#male V x male Shepard

[x3no9]

N7 Month Day 12-Knife

Tricky choice as usual! I chose my AU Cyberbunk/ ME crossover fic "Outlaws" because a knife comes up a few times.

It is long-winded and features some ridiculous things. I didn't hold back to be honest. Cyborgs, vampires, time travel, and more.

MATURE READERS ONLY

[ladylaviniya]

Wails of Wedded Bliss

Masterlist || Chapter 2

Chapter Summary: Sherlock Holmes is forced to marry you...and it is clear...he does not appreciate the union...thanks Enola...

Pairing: Sherlock Homes x wife!reader

Chapter Warnings: 18+ Dead Dove Do Not Eat, Dubious Consent, Domestic r4pe, P in V intercourse, Forced/Arranged Marriage, Loss of Virginity, Loss of Innocence, Domestic Violence. Wedding crashing.

Word Count: 9k

Author Notes: This story has been published in the past on Tumblr on my old account @milknhonies-old-account since I have created a newer account and I am reposting it here.

11:35pm Monday 28th April 1890, 221B Baker Street, Marylebone, Westminster, London, England.

“You know Sherlock, matrimony is not as wicked and cruel as you might believe,” said his companion one day beside the fireplace of their flat.

The detective was slumped in his chaise playing away at his violin obnoxiously. The terrible tune of Frère Jacques made the doctor wince as it hit his ears sharply. Sherlock Holmes had found himself in a mental state of his own man made dramatics...

“Et tu Watson?” Sherlock sighed and put the violin down before wiping a hand over his face, “My dear doctor, I have no desire to restrain myself to the shackles and torture you inflict onto yourself.” He rose to his feet with a lengthy groan and sat his instrument aside. The depressed sir stumbled over a pile of discarded books to get to the drinks trolley.

The wine bottle cork popped loudly as he tugged you open.

It was no mystery. Sherlock did not entirely approve of Mary Watson purely out of jealous spite influenced by the attentions of his friend. When the pair married Sherlock stood stiff and tight lipped. He reluctantly handed over the ring as John’s Bestman.

Over the engagement and even during the marriage, Sherlock did not cease his sly childish comments made from time to time.

John however had caught his wife in conversation and debate on numerous occasions with the detective. Mrs Watson and Mr Holmes were not friends by any means, but they tolerated each other under limited circumstances. They found smart enjoyment in each other.

The doctor had come to visit his friend under the revered request of the older Holmes brother...Mycroft. There was finally an expectation...Mycroft wanted Sherlock to make a male Holmes heir...Perhaps it was scandalous rumour but John wondered how true the gossip of the older brother was; being a pillow biter or an infertile gentleman...especially with the pressure to have Sherlock marry and procreate.

Sherlock poured himself a glass of wine and downed it quickly. He set the glass on the mantle and shook his head slowly.

John tried to smile, “Mary and I have fun.”

Sherlock scoffed jealousy.

John had been married and moved out of Baker Street for six months now. Sherlock dared not ask the condition of Mary’s pregnancy.

“What fun? With your lace doilies and Shepard’s pie?”

His friend smirked, “I enjoy Mary’s pie very much, Sherlock...” He pursed is lips and tapped his cane to the floor, “Perhaps you need a slice of your own?”

Sherlock glanced at his friend. He narrowed his eyes as he returned back to the chaise, careful to not trip again on the books and loose papers that laid across the floor.

“My own pie?” Sherlock crooned as he laid back into the cusions, “Why do I get the sense that we are not speaking that of a pastry?”

The doctor tilted his head and cleared his throat, staring off into the fire, “Mrs Hudson has confided in me that you’ve resorted to returning here with...friends from Mayfair Row of the fairer sex.”

Sherlock rolled his eyes. The old hag of a landlady needed to keep her nose out of his business. He was making his rent on time, it shouldn’t matter who he kept his business with.

The detective groaned and rubbed his eyes, “Merely cases, dear John.”

The doctor bristled, “Do not lie to me Sherlock,” he waved his finger, “I know very well what you do with those women...it’s only a matter of time you ask me to check your pecker. God knows what they carry.”

Sherlock shrugged and sniffed loudly.

“For goodness sake man...” John scolded, “Have you no heart whatsoever then for the dear girl you are to marry?”

The detective rubbed his hands and laced his fingers, “Why should I?”

“Sherlock!” his friend hissed, “Have you not even considered the notion she might also resent the concept of matrimony as much as you?”

“Is that possible in women?” Sherlock quirked, “Good Scot! I sound like my brother.”

“Your own sister is still dragging her feet through her engagement to the Tewkesbury boy on what...a year almost now?” the doctor tapped his cane on the floor thoughtfully.

Sherlock huffed, “Enola is not a woman.”

In the eyes of the law she was...she needed only pick a wedding date and commit to it.

Sherlock wouldn’t have the luxury of a long engagement. The wedding was next week and he had quickly agreed to the contract. He would marry under the financial clutch of his brother...Mycroft threatened to cut off all entire bank in regards to Sherlock’s unpaid drug debts...

After the cold leads to the trail of Madame Moriarty...the detective found little sleep in the night...Sherlock befell the unfortunate antidote of cocaine to help him stay awake and opiates to keep him asleep...John loyally helped those sweating events and threatened to put him in an institute if he didn’t cease his regular consumption.

Perhaps, John wondered, Mycroft was intending to cease the draining of his pocket by using a wife to tame Sherlock’s spending habits. John decided then and there that Mycroft truly was an idiot.

“You’ve not told me her name...” the doctor said in the long silence.

Sherlock looked at his feet and sighed, “Y/N...her name is Miss Y/N Y/L/N.”

The surname was familiar to the doctor, however not personally.

John nodded gradually and scratched his moustache, “Mrs Y/N Holmes of Baker Street...it’s got a little ring to it. A simple lift to the breath don’t you think?” he mused.

The other man glared at him, he didn’t like John making fun of the situation he’d been coerced into.

He deflected, licking his lips, “Mary has grown fat.”

John cackled at the poor insult, “Swollen with my child. I’m glad you have finally noticed. I look forward to seeing your future wife just as ‘fat’ one day too.”

“Please John, my ingestion!” Sherlock shuddered, cupping his lips.

The cane tapped again at the floor, “Surely she isn’t so unsightly?” his friend asked.

“She is most plain,” Sherlock complained, before he peeled through the papers at his feet and held up a board of hard card to his friend, “Here...my brother thought it kind to send me a portrait, to invoke my eagerness, but as is clear...my mind is not swayed.”

John took the photo carefully and moved his spectacles from his pocket to his face, he gazed upon your printed face in the glow of the warm orange fire.

The doctor raised a brow and snorted, “This girl? Sherlock...I believe your disregard to the union prevents you from seeing her true potential. I think you will make fine and handsome children.”

Sherlock looked on to the fire and continued to shake his head stubbornly, “I need a case Watson...not a wife...”

The doctor felt his resolve failing, he donned his hat and scarf, “Perhaps she is your next case...after all why would anyone agree to marry you?” he stood and left Sherlock to ponder until the embers of the fireplace burnt out black and the last light of the room was succeeded by the wretched dawn.

09:00am Monday 5th May 1890 Saint Marylebone Parish Church, London, England.

A lengthy breath escaped your chest as your fingers pinched your pearly white gloves.

Twenty was a scary age...you walked a line of spinsterhood.

This was it...

You were lucky to be here. Lucky to have this offering...the circumstances were complicated. You were illegitimate but nonetheless still cared for by your father’s parents. They pitied you and your past. Good Christians with empathetic hearts, they chose to raise you when your father abandoned you for a wife who despised the concept of living beneath he same roof as her husband’s bastard.

You were grateful and honest and polite and strived to please your paternal grandparents. When they presented to you a engagement contract, you dared not waste or drain any more of their kind financial generosity.

You were amazed by the name also on the document...

You were being asked to marry The Sherlock Holmes, London’s notorious detective.

You were stunned. You accepted.

His brother, the dealer of the contract was a friend of your grandfather and had been the proposer of the deal. The two men seemed to always sit together in parliament house.

You hadn’t even met your husband to be...today during the ceremony would be the very first time.

As your grandmother fixed your veil in the carriage ride to the church, you caressed the front of the bible in your lap. You prayed to God this marriage was right and meant to be.

“You are not as pretty as my daughter’s, but as our ward after all these years I am sure you will be a suitable bride to Mr Holmes,” she muttered under her breath.

Her husband happily scolded, “Nonsense! Our granddaughter will be a perfect match to the greatest detective of London.”

He leant beside you and pinched your nose under the veil, “My little girl is the prettiest princess today,” his fingers laced with yours and kissed the back of your gloves hand with his silver beard covered lips.

“Thankyou grandfather.”

The corner of your lips jerked up. He was the warmer of the two...but it was confided that your grandmother who sat sullen faced in front of you was merely putting in a facade. Your grandfather told you early at breakfast that your grandmother wept last night, sad to see you off to be a true married woman of society.

The accomplished their task, raising a young lady of good standing and half decent breeding.

The carriage came to a screeching halt.

The cold breeze hit your face as your grandparents climbed out of the carriage door. Your delicate gloves fingers reached out and were supported by your grandfather.

You passed your bible to your grandmother who exchanged them for a modest bouquet of flowers and lace.

The chapel was massive but you knew there would be only a small audience.

Your feet climbed the stairs and patiently waited for your escort. Your grandfather’s wobbly knees had to rely on you and his walking cane. Your grandmother climbed behind him to insure he didn’t fall and hurt himself or drag you down too.

The wooden church doors were open a jar.

The whistling wind made you feel like you were entering a funeral rather your own wedding. You were not opposed to matrimony but the dead silence and stares at the front of the pews made you blood feel cold...

A gentleman you knew as Mycroft Holmes was sitting in the front pew and rose to attention as you were entering.

There was three other men standing at the edge of the room.

The priest, and the groom and his best man.

Your husband to be was handsome from the distance you could see if him. His lips remained stern in a flat line however and his brows appeared knitted, perhaps he was...displeased?

Sherlock Holmes was accompanied by his infamous companion...Doctor John Watson. A war veteran.

A woman you had never met was mirroring his position to the left side of the church, your chosen maid of honour...but as she turned the slight curve of her belly spoke out... pregnant. A matron of honour.

Your grandfather clenched your arm and kissed the side of your head. You began your steady approach down the island with your grandmother now leading in front to find her seating on the front left pew.

You tried to not share too directly at your future husband’s frown. Perhaps he was tired or not aware he was frowning at all and just deep in his thoughts.

You passed your bouquet to your matron of honour.

Your arms felt shaky, this was it...a lifelong commitment ceremony.

When you paused before the alter, the priest bowed his head and asked your grandfather, “Do you giveth this woman to be married to this man?”

He gruffly cleared his throat “I do,” and turned you to face him, his hands squeezed your arms gently before he carefully lifted your veil above your face and over your flower covered hair. He smiled softly, tears beaded in the corner of his eyes. He leant closer and kissed your cheek, in your ear he whispered gently, “God bless my darling girl.”

Sherlock was quickly removing his white glove and pocketing it in his inner breast side blazer.

Your grandfather turned you around to face the priest. He placed your right hand into the holy man’s who then carefully removed the glove you wore and passed your naked fingers into the warm clammy hands of Sherlock Holmes. His reaction to your bare face was out of surprise...you did not know if his wide dark blue eyes were a good sign or not.

The priest tied a small white ribbon around your wrists, connecting you and Sherlock in symbolism.

He turned back and floated up to the stairs of his stand. He opened his holy book and said out to the very small group witnessing, “Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this congregation, to join together this man...and this woman in holy matrimony.”

You felt your throat tighten and your mouth dry as Sherlock’s thumb softly rubbed the back of your hand. Your eyes glanced over to his face...his frown had disappeared, he was wearing the smallest of smiles. Relief swept through you, he was happy for now and that is all you cared for.

As the priest continued his holy speech on the reason of marriage you thought about your duties as a wife. You would now look after your husband as you have cared for your grandfather. You would bring forth a hot meal for dinner and host luncheons with other married couples of society. You would rub his sore feet and shoulders and prepare him a bath when he required it after his days of long tiring work. And most importantly...you would lay back and take him within to create children. You would spend the rest of your life expected to make your husband feel appreciated and loved. You were to be his other half, his Eve to his Adam.

He had the important duty of caring for you financially and supporting your future children and their education.

If he was a detective you knew his intelligence meant you would make very brilliant minded babes. You would make society proud.

You had seen Sherlock face in the papers but they were of illustrations that did not capture the colour and humanism of himself

“-Into which holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined,” the priest softly finished.

You felt Sherlock sigh and when his thumb stopped rubbing your hand, you tried to return the same rubbing onto his fingers.

It was a silent language of greeting and comfort...

‘hello, how do you do?’

