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✨His Forbidden Fruit✨
Angel!Lucifer x f!human reader
Summary: You are the first woman, Eden is your paradise. Or at least it’s supposed to be. Adam has been making life in the garden difficult. That is, until a certain angel comes along…
Warnings: smut, 18+, fingering, oral (m & f receiving), p in v, first time
"Fine! Go ahead and run! See how far that fucking gets you!" you heard Adam shout after you as you took off into the dense forest.
You couldn’t stand to be around him anymore. The person who you were made for, the one who you were supposed to be equal with, was a vile and despicable human. Always trying to tell you what to do, how to act, what to say, it was too much to handle anymore. You pushed through the thick foliage of the garden, unaware of how long you’ve been running. After some time, you came to an opening. A beautiful crystal lake stretched across the land surrounded by large trees filled with all different sorts of fruits. It looked like a paradise, but in your sorrow you couldn’t find the beauty in any of it. You collapsed, sitting on top of a nearby rock, and you sobbed. You buried your face in your hands and brought your legs to your chest. You were alone and you felt like there was no escaping the life given to you.
But you weren’t alone for long.
“Beautiful creature, why do you cry?” a soothing voice said.
Your breath caught in your thought at the sound of this voice. It wasn’t Adam’s. You lifted your head but saw no one around you. Until you noticed you had somehow been enveloped in shadow. You raised your head further and some something, or rather someone, floating just above you, their enormous wings stretched out, shading you from the bright sun. You gasped; your body screamed at you to run but your mind refused to move a muscle.
“Do not be afraid,” the being spoke softly, “I mean you no harm.”
You gulped, clutching your legs to your chest, trying to make yourself as small as possible. “Who…who are you?”
The spirit landed on the grass below and smiled brightly. “I am the light bringer, the morning star for the heavens above,” he answered, outstretching his hand. “But you can call me Lucifer.”
An angel, you thought to yourself. You gazed at his hand hesitantly and wiped the remaining tears from your face in an attempt to gain composer. “Did Heaven send you here, Lucifer?”
“Well, not exactly,” he admitted, pulling his hand away and rubbing the back of his neck. “In all honesty, I shouldn’t even be here.”
You tilted your head in confusion. “Then why are you?”
Lucifer sighed and looked away from you. “I…I’m not sure. This place, this garden, it’s enchanting! But I was denied any say in how it should be…” You saw how resigned the angel was as he spoke to you. A pang of sadness stung your chest. “Heaven was not happy with any of the ideas I provided them. They never are. I just…wanted to see it for myself. But then, I saw you running, and I saw you crying. I couldn’t stand to see you filled with such pain.” He held out his hand once more. “Please, tell me what troubles you. Perhaps I could help.”
You took a closer look at the angel. His sapphire eyes were enchanting, it seemed almost impossible to look away. And his pale complexion very much stood out in the garden overrun with an abundance of different colors. You glanced at his enormous wings, white and gold in color, and how they perfectly complimented the rays of the sun that shows through the tree branches.
He was the most beautiful thing you've ever seen.
Tentatively, you took a hold of his hand as he helped you up from the rock you were perched on. You were about to speak, but then Lucifer let go of your hand in an instant.
"A-AH!" the angel squeaked as he stumbled backwards, tripping in the process and landing on the soft grass below. He shieled his eyes and shifted his body so he was no longer facing you.
"Lucifer, what's the matter?" you asked as you stood there puzzled.
"Oh! Umm...nothing! Nothing's wrong!" he answered quickly. "I...I forgot that when heaven created you, they left you...bare."
You tilted your head in confusion. "Bare? I don't understand." Without answering, you watched as Lucifer flicked his wrist, his eyes still avoiding yours. All of a sudden, you felt your body becoming wrapped in whatever Lucifer had just summoned for you. You looked down and realized that most of your skin had been covered in a foreign material that you have not encountered before. A part of it hung over your shoulder while the other was left untouched. It was draped down just past your knees. "What is this?" you questioned as you reached down to feel the white cloth. It was unbelievably soft and light, almost as if you didn't have anything on your body at all.
Lucifer peaked through his hands; you heard him sign in relief. He stood up and brushed the dirt of his robe before returning to your side. "Forgive me," he started, "that was a bit of an...overreaction. I'm sorry if I startled you!"
"It's alright, Lucifer," you smiled at him. "I'm still a bit confused though, what is this for? Was there something wrong with my appearance?"
Lucifer's eyes widened. "Oh gosh, no no no! Of course not! You're perfect! WAIT! I mean you look perfect! GAH NO! I uhh...it's...it's a gift! Yeah, that's it! It's a gift for you!"
"A gift?" You couldn't help but smile. "Adam has never given me a gift..."
You saw Lucifer frown as he took ahold of your hand once more. "I'm sorry to hear that, my flower. Here, follow me." Lucifer guided you to the lake's edge and knelt down, signaling you to join him. You did as he asked and fell to your knees in front of him. "Now tell me, why had you run away?"
You looked down and began to fiddle with your hands, unsure if your reason would upset the angel. "It's Adam..." you began, "He's...so needlessly demanding and harsh. He doesn't see us as equals, he believes himself to be superior to me. I've tried explaining to him that he shouldn't be acting this way, but he refuses to listen! Finally, I had enough of him...so I ran..." You felt the tears well up in your eyes once more, small whimpers escaping your throat as you tried to hold yourself together. "I know we're meant to be partners and I've sure heaven will not be happy b-but..."
"Shh, it's alright." Lucifer cooed as he wiped away the tears the fell down your cheek. "Please, no more tears. You were right to stand up to him. Adam should know better." You sighed and let your head rest in Lucifer's small yet tender hand. You glanced over at the pound when you heard an unfamiliar noise emanating from the center. You noticed some feathered creatures you didn't recognize swimming on the lakes surface. There seemed to be one that was much larger than all the others. You looked back at Lucifer and saw his face light up with delight. "Do you see those little ones over there?" You nodded. "Heaven may not have wanted my input on creation, but that doesn't mean I didn't have any."
"Are those your creations?" you asked.
Lucifer smiled and then sighed. "One of very few. Do you want to get a closer look?"
You looked back out to the water and saw the group of animals flap their wings, splashing the water in every direction. They seemed so full of life and energy, watching them play filled your heart with warmth. You nodded, albeit a bit nervously. Lucifer let out a melodic whistle; you watched as the little creatures made their way towards the lake bank. You saw them use their small wings to help them onto land and waddle towards the two of you. Initially, you stretched out your hand to touch one of the smaller ones but pulled back in hesitation.
"Don't worry," Lucifer reassured, "they are harmless, I promise! Watch!" Lucifer cupped his hands together and laid them down in the soft grass. A few of the small ones happily chippered and hopped into his palms. "Want to give it a try?"
You copied Lucifer's motions exactly and watched as the same thing happened with the remaining babies. Their feathers were bright yellow and soft to the touch. You were in awe of the little lives you held in your hands. "They're so small," you said aloud to no one in particular. "What are they, Lucifer?"
The angel lowered his hands and let the little ones go back to what you now assumed was their guardian. "I named them ducks," Lucifer answered. "The little ones are ducklings; not fully formed yet but they will grow!"
You nuzzled your cheek to the handful of ducklings; their little peeps made you chuckle. "They're beautiful!" you exclaimed, letting them down so they could join their family once more.
"Yeah, beautiful..." you heard Lucifer murmur. You looked over to see his lovely blue eyes staring straight back at you, a tint of yellow now colored his cheeks. "Uhh, I mean, umm...here! Watch this!"
A sudden flash of sparkles left you dazed, but only for a second. Lucifer had disappeared in front of your eyes.
"Lucifer?" you called out, looking to either side of you but seeing no one.
"Down here!" you heard his voice respond. You looked down and saw a small little white duck in Lucifer's top hat. He smiled at you and wagged his feathered tail. You couldn't help but laugh.
"Oh, what an adorable little creature," you fawned playfully, cupping your hands once again and allowing him to hop in them. You brought him to your cheek and nuzzled him as you did with the others. Lucifer quacked in excitement. "I didn't know you could change forms!"
"It's not something I do often," he admitted. By the tone of his voice, it almost seemed like it was something that had been discouraged. "But I don't mind making a special exception for you!" You noticed the sun began to dip over the horizon, the fleeting sunlight shimmering off Lucifer's pristine white feathers. It would be night soon, and in that moment you realized you didn't have anywhere else to go. Lucifer noticed the change in your demeanor, tilting his head. "Is something the matter?" Before you could open your mouth to speak, a bellowing call could be heard from the tree line.
"Where the fuck could she be?!" you heard the voice ask, filled with annoyance. Adam. You saw the man push past the foliage and make it to the clearing. His eyes immediately found yours, and you felt as though your heart had nearly stopped. You let Lucifer down gently before standing up.
"Stay here," you whispered to him. "I'll talk with him."
"But-" Lucifer tried to refute, but you shook your head intensely.
"I don't want to risk angering heaven," you responded. "The last thing I want is for you to be punished for my choice. Please?"
Hesitantly, Lucifer nodded in agreement, making his way to the water to join the other ducks in an attempt to blend in. His little hat vanished as he started swimming. You sighed and turned to meet with the brute of a man who was already towering over you. His chest heaved; his breath was short. You could already tell this may not end well.
"Where the FUCK have you been?!" he began to shout, raising his hands in the air out of frustration. "I've been looking for you for way too long, you know that? Making me walk everywhere to find you? Fucking ridiculous!"
You took a deep inhale and let it out slowly before responding. "I'm sorry, Adam," you feigned an apology.
"Whatever," the man spat back. "You've had your temper tantrum, now let's g-" Adam paused, his eyes staring at the length of your body. "The fuck is this?" he asked grabbing the sleeve of the cloth that hung off your body. In your worry for Lucifer, you'd forgotten about the gift he had given you. You smacked Adam's hand away and wrapped your arms around yourself.
"It doesn't matter," you answered curtly.
You watched as the man's eyebrows furrowed at your non-compliance. "I don't have time for this," he reached out once more and took a firm hold of your wrist. "We're going back. Now!"
You slipped your wrist out of Adam's grasp and took a few steps back, your feet at the end of the lake. "I..." you started, your voice threatening to crack. "I'm not going back with you! I'm tired of your behavior and your disrespect. I'm not your servant, Adam, and I refuse to live the life I was given as your slave."
Adam snarled at you, stomping closer and closer to you, forcing you back into the water as you tried to avoid him. But it was to no avail. He was quick to grab your arm and yank you from the lake pulling flush against his bare chest. "That wasn't a suggestion," he spoke through gritted teeth. You tried to pull away but his grip on your arm was far too strong. "Like it or not toots, we're the only ones in this place. You have nowhere else to go and you know it! And frankly, I'm tired of these stupid games! Now, quit acting like a bitch and move your-"
"THAT'S ENOUGH!" a booming voiced roared. You felt a hand take a firm hold of the one that was trapped by Adam and watched as another tore Adam's own hand away from you. Lucifer appeared in front of you after separating you from the man. The angle floated off the ground, his wings spread out wide as he moved swiftly towards the startled man. "How dare you!" Lucifer growled. "How dare you put your hands on her like that! How dare you speak to her like that! You have no right!"
Adam held his hand in pain, shooting daggers in Lucifer's direction. "Who the fuck are you?!" He took a step closer, not waiting for an answer. Even as Lucifer hovered over the ground, Adam still towered over him easily. "You know what, I don't care! Listen, short stack, I don't know who you are or why you're here, but you need to get the fuck out of my way. She's my wife and I can do whatever I want to her. She's mine, got it?"
Adam curled his uninjured hand into a fist and took a swing at Lucifer, only for him to fall flat on his face as Lucifer easily dodged his attack. "Nice try," the angel taunted, "and by the way, the name's Lucifer." You let out a small laugh. Fire burned in Adam's eyes as he lifted his head.
"Shut the fuck up!" he yelled at you. But Lucifer would not accept this response. He latched onto Adam's arm and lifted him of the ground like he weighed nothing.
"What did I tell you about speaking to her like that?" Lucifer threatened. He tossed Adam against one of the trees that stood at the edge of the clearing. The man groaned in pain, attempting to pull himself up and lean his aching body against the tree. Lucifer quickly swooped down, acting as a barrier between the two of you. "You've shown me who you are, Adam. You are a monster, a disgrace. You treat this woman like the dirt you walk on and you expect her to stay with you? To love you?" Lucifer hoisted Adam up, pinning him against the truck. "You will never see her again; do you understand me? You're going to leave this place and never come back. She is under my protection now. And if you ever so much as come within a mile of her, I will not hesitate to turn you back into the dust you were formed from." Lucifer released his grip on Adam and watched as he took a few steps back into the forest. "Leave. Now!"
Adam wiped the small amount of blood that dripped from his lip and laughed darkly. "Fine, keep her!" he yelled. "She doesn't mean anything to me! Who would want a slut like her anyway!"
"GO!" Lucifer bellowed.
Without another word, Adam took off into the trees. Lucifer flew high up in the sky within seconds, his arms stretched out on either side. The ground beneath you began to shake violently and you wanted to call out for Lucifer before you realized that he was the cause. Seemingly out of nowhere, large rock formations began rising from the earth, rock tumbling down as the mountains grew. As soon as they reached Lucifer's height, they stopped.
And then there was silence.
Your heartbeat pounded in your ears as you tried to stop yourself from shaking. Overwhelmed by the situation that had just unfolded, you fell to the ground and began to cry softly. But it wasn't as quiet as you thought. In a flash, Lucifer had flown to your side, holding you in a tender embrace.
"I'm sorry," he whispered to you. "None of this was your fault. You're safe now." You clung to the angel desperately, not holding back any of your tears. He pulled you closer, letting his wings wrap around you, completely covering your trembling body. Your breathing steadied the longer you held onto him; this was the first time you had ever felt safe. He pulled away from you slowly, wiping away the last of your tears. "I have to go," Lucifer continued, "but just for a little while. I need to tell the others what happened." He looked behind him and sighed. "They're not going to appreciate my new renovation to the garden," he turned back to you and smiled, "but they can stay upset for as long as they want. Those mountains are permanent; this is your haven now."
You sniffled and took ahold of his hands. "Thank you, Lucifer," you managed to utter.
Just then, a glowing portal formed behind Lucifer. He stood up slowly, but not before plucking a feather from his wings. "Here," he spoke softly, handing it over to you. "This is my promise to you; I will be back for it. Can you keep it safe for me?" You nodded. With one last grin, he turned and made his way through the portal that closed behind him. The quite had once again returned.
And for the first time in your life, you were left alone.
****
The sun had set a while ago. You knew you should probably sleep, but your head was filled with too many thoughts for you to even consider it. You sat against the tree by the lake, waiting patiently for your rescuer to return. You stared at the feather for what seemed like an eternity; it emanated a subtle glow of light, a brilliant golden color that rivaled the setting sun. You continued to turn over today's events in your mind. How did this happen? Did I ruin heaven's plan? If Lucifer is punished for what I've done I will never forgive myself...
