#malformation games

[gebo4482]

Ground Zero

Website / Steam

[softichill]

I really love how everyone's referencing the two cakes meme with LN3 and Reanimal. That really is what's happening here JGNSKJH

[thissoundsdifferent]

Resident Evil Weekend Covers

The Second Malformation of G - Cover by Rod Herold

Disclaimer: I do not have any association with the cover artists nor the original artists. None of this work is my own. Please leave likes and comments on the videos and support the original creators.

[vault81]

Map of the Commonwealth (25.12.2287)

Featuring all (currently) known factions and their territories

[blood-mocha-latte]

wip tag game

tagged by the lovely beautiful @mstiemountainhop, thank you beloved <3

rules: make a new post with the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! and then tag as many people as you have WIPs.

only posting the ones i’ve been working on recently this time, loves

1 - demacon wip part two

2 - little talks chapter four

3 - loosely based hunger games au

4 - They Fuck In A Barn

taggingggg @moghraidhs @gorgeousundertow @lamialamia @ewipandora @disastrouscanasta <33

[northernolddragon]

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

i’m so frustrated with people’s lack of common sense about wildlife. if you’re interacting with wildlife, you’re not having your disney princess moment. you’re not forming a magical bond. that’s a wild animal who is potentially terrified; maybe it’s curious if it’s young enough, but that just means you should minimise interactions as much as possible to make sure that animal lives a normal life. if your kid comes in holding a wild animal, don’t pick up your fucking phone to videotape it. bring the animal back outside and educate your kid to leave animals alone. you know what happens when you take in wildlife as a “pet”? either you keep it and do damage because even though it’s “tame” it’s a wild animal who is in no way meant to live in that setting unless it’s being kept by a trained and licensed rehabber who knows the housing and feeding requirements (and even then i’ve seen some who are keeping animals irresponsibility), or it ends up at a wildlife rehab when you inevitably harm it enough that you don’t know what to do, or when no vets see you, or when the animal becomes too aggressive for you to handle. and then we either figure out how to rehabilitate an animal whose temperament and/or body you have massively damaged or we euthanise it because the damage is too extensive. start treating wildlife like wild animals rather than a dog or cat. they’re not pets, they’re not domesticated, leave them alone and let them live happy lives as they’re supposed to.

[razors-tv]

If all you have is a hammer, then everything looks like a nail. Get the Malformer at Level 37 in the #TideOfShadows Battle Pass!

Railroads forged progress across the frontier. But the march of time is molded and shaped by the hammers themselves, forged by powerful architects.

[ironmaidenxsteelheart]

"Unless you can fly, I sincerely doubt it!" She hums, cheerily, as the door clicks shut (it sounds almost....crunchy?) behind Lisa's back. "The nearest village is a day's trek from here, in the direction opposite your entry!" Wannour passes in front of her, to root through one of the many piles marring the room. This one seemed to be primarily jars of various preserves-- raspberry, blackberry, various fruits and vegetables, but also various creepy-crawlies; both whole and in pieces. (Why would anyone need a plucked, malformed chicken(?) preserved along with their pickles and jams? Just why?) She tosses them wantonly aside, the jars failing to break as they hit the ground, instead flickering blue atop their lids and gently clunking to rest.

"They're a bit judgy, though. I'd head further South-East, if I were you-- bigger town, less no-curiosity fuddy-duddies!!" No human Wannour'd ever seen had red eyes or pointed ears, after all; and it would be terribly rude, to send someone off to a welcome of cold glances and suspicion. And possibly fire; but never mind that. She picks up a particular jar by its lid, and looks into it from the bottom, one eye squeezed shut. Was this the right one, for that? She'd need her kitchen, if she was going to make proper food.... "By the way, is there anything you can't eat?"

As she peered into this cave dwelling to her it screamed witchery, and she knew witches could be trickers and word twisters when they wanted to be. She couldn't possibly walk into a trap like this, or she was going to be hopping out as a toad or boiled into the next crafty concoction. She's heard the stories, she knew this witch's game.

But who was she to turn down an invitation to a meal? And such a warm welcome as well.

"Thank you," she said politely as she came through the threshold. She hasn't thrown all caution to the wind, she still looked around for any traps or possibility that she was about to be pushed into that questionably ventilated cauldron, "But uh...I probably shouldn't stay long. I think there's enough daylight out for me to still make it."

[etherealrin]

PLEASE more rin x reader with the friends to lovers trope

₊˚⊹♡ 0x1=lovesong?!

the three times your childhood best friend itoshi rin realizes that he loves you + the one time he says it

warnings: none // wc: 3.8k

note: hai i hope this delivers what you wanted! fic + title loosely inspired by txt's 0x1=lovesong. female reader, kinda messy writing & ik that sae returns to japan when its winter but i make the rules here so it's actually summer. badly proofread!

one.

the first time itoshi rin met you was when he was a toddler, on a sunny, cloudless day at the park.

rin stared dejectedly at the bright green, now malformed, chunk of plastic he held in his tiny hands. it had previously been a dinosaur figure, possibly his favorite one so far too.

of course he had to break it and ruin the fun for himself.

rin's head whipped around, left, right, left, right—he was looking for comfort, in the form of his older brother sae—who was nowhere to be found. it dawned on him that even then, in a bustling playground full of lively kindergarteners, itoshi rin found himself alone. a zero in a world of ones.

as he sat there on the sidewalk, mourning his latest tragedy, the last thing he expected was for a little girl to approach him.

"hi," you said shyly. rin tore his gaze away from the broken pieces of his toy and looked up at you, curiousity in his eyes. you were pretty, he thought immediately. although you were both barely four, there was a simple elegance in the way you held yourself, and an obvious kindness in your delicate features. he wondered why you had chosen to approach him when so few of his peers ever did.

"hi," rin repeated back at you, exhaling sharply.

"um, do you want to play family with us?" you stuttered a little as you asked, motioning to three other children behind you. even at the age of four, rin's teal eyed gaze was still piercing. "we need someone to be the dad."

you wanted him to be the dad? rin rarely recieved invitations to play with other children, let alone was he well-versed in this game called family. but for some strange reason, he really wanted to try it. maybe it was because of you. you who had noticed his despair and tried to save him, in your own way.

"okay," he said decidedly, looking at you and your group of friends with wide eyes.

"yay! we can play for real now!" you squealed to the kids behind you. "my name is l/n y/n," you stated, staring at him expectantly. oh. you wanted to know what his name was.

"itoshi. itoshi rin."

"okay itoshi-chan, let's go!" and then you were dragging him off to the playstructure and under the slides, where your "house" was.

"just rin is okay," rin blurted out. "i have a brother so itoshi is confusing anyway."

"okay, rin-chan it is then! let's be friends!" your joyful grin made rin's tiny heart twist with a feeling he didn't understand. why did it make him so happy to be wanted by you? why did you even want to be his friend in the first place?

