#max you little shit i love you
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starry-bi-sky · 13 days ago
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mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.
now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.
He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.
(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)
The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.
The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.
And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.
(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)
The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.
anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)
#mxtx svsss#svsss au#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#luo binghe#disciple shen yuan#scum villain#svsss#*points at SQQ/SY* i want him to go nuts. as a treat. let him crumble just a little over the stress of his fate and the stress of survival#and the stress of having a lack of autonomy over a handful of his decisions. starry craves angst and she craves a very specific SQQ angst#he was a number 1 hater back in the day and lbr being a hater takes energyyyy. ive heard that this man was the BIGGEST hater i wanna#see him rip a man to shreds with nothing but his tongue and a voice that could cut marble clean in half. skin a man alive sqq you deserve i#*mortal kombat voice* FINISH HIM#i love without-a-cure but unfortunately i dont think SQQ would be able to have WAC and also survive in the abyss.#the succubi nest that adopted him tried seducing him at first. it didn't work. but he did somehow charm them with his cringefail ways#so now they have a brand new mortal big/little brother to dote on. SQQ is frankly delighted to learn all about succubi culture that doesnt#revolve around sex. he makes quite a few friends/allies in the abyss because of his pure fascination and unbiased desire to learn about#demonic culture and all the different niches and nuances of it across species. he's still going insane tho. like that's not stopping.#there's a single LBH pov chapter in the fic and its frankly so unhinged it was fantastic. he's so possessive. he straight up goes:#'oh SQQ isnt gonna be the next peak lord. he's ascending to heaven with me when i do :)' when Sha Hualing (also peak lord) told him that he#couldn't keep his disciple in the bamboo house all the time. what was SQQ gonna do when LBH ascends and he becomes the new peak lord?#gosh that first chapter is rotating around in my mind so bad. LBH was SO unwell. like losing his actual shit over SQQ near the edge.#i so want to write a oneshot abt this where SQQ is also in hysterics (albeit over slightly diff reasons) and tells LBH on his knees:#'this disciple deeply apologizes to his shizun. for he will not be ascending to the heavens with him.' right before he falls into the abyss#this au being disciple SY is for shits and giggles but i can also see it happening for regular SQQ bc 'fuck it im a dead man either way'#frothing at the mouth at this idea also being a SY-is-SJ au too. for the extra angst of SQQ trying to bear the weight of multiple lives on#his shoulders and trying to figure out what is real and what isn't and if he's meant to suffer in all of his lives no matter what he does.#not once in his life has he ever been free to do what he likes has he? self-hatred to the max. he's going mad. poor boy :]
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23fallencomets · 3 months ago
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*the gang going to drop oscar off at logans*
logan: *seeing oscar for the first time in two weeks since the break up and accidentally slamming the door in his face in panic*
max: *hanging out of the van window* LMAO WHAT A LOSER
max being a little shit in the one paragraph of chapter four of I love you, I’m sorry
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sparring-spirals · 2 years ago
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uhoh empire sib meta time.
Courtesy of that last rb by @iinfernal thinking very hard (very affectionately) about love in the form of, we are going to work to keep each other on track. Especially with Caleb and Beau. Because like. its not just about newfound acceptance, people who will give you the benefit of the doubt and help you improve, people who see your worst and love you anyway, people who will forgive you.
Like its about that! But its also about- i trust you to drag me back if i stray. i trust you to call me out, to push back. i am putting my back to you- you will protect it, and you will also pull me back if i wander.
The first big backstory reveal between Beau and Caleb was an exchange, not a kindness. it was, tell me why you are afraid of fire, and ill get you into the library. Caleb laid out some of the corners of his guilty conscience, to Nott, with all of her faith in him, (he is my boy), to Beau, with her skepticism and brusque curiosity, and it was not meant as a soft gesture. It was not a call for forgiveness, or absolution- it was an item for barter, a warning, an admission of guilt.
and Beau- still unsure, still rough around the edges and rude and defensive and angry, shell-shocked and out of her depth did not provide forgiveness, or kindness. She said something along the lines of- good god, you know thats fucked up, right? i didnt ask for this, what the fuck.
She said something like: you know what you need to do now, then, right? prevent this guy from hurting more people. This is what you've gotta do now, I think- this is what we'll do-
And Caleb gets into the library, and casts haste on Beau in a bar fight, and there is something to be said about love shaped like a willingness to disagree, to push back, to say things wrong but try to say it anyway.
Caleb, and Beau, arguing. Beau is suspicious and Caleb is ready to run, and "the problem with friends is you have to care about them". Running into old injuries and boundaries, working to learn them, to fight to communicate. Apologies that are awkward but sincere. Kindness that is misshappen but intentional.