"Lucifer..." you mumbled to yourself. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn't get him out of your mind. Why were you forced to live with a man like Adam when someone like Lucifer existed? How could the creation of the first man have gone so wrong? You didn't understand. But your jumbled up thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice.
"Yes, little dove?" Lucifer answered sweetly. Your heart skipped a beat, not expecting him to show up so soon. Nevertheless, you smiled as he sat down next to you. "I heard you say my name. Did you miss me already?"
Your cheeks felt increasingly warm all of a sudden at his question. "O-Oh, no...I mean, yes! I did. I was just thinking out loud, I suppose." You looked down at the glowing feather in your hand. "Here, you can have your feather back."
He took it from your hand and gently placed it behind your ear. "It's yours," Lucifer responded with a soft smile. "I know you'll keep it safe for me. And don't worry about losing it; I made sure it'll always find its way back to you."
You crawled over to the lake and stared at your reflection, admiring the new accessory. It suited you. You sat back down next to Lucifer, shifting so you were almost at his hip. "What did the angels say?" you asked hesitantly. "Were they angry?"
Lucifer rubbed the back of his neck, gazing down at the ground. “Well…they weren’t happy.” Your face fell at his words. He glanced at you and took ahold of your hand. “Don’t worry, they won’t force you to be with Adam. They’ve come up with a different solution…”
Your head fell to the side, curious. “You don’t sound happy about it.”
Lucifer shook his head. “They’re going to give him another wife. I advised against it, but after the stunt I pulled today, they weren’t very keen on listening to me. Not that they ever do.”
Your eyes drifted down to the ground, the guilt bubbling up in your chest. “I’m sorry,” you breathed, “I caused this. I shouldn’t have run away, I-”
“No!” Lucifer cut you off, “No, this is not your fault, you did nothing wrong. What Adam did to you was cruel. I won’t let you blame yourself for his actions!” He gripped your hands tighter as he spoke. You nodded wordlessly, almost too stunned to speak.
But as you found your voice, something else had caught your eye. Tiny little creatures all around you, lighting up the night sky. They were hard to spot until a little yellow light flickered intermittently to indicate where they were. Lucifer noticed your distracted stare and turned to see what had caught your attention. You didn’t notice at first, but the little creatures started to float closer and closer to Lucifer, as if they were drawn to him by some unseen force. Or…maybe you could see what exactly had caused them to swarm.
“They glow like you do,” you commented, watching them land on Lucifer’s robe, clawing up his sleeves slowly.
Lucifer chuckled and scooped up one from his arm and held it in his hands. “They’re fireflies,” he closed his hands around the one he caught, only leaving a tiny little gap. “Here, take a look.”
You leaned down to peer into his hands and watched as the little bug lit up its dark surroundings. You smiled and Lucifer opened his hands to let the little one fly away. “Why do they glow?” you asked curiously.
“That’s how they communicate!” he explained! “The creatures of this place can’t speak, so they have their own way of talking to one another.”
You let out a soft hum. “Well, I’m a little envious of them. And you.” Lucifer raised an eyebrow at your peculiar statement. “What I mean is, they can fly. Fly away to wherever they please. They seem to have more freedom than I do…”
Lucifer frowned but smiled after only a moment. He stood up straight and extended a hand down to you. “Perhaps I can give you that freedom, if only for a moment.” You took his outstretched hand and pulled yourself up. Without warning, Lucifer scooped you up in his arms, eliciting a small yelp from you. For his small stature, he was incredibly strong. You should have realized after you saw the way he handled Adam. You wrapped your arms around his neck in anticipation. “Hang on tight!”
With one powerful thrust of his wings, you two were airborne. A small scream escaped your throat as you hovered in the air high above the ground. You buried your face in the crook of his neck reactively. However, this caused Lucifer’s breath to hitch, which did not go unnoticed by you. You peered up at him curiously and noticed the familiar dash of yellow that covered his cheeks. He let out a deep breath and glanced back at you sheepishly. “I-It’s alright! I’ve got you.” You lifted your head more, looking out towards the seemingly endless sky. The moon above provided some light that shown on the earth far below, and from here you felt as though you could see everything. The once tall trees seemed like insignificant plants now, the newly formed mountains felt like little stones you could easily pick up and toss in any direction. If this is what the angels could see all the time, it’s no wonder they never left the sky.
Well, except for one.
“It’s amazing, Lucifer!” you exclaimed. “I never could have dreamed the world could look so lovely.”
“It pales in comparison to...” he started to say but stopped when you looked back to gaze into his eyes. “I mean…n-never mind that! I want to show you something else! Ready?” You smiled and nodded. Suddenly, Lucifer dive down at an incredible speed and stopped just before you hit the sparkling lake. He readjusted the way he held you and gripped your waist firmly. He held you like you weighed absolutely nothing. You locked your arms around him once more to secure yourself, but Lucifer shook his head. “I’m going to lower you down now, is that alright?” he asked sweetly. You were hesitant, afraid of being dropped. But you took a few deep breaths before nodding. “Do you trust me?”
“Of course I do!” you answered vehemently.
Your body dropped towards the water. You closed your eyes, expecting to be enveloped by the water. But you remained perfectly dry, except for the bottom of your feet. Lucifer held your palms as he floated above you, his smile brightening the night. You gripped his hands with all of your might. “Are you okay?”
“Y-Yes I’m alright,” you stuttered. “Just a little startled.”
“I’m sorry,” he apologized, “I should have given you a better warning. But here…” his calming voices soothed your anxiety almost immediately. “Can you try taking a step forward?” You looked down at your bare feet at the grazed the water below you. You placed one foot in front of the other, creating a small ripple of waves. You took another step. And another. And another. Before you knew it, you were walking on water with Lucifer guiding you every step of the way. His wings flapped along silently as you two made your way to the edge of the lake, towards solid ground. But the cool water below you felt almost as solid as the grass you were used to when Lucifer was by your side.
Before you knew it, Lucifer swung down in front of you, still lifting you effortlessly. He took your one free hand and placed it on his shoulder, letting his own find the small of your back. Your other hand became intertwined with his.
“Lucifer? What-” you tried to ask, but the man began to twirl you in a circle before you could finish.
“May I have this dance?” his sapphire eyes shone brightly as he held you, still leaving the slightest bit of space between the two of you.
“Oh…” you mumbled. “B-But I’ve never…”
“It’s alright, flower,” he smiled, “just follow me.”
With that, you felt yourself began to spin over the crystal lake below. You and the angel stayed suspended there for a minute or two, dancing under the pale moonlight. In a hushed tone, you could hear Lucifer hum a melodic tune as he clung to you, his wings fluttering with every motion. You couldn’t take your eyes off the angelic being in front of you. Your heart threatened to beat out of your chest, the pounded invading all of your other senses. You don’t know what came over you when you began to lean closer and closer to his angel’s face. But all of a sudden, you stopped spinning. Lucifer had frozen, his song halted, with both his mouth and eyes squeezing shut. You pulled away only slightly, before leaning back in and planting a small kiss on his cheek.
“Thank you, Lucifer,” you breathed.
Lucifer exhaled harshly as if he had been holding his breath, staring back at you in utter disbelief. He swallowed hard before speaking again.
“I-I, uhh, I…” he tried to utter. “You’re welcome. We…we should go back now.”
The two of you at last flew back to the bank of the lake, leaning against the large tree once again. A small shiver ran down your spine. You were so distracted by the wonders Lucifer had shone you that you didn’t realize how cold the night had become. Lucifer noticed your trembling and wrapped his large wings around you, shielding you from the wind. In an instant, you felt warmer. And protected. And safe. And loved. You smiled up at him, snuggling against his velvet- like feathers. He did his best to reciprocate, but you watched as his face fell.
"I can't stay," Lucifer lamented.
You sighed knowing in the back of your mind that this would be the case. Although you had really hoped deep down that he could. "I understand."
"I want to, though," he added. "I'd spend every moment I had with you down here if I could. But they..." he paused, shaking his head, "they weren't happy that I was down here to begin with. But they're not going to keep me away. I refuse."
"Lucifer?" you chimed in. "You said that the angels would be giving Adam a new bride." Lucifer nodded. "Then...will I get a new husband?" You were afraid of the answer. If Adam was the best heaven could come up with, how much worse would another one be?
"They wanted to," he began, "but I somehow managed to get them to reconsider, at least for the time being. I convinced them to watch how Adam behaved with the new woman before they gave you another man..." Lucifer seemed to trail off, unable to look you in the eyes anymore.
"Do I have a choice?" Lucifer didn't respond to you; he didn't even seem to register your words at all. His silence was answer enough.
A wave of drowsiness hit you suddenly; it was a long day and your body finally decided it needed some rest. "Well..." you yawned, scooting a little closer to him, resting your head on his shoulder without thinking, "...I know who'd I choose if I did." Lucifer froze once more as he felt your body go limp as you leaned against him.
"W-Who'd you choose?" he repeated back to you, attempting to get a response. But you didn't answer; you laid peacefully against your rescuer without a care in the world, your even breathing soft and peaceful. You only heard one final message before you drifted into unconsciousness...
"Sweet dreams, my starlight, I'll see you when you wake."
****
You woke up the next morning with a start. Memories of the previous day washing over you. It hadn’t been a dream…it was real. You were no longer under Adam’s control, you were free. And you owed everything to…
“Lucifer?” you called out to him, lifting your head from the grass. but there was no response. He told you last night that he couldn’t stay, but deep down you hoped that he would have.
Before you was a small glowing fire. It cackled against the dawn of the morning, welcoming you to a new day. Lucifer must have left it for you, and you were thankful since Adam was always the one who made the fire when you two spent the nights together. You shook your head, trying to force those unpleasant memories back into the recesses of your mind. You never had to think about him ever again.
The morning came and went, peaceful and uneventful. This was the first time in a long time where you felt hopeful for the days to come. You spent most of the early hours picking the various fruits from the trees that encircled your new refuge. After sampling the delicious treats, you decided your favorite was the bright red ones with a unique shape and subtle sweet taste. You didn’t have a name for them yet, but you were sure Lucifer could tell you.
The fruits themselves became harder and harder to reach as you gathered all of the ones within your reach. You tried to jump a few times but only the tips of your fingernails were able to graze it.
“One more time,” you told yourself as you pushed off the ground with all the strength you could conjure. But as you felt as though you could reach it this time, a pale hand reached across and snatched it from the tree. You landed on the ground with a thud and looked over to who had taken your prize, and then you smiled. Lucifer floated next to the tree, tossing the fruit back and forth between either hand as he laughed. “How long have you been watching me?” you asked with a smirk.
Lucifer rubbed the back of his head and landed gracefully on the ground next to you. “Only for a minute…or two…” He handed you the fruit which you gratefully accepted.
You took a bite of the delicious food. “What are these called, Lucifer? I think they may be the best things I’ve had!”
“Apples, dear one,” the angel replied. You continued to eat the apple until you got to its core.
“And these little black bits in the middle?” you questioned; your mouth still half full.
“Seeds!” he explained. “Oh, but don’t eat them! You’re supposed to bury them in the ground. With the proper care and patience, these little seeds can grow into large trees like this one!” Lucifer went on to explain the process of growing food, and you clung to every word he spoke. Listening to him was like a melody only you could truly understand.
Over the next several days, the two of you spent as much time together as possible. Lucifer showed you everything there was to see in the garden; the animals, the plants, the flowers, and all of the wonders this place had to offer. He had to leave every night, but he was able to show you how to make a fire on your own so that you could keep warm when he could not be there. Like clockwork, Lucifer would visit you the same time every day and leave to return to heaven just as you fell asleep. You knew the great risks he was taking to spend time with you and you made it known how much you appreciated his sacrifice, showering him with praise and appreciation every chance you got. You found it adorable how he would try to hide his face with his hat or his wings when complimenting him. It was sweet in a way you couldn’t fully articulate. All you knew is that it made you happy, and so did he.
But one day, Lucifer was late.
You paced back and forth beneath your apple tree, the one you would always meet him at. But he didn’t show up today. Terrible scenarios bombarded your thoughts; what if he was caught sneaking away? What if heaven forbid him to ever come back? What if you never got to see him again?
You inhaled a deep breath, trying your best to steady your heartbeat. You knew he’d be back; he’d never leave you here. Maybe he was just late today, perhaps there was nothing malicious happening. You had to keep this mindset lest you go insane with worry. You decided a dip in the lake would calm your nerves. You always found a certain tranquility there.
After disrobing, you stepped carefully into the crystal lake, letting the warm water flood over your body, your muscles relaxing and your mind now at ease. A small family of ducks floated not too far away from you as you submerged yourself up to your shoulders. You threw your head back, your hair soaking up the clear water, as you listened to the little ducks flap their wings, spraying water every which way.
But your unanswered prayers were finally heard as you heard Lucifer's voice ring out, laced with concern.
"Songbird, where are you?!" you heard him shout, his hands holding on tight to the robe he had gifted you.
"Over here, Lucifer!" you yelled from the water waving your hand back and forth excitedly, your worries quickly dissolving after seeing he had come searching for you.
The angel froze where he stood, staring blankly at the tree horizon off in the distance instead of you. "O-oh, thank goodness, you're alright!" he seemed to be saying to no one. You found it odd that Lucifer had not looked in your direction. “I-I’m so sorry I’m so late, I had some trouble escaping Heaven’s eyes today.”
You smiled sweetly. “It’s alright, Lucifer, you don’t need to apologize.” He still hadn’t moved since you started talking. “Is something the matter? You seem distracted.”
Lucifer clung to your robe even tighter. “Nope! No! I’m perfectly fine!” he tried to lie, but you remained unconvinced. He looked stressed and his golden flush did not go unnoticed. What he needed was to relax.
“Come join me, Lucifer,” you invited him, “you don’t look so well. The water is nice and warm! Perhaps it’ll help you feel better.”
You started making your way out of the water to offer your hand, but his reaction was far from anything you were prepared for. Lucifer had dropped your robe immediately, his wings now nearly covering his entire body. You stopped your movement entirely.
“N-No, I promise I’m fine!” he continued to fib. “Could you…maybe, possibly…take a few steps back…please?”
You did as you asked and sank beneath the water once more. You had no idea why Lucifer was acting so strangely; your happiness had almost instantly turned into sadness and guilt. “I’m sorry,” you apologized, “have I done something wrong?”
“Oh! No! No, of course not! You haven’t done anything wrong!” He seemed genuinely concerned after hearing your apology which made you feel even more confused than you already were.
“I don’t understand,” you explained. “I must have upset you. You wouldn’t have asked me to step back otherwise. Even now, you’re hiding yourself from me.”
Lucifer peaked through his feathers and saw you had gone back to your original place in the water. His wings unfolded immediately, finally looking you in the eyes. “You haven’t upset me, I promise you. I didn’t mean to make you feel like you had, please forgive me. I…It’s hard to explain…” His voice trailed off as his eyes shifted to the ground. He inhaled deeply, then sighed heavily. “I never want to be the reason you're sad. Never. I’ll join you…if you still want me to.”
