#manic complaints about shit

[manicali]

Fml. I have a whole ass two week project due tomorrow. I have done a whole lot of nothing and now Im paralyzed by overwhelm. Fuckkkkk im dead.

[thatsthewrongwallcraig]

Olive

Summary: On your knees, open up and apologize!

Pairing: Karl Heisenberg x afab!Reader

Word Count: -2.2k

Content Warnings: Hardly Any Plot Just Smut 18+!, Misogyny-play (I dunno what else to call this, okay?), Oral (M Receiving), Karl Being A Little Shit About It, Deepthroating, Slight Choking, Subspace, Uhm…Sweat 😬, Bodily Fragrances, Body Worship, Humiliation/Praise, Manhandling, Karl Has A Dad Bod, Aftercare <3

A/N: Anne, this is all your fault and you know it! This is a little gift from yours truly <3

Tagging: @queer-crusader @ohlookapan @blueberrypancakesworld @somethingblu3

Me and my babe relax and catch the manic rhapsody

All reason flown as God looks on in abject apathy

A squall and all of me is a prayer in perfect piety

A moment's silence when my baby puts the mouth on me

- Moment's Silence By Hozier

For a split second, you halted, mouth already agape and the tip of your tongue ready to fire an entire tirade of complaints into the stuffy air of Karl's workshop. Unsuspecting, not even looking at you after you made a grand entrance barging through the door like that, Karl just sat there, soldering iron in his right and his nose scrunched up to keep his glasses from sliding down the bridge alongside some wayward droplets of sweat.

Your eyes darted at him, glaring with annoyance and frustration-fueled fury as they scanned his slightly hunched-down statue. He looked enragingly good with his shaggy hair tied into a low ponytail and his stupid, olive-green work overall pooling around his waist, giving way for you to ogle at his bare torso, skin glowing in an orange hue emitting from the embers of the furnace behind him, pale scar tissue forming a krass contrast all along his shoulders and chest.

You cleared your throat to remind yourself why you were here and to actually stay mad instead of letting your anger slide because of some silly pretty privilege.

“Huh?” Karl's eyes behind his glasses moved, inspecting curiously.

“All I do is clean up after you!”, It practically broke free from your throat in a strained groan, uncomfortably strong emotions bubbling in the pit of your stomach,

“I'm fucking sick of it, Karl. All I asked of you was to do the bed and put your damn dishes in the sink to help me out for once!”

“Uh-Huh.” Karl nodded briefly, not appearing moved by your frustration at all.

“Uh-Huh?! Karl.” It took every bit of composure to not just stomp your feet in a childish burst of anger.

“That's my name.” He mocked, his words stinging just like the white-hot tip of his soldering iron.

“Oh, fuck you!” That made him straighten up eventually.

“Excuse me?” Karl put his tool down before raising his glasses to lazily sit at the crown of his head.

“I said that you can go fuck yourself because you do fuck all to pull your weight with the chores. I'm trying to keep this place from turning into a trash dump!” You watched him intently, trying to decipher what was happening in this awfully stubborn head of his.

“Would you please say that to my face again, sweets?” The anger in your stomach dropped and rendered into a sharp jolt of embarrassment because you knew just fine that you were getting yourself onto fragile ice.

“Hm?” You tilted your head to the side and furrowed your brows into a questioning arch.

“Come here.”, Karl repeated himself swiftly, tapping his palm onto his thigh, “And say that to my face again.”

Regret kicked in almost immediately, growing into a nervous buzzing sensation with every step bringing you closer to your lover.

“There you go, I'm all ears.” Gray eyes beamed at you as you leaned your behind against the edge of the table.

“You don't help me with any of the chores.” You dropped your gaze and mumbled away meekly.

“That's not exactly what reached my ears a few minutes ago, now is it?” Karl crossed his arms in front of his chest, scarred forearms finding rest against curly, white hairs.

“I said you can go fuck yourself because I am angry with you. The bed still looks a mess and it wouldn't even take you 5 minutes.” Heat crept into your face because you knew all too well that you screwed up big time.

“Okay. Heard.”, Karl clicked his tongue before absentmindedly sucking his bottom lip between his teeth for a brief moment, “But what makes you think you're eligible to talk to me like that now, huh?”

“ ‘M sorry.” You felt like taking a step back but the table wouldn't let you.

“Alright, that doesn't really cut it, pumpkin. All that foul stuff leaving your mouth? Filthy, don't you think?” The way his voice had a rather peculiar edge to it made you look up again, your eyes being met with a sly grin that reached up to his eyes, laugh lines, and crow's feet wrinkling softly, pretty bastard.

“I don't appreciate you talking to me like that and I really believe you should make up for it, no?” A jolt of embarrassment went through your chest before the very same sensation went straight down amidst your legs.

The way Karl looked at you, eyes sparkling with twisted mischief, weirdly reassuring you that he heard you although you certainly overstepped a line here, rendered you weak in the knees. Like a teenager in love, serotonin and dopamine wreaking havoc and working overtime to soothe the pounding frustration from earlier.

As much as you tried to stay mad at him, you just couldn't, not when he played you so deliciously just like that, knowing full well that he had you wrapped around his finger with ease.

“Do you need me to shut you up or are you going to behave and do that by yourself?” Every word made you more self-aware about your face probably glowing with a double-edged sense of shame.

“I'm really sorry…” You repeated yourself under your breath, forcing your stunted body to move, to nonverbally admit to your failings and sink down to your knees whilst bashfully aware of your mouth watering, conditioned to do so just fine.

“There you go.” Karl cooed, teeth nipping at his bottom lip whilst his granite eyes watched your every move, pupils blowing in lust as they followed you working the buttons on his jumper.

He felt himself getting harder with every oh-so-innocent bat of your lashes, his pulse picking up significantly just like yours. You halted for a brief moment, inhaling deeply through your nose, breathing him in at his full intensity, pheromones hijacking your brain immediately.

“Too much to handle, pumpkin? Uh-oh, if that ain’t the consequences of your actions.” His snarky comment pushed heat into your face.

Karl was right, it was more of him that you were used to but you quickly came to find out that that wasn’t necessarily something bad. Instead, you embraced it, took it the way it was because you’d successfully gotten yourself into this situation. You didn’t deserve anything else right now and you accepted it.

“Fuck…” The Lord of Metal hissed under his breath as you shamelessly nuzzled your face into his crotch, the tip of your nose snugly nestled amongst curly, gray pubes and lips playfully nipping at his stiffening shaft.

It wasn’t even a matter of a whole minute until his entire length stood against your cheek, the tip of his cock soft to the touch but throbbing.

“I know you’re a whore but I never took you for the dirty, nasty kind.” He egged you on, only feeding into this rather new and rapidly forming fantasy that was taking all of you by storm.

You already enjoyed it plenty when he got out of his workshop in the evenings, cuddling himself into bed next to you with hints of oil, fire, and sweat clinging to him, rendered you feral in seconds, but this right here made you dizzy; cock-drunk without even having him inside you just yet. And although your lips found themselves busy with kissing and nibbling the lack of having your impertinent brat mouth stuffed turned you impatient. You wanted to drag it out, for his pleasure…and yours, however you nearly couldn’t manage, saliva pooling beneath your tongue.

“See? That’s exactly where you’re supposed to be instead of right in my face yappin’ about dirty dishes, sweets. Be thankful that I touch the dirty fucking dishes at all, bitch.” The nearly threatening shift in his tone sent you spiraling in the best way possible.

“ ‘M sorry…” You mouthed against the tuft of hair.

“Huh? What’s that?” In a firm smack, his palm found your cheek before the same hand clasped at you by the jaw, squishing your mouth in mockery and you nearly cried out in need for him to manhandle you like that.

“ ‘M SORRY, SIR.” You pressed from a squeezed mouth to the best of your abilities.

“Ah, that’s it. Now quit playing around.” Karl released your face from his grip with a little bit of momentum, making you sway in your position before leaning back in and wrapping your lips around his girth.

A wanton moan echoed around his cock because not only did Karl smell much more intense, he also tasted the part, effectively rendering you dumb with only one objective on your brain: serve.

“Freaking slut, enjoying yourself, huh?” He thrust his lap right into your face, your nose pressing against the soft curve of his belly pooch whilst he spearheaded along your tongue down into your throat.

The sudden jut of his hips made you gag around him, the root of your tongue contracting in tandem with your larynx, coaxing a pleased grunt from Karl’s lips. In a juxtaposed, twisted way your overwhelming discomfort brought a nearly unimaginable amount of pleasure, your love for consensual pain and humiliation nearly as large as the one you felt for Karl.

Your knees scratched over the concrete floor of his workshop as his fingers snaked along the back of your head, grabbing it by your hair in fistfuls to harshly guide your mouth to bop on his cock. An amalgamation of spittle and eager droplets of salty precum covered the inside of your mouth and squelched from the corners of your lips, dripping down into his lap.

“Sloppy bitch.”, Karl commented between quiet groans, half-lidded eyes watching you taking him whole with every jerk of your head, “Keep it together.”

Punishment followed immediately, Karl’s other hand darting to pinch your nose shut.

“Uh, no, no, no.”, The Lord shushed upon you starting to gag and slightly panic instantly, “I gotchu, be good.”

You suppressed the intrinsic instinct to breathe, nose incapacitated and your esophagus gagged with Karl’s pulsing girth, tongue pressed right against the bottom of his cock, involuntarily caressing the thick vein that prodded along your tastebuds.

Don’t gag, don’t gag, don’t -

Tears threatened to spill over your lower lash line, the watery blur glazing over your sight, lungs pulling and tearing inwards in a gradually worsening need for fresh oxygen.

“Just a little more, fuck- so tight…” Karl groaned, pointy canines digging into the tender flesh of his bottom lip, scratching over and slightly through the skin.

Not being able to breathe turned increasingly painful, your ribcage being set ablaze by an itch you simply couldn’t scratch right now.

“There, there, good fucking girl.” The words rumbled through his chest accompanied by a final forcefully maneuvered jerk of your head.

Little black patches danced over your retina and you felt dangerously lightheaded as the first thick ropes of cum gushed down your throat and for a split second your body nearly spasms in such panic that you almost bit his twitching dick right off. Instead, Karl released the tip of your nose from his pinching clasp and your jaw went slack, joints aching in overuse, and yet you obediently swallowed, took it all down to the very last bit, saliva, tears, and mucus gathering at your chin whilst you breathed yourself through it.

However absurd it would’ve sounded to explain it to someone who’d never been in your shoes just like that, finishing your task sparked a sense of pride to bloom in your chest.

“So good, so perfect, come’ere.” Karl pulled himself out of you, leaving you pleasantly sore whilst you catch your breath, your body still feeling wobbly and overly sensitive.

He held you by both wrists as he helped you get up before pulling your slightly shaking form onto his lap, his lips leaving a wash of kisses all across your heated face the very second you sat down.

“You okay, hun?” You nodded in response, weak arms wrapping around his shoulders to find more purchase.

“Was a bit rough, no? I know.”, Karl started wiping the tears from under your eyes with his thumbs, both palms encasing your face tenderly, “I’m sorry, got a bit carried away.”

You couldn’t be angry at him for it had felt too good and you knew that he would never seriously hurt you on purpose.

“Issok.” Your voice was but a breathy little whisper.

“Sure? How ‘bout I make it up to you?”, Karl started grinning as the spark of an idea flickered behind the pale gray in his eyes, “How about I move my partially lazy ass into the kitchen, do the dishes, meanwhile, you’re free to enjoy a nice hot bath I’ll pour you and afterward I’ll take good care of you, hm? I better have my jaw sore by the end of the day too, only fair.”

The lightly damp tip of his nose gently nudged against yours, his wicked smile contagious enough to catch on to you.

[autumn-foxfire]

IT'S TIME! FIST OF BLUE SAPPHIRE! THE NUMBER ONE KAISHIN MOVIE!

How interesting though, that this movie is set after Ran and Shinichi are officially dating but they went for KaiShin instead with ShinRan sprinkled in from time to time. I guess they were like "you had your cheek kiss, let the gays have something" and we appreciate them for doing so!

And that card is how poor Kaito is dragged into this sinster plot T-T

I appreciate the movie actually understanding Ai's character better than Gosho does. This should have been her response when Shinichi had pestered her for the antidote for the school trip.

I still don't know why Yuusaku hasn't used his "many" connections to help his son get a passport but Kaito's solution worked too. And is a lot gayer.

Kaito really likes to dress up as cute girls XD We stan a gender non-conforming thief.

We don't acknowledge enough how gay Kaito's "I've been waiting a long time for you," is. We know honey. The boy still believes that he's straight but he'll get there.

Did Kaito strip Shinichi to put all that tan on him? I just need to know. Because that is also very gay of him (also creepy but he was only did it because he needed Shinichi's help and he knows that Conan can't be in Singapore so he's just being a good future husband protecting his identity).

Shinichi always sees Kaito as so handsome.

The second best part of this movie beside the Kaishin? We get really cute Makosono.

It's funny that Sonoko says "they have good vibes between them" but we know that Ran is already aware that this is Kaito and she's acting to catch him off guard. She's a better actor than Shinichi and now I believe that she's always acting when it comes to Shinichi.

Kaito and Shinichi are already being gay with one another. Come on guys, get a room. Shinichi has just been kidnapped and he does not give a shit because it was his husband that did so.

Agasa totally made that suitcase. Jii definitely had him make it. What I'm saying is that Agasa is a bro and wanted Shinichi to have a date with his boyfriend.

Shinichi and his love for Sherlock Holmes T-T

Ran is very pretty in this dress by the way. It's a shame that her wife isn't here. My only complaint about this movie is that there is no Sera even though she definitely should have been.

This movie shows us why KaiShin are such a great couple with one another. There's no tension between them, they're always on the same wavelength and it's amazing.

Makoto showing us why he's an amazing boyfriend and why he and Sonoko are so great together!

Sonoko is very gorgeous in this movie.

I love how he panics. When Shinichi panics he drops all pretense but with Kaito, he keeps his grin on his face, probably because of how he's trained his poker face but all it does is make him look manic XD

Kaito's love for sweets is being seen too T-T

Sonoko is the most supportive girlfriend.

It can't be a double date Sonoko with Ran, Ran's wife isn't here sadly. But you can have a double date with KaiShin.

Ran: This is definitely not Shinichi. He is not a smooth talker at all. And he would not interact with my dad that way.

This movie actually also shows us Ran's intelligence, though it's only revealed at the end. What I'm going with this is that SHE. SHOULD. KNOW.

One complaint, again. But how come Makoto gets to have muscles. It's not very apparent but they're there. Ran should get them too.

