#mates and bonds
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The whole werewolves stories I've been reading resulted in this thought because I don't understand how some mates are abusive and they are all like 'Goddess this or that why, but I also love him'.
This is Copium and in the form of DamiRae.
Warning: Bad words.
The Moon Goddess.
The Goddess of the People of the Night. Believed to be the one who connects everyone to their mates, be it wolves, vampires, witches and humans.
And when someone so unfortunately gains a mate who is unworthy, abusive, hurtful-- they blame her.
'Why was I bound to this kind of person?' They would ask.
But because of the bond, and their blind trust to The Moon Goddess, ultimately these people bound to a cruel mate, would say, 'But I love them, and there must be a reason for this connection.'
It was laughable.
How they got it so wrong.
These fated bonds they held sacredly, were not created by The Moon Goddess.
It was created by a witch who wanted to be connected with her lover in this life and the next, and the next, and the next, well, till eternity.
And she ascended to Godhood to do so. For nothing could stop her from being with her lover. And he will always have a place right next to her.
Those who heard of what she had done and wanted the same fate with their lovers, sought her out. Not thinking that their partner won't be the same in the next life.
So, if you so happen to have an abusive mate. Don't blame The Moon Goddess or The Witch.
Blame yourself.
Because in some other life, this was what you wanted.
In a cold dark throne room, sat a man with black hair on a golden throne. His eyes were closed. His head propped up by one hand with his elbow resting on the armchair.
Everything was quiet.
The soft tapping of shoes echoed throughout the hall and the man's green eyes were revealed as he steadily gazed before him.
A pale woman in a long black dress that left no questions as to what her figure might be underneath, emerged from the shadows and as she got closer her long black hair was revealed and her mesmerising violet eyes that were locked at him.
He smiled.
And she smiled back.
There was nothing but silence as she moved towards him. The allure of her swaying hips caught his attention.
She lifted her dress revealing her beautiful ankles and her strappy heels as she ascended the small staircase to reach the man on his throne.
Their eyes still locked at one another.
He spread his legs apart as he adjusted himself on his seat, placing both arms on the armrest. And without pausing she slipped comfortably on top of one of his legs, sitting rather comfortably there.
"Damian, My Love..." She traced his angular jaw with her long wispy fingers. Her nails were long too and painted black.
He had closed his eyes to relish in her touch, "Yes, Beloved?"
"Do you not regret what I have done?" She inquired quietly as she studied his face with her eyes.
The air was calm as he replied, "Of course not."
She tilted his face towards her and she leaned down and kissed him.
"Why would I?" He mumbled between kisses as he too reciprocated her affections.
"My Lady, there is someone seeking your service." Came the voice of a man as he knelt on the floor. He appeared suddenly within a whirl of black smoke and the woman sighed.
"I think we need to make the quest to search for The Witch harder, My Love." She mumbled against his lips. And he studied her eyes.
"I honestly thought it was hard enough already, but I will see to it then, Beloved." He caressed her face and she closed her eyes for a moment. It was her turn to enjoy his touch.
After a few seconds she kissed him on the lips and pulled away. "I must go." Her hand still held his hand as she slowly distanced herself from him, clearly not wanting to let go.
Eventually their hands parted. And she turned her attention fully to the steps as she started her descent.
On the base of the staircase he called her, "Raven," she turned to him, "I will be waiting here."
She smiled and she glanced at the man, "Lead the way."
In the beginning of her journey to bind one person to another.
Her lover and her were the first. And now there were so many more connections she binded after that it came to the point that everyone believed they had some fated mate somewhere as per The Moon Goddess kind graces.
With that, The Witch and Her Lover decided to create a quest in order to find her. And they only made it harder and harder when they found more and more people were still seeking her out.
Seeking The Witch’s Unending Blessing.
The man seemed to have fallen asleep on his seat, his eyes closed and rested on one hand that was propped at the arm of his throne. His legs spread wide and he was slouched back into the back of his golden throne.
The familiar tapping of heels woke him up. His green eyes studied the darkness.
"How was it, Beloved?" He asked quietly.
And she emerged from the darkness again, a sad smile on her lips as she approached him.
He waited for her and was patient. She climbed the steps again and went to him, she sat on the throne, making her lover bring his legs closer together. Her back rested against one of the arms of the throne. And then she raised her legs to sling them over his firm legs.
She traced his face again with her long fingers, "A woman and man came to me, asking to be binded…"
He waited for her to continue, knowing that there was more she had to say.
She sighed, "She already had 4 other connections." Her violet eyes then glanced at the ceiling behind his shoulder.
"And…" He glanced back at her with a small tilting down of his chin.
"Who am I to say no to their request?" She looked at his calm green eyes, "I will not take their choice from them like those people did to us." She brushed his lower lips with her thumb.
“After all, they also proved their love by coming all the way here, through all the hardships we have built to find me.” She paused. "I think she found me quickly because she has already found me before." She replied matter of factly and the two were left to stare at one another.
And that was another reason as to why they tried to fade into history like some folklore or legend because of people seeking her out. Particularly those seeking her out a second or third or nth time.
Raven The Witch. Would never turn them down.
"Did you tell her she already had a forged bond?" He asked but he knew the answer already.
She shook her head, "No, I have no right to intervene in their decisions when they put in so much effort to find The Witch from whatever urban legend that they heard me from." She traced his jawline again, appearing to be fascinated by his angular jaw and the feeling of his already prickling beard even though he had just shaved.
"I simply fill in their desire." She studied his face and the love she had for this man seeped out from every pore of her body.
And he glowed matching her affections.
Even though she said that, the main purpose of making her story a legend that would hopefully fade to nothing was because she didn't want to meet more people like the one she had recently created a bond for.
Eventually, some bonds would fade if not reignited and would die down, but it takes a long long time for it to die. And the most recent connection would stay. But some did not have that with their older connections. The possibility of a bond to fade.
And if those already bonded kept seeking her out to form new bonds to their current lovers– it will only be a messy story for those involved
And Raven knew messy stories very well. For her life was the same.
One whole cluster fuck of a mess.
So, remember, if your mate happens to be an asshole. Blame yourself. You placed your fate in another person’s hands. Thinking that you will always have the same kind of love in this life and in the next.
Forming bonds thinking this is that once in a lifetime chance to have such an epic romance.
Well, jokes on you, even more so when you forge more than one bond in the name of such an epic love.
At the very least, if you get rejected by your mate and because you have more than one bond, then you have options.
Mortals are really foolish.
FIN.
#damirae#damian wayne#raven#demonbirds#damirae week 2023#gods au#witch#gods and goddesses#romance#legend#origin story#teen titans#dc comics#mates and bonds#soulmates#short idea#eleanore delphinium#rachel roth#raven roth#robrae
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Rewatching the 2009 movie and couldn’t get this idea out of my head
Rip Gaila I HAVE JUST BEEN INFORMED SHE SURVIVES IN YHE AOS COMICS!! YIPPIE
#Gaila is so cute to me#I know he only got with her to hack the Kobayashi Maru#but we’re pointedly ignoring that#I have a spirk fic idea where they went from fwbs to good friends#did you know Vulcans are immune to Orion pheromones?#did you Also know that whoever shares a telepathic mating bond with a Vulcan is also immune?😏#my art#james t kirk#gaila#star trek aos#kelvin timeline#james kirk#star trek fanart#kirk fanart
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My World
Day 1: Cool quiet.
