#maura's part of the family

[aflawedfashion]

Maura & Jane (& Angela) | Rizzoli & Isles 2x01

[f4keplastictr33s]

nobody talks about the fact that blue was in fact bullied for being a psychic’s daughter and i think that’s probably why she has this defense mecanism where she appears more tough than she actually is .. ? idk i just love blue sargent so much man and im sick when people dismiss her character or reduce her to the boys bc she’s so much MORE than that

[rudnitskaia]

From the recent talk with my husband. xdd

Andrew: So Mau and Rocky only have her father from the older relatives, right?

Me: Why, there's also Nina. Just imagine what their first meeting with Augusto would've been. :D

Andrew: Well, he is Italian. A spectacular man. He'll manage.

Me: Mm-hm, yeah, Augusto is like: "Piacere di conoscerla, signora!" and kisses her hand. And Nina blushes and shyly giggles in response. While both Freckle and Rocky are panicking in the background with their faces screaming "UNDO IT, UNDO IT!!!!!!!!"

Andrew: Come on, it'll be fine, both Italian and Irish people are catholic. I'm sure Nina and Gusto will get along well!

Me, chuckling: Maaaybe, but not in a romantic way. That would've been a totally disastrous marriage for countless reasons. :'D

Andrew with a hilariously sad exhale: Eh, the unfairly forbidden love union of pizza with potatoes... :c

[cabeswaterdrowned]

Blue’s initial feelings of jealousy or insecurity at what Adam not telling her about his home life being so quickly replaced by concern and feeling for him and how horrifying she finds the idea of him not having a family because hers is so central to her identity …. Yeah… she’s so empathetic at her core which I feel gets lost sometimes when her judgemental streak is over focused on which she is very judgmental and I love that about her but like the minute she makes a decision to put that on hold in a sense she’s so empathetic

[reineyday]

idk if im late to the party but i thought it was interesting that 1899 used plato's allegory but never really surfaced passed discussing the shadows vs the fire, only to reveal at the end that they themselves are living the rest of the allegory: theyre running away from the sun that is their reality bc it hurts too much. they prefer the shadows on the wall, the darkness of the cave, bc the light of their reality is too painful for them to accept.

[backmygirlhood]

they're having a dinner with jane's brother's baby mama and her mother and maura is just there and jane said to her 'think how fun fun we're gonna have every thanksgiving, christmas and new year's' and now her and maura are arguing about who's allowed to teach the baby what

[writtenbycassandra]

most female main characters in ya fantasy usually don't have their parents around/are orphans/ran away from home (e.g. the mortal instruments, lockwood & co, a deadly education, ...), which is why there are often no adult figures around to manage the (magical) chaos the teenage characters have to untangle standalone.

but the raven cycle is different — the adults work together with the teen characters, actually listen to them, and try to help them with their quest. blue doesn't have only her friends around to help her out, she also has a giant home with different, female rolemodels. calla, persephone, maura, and all the other aunts and friends — they give blue something most ya characters don't have.

and as the series continues, she also meets the grey man, who becomes a familiar figure for her, too.

instead of having not enough help and support from adults, which is a thing most ya protagonists struggle with, blue has so many people constantly trying to protect, guide, and help her, and i think that's awesome.

she has a family, and they're actually a part of the story.

[julieverne]

Maura doesn't like sleeping next to anybody.

She was raised alone. The nurses never held her when she woke at night, and Constance was rarely home. Even if she had been, she was hardly the comforting sort. Stiff upper lip and all that. Maura learned to soothe herself, to read until the nightmares faded. Always scared and not sure why until she got older and realised her parents hadn't really wanted her; her in particular. Any child would have done. They'd just needed an heir to inherit.

It doesn't hurt the way it should; Maura has insulated herself against social harm. She slides inside her own mind and ignores outer stimuli. She doesn't make friends, because she never feels like she has anything to offer them.

She does sleep with men; it's quick and easy. Sometimes it's almost affectionate. But she doesn't stay. She slips out in the night to return to her own bed, disturbed by the heavy breathing and restless body next to hers. She doesn't get attached. She rarely goes back for seconds, unless they're exceptionally good at what they do to her. She's a poor little orphan with nothing to offer except her vast fortune, intelligence and smoking hot body.

Oh, she knows she's hot. It's part of why she's so reticient. People used to try to befriend her for her money or to use her in other ways.

Maura has enough self-respect not to let herself be used.

When Jane asks to stay, Maura doesn't hesitate.

They're tentative friends by now; Jane will bring a hot coffee down to the morgue with her if they've swung by a coffee shop on their way back to the precinct. She offers what meagre foodstocks she keeps in her desk; tuna and ramen, for the shelf-life. She's held an umbrella over Maura's head while she crouched over a victim. She's gruff and grumpy, but she's never disingenuous. Not with Maura. Maura knows Jane has other places to go; she has people in her life. She has strong family bonds, at least. She doesn't think Jane has friends either; not since Hoyt. No one ever really knows what to say after something like that happens to you. But Jane has a mother and father. Maura has met them both; they come in to scold her and bring her food when she works overnight. She has two brothers. Maura's met one and he's lovely but Jane is a finished product and he's awkward. Maura used to like awkward because she was awkward too. Jane is awkward in her own way.

She turns to Maura, probably because she doesn't think anyone will think to look for her there. Maura agrees readily. She bought this house and it echoes with loneliness. Jane's casual cheer could lighten it up.

And it does. Even though Jane is being taunted by a serial killer, she jokes and looks relaxed. It isn't until Bass knocks something that she springs upright, pulled taut by fear.

Maura reaches for her and Jane accepts Maura's fingers on her bare skin, lets Maura lower her back to the bed. Jane had joked about sleepovers and tits and best friends and Maura's never had any of those - well, she has tits. They're spectacular, so she's told. But now she's curious about Jane's, wondering why she suggested they get topless together.

Jane doesn't settle easily. She fidgets and talks late into the night. She falls asleep mid-sentence, still fighting it.

Maura watches her. She looks suprisingly sweet and vulnerable as she sleeps, and Maura is proud that Jane wanted Maura to protect and guard her. Her hand is still on Jane's arm, and when she tries to remove it so she can sleep in her own bed, Jane rolls over and traps Maura's arm beneath her, settling with her breath brushing Maura's hair and ear. She moves again, sliding herself onto Maura, so their bodies are aligned.

Maura moves her arm so it rests on Jane's back and she feels Jane relax and nuzzle closer into her. She hears Jane's contended sigh.

Maura doesn't like sleeping next to anyone. But with Jane nestled against her, she can't quite remember why.

[galactic-pirates]

lol just looked at the tags on the Rizzles gifset I reblogged last and somebody put “secretly married” and my brain instantly went “oh gosh what if that were true???”

And there is a surprising lack of fanfic.

But think about it. Work wise for them everything is the same. They are both professionals, both care a lot about their jobs. So people that don’t know them wouldn’t know. There is the energy, the small smiles - the flirting over the dead bodies as gifset said - but it could be considered something else at a stretch. It’s enough that an observer couldn’t be sure, but they’d think maybe something was going on.