‘I am well, thankyou.’

“Therefore, if any man can show any just cause, why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter for ever hold his peace.”

The groom glanced over his shoulder and his lips appeared to tighten...they fell into a frown and his hand grip loosened...was he...your heart deflated...was he not wanting to marry you?

You tried to restrain your emotions.

The priest peered down at you both, “Kneel.”

Sherlock and you with your hands still touching and bound slowly bend to your knees before the altar. The holy man pulled out a bowl and pinched his hands into the holy water.

He flicked both of your faces as he spoke, “I require and charge you both, as ye will answer at the dreadful day of judgment when the secrets of all hearts shall be disclosed, that if either of you know any impediment, why ye may not be lawfully joined together in Matrimony, ye do now confess it. For be ye well assured, that so many as are coupled together otherwise than God’s Word doth allow are not joined together by God; neither is their Matrimony lawful...”

There was no way you could mention how you were concerned Sherlock’s reaction might’ve been worldly. He remained silent to.

Your grandmother once told you how people who marry often do not love each other until years later. It happened to her, so you had within your heart the trust that as long as you put in the effort to be the perfect wife, Sherlock would eventually grow his love for you.

The Priest smiled at you both and nodded his head,

“William Sherlock Scott Holmes wilt thou have this woman Y/N Y/L/N to thy wedded Wife, to live together after God’s ordinance in the holy estate of matrimony?”

Your eyes glanced to his face, he appeared, flushed.

“Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honour, and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?”

Your groom looked over your hands and then glanced up at your face, his throat bobbed, “I will.”

His thumb rubbed your hand again.

You tried to smile...it was hard when he didn’t appear as enthusiastic about the union as you had hoped. It reminded you this was really just a contract between his brother and your grandfather.

“Y/N Y/L/N wilt thou have this William Sherlock Scott Holmes to thy wedded Husband, to live together after God’s ordinance in the holy estate of matrimony?”

Your eyes stared up at the Priest who was dictating the vow, “Wilt thou obey him, and serve him, love, honour, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?”

Your voice for a moment caught in your throat. You looked to the floor and nodded, “I will.”

The priest then stood away and proclaimed, “Now ye have proclaimed to god, now tis time you proclaim your vows to yourselves.”

You felt Sherlock tighten his grip and faced him still kneeling beside him, his voice wavered as he proclaimed, “I, William Sherlock Scott Holmes, take thee Y/N Y/L/N to my wedded Wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth.”

A pause in the air reminded you it was now your turn to repeat the solemn vow.

And for a split second...you wondered if agreeing would be a sin to god...you would do this all...but love...could you love a man who you did not know, honour a man who may not love you?

You nodded and properly looked into his eyes, trying to vow earnestly.

“I Y/N Y/L/N take thee William Sherlock Scott Holmes to my wedded Husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, cherish, and to obey, till death us do part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I give thee my troth.”

He glanced away and his lips parted, it was if he wanted to say something to you...before he closed them and eyed the priest. Ah yes...you were still in a holy ceremony. Talking could come later.

The priest nodded to you both and gestured to your hands.

“Now the groomsmen may please administer the ring.”

Sherlock removed his other glove.

The man who stood behind him, John, stood carefully forward after stealing a small ring from his breast pocket and passed it to Sherlock.

The priest untied your hands and your groom delicately took your left hand. He removed your other glove and pocketed it.

“With this ring I thee wed,” He pinched your forth finger before sliding the cold golden band on, it felt slightly loose, “With my body I thee worship.”

You finally took the time to actually look at his full face as he vowed to you. His blue eyes were dark and sparkling like a night sky or a ravenous stormy sea. In the corner of his right eye was a fleck of brown...oh yes...the stony sea side by the waters, they were his solemn eyes covered by curtains of thick dark lashes.

“And with all my worldly goods I thee endow,” he trailed off softly.

His lips were thin, wet and soft...his skin flushed in a soft pink but not overly obvious, his neck was a shade lighter to his ears and cheeks.

You heard the distant hum of the priest standing above you both.

The groom cleared his throat, “In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.”

The priest clapped his hands and joyously announced, “For as much as William Sherlock Scott Holmes and Y/N Y/L/N have consented together in holy Wedlock, and have witnessed the same before God and this company, and thereto have given and pledged their troth either to other, and have declared the same by giving and receiving of a Ring, and by joining of hands; I pronounce that they be man and wife together, rise now as Mr and Mrs Holmes. In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.”

Everyone in the church echoed the everlasting word...“Amen.”

Sherlock and you rose steadily back to your feet. He let go of your fingers. Your hands limply fell aside. You turned back to your grandparents and smiled.

You were now a married woman before God.

The holy man brought around the script of lawfully paper to sign your name and the names of your witnesses. The parchment was laid across a small serving table where there was a small ink well and pen waiting.

Out of necessity you went to the table first.

When you signed your maiden name and then scripted out your new surname, you were now under the law of man the wife of the British detective. Your eyes fluttered shut...it was done...you were no longer considered the poor bastardess soul that had been disowned by both parents...you were now The Mrs Holmes. Wife and a future mother of Holmes sons and daughters.

Your matron of honour came closer to your side and politely smiled, “Mary Watson, my husband is the groomsmen. You are most beautiful and I must demand Sherlock cherishes you rightfully.”

She was a beautiful. Her gown at a light blue cooled her wild complexion. With her blonde hair and rosy pink cheeks, she glowed in her motherly state.

You returned the grin, “A pleasure Mrs Watson, thankyou for being here on this special day.”

She leant across you and signed the paper before laying her hands on your shoulders thoughtfully. You looked over your shoulder at the man who was now your husband.

He was shaking hands among the male participants. He was smiling. Your souls felt relieved. When he looked at you, the was something strange...he looked you entirely up and down... His face dropped, back to his deep thoughts.

He bowed his head to you before he brushed passed you leant over the certificate to officiate his name, however before the pen could meet the paper there was a persistent cry.

“I object!” Screamed this mousy tone that echoed the chapel walls, “Sherlock! I am sorry I am late! Stop! Stop the wedding!”

The sound of running feet screeched along the stone floor.

Everyone’s face split into shock as a boy who was a little younger than you for appearance sake came racing down the pews.

Yet as the boy ran closer, you could see the hat fall of his head and a wave of beautiful brown locks flowed down their back...her back...it was a girl in dirty boys clothes. She looked a kin to a chimney sweep with the amount of spot over her face and her hands and shirt.

“Please!” she heaved onto her knees to catch her breath, “Do not continue!” she raised her filthy palms in praying pleas to the priest.

“What is the meaning of this!?” your grandfather said losing his temper at the foul interruption of a seemingly happy union.

“Enola!” the two Holmes brothers shouted in union. They looked to each other accusingly before looking back at the girl.

The young woman glanced between you and Sherlock and started shaking her head.

“Enola,” Mycroft hissed and grabbed the girls arm roughly, shaking her slightly, “look at the state of you! What is the meaning of this? You were not permitted to attend and yet you come here uninvited nonetheless!?”

You were frightful of the way Mycroft shouted at her and brutally shook her. The young woman appeared scattered, she looked at you and then to Sherlock again.

“You were too late Enola,” your husband frustratingly sighed, “Mycroft let her go, this is my fault.”

Too late...wait....what...

You were stunned...speechless and confused...

Did Sherlock...have another love? Did this young creature hold his affections?

Mycroft loosened his grip. She sprung away from the older Holmes, “You are married, perhaps before God who I know you don’t care for!” And dashed passed you and waved the certificate with only your name on the paper.

“What blasphemy is this?” your Grandmother now announced with annoyance.

“But see?” The young woman named Enola ignored her and ran up to Sherlock, “Your name is not here, so legally you are not married Sherlock, you can stop this!”

His nose flared and his face darkened to pink. You could hear how his knuckles cracked as he made them into fists. He was furious. His angry eyes flashed at you and back at the girls.

You felt stunted...this girl was right...

Your chest deflated...you were not married, no, you were still in fact Y/N Y/L/N the bastard daughter of a Lord who was not permitted the privileged respect of your legitimate cousins and siblings. You were not a honourable woman still...you were still covered and stained with your parents sins.

The comforting hand of Mary Watson touched your hand. You started trembling.

Your heart ached. Your hopes to be veiled in a honouring title as a wife were diminishing by the second.

“I can help pay off your debts when I marry,” she quickly spurted, “Do not let Mycroft rule over you like he has done all these years! Do not marry a woman you clearly do not love Sherloc-”

“Enola!”

You gasped. You jumped as his voice bellowed and boomed through your ears and throughout the stone walls of the church. This dramatic scene was incredibly unorthodox and the priest himself seemed amiss and confused on how to handle the audience of the church.

“Enough!” Sherlock angrily hissed and shook his head.

He tore the paper from her hands and slammed it down on the priests stand before gracelessly signing his name.

“There!” he spat and slapped the paper against the priests chest, “It is done!”

He proceeded to storm out of the church leaving you and the rest of those in attendance in shock. “Sherlock! Wait!” Mrs Watsons husband shouted as he gathered his hat, coat and cane from a pew and hobbled out hurriedly after him.

Your chest tightened...you felt a rush of air escape you. You felt rather like your entire body had been spun around too many times. The embarrassment you felt before the audience was horrible. Tears were watering up into your eyes.

You felt abandoned.

It was quite obvious to you and everyone in the church...

Sherlock Holmes did not want to marry you. Why were you so unlovable?

You felt your legs grow wobbly. Carefully with the kind support of Mrs Watson you sat down in a pew.

Your grandmother did not look at you. She stared at the cross hanging above the ceiling and sighed. Her wrinkled lips turned downward. She did not approve of your behave or his.

This wedding was a distasteful event.

Your grandfather was shaking and needed to also sit down. The priest and Mycroft helped him to the opposite pew chairs. His hand was strictly clenching his chest.

And everyone but yourself was glaring at the young girl in boys clothes...

“Enola,” your matron of honour mumbled, “I think it best you leave until you are ready to apologise to your brothers wife...”

Your breath hitched and you gasped out of shock.

So she was not a old girlfriend romantically begging for love from your now husband...no instead the name came ringing through your ear. Enola Holmes...of course...the less experienced Holmes detective...

You dared not speak. You knew your tongue might be venomous and hot as a flame. You were in shock and a state of silent rage and sadness. You could’ve slapped the stupid looking girl whose face was full of surprise and regret.

You weren’t entirely sure how to express yourself. You felt humiliated and rejected. All those years of silence and a straight face after what your father had said to you...it broke you...

Your own husband did not want you. We’re you that much unlovable? We’re you cursed to feel this way?

Your grandfather was the only man in your life left that you felt honest adoration from...and his time was coming soon to an end in his old age.

You muffled your sobs into you gloves as you heard Enola run out of the church.

It was your brother in law who then came to kneel before you and hold out to you a handkerchief, “My sincerest apologies dear sister. I dared not think Sherlock or my sister could be so wicked a pair until now. All I can beg is you accept your role and keep your sweet countenance.”

You wondered suddenly why he was not the brother you married instead. Before you focused on such a thing you remembered that lusting for another man, your husband’s brother, was a grave mortal sin and incredibly improper before a holy priest.

Taking the cloth you sighed and covered your face, “Th-thankyou Mr Holmes, I do hope to make your brother very...” you croaked and tried not to break into tears again, to avoid them you swallowed hard, “very happy.”

You took a cool deep breath and forced a smile onto your lips. It hurt. Your cheeks stretched and painfully ticked.

He nodded and smiled, “I am sure you will my dear, I am sure you will, allow me the opportunity to escort you to your cab, your grandfather...”

You both looked at the older man whose anger had made him out of breath, “is still unwell.”

You said your subtle goodbyes. You kissed your grandfather’s balding scalp and scratching softly at his beard. He kissed the inside of your palm. His eyes watered, he didn’t want this for you. He looked down with shame.

In your eyes now you understood be would be the last man to have ever loved you.

Nodding you accepted his arm and thus concluded the wedding...

11:23am Monday 5th May 1890, 221 Baker Street, Marylebone, Westminster, London, England.

Mycroft had hailed you a cab as your husband so nobly left into the one that had been rented for the both of you.

Your brother in law loaded you inside and had said he would look after your grandparents to make sure they got back to their own home safe and soundly.

You closer the curtain to the window and let your heart sob.

A sad bride on her wedding day, how terribly melancholy and cliché....

You didn’t expect romantic puppy dog love found in frivolous novellas, however you never expected such humiliation and horror to strike you on such an important date. This would be something you’d never forget...

The abandonment of another person in your life.

You were in a state of utter distress. You clenched your skirts tightly beneath your fingers. Yoh violently tore at your veil and the pins in your hair that held the specific style.

As the carriage cam to a halt the driver called out your destination, you pulled the curtain back and looked at the street.