"alright!" he replied with as much enthusiasm as he could muster.

rin doesn't remember much else from that day, but he knows that it was one of the better memories he holds from his childhood.

two.

a lot had transpired since that fateful day at the park, and the two of you were attending the same junior high as first-years. somehow, you had wound up in a majority of the same elementary school classes as well, thus you and rin formed a tight-knit friendship. twelve year old rin was going through somewhat of an edgy phase (that he never really grew out of.) hence, he was also going through a period where he was even more tight-lipped in class, despite his growing popularity. recruited by his older brother sae, rin had fallen into the clutches of soccer since first grade, and he had something that could only be described as a genius talent for the ball game. he was the only first-year who had made the soccer team, and rumors were that he was likely next in line for the position of captain, which was usually exclusively given to third years. he had soccer practice almost daily now, and you had art club after school, meaning your schedules aligned. as soccer practice often ran late, you developed a habit of making your way over to the fields after art club was finished to wait for rin. then the two of you would walk home together. rin never put too much thought into the simple act of you waiting for him, until one afternoon, you weren't there.

huh? he had thought. maybe you were running late or something? rin had just finished the last of his laps around the grassy field, and he surveyed his suroundings with slight dissapontment. you really weren't there?

"itoshi-kun, what's up?" a second year asked him, noticing his odd demeanor.

"nothing," rin quickly answered. but a slight frown stuck to his face, though the older decided not to push it. rin found himself yearning to see your face, missing the back and forth banter that was so ingrained into his day.

"right well, happy birthday! get home soon," his teammate wished him, walking away. birthday? with a jolt, rin realized that the boy was right, it was, in fact, september ninth. he had never really enjoyed his birthday that much, given it was too close to the beginning of the new school year and just reminded him of how much longer he would have to suffer before summer break. rin started for the cool metal benches where his soccer bag was, beginning to pack up his things and change out of his cleats.

"hey, underlashes!" a voice suddenly cut through his thoughts. so you were here after all? rin dropped his shoes.

"y/n, i really don't appreciate the brother reference," he complained. secretly, he was relieved to hear your teasing. he'd never admit that he didn't mind the nickname that you had given him after you proclaimed that the itoshi brothers had under eyelashes longer than should be humanly possible. something about it was rather endearing.

"oh, cheer up," you began. "you'll be thanking me after this one." rin took a proper look at you and bit back a laugh. you looked like you had just run a marathon given how your red your face was, paired with the small beads of sweat trickling past your forehead. yet somehow, each lock of your hair still fell perfectly to frame your face. you smirked and shoved a small white box into his hands. "i had to run to get here in time, ya know?"

rin looked at the box quizically, recognizing the logo of his favorite bakery in an instant. he untied the pale blue ribbon holding it together and inhaled deeply, content.

happy birthday rin! was written on the small matcha cheesecake that you had gifted him. the small motion makes his heart swell.

"i thought you might like matcha since you like ochazuke so much," you explained.

"i do like it," rin's voice comes out softer than he meant it to. the same old odd feeling was back in his chest. he still couldn't quite place it. it made him naseous and somewhat giddy, like a kid high on cotton candy. he didn't know if he hated it or loved it.

"happy thirteenth, rin!" he felt the familiar, inviting warmth of your smile, and suddenly all was right in the world. as you sang happy birthday to him and slapped a party hat atop his messy dark hair, rin felt like you were the only two people on earth. he felt like he was home, more so than he ever did in his own room. you had a way of bringing that sensation to him, through the nine years he had known you.

after you had finished belting out the last notes of the melody, rin said with a slight grimace, "thirteen is an unlucky number."

"you're not superstitious, so shut it! don't jinx yourself!" you reprimanded him. "oh, but speaking of, i got you that new horror game that you wanted. it hasn't come yet though, it's still being shipped."

"really?" oh how rin's eyes and facade lit up at the mention of the video game.

"yeah, you can go curse yourself all you want once it's here."

"...thanks." itoshi rin was often described as a cold boy. and you were just about the only person he could open up to. rin questioned for a second if it was normal for him to feel that ecstatic over a mere video game.

"hey, look! the sun's setting!" you exclaimed, poking his shoulder lightly. rin's train of thought stalled, instead choosing to direct his attention towards the patch of sky which you were pointing at. streaks of yellow, orange, and red danced across his vision as the sun became slowly swallowed by the earth. "it's beautiful, isn't it?" you asked him.

rin turned to meet your gaze and almost passed out. he swore you looked like an angel sent from heaven itself in the glowing warmth of the sunset, you beamed at him. had you always looked like this? your eyes shone like a million stars, and he felt a smile tugging at the corner of his own mouth. if you had asked him if he was blushing, he'd say no way in hell, but truthfully his face was a little red and it definitely wasn't from his previous workout. rin was suddenly reminded of how he felt when he met you.

"yeah," he breathed. "it's nice." what he really wanted to say was that you were nice, not the sunset. the sunset, for all its glory, was barely lukewarm compared to you. no, that wasn't it. you were radiant, and rin had known that from the very moment he saw you, so many years ago. but for now, he'd have to settle for just this, whatever your friendship was, he was much too scared to lose it.

three.

a little over two years had gone by since that evening when you had celebrated his birthday with him, and the end of rin's third, final year in junior high was approaching. sae had left for spain, scouted by the top soccer club there, and rin wanted more than anything to follow in his footsteps, to be the second best striker in the world after his brother itoshi sae. though sae's leaving had left him a bit lonelier, your friendship was still as easy-going as ever, and rin prayed that it would never change, as sappy as it sounded. he also tried (and failed) to ignore the increased stares between you two, that seemed to take place everywhere. sometimes, he thought that there was some sort of romantic tension between you two, and there had definitely been no shortage of mixed signals. maybe there was a hint of yearning in both your expressions? that year, the only class you shared with him was advanced mathematics, and he loathed the subject immensely. he likely would have cut class entirely if it weren't the only time of day he saw you that wasn't during lunch.

and it's during lunch one day in the month of february that you asked rin something, almost causing him to choke on his noodles.

"she what?" rin askwed between strangled coughs.

"yumi-chan wants to know if you're thinking of giving anyone chocolates for valentine's day," you repeated to him. was rin dense or something? either he was just that, extremely dense, or he chose to ignore his ever-growing fanclub. girls had begun to gush over him after he had been picked for the soccer team's captain last year, and it was also that previous valentine's that rin had recieved about a hundred confessions, ranging from girls in your grade to underclassmen, to even your seniors. you tried to pretend like the fact didn’t bug you, but it nagged you in all the wrong ways. your only saving grace is your recollection of how last year, rin had just stood there awkwardly, accepting gifts yet not seeming satisfied with any of them. he looked as if he were waiting for someone's confession, one that never came.

you never asked him about it though, not wanting to dance between the border of normal questioning from a friend and being plain nosy. however, you did mull over it from time to time. was it possible that rin really had been waiting for someone? or had he just been pissed off?

"you can tell yumi that i don't plan on giving anyone anything, especially her," rin spat with distaste, bringing you back to the present.

"the poor girl has done nothing wrong to you," you tried to defend her.

"doesn't mean i have to like her," rin retorted.

"i'll tell her, in gentler wording that is. you know this won't stop anyone from giving you chocolates next week anyway, right?" you wondered if he heard the slight grimace in your voice.

"on feburary fourteenth i will have suddenly been in a very tragic car crash and unable to attend school," rin declared. you could tell from the conviction in his voice that he might actually be plotting a way to skip that day.

"righttt, whatever you say."

unfortunately for rin, he suffered no such vehicular accident and was, rather angrily, perfectly healthy and in attendance at school that valentine's day. it was time for math class, again, and rin had already recieved eighty two chocolates. he thought he might break his own record that year given the school day had barely begun. what he was not prepared for was the sight of you, standing in front of your desk as a boy, whom rin could not remember the name of (he's sure it was some npc anyway) thrusted a pink heart shaped box towards your body. no, there could be no mistaking it, that boy had just confessed to you.

something akin to envy took over rin's body and before he was even aware of it himself, he was standing next to you, glowering at the boy. rin had been mad plenty of times, but he was practically ready to spit fire right then.

the boy hurriedly scurried away, like a mouse, and rin stared daggers at his back.