Summary: Y/n's in labour. Azriel needs to stay calm.
•○●⛦●○•
Word Count: 805
Warnings: labour ig? azzie being scared and sad cus yn is in pain :(
A/n: HAPPY DAY 1 OF @azrielappreciationweek YALL WOOHOOOO 🥳
all fics in the week will be like a series cus theyre all revolving around azzie and his daughter hehe but it isnt a series ig?
ANYWAY ENJOYYYY 🥳
°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°
Rhysand did not see the shift in his spymaster. Did not see the way he stiffened, the way his eyes went distant before focusing again, fist clenched.
He said no words, nothing to indicate he knew his mate was going into labour. And if the meeting with Keir had not ended when it had and Azriel hadn’t immediately winnowed away without preamble, Rhys wouldn’t have even known.
Even when Rhysand and Cassian followed their brother to his house on the outskirts of Velaris, welcomed by agonising screams of Azriel’s mate, Rhysand saw him stand quietly in the hallway.
Rhysand could not fathom being that cool, that quiet if he knew Feyre was in labour.
He had to give it to Azriel, the male was great at hiding his weaknesses. And Rhysand would have been convinced he was still composed had he not seen that in the dark corridor, light glinted off of the tears rolling down his cheeks.
Azriel still did not move, standing still against the wall with his hands folded behind his back.
It shook Rhys more than him pacing and losing his mind would have.
°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°
Azriel’s pov.
He wanted to scream, he wanted to curse himself out loud. After all, he was the reason his darling mate was going through the pain of birth.
Should’ve resisted when she said she wanted kids.
But alas, it was now too late to do anything but stand here helpless as he heard her loud cries of pain from their bedroom.
"I- Azriel! Az-"
It took all Azriel had in him to stand outside while his mate, his wife went through unbearable pain he knew he could not even fathom of. Having your privates stretched while you had to push out a literal being was something he knew his worst wounds would look like paper cuts in comparison.
It made him respect females more at the moment.
Through the bond, he felt flashes of hot agony and cold pain, but he was aware it was nothing, nothing compared to what his mate was going through.
The door opened the slightest bit, the worried eyes of an apprentice healer peeking out. "Spymaster? Madja said you can come in to soothe your mate."
Instantly, Azriel was hurrying inside the room, his eyes finding his mate lying on the bed.
Keep calm. Keep calm. Keep calm.
But how could he, seeing as the one person he could ruin the world for, was sobbing, tears running down her face in constant streams, aided by the sweat gathering on her skin?
He hurried over to her side, her palm instantly finding his.
"My love, I’m here."
She gasped in pain, nails digging into his palm.
Cool. Stay cool. It will be fine.
"Just one more push dear, then you can rest."
Azriel turned his head to Madja when she said that, relief spreading through his veins. At least the torture Y/n was going through would be over soon.
Y/n nodded, meeting Azriel’s eyes. Even while she was pushing out their baby, she found it in herself to offer him a weak smile.
Be calm.
Not even a moment after Y/n dropped back down on the bed with an exhausted sigh, loud cries filled the room. Azriel leaned down, placing his forehead against his mate’s. She smiled up at him, her eyes tired.
"No more babies. Y/n, I’m telling you, I cannot see you in pain."
Y/n had the audacity to pout. "But what if our baby gets lonely?"
He shook his head, kissing Y/n’s cheek. "I won’t let them get lonely."
He straightened when he heard footsteps approaching, lifting his head to look at Madja, who grinned at them over the baby’s head. "It’s a daughter."
Tears gathered in Azriel’s eyes as Madja leaned down, his daughter’s face coming into view for the first time. Azriel could not look away.
She’s beautiful.
Her eyes are so pretty.
She stared back at him with wide eyes.
Don’t cry. Stay calm. Stay quiet.
Fuck calm. Fuck quiet.
He let the tears fall as Y/n placed a hand on his arm, telling him to take his daughter. And even though he did not want to taint the pure soul made of him and his beloved, he extended his arms. Y/n had had the time of months to scold and train Azriel to not be scared of his own child.
The moment Madja stepped out of their room, Azriel let out an involuntary sob, accompanied by a look in his mate’s direction, who was crying too.
"I love her so much."
She nodded, giggling. "Me too." After a pause, she continued. "Hazel. That’s what we decided."
He nodded, unable to look away as he leaned down to press his lips to her tiny forehead.
"My world."
°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°
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the 1
Elriel, Azriel x Archeron!Reader
Alternate Endings: Gone | betty | The Prophecy
mini-series masterlist | ACOTAR x reader masterlist
Story Summary: All you had ever wanted to be was plain. And now, as a plain-faced High Fae, you want more. You want your mate.
Warnings: mentions of self-harm, self-loathing, suicide
Words: ~2.6k
Author's Note: I'm sorry. (I told you guys I've been having a rough week...) Apparently my brain is saying 'fuck Kinktober!' Even tho like. I WANT to write those... smut just doesn't feel in the cards for me today 😩 so have some tasty tasty angst instead. (I'm also watching an Eras Tour live so I'm hella cheered up now lol)
18+ only pls
🤍💙🩷💙🤍
Self loathing grew in your gut as you watched your family around you.
All of them were happy, reveling in the togetherness that they shared.
And your mate- your mate- was ignoring you. He was speaking to one of your sisters, absolutely enamored with her. And you couldn’t blame him.
Elain had always been the pretty one of the four of you, a shining diamond even in the filth of poverty.
Nesta was the one with regal beauty, her sharp eyes and the way she carried herself not letting anyone think otherwise.
Your twin, Feyre, was stunning, even if she herself had never seen it, the cleverness in her eyes and quiet grace drawing people’s gaze to her.
And then there was you.
You were… the ugly one. Your mother had said so, even though you were only a child when she passed. Your father had quietly agreed with her. Nesta had mocked your looks when she had had a bad day, which was nearly every day while you had been living in the run down hut after your family lost their fortune. Elain said nothing, but shot pitying looks at you when no suitor asked for a dance while you had still been human, even when it had been a ball thrown in your honor for your birthday. Feyre has been the kindest to you, reminding you that it’s what on the inside that counts…
But that didn’t appear to be so.
Even with a mating bond that you knew should draw Azriel’s attention, his eyes were still glued to Elain. He seemed to be able to breathe only when in her presence, taking in the same air as her.
And in your presence? He couldn’t seem to get away fast enough.
Being dumped into the Cauldron had made both of your sisters even prettier, and Feyre was no exception either after being turned High Fae.
For you, it had made you plain. No longer ugly, unless you counted the still crooked teeth and too small nose and thin mouth.