Caleb and Beau, butting heads, poking fun, trusting the other person to be suspicious of them, when it really counts.
"Can we keep each other straight?"
Some fifty episodes apart: have faith in us, just a little bit? dont run.
follow your own advice. don't go.
Caleb, vision and hearing gone and flung out ahead, placing a hand on Beau's shoulder. Lead me well, lead me straight, bring me back if I stray. Caleb and Beau, going in circles about what to do as the world ends, ambition and magic and time and guilt, and entities at war. Worried about evil, about going wrong, needing the clear vision of someone who loves you and will not eternally forgive you.
"I'm worried I am exactly what he said I was."
"Not yet."
God just. Love as keeping each other on track. Beau and Caleb, as the only ones to get the eyes, afflicted by searching too hard for knowledge. what a horror, to have you and your tether tossed into an unknown spiral. what a comfort- if it was any of them, at least it was both. The Mighty Nein, making contingency plans, Yasha sticking close to caleb and cooing over his animal forms and ready, ready, for the worst. What a nightmare. Thank god. "Im glad it was us."
"You drove me insane."
"I hated you. You sucked."
What love. What immense care. Years on in, and it all still comes back to:
"You got my back?"
"What's the play, Beauregard?"
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daigah · 1 year ago
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not normal rn I'm thinking about Ted too hard... GRRAAHHHHHH
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forgotten-daydreamer · 5 months ago
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Took twice the max dose of melatonin before the final revision for tomorrow’s exam, I’m shitting my pants and I genuinely don’t know anything as thoroughly as I should but if I sleep less than 4 hrs before it I just know I’m gonna do even worse somehow
#don’t take twice the max dose of anything btw#genuinely don’t do the shit that I do#i only did it bc I know my limits and haven’t had any other substances in over 24 hrs but don’t ever try it#always talk to your gp before taking any meds and supplements at all#anyway psa aside#I want to revise for two hrs so until 1.30am circa but I genuinely hope I pass out sometime in the next hours and a half#godspeed ig#uni#melatonin#I have super high expectations but I genuinely prepared this exam in like 4 days and my brain has been all over the place#haven’t had the chance (economic too so please please consider sparing a couple of bucks for my ko-fi?) to meet my therapist in 2 weeks#been super suicidal super busy dealing with stuff and people and my family and uni and ah oh how I wish I had a brain able to focus#also the ‘visions of horror’ as I call them have lowkey turned into auditory hallucinations that never stop and it’s… tough#genuinely so tired of everything in general#I’d promised to hang with my uni friends after the exam bc I should be done my midday tops but I know im gonna be super sad and underwhelme#so I hope I can be at home by 4 pm tops with one excuse or the other#I love them all so much but I need a break. also bc I got another exam in less than a fucking week and I still haven’t started studying for#it because it’s objectively easier than tomorrow’s and because when was I supposed to study for it#I spent 3 good days working on a paper that isn’t even mine for a subject I don’t even take#a favor for a friend which turned into 3 more friends asking me if I could help them with theirs#and you know me#I never say no. unfortunately. but also I’m super glad they want my help bc they know I can write at least (one good thing)#but. that’s still -3 days available#then. the demons#wasted so many hours just pacing and biting my nails raw and being pathetic#so yeah. in a little under 15 hrs I want to be in bed again. resting until the 19th when the cycle will begin anew#also math ain’t mathing. my exam is in 12 hrs only now 13.
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daddy-ul · 5 months ago
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tour blurb
I can't say anything BC it's the same (almost) unit of measurement that I apply when I go to concerts.
Smsmksksa (not so much) joking aside, the mic unit of measurement is the most useful and obvious for the concert donut. I know they updated the number and positions of the mics,, so I am now kind of curious of the ratio drum riser/mics on the stage. Like there are 4 battle station on the donut, how many mics between every drum kit? This is a math problem due to monday
*coff* that said did they discussed it in tuning rooms etc bc lars asked James to stay in his line of site for the most of it?