"hey rin!" you greeted him, as if nothing was wrong.

"who. was. that." not a question but a demand came from the boy with the blunt bangs in front of you.

"rin, it's fine. that's just tokimitsu, and i swear he's harmless," you answered quickly, doing a poor job of concealing the excitement bubbling up inside of you that rin cared. “he was probably just being nice anyway."

"sure didn't look like it, he was blushing like he walked into a makeup store and fell in that damn pink powder," rin griped.

"why's that bothering you anyhow?"

"i- uh," rin didn't know how to answer that. he didn't even know that he could get jealous over you until then. and how would he tell his best friend that? after all, friends weren't supposed to feel that way for each other. it was wrong for him to be this possessive over you. rin assumed that it was just because he had known you for so long, and that he didn't trust this half-baked tokimitsu guy. he's lying to himself.

"he just pisses me off, i guess," was the answer that rin gave you.

"so what'cha got there?" you motioned at his bag, obviously stuffed full of confessions and candy. "sharing is caring..." rin wondered if you were frowning as he unzipped the backpack and told you to take anything you wanted, hiding under an excuse that the chocolate would ruin his diet as an athelte.

when the final bell tolled for the end of school, rin was waiting outside your class.

"rin? don't you have practice?" you were surprised at his sudden appearance.

"nope, cancelled." rin lied through his teeth. he then dragged you away, setting a brisk walking pace that was opposite from the direction of his and your houses. you shrugged and followed. you didn't have anything planned so you assumed it would be fine.

you were about a block away when you realized where rin was headed towards: your favorite cafe. oddly, he didn't even enjoy their pastries, he had told you they were too sweet for his liking multiple times.

rin led you past the door, weaving through a small crowd of poeple, and stopped abruptly at a table for two. he nodded at the light pink menu that sat atop the marbled top.

"you order," he announced. rin still couldn't take his mind off that infuriating moment in math, and had he been compelled, almost possesed, by a strong urge to take you to the cafe you frequented on that valentine's day. i'll one up you tokimitsu, he thought.

you were still scanning the menu when the waitress approached you, notepad in hand.

"if you're having trouble deciding, we're doing a special promotion for couples today on the strawberry snow parfait for two!" she suggested, looking at you both.

couple? you guessed that you could see where she was coming from. you and rin might have looked like a couple, but before you could clear up the misunderstanding, rin interjected. he knew that strawberries were your favorite fruit, given how often you brought them to school.

"sounds perfect, thanks," he said, and the waiter was off with a nod of her head, scribbling something down. hold on a minute. rin had agreed that you two were a couple to her? you wondered if he was that desperate to get the promotion.

"rin," you hissed. "we're not technically a coup-"

"shhhh!" he shushed you. and as if compelled by an yet another mysterious force, rin took your hands in his. "they don't know that, and you like strawberries, right?" he finished with a wink.

maybe you had died and been brought back to life by that wink, because with the way your heart threatened to explode back then, you definitely shouldn't have lived through it. knowing that he remembered your love of strawberries made you somewhat giddy.

you didn't trust yourself to say anything back yet, only nodding in silent agreement. it was also that day when you realized that you might really, really have feelings for the boy sitting across from you with the compelling cerulean eyes.

plus one more.

you since graduated junior high and somehow beat the paper thin odds, winding up in the same high school as itoshi rin. and you never stopped thinking back to that february fourteenth, even after months had past and it was now novemember of your first year as a high schooler. rin only became better and better at soccer, so naturally you, his best friend, were present at every home game he had. but rin had changed that summer before the start of first year, on an oddly cold night where sae had returned to japan earlier than expected. rin refused to mention much about it to you, but you knew. it had scarred and changed him, his attitude was at its worst and he played with a newfound rage, something that demanded people to notice him. really look at who was going to surpass itoshi sae, his tepid excuse for a big brother.

it was only a few short months after the start of high school and rin's debut as the star striker of the soccer team. rin had been seen and scouted by countless numbers of japanese clubs at this point, just like he'd hoped, and you had encouraged him to go wherever he thought would be best. even if it meant going far from home, and far from you. but for rin, no offer was good enough to surpass sae's yet. so he stayed in place, until he had called you abruptly today at seven in the night. the call had been brief and rin failed to mention anything of importance except telling you to meet him at the park immediately.

he never specified which park, but you knew for him that there could only be one.

when you arrive at the now faded playstructure that you first met itoshi rin at, you're hit by a wave of nostalgia. the sky is exactly as cloudless as it was in your memories, and the crescent moon smiles down at you. were you two really sixteen already? had it been twelve years since you befriended the slightly teary eyed boy with the broken dinosaur figurine?

"hey, y/n." rin's voice is oddly lower, and his tone is serious.

"rin," you smile at him. "did something happen? why'd you wanna meet here all of a sudden?"

"this is it," he whispered, showing you an enveloped containing a letter that read with "the JFU invites you to an elite training camp for the national team…" in glittering gold letters. "my chance to become the world's number one striker, to finally being recognized by sae again..." he trails off, the hurt in his voice all too obvious and too painful for you to hear. "it'll be far, and i probably won't be able to come to school for a while. won't be able to see you for a while."

"rin, you have to go," you steal glance at the boy who had been by your side for all of these years. you wish you could tell him that you'd be okay without him, but there was no point in lying. that's why he had called you all the way over here.

"just- just promise me one thing y/n," rin says, practically commanding you to look at him again. you're enthralled by the deep blues of his irises, and you think that you might never be able to look away.

rin doesn't ever want to look away either. he's at a crossroads right now, he's more aware of that than ever. rin doesn't think he can go down the right path in peace unless he tells you this one thing, what he's been wanting to say from the very instant you made his life worth living.

"please, don't leave me behind," he begs, his voice hushed but urgent. "i can't lose someone else i care about." shit, he has to tell you the truth now. "the boy you met at the park that day, the one that you wanted to play with, he's been in love with you ever since." its a quiet admission of what was so obvious to everyone else, but so incomprehensible to you two.

rin thinks that he’s ruined it all, this was the end of the line for you and he’d just have to live with that rejection.

on the other hand. you're stunned into silence, entranced by the boy who had drawn your attention since you were four, and you know that your words will fail you again. in the pale moonlight, he looks perfect, sculpted by michelangelo himself. so, you do the only thing that you know can express what you feel for rin. you screw your eyes shut and press your lips onto his, gripping the edge of his soft gray hoodie.

a gush of relief floods rin and reacts a second later. you swear you see fireworks erupting. the kiss nothing less than movie worthy, he's the male lead, you're the main love interest, and the world fades to nothing around you two as you're consumed by rin's love.

when you suddenly realize you're not breathing and neither is he, you push away in a rush. rin's cheeks are hopelessly red, and you assume your own aren't much better off.

"wait, let's do that again, please," rin gasps, breathing heavily while tugging you towards his chest. his black bangs cover his eyes just a bit, and you reach to swipe them out of his face.

rin thinks that he is going to melt, more helpless than a popsicle left out in the sweltering suimmer sunlight. he cradles your face gently, kissing you once again.

the two of you stay like that for a while, and you're not sure how late it is when he pulls away for the final time, but all the stars are out in the sky now, glinting and sparkling.

you hope that there were no children left playing around at this hour.