Just plain.
As a human, you had begged to whatever higher power there was that you could just be plain.
But now that you were, you knew it would never be enough.
Because while Feyre was right, your personality mattered more in a long term relationship than your looks, being pretty drew people in.
Being plain only made you fade into the background.
Azriel laughed at something Elain had said, the sound sending warmth through your body.
It should be you making him laugh, not Elain.
Elain, with her beauty and poise and perfect personality and her ridiculously handsome mate who wanted nothing but her time.
Elain, who seemed to want no one and no thing but your mate.
Your Azriel.
You tore your gaze away from the couple, who you already knew were in a relationship. Elain had confessed it to you a month ago, gushing about how their fifth date had gone and how she thought he was the one. She had told you first, knowing that you wouldn’t tell anyone.
After all, who would you tell?
It’s not like you had any friends in Velaris- or in the human lands, for that matter- and your other two sisters were so preoccupied with their mates and growing personal circles that they hardly had the time to look at you, let alone talk to you.
No. You were alone. You were a lockbox for all of her secrets.
Including that she was planning to officially reject the mating bond once Azriel offered a proposal of marriage.
That had made you sick to your stomach, but you had hidden it deep, deep down in your heart as you congratulated her and faked happiness, asking her when she thought he would propose.
“Any day now, I suspect. Azriel told me that he was planning for the future, and wanted to know if I would like to be a part of it,” she had sighed dreamily. “We just need to tell the family, I know that… Rhys was worried about what us being together would mean for court relations. But he’s just being dramatic, don’t you think?” Her chocolate eyes landed on you, so filled with hope that you couldn’t tell her that he was your mate.
“Yes, he’s just worried, ‘Lain. I’m sure everything will be fine,” you managed to say, and relatively normal at that.
That was last night, and while your eyes had drifted to the carpeting, they shot back upwards at the sound of clinking metal on glass.
Your mate, standing with a flute of sparkling wine in his hand and a knife in his other, had his arm locked with Elain’s.
He cleared his throat once he had everyone’s attention, his eyes passing over everyone-
But you. His eyes skipped over you, even now, with the bond flaring in your chest.
“Elain and I have something to announce, though Rhys already knows what it is.” You heard a hand slap against an arm, Rhys’s faked moan of pain, and Nesta scolding her mate. Azriel smiled at their antics, such a rarity on his face that your heart skipped several beats, leaving you lightheaded.
It most certainly wasn’t because of what they were announcing.
“Elain and I have been dating for the past two months, and we would like to make it official with you all now. In fact, the two of us will be moving into a cottage in town later in the month, and we would like to invite you all to join us for a housewarming party in two weeks.”
The inner circle broke into cheers around you, Cassian immediately encasing his brother in his arms and clapping him on the back.
“Congratulations, brother! I know you’ve waited a long time to find love.”
You remained seated where you were, offering a smile to the happy couple but staying put.
If you stood, you were sure to faint. Or be sick. Or both.
Nesta was the only other person who remained where they were, a skeptical look on her face.
“I hate to be the person to bring the party down…” She started, her voice weary. “But what of your mates? Haven’t you wanted one for your whole life, Azriel? What will happen when you find her?”
“If I find her, I will reject the bond, Nesta. My love for Elain eclipses that of what I thought possible, even with a mating bond. Nothing and no one will ever compare to your sister,” Azriel answered, which seemed to be enough to have Nesta’s approval, as she stood and made her way to the couple.
“Then I’m happy for the both of you. But if you ever hurt my sister, you will deal with me,” Nesta warned, ice in her tone.
You didn’t stick around to hear what came next.
Nothing and no one will ever compare to your sister.
And of course, he was right. How could you compare to Elain?
She was beautiful, yes, but she was also a perfect match for Azriel. Kind and caring, always ready to help people, not to mention she would be a wonderful mother.
And then there was you. Plain. Boring. Nothing special.
Even the Cauldron hadn’t thought anything of you, leaving you with a High Fae body but no magic to speak of.
You couldn’t even fathom why you had been made Azriel’s mate when Elain was such a wonderful pairing to him, and had the magical abilities to match.
You stumbled your way to the town house, where you had taken up residence once Feyre and Rhys had finished the river house. Once inside you quickly made it to your room and shucked off your clothes after locking the door.
Bare, you stood before the mirror and assessed yourself. It was a habit you had picked up once your family had regained their fortune after Feyre had been stolen away.
One that brought you no comfort, but you needed to do.
Your physique was fine, you had filled out in the past year of being fae.
But there was nothing… special about you. You were medium height. Your chest was a bit smaller than average. Your legs were on the shorter side, making your torso look too long.
And your legs… they were covered in small white scars.
Another habit that you had picked up, this time after turning fae.
And tonight would be no different.
You suppose the one saving grace of being turned fae was your quick healing, letting you destroy your body without anyone knowing.
And no one ever would, seeing as your mate was on his way to being married to your sister.
A sigh left your lips as you turned to your bed, fishing the small blade you kept underneath out from below the mattress.
Tonight would be no different.
Except now you knew that even if you confessed your bond to Azriel, your heart would be torn to shreds no matter what.
🤍💙🩷💙🤍
It was two months later, during Starfall, that your world crumbled further.
You had donned a plain dress in a midnight blue, with long flowing sleeves and reaching your feet. You had opted for flats, seeing as no one would pay you enough attention to notice if you were in heels or not.
No, no one would notice you at all.
Because Azriel had a ring in his pocket.
One that you had given him advice on, to choose something Elain would love.
A glutton for punishment, that’s what you were as you gazed at the beautiful couple, clad in matching blue outfits and beaming at one another.
You had attempted to stay home that night, only for Azriel himself to personally fly you up to the House of Wind, insisting that you needed to be there for Starfall.
You knew he meant their engagement, though.
He hadn’t even glanced your way once last Starfall, so you knew it wasn’t that you would be missed by him.
Still, you stood on one of the balconies, watching them. Waiting for the moment that your life would be forever altered, never to have a great love.
Because truly, your one chance at a great love was a mating bond. You knew that no one would choose you to spend their life with, not when you were so plain and boring with nothing to draw people in, to get to know you.
They were dancing together, so wrapped up in each other that it was painful to watch.
And then your feet were moving, leading you straight to them. You met them right as the song finished, the two of them just inches apart.
It stung.
“Azriel, may I speak to you for a moment?” You asked without realizing the words had left your mouth. “Alone, please? It will just be a moment, I promise.”
You cringed at yourself.
What were you doing?
Azriel glanced down at Elain, who nodded with a smile. “Of course. I’ll be right back, sweetheart,” he said softly, placing a gentle kiss to Elain’s lips before following you back into the House, away from the commotion.
“What’s this about, Y/N?” Azriel asked in a clipped tone once you were alone, anxiously glancing back to where you had left Elain.
“I…” You hesitated, the words catching in your throat. Are you really going to tell him?
“Well?” He asked impatiently, his shadows swirling around him.