But like, of course for stages like the one in Milan, it wasn't like that, even if it was smaller
#my sister at my first tallica concert: okay. we're do you wanna go? i swear i will get you there#me instantly: in front of the drums#and that has been my concert MO ever since sksksksksksks#and yeah. i am what i am of course i wanna see lars first and back then he was mostly in a static position#BUT!!!!!#i fucking know this band dynamics. like. in milan last month i was on the left side of the stage and i was great!!!#I'll start the concert with lars and rob!#and that's exactly what happened#to say. my dear duders. if you see the drummer? you're FOR SURE gonna see the rest of them one way or another#bc that's the eye of the cyclone babey! they will always end up... there (quote). they will inevitably circle back there#AND. ALSO. as you all know im a big fan of when they all four play close close together and all the little interactions the positions etc#if you cant see the drum riser... well you'll only get max 3. so.#but yeah snsksksksk i have a fucking lars blog since 2020. no shit i want to see him#*coff* that said#*coff* that said did they discussed it in tuning rooms etc bc lars asked James to stay in his line of site for the most of it?#or was it just spontaneous?#ask#the-mighty-het-speaks#ah. soph! say ty to your friend i love these reports from the front!!#jh and lu#jinn out#if this post doesnt have an ounce of sense or purpose or thesis or whatever... yeah probably snsnsjs i am tired so my thoughts are jumbled#.... is that the right word? well you get it *move hands*#thank you soph for sharing bc this is EXACTLY my kind of thing *grabby hands*
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gaylittleguys · 5 months ago
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it’s actually so fucked up and evil that random white npcs from bg3 that show up twice got more dedicated fans than Wyll
#racist fans will do anything to avoid actually engaging with a black character#like. no offense to normal people who like some of the fun npcs#there’s a lot of them! I love all the detail put into the npcs!#but.#HUGE but#it’s weird right that there was more fandom about background guys than one of the major characters#and then people would go ‘ohhh but wyll doesn’t rly have any content :/‘#like guy who’s there for like 3 scenes max could possibly ever have more depth than A MAJOR CHARACTER#I’m not even excusing it as oohhhh but people want hot tiefling characters bc WYLL#I will defend Wyll to the death#if there’s no Wyll defenders I have died#if Wyll has a million fans I’m one of them. if Wyll has 5 fans I’m one of them. if Wyll has 1 fan that 1 is me.#like yeahhhhg Larian did him dirty with his storyline and fucked up that he was hours less content than other origin characters#I’m not excusing that that’s awful too#but like. idk if you say Wyll is boring while hyping up white npc no.324 I’ll kill you#he’s funnyyyy and cool and kind and I like him#.doc#what everrrrr#I’m hoping the bg3 has calmed down a little I don’t wish to be crucified for this but it shouldn’t be a controversial opinion#boring bg3 fans would throw up if they’d see the shit I think about these characters#Larian let me have a go I’ve got good ideas for his story#sucks that Wylls arc revolves so much around other people#I still think it would have been soo interesting to explore his ideals/alignment leading him astray like his misconceptions about karlach#like a whole if he belives what he’s doing is for good but it’s not where does that leave him how would he feel about that#whateverrrrrr#wyll my best friend wyll#my beloved
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hirokiyuu · 2 years ago
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wow so when i wrote this i was like "hey this i'm only posting bc it's the first part to something much funnier" and then completely forgot to post the followup. so here have some dys>sol(>cal/tammy) bracelet scene pre-pre-pre-rship stuff. i love when kids are dumb and in love
it's ok (we'll find our way); 1k
When Sol crests the hill to where Dys is packing for his next trip out, the very first thing that Dys looks at are his wrists, because Dys is an idiot. Because apparently Sol is also an idiot, he is in fact wearing the databand, spinning it with his other hand as he stares down at it. “Hi, Dys.”
Thank fuck half the time he just nods hello at Solana anyways, because trying to unstick his jaw from where it’s glued shut sounds pretty impossible right now. Not that Sol even notices, really, still staring down at his dumb new bracelet. “Um. Can I… can I get another ten minutes where you don’t tell me you think something’s stupid?”
Thank fuck that him packing means he has an excuse to turn around. Against all odds his dumb voice doesn’t crack as he says, “Sure?”
“Someone likes me?” Sol blurts, instantly, and when he glances over, Sol is blushing. Stars. Dys kind of wants to die. “Like, I got this message on Vertumnalia, and apparently, um, this --” he holds up his wrist, like Dys hasn’t been staring at it since the moment he showed up “-- is from a, a secret admirer?”
Yeah, I fucking know. He bites it back. “Oh.”
“Someone likes me,” Sol repeats; he’s staring down at the dumb thing with stars in his eyes. “No one’s ever liked me before. Like, I mean, I thought, um. I thought Cal did, and I was…. I was totally wrong there, y’know?”
Because Cal is the stupidest person in the colony, yeah. Why anyone would ever pick Tammy with Sol as an option, Dys will never understand. “But…” says Sol, and the smile that had faltered on his face for a moment is back, small and sweet. “But I guess someone does.”
Okay. Maybe the whole thing wasn’t such a terrible idea after all, if it makes Sol smile like that. Or at least, that’s what Dys thinks for exactly two seconds, before suddenly Sol looks up at him and blurts, “Who do you think gave it to me?”
Nevermind, Dys wants to die again; he jerks back around, grabbing the nearest ration to shove into his pack so Sol won’t see him blush or whatever. Luckily Sol doesn’t actually seem to be expecting an answer, already barreling on ahead: “Like, I was thinking about it, and I really don’t know? Like, at first I thought maybe it was one of the Helio kids, but I don’t really know any of them that well, and whoever made this, um… I mean, it has a bunch of stuff I’m into, y’know? All the music and vids and stuff that I like?”
