#make open queer characters
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“They say when you unmask, you can never mask again. It’s not true for everybody; which is why I escaped.”
So who’s gonna write a Teen Dystopia novel about what’s being done to so many autistic kids in ABA and schools similar?
Who’s going to talk about what our generation has done and will do to stop the hatred towards us?
Nothing About Us Without Us
#nothing about us without us#red instead#gold instead#infinity symbol#quote from a book I’ll never write#actually autistic#autistic#autism#teen dystopia#book#teen dystopian novel#tw aba mention#make the book blatantly about disabled as a whole#make open queer characters#it’s us but it’s not them#it’s not them it’s so many#it’s not us vs them#it’s us vs so many#do not forget
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I need people to understand how S&P (standards and practices) works in television and how much influence they have over what gets to stay IN an episode of a show and how the big time network execs are the ones holding the purse strings and making final decisions on a show's content, not the writers / showrunners / creatives involved.
So many creators have shared S&P notes over the years of the wild and nonsensical things networks wanted them to omit / change / forbid. Most famously on tumblr, I've seen it so many times, is the notes from Gravity Falls. But here's a post compiling a bunch of particularly bad ones from various networks too. Do you see the things they're asking to be changed / cut ?
Now imagine, anything you want to get into your show and actually air has to get through S&P and the network execs. A lot of creators have had to resort to underhanded methods. A lot of creators have had to relegate things to subtext and innuendo and scenes that are "open to interpretation" instead of explicit in meaning. Things have had to be coded and symbolized. And they're relying on their audience to be good readers, good at media literacy, to notice and get it. This stuff isn't the ramblings of conspiracy theorists, it's the true practices creatives have had to use to be able to tell diverse stories for ages. The Hays Code is pretty well known, it exists because of censorship. It was a way to symbolize certain things and get past censors.
Queercoding, in particular, has been used for ages in both visual media and literature do signal to queer audiences that yes, this character is one of us, but no, we can't be explicit about it because TPTB won't allow it. It's a wink-wink, nudge-nudge to those in the know. It's the deliberate use of certain queer imagery / clothing / mannerisms / phrases / references to other queer media / subtle glances and lingering touches. Things that offer plausible deniability and can be explained away or go unnoticed by straight audiences to get past those network censors. But that queer viewers WILL (hopefully) pick up on.
Because, unfortunately, still to this day, a lot of antiquated network execs don't think queer narratives are profitable. They don't think they'll appeal to general audiences, because that's what matters, whatever appeals to most of the audience demographic so they can keep watching and keep making the network more money. The networks don't care about telling good stories! Most of them are old white cishet business men, not creatives. They don't care about character arcs and what will make fans happy. They don't care about storytelling. What they care about is profit and they're basing their ideas of what's profitable on what they believe is the predominate target demographic, usually white cis heterosexual audiences.
So, imagine a show that started airing in the early 2000s. Imagine a show where the two main characters are based on two characters from a famous Beat Generation novel, where one of the characters is queer! based on a real like bisexual man! The creator is aware of this, most definitely. And sure, it's 2005, there's no way they were thinking of making that explicit about Dean in the text because it just wouldn't fly back then to have a main character be queer. But! it's made subtext. And there are nods to that queerness placed in the text. Things that are open to interpretation. Things that are drenched in metaphor (looking at you 1x06 Skin "I know I'm a freak" "maybe this thing was born human but was different...hated. Until he learned to become someone else.") Things that are blink-and-you-miss-it and left to plausible deniability (things like seemingly spending an hour in the men's bathroom, or always reacting a little vulnerable and awkward when you're clocked instead of laughing it off and making a homophobic joke abt it)
And then, years later there's a ship! It's popular and at first the writers aren't really seriously thinking about it but they'll throw the fans a bone here and there. Then, some writers do get on the destiel train and start actively writing scenes for them that are suggestive. And only a fraction of what they write actually makes it into the text. So many lines left on the cutting room floor: i love past you. i forgive you i love you. i lost cas and it damn near broke me. spread cas's ashes alone. of course i wanted you to stay. if cas were here. -- etc. Everything cut was not cut by the writers! Why would a writer write something to then sabotage their own story and cut it? No, these are things that didn't make it past the network. Somewhere a note was made maybe "too gay" or "don't feed the shippers" or simply "no destiel."