We love a self-confident Kaito. And Shinichi being exasperated at his husband for being so.

The jealousy Makoto has towards KID is actually one of the few in the series that I don't mind because Sonoko is very open about how she is attracted to KID (though she has assured Makoto her heart is his and even here she makes sure he knows that).

You know Leon saying Kaito's hands belong to that of a magician is also something Ran uses as confirmation that this isn't Shinichi.

You know Kaito is annoyed because it's Shinichi that deserves all the praise that Kogoro gets.

We know that Ran knows this is Kaito, so I'm willing to be she also knows that Arthur is actually Conan and that's why she's okay with this small child who is all alone following them around. Let her be the intelligent women that she is.

Kaito, my smart boy.

AND HIS FIRST HEIST STARTS.

HE'S SO ACROBATIC. HE'S INCREDIBLE. Although, it's because he's so acrobatic that I find it hard to believe his hands are "supple" like it's said. Gymnasts are prone to calluses on their hands due to it. I guess the excuse is that Kaito wears gloves, but that doesn't actually stop them from forming.

MY POOR BABY GOT TASED. AND THEN ALMOST DROWNED. This is the Kaito goes through it movie.

Leon: I am one step ahead.

Shinichi: Hold my beer.

KAITO JUST SHOOTING THE GUY WHO GETS IN THE WAY IS SO FUNNY. He knows who the danger is.

Kaito your adrenaline junkie is showing.

He's so goddamn pleased that Shinichi helped him.

Shinichi: Got to save my idiot husband.

He looks so good in this movie.

And Shinichi just casually waiting for his husband to pick him up is so goddamn cute of him T-T THIS MOVIE IS SO GOOD T-T

They're so adorable, flying over the city while discussing a case. It shows how much trust they have in each other.

And there's the obligatory Shinichi and Ran. I can't even be made about it because I'm being fed so well.

Shinichi is so flustered that Kaito is actually interested in why he chose his name. He's not used to it.

AND HE'S SO CONCERNED FOR KAITO.

Someone pointed out that Kaito doesn't hold his hand over his heart, he usually holds it more to the left. So there is a reason he does so for Shinichi and that reason is gay, gay, homosexual gay.

Lol I just noticed he stole Shinichi's shoes and put him in sandles.

And the acting award goes to Ran! She's doing all of this just to catch out KID and we love her for it!

In fact, she knowing that this is Kaito but chosing not revealing that it is actually gives support that she to my idea that she knows Arthur is Conan and that there must be some way he brought Conan here that was illegal so the only way he can actually get him back home is to let Kaito be arrested in Japan. In this essay I will-

ANOTHER GREAT THING ABOUT THIS MOVIE. Ran is showing off how much she enjoys martial arts too.

The distance Ran put between herself and Kaito is so interesting (and Sonoko doesn't even notice, suggesting she'd do the same for the actual Shinichi).

I'm assuming that Kaito raided Shinichi's wardrobe because Shinichi likes pink shirts with white. He wore it in London and now Kaito is wearing pink and white in Singapore.

I love Kaito's disgrunted look in the background when Kogoro says he won't get the belt. Those are fighting words.

Awww, Shinichi looking back at Kaito was adorable. He's curious but also concerned about his husband as he knows he's being led into traps.

MAKOTO T-T DON'T LISTEN TO HIM.

TIME FOR CUTE MAKOSONO. And Ran is a bro letting Sonoko have some alone time with Makoto, using Kaito as an excuse (she also wants to investigate).

We love Ran.

KAITO OUR GENDER NON-CONFORMING QUEEN. I love how he flirts with the inspector to return his phone too. My queer king. (Yes he is a king and a queen).

Kaito, did you really need to drop your skirt first? Or have you always wanted to do that.

I like to believe that Kaito only noticed the letters because he's learnt a lot from his detective boyfriend.

ALSO ANOTHER THING A PERSON NOTICED THAT WASN'T ME. This time around, Kaito included a propellor on his handglider. There was another Kaishin movie where his detective boyfriend complained about having to land and Kaito telling him they had no choice as it's not like he has a propellor on his glider. Me thinks, he doth use one now due to that.

MY DEAR KAITO

This is why we don't like police. They shoot indiscriminately.

What's with this face Shinichi. Disappointed? Or concerned? Both. He can't have his husband framed.

Nah, definitely concerned.

MY POOR BABY.

I adore the way Sonoko looks at Makoto.

She adores him so much.

And Makoto adores her and just wants to do everything in his power to keep her safe T-T Him catching the knife between his fingers was so cool of him.

SONOKO.

She's going through it too. She and KID can bond over their suffering.

KAITO THE JANITOR T-T Keeping up the act even though he's been injured himself and is in pain.

MY POOR BABY CAN'T EVEN GET PROPER TREATMENT. SHINICHI GO BANDAGE UP YOUR BOYFRIEND.

He's so calm about Shinichi seeing him as his true self too.

Hehe, half naked.

NO ONE SPEAKS ABOUT HOW GREAT THIS MOMENT IS. KAITO GIVES EVERYTHING BACK TO SHINICHI, ASKING FOR HIS FULL SUPPORT TO SOLVE THE MURDER BECAUSE THATS HOW MUCH HE TRUSTS HIM. AND SHINICHI DOES SO. HE DOES WHAT KAITO ASKS.

Shinichi does not need a room with two beds. So, what I'm saying is that they shared a bed. And Shinichi is the blanket hog while Kaito sleeps with barely any and snores. Actually, with how wrapped up Shinichi is and how there is so little on Kaito but the bedding is going in the direction of Shinichi, I think we can confirm this is a double bed they are sharing, as well as a blanket. Noting this down.

OOF. He just lets Rishi fall to the hard floor. Shinichi you are a cruel man but I can excuse you because you want to solve this case before your husband is hurt any more.

MAKOTO AND SONOKO ARE SO CUTE IN THIS MOVIE.

We don't get to see Sonoko and Makoto as casual as they're being so it's nice to see them interact.

TIME FOR KAITO'S COMEBACK.

Awwww, this isn't what Sonoko wants Makoto T-T She wants you to be at your happiest and she knows that is fighting against those who are strong. She doesn't want to be a burden to you.

ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT SONOKO'S RESPONSE TO FEELING LIED TO! IT'S WHAT WE'VE WANTED WITH RAN AND MORE. SHE IS UPSET MAKOTO ISN'T BEING HONEST WITH HER AND WON'T LET HIM TRY AND LIE TO HER. QUEEN BEHAVIOUR.

I know what you are Kaito.

RAN JUST DOESN'T CARE SHINICHI IS SCREAMING. She totally knows that Conan is Arthur (and that Shinichi is Conan) and is letting him tell of his boyfriend.

Kaito gets Shinichi down to a tee, even to how he abandons Ran T-T

TIME FOR SHINICHI AND KAITO TO BE GAY MASTERMINDS WHO SOLVE THE CASE TOGETHER. The gay part is very important to it.

Look at these babies being dramatic together as they sum up the case so far to try and solve it.

This is how playful teasing is done by the way. Neither of them think less of the other so the teasing is just that, something that neither of them mean. This can't be done between Ran and Shinichi because we know he actually views her that way.

KAITO BOUGHT SHINICHI A SNACK AND IT'S SO CUTE. HE'S NOT EVEN BOTHERED BY HIM REVEALING THE TRICK, JUST CURIOUS HOW HE KNEW IT WAS COCONUT WATER.

I love Kaito using casual magic tricks with Shinichi too. It's just so cute and so Kaito.

Shinichi: Haibara, can you figure out who this is? KID took it

Ai: WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU WITH KID?!

Shinichi: ...I'll explain later

Ai, already used to Shinichi at this point: Fine, don't be stupid.

It's kind of funny that Leon says he'll build a new city and he's not wrong because Shinichi and Kaito do blow it up for him.

Kogoro: Did I just get mugged?

LMAO Ai knows Shinichi so goddamn well. It's why they make great partners.

Kaito is having fun playing detective, isn't he.

Shinichi: My idiot husband fell right into the trap

Kaito: As if you haven't fallen for things like this too

And Rishi fell into Shinichi's trap.

Poor Sonokoa and Makoto.

LOL Kaito be careful of your detective. You don't want him falling off your shoulders.

SHINICHI AND KAITO DOUBLE TEAM.

LMAO Shinichi shading both Rishi and Leon. He's the king at making you feel stupid XD

Kaito: Actually the detective is closer than you think.

TIME FOR THE CLIMAX.

MAKOTO T-T He'll protect Sonoko with his life.

RAN. YES. SHE GETS TO BE INCREDIBLE. ANOTHER SCORE FOR THIS MOVIE.

And it's Shinichi who gets to be the damsel in distress who is saved by his man T-T As we love!

AND IT'S TIME FOR SHINICHI'S BEST PLAN TO DATE. HE ASKS KAITO TO HELP HIM BLOW UP A HOTEL.

I WANT TO SPEAK ABOUT HOW KAITO IS CARRING AROUND AND PROTECTING HIS LOVE WHILE MAKOTO IS DOING THE SAME. CAN I?

Kaito is one hell of a shot. And he has no ascended to the god of fighting as that was said to be the only thing to make the bracelet fall off.

Obligatory Shinichi saving Ran where it wasn't really needed but I'll allow it because we've been fed so much AND-

She gets the last move. So it's okay.

And Kaito can't forget his purpose. He is a jewel thief after all. And it makes a good reason to get people to shoot at him.

Kaito loves to make people bungee jump. He has to make them into extreme sport lovers too.

Oooh. What do you do two do in the bedroom. Makoto is very good at tying knots I see.

TIME FOR THIS SHIP TO MOVE. Kaito and Shinichi are so insane for this.

Makoto fighting with Sonoko on his back is also insane.

I JUST REALISED HE WAS HOLDING HER HAND! I ADORE THEM.

Sorry, that's just really funny.

Shinichi and Kaito did this. I fucking love them.

And Kaito has fun having the last word. King.

Sonoko has a fringe? I just thought it was as long as her bangs.

ADORABLE!

Shinichi got to say the line. Can't have a movie without it.

RAN IS THE MVP OF THIS MOVIE AND THIS IS WHY. SHE IS AN AMAZING ACTRESS AND PUTS SHINICHI TO SHAME.

What a warm welcome home for Kaito.

Again, it's not cute for Shinichi to insult Ran because he means it. Also she doesn't KNOW YOU FUCKING ASS.

Well. We'll ignore that last moment.

[weaselbeaselpants]

I really dislike Chaggie being compared to Jally. I ship both, but....

Jack and Sally aren't a couple in Nightmare til the very end. Jack only comes around once he's literally been shot at and forced to see things out of his fantasies for once and realize that other people really do love and support him; like Sally. The entire rest of the time Jack's stuck in his own mind. Sally's in love with Jack but she's actually not supportive of his Christmas and even tries sabotaging it because she knows what he's doing is wrong even if it took an unexplained visionflower for her to get that hunch first. Her line is literally "although I'd like to stand by him" not "I support him even if I really don't want to". And in the end not only is Sally vindicated by being right like Santa says she is, but Jack suddenly realizes what she's done and falls for her right then. YMMV on how good a couple they'd actually make ((they aren't Diane and Mr. PB; eat shoot Lindsay Ellis *annoying cries*)) but that's what's cute about Jack and Sally: Sally does her pining maturely (stalking not included) while Jack instantly falls all over in love with her because he's Jack.

I understand there are different interpretations w people think Jack was always in love with Sally but obviously I digress and have always kind of disagreed with that reading, as did the writers of TNBC. Because, if you did have a version where Jack was always feeling something romantic towards Sally, or WORSE, was in a relationship- you would get Charlie x Vaggie.

If I'm right (seasoned hazbinnies feel free to correct me on this) Charlie and Vaggie were not written to be lovers initially but later retconned into being later into the writing process....which shows. I think promo stuff from back then called the two just "friends" and Vaggie and Charlie don't act very romantic. As I just laid out and as any shipper of Jally could tell you it's not hard to make that kind of dynamic cute and quirky. The problem is it isn't even THERE.

Vaggie is apparently Charlie's girlfriend and I guess just also believes in the hotel but is skeptical of it, though I wouldn't consider that on par w Sally who was straight up gonna poison Jack in one of Caroyln Thompson's earlier scripts. Especially given that she's an angel this could either work for or against her character but Vaggie seems more like an agent then a loving bestie, even. I think I remember one of the spin off comics for Hazbin which had Vaggie just straight up admitting she's doing the hotel plan because it makes Charlie happy and she'll do anything Charlie wants.

To be honest, it reminds me more of Dr. Mrs. the Monarch from Venture Bros going on about how/why she puts up with Monarch's shit when he doesn't listen to her and it's because he has "passion for a villain"...the difference is that in that case you can kind of get where Mrs. the Monarch's coming from in her emotions. With Vaggie, well, guess that's a sin of not having all the details of her feelings laid out yet. I mean, when you ever get Vaggie's feelings. Such little work about your main couple in comparison to Angel or Alastor.

AND THEN CHARLIE? You can really tell she wasn't written w Vaggie as her gf in mind.

Boy howdy I REALLY HOPE for the series that Viv and co listened to some of the crew complaints and gave Charlie a more empathetic and supportive vibe because ho mah gawd and I mean this as someone who ships them- Charlie is a HORRIBLE girlfriend in the pilot.

Again, thematically, Jack has the excuse of being in a manic depressive episode and also not knowing Sally very much at all in TNBC. He sees her as just another one of his Halloween Town friends who's especially talented but doesn't even realize she and the rest of the town cares. He's not listening to her when she comes to warn him because he's self obsessed. He's nice to her but also passive cause that's how he is at that point of the story, even if he's gentlemanly about it. Compare to Charlie who, while always adorable Didneyprincessesque, is dismissive of Vaggie's concerns, anger, fears and reform while she's not only aware of Vaggie's feelings WHILE BEING IN AN APPARENTLY COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP WITH HER is concerning. And that's before you get to Charlie not noticing Vaggie getting tossed around by Alastor right in front of her.

It'd be different if Al does his weird smarmy shit and Charlie is uncomfy but only stiffens up and shows her actual strong side to him when he touches Vaggie- "HEY! Don't you lay a finger on her!" but no, nothing.