You gave him a weak smile and nodded slowly. You could tell something was still off with his behavior, but you knew he would never want to upset you. You knew him. This was his way of atoning. You decided not to push the issue further, at least for now. Whatever he was talking about, it was clear he was uncomfortable.
“Could you…turn around for a moment?” he asked quietly. Another odd request, but you did as he asked, your back now towards him. After only a moment or two, you hear the gentle swashing of the water behind you. And only a moment more before he spoke up again. "O-Ok, you can turn around now."
You did so, but it was clear that he was still maintaining his distance much to your disappointment. He smiled awkwardly at you; the water coming up just about to his torso. You caught yourself staring at his chest, his bright pale skin reflecting off the water. You took a single step closer, not wanting to scare him off.
"You can come closer, you know. I won't bite," you teased him.
Lucifer chuckled nervously. "I-I know you won't, but uhh, I think it's best for the both of us if I stay right here!"
You rolled your eyes at him, "Ok, well then, I'll come to you!"
He noticed as you took another step towards him and he mirrored your actions by taking a step back. "I'm not sure that's such a good idea, dove. I..."
"Don't be afraid, Lucifer," you cut him off. "Let me help you. If you’re not comfortable looking my way, why don't you turn around for me." Hesitantly, he obliged, now facing the shore line. Slowly, you approached your friend. When you were finally close enough, your arms stretched out and rested on his shoulders. His whole body tensed at your touch. He's never responded to you like that before. "It's alright," you cooed as you began to work your fingers into his muscles. Lucifer let go of the breath he was holding, his shoulders relaxing as well as his wings.
"This...this feels nice," Lucifer admitted. "Thank you. And I'm sorry again."
"For what?" you asked as your hands continued to work on his stiff body.
Lucifer sighed. "For being late. For acting strangely. And especially for upsetting you."
"You don't need to apologize," you reassured him. "I know you would never want to hurt me intentionally." You watched as his wings twitched under your delicate touch. The water slid off of his feathers easily as if they we resistant to it. The urge to reach out and touch them was growing increasingly harder to ignore. "Lucifer, may I touch them?"
He knew what you were referring to; he cocked his head to the side, still not looking at you directly. "I-I, I mean uhh, I suppose…you can. Just...be gentle, please. They can be very sensitive."
With the most delicate touch, you began to stroke his soft feathers between your fingers. Almost instantly, a breathy moan could be heard from Lucifer. You continued your ministrations, admiring their unearthly beauty. Your hands made their way down further to where his wings had sprouted from his back. You gently pinched the base of his wings, causing Lucifer to jolt away in surprise with a yelp.
“GA-AAHH!” he cried, almost falling face forward into the water. “Ok! I-I think that’s enough of that! Thank you, b-but I think I’m good to go!” The flustered Angel started to make his way to the shoreline but you were quick to grab his wrist before he could get too far.
“I’m sorry, Lucifer,” you spoke softly, “I didn’t mean to cause you any pain. Please stay…”
A flash of panic flashed across his face. “No! No, I’m not hurt! It’s just…” his head fell, gazing at the water beneath him, and gulped. “I have to go! Please forgive me for this…” His wings stretched out behind him, and with one giant flap, caused a more than forceful splash of water in your direction. You let go of his wrist to try and shield yourself from his attack. Water doused you, with some unfortunately finding its way into your mouth. You coughed furiously, trying to expel it. You were blinded for a few seconds before rubbing your eyes and finding Lucifer who was nearly dressed again. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” he called out to you, but his apologies didn’t stop you from trying to chase him down. Enough was enough, you needed an explanation. With his back turned, he had no time to prepare for your counterattack. Just as he turned to see you had gotten within inches of him, you pounced. You knocked him hard to the ground with a thud and pinned his arms above his head. He squirmed beneath you but you would not relent.
“Lucifer, what’s the matter with you?” you demanded. “You’ve never acted like this before, what changed? Please, tell me what I’ve done wrong!”
Lucifer continued to struggle against your grip. You found this odd, knowing full well he had every chance to overpower you. But he didn’t.
“My flower, p-please,” he begged, “please let me go!” His eyes trailed to your bare chest only for a brief moment before forcing himself to stare back at you, his entire face a shade of pale yellow.
You shook your head. “You can free yourself, why don’t you?”
“…I can’t risk hurting you…I won’t…” he murmured.
Your grip loosed on him slightly as your body began to tremble. "You hurt me by not being honest. I don't understand! I-" Your rant was cut short when you felt a sudden jab in your abdomen. Almost as if a bump had suddenly formed underneath you. You glanced down and noticed precisely what had caused the odd sensation. "O-Oh..." was all you could mutter.
Lucifer's whines had only increased with your discovery. "Please..." his voice was barely audible now. "You have to let me go..." You watched as a single tear fell from his eye, sliding down his flushed cheeks. You didn't know angels could cry.
Wordlessly, you finally released your hold on him, backing away slowly and sitting on your knees. Your garment that had been given to you the first day you let Lucifer laid next to you, wrinkled and disheveled. You grabbed it and pressed it tight against your chest, not wanting to upset Lucifer further.
You understood now.
A portal opened up as Lucifer stood to his feet, not daring to look in your direction. "I'll...I'll be back later tonight," he spoke softly, "I owe you an explanation, you deserve at least that much. But right now...I can't. I have to go. I'm sorry, starlight. I'm so sorry." With his solemn apology, Lucifer disappeared into the portal behind him.
You sat there in the grass in silence, refusing to move for the longest time. You went to tuck your hair behind your head, but your heart stopped. Lucifer's feather: it was gone. In a panic, your head swiveled, looking in every direction you possibly could when you finally spotted it. His feather sat alone in the calm water. Shakily you stood up and reached down and held it delicately in the palm of your hands.
And in that moment, all you could do was cry.
****
Hours had passed and Lucifer had still not returned. Night had fallen not too long ago and you found yourself huddled up next to the fire you had made. Tonight was particularly cold. Your legs you pressed tightly you your chest as your arms and head rested in your knees. You didn’t even know what you would say when Lucifer did eventually arrive, this was all…such a mess. A part of you just wanted to be left alone, but the other had a burning desire to hold him as close to you as possible. The two sides were raging war within you when you finally heard the familiar sound of another portal opening behind you. You didn’t dare to turn around.
Silently, Lucifer made his way over to you, sitting down next to you, but far enough away where there wouldn’t be any contact. You finally turned your head to look at him. The angel removed the hate from his head, fiddling with the brim. He looked so…defeated.
“I know I’ve said this way too often today,” he began to speak, “but songbird, I am deeply and truly sorry for what happened. You are not to blame for any of this. And if you told me that you never want to see me again…” he paused, not wanting to finish that thought.
“Lucifer?” he looked up at you, his eyes glossy. “My world was changed because of you. I’m safe because of you. And…I’m happy because of you. Why would I never want to see you again. That’s not a life worth living, not to me.”
Lucifer wiped his eyes, the smallest smile forming on his lips. “How can you be so understanding, so forgiving? Even some of the angels in heaven don’t show the kind of mercy you do. I mean, what happened today was…”
“Not your fault,” you finished his sentence. You shifted closer to him, Lucifer remained unmoving. “I know I haven’t existed for very long, and you don’t have to explain, I know what happened to you.” He buried his face in his lap at your confession. “Lucifer, you don’t need to be ashamed. It’s natural, is it not? It’s just a, what’s it called…a physical reaction? I just wish you would have been honest with me from the start.”
Lucifer only shook his head in anguish. “How could I?” he choked out. “It’s only natural for humans, that’s the way it’s supposed to be! This…this is forbidden amongst angels! Who am I to defy their orders when I’m already on everyone’s bad side! He stood up suddenly and began pacing back and forth. “This is a disaster! The last thing I wanted to do is hurt you and that’s all I’ve done! No wonder Heaven doesn’t take me seriously, all I do is cause trouble! It’s just mistake after mistake after mistake with me! Maybe…maybe they’re right…” He plopped back down onto the ground and stared up at the stars. “I’m just a foolish seraphim who’s in way over his head…”
You crawled over to him tentatively, your face hovering over his. You shoved away his messy hair away from his eyes. “Do you think finding me in the garden that day was a mistake?”
“No…”
“Do you think saving me from Adam was a mistake?”
“No, of course not!” he sat up straight.
“Then, do you think this is a mistake?” You leaned in too fast for Lucifer to react. Your eyes fell shut as your lips connected, but only for a moment. You pulled back only to realize that the angel became a statue, his eyes wide with a mixture of fear and desire. “Lucifer, are you alright?” He didn’t respond, he only continued to stare blankly at you, almost as if he were in a trance. “Maybe one more could bring you back…” your body fell forward once more, but this time Lucifer’s arms caught you, pushing you back at your shoulders.
“Y-You…” he began to stutter, “you kissed me…” You nodded sheepishly. “But why?…”
“Because I love you, Lucifer,” you blurted out without much thought. “Because you make every day in the garden better. Because I couldn’t imagine my life now without you in it! I don’t want you to think those terrible things about yourself because they are not true! I don’t care what anyone in Heaven has said, they are wrong! They wanted me to live my life with Adam, do you not think that they are capable of making mistakes? I thank my lucky stars that I never laid with him because that would-”
“Wait, wait, slow down!” Lucifer interjected. “You never laid with Adam?!”
You stuck your tongue out in disgust. “I would never. He’s heartless and cruel and wicked. Everything you’re not.” Lucifer gulped, trying to steady his breath. “I was blessed that he never tried to force me, but I knew he didn’t care for me. All he saw was a servant, someone to take care of all his needs without ever considering mine. But you…” you pushed back against Lucifer’s arms, trying to get closer. His resistance weakened but you could tell he was still hesitant.
“Wait…” he breathed. You sat up straight and grabbed a hold of his hand, interlacing your fingers. “This is…a lot to process, flower. My mind is pulling me in so many different directions…” He grabbed your other hand, now squeezing both, and turned fully to face you. “If…If we go through with this, there’s no going back. If Heaven ever learns of this, there’s no telling what they might do. But I swear to you that I will do everything in my power to protect you. Are you willing to take that risk?”
You gripped his hand tight and leaned your head forward into his. “I am. But only if you are too.”
“Nothing on Heaven or Earth could keep me away from you.” With his confession, your lips collided once again, and you breathed a sigh of relief. Everything around you disappeared, all that mattered in that moment was you and him. His kiss was tender, delicate; he kissed you as if you were made of the most pristine glass. But you didn’t want it any other way. “I love you, my little dove,” he whispered between breaths. “My live for you is far greater than all of the stars in the sky. Do you believe that?” You nodded and smiled, pulling him into another kiss. You found yourself lying flat on the ground, Lucifer hovering over you as he continued to devour you. His hands slowly traced down the sides of your body, stopping at your hips. You needed to feel him.
“Can I remove this?” you asked him, pulling on your garment.
“M-Mhmm,” he mumbled. “O-Only if you’re comfortable.”
“Promise not to panic again?” you joked. His face flushed as you sat up and removed your clothing. You watched as Lucifer shut his eyes and inhaled deeply. “It’s alright, Luci, you can look.”
He peaked with one eye and exhaled the breath he had been holding. He let his other eye open, and all he could do was stare. You felt no shame as his eyes finally fully examined your body for the first time. His breath hitched as he climbed back over you.
“Beautiful,” Lucifer sighed. “So, so beautiful…” He leaned down to kiss you once more, but you pressed a finger to his lips playfully.
“I think it’s your turn,” you suggested.
Lucifer laughed nervously. “R-Right, right. Only fair, I suppose.”
He sat up straight and ever so slowly began to unbutton his robe. You noticed his fingers shaking more and more with each button that came undone. In your mind, he couldn’t look that much different from Adam; he’d never worn anything to cover himself. With Lucifer last button undone, he finally let the sleeves fall from his arms, his robe falling to the ground. When you finally saw him, you knew it was the most beautiful body you had ever seen. You couldn’t stop yourself from staring at his very apparent erection. For once, you found it difficult to find the words to say.
“I…I umm,” you stuttered out. Your face felt hotter than it ever has been before. Something in your stomach ached. It wasn’t a pain, but a craving. “I didn’t know they could be different sizes! Yours is bigger than Adam’s…”
Lucifer’s wings instinctively covered his body at your remark. “Sorry, sorry! Instincts!,” you heard his muffled voices through the feathers. “I just…angels do not undress in front of one another. It’s very much frowned upon.”
You crawled over to him, sticking your hand through his feathers to see his flushed yellow face. “Well, it’s a good thing I’m not an angel then, isn’t it?”
Lucifer’s first set of wings unfurled from his face, flashing you a cute but embarrassed smile. “But you are,” he retorted, “the most beautiful angel to ever exist!”
The rest of his wings fell back, he pulled you close to kiss you once again. You let your mouth fall open in desperation, and Lucifer took that as a sign to deepen the kiss. His tongue slid past your wanting lips and found yours which was more than eager to please. His hands settled on your hips once more, but that wasn’t enough. Carefully, you reached down and grabbed his hand and placed it on one of your breasts. Lucifer squeaked in surprise and pulled away from the kiss.
“You’re so cute,” you cooed, kissing his forehead. “Don’t worry, it’s alright. I-I want you to feel me.” Lucifer sighed heavily and started gently kneading at your breasts. The way he touched you felt so good, so right. You couldn’t imagine a better feeling. You laid back down while Lucifer continued with his motions, your nipples now being pinched between his soft fingers. Quiet moans escaped your throat while Lucifer began kissing down your neck and chest, sucking on your delicate skin. He ventured down to your breast, taking your nipple into his mouth, his tongue making circling motions around it. He switched to the other one after a little bit, giving your other breast the same attention. You began to whimper, it felt good. So good. And you needed more. Lucifer raised his head and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips.
“We’re going to take this slow,” he promised. “I’m going to help you get prepared for what follows, is that alright?” You nodded eagerly. He couldn’t help but chuckle just a little bit. One hand held your head while the other wandered down your body and hovered over your bare sex. “If you need me to stop, please promise me that you’ll tell me immediately. This…shouldn’t hurt, but I’m not taking any chances. I’ve never done anything like this before, but…I do know what should be done. Do you promise?”
“I promise, Luci,” you smiled. “I trust you.”
He blushed. “I like that name…Luci. Your Luci…” He kissed you once again as you felt his fingers finally touch your womanhood. You gasped at the contact, and his hand pulled away instantly. “Are you alright? Did it hurt?”
You shook your head furiously. “No, no! It didn’t hurt! It’s just…surprised me is all. Please, keep going.”
With a nod, he leaned back in to kiss you, his hands finding its way back down to where it was previously. At last, his fingers found your sensitive nub; he began to rub it. Very slowly at first as to not startle you, but slowly he began to speed up rhythmically. His lips captured your moans. The pressure in your stomach was something you had never experienced before, it felt as though the feeling kept building and building inside of you as if it was aching to release. You felt his fingers trail down just a little bit further, stroking your already soaked folds. He pushed one finger inside, and you yelped. Not in pain, no, but in pleasure. Lucifer took notice and almost took his hand away before you stopped him.