So, "no destiel." That's pretty clearly the message we got from the CW for years. "No destiel. Destiel will alienate our general audience. Two of our main characters being queer? And in a relationship? No way." So what can the pro-destiel creatives involved do, if the network is saying no? What can the writers do if most of their explicit destiel (or queer dean) lines / moments are getting cut? Relegate things to subtext. Make jokes that straight people can wave off but queer people can read into. Make costuming and set design choices that the hardcore fans who are already looking will notice while the general audience and the out-of-touch network execs won't blink and eye at (I'm looking at you Jerry and your lamps and disappearing second nightstands and your gay flamingo bar!)
And then, when the audience asks, "is destiel real? is this proof of destiel?" what can the creatives do but deny? Yes, it hurts, to be told "No no I don't know what you're talking about. There's no destiel in supernatural" a la "there is no war in Ba Sing Se" but! if the network said "no destiel!" and you and your creative team have been working to keep putting destiel in the subtext of the narrative in a way that will get past censors, you can't just go "Yes, actually, all that subtext and symbolism you're picking up, yea it's because destiel is actually in the narrative."
But, there's a BIG difference between actively putting queer themes and subtext into the narrative and then saying it's not there (but it is! and the audience sees it!) versus NOT putting any queer content into the text but SAYING it is there to entice queer fans to continue watching. The latter, is textbook queerbaiting. The former? Is not. The former is the tactics so many creatives have had to use for years, decades, centuries, to get past censorship and signal to those in the know that yea, characters like you are here, they exist in this story.
Were the spn writers perfect? No, absolutely not. And I don't think every instance of queer content was a secret signal. Some stuff, depending on the writer, might've been a period-typical gay joke. These writers are flawed. But it's no secret that there were pro-destiel writers in the writing room throughout the years, and that efforts were made to make it explicitly canon (the market research!)
So no, the writers weren't ever perfect or a homogeneous entity. But they definitely were fighting an uphill battle constantly for 15 yrs against S&P and network execs with antiquated ideas of what's profitable / appealing.
Spn even called out the networks before, on the show, using a silly example of complaints abt the lighting of the show and how dark the early seasons were. Brightening the later seasons wasn't a creative choice, but a network choice. And if the networks can complain abt and change something as trivial as the lighting of a show, they definitely are having a hand in influencing the content of the show, especially queer content.
Even in s15, (seasons fifteen!!!) Misha has said he worried Castiel's confession would not air. In 2020!!! And Jensen recorded that scene on his personal phone! Why? Sure, for the memories. But also, I do not doubt for a second that part of it was for insurance, should the scene mysteriously disappear completely. We've seen the finale script. We've seen the omitted omitted omitted scenes. We all saw how they hacked the confession scene to bits. The weird cuts and close-ups. That's not the writers doing. That's likely not even the editors (willingly). That's orders from on high. All of the fuckery we saw in s15 reeks of network interference. Writers are not trying to sabotage their own stories, believe me.
Anyways, TLDR: Networks have a lot more power than many think and they get final say in what makes it to air. And for years creative teams have had to find ways to get past network censorship if they want "banned" or "unapproved" "unprofitable" "unwanted" content to make it into the show. That means relying on techniques like symbolism, subtext, and queercoding, and then shutting up about it. Denying its there, saying it's all "open to interpretation" all while they continue to put that open to interpretation content into the show. And that's not queerbaiting, as frustrating as it might be for queer audiences to be told that what they're seeing isn't there, it's still not queerbaiting. Queerbaiting is a marketing technique to draw in queer fans by baiting them with the promise of queer content and then having no queer content in said media. But if you are picking up on queer themes / subtext / symbolism / coding that is in front of your face IN the text, that's not queerbaiting. It's there, covertly, for you, because someone higher up didn't want it to be there explicitly or at all.