And I just find the interaction ideas between those that know they are married, and newbies who don’t, to be hilarious. So many ways to have people talk and not actually be understanding the same thing. And then the wonderful reveal of a casual “oh yeah married” and the reaction.

I don’t know. I think it would be fun and it’s really not a stretch. Maura is already very much part of Jane’s family. It would be the show pretty much as it is, just without the C-plot guy dates ever so often.

Rizzoli and Isles… but they were married all along :)

[romantichopelessly]

invitation to speak more about the secret good td3 in your head, if you so desire!

Ok so I sat on this ask for DAYS because I wanted to have some cohesive, great answer, but the thing about The Dreamer Trilogy that haunts me is that I can never come up with good concrete thoughts about how to fix the issues I have with it, which is why I reference the “secret good td3 in my head” because it can never fully leave my head in any real way. That being said here’s a list of some elements I would change to make my secret good td3, in no particular order.

The visionaries don’t exist. Liliana, Persifal, etc. are just psychics that keep getting visions of the end, and die for reasons other than their power. Explaining what Visionaries are and subsequently over explaining the magic system of td3 is part of what made the trilogy so confusing and ruined a lot of the magic that the TRC universe already had for me. We don’t need concrete explanations, and psychics can still fill this role. The changing age and exploding added nothing?? to the narrative?? that I can think of?? We can even keep the age gap for Carliana if we want to, just make Liliana an older psychic like Maura/Persephone/Calla. It will even add to the excellent Carmen-Mr. Gray parallels.

Lean more into the themes of the age group. TRC is a coming of age story. It’s about being 17/18. It’s about learning your inner self and getting others to see the true you. TD3 should be more about being 19/20/21. To me, TD3 at its peak is like Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 6. Which is uniquely about the horror of being in your early 20s, losing support systems, having to learn to be a full self-reliant person, grappling with what your parents did to you, and the crushing loneliness of not being around Your People anymore. TD3 has all of these themes, but I really think they need to be fleshed out more, and given proper conclusion that isn’t just “yippee everything is fine now!”

Greywaren is longer. I think almost everyone agrees that Greywaren, as a book was just too short to wrap up all the plot lines set up, and does almost none of them justice. That book needed a whole rewrite. In theory, I’m completely fine with how it opens—Ronan being in a dream coma was foreshadowed from CDTH, and is an idea that I’d actually thought of as interesting before even reading the book. Other elements of this book like Declan’s rampage, Matthew going rogue, etc are great directions for the characters, I’d just want to rework them. I could make solo posts about any of these.

The Pynch breakup either doesn’t happen, or is set up further in advance and lasts longer. Personally, I lean towards the latter. Adam and Ronan’s conflict is set up from the very beginning of CDTH, or even from Opal (Adam warring between wanting to stay with Ronan and needing to follow through with his lifelong plans, and being frustrated that Ronan never asks for anything from Adam (specifically, to stay) ((side note: perhaps Adam’s insecurity here about Ronan respecting his boundaries so thoroughly stems from both having a family that never would respect his wishes, and Gansey (Adam’s model of love, Adam’s model of everything) having to learn not to ask things like that of Adam. What does it mean that Ronan never even tries?)) AND Ronan dealing with the crushing loneliness of being left and dealing with the consequences of having a long distance bf who is more successful than him). So they needed to have an argument about this. It’s also just in character that these two would not be perfect communicators. So. My idea: In CDTH we get no Adam POVs, just Ronan’s side of the story. We see, rather than Ronan just getting upset over one missed text, that Adam begins to pull away after the murder crab incident. We the audience don’t know why, other than Ronan’s unreliable narration and insecurity. So when Adam doesn’t respond to that one text at a vital fraught time, Ronan does what he does best, shuts down, pulls away and self destructs. Then MI rolls around and we start getting Adam POVs. We learn that after the murder crabs, Adam was throwing himself into trying to fix the nightwash situation for Ronan (Adam is not in contact with Declan here, unfortunately). After visiting for Ronan’s birthday and seeing the Lace, Adam starts to have dreams/premonitions about the end of the world (no visionaries in this universe, just psychics who are/were close to dreamers getting the visions!!). So he obviously sets out to fix this alone too. He calls his best approximations to contacts in this underground world that aren’t Declan. Henry and Mr. Gray. (+ maybe also Maura & Calla) ((Also don’t worry Henry doesn’t leave the Sarchengsey trip, just advises Adam on where to start)). Now that Adam has lost contact with Ronan (he was busy and missed the message and Ronan went off the grid like in canon), he goes full throttle into trying to solve everything while managing being his perfect Harvard persona (this gets him close to a breakdown, very reminiscent to Dream Thieves). Perhaps we get to see Adam and Declan working together to acquire sweet metals and understand the underworld of magic together. He and Ronan fight the one time they get to talk over the phone, Adam because he is truly scared Ronan will be the one to end the world, Ronan because he feels like this is another person perceiving him as a failure and wanting to control/baby him (+ he hates Adam hanging with Mr Gray and Declan of all people). By the time Greywaren starts, Adam is wrung out and hurting and Ronan is dead to the world, so yeah. He doesn’t think he can spend emotional energy playing safeguard to his boyfriend’s coma corpse. And then by the end of the book they have an actual argument/discussion no “they didn’t need words” cop out.

The number of Dreamers/Dreams has to be reduced. It’s cool to say that dreams were always integrated into this world, but it creates so many plot holes it isn’t even funny. There is no way Niall could have passed off the Greywaren being a box that brings dreams to life if Dreamers were such a common occurrence. No secret can be kept that well, someone in the black market would have known, and thus Greenmantle/Mr. Gray/Laumonier/ect WOULD HAVE KNOWN !!!

Declan does not have all his character erased by suddenly loving his mommy and daddy. Seriously what the fuck was that. Declan suddenly deciding to forgive his father because actually Declan was secretly the favorite child first is INSANE. Especially after seeing that that changed because Niall and Mor WANTED TO KILL HIS BROTHER!!! The two tenants of Declan Lynch in TRC were protecting his remaining family and fucking hating that Ronan idolized Niall just because Niall loved him best. So why make Declan turn around and do the same??? Suddenly Niall wasn’t so bad because actually he let Declan be shoved into a car trunk during a shootout out of love. I hate this plot line. Family doesn’t have to be forgiven. Understood, that’s one thing. Forgiven?? Not always. Sick of it. The real takeaway from seeing those memories should have been closure to Declan’s arc of learning that dreams should be viewed as people completely.

I definitely have other points but I cannot think of them right now. And I want to post this so I will. But TD3, as you can see, makes me an insane person.

[sweetbonniebel]

Unbent,unbowed,unbroken

Chapter 1

Aemond/ Aegon/ Jacaerys x fem! Targaryen! Martell! reader

Synopsis: (y/n) Martell the daughter of Gael Targaryen and Morion Martell has been invited to join court in King’s landing, she was to stay with her Targaryen family away from Dorne.

