not use y/n…

- Ps2: I'm brazilian, so english is not my first language... sorry if i wrote something wrong.

___________________________________________

1st Person POV (reader)

Here I am, making my way to my home after hours practicing the next cheer performance. Exhausted and with my ponytail, I was almost at home, but something caught my attention, a loud song coming from one of the houses in my neighborhood. The sound wasn’t clear, but I followed it, letting go of how tired I was, walking to the house I thought the sound was coming. Surprisingly, I knew whose house was.

I knew that Gerard was my classmate since ever, he wasn’t much of a talking guy, nor did his style match with the rest of the people around here. I'm not gonna lie here, I always had a bit of curiosity about him. Not too long ago, I found out he lives three houses away from mine. Part of me wanted to ‘casually’ knock there to say ‘hi’.

At first I didn't recognize the voice, but when I approached his house I was sure that it was definitely his voice. Enchanted by the sound, I stepped the closest I could, paying attention to the song. Wasn’t just Gerard singing what seems to be an authorial song, but there's a bass, at least two guitars and drums.

Wasn’t perfect but it sounded incredible in my ears. Hypnotized by the song, I stayed there to the end of it… damn it was really good. Before I could even think, I started to hear some voices that I didn't recognize, except for Gerard’s.

- Yeah, let’s run through it one more time, - He said

- Sure! Maybe we can try the second solo we talked about. - Another voice replied

- Okay Okay, I'm gonna drink something before…

Realizing they’d catch me if I stayed any longer, I hurried back home, my mind still replaying every sound I’d just heard. I was so exhausted that I practically collapsed onto my bed, but even as I drifted off, his voice echoed in my mind.

The next morning, I couldn’t stop humming a part of the song I’d heard. It was catchy, and I kept thinking about how much I wanted to tell Gerard how incredible they sounded.

When lunchtime rolled around, I did what I normally did: sat with the other girls on the cheerleading team, surrounded by the usual crowd of football players. But today felt different. I kept glancing over to where Gerard always sat alone in the corner. His brother went to a different school, and he didn’t really have a group here. I wanted to change that, at least for a moment.

- Hey, where are you going? - one of my friends asked, confused as I got up.

- Don’t worry, I’ll be right back,- I replied, giving her a quick smile before making my way toward Gerard.

He was sitting on the floor, with his lunch next to him, while he flipped through a comic book, completely distracted. I stopped in front of him, and as soon as he noticed me, his gaze went up to my face.

- Hi! Can i sit? - I asked, hoping I didn’t startle him too much.

He took a few seconds to answer, his cheeks turned light red, and he avoided eye contact.

- Uh… s-sure - His tone was shy, but i could feel that he was a bit happy - but your uniform-

- I don't mind. - Smiling, I sat next to him, then explained. - I'll change into normal clothes after lunch anyway.

- If you say so… - a shy smile appeared on his face.

- So… Hey, I heard you singing last night.. - When these words left my mouth, what was a light blush turned into a bright red tone on his face. And his eyes wide -. I didn’t know you were in a band.

- Y-you heard?! - he exclaimed, shock evident in his expression, his eyes met mine.

- Yeah I was walking home and… well we’re neighbors… so… - I tried to explain, with a soft smile, trying not not to scare him off or something.

- Can you please not make fun of this? - He sighed, anguished - Like, yeah, sure, call me weirdo, ask for me to do your homework or else but… can you not mention this?

- Why should I make fun of it?! - Not gonna lie, i feel a bit sad for him thinking of me like this, but i almost yelled - You guys are fucking awesome!

- R-really? Do you think so? - He calmed down, but a bit suspicious - I didn’t know you were into this kind of music…

- I totally am! Do you guys perform anywhere? - I leaned closer, excitement bubbling up. - I would love to see a full show!

- Not yet… - Nervous, he stopped to think - But if you want, you can come over to my house to, y’know, watch us practice… we're going to rehearse tomorrow... if you want to stop by after your practice...

- I would love to! - My smile widened, feeling a rush of anticipation.

After our conversation, I felt a rush of excitement as I got up to head back to my friends. I cast one last glance at Gerard, who was now fiddling nervously with his comic book, his cheeks still slightly pink, but there was a smile in the corner of his lips.

As I approached the table where the cheer squad sat, they looked up, curiosity evident in their expressions.

- Hey, where were you? - my friend asked, raising an eyebrow. - Why were you talking to him?

There was a playful tone in her voice, as if she was implying that I was flirting with him.

- Yeah, what’s his name again? Gerald? - another friend chimed in, a hint of amusement in her tone. - He’s a bit weird, don’t you think?

I hesitated for a moment, considering how to respond. I didn’t want to let on that I had been intrigued by Gerard’s singing. My friends wouldn’t understand, not now, they’d just tease me about it.

- Oh, we were just discussing a class project,- I said, trying to sound casual. - You know how the teachers are always assigning those weird group projects? He has some great ideas.