Next time Sol starts talking about Sanctuary Moon, Dys is turning on his holospeak and pretending he’s gone deaf. “So that kinda narrowed it down, I guess, to one of us? But like, obviously it’s not Cal--” because he’s an idiot, as previously established, and fuck but Dys hates the way Sol’s face drops a little just saying that “--and Nemmie’s super gone on that Vace guy already, so I knew it wasn’t her, and that just leaves --”
--oh fuck here it comes--
“--Marz?”
Dys stops. Puts his things down. Turns around. “...What?”
“I know!” Sol’s got his face buried in his hands, which is good, because Dys has absolutely no idea what kind of expression he’s making himself right now.  “I know, I don’t like it either, like….” He drags them down his face before looking up at Dys; for a moment seeing Dys’s face he wilts, but then rallies again. “I-I mean, it’s a nice gift! It’s a really, really nice gift, y’know? It made me… it made me really happy, okay?”
Stars. Of course it did. There’s a weird lump in Dys’s throat when he hears that, but Sol, still charging stupidly ahead, doesn’t even notice. “But even if I liked girls, I wouldn’t like Marz, she’s way too mean and bossy and I just….” Sol sighs again, slumping over, and despite his words he’s still playing with the bracelet. “I didn’t even think she noticed me that much.”
“She doesn’t.”
Sol blinks, looks back up. “What?”
Fuck. It’s too late to take the words back. Dys takes a single breath, wipes his palms against his legs, and then manages, “It wasn’t from Marz.”
“Oh,” says Sol. He’s got that same puzzled frown he always gets when they’re up on the walls and he’s struggling through his homework. “Wait, really? But how do you know… that….”
The silence is deafening, as the frown gives way to slowly widening eyes. Dys, for his part, turns around and starts shoving all his stuff into his bag as fast as he can, who gives a shit about organizing right now? “Dys,” says Sol, a little unsteadily, and even without looking Dys can picture the way his whole awful handsome face has gone slack in surprise. “Are you my --”
“So what if I am?” he interrupts immediately, because if Sol actually says the words he’s going to die. His face is on fire. “Don’t make a big deal about it.”
“Oh,” says Sol, still sounding totally bewildered. Dys should’ve chucked the stupid databand off the ridges when he’d finished making it; he starts buckling up the pack and ignores the fact that the top won’t go totally shut. When he glances back, just for a second, Sol’s gone red too, still staring at him, and in return Dys flushes even more and looks back away. “I-I won’t.”
“Good,” says Dys, reaching his limit. Before this stupid conversation can drag on any longer he grabs his pack and hustles away, not quite sprinting only because he can’t actually run with the stupid thing on. As he goes, though, he glances over his shoulder once last time.
Sol’s still standing right where Dys left him, head tilted back down to the bracelet, touching it gently the way he had been when he’d first walked up. On his face Dys can just barely make out that same small, shy smile as before. Dys nearly trips; Sol looks up; their eyes meet and for a moment that smile grows just a little before Dys whips his head back forward, his own dumb heart pounding so loud it’s all he can hear. 
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oc-cinematic-universe · 7 months ago
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i LOOOVE thinking about fantasy disabilities!!!! i love figuring out what people would have to do to accommodate them! it's literally awesome!