"so, you'll send me off tomorrow morning?" rin asks. it's unfathomable to him how you can make him feel so complete, so full. you're definitely the one for him.

"that's a promise."

"and you love me?" he asks again.

"even after the end of the world, i will," you assure rin, tracing the grooves on the palm of his hand.

zero multiplied by one should always equal zero. at least, that's what the fundamentals of mathematics declare. but with you as the one, rin thinks that zero times one might equal something else: love.

a/n: if u made it here MWAHH big kiss. probably the longest thing i've written in a while and not planned out at ALL, sorry for the crappy world building and stuff, i tried... also tried to keep it more in line with canon. i’ve never written with japanese honorifics hopefully i didn’t mess up too badly 🙁 side note i think rin would actually enjoy 0x1=lovesong vibes

masterlist!

[gebo4482]

Ground Zero - Crashed Boat Gameplay

Website / Steam

[saklasnabal]

Samarie, Lolita?

Yeah, this art is based on my hunch about Samarie being the Uterus doll again. 

Originally, this was just supposed to be a drawing of Samarie as the album cover of “In Utero”, but then I decided to put up my other ideas that I left before:

I did yap about Samarie being a Uterus doll, but I didn’t yap much about Funger’s sun god Amon and Valteil.

(This was just drawn because I felt like it.)

Samarie’s moonscorched form, "Dysmorphia", bears striking similarities to the Uterus Doll:

No left eye.

A four-fingered right hand and a plain left hand.

Right leg dominant over left.

Are depicted as pregnant.

This shared feature of pregnancy ties directly to the phobia they evoke: teratophobia, the "fear of monsters and fear of bearing a malformed child." This phobia perfectly suits the Uterus dolls, who give birth to malformed offspring, making it a fitting fear for them to embody. Samarie, as “Dysmorphia”, summons ghouls, which are notably “malformed.” These ghouls align with the concept of “malformed child” as they are creations of “Dysmorphia”. So the game acknowledges the actual second meaning of Teratophobia “the fear of bearing a malformed child”, through the Uterus Doll being explicit, but for Samarie it is subtle (I say subtle, but I don't think it is too subtle because, when paying attention to Samarie's moonscorched form, both her arms are rigid and her legs are slender, and there's no sign of plumpness. Her belly is noticeably strained and stretched out, which made me suspect that she was pregnant for a long time. However, I just couldn't find the right words to express my suspicion clearly). Continuing on further, the game avoids fully defining teratophobia, only reducing it to “fear of monsters and malformations”. So, methinks, it is to obscure information, specifically may include details about Samarie, by subtly implying that Samarie’s dysmorphia stems from “malformations”, it leads players to interpret her dysmorphia as simply resulting from perceived bodily inadequacies. When in actuality, Samarie’s dysmorphia may have been rooted in complete defilement leading to a fear of birthing a malformed child. Specifically why she's pregnant, has to do with Valteil. 

First, let's address Amon, the so-called sun god. In truth, Amon isn't actually the sun god; in Egyptian mythology, he's known as the "hidden god" because he represents abstract concepts related to air, he is “being everywhere but unseen”. Ra on the other hand was The Sun God, known as "The Self-Created One", Ra was seen as the supreme creator and a powerful force associated with rebirth and incarnation. He was believed to have emerged from the primordial waters of chaos, creating himself and the cosmos through his will alone. Amon only became the sun god when he merged with Ra, they represented both the visible and invisible aspects of existence, A Supreme being. 

The Sun God Amon in Funger is shrouded in mystery, reflecting Amon's symbolic association with the hidden and the unknown. This mirrors the enigmatic Sun God in Silent Hill, often referred to as "Her". In Silent Hill, young girls were abducted by The Order to serve as vessels, in attempts to impregnate them with the Sun God. Similarly, Samarie, who appears as a fully developed version of the Uterus doll, is kept in the Ninth Circle, it may represent a comparable fate for the naturally gifted children. This explains why the Uterus dolls are called as they are, because much like in Silent Hill, these children became wombs.

Alessa Gillespie, later known as Heather Mason, became the vessel for the Sun God after her mother, Dahlia, used her as a surrogate to bring the deity into existence. Throughout Heather Mason's journey, the Halo of the Sun frequently appears. This crest, associated with the religious organization, symbolizes "resurrection" and the "cycle of rebirth". Given that Samarie is the fully developed version of the Uterus doll and is still alive by Marina's Ending B, it suggests that the pregnant bellies of the Uterus dolls were not merely a result of Valteil's perversion but rather part of his study of the cycle of rebirth itself, connecting it to the Sun God. In other words, Valteil was creating beings with extremely short lifespans that could literally rebirth themselves, emulating Ra's ability to rise again after dying each day and his quality as a self-created deity. Samarie’s masturbation ability could indeed be tied to the Sun God's creative power. Some myths suggest that the Sun God, as Atum, created himself through an act of masturbation, with the hand he used symbolizing the female principle inherent within him. Butttt, this could have been placed by Valteil to exploit, much like how in Lolita, Humbert agreed to marry Charlotte Haze to exploit his position as Dolores’ stepfather for his own sexual obsession. Valteil despised the notion of his creations outliving him, maybe it's because he wouldn’t remain in control of his creation indefinitely?  Since Valteil is based on Valtiel, of courseeee, it was barely spelled like an offbrand Adidas, anyways Valtiel was responsible for Heather Mason’s cycle of rebirth. This is symbolized by his act of turning a valve, a gesture that represents the cycle of rebirth, Valtiel appears to have little concern for Heather herself, focusing instead on the god that slumbers within her. However, unlike Valtiel, Valteil seems to exploit the the Sun God for his own purposes. The Uterus Dolls maybe akin to "nymphets" (a term that Humbert uses to justify his attraction to children, “nymphet” means: a sexually precocious girl barely in her teens, also a sexually attractive young woman), is something Valteil sought to perfect, eternal yet fleeting. A purely immortal being would escape his control, while a being that aged was a no-go. To maintain control over this concept, he had to create a being that was simultaneously mortal and immortal. Perhaps Samarie, much like Lolita, was an idea—a construct. It's worth noting that "Samarie" is an alternative name for Magdalene, as both names mean "towers" and refer to cities in Israel—Magdala and Samaria. The name Magdalene is a nickname for Mary as well, meaning "Mary of Magdala", in this way, Samarie can also be seen as a nickname for Mary, tying her to a comparison with Dolores Haze, "Samarie" serves as a nickname for "Mary" just as "Lolita" serves as a nickname for "Dolores". Furthermore, both Dolores and Magdalene are unfairly viewed as sexual figures when, in reality, they are not. Continuing, to retain control over this idea, Valteil forced a child into the role of “Samarie”, by dehumanizing the child into a living object. This child would live briefly and then rebirth upon death, ensuring the torment allowed Valteil to remain in absolute control. As Humbert himself said, "What I had madly possessed was not she, but my own creation, another, fanciful Lolita—perhaps more real than Lolita; overlapping, encasing her; floating between me and her, and having no will, no consciousness—indeed, no life of her own."

Samarie's Radiant Soul is deeply tied to her connection with the Sun God, who sustains her existence as a consequence of Valteil’s actions. Her body, symbolically aligned with Ra, positions her as an ideal vessel for Amon, much like Alessa Gillespie’s role in her story, Samarie is "The Mother of God". The events of Termina may be part of a carefully orchestrated ritual designed to merge Samarie with Amon. Thus, Samarie’s presence in Termina is not truly for Marina; her purpose is bound to Amon's birth.