They exchanged skeptical looks, and I could see they weren’t completely convinced.

- A class project? Really? - She smirked. - You’re not trying to tell me you’ve developed a sudden interest in the ‘weird kid’?

- Come on, he’s just a classmate, - I said, shrugging it off, a smile plastered on my face. - It’s not a big deal.

But inside, I felt a spark of excitement that I couldn’t quite hide. I had made a connection, and even if my friends didn’t get it, I knew I wanted to see Gerard again, especially to hear him sing.

- Yeah, sure. - She said mockingly, getting up - Let’s change our clothes and go back to class.

The rest of the day passed in a blur, but I couldn’t stop thinking about Gerard’s shy smile and the way his eyes had lit up when I told him he was amazing. That spark of excitement kept me awake longer than I’d like to admit, and by morning, I already had a plan.

The next day , I casually told the girls that I needed to leave school a bit early. But as soon as the words left my mouth, I noticed their expressions shift, mischievous smirks spreading across their faces.

- Oh, leaving early, huh? - She raised an eyebrow, leaning in. - I bet you have a date with your ‘class partner’... I mean, classmates.

- Really funny. - I rolled my eyes - It’s just… homework.

- Sure, I totally believe in it… - She mocked and I blushed - You know, if you’re into him, you can tell us! We won’t judge... much.

I laughed awkwardly, hoping no one noticed.

- C’mon I'm serious, and I gotta go. - I started to pack my things - don’t want to be late.

- Alright, fine. Go hang out with your little ‘project partner.’- Another of my friends said, laughing - Just don’t come back quoting comic books or whatever he’s into.

- See you guys tomorrow. - With a chuckle, I leave the court.

I made my way to Gerard’s house, feeling a mix of nerves and excitement. Part of me was still amazed that I was doing this, showing up at the "weird kid’s" house after practically lying to my friends about it. But I couldn’t help it; I was curious, and I wanted to see him in his basement. I knocked on the door and waited, glancing around at the worn porch steps.

The door creaked open, and Gerard stood there, his eyes widening in surprise.

- Oh, hey… you actually came!

- Of course I did,- I replied, giving him a warm smile. - I didn’t say I would if I didn’t mean it.

- Uh, C-cool - His gaze on the floor, and he seems to be nervous - Come on in, then.

As I walked into the house, I heard a voice call out from down the hallway.

- Oh, my big brother brought his cheerleader girlfriend home! - Mikey’s head popped out from around the corner, a teasing grin on his face.

- Mikey, shut up! - Gerard’s face turned bright red, and he stammered, clearly embarrassed. - She’s not- w-we’re not-

- I’m just a fan - I said with a grin, hoping it’d take the pressure off him.

- Yeah, sure. Just a fan.- He raised an eyebrow at Gerard. - Well, the others are already in the basement. I’ll grab my bass and be right down.

I followed Gerard through the house, catching a glimpse of various band posters and comic books strewn around. He opened a door leading down into the basement, where I could already hear faint sounds of tuning guitars.

As we reached the bottom of the stairs, I spotted Ray and Frank, both of whom looked up in surprise when they saw me. Ray nudged Frank, and they exchanged a smirk.

- Well, well, looks like Gerard brought his cheerleader girlfriend to watch us practice,- Frank teased, waggling his eyebrows.

- Guys, come on… - Gerard groaned, his cheeks going red again. - She’s just here to watch. For the music… y’know…

- Yep, totally for the music! - I chuckled, trying to ease him - You guys were awesome the other night!

- Oh, she’s a fan - Frank said, giving me a wink. - So, we’ve got an audience now. Let’s make it worth it!

- Guess we can’t let Gerard’s cheerleader down. - Ray laughed while tuning the guitar.

Gerard shot them both a glare, but I could see he was smiling a little. We all settled in, and as the band began to play, I couldn’t help but feel like I was exactly where I was meant to be, watching Gerard and his friends create something that felt raw, real, and amazing.

As the guys settled into their instruments, I found myself a spot on an old armchair near the back of the basement. Gerard shot me a quick, nervous glance, as if making sure I was still okay with being there. I gave him an encouraging nod, hoping to ease some of his nerves.

As they played, I was really loving the music and the way each of them put their passion into the song. The lyrics were intense and Gerard's voice was mesmerizing. As the music played, my gaze wandered around the basement, looking at the absurd amount of comic books and CDs that filled several shelves (and the floor), as well as the posters on the walls. But soon my gaze turned to Gerard, and remained analyzing every detail of his performance.

all the mannerisms, the wrinkled sweatshirt, the slightly smudged eyeliner along with the dark circles, the pink lips and the long, messy hair. When the music ended, it took me a few seconds to regain my attention, which only came out of this trance when a voice interrupted my thoughts.

Suddenly, his voice broke through my thoughts.

- So… what did you think? - he asked, scratching the back of his neck, his eyes wide and hopeful. There was this nervous little shine in them that made my heart skip.