#fun after-comic joe facts time yayyy so joe's soul got a little bit fucked up#its just this small crack. which makes him entirely unresponsive to anything for like 5 minutes max#at seemingly random intervals. it slows down and doesnt last as long as it heals but its still like#not good lol#and its just gonna keep happening the rest of his life because souls fuckin heal weird#its one of many problems disorders he has to deal with this ones just special because doctors have#NO clue what to do with him so he and his friends just gotta figure out how to cope with it themselves#after a while he can kinda tell when its about to happen a few seconds before it does#so because he's rarely left alone anyways because he. cant take care of himself much anymore#he can give them a warning and they will make sure nothing dangerous will come from it and just wait for him to come to#as it heals and becomes less of a problem it kinda becomes more of a problem ironically#he does reach a point where he can mostly handle himself. but he cant do shit when that happens#except try to sit down asap. so while it happens less often it causes More Incidents. alas#i think kiara's way of dealing with it happening in particular is so silly#cause she just. grew up with him like this. this is just normal to her she's never questioned it#like oh ok dad's blanked out again i will just wait so patiently for it to be done so i can keep showing him#my mlp toys and explaining mlp lore to him#it happens and she just stops what she's doing and waits for him then continues as if nothing happened#everyone else gets so fussy about him when it happens but kiaras just#are you done? ok so pinkie pie is the laughter pony#he thinks its awesome he loves her so much
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savage-rhi · 9 months ago
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✨️Magenta🔥
#looking at the mental health and therapy positions open in my area#therapists are leaving left and right that a clinic i used to work at that treated me like utter shit is almost offering 140k in salary#to keep folks retained#i remember just a few years ago the max a therapist made there was 75k#seeing other places too where its like 67 to 85 an hr with sign on bonuses upward to 5k#its not a good sign professionals are leaving in droves#but damn it do i wish i had my license already so i could hop on and not live in poverty for a hot minute#im not fooling myself based on how inflation and the economy is running if you make over 100k its gonna be like making less than 45k#cause we getting gutted#but still god damn it#i got 2 and a half more years to go#fuck if i made that much right now i could get out of debt and spend a good chunk on people that need it#cause i don't need much else to keep my ass happy#this is the little flag that gives me hope#I'll be able to make a living doing something i love and helping people and getting my damn fucking bread#if i could make a living full time writing tho that would be fucking amazing#same thing with my voice over stuff too#god theres so much i aspire to do i got the ambition for it alright#but i got the disability that makes me take ten steps back and i live in a capitalistic hellscape that wants me tired and exhausted to where#i can't accomplish anything else but keeping the machine going#i feel like my writing sucks lately thats probably just burnout but god damn#this got bleak#k magenta can go fuck itself lets reword this jay#you're gonna get your license you're gonna have SOME FUCKING STABILITY you're gonna help people you're gonna be content and#you're gonna get your mother fucking bread that you've been promised#magenta mother fuckers magenta
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bibiana112 · 1 year ago
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Question inspired by today's nyancave p3p stream, do you actually need a license to voice act in Brazil? Thought you might know because you live there
Well, not really a specific license for voice acting, you just need to be a registered actor the same way people need to be to perform in theater, television, movies and stuff
What you do absolutely need is a ton of nepotism though
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sumi-sprite · 7 months ago
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Awaken and lift the veil, father, it is time for SPOONING
Every morning at 5 AM 
(Source)
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abigailspinach · 2 months ago
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“Stone was watching him again, his gaze opaque, and not just because of his bad eye. Moon wondered if his own thoughts had shown on his face.
But Stone just asked, “What was her name, the warrior who said she was your mother?” Moon hesitated. He didn’t see a reason not to tell. “Sorrow.”
Stone sighed in that particular tone Moon was beginning to recognize. “What?” Moon demanded. “Nothing,” Stone told him with a shrug. “I just wouldn’t give one of my kids a name like that. It’s asking for trouble.”
You really have kids.” He was a little surprised. Stone had made that crack about great-grandchildren earlier, but Moon had thought he was making it up.
“Quite a few, over the turns.” Stone fixed his gaze on the sky, narrowing his eyes. “I’m bringing my great-great-granddaughter a present.” He must mean the gold bracelet in his pack.”
— The Cloud Roads: Volume One of the Books of the Raksura by Martha Wel
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astrxealis · 5 months ago
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i am so used to my pinned post i kinda don't want to change the format but i want to
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#Like. i want it to be more ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 u get me?#it's too small/limiting for me rn ragggghhh ..... will change it soon ^_^ 💖#wow. hard to believe it's already june. 4-5ish months till i'm not a minor anymore and around 2 months till college#happy pride btw :3 Hm. i am still not out to my parents but i am vv comfortable now w who i am.#i know for sure i prefer short hair over long hair and hate when it gets past this certain length that i then need a haircut#and i've actually grown comfortable wearing dresses and skirts! which ngl has been there a bit since i watched hamilton#but only now ?? like. Yeah.#it's funny bcs when i had shorter hair than my short hair rn LMFAO it was shorter than i actually liked#but the perks were my friends telling me You Look Like A Guy Even More and some storeclerk calling me sir#but that was funny bcs i was w my twin. and ok we're identical but maybe not obvious at first bcs i wear glasses and they have slightly more#femme and long hair and her style is diff from mine. colorful or bright or maximalist vs minimalist or dark or max 3 tones same colorsalways#LMFAO. me & my twin r super comfy w each other so sometimes we make Jokes. uh. yeah. HELP?#if u get it than yaaaa B) o/ anyway yeah. also comfortable w small amts of makeup now!#if it looks natural enough i'm cool w it :3 i also like stylistic shit. but haven't tried that stuff yet <3#i just hate makeup in general when it is too much that you don't look like yourself anymore... unless it's Cool#IDK HWO TO EXPLAIN. whatever it's not important. <3#ouuughhh i love my new pompompurin stuffed toy... official from sanrio in japan hehehehehehhe#i like making it do stupid shit like eating my soup or mochi and i like using it to tell my mom stuff like#pompompurin thinks you suck (jokingly. i love my mom she knows how i am!)#so she says back pompomsometbinv tell your amo (owner?) she sucks more LMFAOOO#also. just. fhsbkfjd official merch... >___< we were supposed to head back to our hotelwtvr after gpinf to alihabara#akihabara** but while waiting to reload the card thing. i spotted the official yostar store and :)) YAY#so got a little standee. for arknights. 1 for me 1 for my twin but it's gachafied and the fucking. thing. is.#every chara u cld get was basically a fav of mine ESP. TEQUILA. HOLY FUCK. MY ABSOLUTE JOY SEEING HIM.#but the two we got... were both my my Twin's favs... who i also like but. they are Not my faves. :)#so apparently just in general my gacha luck really sucks.#even w the gbf pins. artemis managed to get BELIAL and then for me uhh. ok we got 1 for a surprise gift for a friend#they r not active on tumblr atm i think so shhh anyway so basically anyway. i cld have gotten sandalphon. or other ppl. and i got two charas#i DO like but... more are arti's favs than mine still..... haha. at least w the ffxiv coasters we had equal luck. Amazing luck.