I ultimately get what Viv wants and is going for by comparing Charlie and Vaggie to tnbc, but I think in practice in the pilot it fails because it

was never planned out to be a couple

they're supposed to be a couple but Charlie and Vaggie aren't all that romantic

they're supposed to be a couple but Charlie isn't very supportive or even defensive

People give Jack a lot of shit (rightfully, in the video games) and give the movie and Jally shit for being a "bad fit" but I again vouch for them not only on the grounds of tnbc being complete and at home in it's own skin. The rest of the franchise not so much, but the movie and the writers of the character know what kind of person Jack is and have his redemptive quality be that he falls for Sally; I love him and Sally both as characters but also as a couple for that reason. I'd feel totally different if Jack, say, was Sally's bf throughout the film and acted the way Charlie did. I can be critical of TNBC and I think some of Jack's writing is flawed and could be better, but y'know, I will defend it pedantically like I'm doing right now.

With Charlie and Vaggie, I ship them because they're my favorite characters from the pilot but dayum. I'm the kind of hermitshipper who's able to sustain myself off scraps and headcanons and even I'm saying these two need some work. Cuz they do. They need A LOT of work. And better writers.

If Chaggie is ''endgame'' in the final season then I hope "A Happy Day in Hell" is just an outlier scene or it's going to be retconned that they aren't lovers yet because if not- oh Vaggie! Get urself a Hasani Walker comic and fast my gurl you need it.

[jesuisgourde]

Okay, All Quiet On The Eastern Esplanade is out in the states, so time for a listen and a rambling track by track reaction. I'm listening to the whole album through and writing my thoughts, and then listening to it once more and adding any other observations.

I've already heard Run Run Run, and like I said before, it feels very classic Carl track. It's very catchy. I think I have the same complaint as everyone else, which is that it feels over-produced. No one should autotune the Libs, the whole point is that they're a bit wonky. Also I don't like that they've fucked with the equalizer and the vocals sound weirdly muffled? Also, upon this listen-through, this song reminds me a little of Frank Turner, which is a weird musical callback to like 2012. My favorite thing in any song is when the instrumentals cut out and it's just drums and vocals, so I love that as the ending of the song. This whole album has so many varied cultural references which I find very entertaining. Does Peter yell "Get your pants off" or "Get your hands off"?

Already I like the lyric to Mustangs A LOT. Feeling a Lou Reed influence there. Love Peter's high-pitched backing vocals and also the Pigman reference. I really love Libs songs where it's just a little scene set to music. And this is exactly that, in such a good way. Again, not a fan of the mixing. What is it with producers these days and mixing so shittily that the vocals get lost in the background instruments, and everything gets muddied? I had the exact same complaint with the last Manics album. Anyway, love the little jokey bits at the end. The second verse about the nun is such fantastic imagery. (Lastly, I thought it was Mustang, singular? But it's plural on Spotify?)

I Have A Friend has an AMAZING chorus I love it. Also that solo guitar bit from Carl right after, I literally could see him hopping up and down in my head. Love Peter's rolled R's. Okay, upon listening the second time round I really really really like this song. The lyrics are incredible. I think they're my favorite on the album. Social commentary but also absolutely beautiful and amazing imagery.

Merry Old England has a bit of a Hamburg Demonstrations vibe to it, which I love. The further I get into this song, the more I love it. It's such a creative and sarcastic critique of Tory policies and all that. Again, I've criticisms about the mixing. Also the pretty violins makes me miss Miki Beavis's wonky violin in Madres, which I think suits Peter/The Libs way better. Still, they add a nice touch.

Ohhh I love Man With The Melody, the clear pretty vocals. I like that each of the Libs have their own verse, that's so cool! Fuck the autotuning though. I really like this song. Melodically it sounds like a sequel to Milkman's Horse, and thematically a sequel to Fame And Fortune. It sounds like a "reply" or a look back at Anthems. Very pretty, with the lovely piano and minimalist guitar.

Hahahha Oh Shit! feels soooooo early 2000s American pop, in a fun way. It reminds me of something but I can't quite put my finger on it. Something that was on the radio a lot in like 2003 or 2004 maybe? This is clearly a Fun Song, like a slosh your drinks around while dancing all goofy type song. Peter's "And that was the news today" at the end is so silly. I think this track is my least favorite but it is fun.

I already know I love Night Of The Hunter. Firstly because anything that uses the Swan Lake motif has my heart instantly. But also because I love the lyrics, I love when Peter writes songs about noir-type vignettes. Finally, some good shared vocals that aren't drowned out by instruments. Gosh, I love the lyrics of this song, I love the dual meaning in that it is technically about an actual noir film but could easily be talking about Peter's past as well. I really like that the lyrics get priority on this one and the instrumentals are pushed back in the mix with the Swan Lake motif coming forward sometimes. It feels like it needs that minimalism.

The guitar on Baron's Claw is already great from the start. I hear Peter's taking a leaf out of Daniel Darc's book with the close-in breathy vocals, which I'm so into because since I learned about Daniel Darc from Peter and Frederic Lo I've actually fallen in love with his music too. Melody-wise it's very close to The Glassblower from the Fantasy Life album, which is my favorite song off that album, so I'm not surprised I like this song too. I like the story in the song and I like the jazzy brass and piano and Peter's vocals. It feels like it's being sung in a smoky jazz bar. This one is so good.

Shiver is sooo catchy. I find myself humming it sometimes at work even though I haven't yet absorbed all the lyrics in my memory. This is also the real "Libertines mythology" song, so of course it's good. The fact that the lyrical subject matter is made up only of criticizing the monarchy and talking about specific Libertines lore is just so them. It's so short, though! I wish it were longer!

The guitar on Be Young is so chaotic lol. It reminds me of Horrorshow a bit. Okay, actually this whole song is chaotic. Melodically, lyrically, it sounds like they were crashing around in the studio while recording, which is very fun. The random calypso bridge bit is so....random! I like it, just a surprise in terms of musical style change. Suddenly they're the Clash! A fun way to pay homage to influences, I think. Also Carl yelling "Woo!" and then collapsing into a cough at the end is really really funny.

I can definitely hear the early-ness of Songs They Never Play On The Radio. You can tell the scaffolding is there from that early set of Libertines-to-Shambles transition songs like East Of Eden/Love Reign Over Me/Merry Go Round etc. I really really like the guitar on this one. And the vocals are so nice. Again I don't like the mix, where Peter's voice is a bit overtaken by the muddiness of the backup singers and instrumentals. But I do like this song a lot. The lyrics are pure Libertines mythology. Ahahah the dogs howling! The bit of acoustic and messing about and chat, I really like that. I think it's a really lovely ending to the album, just a glimpse of them obviously being friends and having fun. It's like a beautiful reply to the question "What became of the likely lads?"

As I've only listened through the album in full twice at this point, I'm sure my thoughts will change over time. But at the moment I think my favorite is torn between Night Of The Hunter and Baron's Claw. I Have A Friend and Songs They Never Play also are just so lyrically good. Least favorite is definitely Oh Shit. I'm excited to see which songs grow on me and in what ways.

[dabisbratz]

uh sitting on shidos lap n doing his makeup, while he has a tiight hold on ur thighs playin with em n shit. he tries to rut ur ass against his cock while you work, but you scold him for squirming around too much. he was gonna mess you up!

he tries to stay still but he just cant help it.. just the thought of having his cock in you is makin him all hard. oh well. whats a bit of smudged eyeliner to him pounding ur ass into the mattress💗

ahhhh he’s so pretty!! he already has problems sittin still, n it’s especially hard when his handsome boyfriend is a few inches from his face but… he tries his hardest for you. even if his hands are wanderin n slitherin up your shirt or down your pants. swattin him away just earns sharper, more consistent grabbin n squeezin, paired with a low n scarily serious grumble of ‘i’m not done yet.’

omgomg that last part??? shido’s a crier, he gets so lost n blissed out in it that he goes a lil manic— all erratic n rough n hard. n the whole time there’s tears in his eyes n his eyeliner n mascara starts runnin down his face, leavin behind streaky tracks. even though you’re technically on top of him, cause you’re sittin in his lap, he’s holdin your hips still n piledrivin into you from below. doesn’t help that he came untouched from grindin against you earlier— he’s still ridin that post-orgasm high so it feels so good. nyway, your complaints about his ruined eyeliner even when you’re gettin fucked within an inch of your life really spurs him on, he tells you to grab the applicator n try again as he uses you like a fleshlight since you’re so upset about it ♡

[mdhwrites]

I'd like your authorial thoughts on the following:

Given Luz' and Amity's interactions across season 1 of The Owl House could Luz be considered to have been Amity's Manic Pixie Dream Girl? If so, how do you see that trope evolving (or devolving) over the remainder of the series?

So I have a romance writing lesson I'm going to hijack this ask for but first to answer it: Probably? I feel like one could complain a lot of good romance stories use a character like this so I don't know how useful it is as a label. Not only that but a common complaint I have about Lumity is how Luz doesn't actually try to do jack shit to push back on Amity or actually question her on her shitty behavior. Like sure, we know she doesn't like Amity being mean but at best we get a single confrontation about that that Amity doesn't take seriously. It's never a problem actually addressed and Luz never tries to evoke any other life lessons out of Amity. It's why Amity feels like most of her changes just happen because "Girl pretty" because little actually pushes her to change except the mere existence of Luz.

HOWEVER

This stops HARD come S2. Even by Winging it Like Witches, we see Amity going out of her way to manage Luz's emotions and fuck ups. Where she has to be constantly accomodating because otherwise Sad Luz is a thought she just cannot fathom, even when in shit like Looking Glass Ruins, Luz seems to think an apology is enough, or how she won't change by Reaching Out about actually caring about Amity's well being (such as not noticing her girlfriend getting hurt) but also now with her breaking her word and continuing to lie to her, both things that will also come up in Thanks to Them where she's willing to lie to Amity for months before sending her to her death on the Isles without her.

This begs a bigger question: What of these two that attracted them to each other originally is still there?

We know pretty easily why Amity likes Luz. Explicitly she thinks Luz is kind, pretty, earnest, stuff like that. If we want to read into her character in S1, since it's pretty clear Amity is already crushing by Adventure in the Elements and probably started getting her feelings in Lost in Language, it's because Luz is honest with her, open and free in ways that Amity wishes she could be or wishes her family was with her. It's classic opposites attract. It also helps that early on in the show, her family seems to have transactional love while Luz seems to not require people to prove their worth to her. With Luz, she knows she's always got her heart in the right place, will make up for what she's done and Amity doesn't have to fear what Luz is thinking because if she were to ask Luz, Luz would tell her. Hell, that last part is literally what Eclipse Lake is about. Luz's openness and honesty.

Aaaaand then S2B starts with Luz keeping secrets and lying to Amity. She also steadily becomes less of a weirdo, over the entire show honestly, and more just this troublemaker who seems to mostly do things just for herself. Who can easily be manipulated through the fact that she's selfish, such as with Philip and with Eda's mother. She very easily starts ignoring other's problems because of her own, like in Reaching Out, even as she'll claim she's focusing on you but all of her actions are the exact opposite. This is how we get "I don't want to distract you," while she is willing to distract Emira while healing Amity or joins the tournament because she finds Amity being in underground witch fights that could potentially severely injure her, on a day when Luz is thinking about death and loss, as BORING. Also, instead of Amity not having to ever prove herself to Luz, to not have to worry if Luz is going to stop trusting and believing her, Luz CONSTANTLY isn't trusting or believing of Amity and so Amity keeps having to try harder and harder to make Luz happy. To manage her emotions when, you know... That is kind of the exact opposite of why Amity was probably attracted to Luz. Did she understand she'd have to save Luz from herself? Sure but not because Luz would literally lie to everyone and shirk responsibility. She expected it to be because she accepted jumping Dead Man's Gorge so one of her reading kids would stop being picked on.

So yeah, why does Amity still like Luz? I genuinely expected them to break up in Reaching Out because of this. Because Luz showed that when she's miserable, she is NOTHING like what Amity saw her as and trauma and pain is not an excuse to be a terrible person. I would have still liked them to get back together but like... Otherwise, the show ends up saying that it's okay to lie to your partner so long as you have an excuse. That is abhorrent.

(Smart, Cool, Classy)

But on the flip side of things, what about Luz? Well, we get less overt declarations from Luz than we get from Amity. By what is stated... Well, "Cotton Candy Haired Goddess" and "You're smart, classy and cool," are really all we get and that's from Knock Knock Knocking. Smart is good, cool is fine, classy is okay too but they're very vague and the one emphasized, especially over and over, is how pretty and popular Amity is. Even back in Adventure in the Elements, where the show seems to want to be when they both catch feelings proper but Luz is a dense brick, those are the traits she focuses on. How strong, cool, pretty and popular Amity is. Luz's focus seems to commonly be on very superficial elements of Amity and with her misconceptions of Amity as the series goes on, it's easy to assume these never change.

If we try to go into Luz's character though like I did with Amity though, it gets WORSE. Luz is supposedly someone who fears rejection and has been bullied in the past. However, she seems to have zero fears about Amity as a bully or her being cruel to her. Admittedly, we do get two in character reasons for this: One is from Lost in Language where she admits to wanting to befriend Amity as a fiction trope, which is GOD AWFUL... But somehow the next one is worse? In The First Day, she isn't talking about Amity but she talks about hoping to find a 'vulnerable upperclassman' like one talks about a romantic partner. As such, Amity's damage is not something to help her with but something that continues to check boxes for Luz.

BUT.

If we are kinder, she likes Amity because of opposites attract. Amity is more serious, in control and smart than Luz. She has confidence that Luz doesn't think she has (examples nonexistent of course with how little Luz gives a shit about anyone's opinion) and a grace to her the clumsy nerd does not. So if we go off of those, does Amity lose those?

Yes. In S3A she seems to not be able to control her two left feet. She shows herself to be a complete disaster much of the time. In Escaping Expulsion, she's called out for letting her grades slip and Amity just loses all of her edge and real personality. She'll still continue to do things, to have things grafted onto her but her priorities are always Luz and not any of the drive or the like that might have attracted Luz to her in the first place. This is how Reaching Out ends with Amity caring WAY MORE about Luz's actions and the like than anything her father does and with her really just wanting the right to tell her father fuck you than actually wanting to properly repair their relationship like she claims. The goal is Luz. Always.

"But Luz could see who Amity actually was and was attracted to that!"

I have heard this sort of argument too many times not to talk about it. Let's pretend that's actually the case. That Luz was attracted to a possibility, rather than the person in front of her. That "I can fix her," is a good and healthy mentality. Okay, what is the 'real' Amity then? Well, she's nice, kind of awkward but can then step up to be a badass when she has to be.

I also just described Willow and Luz is not attracted to Willow. She literally never shows attraction to anyone like that. We actually do get an idea for what her type is after all. Her first blush is with a tortured, brooding dickhead in the second episode. She blushes at the twins who are teasing and rowdy. She likes trouble. She does not get attracted to Viney or Willow though despite both having very similar personalities to what Amity will eventually have. So why does she choose Amity?