- It was amazing! - I said, grinning as I stood up, clapping a little too enthusiastically.

- Really? - He blinked, clearly surprised, and a tiny, bashful smirk crept up at the corner of his mouth.

- Yeah! - I stepped closer, feeling the excitement bubble up. - You guys are actually really good!

- Thanks! - Frank said, giving me a grin. - You should come every time we play!

- You think so? - I asked, hesitating a bit, not wanting to seem like I was intruding.

- Totally! - Mikey jumped in. - You’re a fan, right?

- Definitely! - I laughed, though I worried about my busy schedule. - I can’t promise every time, but I’ll come as much as I can.

Gerard’s face brightened, and for a moment, he looked at me with this big, relieved smile.

- I’d love that-I mean, we’d love that. I mean, it’d be cool to, uh, have you as, like, a regular… fan… - His voice trailed off, and I watched his cheeks turn pink as he realized what he’d said.

He fumbled with his words, his hands fidgeting as he tried to recover.

- I mean, just, it’s cool when you’re around, you know? Not just, like, ‘cause you’re… - He glanced down, clearly searching for words that just weren’t coming. - …It’s just… you’re really supportive, and that’s nice.

I couldn’t help but smile at how cute he was when he got flustered. It was like he didn’t know how to handle a simple compliment, and the more he tried, the more tangled up he got.

Ray chuckled, patting him on the shoulder.

- We get it, dude, - Ray said, smirking. - Breathe.

Gerard let out a shaky sigh, his gaze flicking back to me, the corners of his mouth curling up in a shy smile.

- Anyway, I gotta get going now, - I said, moving toward the door. - But hey, let me know when you’re practicing next?

- Definitely! - Gerard said, looking so relieved, like he’d just passed a test. - I’ll, um… yeah, I’ll let you know.

As I turned to leave, I caught a glimpse of him still staring at me with that hopeful look. It was endearing, the way he looked both thrilled and completely overwhelmed at the idea of me showing up again.

After watching them practice the night before, I couldn't stop thinking about it. So when lunchtime came around, I found myself making my way over to where Gerard was sitting, alone as usual, tucked away near the back wall. He looked up as I approached, his eyes widening slightly, as if he couldn’t believe I’d actually come over again.

- Y-you… really want to sit here? With me? - He stammered, brushing his bangs out of his eyes.

- Of course! - I laughed, plopping down on the floor next to him. - My friends won’t stop talking about the last game… as if I wasn’t there!

- Yeah, I guess they’re pretty into that stuff - Gerard cracked a small smile, relaxing a bit as I settled in.

- Too much, if you ask me… - I chuckled - I’d rather talk about something more interesting… like last night. Seriously, you’re incredible! Your voice? Wow.

His cheeks turned pink, and he avoided eye contact with me, but I noticed the thin smile on his face.

- R-really? I mean, I was just, you know… messing around. It’s nothing special.

-Then I can’t imagine how good you’d be if you were actually trying! - I teased, nudging him lightly. He let out a small laugh, clearly embarrassed but pleased. Glancing down, I noticed the comic book he had open. - What are you reading?

He launched into a surprisingly passionate explanation about the storyline, his eyes lighting up as he talked. Our conversation continued, and with each sentence, I felt like he was slowly opening up, sharing little pieces of himself.

By the time the bell rang, I was surprised at how quickly the minutes had flown by. I stood to head to class, but before I could turn away, he took a deep breath, looking like he was gathering every ounce of courage he had.

- Hey, uh, would you… maybe want to come over? Like… after school? Just us, you know, as friends. We could, uh, watch a movie or something?

My heart skipped a beat, and I couldn’t hold back a grin.

- I’d like that. What movie are you thinking of?

- Whatever you like, - he replied quickly, looking relieved and a little flustered. - My mom has some romance ones lying around… or I’ve got horror if you’re into that?

- I’m not that into horror, but maybe we can watch two movies. You pick one, I’ll pick one…

- Perfect! - His blush deepened, but he nodded eagerly. - My place, after school. Just us.

As I went back to the class, I couldn't stop smiling at the thought of being at his house alone with him… At the start, my feelings about him weren't anything more than friendship, but the more time I spent with him, the more I liked him.

The afternoon was completely normal, but everything was drowned out by the idea that I would see him after school. When the last period finally ended, he was waiting for me at the classroom door, so that we could go to his house together. He was looking down, fiddling with the sleeve of his sweatshirt.

- A-are you still up for-

- Absolutely! - I answered, flashing him a smile. We headed out of the school together, walking toward his house side by side. As we walked, I felt my heart thumping with a mix of excitement and nerves.

In his basement, which was still the same, maybe a bit more messy, he picked up the movie he chose, but before putting it on the DVD, he glanced at me with an insecure look.