Chapter two

Sunspear 112 ac

As the cries of the babe were heard, Gael sighed in relief as her handmaiden Maura patted at her sweaty forehead. But as the newborn was being swaddled by nurses, the Targaryen's princess breathing got slower.

"Your highness?!" Maura exclaimed noticing the poor state of the princess, her worried tone alerted the maester and septas. They quickly moved to Gael but before the grand maester could help the Targaryen princess her gentle heart fell silent.

"My wife! Where is my wife!?" The head of the house Morian Martell stormed into the chambers of his young wife.

„I’m sorry my prince… her highness passed away.” The maester spoke solemnly, his gaze lowered and hands stained with his wife’s blood.

“The child..?” He searched for good news among the septas and nurses. Maura stepped forward with the calm babe wrapped in golden bundles.

The prince of Dorne quickly moved away from the maester and quickly took his newborn child in his arms.

“It’s a girl, my prince.” Maura spoke quietly, Morian nodded his head and passed the babe to her wet nurse.

“Send word to kings landing, the funeral will take place here as quickly as possible. Now get out…all of you.” The prince said moving towards the cold body of his wife.

The young princess looked ethereal, even in death. Her silver locks spread on the silk sheets, plump rosy lips parted slightly, her large violet eyes closed and long lashes wet from tears. Morian took the dainty hand of Gael kissing it gently ,holding it dearly in his hands, he mourned the loss of his wife.

The bells rang loudly on Sunspear, alerting the people of the princess’s passing.

Sunspear 122 ac

The princess (y/n) Martell, ten years of age, watched her younger step siblings play with various toys. The prince of Dorne along his second wife watched their children in amusement. (y/n) however was more interested in the heavy book that laid in her lap, she sat in the shade of the large tree leaning on its strong roots. The sun rays lightly illuminated the princess curly silver locks, giving her an almost ethereal glow. The book the young Martell princess was reading told the story of the Lady Nymeria who conquered Dorne hundreds of years ago.

An envoy walked into the family gardens disturbing the domestic bliss of the Martells.

“My prince, you along with your family have been summoned to kings landing to attend the forty name day of his grace King Viserys!” He spoke loudly and (y/n) pulled her nose out of her book, intrigued by the news. She had heard of the Targaryen King many times from her father and other courtiers. The tragic death of his late wife queen Aemma, the succession crisis, the wedding of Viserys and his bride Alicent Hightower and the birth of their son Aegon.

Prince Morian stepped towards the envoy’s taking the letter from his hands, and examining it himself. The princess quickly shuffled towards her father leaving the book in the grass, picking up her youngest brother Myrcel. He babbled at his elder sister, taking her silver curly locks into his chubby hands and putting it in his mouth. Lady Elara the second wife of Morion Martell, picked up the youngest son from her stepdaughter.

“Do not put your sister hair into you mouth Myrcel.” She cooed at her baby, and the princess smiled at her mother figure.

“Leave us” The prince spoke sternly and moved back to his family, examining the details of the invite. He placed his large hand on the top of his daughter’s head, petting it gently.

“Will we be going to Kings landing?” She asked, leaning into her father’s touch. He nodded solemnly, something was bothering the prince of Dorne.

“Yes my little dragon, you will have a chance to meet your mother’s family.” He nodded and smiled at his wife warmly. “The maids shall pack our belongings immediately and we shall set sail.”

Kings Landing 122 ac

“Lord Morios Martell and Lady Elara Allyrion we welcome you to King’s Landing, we thank you for your presence.” The master of whispers Larys Strong welcomed the Dornish family. “Princess (y/n) Martell the queen Alicent has requested to meet you in her solar.” The limping man announced. You looked at your father unsure, he nodded and pushed you slightly towards lord Strong.

You followed meekly after the limping man, his cane clicked with every step making an echo. The halls of the red keep were empty, the ceiling high and banners of the seven hung from the walls. You looked around the massive architectural masterpiece build by Aegon the conqueror, guards standing at every corner.

Lord Larys Strong stopped at the massive door, he nodded at the guards that were posted on each side. They nodded and opened the heavy doors, the princess walked in, the master of whisperers stayed behind. The queen was standing in front of the mirror a handmaid fixing her dark green gown with golden threads, her chestnut hair masterfully braided embedded with beautiful pearls.

“Ah lady (y/n)!” The queen exclaimed cheerfully, she dismissed her handmaiden and walked over, her hands wrapped in front of her. The young Martell bowed gracefully.

“It is an honor to meet you, your grace.” She said kindly, queen Alicent nodded and placed her slender palm on the girls cheek. She stared deeply into her eyes, one green one violet.

“What a unique beauty you have my dear.” The doors suddenly opened the queen looked over and took a deep breath. “My love.” She began but was ignored by his grace himself. The Martel princess bowed deeply again, her gaze settled on her shoes.

“Please rise lady (y/n).” He wheezed tiredly, she did as was told. The king plopped down on the chair in the middle of his wives solar. “Please do come here. As she shuffled closer to the king he let out a strained chuckle, he placed his bony hand on the girls cheek. “Those eyes, they are just like my mothers.” He muttered and caressed the princesses hair. “Your mother was the favorite sister of my father, he spoke oh so fondly of her. He was heartbroken when king Jahearys offered her to Dorne.”

“Thank you, your grace. I haven’t had the pleasure to meet my mother, she died minutes after my birth. However my father spoke fondly of her.” She said, the young girl felt a sense of belonging next to the king.

“I’m sorry to hear that, my father and mother were heartbroken at the news of Gaels passing.” He sighed deeply and leaned into his chair, the queen sat down next to her husband.

“(y/n) my dear, the king himself has requested your presence at the royal table during the celebration.” Alicent said warmly “You will be seated next to prince Aegon and Aemond and princess Haelena along with princes Jacearys and Lucerys” The Martell princess nodded at her graces words. “You can return to your chambers to prepare for the celebration, ser Criston Cole will escort you.”

…

(y/n) Martell was visited by her father in her chambers. The maid was finishing tying up the exquisite yellow dress, the colors of her house, the other maid was braiding her silver hair, putting jasper crystals in her hair. Her father stood behind her, the princess could see the unhappy expression in the mirror.

“My sweet daughter… you look beautiful. I’m sure the princes will be breath-taken with you.” He smiled sadly, and took a deep breath. He nodded at the handmaidens to leave they bowed and left silently, leaving father and daughter alone. The princess turned around walking up to her father, her eyebrows slightly raised at the visible displeasure of the dornish prince.

“What seems to be troubling you father?” She asked taking her hands in his, Morion pressed his daughters palms against his forehead.

“Your step mother wanted to tell you this earlier but I couldn’t bring myself to… the queen and king have invited you to join their court, here in kings landing.”

The Martell lady widened her eyes, she knew what that meat. She was to stay permanently in kings landing, leaving her home behind, her father, her siblings, her step mother.

“Her grace insisted you join her daughter’s entourage, It is an great honor my little dragon.” The princess felt as if Lord Martell was not telling the whole truth, however the girl took it with dignity and nodded your head.