Because she's the most conventionally attractive. That appears to really be it. It's the only thing that A: Amity doesn't discard of herself and B: that Luz seems to care about that actually stays true to the character over time. And don't tell me that Amity got smart in other ways. She is not a tactician and her strategies are always the bluntest. To reference Escaping Expulsion again, she is the one who posits going for a full frontal assault. Hell, in Falls and Follies, she's making mistakes in her Spanish studies. We don't see much real intelligence from her after S1. S3 made sure she has no class and Knock Knock Knocking explicitly points out that Amity is not as cool as Luz thinks she is.

Why does this matter though? Well... Because chemistry matters in a romance? Because in fiction, we should be able to understand what in the world attracts these two people to each other? Going, "It's love, they don't have to explain it," is the exact same problem as "It's magic, I don't have to explain it." It's purely relying on suspension of disbelief and believing that just because something doesn't have to have an airtight explanation doesn't mean it doesn't have to still follow the rules or examples you have set. People HATE when magic suddenly does whatever the author needs it to just as much as they hate when someone goes "I love you" in a movie after two hours of not seeing a single reason these two would get together.

As such, if in your romance story you have the character development of your characters remove everything they found attractive about each other... Why are they still together? Not even just because that's a thing in the real world but just in the fiction. There's no reason for them not to just be friends now so why are they still saying "I love you," if they even want to be friends still? It makes the conclusion of your work not scan and so your romance falls apart.

And I mean... Clouds on the Horizon even explicitly makes this clear. In that episode, Amity uses Luz as a way to calm herself. Uses how she'd tackle things, her care and the trust she has in Luz to make her not worry about being trapped at home. But is that accurate to Luz? To Luz, who in that episode decided NOT to go save Amity because she wanted to small chance that she might be needed for the bigger plan in motion instead? Despite having no role there and potentially making their stealth mission harder? Or who goes on to not engage at all with Amity's family drama, even as Odalia threatens to force to break them up? Where is the care that Amity was drawing strength from? The silliness that attracted her to Luz? ANYTHING that was there all the way back when that pushed Amity to kiss Luz in that episode?

Because as far as I'm concerned, Amity's Manic Pixie Dream Girl didn't just become a real person. She turned to sludge and why would Amity want to date sludge? See you next tale.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[nehswritesstuffs]

Peer Review

Something about this sort of scenario seems just so Law to me and I can't really put my finger on it, even after writing it out, so here we are.

3227 words; starts off with a 19yo Law and all the self-righteous fury contained therein (Penguin is 21, Shachi 20, and Bepo 15, for comparison); I’m sure that some people have done something similar but it’s my turn with the football now I guess; may or may not work within canon, idk yet, try not to think about it too much; maybe get an additional editing pass after I sleep idk on that either

Peer Review; Law is sick of watching all of Flevance's contributions go to waste, which leads him to take drastic measures: passing board exams.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“Uh… are you sure this is a good idea…?” Penguin wondered. He watched as Law was hunched over the table in the Polar Tang’s mess hall, furiously completing paperwork. His captain did not answer him and that only made him worry more. “Cap…?”

“Ignore him,” Shachi droned from the kitchen. “You’re never going to win.”

“This is not about winning—this is about him being delusional.”

“No, what’s delusional,” Law said, slamming his pen down on the table, “is that these uptight twits playing at doctor think they can just ignore an entire plethora of medical and scientific achievements simply due to the authors getting in the crossfire of a genocide! They know they’re not publishing the truth in these fucking jokes they call medical journals! It’s like peer review means that they just skimmed it over right quick before putting it to press! If they had any shred of ethical acumen these works would be known and referenced!”

“Literally none of us have ever seen you more upset and it’s kind of scary,” Penguin mentioned. “I mean, you’re sounding like you’re about to vomit a thesaurus.”

“What I am about to vomit is the contents of my stomach because they are ignoring my parents’ work!” Law retorted. He gestured over to the wall, where a knife had been Shambled into the metal as it held up a journal that had been stabbed through the center. “I remember reading it! I was there! My parents let me read over it to check for typos! And we’re talking about one of the medical associations that turned me away as a kid!”

“Yeah, and what is passing boards going to do about it?”

“Give me an in.” Law went back to the paperwork, manically filling everything out to the best of his ability. He put together what he hoped was an impressive resume, hoping that it would be enough to convince the licensing committee to allow him to sit the boards without going through all of med school on-island first. If he was pressed, he probably could have figured out how he knew more than the average fourth-year med student by the time he was eight years old…

“Hey everyone! News Coo’s here!”

“Shit!” Law scrambled to sit up and run over to the hatch of the Polar Tang, where Bepo was waiting on the top deck. A News Coo was sitting idly on the railing, resting itself as it stared at the pile of mail in Bepo’s paw. Law took the envelopes from the Mink and began to sort through them, finding one small, discreet letter amongst ad leaflets about a WEJ news subscription and Shachi’s naughty Sora, Warrior of the Sea fan zine.

A letter from the licensing board.

Law shoved the rest of the mail back towards Bepo and tore open the envelope. He read it over three times, with his friends divvying up their own mail in the meantime.

“I got my in,” Law marveled quietly, voice barely above a whisper. He turned towards his crew—his friends—his brothers—and laughed. “I can take the exam!”

“You what…?” Shachi blinked in confusion. “What was all that paperwork for then?”

“Red tape that they want me to come in and fill out, but I already got the jump on them so they can’t pretend like it doesn’t exist.” Law put up a Room and popped the paperwork, a pen, and an envelope to the deck, replacing it with the letter and Shachi’s zine. He ignored the complaints as he put together his response and stuffed it in the envelope, putting it in the News Coo’s bag before the bird took off.

Now, it was off to Lvneel.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“You have an… interesting set of credentials,” the woman at the desk frowned. She let her eyes flit from the papers in front of her to the boy sitting on the other side of her desk. He was trying to not fidget, though it was also apparent that the attempt at looking serious was just something unfortunate his face did. Not only that, he looked so young, even if he did have patchy facial hair filling in on his chin and cheeks. So young and so unsettlingly familiar…

“All worth its weight, I can assure you,” he replied. “The gap I can explain by having worked out in the field, which I’m told is often worth as much as thrice the same amount of time in the classroom.”

“True… but without verification, I can’t really say that this is as solid as you claim, not to mention the fee…” She watched as the boy took some money from his inner jacket pocket and placed it on the table. “A bribe…?”

“All the admissions fees, up front, in your hands, now.” He stared her down as she counted it—not a beri out of place. “There is nothing barring me from taking the exam.”

“You’re feisty—I like you,” she smirked. “You’ll mostly be a pain to the other departments, which to me is honestly enough reason to let you through. You just have to remember something.”

“Anything.”

“Lvneelish people don’t take kindly to being made fools.” The boy froze, seemingly afraid he was caught in some sort of lie, and she chuckled. “I don’t know who you are, Wittman Lars, or where you really came from, but just remember that if you’re going to go through with this, then make it good. Do you understand?”

“Yes, ma’am,” the boy nodded. He looked cowed, as though he rarely deferred as such. She watched as he bit his lower lip in thought, slipping further away from the headstrong confidence that he had walked in with. “If I pass this exam, I can submit studies and critiques to the Greater Lvneel Medical Journal, right?”

“It would be within your right, yes.” She raised an eyebrow at the boy, who looked much younger in that moment than she was comfortable with. “I won’t ask your reasons, but is that why you are sitting this exam?”

His silence was all the answer she needed.

“Then get out of my office—collect the necessary paperwork on the way out.” She handed him a slip of paper with a stamp on it, which he stared at incredulously… as though he didn’t entirely believe he was holding it. “Exams are in three weeks; a failed exam can be retaken in six months. Not reporting forfeits your right to another chance for a year. Cheating bars you for five years. Any other questions will be answered by the secretaries; now leave.”

It took a moment for the boy’s brain to catch up and he scrambled up from the chair and scurried out of the office like a scared animal unsure of its limbs. She nodded to herself, wondering how many people would see in the boy what she saw—hopefully not too many.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“Three weeks?!” Penguin griped. They were in the small rented house they had found on the outskirts of the city, far enough away from the main of Lvneel to not attract too much attention. Shachi was already getting dinner prepped while Bepo was helping Law sort through medical books at the kitchen table. The eldest Heart Pirate had just gotten home with the shopping when Law dropped the news on him.

“That’s when it is; can’t change it,” Law replied. “I’m surprised the registrar let me do any of it at all.”

“This is going to eat into our savings, you know this,” Penguin frowned. Shachi wordlessly took the bag from his hand and procured the seal meat that was going to be the night’s dinner. “We don’t have that much.”

“I thought the haul we got from those Kueni assholes was more than enough to let us coast for half a year in a more central part of town,” Law reminded him. Penguin only folded his arms in response. “Besides, it’ll do us good to be on land for a bit, and the Tang’s not that far away if you want to visit her.”

“She’s a ship, not a woman.”

“Yeah, but same rules apply.” Law opened a Room and moved a fresh stack of books to a nearby shelf. “We’re going to be here long enough for me to sit the exam and get a hold of my certification. If it takes that long, then it’s going to take that long.”

“You’re fucking nuts if you think we’re going to stay under the radar the entire time.”

“Then it’s a good thing I don’t.” Law handed Bepo a book and pointedly did not look at Penguin. “I think she recognized me.” His crewmates all stopped to stare at him in horror.

“Wait, what?!” Shachi snapped. “Cap, don’t tell me you’re going to get us all busted because of this!”

“We won’t,” Law assured. “They can’t prove anything, not until it’s too late, and once I get my license they can’t strip me of it unless a malpractice suit comes up against me or there’s an injunction, both of which take time.”

“It’s bad enough Bepo’s a bear—don’t apologize Bep—but someone recognizing you?!” Shachi put his hands on his hips while their kid brother whimpered. “We’re literally hundreds of miles from Flevance. Why do you think this lady recognized you?!”

“Just a feeling,” he shrugged. “People travel for work or pleasure; medical tourism was a thing where I grew up; I’ve got a Flevench face—any number of reasons.”

“For fuck’s sake…”

“I told you,” Penguin said, gesturing at Law as though he wanted to add a “see this shit” at the end.

“Then leave,” Law deadpanned. He handed another book to Bepo, who put it in the appropriate stack. “Nothing’s stopping you. The door’s right there.”

“Yeah, but why would we leave Bepo alone with you?” Penguin scoffed. “He needs an adult.”

“I am an adult.”

“Tch; barely.”

“…and whose idea was it to beat the bear up?”

Okay, he had them there, but…!

“Are you going to hang that over us forever?” Shachi groaned.

“As long as I need to.”

“Then I say I should be able to hold my arm over you in retaliation,” Penguin sniffed. Law simply acted as though he hadn’t heard his eldest crewmate, continuing with sorting his study materials. “It still gets tingly, you know.”

“That’s because you probably have carpal tunnel, not because of anything I did,” Law replied dully. “I’d fix it for you if you let me near your arm next time you experience localized paresthesia.”

Penguin and Shachi exchanged an exasperated look before looking at Bepo, who shrugged helplessly. The sooner they could get their captain off this rock, the sooner he’d be less of a dick, they supposed.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

While the crankiness that the Hearts dealt with as Law was studying for his exam was unbearable, the exam itself was even worse. Law sat in the large room with dozens of other applicants; it was warm and stuffy and smelled like burnt coffee and body odor. He was the youngest person in the room by-far, which was something that he knew others noticed. The uncomfortable feeling of eyes on him raked against the young man as he sat at his seat and readied himself alongside all the other candidates. He knew that not only was he not someone who had been through courses with everyone else there, but he looked different—like his father—and there had to be at least a few people in the room aware enough to put two and two together. The Doctors Trafalgar had both done plenty of talks on neighboring islands, after all.

In both an instant and forever, the exam was done. The room was made to put down their pens and Law began to panic, knowing there was too much test left. He put all the papers in order in their folder and handed them in despite his nerves. Before he realized it, the teen was vomiting in the bushes outside of the university hall, Penguin and Shachi holding onto him while Bepo wrung his paws in distress.

“What the fuck has you like this, Cap?” Shachi wondered as Law finished dry-heaving. The younger man was still shaking unsteadily within his grasp.

“I… I couldn’t finish the test,” he croaked, voice raw. “They kept staring at me… and I couldn’t even finish…”

“Maybe they design it so no one finishes?” Bepo offered.

“That doesn’t help,” Law moaned. He stood up and weakly shook off Penguin and Shachi. Neither of them backed away, which he took in stride. “I still just sat an exam I didn’t finish—I always finish my exams.”

“Last time you finished an exam you were ten,” Penguin reminded him.

“Nuns don’t make it easy,” Law reasoned as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. Something sat in the pit of his stomach, seeped into his empty stomach and weary heart, and he frowned. Fuck… of all the things… “I don’t think I passed.”

“Can’t you retake it?” Bepo asked.

“In six months,” Law replied, “and I don’t want to stick around that long. We can’t afford it.”

“We’ll get there when we get there,” Penguin assured. “Now, what are we going to have for dinner? I’m fucking starved.”

Law laughed awkwardly as his friends began to discuss their dinner options, thinking that his sitting of the boards exam was cause for celebration. He allowed himself to be dragged along to the celebration, despite not feeling much like partying or eating, and spent the entire rest of the day and into the evening trying to calm himself down the best he could.

‘They know,’ he kept on thinking. He felt hyper-aware of everything—of everyone—as they sat in a pub with food and beer for the rest of the night. Bepo even had his first drink, much to the bear’s disgust, and provided the other two goobers with entertainment that lasted for hours.

“C’mon, Cap,” Shachi chuckled, his words on the verge of slurring. Law had lost count of how many beers any of them had, yet it was not enough for him to not cringe as his crewmate threw his arm over his shoulder and leaned in. “You gotta loosen up at some point tonight.”

“I don’t really feel like it,” Law replied for what was likely the dozenth time. “I don’t even really want to be here.”

“I don’t either,” Bepo squeaked. “I feel sick.”

“You barely finished your pint!” Penguin scolded.

“I’m sorry! It just tastes so gross!”

“Your first few pints are supposed to be gross.”

“I don’t think how it’s supposed to go…”

“Ah, we’ll make a man out of you yet,” Penguin scoffed. He looked at Law over the rim of his mug and shrugged. “Eat something; you look like you’re going to pass out.”

“No.”

“I don’t really think it counts as mutiny if I act for the good of the captain,” he reminded him. Law rolled his eyes and busied himself with one of the whale fritters that were still on the table. “Good. Now, what are we going to do about those bounty hunter-looking types across the room that have been eyeing us for about an hour?”