- A-are you sure that you want to watch this? 'Cause… you know… it’s alright if you don’t…

- Nope, this is fine, - I sat on his bed, crossing my legs. - Thanks for inviting me, Gee.

The name slipped out so naturally that I barely noticed at first. But Gerard did. His face flushed immediately, his gaze snapping to me. For a moment, he was speechless, trying to process what he’d just heard.

- Did you just..? Y-You…called me ‘Gee’? - He stammered. The corner of his mouth lifted into a shy smile, and he quickly turned his head, trying to hide his reaction. But he couldn’t stop himself from peeking back at me with an even wider grin.

- Oh! I…hope you don’t mind - I said softly, noticing how happy he looked.

- N-no, it’s… it’s actually… - He took a deep breath, his voice barely above a whisper. - I like it.

He sat down next to me and hit play on the remote control, then the movie started. During the movie we exchanged a few glances, and I could feel the atmosphere in the room getting cozier and cozier. In between movies, we chatted a bit about something, but unfortunately the evening ended more quickly than I would have liked.

As I got up to leave, Gerard hesitated for a moment, fidgeting with the edge of his sweater.

- Uh… I could walk you home, you know… since we’re, uh… neighbors and all, - He mumbled, barely meeting her eyes.

- I’d love that.- I smiled warmly, touched by his offer.

We stepped out into the cool evening, walking side by side down the quiet street. Neither of us spoke much, but the silence felt comfortable, filled with the soft sounds of our footsteps. When we finally reached my driveway, I turned to him, pausing for a moment before speaking.

- Thanks for tonight, Gee,

Before he could respond, I wrapped my arms around him in a quick, warm hug. For a second, he froze, his arms awkwardly hovering in the air. But he quickly hugged her back, his face burning as he tried to process what was happening.

- Y-you’re… welcome, - He managed, his voice barely a whisper. He couldn’t stop smiling, even though it looked like his face might actually be on fire.

- Goodnight, Gee. - I said softly, giving him one last smile before turning toward the door.

- Goodnight… -His voice was quieter now, but I could hear the smile in it as he called back. I waved one last time before stepping inside and closing the door behind me.

Damn, maybe I really liked him.

The next morning, I found myself practically floating through the school halls. The memory of last night. The movie, the hug, Gerard's shy smile… kept replaying in my mind. I wasn’t sure what exactly was happening between us, but something about it felt different… and exciting.

But of course, as soon as I walked into the cafeteria, my friends were waiting for me. They practically pounced on me as I sat down, their eyes wide with curiosity.

- Where were you last night? - One of them asked, a teasing grin on her face. - You disappeared after school and didn’t even say goodbye

- Oh, I was just… watching movies with Gee. - I said, trying to play it cool.

The table went silent for a second before they all broke into laughter. She raised an eyebrow, a wicked grin playing on her lips.

- “Gee”?? Really? You’re already calling him “Gee”? Are we going to start planning the wedding soon, or what?

- We’re just friends, okay? It’s not a big deal - I rolled my eyes, trying to hide my blush.

- Yeah sure - She teased.

This teasing lasted the entire meal, but all I could think about was how, despite all this, it was worth every second of the night before.

Those little moments with him, like movie night, kept happening. Moments when he would tell me about the lyrics he was writing, the characters he was creating for the comics and the movies he was watching; I could listen to him talk for hours, because the more he talked, the more excited he seemed.

Whenever I could, I'd go down to his basement to listen to his band rehearsals, and every now and then he'd show up at my practices too.

1st Person POV (Gerard)

Well, another rehearsal with the guys was starting and I was kind of waiting for the “audience”, but it wasn't long before I got a message “Heyy, Gee! I won't be able to make it to rehearsal today. They booked a practice at the last minute, sorry :(”. sighed, feeling that odd, deflated disappointment wash over me. It was strange… I’d never really “needed” someone to be here before.

- Hey, Gerard. Is your girlfriend coming? - Mikey’s voice cut through my thoughts, and his tone, so serious, made me squirm.

- No... - I mumbled, switching off my phone. - And she's not my girlfriend.

- Uhum… - Mikey said with a smirk.

I got up to fix the speaker, while the others tuned their instruments.

- So, Gerard, - Frank began, his voice way too casual, and I already knew what was coming - you and your cheerleader girlfriend going to the big football games this weekend?

My hands went up to my face, which I felt burning.

- Or maybe you’ll take her to one of those fancy parties - My brother is always helping, of course. - You know, all those exclusive high school events she probably gets invited to?

I groaned, trying to ignore them, but I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks. I didn’t know what to say.

- Oh, or maybe you’ll meet her parents soon - Deep inside I thought that Ray wouldn't keep this going. Well, I was wrong. - You know, ask them for permission to hold her hand!

This wasn’t funny. It felt like everything about me and her was getting dragged into some weird joke. The truth is, I wasn’t even sure what I was doing with her, but this wasn’t helping me figure it out.