221 Baker Street...your new home.

You opened and slid out of the carriage by yourself. You lifted your skirts, avoiding the black mud that your shoes squished into.

You climbed the front stairs of the building gradually and knocked at the door.

You waited five minutes before resorting to desperately banging. The horse cab had taken off and there was no going back.

What you desired most was a chance to sit down again and collect yourself before you sobbed hysterically on the street in the public eye. You already held the strange case of some being still clad in your white wedding gown.

When the door finally creaked open you fought every bone in your body not to storm your way through inside.

A wrinkle hand pushed the door open, followed by a steady voice of an older woman, “Why, hello my dear!” she said, “You must be the new Mrs Holmes then?”

A woman with wide eyes too close together with glasses and a loud clattering chatelaine on her waist opened the way to you.

Her hand launched out and tugged you inside by your wrist.

“Come, come in, please!”

You let her pull you inside the building and shut the door behind you.

As she locked the front door she spun to welcome you in an unexpected hug.

You normally would be shocked by such impropriety of embracing a stranger so quickly. But in your state of distress you leant closer into her arms and sniffled.

She pulled away, “My dear,” she gasped, “It is your wedding day, why the tears?” Your wet eyes went round and round as she jittered about you, admiring your dress and pinching at the soft material. “I did not expect you to arrive here so early. Oh and where are my manners! I’m Mrs Hudson dearest, I am your land lady and housekeeper.”

You fiddled with the ring now solid on your finger. You bowed softly to her, “My name is Y/N I don’t expect you to call me Mrs Holmes, Mrs Hudson, please call me as you will be my name,” you mumbled and wiped your eyes. They were pink and puffy.

She clicked her tongue with dismay.

“I presume Sherlock has brought you to this state...” The elderly woman smiled sadly, her wrinkles spread out, she took your arm and led you up a flight of stairs.

“Darling, I am just happy you are here. Your husband can be such a bully sometimes, but don’t tell him I said so. Your belongings arrived early this morning and I was just finishing putting your belonging away in your room.”

“Mrs Hudson,” you whimpered, “thankyou greatly for I have had a trying day...”

She gave you a copy of the home key to the 221B door.

Inside you were received with a scent of ink and tobacco. A very masculine smell. Clearly this was the home of your husband.

“Sherlock can be quite the messy tenant so I pray you will be fast enough to clean up after him,” Mrs Hudson stated bluntly.

“He has all his things thrown around the apartment and his excuse is always it has been done for a bloody case,” she made a high pitch sound and quickly covered her lips, “Forgive me dear, I don’t usually swear.”

You smiled sweetly and sighed, “Do not ask that of me Mrs Hudson,” you shook your head. Your grandfather had a terrible habit of doing many deeds and saying many things unfit for the ears of a lady.

She sighed with relief and clapped her hands. By taking your arm once more, she guided you through the homestead and presented you the premises.

Here there was a fireplace in the living room, nearby a bathtub had been carried from one of the bedrooms, it’s linens already prepared and laid over the copper surface. A fresh bucket of coal and wood sat beside the fireplace layout. The floor covered in a fine carpet and the curtains were the thickest of velvet.

“Kitchen is down stairs, shared by us both dear but I supply most meals as is the tenancy agreement so you needn’t burden yourself with those tasks, I do ask you wash your own linens. We have a alley line out the windows.”

You nodded as the woman kindly spoke to you and introduced you to your new life.

It was when you passed two doors you realised there was two bedrooms.

“Sherlock is sometimes a overly private person. Especially to the contents of his cases and clients. He owns the only key to his bedroom so I’m afraid I cannot show you his room until he arrives. This one, where Doctor Watson once resided is now yours.”

You opened it up and noted the empty trunks around the room which Mrs Hudson had emptied earlier.

“Doctor Watson lived here?” you asked over your shoulder as you stepped into the quarters.

You visually took in the fine canopy bed and a small desk and wardrobe in the corner with a large window that led out to the alley wash line, a balcony area and stair case up to the roof above.

Mrs Hudson went around and closed the suitcases and trunks gently, one by one. You started to explore which drawers she had placed what undergarments and jackets and what dresses had been hung in the wardrobe and which books she had stacked onto your desk and where she placed your accessories on your vanity.

You were not surprised by the condition of a separate sleeping quarter. Your grandparents slept in separate rooms...but that was because your grandfather was a loud snorer and suffered from nightmares of his time in the wars.

This marriage, you worried, would also lack a lot of physical contact...

“I am going to carry these empty trunks up to the attic dear,” Mrs Hudson stated as she lifted the empty wooden boxes. Your eyes widened and before you could offer assistance she had moved spritely out.

You opened the window to your room, allowing light into the space. You sneezed. It seemed the particles in the light showed Mrs Hudson forgot to dust the area.

You opened the small doors. The noise of the outdoor city crept in. The smell of the salty mud in the street tickled your nose.

Intrigued to enjoy more of your space you came out to look more around your home. It was smaller than what you came from, that did not make you any less grateful. This would be better than living in the gutter of the slums, you were sure.

The idea you now had a home of your very own where you could independently invite people over for tea and luncheon was exciting, your husband be damned if he didn’t allow.

12:07pm Monday 5th May 1890, 221 Baker Street, Marylebone, Westminster, London, England.

When Mrs Hudson returned after removing the last suitcase and storage box, you politely requested she help you out of your wedding dress...

Her grey eyes widened at your request, “Did you not wish to await Sherlock’s return my dear? Traditionally the husband loves to take of this gown of all gowns.”

After his actions today...you were not sure you wanted to please him or suffer his very untraditional behaviour. You doubt he would be kind or patient enough to unbutton the line down your back.

You shook your head, “Thankyou for your suggestion Mrs Hudson, but my mind remains solid, I wish to resort to a dressing gown. I don’t intend to welcome any guests today other than yourself and my husband.”

Not willing to question your choice, she smiled warmly, “Alrighty dear, turn around then.”

Her wrinkly fingers pinched at your spine line of buttons starting from your neck downward.

“Forgive my prying dear...may I ask how the service went? I had expected you and Mr Holmes to have arrived together.”

You sighed and pinch the bridge of your nose. The moment you arrived you sensed this line of questioning would eventually occur...

“It was sorely interrupted by my sister in law...I believe she was attempting to save her brother from the wails of...” you smirked, and sarcastically drawled, “wedded bliss...”

You could hear the old woman cackle behind you, “Ah that Enola Holmes is a trouble maker and their mother if I might say so myself.”

“I did not witness his mother at the ceremony?” you noted openly, you presumed their parents had passed away.

“Oh no, probably not. Eudoria like a ghost in the walls some days. Very secretive that woman but good company I assure you, a comedian.”

How unusual to state so openly their mother was a trouble maker and yet good company...was such a thing possible?

“She...Enola...revealed his...true desires...or lack of...to be my husband...he left the chapel in a great frustration.”

Mrs Hudson’s worrisome tone opened out to you, “Oh no my dear, I am sorry to hear such a thing...I did say earlier some days he can be bully so I must pray he doesn’t treat you like that furthermore.”

You nodded sharply, “Perhaps my husband needs a bigger bully to tame his actions. Maybe he needs a good humbling?” you snorted a laugh. You felt a sudden pause in Mrs Hudson. You sensed her stepping away. Her sudden silence disturbed you

You looked over your shoulder to observe her but what came in view was a elderly woman gaping at a hard face man at the front door...Sherlock.

“Mrs Hudson, I do not believe it is a duty of yours to undress my bride and so I must find myself saying, I forbid you to touch her so intimately again,” he quipped as he shed his blazer and hung his top hat on the coat rack.

The room had become cold despite the bright sun shining into the apartment.

You felt exposed with your back flared out.

You turned your body for your front to face him.

The housekeeper snorted, “If you hadn’t abandoned her in the chapel this morning perhaps you would’ve been here to do it yourself.”

Your jaw fell open at her boldness. The man grimaced and smiled tightly with fire in his eyes, “Mrs Hudson?” he asked sweetly, “Get out of my apartment. Now.”

It was scary and yet so calm as he said it. His tone was full of a unspoken threat. The elder woman jerked up her chin and nudged him as she left the main room.

Sherlock swiftly locked the door behind her.

“So...Mrs Holmes...” He muttered bitterly, “You appear to be in need of a hand there with your wedding dress. Come here...wife...so I may relieve you of your strains.”

He spat the word ‘wife’ through gritted teeth. You did not feel safe...

“I...I’m sorry for what I said,” you mumbled, looking away from him as he stepped slowly closer to you.

He looked at you with a harsh face. His finger twirled in the air...silently demanding you turn.

He might as well have slapped you with the way you gasped. You bit your lip tightly to not cry now in front of him again. You turned away from him and began to pull down the bodice of your gown.

“Do not be,” he scoffed lightly, “You were merely stating what lay in your mind...”

You felt him behind you, hovering over you. You felt his fingers dug into the strings of your corset.

You pushed the bodice down to your hips. You untied the string of your bustle. When the springy cage collapsed, your white skirts fell passed your hips and down to your ankles.

“To this day,” Sherlock hummed, “I seek when women return to the corseting stays of only their chest. I don’t like pulling all these strings loose.”

You nodded slowly. You wanted to not disagree with him or voice your opinion. You had made the mood direly cold and you felt it was your duty to make him happy once again.

You stood from foot to foot nervously, “I had the means to merely shred my dress and not my underlings, you needn’t remove my corset-”

He cut you off blunt and brashly, “I want to see my wife naked and I need to pull these strings before I lose patience and cut them off, so please stay still.”

“Naked?” you gasped as he tugged roughly, making the whale bone loosen further around your waist and hips. You lost your balance and fell forward onto the lounge.

He twirled you around to face him, “Yes, naked,” and pushed the corset up and over your head. You felt suddenly like a trapped animal on the cushion lounge. The chemise was light and sheer...it did little to hide your breasts....

He got to his knees in front of you and started to unbutton your shoes.

“You know how to perform your wifely duties yes? You do not require an anatomy lesson I hope? A woman of sublime education should know how one copulates with another.”

You clenched your thighs tightly together, tol afraid to move as he stared up at you. Very tiny movement of your nodding made him hum approvingly.

You were feeling hot...sweat beading at the back of your neck. You were not sure whether you were ready to have him so carnally especially in the middle of the day. You were unsure if this was appropriate to be doing at all.

As he removed both your shoes...his hands tenderly pulled at your white stockings....his hands creeped up your legs and pulled at the ribbon garters... Your bare feet felt cold to the air.

You jumped as the feeling of his lips pressed to one of your knees.

It was the first kiss he ever gave you.

His hands were wayward and you frigidly laid still. You were still too scared to move. His hands cupped your covered breasts softly.

The breath in your chest was quickly stolen out in a gasp and a unpreventable shaking moan.

His face rose up and his nose nuzzled to yours. It was so intimate and sudden...you were frightened and turned your face away to shudder...

“W-wait,” you softly begged.

He pulled back and huffed, “Yes, you’re corrct, I am overly dressed as well it would seem.”

He pushed up to his feet and plucked at the buttons of his vest. His finger unkindly tore his cravat from his throat and thumbed down his trouser lifting suspenders.

You felt your knees rise up to your chest. You were unsure if he wanted you to help, if that was a part of the duties of the bedroom....you were still not in the bedroom however...

“I believe this copulation would be easier in the bedroom, my dear Mrs Holmes?”

You didn’t understand straight away what he meant...you were frazzled...surely men who hated their wives didn’t do this? Had you pleased him so quickly that he didn’t care about whatever you’d don’t to frustrate him?

He looked at you dumbly and tilted his head, glancing to your bedroom door.

His hand held out to you, “Shall we?”

Your mouth felt impossibly dry but your loins grew a buzz and you felt a need to self pleasure...was this lust allowed in a marriage bed?

You carefully rose to your feet.

He pulled you closer and closer to your room and finally closer to your own bed.

He gently pushed your shoulders down for you to sit on the soft mattress

He removed his shoes and pushed down his loose trousers. His breeches, he started to unbutton. You looked away from his face and up to the ceiling.

You heard his breeches hit the floor. You didn’t want to look at his intimates... He shed his shirt and started to pinch at your chemise.

“Lift your arms up.”

From the corner of your eyes you could see his bare chest.

You were trembling with your limbs above your head. You didn’t know this man...he was Sherlock Holmes the great detective but that is all you knew.

And you were letting him see you in a state of your most open self...

He pulled the material over your head and he groaned as he gazed at your totally nude chest. Your nipples hardened in the cold breeze wharfing through the open window. Your arms fell to quickly cover your chest, you were too cold and shy to be so exposed like this to him.

He noticed your shivering. He turned away and went to close the window and shut the curtains. With strange admiration you noticed his tight and strong backside and thighs.

You flushed and accidentally whimpered when he turned around and you saw his cock. It wasnt like the statues in the museum...nor the medical books you perused..