Okay, it made him feel a little better that it wasn’t just something that had buried its way into only his brain. He watched as both Penguin and Shachi went and stood, the pair deciding to let their captain and navigator sit this one out—they had to take care of the kids somehow, and this was something they definitely knew how to do even when drunk as they were.

Law went and Shambled some takeaway boxes to the table—he was not letting whale fritters, fries, and Flevench-style croquettes go to waste because the idiots got into some trouble.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Three days passed by slowly. Painfully. It almost made Law go completely mad. He sat in their rented house the entire time, pacing the floor. When he wasn’t pacing, he was bouncing his leg as he sat, or tossing and turning on his bed, or just being restless in general. It was enough to make his crew crazy, almost wishing they had waited out the results while on the Polar Tang. In fact, Bepo had to sit on Law in order to keep him from rushing to the door when the mail courier arrived, leaving Penguin to get it and Shachi open the envelope.

It didn’t matter one way or the other—he passed.

…he passed, but with a caveat.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“I NEED A STAMP! DOES ANYONE HAVE A STAMP?!”

Law’s shouting fell on deaf ears as the rest of the Hearts rested on the beach of the island they were docked at. He needed just one more to take care of the Coo fee and it seemed as though his reserves had run dry. At least it seemed as though the News Coo was taking advantage of the delay, the bird relaxing in the sun of the Summer Island’s Spring.

“DOES ANYONE HAVE A STAMP?” he repeated, doing his best to allow his voice to carry. No one paid him any heed; there was plenty to do with their time on land that facilitated the accidental ignoring of their captain. Sunbathing, volleyball, splashing in the water, setting up for the night’s big barbecue/bonfire… it was looking as though the crew was going to have a great afternoon on the tiny spit of an island they were resting on.

Except, suddenly, Law opened a Room and swapped his crewmates with a bunch of barnacles that had not yet been scraped off the top overdeck, dropping everyone rather unceremoniously onto the wooden planks.

“Ow! Hey! What’d you do that for?!” Ikkaku snapped.

“Since no one listened to me the first time, I had to resort to drastic measures,” Law reasoned. “Does anyone have a stamp? The Coo’s waiting.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, I got it,” Clione griped. He went below deck, returning to the rest of the crew being back on land as he held a postage stamp towards his captain. Law took it and attached it to the front of the thick, buff-colored envelope along with four others before offering it to the News Coo. The bird regarded it sourly before squawking in resignation, allowing Law to put it in his bag. “What’s it about this time, Captain?”

“Vitamin D intake in correlation to heavy metal poisoning’s effects on the Human body,” Law explained as the Coo flapped off. “I needed so many stamps because I included two copies.”

“One by Trafalgar Law about Amber Lead and…?”

“…one by Doctor Wittman Lars about arsenic and mercury,” he admitted. “I don’t think the case study about Jean Bart’s tinea pedis and its correlation to his days in captivity is ready yet; still needs some refining in regards to outlining the causation.”

“The entire world isn’t ready for Jean Bart’s feet; subjecting Lvneel to it is just plain cruel,” Clione shuddered. “The snail photos you had me take still haunt my nightmares.”

“Be glad you weren’t around for the Bed Bugs or Mange Debacle,” Law reminded him. Clione nodded silently in reply—all he wanted from that was the stories and he didn’t even really want those.

[morticious-delicious]

I finished Poor Things (book by Alisdair Gray) last night after having watched Poor Things (movie dir. Yorgos Lanthimos) this weekend and I am not ok.

The movie: Beautiful to watch, a little extra with the sexi-times, and full of obscenities. (I'm not afraid of the word Fuck but ... FUCK it was excessive! And a little out of character!) I understand that much of the movie was Bella finding the freedom to be herself and do and fuck whom she wanted, I get it. But its all alluded to in the book. We don't have scene after scene of Ruffalos sweaty dad bod. There is no mention of her learning how to use breakfast foods in new and creative ways or assaulting the maid.

(spoilers)

The book has a few parts: The account by McCandless, and then an account by Bella "Victoria" Baxter where she laments the bogusness of his account! She's like holy shit he's a great doctor but has no imagination! He stole from Mary Shelley, He stole from Poe (and a number of other Gothic authors). Basically-

NONE of the story they show in the movie was supposed to have happened. I mean, like, even in the story not like, its fiction. Even in spite of the author throwing in historical tidbits after wards that make it all sound real and true. She runs away from her abusive husband! She moves in with Godwin and loves him for being the only fucking doctor in the UK who is caring to lady patients! She marries McCandless because he's a gentle man who will not try and control her! She LOVES Godwin (who also does not try and control her!) None of the Frankenstein stuff happens! She becomes a doctor and a socialist and has a life thats not quite the adventure they show, but I see what he was trying to do.

The complaints about "She's a baby in a womans body!" Yes! Notice how the men LOVE her when shes infantile and then grow tried of her when she starts thinking and having ideas! (also maturing at an accelerated rate).

She's still a fascinating character but not the manic pixie hmm hmm hmm they show in the movie. If anything she reminds me more of Mattie from True Grit. No nonsense. She does what needs to be done and what she wants! Still interesting but would have made for a less interesting movie.

anyway I'm reeling from this. It reminded me of Blonde. A fictional account of a real person and then they make a movie that shows a lot more sex then was actually in the original piece. Only Bella/Victoria (Beautiful Victory!) wasn't real so I am 100% more ok with it. Anyway. Good movie Good book. I need to lay down. I need men to stop re-writing women.

[manicali]

I would be so damn good at English class if I gave a fuck about anything.

Literally every project it’s either “How do you empathize with this?” .

Like sorry, no I actually don’t care, I barely have empathy for people I hold dear to my heart, I don’t care about this obviously staged photo or poorly written short story. Making up reasons to care is haaard.

[azlan-snow]

Humble Beginnings(Radiobelle Fanfic)

Chapter Fourteen: Worst Nightmare

(Told from Al’s POV)

A month  and a half has passed since Charlie’s unconsciousness befell her. And we have been busy. I assumed Charlie’s position as hotel manager and co-founder, resulting in busy days, sleepless nights, and never ending complaints. But everyday, I would work in our room, making sure to watch over my beloved. And today was the day she awoke.

“ugh,” Charlie groans, awaking for the first time in a while.

“Charlie!” I rush to her side as she attempts to sit up, and help her as she continues groaning in pain. “Be careful, mon cher.”

“Alastor?”

“Yes, Charlie? I’m right here.”

“What….happened?”

“You were injured severely. I’ve been tending to you since.”

Charlie’s stomach growls loudly, as if it’s begging for food. 

“Are you hungry, beloved?”

“I think so.”

“I’ll get you some food. Wait for me here.” I teleport down to the lobby, grab some pasta Angel made for dinner last night, and return to Charlie searching her body.

“Woman, don’t you know how to keep your clothes on?” 

“Sorry. I just wanted to see.” She slips her shirt back on before I hand her food.

“It feels like I’ve been out for a day or so.”

“A day or so?”

“Yeah.”

“Charlie, you’ve been in a coma for a month and a half.” Dead silence arose from that mere sentence as Charlie stares at me, coldness lying there dormant and withholding in her eyes.”

“Are you telling me that I’ve been unconscious. For. Almost. Two. Months!” Horns sprouting from her head,she began to look furious before coughing manically. As her coughing becomes more like hackling, fear begins to overtake her entirety, and her vision begins to fade. “Charlie! Stay with me!” I hold her steady as her body begins to spasm, slowly becoming more and more rapid. I hold her steady, making sure she doesn’t get injured. As it begins to calm down, the fog over Charlie’s eyes begins to fade. “Are you okay, mon cher?”

“No.” She pouts, frowning in her puppy-like face. Then, a knock on the door.

“Hey Al, we need somma’ ya voodoo type shit down-” Angel pauses, seeing Charlie, awake. “The fuck Al? Why didnt’cha tell us she was awake and kickin’?” Angel walks over to the foot of the bed, motioning for Charlie to come closer. Charlie scoots over towards him and hugs him, Angel wrapping all four of his arms around her. MY heart hurts at such a gesture towards someone that’s not me. Charlie might have been right. I am a possessive lover. But for good reason. 

As Angel and Charlie chatted about what happened in her absence, I watched from her side, making sure she doesn’t spoil her biggest surprise: a new resident. He hasn’t been here long, and clicking with him, as Charlie would say, has been proving to be difficult. The ladies and Angel scare him greatly. Especially Cherri, who came to stay here after Angel convinced her that it would be good for her. Charlie has yet to meet the two, only hearing what Angel says about the explosive woman. “Perhaps I should assist you, Angel.”

“Thanks. I don’t even know what happened.” Angel and I leave Charlie for a short while before we went down to solve our problem: A massive hole in the wall. “They said it was there this morning.”

“Intriguing. It just appeared?”

“Yep.” I cast a spell, trying to find any residual traces and find an explosive residue lying on the outer rim.

“It would appear as if someone threw a bomb at it.” We all look at Cherri, who looks hurt that we’re blaming her.

“It wasn’t me, aight! I was out on the town!”

“Then what could it-” I heard a loud thud, coming from Charlie’s room. “Hold that thought.” I portal to our room and see Charlie: wings out, hooves sticking up, and body,flatly lined up on the floor. 

“Charlie. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” she answered, muffling her speech with the floor. I help her up, dusting her off and straightening her up. “What possessed you to leave the bed?”

“I don’t want to be in here, rotting like a corpse.” I laugh at her metaphor of murder before speaking again. 

“Mon cher. You are in no condition to be roaming about, even healed. I highly advise against such a choice.”

“Who died and made you my dad,” she remarks sarcastically, rolling her eyes while doing so.

“Your father tasked me with your care while he dealt with political problems with the rings. Your mother is trying to negotiate with Heaven to assist with your hotel.”

“Really? They’re doing all that?” Charlotte expressed a look of appreciation towards my explanation, meaning I did my job correctly. 

“That doesn’t justify you want to keep me here.”

“Charlotte. I am not going to risk your safety. NOT again.”

“Al. I’m not in danger anymore. I’m safe here. With you.” She takes my hand in hers, squeezing tightly with reassurance.

“Charlotte. What happened that day?” She winced at the question, hoping I wouldn’t ask.

“I was attacked. With angelic weapons.” “And?”

“That’s it.”

“There’s still the question of who, darling.”

“That’s for me to know and for you and everyone to find out when I’m ready to disclose such info.”

“Charlotte. Please. I want to know who hurt you. They deserve punishment worse than I can deliver.”

“Later. Now, I’m going downstairs. And you can’t stop me.” She rushes out of the room with great haste, with me hot on her tail. She greets the stairs with too much speed and nearly falls, my tentacle catching her right before impact. 

“This is exactly why I said you weren’t permitted to leave.”  

“Charlie!” Niffty runs toward her, helping her right herself on the bottom of the stairs, before hugging her tightly on the shin. The others surround her in a large hug, embracing their once lost friend. As they hug, I notice the plethora of gifts, cards and balloons from other rings that have accumulated in a certain corner of the main lobby.  

“Charlie. We gotta surprise fo’ ya’,” Angel pronounces, dragging her over out of the hug.

“This is Cherri, my friend that I was talkin’ to ya about.” Cherri looks at her with her singular eye, grinning greatly.

“Aye mate! Nice to finally meet’cha, Princess.” Charlie looks ecstatic at the new guest as she hugged her. 

“She’s not the only one. This is Ren, Charlie,” Husk grumbles, dragging the boy from behind him. Charlotte’s grin grew even wider as she approached him and extended her hand for him to shake, only to be turned down as he hid behind Husker.

“We talked about this yesterday, kid. You can't be afraid of girls anymore. Or Angel,” Husker explains.

“Even Niffty?”

“Nah, you can be scared of her. Hell, I am.” 

Niffty cackled at his remark before returning her signature toothy grin.

“Ren. Why are you here? Not that I’m not happy you’re here. I’m ecstatic. Just curious about your reason for seeking redemption.

“My sister,” he whispers, barely audible to us. “His sister. She’s in Heaven,” Husk echoes, making sure that Charlie gets the message.

“That’s great! You want to reunite with your family!”

Suddenly, a burst comes through the door, displaying the King and Queen.

“Hello your-” I begin. They rush over to the both of us, take us by the shoulder and embrace us, squeezing tight. 

“You’re awake!” The king turns to me, eyes glowering in frustration. “How long has she been awake?”

“Not long, your Majesty.”

“Any info?”

“None. She refuses to talk about it.”

“Not for long.” 

Lucifer walks towards her, hugs Charlotte, then speaks. 

“Charlotte Morningstar.” She looked up at him, having never heard her full name from him before. 

“You need to tell us what happened. No prancing around the subject. Just the truth. Please.”

“Dad, I-”

“Charlie. The truth. I’m not asking this just because you are my daughter, but because someone crossed a line hurting a member of royalty. So please. Just tell us.”

“We’re your parents, too, Charlie. And your our daughter. Seeing you hurt was devastating. Something like that should not happen.”

“Mom. Everything���s fine. But fine. I’ll tell you.”

“Thank you.”

“If I may, your Majesties, can we take this somewhere more…private?”

“Of course.” I lead us to our room, where we sit Charlie in the bed and us three around it before Charlotte began. 

“I was headed to Cannibal Town to see Al.”  She looks at me, expression softening. “But I never even reached the gates. Some dude grabbed me, stuffed me in a sack and took me somewhere. The voices were constant and ringing. There was smoke everywhere. So much that it hurt to breathe. They stabbed, shot, burned, and slashed until they were finished before releasing me. Next thing I know, waking up in the hotel today.”

“Charlie. I’m not understanding,” Lucifer exclaims, confused. 

“Charlotte, you woke up once before today,” I say, revealing a small known fact. “I did?”

“Indeed. You regained consciousness whilst I tended to your wounds. You mumbled a few words before slipping back.”

“Okay. Anything useful?”

“No, milady.”

“Okay. So what do we do now?”

“Your mother and I are going to figure out who did this.”

“But Dad, don’t you have work to do?”

“I do. But work can wait. You, Charlie, are my top priority. As my daughter, you will always take priority to me more than anything.”

“I know, Dad. And I’m thankful. But it’s not necessary. I can manage on my own. I have this far, I can continue.”

“We know, but we’re still worried. Maybe you should stay in the palace with us. Both of you.” She looks at me, warmth filling her face.

“You have found love, Charlie. I will never intend to separate you from him, so long as he doesn’t hurt you.”

“A gracious offer, your Majesty, but I think we would both prefer to reside here at the hotel. Charlotte believes this is where she belongs.”