“I… I’m your mate,” you said, the words rushing out all at once, and your tore your eyes away from his face and to the floor.
“You’re… You’re joking, right?” Azriel asked incredulously.
A dagger of ice to the heart, crafted of your own yearning and longing for him, for your mate.
“No, I… It’s true, Azriel. I am your mate.” Your eyes flicked back up to his face after you said it again, but you wished you hadn’t.
Anything would be better than seeing the horror in his eyes, the disgust twisting his features.
The dagger, forced in further by a hand smacking the hilt.
“You?” Azriel laughed. “Why would the Cauldron make you my mate?”
Twisting, bleeding, shredding your soul apart even as you felt the bond flare to life on his end, the very slightest stumble as he regarded you.
“I… I don’t know…” You whispered, barely audible.
“You’re not my mate,” Azriel said, stepping away from you. “You were never going to be my mate. You’re a fine enough person, sure, but how could you compare to Elain?” He shook his head, snickering to himself. “I suppose these five hundred years of waiting were for nothing. I’ll tell Cassian or Rhys take you back to the town house. Just…” He sighed. “Don’t take it personally. It’s not you, it’s me, hmm?”
And with that, the bond between the two of you was shredded, a wounded cry leaving your lips as you sank to the ground, clutching your chest where it used to reside, glowing brightly and giving you a reason to go on.
“I think it’s best for you to stay away from Elain and I. I wouldn’t want you getting territorial and ripping my love’s throat out of anything. Goodbye, Y/N.”
You barely heard him walk away, so overwhelmed with pain.
Why me?
Why was I his mate?
Why didn’t I just drown in the Cauldron?
With a great deal of trying, you managed to hoist yourself back onto your feet, stumbling your way to one of the unoccupied balconies, still clutching your chest.
Your gaping, empty chest.
Because Azriel still had your heart. He had shredded it, mangled it beyond believe but it still resided with him, leaving you with nothing but a hole where it used to be.
Your legs crashed into the edge of the balcony, your hands flying to the stone to steady you.
But it didn’t help, everything was still spinning, blood rushing in your ears as your heart kept beating somehow, somehow still physically intact even as you felt it was being ripped from your chest over and over and over.
You couldn’t breathe.
You couldn’t live.
The very fact that Elain was so casual, so blasé about shredding a bond to bits had you questioning everything you thought you knew about your sister.
How could she condemn someone to this existence?
Because already, you weren’t living.
This couldn’t be living.
It couldn’t be.
You risked a peak over the edge, spying the sharp, jagged rocks below.
If you weren’t living now…
Before you could second guess your choice, you lifted yourself onto the balcony, letting your legs dangle for a moment.
Then you swung them over the stone, to the side that had nothing to catch you.
Well, nothing but the cold embrace of death.
Which at this point would be a welcome reprieve from the fiery hot grief flooding through you, grief at the bond that was never given a chance, a moment to be considered.
But perhaps that was all the consideration you needed. To know that you would only have been a burden of mate to the male you had fallen for.
You took one last, jagged breath into your lungs before you slid off the smooth stone, air rushing past you and-
This must be what it feels like to fly.
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@sjmvillainweek Day 3 - Secret Skills
Beron's secret skill is having the best comebacks at the High Lord meeting.
If you ever get the chance to listen to this scene in graphic audio, I recommend. The way Eris delivers his reaction makes me chuckle every time.
#my art#acotar#acotar fanart#beron vanserra#eris vanserra#sjmvillainweek#sjmvillainweek2024#as a beron enjoyer this was the moment our mating bond snapped#love me a man who's mean to rhys
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Shattered Bonds
A/N: I'm back after a very much long needed break! Between starting a new job and graduating, things have been super hectic. So, why not come back with an angsty fanfic with Azriel? I also may or may not be working on the long-awaited part 2 of 'Exile'.
Paring: Azriel x fem!Reader
Word count: 3.2k
Summary: After being injured in battle, Azriel is consumed by guilt. But when you finally wake, you're confronted with the harsh reality that perhaps you were always replaceable.
Warnings: Violence, Language, hurt no comfort, Azriel lowkey is a dick, Injured Reader, Angst, Duel(ish) POV, Mentions of pregnancy
Death and smoke fill your lungs. A sticky substance clings to your skin, though at this point, you're unsure if it’s yours or someone else’s. Metal clashes against metal, and your hands sting from both the vibration and the rawness caused by gripping the sword's hilt. You pivot on your foot, turning quickly to keep up with your opponent, your blades moving at lightning speed. Then, you feel a foot slam into your stomach, sending you flying backward across the rough brick ground. The surface tears into your skin like tiny knives, shredding your clothes in the process.
You scramble to your feet, your eyes darting around for your attacker. Instead, they land on a blue glow and dark hair. Azriel. But before you can process this, a sharp pain stabs your side. Gasping, you turn and plunge your sword into your attacker, your eyes blazing with fury. You lock onto the wide eyes of your victim just as another sharp pain strikes your stomach. Looking down, you see something silver protruding from your abdomen.
Green wisps shoot out from you, your lip curling as blood dribbles from the corner of your mouth. You drive the sword deeper into him as he begins to gag, foam forming at the edges of his mouth. You watch as he collapses to the ground, clawing at his neck before eventually falling still. Staggering back, you wince at the ever-growing burn in your abdomen, the green wisps swirling as if seeking something.
You fall back against the crumbling building behind you, sliding down the wall as you tilt your head back, feeling the weight of your exhaustion. Your vision blurs, your mind hazy, as you clutch your stomach, finding it harder and harder to keep your eyes open. A red glow catches your attention, and someone sprints toward you, dropping to their knees, unsure hands hovering over your wound.
“Cassian?” Your voice is frail, barely a whisper. If your mother could hear you now, she’d be laughing in pure disappointment.
Cassian smiles down at you and gently brushes the hair from your face. “Hey there, Bug. Hang on for me, alright? Azriel is coming.” You smile at the nickname he gave you when you were younger, back when you had an obsession with ladybugs.
Nodding, you close your eyes and lean into him. “It hurts, Cass,” you mumble, wincing as you shift, trying to find some comfort.
“I know, I know. But you did such a good job,” he whispers, combing your hair back before pressing his hands firmly against your wound to stem the bleeding.
The world around you seems to darken, and you glance up to meet the eyes of your mate. Smiling weakly, you reach out to him. “Hey, Az,” you whisper as your eyes flutter closed. His horrified expression tells you everything—the wound isn’t something that can be easily fixed. In other words, it’s a "you might die" kind of wound. Joy.
Azriel looked pale, and you didn’t miss the way his eyes widened. He gently pulls you toward him, holding you close as his thumb strokes softly across your cheek. His gaze darts around frantically before locking onto Cassian.
“We need to get her back. She’s not going to survive. Let Rhys and the others know,” he says, urgency clear in his voice.
Leaning into him, you feel the comforting embrace of his shadows surrounding you. Your eyes grow heavy, and before long, sleep overtakes you.