“I-I’m fine, I’m fine…just…felt good. Please don’t stop, Luci…” He did as you asked and inserted his finger fully inside you once again. Pumping it in and out, in and out, in and out. Your body conformed to his movements; your whimpers filled the night sky as he added a second finger into you. That pressure you felt was building even more now, something in your stomach felt as though it could snap at any moment. Unfortunately, Lucifer removed his hand from you and a pathetic whine fell from your lips.
“I’m sorry, starlight,” he apologized, “I just…I want to see something…” You watched as he licked the fingers than had been ravishing you. All of a sudden, his eyes became wide, and he stared down back at you. “My love, your taste is…absolutely divine. I want to try something if you’ll allow me.” You blushed at him, nodding in agreement. Lucifer made his way down your body and settled his face directly between your thighs. You felt your heart threatening to beat out of your chest as he peered up at you. “Let me know if you need me to stop at any point.”
Before you could respond, you felt his tongue drag itself up your drenched slit. You nearly screamed at the sensation, but this time, it didn’t deter Lucifer. He began to devour your pussy like a man starved, his tongue skillfully moving along your folds and your clit. He added his digits back into your heat as his mouth continued to consume you. It was so much, almost too . That pressure was back and you felt it even more than before.
“L-Lucifer,” you cried out, “Lucifer I-I feel s-something, I don’t…I-I can’t…” you words failed you as you felt that odd coil tighten to the point of no return.
“It’s okay, little dove, it’s okay,” Lucifer reassured you between his sloppy licks. “Your body’s responding to the stimulation. Relax your body as much as you can. Your body is building towards a climax. It'll be euphoric, I promise."
You did as Lucifer said untensed your muscles which made his continued ministrations even more intense. You mindlessly gripped his hair as wordless moans filled the air. You felt your body coming closer and closer to its release. You tried to warn him but no words could be formed in that state you were in. With one final cry, you felt your muscles clench around his fingers, your release spilling out of you at a rapid pace. Lucifer refused to move however as he lapped up everything your body had to offer. When the spasms stopped, your breathing slowed. Lucifer crawled back up your body with a lovestruck expression, the remainder of your release still shining on his chin. You couldn't help but feel embarrassed.
"What...what was that?" you asked still catching your breath.
"An orgasm," Lucifer explained. "It's what happens to the body when it's receiving extreme pleasure. Are you okay though? Was that too much?"
You smiled up at him. "No, it wasn't too much. It was perfect. Thank you..." You sat up to kiss him, the faint taste of your release on his lips. "So, does that mean your body is capable of the same thing?"
Lucifer suddenly became flustered. "O-Oh, well, I mean yes, b-but it's a little bit different in my case. What I mean is, it would be the same as any other man."
You pushed on his chest gently so you could sit up properly. "Can I try to return the favor, then?" Lucifer's wings fluttered behind him as you watched his face change into the deepest shade of yellow you had ever seen. "Oh golly...that's...that's very kind of you, but you r-really don't have to do that. I...It's uhhh...oh, heaven help me..."
You giggled at his reaction, shifting yourself to your knees. "You made me feel so good, Luci, let me make you feel good too. Please?"
"O-Okay," he managed to whisper. Your shifted your gaze down, finally getting a good look at his girthy length. It was impressive to say the least, and in all honestly you felt a little intimidated. It stood firm as you carefully wrapped your soft hands around the base. Lucifer's breath hitched at the sudden contact. "D-Do you know what to do?"
Your face shifted into a slight scowl. "I think so. I had the misfortune of catching Adam doing this to himself more times than I'd like to remember," you recalled and shook your head. "But from what I remember, it went like this..." Your hand finally shifted around his cock, pumping him slowly. Immediately, Lucifer's head found your shoulder as he whimpered against you. You relished in the feeling of having an all-powerful angel at your mercy with a few simple strokes. Your pace quickened after a short while, your pumps becoming more and more rapid, but never rough. Lucifer cried into your shoulder as you continues to touch him.
"M-My flower, o-oh my...it feels s-so good. Y-You feel so wonderful...please don't stop, please..." You happily did as he asked, feeling his lips press against your neck. Your hand continued its motion when you felt something drip onto it. You looked down and noticed something clear was leaking from the tip. Curiously, you took your other hand and wiped it up, bringing it to your mouth for a taste. It was...strange, but not in a bad way. All of a sudden, you had an idea. Without warning, you leaned down and gave a tentative lick to the head of his cock. Lucifer gasped as if he couldn't breathe. "W-What are you doing?!" asked in a panic.
"I wanted to taste you like you did me," you responded innocently. You took another lick, this time pressing on his slit. The cry that erupted from Lucifer's lips were heavenly.
"Love, p-please," he begged, "you don't need to do thaaaahhh-t" you silenced his protests as you wrapped your whole mouth around the tip, your tongue swirling around it furiously. You hand didn't stop its movement either as it worked in tandem with your mouth, carefully avoiding the use of your teeth. You felt Lucifer buck his hips a few times, but not enough to overwhelm you. You could tell he was getting close to his release as his body began to tremble with every little motion. But just before you know he would come undone; he pulled you back gently away from his now leaking cock. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry, I-I had to stop you..."
"Oh," you sighed, "Did I do something wrong?"
Lucifer shook his head. "On the contrary love, you did everything right. Almost a little too well. I was almost on the verge of...you know."
You tilted your head in confusion. "Then why did you want me to stop?"
Lucifer laid you down again, his glassy eyes never leaving yours. "Because...I need you. I need you now. I know how selfish that sounds, b-but please...I-"
You cut him off with a kiss to his lips, his eyes falling closed. "I need you too, Lucifer. I want to be yours."
With little hesitation, Lucifer lined his cock up against your soaking entrance. He held your face in his other hand and pressed his forehead against yours. "Are you sure about this? Is this what you want?"
"I want you Lucifer, all of you. I love you."
With that, Lucifer smiled down at you and pulled you in for a kiss. "I love you too. I'm going to push in now, alright. If you feel any pain, tell me and we'll stop." You agreed. With one final shaky breath, Lucifer began to sheath himself inside you at an agonizingly slow pace. You felt your walls adjust around his girth, the familiar pressure returning once more. At last, he bottomed out inside you, the both of you finding it hard to breathe at this moment. "How are you feeling? Does it hurt?"
"N-No," you answered quietly. "I...I feel whole."
The angel couldn't help but smile. "I feel the same way. As if you were made for me. You tell me when I can move."
You gave him confirmation, and with that, Lucifer dragged himself out of you lethargically to the tip just to push in again slowly. IT was perfect he was perfect. You never felt more alive and you wished you could never leave this moment. Lucifer's hips picked up the pace, his cock dragging in and out of you. Both of your moans filling the night sky.
"Luci...Lucifer..." you whimpered in between thrusts. "Feels so good, so good, I-I love you Lucifer! Please keep going, please! I feel it again...so close..." You wrapped your arms around his back, touching the base of his wings which caused him to yelp.
"Oh heavens..." Lucifer whined against you. "You're squeezing me so tight, my dear, feels...oh my...feels perfect. I love you too...so so much..." His thrusts increase to an almost inhuman speed. The coil you felt before tightened once more, you felt yourself coming undone fast. And by the way your lover was crying out, he was too. "I-I'm close too, love, very close...I...I...I can't...HNNGG-GGAAAHHHH!" With his final cry, you felt Lucifer empty himself into you as you spasmed around him at the same time, your juices mixing together inside of you. HIs wings fluttered as you felt his cock continue to twitch inside of your gummy walls. You found yourself in a complete state of ecstasy as you clawed at his back at the peak of your release.
Lucifer nearly collapsed on top of you as he finished, his breathing staggard and labored as yours was. After a few minutes, he removed himself from you and laid next to you, his wings falling over you in a soft embrace.
"How do you feel?" Lucifer asked quietly as he pushed the hair that had fallen in your face away. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"
You smiled and shook you head. "No, I'm not hurt. I feel...so wonderful. Thank you, Lucifer."
"As do I," Lucifer murmured, returning the smile. "Can I...hold you?"
"Of course you can," You shifted your body as close to him as possible as he threw his arms around you.
"I've wanted to hold you since the moment I met you," he confessed, "I didn't feel worthy of you. Of your love. I was a fool."
You responded by planting a small peck on his lips and watched as his face flushed again. "You're more than worthy. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise." You smile faded as you realized what time had come. "I supposed...you have to leave soon, is that right? I don't want Heaven to-"
Lucifer's arms wrapped around you even tighter, forcing your head against his chest before you could finish speaking. "No, not tonight. Not ever again. I don't care what Heaven has to say. Not anymore. I'm yours now and nothing will ever change that. Whatever happens, we'll face them together. And I swear on my soul, I will not let them take you away from me."
You felt tears run down your face as you held Lucifer close. He was yours now, and you were his. You knew that whatever was to come, he would never leave your side. You two were bound together now. For all of eternity.
~~~~
IT'S FUCKING DONE, I HAVE SURGERY TOMORROW, GOODNIGHT EVERYONE, I'LL SEE YOU WHEN I'M CONSCIOUS AGAIN!!! PLEASE EXCUSE ANY MISTAKES, I'LL FIX THEM WHEN I CAN!!
EDIT: SURGERY WAS A SUCCESS! 💜
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@sunflower-reaper @6esiree @writteninlunarlight-years
#hazbin hotel#lucifer morningstar#hazbin lucifer#hazbin hotel lucifer#lucifer x reader#lucifer smut#my writing#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel smut#IT'S DONE AT LAST#THIS SHIT TOOK FOREVER AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH#OF COURSE AO3 IS DOWN WHAT THE FUCK MAN LMAOOOOO
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- slow ride ch2
feat. sinner!adam x fem!hotel worker!reader
previous chapter || series masterlist || next chapter (wip)
warnings: NSFW, more substance use in this one, a bit of angst?, readers emotional issues
a/n: i feel like my writing sucks esp in this chapter cause im sorta rusty and sick so i cant even tell if this makes sense but oh well😭😭😭 anyway pls send me hazbin reqs!!!!! having the worst brainrot lately esp for this horrible man!!!
wc: 2.9k
“I'm not breaking up inside / I'm much to proud to moan / Baby, please come home”
Oh my god. What did I just do? Why did I do this?
You turn your head to look at Adam where he’s lying on the other side of the bed, and find his expression closely mirrors your own. Pure disbelief is written on his features, and you grimace, turning to look back at the ceiling.
After a moment, you sit up, grabbing your box of cigarettes and a lighter off your bedside table. Once lit, you swing your feet off the bed to reach for shirt and now ripped panties, standing up when you’re partially dressed. You hear Adam sit up behind you.
“Soo, that was… uhhh…” He trails off, mouth hanging open as he thinks of what to say.
“Let’s… not speak about this again,” You say carefully as you turn back to face him.
“Yeah. yeah, i’m good with that,” He says quickly, finding his robes off the floor. You’re surprised he doesn’t say anything about the smoke.
You cross the room to get your pants off the floor, pulling them up as Adam grabs his jacket. You pull up your fly, and look up to see Adam’s staring at you with an expression you can’t read. His eyes flicker to your lips, and he starts to lean closer.
“Kiss me and i’ll cut your fuckin’ tongue out,” you say as you turn your head away.
“Oookay then. I’ll, uh, see ya,” For once, he has no snarky comment or crude joke to make as he straightens up and leaves your room.
After that, you told yourself never again. It happened once, it’s out of your system, it’s done. A one time thing.
But then it happens a second time.
“It’s a disgusting habit! All your clothes, your whole room fuckin’ reeks!”
“Are you tryin’ to get me to loose my temper here? ‘Cause i’m about to shove you out that fucking window!”
“And look how angry you get, you fucking fiend, it’s been like 2 hours!”
“Why don’t you mind your goddamn business?”
You raise an arm to hit him, but he catches your elbow, twisting you around so your back is to him and he can hold you in place. You struggle to break from his grip, when suddenly-
“Oh my god,” You deadpan, but your voice doesn’t come out as disgusted as you expected at the feeling of something hard poking into your lower back.
“Okay, this is not my fault-“ Adam says quickly.
“You- fucking perv!” You spit, but your words hold no weight when he flips you again and lifts you up, placing you on the counter and you make no effort to struggle. You spread your legs so he can slot between them as items pushed out of the way cascade off the counter, falling to the floor with loud crashes.
You then told yourself that would be the last time. But not even you fully believed yourself. And once it happened a third, fourth, and fifth time, you just accepted this is something that happens now. You’re not proud of it- some of you hates yourself, but another part of you finds a a sick, primal pleasure in it. It’s the only guaranteed way for you to get him to shut up, if only for a few minutes. The fight for dominance- fuuck you’re messed up, huh?
Thinking of the humiliation you’d feel if any of the others found out- oh god, how could you look Alastor in the eyes again- you change absolutely nothing about your behavior around Adam. On the surface, nothing has changed at all. You two still bicker and argue all the time, if anything, worse than ever. Yet the other members can feel something’s up, that something changed. Adam’s insults feel more hollow. He always said shit just to rile you up, but there was usually an undertone of truth to his words. Not anymore- it’s all stupid shit that everybody can tell he doesn’t care about. Nobody says anything about it, though, until-
“What the fuck are you smilin’ for?” Angel’s voice makes Adam jump as he enters, sitting down on the couch beside him.
“What-? I wasn’t smiling,” Adam quickly denies. “What are you talking about?”
“Oh my god- are you’re gettin’ laid?” Angel grins, sitting up. The look on Adam’s face tells him everything, and he can’t help but laugh. “Oh, you so are! No wonder you’ve been in such a good mood lately,”
“Uh, duh i’m getting laid, I’m Adam, I’m the origin-“
“Yeah, yeah, original dick. But that’s not what I mean and you know it.” Angel grins widely, and Adam can feel his face heating up. Oh god- why is he blushing? Since when does he care? He pushes the thought from his head.
“…You don’t know her,” Adam decides to say, crossing his arms and turning back to face the TV, hoping Angel will just leave it at that.
“Try me,” Angel leans closer, looking intently at Adam’s expression. When Adam says nothing, Angel laughs again.
“Oh my god I so know her,”
Adam grits his teeth but says nothing as Angel laughs.
“Okay, fine, don’t tell me who you’re havin’ weird secret kinky sex with,” Angel shrugs, turning to face the TV. “I’ll find out eventually,”
That makes Adam sweat.
You can’t help but laugh, nearly spitting whisky everywhere while Husk chuckles to himself. Sure, it’s a bit trite, ranting to the bartender about your shitty day while he pours you a stiff drink, but Husk could always make you laugh about it, and call you out on your bullshit if needed. He was real, and you liked that about him. Plus, it beat drinking alone when none of your other friends wanted to party on a Wednesday.
“-and not a crazy bitch like I’m a crazy bitch, crazy like she lit her mom’s hair on fir-“
“Husk holy shit!”
Both of you look in the direction of Angel Dust’s voice as he runs from the hallway towards you both. He leans over the bar, eager to share whatever news he had.
“Adam’s fucking somebody- somebody here!”