#long post#LONG-ass post#but it needed to be said!#i'm sorry if you think every creative involved with spn was a braindead asshole but the thing is.#even the most mediocre of writers understands a thing or two abt symbolism and writers working in TV are plagued by S&P#countless writers have talked abt the S&P bullshit and having to tweak and edit down their work to get past censors#it's a reality of writing for television#and the people who understand all this and understand the context of making TV in the early 2000s (to present tbh!) aren't 'delusional'#i'm sorry but it's naive to think that queer stories and queer characters are free to be told even nowadays. it's still a constant battle#times have changed but unfortunately not as much as you'd think#the confession !!!!! the confession still struggled to air and what we got was so obviously hacked down to bits!!!!!!#how can anyone think getting destiel content into the show was ever easy?#how can anyone think the pro-destiel writers weren't constantly having to be careful and underhanded in their writing?#there's a reason queercoding and subtext exist and it's this!!! it's censorship from TPTB#anyways. people much older than me have been talking abt this for ages. younger fans who are used to more open queer rep need to understand#it hasn't always been that easy and even nowadays SO many networks are still not willing to take a risk on queer stories#so creators do what they can#vic.txt
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got bored, nekoma ship wheel + sexuality hcs (explanations under cut along with empty templates in case anyone wants them)
FUKUTORA TIER
This is self-explainatory. They're basically 90% of my account. If you go to the fukutora tag its just me talking to myself because no one else has posted in it since 2022
LOVE
Kuroken - I have specific opinions on Kuroken because I'm a fan of unrequited Kenhina in highschool. Don't get me wrong, I still like how most of the fandom portrays them, but I much prefer them getting together after the timeskip when everyone's settled into their new jobs. I also really like it queerplatonic, as much or even more than romantic.
Inushiba- Idk man they're just silly, no deeper reasoning. Funny guys doing funny things with a cute height difference
LIKE
Kuroyaku/Levyaku - Honestly I like these two about equally, i think they're both shitpost-able and that's my top priority for a ship. My gf likes Levyaku so i lean towards them but i've seen some good Kuroyaku art too so i can be won over. I'm a firm believer that Kuroo and Yaku were each other's first kiss
Fukutoraken - I think Kenma being a serial third-wheel is infinitely funnier but i dont mind it, as long as fukutora aren't separated i'm chilling. Kenma getting dragged along despite not being part of the relationship is my ideal for them tho, also i think Kenma being Tora's unwilling wingman/the recipient of his sexuality crisis rambles is hillarious
Anything else i'm neutral on or haven't heard of
#i only included the stuff i've seen so if I left out some rarepair that you're obsessed with feel free to preach it to me#my ears are opened to most dynamics expect any ship that separates fukutora because they're my everything#thinking about them with anyone but each other makes me an evil bitter person i'm sorry#aside from them if the art/writing/analysis post is good enough i can have fun with most things#my other favorite hq ship is tsukkiyama btw they're my ogs#I may not know what to do with the first year sexualities but i DO know that they're all queer#because the ONLY cishet character in all of haikyuu is tanaka#nekoma#haikyuu#haikyuu headcanons#ant's rambling tag woo#this is technically my art but i don't think she deserves the tag
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you🫵, you're gay /j
(ur not wrong tho.....)
#shenanigans#im queer#as is almost every character i make lol#sometimes i wanna canonize vpbj as transmasculine#but then im always like..... but nonbinary donnie#BUT TRANSFEMME DONNIE#agender mikey..... how do we chooseee#so yah its always open for interpretation#even if i do make smthing abt them being trans
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Yes i think joyfire would be a horrible ship in execution especially with how dirty RHatO did Kori and Roy. Yes i want to bang my head against the wall every time I remember it wasn’t canon even if it was just Kori dating both Roy and Jason but them not dating each other because dc always has to make being gay a big deal. I contain multitudes.