It was...larger, and brutish.

You bit your lip and clenched your thighs again.

Would be hurt you? You were curious as a young girl about sex like many. Among your friends you had heard that the larger the male member the more agonising coitus would be.

You quickly recalled a time as a girl your grandfather took you to a horse auction and a stallion had broken his way into the mares pen. The great black beast look the white squealing mare most violently.

Would Sherlock pin his body above yours and bite the back of your neck to keep you beneath him...

You gulped loud enough for him to hear.

His hand pushed your shoulders back slowly.

“Spread those pretty thighs Mrs Holmes, show me what is now mine...”

Your fingers dug into your arms as you held yourself. Pathetically, tears came creeping out the button ducts of your orbs and escaped down your cheeks.

You swallowed the sob building in your chest. You didn’t think this intimacy would be so frightful and terrorising...

He stared down at you with a mean smirk. He scoffed and shook his head. He touched your knees and helped force them apart. Your spread thighs revealed your hairy centre at the crease of your drawers crotch...

He hummed approvingly. He stuck two fingers into his mouth and sucked them loudly and lewdly...

You choked on your tears and covered your face with your hands unable to watch anymore...you felt everything nonetheless...

Those fingers trailed across your thigh and tapped at your peaking labia. Your eyes felt wide.

A light shriek jumped from your throat as his hot mouth latched to your neck and you gasped while his tongue tickled your flesh.

You felt a single finger wiggled its way around your pearl bundle of pleasure before trailing and prodding into the space of your body...the hole. Your vaginal entrance...

“A hairy pussy cat...I might need to change that...”

You didn’t understand what filth he was suggesting. You knew your pussy referred to your entrance but to change it made no sense to you...

His free hand gently pulled your wrists away and pushed your hands to sit above your head.

With his soft mouth he wetly trailed his tongue along your skin arouse down to your fuzzy covered underarm and across to the swell of your breath. You squeezed your eyes shut with difficulty as you felt the tip of his nose nudge your teat...

His hot breath covered your nipple.

It stirred a strange, painful warm down your belly and arousal between your legs. You felt the wet essences of pleasure seep from yourself...

You shuddered loudly and groaned into the head of his curly hair as his finger pushed inside, stretching you out. You blanched at the thought remembering his thick cock was worth four of his fingers at this moment.

The sound of his finger was squelching and wet.

His second finger flickered to get inside of you. You tore away your mouth and loudly groaned as he entered and spread your insides.

Your belly felt tight. You let out a moan.

He kissed along your jaw and pushed his mouth over your lips. You didn’t know what to do. It was like he was sucking at your lips and licking them with his tongue.

You felt your experience come to light. You and on some occasions of youth touched yourself intimately in the dead of the night when all in the manor were asleep...your soft sighs muffled by your own pillows were heard only by yourself. The scratching sounds of your hips rolling against a thick blanket between your legs were maybe mistaken for a skittering rat in the walls.

You urges would decease the touches when you were reminded by your own senses that your genitals were not your prize but your future husband’s to touch. It was a sin to steal what would belong to him.

And as you laid beneath Sherlock and recalled those desperate nights of silly humping you bucked your hips into the touch of his fingers filling and stretching your way.

It was good to be a virgin...you didn’t want to be a slut ...you worried he would see you as many saw you.... Like your mother a prostitute....

You kept yourself pure for this moment but for the first time you wondered if that was a good choice. Was the lack of experience...a good thing for men?

And after sometime of him thrusting his fingers in and out, you felt the soft hot skin of something touching your hole....the tip of his cock.

“Sh-sherlock,” you worriedly whispered, “Please...w-wait.”

Your husband grunted and lifted his hand away from your hole to run his thumb across your tear wet cheek.

“You are aware it will sting...nothing has been inside you like this before.”

“Yes,” you whimpered. He kissed your wobbling mouth and used the tips of his fingers to press on your clit. He rubbed you slowly and realigned his tip to your hole.

“Allow me to open your doors with my key, wife. Fill your home with children.”

You shouted up at the ceiling as he thrust hard and fast into your body. Your lower body felt like a hot poker was ripping up into you.

You gasped and choked on a silent squeak before a few seconds past and the air filled your lungs making you scream and cry out as your life changed forever...

It was like he had cut you inside. And the pressure had not left you. His cock was dug deep and snuggly buried inside your tight hole.

You hit him. Your fists banged his chest with the little strength you had left.

“Stop! Get off me!” you wailed.

With bruising grip he held your arms down either side of your head. He was too strong for you to pull and push off. You sobbed out for your grandfather, so scared this would kill you.

His hips pulled back. You both gasped.

You groaned at the sight of his dick leaving you, covered in dark burgundy blood. It yellowed his pale member.

You felt sick and turned your head away into your covers.

“Please,” you begged, “Let me go.”

He sighed and shook his head, his mouth latched to your ear, “No...you can do this Y/N...this is the price all wives pay.”

He sheathed back inside of you. This time the burn of your walls was a little less.

The smell of metal was in the room. Your blood scent hit your nose finally. You could taste it in the back of your throat.

The way his hip bones punched down and roughly scrapped your pelvis made you hiss.

His mouth forced it’s way onto yours again in a passionate kiss. You whimpered and begged him to stop again as he thrusted inside. It hurt too much...you whined and sunk your teeth into his lips and caught the tip of his tongue.

“Fuck!” he roared and pulled back violently. His lips and yours covered in bright red blood in contrast to the red waves between your thighs.

“Get off!” you screamed again. You tugged your arms weakly. You tried pounding your heels into the back of his thighs.

He rose his hand high and you squeezed your eyes shut waiting for a blow...it did not come. You heard him yell angrily and hit the blanket instead.

He tired himself out of you, the force made you choke. The taste of his warm blood in between your teeth had you spitting aside the covers.

He pushed off the bed and stomped angrily out of the room, slamming your bedroom door shut. You sniffled and turned onto your side, crying as the burn between your legs struck you. You felt empty and sore. Like his hand had punched inside your body.

This is not at all what you anticipated as a married woman...

Why would any woman ever love their husband after cause such agony as that in their beds...

You reached out for a pillow and tugged it to your face. Your nose rubbed deep into the soft goose feathers and let your tears meld with your snot.

You curled up and clutched your sore side...

It was a pain comparable to your menses.

You prayed for help or someone like your grandfather or Mycroft to come and save you.

HELPINES:

If you are a victim of sexual abuse, assault or domestic violence or know someone who is please reach out to these links that share helpline services, phone numbers or emails. Consent and respect is important in every relationship whether between friends, family or even strangers.

Australian Helpline Services

UK Helpline Services

American Helpline Services

India Helpline Services.

[bluebirdsboi]

Where has it Gone? | Joel Miller x Male Reader

Fandom: The Last of Us

Genre: Angst | Songfic: The Innocence - Movement 10 of Craig Hella Johnson’s Choral Suite of Considering Matthew Shepard https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEA1pLCZqnk

Paring: Joel Miller x Male Reader

Warnings: Blood, Crying, Dead reader, Death scene, Drinking, Drug use

Word Count: 873

Requests are open

Key

Italic Text = Song lyrics 

** This work does not use (Y/n) **

After a full day’s worth of traveling, the sky was starting to grow dim. Joel, with both his and Ellie’s diminishing vitality, decided that it was finally time to retire for the day before the night could completely settle.

Under the shine of stars above them and surrounded by a vast greenery of trees, Ellie sat beside her companion, content after finishing the meal for the night. Striking conversation, she asked her typical questions about life before the outbreak. What Joel wasn’t prepared for was Ellie’s question about lovers. “Did you ever have a special someone?” As if on cue, Joel’s mind was flooded with memories of his late boyfriend.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

When I think of all the times the world was ours for dreaming, When I think of all the times the earth seemed like our home, Every heart alive with its own longing, Every future we could ever hope to hold.

You waited on the couch for Joel to finish seeing Sarah off to bed. Ever since you first met Joel, you got along with Sarah very well. This relationship grew to the point where you began to see her as your child the closer you grew to Joel.

Your mind drifted to thinking about what your life could be like with these two, only being broken out of your trance when Joel sat next to you. “Where’s ‘ur head at?” His rich voice rang through your ears as his arm snaked around your shoulders. “Just thinking.” Your reply was accompanied by a small, yet fond smile and a light head shake. He knew what you meant by “just thinking”. The feeling of elation that makes your heart skip beats at the thought of making new memories, but the uncertainty that shakes your core. 

Joel held you closer, planted a tender kiss on your forehead, and gently rubbed up and down on your forearm. “Don’tcha worry about a thing, handsome. We’ll watch Sarah grow up, get married one day, and jus’ live all’ happy, okay darlin’?” His accent laced his words in a way that soothed every nerve in your body. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All the times our laughter rang in summer, All the times the rivers sang our tune, Was there already sadness in the sunlight? Some stormy story waiting to be told?

You and Joel were sitting by the river you two used to visit. Sarah noticed the unspoken moment between the both of you and took it upon herself to give you two time to yourselves. 

The moment was exactly that, unspoken. A silent adoration that was communicated by actions and decorated by the scenery. Joel’s arm around your shoulders and yours around his torso. A brilliant orange tinted the sky above and reflected off of the water, the only sounds being the flowing river and a breeze blowing through the trees. 

An overwhelming sense of tranquility washed over you and Joel. As if nothing existed but the two of you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Where, O where has the innocence gone? Where, O where has it gone? Rains, rolling down, wash away my memory. Where, O where has it gone?

Joel tried to stop the images from clouding both his vision and thinking, but it was too late. The tears that welled in his eyes now rolled down his face with a shaky exhale.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I think of all the joys, the wonders we remember, All the treasures we believed we’d never ever lose,

Blood was pouring out of your open wound, its crimson hue staining your clothes. You weren’t going to make it, and both you and Joel knew that. 

Your last moments were spent attempting to comfort Joel. You lay dying in his lap with him holding you in his arms, a hand on his cheek to wipe away the never-ending stream of tears. “Honey, it’s okay. I’m going to see Sarah, and then one day we’ll all be together again.” Hearing his daughter’s name struck a chord that only served to intensify Joel’s sorrow. “No, baby boy please don’t do this to me. I can’t lose you too.” He realized that his words fell on deaf ears given your lack of response and limp body.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Too many days gone by without their meaning, Too many darkened hours without their peace.

Joel threw back another pill of Hydro, chased by nothing but the burning of whiskey sliding down his throat. His head filled with fleeting visages of the people he loved the most became too much to bear. After what felt like hours of contemplation, Joel begrudgingly dragged himself to bed knowing that his dreams will be filled with his bygone daughter and the man he loved.    

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Where, O where has the innocence gone? Where, O where has it gone?  Vows we once swore; now it’s just this letting go. Where, O where has it gone? 

Where, O where has the innocence gone? Where, O where has it gone? Rains, rolling down, wash away my memory. Where, O where has it gone?

Ellie placed her hand on Joel’s shoulder to comfort him but for now, he was past the point of consolation. He remembered how he promised that you two would get married someday and watch Sarah grow up and completely felt himself break.    

- End -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A/N: I apologize because this wasn’t on my WIP list, but the thought of this just came over me. My next work will be the Clint Barton x Male Reader fic from my WIP list.