As a high born lady, (y/n) had duties she needed to fulfill, she had to do whatever was best for her house. She was raised by the best governesses, septa’s and educated in history, arithmetic’s, sciences, music, dancing, painting; every skill that was suitable for a lady of her status.

…

The feast was a rowdy celebration, the Martell family was announced by ser Harrold, his booming tone put all attention of lords and ladies on them. Lord Morion and lady Elara walked along the great hall, they stopped before the table of the king and queen, and bowed silently.

“Thank you for the invite your grace.” Lady Elara smiled warmly glancing at her husband, he nodded agreeing with his wives words.

The royal couple nodded, and motioned the Martells to sit in their designated spot. As the feast carried on, the doors opened again by ser Criston Cole.

“Lady (y/n) Martell of the blood of the dragon!” Ser Harrold boomed, all the guests turned curiously at the mention of the young Targaryen princess. Her silver locks were skillfully braided, the jasper crystals flickered from the light of candles, what everyone seemed to focus on were the eyes of the young girl.

Her yellow dress flowed gracefully with every movement. She glanced at her family on the right, her father and step mother nodded and motioned for her to continue to his grace.

“Your graces, I am humbled by your decision and I am graceful for the opportunity.” The Martell princess bowed elegantly.

…

[bmadams-blog1]

And love will always remain between us

Rating: T

Trigger Warnings: Mentions of death

Pairing: Maura Isles/Jane Rizzoli

Characters: Maura Isles, Jane Rizzoli, Original character

Synopsis: Maura gets a visit from someone she never thought she would see again. This visit comes bearing news she was not expecting, but she would soon realise that whatever she held grudges against wouldn't matter anymore.

#rizzoliandislesecretsanta2024 @rizzoliandislesecretsanta

Gift for: @Starkillerbass

Words: 3,951

Merry Christmas Starkillerbass! I've used part from both of the prompts you've given me (Sort of 😅), but my muses just went down a strange path. I hope you like it and enjoy your Secret Santa. Please forgive any grammatical mistakes and errors.

Also posted on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/61548790

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dr. Maura Isles couldn’t believe her eyes, even though all the proofs were there, right before her. The lanky, tall, determined teenager she hadn’t seen in almost a year stood just in front of her. The teen she had met as a small girl had become a beautiful young teen. She had softer features than her mother’s but the same unmistakable expressive chocolate brown eyes and unruly hair, though a light shade of brown. Maura felt her knees go weak. The girl had grown in the year they had been apart, and she thought that, after hell broke loose, she wouldn’t see her gain.

For Maura Isles, it was the profound betrayal she felt; the actual events of that fateful day weren’t what made something break inside her but was what was said and what followed that made her bitter. She had felt throughout her whole life how people came and left her life without much issue. She knew people weren’t meant to stay in her life, it was all fleeting moments and memories. Until that untameable, sarcastic, sassy, but so kind, compassionate and generous woman came into her life and showed her that family wasn’t determined by the blood that flowed through the veins but by the love professed from and to each member, she not only met her best friend in that woman, but she also met the closest thing to a daughter she would ever have, the closes thing to a real mother, one that would go out of her way to make her favourite dish, one that was overbearing and nosy and obnoxious at times, but one that would give her everything to see her happy and healthy, she would even get the closes thing to siblings she would have. She found in her not only her best friend and a family, but she would get to meet what she would say was the love of her life, even if it was unilateral.

The girl looked tired, her hair in a messy ponytail, her face showed she hadn’t slept in a while, absolutely no make-up on, and her clothes had seen better days. She was slouching and nervous. The girl had never been a fashion victim, much like her mother, but she would have a better sense of fashion and wouldn’t leave her house looking uninterested in her appearance.

Maura’s mouth parted open, unable to utter words, partly in surprise at seeing the girl there and partly because she knew something must have happened for the teen to have found her.

“I can’t believe you told Dean!?” Maura growled at the brunette detective. “You went behind my back and told Dean Paddy was my biological father!?... Are you fucking serious?” Her voice was loud and incredulous, trying to understand what was happening. Her mother had been run over, she had been caught in the crossfires of an investigation, her biological father had been shot by her best friend whilst she tried to protect her friend with benefits, and now she came to the knowledge that she had told him who her biological father was after having intercourses. What Maura felt wasn’t anger. It was a pure and utter betrayal.

“Maura I…” Jane began saying but was cut off by the blonde M.E.

“Save it, Jane!” Maura coldly said, “You shot him!”

“Come on, Maura. I had to do it! Paddy showed up out of nowhere,” Jane tried to reason with her.

“You mean the guy that ran my mother over and tried to shoot me, too!” Maura practically screamed.

“We had a handle on the situation before he showed up!” Jane raised her voice as well, getting frustrated.

“Oh! You mean you, Dean had a handle on it? Thanks for letting me know agent Dean was planning to join us!” The blonde spat bitterly. “You know what, I don’t care, I just…. Get lost, Jane,” Maura said, leaving the crime scene. Leaving a very confused and angry brunette.

The days that followed their altercation were a blur. Maura didn’t know how to cope. All the people she knew and considered her family were in her life because of Jane. She had no one to turn to, so she did the only thing she thought would help her. Move away. She avoided everyone, even the teen who had become more her daughter than simply the daughter of her friend. She sent her resignation through the post and began looking for a new horizon in her career. Her immediate first move was to move to a hotel to avoid Angela, who lived in her guest house and who Jane had made choose who she would side with. She chose Jane. She was her real daughter. That was the final nail in Maura’s coffin. She kept tabs on her mother’s stay in the hospital and subsequent rehabilitation. She kept tabs on Paddy, who, shortly after his release from the hospital, was put into Jail all the way across the country. She left a letter for the girl and nothing else. She vanished from Boston.

Now, there she was, the girl standing in front of her, and she was unable to speak. “Hi,” the girl whispered, standing still in front of the surprised doctor. She had rehearsed this encounter since she left Boston the previous day. But now, now she didn’t know how to speak. She hadn’t seen this woman in almost a year, she tried to look for her, God knows she tried as much as she could, but to no avail, she couldn’t. She gave up a month after the woman had left. Until one day, almost three months after her Aunt’s disappearance, her mother had a seizure in the kitchen while talking to her uncle Frankie about the current score of the Red Sox against the Yankees.

A whirlwind of medical tests followed, only to discover a tumour, one in an area of the detective’s brain that they couldn’t operate. Jane had complained for weeks about headaches and being more tired than usual, having difficulty waking up and less focus at work. But all those symptoms were attributed to the stress she had been under since the warehouse disaster. Now, she was at the hospital, holding onto all the strength she could to be able to see that blonde M.E. again. And her daughter was determined to make that one last wish come true.

“Cla…Claire,” Maura mouthed, not trusting her words.

The girl nodded. “I know you might not want to see me, but…” The girl began saying but was stopped by a bone-crushing hug. One she had been craving for almost 12 months.

“You still use the same perfume?” The girl said, drowning in the familiar scent.

Maura separated herself from the teen, who was already almost an inch taller than her. She took a long look at her before speaking, placing her hand sweetly on the girl's cheek. “How did you… What are you doing here?” Maura asked, her eyes glassy and with unshed tears.