#diversity win! they’re a throuple!#diversity lose! they’re mischaracterized!#…i guess unique characters is a form of diversity now? i don’t know what I’m saying#bones’ bitching hours#joyfire#‘dc always has to make being gay a big deal’ i mean like. lately it feels like every queer character HAS to be an ambassador of the lgbt#there’s no more opening a comic and getting blindsided by lesbianism that is treated like any other trait a character has#but on the other hand there’s a lot less ‘this character HAS to experience queerphobia’ or ‘wait Wonder Woman is gay?!?’#so#there’s some give and take
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i just wanted to let you know that Machete being queer means so much to me. I‘m following your art for many many years now and you and your characters have been a big inspiration baaack in my teens. I was struggling with the possibility of a queer identity alot back then and I remember looking for a trace of queerness in every character I adored. I‘ve always loved Machete and today, as I‘m seeing your art again regulary on my timeline, it brings me so much joy that you’re telling this bittersweet queer story through your characters. Thank you!
Thank you so much for taking the time to leave such a heartfelt message! You've made my day ;w;
#I'm sorry to hear you had such rough time back then I wish my art could've been more helpful to you#he's a very old character and as silly as it is I've been processing a lot of similar feelings through him since I was a teenager myself#but I got increasingly hesitant to open up about my ocs over the years so I kept most of their lore and context strictly private#it's taken a lot of climbing over mental roadblocks to get back to a point where it feels alright and acceptable to talk about them again#and be more transparent about their lives and inner workings and in this case queer identity#so hearing that they resonate so strongly with people means a lot to me#it makes me feel a lot less shy and embarrassed about sharing them#answered#anonymous
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i finally finished my TF2 self insert's actual ref(s)
please interact this shit took so fucking long
Yes he's basically a sniper knock off leave me alone 😭 im creative i swear
Praying Tumblr doesn't absolutely nerf the quality, even though it probably will 💔
#tf2#team fortress 2#self insert#tf2 oc#tf2 self insert#tf2 sona#oc#original character#i am cringe but i am free#this drawing took twenty fucking hours#im not joking#why did i do this#digital art#art#disabled artist#queer artist#cringe#my commissions r open btw#this fella is gay for spy and medic#its a self insert i have to ship him with my faves#i love making gay little art
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Bingo! How alike are you to my characters? (tag game)
Rules: when tagged, fill out the tagger's bingo(s) to see how similar you are to their OCs. then, make a bingo or two for your own OCs and tag anyone you want to play! Bingo made with BingoBaker (remember to share the link!)
Lightly tagging @sleepyrxsetea @kaylinalexanderbooks @blind-the-winds @americanfemcel @meerawrites @blackrosesandwhump @kbwritesstuff @illarian-rambling @faeriecinna @guessillcallitart @simonnebethel plus an open tag!! please join in and @ me <3
#sorry guys i just loved the bingo tag game so i wanted to do another one#also sorry i cannot explain things (a bad trait for a writer) i hope the rules make sense#writeblr#tag game#open tag#ocs#original character#oc tag#oc tag game#writers#writer community#queer writers#queer characters#lesbian#asexual#aromantic#lgbtq#bingo#bingo template
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ok sorry the OTHER thing about lucienne is like. as previously stated she is dream's handpicked emissary from the waking world to the dreaming she's the diplomat in chief she's the translator she's the bridge. because the dreaming is, in a very real way, dream's own psyche, this is tantamount to giving lucienne a tremendous degree of access to his interiority and by transitive property also tantamount to entering into a deeply emotionally intimate relationship with her (unimportant for the purposes of this post whether that relationship is platonic or romantic).