~ Thanks for reading ~  

[madmanwonder]

My Mood

AU(S): Horror AU: Vampire AU, Fantasy World: Overlord AU, Alien AU, College AU: Tutor AU, Mundane AU, Future AU, Married AU, Celebrity AU: Agent AU, Childhood Friends AU, Mercenary AU

General Moods: Crossover AU/Crossover Fusion AU, Fusion AU, Genderswap, Friendship-to-Romance, Shipping, Wholesome, Tragedy, Drama, Angst, Tearjerker, Heartwarming, Crossover Ship

Main Muses: Male: Qrow Branwen, Male!Byleth, Male!V, Male!Commander Shepard, Garen Crownguard, Danny Phantom, Jason Todd/Red Hood, Wade Wilson/Deadpool, Ddraig, Loid Forger/Agent Twilight, Female: Velma Dinkley, Annabeth Chase, Kat (DMC: Devil May Cry), Kuvira, Kurenai Yuhi, Yunyun, Dark Samus, Marceline the Vampire Queen, Roll (Mega Man), Cynthia

Male: RWBY, SpyXFamily, Fire Emblem, Cyberpunk 2077, Highschool DxD, Marvel, DC, Danny Phantom, League of Legend, Mass Effect,

Female: Devil May Cry, Pokemon, Metroid, Scooby Doo, Adventure Time, Mega Man Series, The Camp-Half Blood Series, Naruto, Konosuba, Avatar

Meme: Relationship Status, Big [Redacted] Disability, Cheerleader Outfit, Switched Attributes, Best Date vs Worst Date, What Would X Do, Diary Confession, Crossover Crack Ship/OT3, Love Calculator, Mortal Kombat Intro (MK 1)

[therealmofamorus]

My Mood

AU(S): Bold=Main, Fusion AU

Original Male Stud AU: Bleached AU, Misogyny AU, Free Use AU, Lust Virus AU, Fantasy World AU: Guild Adventurer AU/Monster Hunter AU, Crossover AU: Star Wars AU - Sith AU, Law and Crime AU: Assassin AU/Corrupt Lawyer AU, Monster Girl AU, Office AU: CEO AU, Brothel AU: Pimp AU

Alpha Male Stud AU: Bleached AU, Misogyny AU, Free Use AU, Lust Virus AU, Fantasy World AU: Guild Adventurer AU/Monster Hunter AU, Crossover AU: Star Wars AU - Sith AU, Law and Crime AU: Assassin AU/Corrupt Lawyer AU, Monster Girl AU, Office AU: CEO AU, Brothel AU: Pimp AU

General Moods: No Meme, Crossover Pairing, Maledom x Femsub, Corruption

Muses: Bold=Main

Male: M!Commander Shepard, Arthur Arc (Jaune Arc Dad), Vergil, Ragna the Bloodedge, Monkey D.Luffy, Ryuji Sakamoto, Kevin Levin, M!V, Red (Pokemon), Percy Jacksons

Female: Naruto, Fatal Fury, Street Fighter Franchise, Legend of Zelda, Sonic the Hedgehog Series, Danganronpa, Blazblue, Star Wars, Xenoblade Chronicles Series, Game of Thrones

Meme: No Meme

[holly-poly]

Nominations Open

Nominations are open, and they'll stay open through 11:59pm EDT on 17 October. You're allowed to nominate up to 10 fandoms, with up to 10 relationships per fandom. The tag set is located here: https://archiveofourown.org/tag_sets/12906 In order to nominate a relationship, simply click the Nominate button located in the top right-hand corner of the tag set. If you do not have an account on the AO3, please let me know, and I should be able to get you an invite. On a similar note, if you have any questions, or if you're nominating something that you think might be confusing, please either post a comment to this post or send an e-mail to holly.poly.exchange@gmail.com if you'd rather keep it private. Please don't panic if I add some type of disambiguation to relationships that you nominate. Especially for ones where the same characters fall under different fandoms (various comic fandoms, movie/TV show vs. book fandoms, etc.), as doing so helps keeps tags from wandering to fandoms where they don't belong. This is an exchange for romantic and/or sexual relationships, not friendships, so make certain to nominate relationships that use a "/" rather than a "&". If you want to request that a relationship be asexual/queerplatonic/etc., then that's something to include in your optional details when signing up. More fandom specific info, rules, links and contact details behind the keep reading cut.

Please nominate original works under Original Work for the fandom. Please nominate crossovers under Crossover - Fandom for the fandom. List characters in alphabetical order by last name (and, if they don't have a last name or multiple characters share a last name, then by first name), and please put the fandom or a clear abbreviation of it after the character name. For example: Thirteenth Doctor (Doctor Who)/Ms. Frizzle (Magic School Bus)/Mary Poppins (Mary Poppins), or Female Hawke (Dragon Age)/Male Hawke (Dragon Age)/Female Shepard (Mass Effect)/Male Shepard (Mass Effect), or Hal Jordan (Green Lantern 2011)/Ryan Reynolds (RPF)/Wade Wilson (Deadpool Movieverse). If you have any crossover ships that hit the 100 character tag length limit, you can abbreviate the fandom names or leave out surnames to condense it down so long as it will still be clear which characters in the fandom and which fandoms you mean. If there's any ships that are still difficult to do that for or you're not sure if it will be clear to us/others, do let us know the ship by either commenting here or emailing us and we'll try to figure out a way to condense it. Please nominate all relationships involving characters from the MCU movies, Agents of SHIELD, Agent Carter, Hulu Marvel series, Netflix Marvel series, and/or Disney+ Marvel series under Marvel Cinematic Universe. Please nominate all of the X-Men movies under X-Men (Original Timeline Movies), X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), and Deadpool (Movieverse). The Wolverine movies go in Original Timeline. Any relationships featuring characters from movies that fall under different categories should be nominated as a Crossover. Please nominate Marvel comics under the universe they belong to: Marvel 616, Marvel Adventures, MC2, etc. If you feel the specific title they're from is complicated enough that it should be listed separately, please either leave a comment or send an e-mail with more information. Characters like America Chavez who are originally from another universe but canonically spend time in a different one can be included as part of relationships requested for either universe. Please nominate standalone Marvel movies/TV shows such as Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes or X-Men Evolution separately under the name of the specific movie/show. Please nominate DC films set in the current movie universe (Man of Steel, Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice, Suicide Squad, Wonder Woman, Justice League, Aquaman, Shazam!, Birds of Prey, Wonder Woman 1984, and The Suicide Squad) under DC Extended Universe. Please nominate relationships from various DC comics under DCU (Comics). If you feel the specific title they're from is complicated enough that it should be listed separately, please either leave a comment or send an e-mail with more information. Please nominate standalone DC movies/TV shows such as Birds of Prey (TV), Gotham, and Smallville separately as individual fandoms. Please nominate the various DC shows on The CW (Arrow, The Flash, Supergirl, Legends of Tomorrow, Black Lightning, Batwoman, and Superman & Lois) under DC's Arrowverse. Relationships including characters from The Arrowverse as well as from other DC shows like Birds of Prey or Smallville who appear due to crossover events can be nominated under this umbrella fandom, while relationships solely from Birds of Prey, Smallville, and the like should be nominated separately under the name of the show they're from. Crossover relationships featuring characters from other DC shows who do not canonically appear in The Arrowverse, even if other characters from that show do, should still be nominated under Crossovers. Please nominate the various cartoons considered part of the DCAU (Batman: The Animated Series, Superman: The Animated Series, The New Batman Adventures, Batman Beyond, Static Shock, The Zeta Project, Justice League, and Justice League Unlimited) under DC Animated Universe (Timmverse). Please nominate everything set in the Doctor Who universe under Doctor Who (including Big Finish Audios, Class, Sarah Jane Adventures, and Torchwood).

Please nominate The Good Wife and The Good Fight under The Good Wife & Related Fandoms. Please nominate Tolkien fandoms under Middle Earth – J.R.R. Tolkien or Middle Earth (Movies) or The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power (TV 2022), depending on whether you want bookverse, movieverse or the new showverse. The Silmarillion would fall under the books. Any relationships featuring a mixture of movie, book or show canon (which would include anything set in the movies but with characters who aren't in them, such as Elladan, Elrohir, Glorfindel, etc.) should be nominated as a Crossover; please specify which characterization you want for any characters who are in more than one of the bookverse, movieverse or showverse, ie. Aragorn (movies)/Elladan/Elrohir. Please nominate the Star Trek TV shows (live action or animated) under Star Trek: Classic Timeline and AOS under Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)‎. Any relationships featuring characters from both the original timeline and AOS (other than those who canonically are in both of them like Spock) should be nominated as a Crossover. Please nominate Stargate SG-1, Stargate: Atlantis, and Stargate Universe under Stargate - All Media Types. Please nominate Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel: The Series, and the assorted spinoffs (including Fray and other comics) under Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Related Fandoms. Please nominate all of the Dragon Age video games and books under Dragon Age - All Media Types. Please nominate all of the Mass Effect video games and books under Mass Affect - All Media Types. Please nominate anything Star Wars related under Star Wars - All Media Types. Please nominate Game of Thrones (TV) and A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin and House of the Dragon (TV) as separate fandoms. Please nominate Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), The Witcher (TV), and Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski as separate fandoms. Use the appropriate names for characters based on the source rather than the longer canonical tags that include multiple names (ie, for the TV show it would be Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier/Yennefer of Vengerberg rather than the canonical tag of Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg or for the video games it would be Dandelion/Eskel/Geralt of Rivia rather than the canonical tag of Eskel/Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion). Please nominate anything related to Once Upon a Time or Once Upon a Time in Wonderland under Once Upon a Time (TV). Please separate anything related to the Power Rangers television shows under Power Rangers (TV), the comics under Power Rangers (Comics), and the more recent(ish) movie under Power Rangers (2017). Please nominate anything set in Exandria under Critical Role (Web Series), including Exandria Unlimited and one shots such as The Screw Job or The Darrington Brigade. Non-Exandria one shots such as Call of Cthulhu: Shadow of the Crystal Palace should be nominated under their own names. Please nominate relationships featuring characters from various Disney/Pixar animated titles (ie, Jasmine/Megara/Mulan or Jafar/Maleficent/Ursula) under Disney - All Media Types. Relationships featuring characters from a single Disney and/or Pixar movie can be nominated under the specific movie/movie series name (ie, Cobra Bubbles/David Kawena/Nani Pelekai would be nominated under Lilo & Stitch (2002)). ~*~ Please note that while [Specific Character]/[Specific Group of Characters] is acceptable as a nomination, [Specific Character]/Everyone is too broad. For example: Lex Luthor/Lionel Luthor's Board Members is acceptable because "Lionel Luthor's Board Members" involves a finite group of people. The same goes for Voldemort/Death Eaters, Shipwrecked Sailor/Mermaids, and Peter Pan/Lost Boys. While Carol Danvers/Anyone and Everyone or Jack Harkness/Everyone He's Ever Met are understandable, they're too broad because it could essentially involve an infinite number of people. If you have any questions about a relationship you want to nominate that might potentially be too broad, leave a comment or send an e-mail. ~*~ RPF characters must be 18+ at the time of nomination. Significant others/children/etc. of public figures are not permitted unless they are public figures in their own right. ~*~ If you have any questions about what fandom to use when making nominations, or any other questions in general, please feel free to leave a comment on this Dreamwidth post or send a private message on Tumblr. You can also send an e-mail to holly.poly.exchange@gmail.com. Collection: https://ao3.org/collections/holly_poly_2022 Tag Set: https://archiveofourown.org/tag_sets/12906 Tumblr: https://holly-poly.tumblr.com/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/holly_poly_ex

[iliumheightnights]

Reiner Braun Fluff ABC's | Reiner Braun x Male Reader

Fandom: Attack on Titan Pairing: Reiner Braun x Male Reader ~~~ A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?) - Okay we all want to say he loves his boyfriend’s heart but no. He more than likely finds his boyfriend’s ass the most attractive thing. Don’t worry he still loves ya.

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?) - Yes Reiner would want a kid, maybe two...but not in a world where Marley and Paradis were still at odds. After though? For sure he does.

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?) - Big spoon. He’s the big spoon that cuddles his boyfriend pretty tight.

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?) - Awkward to say the least. He has NO idea how to date or even what dating entails. Thought the more he dates, the more romantic he gets. So LOTS OF DATES!

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…)) - “You’re my entire world M/n. Without you...I don’t know what I’d do.”

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?) - He would first start crushing on his boyfriend during training. He’d probably have a LOT of questioning going on. It wasn’t until the battle of Trost District did he truly realize he loved him.

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?) - Reiner is surprisingly gentle. This strong muscle man might be a bit awkward and strong at first, but he’d quickly get out of that and just be a soft boy! He loves hugging his boyfriend from behind and placing a kiss on his cheek. He’ll also love to carry him around as well.

H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?) - Reiner didn’t start out as a hands person but as time went on he never wanted to let his boyfriend’s hand go.

I = Impression (What was their first impression?) - Growing up in Marley, he was told the Eldian’s on Paradis were wild savages, so that’s exactly what he thought at first. Then he spent more time on Paradis and around his boyfriend. That’s really what started getting his mindset changed around.

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?) - Oh yeah he does. Jean and Eren better stay away from his boyfriend otherwise he’s going to go all armored titan on their asses. You know that deathly stare Mikasa has? Yeah, he does that.

K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?) - He’d want to kiss his boyfriend, but more than likely it’s his boyfriend that kisses him first. I can see Reiner being a rather sloppy and awkward kisser but when he’s really passionate...he’s a GREAT kisser.

L = Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?) - Reiner does. He says it right before the expedition outside the wall. Reiner knows he’ll be safe...but he’s not sure what exactly would happen after so he figured it was the time.

M = Memory (What’s their favourite memory together?) - There were two that spoke to Reiner. The first was when he and his boyfriend had snuck off during training before they were dating and went swimming in the lake late at night. The second was watching his boyfriend absolutely DOMINATING titans during the battle of Trost and Reiner being whipped for him.

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?) - No Reiner doesn’t. I mean he would want too but....do you even get paid in the survey corps? However, Reiner WILL snatch bits of extra food or lose items from places to gift to his boyfriend. It’s not stealing if it’s for love right?

O = Orange (What colour reminds them of their other half?) - Okay call me cliche but, Red, Yellow, and Orange are the only colors I can picture when I think of Reiner. They’re aggressive yet also calming and comforting all at the same time. Perfect for him.