You choke on your whisky, spitting it back into the glass. Angel and Husk both look at you with a raised brow.
“My bad,” is all you say. you can’t think of anything else that would play it off, so you just quietly wipe off your face while Angel recounts his encounter with Adam. You feel an eye twitch- you could strangle that prick for being so conspicuous.
“You’re quiet, Y/N,” Angel says in a teasing tone.
“I just could not care less if I tried,” You say back, firmly but with a shrug, and you hope it suffices as an acceptable explanation, and that you come off as your usual apathetic self. You finish your whisky, and luckily, Angel doesn’t give you any more shit. Slightly unsettled by that interaction, you avoid Adam for the next few days.
Late one evening, everybody’s gone up to their rooms and the hotel is quiet. You’ve already eaten, smoked, brushed your teeth and put on pajamas, but there’s nothing good on TV and you’re bored and high and just want a task to keep busy. So you wander aimlessly into the kitchen and find yourself doing the dishes that Charlie was too stressed out to do earlier.
As you scrub brown charred bits off a pan, you find your stupid weed-addled brain wandering to Adam. You haven’t fought with him in a while, mostly because you’d run away before he had the chance to start, but still. It feels weird, being so calm lately. No wonder you’re bored. It’s the way things used to be at the hotel, before he arrived. You guess you hadn’t realized how used to his presence you’ve gotten. Gross. You cringe at the thought.
Luckily, your phone starts to vibrate on the counter, giving you a distraction. You pick up and hold it between your ear and shoulder without looking at the caller ID.
“Yo, where are you right now?”
Of course.
“Adam? What the fuck, when did you get a phone?” You snort. When you realize you’re smiling you clear your throat and force your face to relax.
“Whatever. Can you come upstairs?”
You pause. He sounds slightly odd.
“What, like, to your room?” You raise an eyebrow. “Why?”
“ohmyfuckinggod- can you not be difficult for fucking once and just do what I ask?” Then, as an afterthought, he adds “Please?”
Damn, okay. You don’t say anything for a moment, thinking maybe you’re just smacked and he’s being normal.
“Suuuure… Just uh, gimme a minute,” You say carefully, putting the dishes down. Then, he hangs up on you. What a dick.
Unbeknownst to you, while you’ve been thinking about him, he’s been thinking about you way more.
You’ve been avoiding him- obviously. Not unexpected, but it pissed him off to no end. He’s fucking Adam! Who are you to ignore him? Aren’t you supposed to be keeping an eye on him, anyway?
By now, the others have started to accept him- including them in their plans, drinking with him, no longer leaving a room when he enters- so he doesn’t really need a chaperone anymore. Despite this, it still feels wrong. Even in a room with every other patron of the hotel, he’d started to notice when you weren’t there.
He didn’t even notice he was starting to miss you at first. It wasn’t until he and Charlie were seated at the bar, and he drank more than he probably should have, that he mentioned you were avoiding him.
“What’dya, miss her?” Husk asked.
“Awww, Adam!” He still remembers the look on her and Husker’s faces. “You are starting to change! That’s so sweet of you!”
And then because she was drunk she kept rambling about it for like 30 minutes, but he doesn’t remember the rest of what she said, just the utter humiliation he felt. He shut up for the rest of the night to avoid spilling his guts any more, but Husk- the annoying fucker- still gives him knowing looks every now and then.
And after Nifty had washed his sheets, and he’d noticed that his pillows lost the scent of cigarettes, perfume, and shampoo you’d left behind, he knew he was royally fucked.
The worst of all, though, is that he feels helpless to feeling these emotions- and even worse, he doesn’t want to stop feeling them. Before he’d even noticed it, he was thinking about you all the time, and he was fine with it. The embarrassment was killing him, even though, supposedly, nobody knew.
On this particular night, he’d probably had just a tad too much beer with his dinner, because when he’d returned to his room and flopped on his bed, there was a little bug in the back of his brain that kept whining about how empty it felt. He tossed and turned for a bit, just wanting to sleep it off, but he eventually gave up, reaching for his phone.
“Adam?” Before you’re finished knocking, Adam jumps up to get the door, pulling you inside quickly. You make a noise of surprise as he scoops you up immediately, not saying anything as he carries you to his bed.
“Damn, needy, huh?” You laugh. This time, it’s him telling you to shut up as he tosses you onto the bed and crawls over you.
You sit up slightly to help him get your shirt off, and then his lips are on your neck, trailing down to your chest as he unclips your bra.
“Haven’t seen you in a while,” He says with a casual shrug as his hands run up your torso to grope at your tits.
“mm,” You hum, arching your back into his touch. “missed this?” You smile sarcastically. Missed you, he thinks.
“Sure missed these,” He pushes the thought away and grins back, squeezing your chest for emphasis. He pulls back briefly to rid himself of his own shirt, then bends back down to press more kisses to your flesh. He looks up, staring at your expression as he takes one of your nipples in his mouth, reveling in the whimper he’s rewarded with.
“fuckin’ perfect tits…” He mumbles into your chest before nipping at your skin. You let your eyes shut as his free hand slides down, under the band of your shorts and his finger brushes the hot skin beneath, skimming over your lips. Adam thumbs at your clit through your panties, relishing in the whine he rips from your throat.
Impatiently, you shift your hips up to slide off your shorts and panties, then reach to tug at his belt loops to signal he should do the same. When he looks up and sees the desperate look on your face, he decides not to keep you waiting, and pulls back to rip off his pants and boxers.
You guess avoiding him these past few days has affected you, too, because you’re surprisingly desperate. You sit up, wrapping your fingers around his cock, smearing his arousal across his length, and whatever he had been planning to say dies and comes out a needy garble of nonsense that makes you snicker.
To your surprise, he has no quip as he crawls over you and pushes himself between your legs. He bites back a gasp when you rub the head of his cock between your folds, a groan following a moment after as he begins pushing into you.
Your thighs are trembling by the time he’s fully inside of you, and you wrap your legs around his waist weakly while you adjust to the stretch.
He sits up fully, and from this view, you look stunning. The way you're laid back on his pillow, tears pricking in your eyes, he thinks you look more angelic than anything he ever saw in heaven.
“fuuuck,” He groans, letting his head fall onto the bed as he starts to move his hips.
“Adam!” The way you whine his name is truly sinful, and he feels his dick twitch in response.
“holyfuck, ‘s so big,” The slight burn makes you regret your impatience now, and his face makes you regret stroking his ego. You make a point to ignore his self satisfied laugh, focusing instead on how his cock stretched you open, making you to tighten and release around him. You turn your head, looking at his wicked fucked-out smile that grew wider and wider as his movements got deeper.
You can’t speak, you just moan helplessly as your hands search for anything to grab onto to steady yourself. You throw your hands around his neck and bury them in his now dark wings, in the way you always did. You gripped the feathers tightly and let out a moan and oh, god, he’s not going to last long, he thinks, with you gripping the sensitive feathers like that. He groans again, then his lips find your shoulder, where he leaves messy, open-mouthed kisses trailing towards your neck.
“so fuckin’ sexy, so, so good for me,” you barley even register that he’s speaking, with your entire focus being on the way he moved in and out of you.
“you’re- so beautiful,” he says between grunts. your eyes widen.
“wha-ahh-“ before you can question that, a particularly hard thrust makes the words die in your throat, and you’re clawing to his biceps again.
A warmth of pride erupts in your chest at the way his breathing has turned labored and his grip on you tightens. An arm snakes around your waist, the other under your head, pulling you impossibly tighter against him as he continues to desperately pound into you. The proud smirk you wore is wiped off your face when you feel one hand releases you and his hand trails down, eventually pressing a thumb your clit, rubbing small circles that make you moan and twitch beneath him.
You can’t even warn him before your whole body erupts. You spill over, you lose sense of where and who you are, all the while, Adam pounds into you, strokes you inside and out. You vaguely hear a sudden crash and him mumbling, thanking god that you came before him because seconds later, he’s spilling his own cum inside you with a broken wanton groan.
Adam stills for a moment, panting as he holds you close. When he rolls off you, he keeps one arm around you, pulling you against his chest. Huh. That’s new.
Neither of you say anything. That was… different, than you’re used to with him. You furrow your brows as you think, and find yourself confused. The cogs in your head turning something terrible in your mind, questioning his intentions.
Once you’ve caught your breath, you sit up, pushing away his arm as you go to find your clothes. He frowns, watching you pick your shirt up from the ground and pull it over your head. You looked guarded, like a cornered doe, like you were just waiting for the chance to sprint away.
Adam grabs his own boxers from the floor and pulls them on, quickly crossing the room to where you were. He looks down at you, and feels an odd, tightening in his chest, something he’s felt a lot since falling to hell.
He leans against the door, putting on a cocky smile.
“Soo… this was like a booty call, huh?”
“…Yeah, whatever. See ya,”
#i am SO out of practice writing smut holy shit this is so bad#took me fucking forever too#but hey i’m sick so i have a lot of time to write!#also i promise the next one won’t end immediately after the smut like these last two 😭 i’ve got the plot more figured out now#adam x reader#first man adam x reader#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader#!my stuff#!not sfw#first man adam#hazbin hotel adam#female reader
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So I Spied Another Day...
You know it was a good show when you can’t decide whether your heart is so full from all the love and joy, or so empty because it's over.
Really do buckle up, because this is a long one.
So the show went a little like this. They played the Spies pro-shoot on a giant movie screen, but any time a song started, the audio changed to the instrumental track, the video typically faded to simple background graphics, and the cast came out to perform the number live in concert style. There were also a series of audience participation prompts up on the movie screen, such as standing to deliver a line in unison, giving Lauren a standing ovation for the Pay Attention! Reprise, enthusiastically booing Dr. Baron von Nazi and the still infuriatingly catchy Not So Bad (for anyone who’s curious, in addition to encouraging boos and yelled disagreements with von Nazi, they also cut the audience participation bit from the song).
The energy in the room was so electric and full of joy and warmth. People shouted out iconic lines, went wild for everyone’s entrances, and absolutely lost their damn minds over Curtwen at pretty much every opportunity. And the cast were clearly having just as much fun. Doing This has always been my favorite, and there was something so sweet about them singing it again all these years later. We finally got Joey performing Spies Are Forever (Evil Reprise) again and it was just as chilling and beautiful as you’d expect. And One Step Ahead was just on a whole new level. I don’t want to give anything away, but the details in that performance were INCREDIBLE.
It was simply so special seeing most of the original gang come back while also bringing some new friends along. Shout out to Mariah for coming out at the top of the show so ready to play, setting the tone for the whole evening. Shout out to James for putting his comedy chops on full display (LET JAMES BE FUNNY MORE) and dancing the hell out of One More Shot (another favorite number). And shoutout to Carlos Alazraqui (taking over the roles of Sergio and Vladimir Poopin) and Tommy Link for coming into this crazy part of our world with such enthusiasm and silliness. Brian deserves a medal for agreeing to once again play the most cringe-worthy character in all of Pulp-StarCanWrecked history, and for sounding so fucking good while doing it. Tessa was having a blast in full unhinged glory and I gladly worship at her altar. Lauren is maybe the funniest person alive and deserved her standing ovation, prompted or not. Seeing Joe Walker perform live has been Item Number One on my fandom bucket list since I moved to LA a couple of years ago, and I still can’t quite believe I managed it. I’d wondered if he’d be rusty, but honestly he sounded great; it was like no time had passed. Mary Kate still has one of my all-time favorite voices and her Tatiana remains forever engaging. Joey showed up dressed to slay as a gay evil genius Bond-movie supervillain and proceeded to thoroughly deliver on that promise. And Curt… every time I watch Spies I am increasingly blown away by what he does with this arrogant, broken mess of a character. He clearly loves Agent Mega as much as any of us, and to see a performance refined and powered by such clear and thoughtful passion is just a huge treat.
(And while he wasn’t in the cast, I can’t not mention Corey. Between his roles as director and co-writer, so much of what Spies is comes directly from him and we don’t appreciate that nearly enough. And shout out to Esther Fallick for her wonderful work as Susan and the Informant. She might not have been there in person, but her incredible performance was with us the whole time.)
I know this is preaching to the choir, but Spies Are Forever really is such a special show. It’s a story about recovery, and devastating as it can be, I think there’s also something deeply healing about it at its core. For one thing, I know it played a huge role in mending my relationship with my asexuality. I will forever be grateful to it for existing, to TCB, Talkfine, and the original cast for creating it, and to those same people for maintaining its legacy with the amount of love and care it deserves. It was a privilege to be in the room as so many people came to celebrate this miraculous little musical. There were a couple of minor tech glitches (I wonder if they’ll even include the “big one”—the projector jumping over most of the staircase scene before getting fixed—in the digital ticket version), but nothing that could even begin to damper the magic of the night.
We all know that spies never die (except for Owen and the Informant, oops). And at times like this concert, I think this special little show with its short run in 2016 will prove to be just as immortal.
#anyways I just had the best time#and it took a couple of days because I've been so busy but I had to write down how special it all really was#so grateful#spies are forever#spy another day#tin can bros#tcb#tinlightenment#agent curt mega#curt mega#owen carvour#tatiana slozhno#cynthia houston#the deadliest man alive#doctor baron von nazi#the informant#joey richter#lauren lopez#brian rosenthal#corey lubowich#mary kate wiles#mariah rose faith casillas#james tolbert#joe walker#tessa netting#tom lenk#Carlos Alazraqui
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lord its so dark in here the sahara desert of tsaritsa content you are like a shining oasis. your characterisation of her compels me & mihoyo would be hard pressed to top it imo.!! caaaaan i humbly request yr thoughts on her first meeting w a reader of any kind, or maybe even multiple kinds (sagau, sagau god au, isekai, etc) if you so desire...
it really is like a desert here. being the fan of a character we aren't getting until the last damn nation is driving me up a wall but i will persevere bc if nothing else i support morally bankrupt women in media. we r in a severe drought over here but i do my best. unfortunately nothing i say is ever coherent so pull out your translation notes its abt 2 be messy
also this got out of hand but thats bc first meetings w the tsaritsa are tricky to write + a LOT of her characterization lies in deeper exploration then just surface level yknow...NOT A DIG AT YOU this is just my excuse for rambling. gently pats the tsaritsa she can hold so much complexity i do not have the word count to delve into it completely :]
gonna talk cult au for a bit here though because that's 99% of my content. and honestly? she thrives in sub au's of the cult au like villain au + imposter au. it's basically made for her. i mean, early days, the imposter au had been going around for a little while but one of the first few ideas was the Fatui taking reader in so like. it kinda technically actually was. pretty sure cult au Tsaritsa popped up because of the imposter au. a lot of it's writers kinda left though which. man am i getting old or.
anyway.
there isn't much of a chance her first impression is all that positive. at best it's usually neutral, imo, but rarely if ever positive. specifically because i view the Tsaritsa as someone who isn't as fanatical as most of the acolytes typically are towards the creator. she's not exactly going to worship the ground you walk on unlike a certain geo lizard. which is partially why i think she thrives in the sub au's i mentioned.
imposter au, for example. she meets you at your lowest. there's no gaudy extravagance or pampering from the acolytes waiting for you because your own acolytes have turned on you. for all intents and purposes you aren't a "god" at all. which is why i don't think she meshes well with normal cult au reader. the Fatui are made up of outcasts, basically, and imposter au slots right in just perfectly. you're weak, at your lowest, when you meet the Fatui in the imposter au. and the Fatui can help you, too.
a mutual exchange, really. the Tsaritsa sees a tool she can use to one up the rest of the nations and especially Archons, and she has no qualms about you using her and the Fatui in turn. you both want something out of it, after all. whether you just want to be safe from the rest of the acolytes, or you want revenge, or whatever else..she'll give you the power to fulfill it, and she gains the strongest piece on the chessboard when all is said and done.
the best way i can describe the first meeting is "practical", i suppose. she sees an opportunity in you. the ultimate gamble. because if she "saves" you, and you dont trust anyone else because they tried to kill you, well..she holds all the cards, doesn't she?
but the Tsaritsa, imo, is just as capable of being just as fanatical towards you as anyone else. she just won't worship you as the creator. but as yourself? clawing your way back to your divine power and taking back what belongs to you? the Tsaritsa is, to me, a character who's character flourishes in long-term fics more because she changes a LOT between "just met reader" and after having been with reader for some time. she's practically apathetic at the beginning but a lot of her character, in my characterization, shines through LONG after the first meeting.