now, in general, looking at the pattern of dream's close emotional relationships—dream doesn't share himself with people as a rule (beyond the access that all things that live have to the dreaming; but i'm talking about his self here, the one he doesn't like to acknowledge he even has), but when he does share with people, it's with people who have some shadow on the soul, so to speak. just looking at attested relationships in show canon, his deepest emotional connection seems to be with death, who embodies the duality of light and dark even better than he does himself. calliope is the muse of epic poetry—heroism and tragedy—and also bears the sort of divine pride that led her to cut dream off for hundreds or thousands of years when he wronged her. the less said about that other guy, the better, but he's no sunshine-rainbows-unicorns type—he's a soldier of fortune, a bandit and a killer, a man who profits from the sale of human life. even best bird matthew, in comix canon, had a sordid past that will maybe be partially retconned for the show but has still been gestured at.
dream likes the complicated ones. he's drawn to them. they speak to something in him that he won't acknowledge in himself (he has to be Whole, fully integrated, without reservation, because he is the king and he is the dreaming and if the dreaming ain't whole then the universe is in trouble—but he feels that ache nonetheless).
all that is to say: when people try to portray lucienne as dream's Designated Well-Adjusted Neurotypical Friend, i begin to harm and maim.
#chatter#as usual there is a larger pattern of behavior around this post that has been making me crazy for some time#it's the ''holder of the braincell'' trope but it's also just like the flattening of female characters of color in every possible dimension#so many people are terrified. TERRIFIED. to imagine a woman of color's pain#because the demands of shallow progressivism are such that they require you to acknowledge that A Black Woman Has Suffered More#Than Anyone Else Ever In The History Of The World Ever; Because Of Racism#but the demands of wider fandom are such that they require you to buy into the concept that A White Man's Suffering#Is The Only Suffering Worthy Of Care Attention Or Interest.#can't handle the dichotomy so instead they create the imago of a Black woman who has never suffered anything ever#she cannot be mentally ill; she cannot be disabled; if she is queer then it is in a way that is wholly self-contained and complete#and not ambiguous or in flux in any way; and most important of ALL she can never have experienced racism.#because racism As We Know is the worst form of suffering. so if she'd suffered racism then that would make her more worthy of#compassion than White Guy No. 37. which must not be#the very idea that lucienne is simply at peace with herself and the dreaming with no further complication.......like!#WOMEN OF COLOR ARE NEVER AFFORDED THAT KIND OF CERTAINTY. ARE YOU STUPID.#and by the way being reserved/calm/unassuming/practical are NOT absolute indicators of mental wellness.#y'all can see this when it's a white guy what is your fucking DAMAGE when it comes to women of color.#OPEN YOUR EYES. USE YOUR POWERS OF DEDUCTIVE REASONING. DREAM DIDN'T CHOOSE HER TO BE HIS THERAPIST.#DREAM CHOSE HER BECAUSE; PRESUMABLY; SHE ACHES. SHE CONTRADICTS. SHE GRAPPLES WITH THE SHADOW ON THE MIND.#SOMETHING IN HIM SEES A KINDRED SOUL IN HER. WAKE UP FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
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🏳️🌈Pride edit requests open!!🏳️🌈
In keeping with the theme of my recent silvergifting edit, I'm going to be making edits of queer Tolkien ships for pride month! I have a list of ships already, but if anyone has any ship requests please send them in!!
Editing to add that these will be open from now until the end of June!
#i might also do specific characters with specific flags but we'll see if i can get the colors figured out#ill make a separate post for those if I open them#pride month#queer tolkien#silmarillion#my edit
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COMMISSIONS OPEN!
hey YOU🫵
would you like EPIC AMAZING ART?
then consider commissioning me!!!
i'm down for almost anything, my prices range from 3$ to 45$!!!
if not, consider reblogging this post to help me out!<3
#art#digital art#commissions open#zombiebitezzz art#artblr#please commission me#commission sheet#art commisions#furry art#oc#original character#furry commissions#queer#i need money 💔#im trying to make art my full time job#so i guess this is a way to start
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BISEXUALISM!!!! LOVE TO SEE IT!!!!!!!!!!