The girl swallowed thickly and leaned into the familiar warmth of the touch “I managed to find your mother and asked her,” She simply said, smirking lightly.

Maura nodded and made the girl step into the house. The teen took a brief look around the living room. Beautifully and elegantly decorated. Maura nudged her to sit on the couch. She wanted to ask many questions, but principally, she wanted to know what the teen was doing at her house. She knew something had happened. The blonde took the hands of the teen in hers

“Mama’s dying,” The teen simply said before letting out tears.

The doctor was taken aback, and her eyebrows raised in surprise and disbelief. “What?” She blurted out without even noticing the words coming out of her mouth. She felt as if the hair had been sucked out of her longs by a blunt force.

The girl simply nodded and looked down. Maura sharply inhaled. Her lungs felt like lead. Breathing was hard for her right there. “What do you mean, sweetie?” She managed to ask.

“She got something called GBM.” The teen said, looking back up to the blonde. Now, two fat tears rolled down her cheeks. Maura gently wiped the tears from her cheeks.

“Glioblastoma Multiforme” Maura’s heart sank at the thought of the illness she knew was, in most cases, a death sentence. Maura took a deep breath before being able to speak again. “Since when?”

The girl looked down. “Since August.” She said, looking at her hands on her lap, enveloped in the soft hands of the older woman. “She fainted one day out of the blue, and it took the doctors a couple of weeks to understand why,” She explained.

Maura nodded; she had many questions in her head, so many she couldn’t prioritise with one to ask first: “What have the doctors said?” She asked, being purposely vague so the girl could be able to give her any information she felt comfortable sharing.

“It’s bad,” She said, letting another tear roll down her cheek. “I know you and Ma aren’t friends anymore, but I…but I need you. I am going to lose Ma; I can’t lose you too.” The girl practically pleaded, looking at the woman with bloodshot eyes.

“Hey, hey, hey.” Maura shushed the girl and cupped her face between her hands. “That doesn’t matter,” she said, looking intently into the chocolate eyes of the girl. “Whatever happens, I will be there for you…I’m sorry I left how I did. Things were...complicated, but it doesn’t matter. Whatever you need, I’m here, sweetie; I am not going to leave you ever again,” She said, finally taking her hands from the girl’s cheeks and hugging her. Claire was practically sitting on Maura’s lap by now, holding on to the blonde for dear life.

The girl sniffled. “She loves you”, She whispered in the hiding crook of Maura’s neck.

Finally, Maura released the tears she had been holding since she opened the door. “I love her too,” Maura truthfully said resting her cheek on the messy hair of the girl.

Claire shook her head. “No, she’s in love with you,” she said barely above a hushed whisper.

Maura nodded and softly chuckled. “Me too,” she said, not releasing her hold on the girl.

“Then why did you two just drift away?” Claire asked. Maura sat silently, her mind racing. She had buried her pain and resentment under layers of logic and distance, but hearing Claire’s plea cracked something open inside her. Jane, the woman who had been her other half in so many ways, was dying. And despite everything, Maura knew she couldn’t ignore this call.

“We didn’t know what to do with our feeling and the circumstances” She said almost cryptically. Maura broke the hug to look at the girl. “Things were complicated and messy, and we didn’t know what to do with our feelings and what happened that day…I promise I will explain myself,” Maura said truthfully. “Now, let's go home,” She simply said, standing up and holding her hand out for the girl to grab it.

A few hours later, both Maura and the girl were en route to Boston. They had still more than 8 hours to reach Boston. Maura felt a strange bliss having Claire sleeping beside her with her head resting against the window. But she was torn. She couldn’t believe Jane had a tumour in her brain and, as per the girl’s words, was about to die. Her heart was heavy. The pain and the emptiness that had been living in her were weighing heavily on her. She had spent months trying to bury herself with work so she wouldn’t remember those last words they said to each other. Both spiteful and rageful, all said in the heat of the moment and with little care. The M.E. had gone over those words many times, to the point of having them memorised. They hurt still, but not for the same reason, but because they weren’t capable of putting their pride and own hurt aside and resolve the issue. They simply carry the hurt and let it drive their emotions on high.

She looked to the said and extended her hand to take a strand of flyaway hair from the girl’s face and tucked it behind her ear. She could still remember the day she met Jane, dressed as a prostitute, fighting with Stanley at the Division One Café because she couldn’t find her wallet to pay for coffee and pancakes for the kid. And she couldn’t forget the indignant face of the woman and the sparkle in the eyes of the little girl with two pigtails bouncing next to her. Maura drove the whole night, only stopping to fill her gas tank. As the sun started rising on the horizon she could see the outline of the city that held a piece of her heart and many memories. She was also beginning to feel the exhaustion in her body. She has been driving for 11 hours straight. She could only imagine the journey the girl must have done to reach her. Claire confessed to her that she had come to find her without telling her mother and had vaguely told Angela her plan. But the girl’s goal was to reach her for her mother and herself.

As they started to hit some early morning traffic getting into the city, the girl woke up, her left hand being warmly held by the woman’s hand. “Hey,” She said

“Hey,” Maura said with a faint smile appearing across her lips. “Where to?” she then asked, holding her smile in place at the sight of those sleepy eyes that still carried that childlike sparkly.

“Mass general,” she said, sighing.

Maura nodded and drove towards the hospital. She was equally dreading and dreaming about the moment that she would be able to lay eyes on that slim, strong and caring woman, the moment she would be able to lay eyes on those unruly, messy, and so full curls, the moment she would be able to see those dimples that appear on the face of the woman every time she faintly smiled at her. She wanted to see her and be able to be sincere in herself and her feelings for each other.

It was a cold morning, colder than they had anticipated. Maura and Claire finally arrived at the hospital. Jane was lying in her bed, pale and thin, the once sharp edge of her features dulled by the illness. She didn’t know Maura was on her way. Claire guided her to the hospital room Jane was in. The teen door creaked open, and Maura stood in the doorway, her eyes scanning the room before settling on Jane. It felt like a lifetime had passed, but the bond between them had never entirely broken. Not truly.

Time seemed to stand still. Maura was trying to understand the scene before her eyes. Jane, the once strong, athletic and passionate woman who had saved her many times, laid in bed, thinner and paler than she had ever seen her, the signs of the illness obvious in her battered body. She even looked small in the hospital bed. Jane, the indomitable detective who had faced down serial killers and stared death in the face countless times, was fighting an unwinnable battle.

Claire walked in first, leaving Maura at the door, without noticing the tears that fell from the doctors’ eyes. “Hi, Mama,” the teen whispered, caressing her mother’s cheek. Slowly, the brunette opened her eyes, locking her gaze with the sight of her daughter.

“Hey, baby girl,” She said, her voice hoarse from the months of sickness. The woman, with a lot of difficulty, raised her hand to caress the girl’s cheek. Claire showed a faint smile and adverted her gaze towards the door. Making her mother look in the same direction. But she was surprised by the figure at the door. “Maur,” She whispered incredulously. There was disbelief in her tone as if she had imagined the moment.

