#makes my heart feel like its breaking

[freakshowcowboy]

every waking moment i am haunted. she was saved from burning to be his redemption, immortal child, his daughter,sister,doll. to be failed again and again as he chooses again and again his lovers over her while those lovers snap her wings. to be never chosen. until a weird white lady she met by happenstance accepts death to stay by her side. to, finally, burn. dusted in her immortal companions ashes, she burns. staring into the eyes of her maker, she burns. chosen and unchosen, she burns.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i have a Scene - a Plot if you will - that backs this as context. y'all are gonna have to trust me on this one <3 or read the tags...

[beescake]

Sorry for the spam (^o^;) I just really like your blog

no need to apologize ayy!

in this corner we welcome all forms of enjoyment, regardless of whether you're a

happy to have yall here w me,

headin into homestuck 2024 :^)

[deoidesign]

A short comic I made for an anthology

[grantihare]

our cat broke his hip on christmas

hi, your local guy-with-a-blog is here to dox himself so his cat can walk again!

i made posts earlier as this was happening, but now that i've heard back from enough vets to get an idea of how steep this is going to be, i can't not ask for help.

its cheesy to say, but my cats are my everything. mordred, especially, spends his days basically glued to my side. he's my little shadow, and i don't know where i'd be without him.

when he woke me up to feed him at 6am on christmas morning, he was completely fine. i went back to sleep after, and when i woke up for real at 8, he was limp on the ground. when we went to move him, he howled and thrashed like we were torturing him. he ran, and we saw he wasn't using his right back leg.

many tears and an anxiety riddled 4 hour wait for our emergency vet appointment later, we were told he had a right capital physeal fracture, which basically means he snapped the ball bit of the ball joint in his hip. the vet said the best option for him is a femoral head and neck ostectomy (FHO), which'll take the broke bit of his bone out and the scar tissue will sort of just grow in the right way to replace his missing joint (cats are so weird)

its the cheapest option, and its the one with the best success rate, which is super lucky. unfortunately, its still expensive as fuck.

weve been quoted anywhere between 3.5k and 8k by vets i've contacted so far, and most need at least half as a downpayment before they'll operate. it'd take us years to cover the full cost by ourselves. so we've got to break out the big guns - a full gofundme, which will be shared with basically everyone we know, and hopefully far past that as well. carecredit can only cover so much for us, and our immediate family can't afford to lend us much. the internet is our only hope for meeting the full cost and getting mordred better

mordred's the light of my life and i can't stand to see him in pain like this. anything helps. if youre not in a financial state where you can donate, spreading the word is just as important and just as deeply appreciated.

thank you so much for getting this far.

our gofundme is here

[ganondoodle]

so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-

but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again

(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)

i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)

weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward

but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.

right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)

[angelmush]

starting to feel my enjoyment of cooking seeping back in after a long period of intense burnout that had me really slogging along preparing meals with gritted teeth for a good month there. i credit the return of this spark to the much needed break i took on our 3 day vacation that resulted in us eating solely theme park food. while delicious, in all its greasy overpriced glory, i found myself missing the kitchen. so last night for dinner i made heavily spiced chicken wings with crushed peppercorns and garam masala that rendered slowly in its own fat while roasting in the oven, resulting in flavorful charred crisp skin and a really juicy bite. we picked them clean over steamed rice with lime and scallions. i also baked a loaf of marbled pumpkin and dark chocolate bread yesterday for my neighbor as a thank you for doing me a favor last week. it looked delicious. the crumb was tender and plush and velvety, the spiced ginger molasses pumpkin batter swirling alongside the bitter dark chocolate espresso batter, with puddles of dark chocolate bubbling across its top. it looked so lovely i whipped up a second one for us to have for ourselves that's in the oven now, i think it could be a really good breakfast pastry for us this week.

[kitakami-kid]

im never forgetting when i beat sv for the first time and got ed sheeran jumpscared

[milkbreadtoast]

my s class hunters does a really good job at gradually raising the stakes without feeling like a pointless power creep and keeping me extremely invested and i keep saying this but I really do think it's bc it's a story grounded in love at every turn... the bond between the han brothers especially is extremely compelling and beautiful and makes me feel like a knife is being stabbed into my heart and twisted all around... i love them so so much 😞💔❤️‍🩹❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

[mandiemegatron]

Selfshippers with "selfshippers DNI" in their bio make me laugh, but its like... an awkward laugh.

"How dare you love the same character i do. How dare you wish that the guy I SHIP WITH would love and support you 😤😤😤 HOW DARE YOU GET FANART WITH MY F/O!! HES MINE YOU CANT HAVE HIM!!"

Babe... go touch some grass and drink some water. Maybe you'll feel better. 😬

[skitskatdacat63]

"Bring on The Dancing Horses"(x) - Echo and The Bunnymen × Ferrari Drivers

[floorpancakes]

smth kinda fucked up about watching doumeki go from whole assedly making life or death decisions for watanuki as a desperate but firm love language every other tuesday to fucking sitting in quiet anguish with a pained look on his face with his eyebrows fucking tweaking out, still able to make life or death protective decisions sometimes but being fucking paralysed with indecision most times that don't involve immediate physical actions to the point it's clearly ripping his head and heart in two even if he still retains that refusal to give up

[radiantmists]

man especially having now read the flashbacks i think about how hard xie lian always tries and how many people have told him that he tries too hard, that he never should have bothered and that doing so made things worse, or even more commonly just hating on him for not fixing things or being arrogant or whatever they think his problem is. and some of those people are probably even coming from caring places!

but before hua cheng, had anyone ever sat next to him and said, you tried and that's good, it matters that you cared, you did your best. nobody could have done better than you.

how badly must xie lian have needed that?

[shivroy]

the world before covid is not coming back, we can't turn back time, we can't live the way we did before, and just because the media on both left-wing and right-wing platforms is acting like it can doesn't make that untruth into reality. if you live the way you lived before, you are killing people. that's not an exaggeration, it is the reality that's being ignored in service of american apathy

[trans-estinien]

i love being autistic cause sometimes i get a glimpse into how regular people perceive things and its like. what the fuck. what the fuck is that? you live like this? and its normal?? i think YOURE the weird one actually. im fine. thanks though.

[faaun]

ok let's catch up quickly