#I LOVE SURPRISE QUEER CHARACTERS/COUPLES/STORYLINES ETC#LIKE IK THERES NOT GONNA BE AN ACTUAL MLM ROMANCE BUT#A SURPRISE QUEER CHARACTER IS ENOUGH TO MAKE ME HAPPY#AAAAAAAA#I KNEW I LIKED HIM FROM THE START#until someone tells me 'actually it was translated wrong'#shhh ill live in denial then#my new boss is goofy#my new boss is goofy spoilers#also sidenote: i tried like 800 times to get a screenshot with his mouth open#and it just wasnt happening so i gave up LOL
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FOR REAL I GET SO MAD WHEN I SEE POSTS LIKE "eww why are ntsmg fans such weirdos!! They dont deserve to have natsume/tsumugi as their favs!!" Like first of all we're not hurting anybody pls let us LIVE, second of all Have You Seen the Characters in Question. Like if we're freaks then what does that make THEM!??!? If they were real theyd be the freaks ur complaining abt!!! TL;DR natsumugi loser weirdo freaks canon and im here for it. Also that alice natsume is so CUUUUTE
ITS KIND OF ODD TBH ?? like obviously i get that not everyones going to like the same stuff but like. if you dont like characters being weird, why do You then also like ntmg.......? if its someone who doesnt ship them thats complaining then fine whatever but its so weird to me when people who claim to ship them make these complaints bc its like?? then why do you ship them???? do you Only like the bits where the two of them are being sweet to each other? do you only like their angsty backstory? do you only like the comedic relief? i have a hard time grasping the idea of dedicating yourself to a pair or character without loving (or at the very least tolerating) every aspect of them........ have these people read the stories? or are they being deliberately oblivious? i have no idea
it makes me really sad how people are so afraid of being seen as "weird" though. too often that word comes with negative connotations when that doesnt need to be the case at all, and i wish these people would stop living in fear and surrounding themselves with those who judge people based off how Socially Normal (according to a christian society) they are
also i just get annoyed seeing ntmg get watered down to some idealized couple completely stripped from their complexities to better fit what we're taught is Morally Correct (according to puritanical beliefs) or reduced to a comedic duo SHDKJFHD
#some of you people really need to learn to live a little#because not allowing yourself to indulge in what you enjoy or just getting mad at OTHERS for indulging in harmless behaviour#is going to make you miserable#and i really fucking wish this shit wasnt so ingrained in todays people#because such a judgemental and reactionary attitude genuinely is harmful especially towards queer people#but thats a whole other discussion for another day#and as i always say its OKAY to be uncomfortable with things#there are MANYYYYYY ntmg artists who make things that makes me very uncomfortable so i SIMPLY DO NOT ENGAGE!#but to act like ntmg Themselves arent weird ???#and like you cant possibly understand why the fans might indulge in some weird stuff too ??#thats gotta just be projecting on your end atp#ask#btw this is about harmless self-expression and exploration via fiction and not LITERAL CRIMES#just so you fuckers dont go assuming shit because Jesus Christ the second you start being open about accepting weirdness and being weird#people automatically assume the worst shit imaginable which is so fucking insulting to literally every single human being on the planet#this post is about fictional characters being weird and us being allowed to indulge in it#do Not twist my words into Anything else.#EDIT OMG I GOT SO CAUGHT UP IN BEING ANGRY AT STRANGERS ONLINE I FORGOT U COMPLIMENTED ME#THANK U VERY MUCH!!!!! ASJHFKAJSHDG
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Warrior Cat AU Design 👀
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I DM for a group of my friends a homebrew campaign heavily inspired by Zootopia & Beastars that has been lovingly nicknamed “Fantasy Zootopia” by my players.
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Recently I’ve been on a kick coming up with concepts for what they would look like as a warrior cat. I love coming up with their names and details to draw back to the player character.