Adding to the idea that Samarie wasn’t truly there for Marina, maybe the only reason Samarie follows Marina, is that Marina might be Valteil’s descendant?

The only similarity I can compare is their facial appearance, so I decided to draw Valteil from a frontal perspective, rather than viewing him from a top-down angle with his head tilted upward in   the official art. This perspective makes them look a little similar. Perhaps, Samarie’s obsession with Marina is less about love and more of a triggered fear response from Marina’s appearance, because it reminds Samarie of Valteil, so she feels the need to appease. To cope with this fear, Samarie interprets her actions as love, avoiding the uncomfortable truth behind her behavior. 

Marina might be dealing with Samarie because the "Humbert Humbert" in her family tree, Valteil, set off a chain of events whose consequences have spiraled out of control over time, ultimately falling on Marina to address. Methinks, this is a family matter: the problem originated with Valteil, the ancestor, and was perpetuated through his bloodline as subsequent generations continued to stoke the flames he first ignited. As a result, everyone in the lineage is burdened by the sins of the family (It makes me wonder if Marina’s father was the one responsible for sequestering children to the ninth circle. I mean, the logic is so simple: where would the Vatican easily collect children? The orphanage, of course. People wouldn’t bat an eye trying to track down missing kids because, hey, they’re orphans—no family, no one looking for them). Following that narrative, Samarie barely possesses any autonomy in her life, her feelings for Marina aren’t genuinely her own but stem from a deeply conditioned fear of Valteil (It's as if Samarie had to read Valteil's mind to figure out what he wanted, paying extreme attention to his desires to avoid being hurt even worse. Now, she's applying that same behavior to Marina, because every time she looks at her, she sees Valteil). Valteil completely altered her body with a very specific appearance, meaning the name, "Samarie," isn’t even her name, it's from the person she was specifically altered to. This forms the core of her dysmorphia—she feels disgusted by an identity she never chose yet has no choice but to live with. Due to being forcefully granted the ability to rebirth herself upon death, it forces her to back to the form she bitterly hates. She is, in essence, her own malformed child, forced to bear in her swollen belly the identity imposed upon her—a reality she deeply despises. Thus, she is “Dysmorphia”. 

 Methinks again—MEEEETHINKS AGAIN! In Samarie’s narrative, she plays two roles: one is “Lolita,” and the other is “Dolly” For the first, “Lolita” is the loud one, the one that is always heard in the room—she is the delusion. Suppressed under the screaming of “Lolita” is the lady of sorrow, “Dolly,” who I believe speaks this line: 'If I were to die the same day as her… There's something poetic about it… It will be alright.' Initially, this reinforces the perception that she is obsessed with Marina, willing to die on the same day as her. However, a subversion emerges when Samarie says these words directly to Marina. Beneath that distorted framing, “Dolly” still exists—a broken, exhausted individual simply longing for an end to her suffering. Perhaps her ultimate desire is to die in peace with the identity of “Samarie,” the person she was forced to live as. Then, the narrative switches back to “Lolita”: 'You must know it too, Marina! But don't worry. We will die together.' This makes her obsession with Marina feel inconsistent. It feels like Samarie recognizes her slip—the brief emergence of "Dolly"—and quickly reverts to “Lolita”. 

The words above this, makes me think back to the nature of Samarie killing Father Domek. Perhaps she killed him because he reminded her of the one who abused her, Valteil? I did mention that Marina's battlesprite is based on Claudia Wolf, and it seems to me that Marina herself is based on Claudia Wolf, particularly in the way they both think about their fathers. Both utterly hate their fathers, yet they become upset upon their deaths. Claudia Wolf’s father, Leonard Wolf, and Father Domek also behave in a similar way. They both demean their daughters at first but soften their tone when they sense something is going wrong with them. Leonard Wolf’s statement, “She’s a fool, but she’s still my daughter,” perfectly summarizes how Father Domek acted. Additionally, Leonard Wolf was a massive religious fanatic, so Father Domek may share similar traits, this would explain a line from Marina’s backstory: “You had a suspicion that your father had something to do with this. He had always been too obsessed with blood magic, and you had learned that there were too many rites that demanded the blood of your loved ones to work.” Both Father Domek and Leonard Wolf are also antagonistic towards their daughters' pursuits, Leonard hates Claudia’s pursuit of Paradise, believing the non-believers are unworthy, and for Father Domek in this line: “Your father had always been antagonistic towards you and your pursuits.” The very reason Claudia deeply resented her father, Leonard, was due to his abuse—beating her and yelling at her whenever he believed she was being irreligious in his eyes, maybe Father Domek did the same to Marina, this would further add depth to this line from her backstory: “Just the idea of getting away from your condescending and stuck up father was enough to make the decision, not to mention the obvious benefits the Vatican City would have to offer.” 

GOINGGGGG BACK TO SAMARIE, SINCE ALLLLL THOSE WORDS ABOVE ABOUT MARINA SERVE TO CONTRIBUTE TO MY PONDERING—YES, PONDERING!—OF THE NATURE BEHIND SAMARIE’S MURDER OF MISTER DOMEK. PERHAPS, PERHAPS! THIS VERY DYSFUNCTIONAL RELATIONSHIP MARINA HAS WITH HER FATHER REMINDED SAMARIE OF VALTEIL AND HER?  Since Samarie couldn’t fight back against Valteil, she kills Father Domek who reminds her of Valteil to feel a sense of catharsis for her powerlessness. However, once she commits the act, there is no gratification. Instead, it intensifies her memories of her relationship with Valteil, particularly the isolation that forced her to become dependent on him. Samarie's statement that Father Domek was a vile man with a glimmer may actually refer to Valteil, but she desperately conceals this truth by playing onto the narrative that she’s obsessed with Marina, avoiding any direct reference to herself. So confronting her with accusations like, “You did it on purpose? What’s wrong with you?!” or “Your tears won’t bring him back to life” pushes her over the edge, due to the conflicted feelings about Valteil, because she was groomed, so these remarks nudge her to think about it more which drives her to lash out in fury, methinks.

So, putting everything together, here’s how the events unfold: After Valteil’s reign fully wanes, Samarie is left to grapple with the aftermath of abuse. In her desperation, she seeks out the outside world, having been isolated for so long under Valteil’s control. However, Samarie is triggered by Marina’s appearance, which bears a striking resemblance to Valteil—probably Marina's own ancient grandpa. Marina's appearance serves as a painful reminder of Samarie's relationship with Valteil. To avoid confronting this truth, Samarie convinces herself that what she feels for Marina is love, rather than a triggered fear response caused by Marina's resemblance to Valteil. To reinforce this delusion, she begins stalking Marina and gaslighting herself in the process. Through her stalking, Samarie learns about Marina’s dysfunctional family and discovers her strained relationship with her father. This further triggers Samarie, as it reminds her of her own relationship with Valteil, who ultimately faded away and left her behind. This realization threatens to unravel the narrative Samarie has created to avoid being triggered by Marina’s resemblance to Valteil. Because Marina’s appearance reminds her of her trauma, and her father becomes another reminder, her carefully constructed house of cards starts trembling, and Samarie knows she must act fast to keep it from collapsing. Enter Mr. Domek—the perfect scapegoat. In her twisted logic, Samarie decides that for her delusion to survive, Domek must disappear. He becomes more than just a person to her; he turns into a projection of Valteil. Unlike Marina, Domek doesn’t look like Valteil, which makes him bearable enough for Samarie to focus all her pent-up rage on him. So, she makes her move: Domek really has to go. Through this Samarie creates yet another narrative—the idea that “I did this all for her”—to rationalize her actions, when in truth, she simply cannot deal with her trauma. However, even after executing her plans, she finds no satisfaction. Desperate to maintain her fragile narrative, Samarie convinces herself that her actions are acts of devotion to Marina. This fragile mask begins to crack, especially when she claims that Father Domek was a pig who deserved to be melded with the church walls. In truth, her rage is directed at Valteil, who worked within the walls of the Vatican, not at Domek himself.Samarie remains the same broken "Dolly," still trapped in Humbert’s grip.“At the hotel, we had separate rooms, but in the middle of the night, she came sobbing into mine, and we made it up very gently. You see, she had absolutely nowhere else to go.”