While they were joking, it felt like they’d hit on something way too real. I wanted to be around her all the time. I wanted to be someone she could actually like. But hearing them mock it just made it feel… impossible.

- I’ve told you guys, We. Are. Not. Dating! - I said, trying to sound firm, but even to my ears, it sounded like I was trying to convince myself.

- Oh, sure, Gerard. We believe you. Totally. - Ray rolled his eyes. - But you want it, don’t you?

I froze. I could feel my heart racing as I tried to make sense of what he had just said. Did I want it? Was that what this was about? I mean, I liked being around her. I liked talking to her, calling her, texting her... But actually thinking about being with her in that way? The way Ray was implying? I couldn’t even picture it without feeling my stomach twist into knots.

- I- I don’t know, man, - I muttered, feeling more lost by the second. - Even if I did... It’s never gonna happen.

I looked down at my hands, trying to keep my voice steady, but it felt like I was talking to a crowd instead of just my bandmates.

- Do you think she would ever want to be seen with me? Like, really? - My voice cracked a little at the end, I felt like I was about to cry. But I couldn’t help it. I was confused. Terrified, even. - Do you think she’d want someone like me?

- Dude, we didn’t mean to-

- Can we change the subject, please? - I mumbled, blinking fast, feeling that awful sting in my eyes. I looked away, hoping they wouldn’t notice the tears building up.

The truth was, deep down, I thought I might like her. Really like her. But it felt like wanting something that was light-years out of reach. I don't belong in the world she's in, it's all so beautiful, all so fancy, all so tidy, all so put-together... and I'm so wrong, broken, weird... Why would she like me like that?

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I was scared that this was all a setup, like some cruel joke where she’d suddenly laugh and say, “Just kidding!”, as if she's about to drop a bucket of blood on my head, like in Carry.

But as much as it terrified me, I wanted to keep going, to take it as far as I could… maybe hoping, just a little, that she’d see something in me worth keeping around...

1st Person POV (reader)

After days of building up the courage, I finally managed to catch Gerard in the hallway. He was walking to his locker, absorbed in a comic book as usual, his dark hair falling perfectly over his eyes. My heart was racing, but I couldn’t back out now. Prom was coming up, and I didn’t want to go with anyone else.

- Hey, Gee! - I said, trying to sound casual, but my voice came out a little too high-pitched.

- Hey! What’s up? - He looked up, smiling when he saw me.

- Um, actually… I was wondering… - I think it was the first time I avoided eye contact with him, scratching the back of my neck. - Would you maybe, I don’t know… want to go to prom with me?

I spoke a little faster than usual, and Gerard’s eyes widened like I’d just spoken in another language. He stood there, staring at me, his mouth opening and closing as if he couldn’t quite believe what he’d heard.

- Wait-what?!

- Prom - I repeated, now feeling my own cheeks burning. - I know it’s not really your thing, but… I’d really love it if you went with me. We could go together, you know, as friends or… whatever you want it to be.

- You’re serious? - He asked, still staring at me in shock. - You… really want to go with me? Like… with me?

- Yeah, Gerard. - I nodded, giving him a small, nervous smile. - I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t want to. It wouldn’t be the same without you there.

- But… What about your friends? - He furrowed his eyebrows, with a concerned look on his eyes - Won’t they… won’t people think it’s weird? I mean, you’re… you know… you. And I’m…

I took a step closer to him, placing my hand on his shoulder, and giving him a thin grin.

- I don’t care what they think, Gerard. - He was looking in my eyes, I can't describe his expression… - I want to go with you. I’d be proud to be seen with you.

- You’re… serious? - His hazel eyes were glowing hopefully.

- Yes. - I nodded again, more certain than ever. - So, what do you say?

- I just… wow. - He panted and I shivered, afraid of him saying no - I really didn’t think you’d ever want… someone like me, at something like this.

- Well, I do. - my anxiety grew with every second he didn't answer - You mean a lot to me, Gee.

He finally smiled, shy and unsure but definitely a smile.

- Okay… okay, yeah. I’ll go with you.

- You will? - I grinned, feeling a surge of relief and excitement.

- Yeah,- he said, nodding as if he was trying to convince himself it was real. - I’d… I’d love to go with you.

I let out a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding, and the disbelief and wonder in his eyes made my heart swell. As I turned to head to my locker, I could feel his eyes on me, and I knew this prom would be something neither of us would ever forget.

1st Person POV (Gerard)

I couldn’t focus on anything else the whole day. My mind keeps replaying the sentence “Would you maybe, I don’t know… want to go to prom with me?” during all the classes. When it finally ended, I rushed to my house to meet the guys who were waiting for me to start our band practice. As soon as i steped int the room, i took a deep breath, and started:

- She… she asked me to prom, - I mumbled, scratching the back of my head, barely able to meet their eyes. - Like, she actually asked me.

The room went silent. Frank dropped his tuning fork, and Ray's eyebrows practically shot off his face.