Azriel paced around the room as you lay motionless in the bed. Every glance at you gnawed at his heart, guilt consuming him. His shadows hadn't left your side, hovering as if trying to heal you somehow. His pacing came to an abrupt stop when his brothers and Madja entered the room. Azriel didn’t miss the more somber expressions they wore, and even Madja's eyes seemed duller than before.
He turned to them, desperation shining in his gaze. “Well? What did Madja say?” he asked, his voice tight with anxiety. Cassian and Rhysand exchanged a look, as if communicating silently. Cassian nodded, then pursed his lips before facing Azriel.
“Well, there’s a chance Y/N could make it,” Cassian said gently.
Azriel felt as though his ears were ringing. A chance. Just a chance that you might wake up and survive. It wasn't a guarantee, only a possibility. His frustration boiled over. “What the hell is that supposed to mean? Can’t we do something to wake her? If not, why did we even bring her back?” he spat, his shadows retracting toward him, draping over his shoulders like a dark cape.
Madja shook her head as she finished changing the dressing on your wounds. “We’ve done all we can, boy. It's her fight now. I suggest you stay here—if she wakes, the first thing she’ll want is her mate,” Madja said, placing a firm hand on his shoulder. “You need to be there for her, as she has been for you countless times.”
With that, she nodded to the brothers and quietly left the room, the door clicking softly behind her.
Azriel clenched and unclenched his fists, glaring at the ground. Cassian, already knowing what his brother was about to say, gently gripped his shoulder. “It’s not—”
“But it is my fault," Azriel snapped. "She wanted to stay behind and protect Feyre and the others, and I convinced her to come because I couldn’t bear to be away from her for so long. She was unsure of her skills, and I talked her into it. I’m to blame for all of this. I almost got my mate killed.” He spun, his gaze shifting between his brothers and you.
Rhysand sighed, pushing off the wall he had been leaning against. “Az, Cassian’s right. You can’t blame yourself for this. Y/N was already set on coming. She talked to me about it—she was worried about you and didn’t want to leave you stranded in battle while she stayed behind.”
Azriel let out a low growl, his siphons flashing, causing Cassian to tense. “Either way, I couldn’t protect her. And now look at her—she’s fighting for her life, and I don’t know if she’ll ever wake up.” He stepped closer to you, sinking into the chair beside your bed and gently taking your hand. “Just give me some time alone. I need to think while still being here for her,” he whispered, his eyes fixed on your chest, searching for any sign of your shallow breathing.
Cassian opened his mouth to respond, but Rhysand placed a hand on his shoulder and shook his head. Silently, Cassian closed his mouth, turned on his heel, and walked out of the room, Rhysand following close behind. The door clicked shut, leaving Azriel alone in the deafening silence.
Azriel let his eyes trace over your face, as if committing every feature, every imperfection to memory. Gently, he ran his fingers through your hair and pressed his lips to the back of your hand. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I should’ve stayed by your side, like you asked. I shouldn’t have fought with you about it. You needed me, and I turned my back on you, and this is the result.”
He felt like a danger to you. Even if you survived, he believed he would only continue to put you in harm's way. You could never have a peaceful life with him. All he wanted was for you to be safe and happy, but he’d failed when it mattered most. You were his entire universe, and yet he couldn’t protect you. He had convinced himself that by staying by his side, you would never be safe—that he didn’t deserve you, not if it meant you ended up like this.
The door creaked open, and Elain poked her head in, glancing around. Stepping in, she cleared her throat softly. “Oh, Azriel, I didn’t realize you’d be here. I thought you were still with Madja and the others,” she said gently. Noticing his gaze on the moon lilies, she smiled and approached the table next to your bed. “Moon lilies. They were her favorite. For a while, I thought she was going to take over the whole garden with them. Luckily, I talked her into taking over the area by the pond. It’s beautiful with the flowers there,” Elain said, smiling down at you.
Azriel looked up at Elain, his expression unreadable. Letting go of your hand, he stood and cleared his throat. “Speaking of the flowers, I saw you loading the cart earlier. I assume you’re making rounds around Velaris to hand them out. Would you like some help?” he asked, his voice even.
Their eyes met, and Elain studied him for a moment, as if searching for the intent behind his offer. After a brief hesitation, she nodded and motioned toward the door.
You pace around the room, your leathers hugging you tightly. Nesta had spent hours wrestling with your hair, her shaky hands finally managing to braid it back. She’d have a fit if she saw the strands that had already fallen loose. Chewing on your nail, your gaze snaps to Azriel, who watches you from the bed. “I don’t know about this, Az. We still don’t know what I’m capable of. What if I hurt the wrong person?” you ask, your pacing quickening slightly.
Azriel huffs as he continues sharpening Truth-Teller. “Stop worrying so much. It’s war, Y/N. Accidents are going to happen. You can’t always prevent them. One day, you’ll have to face the reality of what you can do and accept it. I can’t always be there to shield you from the harsh truths.” His tone is sharp, and it brings you to an abrupt halt.
“I’m not asking you to shield me, Azriel. I’m asking you to be there if I lose control,” you push back, crossing your arms over your chest. Azriel tenses at the use of his full name.
Setting the dagger in his lap, he turns to face you. “And I can’t do that. My place is by Rhysand’s side, and you know that. I can’t abandon him just to keep you safe all the time. This is your chance to learn how to handle things on your own for once.”
A dry laugh escapes you, and you throw your hands up in frustration. “I never asked you to abandon him, Azriel! You were the one who insisted I come with you—especially when we don’t know what I’m capable of or that I can’t control these abilities yet. So, I’m sorry if I’m a little scared,” you say, your voice catching.
Azriel scoffs as he stands, gathering his things. “Well, I’m sure you’ll figure it out, Y/N. And if not, just don’t die. We don’t need more problems weighing down the court.” His words hit you like a blow, leaving you speechless, your mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. Taking your silence as an answer, Azriel turns his back and walks out of the room, leaving you standing there, staring at the door.
Your eyes snap open as a rush of air fills your lungs. Choking, you cough violently, feeling a hand on your back, rubbing soothing circles. Your body tenses at the unfamiliar touch, and you instinctively jerk back, putting distance between yourself and the unknown figure.
“Hey, hey, it’s me. It’s okay,” a familiar voice reassures. As your vision clears, you find yourself face to face with Cassian, his frown deepening at your reaction.
Relaxing slightly, you offer him a small smile and shift back into your original position. “Where’s Azriel?” you ask, noticing something flicker in his eyes, though you can’t quite identify the emotion. Maybe you weren’t fully awake enough to process it. Glancing around the room, you spot a few vases of dead flowers and a subtle change in the decor. Confusion clouds your face. “Cassian, how long have I been asleep?”
Cassian clears his throat, looking away as he gathers his thoughts. “It’s been about ten months,” he finally says.