“Do not speak on behalf of my Daughter, sinner. Know your place.”

“Don’t talk to my boyfriend like that, Dad. Alastor is telling the truth. I don’t want to go back to the palace.”

“Very well. If that is your decision, we will abide by it.” They get up to leave, wishing Charlie a speedy recovery, but as they leave, the Queen pulled me aside. 

“I need a favor from you, Alastor.”

“Oh? And what might that be, my Queen?”

“To help Charlie heal.” She lays a hand on my head before murmuring something in what I am guessing to be an ancient demonic dialect. A warm glow emits from her hand, tracing a small emblem on the small spot in between my ears and antlers. 

“I have given you a small portion of my healing abilities to assist Charlie. Use it to the best of your abilities. And take this,” she explains, summoning a dial phone, and handing it to me. “If you or Charlotte ever need to reach me, use that, especially about the wretch who hurt her. I do plan on exile and torment if that is suitable. Understood?”

“Of course, My Queen. Safe tidings.”

“To you as well.” She leaves, and I return to Charlie, who wants to see her parents off.

But when Charlie approaches Ren again, the King swooshes her away, and the Queen, grabbing me and taking us both to the palace, where we see Valentino, the Moth Demon, tied up in front of them. I instantaneously become furious and glare at him, malicious intent in my eyes. And so the interrogation begins.

*teehee*

[blasphemecel]

Mayuri Kurotsuchi ― Truce

PAIRING: Mayuri Kurotsuchi/Reader WORD COUNT: 2.6k TYPE: Crackfic WARNING: Some NSFW jokes NOTE: Note: This is the same reader character as Thorn In Your Side, but you can read it without reading the first one

Someone left a note for Kurotsuchi Mayuri outside of office hours, which was impressive considering he worked until late at night. Whoever it was must've been very adamant not to cross paths with him and relay the message verbally. He examined the envelope with visible boredom, toying with the edges.

It was possible this came from the Captain Commander. Only Yamamoto was ancient enough for it to be reasonable to write a letter instead of contact Mayuri through the computer system, but then again, he was among cavemen. It could've been something the brute Zaraki asked the toddler to write for him (obviously, he had to be illiterate).

After he ripped the wrapping, Mayuri realized this was not Yamamoto's handwriting, though the paper had been folded and the words in the upper right corner brought a smile to his face.

Kuchiki, Byakuya Division 6, Captain Letter of Complaint Subject: [L/n] [Y/n], Division 12, Unseated Officer

Amazing. You could get in huge trouble for whatever transgression you committed against him. It was also nice to know you had become the bane of someone else's existence for once. The excitement at the prospect of having an excuse to fire you could've been enough to give him a boner on a bad day. Mayuri controlled his movements like he was trying to prolong the moment before he opened a long-awaited present, manic grin widening with every passing beat.

Dear Captain Kurotsuchi,

I would like to know how you have allowed that waste of a Shinigami to happen?

Whatever happiness Mayuri may have been feeling vanished. His eye twitched.

That snob Byakuya had some nerve using this as his opening line, addressing him in such an insolent manner. Maybe this was why he was an embarrassment to his clan, because he said shit like this. And... an unexpected defensiveness came over him. Sure, he had called you worse, but that was between you and him. Considering Byakuya's lieutenant was about as smart as a bag of rocks, Mayuri did not want to hear his criticisms of you.

Perhaps it was hypocritical since he had been excited to read all about it earlier, but he found it wasn't half as satisfying as he had imagined. Definitely nothing to jizz about. Regardless, he had to continue.

What were you thinking, letting an unseated officer prance around psychoanalyzing people?

Okay, Mayuri did not let you do that. It was one of those things you went off to do on your own, like usual. But that was part of the game, which Byakuya didn't understand since he seemed to be a moron or because he didn't care, but either way Mayuri disliked that the blame for your horrid behavior fell on him.

He was a man of research, however, and because of this, curiosity about what you had said to prompt this plagued him.

Surely if you had disciplined the fool properly, they would know they have no right to speak to me in that way. A District 72 runt of no standing to a captain such as myself, nonetheless.

There was the obligatory nobleman drivel. Though he found it interesting how you had pissed off Byakuya enough that he went and dug into your background. Mayuri scratched his chin.

This was a misunderstanding of your character. Mayuri had 'put you in your place' many times throughout the centuries you had known each other. It was just that it accomplished nothing. Since you were both dedicated scientists, things changed over the years, of course, since stagnancy wasn't beneficial. But something that wasn't prone to evolution was your audacity. Again, the notion that Mayuri tolerated you without repercussions was insulting.

And you knew you had 'no right' to say whatever you had said to Byakuya, probably. It didn't stop you from doing so, was all.

It disgusts me to type this out or think about it again, but nevermind. Needless to say, I don't appreciate being told that I am 'frustrated (in a vulgar manner of sorts) because of my self-inflicted vow of celibacy' and other such presumptuous things. Especially from the likes of that person.

I would hereby like to request [L/n] [Y/n]'s expulsion. I think it is a reasonable punishment for the level of disrespect I endured. Thank you in advance.

Regards, Kuchiki Byakuya

'Regards'? Bastard.

Then again, this went to prove Captain Kuchiki really was not an expert judge of character. Mayuri would sooner swallow acid (which he did sometimes whenever he was in the mood for developing a new unnecessarily potent drug) than let somebody boss him around. Maybe Byakuya's wish would have come true if he hadn't worded it like this. He moved his creepy chin-scratching down to his neck and stuck out his tongue, and his eyes darted around in different directions.

Yes, there was only one way to deal with this.

___

Your latest venture was therapy, so you set up office hours and everything.

You were one of the few people from Division Twelve who ever saw the sun more than once a month. Though Mayuri didn't like this 'going outside' thing you tended to do since it prevented him from supervising you, he never sent out someone to track you since that was similar to admitting defeat, and he never went looking for you because you thrived on negative attention. And, really, he had better things to do.

Then there was his method of surveying. When word got out he had set up cameras everywhere, it turned into a discussion about HR violations, since a lot of his subordinates filed complaints about it because he scared them shitless. His ability to monitor them when he wasn't in the immediate vicinity had disconcerted them. The Gotei 13 held a meeting about it, but then it turned in a two-hour debate during which Mayuri insisted that the other Captains were morons for not doing the same as him, and the matter never got settled.

After this, you called him a 'peeping Tom' and Mayuri publically denounced you as a degenerate. But that was beside the point and wasn't even the first time he had done so.

Since no one elected themselves as a subject to your counseling, you decided to satisfy your curiosity by forcing your therapy onto someone. Not that everybody avoided your services because you were stupid. Some people suspected you had so many screws loose because you knew so much you went crazy.

Mostly, the problem was that whatever you had planned was guaranteed to be unpleasant.

Byakuya was a skilled captain, so he considered himself competent enough to know when he's being followed, but this kind of stalking was different. For one, it was not very subtle.

"Hello, Captain Kuchiki," you said while saluting him.

Byakuya didn't answer, instead opting to keep walking.

"Hi," you tried again. "Hello."

He halted. Humoring you never fared well for anyone, but he figured if he spared you a few seconds, you would get bored and leave, so he turned and looked at you with steely eyes. Your smile did not waver.

When Byakuya was in a bad mood, he went outside and brooded while looking at the cherry blossoms. You had noticed that during your daily patrols around the Seireitei grounds. It was a bit auto-fellating, but you weren't here to judge. That wasn't what therapy was about.

You raised your hand and asked, "You and Captain Zaraki haven't been getting along, right?"

"We never get along," he said.

At this, you whipped out a scrapbook and a pen, and scribbled something. "It's been worse. Why's that?"

Levelly, he said, "I don't see how my personal affairs concern you."

"My observations tell me his vast bosom distracts you. That's no good for a captain, so of course I'm concerned." There was mock pity in your tone.

Appalled by what he just heard, Byakuya rose an eyebrow. Like he would ever look at that barbarian's 'bosom,' even if it was, in fact, huge. Maybe willingly poisoning yourself over and over was messing with your head. Apparently you took his silence as a cue to continue because then you said,

"And you've been angsting by the trees more than usual. It points to feelings of betrayal and self-loathing." That was how you interpreted his behavior after you gathered information from some books in the library, at least. Division Twelve didn't have a psychology department, and you were seeking to change that, but Captain Kurotsuchi had told you to get lost, and that it'd be more suitable for Squad Four, and blah blah blah. So now you have turned it into everyone else's problem.

He did not know how you gathered that from his vacant stare at some plants, or even how long you had been at this, but then he remembered the therapy poster you had put up all over the hallways. That was a few months ago.

"It's in your best interest to keep quiet," Byakuya advised. Captain Kurotsuchi also said this to you many times, in less refined language, but what was in your best interest never entertained you, so you pressed the issue.

"You don't need to take out your guilt on Captain Zaraki," you said. "He doesn't understand. It's not helping."

Again, Byakuya did not dignify that with a response, but his stare bore into you harder. Good, so he was listening. It seemed your expertise had rendered him speechless. This could only be a sign for you to keep going,

"Have you considered your celibacy is making you unpleasant?"

"What?"

"Like, your sexual frustration because of your fifty year long dry spell? It's making you irritable."

"What."

"Abarai is having a terrible time, Captain, I can tell."

Byakuya tensed his jaw and reached for his sword, though he didn't know if he could justify this kill in a report. Maybe he should leave the job to Kurotsuchi instead? At least he could pass it off as an accident during an experiment or something. You smiled, and it was unnerving because he couldn't anticipate what other horrible thing you could say.

He figured his best course of action was leaving and you wrote 'DENIAL' in your scrapbook. Then, before he could escape out of earshot range, you asked, "Are you not coping with bisexuality well, Captain Kuchiki?"

He shunpo'd to the other side of the Seireitei. You considered this a job well-done because Byakuya would probably need real therapy after this conversation, and maybe if he demanded for it, someone would consider making a suitable department somewhere.

___

"We need to talk."

You ignored Captain Kurotsuchi and continued typing up the report you needed to do, which provoked him into yanking you by the shoulder.

"I said we need to talk," he ordered.

"Oh, you're so desperate for my attention," you said in a shrill voice which usually made him mad, but this time he brushed it off. You tapped your chin curiously at his unusual behavior and he led the way since apparently he thought he was above providing an explanation.

While you stood in front of him in his laboratory, Mayuri reached for something crumpled on his desk and unfurled it. "I received this," he said, and you leaned closer to squint your eyes and try to read it. You skimmed it and noticed that he had been nice enough to underline 'I would hereby like to request [L/n] [Y/n]'s expulsion.' with red in case you somehow missed it.

A grin split your face and you pretended to be sheepish and wrung your hands together behind your back. "You know, I didn't expect him to be so sensitive about it," you said. "I mean, I know his wife's dead, but it's been fifty years, right?"

Mayuri didn't care about Byakuya's melodrama, and neither did you, since you were being so callous about it. So at least neither of you needed to address that. And your sad attempts at matchmaking a widowed man wasn't something he knew about, so you could shift the focus of the conversation.

"Ya think he's gonna need therapy after all that?"

"Not this again," said Mayuri. "Now that Captain Kuchiki, whose mental health I don't care about, has written me this letter, there's only one logical course of action."

"And that is?" You batted your eyelashes. "You're not letting me go, are you?"

Mayuri massaged his temples. "Could you stop being a pest for five seconds? I know it's hard for you to ignore your innate desire to be the most annoying creature on the planet since you have no sense of self-regulation-"

"See, I read about that in the psychology books. They claim I'm hedonistic."

"-but I'm trying to give you a promotion here."

When he said this, you both examined each other thoroughly for a few seconds. After a long bout of silence, you burst out into laughter and Captain Kurotsuchi ground his teeth together into his usual lunatic smile before he threw away Byakuya's note in the trash bin.

Only you and him would find rewarding a request for expulsion with a promotion funny.

Between making out in various attempts to drug one another, the many foiled assassination plans on both sides, and the brief time you spent as liquid in a labeled jar, you did not expect messing with Captain Kuchiki would be all it took to quell your hundreds of years long feud with Mayuri. Of course, the truce was only temporary since you loved to hate each other. Still, it was... sort of progress.

"Maybe I should piss off Captain Zaraki and make it to nineteenth seat."

Mayuri snarled, "Don't push it, I'm just being generous today." Besides, the more he thought about it, the less likely it was that both Kenpachi and the toddler could write a letter even if they collaborated. Sleep deprivation must have influenced his first imagining of the scenario.

___

Word of your promotion traveled, which made people question if you and Captain Kurotsuchi had 'squashed the beef,' which was jargon the talented hero Kurosaki Ichigo introduced to Soul Society, since he had refused to acknowledge your abilities before this. The rumor was something you and Mayuri strategically spread, so Byakuya would find out because what you had in common (pettiness) usually tore you apart, but this time, it united you.

"It's like a sadomasochistic relationship," said Matsumoto, who found your eternal fighting with your captain hilarious. She loved when you guys argued in public. It was the best drama this job offered, which was also a little sad.

"No. Sadosadistic," Yumichika corrected, which made Matsumoto cheer, since it sounded even more amusing and dysfunctional. Though he had also coined it a few seconds ago, so maybe there was a term that was more applicable. He was also the most adamant in his agenda that the two of you were somehow romantically involved. Ever since the moment during which you gave Mayuri pink eye by grazing his eyeballs with your lashes, and the comment he made about it that traumatized Nemu and Akon, he had been convinced this was the case.

Maybe Nemu and Akon could be exhibits in your argument about opening a psychology department? Yes, splendid. Thank god Yumichika went and ruined their day that one time.

Ikkaku didn't know why he was even listening to this conversation. Perhaps he enjoyed the opportunity to ogle Yumichika and Matsumoto simultaneously, but that didn't require listening. So he tuned them out.

[03junkie]

something has been written. I’m feeling extra in my feels today, so this is the product of that. Also CW: alcohol and recreational drug use

Midnight is truly when Barty and Evan come to life. Where the day is slow, somber and lazy, it’s the hours of the Devil when they actually enjoy life. They turn on every light in the house, and turn up the volume on their speakers. Noise complaints were frequent, but they were both rich enough to pay for the soundproofing of their neighbours’ house. Their own house? No, they didn’t care enough to alter their own home for a bunch of sensitive pricks.

Barty put on music, some rendition of Russian EDM that Evan had grown up with, owing to the fact that they’ve been around each other since they could talk. Initially, Evan hated the sound of it, but slowly, he got a taste for it. When his friends would insult the pair’s taste in music, Evan would jump to defend themselves, saying that the group of them were just too inferior to understand good music.