#asks#Anonymous#sagau#tsaritsa#like. am i explaining this coherently?? first meetings r GOOD and i could go on a tangent of like. first meetings w zl and make it work#but first meetings w the tsaritsa is like. you just cooked a 5 course meal. took one bite. called it a day.#so much of my characterization lies in the “after” of the first meeting#because her first meetings are generally the same. she's apathetic at best!! she does not gaf abt the creator in the SLIGHTEST#but show that you are more then the creator? that you do not cling to the title like a shield? that you do not rely on it?#youve got the worst person youve ever known ready to kill a man for you.#tsaritsa is very like. EXTREMELY hard to earn the trust of but when you do she will kill someone for you no hesitation no question#which is why she works SO WELL in villain au and imposter au!!!!!!!!!#esp if theres a fake “creator” calling you the imposter. she hates their ass and was .5 seconds from dethroning them anyway#you just made it 10x easier#also cant do just first meetings bc i am incapable of not shoving themes of love into every fic w her SORRY#tsaritsa going on a full multiple month long mental breakdown bc she is not in love with you but she would destroy everything for u..#(shes in denial)#tsaritsa and complex themes of love and what it means for the god of love to be incapable of feeling it + what it means when reader shows u#LIKE UGHHHHHH okay. i guess ill write another tsaritsa fic and put it in my vault#aka my drafts#i hold so many fics hostage there its crazy#this answered like 0 of ur questions sorry i see tsaritsa and black out and this happens#i just think first meetings dont let her character really come thru but my response got out of hand so uhhhhh everyone look away. please#putting tape over my mouth now so i shut up before this gets worse#basically tsaritsa gravitates more towards outcast reader rather then one who has already become accustomed to the adoration of the acolyte#does that make sense........#i havent slept in forever and im running on nothing but spite and dreams atp dont expect coherency when it comes 2 the tsaritsa from me#head in hands someone please stop me i keep rambling abt the tsaritsa it makes me go NUTS#lays down. explodes
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On Doomsdays and Devotion
After the Enterprise’s most recent brush with death, Jim notices that Spock is sticking closer to him than usual. The conversation that ensues is unexpectedly impactful. This is 2.5k of pre-Spirk feels, rated G. On AO3 here!
Jim was fairly certain that Spock had been following him.
It did not happen all the time. It did not disrupt either of their duties. In fact, it had taken him a few days to convince himself that he was not imagining it, especially since he was still distracted by dealing with the fallout of their most recent incident with a planet-killing weapon. Still, once he started paying attention, the fact remained: when Spock would normally have been off on his own doing science experiments or reports or whatever else Spock did when he was away from Jim, he was, instead, quietly by Jim’s side.
Spock sat next to Jim at meals. He accompanied him in the gym. He sat in the same room as Jim when they were doing reports. Even when they were not together, Spock often found reasons to pass Jim in the corridor, speak to him briefly, or grab something from whatever room Jim was in on his way from task to task.
Jim did not mind this. In fact, he probably should have been slightly worried about just how little Spock’s frequent presence bothered him, but he could not quite bring himself to analyze that part of his feelings too deeply. Suffice to say that he was not irritated by the shift in his first officer’s behavior. He was, however, slightly concerned.
At one point, he attempted to bring it up with the Vulcan in question.
“Mister Spock,” he said, smiling, “Is there something you would like to discuss with me?”
Spock blinked at him. If it were anyone else, Jim would almost have said he looks sheepish.
“No, captain.”
Jim bit back a sigh. He did not expect Spock to simply tell him whatever was going on, not after so many days of silence, but it still would have been nice.
“Very well,” said Jim, and the conversation was forgotten. Jim almost began to ignore the unusual occurrence entirely.
Then, one night, well over a standard week after the incident with their most recent planet-killer, Jim suddenly found that he could no longer hold himself together.
He was off duty, which was fortunate, but that was just about the only thing that felt fortunate about the situation. The events of their most recent adventure — the death of his friend, the possibility and reality of such destruction, how close he had come to his own death — had finally caught up to him, and all he could do was hightail it to his quarters and hope he made it before his crew has to witness their captain having a minor meltdown. He ended up hiding in his room for a good portion of the evening, a few hours which he would rather not talk about, before eventually deciding he had pulled himself together enough to justify going out in search of some food.
After everything, it really should not have been a surprise that Spock was there when he emerged.
His first officer was attempting to look nonchalant, but given that there was very little reason for his presence in this corridor at this time and it was highly unlikely that he simply happened to be here at the moment Jim left his room, Jim thought he was doing a rather poor job of it. He looked distinctly unsurprised by Jim’s presence.
“Mister Spock,” he said, trying to act casual and not as though he had spent the last few hours working through a series of extremely strong emotions. “Is something wrong?”
Spock looked at Jim consideringly for a moment. Jim resisted the urge to fidget under his gaze.
“The ship is in standard working order, captain,” Spock said.
“That isn’t a no.”
“Correct. You are experiencing emotional distress.”
Jim winced a little. “That obvious, huh?”
“To an average member of the crew, likely not. I, however, can make out eleven separate physiological and psychological signs that—”
Jim raised a hand to cut him off. “Very well, Mister Spock, I understand. You’re right.” He quirked a small smile. “Even the great Captain Kirk can’t see his friend die without experiencing any unpleasantness, I’m afraid.”
“You also came close to death, captain.”
Jim blinked. “Yes, that too, I suppose.”
Spock’s lips thinned almost imperceptibly, but he said nothing. For a moment, they stood there in rather awkward silence.
“Well,” said Jim eventually, “I was going to get some food. Would you like to accompany me?”
“I would find that acceptable, captain.”
Spock fell easily into step beside him as they made their way towards the mess hall. They were silent as Jim got some food and sat down with his plate. Spock sat across from him, though he had not taken any food from the replicators. The room was empty due to the late hour and the lights were dimmed. In the silence, Spock’s presence seemed to have more significance than really made sense.
Jim ate in silence for several long moments. Spock considered him from across the table. Eventually, to Jim’s surprise, it was Spock who broke the silence.
“Would you like to speak about the subject of your distress?” asked Spock.
Jim paused. His instinct was to refuse, to focus on the mission instead of his distraction and only talk about it later, perhaps in his logs or on shore leave with Bones and copious amounts of alcohol. He usually did his best to keep Spock from having to deal with any more of his human emotions than is necessary. But Spock was asking, now, and though the Vulcan would deny it if he ever dared to make the claim, Jim could tell that he was worried. He could not bring himself to refuse his friend’s offer.
“It… troubles me, when I can’t save someone.”
Spock’s brows furrowed. “You were not on the ship at the time of Decker’s departure. It was not your responsibility to save him, nor was it possible for you to do so.”
Jim managed a small, sad smile. “I know. That doesn’t mean it’s easy to remember.”
Spock inclined his head in acknowledgement, and they returned to the silence in which the meal had begun. Jim finished his food, pushed his plate aside, and looked at Spock consideringly. Spock returned his gaze, even and unflinching.
“There’s something on your mind, Mr Spock. Care to share?”
Spock considered him for a moment. When he spoke, it was with deliberation.
“It concerns me, captain, that you give such little importance to your own near demise.”
Jim blinked.
“I had no desire to die,” he said.
“And yet you came perilously close to doing so.”
“It was the best way to save the ship.”
“Perhaps, sir, but you must take into account the way your death would have affected the ship and its crew. Productivity would have decreased at a significant rate and the emotional fallout would have affected many of the crew for at least several years.”
Jim frowned. “A grieving crew is better than a dead crew. I wouldn’t be much of a captain if I couldn’t value my ship above myself.”
“You may be correct, captain. However, I would still strongly advise you to utilize more caution in the future.”
Jim’s brows furrowed. “Where is this coming from, Spock? This isn’t the first time I’ve almost died.”
Spock hesitated. Jim noticed, for the first time, a shadow of vulnerability hidden bleeding through the edges of Spock’s mask of Vulcan control. He felt his expression soften.
“Spock,” he said gently, “Why have you been following me?”
Spock looked down at his hands where they were calmly clasped together, resting on the table. “It is illogical, captain.”
“You? Illogical? Somehow I doubt that.”
“Even the best of us have our flaws.”
Despite the strange tension in the air between them, Jim could not help but chuckle at that.
“Very true.” Then, when a moment of silence went by without Spock responding, he prompted, “Well?”
Still looking at his hands, Spock paused for a moment before speaking. “I admit that I would have found it most disagreeable if you had lost your life in that mission.”
“I wouldn’t have exactly been pleased with it either.”
Spock continued as though Jim had not spoken. “Were you to perish, the ship would feel your absence most keenly.”
Jim considered him for a long moment before, throwing caution to the winds, he spoke. “And you? Would you feel it?”
For the first time in several moments, Spock finally looked up and met Jim’s eyes. “I admit that I would, captain.”
Jim swallowed. If Spock were human, Jim would have reached across the table to take his hand, but as it was, he contented himself with holding his earnest gaze.
“I’m sorry I concerned you.”
“Thank you,” said Spock. “Though I admit that I appreciate it more if you refrained from doing so again in the future.”
“You know I can’t promise that, Spock.”
Spock’s brow furrowed slightly. “I am aware, captain. However, that does not mean I am pleased by this fact.”
Jim smiled a little, gentle and a bit sad. “I thought Vulcans were not capable of displeasure.”
Spock looked Jim in the eye, tilting his head slightly. “When it comes to you, I find a great many capable of a great many things.”
Jim opened his mouth. He closed it again.
“I see,” he said, rather lamely.
Spock frowned. “Captain, I do not think you realize the importance of this matter.”
“It’s my life. I’d say I have a pretty good sense of how important it is.”
“And yet you are acting as though you do not realize how significant it is to those around you.”
“A captain’s life is lived in service of his ship and his crew”
“The importance of your existence is not found solely in your captaincy, Jim.”
Jim gave Spock a long, considering look. “Are you trying to tell me something, Spock?”
“It is also found, among other things, in your status as a friend.”
Jim was silent, digesting this. Spock looked at him for a long moment, then, unprompted but with uncharacteristically visible hesitance, spoke again.
“I have been maintaining a proximity to you that is closer than average for the last eight point three days because, unreasonable and improper as it may be, I have found your presence an illogically reassuring reminder that you did not, in fact, perish during our last mission.”
“Oh,” said Jim softly.
This time, he was unable to keep himself from reaching out to place a hand on Spock’s sleeve, just above the wrist. Spock looked down at the place where their skin didn’t quite touch, seeming to consider it, but did not protest the contact. Jim took this as permission to leave his hand where it is.
“I’m sorry to have caused you pain,” he said. It was a testament to the weight of the conversation that Spock only frowned slightly at this, not bothering to protest the implications of emotion in Jim’s statement. “I’m safe now. I promise I had no intention of letting the universe get rid of me this easily.”
Jim paused for a moment, thinking, then forged ahead with all the boldness of the man who had recently faced death without flinching.
“You know I had to do it, though,” he said.
Spock’s frown deepened slightly. “The machine’s destruction was logically necessary for the sake of the galaxy. However, the specific method chosen was perhaps not—”
Jim held up a hand to stop him. “I’m aware of your thoughts on my methods. I’m talking about my motivation.”
Spock’s frown grew less displeased and more considering. “In that case, please elaborate.”
Jim couldn’t help a small, fond smile at Spock’s words. “I knew it had to be destroyed for the sake of the galaxy, but that wasn’t really what I was thinking about when I did it.” His smile faded into seriousness as he spoke. He maintained eye contact with Spock. “I was thinking about my crew. About how my friends— my family would be destroyed if I did not act.” He gently squeezed Spock’s forearm where his hand still rested on his sleeve. “I was thinking about you.”
Spock was silent. Jim studied his face, trying to parse the emotions he could almost feel hiding behind Spock’s Vulcan control. There was surprise, he thought, and perhaps confusion, but also something deeper, perhaps more vulnerable or more tender. He could not make it out.
Jim found that he could not let this conversation stagnate in silence, not without knowing for certain that Spock understood him.
“So,” he said, “I hope you realize that this feeling goes both ways.”
Spock’s brows furrowed just slightly. “Clarify.”
“I… value your presence. Very highly. I, um,” Jim paused, took a deep breath, then forged on quickly. “I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you.” He swallowed. “Please don’t make me find out.”
Spock paused. He considered Jim for a long moment. For some reason, Jim grew increasingly nervous under his scrutiny.
“I am gratified to know that you understand the sentiment,” Spock said eventually. “I will endeavor to act in the interest of self-preservation.”
Jim relaxed a little, letting a smile slip onto his face. “That’s all I can ask for. Thank you.”
“And you will endeavor to do the same?”
Jim lifted his hand from Spock’s arm and held it out to shake. “It’s a deal.”
Too late, he remembered the vast differences between the cultural norms of humans and Vulcans when it came to touch and fingers in particular. He made to withdraw his hand, slightly sheepish.
Before he could move and without breaking eye contact, Spock reached forward and took his hand.
Jim felt a spark of warmth, almost a tingling sensation, travel up his arm and down his spine at the touch. Spock’s hand was dry and very warm. His gaze was serious, earnest in a way Jim rarely saw from him. Jim found that he could not look away.
“A deal,” Spock repeated, his voice soft and low. Jim found himself fighting back a shiver.
Before Jim could pull himself together and return to his senses long enough to speak, Spock released his hand and stood. Jim looked up at him, blinking dumbly, as Spock nodded at him.
“This conversation has been most profitable, captain. Thank you for your time.”
“It— uh, it was my pleasure.” Jim winced internally, abruptly glad the room was empty but for the two of them. He doubted his suave reputation would survive intact otherwise.