- Holy shit! - Ray smiled - She really invited you?!

- Yeah, but… what if it’s a joke? - Suddenly, this thought came back to me, and I just couldn't hold it in. - I mean, what if she’s just playing some kind of cruel prank on me? Getting me to go so she can… I dunno… laugh at me with her friends or something?

- You’re being silly, dude… - MMikey said, shaking his head with a grin, trying to reassure me. - She really cares about you, I venture to say that she even likes you.

I shifted uncomfortably, glancing down at my worn-out sneakers.

- I just… I don’t know, man. I don’t want to look like an idiot showing up to prom, looking like… well, like me. - I gestured to my faded band shirt and old jeans. - She’s going to show up all… amazing, and I’ll just… I don’t even have clothes for something like that.

- Hey, don’t worry about your clothes. - Frank said, his hand on my shoulder - We’ll help you figure that part out. We can make a cool Gerard version of prom gear.

- I don’t know, guys… - I let out a doubtful sigh, but I couldn't help but feel a little better at their words. - I still feel like I’m walking into some kinda setup.

- Or… maybe it’s not. Maybe she actually likes you and wants to go with you. - Mikey shook his head.

- I guess… I mean, she did seem pretty genuine. But, man, I can’t mess this up.

When I stopped for a while to process everything, and realized that I was so nervous about the idea of her embarrassing me, I didn't realize that I could embarrass her if I did something wrong.

- We’re going to help you get ready for this prom, no question. - Frank keep encouraging me - This is your shot, and you’re gonna look so good, everyone’s gonna wonder why she got so lucky.

I couldn’t help but crack a shy smile, a tiny spark of hope flickering in my chest at his words. I appreciated how they were all backing me up. Still, the nerves didn’t fade. In fact, now I had to find something to wear... and I had no idea where to start.

But maybe, just maybe, this wouldn’t be a total disaster. Maybe, I thought as I looked at the guys with a nervous but hopeful grin, this might actually turn out to be the best night of my life.

1st Person POV (reader)

The night had finally arrived. My heart was thumping in my chest, and I could feel the butterflies fluttering wildly in my stomach. The dress I had picked out earlier in the week felt a little too tight now, my nerves making everything feel more intense than usual. I couldn't help but glance at the clock, watching the minutes tick by as I waited for Gerard to arrive.

What was I thinking? Was I making a huge mistake? Would he feel out of place at prom? I shook my head, trying to silence my anxious thoughts. I had asked him because I wanted him there. I didn’t care about what everyone else would think, and if he felt out of place, well, I hoped my presence would help him feel comfortable.

Then, finally, the doorbell rang. My heart skipped a beat, and I rushed to open the door, only to freeze for a moment when I saw him standing there.

Gerard looked... different. He was wearing a simple black suit, not too formal but definitely better than what I had imagined. His hair was styled neatly, but it still had that messy, Gerard charm. He looked slightly nervous, his hands shoved in his pockets, but his eyes lit up when he saw me. The nervous smile he gave me made my heart melt a little.

- Hey,- He said softly, shifting awkwardly on his feet.

- Hey, - I replied, suddenly feeling shy too. - You look… you look great.

- I do? - His eyes widened in surprise.

- Yeah, you’re handsome - I nodded, fighting the blush creeping up my neck.

- Thanks... You look… wow. Really beautiful - He scratched the back of his neck, looking down at his shoes as if he was embarrassed by the compliment.

- Are you ready to go?

- Sure!

The ride to prom felt like a blur. We didn't talk much—both of us were too nervous, I think. When we finally arrived, my friends were already waiting near the entrance, their eyes scanning the crowd as they laughed and joked. As soon as they saw me with Gerard, they froze, their expressions shifting in surprise.

- Oh my God, look who finally decided to show up! - one of them teased. - I knew it! You like him, don’t you?

- You’ve been denying it this whole time, but now it’s so obvious - My face immediately turned bright red. I opened my mouth to protest, but she wasn’t finished.

- You’ve been denying it this whole time, but now it’s so obvious. - All of them kinda laughed.

Gerard was standing a little behind me, looking equally embarrassed, his face flushed. I could feel his discomfort radiating off him, and I could tell that these comments were making him more self-conscious. He shifted on his feet, nervously running a hand through his hair.

I held his hand so we could walk inside. But my moves were interrupted by my friends.

- You guys look cute together, though. Admit it, you like him! - another one of them chimed in, her voice teasing, but with a hint of sincerity.

Once inside, we quickly found our seats at a table. The music was blasting, the lights dimmed, and the air was filled with the sound of chatter, laughter, and the occasional loud cheer from some of the other students. I could feel Gerard stiffening beside me, but I just kept my hand on his, hoping to offer some kind of reassurance. He looked around nervously, his wide eyes scanning the room as though he didn’t belong.

- Are you okay - I asked, in an attempt to comfort him. 