It feels like a jolt of electricity surges through you. Ignoring his protests, you slide out of bed and limp toward the window. “Ten months? How—what—there’s no way,” you mutter, staring at your reflection in the glass. You turn your head from side to side, inspecting your appearance. Your face had slimmed significantly, and your eyes were slightly sunken. You still looked like yourself, but there was something off, something different. “Cassian, where is Azriel? Is he on a mission?”
Cassian sighs, running a hand over his face as he averts his gaze once again. “It’s better if I show you rather than tell you,” he mutters, glaring toward the door. “Get cleaned up, and once you’re ready, we’ll head downstairs,” he says, moving to sit on one of the couches. “I’ll wait here. Take your time.”
Nodding slowly, you turn toward the bathroom and walk in to bathe. You were somewhat clean, but it was clear they had only managed to wash the areas they could reach with a small towel. At least they had taken care of you, in some way. Stepping into the bath, you sink into the water, staring blankly at the wall. Ten months. You had been in that state for ten months, leaving your family to wait and worry.
Your thoughts drift to Azriel. Why hadn’t he been there when you woke? Why did the other end of the bond feel so empty and cold?
Sucking in a deep breath, you tug on the bond, holding it tight as you wait for a response. But when none comes, your heart clenches. Panic sets in as you hurriedly finish bathing and dressing. Throwing the door open, you face Cassian. “Has something happened to Azriel? Is he alright?”
Cassian lets out a dry snort and stands. “Yeah, something happened,” he mutters, offering you his arm. Taking it, you shoot him a confused look as the two of you walk together. “Don’t worry, you’ll find out soon enough.”
As you and Cassian descend the stairs, the sounds of laughter, clinking glasses, and silverware fill the air. A soft smile tugs at your lips as you step into the room. Mor is the first to notice you, her eyes brimming with tears as she suddenly stands and rushes toward you, pulling you into a tight embrace.
��Please don’t tell me this is a dream,” she rasps, clinging to you.
You and Mor had always been like sisters. Growing up surrounded by the boys, her arrival in your life had been a blessing.
“It’s not a dream,” you whisper, hugging her back just as tightly. But after a few moments, you feel Mor tense, as if she suddenly remembered something. She pulls away, giving you a sad smile that only deepens your confusion. As you look around the room, everyone avoids your gaze, though a palpable tension hangs in the air, laced with something like anger.
Your eyes shift between them, trying to understand, until they finally land on Azriel. He sits frozen, fork midair, eyes wide, body rigid. Next to him, Elaine quickly looks away, nervously biting her lip—a habit she had whenever she felt guilty about something.
“Azriel?” you call out, your voice trembling slightly. The sound of his name seems to snap him out of his stupor, and he drops his fork, spilling his drink onto Elaine’s lap.
Elaine stands abruptly, and your eyes widen in shock. Before you, a very pregnant Elaine rises, her hand instinctively resting on her belly. Your gaze travels downward, catching the glint of a ring on her finger. “You and Lucien finally made it official?” you ask, a smile breaking across your face. “I’m so happy for you!” You laugh, but the sound dies quickly when you notice everyone else’s glances shifting toward Azriel.
That’s when you see it—something you had somehow missed before. On his finger, where he once wore the engagement ring meant for you, sits a wedding band, one that matches Elaine’s.
A chill runs down your spine as your eyes snap back to his. The room feels suddenly colder, and you feel the ground give way beneath you.
“No…” you whisper, your vision blurring as the weight of it all crashes down on you.
The ring on your finger suddenly felt like it was searing into your skin, and you blinked rapidly, trying to stop the tears from falling. "This is a joke, right? Some sick prank you both decided to pull?" When silence met your words, the rage inside you began to swell, and your breathing quickened. "So you’re telling me that while I was fighting for my life, you were out here screwing Elain, and somewhere along the way, you got married—and the best part? She’s pregnant?"
Something snapped inside you, and from the corner of your eye, you saw green wisps materialize, curling around you like tendrils of raw power.
Rhysand stood abruptly, and Cassian shifted closer to Nesta, instinctively protective. “Y/N, you need to breathe. I understand you're angry, but this isn’t the place to test your abilities after being asleep for ten months,” Rhysand said, trying to calm you.
You shook your head, fists clenched. “You want me to calm down? My supposed mate left me to rot in that room, just so he could chase after Elain. He abandoned me and every promise he made! I didn’t ask to be in that room—I didn’t ask to get hurt. So why should I bow down to your request when the real traitor is right here in front of all of you!”
With a final burst of fury, a smoky green tendril shot out, aimed directly at Azriel and Elain. His shadows barely blocked the blow. Elain screamed, curling in on herself to protect her stomach, while Azriel staggered back, overwhelmed by the torrent of emotions surging through the bond. The betrayal, the hurt, the rage—all of it hit him like a wave, causing him to drop to his knees, gasping for breath.
You stepped closer, looming over him, and pulled the ring from your finger, letting it fall to the ground in front of him. Azriel picked it up without hesitation, his eyes wide with guilt.
"Don’t look at me like that, Azriel. It makes you look pathetic," you spat. "You chose this the moment you left me in that room to chase after Elain. After 200 years together, I was never going to compare to her, even as your mate. You’ve made it clear, Azriel—I’m replaceable."
You took a step back, but Azriel’s hand shot out, catching yours in desperation. “Y/N, you don’t understand—you can’t do this. Please don’t leave me,” he pleaded, his voice broken, his face twisted with regret.
Seeing him on his knees, begging—it made you feel sick.
You pulled your hand away, standing tall as the green tendrils swirled and coiled around you, making you seem larger than life. "I can, because you left me to die the moment you chose Elain over me. You made your bed, Azriel—now lie in it. Don’t bother looking for me, because if you do, I’ll do everything in my power to destroy you."
With those final words, you turned and walked out, leaving behind your family, your home, and every happy memory you once held dear. All that was left was anger and a thirst for vengeance.
A/N: I do hope you guys enjoyed! It may not be the best after a long time away, but I figured it was a great way to finally make my comeback after so long!
#acotar#azriel x reader#azriel acotar#azriel spymaster#azriel shadowsinger#shadowsinger x reader#acotar fanfiction#feyre archeron#rhysand#cassian#elain archeron#morrigan#mating bond#acotar fandom#acotar series#fluff#angst#reader insert#sarah j maas#a court of thorns and roses#a court of mist and fury#a court of wings and ruin#a court of silver flames#fanfiction#azriel fanfiction#azriel x you#azriel
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Azriel singing or humming while he cooks you breakfast that you don't want because of the mating frenzy is one of my favorite things to imagine. I mean, come on. Az taking care of your body AND your belly. Now that's a real man.
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I think often about how in ACOTAR Book 1, Lucien Vanserra was ready to lay down his life for this human girl, Feyre Archeron. Again and again, he stuck his neck out there for her Under the Mountain and throughout the trials. While I do think it is a reflection of his loyalty to friends, his courage against the evil of Amarantha, and his honor for doing what is right…
I also think it was because of Tamlin. Because Lucien didn’t want the one friend who took him in after his darkest day—who helped save him from his family’s wrath and gave him a Court and a home—to watch the girl he loved be butchered cruelly because of who she was in relation to those in power. He didn’t want Tamlin to experience what he did with Jesminda.