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This is Petaldrop! (she/her) based on Petunia the lop-eared rabbit. She has, so many kiddos, and her dead spouse just hangs out rent free in camp with her because frankly - it’s boring in Starclan!
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Character belongs to @morbidgiggling design by me!
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If you’re interested in my work feel free to DM me! I’m taking commissions to save up for surgery!
#warrior cats oc#wc oc#au artwork#personal character art#wc art#wc artist#warrior cats#wc au#fantasy Zootopia#my design#commissions open#gofundme#fundraising#lgbtqia artist#queer artist#I’m so normal about these design concepts and ideas I promise#SHE CARRIES HER DEAD SPOUSES FOOT AROUND IRL GAME#I DIDNT MAKE THAT UP#yes she does get looks from her clan mates#no she does not care#she’s the best clan gramma around#she has so many kids and so many grandkids#she also insists on still attending patrols and gatherings#she does not care what you think#also she’s a necromancer and she does know her spouse is there#they meet to sunbathe together in the afternoon
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succession is simultaneously a:
shakespearean tragedy
postmodern tragicomedy
drama about dysfunctional families and cycles of abuse/trauma
comedy about the absurdity of the ultra wealthy
surreal circus of repressed queerness
political critique of the toxicity of late-stage capitalism
trying to pinpoint exactly what kind of show it is feels impossible, and that's what makes it good – you can rewatch it and experience it from a different lens each and every time and i love it for that
#listened to an interview w the writers who were asked if succession is a tragedy with comedic elements or a comedy with tragic elements#and the answer was basically that they don't really think of it that way and it's impossible to categorize it either way#like there's no real ratio of tragedy: comedy it kind of transcends that at least in my experience#i think the architecture of the story is more like a tragedy but it often expresses itself in comedic moments#and there's the political commentary that underscores it all#and i dont think its really possible to separate all these elements they live together and work with each other#similar to how the opening theme is a mixture of classical music and hip hop and would not be the same without either of those elements#that but with all the different layers that the show exists in#i added the queerness point in not because it's like. a necessarily popular view but because there is a way u can watch it where it's just#*just like. everyone is so fruity and fucked up and repressed#and it's p much canon that none of the side characters are straight#and roman def isn't but i dont think any of the siblings except maybe connor are#and it's like wow this is like the dark twisted alternate universe's queer found family trope#(love it for that. btw.)#i talk so much in tags i should just make another fucking post sorry#succession#hbo succession#queerasian.txt
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i've got stuff to do tonight but i am thinking about how it absolutely fucking pains me to see the joy and energy and love of living sapped from constantine's spirit over the initial run of hellblazer. like he goes from this spirited, wisecracking, life-loving, bully-punching, fastidious little guy to a man so disintegrated by decades of grief and being used and never being good enough for anyone that he was willing to be buried alive to serve a cause he didn't even care about. thank god they gave him back some friendly connections and some semblance of hope by the end of "red right hand", because that late-hellblazer constantine was utterly unrecognizable and it broke my heart.
#( ooc. ) OUT OF CIGS.#now let's be real: this shift was 90% that shitbird azzarello's fault#because that loser could not BEGIN to fathom the radical kindness and open queerness of early hellblazer and he didn't even fucking try#and his writing stained the character for YEARS because so many after him continued with that Macho Quasi-Devil image#and there is a LOT of his run that i categorically refuse to take as text#but from an in-universe perspective? seeing constantine crumble over time like that? fucking Oof#the beast of eden + rosacarnis + the gift/cheryl dying were really a turning point for him. they were his last straw#and i always like to read 'red right hand' with the grieving process close to mind because that's his depression + acceptance stage#the point where he finally finds something to live for again and starts to climb back out of his spiral#anyway shoutout to si spurrier for bringing some of john's love of the little things in life back to his run bc FUCK was it some fresh air#acknowledging all his trauma and all he's lost while still giving him moments of levity? Bless#idk does any of this make sense? i've been on a reread and losing my mind as always
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