- I don’t know…-  he mumbled, his voice barely audible over the music. - I mean, I’m glad I’m here with you, but this is… definitely not my scene. You’re the only one who could ever get me to come to a place like this.

I laughed, feeling my heart flutter. I didn’t think he realized just how much that meant to me. The night was already feeling more perfect than I could have ever imagined.

Then, as the slow songs started, the room filled with couples swaying gently to the music. Gerard and I stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do. Finally, he broke the silence.

- I’ve never really done this before… - he said quietly.

- Me neither. - I smiled at him. 

And just like that, the awkwardness faded. He pulled me closer, and we started swaying together. He was still a little nervous, but he held me close, and I could feel his warmth, his pulse beating along with mine.

As the song came to a close, Gerard looked down at me, his face flushed. He cleared his throat, trying to hold back his nervousness.

- Thanks for making this the best night ever, - Gerard whispered, his forehead resting against mine.

This… - He hesitated for a second, then smiled shyly - seems like the first time I watched Corpse Bride for the first time… Awesome.

I giggled, then, without saying a word, Gerard leaned down and kissed me. It was soft, gentle, messy, romantic… everything I had imagined and more. He pulled away slowly, his eyes wide with surprise, as if he couldn’t believe he had just done that.

We stood there, not caring about the world around us. It was just the two of us, caught in the moment, and in that instant, everything felt right.

- You're welcome - I whispered back.

Smiling, I move to his lips again. His warm lips felt just right, now his hand came up to my cheek, as I wrapped my arms around his neck. This kiss was more confident, like something we both were sure that we wanted. I swear, I've never thought I would end up with Gerard like this… but there is no other place that I would rather be.

___________________________________________

~ So, that's it! Let me know if u like it! (i'm not sure if i liked this one...)

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️

As an American, I need this. Please.

Skipping the queue to do this for you, because yeah. That's a solid af reason.

1k for TWATYTK:

---

If there’s one thing he knows, it’s that. Knowing what that’s like has informed so many of his parenting choices over the years. Eddie looks at his husband. He gets the religious, cultural side of it in a way Buck doesn’t. But Buck isn’t a stranger to a different genre of growing up without the necessary affection, either. More so than Eddie, maybe. 

Buck has a strange, contemplative look on his face. 

“And, uh, the open adoption part,” he says to Lourdes. “That’s so you know for sure?”

Eddie raises an eyebrow, not quite following. But the way Lourdes’ face sinks, she does. She understands what Buck is saying. 

“Yeah,” Lourdes nods. “I can’t keep her. I know I can’t. But what kind of person would I be if I just… Didn’t make sure she was okay with people who love her properly?”

Eddie gets that, too. It’s the same thought process that led him to changing his will all those years ago. To changing what would have been the natural, assumed process of things in the case of his death. Chris would have been fine if Eddie died and he went to live with his parents. His physical needs would have been met. They wouldn’t have even been hard on him in the same ways they were hard on Eddie, for a number of reasons from different circumstances to ableism. But would they have loved him properly? Fought for him right? No. Eddie knows that wholeheartedly. No. 

Lourdes may not want or be able to parent this child. But she’s got that bone deep instinct that Eddie recognizes. The one where you’re desperate to make sure your child has it better and easier than you did. 

“She’s lucky,” Eddie says suddenly. Because maybe no one has told this girl that. Maybe she’s only been told that she’s fucked up. “The baby. She’s lucky.”

Lourdes blinks. Her face kind of goes blank.

“Not every kid has someone advocating for them like that,” Eddie explains. 

When Lourdes speaks again, her voice is a little shaky.

“Thank you.”

☆☆☆

They leave Pepa’s maybe an hour later. When Pepa and Maria arrived back from their walk, they did of course make Eddie and Buck tell Lourdes all about Chris. Even though Eddie is certain she’s already heard. It’s a bizarre matchmaking process that leaves Eddie with a poor taste in his mouth. Regardless, he’s glad they met Lourdes. Glad they talked to her. Even if he can be one person to make her feel like she’s not a screw up, whatever. He’ll take it. It was worth the rest of the discomfort. 

Buck is quiet as they leave. He’s got a very intense but distant look in his eyes. He’s thinking so hard Eddie worries steam is going to start coming out of his ears. Eddie feels guilty. He didn’t want to do this. He didn’t want to be here. 

They don’t even make it down Pepa’s street before Buck pulls the vehicle over, puts it into park, and looks at Eddie. 

“What’s wrong?” Eddie asks. 

“I change my mind,” Buck says. 

“What?” 

“I change my mind. We should adopt her baby.”

Eddie can’t be hearing this correctly.

“Buck,” he sighs. “Come on. You don’t have to do this because you feel bad or pressured.”

Buck shakes his head. “That’s not what this is. I really want to do it.”

“Okay, well,” Eddie huffs, a little exasperated. “You were adamantly against this a few days ago, remember? So I’m sort of confused here.”