Jim could have sworn he saw Spock smirk at him as he turned to go. He found himself smiling softly in return as he watched Spock leave.
When Jim returned to his quarters, he found that he felt much better than he had when he left them last. The emotional toll of the mission was not completely lifted, of course, but the reminder that he had his first officer at his side made it feel easier to bear. The thought of Spock’s concern for his well-being made him made him feel oddly warm.
And, if it was the memory of Spock’s hand on his — of the warmth of his touch, the thinly veiled feeling in his eyes, the emotions that sparked in Jim’s own chest at the contact, and the promise of, maybe, someday, something more — that eventually lulled him to sleep with a smile on his face, that was no one’s business but his own.
#star trek tos#spirk#kirk x spock#james t kirk#spock#star trek#wren writes#*waves shyly* hello star trek fandom!#this took FOREVER because writing has been really slow lately but i finally came up with a title i'm happy with so here you go :D#there should be more fic for both witcher and star trek on its way soon! <3#also first fic of 2024 let's go!!!!#man it's been ages since i posted a new fic that wasn't a collaboration
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(Submitted by @ro--lal)
#homestuck#out of context quotes#homestuck out of context#hs#submission#jade harley#karkat vantas#suggestive#Man. This writing is. Something.#Anywho sorry this took forever to post a bunch of life stuff got in the way
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@moonshynecybin I was about to send you an ask but then it got long and tumblr was all about characters limit and whatever, so, making this a text post.
I was having thoughts about the insanity that must be going on inside of Marc's brain in the forced to come out AU and then I saw your "last Rosquez sex pre-Sepang" ask and it gave me even more thoughts.
In my head, Marc is unable to have meaningless or hate sex meanwhile Valentino can go for it easily (or so he thinks until our protagonist meets Marc, anyway) so obviously, Valentino is the one who guides them into sleeping together again in 2016 (can't decide if it's as early as the tests or if maybe Barcelona makes his last reserve break or something but— details). And if he promised himself in October of 2015, that this was the last time he was having sex with Marc, but then he lets them be together again and that leads them to being caught? Well, I am not an expert in Valentino & guilt but that sure is something interesting to consider.
Do I believe that Valentino is agreeing to the fake dating plan out of guilt? Maybe just a tiny bit. For the most part it's because he cares about Marc and can't stand to see him go through this alone/in the worst way possible (not that he can recognize that at the beginning, of course, but you know).
I loved that you mentioned the idea of Yamaha telling Valentino he could deal with this alone/didn't have to go with the plan with Marc (and it would of course be easier for him). There is a part of me that wants to push things and say the photos identify Marc very clearly but like, there could be ~reasonable doubts about Vale (not to take things too far and make him too much of a "hero" here but, that's an option, I guess).
Anyway, back to what this was originally supposed to be about : Marc's brain. All considerings, things went like this :
the man he idolized all his life became his friend and then they started having sex and Marc thought they at least were friends and understood each other in the fields that mattered to him
same man betrayed him in front of the whole world and basically called him a dangerous rider that he doesn't want to share tracks with him [and obviously this leads to all the backlash Marc had to go through but I think what stung the most, at the end of the day, was the realization that Valentino thought of him like that]
at the end of the day, I don't think Marc is one to hold grudges [or I am projecting my own self here, my bad] and if Valentino comes up to him and wants him in some kind of way? of course Marc is going to take what he can have, even if he quickly realizes Valentino is not open to the two of them talking
Valentino agreeing to the two of them fake dating? it makes absolutely zero sense, there is a part of Marc that sees this as a sign of hope and it's bad because the last time Marc hoped they had a good thing going on, Valentino destroyed him in public without any kind of warning
"Risk Management is new to the Marc Marquez system" is a quote that I absolutely adore and that he let out into the world in 2023 but I can see home boy showing some kind of self-preservation in this scenario [and Marc initially struggling to be close to Vale (like you showed so well in your short post) is part Marc not being a good actor/feeling uncomfortable demonstrating PDA in public and part Marc trying to protect himself from his own feelings for Vale] [is Marc aware of the extent of his feelings? of course not, but still]
also, like, let's be real, this is the whole fantasy Marc never really allowed himself to think about and to "live" it in those conditions? yeah, not exactly easy on the heart and brain
I have no idea where I was going with all that but in any case, I know they have a fight one day where Valentino is like "Marc, you need to put in more efforts" and "I'm doing this for you" [he didn't mean for those words to come out but oops] and that has Marc calling him out on his hypocrisy.
On a very unrelated note, I'm very curious about when they have sex again in this AU (or even when they kiss, will have to think about that).
#rpf#4693#writing stuff#this took forever to write and I'm not even sure it makes sense I'm sorry#forced coming out au#would love to write that scene but no idea how vale would defend himself because as I said I have no idea how this man's brain works
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Kanda blurb. As promised. 18+.
This might not be good idk I've never written smut before
Kanda is bad with words. He's never been great at using them to communicate, even though he knows what he wants to say. So, instead of telling you he missed you while he was away, he simply drags you away when he sees you, out of everyone’s sight except his own, to the cool quiet of his room.
He definitely prefers fingering you to eating you out. Not that the latter is bad—your thighs drive him mad—but something about being able to look you in the eye while he does it, watching you bite your lip and blush and whimper as he pushes his fingers deeper into your cunt, that's infinitely more satisfying to him. Maybe it's because he doesn't feel as skilled with his tongue as he does with his fingers, and he's a proud man. Or maybe it's the fact that he can use his free hand to play with your tits while he gets you off, or the way you fuck yourself on his long, deft fingers so eagerly.
But probably, he thinks, it's the way you grab at his shirt and pull him down to you until your foreheads touch, your face hot, breath mingling with his. The way he speeds up his fingers and you bend your head back invitingly, a quiet moan—his favorite kind—leaving your throat as his lips ghost over the skin on your shoulder. You babble between moans about how good he makes you feel, how nobody else could ever take his place, which, of course, you know strokes his ego in a way that works to your advantage. When you come on his fingers, you whine that you love him before pulling him in again, locking your lips with his as your body heaves.
Yeah, he thinks. This is way better than talking.
#dgm#d gray man#dgm x reader#d gray man x reader#Kanda yu#kanda yu x reader#🌷.writing#This took me forever to write and then like 30 seconds to read through. F#I don't like it much but there's a real shortage of kanda content so here u go#Maybe I'll get better at writing smut idk
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Part I – Part II ... Part XVI – Part XVII
The consequences of the Affair of the Pevensie Brothers and the Well extend beyond said Pevensie brothers in ways that surprise Edmund greatly, when his week-long prison sentence is up, and Matron releases him from the San at last.
The hacking cough lingers, and the ankle will keep him from walking or riding comfortably for another week at least, but his energy returns rapidly, and when she catches him trying to slip out to classes one morning, she resigns herself.
Peter looks for him between every lesson, speaks to him before and after every meal, wanders into the Second Form common room at odd moments in the evenings, but Edmund understands, he knows that protection is Peter's prerogative, and that Edmund, well, to Peter, his little brother's life is beyond price.
He takes to showing up in the Sixth Form common room some nights, just to save Peter the trouble. That's one place he first notices the changes.
They never throw Ed out, not even Witherspoon, head of the high-and-mighty Sixth. The first few times Ed follows Peter in, he sees a few mouths open, a few frowns start, but then they pause, shrug, or someone else's hand or word stays them.
He puts it together the fourth night. The way their eyes slide from him to Peter, and there they hesitate, their indignation fades, and Ed almost laughs because he knows that look.
Respect. They look at Peter with respect, deference, and Ed is grinning with the double-sight it gives him.
High King Peter, he thinks, and a swell of affection chokes him when he sees how Peter only half-notices the reactions, when he watches Peter smile and joke like the others, until his opinion is asked and it is given in a lordly fashion, which would come across as stuffy from anyone else, but only sounds firm and decisive from Peter.
Edmund isn't surprised by his own suddenly vaulted status among his peers; he did after all Nearly Die, or so the story goes. In truth, he probably would have had until midnight before he was beyond help; as cold as the wretched place had been, there was no wind, he'd been mostly dry, and even with the bad ankle, he'd done his best to keep the blood flowing. He also hadn't given up hope, he'd told himself over and over that Peter would come, Peter would come and find him.
And Peter had.
Seemingly creating his own legend in the process.
Ed pieces the story together slowly, between make-up classes and extra tutoring, amusing himself in the process.
Peter's version is quick and to the point, and says far more about Edmund than himself.
Colin tells of a Peter who strode down the hallway, with people scattering before him, Finley and Harris and Biggers scuttling in front like sulky sheep, and Head Boy Wollers at his side. “He made Wollers look small,” Colin says.
Ed’s fellow second formers whisper of Pevensie's solemnity, before the wild rush that followed his exclamation of the culprit’s name.
Two weeks after, a fight breaks out on the way in to breakfast, not just pushing and shoving either, but snarling and punching and hot-blooded blows spilling onto the dining hall floor.
Ed turns to look back, catches sight of Peter coming in, and suddenly, somehow, Peter’s there before the masters, catching upraised fist, stilling wild boys into open upturned faces. Edmund comes to Peter's side as he sets both Third Formers on their feet.
“What are you doing, spoiling your breakfast like this?” Peter's all sharp sword sheathed, firm on the edge of fatherly. “Not to mention the rest of ours. Go sit down, and don't speak to each other until you're done, unless it's to apologise.”
Edmund bites back a smile at the abashed faces, the meek murmurs of assent.
Peter does not glance round at the staring eyes as he walks to his table, only nodding to the masters, who nod relief back.
The Third Formers, Ed discovers then, hold Peter in utter awe, and he gathers that part of the tale in passing snatches of words, in strategic positioning at the library.
Peter, barging into the common room that night like a whirlwind, picking up Finley by his shirtfront as if he were a rag doll, his anger filling the room.
He hadn't shouted once, one of the boys says, just sort of snapped, and Finley fessed up in a heartbeat.
Don't touch Edmund Pevensie, someone mutters, or you’ll be facing his brother.
It gives Ed mixed feelings, knowing Peter's show of anger had been more like fear, fear for Ed and whatever had been done to him. Peter's passionate, energetic, but he's kind too, and only fear truly makes him show his teeth, nothing hits closer to Peter's great heart than danger to his family.
Ed witnessed that dozens of times in Narnia, watched Peter master the art of wielding both sword and open hand, and he knows Peter is relearning it here, though it is harder in many ways, he thinks.
He’s seen Peter roused, he can imagine the shock Finley must have had, the impact of Peter forcing him to come out in the snow, to see what fate had befallen Ed as a result of the older boy’s cruelty, and he hopes, prays that shock can be a catalyst.
He remembers a flash of blue, a stone fox, the sting of hot tears, and the deep sudden surge of pity and horror.
That was the crux of it for him, Edmund knows: feeling sorrow on behalf of someone else, instead of just yourself. That was the beginning of his change.
Could Finley have felt the same, shivering in the snow, staring down at Peter cradling Ed in his arms and repeating his name through tears?
He hopes, he certainly hopes.
When he writes to Finley and Harris and Biggers, he chooses his words carefully but kindly, as if he were calling out Peter for some lapse in judgement. Certainly here, Ed knows he has no place for superiority.
He’s pleased, even moved, when Peter pushes a well-folded paper into Ed’s hand, asks him to put it in the envelope for Finley, asks him not to read it.
Edmund resists the temptation, but he thinks he already knows what it says; even here at this crowded boy’s school, Peter is still the noblest man he has ever met.
No letters ever come in response, but Ed knows he has done what he can, and makes his peace with it.
On his return to the stables, Master Gringham calls, “Mighty glad to see you, Ed-boy!” but his pat on the back is careful, and Ed hacks into his fist with a grin.
“Thank you, sir.”
But when Peter's in the riding ring helping three first formers through their second riding lesson, Gringham comes to stand by Edmund leaning on the fence.
They watch Peter for several moments in silence, before Gringham breaks it abruptly.
“He's nearly lost you before, hasn't he?”
A flash of green eyes, the gleam of light on steel, the shaft of an arrow…
Edmund exhales. “Yes.”
“He would die for you, he loves you so.”
“Yes.”
“His face.” Slower now. “It was… terrible. But beautiful. Like I imagine a lion might look.”
Edmund turns his head to hide his smile. “I can imagine.”
“Glad you're alright. For his sake. And mine too, I suppose.” A gleam of a grin breaks through.
Edmund grins back, sobers. “Well, thank you for being there for him. You… remind him of someone.”
“Someone, eh?” A sharp look from under grey eyebrows, but Ed just nods, steady.
Gringham shrugs. “He's a boy I'd be proud of,” he says, stepping back from the fence. “And the same for you.” Another quick pat on Edmund’s shoulder, who nods his thanks, before the stablemaster walks off.
Peter is adjusting one boy’s posture, and Ed smiles, hunches his shoulders further under his coat. His coughs make white clouds of warm breath.
Next
#man the last little conversation actually took forever#peter pevensie#edmund pevensie#pevensie brothers#narnia fanfiction#my writing#narnia
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Well, well, well... Here we are again.
This chapter is massive, folks. Nearly 30k words in total. Take your time chipping your way through it. *fingerguns*
#call of the abyss#man#MAN!!!#this chapter took FOREVER to write#for reference#nearly half of it was already written when i published chapter 7 a few months ago#ANYWHOO#very dense chapter - lots of stuff in there#i COULD have cut it but...#y'all would've eaten me alive if i had#you'll see ;)#so it's a double feature for y'all
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Orufrey modern!AU
Qifrey is a homeschool teacher for foster children who still don't have a foster family and for children that for various reasons can't go to public or private schools.
He is currently the teacher of four girls.
Two of them, Coco and Tetia, are foster children with a traumatic background and no family to take care of them, so they spend a lot of time at Qifrey's house.
The other two, Agott and Richeh, are the daughters (step-sisters with different mothers) of Qifrey's old best friend Olruggio, who has the full custody of both of them.
Olruggio is an artist/artisan, always too busy working on new projects and travelling around to meet clients, so he can't properly take care of his daughters alone. Also, he doesn't make a lot of money to send them to school, so Qifrey does him a favour by homeschooling them both.
Everything changes when Olruggio accidentally causes a fire while working and his whole studio (and part of his house too) is completely destroyed. He loses all his old projects, which means he also loses clients and money.
Qifrey wants to help him and he suggests for him and his daughters to go live with him until their house is rebuilt. Here, their lives will change forever. Olruggio and his daughters have the opportunity to grow closer. The four girls become friends, almost sisters, supporting each others during difficulties. And above all, Olruggio and Qifrey start to have feelings for each other, while unconsciously creating a peaceful and loving environment for all the girls, until they eventually fall in love and create a new family.