The lesser fae and the mortal girl. Everything he did was for them.
For his friend with the stone heart to not break, just as his once did.
#try not to think about how Lucien thought Jesminda was his mate but the bond hadn’t snapped#And Tamlin thought the same thing of Feyre in ACOMAF#maybe Tamlin thought this because of what Lucien had told him once#im not downplaying Lucien and Feyre’s friendship#i am just saying what Tamlin and Lucien shared transcended centuries of loyalty born in the aftermath of Lucien’s trauma#that shit is deep#anyways#Lucien Vanserra#pro lucien vanserra#pro Lucien#Tamlin#pro Tamlin#ACOTAR#feyre archeron#ACOTAR meta#i am always thinking about Lucien
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A Court of Thorns and Roses / A Court of Wings and Ruin: ..And they held on to dear life...
#artists on tumblr#digital art#acotar#acotar fanart#rhysand#feyre archeron#a court of thorns and roses#feysand#a court of wings and ruin#art#a court of mist and fury#kdii art#how I imagine their mating bond to look like#going to do Nesta and cassian tomorrow..maybe#Fantasy Hand Collection
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Artwork by sam.rosariio
For @officialfeysandweek 2024!
I was pulled from sleep by something tugging at my middle, a thread deep inside.
I left Tamlin sleeping in the bed, his body heavy with exhaustion. In a few hours, we would be leaving Under the Mountain and returning home, and I didn’t want to wake him sooner than I had to. I prayed I would ever get to sleep that peacefully again.
I knew who summoned me long before I opened the door to the hall and padded down it, stumbling and teetering every now and then as I adjusted to my new body, its new balance and rhythms. I carefully, slowly took a narrow set of stairs upward, up and up, until, to my shock, a trickle of sunlight poured into the stairwell and I found myself on a small balcony jutting out of the side of the mountain.
A Court of Thorns and Roses, Chapter 46
Sarah J. Maas
SO excited to work with the amazing Sam on this beautiful piece! I am obsessed with UTM, and how an open balcony always lets Feyre and Rhys share their feelings, and how Rhysand gave Feyre her first glimpse of the world in this scene. I will love them forever!
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Azriel in his bonus chapter💀
artists: lucien: mftfernandez | azriel: dominiquewesson
#azriel out here punching air#what is this man so pressed about#maybe he is jealous of elain because she got the mating bond with lucien and not him#I wouldn't blame him who doesn't want lucien#lucien vanserra#pro lucien vanserra#azriel#anti elriel#acotar#anti ic#anti inner circle#acotar critical#acotar memes
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Rhys: The mating bond is rare! Only if you're very lucky and blessed by the Mother, will you have one.
Rhysand's parents = Mates
Tamlin's parents = Mates
Kallias and Viviane = Mates
LoA and Helion = Possibly mates
Rhys and Feyre = Mates
Nesta and Cassian = Mates
Elain and Lucien = Mates
Me: 5 of these 7 couples/potential couples only met because they traveled out of their home court. So, are mates actually rare, or do they just seem rare because of the lack of movement and interaction between the various Courts and the human lands?
#acotar#elain archeron#lucien vanserra#azriel shadowsinger#rhysand#feyre archeron#Cassian#nesta archeron#nessian#Feysand#lady of autumn#helion spell cleaver#mating bond#prythian#sjmass
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As a slut for angst today “tolerate it” has been stuck on a loop and now I am imaging an angsty fic where Az just slowly begins to forget about reader and she threatens to leave but he doesn’t take her seriously and is so utterly destroyed when he comes back home and she’s gone…
Like I feel like it’s on brand with him and his duty to his job and whatnot. Plus the lyrics are so him coded “while you were out building worlds where was I” / “took this dagger in me and removed it” LIKE HELLO???
(But I also love a good happy ending so I feel like if azzy groveled hard enough… 👀)
Tolerate it.
Summary: She is fed up.
•○●⛦●○•
A/n: ehehehehehe angsttttt yummy yummyyyy
Enjoy!
•○🌑○•
Y/n laughed at Feyre's pathetic attempts at skipping the large puddle on the ground accumulated due to the rains that had Velaris freezing overnight.
Feyre failed miserably, her boots and leggings getting wet from the splash that signalled her downfall against the watery enemy of hers. But Feyre was not fazed. She simply laughed alongside Y/n, her eyes crinkling as the two of them made their way back to the river house.
It was visible already now, Y/n could even make out the grains in the wood of the door as it opened, and her brother in laws, along with her mate, spilled out.
Y/n could see from the corner of her eyes as her sister lit up at seeing her mate, her husband and the father of her child. The moment his eyes met her, she took off, her arms spread as she ran up to him and threw her arms around his neck. Rhysand did not hold back either, clutching Feyre to her chest with as much enthusiasm as she held him.
It made Y/n smile.
Y/n then glanced behind the embracing couple to her mate, the overwhelming urge to hug him too and to claim him in front of anyone watching making her start walking towards him without even realising.
Which was reckless, as the moment he realised she was walking towards him to hug him? He took a step back.
Y/n knew that he hated being affectionate in front of others, but this was cruel.
So to not get embarrassed by his rejection, Y/n turned swiftly towards Cassian, her other brother in law, who stood not too far from where Azriel did, and hugged him instead.
Cassian, Mother bless his heart, did not even question it.
He wrapped his arms around Y/n and literally lifted her off the ground, cackling when Y/n's fist made contact with his shoulder over and over again as she demanded to be put down.
Y/n had to stop herself from thinking back to that day. She did not want to relive the pain she had felt, the sadness and anger.
Y/n watched his eyes fluttering, wondering if he was dreaming. Wondering who he was dreaming about.
It definitely was not her, that was for sure.
Y/n, feeing a little sadness taking root in her heart, returned to the portrait in her hands, questioning if it would even be worth it finishing it up when he sure as hell wouldn't even acknowledge it. Or her.
Y/n glanced at the paint supplies she had placed on the coffee table next to her, having wanted to capture a moment of him letting his guard down, of him being vulnerable using her best paints, knowing he would not care.
She guessed living for as long as he had, life and the small things didn't matter as much anymore. Maybe that was why he loved to go on the missions Rhysand, Y/n's brother in law, gave him.
It probably gave him the thrill nothing else did anymore.
With Y/n's sister just having given birth to the starlight of the court, Rhys had become more and more protective, sending his brothers and anyone and everyone at his disposal to check and report about every trivial thing that made his primal mate and father side get protective.
Slowly, Y/n reached for the brush that rested in the cup half filled with coloured water, deciding to finish the half done portrait. If he did not care... she did not now what she would do then, but she did know she was tired of being tolerated by him.
But what could she even do? It was not like she could just up and leave.
Y/n blinked.
Or... could she?