“I can’t have a change of heart?” He asks.

“Not without me worrying that you feel backed into a corner or-or guilty…”

“I don’t!” Buck practically snaps. “I’m just fucking terrified, okay?”

Eddie feels a bit stunned. That’s not what he expected to hear. In this whole lengthy discussion, spanning over a year, about becoming parents again, Buck has never expressed fear. That’s sort of Eddie’s thing. Buck has always been the one who plows full steam ahead. Confident. Optimistic. Easy-going. But, Eddie supposes, they’ve never been this close before.

“Okay,” Eddie says gently. “Explain that to me.”

Buck takes a deep breath. “I… I liked that we had everything under control before, right?”

“Right,” Eddie nods. 

“But I… I do like the idea of helping her. Of having a little girl in October? That’s, like, so soon. That’s amazing.”

Eddie smiles a little. “Yeah, that would be pretty cool.”

Well… October 19th is less than four months away. So that’s… Scary as shit, actually? But Eddie could handle that. Of course that’s the part Buck is excited about. But, overall, yes. A little girl, sooner than they expected, does sound pretty wonderful. Even if Eddie had been super sure their next kid would be a boy. That hardly matters. 

“But, Eddie… We would have no control,” Buck says. “She could… She could change her mind. She… She could change her mind before. She could change her mind at the birth. In California, she has thirty days to take her back.” 

“Oh,” Eddie exhales, understanding. 

“I couldn’t… I couldn’t handle that, Eddie. How could I handle that? It was hard enough handing over the baby when I knew he wasn’t mine to keep, I…” Buck gulps for breath. “I don’t know if I could do it.”

“Okay,” Eddie nods. “Okay, I understand. And yeah, that would… That would be awful. It would.”

Buck breathes, clearly trying to bring himself back down.

“For what it’s worth,” Eddie says. “I don’t think she’d do that.”

“We don’t really know her,” Buck says. “I like her. She seems great. But we don’t know her.”

“No,” Eddie agrees. “We don’t. I just… I got a sense she’s really serious about setting that baby up to have a happier life than she’s had. Which is why she’d prefer two public servants to the wealthy church family.” 

“Right,” Buck mumbles. “Yeah, she did… She did seem that way.”

“But…” Eddie sighs. “I don’t think that’s the main factor here.”

[anarchywoofwoof]

Your whole page has been filled with excuses and reasons why you believe you were right not to vote/ vote for 3rd party.

What do you do in your spare time to revolt against the oppressive system outside of Tumblr?

If not voting, then what are you actively doing?

first of all, i live in missouri. i don't need to make "excuses". i voted in everything but the presidential election and Kamala lost Missouri by over half a million votes. as i expected. so i'm not exactly who i'm supposed to be making excuses for?

furthermore, i also told every single person following me for the last year that they should vote for Kamala if they felt that was the right thing to do. i never once told anyone to vote third party or not to vote. so again, i have no reason to make excuses for myself or anyone else.

second of all, this question is phrased in a way that suggests that someone railing against capitalism online is somehow incompatible with taking actions in your actual, real life to try and improve things. i don't think they're synonymous, but i'm open to being proven wrong.

that being said, i really don't owe anyone a list of my "revolutionary actions" in exchange for my right to say whatever i want on my own blog. however, to help other people who might be reading me responding to your (maybe a tiny bit condescending) question and because i keep being asked this question, here are some things that i do in my own city to try and build community:

i spend 6-9 hours a month at the St. Louis Area Foodbank doing miscellaneous volunteer stuff, mainly packing and sorting

last winter, i made 24 boxes of meals with rice, protein and veggies and handed them out on my block

my local city council meets on the 2nd and 4th Monday of every month - i try to make it to at least one if not both meetings to understand what's happening and what they're focusing on

i try to maintain and keep the Little Free Libraries and Little Free Pantrys in my area stocked with educational and inclusive materials. i've reblogged a post about this before.

i am no longer a dues paying DSA member but i try to attend at least 2 meetings or community actions a month

i canvassed for Cori Bush in August for her primary but unfortunately she lost

i helped for a week on the ground during the spring to solicit signatures for Amendment 3 to get it on the ballot and i did a few hours of phone banking for Planned Parenthood to try and spread the word on Amendment 3 a few weeks ago (it passed)

i had to stop in the last 3 months because i got laid off in July and no longer have a lot of disposable income, but i've donated hundreds of dollars to various local charities, GoFundMes, mutual aid requests, etc.

this was 4 years ago and as a general rule, i do not take pictures at direct actions. however, this was taken by someone from a newspaper and my face isn't showing, so whatever. if there is a direct action to attend, i am generally there - especially if it is related to police brutality, racism, LGBTQIIA+ activism or Palestine. i have been to several.

i don't know if you need more examples or if this is sufficient, but i can probably come up with a few other things that i'm passively involved in or haven't had the time to do in a while if you really need more. i hope this was helpful.