“She’s here, Ma” Claire smiled at her mother.

Maura finally was able to gather enough courage to walk into the room; she decided to be bold and approach the bed directly, “I’m here,” Maura said simply, her voice filled with both sadness and relief.

Jane looked confused at her daughter, who smiled at her and nudged her to look back at the blonde who was standing next to her hospital bed. “I didn’t think I would see you again,” Jane admitted, her own tears threatening to fall. “Not after what I did.”

Maura shook her head while she cleaned the tears that had made their way down her cheeks. “I’m here. I’ll always be here.” The room was silent for a long moment, the tension palpable, but neither woman could deny what had always been there.

“I don’t know how to make up for what happened,” Jane finally spoke, her voice shaking. “I was selfish, and I hurt you… I hurt us. But Maura, I need you to know…” She faltered, her hand reaching out, trembling. “I love you. I always have.” Jane’s voice was small, the weight of her regret pressing down on her. “I don’t expect you to forgive me right now. I just needed you to know. I’m sorry.”

Maura’s chest tightened. The words were both a balm and a wound, a truth that had been buried for so long. “Jane,” Maura began. “What happened is not important right now. The only thing that matters is that we are together right now, and we’ll never be apart again,” Maura reassured. “I didn’t know how much I needed you until you weren’t there,” Maura admitted, her tears falling freely now. “And then I was too proud to come back.”

Jane’s hand tightened around hers, surprising Maura with its strength. “I’m the one who pushed you away. I broke us, Maura,” Jane hoarsely said before looking back at the hazel eyes that were now brimming with unshed tears “I was so afraid of losing you, so I didn’t let myself... didn’t let you see how I really felt.”

“You don’t have to say it,” Maura whispered. “I know.”

“No, you don’t.” Jane’s voice wavered, but she pushed through. “I love you, Maura. Not just as a friend. I’ve always loved you.”

Tears filled Maura’s eyes. “Jane...” Maura leaned closer, her forehead resting against Jane’s. “I love you too, Jane. I always have, and I always will.” For the first time in almost a year, they found solace in each other. Jane’s lips trembled as Maura gently pressed a soft, chaste kiss to her forehead. It was a kiss filled with longing, forgiveness, and the deep bond they had always shared. Jane closed her eyes, letting herself feel the warmth of Maura’s presence, something she had missed for so long.

They remained with their hands together for a little while, just taking in everything that had unfolded, not only in the past 24 hours but in the past months since the last time they were together. Jane closed her eyes for a few minutes, the exhaustion of the emotions coming to her like a crashing wave.

The hospital was quiet that early morning. Claire decided to go to grab some coffee for herself and Maura, not without giving her mother a kiss on the cheek and a strong and long hug to Maura. She left the room to give her mother and Maura much-needed time alone. Jane rested, her breathing uneven but steady. Maura sat beside her, their hands intertwined, neither of them wanting to let go.

Jane opened her eyes a little late, and she broke the silence, her voice barely above a whisper. “You’re still here.”

Maura smiled softly. “Of course, I am here. I’m not going anywhere.”

Jane studied her, her eyes heavy with emotion. “You’re still so beautiful,” she murmured.

A blush rose to Maura’s cheeks, but her heart ached at the vulnerability in Jane’s voice. She leaned in slightly, her gaze locking with Jane’s. “I missed you so much,” she said, her voice trembling.

Jane raised a shaky hand, brushing a strand of Maura’s hair behind her ear. “I missed you too.”

For a moment, they were lost in each other’s presence, the weight of the past year melting away. Maura leaned closer, their foreheads touching, before pressing a soft, chaste kiss on Jane’s lips. It was brief, gentle, and filled with unspoken promises.

When Maura pulled back, Jane’s eyes glistened with tears. “I think that was worth waiting for,” she said with a faint smile.

Maura let out a quiet laugh, her own tears falling freely. “I’m just sorry it took this to finally be able to taste your lips.”

Jane’s smile faded slightly, and her expression grew serious. “Maura…there’s something I need to ask you.”

“Anything,” Maura replied without hesitation.

Jane took a deep breath, her fingers tightening slightly around Maura’s. “Claire… she’s going to need someone. Someone who’ll love her, guide her, and keep her safe when I’m not here anymore.”

“Jane…” Maura tried to interject, but Jane didn’t let her.

“Please, Maura,” Jane interrupted gently, her voice breaking. “Promise me you’ll take care of Claire. She adores you, and I know you’ll give her the kind of love and stability she deserves. You’ve been her mother, too. Since you met us, you have always been there for her,” Jane pleaded.

Tears streamed down Maura’s face as she nodded. “I promise,” she said, her voice firm despite her trembling lips. “I’ll be there for her, always. You don’t have to worry about that.”

Relief washed over Jane’s face, and she exhaled slowly. “Thank you. That means everything to me.”

Maura leaned down, brushing her lips gently against Jane’s lips again, this time deepening the kiss before separating, indulging in the sweet taste of her lips. “You mean everything to me,” she whispered. They stayed like that for a little, wrapped in the warmth of each other’s presence, the past and the future set aside. Maura leaned in closer, her hand cradling Jane’s face. “And you don’t have to thank me,” she said softly. “I love her too, Jane. She’s as much a part of my heart as you are.”

Jane raised a shaky hand to brush a strand of hair from Maura’s face, her fingers lingering for a moment on her cheek. “You’ve always been my constant, Maura. Even when I screwed up, you were always there.”

“And I always will be,” Maura whispered, her voice thick with emotion.

Jane’s eyelids grew heavy, exhaustion settling over her. “Stay with me?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper.

“Always,” Maura said, pressing a kiss to Jane’s forehead.

But before she closed her eyes, Jane’s dark eyes searched Maura’s face as if committing every detail to memory. Her gaze softened, and with a trembling hand, she cupped Maura’s cheek. “I need to do one thing once more,” she said.

Before Maura could respond, Jane leaned forward, her lips brushing softly against Maura’s again. This kiss was tender, chaste, and fleeting, yet it held years of unspoken emotions. Love, regret, longing, and hope.

When they pulled apart, Maura rested her forehead against Jane’s, tears slipping down her cheeks. “I love you,” she whispered.

Jane smiled weakly. “I love you too. I always have.” As she drifted off into a light sleep.

“And I always will” Maura stayed by her side, holding her hand and silently vowing to honour Jane’s wish to be there for Claire, to carry on their love, and to ensure Jane’s memory lived on in every moment they shared.