#idk how i came up with this- it took me forever to write it#witch hat atelier#wha#tongari boushi no atelier#witch hat atelier fanfiction#witch hat atelier headcanons#orufrey#olruggio#qifrey#agott#coco#tetia#richeh#Adding informations: Coco is the new entry and she became a foster child after accidentally killing her mother (lol)#No one wants to foster her because of her past but Qifrey steps in to help her#Agott is Olruggio's first daughter- her mother left them when she was still a baby to pursue a career in another country#Richeh is Olruggio's second daughter- her mother died for a disease#Her mother had another child *Riliphin- who's already in college* from a previous marriage with another man#Richeh and Riliphin are very close but she hates his abusive father and she hopes he's gonna stay with Qifrey and Olruggio after college#i want to write a fanfiction about this but i'm also too lazy#raga io
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I can't help it... I'm obsessed with him...
A little "history lesson" (for the ones interested) about how I became a fan of Type O Negative... and my feelings towards them...
When I heard 'my girlfriend's girlfriend ' for the first time in 1996 I was just a teen. Watching MTV in my bedroom. I was, at that time, very much into 60s music and aesthetic. A hippie après la lettre, sort of speak... I was also, for as long as I remember, obsessed with vampires and a huge fan of Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles.
So when this video came on I loved the colorful backdrop and sixties influences. And then there were 4 guys dressed in black, looking like vampires. Especially the singer. I lost it. This was my new favorite band. 🤗
When 'Love you to death' came out I ordered the T-shirt (a girl t-shirt, not the unisex shirts they sell now) via postorder catalogue Large. I loved that T-shirt and would still have it, if my mom didn't throw it out with all my other band shirts, because she thinks you need to keep the economy going by buying new stuff all the time and getting rid of "old" stuff. Insert *dramatic eyeroll*
Type O Negative were not a mainstream band and unfortunately, growing up in a small town, I was about the only one, as far as I know, that liked their music.
So, I completely missed out on their 1999 world coming down release. ☹️
In the early 2000s, a record store in the city where I went to college had a clearance sale. I found the least worst of CD and bought it. Around that same time I bought the After Dark DVD. It was only then that I found out about world coming down. I liked the "new" songs, but also had mixed feelings about them. They depicted an unhealthy lifestyle.
In 2003 'I don't wanna be me' was playing on MTV and I was excited to hear more new music from them and seeing them on MTV again. I remember also being shocked with Peter's appearance in that video. He did not look well... It would become clear he wasn't doing well at all: mental and physical health problems, addiction, jail time, forced rehab, relationship problems, etc...
Later that year Type O Negative came to a festival a few hours driving from where I lived... Unfortunately I had noone to go with and my boyfriend and I were volunteering for a local 'save the forest' non profit that same weekend. I thought I would see them next time, but the same circumstances made me not see them in 2007... 😥
And although Peter looked better (healthier) in the late 2000s, he aged a lot due to his addictions and lifestyle, he also looked kind of sad when he was performing on Wacken in 2007.
When he died in 2010 I initially had peace with it, thinking it was probably for the best.... knowing about his struggles and losses...
I did not know about the circumstances of his death until many years later and since then I've felt it could have been prevented. He did not OD, he did not commit suicide... he was clean for almost a year (!), he looked happy in his last interview 🥹... he died because he didn't receive the correct medical care on time... because he was taking care of his sick cat instead of himself, because the people nearby him didn't help (Did they not see/know how severely ill he was? I guess we'll never know)...
I've always felt like I missed out on something with not seeing Type O Negative live. From all the bands I've listened to as a teen until now, they're the only band that I love more with each time I listen to them. I don't have this kind of connection with other bands/artists... Seeing pictures, videos, ... of them makes me very nostalgic... it feels like they're still around. And then it hits me they're not 😥 I just miss this band a lot and wish we had more years with them, more music...
So... seeing old pictures of them, especially Peter in his more happier and healthier years (everything before world coming down era and even before 1997), makes me feel nostalgic ... "obsessed" ... and the pictures where he smiles are solid gold. 💚
I wonder... did he ever know how truly special he was ? Handsome, intelligent, goofy, creative, sensitive... I guess he didn't and let his value be determined by others. At least, that's how I interpret some of his lyrics... What do you think about this?
So, what's your story? Why do you love their music? I would love to find out!
This last picture is my absolute favorite 💚
#peter steele#peter ratajczyk#Peter's smiles 🥰#smile#green man#type o negative#looking for more type o negative mutuals#💚#about me#why I'm obsessed#it took me a long time to write this post#been thinking about how to put it in words...#searching for the right words and some pictures#💚💚💚#rip baby#gone too soon#gone but not forgotten#forever in my heart#personal#peter steele story#steeleheads#metal#gothic metal#90s#2000s#october rust#bloody kisses#goth#gothic#love you to death
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wait omg i’m curious about your unpopular thoughts about temenos writing wise.. i love when people discuss octopath writing it’s really enriching to see what we all have to say about certain story elements. plus you’re like a temenos representative to me. your thoughts about temenos make me go “so true!”
Aw, thank you! It took a while for me to decide on what to write here, since honestly I could go on for… frankly any aspect of this guy, especially in regards to treatment in fanon. But for now, I'll focus on my thoughts regarding how people treat tragedy in Temenos' story— namely, Crick's death— and why I personally dislike it as a writing decision and why I disagree with the idea that it is necessary.
Note: Goes without saying, but this is my personal opinion. If you believe otherwise, then that's all good. I'm not writing this to say that any one person is wrong, just to talk about an issue I have with the game's writing itself.
To start, I'll say that my main reason for disliking Crick's death in SH route is a matter of practicality. Killing him off causes Temenos to lose the main person that he had a fantastic relationship and banter with, and in my opinion, Temenos works best when he's bouncing off another person; not unlike most under the Sherlock-archetype.
Also, genuinely? It works wonders to keep Crick alive, if just because it provides a fantastic avenue to explore Temenos' institutional trauma. Having a character that's lived a different experience but within the same harmful institution opens up ways to explore the scope of its harm. And yes, this is for Crick specifically; not Ort, not the travelers, but Crick.
I think it really adds something that Temenos was raised by the church while Crick converted as a teenager during a really difficult time in his life. These two are good for each other. Crick sure as hell makes it a lot easier to write Temenos in fic.
(If you have a different experience, again, that's cool. I'm glad for you. I, however, will never fail to take the easy way out.)
(This is a lie, I'm over here making up fantasy church law for fic stuff but that's not related to this answer.)
I won't pretend that disliking Crick's death is an unpopular opinion. I mean, "Stormhail Fix-it" is an entire genre of fic on the OT2 Ao3 tag. What I do feel tends to go unaddressed though, is the fact that the idea that Crick's death is canon, therefore it is necessary, therefore it is the best decision; an idea that I wholeheartedly disagree with.
Within the text itself, Crick is killed off in order to give Temenos a personal reason to pursue Kaldena, thus putting him at odds with Kaldena's motivations being driven by her ideology and worldview that, "because humans committed the massacre, it was the gods' mistake to put us here". I also won't pretend that Kaldena's writing here isn't fucking awful, because Crick's death is also a device to make the player want Kaldena defeated even though she is just as much as a victim of the church; and that's to say nothing of her portrayal as an indigenous and dark-skinned woman.
These decisions are ones I disagree with. Killing Crick off was unnecessary to give Temenos reason to pursue the culprit, because Temenos already had someone close to him killed; and that's Pontiff Jörg. He raised Temenos from infancy, but due to the lack of focus on him outside of banter conversations, it's never relevant to his motivations outside of the desire for truth because a crime was committed.
We also didn't need to kill Crick off to show that the church was a terrible institution, because Roi already went missing in action. The Sacred Guard is the main body of law within Eastern Solistia, it's not unreasonable to think that the reason why Temenos dislikes them is because they clearly didn't do shit to investigate his disappearance.
However, one thing I really don't agree with is the idea that Crick's death is necessary because Temenos' story is a tragedy. And if you asked me why, I'd ask this in turn: why is death the only form of tragedy? Furthermore, why must a tragedy contain only tragic events? That in mind, what gives anything value in a tragedy, then?
Pretend we cannot completely rewrite Temenos' story. Even then, changing Crick's death to a permanent injury, a coma, or whatever is still a tragic event; and that's nothing to say of living with the consequences. Isn't losing your faith a tragedy? Isn't losing something you worked for years to do a tragedy?
Similarly, I'd still argue that it's more valuable to make Stormhail a near-death experience because not only does it show Temenos succeeding in making someone question the church but also the terror that is feeling like you're doomed to repeat tragedy. Even if you really aren't, it's hard to dismiss that feeling; especially when it has to do with being victimized by institutions.
And before someone says, "but bad things happen to good people in real life", I'm not treating these characters as living, breathing people who are subject to things like gravity, hunger, and exhaustion. I'm treating them as choices, and choices made that I disagree with.
It's why I make different choices. I choose to make Crick have to deal with chronic pain onwards. I choose to make Temenos realize change is still possible. I choose to let them both leave Stormhail alive. Are these better choices? I don't know. But I'll never stop questioning the ones made by the writers regardless; much less stop disagreeing with them.
So, in summary: I dislike Crick's death. I dislike Temenos having to spend the rest of the story without someone he can talk to so easily because Crick's absence weakens a lot of his scenes in Temenos 4. But more than that, I dislike the idea that tragedy is necessary on top of the idea that it is superior. Tragedy's good, I adore the genre; but written in mindful doses and all that.
#ty sm for the ask!! i'm sorry it took so long to get to but i really wanted to like. get my thoughts sorted since there's sm i'd talk abt#i had fun writing this out. it also really helped to get my feelings on SH down on paper bc *man* i got thoughts on the last half of#temenos' story. along w/ how it does hurt his writing that it's not even fully resolved till endgame#um. again if anyone disagrees then cool. but this is just my thoughts on the matter and all that#also i did get kinda... harsh towards the game near the end but it goes w/o saying i say all that bc i love the game sm#i absolutely would not dedicate this much energy to smth i didn't care about and i'm glad for the opportunity to talk abt it haha#bestomato#telegram#8path tag#octopath 2 spoilers#also i def have more to say abt dena but again we'd be here Forever if i did. head full of thoughts on temenos' story OTL
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"I'm going to tell you a story. Maybe it will sound familiar." Visionary x Insatiable x Status Asthmaticus x The Wolves of War
#this is really a show about coming of age in a vicious and unfamiliar world more than a show about werewolves#think about it. scott is sixteen and to him losing his first love is as incomprehensible and unfathomable as the supernatural.#and we're constantly reminded of how being sixteen and in love goes -- 'you're not in love you're sixteen and a child' etc.#these three characters make for such a good parallel to one another in how they werewolf + seeking guidance#especially + sudden change of worldview/stakes when confronted with sudden and unexpected loss and grieving#of course derek loses paige and becomes cold and jaded (see: literally becomes cold w/ blue eyes)#scott loses allison and commits harder to saving all of his friends even though one of them (or someone possessing him) killed her#liam is stopped from killing because of hayden's death#here are three werewolves who were sixteen and held their first love's dead body in their arms#and each of them took a different path. do you close yourself off? refuse to? do you change completely because of it?#and ofc it's teen wolf so everything always comes in threes#I have a lot of issues with the writing but the use of death (barring 6b) is not one of them. they really went hard on meaningful death.#also consider: lori holding brett's hand so he doesn't die alone and theo responding to tracy kissing him by killing her as she does#teen wolf writers went is anyone going to bastardize the original narrative to ponder new ideas about it and didn't wait for an answer#also women's deaths are always about love/for a man (thanks hollywood) but goddamn if they don't kill their women wisely#and the thing is they are all running. they're running from death and what does it get them? it gets them here.#derek wants to turn paige so she'll live forever. scott wants allison to live happily even with someone else. liam wants to save hayden.#none of them consider that cheating death will catch up to them until they run right into its arms#and all three die because of getting involved with the supernatural. all of them would presumably not have died otherwise.#coming of age into a world that takes and hurts and destroys and where you are now old enough for people around you to die.#this is not a show about werewolves.#teen wolf#twedit#teenwolfedit#my edit#derek hale#paige krasikeva#scott mccall#allison argent#liam dunbar
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WOOO chapter 3 is up!!!
Summary:
“HOLY SH-” Miles and Gwen simultaneously turned to cover Pav’s mouth so as to not alert the creature in the middle of the carnage below them. The creature either didn’t hear him or it was too preoccupied with whatever it was doing. To his regret Miles soon realized what that was, as another wet snapping noise broke the silence once more. The creature was crouched down on all fours over what Miles assumed was the body of an officer, though it was so mutilated that it was hard to tell for sure. Its head was buried into the chest of the body beneath it, another wet snapping noise emerging as it pulled out a couple of ribs between its bloodied jaws... Or The Spider-Gang goes looking for Hobie. They don’t like what they find.
Chapter 3 of my Venom!Hobie fic is here! 💜💜💜
#sorry for the wait this chapter took forever to edit lol#cause I kinda rushed over some parts when writing the draft so there was a lot of unfinished stuff left#but it's out now and I'm pretty happy with how it turned out!#it's also the longest chapter so far which is another reason it took longer to get out#lol it's 2:30 am here but I really wanted to update the fic today so here it is <3#also thank you to everyone who's read the fic so far <3#and an even bigger thank you to those of you leaving kudos!#and the biggest thank you in the world to the people commenting on my fic!!!! I love you 💜💜💜#I'm off to bed now g'night guys <3#hobie brown#spider punk#Venom!Hobie#miles morales#spider man#gwen stacy#spider gwen#pavitr prabhakar#spider man india#across the spider verse#across the spiderverse#atsv#spiderverse#spider gang#the spider gang#my post#my fic#once again I'm using google translate when writing so please let me know if something doesn't make sense so I can correct it <3
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Chapters: 2/3 Fandom: Doctor Who (2005), Doctor Who Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Tenth Doctor & Donna Noble, Eleventh Doctor & Donna Noble, Twelfth Doctor & Donna Noble, Thirteenth Doctor & Donna Noble, The Doctor & Donna Noble, Tenth Doctor/Donna Noble, The Doctor/Donna Noble, Twelfth Doctor & Clara Oswin Oswald Characters: Donna Noble, The Doctor (Doctor Who), The Doctor's TARDIS, Amy Pond (Doctor Who), Rory Williams, Eleventh Doctor (Doctor Who), Twelfth Doctor (Doctor Who), Thirteenth Doctor (Doctor Who), River Song (Mentioned) - Character, Clara Oswin Oswald Additional Tags: Everyone loves donna (especially the Doctor), planet of the hats!, The doctor doesn’t handle losing donna well, donna meets the other doctors, this is not explicitly shippy but you can read it that way if you’re so inclined, basically the doctor loves donna and she loves him and you can read that however you want, Excessive use of italics, Thirteen rapidly losing it, Awesome Donna Noble, Cuddling & Snuggling, Are they romantic? Platonic? All that matters is that they’re insane about each other, blurred lines relationship Summary:
The Doctor goes to the Planet of the Hats with Donna three times. Each time, they run into a different Doctor. (Or, the job of best friend never really ends when time travel is involved)
#second chapter is up!!!#MAN that took forever#if anyone wants i may post the deleted scenes here lol#oh boy time for the tags#doctor who#donna noble#tenth doctor#eleventh doctor#twelfth doctor#ten x donna#clara oswald#doctor x donna#my writing#my fics
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