But hey, that's just my take, eh? I love Samarie! She's like a giant bug lady I can study. I want to think of her more than just as a stalker, even if it seems far-fetched, especially the idea I had before—that before becoming the Uterus Doll and being renamed ‘Samarie,’ she might have originally been a child named Willem:

It’s about how Samarie’s human-form battle sprite, when turned sideways, aligns closely with the drawing of Willem meeting Pocketcat. Both the original Willem and Samarie wear long dresses with sharp collars and thin ribbons. Their right arms are pulled back while their left arms are extended forward. Similarly, their right feet are positioned forward, and their left feet are set back. Neither of them ever shows their left ear. Samarie’s right ear is visible, but her left ear is covered by her hair, emphasizing the importance of being on the right side. In the original Pocketcat book, Willem is depicted facing only to the right. However, in the second Pocketcat book in Termina, Willem is shown facing left, yet his left ear remains unseen, hidden by his hair. Still, this interpretation might be far-fetched and overcomplicates things further. 

The one thing I’m certain about Samarie, is that she is the Uterus Doll. My monkey brain caught onto a pattern for her Moonscorched form—it just clicks. (Pattern recognition! Woahhh, monkey, monkey!)

[ms-scarletwings]

So it’s like a huge thing in Dredge that sometimes you pull up these lovecraftian type of mutant fish… like, they’re rarer and more valuable, albeit fucked up variants of the normal ones you catch. Kind of like shiny Pokémon if the shinies had many eyes where they shouldn’t or clumps of parasitic, Gigeresque cysts covering their malformed bodies.

Anyway the least disturbing and MOST funny one to me that I’ve encountered so far has to be this aberrant version of blackmouth salmon

Like, I’m sorry, devs?… that’s not some unholy divergence from the course of the natural order that’s just a normal ass chinook in the spawning season. No joke, they just casually rot alive exactly like that every single generation of fish.

Heads up: under this cut gets gross

Photos of real salmon during the spawn season that turn my stomach in a way this video game can only aspire to

In case you ever wondered, this is also the reason people don’t eat post-spawn adults.

Remember kids, as much as any of us try, it’s very hard to top the worldbuilding of the greatest horror author of all- Mother Nature.

[ghoulfuckersincorporated]

Do you have any headcanons about the Ghoul's cum? Is it an unusual color, taste, or texture? Is it radioactive? If you look at it under a microscope, do the sperm cells look mutated? Can he get someone pregnant? If he cums inside someone, are there any side effects?

I feel like my answer to this shouldn't start with "I have actually given much thought to what ghoul cum would be like", and it shouldn't be as long as it is, Anon, but here we go:

I headcanon that being a ghoul does make you infertile, especially as a man...early on. Radiation is a massive sperm-killer so I think all the human sperm would be wiped out pretty damn quick. But I think if you manage to stay alive long enough into the ghoulification process (which can be instantaneous or can be drawn out over years and years), your boys could possibly adjust and "heal" from being so damaged by the radiation and start producing sperm again. In the lore of the games, there are records of ghouls reproducing with one another (though it is not elaborated on at all and is apparently rare), so why would it be out of the realm of possibility (in the Fallout universe) that they could reproduce with healthy humans?

I think it would take the right human, the right ghoul, and the right conditions (my heart says 'radstorm', but I know how deeply corny that is), but I do think it's possible for some ghouls to get women pregnant.

I don't think their sperm themselves would necessarily be remarkable under a microscope; sperm having multiple heads/tails, no head/tail, and other malformations already exists in human men, and the number of them visible in a sample is used as an indicator of sperm quality. I think, that close, a sample from a ghoul would just look like a sample from a regular man with poor quality sperm.

The semen would be very radioactive after a few years, especially if you had sexual contact with an older ghoul or a still-sentient glowing one like Jason Bright or Oswald the Outrageous. I think it has a bit of a strangely-colored hue and I think it's thicker in consistency than before. You will absolutely get sick from it (especially if you swallow it) if you don't properly prep with Rad-X. Expect all the traditional symptoms of radiation sickness (fever, fatigue/fainting, confusion, vomiting, red inflammation and burns in the places you had direct physical contact, bleeding from the nose/mouth, unusual bruising) if you don't, and have Radaway ready for afterwards. What's the stuff for if not saving us from ourselves?

When a ghoul cums inside you, you can absolutely taste it, like you rested a nickle on the back of your tongue. You'll really hate it at first, but eventually you'll come to tolerate, even like it. Try not to let them "shoot up the club" every single time, though, since it'll probably leave you incredibly raw and sore. It's also long-accepted ghoul-fucker canon that your sentient ghoul lover cumming inside of/all over you can hide your scent from feral ghouls.

When I tell you that shit would taste so bad, I'm not even sure I have the proper words for what I think it would be like. Sort of like licking a battery combined with the bitter, acidic flavor of bile (and also the taste of semen, which doesn't exactly taste great anyway). You'll probably try to be sexy and brave and at least let your ghoul lover cum on your tongue once, but trust me when I say you'll never offer again. Especially since their regenerative abilities make them cum buckets every single time.

Godspeed, ghoul fuckers. We wouldn't do it if we weren't willing to risk a little rad exposure, right?

[xetlynn]

an artists muse- a viktor fic

four.

[three] [four] [five]

all i crave, is to fall away from myself.

It’s exhausting. To live with an issue most people don’t have. The stares of others while walking past. Knowing that no matter how much medicine you take, no matter how many doctors visits. Nothing. Absolutely nothing will change. 

Viktor grits his teeth, scrummaging through his night stand beside his bed. Aiming to find his painkillers along with the muscle relaxers he was prescribed most recently due to the pain in his right leg. Never gets better when the pain randomly decides to transpire on the most arbitrary times. Under no circumstances is he ever prepared for it either. 

Since a baby he has had to endure it. Born with a malformed leg, born with a weakness stunting his experience of being a child. As others obtained the involvement in physical games on the playground without worrying about falling to the ground within seconds. Or stumbling over their own leg attached to their body because it’s dragging them down. 

Envy filled his every bone. Envy and annoyance engraved into him as others to this day feel warranted to assist him with everything. He hated asking others for help. He hated when people helped him without him asking. 

Viktor’s hand at last detects the pill bottles, snatching them towards him. He roughly opens the painkiller, swallowing it without water. Doing the same thing with the muscle relaxers. He squeezes his eyes shut, still having to undergo the discomfort in his limb. He tosses the pills into the drawer once again. 

No going to class for him. He doesn’t even check his phone for the time as he grips onto his pillow, trying to fall back asleep. Only being able to do so when the medicine hits his system. Knocking out instantly. 