[sunflowersandscreams]

finished the raven boys. exhale.

really good. holy shit what a downward spiral.

adam pressing charges and then slowly losing more and more control, which is one of the most important things to him and reflective of the nature of abuse (taking away someone's control). can't wait to read on to see what the consequences of him sacrificing himself are. also him living with his disability- I personally don't have hearing loss but i always love to read stories with disability elements, whether metaphorical or literal. also interested in if this is it with his family? because it feels like he has more to go through there. i also think there's a risk of him becoming more isolated at the church apartment(?). unsure. also him and blue are so sweet. i hope they don't crash and burn.

ronan- doesn't have the most massive part in this book. with his last line i suspect we'll go more in depth on his dream powers(?) later on. (wish the last scene and ronans line had been a bit more drawn out. it felt jarring and too much too fast). love him so far and hope there's more of his pov in the next book. what a piece of shit (affectionate).

noah- what the fuuuck. man. so I assume he just does not age? how will this relate to the others growing older and moving out and living their own lives? I assume at some point they'll kind of have to let him go? but very curious about who he was before he was a ghost/spirit.

whelk- holy moly. wish we'd gotten a little more on his background but i get that this book is kind of vague and ephemeral with details sometimes. his death felt very impactful because of how quickly his power was stripped away, i think. love the anti-gun sentiment through the book btw. truly nothing has ever been fixed with a gun.

neeve & maura- just a big question mark. especially with neeves ambitions and weird mask stuff. giving me the vibes of an evil mirror twin but I don't think that's the case. Maura i love you. she's sensible but a bit messy, much like blue. I have no idea where the dad plot point is going but eager to find out.

gansey- what's wrong with you fr. he's at his best when he's miserable <3 I love the flashes of him and blue. can't wait to see them fall in love and be star crossed lovers. hate his nickname as well as blue's. i don't see the appeal. fuck he's just so tragic. he falls in love with everyone he meets and he's very genuine but also naive in many ways bc of his privilege. him and ronan augvvh i can't wait to see more. him and Adam are soso bad for each other except when they're not. i can see why many people say polyamory for these people. (or maybe im just in an echo chamber.)

blue- my girl!! she has so much life and energy to her i really want to know why she doesn't have powers similar to her mother's and is only a magic amplifier. i wonder if she'll discover some? I like her interactions and her initial outsider sort of vibe but she's confident enough to fake it til she makes it and get in with the group. I wish they could be happy. love her attraction to everyone in the group, wanting to impress ronan, instant zing with Noah, sweetness with Adam, and banter with gansey. she's very brave but not in a way that feels hashtag badass in some 2010s YA lit. want to see her break down and lose her mind a bit though.

okay! those are my thoughts on characters. as for plot- something is very much starting. it feels like there are layers to this. with more books and gansey having searched in other countries for ley lines i hope we get some more settings outside of Henrietta, but keep a main focus on the town. cabeswater isn't done with them yet and there is something definitely sinister about it. i don't think it's a force for evil but definitely outside human morals and very very powerful.

I'm curious as to how the Latin fits in- to my knowledge this book has elements of Irish & Welsh folklore, and Latin reads more Roman to me? but maybe I'm uninformed & I might do more research into this after I've finished the whole series so i don't spoil myself.

okay. post done! again please don't spoil for future books.

[cabeswaterdrowned]

assigned each TTPD track to trc/td3 chars/pairings because I was bored.  

Main Tracks

•Fortnight — post TDT & BLLB era Bluesey. not every lyric fits perfectly but the tone/overall subject (requited but forbidden love, especially the implication it’s both literally forbidden (other people involved/kiss curse) and self imposed forbidden (they’re from two different worlds and need to bridge that gap) is so them, pining and yearning, Literally “we can pretend this once then never speak of it again” and then mourning that as they try and keep their distance, also the “your wife waters flowers I want to kill her” bit in my head is Blue being jealous of Henry when she meets him. It makes sense. To me. Primarily a Blue pov song and then the Post Malone bits can be Gansey. 

•The Tortured Poets Department — The Gray Man x Maura, The Gray Man’s post TDT break up anthem. When you give up your hit man life for a woman and she runs off to a cave to find her ex boyfriend, a tree! Will really mess up an Anglo Saxon Poetry lover.

•My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys — DC Party Adansey from both their povs, Adam fearing Gansey only can value him as a possession and can’t love him in a way that Adam would want and Gansey fearing Adam secretly hates him + his heart breaking when Adam smashes the figurines. But the bridge is very Adam pov “I felt more when we played pretend than with all the Kens” Adam’s relationship with projection and both hating Gansey’s facade and being infatuated with and attracted to it, also there are so many ways they pretend seperately and together. 

•Down Bad — Pynch, first verse and chorus definitely Ronan pov in trc, the second verse and chorus as Adam pov in mi then after that could be both of them although still would lean more Ronan pov for the vibes. 

•So Long, London — Noah song. A lot of it could be his pov talking to Whelk, but then the friends he’s referring to could be the Gangsey and the Gangsey pov could be the final chorus saying goodbye to him. 

•But Daddy I Love Him — Niall x Mor. Niall’s pov as he tries to get his mother/his family to accept that he loves Mor. 

•Fresh Out The Slammer — Jordeclan. Self explanatory. 

•Florida!!! — at first I was going to give this one to Blue because of some of the themes about feeling conflicted about your hometown, then I wanted to make it a Hennessy song because some lyrics really fit her, but then eventually I decided this is actually a song about The Fairy Market. Different parts could be from Hennessy Jordan and Declan’s pov and maybe a little bit from Mor’s and/or Henry’s. 

•Guilty as Sin? — this song has both Bluesey and Pynch vibes but to me it’s a Bluesey song overall. Blue pov, yearning for someone you can never touch it’s perfect… 

•Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me? — Ronan song fits him in the first two trc books real well imo. In the second verse he’s addressing the Gray Man but he could be addressing a number of people from Declan to Kavinsky to Niall to Gansey throughout the song. 

•I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) — Maura Sargent and her terrible taste in men! First verse and chorus about Artemus and Calla and Persephone shaking their heads in the background, then the second time with The Gray Man Calla again shaking her head. 

•loml — Jordeclan, but specifically a Jordan pov song after Declan chooses death by fairy market over her could either say this is her thought process in a middle bit that we didn’t get to see or an au where Declan did die and/or she did leave him for a bit after this.

•I Can Do It With A Broken Heart — Adam song. I think you could read it as in the first verse / go of the chorus the “him” being referred to is Gansey post DC but then in the second verse/chorus it’s Ronan in mister impossible era. His whole thing with masking/not paying attention to his feelings through both series and literally “faking it to make it” at Harvard… I can pass this test… the tonally upbeat music and devastating lyrics. Soo him. 

•The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived — Rovinsky break up song. I think the first verse and chorus is K pov but the rest of the song is Ronan’s pov. 

•The Alchemy — another song with both Pynch and Bluesey vibes but this one I’m giving to Pynch overall. The whole high school relationship currently long distance but I’ll always come back to you thing. 

•Clara Bow — for a minute I thought I really would have to give up on making this one about trc, but then I thought about the whole theme of women mirroring each other Blue and Gwenllian and the tapestry of girls with Blue’s face, their literal mirror powers, the 300 fox way women and how you see something of all of them in Blue / she’s a product of them, Hennessy and her clones, Mor and Aurora. So yeah general vibes of that theme. 

Bonus Tracks 

•The Black Dog — Pynch divorce bop. Adam pov. 

• imgonnagetyouback — Bluedam, now you may be thinking that I’m just assigning this one because I already think get him back! by Olivia Rodrigo is a Bluedam song (see previous web weaving) and this song is just a worse version of that song, and you’d be right that’s why I’m saying it. 