Being friends for about twenty years, and a couple for five, they had seen each other through all sorts of times, good, bad, ugly. Somewhere along the road of finding comfort in each other’s beds, they both had fallen hard. The kind of falling one could only dream of; crashing and burning and soaring all at the same time.

Along the years, the both of them had taken to vice. It’d been a long time coming, after escaping their houses for each other. They’d made enough of a name for themselves in the world; Barty wrote, and Evan sang. With whatever little fame they had, they’d made a near-perfect life for themselves.

Now, almost ritualistically, Evan was pulling out two crystal glasses (a housewarming gift from Reg and James), and pulling out the stopper on the decanter filled with whiskey.

“You know I’m trying to reduce alcohol, любимый,” Barty slung an arm across Evan’s shoulder, pressing a kiss to the side of his head. As a force of habit, Evan couldn’t help the blush settling on his cheeks.

“You’re no fun when you’re sober.” Evan jutted his lower lip out almost cartoonishly. Barty gave him a long, languid look, before sighing. He reached out for the glass settled on the counter, and drank in one gulp. He didn’t even flinch as the liquid went down. Barty poured another one for himself, and drank that as swiftly as the first.

Evan smiled, and watched as Barty moved across the room rhythmically, turning the volume up higher. Evan turned to his own glass. He preferred to drink slower, because he tended to get drunk faster than Barty. Barty had been drinking since he was thirteen, but it wasn’t a problem. He knew he could stop whenever he wanted, and he didn’t want to stop right now. The couple’s friends were concerned for Barty, but Evan always shut them down saying that he knew what was best for Barty.

“Baby, can you change the song? Это скучно.” Barty yelled from their bedroom. Evan obliged, and a very familiar melody filled the walls of their house. He heard Barty whoop in delight.

“That’s what I’m talking about!” He walked out of the room, eyelids painted with blue glitter, and a feather boa ‘round his neck. Evan laughed, not unkindly, but because he was lucky to be with someone so beautiful. Barty reached for the whiskey once again, but stopped before pouring it. “We have tequila, да?”

“Behind the other bottles on the second shelf.” Barty grinned at him, a manic quirk of the lips with something glinting in his eyes.

“You bought the expensive shit?” Evan nodded, swallowing part of his drink.

“I knew you wanted it, so I bought it.” He shrugged. Barty jumped up to his feet and ambushed Evan into a breath-restricting hug. He kissed both his cheeks a couple times.

“Я люблю тебя, baby. Really.” He laughed against Evan’s throat, and Evan felt his own chest constricting at the sound. It was his favourite thing in the world. These domestic moments tucked away in their otherwise fast-paced lives.

“I love you too, Bat,” Barty kissed him, taking his time. His hands were on Evan’s waist, guiding him into a slow dance. The music was fast, but there was something about Barty moving him so slowly and gingerly across their living room. “Your tequila’s waiting for you.”

“Shots?” Barty looked at him through his lashes, innocent and sweet.

“You already know it. There should be a lime in the fridge,” Evan watches Barty from behind, silently admiring the slope of his shoulders and the narrowness of his waist. Barty was beyond beautiful, in all honesty. He was breathtaking, the same way a scenery was. One could never take their eyes off him even if they wanted to. He was the automatic center of attention of any event, and he reveled in it. He knew that his beauty was a weapon, and he wielded it with pride.

“Роза, find your stash. I’m feeling like a bit of pot today.”

“Alright, but not too much. We both know chemsex isn’t for us.” Barty laughed softly from the kitchen. Evan headed to their bedroom, flicking the lights on. He always kept a bit with him at all times. That was his vice. Barty had alcohol, and Evan had his stash of pot. From the room, he could hear Barty singing along with the song. The drunker he got, the more prominent his accent got. It wouldn’t be long before the boy was speaking purely in Russian.

Evan rejoined his boyfriend in the living room, who had already laid out multiple shot glasses in a row, with a bunch of slices of lime alongside them.

“Salt?”

“Don’t worry about it, солнышко,” Barty ruffled his hair. He picked up the salt shaker and unscrewed its lid. He shook out some salt onto the back of his palm, and licked it off. Before Evan could react, Barty was kissing him, the taste of salt filling his mouth. “Drink up, baby.”

Evan picked up a glass and threw the contents of it back into his mouth. The alcohol burned as it went down. Barty handed him a wedge of lime and he bit into it, eyes scrunching up at the sourness. He wasn’t a fan of tequila, evidently. He waved his hand around his neck, signaling that he was done. Barty pouted, eyebrows furrowed.

“Don’t be a spoilsport, Evs.” He scanned Evan’s face expectantly, and Evan couldn’t help but oblige.

“Fine, but only one more. That’s all.”

“I won’t push you for more anyway. Everyone knows what happens when you’re tipsy, or need I remind you about the time you cried when I said I was taken?” Evan scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“Low blow, Bat.”

“I could take it lower.” Barty winks and Evan’s heart skips a beat. One would expect that the love between both of them would decrease over the year— especially with how maddeningly close they are— but Evan still felt flustered when Barty smiled at him, the same way he did at sixteen. Evan was, admittedly, mad for him; the way a poet is mad for a dark night, an artist mad for a muse. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for this man, and no one could stop them from being close, not life and definitely not death.

“You talk too much.” Evan reached for a second shot glass, deciding against a chaser. It would be something he’s going to regret a couple seconds from now, but that was a consequence he was willing to live with.

“Would you rather I stop?”

Making a sour face, Evan responds, “No, never.” Barty smiles a lopsided grin, far from perfect.

“Now, why would you do that? Никакого самоконтроля, говорю вам.”

“Mock me all you want in words only you understand, but don’t forget that I pay for the alcohol.” Barty’s expression switched immediately, eyes going wide in surprise.

“You know I love you, Evan. I would never mock you.”

“That’s hardly believable, but I’ll let it go this time.” Barty unwrapped the boa from his neck, looping it over Evan’s shoulders. He puts no space between them, they stand perfectly flush with each other. Barty smells like alcohol and expensive perfume; Barty smells like home.

“Dance with me, любимый.”

“Music’s too fast.”

“So we hasten.” And that was that. Barty is swinging his hips, singing loudly. Though Evan understands a small amount of Russian, he never bothered to learn it. He wanted to keep it sacred for Barty. It was his relationship with his childhood, and Evan wanted no part in causing ruination to that. Evan found out that Russian could be polarising. It could sound crass and rude, and it could sound soft and gentle at the same time. “Now, Evan, I’ve seen you dance better than that.”

“I’m a better singer than dancer, Bat.” Barty blinked a couple of times, almost like he was batting his eyelashes.

“So open your throat and sing, magpie.” Evan grinned.

“I’ve heard that one in the confines of our bedroom before,”

“I didn’t hear you complaining, шлюха,”

“I know that word, Bat, and I know that’s what half of our school called you.” Barty shrugs. Everyone and their mother knew that Barty was the slut of the school. He got around, and he enjoyed the attention he got. Evan never had a problem with his past, because none of the pricks in school were going to bed with him everyday at obscene hours of the morning, drunk and exhausted.

“I’m going to smoke, do you want one?” Evan looked at him incredulously, as if that was a question that needed to be asked. “Alright, alright, don’t look at me like that. I may just have to skip the pot and move to the end of the night that both of us are definitely looking forward to.”

“Subtlety was always your strong suit.” Evan tucks a couple strands of Barty’s hair behind his ear, who smiled slowly.

“I really fucking love you, you know that?” Their voices are low in the room full of blaring lyrics in another language.

“Yeah. Yeah, I know.”

***

Two joints in, Barty had danced his energy out, the glitter on his eyelids almost fading and sweat starting to bead on his forehead. Evan watched him, occasionally throwing a couple of bills and whistling at the man. Barty got Evan to sing, showing him vague phonetic translations of the lyrics he couldn’t understand. He was laughing as Evan struggled with the words, but it was full of admiration and mirth.

It was well past three in the morning, and the most disciplined of runners would be waking up to get on with their day soon. They had turned off their music, because their heads had already started hurting from the noise. Maybe their neighbours had a point.

Evan was sitting in the corner of one of their sofas, a cigarette between his lips. Barty was finally starting to come down from his high, boa clutched in both his hands. The man half-twirled, dropping himself onto the sofa right next to Evan, his head dropping onto his shoulder.

“Tonight was fun,” Barty had a soft, dazed smile on his face.

“Yeah, it was. Shame we have to get to work tomorrow.”

“Don’t even remind me,” He reaches for the cigarette, smoking it himself. They sit in silence, only the slow buzz of the thermostat filling the space between them.

“Я не думаю, что смогу жить без тебя.” Evan had a pulling feeling at the back of his mind that this meant something important to Barty; a confession, if you would.

“Tell me what that means, Bat.”

“I don’t think I could live without you. Year after year after year, you were the only constant I had. I’m so grateful for that. I’m so grateful for you, Evan.” Barty’s voice cracks slightly, and Evan turns to see the man crying. “Everyday I hope I don’t fuck this up with you, like I did all those years ago. I knew you liked me, but I wasn’t ready to accept my own feelings. Maybe I was scared to lose our friendship if it all went south.”

“But it hasn’t gone south, has it? You and me, here, right now. This is everything I could ever ask for. All I could dream of since I was fourteen. Barty, you couldn’t fuck this up even if you tried as hard as you could. I would love you regardless and I’ll be there to pick up every fucking piece, even if it hurts to.”

“Nothing I ever write will satiate my love for you, and I’m scared of that. The sheer magnitude of it is frightening.”

“Just knowing you love me is more than enough.”

“I think,” he pauses, seemingly trying to find anything to say. “I think we should get married, любимый.” Evan’s hand flies up to his mouth, trying to conceal his severely shocked expression.

“Yes. Yes, one hundred times, yes.” And so, sitting in the slow come-up of the sun, with a cigarette burning to its filter, they had gone and become the closest they’d ever been.

[inamindfarfaraway]

I can’t believe I’m posting about Sonic Underground, but this is the Cringe App, so here are some random thoughts and headcanons:

Sonia has super strength parallel to Sonic’s super speed (Manic has no innate power, because life isn’t fair) and that should have been explored more. Like, outside of battle. Imagine all the training Lady Windimere must have put her through to act ladylike and demure and not accidentally break all the fragile expensive things around her. She casually carries her brothers and Bartleby all the time. Sometimes she squeezes them a little too hard when she hugs them. She reunites with Bartleby after a rough mission and effortlessly picks him, spins him around and throws him high into the air. She can arm-wrestle Knuckles as an equal. Someone else is working on a heavy robot or vehicle or something and Sonia is propping or holding it up for them. The van breaks down in a place they can’t stay in and she just sighs, tells her brothers to take out and carry everything they can, lifts the van over her head and starts walking. She grabs the scruff of Sonic’s neck with her fingers when he tries to run away to do something stupid and he runs in place, extremely annoyed. A very exasperated Cyrus tells her that she needs to stop hitting the door buttons so hard when she dramatically leaves after an argument (thank God the doors don’t have hinges to be ripped off of), because they can’t keep installing new ones. First Sonic wearing away the floors and heating the metal so much it could melt people’s shoes, now this? He does have a favourite triplet and it’s Manic. This isn’t the only reason, but it’s a big one.

Seriously, why didn’t the show remark more on how Manic doesn’t have a power? I guess his instrument giving him earth manipulation while the others just get lasers kinda makes up for it. Maybe super genes run in the royal family recessively. With all the stock episode plots they did, you’d think there’d be one where he felt inferior to his siblings for this reason and reaffirmed his worth by saving the day and rescuing them when they were both captured.

There really should have been a body swap episode. Here’s my pitch: tensions are running high between the siblings as they clash over their respective flaws and insecurities, when some magical shenanigans that tie into whatever Robotnik’s plan is switch their consciousnesses around. Sonic is in Manic’s body, Manic in Sonia’s and Sonia in Sonic's. Now, Sonia has been stressed lately feeling pressured to be the mature, responsible one and, with so much steam to let off, finds herself slipping into Sonic’s recklessness, impulsivity and cockiness. She can literally outrun all her problems… or so she thinks. The speed is liberating and intoxicating. Meanwhile, Manic, who was giving her shit at the start, realizes how much restraint Sonia needs to exercise to not cause more trouble than she fixes with her strength and that, while it definitely makes some things easier, having a superpower isn’t a cure-all and requires rules in itself. He gains a greater respect and appreciation for her, which enables him to remind her of the value of responsibility and caution when she runs off the deep end. Sonic absolutely hates not having any extraordinary abilities. At first his siblings think he’s just cranky because he can’t do awesome tricks anymore and has to have a normal person’s amount of patience. Averse to vulnerability as he is, he pretends that that’s the extent of it; but as his complaints shift from whining to self-abuse, it turns out that he can’t stand feeling this helpless. He’s never been this incapable before. It hurts. It takes him right back to the worst moments of his life, when he wasn’t fast enough to save his parents and uncle. Now he isn’t fast enough to save anyone. Keeping the cycle of empathy going after Manic talks her down, Sonia reflects on how amazing her new speed feels and what having had that power her whole life might have done to her self-esteem. She tells Sonic that his speed and usefulness don’t define him or his worth, and it’s okay to fail, need to go slow, make mistakes and have things that are just beyond you. Everyone does. She’s made some big mistakes herself just that day! What matters is the strengths you do have and how you use them. He’s done so much good, for all his flaws, and she and Manic love every part of him. Inspired, Sonic ultimately defeats Robotnik using his intelligence and leadership skills, with both his siblings using their new powers effectively and wisely to make the plan work. Once they switch back, they get in a similar unfortunate situation to the one that pushed their stress to the tipping point in the beginning, only now they take it in stride and deal with it together. Who am I kidding, the show wouldn’t have gone into that much character analysis and emotional depth. That’s why we need fanfiction.

Sonia has had a five-star privileged education; however, she must also unlearn all Robotnik’s propaganda and lies. Sonic has had a less thorough education, but presumably still a pretty good one and without any of the propaganda from moving in with Uncle Chuck onward. Manic has never been to school a day in his life. Think of the comedy you could get out of this arrangement. But also, is Manic illiterate? His reading and writing are probably significantly poorer than the others’, right? I headcanon he’s secretly insecure about his lack of formal education and occasionally teases Sonia for her “nerdy” advanced knowledge and makes fun of her when she doesn’t know something, in an effort to bring her down to his level.

Uncle Chuck is the triplets’ father’s brother, not of royal blood. My headcanon is that after Robotnik killed the king during the takeover, he agreed to go into hiding and cut ties with Aleena. He didn’t plan to have a role in her children’s lives until the Time arrived, but he wound up near enough Sonic’s home to visit and couldn’t stay away. He fondly told Sonic a great deal about life before Robotnik ruined everything and his birth parents, carefully omitting that they were the king and queen of course.