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amorremanet · 6 months ago
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i enjoy the way complaining in the tags still feels like muttering to myself
#.#..#…#….#…..#mine: tags#wank for ts#kassie hush#i am seriously begging other people who ship ghoulper & lucy to please be fucking normal and not racist about maximus & barb#most people are NOT being shitty which is good and i appreciate that#but goddamn when the people who ARE being shitty and racist show up it’s usually appalling#‘did anybody else get villain turn vibes from maximus??’ no that sounds like a skill issue on your part tbh#‘i can’t like him at all bc i got those vibes’ again: skill issue on your part. also you ship lucy with someone who has physically harmed#her and makes his genuine trauma everyone else’s problem so idk why you’re complaining about maximus doing hypothetical morally dubious shit#(aside from what he actually did in s1 but all of that while not necessarily MORAL was extremely understandable—lying to the brotherhood;#lying to lucy about being knight titus—and frankly i don’t think he did anything wrong in the situation with titus. bastard was threatening#to get maximus hanged over his own fucking incompetence vs. the yaoguai. fuck titus. son of a bitch had it coming.)#i’m just so very fucking tired…… people. we can ship lucy & ghoulper WITHOUT being shitty & racist it is remarkably fucking easy actually#granted i am biased as a multishipper who loves lucymax barbcooper maxcoop danemax & cooplucymax ot3#but fucking still…… i’m not shocked that people are being shitty & racist abt max & barb. just disappointed at how little shit has changed#war never changes & racist fandom discourse doesn’t either ig ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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aozui · 2 months ago
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APHRODITE MENTION RAHHHHHHHHHH
(SHE’S) JUST A PHASE CHAPTER SIX: she’s my collar
masterlist
i made a playlist for this specific chapter! check it out
cw - very suggestive, mentions of alcohol/club scene, mature themes !
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“Fuck, it’s cold,” Nobara muttered as she emerged from the sleek black Mercedes, the sharp click of her heels echoing on the pavement. She instinctively wrapped her arms around herself, a futile attempt to fend off the biting chill that cut through the night air.
You pulled your faux cheetah-print coat tightly around herself, desperately seeking any warmth to stave off the biting cold. The regret of wearing a mini skirt settled heavily in your chest as the chill seeped through the fabric.
A biting breeze swept through the group as they piled out of the car, their breath visible in the crisp air. They made their way toward the building illuminated in vibrant LED lights, the name "Aphrodite" glowing in an elegant script above the entrance.
Your gaze fell on the line, a serpentine stretch of eager faces winding around the block and bending around a corner. “The line is so fucking long, bro,” you groaned, frustration lacing your voice.
“Don’t worry,” Panda replied absently, his eyes glued to the screen of his phone, fingers tapping away with a rapid rhythm.
Maki arched an eyebrow, her attention shifting to Panda. “Yuta is here too,” she said, a teasing note in her tone.
You opened your mouth, ready to ask if that meant anything significant, but your question was abruptly cut off by a loud, boisterous shout.
“BRO!” a familiar voice rang out, echoing through the night. A white-haired boy emerged from the shadows, his vibrant presence lighting up the crowd.
He approached Panda, effortlessly slipping into a familiar handshake that you had witnessed countless times before. Next, he turned to Maki and Nobara, greeting them with warm, polite hugs, each one filled with camaraderie.
Then, his gaze settled on you, his eyes assessing you from head to toe. He stepped closer, wrapping you in a longer embrace, leaning in to whisper, “You look good.” The words lingered in the air as he pulled away, a playful smirk dancing on his lips.