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?) - I can see him calling his boyfriend ‘my love’, ‘beloved’, and ‘babe’.

Q = Quaint (What is their favourite non-modern thing?) - Going on walks. He likes to take little walks either through town or through the nearby forests with his boyfriend.

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?) - Cuddle session with his boyfriend and reading a book.

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?) - He sucks it up. Yeah, Reiner is one of those people that hides his emotions away from people but his boyfriend knows him pretty well. His boyfriend is the one that tries to cheer him up.

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?) - Reiner really talks about his boyfriend, and how handsome and great he is. Reiner is literally a himbo.

U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?) - Cuddles are always a good way to get him to relax. But he’s also a sucker for a good massage.

V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?) - His boyfriend and his strength. Reiner carrying his boyfriend: “Have you all seen how amazing my boyfriend is!?”

Eren and Jean: “Yeah!”

Reiner death glare intensifies.

W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?) - It doesn’t happen until...AFTER everything that goes down in the manga. It’s rather small, his mom his there along with his friends. Historia is the one to marry them, which everyone finds ironic. As for how,when and where the proposal happens...let’s just say it was during the life and death scenario.

X = Xylophone (What’s their song?) - I really wanna say wrecking ball by Miley Cyrus...I really do. But really I see Achilles come down by Gang of Youths being his song, especially after learning about his past.

Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?) - Yes. In fact, he REALLY debated not following through with the rest of the plan and just staying on Paradis with his boyfriend.

Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?) - A dog. He’d probably want like a German Shepard. He’d want an outdoor dog ya know.

[findroleplay]

Hello! I’m currently seeking partners for some fandom based roleplay stories. I have over a decade of roleplay experience and typically lead toward novella style stories (usually a minimum of 4 paragraphs). Smut and NSFW themes are allowed, but the story and characters come first. Below are a list of fandoms that I am looking for, as well as specific character and/or gender pairings:

(In stories with specific character pairings, the one I intend to play will be listed first)

•DC Comics:

• MxF Pairings:

- Dick Grayson x Barbara Gordon

- Dick Grayson x Helena Bertenelli

- Bruce Wayne x Selina Kyle

- Bruce Wayne x Diana

- OC x OC

• FxF Pairings:

- Barbara Gordon x Dinah Lance

- Barbara Gordon x Kara Zor-El

- OC x OC

• FxM Pairings:

- OC x OC

•Apex Legends:

•FxF pairings:

- Bangalore x Loba

•Mass Effect:

• FxM pairings:

- FemShep x Thane Krios

•MxF Pairings:

- Male Shepard x Liara T’Soni

- Shepard x Jack

- Shepard x Miranda Lawson

- Shepard x Tali

•FxF Pairings:

- FemShep x Liara T’Soni

- FemShep x Samantha Traynor

- Jack x Miranda Lawson

•Cyberpunk 2077

•FxF Pairings:

- Fem V x Judy Alvarez

-

[heckinhacker]

Masterlist.

League of Legends:

Headcanons:

Viktor x Faulty Machine!S/O - meeting and falling in love. 

Neeko x Human!S/O - meeting and falling in love.

Taric, Ekko, Jinx and Draven - Saving their S/O. 

Ekko x Lost!Fem!S/O - headcanons

Shen x Young Kinkou Student!S/O - meeting and falling in love .

Shen x S/O - Fluffy Headcanons.

Kayn x S/O - Angsty ending.

Taric,Kayn and Ekko - holding hands with their easily frustrated S/O.

Star Guardian!Zoe x reader - “meeting and falling in love”

Ezreal, Ekko, Jayce, Viktor - pick up lines.

Aatrox and Varus - comforting S/O after awful nightmares.

Aatrox, Nasus and Azir - seeing their S/O in onesie.

Star Guardian!Xayah x Star Guardian!Fem!S/O - meeting and falling in love.

Zed - SFW/NSFW headcanons (NSFW, of course ^^”)

Taric, Aatrox and Ekko - giving massage to their S/O

Taric, Aatrox and Ekko - getting massage from their S/O

Odyssey!Kayn x S/O - SFW/NSFW headcanons. (NSFW)

Aatrox - NSFW headcanons (NSFW)

Akali x Fem!S/O - meeting and falling in love

Vi and Kayn x S/O - dating headcanons. (separately, just to be clear ;v;)

Kayn x Vi - dating headcanons (as a ship)

Karma x S/O - dating headcanons

Kayn x S/O - general dating headcanons

Sett x Feline Vastaya!S/O - First ecounter after he notices you.

Sett x Feline Vastaya!S/O - You got ambushed!

Sett x Feline Vastaya!S/O - Nightmares.

Sett x Pit Fighter!S/O - How he notices you (and falls for you at the same time).

Circus AU! headcanons.

Rakan and Sett realising they have fallen for a male. 

Aphelios - SFW/NSFW general headcanons~! (NSFW)

Aphelios x Aspect!Reader - SFW/NSFW headcanons! (NSFW)

Sett x Shapeshifter!S/O - meeting and falling in love.

Kegan Rodhe(Brand) x S/O - meeting and falling in love.

Garen and JarvanIV x S/O - SFW and NSFW headcanons. (NSFW)

Sett as Big Brother figure Headcanons.

Sett x Cat Vastaya!Reader - discovery over jealousy.

Sett x Vi - dating headcanons.

Ekko x Piltover!S/O -same opinions.

Shaco x S/O - general dating headcanons.

Talon x Yandere!S/O - meeting and falling in love.

True Damage!Yasuo x S/O - hate on loved one.(reference to “I’m glad you’re evil too”)

Aatrox with Cute and Fragile S/O! - SFW and NSFW headcanons. (NSFW)

Alune x Seer!Fem!S/O - meeting and falling in love!

Fanfics:

True Damage!Yasuo x reader - I’m glad you’re evil too.

Blood Moon!Aatrox x Demon!reader - Insane between crazy.

Ekko x Fem!Reader - The worst time possible. (NSFW)

Xayah x Fem!Reader -  Vastayan Goodbye. [English] [Polish]

Swain x Reader - Devotion.

Talon x Reader - Valentine’s special day. 

Vladimir x Reader - Jealous is a little word. 

Short scenes:

Pyke x reader - Trust 

Aatrox, Zed and Shen - finding out their S/O is afraid of the dark. 

Odyssey!Yasuo x reader - Finally home.

Mordekaiser x Fem!Reader - Sudden Impact. [NSFW’ish, just suggestive.]

Shaco x Paranoid!Reader - Peekaboo!

Aphelios x Reader - Temptation. ; Viktor x Reader - Privacy. [NSFW’ish, suggestive]

Talon x Reader - Confession.

Yasuo x Reader - Be more careful.

Urgot and Reader - You got a friend in me.

Jarvan IV x Fem!Reader - For Demacia. 

Yorick x Soul Shepard!Reader - It’s been so long, friend…

NSFW Alphabets: 

Yasuo’s NSFW Alphabet! [Full!]

Talon’s NSFW Alphabet! [AEIUY]

Sett’s NSFW Alphabet! [Full]

Zed’s NSFW Alphabet! [A B E N O] [ G R T W Z]

Swain’s NSFW Alphabet! [ S W A I N ]

Viktor’s NSFW Alphabet! [ A C K O W ]

Jayce’s NSFW Alphabet! [ A J K M O ]

Irelia’s NSFW Alphabet! [Full]

Kayn’s NSFW Alphabet! [ B O R W Z ]

Sylas’s NSFW Alphabet! [ K L O U V ]

Aphelios’s NSFW Alphabet! [A P H E L]

Aatrox’s NSFW Alphabet! [S E H R G]

Evelynn’s NSFW Alphabet! [Full]

Overwatch:

Headcanons:

Positive Reaper Headcanons.

Tracer x Male!Reader - meeting and falling in love.

Mei x Reader - Cute relationship headcanons.

Junkers x Healer!Reader - How hard life can get…

Ana x Fem!S/O - general dating headcanons.

Fanfics: 

Genji x Reader - “How do I say…” (Flowershop!AU)

Jojo’s Bizzare Adventure:

Headcanons:

Risotto Nero - taking care of his sick S/O.

Boku no Hero Academia

Headcanons:

Todoroki Shoto x Fem!S/O - relationship headcanons.

South Park: 

Headcanons:

Kyle x Fem!S/O - New Student in South Park?!

Yuuri! on Ice:

Headcanons:

Victor’s sister!Reader and Yuuri - best friends headcanons. (platonic)

[spoopyghostgirl]

And now is my canon Shepard, Jax

Name: Jackson James Shepard

Nickname(s): Jax, James, Jim, Shep, Sheepy

Gender: Male

Age: 27 years old (ME1)

Birthday: November 18th

Previous Homeworld: Earth

Current Homeworld: None recently

Sexual Orientation: Bisexual

Race: Mixed

Voice: Tucker, Red VS Blue

Personality: Jax is a very lighthearted person, easy to make laugh, and quick to smile. Despite his immensely sunny demeanor, he finds it difficult to relate to others, not for s lack of trying but because he is very shy. That is, unless he is working and then he is a firm, no nonsense, straight forward man.

Family or Relatives: His mother is Amelia Shepard, originally from England. His father is Admiral Hackett, though their relationship was hidden given his mother and fathers places within the alliance. The pair met during a search and rescue mission, Amelia pulling Hackett from behind enemy lines. He thought she was an angel sent to deliver his immortal soul. Waking up later, he was very embarrassed but it ended up working in his favor, since the beautiful lieutenant came to visit him several times during his hospital stay, and if Jax is any sign, those visits continued long after he was released.

Relationships: He originally has a relationship with Tali, though that relationship is ended when she discovers he works for Cerberus (and that he may or may not have taken up casually sleeping with Hades). He later develops feelings for Jack, joking that he has a thing for scary women before ultimately ending that relationship.

Morality: Lawful Good

Pre-Service History: Spacer. Given that both of his parents are high ranking service members, and that his parents were trying to be discrete about both their relationship and Jax's parentage, the young Jax spent most of his time bouncing between ships.

Psychological Profile: War Hero

Addictions: Caffeine, mostly becoming attached to it post promotion in ME1 since he has access to some really nice coffee/espresso. Later becomes addicted to the suped up version that Hades introduces him to when they visit her homeworld. After that, Earth coffee doesn't cut it.

Role model(s): Captain Anderson, his fathers closest friend and one of the biggest players when it came to hiding Jax's parentage. His mother, who despite becoming pregnant during the peak of her career, never slowed down, and achieved greatness. The Spectres, a group of highly trained warriors from several races across the galaxy.

Beliefs: He isn't particularly religious but he does believe in an afterlife. Would suck if you died and that was it.

Habits: Drumming his fingers on desks and his thighs when stressed. Humming to himself in difficult situations, whether on the field or waiting for important calls/meetings. Messing with the paint on his armor whenever he needs to keep his hands or mind busy. Has definitely rushed out on a mission in mismatched armor, thanks to getting interrupted mid repaint.

Hobbies: Plays the cello, something his mother had him learn as a child. Enjoys dancing, also took ballet lessons as a child, which later came in handy in his line of work. Likes painting with Hades, the pair taking turns as each others canvases. Building models (really just legos) and vegging out and watching old vids.

Source of Anger/Hatred: Racism, whether its humans or aliens mistreating each other or people of the same race mistreating each other. Childish people, mistreatment of the less fortunate. Cerberus. Hades shitty family.

Source of Sadness/Sorrow: Lossing loved ones. Losing a good portion of his team defending colonists during a raid. Finding out the awful shit his friends and crew have gone through.

Source of Fear/Phobia: Hates spiders, despite there being other things to fear in the galaxy. Hates heights, it's one thing to be in a ship but a completely different thing to be walking around somewhere high up or near large glass windows in high places. Definitely gets teased about it.

Likes: Music, especially electric music, music that gets you moving. Exercising, though he had prefer methods of exercising. Spicy food, especially anything with jalapenos in it. The colors yellow, blue, and green. Likes taking walks at night and singing along to whatever music is playing. Big animal guy, couldn't have any as a child so as an adult, he goes to shelters, volunteers to walk dogs and other animals that need some love.

Dislikes: Sitting still or being idle, he understands when its necessary but hates when it makes him feel useless or trapped. Not big into heavy foods, they make him sleepy, and a sleepy soldier is a dead one. Does not like the quiet, having grown up on a military vessel, he was constantly around other people. Makes him uncomfortable at the prospect of being in his own room. Can be found sleeping in an open bunk in the communal sleeping area.

Weight: 220 lbs

Height: 6'4

Build: Lean Muscular

Scar(s): Scar on his left back shoulder blade that looks like a several pointed star, was shot in the back close range. Another scar on his right forearm that look like little shots of lightning, from being electrocuted.