Y/n shook her head, as if to dislodge the though, and with a sigh, she let herself get lost in the soft skill of painting her sister had taught her long ago, when staying up and huddling under worn blankets was the only thing bringing any warmth.
Trying not to think about the fact that the last time she remembered him caring for her, genuinely caring for her, was only when the two had been in their early stages of relation ship and the mating bond was a very new experience to a newly made fae Y/n, she continued using the soft and strong, long and short strokes to finish up her latest masterpiece.
Of course, Y/n never would call herself a creator of masterpieces, but any and all art that included her perfect mate was destined to be a masterpiece.
Time lost its meaning, and all that mattered was capturing the perfect angle for his eyes, nose, lips, shoulder.
Nothing existed but Y/n, her art, and her muse.
Nothing existed but the soft rise and fall of his back as he lay sprawled on his stomach, the effortless way his wings draped across the whole bed, taking up space three wingless fae could have slept in.
Where Y/n would have slept in, on days when everything had been filled with stars and dreams, wrapped under his warm wing like it were a living blanket.
When he pretended he was nothing, absolutely nothing but her mate. Her husband. Not a spymaster, not a shadowsinger, not a brother. Just her mate, her lover.
Those days were far gone now.
•○🌑○•
Despite the fact that she knew he would most definitely not care, Y/n was excited.
And that was downplaying what she felt.
The wait was killing her, the amount of adrenaline in her bloodstream making her want to jump around to get rid of the energy that made her shiver, her limbs going cold and warm at the same time. She had to push her fists together and shove them between her thighs to keep them from shaking, which did not help at all.
So Y/n waited, her body clenched in anticipation as she stared at the doorway that led into the living room, a big grin on her face.
She glanced once at the sketchpad in front of her on the table, admiring her artwork for a moment.
She never liked whatever she made, always feeling like it lacked something. So for her to be excited to show off her art to her mate was a huge indication to how much she loved the portrait.
The familiar scuff of worn boots drew Y/n's attention, and she shot to her feet, pressing her fists to the back of her thighs.
It had become a habit of Azriel's, to purposefully make some noise before he stepped in view so as not to startle her with his appearance.
The action melted Y/n's heart every single time.
He stepped into view, as ethereal as the day Y/n had first seen him as a human, just as beautiful as he had looked that day as he tried to get comfortable on the small chair in the manor on the other side of the wall, just as loveable as that day when she had ended up losing her heart to the low born fae that should have intimated her.
He was fumbling with his armor, making sure it was all secured properly before he left for whatever mission Rhys assigned him for that day.
He glanced up just as he walked past Y/n to the kitchen counter, a small smile gracing his face before his attention was again diverted.
Y/n tried not to deflate at his lack of enthusiasm.
"Good morning love. Look-"
"Good morning Y/n." He cut her off, his voice void of emotions, as if he was tired of saying the same thing every morning and wanted to get it over with. He didn't even glance at Y/n as he said it, and Y/n pretended not to notice that he used her name instead of whatever endearing name he would have picked before.
"I will be on a scouting trip to Illyria, and after I have a meeting and dinner scheduled with Rhys and Cass, so I will be late coming home. Don't wait up."
Y/n's smile faded. "Don't wait up or stay out of my way?"
Azriel froze. "What?"
Y/n released a humourless laugh. "Nothing. Go have fun."
Azriel turned, giving her a hard look. "You know I would rather stay at home with you."
Doubtful.
Y/n so badly wanted to say it to his face, but she did not want to fight with him so early in the morning, so she sighed, smiled and nodded.
He started walking towards the door, and despite her anger, Y/n walked forward to kiss his cheek.
She did not miss how he recoiled.
Y/n masked the hurt before he could see it, and he gave her an awkward smile before he maneuvered to walk around her, careful not to brush against her.
Y/n watched him walk away, staring hard at the door even long after he'd left.
She then glanced at the portrait she had abandoned on the table, and, her heart hardening, turned away.
She was tired of having her love be tolerated, and she would not have it be that way anymore.
Either he accept her love the way it was, loud and clear, or he go find someone else.
And so, she turned, walked up the stairs to the bedchambers she shared with Azriel, and began to turn it back into just his bedchambers.
She would no longer be tolerated only because some godly entity thought she and him would make great, powerful kids and tied them together with a string.
She deserved to be cherished.
•○🌑○•
Part 2
Taglist: @bubybubsters @eos-princess @nightless @harrystylesfan2686 @cassie6392 @kennedy-brooke @tele86 @miluiel1 @hnyclover @minnieoo @sidrapotter @piceous21 @mybestfriendmademe @saltedcoffeescotch @eve175
Azriel Taglist: @darthdumbasss @foreverrandomwritings @azrielsmate3 @celestialend
#azriel x reader#azriel shadowsinger#azriel#azriel fic#acotar#acotar fandom#acotar fanfic#acotar fluff#acotar series#acotar writing#mating bond#sarah j maas#a court of thorns and roses#acotar headcanon#azriel spymaster#azriel acotar#acotar fanfiction#azriel fanfic#azriel x you
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Azriel listening to Rhys, Cassian and Lucien talk about their mating bonds
Rhys: I just wanted to kill everyone near her!
Lucien: Same! Nothing was stopping me from getting to her and covering her up with my jacket
Cassian: It's crazy! Does it ever sound like there's music and singing when you're around them?
Rhys & Lucien: *nodding in agreement* Yeah, definitely!
Rhys: and picturing her smile, gods that would get me through the day. Just that image glowing quietly in my chest...
Cassian: *sighing* yeah, it's a beautiful thing!
Lucien: *nodding in agreement*
Azriel, looking wide-eyed in the corner
#incorrect acotar quotes#azriel x gwyn#gwynriel#pro gwynriel#elucien#nessian#feysand#acotar#acotar fanfiction#mating bond
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Demiaroace Luffy is my favorite thing because one day he's not giving a single fuck about sex and the other he wants to do all sorts of viscerally, grotesque, disgusting sexual atrocities with Zoro because he looked "really pretty after slicing someone in half" and he doesn't know where the hell those feelings came from but he needs Zoro right the fuck now. But also Zoro smiles and the sun shines just perfectly on him and it makes his heart act silly and now he's blushing and covering his face with the straw hat and he would rather jump overboard to the sea than experience that again because what the fuck Nami fix this please-
#he's a demi disaster imo#when you think you're safe from romantic dramas but then your first mate starts forming a deep bond with you and you like like him#i think luffy would be so careless abt the sex part bc that's just like. consuming zoro is super normal#but then flirting with zoro is like. fucking torture#one piece#monkey d. luffy#roronoa zoro#zolu
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Art: @knifedippedinichor
Feysand
Nessian
Elucien
#acotar#acosf#nesta archeron#nessian#cassian#nesta x cassian#feyre x rhysand#feyre archeron#rhysand acotar#feysand#elain archeron#lucien vanserra#elucien endgame#elucien#acotar fanart#thank you artists#support real artists#artists on tumblr#acosf fanart#acomaf#acowar#mating bond#fated mates
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