Turning back to the bouncer, he declared confidently, “They’re with me.” With a gentle tug, he took your hand, guiding you and the group inside, where the warmth and energy of the club settled, wavered to meet them.
As they stepped inside, a wave of warmth and pulsating music flooded over them, wrapping around you like a comforting embrace. Your gaze was immediately drawn to a figure dressed entirely in black, standing near the entrance, seemingly lost in concentration as he studied something written on a piece of paper.
You noticed two beauty spots nestled just above his eyebrows, creating an intriguing contrast against his sharp features. “Huh,” you thought to yourself, curiosity piqued.
Finally, he looked up, his eyes meeting theirs. A subtle smile curved his lips as he offered them a nod, granting approval for them to venture further into the vibrant atmosphere of the venue.
“Yuji’s been so excited to see you again, Yn,” Toge slurred, his words slightly fuzzy, hinting at the drinks he had already indulged in.
They navigated through the bustling crowd to the VIP booth, where three silhouettes lounged comfortably in deep, luxurious velvet seats, their relaxed postures radiating a carefree vibe.
“Yn!” the pink-haired figure shouted, bounding over with infectious energy. He enveloped you in a warm hug, the scent of his cologne mingling with the rich aroma of the venue. Behind you, the others dispersed, finding their place among the group with casual ease.
“God, it’s been so long! You look incredible!” he exclaimed, stepping back to admire her. You couldn’t help but smile brightly at the compliment. But as you turned to respond, your gaze inadvertently drifted over his shoulder. There, a familiar figure leaned casually against the wall, his eyes fixated on you. He drank you in, the intensity of his stare making her heart race, even as he casually swigged from his beer, a hint of mischief playing on his lips.
“Come on, we need to take our traditional six shots!” Yuji said with infectious enthusiasm, grasping your hand and leading you through the thrumming crowd toward the bar. He slid onto a barstool, gesturing for you to join him with an inviting smile.
As he chatted cheerfully with the bartender, his energy radiated around you. He ordered the customary six shots for both of you, but your thoughts drifted back to Megumi and the way he had been staring earlier. Was it just the atmosphere, or did he really look that good? Hold on—were you actually finding him attractive? The guy who seemed like he spent too much time watching stepcest?
“...up.” You snapped back to reality at Yuji’s voice. Looking up, you were met with his bright, doe-like light brown eyes, sparkling with excitement. In front of you stood an array of colorful shots—twelve, to be exact each one a different hue, glinting invitingly in the bar’s dim light.
“BOTTOMS UP!” he shouted, already downing his first shot. A playful smirk spread across your face; there was no way you were going to let him finish first. You swiftly tossed back the first shot, the bitter liquid searing the back of your throat, but it was a thrill that sent warmth coursing through you. This was light work.
With each shot, the world around you faded into a kaleidoscope of sounds and colors. You quickly moved through the shots, feeling the exhilarating buzz rise within you. Soon, you found yourself on your last one, placing the empty glass down and wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. You glanced at Yuji, who was just finishing his own final shot.
“Still can’t outdo you yet, huh?” he said, his gaze lingering on you with a mix of admiration and playful challenge.
Just as you opened your mouth to respond, a hand pressed firmly against your back, sending a jolt of surprise through you. The warmth of the touch felt intimate, and you turned slightly to find a figure looming behind you. A husky voice cut through the air, rich and smooth, as it said, “Can I borrow her for a second?” The tone was both commanding and playful, drawing your attention away from Yuji and into the mystery of the newcomer.
The air around you was instantly infused with the intoxicating scent of the mystery man’s cologne—a deep, sophisticated aroma that reminded you of Maison Margiela. You turned to get a better look, your heart racing as you were met with his piercing green eyes, which seemed to draw you in.
Meanwhile, Yuji sat there, momentarily confused as he processed the situation, glancing between you and the newcomer. But with a shrug and a grin, he waved goodbye, calling out, “Find me later!” before making his way to the dance floor, his energy lighting up the room.
As Yuji disappeared into the crowd, Megumi smoothly slid into the spot where he had just been sitting. You rested your chin on your hand, your gaze fixed on him with a mixture of curiosity and challenge.
“I hope you’re here to apologise,” you said playfully, flicking away an invisible speck from the counter. He met your gaze with a smirk that seemed to reveal a mix of amusement and confidence. Was that his go-to expression? Because right now, it was definitely starting to look punchable.
“Apologise for what? The truth?” he replied, his voice dripping with confidence as he raised his hand to catch the bartender’s attention, eager for a shot.
“Slut-shaming isn’t a good look for your reputation,” you countered, letting out a frustrated sigh. He was undeniably attractive, but the way he spoke was quickly drying up your pussy and killing your mood.