Tattoo(s): Several on his upper bicep, both arms and shoulder blades. They vary in what they are. Some are local fauna that he saw on different ships and colonies he's been to/on. Has an N7 tattoo under his right collar bone, about his peck.

Skin Tone: Depends on direct sunlight. His skin tone is normally a warm mocha with some honey brown tones in his cheeks, chest, and arms. Other times, if he has shore leave somewhere sunny, he can get closer to more of a milk chocolate tone. He was dark when he was younger but his skin tone has gotten a bit lighter as he got older.

Facial Features: Strong, high cheek bones. A more square chin and full lips. Long dark lashes, around a pair of granny Smith green eyes. His nose is slightly bulbed, a trait he acquired from his father. In his later he had his right brow and septum pierced but removed both when he join the military.

Hair Style: He normally has it grown out and braided but the military requires him to keep it short. Is normally just a flat buzz cut but, when he is relieved of duty before ME3 he has grown it out again and taken to dreading it.

Hair  color: A midnight brown, almost black.

Eye color: Granny Smith green.

Eye Style: Almond shaped eyes. Regularly called expesssive, making him a rather bad liar.

Helmet: Death mask Helmet

Visor Optics/Lens: Archon visor

Armor set: N7 Defender Armor

Utility Attachment: Ordance Packs (increases amount of ammo that can be carried)

Primary Colour: Matte black

Secondary Colour: seafoam green

Tertiary Colour: Eggshell yellow

Casual Clothing: Big into plaid button ups and crew neck t shirts. Occasionally wears v necks and cut offs. Has a black leather jacket with a hood that is his go to jacket. Wears slim fitting jeans and either dress shoes (preferably brown) or nice tennies.

Faction/Occupation/Affiliation: Commander of the Alliance/Council Spectre ME1, Cerberus Commander/operative ME2, Council Spectre ME3

Artificial Intelligence(A.I)/Companion: EDI whenever necessary or available

Allies/Friends: ME crew, Hades, Councilman Zeus.

Rivals/Frienemies: Hades, mostly in a friendly fashion when it comes to getting things done faster. The Council, since they seem to love and hate him.

Nemesis/Enemies: Cerberus, post ME2

Class: Solider/Adept

Category Threat Level: 9 ME1, 12 ME2 + 3

Rank: Commander/Spectre

Standard/Modified Weapons: 

1. Diamond Back X Assault Rifle

2.M-98 Widow Anti-Material Rifle

3. Cobra X line pistol

Armor Abilities(AA):

1. Kinetic Exoskeleton

2. Shock absorbers

Genetic Augmentation: Is a biotic with an M3 implant. Was chosen for advance biotics during his early Alliance days. Occasionally gets nose bleeds and headaches when over using biotics.

Supernatural Powers: None

Skills/Specialization: Jax is an exceptional biotic, his main go to attacks being throw and shockwave. While he primarily uses his biotics, he had made sure he is still very skilled within close range with pistols, combat knives, mid range with an SMG, and is at least adept when it comes to long range with a sniper.

[x3no9]

Like Cyberpunk themes? Just wrote a Cyberpunk 2077 and Mass Effect crossover fic a few months back...

[nautseverywhere]

I posted 3,489 times in 2021

230 posts created (7%)

3259 posts reblogged (93%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 14.2 posts.

I added 2,144 tags in 2021

#kerry eurodyne - 372 posts

#cyberpunk 2077 - 351 posts

#mass effect - 264 posts

#kaidan alenko - 247 posts

#mshenko - 245 posts

#commander shepard - 155 posts

#paladin danse - 151 posts

#male v - 130 posts

#kerry x v - 122 posts

#fallout 4 - 107 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#kaidans face alone at the end of me when he thinks shep is dead is enough for this to be canon... regardless of shepard being male or female

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Well, my canon is that he is the Nerevarine so.......YES!!!!!!!!!!

My dragonborn's husband is a damn hero of legend who met Saint Jiub once you know?????

53 notes • Posted 2021-11-16 18:13:10 GMT

#4

See the full post

54 notes • Posted 2021-08-04 21:49:32 GMT

#3

Never did I think my ass in Scotland would ever get Sorey or Mikleo as they generally didn't surface outside Japan but....I finally have them!!!!!!!

79 notes • Posted 2021-05-01 15:05:32 GMT

#2

See the full post

86 notes • Posted 2021-05-26 22:45:09 GMT

#1

I'm sorry but....WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE????????

They may be part of the Whispering Hills mod....I dont have any others that would do that!!!

148 notes • Posted 2021-01-27 01:06:18 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[cowboypossume]

sdfghj I'm so sorry for coming back to this so late I am living in Tumblr bliss without checking my inbox but a) babe is totally fine I love that!! and my names aru (no a, you were close though!!)

yeah I'm like...halfway ash through the book? Simon snow needs a break but I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR YOUR OPINIONS EVEN IF THEY WEREN'T GOOD

AND SORRY FOR NOT RESPONDING TO YOUR DMs I'm really bad at messaging I'll try to get better!!!

hey hey don’t sweat about the dm thing ! the inbox is something i can learn to do :D !!! but ok you and spoilers throughout literally the entire and this is gonna be a lot and unedited (mostly) because BEHZYZTGZYSHSYHZUENEUSBS IM SO U P S E T

undeather the - - - - - - is when the spoilers stop

ok, ok, getting striaght to the point. it’s so horny. it’s so horny. and for W H A T ? WHAT THE FUCK WAS THE REASON FOR IT TOBE T H A T HORNY? AND EVEN THEN ALL OF THE SEX STUFF WAS SO V A U G E ? LIKE EVERY TIME SIMON AND BAZ WERE TOGETHER IT TYRNED INTO SEX AND YES OK AS AN ACE I G E T HOW MUCH SEX CAN COME UP, BUT LIKE, ENDYXHZYGSHSYZGE WHAT WAS THAT?? IT WASNT EVEN WELL WRITTEN! IT WAS JUST SIMON BEING LIKE “i want more but it’s not enough” AND LIKE NOT REALLY ELABORATING ?? AND THEN THEYD BE SHARING A CUTE MOMENT THEN *bam* HORNY AGAIN? OK ALSO AS FAR I KNOW RAINBOW ROWELLE IS A CIS HET STRAIGHT WOMEN .. BABE WE DONT NEED THAT MUCH SEX BETWEEN THE MLM RELATIONSHIP??? AND THEN WJEN THEY ACTUALLY KIND OF EVEN HAVE SEX ITS SO V A U G E (AGAIN!) ITS NOT UNTIL SEVERAL PAGES LATER I REALIZED THAT THAT TIME WAS ACTUALLY SEX VS ALL THE TIMES IT WASNT? I DIDNT LIKE IT !!

ok now that i’m done being upset about how fucking vague it was, i also didn’t like how it was used as a metaphor for simon wanting to actually try in a relationship? yes it’s important to try in relationships and compromise and try when you don’t want to, that’s important, obviously, but like ,, you’re allowed to have your own believes about sex. that doesn’t have to be the soul focus of your relationship. baz himself even admits that they “have bigger things to worry about”. there are ways to show growth in a relationship without sex, and even if you do, IT DOESNT NEED TO BE THAT VAUGE?? AND OFTEN? simon felt overwhelmed in those positions and then was like “ok lol i’m done with anxiety and just gonna try now and no more anxiety :)” it felt like to me? and then bam bow horny. ALSO. ITS NOW CANNONICAL SIMON HAS A BLOOD KINK ????

ALSO! THAT SCENE IN THE SEWER WAS BAZ BEING LIKE

“please fucking stop about asking me to drain you. i’m makes me so uncomfortable and scared and stop.”

and simon was like “but it’s hotttttt”. WHAT ?? BABE WE DONT HAVE TIME TO UNPACK ALL OF THAT.

WHICH BRINGS ME TO NEXT POINT: WHY? WHY THE FUCK DID SIMON GROWL??? W H A T?? WHAT THE FUCK?? WHAT THE FUCK WAS HIM G R OW L I N G WHEN HE SPOKE??

and ok something i didn’t fit in before was all the weird ways the kissing scenes were described? i’m from america so maybe it’s like a dialect thing i don’t understand, but constantly hearing “i shove my nose into his face” while they were kissing was so weird?? like shove, similar words i frankly don’t want to remember, we’re used all the time? and for what? hmmm??? what was that?????? i cant express to you how of a fever dream this book was?? but ohohoho i have more to unpack.

penny to me always felt like the token diversity friend when it wasn’t in her point of view (and even then pushing it) and so i didn’t love her character. but!! her and simon’s friendship was realistic. i could get behind that. HOWEVER. THIS BOOK TAKES THAT AWAY. SIMON once is like “give me space” and then she’s just like “ok” and i feel like their friendship never got repaired at the end? i stopped really paying attention because fucking shit i was so tired of the constant sex between baz and simon that i zoned out most of it so maybe it did but ,, i don’t think it did. i’m pretty sure she got with shepard and then he got with baz and then that was the end of the friendship because ✨ooooo we’re dating people✨ thing. which ,, isn’t how it happens??

and while we’re here: i didn’t like the penny and shepard ship but whatever it felt like it was inevitable like female x male loki so i was like “huh disappointed but not surprised” feeling when they kissed. if you like it, cool great (/gen), i didnt and that’s swaggy but, ok, the plot of shepard being engaged to a female demon who i think wants to fuck him in hell only to be resolved in like 2 pages of a monologue so penny and shepard can get together was ?? so WEIRD ??? like what was that ?? how did that develop their relationship? idk it was so weird.

but ok back to simon and penny, i kept reading and reading and reading on so i could maybe get to at least talk again and then,, they didn’t? they just didn’t. they never made up their friendship and i get that you lose friends along your life. believe me i’m the last person you have to drive that point home to. but,,,,, god i hated that their friendship ended. for WHAT REASON DID IT END?? simon said he needed space, penny respected that, got a boyfriend and simon did too, so no longer theyre friends? something i liked about this series was the group dynamic all of the books had. no matter who’s pov it was in you could tell who each character was because it was unqiue. you still could in this book so i’ll give credit where credit’s due. however THIS BOOK WAS LIKE 3 ENTIRELY DIFFERENT STORIES WITH NO CONECTJON REWLLY ?? WHICH IS FINE I JUST ,, didn’t get that in the first two books so ,,,, why is it here ?

and ok something else while i’m criticizing is: i don’t love her writing style. i didn’t like how in book one i got “here’s an introduction to my magical word told through past tense and memories and so hopefully you’re all caught up now” which i was willing to overlook because just because i don’t like the style means it bad. at least this book didn’t do that but idk didn’t love that aspect.

ok back to the three stories: i love agatha being a bisexual goat care taker. that’s it literally she should have been the main character. like deadass i loved her story so much. that’s it that’s all /pos.

ok but! simon finding his family was cool. i liked that he got that. the pacing of the scene where he finds out was a little rushed for me but, then again, based on my writing i can’t really critique on that so … liked it, enough. idk how to elaborate. wasn’t the worst part of this book but doesn’t really sit well with me.

and i’m so confused about simon’s wings. he does want them and constantly brings up his surgery and then all of a sudden ,, doesn’t? i think? the last chapter is so vague and simon mentions being on the fence about it and i understand that we as the reader don’t need to know everything about what the future holds for these characters but also ?? beudhyzhsgsbeysyzb babe he brought it up like all the time and can i please get a solid answer ??

aLSO. WHY DID SIMON AND BAZ BREAKUP ONLY FOR THEM TO GET TOGETHER 5 CHAPTERS LATER?? WHAYDYXYZGWH WHAT WAS THE POINT OF WAYWAYRD SON IF SHE JUST DID THAT???? LIKE WHXGXYVZYZHE YOU MADE THEM STAY TOGETHER WHEN SIMON WAS BEING AN ACTUAL DICK FOR AN ENTIRE BOOK (which i will defend until the day i die those scenes weren’t an OUNCE of how horny this book is), THEY BREAKUP, AND THEN GET TOGETHER AGAIN?? NOT EVEN 100 PAGES AFTER THEY BREAKUP??? SHZGZGZYSGSU W H A T? WHAT? I DONT GET IT? i don’t get it.

i kept waiting for the scene where everything came together and it never came. then the epilogue didn’t clarify anything either.

i don’t know. there’s more probably i just didn’t enjoy this book. i would have given it a 5/10 the first time i read it but the more i think about it the lower that number goes so ,, yea not a good time.

- - - - - -

so! that’s a lot! completely get it if you disagree :D. you’re allowed to like a book even though i don’t. and also i have no energy to edit this so enjoy me screaming about it !

[marseilled]

A-Z for that ask please

A: Age.