•The Albatross — Bluesey. Gansey associating the color blue with death, learning Blue is his death, being fascinated by her and falling for her more and more the more he accepts his own death… 

• Chloe or Sam or Sofia or Marcus — this is all about romantic drama/a love square between Blue Henry Gansey and Adam, different parts of it are from Gansey or Adam’s pov primarily about each other but they refer to Henry or Blue at different points. The Adansey divorce to Sarchengsey to Chengsey divorce pipeline song essentially. 

• How Did It End? — Adansey!! literally “he was a hothouse flower to my outdoorsmen, our melodies were such we could not cure them” I won’t just go through every lyric but every lyric just screams Adanseycore, as many of her songs about divorce do. 

•So High School — Pynch. “You know how to ball I know Aristotle” referring to Ronan playing tennis is an especially fun aspect. 

• I Hate it Here — Adam, first verse and chorus could be DC party Adam and then as it goes on it’s Adam at Harvard thinking all the things he won’t say to the crying club, and then it’s Adam about Henrietta. 

•thanK you alMee — Declan song centered on his conflicted grief/hatred of Niall. 

 •I Look in People’s Windows — Adam observing the wealthy/people he envies. 

•The Prophecy — Blue song. Elements of Bluesey obviously but mostly about Blue who won’t let fate define her and is brave when she’s afraid, begging for a different fate for Maura when she’s missing for Gansey and Noah, for herself when she wants things from the future that seem impossible for so many reasons. “And I look unstable gathered with a coven around a sorceress table” so the bath tub scene with her and her mom and Aunts! 

•Cassandra — Gwenllian Glendower anthem! 

•Peter — Adam pov Adansey song 😭 I already made a web weaving explaining this and if I tried to again with words I’d throw up and die, but this is the most trc coded song on the album other than the prophecy. 

•The Bolter — Hennessy song. First verse refers to her childhood trauma, The chorus fits Jordanessy and their mi scene with the cars so well and the whole repeatedly dying thing is obviously very Mister Impossible plot coded and also the cyclical nature of her lace dreams are reflected here. 

•Robin — Adansey. “way to go tiger”. 

•The Manuscript — Blue x Henry pining era song post Sarchengsey divorce. 

[blue-lantern]

Thinking about the differences in interacting with your culture as a means of interacting with your family vs interacting with your culture as a means of interacting with a broader community. Thinking about Kyle’s complicated but loving relationship with his mother and stolen relationship with his father. Thinking about both his Mexican and his Irish heritage existing as connections to his parents without much consideration to a broader community.

I can’t find this panel again anywhere so I’m starting to think I may have made it up, but I swear there’s a panel out there of Maura trying to get Kyle to say something in Gaelic and him trying to brush her off. It’s a light scene, really not very consequential. But it makes it feel like it’s a culture he was presumably brought up in but maybe not one he really actively partakes in beyond some smaller stuff. Similarly to his ultimately loving relationship with his mother that he spends a lot of his early runs distancing from the rest of his life for one reason or another. He didn’t even know he was Mexican growing up, that part of himself comes as suddenly as the knowledge that Gabriel wasn’t a dead beat and loved him and his mother so dearly. The culture is his, but new to him, maybe a little foreboding and overwhelming in the same way meeting his father would be.

For Kyle it does feel like his heritage and his identity exist primarily as extensions of his relationships with his parents a lot of the time.

[misfitwashere]

Fascism and Fear

The Moment, The Media, The Election

Timothy Snyder

Jul 07, 2024

Mainstream media have treated President Biden with prejudice and arrogance. Quite a few Democrats, reacting to this, treat any mention of President Biden’s fitness as disloyalty. This is mistaken, if understandable.

One source of the negative energy is Trump’s fascism. Focusing on it will not answer the question of what Democrats do, but will help us to understand the context in which the discussion is taking place. By fascism I just have in mind (1) the cult of personality of a Leader: (2) the party that becomes a single party; (3) the threat and use of violence; and (4) the big lie that must be accepted and used to reshape reality: in this case, that Trump can never lose an election.

Much more could be said (as I have done elsewhere), but it is the official big lie and the threats of violence that are dangerous to those whose job is to report truth. Trump is on the record as regarding reports as enemies of the people. What should I make — a journalist might ask — of Trump’s talk of arresting journalists? When not confronted, such questions become self-realizing fears.

That’s the subtle version. Meanwhile, those higher up in corporations might like the ratings Trump brings, or like Trump himself. And so it is easiest to keep things personal — give Trump time, on the self-deluding logic that he will discredit himself, and focus on Biden’s age rather than his achievements. For reporters it can feel like the work is being done when only Biden is at the receiving end of criticism — whereas, in fact, the ground has been shifted by fascism, or by the inability to confront it.

And so fascism spreads and settles in our minds during this, the crucial period between Trump’s first coup attempt and his second. The Biden administration is being held to standards, while the previous Trump administration is not; and Biden personally is being held to standards, while Trump as a person is not. This helps to generate a fascist aura. There must be something special about Trump such that he is different from others: a Leader beyond criticism rather than just an indebted hack or a felon from Queens or a client of a Russian dictator.

It should seem odd that media calls to step down were not first directed to Trump. If we are calling for Biden to step aside because someone must stop Trump from bringing down the republic, then surely it would have made more sense to first call for Trump to step aside? (The Philadelphia Inquirer did). I know the counter-arguments: his people wouldn’t have cared, and he wouldn’t have listened. The first misses an important point. There are quite a few Americans who have not made up their minds. The second amounts to obeying in advance. If you accept that a fascist is beyond your reach, you have normalized your submission.

When media folks describe discussions among Democrats as chaos and disarray, they are implicitly suggesting that it is better for a leader of a party to never be questioned. (Why, after all, is being part of an array a good thing?) An obvious point goes missed: Democrats can say what they want, because none of them is afraid. And that is good! Governor Maura Healey can express her dissent and Joe Biden can express his frustration with her — but no one is worried about her physical safety.

Trump, by contrast, controls his party through stochastic terror, threats issued through social media that his cult followers can be expected to realize. Republicans leave politics because they fear for themselves and their families. Those who remain all obey in advance. That is new, and it should not be normal, and it should not spread any further. But it becomes normal when we treat discussions, and not coercion, as abnormal.

If I am right that much of the energy behind the Biden pile-on is displaced fear of a regime change, much of the media will continue to generate fascist froth for Trump, whether or not Biden is the Democratic nominee — unless, of course, journalists confront their fears, and keep the issue of regime change inside the story, and provide a constructive alternative alongside personal criticism.

There are three tests of good faith for those who are proposing that President Biden step down. The first is recognition that Biden’s first term has been one of extraordinary achievement. The second is a plan for what the Democrats would do, should Biden withdraw, to select a nominee and win the election. The third is recognition that the threat of regime change is what might justify changing the nominee.

I don’t want to dodge the issue of President Biden’s candidacy — I will have something to say about that. But I found I could only enter the discussion after saying a word about how it has been warped — by fascism and fear.