You purse your lips, tapping your foot on the ground as you await Viktor at his normal spot in the cafe. Holding the coconut puff in one hand and your coffee in the other. You had already finished your cherry danish. “Where is he?” You mumble impatiently, looking over to the clock that hung on the wall to see it was past 7:45. You had to get going to your class. 

“He must’ve slept in.” You sigh, opening your backpack and placing the treat in the bag. Making sure it won’t get too crushed with all of your things. You take a last big drink of your iced coffee before throwing it away. Walking out of the door. 

You want to text Viktor but at the same time you’d rather not bother him, if he had slept in he probably needed it. Not knowing if he’s a light sleeper you didn’t want to awake him by the notification coming from you. So you decided to message him later to check in with him. 

“[Name]! Wait for me!” A voice cuts you from your thinking, you glance over your shoulder to see Gert. You smile, offering a small wave. “Hii!” You slow your pace, allowing her to catch up with you. “I’m so excited to have another class with you!” She swings an arm over your shoulders. Your eyes glimmer at her sweet words. “I am too! I can show you so many of my skills! You can show me your secret skills you have yet to show me!” You exuberantly say, leaning your head upon her shoulder. 

“You’re going to be disappointed for sure, I’ve never sculpted before.” She nervously admits and you scrunch your nose. “I would never be disappointed! I can help you.” You assure her with a small nudge, the both of you entering the art class. 

“Oh no way! I didn’t know we had this class together!” You look to see who that came from, your eyes widen at the sight of Ekko. You squeal with excitement. “Two friends! Amazing!” You jump up and down. Your professor eyes you up and down from their desk because of your sudden outburst. 

You don’t pay any mind to it though, you didn’t even notice it. “Oh this is so cool, four people per table!” You point to the desks around the room. Leading the way to the left side of the room, planting down in a seat. Gert sits alongside you as Ekko was across from you. 

Your knees bounce up and down, truly happy with how this class is turning out. Unfortunately in the back of your mind though all you can think about is Viktor. And why he wasn’t at the cafe this morning. 

Fellow students pile into the classroom, finding their spots. You wonder who was going to join your table. Hopefully you’d become their friend as well. 

Luck was definitely not on your side. Fate decided another path for you. “Ohmygosh! This is crazy!” A high pitch voice sounds, ringing in your ears. Your body freezing, the bouncing of your knees coming to a full stop. “[Name]! We have a class together! This is so exciting!!!” The ginger installs herself to the empty seat. Your mouth goes dry, agape at the sight. 

You pull yourself together, forcing out a fake chuckle. “Just like old times!!” Your cheeks hurt from forcing a hoax of a smile. “Love it!” You grit your teeth. Ekko furrows his eyebrows at your behavior but the professor already begins their lecture before anything else can be said between you four at the table. 

“My name is Professor Shoola. Or Dr. Shoola. Whichever. Nice to meet you guys.” They didn’t seem very genuine with their words, continuing on. You sat straight up, ignoring Maddie who kept trying to whisper things to you. 

“Getting right into it, our main focus in this class is learning the art of sculpting. Some of you may be masters within this subject. Others may be… just learning.” Their eyes were bored, scanning the room. Observing and learning their class within each appearance. “Art is encompassing the earth, every turn. Every crack and mile. Art is within you. Beauty is all around you. Beauty is what you make of it. Art is what you make of it.” They explain with passion. 

“Hopefully as I teach you, you will find what you seek out in life. Let art guide you to what you want. Artists need a muse. Life is one's muse. Whether that be a person. Or a thing. Or a place.” Professor Shoola’s voice was like silk and you wanted to hear everything she had to say. You almost giggled at the last bit as that was the definition of a noun. But you calmed yourself. 

Relentless to listen. “I know it is the first day in this class but I will already be announcing your first project. You probably already have quite a few from your other classes but don’t fret with this one. You will have two months to complete this.” They pull down a poster over their chalkboard. 

“The Piltover University Thanksgiving Art show.” It read with older sculptures printed over it. You perked up more if that was even possible. 

“Find your muse and I want your sculpture to reflect it. During this time you will be given worksheets with questions to guide you there.” They show a stack of papers. “This is today’s.” They glide around the room, passing four sheets to each table. Gert picks up the stack for your table, handing them out to each of you. 

You ogle down at the paper. The first question being: “What makes you different from others?” You jut out your bottom lip. Such a deep, loaded question. 

“Talk with your table mates. Or do it by yourself.” Shoola sits in her seat and you let out a breath. 

“I know the first answer for you, [Name].” Gert whispers, pointing at your paper. You look at her with a confused expression. “You do?” 

“You’re kind.” She answers. “Hah!?” You raise a brow, “almost everyone is kind, Gerty!” You whine out, “that does not make me different from others.” You slump down. 

“No, no. You [Name]. Are a genuine, kind person. I guess to put it in a better word. You’re altruistic.” She smiles at you. “Is that a real word?” Maddie chimes into your conversation, you have to constraint yourself from rolling your eyes. 

“Yes,” Ekko chuckles. “I have to agree, either that or benignant.” He nods his head and you sheepishly look away, waving your hand at them. “Awe shucks. Too sweet.” You giggle. 

“I don’t think I’m going to put that though. I think I’m going to pause on the first question for now.” You tell them, picking up you backpack so you can take out a pencil. You open the bag and Viktor’s coconut puff plops out on the table. It was flattened. Darn. 

“Sorry, that was meant for-” you paused, why’d you pause? You didn’t know. “Me, I uh was going to save it.” You over explain, Gert and Ekko give you a side glance as they were already jotting things down on their papers. “Can I have it? I didn’t have breakfast.” Maddie rubs her tummy dramatically. 

Your shoulders tensed up, your eyes flickering from the puff to the ginger girl. It was Viktors… You didn’t want to give it away. “Um… I guess so!” You shrug your shoulders, sliding it over to her. Mentally cursing at yourself for doing it afterwards. 

You take out a pencil and shove your backpack to the ground. Now irritated as you had to watch Maddie enjoy a treat that wasn’t even for her. All because you were too “altruistic.” 

You clench down on your pencil, glaring at the questions on the paper. All the questions were intrusive in your opinion but when you looked around, everyone was writing with ease.

“Have you ever been in love?” “What’s your favorite thing about yourself?” “If you were to meet yourself as someone else would you be your friend?” “What’s your favorite object that you own?” 

You thought this was art class. Not therapy. 

The end of the class was announced and everyone stood up. You hadn’t written down a single thing. You sit there, staring off into space. Gert places a hand on your shoulder. “You okay?” She asks and you grin up at her. “Yeah! I just want to talk to the professor. See you later, ‘kay!?” You abruptly shoot up, holding the paper close to you as you grab your backpack. Ekko gives you a look, wondering what your deal was. 

“I’ll wait for you! We so have to hangout today!” Maddie gleams, not giving you the chance to respond as she skips outside the class, waiting for you outside of it. The other two give you thumbs up as they walk away. 

You make your way to Dr. Shoola. “Yes?” They ask, looking up at you through their lashes. “Hi, I’m [Name].” You introduce yourself and they lean back in their chair. “Okay.” They say, raising a brow. 

“I uh, I don’t understand the point of these questions.” You admit, showing your paper that only had your name written down along with small doodles. 

“What don’t you understand?” They cross their arms and your breath hitches. “I mean, I understand the point of them. I just… I can’t answer them.” You tell them, gnawing at the dead skin on your bottom lip. “Why?” 