18

B: Where I'm from

poland

.C: Where I would like to live.

belgium or the netherlands 

D: Favourite food.

pizza and pasta

E: Religion.

nope

F: Sexual orientation.

pan

G: Single/taken.

taken

H: Favourite book

all quiet on the western front 

.I: Eye colour.

grey or green

J: Favourite movie.

dont have a favourite

K: Favourite TV show

band of brothers

.L: Favourite band/singer.

depeche mode

M: Random fact about me.

i have a scar that looks like a llama 

N: Favorite day of the year

???? idk my birthday?

.O: Favourite colour.

blood red

P: If I have any pets; if so, their names.

i want a german shepard and call is kaiser 

Q: What I'm listening to right now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcpQU0f2pqs

R: Last movie I've watched.

dont remember 

S: What's my ringtone.

just like a default apple ringtone 

T: Favourite male character from a TV show

Lewix Nixon

.U: Favourite female character from a TV show.

daenerys targaryen

V: What my name means.

“One who is happy in war”

W: Favourite superhero.

dont have a favourite

X: Celebrity crush.

dont have one

Y: My birthday.

19th january 

Z: Ever self-harmed? 

nope

[gay-zing]

rumy! what are some of your favorite games to play?

anon! do you mean video games? i hope you mean video games or this is gonna be awkward…………………

dragon age

all of them, from “origins” to “dragon age 2″ to “inquisition”, they are all superb and it’s one giant story unfolding over 3 (and hopefully one day, 4) games where you often get to play characters you’ve met before, grown to love, etc. VERY VERY lgbtq+ inclusive btw (options to romance companions as a bi/gay person, there’s a trans npc which is adore, and canon gay & lesbian companions with strictly lgbt-related backstory, etc)

mass effect

same producers as dragon age, another trilogy that has more or less the same mechanics as DA – except that it happens in space, aliens are gay and the world is ending. also the amount of sass is off the charts so i defo recommend it if only for commander shepard’s (male or female) boss-ass one-liners.

borderlands

i STRONGLY RECOMMEND tales from the borderlands (it’s like a huge film ON CRACK where you get to pick dialogue options & life-altering choices and then u gotta live with them) – borderlands 2 (best to play with online friends, just as crazy, MEMES EVERYWHERE, my most fav of the whole franchise tbh!!!!!!!!!!!!!) – borderlands: the pre-sequel (best to play with online friends, and especially after bl2 or else you won’t understand anything)

skyrim

get “the elder scrolls V” and nothing else, it’s the best one & you can play it for days it’s just beautiful and atmospheric and funny and open-world and i recommend it always (single player)

dishonored

i started playing this one very recently so i can’t say how good the whole franchise is (2 games), but right now i’m at 3/4th of the 1st game and it’s super freaking awesome!! it’s a steampunk stealth game that reminds me of assassin’s creed except it has way more gore & magic (and fast-paced plot /coughs), your choices have (pretty dire) consequences & the atmosphere is so dark & creepy but also elegant i can barely describe it lmao. it’s A+

amnesia: memories

*rubs hands* ok so this is an otome, aka “japanese dating game”, and the art is gorgeous and the soundtrack is fun and engaging – until you realize there’s something seriously fucked up and you start dying right & left lmao. i love this trash game so much, and it’s seriously the prettiest i’ve seen so far.

starfighter: eclipse

another otome, but this one is strictly gay, though! (also, um, it’s basically porn in space); it’s a sort of a spin-off from the popular webcomic of the same name (you can read it freely on the official site) so i defo recommend reading that comic first and then getting the game (i think the site to get it from is called ‘datenighto’). i don’t exactly loooooove this game but i ADORE the comic & the universe & yeah i’d defo replay all routes *eye emoji*

dramatical murder

yeee another otome. this one is way less graphic than eclipse, but you still get the option of ending up w/ one of the many male characters. it has a few problems here and there but all in all it’s got an intense story, funny dialogues, cute characters and… i think a fair amount of blood & scary stuff, too. you can get it from here + english patch!

assassin’s creed II

this one and the 3rd (that i still gotta play) are in my opinion the only ones worth getting. i tried the 1st one and it was just boring af, and i’ve only heard negative reviews from the rest of the games. so i’d recommend you get ac2 without hesitation: it’s badass & humorous (IT HAS MEMES) & you lowkey learn some history, too.

rayman 3 + rayman: legends

i’ve been playing these 2 games since i was a kid and they are still so. freaking. good. R3 is in 3D so you get to move around, the story is hilarious, the graphism is all cute & cuddly and you can play it over and over and over tbh. as for Legends it’s back to a more 2-dimensional look BUT they’ve come up with mORE cutesy characters and monsters and stuff to collect, there are a lot of different levels where you go to shiny/psychedelic worlds and it’s still as crazy & fun. i will ALWAYS recommend these games!

garry’s mod

i only recently started this game, and since im only playing it with my sister it can get boring. we did laugh a lot tho, especially since we are in the same room, so i just know we’ll be playing again soon (and i WANNA play). it’s a multiplayer platform where u get to download games others have made and then tweak them as you like, and our fav game right now is one where half the players turn into stuff (at will) and hide inside the game, and the other half have to catch them and shoot them to death. it’s…. way funnier than it sounds. just picture yourself chasing a table with a crowbar x) ALTHO i’d only recommend this if you have (enough) online friends who have it or at least 1 sibling willing to get it too!

the wolf among us

this game is by the same producers as tales from the borderlands, so it’s the same “movie” (very film noir tbh) where you get to move around from time to time, claw at people and pick up grumpy dialogue choices. cus, ya, you’re a werewolf in a city full of other ‘retired’ magical creatures. tRUST ME it’s sooooooooooooooo good. a masterpiece. we are currently waiting on s2 but i still recommend it a HELLA.

[slvaught-blog]

Week 1 - Research and Hypothesis

I have begun my research into the Adolescent Health data set (AddHealth). As a teacher in secondary education I was interested in the data they had collected on their academic ability and health factors that could have an association with success in school. After reviewing the codebook I found the section on academics and school and printed this section of the code book. I then began reviewing the rest of the codebook to see if there was something that sparked my interest.

I remember having a conversation with one of our therapists about a student that was struggling in my statistics class. He had been diagnosed with ADHD and it was causing his inattentiveness and distraction in class. She told me that when the student participated in marching band first semester she saw fewer of the symptoms of his ADHD because of his higher level of physical activity during this time.

This made me wonder if a level of physical activity would be associated with academic success? Also, if a level of physical activity would be associated with students’ level of attentiveness in class.

I was interested in the association between students’ academic success and physical activity on those diagnosed with ADHD but this information was not available in the Addhealth data set.

 I researched previous studies on these associations in google scholar. I found quite a few studies on the relationship between physical activity and academic achievement, but only a few on the relationship between physical activity and attentiveness. Here are my results.

 Search term: Association between physical activity and attention span in students

·         Effect of Physical Education and Activity Levels on Academic Achievement in Children DAWN PODULKA COE1 , JAMES M. PIVARNIK1,2, CHRISTOPHER J. WOMACK1 , MATHEW J. REEVES2 , and ROBERT M. MALINA3

https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Christopher_Womack/publication/6899305_Effect_of_Physical_Education_and_Activity_Levels_on_Academic_Achievement_in_Children/links/0a85e53396f357dc2c000000.pdf

 experiment – random assignment of children to physical education either first or second semester (no association)

Obs. Study – polled on physical activity outside of school

               Students who either performed some or met Healthy People 2010 guidelines for vigorous activity had significantly higher grades (P < 0.05) than students who performed no vigorous activity in both semesters.

               Bilibiography-

o   CATERINO, M. C., and E. D. POLAK. Effects of two types of activity on the performance of second-, third-, and fourth-grade students on a test of concentration. Percept. Mot. Skills 89:245–248, 1999

o   CATERINO, M. C., and E. D. POLAK. Effects of two types of activity on the performance of second-, third-, and fourth-grade students on a test of concentration. Percept. Mot. Skills 89:245–248, 1999

o   DWYER, T., J. F. SALLIS, L. BLIZZARD, R. LAZARUS, and K. DEAN. Relationship of academic performance to physical activity and fitness in children. Pediatric Exercise Science 13:225–237, 2001.

o   KEAYS, J. J., and K. R. ALLISON. The effects of regular moderate to vigorous physical activity on student outcomes: a review. Can. J. Public Health 86:62–66, 1995.

o   MCNAUGHTEN, D., and C. GABBARD. Physical exertion and immediate mental performance in sixth-grade children. Percept. Mot. Skills 77:1155–1159, 1993

o   TREMBLAY, M. S., J. W. INMAN, and J. D. WILLMS. The relationship between physical activity, self-esteem, and academic achievement in 12-year-old children. Pediatric Exercise Science 12:312–323, 2000.

 ·         Children with attention deficits concentrate better after walk in the park A Faber Taylor, FE Kuo

http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/1087054708323000

Students diagnosed with ADHD walked in a park, downtown area, and neighborhood for 30 minutes (randomly assigned order) with 1 week between treatments. After each walk concentration was measured using Digit Span Backwards. Children with ADHD concentrated better after the walk in the park than after the downtown walk (p = .0229) or the neighborhood walk (p = .0072). 

Bibliography –

o   Fiore, T.A., Becker, E.A., & Nero, R.C. (1993). Interventions for students with attention deficits . Exceptional Children: Special Issue: Issues in Education of Children with Attention Deficit Disorder, 60(2), 163-173. Google Scholar

o   Hallowell, E., & Ratey, J. (1994). Driven to distraction: Recognizing and coping with attention deficit disorder from childhood through adulthood. New York: Pantheon. Google Scholar

 Search Term: Association between physical activity and academic success in students

·         Is There a Relationship Between Physical Fitness and Academic Achievement? Positive Results From Public School Children in the Northeastern United States: Virginia R. Chomitz PhD, Meghan M. Slining MS, MPH, Robert J. McGowan EdD, Suzanne E. Mitchell MD, MS, Glen F. Dawson MA, Karen A. Hacker MD, MPH

 http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1746-1561.2008.00371.x/full

 This study judged academic success on the students passing the Massachusetts Comprehensive Assessment System (MCAS) in Mathematics and English (grades four, six, and eight) and fitness achievement as the number of physical fitness tests the students passed in their physical education classes.

Multivariate logistic regression analyses were conducted to assess the probability of passing the MCAS tests, controlling for students’ weight status (BMI z score), ethnicity, gender, grade, and socioeconomic status (school lunch enrollment).

The odds of passing both the MCAS Mathematics test and the MCAS English test increased as the number of fitness tests passed increased (p < .0001 and p < .05, respectively).

Bibliography:

o   Takuro Higashiura, Keita Kamijo, Association of childhood fitness with academic achievement and cognitive function, Journal of Health Psychology Research, 2017, 29, Special_issue, 153

o   Kent A Lorenz, Michalis Stylianou, Shannon Moore, Pamela Hodges Kulinna, Does fitness make the grade? The relationship between elementary students’ physical fitness and academic grades, Health Education Journal, 2017, 76, 3, 302

o   Laura Chaddock-Heyman, Kirk I. Erickson, Michael A. Chappell, Curtis L. Johnson, Caitlin Kienzler, Anya Knecht, Eric S. Drollette, Lauren B. Raine, Mark R. Scudder, Shih-Chun Kao, Charles H. Hillman, Arthur F. Kramer, Aerobic fitness is associated with greater hippocampal cerebral blood flow in children, Developmental Cognitive Neuroscience, 2016, 20, 52

o   Joseph E. Donnelly, Charles H. Hillman, Darla Castelli, Jennifer L. Etnier, Sarah Lee, Phillip Tomporowski, Kate Lambourne, Amanda N. Szabo-Reed, Physical Activity, Fitness, Cognitive Function, and Academic Achievement in Children, Medicine & Science in Sports & Exercise, 2016, 48, 6, 1197

o   C. C. A. Santana, L. B. Azevedo, M. T. Cattuzzo, J. O. Hill, L. P. Andrade, W. L. Prado, Physical fitness and academic performance in youth: A systematic review, Scandinavian Journal of Medicine & Science in Sports, 2016

 ·         Physical Fitness and Academic Achievement. Grissom JB - Journal of Exercise Physiology Online, 2005

 Scores on FITNESSGRAM (a physical fitness test) were compared to reading and mathematics scores on the Stanford Achievement Test in grades five, seven, and nine. Results indicate a consistent positive relationship between overall fitness and academic achievement. That is, as overall fitness scores improved, mean achievement scores also improved. This relationship between fitness and achievement appeared to be stronger for females than males and stronger for higher socioeconomic status (SES) than lower SES students

 Bibliography:

 o   Dwyer T., Sallis JF, Blizzard L, Lazarus R, Dean K. Relation of academic performance to physical activity in children. Ped Exerc Sci 2001;13:225-237.

o   Shepard LA, Flexer RJ, Hiebert EH, Marion SF, Mayfield V, Weston TJ. (Effects of introducing classroom performance assessments on student learning. Education Measurement: Issues and Practices 1996;15(3):7-18.