Sonic and Manic love to hear Mindy and Bartleby’s stories about Sonia before they met her. Though they are sad that the people who could tell such stories about them are all roboticized, so unless until a deroboticizer is invented there are parts of their early lives they don’t remember or fully understand that can simply never be told. In general, seeing Sonia with her old friends makes them feel Big Feelings. They’re glad one of them still has people from before in their life, but… it stings.

Where? Was the triplets’ grief?? Over their parents and guardians??? Where were the bonding moments about it? Where were the reminiscing scenes and Sonic explaining how he lost his old family twice and had to watch the first time? Where were the dramatic, heartwrenching confrontations with the roboticized guardians? FANFICS I NEED YOU

Manic likes to tinker with machinery when he’s bored, anxious, frustrated, guilty or even excited. Basically, he reaches a significant intensity of emotion and gets out the tools. He’s a fidgeter in general and always doing something with his hands - why do you think Farrell supported his impractical, attention-drawing hobby of drumming? A deroboticizor is a top priority ongoing project in the Resistance and if he’s in a really bad mental state, especially if he’s missing his dad, he can probably be found working tirelessly on one of the prototypes. Sleep, hunger, other people, the passage of time all mean nothing to him in that state. Sonic is the best at snapping him out of it because swap engineering with running and vigilantism and he essentially has the same coping mechanism, so he gets it in a way Sonia can’t. However, the sign that the hyperactive brothers are completely crushed and hopeless is that they lose their energy and motivation. If they’re notably still, slow and restrained in movement, they are Not Okay.

Sonia’s contrasting coping mechanism is to distract herself and her support system from her feelings with others’ business. That can manifest as criticizing someone else (constructively or destructively), wanting details on some aspect of their life, stoking drama and gossiping about them, or trying to fix their problems and/or make them open up about their issues. The last one is increasingly common since embarking on her character development. She’s always been a social butterfly and was a duck in water in the social perception, awareness and shrewdness-centric culture of the upper class; genuinely loves using those skills to help people so this is still in character on a good day; and is so at best charismatic and at worst overbearing that she can easily make you worry more about whatever she’s latched onto as a diversion, whether you agree with her stance on it or not. It takes a trained eye to catch when she’s actually neglecting herself. An indicator is that if her drive is the subconscious desire to avoid confronting her own feelings, she’ll be or become over time less tactful, patient and respectful of boundaries than usual, or resort to pettier topics in her desperation. Her brothers are the best at telling these behaviours apart from her healthy altruism and harmless theatrics and making her talk.

The medallions are royal family heirlooms. The rare, potent magical crystal they were carved from was a primary resource of Mobotropolis and the reason the capital was built there, their clean energy used for rapid magical/technological advancement that brought huge prosperity to Mobius, hence the paradise it was pre-Robotnik. Shards of them were incorporated in many royal regalia pieces. Through past political upheavals, disasters and thefts, most of the ornamental fragments have been lost. The medallions were made relatively recently to celebrate the dawn of a new golden age of art and culture; music was a key part of Mobian culture, so it was symbolically very fitting to give the rulers and protectors of the people instruments and weapons in one. It represented the ideal that they should give as much as they were able to take - even if they took up arms, they would at the same time have to preserve the life and spirit of Mobius through playing music. Hopefully that would tether them to their conscience. Plus, what’s more gloriously badass for a monarch than defeating your enemy by playing a rock cover of your national anthem? Robotnik’s relentless mining extracted the last of this precious resource years ago. He forgot the sustainable methods his predecessors used to harness the magic indefinitely because he can’t be bothered to understand magic, so he’s exhausted the power of every existing piece of the crystal besides the three medallions that have remained out of his grasp. He keeps trying to synthesize it, but you can’t synthesize ✨magic.✨ The sudden decline and loss of a longstanding reliable power source has made everyone reliant on Robotnik’s dirty energy. When the royal family retake their thrones, the medallions can either be given up and used to power Mobius or the very similar Chaos Emeralds used instead upon relearning the magic crystal energy harnessing techniques. Wouldn’t it be cool if discovering the Chaos Emeralds or recovering them from Robotnik was what turned the tide of the war? Sonic, Manic and Sonia going super and defeating Robotnik once and for all? Yes, yes it would.

Sonia is the oldest. Manic is the youngest. Sonic, as in the movies, is the middle child. Sonic and Sonia believe their birth order is important and she will never stop lording it over him, since before they got ahold of their birth certificates he’d assumed he was the oldest. Manic doesn’t care and wishes they would drop it.

Having been eager to help his uncle around the house and then needing to pull his weight in the Resistance, Sonic is a reliably good cook. He likes to learn more whenever he has the resources and time to experiment. Manic had no technical skills initially, not having had a kitchen and all, but is learning quickly under Sonic’s tutelage and has the sheer ingenuity to make a meal out of pretty much anything. Sonia can’t cook for shit. Sonic won’t give up on trying to teach her… but he’s certainly been tempted.

Sonic is afraid of fire due to the trauma of watching his old home burn down when he lost his parents (I put him at eight at the time, like Batman, and so he spends an almost equal number of years with his adoptive family and Uncle Chuck if he’s fifteen in the show). The smell of Sonia burning toast is enough to trigger flashbacks. Once Robotnik trapped the siblings in a burning building and he just froze, overwhelmed with terror; Sonia had to carry him to safety like a firefighter.

Follow-up with Tails.

[lizhly-writes]

@aeluuin hi. anyway! anyway!!!! continued from this normal orv fan knw thing!

This is really not how Kim Namwoon thought he’d be spending his morning.  Or his afternoon.  Or his night.  Or, really, any moment of his existence.  Good to know that, faced with a difficult decision, he’s super chill with picking murder.

He hadn’t had a choice!  Catching one of three insects is the same of killing one of three characters – people with names, personalities, stories!  Stories that, altogether, set this worldline to successful end!  Is he willing to risk that?  Better to kill one of those passerby NPCs no one gave a shit about, right?  He hadn’t had a choice!

Haha, it’s better if he thinks of it like that, isn’t he?  If he really thinks about it – but of course, he’s not going to really think about it.  He’s been spending five minutes carefully not thinking about it, because if he thinks about it, if he really thinks through the implications of what he’s done –

Kim Dokja is staring at him.

“Well, what’ll it be, ahjussi?” Kim Namwoon says, a little manic, because what else could he possibly be at the moment?  This is his doom right here, isn’t it?

It isn’t like the novel.  Can’t be like the novel, when Kim Namwoon has already satisfied scenario conditions.  If Kim Dokja wants to kill him, then Kim Dokja has to do it with his own two hands – literally with his own hands, because it isn’t as if Kim Dokja has a weapon other than his fucking money.

Wow, wouldn’t that be something?  That’s an especially brutal death, isn’t it?  Wouldn’t it be poetic justice if it happened to Kim Namwoon, considering what the original character had been trying to do?

He straightens up, knife at the ready, watching Kim Dokja – watching each blink, each twitch, every little movement – 

Kim Dokja walks away.

“...Eh?  Hey–” Kim Namwoon cuts himself off before he can actually ask why aren’t you going to kill me, because that’s – that’s just the worst question all around, he doesn’t actually want Kim Dokja to reconsider, but… he’s only human.  He’d still like to know.

Hey, isn’t he still the epitome of all of Kim Dokja’s complaints?  His self-hatred issues?  Shouldn’t there be some kind of duel to the death? Kim Namwoon’s not complaining, of course!  But this is…

Anticlimactic.  That’s the word he’s looking for.

Huh.

He exhales. This is… this is an okay outcome.  He wanted Kim Dokja to ignore him.  Kim Dokja is ignoring him.  This is exactly what he wanted.

There’s still five minutes left to his scenario.

He wants to put his head between his knees and just… breathe.  But of course, that’s not allowed.  That show he put up earlier isn’t enough to dissuade everyone from approaching him if he sinks to the floor, curled up in fetal position, not at all paying attention to the world around him.  That’s an easy target if he’s ever seen one.

Kim Namwoon can do that thing if he wants later.  

For now, he leans against the train carriage wall and waits.

...

Kim Namwoon isn’t moving.  He seems content to stand there, smiling defensively, ready to take down anything that dares attack him. Fine.  Kim Dokja will leave him to it.  There are better uses of time than watching a high schooler who doesn’t seem to inclined to do anything.

Five minutes left.

[You have killed a living thing.]

[100 coins have been earned as additional compensation.]

[You have killed a living thing.]

[100 coins have been earned as additional compensation.]

One question answered: eggs do count as living creatures.

If he had more time, it would be easy to portion out the insect egg sack to save every person on this train.  But who has that kind of time?  Furthermore, is that kind of thing worth it to begin with?  What’s the point in lugging around dead weight?

If they’re dead weight, they should be at least loyal.  And there’s no way he could make sure of that.  Ideally, he’d want the Behind The Scenes Contract to be sure – but he remembers that contract being worth far more than what Yoo Joonghyuk could get in these early scenarios.

“Hey,” Kim Dokja says.  “Dokkaebi.  Are you paying attention?  What can I do with these coins?”

Maybe there’s a cheaper option he doesn’t know about.

And certainly there are many people here willing to sign away their lives, if only they could guarantee that they wouldn’t be destroyed.

[s-exy-sapphillean]

Not trying to start an argument or anything so please don’t take it that way.

I think you have a flawed idea of what is being depicted with Andrew’s medication. It is a whole thing with Andrew’s character that he has been failed by the medical/justice/foster system. That is a very real thing that happens. Just because Nora made some things up to illustrate what she was trying to depict doesn’t make the thing she’s depicting any less real.

He is canonically bipolar. His medicine or he himself are implied to be misdiagnosed. Again something that happens irl. It is an ongoing thematic thing for Andrew to be misrepresented and misunderstood. With his family and the foxes it’s seeing him as a monster. For the medical system it’s seeing him as psychotic rather than him being bipolar with cptsd.

It’s not inherently demonization to depict real flaws in the system in especially not when we see Andrew getting help from people in that same system. (Bee) I’m just saying that the book itself shows both good and bad working in the same system. It’s morally gray I. A way that you seem to dismiss and frame as a black and white issue.

The point im trying to make is that nobody is trying to say that we should look at aftg uncritically rather that we should, but it’s also important to not dismiss what Nora is trying to get across with the information displayed just because the way she went about given us the information is not the pinnacle of moral purity.

(Idk I’m sorry for leaving this rambling mess in your ask box but I think this is a really interesting idea you posed and wanted to offer an alternative view point. No hate or anything i actually really like your account :D )

You see, the thing is that you just addressed a whole lot of complaints that i did not voice.

Of course nora's intentions were to write about the medical system and mental health treatment failing andrew. And there's nothing wrong with that specifically because those are very real issues people with mental illness experience, it's literally something i have experienced. The thing with that however, and what the actual issue is, is that you can't just go "well it's meant to comment on real issues" when beyond the surface level there is nothing real about what is presented and anything based in reality is overshadowed by the amount of shit that's made up.

Because it is abundantly clear both by how it is written and by how nora has talked about andrew's mental illness that she did not care to research actual experiences instead of just going with what she thought she already knew/what she assumed.

You can not both have "well it's okay to make stuff up, it's just supposed to illustrate something not be about the real thing" and "andrew is canonically bipolar" simultaneously. If you are going to use real disorders you better do them justice. Our disabilities and mental illness don't exist to be used as plot devices.

Andrew is not written like he is bipolar (and let's remember that it is nora who calls him bipolar, not what he has been misdiagnosed as in universe). His mania literally only comes from his medication and it is emphasized repeatedly when he gets around to getting sober that he does not experience this mania naturally off his meds. That is not how bipolar works. It's also not how being wrongfully medicated for "being psychotic" works.

Hi, i'm someone who takes antipsychotics. I am also someone who has been affected by how much antipsychotic meds have been fearmongered (needing antipsychotic meds when everywhere you look they get depicted as something that fundamentally changes you as a person is scary as fuck & keeps people hesitant about taking medication that will vastly improve their life). And yeah being falsely put on antipsychotics can be devastating but there are no meds that will turn you into a violent manic who experiences constant forced amusement, even if they're falsely prescribed to you. What antipsychotics generally do (besides bad physical side effects) when falsely prescribed is make you feel loopy and tired, suppress sensations like hunger, raise anxiety, cause emotional numbness, make it difficult to think and make you feel nauseous (not in the way andrew does because he only feels sick when they wear off). I have seen people who were falsely put on pretty high doses describe it as feeling trapped in their own mind, and the sedative effects have been blamed for deaths in misuse cases involving older patients. Ironically if andrew was actually bipolar, some antipsychotics could help him because they do have mood stabilizing effects.

Additionally the way his medication is essentially described like a state prescribed ecstasy dose. Yes there is plenty of medication that can be addicting and yes going off them can be rough and dangerous but it's written as if he has a severe drug addiction (describing him as high, the way his "withdrawal" manifests, the process of him being taken off the meds being almost treated like he's getting an addiction treated). And it is, in my opinion, incredibly fucking harmful to depict medication like that. She did not have to do all that to write about a misdiagnosis and wrong medication because that's not how that works when that stuff actually happens.

The ableism andrew faces in universe is not at all what i take issue with. Yes the use of slurs and the way other characters demonize him is uncomfortable as fuck but that is in universe and in character ableism, and believe it or not, i can tell the difference between that and ableist writing.

I understand that nora wanted to write about another part of the system failing andrew, and that just like all the other shit andrew has been through she used issues that exist irl, that real people go through. I don't think nora contributed to deliberate malicious demonization. But you cannot convince me she actually put in any proper research, effort and care into writing him as bipolar (if that was even actually what she had in mind when writing him and not just what she decided to label him when people asked). And that is something i consider careless ableism.

Misrepresenting real mental illness that you explicitly named IS ableist. Misrepresenting how psychiatric medication works IS ableist and harmful. Mentally ill people being subjected to medical abuse, misdiagnosis and malpractice IS a very real issue and that rly just makes making shit up as you go instead of representing the actual real horrors of those experiences even worse.

Either make up the whole thing and don't throw around the names of real disorders or put in the effort to do what you chose to use as a plot device actual justice.

I don't think that's too much to ask as a person who is affected by how much misrepresentation of real disorders there already is, and I don't think it's a reach to say not caring enough to do it better is ableist.

(i am generally an intense person and topics like this in particular make me get heated. I do not care to police my own tone but that does not mean i have anything against u personally or against u trying to talk about this further)