Your face flushes. “My thoughts are harsh.” You confess, standing tall nonetheless at your depressive disclosement. “Unfortunately that’s the point of this, [Name].” They give you a pitiful smile. “What you think of yourself is what drives you to be who you are. Drives you to your muse.” They tell you and you kiss your teeth at their words. 

“If it makes you feel any better, only I will see this. And I’m not grading you on judgement. I’m grading you on getting it done.” They say. You nod your head silently. Pressing your lips together into a line. “Okay. Thank you for your time.” You excuse yourself, heading towards the exit. 

“You can talk to me any time, [Name]. Please know that.” They call after you and you look back at them. “Don’t say that, I’ll come to you for everything.” You light-heartedly joke with a close eyed smile before continuing on your way out. 

You go out into the hall and Maddie clings onto your arm. “I’ve been waiting for a message from you!” She admits to you and you hum. “Sorry, been busy.” You lie. 

“Dang, that sucks! I’ve been so free lately that I guess I didn’t realize other people have lives!” She laughs and you force out a dry chuckle, zoning out. Not really paying attention to anything else she talks about. 

As the two of you reach the campus cafeteria you pull away gently. “I have to meet someone, somewhere. Talk later?” You fib once again and Maddie smiles. “Of course! See you, [Name]!” She waves and you walk away. Deep in thought, thinking about the paper that you still had stuck in your hand. 

Entering your dorm you throw your stuff at your desk, along with the stupid paper from art class. You fling yourself onto your bed, letting out a loud groan. “Hm? [Name] I’m trying to take a nap~” Powder whines, stretching out her body. 

“Sorry.” You murmur, taking out your phone and facing the wall away from your best friend. You open instagram and see Viktor hasn’t been active all day. It’s already 11 am and he doesn’t seem like the type to sleep in. 

Your worry seeps into your brain, infesting all parts of your nerves. You go to the messages. 

—----------------------------------------------------

love.[name]3- heyyyyyooo, missed you at the cafe vikkie:(

                                                                             Delivered

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Viktor grumbles as sunlight hits his eyes through his curtains. He covers his eyes, thankfully the pain in his leg has subsided. He lets out a relieved sigh before reaching over and grabbing his phone. Snatching the charger off of it. His eyes squint as he reads the notifications. It was currently 1pm.

Jayce and Vi were being idiots in their group chat, talking about whether Mel or Caitlyn were hotter. He rolled his eyes but then saw a notification from Instagram. 

[love.[name]3 messaged you!]

His thumb shakily presses it, taking him to the chat. 

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love.[name]3- heyyyyyooo, missed you at the cafe vikkie:(

vik.tor_e- sorry, don’t feel good:(

vik.tor_e- i should’ve let you know, sorry again

love.[name]3- don’t EVER apologize for not feeling good

love.[name]3- like ever, i’m so serious >:( 

vik.tor_e- lol, ok 

vik.tor_e- i should be good by tomorrow, already feel better

vik.tor_e- so i’ll see you on monday fs :)

love.[name]3- i better! get yur rest!!!!

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taglist: if you want to be added lmk! @policedeer @im-just-a-simp-le-whore

[kedreeva]

I know you've raised several breeds of quail by now- which one has been your favorite? I'm looking into adding one or two quail tractors to my farm to help manage the insect population in the horse pastures as well as roaming them supervised in the barn for the same purpose. (With a hutch in the tack room for the winter and nighttime). I'm just not sure what species to choose! I have quite a few available around me, including button, bobwhite, coturnix, and celadon coturnix.

my "favorite" doesn't really apply to use; my favorite are the bobwhites, but keeping them was a nightmare. In the peafowl pens, the peafowl just ate their eggs. In an indoor pen, they hid their eggs and I was forever finding hidden stashes that were ??? age. In hutches, they seemed miserable and more aggressive. After a lot more reading on research done about it, wild-release captive-born birds pretty much never survive to reproduce, so it was wasted money and time (for the quail, I'm sure the predators in the area didn't mind, nor the outdoor cats).

But for what you want, bobwhites and buttons are not going to really be feasible. Bobwhites you can't really "roam" them even indoors, because you will have a hell of a time catching them if you can even find them- those little shits can squeeze into pinholes you would not BELIEVE if they are trying to hide after landing from a flush, and they're excellent at flying. I let the WHITE snowflake bobwhite I had into the peafowl pen and immediately lost her when she buried herself in a small patch of longer grass along the barn wall within 3 seconds (I did find her eventually but man she was HIDDEN). Buttons are even worse/smaller, and they're not even cold hardy, so you'd have to actually heat them in the winter, not just keep them in a room protected from draft. You'd kind of run into the same problem with other new world quail like valley/gambel's, or blue scale, or montezuma or whatever. They're all still naturally flighty, survival game birds.

The coturnix really aren't that much better, but at least they suck at flying and aren't as flighty to begin with, but you're still likely to be chasing them around the barn to get them back, rather than them returning to a hutch to sleep. The problem with them is they're fairly lazy, and they don't raise their own kids ever (it's just been bred out of them), so you WILL have to buy more or an incubator if you want to replace them, and they are Meat birds and don't tend to live as long as new world quail. But, of all the quail, that would probably be your best bet if your heart is set on quail. They're ravenous, they're meaty and lay eggs daily year round, and they're pretty tame for a game bird. If you like blue eggs, then you can go with the celadons, but they're a lot more work for selection (and I don't mean selection toward standard, I mean selection so their eggs don't go to shit and start breaking/getting malformed due to the ce gene messing with some health stuff if you're not careful about avoiding it- definitely do research before getting them) and more finicky on nutrition, so you may find they don't do as well ranged on pasture as the standard egg layers do.

HOWEVER. If you have the ability to do it, and you're specifically looking for insect population control, you could always go with some bantam chickens instead of quail. Unlike quail that were never bred for it, chickens DO have a "home base" instinct, which means they're unlikely to disappear into the wild, and there's no native wild chicken populations (assuming you aren't in the jungle where chickens originated, but I could be wrong) escapees could interbreed with (unlike with quail, who CAN hybridize with native quail and Cause Problems) if they happened to leave. They can be turned loose into pastures and get all over the place to eat bugs without you having to move a tractor (but can also be tractored if you prefer to place them). And there are some VERY small breeds out there - seramas, OEG, sebrights, d'uccles/booted bantams, d'anvers, etc - and there are some breeds that come in bantam and standard that are still pretty small (silkies, polish, cochins, etc). AND the smaller breeds can have small coops to be roosts overnight, so their housing similarly doesn't need to take up a ton of space.

Alternately alternately, you could have a look at guinea fowl. They're a "game bird" like quail, but they're able to free range like chickens, but they don't necessarily need or even want a coop; they prefer to roost in trees on most farms I've seen. But they're well known for a) readily declining insect populations where they are, particularly ticks and b) being a home alarm system because they WILL scream about anything weird they see, but they're more accurate about it than, say, peafowl, whose definition of "weird" includes things that are very normal. but they're not as small as quail or bantam chickens, and I don't know what the likelihood of absconding is, so you'd have to talk to someone that keeps them- I'm just mentioning them in case you've never heard of them and want to look into it.

So, yeah, Coturnix (any variety) if you're set on quail and you want to let them out of a cage in any capacity that involves returning them to your care, but I'd honestly advise looking into bantam chickens if you're looking for insect control specifically since they have better ranging ability. Or guinea fowl if you find they're your thing.