“Intrigue me, Yn,” he said, his sultry tone wrapping around you like a warm breeze. He leaned in closer, his lips brushing against your ear, sending a shiver down your spine.
“If I fuck you tonight, what number will that make me?”
Your breath catches in your throat, and you silently pray he doesn’t notice. Just then, the bartender sets the shot down between you, and you seize the opportunity to reclaim the upper hand.
You grip his jaw, guiding his face closer until your lips are mere centimeters apart. You glance between his lips and his eyes, feeling the tension crackle in the air.
“Oh, baby, don’t you know? I don’t fuck virgins,” you whisper, releasing your grip on his face as you down his shot and head toward the dance floor.
You weave your way toward the dance floor, each step a little unsteady as the pulsating music and vibrant lights overwhelm your senses. The crowd swells around you, a sea of bodies moving in sync, but the energy feels like too much to handle. Frustration and anger churn inside you. Fuck that was your seventh shot. You were no longer thinking with your head but with your vagina instead.
You weave through the pulsating crowd, your gaze searching for the perfect target. When did you become so needy? Finally, you spot the familiar raven-haired boy from earlier, and a smile flickers across your lips. “At least it’s not a stranger this time,” you think, navigating through the bodies that sway and jostle around you.
As you approach, an unexpected wave of self-doubt washes over you. Was he always this tall? His shoulders seem broader, more defined, and the tattoos that snake down his arms catch your eye—when did he get those? You dismiss the thoughts, blaming the alcohol for your hazy perception.
Raising yourself onto your toes, you gently tap him on the shoulder, but the moment he turns around, a rush of regret floods in. His imposing figure towers over you, and a sense of horror grips your chest as you realise this is definitely not Yuji.
“Doll?” his deep voice resonates, cutting through the din of the club, leaving you momentarily speechless as you look up, caught off guard by the intensity of his gaze. You freeze. You can’t move. Why can’t you move?
The all-too-familiar pet name washes over you, and a torrent of memories floods your mind, each one more vivid than the last. Tears prick at the corners of your eyes, threatening to spill over. Suddenly, you feel hands grip your shoulders, pulling you away from the man, away from the chaotic atmosphere of the club, and guiding you outside into the cool night air.
As you slip into the car, the reality hits you: Nobara, Maki, and Panda are all there, their concerned faces surrounding you. In an instant, the dam breaks, and you begin to bawl, the emotions you’ve kept buried for so long surging to the surface like a tidal wave. You lean your head into Maki’s lap, feeling the comforting weight of her presence as she gently brushes your hair back from your face.
Nobara’s soothing touch caresses your skin, her fingers rubbing your back in gentle circles. “Shhh, let it out,” she murmurs softly. “You’re safe with us now.” Their unwavering support wrapping around you like a warm blanket, allowing you to release the pent-up feelings that had been longing for freedom. And then, just like that, darkness fills your vision.
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extras!
• the aphrodite nightclub was a reeference dedicated to my beloved ree and her hq series ‘poker face’ you should definitely check it out here! @aozui thank u once again <3
• omi sneak in there if you squint
• i imagine aphrodite having the same vibe as the percy jackson casino scene highkey
• hm what does spotify have planned out with tridant i wonder…
• madagascar 3 is my shit guys i would watch it RELIGIOUSLY (maybe i am yn guys idk)
• why does the whole band want us idk we’re just hot like that
• it’s all platonic though guys trust LMFAO
• solstice is a reference to my upcoming spiderman kuroo au btw shhhh #shamlesspromoter
• i threw in the toge and panda texts just for fun LMFAO
• a lot of tridant’s gc texts were actually me and abi’s twitter texts LMFAO (ily abi)
• toge is never crowd surfing again after tonight.
• their set was a total of 1 hour and 49 minutes long (yn secretly enjoyed it and was lowkey fangirling)
• guys i had a field day with the written portion SPECIFICALLY THAT ONE QUOYE
• i hope u all listened to the playlist <3 (pls it’s important)
• yn’s ex is…. SUKUNA?
• to beepboplorpz’s ask that’s still in my inbox currently abt when sukuna would debut HERE HE IS😭
• sukuna’s backstory will be mentioned in the next following chapters..
• panda saw yn going to sukuna and INSTANTLY went to intervene #truefriendeventhohesfat
• yn blacked out in the car if it wasn’t obvious
• megumi was lowkey searching for her on the floor because he thought he was too harsh on her (he cared)
a/n: sorry the chapter is a bit behind schedule but it’s so worth it😭 this was fan service for the thirsty megumi asks so i hope you all eat this up because it took me so long to perfect !! anyways it’s still sunday so it does count… see yall next weekend!! <3 (apologies to my beta readers i was in a rush and wanted this one out but trust im returning back to schedule next week!!)
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